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#(i'm p sure the fact that i included links means this will stay out of the main tags)
tamelee · 1 year
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Hey, how are you doing? (✿◠‿◠)
On the vote thing, why do they want that kind data? Like if you're male/female plus your age? It's a bit weird. And they allow spam voting as well... it seems I dunno.. off? Like not a proper vote ( or i dunno, maybe votes are always like this?). Do they have another purpose in this voting? Maybe I'm just being stupid and thinking too much in to it. Is it worth voting do you think? Cuz, nowadays whatever they pull just seems to exist to please certain fans, while throwing Canon and the authors work outta the window.
Anyway, despite what I think the whole thing is fun, thanks for putting the link, I'm getting my people involved ;p
(≧◠◡◠≦) REMEMBER to take care of yourself and keep yourself warm ( it's freezing here).
Hi @vanilacatchocalatecat !! 💕 I'm doing fine thankyou what about yourself!?🧡 Oh they are very obviously fishing for data and for a company it is always good to do such research. Age/gender, any kind of data that includes getting to know their active/engaging audience. Especially right now as 'Boruto' isn't doing great seemingly (regarding criticism) I can understand they want to know what age group etc is (still) interested in the characters and which exactly. In fact, at this point I think it is absolutely crucial information for them to gather feedback for the franchise. Perhaps even to put them more into the spotlight. Have you seen the comments during Jump Festa? The disappointment? The fandom and sub-fandoms can say whatever but it is clear that they HAD to drag in Sasuke to keep 'Boruto' as a show relevant. The 'Code Arc' by itself wasn't going to cut it. On top of that, I don't even think they are entirely sure themselves how to proceed with everything which is why they pull stunts like this. With information you get out from marketing analytics you can. It is very smart. BUT. Doesn't mean we have to like it or the way they "handle" these things as it feels entirely insincere. Also doesn't mean that you should/shouldn't vote a certain way because of it. But it's good to be aware of it so you can act (or not) accordingly. You can still vote for your favorite character even if you're aware of all of this because what is the alternative? Having a character we don't like win and needing Kishimoto to "feature" them in some sort of new Manga and hoping he'll figure it out or whatever? Truth is, it doesn't matter, apart from voting (I guess) it's not in our hands. Never was, never will be. Whatever the outcome may be, we'll just have to trust that Kishimoto stays true to his own storytelling as he did for Naruto/Gaiden/'Boruto' the Movie and hope he gets that chance in the first place. So, in that sense I say, vote however you like regardless.. or not. Thankyou for the reminder btw! It is really getting cold here!! ❄️❄️ Hope you stay warm too, get an extra blanket and hot drinks 🥰💕
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multi-lefaiye · 2 years
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Hiya Multi!! ...I'm not sure if you're the right person to talk to about Tales from the Gas Station, but if you are, then great! So for context: I'm trying to break into the genre of horror media more (though I'm staying far as fuck away from the bloodbath gorefests and screeching jumpscares that make an autistic person whose noise sensitivity is through the roof, like me, jump out of their chair) and because of this, I'm compiling a list of horror media that my friends recommend me to check out!! So, would you mind giving me a brief summary of Tales from the Gas Station (like what it's media format is: web series, etc), and also where I can watch / read it with a link provided? Thank you in advance <3 /p
Also, here's what I have so far for horror media:
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oh i am absolutely the right person to talk to about tales from the gas station, considering that's one of my strongest fixations haha!!!
i definitely understand wanting to avoid gorier horror or horror that's full of jumpscares, and i'm happy to report that, for the most part, tales from the gas station is gore and jumpscare free! it does have some gore, but the gore is never the focus and it doesn't delve into torture porn type content. and there’s no jumpscares in it at all!
this got long, so i'll put the rest under the cut haha.
tales from the gas station is a horror and creepypasta series centered around the employees of a small gas station located at the edge of a small town. i say both horror and creepypasta because it started as a creepypasta series posted on reddit, but later the story was expanded and developed further into a four-part book series!
the protagonist of tales from the gas station is jack townsend (yes, he has the same name as the author haha, kinda in the same way that the protagonist of the magnus archives has the same name as the creator). jack is, effectively, the manager at the gas station, and the series follows him as the horrors around the gas station gradually escalate in severity and intensity, some of which as a direct result of jack and his friends' actions.
in terms of the actual plot, i can tell you that the plot kicks off when jack's best friend and coworker antonio pulls him aside one day to tell him something strange about a customer who just walked in--that being that antonio actually KILLED said customer last night (on accident). things spiral very quickly.
i have a lot of thoughts and emotions about tales from the gas station and it's genuinely one of my favorite pieces of horror media of all time.
okay now here's where i write really some long paragraphs explaining the content warnings, because i want to be detailed and give context where i can.
in terms of content warnings, the biggest ones i can give are that the series dives into issues of terminal illness (as jack was diagnosed with a terminal illness as a teenager), deteriorating mental health, cults, suicide, psychiatric abuse, some drug use, and so so SO much murder. there are scenes including some graphic descriptions of blood and gore, but like i said the gore is never really the focus and these descriptions don't overstay their welcome.
i also want to give a separate warning that there is some ableist language used in reference to certain characters, and while this is condemned by the narrative as the characters saying those things are very clearly Assholes i still understand that this can be very jarring. (the biggest example that comes to mind is when jack, who is heavily coded as autistic, is called the r-slur multiple times in volume one.) there are also, as is present in a lot of media, general throwing around of terms like 'psychopath' in a derogatory way, especially in reference to characters like spencer middleton.
aaaand lastly, the books don't go into a lot of detail about the town the gas station is next to, but they do not shy away from the fact that it is a small town in the deep south in the U.S., which means there's references to and discussions of racism and xenophobia, as well as a good ol' chunk of misogyny. however, once again, the characters spouting that are very clearly portrayed as The Assholes and condemned by the narrative--the books aren't promoting those lines of thinking.
now, in terms of where you can access tales from the gas station if you're interested! i obviously recommend the books, but i also definitely recommend the original creepypasta series/short stories as well!! not all of the original creepypastas are canon anymore, but if you're not able to access the books at this point, they tell roughly the same story and cover much of the same material (the books are just much more in-depth.)
also, as a fun note, the original creepypastas are framed as a blog written by the character jack townsend about his experiences! the books are a look at the *actual* events of the story, while the creepypastas are the versions the character shares with the world.
there are also some official comics, but i actually have yet to dive into those myself so i don't have much to say about them at this point!
i also highly recommend the narrations of the series done by mrcreepypasta on youtube!! he also is the performer for the audiobooks, and in general his reading of the series is top notch. i genuinely can't imagine anyone else playing the character jack townsend.
now! links:
the author's website, specifically the main stories (and the ones that are, as far as i know, still considered canon: [link]
the books themselves (this is an amazon link, specifically for the bundle version of them available on kindle): [link]
the full playlist of every tales from the gas station narration done by mrcreepypasta: [link]
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ckret2 · 4 years
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“You’re so vain” “Give em hell kid” And “I hope you die” I’d love to hear those explanations
Righto! Okay so recap for the people who might have missed it, this is about the radiosnake playlist I mentioned/linked a bit over a week ago, Serpentine & Demonswing. When I posted it I also added an “and if you wanna know why any songs are on the playlist you’re free to ask.” The playlist is a work in progress so some of my answers are gonna be “so here’s the explanation for why it was included but tbh I’m not 100% on keeping it.”
