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wildernessuntothemselves · 5 years

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Oppa Knows Best | Part 3

Word Count: 4.8k Genre: Smut, Angst Summary: If there is anything a lot of people can agree on when it comes to college, it’s that college is about much more than just education; it’s a whole transformative experience. The person you were before college is not the same person you will be after college, and no one knows the truth of that statement quite like you do. You just didn’t expect to change so much so fast. Chapter Plot: You were on the dance floor, grinding up on some guy and about to whisper in his ear to take you home when you saw his familiar face, distorted with a rage that was also becoming familiar, charging up to you. You didn’t even have enough time for your heart to sink before he was unceremoniously ripping you out of the man’s arms, seething, “We’re going home.” Warnings: This story contains a very unbalanced power dynamic between the two main characters that is unhealthy and shouldn’t be tolerated irl. If someone treats you this way irl please run. This is a fictional story and the plot is basically just a vehicle for the smut. Contains slutshaming and controlling behavior. Also the dirty talk is painfully corny and pornolike so be warned lol. Oppa kink if it wasn’t obvious. tiny ass breeding kink and semi-public sex Part 1, Part 2 and the rest of my masterlist are in my bio bec tumblr is a dick

You did go to him, more times than you care to admit, and each time it hurt more than the one before. He never let you touch him, and each time you tried—and you did try every single time because you are weak and greedy—he would coil away from you like it physically hurt him. Each time it was like his disgust for your needs, and perhaps you, grew more and more to the point where you were starting to question whether you were unknowingly forcing him into this, manipulating him into doing this for you like he jokingly claims you do sometimes to get your way. But when you had asked him directly about it, he brushed you off carelessly and told you not to be an idiot. You had been visibly distressed but Jaehyun didn’t seem like he was interested in easing your mind, and you, selfishly, didn’t want to rock the boat and end up ruining things for yourself. So for a long time, you swallowed your pride; you were starved for his touch and contended that having his attention albeit how begrudging it might be was better than not having it at all. But eventually the rejection wore you down. It got so bad that you started believing that you must be the most undesirable woman on earth. Being touched by Jaehyun felt infinitely better than having any other man touch you, but as great as the pleasure was, it couldn’t compare to the feeling of being wanted. Because of Jaehyun, to have a partner touch you because they wanted to, to have them ask for—no need your touch as well, was becoming a foreign concept to you. Jaehyun wouldn’t or couldn’t give you that, and it ate you up.

