Tumgik
#college!conrad fisher
tatoda · 9 months
Text
Mine || conrad fisher x fem!reader
Tumblr media
!!MINORS DNI!!
masterlist
request
summary: attending the same college as your best friend has its highs and lows, but conrad sees you flirting with another dude he finally does something about his feelings
pairing: conrad fisher x fem!reader
warning: slight angst, male receive, jealous conrad CHARACTERS ARE 18
wc: 1.1k
im a little rusty on my smut writing I apologize I'm trying to get back into it still. edited but I may have missed stuff
Tumblr media
You and conrad grew up together as the oldest siblings, you to your brother and sister, steven and belly, and conrad to his brother jeremiah. Your birthdays was just a day apart from conrad’s. To say that your mothers were so excited to have babies around the same time was an understatement. They were best friends and it was their dream to have kids at the same time. Also as mothers, they knew you were both meant for each other. To be the first two little kids to run around the beach house, to attending your dream college together.
At the end of the summer before college started in the fall is when conrad broke your heart. It was the 4th of july and Jeremiah dragged everyone out of the house to go to nicole’s party. You hung out with Belly most of the night not trusting the drunk guys around her. With your mind occupied with her most of the night, you never got to talk to conrad. You wanted to watch the fireworks with him and not come to this lame party, you wanted to kiss him and tell him how you felt about him after all these years. Belly took off with nicole letting you have your fun. Who knew that fun could be ruined in 2.5 seconds? You walked into the living room looking for the brown-haired boy only spotting him with a girl on his lap and her eating his face out with him doing the same thing.
You ended up leaving the party and cousins that night. Telling your mom that you needed to finish a ton of college stuff before moving in at the end of the month. She didn’t push to ask you what happened and let you leave knowing you would call if it was anything serious. When everyone arrived back home that night conrad looked for you. He wanted to talk to you about your midnight plans to go watch the fireworks, but everywhere he looked you were gone. He looked in your bedroom seeing the nicely made bed and your bags gone. He sat on the edge of the mattress looking around softly.
“she left.” laurel walked into the room slowly
“where did she go? everything was fine before the party.” he stood up walking around your room and to the picture of you and him as babies. laurel walked behind him placing her hands on each side of his arms
“two peas in a pod, you two are inseparable.” laurel paused “she went home to finish college stuff.”
“and she didn’t ask me to go with her?” he brought a hand to rub over his face and sighed in defeat.
You didn’t talk to conrad the rest of the summer. He texted you, but you decided you better not get your heart broken again.
It was a few weeks into the school year. Your roommate dragged you out to another party that you didn’t want to attend, only because conrad would be there and almost every time he didn’t see you but you saw him. And you saw the girls he would leave with. And it just broke your heart more. So here you were trying to distract yourself with Josh— a boy from your math class— as he talked to you about his frat. You acted as if you cared only trying to hook up with him in the end.
“yeah my dad wanted me to follow him in his footsteps so he decided to pay for my school year.” he bragged taking a sip of his drink
“wow.” you acted interested
“if you want, one day i can take you for a ride on my boat back home?” he leaned towards you as if it was a secret
“i’d love that, yeah.” you put a hand on his arm rubbing it a little before a shadow crept over the both of you, it was conrad.
“sorry to bother, i need to talk to her,” he grumbled in josh’s face
“can it wait? i’m talking to her?” he tried to protest and you didn’t look at conrad, it would only make you fall and say you’re sorry for everything
“no it can’t.” he grabbed your hand off the dudes arm and walked you to an empty room before shutting the door “what the hell are you thinking!” he moved around you and away from the door
“i don’t know.” you shrugged slowly lifting your gaze to him, he was wearing a white shirt, plaid pullover, and jeans, you had never seen the boys other than in the summer and it was nice to see conrad dressed in jeans
“he was practically fucking you with his eyes!” he stood in front of you now
“grow up conrad, we’re in college now.” you scoffed. putting your drink down on a nearby dresser
“yeah, and it’s my job you don’t get an std from a frat boy like him.”
“oh and you’re any different?” it slipped out of your mouth
“what’s that supposed to mean?” he was taken back by your comment
“i’ve seen the girls you take back to your dorm. how do you know they aren’t carrying anything harmful when you stick your dick inside of them!”
“y/n what the fuck are you talking about?” his eyebrows furrowed
“the girls.”
“what girls! not one has stepped into my dorm other than our damn family when we moved in!”
“b-but you take girls home.” you tried to make yourself believe it
“i walk them back to their dorm. they are a drunk mess and my mom raised me that way, you should know.” his voice softly said
“i-“
“i’ve only had my eyes set on you since we were kids.” he blurted
“w-what?”
“yeah but i wanted to give you space to figure out your college life, but not get dicked down by a frat boy at one party.” he smiled to himself
“i’m sorry, okay? i’m sorry i didn’t see it earlier.”
“i tried for years, for you to see how i feel.”
“i felt the same way, i was going to tell you at cousin’s, but then i saw you with this girl at nicole’s party and she was all over you so i just left.”
“the party? is that why you left cousins early?” you nodded looking back down at the floor
“i was heartbroken con. you were making out with her what was i supposed to feel?”
“i don’t know you should have talked to me.”
“i talked to jere and he said that it wasn’t worth it, so i just left to get a head start to move in.”
“that’s why you were so distant when college started? we were so excited to be going to the same place, my mom was excited!”
