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mommytauriel · 1 year

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+ · 。~ they don’t know about us

pairing: sihtric x f! reader | genre: secret relationship, fluff, tiny bit of angst? | warnings: blood, cursing, just the normal tlk warnings, kissing, kinda suggestive at one point? (Idk) | wc: 15k+ |

synopsis: “they can’t know about us” a look into sihtric and uhtred’s sister, secret relationship and how they started and how they are now.

note: this fic was me getting back into writing, so that’s my excuse if this is terrible. I had an idea for it, and it went a whole different way and turned out longer than it was supposed to be. I do hope you enjoy it <3 My requests are open!

thank you @dailytlk for letting me use the the lovely gifs <3

You couldn't remember or pinpoint a certain moment when you realized you had feelings for him. Maybe it was when you started noticing that your eyes would always try to find him, or the tension filled eye contact that would leave you breathless. Or the way your cheeks would burn red when he would offer to braid your hair for you.

Sihtric was so charming. The small things he would do for you, the way he would step closer to you if he sensed danger, or the way he would always have you sit closest to the fire so you would be warmer.

He wasn't always like that though, he used to be distant, awkward. And he would try to not be alone with you, even though that's all he wanted. You couldn't blame him though, the first few days of knowing each other weren't the best for a first impression.

From him being with the group of danes that tried to kill you and your brother, to him being your brother's prisoner, then being one of your brothers' men. It was all too confusing and happened too fast. So, you didn't blame him when Sihtric kept his distance and avoided you.

You wouldn't admit it aloud, but it did hurt a little. When he did avoid you. You had seen him become close with Clapa, and even Hild. You weren't mean or sent him dirty looks like Halig did, so you wondered why he didn't try with you. He wasn't rude to you or anything, he just seemed to have no interest in you. And that hurt.

But you were totally wrong. He did have interest in you; maybe a little too much because he would catch his eyes following after you and it also didn't help that you seemed to fill up his thoughts and it made him nervous, he barely knew you. So why did he think of you so much?

Was it because he felt guilty for what he had done? Or was it something more? Whatever the reason was…He didn't know it.

He very much had interest in you, but he just didn't know where the two of you stood. Hild was nice and was quick to forget and forgive what happened. Clapa was easy going and called him tiny dane. Halig didn't like him, and he knew it, Halig made it obvious, and he was okay with that because at least he knew where he stood with them. But with you, he knew nothing.

You had no idea of his conflicting thoughts, you just assumed that he didn't like you. And he assumed that you wanted nothing to do with him after what he's done. God you both were so wrong.

The two of you walked on unknown ground around each other for the first days of knowing each other. You wanted to talk to him, but you didn't have near enough courage to do so and Sihtric was avoiding you to the best of his ability. And he was doing a great job until Halig told you and him to go back and warn Uhtred about the brothers, Sigefrid and Erik.

That was the first time the two of you talked. It was a few words, but it still left a long-lasting impression. You could remember it, like it was yesterday.

The two of you were quietly but quickly walking towards the camp you were staying at. Sihtric was focused on making sure the two of you aren't being followed and you were focused on the…the trees? Okay you weren't focused on anything; you were in fact internally panicking because the two of you were alone.

You had to stop yourself from glancing at him after the third time you tilted your head to look at him. You weren't the most discreet person, and you were afraid that he would notice if you didnt stop. You were walking side by side with some distance between you, but not too much distance. Sihtric wanted to be close to you if something had happened.

“I hope you don't feel offended by Halig’s words, he's normally not like that” you say quietly but loud enough for him to hear you. You tilted your head to look at him before quickly facing forward to watch in front of you.

“It's no problem My lady, I find it amusing” He replies as he looks away from the trees, he was watching to give you a polite smile. He was grateful that you broke the silence because he had no idea how he would have done it, in all honesty he probably wouldn't have.

“Oh i..i'm not a Lady" you say with a shy smile as you stumble over your words. You have been called a lady many times. But it felt different when he said it, it just rolled from his tongue so nicely and you couldn't help but feel flustered at the way he said, ‘My lady’.

“Your brother is a lord is he not” he states smoothly, with a cheeky grin.

You didn't respond to that. Instead, you looked ahead of you, a blush on your face. A blush that Sihtric was quick to notice. He couldn't help but feel proud that he could make you feel flustered so easily. Maybe now he had a small idea on where the two of you stand.

The rest of the walk was silent, not one minute of it being awkward.

The next few days the two of you didn't get a chance to talk much. He was too busy doing things for your brother and you were almost always at your brother's side. So that didn't leave much time for you to talk. And you wouldn't dare talk to Sihtric in front of your brother, he was way too protective and would assume things.

So that left you two to have longing stares, shy smiles. Well shy smiles on your part and cheeky grins on his. His stares would leave you flustered, something that Lady Gisela was quick to notice and quick to tease you about.

The next time the two of you talked was one of the worst days of your life. You were filled with fear and your hands were shaking, But Sihtric was there to help you. He was always there for you.

You were sleeping peacefully in the surprisingly comfortable bed in the inn you were staying in, In Eoferwic. You were tired from the long day you had yesterday, so you fell asleep almost immediately when you layed down.

You woke up in a jolt at the sound of loud footsteps, shouting and the sound of someone being dragged. You quickly toss the sheets off and grab your sword from the nightstand before rushing out of your room, out of the inn and into the streets of Eoferwic following the sound of shouting.

It led you to the front of Eoferwic and the sight in front of you made your heart drop in fear. It was your brother and Halig being pushed into a cage. Your grip on your sword tightens and you move to rush forward and help them, but you're pulled back by someone wrapping their arm around your waist and pulling you into their chest.

“Shh lady we can't help them if you're taken too” Sihtric whispers in your ear and at the sound of his voice you stop pushing against his arm and let him pull you back and out of sight. You wanted to go out there and help them, but Sihtric was right, you could only make it worse for them and yourself.

So, all you could do was lean back against his chest and watch your brother and Halig being sold away as slaves with tears in your eyes. When your brother started shouting that's when it broke you. You quickly turned around and hid your face in Sihtric’s chest as you let your tears fall freely. Your tears falling faster when you felt Sihtric hold you tighter and start whispering that it would be okay in your ear.

You stand in the streets for a few more moments before Sihtric pulls you away and into your room in the inn. You just let him pull you away, not fighting against it. When you get into your room you step away and wipe at your tears, embarrassed to have cried in front of him. Sihtric locks the door behind him, and you grab the chair from the small table and shove it under the door handle for extra protection.

You stood there in shock for a few moments, trying to process everything that just happened. Your thoughts raced a mile a minute, your heart started to feel heavy, and your tears came back. You were scared. Sihtric was quick to pick on the terrified expression on your face.

“Please dont panic y/n, you need to calm down” he says softly as he brings you back into his arms. You froze at first but then let yourself relax in his arms, resting your head on his shoulder. The both of you stood there for a few minutes, you calm down you're breathing and him rubbing your back.

As much as you wanted to stay in his arms you couldn't. You quickly pull away and turn your back to him as you grab your leather bag, stuffing all of your things that were around the room in it, in fast movements.

“We can't stay here Sihtric, we could be next” you tell him in rushed words, your voice cracking in the beginning from crying. Your hands were shaking as you tried to stuff one of your shirts in your bag and Sihtric noticed. He moved closer to you and pulled your hands into his, making you turn to look at him.

“We have to be smart about this y/n” he says softly but still sternly as he rubbed his thumbs over the top of your shaking hands. His hands were warm, and rough but smooth at the same time. Was that even possible? You could feel the veins on his hands, and you were sure that it would bring a blush to your cheeks if they weren't already red from your tears.

Your eyes slowly look away from his hands as they travel up to his strong forearms and to his necklace of thor's hammer. Your eyes lingered on the hammer for a few moments before they drifted up, where you locked eyes with his beautiful brown eyes.

You wanted to look away, telling yourself that it wasn't the time to be getting lost in his enchanting eyes. But you couldn't seem to look away, And neither could he. Sadly, the tension filled eye contact was broken by the sound of someone knocking on the door.

You immediately step away from the door and reach for your sword that was on the unmade bed. Sihtric quickly pulls out his ax, glancing at you before stepping closer to the door.

“It's Hild” A voice says from the other side of the door, and you immediately recognize the voice. You urgently move from behind Sihtric’s protective stance and pull the chair from under the door, your now still hands unlocking the door before throwing it open.

You let out a sigh of relief at the sight of Hild in front of you, quickly pulling her into the room; that felt hot from the actions moments before, before shutting and locking it behind her.