Not one to learn from your mistakes, or maybe too insecure and weak to survive without someone’s tender, loving touch, you longed to go back to your promiscuous days. If in the past you slept around in order to satisfy your physical needs and fill up the hole Jaehyun left in your heart, now you wanted it just to feel wanted again, to feel like a normal woman with a sex drive who can be the target of sexual desires from others too, and not the pristine, sexless porcelain doll of a high-strung small-town boy. But you knew it wasn’t fair to put all the blame on Jaehyun. You knew what you were getting into. You knew it was a bad idea, that you were only hurting yourself this way. You could’ve stood up for yourself… but also, you really couldn’t have. Growing up as the only child of an estranged father and a single mother, you had no one around to take care of you except for Jaehyun. He was the only child of a single parent too but it felt more like he was an orphan. His mother had died giving birth to him and his father, unable to look his at his son without being reminded of the death of the woman he loved, left him in the care of his own mother, Jaehyun’s paternal grandmother. As both your mother and his grandmother were neighbors, and the latter woman being incredibly generous and kind—something she clearly passed on to her grandchild— you ended up spending most of your childhood in her care too, as your mother spent almost all her waking hours doing various odd jobs here and there in order to provide for you. But as sweet as Jaehyun’s grandmother was, she was too old—even back then— to take care of two such young children, and so Jaehyun, taking it upon himself to assume responsibility, was forced to grow up faster than any child is supposed to. You’ve always felt guilty for that—had it not been for his sense of responsibility towards you, he wouldn’t have had to sacrifice that much. He gave up his childhood in order for you to keep yours, which is why you always found it hard to say no to him. What’s this little bit of sacrifice compared to all that he’s done for you? Jaehyun is your savior, plain and simple. He’s your father, mother, brother, friend, and lover all in one. You’ve been in love with this man for years. You’ve wanted him for years, so of course you would jump at the chance to finally be with him in any capacity. Others growing up may have found their sexual awakening in a teen actor or even a cartoon character, but you didn’t need any of that when you had someone as perfect as Jaehyun by your side from day one. When you first started developing a sexual drive, finding an object for it in him had been as natural as the unconditional love that preceded it. Your love and lust for him only grew with time so of course, of course, you never even considered rejecting his “offer”. Even calling it a sacrifice to give up other men and have him instead is a disgusting show of self-martyrization. But you’re selfish. He raised you to see yourself as the number one priority, and so here you are prioritizing your own feelings over his and consciously doing something you know will hurt him because your ego is bruised and you need some meaningless validation. You couldn’t even be rational about this and accept that Jaehyun doesn’t want you that way or act like a grownup and stop what you’re doing with him and tell him you’re going to have sex with other people whether he likes it or not. He’ll throw a huge fuss about it but he’ll come to terms with it eventually. Instead, you’re going behind his back to a seedy club just outside campus looking for an easy hookup that will provide you with those few moments of coveted attention that you can’t get from him. What you didn’t count on was him finding you before you even had the chance to hook up at all. You were on the dance floor, grinding up on some guy and about to whisper in his ear to take you home when you saw his familiar face, distorted with a rage that was also becoming familiar, charging up to you. You didn’t even have enough time for your heart to sink before he was unceremoniously ripping you out of the man’s arms, seething, “We’re going home.” “Woah, man, what the fuck?” Your partner shouts over the music and tries to reach out to you again but Jaehyun quickly pulls you behind him before he gets the chance to touch you. Getting all up in the man’s face, he snarls at him. “Don’t touch her.” “Is this your boyfriend or something?” The man addresses you instead. You see him physically trying to keep from flinching back, not wanting to seem like the weaker man, but it was clear he was scared of Jaehyun. “No—“ “Yes, I am. Now back off.” Jaehyun growls and drags you behind him as he attempts to leave, but then the man does something incredibly stupid. He doesn’t heed Jaehyun’s previous warning and reaches out to grab your free arm, trying to hold you back. He had no sooner touched you than he was on the floor, knocked down by a swift, hard punch from Jaehyun. “I said don’t fucking touch her!” “Oh my god, oppa. What are you doing?!” You shrill, putting your body between him and the man, scared out of your mind and shocked by the uncharacteristic action from Jaehyun. Your best friend was never a violent man. Yes, he got into a couple of fist fights over the years, but nothing this uncalled for or this aggressive. Jaehyun looks at your terrified expression and his face falls. He opens his mouth, looking like he wants to say something but he gets interrupted by security. They order him to leave to the club, but Jaehyun refuses to set a foot outside without you in tow. Initially, you refuse to go with him; upset and rattled by the way he’d just behaved. But the security of the busy club quickly get fed up with the scene the both of you were making—and wanting to disperse the crowd that had formed around you and get things under control again—they end up throwing you both out the back door, telling you to solve your problems with your boyfriend somewhere else. “What were you doing in there?” Jaehyun snarls, standing with you in the deserted alley behind the club. It was scary seeing him like this—like he was possessed by the devil, all warmth fleeing from his face, transforming him into someone you hardly knew. “Dancing,” You mumble, defensive and embarrassed by the way he was regarding you with such distaste. This was new to you. You’ve never directly disobeyed Jaehyun before, not intentionally at least, and not with such a severe reaction. You felt ashamed having disappointed him, but you also felt scared. Now that you were faced with the consequences, you realize how stupid your plan was. Did you really think that you could get away with it? That he wouldn’t find out? Stupid. You flinch when his hand shoots out to grab you by the jaw, and the sharp breath that you take in hurts your lungs, but not more than his words do. “Don’t lie to me. You came here to get fucked. You came here… to this fucking seedy place and tried to hook up with some stranger that could’ve been a rapist or a killer for all you knew and—“ Jaehyun stops mid sentence, looking like he’s on the verge of a breakdown because of you, both angry and incredibly worried. “Do you know how dangerous this is? You couldn’t have pretended to be a good girl for even a month. You’re putting yourself in danger for some dick? Are you such a needy slut that one dick isn’t enough for you?” You should’ve kept quiet and apologized. Let him take you home and prove to him that you could be good and eventually the whole thing will be forgotten, but you were like a cat cornered; frightened and ready to claw the fuck out of the person in front of you in self-defense. “What dick? I didn’t even see it. You won’t let me come near you and you’re always treating me with disgust whenever I come to you.” You say through his fingers that were digging into your cheeks, making your voice come out funny, but neither you nor Jaehyun can find any humor in the situation. “I was taking care of you, you ungrateful bitch. You think I didn’t fucking want it? You think I enjoyed the blue balls I got from seeing you writhing and whining under me while I couldn’t do anything about it?” This comes as a complete shock you. You would’ve never guessed from his reactions that he liked what was happening let alone wanted to take it further with you. Was this even the same person you were fooling around with this past month? Because that guy looked like he’d rather have a million bugs crawl over his skin than to let you touch him, but hearing him now and seeing the way he’s looking at you, you can almost believe him. You just needed proof. “Then why don’t you do something about it now?” You didn’t mean it literally but Jaehyun doesn’t see that or doesn’t care to make the distinction because as soon as the words left your mouth, he was immediately pushing you to the ground, your kneecaps meeting the asphalt with a loud thud. “Your wish is my fucking command, princess.” You don’t have enough brain power to process the pain in your legs when all your attention was directed at Jaehyun’s hands that were deftly undoing his pants right in front of your face. He pulls his cock out and, fuck, you’ve been fantasizing about this exact dick for forever, and you were finally seeing it sober and up close and it’s fucking beautiful like the rest of him is. How he managed to do that with an organ that resembled an overcooked sausage, you didn’t know, but you could feel yourself fucking drooling in anticipation of having him in your mouth. You never thought that the time you would get to finally be with the love of your life, you’d be on your knees in a dirty alley with his figure looming over you, livid and intimidating—but none of that took away from your arousal anyway. “Here’s what you wanted, slut.” He grabs your hair and pushes your face against his cock. “Suck.” You were stuck in the dilemma; on the one hand you did want this, so badly, but on the other hand you didn’t want to prove to him that you were so hungry for dick that you’d just give someone a blow job in public. You’re only like this because it’s him, because you love him and because you want him. He gets impatient with your sudden hesitancy. His grip tightens around your jaw, his blunt fingernails digging into your skin. “You wanna start acting like you’re a good girl now? Too late for that, baby. Do what you’re told or I’ll make you.” Your cheeks hurt. Your legs hurt. And he’s looking down at you like it wouldn’t be wise to disobey him. Quickly weighing your options, you decide that didn’t have any desire to see his threat through, especially if it included him deciding to deprive you of him for disobeying him when you just finally have him within your reach. You relax your jaw and open your mouth wide, taking in his half-hard cock. Immediately, his hold loosens on your jaw, turning from punishing to guiding. His cock feels amazing on your tongue, so hot and velvety that you don’t even have to think about what you’re doing, your tongue naturally running up and down his length, caressing him this and that way and before you know it, he’s fully hard. This makes it much harder for you to go down his entire length now that it is longer and thicker, so you try to use your hands to stroke the part of his cock that you can no longer reach. But Jaehyun is having none of that, grabbing your wrists and holding them in a vice grip over your head. “I said suck, not touch. Is your head so empty that you can’t understand a simple command?” You shake your head violently, upset that you’ve displeased him. “I’m sorry, oppa.” “I’ll make you fucking sorry. Open up.” Jaehyun hardly waits until you’ve opened your mouth to push his cock inside. The first thrust is too harsh, the tip hitting the back of your throat and making you gag. For a split second, your body sounds an alarm and your muscles get ready to fight to pull away. Despite his threatening words, you knew Jaehyun would stop if you asked him to. You were going to do just that, but you look up to see his mouth hanging open and his eyes staring at you with a