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I've yet to know an absence that wasn't also a relief.

Syzygy, Beauty T. Fleishmann

#essay #poetry #literature #absence #relief #read this shit

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131. The No.  So we must forgive all those Who trespass against us? Fuck that shit.  I'm not some charitable trust.  There are people I will hate  Even after I'm ashes and dust.

You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me, Sherman Alexie

#memoir #creative nonfiction #poem #forgiveness #mother

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He'd long forsworn all weighing of consequence and allowing as he did that men's destinies are given yet he usurped to contain within him all that he would ever be in the world and all that the world would be to him and be his charter written in the urstone itself he claimed agency and said so and he'd drive the remorseless sun on to its final endarkenment as if he'd ordered it all ages since, before there were paths anywhere, before there were men or suns to go down on them.

Blood Meridian, Cormac McCarthy

#cormac mccarthy #blood meridian #grit lit #destiny #consequence #literature

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Judith, giving implicit trust where she had given love, giving implicit love where she had derived breath and pride: that true pride, not that false kind which transforms what it does not at the moment understand into scorn and outrage and so vents itself in pique and lacerations, but true pride which can say to itself without abasement, I love, I will accept no substitute; something has happened between him and my father; if my father was right, I will never see him again, if wrong he will come or send for me; if happy I can be I will, if suffer I must I can. Because she waited; she made no effort to do anything else.

Absalom, Absalom! William Faulkner

#Absalom #Judith #heroine #love

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Renunciation -- is a piercing Virtue.

Emily Dickinson, 745 

#poetry #anorexia #emily dickinson

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Ireland, 2017

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We shouldn't have to be witty or backtrack or second-guess ourselves when we say 'this shit hurts.' We shouldn't have to disclaim - 'I know, I know, pain is old, other girls hurt' - in order to defend ourselves from the old litany of charges: performative, pitiful, self-pitying, pity-hearding, pity-mongering. The pain is what you make of it. You have to find something in it that yields. I understood my imperative as: keep bleeding, but love.

Leslie Jamison, Grand Unified Theory of Female Pain 

#leslie jamison #essay #empathy exams #feminism #pain #love #live

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when west coast winter arrives by Everything is magic on Flickr.

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Coastal Days//Oregon March 2017

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Because if memory exists outside of the flesh it wont be memory because it wont know what it remembers so when she became not then half of memory became not and if I become not then all of remembering will cease to be. –Yes […] Between grief and nothing I will take grief.

William Faulkner from Wild Palms [If I Forget Thee Jerusalem] (Random House, 1939)

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reblog and make a wish! this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)

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