Important things to mention before getting into it: the playlist is build specifically off my headcanons from “Cold Day In Hell,” and so all of the songs act on the assumption that CDIH is “canon.” (tl;dr: they’re exes, because Alastor got scared of emotional intimacy, told Sir Pent he never actually liked him, and ran off after blowing up all his airships.) The first chunk of songs is from Sir Pent’s perspective, the second chunk is from Alastor’s, the third is from them both or about them both, and the last few songs are “I like the vibe but honestly am not sure this fits the playlist.”
Also, y’all are welcome to keep asking me about songs, because this is a lot of fun.
I’m absolutely sure that tumblr is going to delete this read more out of the post but I’m going to put one anyway, maybe it’ll let this one work just to be contrary. If it doesn’t, I apologize for the dash stretcher, that’s just how tumblr do.
So! Explanations:
You’re So Vain (Lyrics)
This one is on the Sir Pentious side, so, although it’s not directly/accurately about Alastor, it is about how Sir Pent sees him in light of their catastrophic breakup.
Verse 1 is less on the nose in its description of Alastor, but you get the impression of someone who is obsessed with how he comes across to other people, and who is far more interested in himself and the image he’s giving off than he is in any of the people he’s trying to impress. A great deal of Alastor’s personality is—or at the very least, comes off as—completely performative. As though to this day he’s still nothing but a radio host performing for a listening audience, even when he’s only talking to one person. The fact that he’s always wearing a fake smile and pointedly providing his own sound effects adds to that impression of a performer who never breaks character.
And the fact that the character in the song is still wholly self-absorbed even when he’s dancing with a partner gives a nice little glimpse into how Sir Pent’s retroactively reinterpreted his last evening with Alastor.
Verse 2 is the stanza that comes closest to completely accurately reflecting what went down between them. First, the alliance between them, the implicit promises that they the were going to conquer Hell and then Heaven as partners in crime—“Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair / And that you would never leave”—and then, the breakup—“But you gave away the things you loved / And one of them was me.” It’s the one line that acknowledges that the character in the song did, indeed, actually love the singer, and wasn’t just performing a role/playing at being in love.
It’s also a line that would ring false to Sir Pentious, because in the aftermath of CDIH, he genuinely doesn’t believe that Alastor ever loved him. He completely buys Alastor’s claim that he was just screwing around with Sir Pent’s emotions for his own entertainment. Words to the effect of “one of [the things you loved] was me” would never come out of Sir Pent’s mouth.
However. Of all the lines in all of the songs in Sir Pent’s portion of the playlist, that one line is the most accurate thing that could be said about Alastor, the blade that would stab into the core of who he is and the role that he played in this story. Because of his vanity—his selfishness, his pride, his obsession with his own independence, his fear of love, his fear of vulnerability, his fear of sharing his life with someone else, etc.—he didn’t just lose what he loved, he did very deliberately and intentionally give it away.
(I’ve always found that line to be the most interesting in the song, for the hint that this vain person did indeed truly feel for someone else, so I’m glad that line fits so well here.)
Verse 3 is just more “what Alastor is like as observed by Sir Pent,” except even more accurately than the first stanza. Constantly running around, constantly moving on from one brief source of entertainment to another (just stuff “threw his support behind the Happy Hotel” somewhere between “gambled on a horse race” and “watched an eclipse”), constantly socializing with dangerous people and people whom he’s going to hurt without caring in the slightest.
Okay so that’s the lyrics.
Making sure the aesthetics/styles/genres of the songs match the character they’re for is one of my high priorities on this fanmix—not to the extent that having the wrong style is an instant dealbreaker, but I’m going to be hesitant to include a song that doesn’t at all match the sound I’m going for. For Sir Pentious, I’m kind of running with two styles.
The first style is “sounds Victorian-ish enough to get a shrug and a nod from anybody who doesn’t actually know/care about Victorian-era music,” so that’s gonna be just about anything orchestral/symphonic that doesn’t clearly fall into a different genre, symphonic metal that sounds symphonic enough to satisfy me, instrumental covers of other songs (string quartets, piano, full orchestra...), things with harpsichords (LISTEN i know that harpsichords are more baroque but they’ve got the right Vibe, you know, they’ve got the Feeling), and things with organ—but like, it’s gotta sound like pipe organ (pipe organ—sounds like a church) and not like Hammond organ (Hammond organ—sounds like a baseball game). Also steampunk, except a lot of “steampunk” genre music sounds swingy/jazzy, so those songs get ruled out because that’s Alastor’s aesthetic. And also, like, actual classical music, but I’m not into a lot of actual classical music, so I don’t think any’s actually made it in yet, lmao.
The second style is based on what the creator herself said about Sir Pent’s music preferences: “Sir Pentious would listen to Blink-182. Pentious would literally listen to stuff like Linkin Park, Green Day, the emo stuff.” So I took "the emo stuff” as “oh okay cool so the stuff I listened to at 15 got it” and ran wild with that. I’ve been most heavily drawing from My Chemical Romance, Panic! At The Disco, and Mindless Self Indulgence to represent that half of Sir Pent’s preferences. (MSI because I feel like that fits an in-your-face and morally jaded villain, P!ATD because their newer stuff fits his flamboyance and exuberance and egotism, and MCR because... because I know them best.) I haven’t yet made much time to carefully comb the discographies of the other bands listed or look into other more traditional emo-associated acts.
Carly Simon’s original “You’re So Vain” matches neither of these styles.
I combed through about 60 different versions of “You’re So Vain” on Spotify looking for ones that meet one of these aesthetics. Like 90% of them were, I’m pretty sure, just various singers adding their vocals directly over a karaoke version of Carly Simon’s original.