need more intense than you’ve ever seen in anyone’s eyes before while he stands still and waits for you to tell him to stop and take the pleasure away. Suddenly the thought of choking on his dick seemed like a pleasant way to go if it meant getting to see him look at you like that for a little longer. You suckle a little at the head of his cock that was still inside your mouth, savoring the deep moan that reverberates inside his chest before you open your mouth wider and push your tongue out, signaling for him to continue. “Pathetic,” He scoffs, but his tone was soft, almost purring. Still holding your arms above your head, he uses them to keep you in place as he thrusts back into your mouth. This time he doesn’t stop when you gag around him. He keeps hitting the back of your throat incessantly, forcing you to try to relax in order to accommodate him while the wall of your throat close up reflexively around him, attempting to push him out but only succeeding in providing more stimulation against his cock. It’s hard to keep your eyes open when each harsh thrust makes you flinch but you try to anyway, wanting to burn the look of pleasure on his face into your memory. And what a look it is. From the way his heavy lids framed his smoldering eyes, to his lips that were wet and plump from biting at them, and finally to the periodic tick in his jaw when the pleasure got too much—Jaehyun’s face was made to express pleasure. For his part, Jaehyun was staring right back at you, seemingly hypnotized with the way you’re take his cock so well. Every time you would gag around him, his deep groans would turn breathy for a second and fingers would twitch around your wrists, before he quickly regained control, tightening his hold on you and chasing that tightness again. Soon though, you have to stop him, your sore throat tightening up and threatening to choke you. Your arms thrash in his grasp, trying to convey to him to stop. He immediately frees you and takes a step back, pulling his cock at of your mouth and letting you breath. Your hands fall to your thighs, hitting them, and strings of saliva still connect your lips to his cock and run down your chin. Already missing his cock in your mouth, you take him back in your hands, the angry red marks around your wrist barely registering in the back of your mind as you start stroking him while suckling on his engorged top. This time he doesn’t stop you, looking fondly down at you instead. “Fuck. I want to call you a good girl for taking my cock so well, and making oppa feel so good.” You preen at the praise you’ve longed to receive from him, the acknowledgement that he could want you too, but he deflates your ego just as quickly. “But it just makes me think of all the dicks you sucked in order to get this good, and I just wanna punish you for being such a slut.” “That’s not fair, oppa.” You whine, pushing his shirt up and peppering kisses all over his stomach in an attempt to pacify him, but it doesn’t work. He yanks your head away by your hair and pushes his cock against your face, rubbing the sticky mess all over your cheeks. When he’s satisfied with the job he says, “And now you look like a slut too, just like you wanted. Are you happy now?” “No,” You pout, running your hands up and down his stomach, “I want you inside of me.” “Hopeless” He sneers, but you can feel his muscles quivering under your touch and you know he wants you too. He pulls you up to your feet and pushes you against the wall. The rough, exposed bricks dig into your skin even through your clothes, but you can hardly pay any mind to it when Jaehyun’s hands are under your skirt and pulling your underwear down to your knees. He lines himself up with your entrance, the head of his cock pressing against your opening but he doesn’t push in yet. “Is this what my little whore wants? To be fucked in a dirty alley where anyone who happens to walk by can see how easy she is? Is this what you were going to do with that fucker back there? Were you going to let him take you against the wall like this?” “Oppa, please,” You try to lift your hips up to push him in but his hands grab your waist and push you back against the wall roughly, growling in your ear, “Tell me, slut.” You can hear in his voice that he wasn’t going to back down so you say what you know would appease him, using his own protectiveness and possessiveness over you in your favor. “No, oppa. I wouldn’t let anyone else do this, only oppa. You’re always so good to me. I know you’ll take care of me.” As you suspected, your words quickly disarm him; his expression loses much of its severity and he relents, thrusting into you and giving you what you’ve been craving for weeks. His cock feels so good fucking in and out of you. You don’t know what he was doing different than the other guys you’ve been with, and maybe nothing is different at all, but when you’re with him it’s like all this time you had only been using a fraction of your sensory nerves but he found the switch to turn the rest of them on, making his touch ten times more intense than anything you’ve felt before. “You’re damn right.” He huffs, stroking your hair softly but fucking you hard, your back hitting the wall with every thrust. You’re going to be all bruised up tomorrow but you didn’t care. You felt euphoric. “Oppa will take care of you... fuck, angel, you’re so tight—ah” “Do you like it, oppa? Am I making you feel good?” You coax, needing to hear it from him. “Yes, angel, so good. You’re making oppa feel so good. You’re such a good girl.” He praises, enraptured. You almost cream yourself at that, proud that you were the one making him feel this good. “You just need to stop being so goddamn stubborn and listen to me.” “I will oppa.” I only want to please you. You want to say, but you’ve said enough already. You don’t need to make it worse. “Good girl. Good girl.” He repeats like a mantra. Peppering kisses on your face, his thrusts become slower but impossibly deeper, and he starts panting. “You’re my good girl.” You can tell he’s close, and you try to help him along, clenching your pussy around him and encouraging him to cum. “I want you to cum, oppa. I want to do for you what you’ve done for me so many times. Let me do this for you, oppa. You must’ve been holding back for so long. Let me take care of you.” “Baby, fuck, fuck, wh—where do you want me to cum?” Jaehyun speeds up again, his thrusts erratic and sloppy. “Inside me, oppa. Cum in my pussy.” That breaks Jaehyun. With one final thrust, he pins you against the wall and his hard body, his cock buried all the way inside of you and shooting his hot cum deep into your womb. Thankfully, you are on birth control and there is no risk of you getting knocked up by Jaehyun in a dirty alley. However, when he pulls back to watch his cum seeping out of you then catches some of it on his fingers and pushes it back inside of you, fascinated and clearly turned on by the sight, you wish for a second that you could get pregnant by this, knowing how absolutely wild it would drive him. Moaning at the thought, you snap him out of his reverie. His eyes still contain some residual anger in them, and he levels you with them. “I should leave you here like this, let whoever passes by here get a piece of you, maybe even some nice people can give you that gangbang you wanted. Do you like the sound of that, angel?” “No, oppa.” You clutch onto his shirt even though he makes no move to actually leave you here. You know he would never, ever do that. “Why, isn’t that what you came here for? To get fucked and thrown away once you’re all used up.” His fingers pump in and out of you, rapidly building you up towards an orgasm, “Why bother with the courtship when you can just stand here with your ass in the air and let whoever wants a piece of you take you?” “Oppa, don’t say things like that. You know that’s not what I want.” You whine, burying your face in his chest, and moaning into it as he pulls his fingers out and spreads his cum all over your pussy. Jaehyun sighs, “What am I supposed to think when you come to a place like this instead of coming to your oppa?” “You wouldn’t let me touch you.” You mumble against his chest, unable to breathe properly with the way he’s rubbing your clit harshly. “Because it’s about you, not me. It’s always been about you.” He buries his face in your neck, giving it big, wet kisses. “I wanted you to feel good. “I feel good when I make you feel good.” He jerks back at your words and stares at you, regarding you with a strange look that you couldn’t understand and it freaks you out, so you add hurriedly, “I mean, I can’t enjoy sex if my partner isn’t enjoying it as well.” “Oh, ok.” He frowns slightly, “You can touch me all you want from now on then.” He pushes two fingers into you, hissing when they slide in easily. “Fuck, your pussy is still loose from my cock. Did I go too hard on you, angel?” “No, oppa, you were perfect.” “That’s my girl.” He murmurs, making your heart flutter. “Do you want another finger?” “Yes, please.” He pushes a third finger in, and that lovely little stretch is back. His fingers pump fast in and out of you while his thumb works on your clit, his cum combined with your juices producing obscene squelching noises that bounce off the walls of the alleyway. Just as you’re reaching your high, he presses his lips to yours, setting you off. The kiss is messy, your tongues seeming to communicate in a language you didn’t understand, and as you get down from the high, he soothes you with pretty kisses all over your face. When your orgasm is long past you, Jaehyun pulls your underwear back up into place and does his best to wipe the mess he’s made on your face with the sleeve of his shirt. “I love you.” He confesses, looking straight into your eyes with unwavering confidence, just like he always did, and just like always you did, you immediately avert your eyes. It’s silent for a few seconds as he waits for you to say it back. It was a habit of his, despite you rarely reciprocating the words—and even when you did, they always came out awkward and forced lest they give away your undying, very different kind of love for him, but he cherished them anyway. When he’s sure he’s not getting the words out of you this time, he carries on, “There is nothing, nobody, I care about more than I care about you. I will do everything in my power to protect you from everything and everyone, including yourself. Whatever reason you think I’m doing this for other than to protect you… it’s not true. The world is a terrible place and it’s because of people, most of all men. They eat up beautiful, innocent girls like you then spit them back out, broken and scared, and go search for their next victim. I may not always do or say the right thing, but at least you can be sure that it’s all to keep you safe. That’s all I ever wanted. You know that, right?” He looks exhausted and you realize just how much you hurting him. You feel guilty because you already knew all of that very well. You knew that Jaehyun was only looking out for you. He wasn’t doing this just to spite you or control you. He had stopped sleeping around too because he knew it wasn’t fair to ask you to stop hooking up with people while he continued to. And he stuck by his promise; he never tried to hook up with someone again unlike you, even though you were the one who was getting some release while he had nothing but his own hand. But it’s not going to be like that anymore, you’ll help him too. You’ll both help each other. You’ll stick to your promise too and maybe, maybe, someday you’ll find someone that you’ll love at least half as much as you love Jaehyun. Anxious by your prolonged silence, Jaehyun brushes his thumb over your cheek, prodding you for a response. You give him the most reassuring smile you can muster and say, “I know, oppa. I know.” •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• A/N: Feedback means the entire world to me and I would love you forever if you sent me a little message telling me what you think of the story so far and like what do you think Jaehyun’s deal is lol

