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newtonsheffield · 3 years

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Heyyyy!!

I don’t know if you’d recognize me but it’s Nona from AO3

I haven’t commented on your fics in a while but trust me I love for your fics just as much right now as I was before

Your content is amazing and it gives me life so thank you so much!

I don’t know when you’ll get this cause I know you have quite the fan following these days but I really wanted to see something and of course you don’t have to write it if you don’t want to but it’ll truly make my day if you would

And again, I know you included this in the Kate grieving her father fic (I can’t remember the name sorry lol) but

I am such a sucker for comforting Anthony and my favorite part in the book is when he helps Kate through her panic attack for the first time

I was wondering if you could do something along the same lines in your Bridgerton and Sons AU but after they’ve started dating. Something like Kate having a panic attack for the first time and Anthony freaking the hell out but then helping her through it. Aww my heart!!

Oh and before I forget, I think this should tell you how much I appreciate you! I didn’t have a tumblr account and I don’t follow anyone else. I created one just to follow you and I only actually follow you! So once again, thank you so much!

Ummmmmm OF COURSE I remember you!

I may sound insane when I say this but I remember probably each and every one of you and when someone new likes one of my posts I’m like “You’re new here. I’m so sorry.” “Quite the fan following” My goodness! This made me chuckle! The thought of me having any kind of following is a little absurd to me tbh 😂 I took a birthday portrait for my cat yesterday, y’all. I’m. Yep. Just. Okay. But also, you created a tumblr just for this content??? My god, that is so incredibly flattering and I hope it lives up to your expectations!

Okay! So! in my mind, the first time Anthony saw Kate have a panic attack (Which fortunately happen quite infrequently for her now) was that time in Dormant on the Anniversary of her Father’s death. So I’m instead going to tell you about the next time she has one. And, against all of her instincts, against every part of her telling her to run away and hide, She does what Anthony says. She finds Him.

“Anthony, Honey are you sure that you-” His mother’s voice was cut off by the ringing of his phone. He glanced down at it, a little apologetically the name Kate Sheffield (Sex Goddess) flashing across the screen. “Sorry, Mum. It’s Kate. I’ll just be a second.” He said, his mother giving him an indulgent smile as he moved into the hallway, one of his own creeping onto his face as he answered.

And he immediately knew something was wrong. He could hear deep breathing on the end of the phone, gasping for air, his fiancée’s voice choking out before he could start

“Anthony, umm...” a pause and a deep breath “It’s Kate.” And his heart was in his throat his mind racing already “Kate, honey. Is everything okay? Are Mary and Edwina okay?” He said, panic creeping into his own voice a little. He could hear her breath shuddering as she struggled the words from her chest. “They’re... not here... You... Umm.. You told me to find you if this happened. and I know you’re helping your mum but Do you think-” She stuttered out and Anthony’s heart started racing. Kate was alone, having a panic attack. They’d spoken gently after the forst time it had happened, month’s ago now Mary and Edwina don’t know do they? He’d said gently and she’d shaken her head a little embarrassed Not anymore. And before she could even get the question out he was saying gently into the phone “Are you at home?” She made a soft affirmative noise and his heart stuttered at how weak it sounded “Okay, just stay on the phone, I’m coming home.” Kate’s breath shuddered.

“Mum.” Anthony said, forcing himself to remain calm as he ducked his head back into the living room “I’m gonna have to head out, Kate needs me at home.” His mother looked up, a little startled “Is everything alright?” She said gently, her brow furrowing. Anthony forced himself to roll his eyes “Newton’s gotten himself into a sticky situation. He’ll be alright.” Violet chuckled lightly and said “Say Hello to Kate for me, you really are so lucky, Anthony.” Anthony smiled at the truth of it and then he was gone. As soon as he was in the hall he was back on the phone, walking as quickly as he could, and when the front door closed behind him he was running down the street to his parked car.

“Are you still there?” He said, keeping his voice soft, calm. Much calmer than the panic clawing at his chest as he reached the car. Kate took a deep breath though he could hear a soft sob coming from her and his heart broke. “Yeah.” She said eventually as Anthony pulled into traffic. “Why don’t you get Newton? He can keep you company until I get there. I’m coming, Kate. I’m on my way.” He whispered as the phone connected with the car’s system. He heard a shuffling, and then a whining noise and ridiculously Anthony’s panic calmed just slightly at the thought of Kate’s pudgy little dog at her side. “I’ll be there in five minutes.” “I’ll be there in four minutes.” “I’ll be there in 2 minutes.” “I’m right outside Honey, where are you?” Anthony counted down, listening to her stuttered breathing whispering soothing nothing’s as he drove weaving in and out of traffic as best he could. “In the bedroom” She whispered just as he was parking the car. And then he was running, his heart thundering as he wrenched the door open, running up the stairs as fast as he could, bursting through the bedroom door, and the sight nearly stopped his heart.

Kate was huddled at the foot if their bed, her arm wrapped around her middle, tears running down her face as sobs wracked her body, her breaths coming in harsh gulps. Anthony was practically panting as he moved gently towards her, Newton huddled in her lap, his nose pressed against her neck growled slightly as Anthony settled next to her. “it’s okay, buddy. I’ve got her now.” He said gently as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. “I’m right here Kate, deep breaths...perfect.” He said gently has she gulped air into her system “I love you, so much.” He said repeating it over and over as her breathing evened out, he felt her body relax into his and finally, her tiny voice “You shouldn’t marry me.” And his heart stopped again. “I’m a mess.” Anthony forced himself to cluck his tongue “Mmm but who else could put up with me?” He said, and he felt a choked laugh fight its way free from her chest, a little noise of disbelief. “That’s probably true. I guess I’ll have to do it.”

