#I will probs come back to this and have more thoguhts

[theladyyavilee]

someone might have already said this, I’ve been a little mia, buuut now that I have thought about it more, the couch scene actually makes so much sense?

the thing is, we’ve only been considering the couch metaphor from a meta standpoint - and don’t get me wrong, that is def an important aspect and they have been using it as such, for examply by showing us that the answer to the couch question is eddie’s couch (thank you 6x12 couch scene my most beloved <3) - but in that we are kinda forgetting that in contrast to the other metaphors (most notably heart and water metaphors <3) the couch metaphor first and foremost isn’t a meta metaphor, it is buck’s metaphor and thereby the only metaphor that the characters are actively aware of and so while the meta aspects of it definitely are at play (and in my opinion do hold up, because of course he has grown, but not yet enough and so this time the couch choice is half his own, while half still put on someone else again, and he still doesn’t see the one right in front of him) more importantly buck is actively trying to use the couch metaphor and is actively trying to put it into play by being proactive, but it also means that the couch metaphor is not infallible, because buck is not infallible

from buck’s perspective, natalia is a good candidate and he didn’t compromise on his own boundaries for her and she still came back and stood beside him through the emotional mess that was kameron having the baby even tho that was what originally made her run - of course he would want the couch metaphor to work for the two of them (people have said it before, but it bears repeating: buck is not omniscient, he does not see the narrative signs for why he and natalia are doomed!) and of course that would make him actively put the couch metaphor into play, it’s almost like a test, like him asking can we actually ‘pick a couch’ together that works for both of us synonymous with him asking if they actually fit (which is a big step up, because it IS him making that choice and him recognizing that ‘picking a couch’ kinda needs to be a both partners kinda thing and a compromise, not him accepting couches that are hoisted on him) - and only s7 will tell us and more importantly buck the answer to that, even tho we as the audience know that the couch buck is at ease on is already out there and waiting for him to see it <3

#9-1-1 #911 spoilers #evan buckley #couch beloved #911 meta #buddie #kinda #couch is always buddie xD #anyways #I don't know if this makes sense to anyone #and whether or not the general idea has already been pointed out by someone else #because I have spent most of the last two days hacking up my lungs akldakjahskj #BUT #I had this realization today while thinking about the balcony couch question scene and buck's demeanor during it #he is actively trying to make the couch metaphor work for him #and that is not a bad thing #because it is him actively going into a relationship inquisitive and wondering whether it might work and NOT just letting a relationship #happen to him and expecting it to be the end-all perfect fairytale #so yeaaah growth <3 but not quite there yet #I will probs come back to this and have more thoguhts #but yeah #taht is where I am at <3

[tyto11]

i’m tired

i folded my laundry but haven’t put it away so it’ schilling with my on my bed

i am tired so if i stop making sense or just don’t bother with stuff like typos please exucse me

pms is horrible. so bad. body preparing for just a terrible time with a terrible time. i hate it. how to uninstall. 

want to hold a baby. thanks hormones. squishy smiley huuman

why so tired only 12:25 woke up at 12:00 pm went sleep at

uh

12:41 apparently wh 

i’m so well rested how’d this happen why body, why are you tired

ah

friday i had this weird episode of being so fucking tired and spending half an hour on the verge of sleep while not actually sleeping, cured only by excusing myself to the bathroom and going on my phone so the light would wake me up enoguh to make it through the last block

afterwards i was really weirdly weak and shaky? idk what it was i’m not sick and i ate a crap ton of potatoes and an egg 

think stuff was just Too Much, like the class was too loud, or stuff was too bright, smth like that? i’ve had a thing like this before except i had a vasovagal faintign spell but i didn’t actually pass out and i got blood and urine tests and things, and the doctor took a look at me and said that nah, nothin’ wrong, probs just coincidence with the situation (standing too long or smth lie that forget the specifics)

being shaky is not fun it makes eveything feel so much more desperate

like if you drop this thing then picking it up is so much harder and the whole thing is just a;dkfja;sldkf

winter formal is coming up, idk if i wanna go, no one knows if they want to go. everyone is saying i’ll go if people go but everone’s so indecisive

last time a teacher thoguht me and somef riends were doing drugs in a stairwell we were doing 

uh what’s it called

those jellybeans that taste bad but sometimes good and the bad and good ones taste teh same

i don’t remmeber

tbh i’m kinda shaky now? i’m stressed for no reason, i rested the entire day, ate enough, drank enough water, slept well, okay body

bad jellybeans name what’s it called

beanboozled that ‘s the turd 

oh shaking stopped yayyy

i have vague memories from last night of gently spooning my lamb stuffy. i woke up in the spooning position in the night and just gently tucked my hand across her belly; when i’m tired i get really affectionate to everything adn everytone and show it physically, i drape mysel f over people, nuzzle up to them,, luckily i’m only that sleepy near friensd or family, pretty sure if

oh 

oh i just figured out why i cry when i’m super tired

it’s because when i’m super tired at night and statr crying it’s be cause there’s no one there and my sleepy brain is lonley oooohhhhhhh