“i felt heartbroken and i didn’t know what to do you’re the only boy i’ve ever loved, i didn’t know how to work around it!”
“i kissed the girl at nicole’s party because jeremiah told me you went on a date,” he whispered
“i-i hung out with a dude at the arcade for 10 minutes trying to help in figuring out a game. jeremiah was there!” you tan your fingers through your hair
“well, how was i supposed to know!”
“it seems like jere is just against us.” conrad laughed softly
“he’s always had something for you, you know.” you nodded knowing how the other fisher boy liked you, but you only had eyes for conrad
“he doesn’t matter. i’ve only seen him as a friend.” conrad let out a soft breath
“come here.” he gestured at you and you walked towards him as he opened his arms for you. the comfort of his arms secured you leaned against his chest hearing the raging of his heartbeat
“your heart is going crazy.” you twisted your head to look up at him with your chin on his chest and conrad looking down at you
“because of you.” he brought a hand to the side of your face and leaned in to kiss you, for the first time. conrad fisher was kissing you, it felt like a dream
He held your face so softy. He didn’t wanna break you, not again. His arms tightened around you pulling him closer to you. The kiss became deeper and stronger than you have ever had before with anyone. That’s when you felt the effect you had on him, he was hard, from you. You didn’t know you could do that to anyone ever but it felt amazing and an accomplishment.
“sorry.” he smiled against your lips as you both slowly separated lips turning red
“don’t be.” bringing one of your hands to his hair moving a few pieces away from his eyes the other hand you had slowly descended towards his pants
“y/n” a warning tone came out of his mouth
“hm?” you looked at him innocence in your eyes as if your hand wasn’t messing with the button of his jeans before moving to the zipper
“no one’s ever-“ his breath hitched as your hand cupped his erection “no one ever touched me down there.” you looked at him confused
“you’ve had sex though?” he nodded
“that doesn’t mean foreplay was involved, they just skip to the sex.” you kissed his lips
“don’t worry, just sit down and relax.” you pushed him to sit on the bed
Dragging down his jeans he lifted your hips to help get the fabrics down to his calf’s. He looked scared and nervous. You were touching him, the girl he’s been in love with forever, finally seeing the effect she has on him. You slowly swiped to get some pre cum off of the head and conrad shuttered under your touch.
“like that?”
“fuck, you have no idea.”
You coated the sides of his dick before slowly moving up and down at the right movement. He looked down at you breathing hard and deadly to your touch. A loud clatter came from outside the room and his eyes turned to worry.
“y/n, i don’t think this is such a good place to do thi-“ you cut him off licking the side of his shaft shutting him up immediately and the sounds from outside passed “fuck” he brought a hand to your head holding it as you bobbed up and down on him “keep going.” you didn’t plan on stopping, you hollowed your cheeks taking him in deeper and his groans filled the room
The way you moved made him jealous of the guys who have seen this image before. You on your knees sucking him off like no tomorrow. But the thought disappeared as soon as it came because he realized that this will be his view for the rest of his life. You looked up at him making eye contact and he felt the warm build but he didn’t wanna release just yet.
“just a few more, yeah.” he started to take control by moving your head with his hips as they came up off of the bed making you gag “just-“ he moved faster feeling the edge start. he pumped all the way into your mouth and let his release into your mouth as he groaned into the air
“fuck.” you pulled off of him and swallows the salty taste “did you just-“ he couldn’t believe you were real
“is that bad?”
“no, no, god no.” he moved your hair from your face. “all i know is no man is ever touching you again, you’re mine.”
1K notes · View notes
v1olentdelights · 6 months
Text
On The Nights You Can't Sleep
Tumblr media
Conrad Fisher x sister!reader TW: Nothing Summary: On the nights you couldn't sleep, Conrad would always be there for you. a/n: this was requested from a wonderful anon, I really hope they like this, and you too! Let me know what you think!
It had been one of the first nights you all had been in the same house again, Conrad having come home for fall break. Everyone had retired to their bedrooms after dinner. It seemed that they had all gone to sleep, or at least Jeremiah had; you could hear his snores from his room across the hall. Yet you found yourself wide awake but you were unsure of why. So you decided to head downstairs for a bit, maybe different scenery would help you. Unbeknownst to you, Jeremiah and Susannah had been the only one’s asleep.
Making your way down the stairs, you make sure to avoid the squeaky stair, the second to last step before the ground floor. Pulling out one of those cozy blankets Laurel gets you every Christmas you turn on the tv and crowd yourself with pillows. There is no noise in the house and it seems almost like you are playing a part in a movie.
“What are you doing up, bug?” You whip your head around to see Conrad looking down at you in his lighthouse patterned pajama pants and Stanford sweatshirt. 
“I just can’t sleep, it’ll pass.” You give him a small smile in hopes that he just passes it off. But a small part of you is begging him to stay, just like he used to. It quickly died as you watched him make his way over to the kitchen, away from you. The quiet patter of his feet and the sound of the fridge opening is familiar, and it brings a faint smile to your face. He’s beside you once again, though this time he is taking a seat beside you as he holds out a cup of milk for you to take. 
“It helped when you were younger.” You didn’t reach out to take it, because you had neglected to tell him for years that you didn’t like milk, but he always got it for you. 
The tired look in his eyes had you giving in just like you used to. But as you suspected, not only did it make you want to spit it up, it also did not help tire you. At this point he had reclined into the couch watching whatever was playing on the tv. Setting the glass down, you moved closer to him and rested your head on his shoulder. He moved his arm to hold you across your shoulder. 