#there is a small hint in the dialogue here #also now we know why the oc is so attached #jaehyun smut #jaehyun angst #jaehyun fics #jaehyun fanfics #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun imagines #nct smut #nct angst #nct fics #nct fanfics #nct scenarios #nct imagines

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szopenhauer · 4 years

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have you got any brothers or sisters who annoy you? my sister annoys me indeed

as a younger teenager, did you have any older guys/girls hit on you? as a teenager nobody hit on me

would you ever want to be changed into a vampire? doubt it, the only thing that would truly interest me about it is immortality which isn’t actually living forever as even sun can kill you and knowing my luck that would happen fast

does the thought of dying give you cold chills? kinda how many times has someone called you boring, if ever? several times because I don’t travel, I don’t party, I don’t like sports and out of some other reasons has anyone ever told you that you had “so many” months to live? not exactly as a teen, were you trusted to be alone with a boyfriend/girlfriend? as a teen I had no real bf/gf do your parents both have a job? my mom’s retired already are you currently unemployed? if not, what’s your job? I am where do you belong? nowhere?... were you anyone’s first kiss? I was what is the color of your cellular telephone? black what color are your gloves/mittens? I have few pairs when was the last time you listened to the radio; and do you remember which song was the last you heard on there? not counting online radio that I still rarely listen to (usually just during Christmas time, that special playlist on rmf) - years and I don’t remember the last song because I didn’t think it will be the last one and that just made me sad do you think English the hardest language to learn? noooo do you clean under your nails with safety pins? I use toothpicks how long after your shower do you walk around naked, or in your towel, until you decide to get dressed? I get dressed right away does it bother you that so many people start going out like a week or two before valentine’s day, as if it’s just because they don’t want to be alone? that’s really lame, I’m sorry for them what do(es) you(r mom) grow in your garden? lots of stuff what do you think of facial piercings? meh, some are ugly, some are ok did your shoe laces come with your shoes? yeah but they still have zippers as I wouldn’t bother to own shoes with just laces do you have any cds you bought at the concert?. never bought a CD at the concert what does your second oldest sibling do for a living? I have only one sibling and what she does is not your business (pun intended) are there any beanie babies with your birthday? Beanie Boos Carrots - rabbit - style 36031 Julep - monkey - style 36056 Pashun - dog - style 36206 Beanie Babies Bunga Raya - bear - style 4615 - (birth year 2002) Dewi Y Ddraig - dragon - style 46157 - (birth year 2010) D'Vine - monkey - style 40767 - (birth year 2008) Flower - meerkat - style 46155 - (birth year 2010) Niles - camel - style 4284 -(birth year 2000) Peace - bear - style 4053 - (birth year 1996) Peepers - bushbaby - style 40795 - (birth year 2009) TOUR Teddy - bear - style 40347 - (birth year 2006) Teenie Beanie Boppers Terrific Tessa - style 0334 Boppers Lovely Lily - style 0223

what color is your cat? it was all black with yellow eyes

do you own any buddha? nooo, why would I do you know what color hazel really is? .. my eyes? XD what color is your toaster? don’t own one what color is your webcam? white but I don’t use it as I have no mic, I tried to buy one but they never work so I prefer to use my cellphone as a cam instead do you have anything real gold? I think I still own that one tiny item (necklace with the letter Z) and if I do I will probably sell it

Do you own any adult colouring books? those gimme anxiety When was the last time you got some new headphones? mine are about 5 years old

Do you know anyone whose name starts with the letter X? I don’t :o

Name a food that you dislike the texture of. pears

Describe the cover illustration of the book closest to you. it has the Stranger things villain on it behind the room with no. 11

Do you wear a mask when you go to the store? of course, if you don’t - I hate you!

Are you expecting a package right now? am not

What is one thing you hate about summer? mosquitos for an example

Did you go outside today? just our garden

Have you ever received a misdiagnosis from a doctor? yup

Do you have a book that you’ve read multiple times? I never reread books

Do you enjoy babysitting? ugh...

What was your favorite book you had to read for school? I used to like Cierpienia młodego Wertera - that was stupid of me

Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? in pre-school

What’s one childhood dream that has stuck with you? my own apartment

Would you want to re-live your childhood over again if you could? I believe

Which do you like more: being an adult or being a kid? being a kid

Did your parents smoke or drink when you were growing up? nope

Do you enjoy bonfires? they were fine

Have you ever ridden in an ambulence? couple of times

Do you know anyone who used to be loving, but then turned cold? that would be me...

What color are your bedroom walls? green and yellow

Is there an old friend that you miss and would like to reconnect with? I tried...

Have you been bullied? all of my school years basically

Which talent show, if any, would you most like to audition for? I have no talent

Do you feel like time goes by fast, or slow? both slow and fast

Who do you know who has died of cancer? my aunt that I didn’t really know

Have you ever stayed overnight in a hospital, and if so, what for? couple of times, once even almost entire month, long story (stories actually)

Have you ever been so angry you wanted to sue someone? hahaha

Have you ever been a victim of racism? I’m white so not really

Did you go to prom? nah

Are you an aunt or uncle? yep

Do you feel like you are currently in a state of suffering? and that not all of your basic needs are being met? If so, how long have you been in a state of suffering? I’ve always been and it only got worse

Life isn’t fair. True or false? it seems

Name a few people who seem to have everything handed to them. born rich

Do you pray less or more than you did 5 years ago? more

Do you pray a lot? not enough

Have you ever used an epi pen? hope I won’t have to

What was the name of the biggest bully in your high school? HS didn’t have big bullies but for me that was A.L.

How many kids do you want to have? 0

Do you want to get married? hmm...

Best date you’ve been on? dunno

Dream date? *shrug*

Ever kissed someone on New Year’s? never

Have you ever been in so much pain you prayed that you would die? other kind of suffering

Who always tries to stop you whenever you try to go after your dreams? life/world so God I guess

are you in love with llamas? they’re cool

do you like hats? beanies and those winter ones in animal shapes

have you ever had surgery? not yet

do you have an enemy? some I call this way

do you want to save the trees? yes

what size shoe do you wear? 38-39

do you cook? I do not

do you like taking pictures? at times

pink flamingos? cute for the garden :3

do you like spiders? I don’t mind them

do you own an mp3 player? but I don’t use it anymore, not even sure if it still works

why are you hitting yourself? self harm

what’s your mom’s name? personal

what about your dad? same

have you ever won anything? yep

is revenge sweet? in movies might be and sometimes I laugh when ppl get what they deserve, sorry not sorry?

have you ever had someone lie for you so you wouldn’t get in trouble? sort of

who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Spongebob

do you like night or day better? night

do you like finding nemo? nooo

plaid or polka dots? why not stripes?

have you ever done yoga? a bit

what posters do you have on your wall? no posters

do you wear dresses a lot? noooo

how many school dances have you been to? all of them besides prom

can you swim? can’t

don’t you just want to mass murder all barbie dolls? why? :o

who was the last person you were under a blanket with? my gf

name something great that happened today? for example - Choices chapters were great

who was the last person’s voice you heard? mom’s

did you speak to your mother today? of course

what color is your hair? naturally dark brown

when was the last time you talked to one of your siblings? online or irl?

how did you wake up this morning? by myself

how many letters are in your last name? 11

do you still talk to the last person you kissed? in general because at this very moment she’s asleep

do you believe that everything happens for a reason? not everything

do you ever pretend to text/talk on the phone when you’re in public? yeah have you ever had spinach? if not, would you ever want to? I ate it before don’t you hate when the wires pop out of your bra and poke you all day? my bra has no wires am i the only one who likes to go grocery shopping? you’re not alone

is anything wrong with your eyes? possibly do you ever write notes on your hand? used to last time you cried? why? I was moved by the game on my cellphone

when is the last time you were in a swimming pool? in middle school have you ever fallen backwards on a chair? I don’t recall what do you feel like watching? nothing atm do you ever try to write with your non-dominant hand? with feet too who makes you laugh the most? my gf and my dad who starred in your last dream? besides me - no one that I know do you regret doing something today? maybe do you think you’re old? I’m not but I often feel like I am are you afraid of the dark? at home only - especially mirrors and windows in the dark are scary

sometimes, do you wish you were someone else? not a particular person have you ever told anyone you were ok when you really weren’t? it’s bad but I did that before do you talk a lot? do I?

which member of your family are you closest to? dad

would you ever apply to be on reality tv? doubt it do you have a hard time letting things go? I guess have you ever struggled with your weight? slightly when you are out with your friends are you loud and outgoing or shy and reserved? depends do you like to stay in your pajamas all day long? whatever in high school did you have a lot of friends? do you still keep in touch? group and not really at what age did you get your period? 13? fuzzy socks: yay or nay? yay

When was the last time you held a puppy? years ago

Was the person that last slept over at your house a boy or girl? girl Who’s name first comes to mind that starts with the letter “P”? Paulina and Patrycja

Do you have any kind of jewelry on at the moment? not at the moment Would you say you use “lol” too often? get used to this!