Anthony hummed again “Thank God.” they sat in silence for several seconds, Newton shifting to settle his head on Anthony’s lap. “I really am sorry you know.” Kate said “I don’t know what happened, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” and she couldn’t look him in the eyes, they were fixed on her hand, on the engagement ring there, her eyes burning into it. Anthony cupped her cheek forcing her to look in his eyes, to feel what he was saying “There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. And that is my completely unbiased opinion as your future husband.” She let out an odd, huffing laugh again, her eyes lighting up for just a moment “We all need help or support sometimes, Kate. And I can’t wait to support you for the rest of my life.” He finished, brushing his lips lightly against hers, his heart clenching as she sighed against them “Careful, Mr Bridgerton, sounds like you’re calling me a gold-digger.” She said when she pulled back, a tiny smirk forming on her lips. Anthony forced his face into a surprised expression “Aren’t you?! God, that is good news!” The sound of her laughter rang out through the room, and it was the best music he’d ever heard.

#bridgerton and sons au #kathony #anthony x kate #anthony bridgerton #kate sheffield #dormant a bridgerton and sons fic #kathony angst #molly's asks and answers

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sofwrites · 3 years

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for the prompt thing; polin + 41

41: sitting close and knees touching | Also my entry for Polin Week Day 3: Modern AU

A modern twist on Penelope finding out about Colin's journals

Themes: angst, yearning, teasing | Length: 2.3k

Read on ao3 or under the cut | masterlist

Thank you for requesting! xx

He hadn’t planned on telling anyone. He really hadn’t planned on anyone seeing them. And he really really hadn’t planned on anyone ever reading them.

The only reason Colin had even started keeping a journal was to remind himself that he was a real person on his travels- that he had the power to leave something permanent on earth. That he wasn’t completely wasting his time flitting from country to country- desperately trying to find some sort of purpose in his life.

Again, he hadn’t planned on anyone seeing them.

But one day he was painstakingly hiding his journals in a deep, hidden corner of his laptop, and the next, Penelope Featherington had found one. She’d found one then read. And somehow, she thought they were good. Actually good. Not I’m-only-saying-this-to-be-nice good.

And, sure, it had all happened by accident, but after some time, Colin was so incredibly thankful that it did.

He’d been hiding out in Eloise’s flat (Anthony had texted about wanting to meet that afternoon because- well, it didn’t matter really. The fact of the matter was that Colin had no desire to do so) when the buzzer rang.

He ignored it and continued to flip through the book in his hand.

But then it rang again. And again.

And on the fourth ring, Colin finally groaned and forced himself off of the sofa.

It was barely a second after his finger had reached the speaker that a loud, rather familiar-sounding shriek rang out. “Eloise!! Eloise! Please tell me you’re there!”

With a snort, Colin cut the voice off and buzzed them in. And in roughly a minute (an impressive feat considering that Eloise lived on the fifth floor), he saw a bouncing bit of red hair through the peephole and opened the door.

“Thank God, I really need-” Penelope froze mid-step in the frame as her eyes traveled up to reach Colin’s face. For a moment, she just stared, her mouth parted open. And then she swallowed and gave a quick shake of the head.

With a slightly forced smile, she nodded and swept past him, looking around as she went towards the sitting room. “Is Eloise in?”

“She’s not,” Colin answered flatly as he casually leaned against the closed door. He kept an impressively blank expression as Penelope haphazardly rifled through Eloise’s desk, roughly blowing a few loose curls out of her face. “Looking for something?”

Penelope either missed or simply ignored the teasing tone as she frantically moved her search to the sofa cushions. “Did she leave her laptop here?”

“Don’t think so. Though I’m not entirely sure- all she told me was to try not to empty her entire fridge.”

Normally, that would have elicited Colin a laugh or an amused smile, but all Penelope did was let out a groan. A groan that bizarrely caused his stomach to flip. He glanced away from her, clearing his throat. ”Erm- but if you need a laptop, I do have mine.”

Penelope looked up at him with such sharpness that it caught him a bit off guard. “You do? Can I borrow it?”

He blinked at her for a moment, but quickly nodded and motioned to his bag near her feet. He’d barely muttered a “Course” before she’d already retrieved and set it on the table.

“Oh, password’s-” Colin balked for a second, his mouth still open. He’d never told anyone his password before, and it felt… Odd. Unnerving to give away such a private piece of information. But Penelope was looking up at him again, eyes huge and slightly feral, antsy fingers hovering over the keys. He rubbed the back of his neck before mumbling, “GregorySux. With an x.”

The tips of Penelope’s fingers froze as the corner of her mouth twitched, but she bit her lip as she looked down to type.

“He kept hacking into it,” Colin said in an attempt to justify himself.

She seemed so focused on the screen that he thought she hadn’t heard him, but, almost absentmindedly, Penelope said, “Don’t think it’s hacking if your password is literally Password.”

He gaped at her. “I can’t believe Eloise told you!”

This time, Penelope just shrugged in response, her attention completely taken away. The only sounds that filled the room were those of her lightning-quick typing.

He stood there for a moment, feeling uncharacteristically awkward as he watched her fingers work. And then he cracked his neck before nodding. “Right, I’ll give you a minute…”

And as he reached Eloise’s toilet, it occurred to Colin he’d never before been alone with Penelope- not really. He’d known the girl for over a decade, but they’d never really been friends. They were friendly and had spent a decent amount of time together, but there’d never been a real closeness, definitely not one where they could spend a casual afternoon hanging out.

But Colin had never had trouble with finding the right words to say, so it shouldn’t be different with Penelope, right?

He’d asked her about work- that was safe. And maybe how her recent trip with Eloise and Frannie had been- also another safe topic. After that, it’d be no trouble.

But when he reentered the hallway, Colin immediately noticed how quiet it had suddenly gotten- the air completely absent of any hasty typing. Silently, he peered inside the sitting room.

Penelope was still hunched over his laptop, her mouth parted slightly as she stared at the screen. The only movement of her hands was to scroll, but her eyes were running across the screen at an inhuman speed. He watched her for a moment, the corner of his mouth rising unconsciously as her lips mouthed a few words.

He felt intrigued.

Not intrigued by her- of course. But rather intrigued by what had entranced her so much that she couldn’t dare peel her eyes from the computer.

She didn’t react as he crept behind her, looking over her shoulder to see the screen. The brightness was a bit lowered, but he could see a Word document. He leaned a bit closer, eyes squinting as he read a random line.

Imagine you’re at a party, feeling weightless and invincible-

Wait- he recognized those words.