In the end, the only one that came close was Marilyn Manson’s cover. He’s a bit outside of the bounds I try to stick in for Sir Pent, but like, okay, he’s industrial metal, but in a particularly goth way, that’s close enough to emo. To my mind, “Sir Pent listens to emo” is like... Sir Pentious’s musical preferences are going to be, 1) counterculture, the kind of stuff that causes conservative Christian moms to go into moral panics, but also 2) mainstream counterculture, the kind of bands that produce huge hits & get featured in major blockbuster movies, but also also 3) slightly dated mainstream counterculture, i.e., at the end of the 2010s he’s listening to the bands that may still be popular but that peaked in the mid 2000s, in keeping with the way he’s trying to keep hip and modern but always seems a little bit behind.
So, in the 2010s, he’s listening to 2000s emo acts. In the 2000s, he was listening to the 1990s’ biggest metal acts (like Marilyn Manson) and possibly grunge acts (things like Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins). In the 1990s, he was listening to the 1980s’ biggest post-punk and new wave acts (like The Cure, Joy Division/New Order, Depeche Mode). Always evolving his stylistic preferences, always trying to keep up, but always a little behind. So that’s how I justify putting Marilyn Manson in lmao.
Although that was the only version of “You’re So Vain” I thought fit well enough, I also found a version by Trash Pour 4, a version by Les Reed Orchestra, and a version by Giant Sand that were all very good. Trash Pour 4 is driving me crazy because I can’t quite figure out what genre they are, I just can’t place them—but they’ve got several other good covers that I’d like to take advantage of at some point.
I also found a song called “You’re So Vain (Christian Dior)” by The Energy Commission that’s not a cover of Carly Simon’s song, just a new song with the same name. I’m lowkey considering including on Alastor’s side of the playlist. It’d serve as a very sharp critique of how image obsessed Sir Pent is, there’s some snappy turns of phrase that seem like they’d appeal to Alastor’s sense of humor (my two favorites are “He went off the deep end ‘cause he’s so shallow” and “He’s got a timepiece on his wrist and it says ‘watch me’”), the fact that it’s a critique specifically of high class materialism fits with the fact that I headcanon Sir Pent as coming from British nobility while Alastor’s ancestry is both racially and socially mixed (including at least one close relative who was a slave, I’m thinking a grandparent but haven’t settled on my headcanons yet), and I love when there are parallels like that in playlists about the relationship between lovers/partners/rivals/siblings/any-combo-of-two-people.
The reason I haven’t added it yet is because, by the end of the song, it’s not just a critique of being a rich shallow image-obsessed douche, but specifically of how that culture ties in to exploitative capitalism that’s wrecking human lives and the world—which, in the context of the characters we’re talking about here, would translate into a criticism of Sir Pentious’s very-imperialist-sounding take-over-the-world villain ambitions. Which isn’t something I think Alastor cares about. He probably should, but like, he just doesn’t. He’s a villain himself. I’m sure he’s got his own morals and standards and hard limits but “take over the world” isn’t on his list of dealbreakers. What’s taking over the world include? Mass murder and subjugation? Yeah, he’s cool with that. So that’s why I’m still on the fence about adding it.
Give ‘Em Hell, Kid (Lyrics)
So remember how I said that My Chemical Romance is one of the bands I’ve drawn from most heavily so far in looking for emo Sir Pent songs? Yeah for about a day there were six different MCR songs sitting in Serpentine & Demonswing as I slowly whittled them down to the ones that I thought fit best. “Give ‘Em Hell, Kid” is one of the last three, and actually one that I’m constantly on the verge of cutting.
Lyrically, it’s an Alastor song. There’s mentions of the singer having come from New Orleans (listen... i am a sucker for songs that mention New Orleans, it automatically earns five points on the imaginary “is this an Alastor song?” rubric in my head). The singer is singing about a love interest who’s gone, and he’s making no moves to pursue/reclaim the love interest, wishing them well (“So go on, live your life”), but he’s a wreck and a lesser person without them (“If you were here, I'd never have a fear,” “Well I'm a total wreck and almost every day”), and it’s just getting worse with time, not better (“But I miss you more than I did yesterday”).
The line “Some might say we are made from the sharpest things you say” although directed toward “you,” i.e. the love interest, i.e. Sir Pentious, in my head actually reflects more on the things Alastor said to Sir Pentious: the cruel things he said to Pent—that he’s weak, ineffective, behind the times, a has-been, never going to conquer hell—ended up a self-fulfilling prophecy, because that’s exactly what Alastor’s rampage made happen. Today, as he is now, Sir Pentious is made from the sharpest things Alastor said.
“Your dreams and your hopeless hair” makes me think of Sir Pent’s wild efforts to conquer hell (and, of course, his ridiculous cobra hood), and “We never wanted it to be this way for all our lives” is a perfect expression of Alastor’s regrets/remorse over what his actions have done to both of their lives, but especially to Sir Pent’s life.
And all the references to violence—murder scenes, firing squads, sharpest things—fit with the fact that both of them chose to live lives soaked in blood.
So it’s a perfect Alastor song. The only problem is, it’s an MCR song, which is sooo far outside of my acceptable genres for him. (I’m not gonna get into Alastor’s genres now bc there are better songs to do that on, just know emo ain’t it.) And not only is it outside of his acceptable genres, it’s in the OTHER character’s acceptable genres, which is very messy. I can vibe with “lovers’ songs borrowing from each other’s aesthetic” a LITTLE bit when it’s used to represent, like, emotional synchronicity or the like (ex: both “Roustabout” and Vernian Process’s “Maple Leaf Rag” are on my “Alastor+Sir Pent style fusion songs” list). But MCR is a big departure from Alastor’s acceptable styles.
Plus, the playlist already has two MCR songs, and do I really need three songs from the same band? Unless there’s a really good reason, I try to avoid having repeats from the same band on one playlist—I feel like a good well-rounded fanmix oughta have a diversity of sources. (With “a really good reason” being something like “I’ve got the playlist divided into five sections detailing five phases of the character’s life and each section is introduced with a different track from the same band” or “I’ve got an instrumental version of the song to kick off the playlist to serve as ‘foreshadowing’ for when the version with lyrics shows up at the most dramatic moment” or something like that.)
If I was going to, like, make it a thing, I could. Justify it like “there’s one MCR song that represents them when they’re together, one MCR song from Sir Pent’s perspective, and one MCR song from Alastor’s perspective, like a little triangle,” but like... if I was going to do that I feel like I’d want to do it with a style that’s either representative of both of them or else independent of both of them, and MCR is so heavily a Sir Pent sound. Basically, having three songs from one band would be okay if it was a band that vibes with the overall tone I’m shooting for in the playlist—but it’s not. So I’m very torn on “Give ‘Em Hell, Kid.”
