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mesukita · 11 days

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[ Modern AU ] p1

Modern AU is also a spin-off of Tower, an alternate universe with the same characters as in canon, but in a different setting. Here it's a society of ordinary living people in our modern world.

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(In this AU I decided to use their lifetime names, or rather their abbreviations: Than from Thanatos for Second, V from Virgicht for First, G from Gia for Ghost. As an author I still call them canon nicknames, but within this story the characters address each other by those names.)

– I don't mean to sound like a stalker, but I think I know you. – You do. – That must have sounded kinda creepy… – Just a little bit. – Sorry. If you're in a hurry, I don't want to keep you. – Honestly, no, I'm not in a hurry. So… where have we seen each other? – I don't know. In a previous life? – You believe in that kind of things? – Maybe. Do you? – Maybe. ___

In Modern AU, Ghost met First first. Strangely enough, it was her initiative to start a conversation. And First impressed her immediately. He is charismatic, erudite, and generally quite an interesting person. Quite sociable and curious, so the prospect of a new person on the horizon always attracted him. He's enthusiastic about "testing the waters" and exploring, so such interest from him flattered Ghost. Especially considering their age difference. In this AU Ghost is about 18 years old, when as the First is almost 25. At first they only chatted, but they did it really a lot, their messages were just miles long. Then they started seeing each other from time to time, then more and more often. Well, the scenario is the most usual, nothing special. Living First is far more attentive and listening than his necrotic version, he's just as fond of talking, but he also listens and observes his companion intently himself. Ghost is also much more relaxed and confident, she flirts and teases, she laughs and smiles more often, she genuinely enjoys their conversation, and so does First. So their relationship was off to quite a pleasant start. Not without quarrels and some cold days, of course, but this is natural for human relationships. First quickly learned to "read" Ghost, to understand her thoughts, to anticipate her desires, to complete phrases in dialogues for her, and Ghost was very much attracted by this. He really understood her well, and that was exactly what she was looking for. First himself remained unpredictable and mysterious to her. Ghost felt that he had a dark side, but everyone did, so Ghost saw no good reason to worry. In a way, this inner darkness challenged her and provoked her to look into Pandora's box. But First is not very good at trust, so he cleverly distanced himself. He knows how to conduct a dialog in such a way that the other person will tell everything about themselves, while First will tell almost nothing about himself. And at the same time it won't be like a monologue and everyone will have fun. It wasn't that he didn't tell Ghost anything about himself, of course not, but if you compared the way Ghost told him about her life and the way he did it, there was a significant difference. In short, he poured a lot of water. Often, First carefully mirrored some of Ghost's own personal views, manner of communication, values, or stances in life. Ghost felt as if she had found a soul mate. Such behavior had become his habit, because it always seemed to increase the points of contact and dispose people to each other. Nevertheless, First really liked Ghost a lot, strange to say it, but he was even in love with her. Ghost thought she had met the love of her life.

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Ghost and First met six months before her high school graduation. Ghost had finished high school diligently and was preparing to go to university. She had planned to live in the dorms, but First offered to move in with him. They had already been dating for a while and had become quite close, plus he had his own large apartment that happened to be not far from her future university. Ghost thought it was a good idea. She didn't tell her parents about it and lied about living in a dormitory. Ghost was very reserved about her family and didn't tell them much. She didn't even mention the fact that she had a boyfriend for six months, and if they asked her, she would lie that she had no one. Not that her relationship with her parents was bad, but it was cold and distant. Her parents didn't know about their daughter's life, what she was interested in, what she liked, what she dreamed about. When she shared this with them as a young teenager, she only faced misunderstanding and judgment, so over time she hid in her shell and really shut herself away, not only within her family, but with everyone. Ghost wasn't such an outsider, but she didn't have any close friends either. So, let's be honest, the attention and interest from First was a glimmer of light to her at the depths where she had settled. And for a man like First, it wasn't hard to show a little patience and find an approach to a young girl.

First himself, in his turn, was not eager to get in touch with her parents either. He didn't think it was necessary unless they were getting married, and he wasn't even thinking of getting married, and he wasn't in a hurry to introduce her to his family. It wasn't a problem for either of them, they were fine with what they had at the time. He and Ghost mostly hung out at his house, so his apartment was already a familiar and comfortable place. For Ghost his proposal to move in together was not unexpected and she had anticipated something like that, but she didn't dare to ask for it herself. If they were going to take their relationship to the next level, she wanted him to be the one to make the move. Of course, First realized that this would require Ghost to go much deeper into the details of his life and personality, but he was willing to let her into his world, to become a part of hers as well.