When was the last time you vacuumed a room? I mop the floor

You can only shop at one store for the rest of your life, what store is it? but food? :o

Have you ever donated to a cause? yup

0 notes

patronsaintofprincesses · 7 years

Note

Hey can you answer all 64 questions for me? Thanks 😘

I’d like to thank @unluckymess for indulging me, and my need to lay myself bare on the internet and talk a bunch, you’re the real MVP, an excellent friend. 😚

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? Mm yes, in a way. I like to have my bases covered so, I believe that I’m not real, and I believe that I am real but in a simulation and I can believe that I’m not real and still in a simulation and I can believe that no one is real and I can believe that only the simulation is real and I can believe that everything is real and I can believe that simulations aren’t real etc. So, sorta.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? 3. But I’m not afraid of the dark, I love the dark, it’s the people that misuse the dark that I pity and loathe. The dark is comforting, and natural– I love the dark.

3. The person you would never want to meet? Let’s be honest, Mr. Cheeto-Fingers #notmypresident guy is the most distateful man I’ve had the pleasure of never meeting. I’d like to keep it that way.

4. What is your favorite word? Settlement. Someone asked what my favorite word was in oh 8th grade? and my mind scrambled and said settlement and I stand by that brain scramble lol.

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? There’s a Celtic thing that says Hazel and there’s an astrology thing that says Pine mm however, I’d want to be a Peach tree v:

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? Can I brush my teeth later :“)

7. What shirt are you wearing? A pale pink tee that says “Nevermore” in antique lettering and has a Raven opening it’s beak to caw.

8. What do you label yourself as? THE Boring Princess. San THE Bore. I own my dullness, I enjoy my royal duties in the Boring kingdom.

9. Bright room or dark room? D a r k but with a pink antique garden quilt covered in flowers and blackout/ lace curtains and dark wood furniture and glass end tables and ceramic vases in olive and navy filled with dahlias and white silk flowers.

10. What were you doing at midnight last night? Reading. Messaging @barnsburntdownnow @silver9mm (I adore you ma'am)

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? 16 was a good age, graduating high school and being District Spelling Champion has been the highlight of my life so far ;)

12. Who told you they loved you last? @unluckymess and I love you as well 😇

13. Your worst enemy? Evita Perón said Time, but I don’t want to plagiarize. I have to say, energy then?

14. What is your current desktop picture? My pup, he’s turning seven on December 11th!

15. Do you like someone? Sure I like a lot of people :) but I’m not attracted? to anyone really, since I’m abstinent until marriage and real commitment-phobic so 😅

16. The last song you listened to? The Most Peculiar Day of Your Life by the Hoosiers. (my third favorite band)

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? myself, probably

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? Also myself le mao.

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? I’d choose Kim Jong Un and I’d have him sign over the dictatorship of North Korea over to me and get those people some gotdamn internet and H-E-Bs.

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) my eyes are pretty expressive, I’ve been told.

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? I’d probably be really scruffy, with curly hair, tortoiseshell glasses, and be real sweet. I’d go to several bookstores, chew on my pen cap, mope about looking artsy, I’d cry a lot, and probably blog about toxic masculinity. I’d try out the whole masturbation as a guy thing and also the whole prostate thing, and then get drunk at a bar.

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? Nope. Everyone knows everything about me at this point le mao.

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? Getting exactly what I want? Is that unique? Mm dying and the headstone people misspelling my name so my gravesite/cremation urn says Sam Hernandez. Ugh.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. !!! My go-to, is whole grain bread, egg white, spinach, mozzarella, parmesan, green bell pepper, tomato, cucumber, mushroom, and ground black pepper.

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? I’m going to give it to my mum, so she can gas up her car ^^

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? Australia, to get bitten by the elusive taipan

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? PINA COLADAS. um rum? Uhhhhhhhhhhh premixed Pina coladas???

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? Always be humble and kind.

29. What is your favorite expletive? Bless Your Heart

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? The smiley face zipper case I keep my photograph print outs in.

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? Mmm I feel like saying my birth is a bit too gallows, so I’m going to say, agreeing to marry my ex-fiancé.

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Tibet?

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? I’m going to ask for a business card à la Fairy Godmother (Shrek 2), be proactive, because when my mother passes, I can bring her back. I told her that she has to outlive me and I meant that.

34. What was your last dream about? Falling

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]? My buddy, I’ve never been good at anything in my life. I’m an excellent speller, a reading prodigy, and average in every other aspect.

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? Yes, thrice during manic episodes. Twice for when a dog bit me.

37. Have you ever built a snowman? Nope. I have yet to see snow

38. What is the color of your socks? I’m not wearing socks but I only like grey socks and beige liners

39. What type of music do you like? Alternative/Country/UK Pop/Rock

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? Sunsets, please and thank you.

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? Coconut cream pie, from Sonic (after dark)

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) TEXAS. T E X A S

43. Do you have any scars? Oh yeah, plenty ^^ on my face, my arms, my foot. I’m kind of clumsy and I don’t mind scars so I never applied the vitamin E.

44. What do you want to be when you graduate? A graduate lol all joking aside, a librarian? A kept girl? A strong, independent bookworm? Something alright.

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I’d like to have been born in the 33rd century. (mm if not possible, then I would like to be indestructible) (if not feasible, then I guess I’d like to have perfect night vision)

46. Are you reliable? No

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? “What is the most profound thing we have said thus far?”

48. Do you hold grudges? Nope

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? A dragon (uh a scary bone eating bird with a nice, sweet snake)

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? The first time I discussed anything with my conscience? Mm really, any conversation I’ve had with myself has gotten pretty unusual.

51. Are you a good liar? HA maybe over text but irl I begin to giggle and avert my eyes and it’s awful no one let’s me get away with anything

52. How long could you go without talking? I went a whole day once for the GLSEN Day of Silence in April 2012. Maybe I could go longer? Mm I’d like to be mute. That would be interesting.

53. What has been you worst haircut/style? They’ve all been great, particularly the ones I cut by myself from 2008-2012 I don’t know what you are trying to imply c:

54. Have you ever baked your own cake? Is this a euphemism?

55. Can you do any accents other than your own? Sort of an English accent, and sort of an Australian accent. Oh but I have a natural accent when speaking Spanish and a Texas accent pops up with some words in English.

56. What do you like on your toast? Fr e sh avo cado (free Sha vacadoo) obviously (if unavailable, I’ll take honey, cinnamon, butter, sugar, beans, eggs, strawberry jam, peach preserves etc.)

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? A lady, for @silver9mm@barnsburntdownnow for LETTER #6

58. What would be you dream car? An Aston Martin is what I liked in 2008—actually my dream car would be an indestructible flying bathosphere that could also teleport and drive itself. I’m waiting, 2020.

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. I do sing, mm well ahem, I don’t like showers I like baths. Sometimes I’ll turn off the lights and bathe in the dark, when I’m feeling overwhelmed or hopeless or I just don’t know who I’m fooling etc. Sometimes I’ll play music and place my phone facedown on the tub, let my head sink beneath the water, and the sound vibrates/echoes throughout and it is so settling. Ahem, sometimes bathing is my me time, where I’ll let my mind wander to something racy, and with the steam fogging up my mind I’ll get helplessly turned on, and just lounge in the hot water fluttering my inner muscles until I either orgasm or cry lol.