She had immediately brought you in her arms and explained to you what had happened and what to do next. She was going to ride to Winchester, To King Alfred hoping to get help to free your brother and Halig. And you…you were going to stay put.

You immediately refused saying that you should join her, that you couldn't stay. You feared what King Guthred would do to you too. You were shocked that she would ever suggest a thing, but what she said next shocked you even more. King Guthred said that you would still be safe here and have a room in the inn and that no harm would be brought to you. As long as you don't cause any trouble.

You of course refused. He was only saying that because he probably felt guilty for what he had done. How were you supposed to trust his words after all he had done? Hild tried to convince you more, but you didn't listen. But then Sihtric had to open up his pretty mouth ‘Its smart, we could get information from the inside.’

You and Sihtric ended up staying in Eoferwic.

The next time you saw hild was a week and half later when she rode back to Eoferwic, and she wasn't alone. She was joined by a few men, The King's warrior Steapa and your eldest brother. Ragnar Ragnarson.

You were standing next to sihtric, the two of you were in the small market looking at the tables that had random things on them. You didn't want to leave your room at the inn, you wanted to stay in, still fearful after what had happened. But Sihtric asked for you to come out of the room, he thought it would be good for you.

You were smiling at some of the necklaces that were on the table as you admired them and Sihtric was smiling at you, happy to see your smile again. He was about to offer to get you the flower pendant necklace you couldn't seem to take your eyes off, but stops when he hears the sounds of approaching horses.

You carefully set down the necklace and turn around to see who was coming, absentmindedly stepping closer to Sihtric who stood in front of you. You stepped closer to him so you could see who was coming, your hand softly gripping onto his forearm.

But you drop your hand from his arm in shock when you see who it was. It was Hild, Steapa and your big brother Ragnar. The sight of your big brother almost bringing tears to your eyes. You missed him so much and you didn't know you would see him again after hearing that he and Brida were prisoners to king Alfred.

Your eyes followed him as he continued riding out of your sight. You bring your hand up to grab Sihtrics arm as you pull him to follow you so you could get a better look at your brother. You were closer but made sure that you were still out of sight. You were so caught up with the sight of your brother you didn't notice Sihtric snatch an apple as he followed after you.

You wanted to step closer to get a better look of your brother but Sihtric softly pulled you back with a shake of the head. You frown but stay where you are, watching your brother's side profile with a sad smile, he looked healthy, not sickly like he was in the nightmares you had gotten.

“What are you doing?” You asked in a whisper when you noticed Sihtric stuffing the note that Lady Gisela had given the two of you to give to Hild, in the apple. Sihtric hands you the slice of apple he cut off and you take it while watching him with curiosity as you eat the slice.

“Well we can’t exactly walk up and give it to her, can we?” He says with a small smirk before turning around and waving over a young girl. You greet the young girl with a smile, watching as Sihtric bends down to her height and asks her to deliver the apple to Hild. The young girl nods with a smile and makes her way to give it to Hild.

“That was a smart idea” You compliment him, giving him a small smile before turning your head to look at your brother. Sihtric watches your side profile, he could tell how much you've missed your brother, how much you miss all of your siblings. When Hild got the apple she turned her head, where she saw the two of you, she gave you a small nod before looking forward.

Before you knew it the conversation was over and they were turning around on their horses and leaving, all you wanted to do was go and run to your brother, but you couldn't. You couldn't be seen with him. So you just watched them go with sad eyes, praying to the gods that they would find your brother and Halig and come back to get you soon but you knew it would be awhile until you see them again.

The first three months were hard. You were still suffering from the fact that your brother Uhtred was gone. You feared what was happening to him, your imagination ran wild and it tormented you in the night, causing you to have nightmares. Some nights you would wake up to the sound of your own cries or you would be woken up by Sihtric who heard you from the room over.

It got to the point where you were barely sleeping, you were scared from your nightmares and still scared that something was going to happen to you or Sihtric. The paranoia was the worst. Sihtric was worried for you so he tried to get you outside of the room as much as he could. But the stares of the village people and the paranoia you had made it less pleasant.

You were thankful for sihtric because even though the two of you still had your awkward moments and time filled was silence, he was still there for you. He was there to wake you up from your nightmares. He was there to sit next to you and try to comfort you the best he could as you cried for your family.

You were embarrassed at first, that he saw you in such a vulnerable position. You hated crying and you hated when someone saw you cry, hell you didn't even let your brothers see you cry. But with him it was different, he didn't make you feel silly or looked at you in pity. He was just simply there.

By the Fourth month Sihtric moved into your room. Your nightmares had gotten worse and Sihtric wanted to be close to you if anything happened, and it put your mind at ease a little. Knowing that you weren't alone. He claimed that he was fine with sleeping on your floor, he said that he's slept in worse conditions but it didn't make you feel better.

It was two weeks into him sleeping on your floor when you noticed that he also wasn't getting much sleep. You at first thought it was because of your nightmares, but it couldn't be that. You barely had them now that he was with you, his presence really helped. You then realized it was the floor. And after having a very awkward conversation that left the two of you with flushed cheeks, you decided it was best to just share the bed.

You remember how the first night was, it was very awkward.

You folded your arms over the blanket as you laid on your back, looking up at the ceiling. Hoping to find something to focus on instead of the fact that you're about to share a bed with Sihtric. The bed wasn't small, but it wasn't big. It would fit the two of you perfectly where you didn't have to worry about touching if you both stayed on your own side.

You looked away from the ceiling when you felt the bed dip and the covers move alerting you that Sihtric layed down. You had no idea if you should look at him or not, you didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable but you had a feeling he would feel that regardless.

You almost immediately felt the warmth of his body spread under the sheets. Your mind wandering to the thought of what it would feel like if he kept you warm during winter, his arms around you. You had to dig your nails in your palm to make you stop thinking about it before it went too far. You internally prayed that he wouldn't notice the flush on your face from your provocative thoughts. And if he did, you would just blame it on being warm.

You licked your suddenly dry lips and slowly tilted your head to the left to look at his side profile. Sihtric was also laying on his back, his arms also folded over the blanket, his eyes were closed and his face looked relaxed but you could tell from his tense posture he was everything but relaxed.

His hair was still braided; you have never seen him without it braided. Your eyes looked over his face, your eyes lingering on the scars on his face before looking down towards his neck tattoo. You didn't have a tattoo, when you were younger you witnessed your brother Ragnar getting one and you didn't like the sight at all. It was one of the few times you've seen your older brother shed a tear. You wondered if Sihtric cried when he got his. You liked Sihtrics tattoo, it looked good on him.

You brought your eyes back to his face only to lock eyes with his. Your eyes widen and you quickly look away from him and back to the ceiling, biting your lip in embarrassment because he caught you staring at him, well more like checking him out. The air suddenly seemed thicker in the room and you internally cursed at yourself for offering to share the bed. You waited for a few moments and Sihtric didn't say anything, and you were thankful because you didn't think you could form any proper words at the moment.

You turned to your left, laying on your side to lean over to the side table to blow out the candle with a soft blow. You decide not to return to laying on your back, you had hoped laying on your side would put some distance between the two of you. You move your hands under your cheek as you stare out into the dark room. The only sound you could hear was your own heartbeat and the occasional sound from outside.

“Goodnight Sihtric” you say quietly.

“Goodnight” His smooth voice broke the silence and seconds later you felt the bed move and the blankets shift letting you know that he also moved to lay on his side.

You quietly sighed and closed your eyes and before you knew it you were lulled to sleep. The first time in four months where you didn’t stress yourself to sleep in the fear of nightmares. Your mind was too occupied with thoughts of the man who laid on the other side of the bed to think of anything else.

It went like that for Two more weeks, the awkward small talk before bed, the shy whispers saying goodnight. The third week was when your first woke up in his arms. You had rolled over in your sleep and nestled into his side.

You woke up first, well rested and warm. You didn't notice at first until you tried to move; your eyes still closed When his arms pulled you closer into his chest. Your legs were entangled and his arms were wrapped around you, and you were panicking. You quietly and carefully freed yourself from his embrace before getting ready. Sihtric woke up confused, he always woke up first. He noticed your shy behavior during the day but didn't say anything.

It happened a lot more during the rest of the month; you waking up in his arms. Sihtric never brought it up though so you wondered if he even noticed. But he did notice and he didn't want to bring it up, he didn't want you to feel bad or uncomfortable. Because he…he liked it. He didn't like physical touch unless he was the one who initiated it. But with you it was different. He felt warm, comfortable, and safe.

