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#WHYYYYYYY DID HE DO THAT
wewontbesleeping · 1 year
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guys llewyn peed on Alice I have never been so upset in my LIFE
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mariejordans · 6 months
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as soon as i saw rufus approach sam i knew it was joever for him
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chippendyke · 29 days
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Chairface faking his death every other week just to stay relevant and everyone falls for it every single time except like idk Arthur and American Maid maybe
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purple-possibilities · 7 months
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tfw you unintentionally spoil yourself bc you can’t wait to read the fanfiction
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garoujo · 1 year
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SUCCESS !!!! this man has just swallowed every single mora i have i’m gonna cry </3
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coconut530 · 5 months
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EGG 💙💀🙌🏼🥺❤️
#Solid State#Solid State Webtoon#Webtoon#WOW ANOTHER GLORIOUS CHAPTER COMPLETED THAT WAS AMAZING#EVEN TWO EPS SHORTER IT DELIVERED EVEN MORE LIKE WOW#ANYWAY THE CHAPTER UHHHH NO CYBORG DON’T KILL EGG PLZZZZZZZ#THE BLOOD ON ITS HANDS AAAAAAAAAA#GOOD JOB ENZO I WASN’T SURE IF YOU’D GET UR KNIFE BACK BUT GOOD#YES ICO GO SAVE EGG IT DON’T MATTER WHAT THE WORKERS ARE TELLING YOU#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA STOP CHOKING EGG PLZ RIGHT NOW I SWEAR#LOOK AT HOW SAD HE LOOKS WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO HIMMMM#THANKS FOR SAVING HIM ENZO#THOSE PANELS OF EGAN TELLING HIMSELF TO RUN ARE SO GOOD WITH THE COLORS AND EXPRESSIONS LIKE GAHHH#“You! Strange Unsettling Man what did you do with Egg?” HAHAHA ENZO IS STRANGE UNSETTLING MAN HA#OPEN THE GATES AND STAB THAT THING IN THE EYE LET’S GO EGG! SO PROUD OF YOU!#Oof Enzo you good buddy#A HAPPY ENDING TO A CHAPTER FOR ONCE OMG NOT LIKE THE DEVASTATION OF TAKEOVER AND THE GRIEF OF SURGE YAYYYY#WOW THEY KEEP MALFUNCTIONING I WONDER WHYYYYYYY Did Surge doctor man even come back to work#The colors of the lower city in the rain I can’t! Look at those purples and blues!!!#THOMMO AND BEAU! SO GLAD THEY’RE GOOD FRIENDS OMG#ICOOOOOOO BBY HIIIII#THAT ENDING SHOT IS SO WHOLESOME IT LOOKS LIKE THE VIDEO GAME STRAY#BUBBLY TITLE ART AGAIN CHAPTER WAS SO GOOD THANKS SO MUCH PANELPERDAY AND VELDENMIRE LOOKING SO VERY FORWARD TO THE MIDSEASON FINALE#AND THE REST OF THE SEASON AT LARGE!#Also expect another post compiling details again next week bc there’s STILL STUFF I MISSED GAH#It’ll be redundant with the other one bc I didn’t know we were at this natural ending point then and I wanna just compile everything#So yeah see y’all next week for the MIDSEASON FINALE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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dennisboobs · 1 year
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yeah i still hate the gang gets new wheels with a burning passion
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blkwag · 1 year
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we need voice notes omg
#but im still a little ticked about something from yesterday#so we’re getting closer to the season starting and i’ve been posting on our socials ummm the players for the 2023 season#and I started with returning players bc that’s was me and m established like months ago#so m is a player and he’s returning but he was the last returning player i was gonna post#and a couple weeks ago maybe last week d (the guy who used to run the socials which he still has access to) texted me and asked if i was#gonna make a post that day (it was a tues) and i was like no. cause I do them M W F#so he was like good cause i want m to be the last player announced and i was like yeah. he will be the last RETURNING player announced#KEEP THAT IN MIND YALL. LAST RETURNING PLAYER ANNOUNCED#so why did i make m’s post yesterday and in the caption even said something like for our LAST RETURNING PLAYER and i announced m#WHYYYYYYY DID d text me something like ‘shay it’s done but i wanted m to be the last player.’ bc he didn’t want his old team who happens to#be a rival to know he was still playing here which where tf else would he go at this point like if he was gonna go back to them or anywhere#else he wouldn’t be here???#then he added a smile emoji and like said it’s no big deal. then why tf did you send the message#so i was like 🤨😐 sorry. i didn’t know he wanted m to be that last player announced but if you followed me you would know that i specifically#posted about the returning players. so why tf would i post m at the very end.#why would i post about the returning players. then go into new signings and be like oh wait here’s our last player who is a returning player#that should’ve been posted three weeks ago 😐#what sense would that make#but i was like whatever man#literally m and c were like. it’s not a big deal#and they tell me all the time to take what d says with a grain of salt and to not take it to heart#bc at the end of the day. he’s still not in the office physically#so he literally doesn’t know what convos were having and what we’re talking about and planning on the office#apparently he comes in tomorrow which 🙂#it’s fine. but he better not fawking pile a bunch of shit on me#luckily i have m and c around so they probably won’t let that happen
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wewontbesleeping · 1 year
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will this do a thing to change her? am I leaving dawn in danger?
