poes-and-things

[poes-and-things]

the sun is out. it's 75 fahrenheit outside. i'm staying at my parents' house instead of my flat. i feel like i'm on holiday.

this is insane. my mood has gone up exponentially. i'm listening to Sham Rock and chugging proscco. this is wild.

#personal #positive vibes i guess

[poes-and-things]

"How do I stop being scared of-" You do it scared. The courage arrives WITH the action, not before it. Don't wait to feel confident before you act because the key to confidence is usually doing the thing while still scared as fuck

[poes-and-things]

i've grown up a bit, i think. or maybe it's working as a teacher, or being able to live aspects of my life the way i want to. i'm not sure, but i'm appreciating it.

i am so emotionally moved by the things humans can do. teenage love? wrecks me. little kids attempting to mimic language with sounds and tonal changes? wrecks me. a mother's love for her child? the way some spouses look at their partners? how dogs are obsessed with their owners? absolutely wrecked.

emotions are incredible and i think it's so important to slow down and observe them when you can. people are incredible. animals are incredible.

#random thoughts

[poes-and-things]

"ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ʙʀᴀᴠᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴏɴᴏʀᴀʙʟᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴋɪɴᴅ. ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴏᴍᴀɴ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ꜰᴏʀᴛᴜɴᴀᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇᴅ ʙʏ ʏᴏᴜ."

#annamis #i'm glad this is back on my dash #i forgot how beautifully these actors made this relationship #like fuck #the way they look at each other #the musketeers #aramis #anne

[poes-and-things]

also, i had a different conversation with a different friend last night about friendships with men (we're both cis women). as an ace, it's pissed me off to no end that society tells men and women that it's impossible to "just be friends" because someone is always romantically or sexually interested in the other. this line of thought has me second guessing my friendships from time to time, has other people "shipping" my friends with me regardless of how we actually feel about each other, and tends to lead to that friendship's demise.

my lovely friend last night is single for the first time in a while and has recently connected with an old friend of hers. they've been getting closer, and he's started using pet names to address her. she's now worried that he likes her romantically and/or sexually and doesn't know what to do. i asked her why pet names automatically mean they're interested in that way--i call my friends "love" all the time and it doesn't mean i want to date them. she waved that off, saying it's different.

so now she's panicked this man likes her and is trying to see whether or not she COULD like him. which is exactly how her last relationship started. and the one before that. and the one before that.

there was a point to this, but i can't remember what it is. basically, the straights need to stop ruining friendships and just because someone likes you doesn't mean you have to like them to keep them in your circle (if that's what you wish).

#asexual #friendships #society ruins far too many things for me to be chill with it #personal

[poes-and-things]

i had a chat with my friend the other day about red white and royal blue. she hasn't seen it yet, but wants to. and the conversation of queer sex on screen came up. for her, a pansexual (i think) cis woman, gay men having sex on screen for her is a bit odd--it doesn't do for her what hetero sex on screen or lesbian sex on screen does for her. and then her eyes widened as they connected with mine and she realized that how she feels about gay sex is how i feel about ALL sex: it's beautiful because we've attributed it to an act of love/affection/etc, but it's also odd because wth why do people do it.

it's nice to feel seen, even if sometimes it's only by her.

#asexuality #sex scenes in media #personal

[poes-and-things]

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading

#let's talk about love #it's really good so far #asexual romance

[poes-and-things]

[poes-and-things]

it’s always “oh you’re writing? when will you be published and famous??” and never “oh you’re writing? come sit down and talk to me about every aspect of it unprompted for 6 hours”

[poes-and-things]

ha I was rereading some of my old stories from high school and early college and DAMN. There were so many signs of my asexuality. So so many. I wish younger me had figured this out a bit sooner, just for her sake.

#asexuality #writing #personal

[poes-and-things]

listen. aging into your thirties rocks. yes your joints get a little creaky. yes you can’t sleep in a pretzel on the floor anymore after a concert or a convention. and you lose some friends. but the thing is that you sort out who your real friends are and you sort out who you really are. and you get to see your friends settling into careers they like, and adopt new dogs and cats, and you find a job you can stand, and get really good at arts and crafts, and maybe that book you loved as a kid gets a movie deal and it doesn’t suck, and you learn to like new food and bake your own bread, and you realize that the great portfolio of self harm scars you all used to curate are going white with age and not updated, and half your friends are a different gender now and so much happier and maybe you are too, and you know who you are, and that it’s a journey and not a revelation. it’s a direction you’re headed, and you’re enjoying the trip.

reaching your 30′s rocks. and i’m hearing good things about what comes next, too.

[poes-and-things]

+ put your rationale in the tags

#it's best to go to bed clean #plus showers relax me more than baths do #so taking a shower in the evening makes me relaxed

[poes-and-things]

I've been questioning some things lately that have been taking a toll on different aspects of my life. I've learned that most of what I'm questioning has been a source of self hate for a long, long time. Which isn't said to garner sympathy or whatever, but to put into perspective how difficult the last couple years have been.

As a writer, it's been so hard not creating. It pains me that I wrote a book 3 years ago and have done nothing with it or created anything new since. But I recently realized that my stories are like horcruxes (minus the negative side effects) in that I put a piece of myself into the main character/plot line. I always have and I probably always will. But in questioning a lot of parts of myself and realizing I've hated certain aspects of myself for so long, I'm unwilling to provide pieces of myself in payment for a plot line or a character. Which means I haven't written in so long. So. Long.

I don't know how much longer my questioning stage is going to last, but I know I can only take the writing hiatus for a bit longer before I lose my shit. Something's gotta break and I hope to god it's not me.

#personal #figuring shit out #therapy is wonderful #i highly recommend it #but fuck does it suck losing things that were pieces of you #writing

[poes-and-things]

#i want a flaming arrow shot into my canoe holding my lifeless body

[poes-and-things]

[poes-and-things]

Who the Hell Is This Person Talking to Me and How Exactly Are They Related to Me: The Chart, just in time for your Thanksgiving gathering.

(Source: Apparently commenter “Platypus Man” from this Lifehacker post)

#family tree #genealogy

[poes-and-things]

There are certain kinds of language “mistakes” that are really good, actually.

Today, I asked a 14-year-old to tell me about her country (China).

She came out with the sentence, “Beijing is the capital city and Xi Jinping is the….. um………….. capital person!”

Clearly, she didn’t know the word for president or leader in that moment, but she knew exactly how to use the vocabulary she had to communicate her point.

Years ago, when I was living in Wuhan, there was a snow flurry. I hadn’t taught my second grade class weather words yet. We were doing a unit about food and drinks in the fridge. A kid, who didn’t know the word for snow, pointed to the window and said, “Outside is… refrigerator…. water bottle.”

Anyway, those are the kinds of kids whose English abilities will function in any situation, whether they’ve learned the words and grammar to deal with it or not. Those are the kids who could know literally ten words of any language and somehow make it work for them.