#'....alright fine you can have a little'

[journey-to-the-attic]

My guess would be that, at least part of, the reason IK throws the stuff is to see how well it would do against a predator. Since throwing solid objects is the main method of defense for a slugcat.

Also, Ik would show up with the rat and the others would probably have to stop her from eating it because of slugcat instincts for survival say "smells like food, is probably food."

And what's that? Levi feels bad about playing Rain World because he dies a bunch?

Sure would be a shame... if he were to find out the lore that makes every single one of those deaths technically canon :)

on her first morning in the devildom ik discovers a carton of eggs in the kitchen, and also discovers that while they are not particularly harmful ammunition, it does make the large loud creatures go "ARGH WHAT THE HELL" when she pelts them with them. even once she trusts them it amuses her so much that she keeps doing it as long as there are eggs in the house

there's a grace period between ik first arriving with the rat and barbatos just withering wherein he just stands there horrified and ik just looks at him innocently like o w o? then BANG he is out cold. while everyone else is panicking about that ik just sloooowly shuffles away (still clutching the rat) and lucifer has another dog-trying-to-eat-something-it-shouldn't moment "NO. PUT THAT DOWN. IT ISN'T FOR YOU"

i feel like he'd have a lot of pet dad moments in general. he'll be making dinner and he has to keep gently shoving ik away like "no. not for you. not good for you." while ik just gives him the biggest saddest pleadingest eyes ever

also oo lore?? (insert that eyes emoji) i can't find a good concise explanation of it but it conjures the image of levi with his head on the table just in tears "your story's so saaad" meanwhile ik is idly pawing at his headphone wire, hoping that this time he will let her eat the aquarium gravel

#answering asks #anon asks #jtta aus #slugpup ik #also in terms of ik bothering lucifer in the kitchen #he's the only one who doesn't give in immediately if ik wants something #(satan in particular will give in BEFORE ik has even started begging) #sometimes the thing she wants is genuinely dangerous or inedible though #ik remains equally upset. what do you MEAN you won't let her have a little bit of Pot Of Boiling Water #lucifer in particular has these little exchanges with her and it's like trying to be diplomatic with a toddler #you can walk past the kitchen and hear them on any given day when lucifer has meal duty #'no put that down you can't have it. it's raw' #'waa' #'it's not good for you' #'waaa :(' #'don't look at me like that i'm protecting your health' #'waaaa >:((' #'you can't have that either. you've had too many treats today' #'waaaaaa.......' #'....alright fine you can have a little'

[plulp]

IM NOT A DOCTOR BUT I THINK I MIGHT BE ABLE TO HELP

#my art #dol #harper the doctor #HIIIIIIIIIIII HI EVERYONE 👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋 #its a little bit off so that makes me kinda upset :( but ill figure something out. it might be the colors :( #or maybe the spacing? i left a lot in the top left :( but its fine #and im going to use every lyric of that song for every harper piece i make so that i dont have to think about making captions okay? #but HERE. a HARPER PIECE YOU CAN REBLOG #i give them the stupid messy sidebun because its cute. to me. #im so sorry about the radio silence but i DID warn you all i get artblock often #but!!!!!! i was also accepted into a zine despite my lack of internet presence :) so ive also been busy with that and other stuff too #accidentally made this while practicing for the piece because i couldnt get the style right :( but hopefully ill get a better hold on it #anyways. harper is not a doctor and i love them so much it makes me sick #harper my EVERYTHING. hes my PRINCESS. #MY ANGEL. #i want you all to remember this isnt just an art blog. its a harper fanblog #ohhh but i do have a few few few announcements to make in my next post okay? so dont ignore it alright? kiss kiss love you #IM GONNA BE FUCKING SICK HES HOLDING THE SYRINGE WRONG. AND I CANT FIX IT NOW BECAUSE ITS BEEN RBED

[front-facing-pokemon]