“El Tango De Roxanne” + “Overture” + “I Hope You Die”
Okay before I can talk about “I Hope You Die” by itself, I kind of have to explain its exact position in the playlist and its relationship with the other two songs I just listed.
While MOST of the playlist is chunked up into the four sections I mentioned earlier (Sir Pent, Alastor, both, undecided), within those sections the songs aren’t really in any particular order. The one exception is the very first three songs on the playlist/the very first three songs in Sir Pent’s section.
These three songs, presented in that order, all as Sir Pent songs, serve as Sir “in war, the side remembered is the side with the most style” Pentious the Super Villain making his big entrance like:
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“El Tango De Roxanne” starts slow/quiet, and then (with a couple of brief dips) it gradually builds in volume and pain and intensity, getting faster and more emphatic, switching from mournful longing to nearly-angry anguish, until it ends with a pained scream, steampunkish percussion, howling background singers, and a wailing violin.
And then it pauses, for just a moment.
And then “Overture” hammers you with the most dramatic opening chord you will ever hear on an organ in your life, perfectly matching the energy at the end of “El Tango De Roxanne” and maintaining that level of energy throughout the song.
And then it stops so quickly it’s like someone gasped, holding its breath for a split second—and then some dude yells “You must die! I alone am best!” and the guitars kick in for “I Hope You Die,” leading into a depiction of the most intense, vitriolic, disgusting sort of loathing imaginable.
The build-up from “El Tango De Roxanne” and “Overture” really revs up “I Hope You Die,” the intensity of the organ in “Overture” highlights the intensity of the guitar in “I Hope You Die,” and all together it hypes up what could have been just a dark humor song about hating someone into something that sounds like a very genuine demonstration of hatred.
And taken all together, it makes for a fantastic intro for Sir Pent.
It also serves as a perfect intro to the current state of affairs between him and Alastor—sort of expressing his personal emotional journey on the morning Alastor betrayed him, as his reaction transforms over the course of three songs from grief/despair to fathomless fury.
There’s more I could say individually about “El Tango De Roxanne” and “Overture,” but I won’t, because it’s “I Hope You Die” time.
“I Hope You Die” (Lyrics - warning for a whole stanza dedicated to hoping someone gets raped in prison)
A small handful of the songs in my Hazbin playlists were discovered in and added from existing Hazbin character playlists I found on Spotify before I started making my own. “I Hope You Die” was one of them, found here. Which is why it was added even though it doesn’t fit my strict genre standards, it won me over before I narrowed down the styles I’m working with lmao.
(I feel like “El Tango De Roxanne” was one of those too, but I can’t now find a Spotify playlist containing it that added it before I did. Where did I grab it from? It’s not something I would’ve looked up on my own, something must have inspired me. IDK what though. None of the other songs mentioned in this post were found on other playlists.)
So this song is, obviously, just about how much some dude hates somebody else and wants extremely horrible things to happen to them. It’s sorta... *eyes lyrics uneasily* ... sorta tasteless; but, tasteless in a way that I feel like reflects back on the character singing the song. The feeling I come away from after finishing the song isn’t “the band wants you to think the person they’re singing about deserves this to happen to them,” because it doesn’t even give a reason why the singer hopes this person suffers; but rather, “the band wants you to think that this is the kind of hatred that the character/persona the singer is portraying is capable of, this is the kind of vile stuff that character wants to see done to their enemies, this is representative of the depths of that character’s rage.” Which is why I’m like “yeah... okay, sure, that fits” even though I’m real iffy about the last couple stanzas.
Because for a character who’s in Hell surrounded by people who have stomped on the last dredges of their civility and decency, and a character who’s patterned after a super villain (and, because the series creator dropped the idea that there are heroes/villains in the living world, the only super villain in this setting), and a character who gleefully boasts about being evil, and a character who we know demonstrates very rapid/extreme emotions and expressions of hate/outrage... Yes, I can absolutely see this song as the exact sort of hatred Sir Pentious would level at somebody who’s slighted him. And Alastor blew way the hell past “slighting” him. Alastor, without exaggeration, has ruined his life (afterlife?) and over fifty years later Sir Pent is still unsuccessfully struggling to get back up to the level he was at before he even met Alastor. Right now, Sir Pentious really and truly and deeply despises Alastor.
A song like this—sheer, frothing, unrestrained, vengeful contempt—tells you a whole lot about what kind of emotions Sir Pentious is capable; and it tells you a whole lot about the kind of effect Alastor’s actions have had on him, to inspire this level of reaction from someone who was very close to him for fifteen years and increasingly in love with him for probably a good amount of that time.
Plus, the “You must die! I alone am best!” is such a very, very Sir Pentious sentiment.
So that’s those songs! Again, y’all are free to ask me for my thoughts on more. Yes, most of them will probably be like this, lol.
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sweettodo · 3 years
Text
a simple competition.
⟿ Hisoka Morow x freader x Chrollo Lucilfer
Includes : threesome, toys, smut, not even a good plot but yk, consumption of alcohol
word count : 2,7k.
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my last little surprise for you guys, some more threesum action .... here you go puppies. THX FOR 300 [ almost 400 rn :) ] <3 !!! your favorite men at your disposal... [y/n is aged].
fun fact, I'm eating takis rn, are these spicier than usual or am I imagining things ? i’m also watching ‘malcolm and marie’ AMAZING movie, i highly suggest it, the dynamic of the two is so detailed, such a good movie.
••
Maybe it wasn't a clever idea to drink, but once you attained that nice and warm sensation in your gut, there was certainly nothing stopping you from finishing the already half-empty bottle of pink whitney.
Laying sprawled out on the couch, staring at the ceiling as the room slowly spins around you. Content and relaxed with your position.
It wasn't your fault, Pakudona reassuring you that it wouldn't hurt to have a little fun tonight, that Chrollo wouldn't heed if you crashed here for the night, he was tipsy, manspreading on the other end of the couch, eyes puffy and glossed over, enjoying the quiet.
Music was playing thirty minutes previously, but as the night went on, one by one, the others hit the road to sleep off their intoxication, it was already past midnight.
One person had yet to leave, that was Hisoka... of course.
He wandered back into the living room, plopping down next to you and your friend on the couch, "leaving anytime soon? Y/n?"
You shook your head, "staying the night." Hisoka's arched eyebrows rise, a little smile tugging at the niche of his mouth.