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pika-blur · 1 year
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lemres out here tryin to get me killed alksdjkasdj
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snoopynatural · 2 years
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oh so i'm just never gonna be able to see harry styles live again. alright
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certifiedhitmaker · 8 months
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Pro Football player Shidou x Spoiled Reader! He's kindaa mean, just a lil bit, like a teeny bit.
He treats you so well, shopping sprees, gets your hair and nails done whenever you ask him, always takes you out on dates. He always gives you his card to go shopping on your own though because he'll be damned if you have him walking around with 1000 bags in his hands. He'll always suggest you get pink acrylics and pink toes, maybe white if he feels like switching it up.
But the one time he tells you no, you get all pissy with him and start acting like a brat, which he definitely aint gon tolerate.
"But whyyyyyyy!?" You whine, following him around the house. "Since when did you start telling me no?" "Since now." He grunts out, paying your whines and attitude no mind. He had been spoiling you a little too much lately and you had been running with it. Every single day of the week you wanted to go out and buy something or go somewhere, it was draining, because you always dragged him with you, that poor man needed a break. "If you don't love me then just say that." You continue to whine and follow him around. Normally, he would've just given in and let you go do whatever it is you wanna do just to shut you up and get you out his ear but not this time. You were gonna feel it this time. All he does is sigh through his nose in response to you, heading to the bedroom and laying on top of the covers on his back.
"Wowwwww so you really don't love me?" You question him offendedly. "Shut up." He grumbles, clearly getting fed up with you. "Shut up? Who the fuck are you talking to Ryusei?" "Talking to you." "You must wanna get fucked up." All he does is scoff in response. So, in retaliation, you snatch the pillow out from under his head and hit him in the face with it. "Get up, I'm talking to you." and he does, sneering down at you, his pink eyes fixed on yours, you just pissed him clean off.
Before you could even think to apologize, he had you bent over on the bed, pushing your head into the mattress. "Arch your back." All you can do is comply and whimper at him. "You wanna act like a fuckin brat, I'll fuck you like one then." He pulls your panties down from under your dress, grabbing your hips and pressing himself against you. "I don't know why you thought you were going out in this skimpy ass dress anyway, don't wear this again." He says, sliding it up your hips and bunching it up at your waist. "It's not skimpy." You retort. "Did I ask you to speak?" You didn't respond to him, knowing better than to test him right now. He pulls his dick out, slowly stroking himself, getting himself fully hard. "Already fucking wet." He grunts, pressing the tip against your entrance. "Ryu I'm sorry." You whine. "Shut up."
He pushes himself inside, making you whimper at the stretch. He immediately starts thrusting into you at an animalistic pace, each thrust jerking you forward and causing your ass to slap against his pelvis. It was too much. "R-Ryu, slower baby!" he ignored your plea, continuing to thrust at that same pace. He didn't care if you could take it or not, he wasn't focused on you right now. He cared about getting his own orgasm. He paid you no mind, grunting and letting out breathy moans at the feeling of being inside you. "Ryu! Please! It's too much! I can't!" You continue whining. He grunts in response, slowing down his pace.
"Oh, it's too much for you?" he says, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you up so you're flush against him. He continues his animalistic pace, causing your back to arch away from him. He slides his hand to your throat, the other still placed on your hip as he thrusts up into you. Choked moans and sobs escaping your lips consecutively as fresh hot tears fall down your face. The wet squelching sounds getting louder and louder as he fucks you dumb. little breathy "ah" sounds falling from your lips in time with the sound of your skin slapping against his. "Fuck." He pants out, his dick twitching and his hips stuttering, he's close. His thrusts get sloppy, but never lose their strength, continuing to move your whole body as he fucks into you. He lets out one last groan, holding you in place as he cums inside you. After stilling both your movements for what seems like an eternity, he pulls out, letting your shaking body fall on the bed. "Clean me up."