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh that’s why i sleep so much better when i’m with other people i’m just super lonely that explains so much

the shakin’g s back 

but just in my legs okay

i should get to sleeping i’m stoo tired to do anything functioning right now

there’s like four people who read these, idk why, hope y’all have good sleep, take care of yourselves

i guess i’l just put my laundry on the floor

floor is clean enough i lint rolled it like two days ago

time to go listen to ear cleaning asmr to trigger that reaction i’ve enstilled in my body after over a year of sleeping to asmr every single fucking night

i made a sleep button in my rain by accident and the button presser is asmr 

oh no my pig is upside down lemme go help porky

his name isn’t porky i have a nother pig named porky he waent with me to new ork

hes right stide ip time to sleep now

oh i got some new yearrings yesterday they made out of vintage buttons they were $5 my ears can take whatever metal you want to put in them, whatever plasitc, they don’t care i love that baout my ears

didnt brush my teth but i flosesed earliy today htats good eonugh okay good niiiiight

#tyto stuff #first time i've had an epihpany typing one of these

[asktheguardians]

Ch.30 Big Race

Back on Excalibur hour has passes by and the others are looking for Shadow after that eating. Skyla, Holly, and Guider we’re flying around looking everywhere but Guider then see him on a pole sleeping on it. He then shouted at him to wake him up which made him fall onto Chase’s arms.

Guider: Shadow it’s almost time for your race! Look at the time! Shadow: Well…I don’t know where the race is??? Also thanks for catching me Chase. Chase: No prob *drop him on the ground* He He Guider: It’s ok I’ll take you all there. Klondike: Wait what about us? Guider: Oh you two can come we prepared like chairs for those who can’t fly and stuff. Skyla: Let’s Go! *Both Holly and Gloomy fist pump the air*

As they all hurry to the big race that Shadow accepted to join in, Alex is having trouble with the chief of the village.

Chief of Excalibur: I do feared he is coming back again….at a time like this….on this day…. Alex: Please Chief we can help I brought the Guardians. Chief of Excalibur: Yes but…He might still hold the grudge….

other place…

Crazh: Dude why are we even here for it’s just a bunch of mountains and fogs? Leo Jet: Cause today is the day we’re going up there through those fogs! Zerk: You’re crazy aren’t ya. Rumor heard if you go in that fog you be heading to a mountain to your death. Leo Jet: And I know my way through it! Just follow me alright and try to catch up!

Leo then jump off the ship and open his wings which he then leads the way to the fog while Zerk follow him by sailing the ship. Crazh still question himself what is with Leo and this fog.

Horns began to play and the crowds are going wild when the race is about to began. Shadow is rushing into the race which he is quickly signing the paper in front. The announcer began a speech to start the race while the others are sitting in the chairs to watch the race but still waiting for Shadow to show up.

Announcer: And to tell you all today is a special event and we have a very special guest! A new Knight of the Wind is here to join in the race! Once he is here we will began the race…..any minute now….

Shadow is rushing in the hall running fast as he can but he keep thinking he is getting lost in the hall to the race. The crowd are questioning and still waiting for him.

Klondike: I really hope he isn’t just running in some hall in circle. Chase: Maybe he’s just nervous? Klondike: Well I guess or he ate too much from that food….those things are just too good.

He is running more faster and panting alot in the halls as he heard the crowd voice.

Shadow: I’M HERE *panting and breathing* I just have to use the bathroom sorry!

Announcer: AND THE KNIGHT OF THE WIND HAS ARRIVED! *crowd cheering*

Shadow felt embarrassed but all he can do is just wave at the crowd and walk to the starting line by Bolt. Klondike then notice he’s not wearing his glasses but Gloomy poke his hand with his glasses in her hand.

Klondike: Gloomy why you holding his glasses he’s gonna need that? Gloomy: He got goggles that are use for this race so he told me to hang on to them. Guider: Don’t worried if anyone wears glasses we give them goggles like glasses that are used only in sports with the same glasses view. Beside I kind of lost my glasses when it falls of my face which made these now. Chase: Very Interesting…..*put his glasses on* wow his eyes are blurry and giving me little headache.

Shadow then see Bolt and gave him a pat on the shoulder saying good luck but Bolt gives him a hand shake.

Announcer: Looks like our racers are very pumped up for this race! Now that our last racer is here we can began the big race! Now Racers! Get Ready To Fly!