#linoone #but you wouldn't be able to tell without the tag. dear lord that nose #i love this one. not for the pokémon just for the front-facing image. LOOK at this dude. that Fucking Snout. you can BARELY see their EYES #it's wonderful. this is wonderful. this is amazing. i love this #i don't have a lot to say about linoone. i don't like it as much as zigzagoon but i kinda get what they were going for? zigzag to a line #but eeehhh. it's kinda just a ferret a little bit. what is it supposed to be actually? lemme check its like. dex category #it's the “rushing pokémon” that's not helpful at all. what's galarian linoone #oh it's the same. WELL ALRIGHT i guess. this dooms me to have nothing interesting to say here. check it out it's linoone!! #i wonder if this is anyone here's favorite pokémon. if any of you out there are a linoone reading this i'm sorry i don't have more to say #but rest assured i've had less insightful comments about some pokémon before so it's totally fine i think

[artistocrazy]

Needed to draw the bastard in a villainous pose.

You’re welcome 💜

#hetalia #hws austria #POV it’s 1815 and you’re watching a little Corsican beg for mercy #Really it’s more like ‘negotiations are so tiresome - I have not had a break in 30 years - can we just get back to business as usual?’ #’Yes alright fine you can play country but run it all by me first‘ #’oh okay sure - new name - whatever - you’re still under the empire’ #’is it 18:00 yet? Can I go home now? Daddy wants to play some of the new tunes - Tchaikovsky’s new pieces are waiting for me’

[tomatoluvr69]

What’s up tumblr hope you had a super fun leap day. sparkle on. big news my first seed start sprouted while I was at work ✨

#might have to change the url bc I’m in my collard era lol #my day was alright #I ate some shrimp curry that I’d accidentally left out all night and was fine bc I’m a scavenger of a person #then bc I started to feel PMDD fatigue I laid in bed with great elan til my shift started #then I spilled coffee all over my work clothes bc I stuck it in a very sketchy travel mug someone left in our house at the last party #and I listened to Screamin Jay Hawkins on the ride to work which was fun #work was a bit chaotic but uneventful and got to spend a huge chunk of it outside #it seems I have way better ball control than I did when I was a kid. whyyy now. i was such a loser I could have used some athleticism #but I’m so glad it’s the weekend so I can go palliative care mode which is what I call my lizard brumation pmdd phase #and stopped by a friend’s house after work which was nice #really rejuvenating #then made a sort of weird frittata w/ beets peppers and potatoes bc I was too tired to actually cook #watched sense and sensibility 1995 and really liked it although I found myself wishing for a bit more anguish. sorry #and I think I might set out one of the frozen almond croissants to proof overnight so I can bake it for bfast tomorrow #will go for a very short swim but probably only about 30 min bc of aforementioned fatigue. then pick up yogurt and a silly little treat #and will have ****** and **** for dinner either tomorrow or Saturday which will be nice #but really hoping Saturday because **** **** ** **** lol #and then Sunday I’m trepidatious about because **** was like what are you doing Sunday and I’m like well I guess having a fraught and #difficult conversation about our dynamic! lol #I’m very lucky to have proactive friends who are good communicators. truly I do not deserve his kindness. but like. god. let me retreat and #lick my wounds! #i shan’t get into it. but just know I know how S&G felt #and then another work week but I’m starting to really get a feel for the routine and what works and what doesn’t #and I’m excited for my next few meal preps we got millet and kale gratin #and a Lebanese chickpea dish the name of which unfortunately escapes me atm #but my mouth is watering thinking about it. saw a vid and was instantly influenced and went to the pantry to see if I had the stuff and I #dooooooooooo #and I do feel like I’m beginning to get past the worst of [event] and its sadness

[procrastinationaccount]