Colin’s eyes flew to the title of the page, which very clearly read, Italy, 09/03/19.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Penelope yelped at the sudden noise, turning her head so quickly that her forehead made contact with Colin’s nose.

“OW!”

And that was how it had all started. A frantic Penelope, a trip to the toilet, an accidentally minimized Word document, and a (luckily) not broken nose.

He’d been angry at first… Well, really, he’d been fairly livid about the entire thing. Not because he was necessarily mad at Penelope, who had accidentally opened the tab initially, but rather because he felt… Embarrassed. It was embarrassing having one’s little sister’s best friend accidentally come across their greatest secret.

But even though he wanted to forget and pretend it all had never happened, Penelope had been unrelenting. After an assurance that what she read had been good, she’d practically demanded that he let her read through the rest of his work.

And now, weeks later, here they were sitting next to each other at his kitchen table, two cups of tea and a printed-out version of his journal laid out in front of them.

“What was it you were trying to say here?” Penelope asked, her eyes rolling over a highlighted section of an Australia entry.

He looked down at the page, following where her finger rested. Instantly, he felt himself flush a bit. She was pointing out a particularly convoluted metaphor he’d written, one likening the magnificent sunset to the familiarity of reading one’s favorite childhood book for the first time as an adult.

“Erm…” He cringed, unable to say anything else.

It was still so odd- the not knowing what to say. Colin Bridgerton wasn’t someone who ever had trouble figuring out his words, and yet… And yet having Penelope had that effect on him. Or, more likely, having Penelope inspect his work, dissecting every word that had ever come out of his brain, make him feel insecure in a way he never was.

It wasn’t so much that it was Penelope, of course. She was his sister’s best friend, a woman he’d known since they were barely grown. It would have been like that if anyone else had seen his work, he was sure of it.

But even still- he found himself staring at a rogue curl on her cheek, his hand twitching to reach up and tuck it away.

“Colin?” Penelope interrupted his roaming thoughts, abruptly looking up at him. Her lips pinched together once she saw his expression, pulling themselves down into a small frown. “Colin,” she repeated in a softer voice. “I wasn’t lying when I said you were a fantastic writer. It’s just that everyone needs a little editing- even the best of us.”

His head tilted slightly as he looked at her, suddenly caught on her use of the word, us. “Do you write a lot then?”

Penelope’s lips slowly formed a smile as she looked at him, a hint of hesitation on her face. She sighed, taking a moment. “Well, actually-” But then she cut herself off, suddenly resembling the same shy Penelope he hadn’t seen in years.

Colin found himself leaning in, putting both arms on the table in front of them, desperate to hear the end of whatever she’d wanted to say. He could feel his knee bumping into hers, but neither of them moved. “What?” he prompted, surprised to hear how faint his voice was. There was something about the moment that was making it rather difficult to breathe.

Penelope was looking back at him with an intensity, mouth slightly parted as she licked her lips reflexively. There was nothing inherently seductive about the movement, but- But something about the way her tongue flicked out made Colin’s stomach clench uncomfortably.

“Uhm,” she whispered, only hearing the loud beating of her heart. No one knew about her secret, other than her editor. And it would surely be a disaster if anyone ever found out …

But she had found out about Colin’s secret, albeit by accident. It felt only right that he should know hers as well…

But if she were being truly honest, she didn’t care very much about her secret at that present moment. Not when the two green eyes she had spent her entire adolescence (and much of her early adulthood) pining over were staring directly at her, looking as though they could see through her entire soul.

Every breath was an effort, every movement was the most difficult task in history. The spot where their knees were still gently pressed against each other felt like it was on fire, spreading itself across her body. She’d been in so much shock when the contact had happened that she hadn’t moved away. And then she’d been astonished when he hadn’t either.

Penelope couldn’t even remember what they’d been talking about, and it almost appeared that Colin… That Colin shared the same sentiment.

It felt like she was dreaming. Somehow, he was staring at her with just as much intensity as she was to him. She wasn’t sure if anyone had… She was quite certain that no one had ever looked at her like that.

Colin swallowed as he stared at her, taking in every freckle spread across her nose and every loose curl surrounding her face. He could see her eyes clearly for perhaps the first time in his life- a beautiful shade of warm brown with golden flecks throughout the iris. And then his eyes unwillingly moved, flickering to her lips as she licked them again, causing his gut to wrench painfully.

And then he realized that his hands on the table were so close to her own, the one still resting on his forgotten journal excerpt.

Almost without meaning to, his pinky twitched, moving just enough to meet hers. His breath hitched as he looked back up to meet her gaze.

Neither of them moved, as if moving would break something fragile. As if moving would forcibly tear them from the moment they were.

But then- he wasn’t sure how long- Penelope’s soft eyes left his, darting down to rest on their touching fingers. And then her eyes widened, and her entire body jerked backward, and suddenly Colin’s knee was incredibly cold.

Her chair made a loud scraping noise against the floor as she jumped up, startling him out of the hold he’d been under. “Pen-?”

“It’s getting a bit late,” Penelope muttered through a quick breath, quickly stashing away her belongings. “I’ll finish this at home, and we can meet another time to discuss it. Maybe coffee- next week.”

Colin frowned, getting out of his seat, and taking a few steps towards her. Quietly, he said, “Or you could stay here?”

Penelope froze for a moment before slowly retrieving her keys, gaze firmly locked onto the ground. All he could see were her eyelashes as she blinked.

He bent down slightly and reached out to lift her chin. “Or you could stay here,” he repeated with a bit more reverence in his voice. “We could get some dinner and- talk.”

Penelope swallowed as her eyes rested on his face for a fraction of a moment, but soon enough, she pulled away again. Her fingers trembled as she draped the bag over her shoulder, shaking her head as she looked towards the door. “Erm, no, sorry. I really- really need to go, Colin.”

And then she all but sprinted from the flat, leaving a speechless Colin Bridgerton behind.