5….4…….3…………2…………1…

GO!!!!!!!!

The racers then run off the bridge and flap their wings and soaring fast to the line. Shadow then follow along and then jump far. As he open his wings he’s coming up to the racers fast. He then coming up to one till he notice a Soraz on the side is holding a camera shooting a shot of the racer. Back at the starting line it showed the racers on screen so people can see the race and knows who’s in first and last place. It then showed who’s in place and it showed Shadow in last place. But then slowly catching up to 6th place. Back in the race Shadow then seeing the Soraz diving into the clouds which he thinks it’s the line so he follow them which turns out there is an obstacles in the way.

Announcer: Looks like this might be his first time racing in the Sky Race? To tell you all how it goes there will be obstacles along the race and you must go through them. Letssee if the knight of the wind can go through them!

Skyla: Man I wish I can join the fun! Those obstacles look so easy and fun! Klondike: You could of ask. But these might be easy or really fun for him since he train himself to flying. Guider: Lets see those training helps him in this.

Shadow then flying through the obstacles fast as in he zipping through them like a fly. He is now in 4th places and is catching up faster. They then came to the next course which looks like a bunch of rain clouds. As he fly in he notice it isn’t rain it’s hailing. the hail hitting his wings is felt like he’s getting pinch by them.

Announcer: Looks like the Knight of the Wind is getting hailed on in that course. In this course you have to go through the hail storm which felt like your getting hit by pebbles or something?

Shadow *on screen*: HE’S NOT WRONG!

Skyla: Come on Shadow you can handle those hails!!!

The hail storm is slowing him down which he then felt as if his body heat is getting hotter and hail hitting him getting lighter like melting ice. He then continue on and going fast through the storm. As he’s catching up he then see Bolt right in front of him.

Shadow: Hey Bolt! Bolt: For a new knight you’re not that bad and i can’t believe you’re in-

Announcer: THE KNIGHT OF THE WIND WENT THROUGH THOSE HAILSTORM FAST AND NOW IN 2ND PLACE!!!

Shadow: Huh didn’t know there were people in front earlier I thoguht i might be in 3rd or 5th or something Bolt: Welp we’re in the final course lets see if you can beat it.*soaring to the course fast*

As Shadow then stop for a sec to take a look at the course his eyes wide open which showed him a huge pillar made of clouds and Bolt is flying way high up.

Announcer: OH MY GOD! We’ve have arrived the final obstacle of the race the Pillar of Bravery! You can’t go around it you must fly as high as you can and come down sonic speed to the finish line which is straight ahead! But mess it up when coming down will cause serious injuries so be careful racers!

Klondike: what's so brave about that thing? Guider: Well this test how brave and how skills the flyers can be when coming down really fast and try to turn up using that speed and go straight to the finish line. Those who tried it get their wings broke and body very injure so for example it’s like how you guys have those car crashes. Skyla: Hmmmm!!!!! I wanna join in so bad!!!! *Holly patting Skyla head* Chase: Let’s see if Shadow can do that?

Shadow then fly up meeting up with Bolt as both going first and second place back and forth which is making the crowd going wild. As they reach to the top Shadow then look down seeing the finish line. Bolt then takes the lead going down fast and so he goes in for the dive with his wings straight fold coming in faster which then meet with Bolt.

Shadow: This race is amazing! If you or me win this race I wanted to say you Soraz are amazing and you’re a great flyer mate! It’s good to race with you! Bolt: In all my life I never heard anyone said that for a long time! And it’s an honor to meet and race you Shadow! You may not be a Soraz but you got the spirit of one!

As they both look down coming in mach speed both have open their wings and created a huge sonic boom coming in very fast to the finish line.

Announcer: AND THE WINNER IS!!!!!

When he about to announce they come into the finish line with a huge wind right behind them blowing away the crowd off their seats and no one look to see who won when the cloud uncover the screen.

Announcer: Um…looks like we can’t tell who won so that’s why we have the camera here in the first place! Let’s see that in slow motion!

Everyone seeing the screen and all are quiet and the other racers come in the finish line to see who won.  When they pause the screen they then zoom in and turns out the winner is-

Announcer: l-looks like i-it’s…IT’S A TIE!!!!! For the first time it’s a tie!!!!

Bolt: Wow….you are really something Shadow *let out his hand for a shake* Shadow: *panting* yeah you too mate *shake his hand*

Announcer: What a good sportsmanship folks well we can just say this but racers! All of you did amazing out there Congratulation!

Everyone clap their hands and the racers are waving at the crowds and patting each other on the shoulder and back.

???: You Gotta Be Kidding Me a Tie!!!! Have You Gotten Slower Knight!!!

Everyone looking around and Shadow is looking fast ashe know that voice anywhere. He look up and see who it is.