I'm going to lose my fucking mind

#For context: I was going to make a post complaining about how lesbians don't have enough good musical theater duets #(like we have the love songs from 'The Color Purple' which're alright but doesn't match the passion or desperation present in the book imo #'Changing My Major' which is a great love song but doesn't hit that sweet duet spot #'Dance With You' and the last verse of 'You Happened' from The Prom are sweet but the girls barely get to actually sing about each other #Honestly 'Oh Well' from Love In Hate Nation comes closest to what I want but it ends on a bittersweet note unless you see the show live #If only Elphaba and Glinda were canon... #But anyway. I can't believe that there's an adaptation of The Color Purple coming in the year of our lord 2023 and this is #how they're talking about Shug Avery. Her *role model*. Lock up your *husbands*. Ick. Pfaff. #I mean they're going to be gay. You can't get around that. But Shug is the love of her life. Can we please talk about that in the character #Don't mind me I'm just over here overreacting #From what I've read one of the biggest adaptational changes in the musical is her reaction to Shug's affair. #Like in the book Shug is the one light in her life. I sobbed myself to sleep over her nosedive in self-worth when they took a break #In the musical she's just...fine with it? I get why that's more satisfying emotionally but I still think it undermines their relationship #I don't get the curse thing either. I'm a little fuzzier on this part but in the book doesn't she just leave him and she's able to thrive? #Then when he asks her to get back together she's able to just know that the worst with Shug or alone is better than the best with him? #This book man. I hate that there isn't an adaptation as devoted to the Celie/Shug relationship as the book is. #Hate that the only recommendation I've seen calling it a sapphic book was from someone who thought that Celie's letters were to her lover #I remember watching this steamy adaptation of a Shakespeare play in soph Eng and seething because they only kiss once in the 1985 movie #Ig I can't expect too much from 1985 but...it was in the book! It was one of the most important parts! They don't even live together in it! #This was all to say I wast a lesbian 'Green Green Dress' a lesbian 'Home' a lesbian 'Natasha & Anatole' a lesbian Legally Blonde finale #The list goes on #I'm sure The Color Purple (2023) will be a good adaptation and movie. I will not pop blood vessels while watching it. #Maybe I should just avoid press releases and the movie will surprise me in a good way.

[cherrymoonvol6]

.

#i finished binging the she-ra show #and it was fine? this is what people are so angry about? #i think catra's redemption was well setup and made sense #and while i still like the catra adora romance i wish there was like... more of it #here are some gripes i have tho #1) glimmer's decision at the end of s4 feels like it has no consequences #like for starters i'm annoyed that the issue ended being incredibly black or white and it zapped out the nuance of the respective decisions #but she's like alright i was completely wrong and after bow forgives her it's like... ok surely more people would have Opinions about this? #but no they don't. missed opportunity #but the problem in shows like these (idk if it's different outside western animation) is that there's no budget to deal with-- #--cities and kingdoms having people. which makes them feel like shells that have little substance beyond being a narrative device #and yes everything in a show/piece of media IS a narrative device but you know. you gotta hide that. that's the beauty of media #but like... there's a universe where glimmer's subjects saw the consequences of her actions and rose against her. that woulda been fun! #2) adora's conflict in the finale of ohhh i have to Fulfill my Destiny(TM) comes so out of nowhere. esp when she had been against the-- #--whole destiny angle for the previous four seasons. suddenly she's burdened with it and it's clear that it's a way to isolate adora #but it's SO sloppily done and there's no buildup to it #and 3) woulda like if they did more with the first ones. there's a lot of potential there and maybe a more natural way of isolate adora #like have her have this crisis of 'there's no one here who can fully understand me' and i thought that was what they'd do with the-- #--cat creature they introduce in S5? but just ends up being catra's magic animal sidekick #idk there was a lot there to investigate. bow's dad could've been a good resource to make that happen too #uhhh that's it mostly? #at the end of the day this kind of western animated shows feel so pandering to kids. very formulaic and simple #tho i do respect that the show followed through the worst outcome in almost every occasion #(that's why catra compells me.... talk about a character who makes the worst decision at every point. she's just like me fr fr) #but yeah it was cute #i also like how bisexual the show felt at all times (except the ending where they were like ok monogamy is the goal but eh) #cute show. fun characters. easy 7/10 #catradora good #not great but eh #no show can give me compelling couples to obsess over (except for skam españa i guess)

[psalmsofpsychosis]

after my ✨️third✨️ attempt in the past 4 days to expose myself to standup comedy and build my lukewarm-jokes survival muscles i'll hereby conclude that jesus christ i'd rather fucking die