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mesperyiandevotee · 3 months
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🏴magictrioinitiate-deactivated
Reblog if your name isn't Alfred F Jones.
🃏thekinglovesplayingwithmyballs follow
WE'LL FIND YOU JONES
🐺a-squared-omegaverse follow
As if he couldn't just lie, if he even is on this hellsite.
🏴magictrioinitiate-deactivated
He wouldn't cuz heroes don't lie.
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🏴notafjonesprommy-deactivated
A hero would lie to protect his secret identity ;)
🎻sayakamikideservedbetter follow
THIS IS THE POST! ON MY DASH! I FEEL LIKE I'M SEEING A CELEBRITY!!
🗿givemegumgumdumdum follow
NO NOTES???????????????
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🦪clamoutjamout follow
so i got like really hella drunk last night and out of what must have been a mix of desperation and hubris, I sent an email to Mr. Romano, askiNG FOR AN INTERVIEW OVER ZOOM TO ASK QUESTIONS FOR RESEARCH FOR MY HISTORICAL EROTICA WIP AND HE SAID YES???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!
🍖hannibalservedmemyownballs follow
Doesn't he like never talk to historians and w/e? Holy shit what kind of magical persuasive powers did your drinks give you and can you send me some?
🦖little-arms-big-hugs follow
I wouldn't say *never*. He's given interviews before, he just has a really low tolerance for disrespect compared to his brother. But with his temper I wouldn't be surprised if his gov asked him to not accept as many interviews anymore.
🍖hannibalservedmemyownballs follow
True, true. I still want to borrow some of OP's persuasion magical drinks.
🦪clamoutjamout follow
my mom sent me a bottle of that liquor mr Latvia made and i didnt look at the proof before drinking like half the bottle (mixed with pop).
also... I finally pulled up my big girl panties and read what I wrote to mr. romano...............
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... im going to kms.
🦖little-arms-big-hugs follow
Forget persuasion powers, I want whatever healing magic you have that drinking half of MR. LATVIA'S balsam didn't kill you!
🦪clamoutjamout follow
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#we're almost there folx! #RIP OP #nation person mention #alcohol mention
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🌄cabininthewoodscore follow
UM. HELLO????
🤠redbreadrebellion follow
Yeah, Ch*rchill pushed hard for those two to get together, it's no secret. What about it? It doesn't mean they actually got together turn off your shipping brain.
🏴tw1stedm1nd-deactivated
Sure and America definitely didn't talk about it in an interview
🌄cabininthewoodscore follow
😭😭😭😭😭 The link just goes to a 404 page NNNNOOOOOOOO WHYYYYYYY
#usuk ship real is the only conspiracy theory i'll believe
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🐸enby-froggy follow
did anyone else see h/bomber/guy's new video??? PLEASE someone put that man in witness protection or something before K*rkland gets him
🍝spaghetti-breaker follow
wasn't he originally supposed to talk about that one bbc pirate show?
🐸enby-froggy follow
spaghetti-breaker He was but he ended up going off-track after he found some reddit post that led him down a rabbit hole of research. tl;dr: K*irkland yo-hoe-hoeing isn't just a meme
🦐butisbugsshrimp follow
I'm more worried about dickland's teaboo white knights getting him tbh
🍯kidsishrunkthehoney follow
Lmao looks like he saw it!
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#wait a min i gotta search something #THE VIDEO IS ALMOST 3 HOURS WTF #now i gotta watch
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🪃callmyanxietyboomerang follow
dylan's collab with mr canada was just them trying to out-do each other with all the gay jokes sjflsfjsifhsifjsij someone make one of those 10 hour videos with just the cuts of that please? 🙏🏼
🪃callmyanxietyboomerang follow
SOMEONE DID FUCK YEAH!!!
#canada nation person #vintage baker man #someone send me the video i refuse to download tiktok
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🎲dev1ld1c3 follow
If we try hard enough, do you guys think we can convince Mr. Denmark to do a girl month donation goal?
🛸area51searchandrescue follow
Tbh I'm surprised he doesn't have a subscription goal like that already
🔦berwaldsfleshlight follow
There's a rumour he's trying to convince Jones and Beilschmidt to do it with him first before he makes the goal official
#pretty sure those two dont need convincing
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the-fluff-piece · 10 months
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Sanji - loving his s/o with self esteem issues
this is part of the request for a headcanon from @zephyrian-journ it turned into a whole story, whoops i hope it's okay!