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— I love listening to you.

These are cherished words for everyone who likes to talk, like knowing that you are being listened to and that someone is genuinely interested in your talking. Ghost is a great listener in general, she is attentive to the other person's story, she knows how to keep the narrative thread alive even if the story is full of random details and the person jumps from topic to topic. She doesn't interrupt and knows at what point it's best to add to the dialog, ask something or make a joke. so by the principles of conversation, by the level of extroversion/introversion, First and Ghost work well together in a dialog. (I sometimes see comments like, well, what did she see in him, how did they get together, but their relationship puzzle is made up of a bunch of small details). As for First, he actually reacts very emotionally to everything, but some of his reactions fall under his own internal filter of how a "real man" should or should not react to anything. So he just smugly closed his eyes at this compliment from her, while inside he almost squealed with joy.

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— Are you still afraid of him or something? — No, just... a little. — Pfft, come on. (No way.) — My sweet soul, as long as I'm around, you have no one to fear… (But me.)

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– I had a dream about you today. – What kind of dream was it? – It was a nightmare.

First in modern is probably the softest of all the variants of his character in all the possible Tower AU. There he's still a living person, mortal and feeling (not as much as you'd like, but still). And as is often the case with the living - no one pours out all his black soul on you from the doorstep.

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Mini-episode #1. 4\4

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— You like it? — It's beautiful, really, but, uh. I don't wear chains. — That's okay, it's never too late to start. — It's just-- — Baby, I know you have no idea how much that necklace is worth, but can you at least say thank you? — Thanks... Really, you shouldn't have. — I'll decide. It looks good on you.

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– Look, I've never been to one of these things. Maybe I shouldn't go. – Are you kidding? I already told everyone I'm bringing a date. – I just don't know what to do, what to say. There's gonna be tons of people there and everyone's, like, so important. – Mm-hmm. You don't have to say anything. Just sit back, drink your cocktails and smile, sweetheart. We're going to relax, right?

headcanon: at modern au, First smokes like a chimney, strong, super stinky cigarettes that make your fucking eyes water. Ghost smokes occasionally, only when she's drunk, and only something very light, like slims. she asked him to try to quit smoking, but it was a dead end, because he's been smoking for a million years and he's not going to give up the habit. at least he stopped smoking in the apartment all the time.

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"If you live with wolves you must howl like a wolf."

In general, for First/Ghost biting is a love language 🥴 they'd rather bite than kiss and cuddle. Ghost bites not only because she has learned to speak to First in his language, but also because it is also characteristic of her. in this respect, they really do match up.

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First's closet is mostly monochrome and black, he isn't a fan of anything colored at all. He usually dresses quite lightly, even in winter he wears a thin coat. Hats it's who? A scarf at most. Prefers the classic style, just like his mother. It was her, in particular, who unconsciously instilled the love for this style in him. Although in his youth he wore leather and army boots. As teenagers, he and Second were into metal and dressed like informals. But in reality, First has always had an inner desire to look older. He's the youngest in the family, so he often found that he wasn't taken seriously. So he thought that if he looked more formal and solid, he would be perceived differently, and then it just became a habit.

Second's closet's based on something between casual and sporty. He likes loose, unrestrictive clothes, comfortable sports shoes. He loves jeans, he has a whole collection of denim pants of different colors. The palette of his closet is more diverse than that First's, a lot of light colors, but mostly monochrome things. I wouldn't call them both fans of prints. His favorite clothes can be worn for decades until they fall apart into atoms :D There are a lot of old t-shirts with logos of his favorite rock bands in his closet. He also has some more formal classic clothes, but he doesn't really like to wear classics himself. Suddenly you can dig up some funny rainbow socks or a Christmas sweater with fucking reindeer that he bought for fun (he'll wear it).