“Still not tired?” you shook your head. Sitting up slightly, Conrad drags you wrapped up in your blanket with him out the front door. Unlocking and opening the passenger side door for you he then gets in on his side. He turns on the heat and some instrumental Taylor Swift music clicks on, he must have been listening to it as he was driving down. You leaned your head against the window as he pulled out of the driveway. Soon after getting in the car you could feel yourself start to drift. 
“Thank you, Con.” you said before fading into a peaceful sleep. 
— — —
Lifting you up was as easy as it had been when you were 8. Though he was thankful you had left your bed unmade, a bad habit you had yet to break, because it made it easy for him to tuck you in.
“I missed you, bug. Sweet dreams.” He says before pressing a kiss to your forehead. Hearing a little gasp he turned to see his mom holding a hand over her heart with tears in her eyes. 
After making their way out into the hall she pulled him in for a hug. 
“You know, she would always go to you. Never me, or your dad, or even Jere. When she was upset, sad, or hurt, she would go to you. On the nights she couldn’t sleep she would find her way into your bed, and you would hold her close.” It was like it was all flashing by again. 
— 
Hearing your distressed little voice after the rather loud bout of thunder got Susannah's attention. 
“Coco,” you called out to your older brother. His door creaked as you swung it open. Susannah had quietly made her way down the hall to make sure you were okay. Though as she peered into her eldest son’s room, her heart clenched at the sight. You had made your way into his bed, and he had wrapped you in a hug. 
“It’s okay, bug. I’ll protect you. Always.” You just squished closer to him and held onto your stuffed animal tighter.
On the nights you couldn't sleep you would think back to this night.
148 notes · View notes
lovernotawriter · 9 months
Text
conrad is actually so real because if my ex who i was still in love with made out with my sibling and i walked in on it happening, i too would be petty the entire ride home.
83 notes · View notes
liaaaaaaakarrrrrrr · 9 months
Text
why is no one else talking about the fucking parallel between the episode 7 Jeremiah and Belly kiss and the eclipse Jacob and Bella kiss?!?!? they’re so the same. the HAND PLACEMENT???? Conrad being right behind them and seeing it while Edward was right behind them seeing it??? please tell me i’m not delusional
Tumblr media Tumblr media
98 notes · View notes
bellysbeach · 9 months
Text
just saying, i am very very very very open to college!conrad requests :))
12 notes · View notes
myrandom-fandomlife · 2 years
Text
so stop me if this is weird
but when reading the books for the first time, and belly talked about her and conrad’s winter trip to cousins that she held so dear to her heart, i thought they were setting up to say she lost her virginity during it
which would be a great plot point on the show because they now have the opportunity to make her and conrad’s relationship less toxic for the time it lasts with the way the show ended, and i always thought her first time should be with conrad. plus this sets up for future angst with jere and belly’s relationship…
62 notes · View notes
leilanismind · 2 years
Text
The Summer I Turned Pretty- Conrad Fisher
Breathtaking
Tumblr media
Summary: Y/N visits Cousins, seeing Conrad after months of not seeing each other because of school.
You open the car door and see your other family run outside the house,” Y/N!” Susannah yells as she runs to hug you tightly. She smiles and admires you,” You’re so beautiful Y/N, where’s Belly?” You point to the car,” She fell asleep, go wake her up.”
Conrad steps out the porch and sees you,” Y/N?” You smile and he runs towards you, scooping you up into his arms,” Holy shit- you’re grown.” You roll your eyes and push his hair back,” Conrad, we’re the same age.” He shrugs,” Don’t ruin the moment, just hug me.” You pull away from his hug and kiss him passionately,” I was getting to that, so inpatient huh?”
Jeremiah’s jaw drops,” Wait, oh I forgot you two were together. Carry on.” Conrad rolls his eyes and wraps his arms around your torso,” After I hug Jeremiah, tell me everything that I missed.” He nods and kisses your head.
Laure heads to the two of you holding each other,” It’s such a relief to finally see you guys together after all this time, we always knew one of the girls would get with one of you guys. Between us though, me and Susannah always knew you two would get together.”
Jeremiah wraps his arm around your waist and spins you into his arms,” Okay, I’ll return her to you soon Conrad let me just hug Y/N.” He sighs,” Man, I just got her back and you’re already being taken away.” You nudge his arm,” You’ll have me all summer.” He smiles and walks up to Belly and Laure hugging them.
Steven hugs the boys last,” Conrad, my little backstabber for getting with my sister.” He shrugs,” Just wait till you see us together all summer, then I’ll be a true backstabber.”
After everyone’s greeted each other, Conrad helps you take your bags upstairs to your room. He drops them on the floor near your dresser and closet, grabbing your hips,” Can you unpack later?” You nod and hug him,” I just wanna hold you for a little, I missed you.” Conrad wraps his arms around your body and lays on the bed.
Someone knocks on the door and you’re already asleep in Conrad’s arms. He always had that affect on you, making you comfortable anywhere. Susannah opens the door,” Oh, she’s asleep?” Conrad nods,” She is?” She smiles and sits on the corner of the bed,” Conrad, I’m glad you two are together. Don’t mess it up son.”