Sanji x fem!reader who has problems with her body, I can only write from my perspective so keep that in mind!
Mention of stress response, insecurity with one's own body, mention of restricting
Here are my Masterlists
My Masterlist - Short and Multichapter stories
Headcanon Masterlist
Sanji expresses his love through food and service, he is just like that. So when you stop eating his creations and request only the plainest, low caloric options he is starting to feel really anxious. When you refuse to be touched and hide your body from the world he starts to panic. When you become absent minded and cautious, when you retreat and keep to yourself - he has a full breakdown.
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He waits until you are alone and approaches you with an uncomfortable expression.
"So, what's wrong?" He asks, avoiding your gaze.
"What do you mean?" You ask back.
"You're kind of distant lately and...did I do something wrong?" The gaze of his blue eyes is locked on his shoes, his graceful fingers are fumbling nervously, he looks like a boy that has done something seriously wrong.
"No, not at all" you try to look into his eyes, but he turns away.
"I understand." He runs away. When you catch his arm and he turns around, tears are already flowing from his face. "I understand, I am not good enough for you anymore, I won't bother you anymore with my presence" the end of his sentence is hardly understandable, since he is sobbing loudly now, sinking to his knees. "You don't love me anymore, I am not good enough" he cries as he dramatically hugs your knees.
"Shh, don't cry babe, I love you more than anything, you know that" you tell him as you soothingly stroke his hair and kiss the tears away. "Why would you think that I don't love you anymore? You're the best thing that ever happened to me" you tell him as he looks up at you with puppy eyes, pressing his cheek against your chest.
"You're not eating my cakes anymore, you don't let me touch you, we're not bathing together anymore...it's like you don't want to be with me anymoooooooooooooore" the last word transitions into a long, whiny sob and he cries like a waterfall again.
"It's got nothing to do with you!" You explain to him. "You're perfect, you know that. It's me."
He blinks tears out of his eyes and looks at you. "THAN WHYYYYYYY" he helplessly gestures with his hands as he's crying out his question.
"...I gained weight. I don't fit into my jeans anymore. I just...I feel like a whale. I don't feel comfortable right now. I didn't want you to notice until I lost it again. Which doesn't seem to be working. And I was never thin to begin with..." your voice breaks as you struggle to express all you are feeling. "I just didn't want to disappoint you." Now you have tears in your eyes, avoiding his puzzled look.
"What?" He gets up and holds your shoulders. "How would you disappoint me?" He tries to catch your gaze but you are avoiding him.
"You like pretty women. I don't even know what you see in me, and now it's gotten worse. I just didn't want you to notice"
It is harder to say than you thought and now you're sobbing. Suddenly you're pressed against his chest, the soft fabric of Sanjis suit is catching your tears.
"I was so stupid and superficial I even manage to hurt you now with it! I'm so sorry! I didn't know what I even could expect from a relationship. I just know that you are unique and perfect and that I feel as safe with you as never before. I like your body because it is yours, and I want to see it grow old together with mine." he lifts your chin up and looks into your eyes. He looks dead serious now, despite his reddened and puffy eyes.
"Please forgive me!" He pleads. "I don't want you to feel unwanted! What can I do?"
"I don't know..." you say.
He nods, tears and snot running down his face.
"I'll find a way!" He promises.
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For the next days, he's serious and quiet. Every time you talk, he tells you how much he loves you, but things between you seem tense. He also seems to do a lot more stuff for Nami than usual - carrying stuff for her, bringing her more treats, constantly asking what he could do. All in all, a strange situation. Tension builds and you are even more insecure about him than before, painfully aware that he was into Nami way before you two met.
So when you see them vanish in Nami's room, you cannot help but get a bad feeling. When they don't come out for quite a while, you decide to have a look. Nothing unusual to just knock and see what they're up to.
You knock - no answer. You try the handle, it's open. You enter and see them standing in the room, heads together. It's hard to see exactly what's happening there, but Sanji immediately jumps up, looking guilty.
"Y/n! What are you doing here? You weren't supposed to see this!" He shouts angrily. He has never used this kind of tone with you. After the last days, it's enough. You turn on your heel and try to get away before anyone is seeing you cry.
You're already halfway across the ship when you hear him behind you: "wait, It's not what it looks like!"
He quickly catches up and blocks your way.
"It wasn't supposed to go like this, don't cry" he says, but you're already crying.