#like yes i'm sure there are actual funny standup comedians out there but #you people laugh at this shit?????? #98.99% of standup comedy culture is quite frankly incomprehensible to me i've never not-laughed at something this hard #i love george carlin but then again i watch him for sociopolitical commentary not for laughing #a lot of standup comedians are really just. extremely angry and frustrated borderline hateful people #or people with 45 accumulated years of severe depression which i mean. is absolutely fine to me #like the way i want to sit the lot of these people down and go ''talk to me. You're alright; you dont need the subpar 3.5/10 #socially acceptable veneer of jokes you can afford to have 2.5 seconds of sincere unscripted rage. maybe even cry a little. #you can do this i believe in you; cmon lets go'' #like these people are.... insanely unfunny. as a funny clown with funny shoes i find stand up comedy abhorrent honestly. #no offence whatsoever to people who like it; i know 'funny' is very a very subjective experience #i just think that the funniest people alive are often people who dont directly aim for being funny; it's got a medusa curse #the moment you look at funny directly you become the unfunniest person on the planet #(i adore hannah gadsby too but again. watching for sociopolitical commentary not for fun) #oh and i've been thinking about Joker's business of being ''funny'' too; pretty damn sure my experience of mainstream ''funny'' #is gonna play into that. oof

[katierosefun]

[stumbles out of my room, bloodied and gasping for air] halfway done with my fuckign memo

#caorline talks #guys. you know what's fuckign hilarious. IT'S NOT EVEN GRADED #but the thing is. my professor is going to read this and know that i wrote it #so i can't fuck around #my law practice professor is my favorite professor and she looked me dead in the eye and was like #'caroline how are you' #and i said 'i'm fine' #and she went ':) are you lying to me right now :)' #and i was like '.. . . . ma'am?' #'are you. lying to me. right now? :)' #'. . . . . i'm about as fine as i can be' #so like. NOW. i am like 'GOD I CANNOT DISAPPOINT THIS PERSON' #mentally. i am jim kirk lying bloody and beaten up on a bar table #and my professor is pike tilting their head at me and going 'you alright there?' #fun fact: i have. in fact. once shown up to class partially hungover. #but by partially hungover. i felt partially drunk still. #and you could tell because i was raising my hand more often. #which. maybe that's a problem i should look into #but i won't look into it today! #even yesterday i hung around class for a little longer to ask a question #and my professor knows. i am bad at asking questions or i'll let everyone ask their thing first #and so she was just like ':))) caroline :))) go ask your question :)))' #me: OkAY. okay okay #which is very nice of her i don't think other professors would care #but like. JESUS CHRIST #DO YOU SEE THE PROBLEM I AM IN

[alildritten]

Ah yes, the scariest story of all:

G A Y

(/j)

#alright time for context in the tags!! your favorite show!!! yippee! #yeah so anyway basically i was thinking up fictional scenarios with my ocs (of course as always) #and i was thinking about hey! so what about this werewolf character. yknow? silver? what if we thought about when they were a little kid #and stuff. you know? why not and all and so i was having fun with that thinking about how theyd have had to keep their werewolf-ness #a secret. but their parents know and are trying to keep it a secret as well and what-not #and one day silver gets invited to a sleepover. yknow. at night. theyre a werewolf??? that wouldnt go well #other than the fact that they can control that wolf form?? (i need to figure out what to call it) #so itd be fine but its supposed to be a secret because if people knew silver would be reported to the authorites because in that universe #humans do exist they just kicked any weird hybrid or beast or whatever off onto another planet #jokes on them the little beasties are doing fine and after a bit of adjusting and working on fitting into the new world #that theywere forced onto with no way back #they have a whole civilization and are doing great!!! but everytime that the humans on their world realize someones like. a werewolf or #a vampire or anything. WELP BYE-BYE HAVE A NICE TRIP #and well theres a new orphan in town on the other world! well heck hopefully they live alright and maybe get adopted? #BUT ANYWAY OFF TRACK WHOOPS so basically silvers parents are like ‘no. you cant’ but silver’s friends had asked several times in the past #and really wanted to have a sleepover with silver. idk and so basically silver writes a note saying ‘hey i did go sorry bout that- #dont worry i got it covered i can keep my wolf formt hing hidden no worries’ or something basically says that and goes to the sleepover #(friends think silver finally got permission) and wow i just realized this is a long story heck lemme try and shorten a little #and eventually at one point they all wanna tell scary stories cause why not #and once i got there my brain kinda kept pausing and then swoosh new train thought woahh!! #and started thinking about a cute scenario about two ocs of mine who are VERY GAY hehe <3 #but i thought it was a bit funny because i realized that i was about to have some lil kids tell each other scary stories and then woop brain #go hey think about this cute gay scenario!! so ah yes. cute gay scenario=SCARY (/j) #does this even make any sense at all i genuinely dont know but i had fun talking about ocs so yea ima sleep now #have a good day/night to you!!! <333 YIPPEE anyway bye bye goodnight bla bla bla woohoo