It was just something that stayed not talked about. Neither of you seemed to mind it.

The fifth month was when you noticed that you indeed had feelings for Sihtric. Your small talk before bed became long talks of memories or just random things you've never told anyone. His kind actions and words felt different to you, the eye contact the two of you shared felt so much more intense. All awkwardness was gone, you could tell that the two of you were a lot more comfortable around each other.

You were also in a much better mood, your nightmares rarely happened now. The weather was getting colder, it would be winter soon. You loved winter. The stares from people didn't happen as much, they had gotten used to you. One day you and Sihtric went outside the walls of Eoferwic and found a nice field that isn't too far. It wasn't much but it made you happy so Sihtric tried to take you out to that field as much as he could.

You noticed that sihtric was starting to act differently too, he seemed happier. He wasn't quite like he was months ago. The two of you could talk for hours and not seem to get bored. You even noticed yourself starting to miss him even though he was gone for a few hours. You had gotten attached to him and it scared you a little bit.

His presence itself made you happier, the small things he does for you that would make you feel all warm inside, the long talks that you wish could last forever. Your talks before bed were your favorite. The way Sihtric would look at you as you talked, gods it made your heart flutter.

You and Sihtric were laying in bed, both of you on your sides facing each other, you had your hands under your cheek and he was holding his head up on his palm. It was starting to get chilly as winter was approaching, so you had a fire lit in the fireplace, creating a warm and cozy setting.

“So he pushed him in the lake?” Sihtric laughs, as he listens to the story you were telling, trying to picture a young uhtred getting pushed in the lake. But for some reason he just couldn't, he just pictured the uhtred now giving him an intimidating look.

“Ragnar didn't like that uhtred bested him with a sword, so he grabbed him by the back of his tunic and tossed him in” you smiled and laughed quietly at the memory you had of your brothers. You were so much younger, innocent to the pain of losing your family. You wish you could feel that peace again.

Sihtric who was admiring your face noticed how that happy gleam in your eyes faded into sadness. Sihtric moved closer to you, your legs now almost touching. You blinked a few times, clearing your mind from your sad thoughts before looking back at Sihtric, holding your breath when you noticed how close he was.

“You will see your family soon my lady, don't lose hope” He said in a soft tone as he looked into your eyes. He wished he could say more to comfort you, but he didn't know what to say, he didn't know how it feels to miss a sibling, or anyone really.

You let out a shaky breath and offer him a small smile staring into his warm brown eyes, you've decided that his eyes were your favorite thing to look at. “I won't lose hope”

“Tell me more of your childhood” Sihtric says with a smile, he loved hearing the stories you would tell him about your childhood. You smile softly and start telling him about a memory you had with your sister. Sihtric can't help but admire you as you speak fondly of your family.

You stop talking when you notice the look on Sihtric’s face, he was looking at you but he wasn't listening. You couldn't help but feel flustered under his longing gaze. He hadn't noticed the way you noticed him looking at you yet.

“Sihtric, you're not even listening to me” You laugh, leaning towards him absentmindedly. Sihtric blinks a few times trying to clear his mind from his thoughts, before looking back at you. He just now seemed to notice how close the two of you were and he couldn't help but feel flustered himself.

“Yes i am Lady, you were talking about your first horse that Ragnar got for you” He lies with a grin. He knew for a fact that you told that story last night, he just wanted to tease you a little bit.

“I told you that last night” You gasp dramatically as you slap his shoulder playfully, giving him a fake glare. Sihtric laughs when he sees your expression, while others might seem intimidated by your glare he wasn't, he thought it was adorable; which pissed you off of course.

The two of you spent the next few minutes in playful banter, Sihtric just saying things that he knew would annoy you just so he could see your reaction to it. God he loved rilling you up, And you weren't blind to his jests so you just went along with it.

After your playful banter the two of you were lying in bed, enjoying the sound of silence and the sound of the crackling from the fire. You were laying on your back, your eyes closed. Sihtric was still laying on his side as he now admired your side profile.

Sihtric would often find himself overwhelmed with feelings when he thought or looked at you for too long. The feelings he felt for you he never have felt before, It was all new for him. It was confusing but he wasn't complaining…he just hoped you felt the same way.

It was the next night when he made the first move. The two of you were laying in bed, laying closer to each other than usual. The weather was getting colder and Sihtric was as warm as a fire. You were talking and Sihtric was trying to listen but he just couldn't help but to get distracted with his own thoughts as he looked at you.

He was so enchanted with his thoughts of you that he didn't notice how you stopped telling your story or how you leaned closer to him and asked if he was okay. You were a little worried because he seemed distracted and he had this look on his face you didn't recognize.

Sihtric didn't know what came over him, but when he heard you ask if he was okay as you looked up at him with worry in your eyes, he just couldn't stop himself from what happened next. No one has ever looked at him the way you did, or asked if he was okay.

He mumbles a breathy yes and before he could stop himself he was leaning down and capturing your lips with his. It would be an understatement if you said you weren't shocked. You didn't expect it all.

But as soon as you felt his warm lips on yours all those thoughts went away and all you could focus on was him and his lips. The kiss was hesitant and just as you were starting to feel his soft lips touching yours he was already pulling away.

You were slowly opening your eyes to look up at him, even though the kiss was a few seconds it left you breathless and wanting more. The two of you stared into each other's eyes for a few moments, neither of you saying something. His brown eyes looked into your eyes and he searched for a sign to know what you were feeling, But all he saw was an emotionless stare.

He was about to open his mouth to apologize but shuts up when he feels your warm hands softly grip his chin and pull him down and sealing your lips in a desperate kiss. He closes his eyes and kisses you back just as desperately.

Sihtric felt your hand move from his chin and to his nape, only pulling him closer as the kiss heats up. Your chest was warm and you could feel the tingle in your stomach when his hands started to explore your sides, his warm hands sneaking under your shirt and resting on your bare hip.

Sihtric slowly pulled away from your soft lips, his eyes still closed as he rested his forehead on yours. All Sihtric could feel was the blood rushing through his veins and the way your, now sweaty palms were on his nape and the way your warm skin felt under his hands. Sihtric wanted to open his mouth and talk about what just happened but he decided not to. He wanted to enjoy this moment for as long as he could, the feeling he felt at the moment he has never experienced before. And you could say the same.

You lean forward to lock your lips again in an eager kiss. Sihtric hums in surprise at the feeling of your lips on his again, but he was quick to explore your lips. The sound of surprise he made made you grin in the kiss and pull away to laugh. Sihtric smiles and opens his eyes to see you already looking at him. The way you looked at him with such love was the moment where he realized he reached a point of no return. It would never be the way it used to be.

It was the Sixth month when Sihtric officially asked you to be his and him yours. Ever since your first kiss the two of you couldn't leave each other's side. You were happy and didn't want to leave his side, you truly felt happiness with him and you did not want to lose it. Sihtric, gods all he wanted was to be by your side. You made him feel true happiness and gave him the love and attention he always desired for.

It wasn't until the night before he asked you to be his, was when he realized he never asked you. The two of you did coupley things already and you never brought it up to him that the two of you weren't really together. Sihtric could just continue with the way it was but he didn't want to, he wanted to ask you to be his. And he wanted it to be special, you deserved it. He wanted you to have that happiness.

So that night before he asked you, he stayed awake longer as he thought of ideas to ask you to be his. You were already sleeping in his arms, nestled into his side; your body warm all over from his body heat. Sihtric didn't get much sleep that night as he thought of ways to make it special, there wasn't much he could do with where the two of you were and every good idea, he had he would overthink and decide not to do it. That night he ended up tiring himself out with his thoughts and he soon fell asleep. Dreaming of the two of you in a flower field as you basked in the sun, smiles on your faces. That morning he woke up with a smile, he had the perfect idea.

It was one of the colder days so you decided to stay inside. Sihtric took that as his chance to finish his perfect plan. He kissed your forehead before leaving the room. He came back a few hours later.

You were standing at the small table and cutting some bread that you would use for dinner tonight. You were dressed comfortably, well as comfortable you can get. The room was nice and warm, the fire Sihtric lit before leaving was still burning and it created a nice atmosphere.

You were starting to get a little worried as you thought of Sihtric, he has been gone for a few hours and you were starting to let your paranoid thoughts get to you. Was he okay? It's freezing out, is he freezing? Is he hurt? Did someone hurt him?. Should I go find him?