"Is that so?" Chrollo sits up, staring at the kaleidoscopic man, a sarcastic undergone on his tongue.
"That's what happens when you drive here, and drink" You nod, "although I didn't quite intend on you staying the night, Morow." He hums, Hisoka pinches the corner of the thin card, waving it back and forth teasingly.
"I can't let you have our playmate all to yourself," you roll your eyes.
"It's not like that," you mutter, staring the magician in the eyes, "I couldn't leave if I wanted to."
"That is true," Chrollo interjects, "that doesn't mean you want to leave though, is it?" you shrug.
"No, I wanna stay, got an issue with that?" you ask, he shakes his head.
"Of course not- although, I suppose Hisoka would be better off on his way."
You estimated things would only get progressively worse from here, the moment Hisoka's bloodlust began to fill the air, you felt this was your cue; before you're able to leave the room, Hisoka's hand is fastened around your wrist, sitting you back down.
"Oh, you can't flee now," dread fills your face, "come on, we might as well finish the conversation."
You and Chrollo both knew what he was talking about. No matter how petty or pathetic, it appears to be that the rivalry between the two never seemed to subside, even drunk.
"Go on, since you have so much to say."
"Am I wrong for thinking my friend is a pretty girl? I seem to remind her more than you do."
"You seem to think you own her, it's pitiful honestly, " Blushing, you look down at your thighs, "do you think she's pretty, Chrollo?"
"I do. I think she knows that right?" you peek up at him, he gleams and tilts his head.
"Look at her, my, you must like us flattering you." You shake your head.
"That's because you neglect to tell her more often, does Chrollo ever call you pretty?" with Hisoka pushing Chrollo's every button, tensions were surging, both men now at the edge of their seats- literally.
"No, he doesn't," you speak, the magician letting out a deep chuckle, you felt like you were being scrutinized, the eyes burning into you felt poisonous and dour, you felt minuscule compared to them.
"I could do so much better than call you pretty, right kitten?" your heart sinks to your stomach, gulping hard. It was too hard to look at them in the eyes as you sunk further into the couch.
"Are we making you nervous?"
The inquiry continues.
"Yeah- you are." You retort, "you guys are talking about me like I'm not here."
"Then let's ask the lady herself, y/n." Looking up to meet Hisoka's gaze, "who do you think could take better care of you?"
Heart pounding out of your chest, your stomach filled with butterflies, "I- I don't know, I've never thought about it." Laughing, you look to see Chrollo, who's standing to his feet.
"I think I know a way to help you decide," smug smile peeking from his face, "unless you don't want to?"
A single nod is all they needed to know, Hisoka standing to his feet, seeing how you sat on the couch as still as a statue, "please don't be so tense, you know how good we are to you." Hisoka slowly picks up your hand.
He's steering you to your feet, "what do you have in mind, Chrollo?" the man leading you two upstairs.
"I think I have something that'll work out for all of us."
The dress you wore to this get-together now seemed like you were exposed, bare, and vulnerable, you knew what their agenda was, you didn't fancy the idea of being the center of attention.
Chrollo slowly clicking open his door, walking in, and promptly turning on the light, you're led to the side of his king-sized bed, his room was both contemporary and warm, comforting feeling; the walls a deep vermilion, the sheets plush, soft and black tones.
"We should leave it up to our little kitten to decide," the buttons on his shirt slowly coming undone, stopping at his sternum.
"What do you think, Morow?" Hisoka looks at you with low eyes.
"I'll go first."
Chrollo stalks towards you, sitting there falling apart at the seams, Chrollo's large and reaching behind your ear, thumb gently caressing your jawline, side to side, "you okay with this? Sweetheart?" you nod, the name sending jolts between your thighs.
Hisoka's rubbing your bare leg, sitting next to you on the mattress as his fingertips trail up and down, his hand stopping inside your thigh and pressing a leg open, Chrollo clasping your other knee and you lay on your back
"I'll get some time to please you, Hisoka gets the same when I'm done, yes?"
You're breathless, Hisoka grabbing you and pressing your back against him, his hands pinching the seams of your dress, "cute little dress- you should wear it more often for me." He hums, rolling it up, your thighs buckled together while lifting your back off the mattress, the dress sitting bunched up at your hips, the panties you wore sitting on your hips.
"My, who knew she would wear something so- revealing." Arms linking around your own, Hisoka keeps you completely locked in place.
"Did you wear these for me? Kitten?" Chrollo asks, shaking your head no.
Tugging at the little strong which hardly kept you covered, “I'll keep these, yeah?” you nod, the pants of Chrollo’s fingers barely ticking you, brushing against your already anxious body.
"Stay still for me, okay?"
"Okay." You breathe.
Hand leaning over past Hisoka, he's opening up the drawer beside his bed.
Your eyes widen at the sight of the little pink toy, compact in nothing bugger than four inches long, he sits on the bed in front of you, bringing the little object to your core.
He switches it on the lowest setting, the only noise in the room was the quiet buzzing of the vibrator as he barely touches your clit, the tiniest contact with the toy having your chest rise and fall, "keep these open for me, okay princess?" his fingers hook below your panties, pulling them down and placing them beside him.
"Such a pretty pussy, don't you think, Hisoka?" You're gnawing on your bottom lip from the teasing little touches with the toy, he was doing this on purpose; your legs laid open, the other man holding your arms to where you couldn't do anything if you wanted to.
"It is, I'm sure it's even prettier when it's cumming,"
Chrollo finally presses the vibrator onto your clit, he leans over your cunt, spitting, your mouth opens, the saliva hardly cooling your excited cunt.
He uses his free hand to finish unbuttoning his shirt, dropping it on the floor, he leans down leveled to your cunt, holding your leg over his broad and muscular shoulder, his tongue licking a stripe towards your occupied clit. Your body shakes, digging further into Hisoka's chest, he holds you tighter.
"Fuck, p-please!" you gasp, wanting to dig your hands into his hair, thrashing against Hisoka's arms, "let me touch-" your pleads fall on deaf ears, Chrollo’s tongue swirling into you in sinful ways, your legs twitching, the toy too much to handle.
The euphoric feeling of the overstimulation sending a pool of cream right onto Chrollo's tongue, lapping up every drop of you.
You were dizzy, Chrollo drinking up all of your essences, his hand pressed into your thigh to keep you from buckling onto him, your back grinding against the pressure of Hisoka's growing erection, his hands had grabbed the straps of your dress, one by one pulling them down and releasing your tits from the braless dress.
It's almost too good to be true- the man spending a dangerous amount of time eating your pussy like it was his very last meal, tasting everything he possibly could, the vibrator maintaining its spot in little circles around your swollen and screaming clit.