"Leave me alone" you tell him.
"No, I'll never leave alone again" he says, his voice suddenly quiet and soft. Through the veil of your tears, you see him go down on one knee.
"I'll never leave you, because I want you to become my wife!" He's shouting, for everyone to hear, as he holds up a golden ring encrusted with diamonds.
"I got this ring from Nami's treasure, I hope you like it. If not I'll get another one!" He looks at you, awaiting your answer.
This was the last thing you expected. The two of you never talked about marriage.
"What?" You ask, overwhelmed by everything.
"I want to share everything with you for the rest of my life. I want to grow old with you! I want to become better for you all the time. I want you to become my family, because I love you so much! I told you I will find a way to show you how much you mean to me. This is it. Please marry me!"
For a painful second, you hesitate and his lower lip already begins to tremble. You hold out your hand and let him slip the ring on your finger. He kisses your hand and holds it against his cheek. You can feel a tear running down his face.
"You make me so happy" he cries. "Let's be a family!"
______________________________
Soooo....this one took me *checks date* forever, I am so sorry! I will be working through my drafts and requests as I have a bit more time now! Hope you liked it :D
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missamyrisa2 · 24 days
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15 questions for 15 friends:
Thanks for thinking of me for these questions, @lady-featherquill ~ this is like mmmmh a certain kind of tingle blushhh tickle for me to be called on~
Were you named after anyone?: Yess I was named after Burl Ives, but you wouldn't know it because I spell and pronounce my name differently~
When was the last time you cried?: I made the mistake of thinking about The Lion King a few hours ago~
Do you have kids?: I make kids all the time. Like crying over the lion king because I randomly was thinking about how real to life the animation was of Simba pulling on Mufasa's ear and holygodddddd he was trying to wake his dad up whyyyyyyy are animators so supremely great at heartsqueezing~~~ I'm just kidding. That was a kid.
What sports do you play/have you played?: all of them I think~ I live by the fake it until you make it mindset and I'm still figuring out the latter part of that. But I did study pickleball thoroughly under its venerable founder, The Earl of Pickle
Do you use sarcasm?: William Shakesman said that's the lowest form of brevity so I try to avoid it whenever possible, also I'm horrendously bad at it to where I sound completely sincere and this has resulted in one too many punches to the face because, surprisingly if you poorly sarcastically announce you'd really love to be just hit in the face there are a LOT of people who are all too eager to jump in~
What is the first thing you notice about people?: That they're always trying to figure out if I hate them because I had a fairly consistent RBF crossed with an inclination to be mysterious. Through online interactions I first take note of their comma frequency because that says so much about a person's Oxford-related preferences.
What's your eye color?: Blue or green or grey depending which type of light you shove in my face, followed by whatever my eyelid is because moonlight makes me squint
Scary movies or happy endings?: I like the ones where nothing is really resolved and the story just sort of stops because everyone gave up and it was probably lunchtime so f*ck it~
Any talents?: I can do a hair flip like nobody's business, which is to say no one should ever be in the business of doing such hair flips because I've knocked over more cups and hit my head on more things than anyone should do in five lifetimes.
Where were you born?: I'm fairly certain I've always been, because whenever I attempt to find the record of my birth Mr. Tumnus plays an enchanting tune and I wake up in a cold room.
What are your hobbies?: arguing on the Internet and street corners why Fullmetal Alchemist 2003 is better than Brotherhood. I took up the hobby after some guy stole my bicycle which was an outrage, but that was his hobby and he imparted the wisdom which set me on my path which is that a hobby is something that makes you completely miserable and spreads that misery onto anyone unfortunate enough to share your space.
Do you have any pets?: No, no one ever wants to pet me and it's probably because of the below answer
How tall are you?: 6'2
Favorite subject in school?: History. Not so much for the subject matter but because memorizing facts comes obscenely easy to me and I loved writing excessively lengthy essays which went nowhere and were loaded with as many funny words as I could muster like trying to relate an unrelated event to the future of filibustering.
Dream job?: Tending a lighthouse so I could make giant shadowpuppets over the water and make alligator mouths eat the ships.
Join in and pass it on if you can. Don't feel obligated!
@witchy-giggles @atomiccollectorwitch @crystalstarlight4657 @opossumgirltongue @adventuresofmelody @greenticklerdreams @juviisworld @dusktexanler @polsj103 @fuzzypilled @androgynousangeldreamland @daisylovestickles @yourgothgfswitch @magicaltickles @giggliestgirl
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