#polinweek #polinweek2021 #polin #bridgerton fic #my fic #this is my first posted modern polin #I have another one coming at the end of this crazy week #hope you like this though!#also I'm sorry this took weeks I hope that's okay #polinanon #ugh can you tell polin week is killing me #because it is

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stormbornbastard · 3 years

Text

The Potential In Philoise

gif credit: @vakariaan

tw/ sexual assault, abuse, depression, suicide, julia quinn’s writing

AN: Okay, so I said awhile ago I would explain why Phillip and Eloise are my favorite couple in the series so get ready...it’s a bit of a long one.

I read four Bridgerton books immediately after the show ended. Skipping over The Duke and I because I wasn’t comfortable with the assault scene between Simon and Daphne and also because I had already seen the romance play out onscreen. I fell in love with each romance I encountered, mainly because I didn’t read them as they were but as the show would make them out to be. I romanticized a romance series as weird as that sounds. Yet, none of the romances struck me the way To Sir Phillip, With Love did.

It’s not a perfect book. In fact, it's incredibly problematic. Phillip rapes his depressed wife, Marina (although given Julia’s history with crossing the lines of consent I doubt this is the way she wanted us to interpret the scene. Actually, the way it was written made it seem like we were meant to sympathize with Phillip and his loveless marriage. Hence the way he immediately grows ill afterward.) Marina attempts suicide and dies due to disease later on. Given her storyline in the show and the fact that a young biracial woman is playing her was disheartening, to say the least.

(AN: I don’t consider the character to be Black representation, she’s biracial. As a black woman who enjoyed her character and arc, no part of me felt seen and represented through her because she was half black. She's Biracial rep, not Black rep and that’s okay. Just putting that out there. )

Phillip seeks a woman to take care of his children, fuck and do the shit he doesn’t want to do. His mental illness is handled in such a shitty way. The independent nature Eloise once has is almost stifled by Phillip and what he wants for some reason. He’s neglectful, erratic and he does dismiss potential negative feelings Eloise could have in their relationship because of his past relationship.

It's fucked up. The entire book.

And yet, imagining how this problematic romance would play out on screen once properly adapted for modern audiences makes me fucking giddy. All because of one, simple thing that remains the reason I am so fucking excited to see this pairing onscreen.

The unrealized potential the pairing and Phillip as a character have in the novel.

Let me explain.

Their romance is unique. Phillip and Eloise are not strangers when they meet. They’ve been writing to each other for months, picking each other’s brains every week or so. Getting to know each other in a way that other couples in the series don’t at first. Intellectually. They’re able to keep such a steady, enthralling dialogue through letters, and it's a friendship that they both enjoy. Phillip stimulates Eloise’s mind, something the show has emphasized her wanting, for months. He’s her intellectual equal, or at least...he has the potential to be. Of course, he slaves over the letters (which is cute as fuck because he really just wants her to like him) but it's still his words. It’s his voice. It is Phillip, at his best.

I hope the show can play this up. Phillip is a botanist and a scholar before he inherits his family’s estate. Eloise has a desire to learn and further her knowledge of the world around her. Bonding over their shared love of education, fun banter based around teasing the other and their individual studies, taking an interest in what the other desires to learn. Reading books together in the greenhouse, etc. The show could easily play up the fact that Phillip was not only a gardener but a literal man of science, something Julia neglects in their book despite it having the possibility of playing a major factor in their love story.

The possibilities of it just...makes me swoon.

Moving on, Eloise choosing to pursue a possible future with this man is a big fucking deal. Running away from home to go after a future for herself IS her displaying her OWN agency. Sure, Phillip poses the question of it but she’s the one who chooses it. Phillip doesn’t demand her to come to him, he simply suggests it and she’s the one who acts. The one who pursues. And if they hadn’t been bombarded by her brothers, it would’ve remained her choice of whether or she wanted to be a part of this man’s life permanently.

Phillip wouldn’t have forced her, he could’ve easily tried to. By going to the Bridgerton house and discussing with Anthony the possibility of marrying her but no, he asks her. HE ASKS HER AND SHE CHOOSES. I fucking love that. It's like the bare minimum but given the time period and the number of couples where the man has the final say on the marriage, this just makes me giddy. The show could change this and give Eloise more time with Phillip to the point where she chooses him and isn’t forced into the marriage which I hope they do.

Also, their first meeting where neither one of them is what the other expects sounds amazing ngl. The initial confusion, shock, unease, and undeniable attraction, it's gonna serve why lie?

Despite how much it affects him, the subject of Phillip’s abuse is handled so...wrong. As someone who shares an experience with abusive parents, I understand the fear of becoming like them. Of hurting the ones you love and being angry and feeling guilty. Yet, Phillip never confronts these fears. Not really. Sure, we get the scene in the nursery but thinking of how the show could handle it and his relationship with his children makes me excited. Having him being neglectful of his children was the wrong move, especially if his fear is hurting them in an attempt to discipline them. It's clear he loves them and ultimately wants the best for them which is why he’s searching for someone to better take care of them despite the shitty bitch he already has hired. I hope the show capitalizes on that.

Have Phillip be involved but not a disciplinary figure. Yeah, I get that he’s the man or whatever but it's clear that Phillip finds no enjoyment in the act or even pondering it. But he does love his kids. Have him be overwhelmed but still involved. It just felt weird that Phillip didn’t want anything to do with his kids despite one of his main reasons to look for a wife was so that they could be properly taken care of. Have him try but struggle. A lot.

It’d be funny to see Oliver and Amanda running the house and Phillip struggling to keep up. They’re supposed to be mischievous, they should play that up in the show. Having the kids be little gremlins but instead of him ignoring them completely, he could just give in to their whims. And when his anger does get the best of him, then he could run. Be distant, wrestle with his internal struggle with abuse but also knowing he can’t let his kids run his household like this and go about as reckless as they do.

Speaking of abuse, I hope they scrap the nursery lady altogether. I know it’s supposed to show him stepping into dad mode but it just felt like unnecessary and triggering of his own child abuse. He could easily step into this role by learning to deal with his anger, learning to control it. Eloise could suggest journaling the way she does (another bonding moment that could be less cute and more intimate if done right.) Having him put his anger into gardening, I interpreted it as it being a safe place and coping mechanism for him in the book and that would be nice to see.