Ripping orgasm after orgasm out of your body, you're dripping sweat, he pulls off of you, your cum covering his reddish swollen lips, chin soaked. You looked a wreck, makeup streaming down your face, legs numb, his head coming to yours, he kisses your panting lips, releasing you from Hisoka.
The taste of your cum filling your mouth, his tongue licking past your bottom lip and into your mouth.
"Take this off." tearing at your dress, peeling it over your head, unzipping his pants, "you're gonna straddle me and stay still, is that okay with you, kitty?"
"O-okay, what about Hisoka?" Grabbing your hips, you straddle him. He raises you a little.
"He's gonna watch me make you cum a few more times-" hissing in the air as he assists you to slide down onto his cock, the stretch was unbearable, but you push through, trying not to slouch over in pain.
"-hurts, bad!" You sob.
"You take me so well, it'll only hurt for a second, promise."
His hand's move, one to your waist and one loosely around your throat as he holds you up to get a better grip on your already weakened body.
Keeping eye contact with Hisoka as your body is demolished by the man beneath you, eyes boring into you seductively, captivated by your mess of a face.
You felt as if you were being torn in half, crying out his name as he knew just how to fuck you; fucking your pussy just right.
Fucking you so hard you were going numb.
"Gonna cum! Gonna cum again!" you screamed, head falling back as you searched desperately for air, Chrollo rolling his hips into you as he released you, slumping to his chest, his chest stick from sweat.
"You wanna be filled with my seed, kitty?" Nodding in his shoulder.
"Please fill me- I want your cum,"
The feeling of his cum seeping down his cock and deep into your beaten-up cunt, his breath heavy against your ear.
You sit up, large arms wrapping from behind you and pulling you off of your straddle, Chrollo getting off the bed to clean himself off as Hisoka sits you on the bed, tucking your hair behind your ear gently, smiling as you look up at him, blurred eyes.
"My my, I don't think she can handle it, or can you?"
"I-I can, trust me." He smiles, pleased with your answer, his soft hands taking up your arm before leaning you back, onto your back, he was sweaty, so his shirt was clinging to his body, his hair was messily draped over his shoulders, pulling his tie loose while standing between your open legs, "let me see your wrists, princess."
He's leading you against the bed frame, linking your hands together and finishing off the knot around the post of the frame, the man getting on his knees between your legs, letting his shirt hand open as his hands work at his slacks, unbuckling the leather belt and tossing it to the side, "you look so innocent, tied up and quiet as a mouse, even after you just got fucked out," he pushes down his pants, erection throbbing from underneath his underwear.
The area between your legs throb, he was beyond ready to feel your walls tighten around him, he was ready to hear you begging for more.
He needed to one-up Chrollo.
He lifts your hips, your legs propped against his thighs while remaining restrained, his tip aiming into you accordingly before pushing into your beaten cunt.
His arm propped, flexing as he grips the headboard, drilling into your cunt with no tenderness, he spares you no pain as he ruts into you, ready to split you in half the instant he saw you spilling cum at the hands of his rival.
The size of him left you perplexed, the way he was splitting you open while bringing you to an indescribable state of heaven had you a sloppy mess, the thick cock he had with his veins filling in the little nerves you had yet to feel seconds earlier. He filled you, and he filled you well.
Hisoka fucks you until your head is blank, eyes seeing white, one of his hands gripping your hip, keeping you from laying fully on your back.
You try to cry put to him, and he notices.
He slows only slightly, rolling his hips back and forth into you so you can speak, "s-so good, it feels so good!"
Each rut of his hips sends you into oblivion, the way his hips bumped and clashed against your body left you spitting out a mantra of his name, Chrollo inches away from you, rolling your perked nipple in between his fingers, sending chills up your body.
Hisoka brings his eyes to you, "joining in, my friend?" Chrollo pulls his hand back, you almost find yourself whining.
“Did I fuck you better, y/n?” Chrollo taunts, his lips barely pressing against the life of your ear, “is Hisoka making you feel good?” Hisoka's beautiful golden eyes stalk you, waiting for your answer; stabbing right into your soul.
“Answer him, go on, kitten; did he fill you as good as I am?”
The questions were throwing you in for a loop, your stomach twisted, digging your head back deeper into the pillow of Chrollo’s bed.
“Fill me, please- daddy.” You cry, you longed to touch him, to feel his soft hair as he pummeled into you; you tugged on your wrists softly, already weak, the tied limbs going numb and tingling.
Before you know it, another orgasm is torn out of you; groaning out as you tightened and clenching around him, body once again convulsing, legs tightening around Hisoka’s waist. Each time they made you cum, the more came spilling from your cunt, it was almost unreal how much the bed was soaked, how soaked your thighs were, Hisoka’s pants being stained in the process.
This pretty little soaked pussy, sucking me in so good.” Panting, his head falls back, his dick quaver’s while his thrusts become more staggered, hand gripping tighter around your already sore hip.
His seed bathes both you and his cock, hips sputtering as he slowly slips out of your abused cunt. your head spinning, a panting mess at you blink and stare at the ceiling.
You could barely move, the men in the room throwing on clothes, hearing zippers, you lift your head.
Chrollo hands you a blanket, draping it over your body.
Sitting up, the blanket around you, you look at the two men who were fiddling around doing nothing but looming around the room.
While Hisoka buttons up his shirt, he tilts his head towards you, “tired, princess?” you nod.
A devious smirk dances on your lips, they look at you confused, “perhaps though, I might need another round, you know- to decide who was better.”
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hmsindecision · 7 years
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So dumb but you're like the only radfem blog I follow. I was arguing with a man about an article called Young men giving up on marriage: 'women aren't women anymore.' Anyways I said something like "Marriage isn't inherently feminist. Yeah it's changed because people marry for love but it's still flawed. And then I tacked on, "And the big reason I'm bisexual is because men have this attitude. Then he said I wasn't listening to him. I said "I was but he's still kinda sexist." 1
Continued: And then I basically listed problems like rape, wife beating, FGM, child marriage, and stuff like that. Granted, I should have left it at that but he said “You make no sense except to be pissed off at the world and wants self pleasure. And yes birth control should be mandatory for women like you. Better yet they should cut off your genitals because you cant control the hormones coming out of them. God help you.” Like excuse me? I may have been glib and disrespectful but I wasn’t violent. 2 And then it devolved into him ranting about how he lost custody of his daughter. And how his ex suddenly got a career and found a new man. And basically my point was his problems aren’t feminist issues. He claimed to have been raped and abused by his ex. I want to have sympathy but his comment about my bits were uncalled for and unfortunately I have little patience for that type of person. And he ranted about my hormones and said I hope I find Jesus. Idk what that truly meant. 3 Given the context, what should I do about men who claim that the courts treated him unfairly and that he’s been abused by his wife but then do male things like go over the top with the insults? I get that I should state my points more strategically. And am I evil for thinking that while he may have been treated badly by his wife I don’t fully buy into him saying that his ex literally kidnapped the child? That he simply couldn’t prove in court that he was the more fit parent? As sad as it is? 5———————–The short answer? It isn’t actually your job to do anything. He crossed a huge line when he said you needed “mandatory birth control” and mentioned extreme violence towards your genitals and dismissed you as hormonal. He proved in that moment that he was never arguing with you in good faith, and had in fact believed you to be beneath him before the conversation even began. 