In modern au Mortis is a mom of First and Second, a person like any other. She's been wearing classics since her youth, though her styles used to be looser, with more soft flowing fabrics, airy sleeves, and light natural colors. Now the materials are denser, darker, and there are more sharp straight lines in the silhouette. She wears both long pencil skirts and pantsuits. Her image invariably includes black sunglasses because of photophobia, a special sensitivity of the eyes to light. Her eyes themselves are dark brown. With age, Mortis has moved away from loose hairstyles with long hair and prefers to tightly gather her hair up. She does not cover her gray hair. She loves beautiful vintage clothes, but rarely wears them as it is more of an informal style for her, when she wants to flaunt something special. But she doesn't refuse vintage jewelry even in everyday outfits. In makeup she likes a thick tone and lipsticks of deep plum shades. (The Devil Wears Prada has already been mentioned under the sketch with her, but I was inspired by Chanel and Karl Lagerfeld in particular.)

Ghost dresses like a Pinterest girl. She likes cute prints with cartoon characters, cropped tops, short shorts, but sometimes she wears oversize. She's actually cold quite often, so she dresses in layers when she goes outdoors. Usually doesn't wear chains, but loves all kinds of earrings and rings. Went through her gothic era as a teenager, which still sometimes echoes in her style. Ghost dyes her hair often, she is brunette herself, but can change her hair color every season. She went with split, multi-colored ends, hidden coloring, even rainbows. But later from the bright nuclear colors moved to more muted. She doesn't always touch up her roots in time and often walks around with the top of her head in her own color. In makeup she prefers a light tone, almost does not use lipsticks and shadows, but likes tints and fruit glosses, only draws arrows with eyeliner.

While First and Second are fairly restrained in their overall appearance, Ghost and Mortis can be lowkey overdressed at times.

First is very similar to Mortis both on the vibe and appearance, but when he's told how he looks like his mother he flies into the stratosphere on the ass exsplosion, because they have a very strained relationship in this au, but I'll tell you more about it another time. First's addiction to cigarettes, by the way, is also from her. Second used to be a heavy smoker too, but then he quit. As for the height in this au, the guys are still very tall 6'1" to 6'3" (185-190cm) and take after their mom, who is also about 6'1" (185cm). Ghost is the same average height as in canon, just under 5'7" (170cm).

I am going to draw Modern AU in black and white/monochrome style, but for color reference I wanted to make a collage. Ghost has green eyes and dyed hair. First is strangely not black-haired, it's them in postmortem he got fucked up. While Second... I still don't understand what kind of gray-brownish hair color it is, but they're kinda such an obscure ash-brown. In postmortem he got a decent gray. But they all have pretty natural hair colors.

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oddly enough, Second likes to gossip even a little more than First. the thing is, First is quite comfortable discussing and criticizing a person in their own presence. even more, there is nothing to stop him from doing it directly to their face, if he wants to.

Second, on the one hand, is more tactful and won't do that. on the other hand, this translates into the fact that it is not shameful for him to discuss a person behind their back. Second won't be blatantly toxic and denigrate someone, his gossip is more in the nature of the cringe news of the week. he discusses others to have fun and amuse himself, not to vent bile on anyone. First, of course, is not squeamish about such things either, but from himself will still add who is a whore, who is a slag heap, who is a faggot 💀

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I didn't think I'd ever write a whole fucking wall on this topic, but since it's such a thing…. You won't see this kind of detail in Tower canon.

First/Ghost horny headcanons in modernAU

(I've warned you, read on at your own risk)

First doesn't like foreplay, usually gets right down to business. He and Ghost are similar in that, they both have a fast pace. But First likes verbal flirting, talking before the process. For him foreplay is more about verbalism than tactility. If he doesn't get his brain going, he's gonna proceed with difficulty. Ghost, on the other hand, isn't much of a talker, and talking about such topics makes her very uncomfortable. But she loves sexting :'D She's the kind of person who chats like, oh yeah I'm like this and that, I’ll do everything, and then sits there like ahem 👉👈 First was always amused. So starting it all in a chat while he's on his way home is sacred. In general, sex in their relationship is a regular thing, although it is First who initiates it more often. He does not neglect force in the process, likes to twist hands and in general all kinds of fixation of the partner, preferably in a position that is not very comfortable for her. Not only because he is such a control freak to the bone, but also for ambivalent feelings. Pleasant in an unpleasant position. Plus and minus. Prefers only leading top positions, likes to be in control of the process from start to finish. Ghost is generally very following, so she is happy with this state of affairs. She prefers lower positions, likes to lie down with her legs spread and enjoy. First is very visual-oriented (this bitch loves to beg for nudes), likes to look at the partner from different angles, to see all the details, so he likes sex in good light. Ghost on the contrary likes languid twilight, aesthetics of silhouettes, darkness and blissfully cover her eyes. But First really needs eye contact, so he sometimes demands it, even when Ghost is no longer able to do so. Especially when she is unable to.