Having to finally put an end to his kids' tirade once he learns to trust himself and realize that he’s nothing like his father. Actual healing from childhood trauma and Eloise helping him do so. She could also suggest boxing with her brothers like...it just makes sense. As someone with a temper, boxing helped me sort through that and the opportunity to see Phillip and Simon bonding, while boxing, over their shitty dads, sounds pretty fucking cathartic (and hot).

I would just like the show to truly show that just because you’ve dealt with abuse doesn’t mean you have to be defined and like your abuser. Phillip is a pretty great candidate for it because the guy is...scarred, to say the least.

I love the physical side of Phillip and Eloise’s relationship. Like really love, it's said that they try different things and are comfortable in that regard with each other and it just...yeah, that makes me happy. Besides that, I hope they play up the intellectual side of their relationship. Two nerds in love are adorable and imagining Phillip ranting about plants and Eloise just being completely enthralled at this man and his passion sounds like the cutest fucking shit.

Speaking of intellectual, it's implied Phillip cares little about high society. Meaning, wouldn’t he care even less about societal expectations and norms? Meaning Eloise would literally find freedom with this man to just...do her. Despite the book showing how Phillip wants a wife, it never really says that he cares exactly how that wife maintains herself or their household. Eloise wants to fuck around and wear trousers? He doesn’t care. Eloise wants a private tutor and a study for herself? Cool. Eloise wants to take Amanda riding in the forest and then teach her how to shoot? All good. The man was literally proud to watch her beat her brothers in a traditionally masculine sport. He wants his wife to run his house and his entire life how she sees fit.

Julia really neglected how much agency and power that could give Eloise. She could be his equal, like really be his equal. Of course, Phillip becoming more involved in his and his children’s lives is a part of his arc but nothing leads me to believe he would want to control Eloise. The two of them being more than just lovers, but partners who allow the other their freedoms when needed sounds epic as shit.

Now some things that could easily be left out, the rape scene. It’s there to showcase that Phillip has lost his wife and there is no chance of reigniting whatever they may have had in the past. Yet, there are so many other ways to show that. Phillip could try and speak with her with no response. Hold her hand and she pulls away? He’s a smart man, it doesn’t take much to get the hint so that could’ve easily been written out and replaced with something else.

Second of all, I like the possibility of Marina and Phillip finding happiness at first. Of them trying to love each other after George and succeeding. The way Marina is written in the show, I doubt she’s quick to give up. So to see the two of them having an agreeable marriage and getting along would be nice. They could showcase her mental illness in a different form, it's clear she suffers from postpartum depression. She withdraws into herself, distances herself from her children. She’s depressed but it's not as stereotypical and easily spotted as Julia makes it out to be. Marina just gives up on her children and life without any fight? Absolutely not.

As someone who suffers from depression, the way Julia wrote it is so...??? The truth is, I would like Phillip and their family to not even realize she’s suicidal. To not see it coming when she jumps in the lake and attempts to end her own life because that's exactly how suicide impacts so many people and their loved ones. They don’t see it coming. Phillip struggling with the guilt of that rather than the anger of being trapped in a loveless marriage sounds...a lot more interesting to me. Me, personally. Considering how much buzz the show has, it would spark up a dialogue and a good one if handled properly. I’ve thought a lot about Marina but this is just how I would prefer to see it handled if they go through with her canon death (which I am not actively rooting for by the way.)

Another reason I like the potential of Philloise is Oliver and Amanda, they just add some extra spice. If fully realized characters, watching them grow closer to their dad and form a relationship with Eloise would be so rewarding for two kids who have lost a lot. Also, the amount of comedic gold in their pranks with Eloise and dynamic with each other would give the season even more humor on top of Eloise herself.

And as much as I love the line, “this-us-is heaven.” They could easily modify the love speech. Like very easily.

My point is, I think their potential outweighs the problematic factors in their story and I doubt the show will fail on realizing it and ridding itself of the problematic aspects. One could even say they already started, I mean look at the way the show made a point to show Eloise’s disgust with fathers and husbands who abandon their family, and then comes Phillip, doing the absolute most to protect his remaining family. I mean, Bridgerton did turn the weakest romance in the series into a whole pop culture phenomenon. My hopes are high. Okay, that’s all.

#this is long as hell #my bad #eloise x phillip #phillip crane #eloise bridgerton #philoise #philloise #my babies #i love them #i cant wait for their season #to sir phillip with love

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annebrontesrequiem · 3 years

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Femininity and Bridgerton

So 27 days ago a lovely anon said that they’d be glad to hear my thoughts on femininity and Bridgerton, and since I’m now finally free from school I decided to stop playing Genshin Impact and binging Disney movies and actually do something.

This is going to probably be very long (spoilers it’s 1,800 words long), so more under the cut.

So, a few things. Firstly I am specifically talking about Bridgerton, as the way that femininity is portrayed in media is a very complex and arduous topic. Secondly this is obviously just my opinion and you can absolutely disagree, even tell me if you do I love listening to different perspectives. Thirdly I’m talking about a show that is very heteronormative (the painter and Benedict aside as I’m focusing mostly on Daphne in this post), and presents a very specific part of straight, cis, upper class femininity. So keep that in mind as well. Also as I’m going to be talking about patriarchy, femininity, and masculinity I know that there might be a few TERFs that crawl out of the woodwork and just… don’t. This isn’t for you and while I’m at it please go read some actual feminist texts. Also I know that this is a period piece but I will be addressing that don’t worry.

Also I am going to be talking about that one scene so trigger warning I’m going to be talking about sexual assault.

Also full Bridgerton season one spoilers.

----

So, all that set up out of the way, let’s talk about femininity in the Bridgerton series.

A good deal of Bridgerton focuses on the ways in which women are often confined by their role as women in society, as well as how they subvert that role for their own gains. This is used well in some cases, such as when the Viscountess uses the network that is forged between servants and women of the upper class to subvert Daphne’s marriage to Nigel Berbrooke. Being a period piece with a (mostly) diverse cast it also allows for women of color, specifically black women, to be portrayed in a very feminine light, where in society at large they are usually not allowed to inhabit such a space. However in attempting to subvert the status that women often occupied in Regency England the show accidentally reinforces views of femininity and its value.