Fact is also, given that he brings up his ex moving on and having a career, is glib and gleeful about violence towards women, and is convinced that the courts were simply biased against him… the odds are really high that this man was abusive towards his ex-wife. There may even have been events where he was struck or an altercation because physical, but odds are good that this man spent a lot of time abusing her for things to get to that point. Even studies that show men as victims of abuse often see them citing things like “lack of a hot meal on the table” as examples of abuse. And I have personally listened abusers in different contexts describe themselves as the victims of abuse even as the examples they give show that they are absolutely the perpetrators–I even had one man break down sobbing saying that he was abused by women “not appreciating his money”. I’d tell you what he did to the women he dated but I’m sure you can imagine it was not on that paltry of a level. 
That being said, he also responded to systemic issues with his personal experience. Even if his personal experience is absolutely terrible, he is still posing a view of his personal experience as more important and relevant to statistically huge groups of women going through systemic issues like FGM. I have friends who are male rape victims and NEVER have any of them attempted to downplay the effect of rape on women as an epidemic. In fact, most of them are staunch allies because of the help and resources from women that they received in the wake of that. The average (the majority) of people that work in domestic violence and rape counseling and funding are women. 
And child custody?
Here is a huge list of studies and excerpts from them, but here are some highlights:
Noting that negative stereotypes about women encourage judges to disbelieve women’s allegations of child sexual abuse. Gender bias problems are particularly acute in family courts, and most problematic when sexual abuse of children is alleged in custody or visitation proceedings.  Negative stereotypes about women encourage judges to disbelieve women’s allegations of child sexual abuse. The report stated: “One striking example is the tendency to doubt the credibility of women who make these allegations, and to characterize them as hysterical or vindictive even when medical evidence corroborates a claim of child abuse.” (Danforth and Welling)
Noting that “Many men file proceedings to contest custody as a way of forcing an advantageous property settlement… . Contrary to public perception, men are quite successful in obtaining residential custody of their children when they actually seek it.” (Florida Supreme Court Study Commission)
Massachusetts was one of the first states to document the gender bias against women in family courts. This court-initiated study expressly found that “our research contradicted [the] perception” that “there is a bias in favor of women in these decisions.” Moreover, it found that “in determining custody and visitation, many judges and family service officers do not consider violence toward women relevant.” The Court’s study further found that “the courts are demanding more of mothers than fathers in custody disputes” and that “many courts put the needs of noncustodial fathers above those of custodial mothers and children.” (Massachusetts Supreme Court Study)
The Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence carried out a two year study of 57 battered women who had gone through a custody battle in Arizona family courts. In the Arizona study, 72% of the mothers said they were not given an adequate chance to tell the court their side of the story and 41% were ordered into mediation though the court knew there was violence. (p. 48)The survey found that courts awarded joint or sole custody to the alleged batterers 56-74% of the time (depending on the county). Many of these cases involved documented child abuse or adult abuse.
A multi-year, four-phase study using qualitative and quantitative social science research methodologies by the Wellesley Centers for Women. Battered women reported having to participate in wrenching custody battles with their ex-spouse to keep their children. They noted that their problems were aggravated and sometimes prolonged in the courts or by social service agencies. The battered women testified that they have been wrongly perceived as hysterical and have been accused of lying. The research found widespread adoption of “parental alienation syndrome,” and found “a consistent pattern of human rights abuses” by family courts, including failure to protect battered women and children from abuse, discriminating against and inflicting degrading treatment on battered women, and denying battered women due process. Histories of abuse of mother and children were routinely ignored or discounted. They also reported that evidence of abuse was often ignored, judges were insensitive, and guardians ad litem - the court-assigned advocates for children - made poor assessments. Domestic violence advocates reported that women who fear the family court process stay in abusive situations instead of seeking help. (Human Rights Tribunal on Domestic Violence and Child Custody)
You were arguing with a disrespectful, violent misogynist. That’s the crux of it. No matter how you made your points, no matter how many facts you brought up, his quick descent into graphic and violent language shows that he was never going to listen. All I can suggest, honestly, is if the conversation is public and you want to engage in it, to not stoop to his level of violence, point out what he is saying is violent, and link to studies and state facts whenever you can. You won’t change this man’s mind, but you might change the mind of other people reading. And it’s okay to say, “I’m sorry you went through that experience. That sounds really difficult. But I’m talking about beliefs widely held in groups, not your personal life.” And privately? This type of man honestly isn’t worth engaging with. He will hurt you and drain your energy, and there are better people to talk with that will listen to you and that will be respectful towards you, even if they don’t fully agree.
When he said you “weren’t listening to him”, he didn’t mean “you aren’t hearing my points”, he meant “you didn’t agree when I said my opinion, and that makes me ANGRY”. You made him made because he thought that you disagreeing with him was already an act of aggression, and he responding to that with sexist and abusive remarks about your genitals. Which… is exactly the sort of behavior you were pointing out as a problem: male violence towards women.
Quite honestly, this guy sounds like a piece of trash.
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popculturedruid · 7 years
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How would you recommend finding out more about an entity when the source material is very vague, limited, and not very popular? I'm trying to figure out a pantheon based on the Great Ones from Bloodborne, but information about pretty much all of them is few and far between. Also, I have trouble meditating due to literal ADHD, do you have any ideas for how to concentrate better? Thank you so much, your blog is lovely!!
Aww, thank you so much! That means a lot!
This is such a good question. I wanted to take some time here again to really answer this one to give you a proper answer. That’s why it took me a bit to get back to you.