He is attentive to the emotional tone, not because he feels it well, but just the opposite, so he reads a person's condition by movements, pupil opening, breathing rhythm, and all sorts of little things. In such close physical contact, he notices the slightest changes, but often consciously chooses to ignore it. First likes moans and screams, when emotions are vividly shown, enjoys every sound (he himself is very reserved in bed, stone-faced even when he orgasms xD). He does his best to squeeze all the reactions out of Ghost without a trace, to get everything that is suppressed or hidden. In a pleasurable way or not so much. So he can purposely bring her to tears, he thinks it's an indicator of sincerity. I'd actually say he has a kink for crying during sex. And here they match again, because Ghost often cries from an overabundance of emotions and sensations. That is, she doesn't always cry because she feels bad, she can cry because she feels really good. Although First generally likes to bring her almost to hysterics and exhaustion, can slap her face to bring her to her senses. But Ghost is no slouch either and suddenly can respond in the same way, try to intercept the dominant position, put him down and sit on top. But, as a rule, this is just a game, in reality she doesn't need it and doesn't care. She wants to be dominated and subdued, First knows this. Their playfulness can look wild to outsiders, they may yell and growl at each other and it may look more like a wrestling match on the bed. First can drive Ghost to the state of a wildcat who is going on a rampage, not because she's angry or annoyed, but because she's overexcited. It turns him on, he likes to tame. Ghost likes it too, she lets her demons out and emotionally discharges in this somewhat unaccustomed way. In that respect, First gives them a lot of freedom, what to many might seem like a scary cringe to him is fucking great. ‘Release the kraken’. Ghost likes physical acts: choking, spanking, flogging, so she likes light pain. First's happy to organize it.

He's fucking turned on by humiliation and psychological domination. He would cry with happiness if Ghost stood on all fours naked and licked his shoes and called him master, but in this he and Ghost do not match lake at all, big no. Ghost doesn't tolerate psychological pressure and humiliation at all, for her it's too much, and she strangely enough refuses to give it to First. But because of this she gives him carte blanche to almost any physical action in bed, like, she likes light pain, but in case he is overzealous and crosses the line — she keeps silent and tolerates (Ghost doesn't fully understand for herself where this line is and doesn't always realize her own feelings. Especially in the midst of the process). But First sees this moment, sees when it goes from pleasure to discomfort and excessive pain for Ghost, but doesn't stop. First, because she herself lets him do it and keeps quiet. Second, he thinks it's only fair: if she's not giving him everything he wants in sex to the fullest extent, then he'll scoop to the bottom where it's "allowed." Unfortunately, Ghost thinks the same way. Well, third, he just genuinely gets high off of it because his sadistic nature hasn't gone anywhere.

So in some ways they're the same, in some ways they're not. They have different sexual temperaments, for example. First ideally needs to have sex every day, or even several times. Ghost is comfortable with a slightly more rare schedule, more like several times a week. But, of course, this is a very conditional schedule and a lot depends on the cycle, mood, stress level in life, etc. Ghost had never had a sexual partner before First, so he was her first in every sense, and partly set the standard for "how it should be". Ghost, of course, isn't exactly an uncomplaining doofus who agrees to anything, but she still didn't know many of the nuances and didn't have the experience to compare.

And lastly, Ghost's favorite position: lying down doggy style. First's favorite position: missionary with legs on shoulders.

First does indeed have a row of handcuffs hanging on the headboard in his bedroom. Where did they come from? Originally, it was just a joke at one of his house parties. The guests had brought a dozen fake handcuffs just for fun. It was no big deal, they had fun and forgot about it. For a while he was too lazy to clean it all up. A couple of times the handcuffs were used in bed and he liked the theme. He decided to keep them. Except that he replaced some of the handcuffs with real ones, which really couldn't be removed without a key. Besides, the metal was visually a good match for the cold style of his room. Over time, First noticed with interest that the rhythmic ringing of the chains calmed him for some reason.