Your paranoid thoughts stop when you hear the door to your room unlock. You turn around to see Sihtric walking in and closing the door behind him. He has one of his arms behind his back and you raise your eyebrow in suspicion. He was giving you a small smile, his fur coat had some snow on it and so did his shoes, you were too distracted wondering what was behind his back to get onto him about getting snow tracks in the room.

“What's behind your back?” You say straightforwardly, tilting your head to the side to get a better look when he steps closer to you. Only to pout when he moves so you won't see.

“It's a surprise,” Sihtric laughs and gives you a small smirk, knowing that you don't like surprises. His smirk turns to a smile when he sees your pout thinking of how cute you look.

“I hate surprises.”

“I know but i think you will like this one…now close your eyes” He says giving you a nod of reassurance not just for you but also for himself. Even though it was cold out his hands were a little sweaty from his nerves. He hopes you like it…and he hopes you say yes.

You give him a look of suspicion if it was anyone else telling you to do this you would tell them to fuck off. But it was Sihtric, and you trusted him. So you close your eyes and your hands move to your sides, nervously playing with the hem of your shirt.

Sihtric lets out a shaky breath, telling himself that it would be fine. He moves his hand to grab yours but stops and looks down at his sweaty hand before rubbing it on his pants with wide eyes, hoping to clean them off. He says some encouraging words in his head before softly grabbing your hand that was on your side; praying that you don't feel how shaky his hands are.

He takes his hand from behind his back and helps you hold onto what he got you. He whispers a gentle open and watches you nervously for your reaction. Your hand tightens on what you're holding and you open your eyes, looking down at what's in your hand. You feel yourself start to feel emotional at the sight, your eyes starting to water.

In your hand was a bouquet of your favorite flowers that grew in that field that Sihtric would take you too, but that wasn't all that was there. In the middle of the bouquet was a wood carving of a flower. It was beautiful and so detailed…you loved it.

Sihtric starts to get worried when he sees you start to tear up worried that he did something wrong but it was the opposite. You have never been given flowers before, you remember seeing your father give your mother flowers when you were younger, you would always smile when you see your mother get so happy. And now here you are receiving them yourself and you couldn't be happier.

“i'm sorry..i understand if you don't lik-”

“I love them” you cut him off.

“I love them Sihtric really, I've never been given flowers…and the carving, it's beautiful” You tell him with a smile on your face as you bring them up to your nose smelling them. Sihtric feels himself calm down from the nervousness and he gives you a genuine smile at your words, happy to be the first man to give you flowers…and hopefully the last.

“I wanted to ask you something”

“You can ask me anything, Sihtric...you know that” The smile you gave him almost made all his worries go away. You looked at him with such adoration that all he wanted to do was step closer to you and lock his lips to yours. Sihtric clears his throat and those thoughts from his head and looks into your eyes.

“Will…Will you be mine?” Sihtric breathed out with a nervous smile. You feel yourself hold your breath as you stare at him. He did all this…just to ask me to be his? You think with a big smile.

You softly set down the bouquet of flowers and the wood flower carving on the table before stepping closer to him and taking his hands in yours. You stare up at him, hoping that you could express all your love you had for him in your eyes.

“ Sihtric, i would love to be yours” You tell him with a grin. Sihtric feels all his worries go away. He breaks out in a huge grin and he wraps his arms around your waist, picking you up and twirling you around in glee. You pat his shoulder and tell him to put you down in between your laughter.

Sihtric lets you down and you don't get a chance to say anything because he's already holding your face and capturing your lips with a fiery kiss that makes you feel as if your legs will give out. You feel yourself getting lost in the kiss as it only gets more heated.

Sihtric eventually pulls away from you so the two of you could catch your breath from the intense kiss that left your lips tingling and knees weak. Sihtric who's still holding your face in his hands stares at you with a grin on his face. “You don't know how happy i am to hear that”

“I guess you will just have to show me then” you tease him as you bring your hands up to rest on his shoulders. Sihtric smirks at your response.

He slowly moves his hands from your face and down your back and to your hips and down to your bum lightly squeezing it. You gasp and slap his arm yelling his name in shock. Sihtric laughs and you soon join in his laughter before he leans down and captures your lips in another kiss. The two of you, feeling nothing but pure happiness and love.

It was the eighth month when you first said I love you aloud. You knew weeks before that you loved him, but you couldn't say it aloud yet, not until the night when the two of you were celebrating yule. There wasn't much that the two of you could do in the town of Eoferwic, but Sihtric tried to make it special for the two of you.

The two of you were sitting on the fur rug in front of the small fireplace, a half full jug of wine that Sihtric may or may have not stolen from King Guthred was on the floor next to the two of you, both of your empty cups next to it.

“Can I open my eyes now?” You ask impatiently, your hands covering your closed eyes. You didn't think it was needed, your hands. But Sihtric had a feeling you would try to peek as he got the gift he got for you. A few minutes earlier you had given Sihtric his gift that you had gotten him. He didn't expect you to give him anything because he's never gotten a gift before.

When Sihtric opened his gift you could tell that he had gotten a little emotional when he opened it, and that made you get a little emotional as well. Sihtric thanked you and gave you a kiss before telling you to close your eyes saying with a smile that it was your turn.

“Not yet” Sihtric says from the other side of the room, you pout and keep your eyes closed as you focus on the sounds. You could hear some things moving around, hinting that Sihtric hid your present very well. And that's what he did, he remembered you telling him a story about when you were a child you would stay up late and search your home for your present, even convincing uhtred into joining you…only to be caught by young ragnar and sent to bed.

“Sihtric, i don't like surprises”

“ You said that the last time, and look how that went” Sihtric teases you, he grabs the small present and makes his way back to you, sitting in front of you, his legs crossed as he looks at you with a small smile. “ You can open your eyes now”

You move your hands from your face and open your eyes, immediately making eye contact with Sihtric. He smiles at you and you look down at his outstretched hand that has a cloth in his hand, used to wrap the gift. You glance up at him before you grab it, he gives you an encouraging nod, and you carefully grab it from his hands.

You carefully unwrap the cloth to see a beautiful necklace, but not just any necklace. It's the flower pendant necklace you would find yourself looking for whenever you went to the small market, it was the necklace you fell in love with months and months ago. You never did find it though when you went back to the market 3 months ago, and this is why. He had gotten it for you.

“How?...How did you know?” You ask quietly, your eyes not leaving the necklace as you continue admiring it. It was such a beautiful necklace and the fact the Sihtric had gotten it made you fall in love with the necklace and him more.

“I noticed you looking at it a few times, So do you like it?” Sihtric smiles when he sees the way you were looking at it. He already knew the answer but he wanted to ask anyway.

“Like?...Sihtric i love it, Thank you” You expressed as you looked at him with a grin on your face. Something inside of you was telling you that tonight would be the night you told him that you loved him. The way he paid attention to you warmed your heart, he noticed things others wouldn't. He made you feel special.

“ I'm glad, here let me help you put it on” Sihtric stands up and moves to sit behind you on the rug. You smile and hand him the necklace before moving your hair to the side. Sihtric sits close to you and he leans even closer, his back was against your chest and you could feel his warm breath on your bare neck.

You feel your breath hitch and your body go still when you feel his warm hands on your nape as he puts it on for you. After he clasps the clasp he rests his warm hands on your shoulders, whispering a ‘there you go’. You tilt your head to look back at him, your face so close to his, you could feel his breath hitting your face.

You didn't get to finish saying thank you before Sihtric was leaning closer to you and capturing your lips with his in a gentle and tender kiss. You felt one of his hands travel up your neck and rest on your cheek as the kiss became more hungry. You could taste the wine on his tongue and you felt yourself wanting to taste it more.

The kiss ended abruptly when Sihtric pulled away from you breathlessly. Your eyes fluttered open as you looked at him in confusion, wondering why he ended the kiss so fast. Maybe it was because he needed some air from the intense kiss when you noticed him trying to catch his breath. To be fair you were also left breathless from the kiss, like always.

“I love you” Sihtric professed as he looked into your eyes, his touch on your cheek not wavering. Sihtric started to worry when all you did was look up at him, you didn't respond right away. He thought that maybe he said it too soon and that you didn't feel the same way but really you were too shocked to say anything.

“You do?” hesitation was in your voice, something that SIhtric was quick to pick up on.

“Y/n i've never loved someone the way i love you” He vowed to you, the sincerity in his voice was clear. You twisted your body so you would be facing him fully. Sihtric gives you a small smile, starting to get nervous. He was really putting himself on the line, he's never told someone he loved them like this. The only love he felt for someone was his mother.