He pushes your hair out of your face,” I love her. I’m not gonna do anything to treat her as if she didn’t mean as much as she really does to me.” Susannah sighs in relief,” Good. Could you two dress up? We’re going out to eat tonight, somewhere fancy. Your dads paying.”
Susannah closes the door,”I love you too.” You say as you burrow your head in between his neck. He holds onto you tighter,” We’ll nap for twenty minutes. Then we have to get dressed.” You nod but after 5 minutes, Conrad falls asleep and you get up to shower.
You pick you out a few options from the clothes you leave for special events in Cousins, choosing a short coral blue dress with beige sandals. Conrad rolls over,” I thought we agreed on a twenty minute nap?” You find a pair of earrings and hand them to Conrad,” Which do you like the most?”
He takes a deep breath in and grabs the earrings from your palm, examining them carefully before handing them back to you,” These diamond ones, they flatter you the most.” He smiles and kisses you’re forehead before getting in the shower himself.
You walk up to the mirror and put them on, you knew he chose them because he’d gotten them for you. Of course, you didn’t mind, you loved them just as much as you loved Conrad.
Susannah knocks on the door,” Come in!” You say. She opens the door and awes at you,” God, you’re breathtaking. You look just like your mother when she was younger, the spitting image.” You smile and Conrad gets out the bathroom seeing her hug you.
She sighs,” Conrad, I have to ask you something.” He nods and follows behind Susannah as she leads him to her bedroom and closes the door. You sit on your vanity and finish doing your hair.
Susannah takes Conrad to her vanity, finding a small white box and handing it to Conrad,” I want you to have this. I’d like it if one day you would give it to Y/N, it would mean the world to me. Like a promise ring.” He opens the box and sees a small diamond on a gold band,” Mom, this is beautiful. But, I can’t.. this has to have some sentimental value.”
She smiles and holds Conrad’s hand in hers tightly,” Oh Connie, my mother gave it to me when I was younger. I want you to give this to Y/N. Give it to her as a ring, a promise ring, anything. I just want you two to have it.” He nods and embraces his mother in a hug,” Thank you, I love you.”
Susannah puts her head into Conrad’s chest,” I love you Connie, now go give it to Y/N please.” He nods and steps out her bedroom. Susannah sits back down on the bed and takes a deep breath,” Did you give him the ring Susannah?” Laurel asks as she steps into the bedroom and sits next to Susannah.
She nods,” I want him to have it, before it was to late and I forgot to ever give it to him.” Laurel wraps her arm around Susannah,” Don’t say that. You’re not leaving my side.” Susannah bites her lip and hugs back Laurel, only wishing she was right.
Conrad steps back into your bedroom and sits on your bed,” What was that about?” You ask. He bites his lip and puts the box in his pocket,” Nothing, you know Susannah. She loves having talks with me about my life.”
You nod and hold onto his arm as you head outside.
After Dinner
Conrad lays on your bed watching as you change out of your dress and into some shorts and a tank top,” Could we take a walk?” He asks. You turn around and stare at him, he looked nervous. You smile and walk with him outside. Steven, Jeremiah, and Belly are sitting on the couch watching TV together while the moms are in the kitchen making popcorn.
Laurel watches as you head outside,” Where are the two of you going? We’re about to watch a movie..” Susannah puts her arm around Laurel,” They’re probably going for a walk. Have fun guys, do try to come back for a little to watch the movie with us though!” Conrad nods and puts his arm on your waist.
Steven whistles as Conrad closes the door,” They’ll be too busy Susannah.” Belly gags and throw a piece of popcorn at Steven,” You’re gross, they probably haven’t even done that yet.” Jeremiah shakes his head,” This one time at the bonfire, they were practically about to do it at the beach.”
Laurel shakes her head,” Okay stop. I don’t want to hear about the kids sex lives. Jesus.” Belly nods,” I’m with you, start the movie already!”
Conrad’s takes off his jacket and puts it around you as the two of you sit on the sand. You rest your body back into Conrad’s chest while you sit between his legs. He takes a deep breath and fishes out the small box out of his pocket,” I wanted you to have something.” You grab the box from Conrad’s hand and open it,” Oh my god, this is stunning Conrad-“
He smiles and kisses your forehead,” It’s a promise ring. I wanted to ask if you’d apply for the same college I’m going too. I know it’s a big question but I think it’d be great. We could even move into a apartment nearby, live together..”
It felt like your heart had stopped beating,” Move in together?” You turn around place your hands around his neck as the two of you stand up,” I want to move in with you if we get into the same college. I love you so much.” Conrad says as he places his hands on your hips.
You look back down at the ring and put it on your right ring finger,” I actually wanted to tell you that I’ve already applied for the same college you applied for. Susannah mentioned what schools you applied for, so I applied for the same ones.” Conrad laughs and picks you up,” This is why I love you!” You yelp as he spins you around and you wrap your legs around his torso.
He leans his head down to kiss you,” I love you Conrad, nothing would make me happier if we got into the same college and decided to move into an apartment.” He smiles and puts you down, but keeps his arms wrapped around your body.