Let’s talk about Eloise and Daphne. Eloise is very outspoken about the difficulties that comes with being a woman in society, wishing to break out of the confines of femininity. Daphne, on the other hand, wishes to stay within the traditional woman’s sphere, get married, have children, run a household. And while in text these two women often debate the meaning of their position as women, each making very valid points about their status and how they’re confined by it, the framing makes it seem that Eloise’s position is ultimately the “better” one.

Full disclosure, Eloise is my favorite Bridgerton character. I love her outspokenness, her determination to make something out of her life, the fact that she attempts to make the oppression of the society around her explicit. However I think the way she is framed as this, for lack of a better term, “girlboss” in the making is often reductive. The show seems to have this idea that Daphne is in some ways inferior in goal to Eloise. That is, Eloise’s value isn’t that she is an ambitious person whose status as a woman hampers said ambition, but rather that she is in some ways morally and intellectually superior to Daphne by rejecting her femininity and repressing qualities that are considered less masculine and thus lesser.s It presents this idea of women’s empowerment wherein one is only empowered if they deliberately step out of traditional femininity, either in appearance or in life path, rather than confronting a society that sees femininity as inferior. Daphne’s wish to continue in the traditional sphere of womanhood is somehow lesser, and she only becomes truly empowered later in the series when she becomes more aggressive (we’ll talk about that later).

That Eloise has her own book where she presumably falls in love and gets married makes this all the more confusing. Does she then lose her intellect and her status as an empowering woman? The messages feel very mixed. In portraying Eloise as enlightened for actively resisting the woman’s sphere and Daphne as needing to learn to be more “assertive” to gain said enlightenment, the show accidentally presents femininity as inherently passive, inferior to the assertion that is more traditionally masculine. This is something that modern period dramas often fall into. Empowered women are only empowered by attempting to transcend their femininity, to become more masculine. The bottom line isn’t to present women and femininity as equal in all ways to men and masculinity, but femininity is something reductive that must be shed to truly become equal.

Since we’re talking about Daphne I want to examine her character arc within this lens as well. Daphne is adamant that she wants a love-match. She is also very aware of the importance of presentation, as well as the importance of reputation. This is a very solid foundation, as is a way where Bridgerton taps into the complexity of the role of women in regency society in a good way. However as the show goes on this complexity seems to fade in favor of making Daphne, again I’m sorry, a “girlboss”. This is made explicit in the scene in which Daphne violates Simon’s consent, as well as the way in which this act is framed.

Now you can tell immediately from the framing of the scene in which Daphne violates Simon’s consent what this is supposed to be interpretated as. From the music to the triumphant looks on Daphne’s face, this is supposed to be a moment in which Daphne has finally gained control of her life. And yet in doing this, and in presenting this whole scene as a result of Simon’s “betrayal” – and thus something his has to take the blame for – the show is making a value judgement. Daphne can only become strong by becoming “assertive” (ie aggressive) to the point of violating someone’s consent.

The topic of rape culture is a very long and arduous one which I will not be diving into, but I do wish to point to the fact that men are supposed to be aggressive, both sexually and otherwise. Men are the ones who always “want it”, who are uncontrollable, and who are willing to be aggressive to get what they want. This toxic idea of sex and masculinity is what I felt Daphne dipped into during this scene, and instead of presenting it as horrifying or a betrayal on Daphne part, it is presented as the climax of her character arc. I believe a showrunner once said that it was imperative to the “education” of Daphne Bridgerton. Thus is Daphne’s strength no longer her determination to be happy within the sphere she has been placed in by patriarchy, but her willingness to take back her life, no matter the cost. And yes this could’ve been a message about how men are also assaulted, but that is not at all what the showrunners wanted you to get out of this scene.

Lastly I want to touch on the men in the Bridgerton universe, because the devaluation of femininity also affects men no less than it does women. All the men in the Bridgerton universe are either bad people or rakes. Name me one (1) man in the Bridgerton universe who is presented as feminine, either in appearance or personality. And no femininity is not the same as being gay, the painter is not feminine. To be a man worthy of screen time or romance in the Bridgerton universe one must be as traditionally masculine as possible, and ready to make that your defining character trait.

Now I know that this is a large romance novel issue, as someone who has read three of the Outlander books I am unfortunately aware of how romance novels fall into this derivative state. But just because something is common that doesn’t mean it is any less worthy of criticism. The argument that it’s simply being “period accurate” is also something I don’t accept. Yes the regency era was incredibly patriarchal, but that does not mean that the women within it were helpless and could only break out of that helplessness by rejecting their own femininity. Jane Austen is a classic example, but I will also point to women such as Elizabeth Gaskell, the Bronte Sisters, and George Eliot in terms of English women who were highly intelligent and worthy of acclaim despite still associating themselves with their status as women in society. For a broader historical view I’d also like to present Catherine the Great and Empress Josephine who, despite being viewed in an often very derivative manner by the men around them, rose to great prominence and power.

In the end this is a larger societal issue and not one that my post will magically fix. But I will say this: we need to stop telling women and girls that the only way to get rid of patriarchy is to reject femininity. In doing so we say that masculinity is indeed the better trait, that by repressing one’s emotions and one’s femininity one can attain equality. We also need to stop telling men that the only way to ensure their own value to be aggressive, to tap into that toxic masculinity which we spoon feed them from birth. This hurts everyone, men, women, non-binary people. It makes the world a worse place and only when we stop trying to wiggle our way out of femininity and actually acknowledge its status as equal to masculinity will we achieve this.

I believe Bridgerton wanted to do that, wanted to present the complexities and anxieties of women living in a patriarchal world and the way in which they can subvert that world to their advantage. However it falls into the same trap it seems to be attempting to get out of, and at the end of the day one is left with a sense of vapidness. Though I may like Bridgerton (so much so that I binge watched the series twice and am even considering reading the books) I think that we need to acknowledge its flaws, because only then will we be able to move forward and make media that is more enjoyable, more nuanced, and ultimately better in terms of expectations and norms.

Like I said this is a very complicated topic, but I hope I got my point across well. Thank you if you read all the way through this and I hope you have a lovely day!