I understand your frustration here. It is very frustrating to look for information about your desired entity and find little to nothing. I looked up Bloodborne just to see what we were getting at, then quickly realized I was going to give myself spoilers because I probably wanted to play this game. :)
From the bit that I let myself get a look at, the Great Ones pantheon immediately reminds me of the Daedra from the Elder Scrolls games. Not in such basic terms as good and evil, but simply from the scope of multiple forms, alternate planes, and just generally screwing with people. There is a fairly large group of Tamriel PCPs on Tumblr, it might be worth a look to check into see how they structure their relationships for ideas to maybe start your own. I’m going to refer you over to @popculturepagan who has a tag on Elder Scrolls PCP. Not saying you need to go that way at all, I’m just trying to show you another pantheon that’s a bit more established that might give you some ideas to help you get yours started!
It appears the direct reference for the Great Ones is H.P. Lovecraft and his “Great Old Ones.” You have undoubtedly heard of Cthulhu. Cthulhu is just a high priest to one of them. Many folks make Cthulhu and the Great Old Ones out to be chibi, but if you read the stories, they’re actually quite terrifying. If you haven’t read the stories, and you’re still itching for more Bloodborne, the best place to go would be for the inspiration for the Great Ones: Lovecraft’s stories. He wrote many, but you can get the stories that just contain the ones with Cthulhu. I think they would also mostly include the Great Old Ones in those as well. His stories are just great in general, however. From these stories of the GOO (I got tired writing that out :P), you could probably pick up a bit more on the general characteristics of your GOs.
I would also encourage you to search through fanfiction. I have called fanfiction our weird version of Shared Personal Gnosis. If the community in general kinda feels a certain way about a character, they generally might be on to something.
For instance, everyone is probably going to say that Luke Skywalker seems like a pretty swell guy. He’s not likely to go nuts anytime soon (I would though, all alone on that planet, let’s be real). If someone writes a version of Luke that runs around murdering all the things for the lolz, people are generally going to disagree.
(That’s not to say you can’t end up contacting a different version of that entity, but that’s getting into something different, and that’s where the theory of multiverses comes into play. And how @octomantra and I have two different Eds in our heads.)
You might point out again that this is a small community still, and a character being out of character this early on is not going to be as obvious as Luke running around killing all the younglings. But I hope you would start to see a trend in how others are viewing this world as well, even if they aren’t viewing it in the exact same way. It’s still getting built.
Here’s the link to the Archive of Our Own Bloodborne Tag: https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Bloodborne%20(Video%20Game)/works
Fanfiction.net:https://m.fanfiction.net/game/Bloodborne/
I also noticed there is a huge crossover community at FF.net. Not sure if that really would mean much to you, but here you are:https://m.fanfiction.net/crossovers/Bloodborne/12234/
As for your question about ADHD and meditating, I feel your pain here. I have this, and it takes a lot for me to focus. To get my brain even in the mindset I say the Jedi code about 3 times until my brain realizes we’re going to just STOP for a second. And this takes a sheer force of will to get it to stop and focus. For a moment. It’s fine if you can’t, I’m lucky if I can for about 30 seconds before my brain is on to whatever else I thought I needed to do next.
In answering your question, however, I realized that for me if I truly want to meditate and reach out to my entities I have to create a place in my head where I’m going. It can’t just be “breathe in, breathe out.” Then my brain starts going, “wait, am I doing the breathing right? Wait, is my mind wandering? Wait, I’m still the only person in this room, right?” Even though I know damn well I’m the only person in the room because I would have heard it, but my brain just thinks, “ooh, shiny!” And I’m gone.
If I want to actually talk to my people for more than 10 seconds I have to create a place in my head for me to actually be standing in. You would think it’d be more distracting, but apparently once I’m out of how distracting this world is I’m fine. The other place can’t be too detailed either though, otherwise I’m like, “hey, I got to get closer to that countertop because I don’t know what color it is EXACTLY, and if I don’t know right now, I may literally die.” Forget the fact I’m talking to someone, nope, I’m gone.
You will fail sometimes, and it will be fine. I do it frequently enough. I usually don’t go into meditation to talk to my entities, I just talk out loud. I suppose this could be a talking meditation if I’m focusing hard enough. This doesn’t always work. I have a particularly amusing memory of trying to pseudo meditate/talk to tell Colonel Mustang “happy birthday, Colonel” and “it is good to meet you” in Japanese on his birthday. I’d only been learning the language for 3 days. I had worked fairly hard to get to this point, so I was fairly proud of myself. Colonel Mustang had been grumpy all day, and I had a fairly good idea why. So I thought, “hey, let’s try to greet him in the language his original materials were printed in to see if it will cheer him up.” It did, for about 30 seconds, until my brain completely derailed because I knew one of the words wasn’t translating properly. I spent the next at least 20 minutes tracking the problem until I somewhat figured it out. By then though, the damage was done. He was back to being irritated, and I got the distinct impression he wouldn’t even look at me. At the time, I was disappointed. Now, it’s funny because I realize he was throwing a hissy fit. (The chaos in my head, right now.)
So, as silly as it sounds, make a happy place. A field in the middle of nowhere, a snowy plain, your favorite movie, a library, the actual area your characters are from, wherever. Create the starting place, but let the world build itself. That’s what I do. I don’t build it. I let it happen. It’s less stressful, and less distracting.
It sounds insanely difficult, but it’s not. We don’t let our imaginations run free anymore, but when we do, it’s beautiful.
Besides building your happy place, I also try to minimize distractions by going into a room where I won’t be disturbed by someone for at least a fair bit of time. I have to make sure the room is straightened first. It doesn’t have to be absolutely cleaned, but just tidied first or I can’t concentrate on anything other than, “did you just invite your friends over to a pig sty?” I turn off the lights. I get into comfortable clothing, which for me is just sweatpants and a hoodie. I get into a comfortable position, it doesn’t matter if it’s sitting or laying down, hell it can be standing if it’s what works for you. Just make sure you can stay in it without having to move. I like lighting a candle, because candles. I pull up my hoodie and just start zoning and talking. I focus on a place right behind my eyes, oddly enough. It actually slightly hurts, but I’m assuming it’s because I have strabismus, and I’m making my eyes go straight. I actually caution against falling asleep in this state. I have done it a couple times, and it’s like you bring things back from whatever gate you didn’t close. I have had the oddest dreams while falling asleep mid-meditation. That’s just me. Maybe you’ll find something else. :D
If and when you decide to get your practice started, whether with the Great Ones or whomever, and if you create a Tumblr, please let me know. Or even if you just create anything let me know so I can have a link for the next person who comes asking. This community only gets bigger when we reach out to each other! I am super happy to see new universes get people everyday. It’s super exciting!
Best of luck! I hope I helped a little, and please, please, please let me know if you have any more questions!
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