Chief of Excalibur: I’ve fear he’ll be here… Alex: You!

The person walks to the announcer and then grab the microphone.

Shadow: Leo Jet! *pull his axe out*

Leo: Hello everyone….do any of you miss your old friend Leo?

(Ch.31 Revenge)

#story #The Guardians

[zhouwerthoughts]

the finalest final of finals

1/23/17

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” 

~Barack Obama

wooooo its over friends

I should write longer posts so ill start now since that stuff is less hectic

Well, finals are over now and it’s time for me to look back on my failure as a student and try to improve ya feel

1st Hour: stats - Got an 88 this semester, I did all my homework legitimate and studied a bit. However, First hour always somehow became my designated sleep hour, meaning I missed many a lecture and its worth of notes. For next semester, I’ll make sure to do all the extra credit practice quizzes early to avoid risk of getting cut off by the deadline, sleep more, and prepare better because its actually a pretty hard class for me

2nd Hour: orch - nothing much to say here easy 100 fun times and pieces are cool. I guess ill talk about our upcoming concert as well right now. The pop pieces we’re playing are... to be honest, kind of underwhelming, but I guess I can’t fairly judge until we play with ezme. Verdi is so much fun, but still not as fun as Tchaikovsky XD. Mahler... I wish I was more mature and patient to fully enjoy it, as it really is a beautiful piece, I’m just a bit too jumpy to stay focused while playing it :P

ok im getting intensely drowsy so if this turns weird dont blame me im weird

3rd hour: french - 89.5, barely got an a so this was absolutely horrid lol like wtf did i do first quarter and that final was horiblye hard like ok rip maybe i didn’t study enough next semester goals sleep more cuz im always sleepy there too but tbh when am innot slepe tho gawd what is wrong with me rn o well lets keep going also do more ec cuz that stuff wouldvemade this a bit less close

4th hourL debate -  got some version of a B. welp that was just tragically hundreds of times harder than i thoguht it was gonan be welp next semester english gotta make sur ei scure this one friends

ok i need some water before i begin but for the lols probs not going to correct the disaster that is the lst two paragraphs and eakvsfbdgrhtegr[wfe

im back yo

5th Hour: Ap Econ - ended up with an A,  and managed to rush the final to study apchem and still get a B on it so overall in econ maybe read a bit more so i have more reading space but like not much a problem

6th Hour: AP Chem - This one is a toughie. Barely got a B this semester, looking to try for an A next. I need to improve my labs, as my average on those are horrid. Reading quizzes i average above a 2, but then tests tho I really need to step up, definitely need to do quiz reviews and practice tests days in advance so that i can thoroughly practice and learn how to do each individual concept.

school in general is quite the menial, yet sometimes interesting experience. My average day feels pretty solitary, even though i do get to talk to friends and when i do its awesome lol. Every morning starts with me waking up way too late, rushing to get ready, and then fast walking my way down to stats all the way from the orch hallway, barely making it there a majority of the time. stats is kinda boring and sleep time. Orchestra is a fun time, although I struggle greatly with a periodically faulty stomach that just loves to butt in on the one class I can least easily go to the restroom. goddamit. French is like secondary sleepy time but i really dont like having to sleep in french for some reason. debate is now over, but it was pretty fun i guess when it lasted and i seriously learned and grew a lot as a person. Funnily tense of an atmosphere it was, with all the differing points of view, but that’s what makes it great. Econ is chill, aldinger is hilarious and yeah whatever politically we have differences but as long as he teaches econ correctly its whatever. Spencer, caroleen, muyang, ditty, ethan make econ fun too our cluster of 6. And apchem lol vedaant michael those monkeys i love em.

fiddlers is quite fun actually. It makes me really happy and some of those songs are quite nice and while i play them i think and feel and its nice.

gotta organize february mmm sigh had to cancel this month and it was a good idea to do so way too fricking busy.

sectionals tomorrow so tiring but we need it but im hoping to sleep early today so i should be able to handle it.

sometimes I feel like a burden/annoyance to people around me and i really don’t want to be that but i feel like nobody would tell me that to my face

How am I feeling? I honestly dunno. I feel heavy, both physically and emotionally. Confused mentally, currently satisfied. There are many questions my mind and heart want answered, but my belief in trust overrides my curiosity for answers where I may end up regretting knowing.

I’m going to make an effort to be kinder and happier towards everyone I know, hopefully not coming across as fake along the way. When someone is friendly and smiling to me, it feels good, so hopefully I can do the same for others. I know some people will claim I’m already pretty nice but I don’t think so, im still randomly not at some times which makes me hate myself but thats whatever. I don’t think there’s that much of a limit to how much is enough kindness, everyone deserves as much as they can get.