#bridgerton #wow this is fucking long #I hope I explained the eloise part well it's hard to verbalize #but yeah we need to talk about pop culture's view on feminism and women's empowerment #mine

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felicia-cat-hardy · 3 years

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These 2 Best Friends Met On Twitter During The Pandemic

Friends may come and go, but best friends are forever. In Elite Daily's Bestie Check series, we're celebrating the stories that make best friendship so special. Whether they grew up together or recently met through an app, this series explores the unique ways BFFs first bonded and how they maintain their strong friendships to this day. Did they hit it off instantly? What was their biggest fight about? Who's better at keeping secrets? If you thought passing the vibe check was hard, only the very best can pass the bestie check.

When Beatriz "Bea" Atienza tweeted about her love of a particular romantic pairing — Malex, for fans of the show — from The CW's series Roswell, New Mexico in April 2020, she had no idea she'd meet her future BFF on Twitter as a result. Yet that's exactly what happened after Alba B. J. responded to Bea's tweet "desperate to find someone" to talk to about the same on-screen couple — even if it meant talking to a stranger.

The self-identifying feminists — who live half a country apart, in two different regions of Spain — were both in lockdown amid the coronavirus pandemic when they first slid into each other's DMs. While distance could potentially hurt a lot of friendships, it's all Bea and Alba have ever known throughout the course of their year-long relationship — and they love it. They even became pen pals in recent weeks, hand-writing letters to each other whenever they get a chance. In Bea's own words about their letter exchange: "If we weren’t in the Bridgerton mood enough, we are now."

All it took was one tweet about a TV show ship to kickstart their fangirl friendship. Their shared love of books, graphic novels, and other series is how they continued to bond. Though they've yet to meet in real life (which they hope to be able to do this summer), how they view everything outside of fandoms — like love, politics, and family — is why they consider each other besties.

Here's their story:

Alba B. J.

About Me: Intense fangirl, food and music lover, devoted feminist, and human rights defender.

Age: 20

Current Location: I was born, raised, and currently live in Spain — 30 minutes outside Barcelona.

Zodiac Sign: Gemini

Beatriz "Bea" Atienza

About Me: Aspiring teacher, chocolate lover, and your local feminist fangirl.

Age: 20

Current Location: I live in a town called Aranjuez — about 45 minutes away from Madrid, Spain.

Zodiac Sign: Hardcore Libra

How did you two meet?

Bea Atienza: I had posted a tweet in Spanish regarding my favorite ship from The CW's Roswell, New Mexico, Malex — aka Michael and Alex, played by Michael Vlamis and Tyler Blackburn, respectively — and Alba replied because, like me, she had never met anyone in the fandom who spoke Spanish before.

Alba B. J.: I was desperate to find someone to talk to about Roswell, New Mexico, and that's how I (thankfully) found Bea. We started talking about the show and other fandoms, and the rest is history.

What was your first impression of each other?

ABJ: That she was another version of me I needed to meet. Where has she been all this time? What an amazing girl!

BA: I thought she was very outgoing and super nice for replying without even knowing me. I hadn’t been a part of fandom Twitter that long and I didn’t realize how people who had never met could connect just like that. It was a nice surprise to see her reply and how nice and passionate about being a fan she was, because it reminded me of myself.

How long have you known each other?

ABJ: Over a year now. April 27, 2021 marked one year since we started talking.

How long have you considered yourselves best friends?

BA: I don’t think there’s a specific moment where we said, “Oh, we’re very close now.” It just kind of flowed.

ABJ: I really can’t say when exactly, but we bonded more over the last few months. Thanks for that, Bridgerton!

What initially sparked your friendship?

BA: I think it was the fact that we were both equally passionate about being fans. There are people who can watch a show or a movie or read a book and not become hardcore invested in it, but we do — it’s an important part of our lives. Bonding over pop culture pieces that you love can join two people as much as any other element or hobby. I didn’t have anyone around who lived the fandom life like that and who I had as many fandoms in common with, so finding Alba was special.

ABJ: Nothing brings two fangirls together like fangirling over the same things.

Do you know if you're astrologically compatible? Do you care?

BA: We’ve never really checked. I love to see Libra-related memes and stuff like that, but I’m not really into serious astrology.

ABJ: I really don’t know, but honestly, I don’t care. I know that we are compatible no matter what our astrology signs suggest.

What did you study in school?

ABJ: I studied cinematic production at school, and I am waiting to finalize it with an internship. While waiting to do so, I am working in a factory where my dad works.

BA: I’m almost finished with my third year in college. I’m studying to be a preschool and primary school teacher.

Have you ever lived together?

ABJ: Unfortunately, we haven’t met in person — but I think living with Bea would be marvelous since we’re so alike. I feel we would be on the same page about how the housekeeping would work and everything. I’d love to be roommates for some time with her, honestly.

How often do you text/call/FaceTime each other?

ABJ: We talk practically every day and we try to FaceTime, but sometimes it’s difficult to combine agendas. But we’re messaging, sending each other memes and fandom-related stuff all the time.

BA: We text and send audios to each other daily. FaceTiming is harder because we’re both quite busy during the week, and during the weekends either she’s out or I’m out. We’ve seen some movies together, though.

What was the last thing you texted about?

BA: My dilemma regarding my WhatsApp background. I currently have this beautiful shot of Jonathan Bailey (Anthony in Bridgerton) with a bunch of flowers, but I found a really cute pic of Shadow and Bone's Kaz and Inej that I also love, and I know Alba's the one who can help me.

ABJ: About Kate and Anthony, the main couple of the second season of Bridgerton, and the book I'm currently reading: Here the Whole Time by Vitor Martins.

What’s one TV show you both agree on?

BA: I can’t really choose one, because we generally think the same: Teen Wolf, Roswell, New Mexico, Bridgerton, and Shadow and Bone.

What's your favorite underrated thing about each other?

BA: Her style! I’ve seen many pictures of her outfits and I love her fashion — it’s casual, but cute and modern, and I envy that in a good way.

ABJ: The way we understand each other perfectly. Even from the beginning of our friendship, we have always understood each other, no matter the subject, the situation, or the "problem."

What is your favorite memory together?