[seithr]

rl chatterin in tags, dont worry about it just feel like talking about recent stuff. for those who dont care look at this birdthang i won on xiv then. my silly big bird..

#i dont owe explanation to anyone yeah i kno but i was going through something kinda rough the last little while and wanted to disappear #idk if it was at all noticeable but i feel like acknowledging it is healthier than feeling embarassed pretending i was Totally Fine. #alas im back and im... still just gona post on as normal. i can enjoy my Own Circle Of Enjoyment because im allowed to enjoy parts of life #even if i felt like utter death it doesnt mean i have to drag myself back to it once im finally crawling out. #it doesn't mean it didn't happen. doesn't mean it didn't hurt. but i dont have to reopen the wounds to prove something yknow. #i want to be alright and I will take these. when i feel i want to be happy i should not deny the pleasure of messaging friends #or little joys of any kind no matter how 'insignificant it is' next to my real stresses. you have to have something you smile about #and when you're ready to again why try and put it off? anyways. no idea if this makes sense. im tired but good i think. #i have to give myself little hype up shounen talks about joys and loves and life sometimes. its just gonna happen. #armour clanking #however i AM allowed to feel a little shy talking and being honest again so this is scheduled . hello. gootbye. ya boy hanging on 👍 #possibly employed boy at last even. probably contributed to getting better was that hope. ok no more sharing for real GOODNIGHT (MORNING)

[evakant]

my life's one long string of "surely i won't be alive next year" and then i wake up one day and it's a year later and, what do you know, i'm still alive

#funny how that works. #besides. actually. it's one long string of 'surely i won't be alive next year so why work towards something or choose something. i'll just #fossilize here when the time comes' and yeah like i said one year later and i am not even on step one of becoming a fossil #i can't fossilize because i am stagnating. that makes me a swamp. #as a note i am not suicid/al i just think being alive is a bother and i didn't ask for it and if i had a choice i wouldn't have said yes #but not in a kms kind of way just in a surely this can stop now way #in a 'okay this isn't funny anymore and hasn't been for a while way' #listen idk how to explain it just know i'm good and not at risk and #making silly little text posts is basically old timey doctor putting leeches in my brain to fix this #you know bloodletting! #i shouldn't post this i'm drafting it lmao #negativity / #suicide mention / #just in case #edit: that one post from before reminded me i had this in my drafts and yeah! lmao love it love the swampiness of it all #if you read this at all (you shoulnd't) but if you do and are worried despite me saying i'm fine: #genuinely truly really i am okay! i don't need to be cheered up i don't need help of any sort! i'm alright! #and i can bet you i'll still be alive next year! let's all meet up on this post one year from now <3 #fra.txt

[fish-and-forbear]

I think I am doing okay, here.

I wish so many things could have been different. My heart aches for it. But I wouldn't have found my voice, otherwise, nor would I have met so many wonderful people and creatures.

I wish the other one would worry less. It's very silly to realize he thought I was the panicked one... now I've organized my mind and honed my edge, and he's the one who keeps feeling down...

I don't entirely understand why... life is very good. Everyone is getting a little better. It aches because I can feel it like a physical creature clawing in the skull, and whispering all of the misery in this world, the atrocities, the tragedies, the possibilities of so many things ending, or of getting hurt or worse for who he is. And being afraid for the people he cares about...