21 notes · View notes
kitscutie · 11 months
Text
august (conrad fisher x reader)
Tumblr media
𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗋𝖺𝖽 𝖿𝗂ꜱ𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗑 𝖿𝖾𝗆!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋
𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀ꜱ: ᖯ𝗂𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗏𝗒 𝗄𝗂ꜱꜱ𝗂𝗇𝗀, 𝗆𝖺𝖽 ᖯ𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗒, ꜱ𝖾𝗑𝗒 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗋𝖺𝖽
𝗉.ꜱ: 𝗂'𝗆 𝗐𝗋𝗂𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺 𝗐𝖺𝗍𝗍𝗉𝖺𝖽 ꜱ𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗒 𝗂𝗇ꜱ𝗉𝗂𝗋𝖾𝖽 ᖯ𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝗂ꜱ 𝗈𝗇 𝗆𝗒 𝖺𝖼𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗍 - 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗅𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗒𝗅𝖺𝗇, 𝗂𝗍'ꜱ 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗃𝗎ꜱ𝗍 𝗒𝖾𝗍 ᖯ𝗎𝗍 ꜱ𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗍𝗎𝗇𝖾𝖽!
ꜱ𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗋𝖺𝖽 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 ᖯ𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝗂𝗇𝗀 ꜱ𝖾𝖼𝗋𝖾𝗍 ꜱ𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝗈𝗈𝗄-𝗎𝗉ꜱ 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗉𝖺ꜱ𝗍 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋ꜱ, 𝗇𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝖺𝗂𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗀𝗈 𝗎𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝖺𝖽𝖺𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗋𝗒 𝗈𝗇 𝗂𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗐𝖺𝗒ꜱ, 𝗎𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗅 ᖯ𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗒 ꜱ𝗁𝗈𝗐ꜱ 𝗎𝗉 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 ᖯ𝗈𝗇𝖿𝗂𝗋𝖾 𝗎𝗇𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖼𝖾𝖽.
a/n: been wanting to write this for a while so BOOM here it is, sooo excited for season two, also im in a deep dylan obrien depression i need help :p ALSO sorry like all my fics are in different styles at the start i'm experimenting atm!
You and Conrad Fisher had known each other since you had popped out of the womb nineteen years ago in the same hospital, only a floor and two hours keeping you apart.
Your moms had been friends since rooming at college and so your friendship, some might say, had been written in the stars quite literally. Fate.
Things had started to change on your sixteenth birthday. It was just before the annual summer reunion, and of course, you and your mom had gone down just one week earlier in order to have a joint birthday celebration with the Fishers and stayed until the Conklin's arrived.
You had hit puberty and he hadn't seen you since the big change but when he did, his eyes could've fell from his skull. It was almost comedic. Of course at the time his stares meant little to you. He was your best friend after all.
Until last year. It was the start of summer bonfire and all was normal. Belly was at home, Jeremiah was off talking to girls with Steven which left you and Conrad. You found it strange he didn't have the same interest in girls as Steven and Jeremiah but who were you to say anything. You wanted him to stay.
Long story short he finally made a move and a kiss began in the abandoned life-guard tower a couple feet away from the main event, it was all going well, almost too well. And you were proven correct when Steven and Jeremiah came down the beach looking for you and found you in that very compromising position.
Seeing as they weren't exactly in a place to talk they agreed to keep it a secret and so it became the new norm for them, seeing the two of you together while your mom, Susannah, Laurel and Belly were non the wiser.
Tumblr media
The bonfire was in full-swing, Summer had officially begun and what better way to start it than in the lap of Conrad Fisher on Cousins Beach.
He was sat cross legged on the blanket you'd brought from the house, while you sat atop him, legs either side of his own.
"I just think we should be nicer to her, I mean that was us three years ago." You sighed, you'd had a beer or two and were feeling increasingly guilty about the disallowance of Belly to come tonight.
"None of us were allowed out at sixteen, it's only fair." Conrad replied, voice low and relaxed. Something you appreciated about him, he was a very soothing person.
"Yeah, but that's different! We all had each other and now-" You began but he cut you off with a groan.
"Can we please not talk about Belly when your sat on me?" He said, smile gracing his lips.
You began to 'ew' and berate him but were soon cut off by his lips on yours, one of his hands holding your jaw in place while the other sat comfortably on the upper part of your thigh.
It didn't take much for you to open up, his tongue instantly hitting against yours as he deepened the kiss. When your mouths disconnected, it made a sound which made your head go light and airy.
"Do you still feel bad?" He whispered. Hand moving up to put a stray piece of hair behind your ear.
"No." You answered, shooting forward to connect your lips once more. He chuckled into the kiss, teeth clashing together but you didn't care you just wanted him.
His spare hand slowly and nonchalantly drifted to the hem of your shorts, groping your ass gently, you were still in public after all and Conrad wanted to be able to say he had an ounce of class and respect. Even if it was a lie.
A disruption to the left of you and Conrad caught your attention and you went to turn your head, lips still interlocked but he denied that, hand on your jaw tightening and turning your head back to look at him.
The final straw was a resounding 'Ooh' from the crowd and you decided no matter what he did you were going to see what was happening.
Finally turning your head you found Belly. On the floor. And looking directly at you. A lot was wrong with that.
"Shit, Conrad." You said, which finally got his face away from placing delicate kisses across your jaw and to see the same thing as you. His face also dropping.
"Belly?" He said, unable to stop himself in disbelief.
Really this would've been the right time to get out of his lap but you were frozen in fear, forgetting you were sat there in the first place.
"I thought me and Y/N were like your sisters." She said, anger painted on her face. You didn't like confrontation in the first place and so saying something was hard but you couldn't let Belly think badly of you or Conrad.
"Belly look- it's different-" You defended, but she once again cut you off in anger and while your throat tightened in anxiety, you felt Conrad's hand soothe over your back. Reassuring and subtle.