BA: Either the time we watched Pride and Prejudice (2005) together — because Alba had never seen it and I’m a super fan — or when I sent her a Red, White & Royal Blue book pin and we started our letter exchange. (We’re pen pals, too!)

ABJ: It’s not one, per se — it’s the way I can always count on Bea. No matter the issue, fan stuff, important stuff, happy/sad stuff, she’s always there for me.

What’s one random memory you have of each other?

BA: It’s not really a memory we had together, but it has always stuck with me that Alba told me that when she watched Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, she started crying in the first five minutes and didn’t stop until the end of the movie.

ABJ: Maybe the way our friendship started, because I would have never thought that sending Bea that DM would have created this one-of-a-kind bond.

Which one of you is better at keeping secrets?

ABJ: I’d have to say it's a tie, because we’re both really good at keeping secrets.

BA: I’d say we’re both quite good at it. I’d never betray anyone’s trust, and I know she wouldn’t, either.

What was your biggest fight about?

BA: We've never really had a fight, hehe.

ABJ: We have never fought. Yay, friendship!

Was there ever a time when you considered not being friends?

BA: Nope.

ABJ: Honestly, no — more like the opposite. I want to be more friends, if that makes any sense. She’s such an amazing person, and we connect and understand each other so well, I still feel we could be closer.

What’s one word you’d use to describe your friendship?

BA: Serendipitous — finding something that makes you happy by chance.

ABJ: I’d go with fascinating. Every day with Bea is so beautiful and exciting.

Why do you think your friendship works?

BA: I don’t think we have a relationship like one you can have with someone you’re with every day, so of course the deeper bonds of physical contact have not arisen yet, but I think we work because we’re so similar in many aspects of life. It’s not just that we like the same TV shows, but also that we see love, family relationships, politics, etc. in very similar ways as well. We deal with certain situations in the same way and that makes me feel connected to her.

ABJ: We really understand each other and we are always there. We’re almost the same person. We feel and like things the same way. The same way we are there to fangirl over everything, we're there when more serious and mature events happen, too.

What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned from each other?

ABJ: That it's always OK to be yourself. No matter how intense or "too much" you are, there will always be someone who will understand you and share that intensity with you.

BA: I don’t think I would’ve let myself get immersed in fandom Twitter and met some other incredible people if it wasn’t for Alba. Getting to connect with other people who love what I love is a huge part of my life — if I hadn’t met her, I may have never found the community I have found.

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hoynovoy · 3 years

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These 2 Best Friends Met On Twitter During The Pandemic

Here's their story:

Alba B. J.

About Me: Intense fangirl, food and music lover, devoted feminist, and human rights defender.

Age: 20

Current Location: I was born, raised, and currently live in Spain — 30 minutes outside Barcelona.

Zodiac Sign: Gemini

Beatriz "Bea" Atienza

About Me: Aspiring teacher, chocolate lover, and your local feminist fangirl.

Age: 20

Current Location: I live in a town called Aranjuez — about 45 minutes away from Madrid, Spain.

Zodiac Sign: Hardcore Libra

How did you two meet?

What was your first impression of each other?

ABJ: That she was another version of me I needed to meet. Where has she been all this time? What an amazing girl!

How long have you known each other?

ABJ: Over a year now. April 27, 2021 marked one year since we started talking.

How long have you considered yourselves best friends?

BA: I don’t think there’s a specific moment where we said, “Oh, we’re very close now.” It just kind of flowed.

ABJ: I really can’t say when exactly, but we bonded more over the last few months. Thanks for that, Bridgerton!

What initially sparked your friendship?

ABJ: Nothing brings two fangirls together like fangirling over the same things.

Do you know if you're astrologically compatible? Do you care?

BA: We’ve never really checked. I love to see Libra-related memes and stuff like that, but I’m not really into serious astrology.

ABJ: I really don’t know, but honestly, I don’t care. I know that we are compatible no matter what our astrology signs suggest.

What did you study in school?

ABJ: I studied cinematic production at school, and I am waiting to finalize it with an internship. While waiting to do so, I am working in a factory where my dad works.

BA: I’m almost finished with my third year in college. I’m studying to be a preschool and primary school teacher.

Have you ever lived together?

How often do you text/call/FaceTime each other?

ABJ: We talk practically every day and we try to FaceTime, but sometimes it’s difficult to combine agendas. But we’re messaging, sending each other memes and fandom-related stuff all the time.

What was the last thing you texted about?

ABJ: About Kate and Anthony, the main couple of the second season of Bridgerton, and the book I'm currently reading: Here the Whole Time by Vitor Martins.

What’s one TV show you both agree on?

BA: I can’t really choose one, because we generally think the same: Teen Wolf, Roswell, New Mexico, Bridgerton, and Shadow and Bone.

What's your favorite underrated thing about each other?

BA: Her style! I’ve seen many pictures of her outfits and I love her fashion — it’s casual, but cute and modern, and I envy that in a good way.

ABJ: The way we understand each other perfectly. Even from the beginning of our friendship, we have always understood each other, no matter the subject, the situation, or the "problem."

What is your favorite memory together?

ABJ: It’s not one, per se — it’s the way I can always count on Bea. No matter the issue, fan stuff, important stuff, happy/sad stuff, she’s always there for me.

What’s one random memory you have of each other?

ABJ: Maybe the way our friendship started, because I would have never thought that sending Bea that DM would have created this one-of-a-kind bond.

Which one of you is better at keeping secrets?

ABJ: I’d have to say it's a tie, because we’re both really good at keeping secrets.

BA: I’d say we’re both quite good at it. I’d never betray anyone’s trust, and I know she wouldn’t, either.

What was your biggest fight about?

BA: We've never really had a fight, hehe.

ABJ: We have never fought. Yay, friendship!

Was there ever a time when you considered not being friends?

BA: Nope.

What’s one word you’d use to describe your friendship?

BA: Serendipitous — finding something that makes you happy by chance.

ABJ: I’d go with fascinating. Every day with Bea is so beautiful and exciting.

Why do you think your friendship works?

What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned from each other?

ABJ: That it's always OK to be yourself. No matter how intense or "too much" you are, there will always be someone who will understand you and share that intensity with you.

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