But that doesn't help us sleep right now. It doesn't change that tomorrow morning the sun will rise and we don't have work and we could do anything, within reason of course.

I'm not sure. Maybe I am the stupid one for being so positive. But one of us has to be, now.

Maybe it's just my instincts waking up again. It's so easy to throw my aching heart and memories away when someone I care about needs me. And right now, once more, we just need to rest.

Nothing bad is even happening! We had a nice day. We talked to friends, we played a game and lost track of time because it was so much fun. I liked that game and the name is appropriate, Loop Hero. Ironic but fitting! We helped a friend feel better after a nightmare. And now it's OUR turn to rest.

Nothing is wrong. Everything is alright. Many big steps forward this coming week. I feel his worry creeping into my heart too, but there's no need for it. We were brave and confident before, we can be that way again. :)

- Grist

#system journaling #see I can remember what words I need to use...! Sometimes. #I think I made him sad because my friends have their own blogs now and I immediately wanted to look at them #he let me but it just made him upset. But why? I chose to unfollow. He felt better after that. Why worry? #I am familiar and content with friendships between firey souls that do not last very long. #Better to rest them down gently. You should always leave friends at least a little bit better than you found them #If I did that then I am happy :) #I just wish he would believe me that it's alright... I know who I am... even if other people see me as a mistake that's fine #I've been around too long to care too much about that. Even from my own family. Trauma makes long bonds difficult #Sometimes when they are healed they can rekindle but..... foresight is a gift and a curse for these things. Better to let them go entirely #than hold onto what isn't there. #... I think he needs to talk to his friend again. The one that lives here. #I think he needs closure that these things are alright. After all that was 8 years and they are so much happier now :) #Hmm. This is getting long #I will let it rest. The heart is already a little softer and everything is less tense. His memory is AWFUL and he can never remember what I #talk about on my own but hopefully he will see that I am content and stop worrying so much about me. And focus more on better things #like making my damned music list like he keeps saying he will! But that is a joke to make him laugh :) There is never any rush.

[shirtshawaiian]

love wins

#now ive decided theyve got a forbidden romance . but just this once they can enjoy a moment together. immortalized by picture #alright i guess i have lore with my bedroom now. ahem #right now: that pigman is my boyfriend pigman. and that gnome is his boyfriend #thats the giant gnome the biggest of his group. so they all look up to him for leadership #especially after the loss of a recent couple (i took them to my office) #(theyre having a wonderful time there currently i left my beanie behind on one. sorry ot him) #so this gnome this big guy new and fresh to the room is like. lost #but my pigmans got him. (i am fine with this of course) #in fact im the wingman . my pigman boyfriend and his boyfriend the gnome #unfortunately they are Separated as the gnome must live life upon my windowsill and the pigman in my bed.............................. #maybe i'll take more pictures of them together they make me very happy #its not inherently any wars or anything its just... separated by distance. and the giant gnome feels as though his little gnome pals #might not like his relationship with the pigman #simply due to lack of gnome and plush relationships in my room #the only thing close to that is my furby and my sucklet who are on an on-and-off relationship immortalized by some instagram posts #there is lego mothman and lego steve's skeleton too i guess but theyre both legos. they wouldnt understand. also theyre in a bit of a rough #patch in their relationship since mothman crashed the car after hooking up with steve in a bar. you know what i mean? #maybe i should clean my room. add environmental storytelling. hmmm

[munamania]

sorry bitterness consumes the soul etc etc <33 i will say though. depending on what is going through her head this could all be really fucking cruel lmfao