Sihtric is brought out of his thoughts when he feels your soft warm hands move up to hold his face in your hands. You give him a grin and slowly pull him down, locking your lips in a sweet tender kiss, pouring all your love you had for him in it. You slowly pull away, resting your forehead on his. You flutter your eyes open only to see Sihtrics eyes still close as he breathes heavy from the kiss of his life.

“I love you to Sihtric, so much”

He opened his eyes to see you giving him a grin, a grin he couldn't help but mirror. Sihtric was afraid of rejection, but you would never reject him. And now he understood that. He whispers a ‘i love you so fucking much’ before attacking your lips with his in a hungry kiss. You didn't expect it but you were quick to kiss back.

Without separating from the kiss, Sihtric moves his hands down your body and to your crossed legs, he uncrosses them and pulls you forward, wrapping your legs around his waist. You let out a loud gasp from the quick movement, Sihtric smirks before kissing you again. One of his hands moving to hold the back of your head as he gently pushes you to your back laying on the rug, him laying between your legs, his forearm supporting his top weight from fully laying on you.

Sihtric, who was too focused on the fiery kiss and the taste of your lips, didn't notice the half full jug of wine that was too close to his foot. He only noticed when the sound of the jug hit the wood floor and the sound of wine spilling with a loud clang. Sihtric pulls away from the kiss and tilts his head to look behind him. You sigh and sit up leaning back against your elbows giving him a playful disappointed sigh. “Sihtric”

“Who cares i didn't pay for it.”

It's the first month of spring and the ninth month of you and Sihtric being alone in Eoferwic and you were starting to get a little inpatient, something Sihtric noticed right away. He wanted to keep you mind off of things, off your brother who was still not back. So, he would take you out on walks every day, you would visit the flower field as much as you could. He wanted to make sure you were calm and happy. And that brings us to the present.

You were sitting on the floor on the fur rug in front of the unlit fireplace. Sihtric was sitting behind you on a chair, his hands braiding your hair. Ever since you asked him to help you a few weeks ago he found himself offering to do it for you instead. Neither of you minded it, SIhtric liked helping you and you liked it because he was better at it than you…and you liked the way he played with your hair.

Just as he ties your hair off with a thin leather ribbon, your peaceful silence is interrupted by the sound of loud footsteps leading and stopping in front of the door. Your closed eyes open and you immediately look to your door. Sihtric stands up and grabs his ax from the table before walking closer to the door. “I'll open the door”

No one has ever come and bothered the two of you, so you were a little worried from the loud footsteps and the loud knocks. You get up from the floor and grab your sword that was on the table while sihtric hesitantly unlocks and opens the door. You take a small step closer, looking for a sign from sihtric.

“You're not my sister” a deep voice says from the other side of the door, a voice you instantly recognize. You drop your sword and rush to the opened door, softly pushing sihtric away from it to stand in front of your eldest brother. A huge grin spreads over your face when you see him and an almost identical grin on his face.

“Ragnar you don't know how happy i am to see you” You exclaim as you grab his arm to pull him inside of the room, not paying attention to the other person behind him. Ragnar laughs and pulls you into a tight hug, lifting you slightly off of your feet.

Sihtric looks back at the door and sees a tall brown haired woman, she looked very intimidating and cold when they made eye contact, she gave him a stiff nod before looking back at the reunited siblings, a small smile now decorating her face. Sihtric decided then that he would not want to get on her bad side, especially with the amount of daggers strapped to her.

Sihtric fights a smile when he sees you hug your brother. He knew how much you missed him, how much you missed all of your siblings. SIhtric felt as if he knew your siblings personally from all the stories you would tell him about them. He loved the sound of your voice or the way your eyes would brighten as you talked about your family. He hated the frown that would soon follow as you remember that you siblings are nowhere near you. All of them Living in their own hell.

You closed your eyes and let yourself relax in your big brother's arms, you knew you were safe in his embrace. An embrace you missed dearly. You missed him so much, having him here, holding you brought tears to your eyes. Even though you didn't want to get out of your eldest brother's arms you needed answers. So you hesitantly pull away from the hug.

“How did you find me here? Where's hild? Did you find uhtred?” You tremble in fear and worry, your questions coming out in a rushed tone. Your mind was running wild as you thought of every bad outcome that must have happened. You were scared.

“One question at a time little sister” he hushes you. He places his hand on your cheek when he notices you start to panic from your questions. His voice was stern but gentle enough, hoping to sooth you and calm you down from your dangerous thoughts.

“We asked the turd king,” Brida stated plainly answering the first question, She would have Ragnar answer the other questions. At the sound of her voice you look away from Ragnar, to see Brida standing behind him, next to the door. Ragnar lets go of you knowing that you would want to hug her. “Brida” you sputtered out in shock. Brida smiles and opens her arms for a hug.

“I missed you” You whisper to her, your hold on her not loosening. When you saw Ragnar all those months ago you were very worried that something happened to her because she wasn't with him. It was no secret she had a foul mouth and a temper so that just made you worry even more. You had fear that she would have said something to anger the king and have herself killed.

Brida chuckles warmly and holds you tight, not wanting to let go too. While you and Brida were still hugging, Ragnar looks away from the two girls and over to sihtric who was awkwardly standing there quietly watching the exchange. Ragnar looked over sihtric with suspicion in his eyes; he didn't know much about him, only that he was Kjartan’s bastard. Sihtric noticed Ragnar’s look and he felt a chill run down his spine. He felt extremely intimidated by your eldest brother.

“Come little sister, I have to show you something” Ragnar Grins, softly grabbing your arm after you pull away from your hug with Brida. While Ragnar pulled you to the door, Brida took the chance to look around the room, her eyes stopping on the bed. It was obvious that you and sihtric slept in it. Brida smirks and glances at sihtric who was watching you.

“ Wait you didn't answer my questions Ragnar” You gave him a confused look as he basically dragged you out of the room and out of the inn, Brida and sihtric following after the siblings. You were confused…and emotional and a little annoyed that ragnar didn't answer your questions but you still let him drag you outside. But you stopped dead in your tracks when you saw who was standing a few feet from you.

You don't let your mind process the sight before you were already running towards him. The tears were already rolling down your cheeks by the time you threw your arms around his neck. Uhtred hid a wince and despite the pain he felt he hugged you as tight as he could, he never wanted to let go of you again, his little sister.

“I missed you so much, never leave me again” you sniffed, your hold on him not loosening. Hild who was standing next to Uhtred smiles big at the sight, she was so happy to see you two reunite. Ragnar, Brida and sihtric stop a few steps behind you, wanting you and uhtred to have space.

“I missed you too sister” Uhtred said in a comforting tone as he rubbed your back hoping to help stop your tears. Uhtred gave you one more big squeeze before pulling away from the hug, he still kept you at arm's length though. He wanted you close.

“Halig?” You ask in a nervous tone as if you were afraid of the answer. When you didn't see him with your brother you had a feeling that he was no longer with us, you hoped your gut feeling was wrong. But seeing the sad look in your brother's eyes you knew you were right.

“Sister, this is Finan. He was with me and Halig '' He was quick to change the direction of the conversation, not wanting to talk about it more. A pinch of sadness at his heart when he said halig’s name, it was still too painful. You noticed so you didn't say anything else about it.

“It's nice to meet you, Finan, I'm glad to see you with us” You smiled brightly at the man.

“Thank you Lady Y/n, It's nice to meet you as well. Uhtred talked about you all the time” he said with an Irish accent. He gave you a kind smile back. You look back at your brother with a worried look, already thinking about all the embarrassing things he could have told him. Uhtred smirks and hild and Finan laugh at your expression.

“Don't worry lady, it was all good things” Finan laughs as he gives you a charming smile. You could already tell that he would make you laugh many times in the future.

“Good because I would have to kick your ass if it wasn't” You smirk at Uhtred trying to give him an intimidating look but you just make him laugh and cross his arms over his chest.

“You're only saying that because you know my body is weak” Uhtred teases you. You roll your eyes mumbling how that's not true, but everyone knew it was true. Uhtred looks behind you to give his older brother a happy smile, the three of you are reunited again, now you just have to get Thyra back. Uhtreds eyes stop at sihtric who was watching you closely but he quickly looked away from you when he felt eyes on him.

“SIhtric” Uhtred greets sihtric with a small smile. When hild told him that you were still in Eforwich with Sihtric he was worried, But Uhtred was thankful that he stayed here with you, kept you safe. He would have to thank him.