60. Do you believe in aliens? Yes. But do aliens believe in me? Lol.

61. Do you often read your horoscope? No but I do like those moodboards/aesthetics/text posts concerning my signs 😇

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? R in middle school, X in high school and now, probably S.

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? Dinosaurs are neat but I’m a Dragon! kinda gal.

64. What do you think about babies? Cute and scary and gross and wonderful and delicate and perfect and miniature and I want none and ten

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of. Message me 👻 I’ll answer anything y'all.

If y'all would like to send me any other asks (anonymous or public) I tag them as Ask Thing and I’ll answer literally everything. Thanks y'all!

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oxfordeliterp · 7 years

Photo

CONGRATULATIONS, NEHA!

You have been accepted to play the role of ARIA BELLEFONTE with the faceclaim of CRYSTAL REED. Please create your account and send it to the main in the next 24 hours. First of all, we would like to apologize for the delay regarding your application and thank you for your cooperation. We certainly hope it wasn’t too much of an inconvenience, because we are so excited to have you and your Aria on the dashboard that, to us, a day worth of delay felt incredibly late. Your application showed clearly and loudly that you connect extremely well to your character and that you understand her to perfection. Personally, I believe you demonstrated you get Aria’s dynamic with Elizabeth so well that, if she were still alive, I would have no problem giving you both characters, and that is no understatement.

OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

Name and pronouns:

Hi guys! I’m Neha and I prefer the she/her pronouns

Age:

Time-zone:

EST

Activity level:

I can have a pretty high activity level because I’m on summer break! I start work in a week, but even then I’ll only be part time.

Triggers:

No triggers!

IN CHARACTER INFORMATION

Desired character:

Aria Bellefonte. I chose her because in a lot of ways I can relate to her, especially in life irl. My friend actually pointed her out to me when we were both going through your rp and said, “look, that’s you”. Apathy, though not to as high of a degree as Aria, I’ve been told is something of a specialty of mine (though I swear I try not to be as pessimistic as I come out to be). Of course, not a great introduction to me as a person and I promise I’m not horrible, that’s just what really connected me to her, because I have that aspect of not caring but I’m still explained as usually the happiest in the room by my friends. All a mystery. I also really loved the part of her story that defines her, the part about Elizabeth being the first thing/person she really, really cared about. And the “gal pal” love doesn’t hurt.

Gender and pronouns of the character:

Cis female, she/her

Changes:

none!

Traits:

Hedonistic- Aria is a reveller, and has been since birth. Why not, when you have anything you would ever want and more at your fingertips? The drinking started early with champagne, thousand dollar bottles of wine, and hundred year old cognac. It was old hat by the time she turned eighteen, then it turned to sex, drugs, and adrenaline.

Reckless- The drugs and alcohol are just stand ins for what Aria really craves — the quickening of her heartbeat, the pumping of her veins, that rush of adrenaline is the only thing that makes her feel alive, makes her feel like she may not be a robot or a block of ice after all. It was part of the reason she loved Elizabeth at first, before it turned into something so much deeper than that. Now that she’s gone, Aria has no more outlet, and might be heading for a crash sometime soon

Intuitive- Aria Bellefont is not smart. She wasn’t dumb, but she certainly wasn’t Oxford levels of smart, something established long before her eyes first alighted on ivy-covered walls. The thing she is though, is intuitive. Maybe it comes from a lifetime of observing human behavior from an emotional distance, or maybe it just comes from the fact that if she couldn’t beat them through the books, she’d have to at least keep up with them on the social side of things.

Nihilistic- Of course this is kind of a given, but it’s important to note how Elizabeth swept into Aria’s life and altered her perception of the world. Going from caring about nothing to loving something, one thing with all your heart is a huge change, and having it ripped away from you hurts worse than anything, perhaps proving that you were always right — but now, you don’t want to be anymore.

Extras:

Major- International Relations, because it is one of the easier majors and she’s pretty sure she could fairly easily become an ambassador due to her family money and the international connections that come with it. To say that she doesn’t care about her major would be an understatement. She wasn’t as much persuaded to do IA, as much as it was forcing her to do IA. It doesn’t hurt that her mother is already the French ambassador to Belgium.

Family- To say the Bellefonte family is old money is like saying water is wet. The thing is, even Aria’s parents don’t quite know how old their money is. Rumors say that they can trace their lineages back to the old nobility of France and Russia, but who, how, and when is all lost to the sands of time. One thing is for sure, they are rich beyond comprehension, and take it for granted too. But money isn’t everything, and the bonds between the three are brittle from the coldness that surrounds this family. Aria’s mother and father live in separate countries for “work” and as far as Aria’s concerned, the only thing tying her to them is money. So, as King Midas discovered long ago, wealth can be a poison, and it has poisoned this family perhaps beyond repair.

Sexuality- Aria’s never been much one to put labels on things, partially because she just doesn’t care enough to. Poor v rich, sinful v pure, liberal v conservative, gay v straight, none of it matters to her (a viewpoint that is very easy to carry through her privileged life). So putting a label on her sexuality has never been a priority. She likes who she likes, she hooks up with who she hooks up with, and usually it’s just spur of the moment. Perhaps it means something that she’s only truly loved someone in mind, body, and soul, but Aria isn’t about to go psychoanalyzing it just yet.

Aesthetics: there’s some stuff i made and some stuff i reblogged here: http://neharps.tumblr.com/tagged/aria

PARA SAMPLE

The news found her in someone else’s bed, head pounding and stomach turning. The messenger was a callous and cold campus alert text reading: “Oxford student body found, counseling available if needed.” She didn’t know it at the time, but that text was the end of the world as she knew it. The light didn’t go all at once, it faded slowly, starting with the text, and ending with the sorrowful face of the first person she saw that morning. “She’s dead Aria. Elizabeth’s dead.” She should have known the pit in her stomach wasn’t from the alcohol.

Aria had never reacted quite the same emotionally to anything as a normal person did. When she was six and her cat died, she had stared at him in “quiet reflection”, then ran off to go play with her other toys. As her parent’s marriage broke down, she had looked at it with apathy that sometimes even bridged on a sick sense of satisfaction. Things and people didn’t mean quite as much to her as they meant to other people, but in this case, she was perfectly with the norm, cycling through the first two stages of grief almost instantly.

At first, shock and denial. It just simply had not happened. They had been together last night, a night Aria could barely remember filled with booze, drugs, and the general revelling of two girls who could do and be anything they wanted. It was sad, wasn’t it? That she couldn’t remember the last night they’d spent together. They’d left each other at some point in the night though, and next thing she knew it, her best friend in the world was dead, lying in some cold morgue on a slab, the light in her eyes gone.

It couldn’t all be gone, that was the thing. Elizabeth’s eyes, so full of life and love, cosmic wonders in themselves couldn’t be flat and dull. Her lips, soft and pink, curving gently over fond smiles and boisterous laughter couldn’t be cold. To never see the indescribable face Elizabeth made when she took a shot, to never laugh until they were wheezing, to never touch her lips again, it was unthinkable, unlivable. A stupid, scary lie that wasn’t about to fool her.

And though the pain was immediate, the guilt came later, stage two. They had been together, they had been together, until they hadn’t. She could have saved Elizabeth, god knew Elizabeth saved Aria everyday. It didn’t take long for Aria to convince her it was her fault. They were best friends and more, they were supposed to protect each other, know each other’s limits, and have those bad gut feelings before things went wrong. But quickly, as the police reports and gossip starting spreading, those feelings started to pale in comparison to another: anger.