"Different? I know him just as well as you do. It's not different." She seethed. Stepping closer to the two of you.
"Belly, c'mon you know what I mean." You whispered unintentionally. Your eyes were going glassy, feeling looks from all around you. Some in agreeance with you, some with her but none knew the full story.
"We've been together since last year. It was after you left to take Steven to look at Colleges." Conrad stepped in while Belly processed. Preventing another dig at you.
"I thought you weren't ready for a relationship and that, may I remind you again, we're like sisters to you?" Belly replied.
"I didn't-" Conrad started though a hurt look from you cut him off. "Look I said that like two years ago, it isn't even relevant anymore. Clearly." He said. Eyes connecting with you to reassure you, not her.
"You're such a brat." He added, seeing the affect her words had on you.
"Well you're an asshole." Belly yelled back, all while you sat stunned and quiet.
"Belly! You came, great, we can all hang out." Jeremiah said enthusiastically running over. You appreciated his intervention, as obvious as it was that he was trying to distract her.
"I'm about to take her home." Steven cut him off.
"What?" Jeremiah said, confused. Though the situation was bad she was old enough to be out past ten pm. Whether Steven liked it or not.
"Yeah, we're leaving, are you kidding me?" Steven replied as if it was obvious. Grabbing her hand.
"Ok, Steven come on. Go hang out with Shayla or something." Jeremiah answered and you couldn't help but admire the boy and his love for Belly.
You tore your eyes away from the conversation above you as they dispersed, looking back at Conrad who was sighing and pushing hair from his face.
"It'll be okay." You said, knowing what he needed without having to ask.
"I know." He smiled gently, though his eyes didn't fully match. He was worried, and you couldn't blame him.
Belly knew, and worst of all, just five months ago she had confided in you about her crush on Conrad and so it was unclear if she would ever even speak to you again.
Guilt was swallowing you whole.
2K notes · View notes
amnesique · 8 months
Note
jealous conrad fisher? smut if you want, but it doesn't need to be
false god — conrad fisher
Tumblr media
(gif made by @conradfiisher , all credits to the creator)
warnings: SMUT (18+, MINORS DNI), car sex, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, p in v, slightly praise kink (not mentioned but—), NOT PROOFREAD
you were outside at a college party and you were talking to some guy that approached you while you were waiting for your boyfriend to show up. you didn't know what was taking him so long, but you were starting to feel uncomfortable that the guy wouldn't stop looking at you up and down, even though you already mentioned that you had a boyfriend who you were waiting for.
disconnecting from the conversation for a few seconds, you pulled out your phone and texted conrad, your boyfriend, to let him know that that guy was bothering you and to hell him to hurry up. exactly then the guy wrapped his arm around your neck, pulling you towards his body and forcing you to look up from your phone to his face.
"are you texting your boyfriend?" he asked, grinning like a douchebag, leaning even closer to you, if that was even possible.
what was wrong with him? didn't he believe you that you had a boyfriend or did he take it as some kind of a sick challenge?
you tucked your hair behind your ear, putting your phone back in your pocket, wanting to take his arm off of you, but he held you close. "yeah," you said, shifting your weight from one leg to the other. "i actually am," you smiled politely, trying in vain to be nice to such a piece of shit.
"where is he?"
"he is right fucking here," conrad's voice spoke from behind you two and it made you let out the breath you hadn't even realized you'd been holding, your body relaxing a bit as the guy removed his arm off of you to turn around and look at your boyfriend. "that's my girl in case you didn't know,” he added and moved closer to you and placed his hand protectively on your waist.
the boy threw his hands in the air, pretending not to know anything about it, and you almost laughed in his face, while conrad held back himself from killing him.
he left, so it was just you with conrad, but his grip around your waist hadn't loosened. he was still stressed, you could feel it in his touch, but at the same time your mind was going elsewhere when you remembered how his fingers felt on his skin.
"what was all that about?" he asked you, continuing to look in the direction the guy had taken her, but you couldn't help but look at how good he looked. your mind didn't seem to work every time he would appear around you, mostly when he would touch you like that.
you shrugged, and that was the first time he had ever looked only in your direction, focusing now all of his attention on you. "i did told him that i have a boyfriend, but i guess he took it as a challenge."
conrad grinned and he pressed you against his body, continuing to keep his hand around your waist. "you're so stunning, i'm not surprised he dared to take a look at what's mine," he said, caressing your cheek with the thumb of his free hand as you locked your gaze on his.
he knew the effect his words had on him. he knew how to make you melt in his hands, how to make you a complete disaster under his touch.
"are you saying you're jealous?" you asked, looking at his lips, noticing how he laughed and you felt your whole body shake when he did it.