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In fact, the first time Ghost and Second had seen each other had been by chance on the subway. Ghost felt the same strange inexplicable feeling as when she first saw First, but this time she ignored the feeling. It seemed like how could it be, but it was just like that. She was already in a relationship at that point and wasn't going to chase every man she met. Besides, the reoccurrence made her feelings not so overwhelming. She explained it all to herself as just a hormonal surge, it happens, the guy was cute-- But in the end she thought about that meeting all day long.

Second rarely rides the subway, he doesn't like the stuffy atmosphere of the metro, waiting for the train and then crowding in the car. Besides, he has a bike, but that day he had it serviced. Second was planning to go for a walk and who knows what drove him to the subway. When he saw Ghost, he genuinely wanted to meet her and get her number, he thought maybe that's why he was here. The stars aligned, who fucking knows? Though he thought it was some kind of cringe to get acquainted in the subway and while he was gathering his thoughts Ghost had already left the car. He mentally laughed at his hopeless romantic (and retarded) self and went on his way. "Not fate," he decided then, but this was not their last meeting.

What was their surprise when they ran into each other again at a party just a few days later.

In modern au they don't remember their other embodiments. It's not their previous lives or anything like that, but specifically an alternate universe. But as they looked into each other's eyes, they experienced what is known as a sense of deja vu. An irrational feeling as if they had met before. Even more, a feeling as if something invisibly connected them. But neither of them could explain it for themselves, so they kept their mixed impressions to themselves.

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2 — So, what do you see in her? 1 — I thought you had a good eye. 2 — No, well... She's a good-looking girl, no question about it. But I'm kind of interested in other things. You rarely stay with someone that long, you've even moved in together. I'm freaking out. 1 — Fuck knows. She’s fucking crazy =) 2 — Well, you're definitely the kind of person only a fucking crazy person would reach out. So, uh, what about this? She's a kid, isn't she? 1 — Oh, fuck, you should see what she's doing. A little girl, hahaha.... Remember yourself at that age. 2 — Oh fuck— 1 — xD 2 — Still, it's something. It's just... I don't know, bro. 1 — Than, she threw herself at me, please. 2 — So what? You're a grown-up, control yourself, for god’s sake. 1 — She's an adult, she's got her own head on her shoulders. She's a grown-up. Why are you making me look like a fucked up man? 2 — Because you're a fucking asshole. I hope our mother doesn't know about that at least. 1 — It's none of our mother's fucking business who I sleep with. 2 — Sleeping? I thought you guys were serious. 1 — Well. I like her. I guess. A lot. 2 — Ooh, "a lot"? You must be really into her. 1 — Fuck you =)

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Speaking about social media, Second doesn't really spend much time online, and neither does First. First sometimes spends time on Twitter, but mostly uses only messengers. Second has Instagram acc, it's open and has quite a lot of followers (well, you can understand why). He doesn't have many posts, he rarely posts anything, but if he does, it's almost always something blowing up :D Ghost never even had a chance to come across his profile before, because First has all his friends hidden in all his accounts, and he doesn't have insta at all. So Ghost just once asked the Second for his Facebook account, and from there she went to his Insta just for curiosity's sake. And lost her shit, of course, when looked at his profile. Well, Second is a handsome guy, he likes to take pictures, and most importantly he knows how to do it, so his account is aesthetically pleasing. 50% of the gallery, however, is selfies, but we are all not without sin. As for Ghost, she also has an instagram. Her profile is closed, she doesn't have many followers, but she has a lot of photos. Most of them are photos of interesting places or funny cute things she comes across. Although sometimes Ghost can post a sexy photo in a super open swimsuit just because she wants to. She has a couple of photos with First in her profile, but in general he doesn't like to be photographed and often doesn't let himself be in a shot. Ghost mostly sits on twitter and tiktok. She tried to persuade First to create a tiktok acc to send him videos, but he flatly refused. He said that he doesn't need any crap on his phone, and if she wants to show him something, she should come to him with a phone and show him in person. Ghost grumbled about it, but in the end she kept running to show him something. First usually defiantly rolls his eyes at her vids of dancing kitties, but is actually happy when she runs to him. He doesn't show it, but he is flattered by Ghost's attention and her desire to share something with him, no matter what it is.