Emotion was something of a new thing for Aria, introduced to her by the girl she’d love to her death. This emotion in particular had been one of the strongest she’d ever experienced. “Seeing red” was a phrase she finally understood, and a fire started to burn, and burn, turning the ice queen into something much darker, someone whose disconnected from the world was finally going to come in handy. See, when she cut down the person or people that had made this happen, she wouldn’t even blink an eye, or feel a thing. It was what made her dangerous.

And so, the person that had made Aria lighter, better, was finally bringing her down deeper into the world she had built around herself, a world where nothing mattered easily turning into a place where nothing mattered but revenge. The world had taken the one thing she cared about, and that was unforgivable.

#accepted #aria bellefonte

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alicedoessurveys · 7 years

Text

165 Questions

(this took a couple days to complete so I don't know if the answers will even make sense haha)

did you pay attention to anything you were being taught in health class? we didn't really have a ‘health class’ at our school. we had a whole day once a term where our usual lessons were cancelled and we were all split off into different groups to learn all that shit. i used to stay home on those days because the routine change sent my anxiety sky high

what are your feelings regarding shopping? i like it when I'm in the right mood

do you think people have any misconceptions about you? i think people sometimes mistake me for being rude or stuck up when its actually that I'm quite shy

have you ever worn fishnets? Nope

do you go somewhere to get your eyebrows done? my sister’s house

do you believe prayer really works? i do, especially after this week

do you have one best friend who is always there for you? kind of

describe one of your most emotional farewells. not really had any emotional farewells

have you ever been tied up? eh, nope.. well not in a serious way :’)

how many times have you been cussed out? i dont think i really have been in a genuine way, only ever jokingly

does it bother you when people ask personal questions? not really, if it did i wouldn't have a tumblr just for surveys haha

do you know anyone who’s been in jail? dont think so nope

have you ever considered acupuncture? Nope i cant do needles

have you ever watched the same sex undress? only when it happens in films/tv but never watched a guy get fully naked aha

have you ever seen the last person you kissed cry? Nope

have you ever seen your mom or dad drunk? Yeah, but only a handful of times

do you enjoy mario games? not really played Mario games tbh

do you think that necessities should be free? (ex. food, toilet paper) not sure

does it bother you when dogs lick you? i love my dogs but i don't really like being licked, i don't like the feeling of it especially on my face or feet

do you feed your pets human food? Occasionally, but we always double check before that its nothing poisonous or anything

which is worse: being sexist or racist? dont even get me started. They're both as bad as each other. The thing about racism is that its never picked up on when it happens to a white person. We experience it too, but for some reason it doesn't count if you're white.. Racism is NEVER okay and it affects ALL races. White people, black people and every skin colour in between.

do you think suicide is selfish? Only if the way you do it affects someone else. for example, jumping in front of a train or car, or throwing yourself of the top floor of a busy shopping centre in front of loads of people. thats when it gets selfish because youre forcing other people to witness something that could be potentially traumatising and could disturb them for the rest of their lives. Especially when it involves jumping in front of a vehicle because that driver has to live their life knowing that someone died because they hit them with whatever they were driving. personally, if someone jumped in front of my car and ended up dying i would never drive again and it would ruin my life. so yeah, thats when suicide is selfish, and this was a long answer haha

would you take a dirty picture of yourself for someone you are dating? No

what are the most embarrassing songs in your itunes library? probably glee songs

how picky are you when it comes to choosing who to kiss or not kiss? seems I'm not fussy enough from past experience :’)

do you feel that having sex anywhere but a bed is more exciting? i wouldn't know

in your opinion, is it ever okay to get back with an ex? depends on the situation and why you broke up

what’s the first animal you go to see at the zoo? Whichever is closest to the entrance. we always need a system when we go to the zoo so we see everything haha

what’s the strangest or rarest creature you’ve seen at a zoo? when i went to australia zoo there were loads of creatures i didn't even know existed and i cant remember any of the names

what animal is at a zoo that really, in your opinion, shouldn’t be? im not sure. i think as long as the animals have a good way of life, are treated right and are happy then theres no reason why they shouldn't be at the zoo. and if being there means they're protected and can help the species not to go extinct then thats awesome!

do you like zoos or aren’t you bothered? i like the a trip to the zoo :) I'm gonna love taking a foster kid to the zoo

i offer you a cigarette, you say… no, and do not smoke anywhere near me

why do you think you were put on this earth? i haven't quite figured it out yet

is it ever okay to hit a child? when is this? it is never okay to hit a child

do you think violence in video/computer games influences the nation also? Maybe slightly, i think it can de-sensitise us and make us see violence as more normal. BUT saying that, i play gta and it doesn't make me want to go round punching/shooting people so it depends on the person i guess..

are you in any shape or form, racist? No. i don't understand it at all. at the end of the day, we’re all humans no matter where were born, what our nationality is, skin colour is. It doesn't matter. A person is a person.

are you in any shape or form, sexist? again it doesn't matter what gender you are, you're still a human being

how do you think the world will end? as a christian, i believe it ends when God decides it will end.

what natural phenomenon do you find the most beautiful? Aurora borealis or however you spell it

would you kill someone who killed a child? how about YOUR child? i dont think i could ever kill someone.

what is your favorite cover of a song? pretty much everything Pentatonix does. I LOVE their cover of ‘Hallelujah'

have you ever been in love with someone who was fatally ill? neve been in love

have you ever received or given a make-over? Yup, received a few. given a few, my male best friend was the best because he let us do a photoshoot of him in full make up and i still have the pictures :’)

do you know anyone who is HIV+? not that i know of

have you ever been to a desert? no, i was supposed to go riding camels in the desert while on holiday but i got sick and spent two days stuck in the hotel in bed

do you know any trans* people? Nope

what is your favorite beatles song? let it be.. is that them? Idk

what is the poorest you have ever been? Teenage years when i got £70 to last a month but it basically all went on my gym membership and bills.

i’m sure you know of the gamer fad on youtube. who’s your favorite? dont really follow any gamers, i like watching pointless blog play sims though

is there something written on your shirt right now? nope, its a plain black shirt

what is your favorite song to play on guitar hero or rock band? i dont play either of those

where do you find the surveys you take? i follow a load of survey Tumblrs and steal ‘em of there

what’s one weird/annoying thing your pet(s) tend to do? Sit at the door and bark every time they see a squirrel. or a bird. or a shadow. Literally anything and one of them will bark, then they all start barking and having four dogs barking its an absolute headache.

what’s your favorite song by your favorite artist? oh i cant answer that, i have too many favourites.

do you have an “original character?” i dont really get the question

what about a persona/fursona? wut..?

do you ever MAKE your own surveys? nope im not very original

why’s it the woman who have to give birth anyway if the man is physically stronger in most cases? first of all, rude. secondly, its all Eve’s fault.. read the bible

do you get good internet where you live? yeah its alright most of the time

ever had a cavity? how many? Never

ever broken a tooth? Nope

what did you do on the playground at your school as a child? i liked playing make believe. me and my friend in primary school came up with our own pretend kids tv show called witches and fairies where she played a witch, i played a fairy and we had adventures :’)

are you into comics? a bit

did you ever have computer disc games you played as a kid? Sims!! Rollercoaster tycoon & zoo tycoon.