"i don't have reasons to be jealous when i know i'm the only one you think of," he said and his hand moved from your cheek to the chain around your neck that he had given you, tugging on it gently.
you longed for his kiss, for him. and he knew it, and that's why he was dragging it out as long as he could, until he would've lost his mind too. it wasn't easy at all for him to look at you and not kiss you, but it was worth teasing you a little bit.
both of his hands moved down to your ass, on top of the material of your dress, pinning you against his body, and kissing your neck, making you rest your head on his shoulder and letting out a weak whimper right next to his ear.
his teasing was already becoming his torture because he couldn't afford doing more than this to you in public, so he whispered in your ear. "do you want to take this to my car?"
you nodded, feeling how he wanted you too because of the approaching between your bodies. "yes, please," you said and he grinned into your hair, staying a little longer in the moment and after that, he rushed to the car, pulling you by your hand after him.
you awkwardly chuckled behind him. it was kind of funny how needy you both were when it came to the other, how easily you would've ignite for one another.
when you two got to the car, the both of you stopped and looked at each other. conrad was unsure of his next move, and he just kept caressing your hand that he was still holding, looking at you as if he could see through you, even though it was actually dark where his car was parked. "soo," he said, exaggerating the last letter. "how will it go?"
you grinned at him, and he felt the ground slipping from under his feet, as you opened the driver's door, motioning for him to climb in first. he looked at you confused for a second, but your grin wouldn't go away, so he eventually caught on your idea, so he climbed in, pushing his chair all the way back and reaching his hand out to you.
you accepted his hand and sat yourself carefully with your thighs on either side of his lap as you closed the door immediately behind you.
you leaned into him, your chest pressing against his, and you kissed him, slowly, wanting to make him lose his mind like he did with you.
he placed one hand placed on your waist —and you let out a sound right then— and the other placed on your cheek, caressing it in circles. the ring on his thumb made such a lovely contact with the skin of your cheek and it made you lose yourself in the kiss, at one point even slightly parting your lips, at which point he took the opportunity to deepen the kiss.
your tongues teasing each other, fighting for dominance, as the kiss only increased your desire even more.
he had been the first to break the kiss, his hand still on your cheek and his breathing heavy as he said, "i need to feel you."
and you felt the same need.
you agreed, bringing your foreheads together, just enough to try and steady your breathing as you felt yourself starting to get even wetter at those words, and feeling him hard right under your ass.
because you were wearing a dress, you only had to deal with his clothes, so you slipped your hands between your bodies to undo his pants. feeling a little freer, conrad made a faint sound of relief, and he moved his hips a little higher —making your front sliding right against his erection, making you let out a soft sound as well—, to make your work easier.
once his jeans and his boxers were out of your way, you stood up a little, him helping you put your underwear aside, and when you laid back down on him. he buried himself inside of you, inch by inch, making you rest your head on his shoulder to mask the needy whimpers that escaped your lips.
he lifted your chin with two fingers, making you look into his green eyes that were burning into your skin, leaving his mark on you. “let me hear you,” he whispered, and then, seeing how you looked at him, he couldn't help but connect his lips with yours in another tender kiss.
his movements were full of desire, but also tender, moving somewhat slowly inside you as he kissed you like his life depended on it and as one hand of his massaged your clit.
you were grinding on top of him, putting your hands on either side of his neck as he helped you, holding you by your waist with his free hand, lifting you up and down on him.
it felt so good, way too good, that you started moaning into the kiss, knowing how much he loved hearing you.
"you're doing such a good job," he whispered in your ear, taking a break from kissing your lips, and going to place kisses on your neck.
you dropped your head to the side to give him more access to your neck, arching your back, and you felt yourself tighten slightly around him.
"just like that," he groaned next to your ear, increasing the rhythm in which he massaged your clitoris, him wanting to bring you to your orgasm as quickly as possible, because himself also couldn't last much longer.
your hands slid from around his neck to his shoulders, you pulling him close to you as the knot in your stomach felt too tight, almost close to breaking free.
both of your breaths had become rushed once again. you could hear him next to your ear as you could even hear yourself. that rushed they were.
"i'm sure no one could've made you feel this good, right?" he asked you, feeling your walls tighten more around him.
you nodded, chasing after your orgasm and starting to kiss him under his near, on his neck, on his jaw.
his jaw clenched, struggling to hold himself back a little longer, even if his movements had become sloppy. "tell me, do you think that douchebag would've made you feel this good?"
you couldn't believe what you were hearing, but still, his jealousy had just been what made you let go.
unable to hold on even longer, as he felt the release wash over you, and your breathing slowly beginning to ease against his neck, conrad let go as well, his release filling you as a little bit of it was leaking down your inner thighs.
with him still inside you and you on his shoulder, your breathing had calmed down, but you hadn't forgotten what he said exactly before you finished, so you looked up to look at his eyes.
"you said you're not jealous,” you said amused.
he looked at you with his lips parted and his short front hair catching in his eyes. "well, i'm not."
you moved a little on top of him, as he whimpered and you shivered, so you can put your hands around his neck and get a better look at him. "and then what was that before?"
“i don't know what you're talking about,” he wrapped his arms around your waist.
“you do,” you said with a grin on the corner of your mouth. “ too well” you added, as you leaned over him to capture his lips into another kiss.
2K notes · View notes
Note
conrad thanksgiving fic please!!
This has been in my drafts for a long time...sorry. I might delete later, I don't really like it. It's not giving what I wanted it to...
Request: You’ve done Conrad dating a Haley James type of character, what about a Blair Waldorf type character? Old money, fiercely strong, rich, and outspoken. She and Belly would NOT get along, at all. He takes her to Thanksgiving dinner and Susannah is still there and she loves her
my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time
Tumblr media
Thanksgiving had always been a massive celebration in your family. Every year, your parents would go all out and host a dinner with their closest friends and their families. Your mother would direct the caterer team and make sure everything was perfect before the guests’ arrival. At the end the meal by having a slice of your father’s infamous pumpkin pie — which was your personal favorite part. 