“Lord, it's good to see you well” He said truthfully. It put his mind and heart at ease seeing him standing well in front of them. You would worry so much about uhtred that sihtric couldn't help but worry as well. He was happy because now you would be less stressed and paranoid, now that your brothers are back to you.

You tilt your head to look back at sihtric, you can't stop the smile that spreads over your face at the sight of him. You have been waiting for this moment for so long, to finally be reunited with your brothers again. And you were so happy that sihtric was here to be with you as well, you wouldn't have survived all those months without him.

It was a few hours after your reunion with your brothers. It was already dark outside, and you were sitting between Uhtred and hild at a long table outside. You were enjoying some ale as you listened to everyone start talking about who should keep dunholme. Every so often you would find yourself looking at sihtric who sat at a table nearby, next to Clapa.

You had to stop yourself from smiling every time you locked eyes with him. Your brothers were very observant people so you had to be careful, you didn't want them to find out about you and sihtric…at least not yet. All you had to do was tell sihtric that, and you were dreading it. You hoped that he wouldn't take it the wrong way.

Sihtric noticed something was wrong when you avoided eye contact with him for the third time. He also noticed the small frown on your face, the same frown that would appear on your face whenever you would think about something too hard. The frown didn't last on your face long, you were quick to change it to a small smile, hoping that no one noticed. Especially your brothers, because all they would do is ask you questions.

You tried to pay attention to the conversation again but you stopped when aethelwold started talking. You hated the poor excuse of a man and you had no way near enough patience to listen to him talk. You were happy that your brothers and the others were back, but you had gotten used to your nights being just you and sihtric. You wanted to be curled up in bed with sihtric, or sitting at the table eating and telling each other stories.

You tried to pay attention to the conversations, you really did. But your thoughts were distracting you, something that ragnar noticed. He didn't say anything aloud though, he knew it must be a little overwhelming for you, he didn't know what happened over the months of you being here but he had a feeling it wasn't the easiest for you.

You looked up from your half full cup of ale at the sound of familiar laughter, your eyes immediately went to sihtric who was laughing at whatever Finan was talking about. SIhtric almost immediately notices your stare and he gives you a small smile before looking back at Finan. You looked back down at your cup to hide the way the corners of your lips twitch up to a smile. Even when he wasn't trying he could make you smile.

“Uhtred,” Finan said, getting Uhtred's attention. Finan tilts his head towards King Guthred who's walking towards them.

“Uhtred will you join me please” King Guthred asks with a nervous tone. The silence after his question was filled with tension. You could feel Uhtred tense up beside you and Ragnar was clenching his cup a little too tightly and everyone was looking back and forth from Uhtred to the king, Waiting for an answer.

“Please?” King Guthred asks with a shaky breath. You look at Uhtred to see him staring blankly at the king but when he feels your stare he turns to look at you. You give him a reassuring smile and he sighs but stands up. Squeezing your shoulder softly as he walked past you and towards King Guthred. Everyone's eyes watching the two of them.

Everyone was sitting in silence as they watched the two talk. You were anxiously watching them, you were scared that your brother would do something he wasn't supposed to. And of course just as you think it, he does it. Your eyes widen and you cover your mouth, stopping yourself from laughing when you see uhtred slap king Guthred. That must have been very humiliating for him.

“Uhtred! No!” Father Beocca shouts from behind you as he stands up. Oh no the father is mad.. You think to yourself. You were worried that any second guards would come and take your brother for putting hands on the king but none came, and they continued talking. But not for long because a few minutes later the king was walking away.

Ragnar nods his head at you silently telling you to come with him. You set your cup down and stand up, following Ragnar as he walks towards uhtred. You make eye contact with sihtric as you walk past him, he gives you a small smile and you return it before looking away and standing next to ragnar.

“What did he say?” Ragnar asks as he rests his hands on his hips. Both you and ragnar looked at uhtred, ragnar wanted an answer but you just wanted to make sure he was okay.

“He said Dunholm is yours, brother.” Uhtred says with a blank stare as he turns around to face you and ragnar. You were happy for your oldest brother but you couldn't help but feel worried for uhtred. Before you could voice your thoughts uhtred was already talking.

“Sihtric” Uhtred calls out and you look at him in confusion and watch as sihtric walks towards you, standing next to you. Close but not too close that your brothers would say anything about it. You really fought the urge to reach out and hold his hand, especially when you saw the nervous look on his face.

“Lord?” Sihtric nods his head politely as a greeting.

“You lied to me” Uhtred said emotionlessly as he stepped closer to sihtric. You felt your heart stop for a moment at your brother's words. Too many thoughts immediately going through your mind.

“Lord I-I would never-” Sihtric stuttered as he looked between the three of you, his eyes lingering on you the longest before he looked back at uhtred. You can tell he was slightly panicking. Hell you were also panicking, you had no idea what was going on or what to do.

“You told me dunholm has no weakness, yet last time i was there, I saw a door along the east wall, Access to a water spring” Uhtred informs the three of you. And you watched as the realization hit sihtric’s face. You felt yourself relax a little at what uhtred said, it wasn't too serious.

“Yes, Lord, But..You could never bring an army through it.” Sitric doubted as he stepped closer to uhtred. Uhtred smiles and brings his hand to sihtric’s cheek before resting it on his shoulder and smiling at ragnar.

“I would not be bringing an army,” Uhtred smirked. You glanced at Ragnar to see him smirking too. They had a plan and you trusted them that it was the right one. You looked at sihtric, he wasn't as tense as he was before. Ragnar laughs and throws his arm over Uhtred's shoulder, leading him back to the table as they start talking about a plan, leaving you and sihtric.

Sihtric lets out a shaky breath and he turns to fully face you. You give him a small smile and gently squeeze his hand as you walk away from him. Sihtric smiles and watches you walk away from him and back to your brothers and Brida. Fighting the urge to grab your hand and pull you back to him and kiss you.

You Didn't get a chance to talk to Sihtric until late that night. You were by your brother's side the whole night as they made a plan for taking dunholm, leaving the two of you to send each other small smiles when no one was looking. The longing stares you shared reminded you of the first few days when you guys met.

You had said goodnight to your brothers and Brida and you made your way to you and sihtric’s room, not before making eye contact with sihtric, hoping that he would get the message to join you. Sihtric picked up on the way you acted tonight, you didn't want anyone to know of you and him. Sihtric was smart and he waited a few minutes before he sneaked away from the others and joined you in your guys room.

You waited for sihtric’s presence as you packed the few things you had around the room into your satchel, being extra careful when you packed the flower carving. You turned your head to the door when you heard it opening. You see sihtric swiftly coming in and closing the door behind him, a tired smile on his face.

“Hey,” He quietly greeted you, he didn't stop his strides until he's in front of you and pulled you into a tight hug. His arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you as close to him as he can. You let yourself relax in the hug, closing your eyes and resting your head on his shoulder. Mumbling; “I missed you”

“I was close to you the whole night” He chuckled, you could feel the vibrations of his laugh on your chest. Sihric smiles and kisses your forehead before responded; “But i get what you mean, i missed you to”

You made sure that the two of you kept your distance throughout the night. It was difficult, the both of you were used to being so close. Sihtric had no idea why you kept your distance from him but he went along with it. You knew you had to give him an explanation…but you just didn't know how to say it.

“Sihtric”

“Yes?” He answered with a hum, his hold on you not wavering. He liked having you close to him, so close that he could feel your heartbeat against his chest. The sound of your beating heart comforted him.

“I…don't think we should let the others know about us” You hesitated at first but you knew it would be easier if you just spit it out and get the conversation over with.

“Oh” Sihtric whispered, if you weren't so close to him you were sure you wouldn't have heard it.

“Is there a reason why?” SIhtric asked calmly, trying to hide how upset he got over those 11 words. To anyone else they wouldn't have noticed the sadness in his tone, but it was different for you. You knew Sihtric better than anyone else. You felt your shoulder droop when you heard the sadness in his voice.

“My brothers are very protective…I don't think I'm ready for them to find out” You say truthfully. It was true, your brothers are very protective of you and you were worried that they would say or do something that would scare sihtric away. You know your brothers wouldn't do it in a malicious way, they would only do it thinking they are protecting you, but sometimes they can take it a little too far. You didn't want sihtric to go through that.

You pull away from the hug and bring your hands up to hold sihtric’s face. You could tell that he was upset and that was the last thing you wanted. You gave him a reassuring smile and looked into his brown eyes as your thumb softly rubbed against his cheek.