G — I don't believe Than is your brother.... You're adopted for sure =D 1 — Huh? G — Have you seen his insta? Just look at this.... *shows him her phone* 1 — Oh fuck... Poser 🙄 1 — ...Are you following his insta? G — I just went to check it out. 1 — Mmm, napkins are in the kitchen if you need them. G — Fuck you, I didn't even subscribe to it. 1 — Why's that? It's inconvenient to go from bookmarks every time. G — Omg, why are you jealous? He's your brother. 1 — You can subscribe to whoever you want. I don't give a fuck. G — Mm, I see. Then I'll follow him. ———

I felt like bringing out the gastronomic headcanons in the modern AU, and why not.

First likes spicy greasy food. He doesn’t consider chicken/fish as meat and likes, you know, normal meat. He is the kind of person who will gladly eat meat stuffed with meat, some kebabs wrapped in fried bacon and all that kind of stuff. He has a good metabolism, he’s the kind of guy who will eat a lot of fucking food without gaining weight. He almost never eats vegetables. He doesn’t like sweets, he prefers sour foods. He mostly eats european food, but he likes spicy as fucking hell asian food. He won’t give up fast food. Favorite food: spicy barbecue ribs 🥩

Second has more versatile tastes, he likes meat, chicken, salads, seafood and pasta, so he mostly prefers Italian cuisine. He likes sweets, but limits himself in this, because sweets quickly make him gain weight. Plus Second likes to hang out in the gym, so in general he adheres to a varied, but moderate diet. So he is a gym bunny. Favorite food: pasta with shrimp 🍝

Ghost is a fan of Asian cuisine, she loves ramen and pho bo. In all Asian cuisine she chooses only what is not spicy or asks not to add spicy sauces. She loves seafood, and swallows everything that swims: from octopus to oysters (here I remember mermaid AU, where her gastronomic cravings were fully revealed). She prefers steaks rare and in general likes meat with blood. She has a terrible sweet tooth. Favorite dish: bibimbap 🍛

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Ghost plays better than both of them. She's more often playing something. Second is more inclined to games like heartstone or strategies, he plays just to relax and enjoy, in short, very chill about games. First used to play a lot of shooters, likes competitive games and generally PlayerVSPlayer, doesn’t play alone. But they both partially spend their time playing in the youth and now prefer other leisure activities. But Ghost, unlike them, plays a lot. Usually, she dives deep into games and thoroughly studies both lore and mechanics, but she also tends to choose PvP and prefers MMORPGs.

3 fav games:

I: Hotline Miami, Left 4 Dead, Postal

II: Hearthstone, Disciples, The Elder Scrolls

G: Genshin Impact, World of Warcraft, Hades game

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3 fav movies:

I: It (1990), Texas chainsaw massacre (1974), Begotten (1989) II: Tucker & Dale vs Evil (2010), Macbeth (2015), The notebook (2004) G: The skeleton key (2005), The witch (2015), Possession (1981)

3 fav music band:

I: Death in june, Shining, Satyricon II: Celldweller, Type o Negative, Summoning G: Lana Del Rey, Mylene Farmer, Evanescence

3 fav books:

I: The Emotional Plague of Mankind. The Murder of Christ (W. Reich), Worstward Ho (S. Beckett), The World as Will and Representation (A. Schopenhauer) II: Sonnets (W. Shakespeare), The Lord of the Rings (J.R.R. Tolkien), Karamazov Brothers (F. Dostoevsky) G: Dragons of Autumn Twilight (M. Weis, T. Hickman), Labyrinth of Reflections (S. Lukyanenko), Exquisite Corpse (Poppy Z. Brite)

#TowerOC #ModernAU #OC

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mesukita · 11 days

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[ Modern AU ] p2

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One day Ghost bought two tickets for an exhibition at a gallery she had long wanted to visit. She had planned to go with First, but he refused, because he had other plans for that day, and he wouldn't change them for the sake of visiting art places he had little interest in. Ghost didn't really want to go alone, and she had an extra ticket anyway, so she offered it to Second. He didn't refuse. Moreover, he had been to the exhibition before and was happy to be an impromptu guide. First is not prone to contemplation. You can discuss science, psychology, literature with him, but he isn't interested in art. Second, on the contrary, loves painting, although he isn't a great connoisseur. In this he and Ghost were alike and it immediately became a convenient topic of conversation. They were glad that they had something to talk about, because at first they had thought that they were too far apart in mental terms.