what do you think of people who have therapists? Brave. I've had a few therapists during school/college so i know how difficult it is and i gave up on therapy so i really admire people who stick with it

do you have any of those adult coloring books? i have a few, my favourite is one full of the original Alice in wonderland artwork. ALSO i found out the other day theres a fantastic beasts one and i rally want it

ever ridden an elephant? Nope

deserts: dreary or beautiful? i think they can look beautiful in pictures but i imagine they'd be dreary irl

ever seen a panda? only in pictures

what kind a camera do you have? my phone is my main camera. i do own a Sony a290 dslr that i have to buy for college but i don't use it anymore

do you have stretch marks? where? don’t be shy, they’re tiger stripes! i do, on my thighs

lobsters: cool or scary? Scary

opposoms: total vermin or cute? i dont know what they are

what tv channel dominated your childhood? Cbbc

ever actually seen a snake in the wild? dont think i have nope

have you ever had a PET snake? what kind? NO! Snakes scare me

ever had an encounter with a snapping turtle? they’re scary! i have not nope

do you like oatmeal? Nope

wherever you live, have you ever seen your national bird? does England have a national bird?!

ever had a reptile as a pet that you had to feed crickets? Nope. i would like a bearded dragon, but having to feed it live bugs freaks me out. even just the thought of having the bugs in my house i cant even

ever play hearthstone? dont know what that is..

ever gone hunting? biggest thing you’ve ever shot? No. and I'm disgusted by people who do hunt

how about fishing? biggest thing you’ve ever caught? i used to fish with my grandad when i was a kid, but i only ever caught small ones

coolest place you’ve ever been fishing? Idk I've only ever been to lakes on camp sites

which is cooler: african or asian elephant? i didn't know there was a difference

craziest thing you’ve ever eaten? i dont eat crazy stuff, I'm too scared of eating crazy stuff

what’s in a camel’s back? Idk ask the camel

steve irwin: foolish for messing around with animals or brave for teaching us? Brave. i love Steve irwin, i think he did great work and its a shame he died. I've been to his zoo in australia and I’ve never seen happier animals in a zoo. we spent at least half an hour watching the tigers play in the water with the zoo keepers and you could tell there was a genuine love between them.

what do you think of people who put their whole life on social media? If thats what they want to do then fine.

don’t you think it’s a bit deceptive to wear a push-up bra? nope. if wearing a push up bra makes you feel better about yourself and gives you confidence then you do it!

do you truly believe we came from chimps? No

well, what do you think of extra bones and even organs in our bodies? why do we have them? Idk

if you could choose anyone to be your father, who would it be? my dad

weirdest video game you’ve ever played? i dont think I've played any weird games tbh

we’re having a pig-pickin’! whatcha eating? a what?

ever been on a scary hay ride? no I'm a chicken

ever been to a castle? Yuppie live like half an hour away from Warwick castle so I've been there a lot in my life

what’s your favorite kind of penguin? rockhopper- we had to make penguin masks in college for one of the shows the actors were doing so i made a mask of a rockhopper penguin

whales. should they be allowed in sea world? if they're treated right then yeah

ever seen an albino? whether it be human or animal? yeah there was someone in my school who was albino

what do you think of the song “miss jackson” by panic! at the disco? Don't think I've heard it

what is the wallpaper on your best friends cell phone? it used to be a picture of me and him but i don't know if he's changed it

do you feel comfortable singing in front of others? No

do you like using big words when you talk? No I tend to say words wrong and make a fool of myself

do you EVER use caps lock? Rarely. i cant read things very well if they're written in capitals

are you loud when you’re having sex? Doubt it

have you ever wanted to drop out of school? yes, i hated school but in England you're not allowed to just drop out

when was the last time you watched south park? dont think I've ever watched it

are you italian? nope

are you interested in photography at all? Yes i enjoy taking photos and used to be super into it but when i studied it in college i had such an awful time it kinda ruined it

any survey takers that annoy you on tumblr? nope

do you like bob marley? hes alright, I've not really listened to his music much so i don't really have an opinion

can you talk to your parents about anything without them judging or bickering at you? my mom, pretty much yeah. dad, not so much.

are you interested in art? a bit, not a lot though

don’t you think we’re spending too much money on exploring the mere theory of climate change? no i think were not spending enough. we should all be way more concerned with global warming than we are

everyone always wants to know your favorite animal. what’s your SECOND favorite? i dont have a first favourite so i cant have a second favourite. i just have a big list of favourites

who’s your favorite disney character? again, i don't have a favourite there are too many. i tend to like the sidekicks in the movies more than the main characters like Sven & Olaf from frozen, Pascal & Maximus from Tangled etc

have you ever taken the eharmony personality quiz? Nope

do you take vitamins? if so, what kinds? Vitamin C

how much was your prom dress? what’s the most you’d spend? my prom dress wasn't very expensive, I can't remember exactly how much it was. I still have it in my wardrobe but I don't like it

would you marry someone of a different religion? Possibly, if i loved them enough. and if they understood i wouldn't change my religion

how did you learn the word “fuck”? probably at school

if you could make one of your enemies your best friend, who would it be? i dont have enemies so idk

what is the last movie you saw in theaters? Passengers

have you ever got into a wreck? not a serious one nope

do you think you are an argumentative person? Not really, unless its something I'm passionate about or if I'm hurt by something

can you admit when you’re wrong? Yeah

are you easily confused? very :’)

do you think you would make a good wife/husband? i think i would

have you ever caught a butterfly? not on purpose.

have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk? nope i dont drink so i wouldn't try make anyone else

do you like being kissed on the neck? no, it feels gross

favorite song by the band the offspring? never heard of them

how many times each morning do you press the snooze button? i dont set an alarm often and when i do i don't press snooze

when you go out to eat, what sides do your order with your food? normally fries

what video game or computer game are you best at? sims

how do you normally come across new music? listening to the radio, or when ads or videos use a song i like the sound of i find out what it is

what subject in school do you feel is the least necessary? English, I've never had to analyse a book or poem in my life since leaving school

do you enjoy power outages or do you get annoyed? no they're annoying

are you pretty politically correct? idk probably

have you ever behaved like a stalker? probably online yeah :’)

do you appreciate other people’s opinions? depends what its about

if you could pick your own pet name, what would it be? pet name for myself or for an actual pet..? I've already decided when i get my own dog i want to call it moose

do you care what’s going on in the world? i care, but i don't make an effort to find out cause its usually all depressing stuff

how many partners is too many? at one time or like in a lifetime..? lifetime it doesn't matter but if you have more than one parter at once then thats too many

do you examine the tissue after you blow your nose? nope

do you prefer boys to shave down there? Idk

how much does your mother know about your sex life (or lack thereof)? she knows its non existent

are any of your siblings married? what are their spouse’s names? Nope ut she lived with her partner Tom

have you ever had a pet bird? Yeah, we used to own to cockatoos called bobby and beauty

how many times have you moved in your lifetime? 2

if you could get one piercing and one tattoo, where would you want them? dont want any piecrings. i have a tattoo already but i want another one on my ankle/foot of a lighthouse

would you consider yourself to be adventurous? Nope

has any part of your house ever been flooded? dont think so

is there anyone that you’re worried about right now? who and why? our foster baby, he's two weeks old tomorrow but he's still in hospital with drug withdrawals so he cant come home yet

if you won a lot of money, would you donate any of it? to what organization would you donate it? I would donate to dogs home or a mental health charity

describe the best friend you’ve ever had, or the best person you’ve ever known. I cab right now

have you ever adopted a stray animal? We've adopted a few dogs in my lifetime but none recently

what time did you wake up this morning? about 9am

ever wonder if you’re someone’s everything? yeah, i cant see anyone getting to know me and being like ‘shes perfect for me’ like srsly I'm too much of a mess

would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde? not platinum nope

what is your mom’s middle name? Anne

do you know the color of your ex boyfriend/girlfriend’s eyes? n/a

have you had your wisdom teeth out? Nope

your appendix? yeah, mine burst when i was two years old and tried to kill me haha

#survey #long

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