“Its not going to be for long sihtric, just until things cool down”

Sihtric understood where you were coming from. You had told him many stories about how protective your brothers would be over you, and he knew you were just doing it to protect him. But that didn't stop the negative thoughts from collecting in his mind. Sihtric cleared his throat and answered you, his tone emotionless.

“I should get my things; it would be suspicious if i slept with you tonight.”

You didn't get to talk to sihtric over the next 2 days. Those 2 days were spent planning to take Dunholm and the journey to Donholm, the whole time you were by your brothers and bridas side and sihtric was by clapa”s and finan”s side. You tried to talk to him with the few chances you had but sihtric was inconveniently always busy and doing things for your brother.

It was hard not being able to be by his side all the time, or being able to have those ridiculous conversations that would have you talking for hours. But by far the hardest thing was how lonely it was at night. You didn't like sleeping without sihtric by your side, he made you feel comfortable. He made you feel safe.

And with sihtric not sleeping next to you, you didn't get much sleep the past two nights. You tried to rest but your mind kept you up. Not only were you missing sihtric you were also worrying about the battle at Dunholm. You hoped that you hid your tiredness and worry well but there was one person who knew you better than anyone. And that was uhtred. With one look he could tell something was bothering you.

You were currently walking alongside your brother Uhtred, ahead of the others and the small army. Uhtred was leading the march because he knew the way for the plan and you decided to walk with him, you didn't want him to be alone and plus you missed him. Uhtred appreciated your presence dearly.

“What's on your mind sister?” Uhtred asked you, turning his head to glance at you before looking ahead. You look away from the grassy hill to look at your brother. .

“I’m just worried about what's going to happen at dunholm…It's been a while since we had a battle like this” It wasn't a lie, You were worried. But it wasn't the whole truth but you couldn't tell that to uhtred.

“We will be fine sister, stop worrying” Uhtred said in a reassuring tone. You just hum in acknowledgment and go back to looking at the view. You could feel stares on your back and you knew that one of them was sihtric. You were comforted by the fact that sihtric still had his eyes on you, making sure you were okay.

“Were you okay while I was gone?” Your brother asked as he looked at you with a worried look of his own. You thought it was funny how he was just telling you not to worry and here he is, worrying himself.

“I won't lie, it was hard at first, I was so scared and paranoid. But it got easier with time” You pondered aloud, Thinking of the struggles over the months he was gone. You felt a little guilty, your struggles were nowhere close to how your brother, Halig and Finan struggled.

“I'm glad sister, i would never forgive myself if something happened to you and i wasn't there to stop it”

“I am fine brother, Don't speak of such things” You give him a small smile and gently bump your shoulder into his, making sure it wasn't the injured one before doing so. Uhtred laughs and bumps his shoulder back into yours, a little harder than you expected, making you almost trip over.

Uhtred lets out a loud laugh and helps you stand straight, stopping you from falling. You give him a dramatic glare that only makes him laugh more. Your glare turns into a grin at the sound of your brother's laugh. You missed his laugh, his smile, his jokes. You soon joined him in laughter.

“And sihtric?” Uhtred asked you with a small smirk after the two of you calmed down from your laughter. Your neck almost snapped with how fast you turned your head to look at your brother. Why is he asking about sihtric? you think with a panicked thought.

“What about him?” You internally curse at yourself from how fast you respond, and the way your voice goes higher doesn't help. Uhtred hides his smirk and gives you an innocent smile.

“You guys were alone for many months, was it okay?…did anything happen?”

“Everything was okay, nothing…nothing really happened” you tell him with a nervous smile. Uhtred looks and your side profile when you turn to look away from him, he has a smirk on his face that you didn't notice. Uhtred just responds with a snicker.

The trek up the mountain to Dunholm was hard. It was even more difficult because of how dark it was. But it was nowhere near as hard as it was when you had to part from Ragnar and Brida. You knew that when you hugged them both that that could be the last time you hugged them or the last time that you would see them.

You tried to distract yourself from those negative thoughts. So you went over then plan in your head again, again and again as you ran up that mountain and hid in the bushes. Wait at the wall until they come for water, sneak into dunholm, kill Kjartan’s men, Kill Kjartan, Find your sister.

It was a very straightforward plan. A plan that you hoped worked.

You were by Hilds side as you crouched behind the bushes. On the other side of you was Sihtric, he was so close to you that you could reach out and hold his hand and no one would see, and that's what you did. You reached out and took his shaking hand in yours. Sihtric immediately turned his head to you when he felt your touch. You give him a small smile before focussing back on watching the men on the wall.

You felt his hands stop to shake and hold onto yours tighter. His hands were clammy but you didn't mind. You knew he was nervous, this couldn't have been easy for him. Coming back to this place, Knowing that everyone had the same goal. To kill His father. You knew that sihtric had little to none love for his father in his heart, But this still must be hard.

You look away from the men and to uhtred, waiting for his signal to run towards the wall. You saw the concentration and determination on your brother's face. Uhtred looked at you and hild and nodded; the signal. You give sihtric’s hand one more squeeze before letting go and quietly sprinting after hild and uhtred.

When you get to the wall you quickly put your back against it and let out the breath you were holding. The cold stone feels nice against your back and palms. You look across the grass and towards the bushes where the others were at. Your eyes looking at sihtric who's waiting for the right time to run towards you.

Sihtric nods towards Father Beocca before he stands up and starts sprinting towards us. You feel your body tense up in fear when sihtric trips over his own feet. You helplessly watch as sihtric looks up at the men on the wall in fear praying to himself that they wouldn't notice him. Thankfully they didn't. Sihtric quickly got to his feet and ran to the wall, taking the spot on your left.

You watch as the others run over as well, and you let yourself relax a little knowing that you weren't caught. The first step in the plan was almost a success. Now all you had to do was wait until the morning when they opened the small door to collect some water. Hopefully it wouldn't be too long of a wait.

Sihtric tilts his head to the side to look at you. Your eyes were closed as you leaned your head back against the stone wall, you were trying to calm down your nerves. The moon was reflecting against your face and you looked absolutely beautiful in Sihtrics eyes.

Sihtric brushed his fingers against yours before holding your hand. You opened your eyes and tilted you heard to look at at sihtric, locking eyes with him. You give him a faint smile and lace your fingers with his. Looking into his warm eyes you knew you would be just fine with him by your side.

Before you breached, dunholm uhtred told you, well more like demand you that you have to stay by his side or by the others side during the battle. You just responded with a roll of your eyes, you and uhtred both knew that you could protect yourself. But Uhtred just wanted you to be safe.

Despite the small annoyance you felt about Uhtred’s over protectiveness, you listened to him. So during the battle you were by Sihtrics' side. Fighting side by side, making sure that the other was okay. One second you were fighting against one of Kjartans men and the next you were standing next to Sihtric as a Square formed, For Ragnar and Kjartan.

You feel anger and disgust when you see Kjartan standing in front of your brother as he shouts for one of his men to give him a shield. Your Grip on your sword was starting to hurt but you didn't care. All you could focus on was The sound of shields and swords clashing and the sounds of shouts of the people around you.

It felt as if you were stuck in place as you watched the battle in front of you. You couldn't bring yourself to shout out like Brida or uhtred. You just stood there watching. Tears of anger forming in your eyes at the words Kjartan was saying about your sister and parents.

You move closer to sihtric and he wraps his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to his chest, His eyes not leaving the fight in front of him. You flinch when Ragnar stabs his sword in Kjartans arm. Your jaw clenches when Kjartan yells for his sword. You watch with a blank stare as Ragnar swings his sword down at Kjartan.

You felt Sihtric flinch at every swing of Ragnars sword. You couldn't watch after the second swing and turn away and lay your head on Sihtric’s chest, trying to drown out the screams and the awful sound of ragnars sword meeting Kjartan’s body. One of your hands moving to sihtric’s back to rub up and down, hoping to comfort him in some way.

You squeeze your eyes shut and flinch when you hear ragnar's shout of anger. You couldn't bring yourself to turn around and see the sight, you wouldn't be able to handle that. You were feeling many things at that moment, happiness that your family has been avenged, disgust from the fight, tiredness from the battle. And most of all you felt sadness, sadness because Kjartan’s death did not make you feel any better.

You felt one word, Overwhelmed. After the brutal death of Kjartan your sister stepped out, surrounded by wolves. You wanted to cry at the sight of your sister and you did when she yells in agony and runs back inside, her wolves following after her. You look at your brothers, Uhtred has tears rolling down his face and Ragnar's face is covered in blood but you could still see the tears.