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A little about Ghost and her family.

Ghost is an only child and her parents aren't the worst. In general, her childhood was rather good: she was always fed, clothed and educated. But her mother is very strict and overprotective, and her father is a bit cold and indifferent. Her mother's attention was always too much and her father's too little. After all, she had to be home after six p.m. at the drop of a hat. Thoroughly checking homework all the way through high school, for C, D and F she got house arrest, for B – oppressive silent disapproval, and A is a given and not even worth paying attention to. Ghost hated studying. And she hated school, too. She was a quiet and calm child, somewhat aloof, and that's the kind of child other children don't like. That's why she was often "lightly" bullied in elementary school. No one dunked her head in the toilet, but there was plenty of mockery. Especially about her slanted eyes. After graduation, she lost touch with her few school friends and lacked socialization. Her parents insisted that she go to college for an industrial specialty. Ghost wanted to study music. She enrolled in an industrial college. She didn’t get a scholarship so her parents paid her tuition. After all, they wanted her to study there. They also give her money to live in a dormitory, which Ghost never actually lived in for a day. After the separation began, parental supervision decreased significantly. They saw each other only on weekends, and the phone calls were reduced. It was much easier to keep their boundaries at a distance, but Ghost had learned to keep a low profile without it. Her parents didn't know what she did in her spare time, what bothered her. Because they never wanted to know, because nothing was supposed to bother her, and in her free time she was supposed to stand like a doll in a box and look through plastic wrap, waiting for them to take her out and brag to the relatives, "Look at our quiet, calm, perfect daughter," as if to represent their parenting skills. All that remains is to start her up with the key and watch her walk in a perfect trajectory. And then First comes into her life and says, "Fuck the rules, fuck the honed trajectories. Nothing is true, everything is permitted." And Ghost is naturally blown away by the hurricane of new impressions and the feeling of mental freedom, and by this strange guy in a black car who is ready to take her to the end of the world, it seems. "Yeah, this isn't some pimply-faced skateboarding college classmates. That's it!" Ghost is proud of herself, very flattered by the attention of a grown man. Although she realizes that it's not something she should talk about. She doesn't have any close girlfriends, and her group at the college is almost all guys, and they are noticeably losing out against First. Her parents wouldn't approve of a fiancé on the horizon anyway. Especially since she lied to them about the dormitory and is actually living with him. And the longer this lie goes on, the more explosive the consequences of revealing the truth will be.

First advised her to tell them everything and come out in open conflict with them, saying how long can you tolerate and hide, show your teeth. But Ghost simply doesn't know how to conflict and stand in opposition, she has been taught all her life to be docile and go with the flow. That's why Ghost and First often have conflicts. Not about her parents, no, he had mentioned it a couple of times, but First doesn't want to get to know her family, so he didn't insist and the subject was quickly dropped. But Ghost's passivity manifests itself in many other things as well. On the one hand, Ghost's docile and compliant nature endears her to the First. She has been raised to be obedient and comfortable, and at some points this behavior makes him almost teary with pleasure. But on the other hand, her weakness and weak-mindedness sometimes irritate him. In some cases he has no problem taking responsibility and solving her problems, but everything has its limits. "I'm not her father, after all. She should be able to make her own decisions. She's an adult, for crying out loud." First treats Ghost like an adult, not a child. And on the one hand Ghost is very much attracted by this, but on the other hand she doesn't know how to be an adult yet. Her family just didn't let her learn it. Someone else always made the decisions. Sometimes First purposely pressures her to make decisions. He provokes conflict to force her to be aggressive so that she learns to let her anger out. He backs her into a corner on purpose so that she will attack him. To release the emotions she's used to repressing. Those emotions always come out of Ghost with a cry of relief, even if she doesn't realize it. Yes, First feeds on other people's reactions in a way, so the claim that he provokes for his own pleasure is also quite true. But in Ghost's case, there's an effective side effect to the way he's used to interacting with people. He genuinely believes he's helping her, even if she doesn't realize it herself. It's just that his ways are a bit unconventional.

– I put as much pressure on you as you can handle.

[ to be continued …]

#towerOC #OC #modernAU

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