#like. alright. idk if she Knows i have feelings for her but given the whole blocked stories thing and whatever like. who knows #what bf said. and whether she is or was at any point genuinely confused or something because she does like him but we. hit it off. and it #was all just a Lot. like that doesn’t give the excuse for the times when it felt like she was sorta.. leading me on. yk. though maybe i was #truly delusional and stupid last semester i don’t know. maybe she just also enjoys talking to me on a friendly level and that’s fine and all #but it’d be really weird if she like. also refuses to acknowledge me outside of class? or anything like that.. #or like. basically was just using me to stroke her ego in that sense if she does Know. like that would be shitty #would i like to be friends sure do i think this would absolutely crush my soul probably. #and i’d like to say ohh i don’t think she’s doing xy or z but i truly don’t know her. you know. beyond the little bits #of time we’ve had to talk about our lives and whatever #and anyway. it is stupid that i’ve spent so long trying to guess at what’s on her mind cause i’ll never know unless you know. #we’re ever close enough that we can talk about it or. whatever. #so. i definitely think when i see her again i’m going to take any chance i can to say something about last semester. um yk. in a way that #makes sense i’m not just insane. though i do hope that i can subtly make boyfriend seem really paranoid and weird. sorry. lol. but he was! #honestly if i were hitting on her or trying to make a move i’d understand him being like that but i was polite and friendly #so he has no business getting involved in my personal feelings! yeah i #don’t like him yeah i have feelings for his gf but you get what i mean i’m not. Trying to be an asshole here. #do i wish they’d break up? if she’s not happy. but am i going to like literally be a homewrecker? obviously not again who knows #if i even have the sway to. SORRY i’m being soooo insane one thing about me i can talk about a topic #a million times. anyway. #i just hope it’s not insane emotional manipulation or anything on anyones part i don’t know. #we have a really easy banter so i think it’ll be easy enough to talk to her and then hopefully. have a little bit more clarity as to where #we stand. yk. #abby talks #might delete this later if i decide i’m being a little tooooo 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 #i guess what i’m trying to say is. because this isn’t all the clear and obviously it’d be fine if we’re just friends. but the way we #interact is a little. idk. like we tease each other a lot and it’s like girl idk u tho… i’m having fun but huh?

[strwbrymlkshake]

I wanna post about my recovery + ramble in tags at the same time but I'm not motivated enough to come up with a mediocre yandere post rn , so just know that my life is going?? Somewhat good in terms of romance

#mine #💿 #i can only ramble in tags. posts feel too official im shy</3 i feel like tags are less likely to show up on search engines as well... #just forever paranoid about the blog being discovered you know how it goes. personal stuff (proceeds to post it online) #in the general scheme of things im doing alright. tho im currently obsessed with a game instead of a man so idk if that counts #feels like im just waiting for an important event to happen. like ill have a great life changing thing but rn im just in limbo. waiting! #i dont mind it because i take joy in the small things in my day to day life but i feel like i should be doing bigger things. doing more #hell. BEING more. theres lots of cookie cutter paths i could take but none of them fit the mould im making yk. its boring. #on one hand im proud of myself for being able to stay focused on my interests instead of wasting time on a guy who doesnt care abt me #like i still am doing that a Little Bit but its not as detrimental to my daily life as it used to be. like its fine now #on the topic of.. him. we dont really talk much but i feel theres sort of a weird air between us now and he could tell i was in the yanzone #im not too broken up about it because i repeatedly told myself this would happen n i knew it would but everythings okay as it is rn #i still do admire him but not as intensely. the moment he stops hinting at even the possibility he could be interested my attention drops #i want to be everything but at the same time i want to be nothing. i want to be god and the earth and the sun and death and disease. #im working up to being perfect but at the same time i know no such thing exists so meanwhile im just. working up. to SOMETHING #i want everyday of my life to be an adventure. at the same time im much too tired for that. guess thats why i stick with emotional trifles #im not in love with him or anything. its the same as everyone else. like various dials in a lab that i have to keep below 50 #or else bad things will happen. like a scientist with anxiety. its like i be insane for a little while and the dial goes down #but any others could easily skyrocket because i find little things i adore about one person and latch onto them!!! like art #i feel im the most socially acptble level of yandere out of them all rn. in insanity specifically tho. in othr aspects im still weird #the power of autism is condemning me from learning proper social skills but by god i am TRYING my hardest n learning new things #i sit around waiting but atleast im building skills while doing it. part of what life is about i guess! #you come for the yandere content and then i just post philosophical rants. a tragedy most awful to those who can relate #but im okay with it as long as these strange lengthy rambles help me recover better!! no problem at all. one day i will be better #tl;dr i havent found love yet but im not miserable either. trying to improve myself through numerous mental quarrels n experience