You tried to talk to your sister again but she just stayed silent as she looked away from you, her wolves staring you down. You left her alone, it was obvious she wasn't ready to talk to you and you would respect that even though all you wanted to do was bring your older sister in your arms.

But instead of being in your sister's arms you were in Sihtric’s arms. After trying to comfort your brothers and failing you decided to look around for sihtric, you knew he needed comfort as well after what he witnessed. But it was no surprise that you couldn't find him, You didn't know your way around dunholm.

So you were very thankful when Sihtric randomly appeared in front of you. You could tell by the look on his face that he needed to be with you, alone. You didn't question him when he took your hand and pulled you away from the eyes of others and up the stairs to an empty guard tower.

You didn't say anything either when sihtric locked the door behind him and pulled you down to sit on the stone floor, Both of you leaning back against the stone wall. You could hear the loud talking of the drunk men celebrating the victory. You stretch your legs out in front of you, bumping your foot against sihtric’s.

You wanted to say something but you didn't know what to say, So you just closed your mouth and rested your head on sihtric’s shoulder. There was a tense but comfortable feeling in the air, Sihtric knew you wanted to say something and that you were waiting for him to make the first move. So he took your hand in it and rested it on his lap.

“I dont think im ready to talk about it” Sihtric whispers but you hear him perfectly.

“That's okay, i'll be here when your ready”

“I'll always be here no matter what” You promised as you squeezed his hand, tilting your head to look at his side profile. Sihtric can't stop the smile from forming on his lips at your words. He tilts his head as well, your lips almost touching. Sihtric twists his body to face you and brings his hand up to cup your cheek before sealing your lips in a gentle kiss.

You felt sihtric pour his emotion in the kiss. A once gentle kiss turned into a desperate and heated kiss. The hand he had on your cheek traveled to your nape, tangling his fingers in your hair, pulling you closer.

“I love you” SIhtric whispered against your lips. The feeling of the kiss was lingering on your lips, You let out a heavy breath and opened your eyes. SIhtrics brown eyes were already looking into yours.

“I love you” You breathed out, still trying to calm down your breathing from the kiss. It also didn't help that every time sihtric told you he loved you it felt like you couldn't breathe. Sihtric smiles at your words and moves his hand for your hair to tuck a few strands of hair behind your ears.

“I'm sorry” You muttered after a few moments of silence. Sihtric who moved back to leaning against the stone wall looks at you in confusion, not knowing why you would be sorry. “What for?”

“For wanting to hide our relationship, it wasn't fair to you” you apologized, the more you thought about it over the past two days the more you realized how unfair it really was to him. You didn't even ask for his opinion, you just made the decision yourself.

“I understand why you did it, It's okay” He reassured you, softly gripping your chin with his thumb and pointer finger to make you look at him instead of the floor. Your anxiousness drifting away at the sight of his beautiful eyes.

“I don't want to hide anymore” You confess to him. Just hiding your relationship for 3 days was hard enough, you couldn't imagine doing it for longer. Before sihtric could open his mouth to say something you were already saying something.

“I never want to hide my love for you again” You whispered as you tilt your body to face him, your hand cupping his cheek, your thumb softly grazing over a small scar. SIhtric out of instinct leans closer to your hand, not breaking eye contact with you. Those words left a heavy but nice feeling in his heart, Gods he loved you so much.

“Does that mean i can kiss you in front of the others?” Sihtric jokes with a teasing smirk as he leans his face closer to yours.

“Hey now! Don't push your luck” You laugh and playfully push his shoulder away from you making him go back to leaning against the stone wall. Sihtric joins you in your laughter

“Let's start off slow, like holding hands. Can you do that?” You smile softly, bumping your shoulder into his. Sihtric felt warm inside seeing your beautiful smile, it made him forget about all of his problems, he could only focus on you.

“Oh i can definitely do that” He smiles with a flirty tone. He takes your hand in his and brings it to his lips, placing a gentle kiss on your knuckles as he winks at you. You felt your cheeks burning from his actions.

“Anything for you” He says in a much softer tone, leaning down to kiss your forehead before wrapping his arm around you and pulling you closer to lay your head on his chest. You hum in acknowledgement and watch as the pretty sunset peaks over the wall.

All the worries you had about the future, about your sister, about your brother's reaction to you and sihtric’s relationship drifted away as you sat in silence watching the sunset. Being in sihtric’s arms gave you a sense of clarity and peace that you never wanted to lose. You knew that whatever happened in the future you would be fine, because you had sihtric by your side and he never plans to leave it. With or without your brother's approval.

ཻུ۪۪ bonus:

Unknowingly to the both of you that while you guys were cuddling and watching the sunset, your two brothers were resting by the fire inside, their newest topic being you…and sihtric.

“How long do you think it's gonna take until they realize we already know” Ragnar chuckles as he takes a sip of his ale. After the conversation with Uhtred that just made him feel even more down he knew he had to change the conversation, and he knew the perfect topic. Their little sister.

Uhtred immediately knows what his brother is talking about. Uhtred knew you very well and he already had suspicions about you and sihtric when he noticed how you would glance at him ever so often the day he got back, and he knew he was right by your strange behavior and the way you responded to him when he asked you those questions.

“Hopefully not too soon, Sihtric is being extra polite…i think he might be scared of you” Uhtred smirked as he tilted his cup towards Ragnar before taking a large gulp. Thinking about how polite he's been the past few days.

“Should we scare him a little?...threaten him?” Ragnar smiled mischievously, already thinking of a few ideas to scare sihtric. Ragnar set his cup on the wooden table and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees as he looked at his brother.

“No, I can tell he makes her happy, And he protected her when we couldn't” uhtred shook his head as he glanced at Ragnar before looking towards the burning fire. Uhtred could tell that you really cared for sihtric and the fact that sihtric did in fact kept you safe made uhtred feel a lot better about you and his relationship.

“And besides the last time I threatened one of her ex’s she didn't talk to me for a week…which is a lot to her because it seems like she can never shut up” Uhtred added when he noticed Ragnar thinking a little too hard on his last words.

And Uhtred was right, Ragnar did think too hard on what uhtred had said. Ragnar didn't like the fact that he wasn't there to protect her, He had missed out on so much he missed how it would be him protecting her.

“Yeah well at least you didn't get pushed into the mud” Ragnar scoffed as he shook his head and leaned back in his chair as he remembers that day. There was a boy who lived close to them, he was the youngest son of the weaponsmith, And Ragnar noticed how that boy always seemed to appear when you were around. Raganr did not like it.

“I Don't blame her on that one…you deserved it” Uhtred snickers as he remembers the furious look on your face as you pushed your eldest brother into the mud before running off to your father to tell him how angry you are. While the son of the weaponsmith was running to his father, scared that Ragnar was going to chase him and feed him to the ‘cannibals who live a few villages away if he didn't leave you alone’....there were no cannibals but the boy did in fact leave you alone.

“Who knew that a six year old y/n was so strong?” Ragnar chuckles as he grabs his cup from the table and drinks from it. Ragnar couldn't help but smile at the memory, he did in fact deserve to get pushed into the mud for scaring that boy but it was no way near as bad as the scolding he got from his mother when he finished cleaning himself in the stream.

“Our little sister can handle herself, i taught her well” Uhtred smirks as he looks back on the memories over the years.

Ragnar chooses to ignore what uhtred said about how he taught her well because everyone knows it was really ragnar. He instead focuses on ‘our little sister’. He couldn't help but feel a little emotional as he thought about it, he had missed out on so much in your life. You weren't that small girl that needed her big brother to help her with everything. No, you were older now, and knew how to take care of yourself.

“Our little sister isn't so little anymore.”

note:

Okay so like i kind of love this fic, and I genuinely like how it turned out. I hope you guys do too!

Please comment if you would like to be added to my tlk taglist or my Sihtric taglist.

I’m also currently working on a Aethelstan story, it's going to be published on wattpad soon. I'll try to also publish it here if you guys want?

I really like the plot and story I made with this fic and i wouldn't mind making a full on story for it, just let me know if you guys would want that or just other parts.

Also, i do apologize if sihtric seems a little ooc, i was just really trying to explore another side of him? But like I said before I do hope you enjoyed this fic! Likes, comments and reblogs are very appreciated.

#the last kingdom #the last kingdom x reader #sihtric kjartansson #sihtric x reader #sihtric imagine #the last kingdom fandom #the last kingdom fanfic #arnas fedaravicius #sihtric the last kingdom

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