This year, Thanksgiving was going to be different. Your father was in Paris for business and your mother somewhere in Europe, expanding her collection of vintage designer handbags. Had you not been in college, you would have happily joined her.
‘’Why don’t you come with me to Boston?’’ Conrad asked as you watched him pack a bag for the weekend.  ‘’My mom keeps asking me when she’ll get to meet you.’’ 
The thought of spending Thanksgiving alone had been looming over you, and Conrad's invitation was like a ray of light. 
A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips. ‘’You told your mother about me?’’
‘’Not really,’’ Conrad explained, picking another sweater and adding it into his bag. ‘’She heard your voice when she called the other day and Jeremiah told her all about you. He’s such a big mouth...’’ He shook his head, wishing his brother could hold his tongue sometimes. 
Susannah was ecstatic to have another guest for dinner. It was on very short notice and most of the preparations were already done when Conrad informed her of your addition to the table, but she would never pass up an opportunity to meet her Connie’s new girlfriend.  
When you and Conrad walked in, Susannah was all over you, complimenting your dress and how gorgeous you looked. You were quick to return her compliments, pointing out how her eyes looked exactly like Conrad's.
You met the other guests — Conrad’s father and brother, then Laurel and her kids —, and all were surprised by who Conrad had brought home. No one ever expected him to date someone born of old money. He’s dated Nicole, but she was nowhere as rich as your family. 
‘’Look at this amazing table,’’ Susannah said as she brought in the turkey, looking very proud of herself. ‘’Martha Stewart can kiss my ass!’’
Your eyes went wide for a short second, not expecting such words from her. She looked so sweet and delicate. 
Conrad shook his head at his mother, happy to see her being herself again. 
Everyone got seated, then Susannah spoke again. ‘’Before we eat, let’s go around the table and say one thing that we’re thankful for. Jere Bear, you can start.’’  
You lifted your eyes at Jeremiah across the table, who looked nothing like his brother. If you hadn’t known, you would never have guessed they were related. 
‘’I’m thankful for my mom,’’ the younger Fisher began, ‘’who reconsidered trying this new treatment for us. I don’t know what I would do without you, Mom.’’ He glanced at his mother, his eyes shiny with unshed tears. 
Susannah squeezed his hand over the table while everyone was trying to not get emotional. 
Conrad had told you about his mother’s breast cancer having come back in the spring. He tried to hide her sickness from you, but when you found him crying in his dorm on a Saturday afternoon, you knew something wasn’t okay. It was a tough subject for the entire family — especially since it was the second time she was going through this. For that, Susannah didn’t like to talk about cancer. She didn’t want her whole life to revolve around it just because a nasty tumor had returned in her body. She wanted to live her life the way it’s always been…and take a few more sitting breaks when needed.
In turn, the other guests said what they were thankful for. It went from Steven getting a car for his birthday to Belly becoming captain of her school’s volley-ball team and Laurel being a typical mom and being thankful for her children. 
‘’Connie, it’s your turn,’’ Susannah said, motioning to her eldest son.
Conrad nodded at his mom, then cleared his throat. ‘’Jeremiah took the words out of my mouth, so I’ll say something else I’m equally thankful for.’’ His lips tugged up into a little half smile and he reached over the table to take your hand in his. ‘’I’m thankful for meeting my amazing girlfriend, who came into my life at the most unexpected, yet perfect moment.’’ 
You smiled back at Conrad, giving his fingers a little squeeze. 
Seated before you, Belly snickered lightly. ‘’Can we eat now? Mom didn't want us to get snacks on the way here and I’m starving.’’ 
Laurel gave her daughter a pointed glare, wishing she would behave. 
Although the pumpkin pie didn’t come close to your father’s recipe, you made sure to tell Susannah it reminded you of home. 
‘’I hope your parents are not too sad that you came to Boston instead,’’ Susannah said, incapable of imagining spending Thanksgiving without her family — especially her boys. 
‘’Not at all, Mrs. Fisher,’’ you politely replied. ‘’My parents were both out of the country this Thanksgiving. Business related travel.’’
Susannah raised an eyebrow. ‘’Oh? What is it that they do?’’ 
You didn’t mean to brag, but she had asked. ‘’My mother is a fashion designer and my father is a lawyer at my grandfather’s firm.’’ 
You caught Belly rolling her eyes and muttering something. You didn’t care what she thought of you, you were the one who got to share Conrad’s bed at the end of the day. Ignoring her childish reactions, you continued talking to Susannah about your parents. She was very interested in your mother’s designs.
When dinner was officially over, you all vacated the table. Jeremiah and Steven went to the living room to set up a game for the five of you to play — another family tradition. You had never played cards against humanity before, but you’ll give it a try. 
Before you reached the living room, Conrad pulled you in a corner near the stairs, wanting some time alone with you. 
‘’Belly despises me,’’ you pointed to him, keeping your voice down so no one would hear.
Conrad rolled his eyes as he curled an arm around you, knowing how you had the tendency to exaggerate things. ‘’She does not. She’s just…having difficulty accepting that I moved on.’’
You made a face at him. ‘’Don’t you defend her. Have you seen all the sour looks she gave me during dinner? Your eyes might be the most beautiful shade of blue, my love, but I believe they are in need of a visual acuity test. You should schedule one when we get back to Palo Alto.’’ 
Conrad chuckled, amused by your theatrics. 
‘’Belly is going to be tougher to win with your charm. Like every ex-girlfriend, she’s gonna try to paint you as a mean girl, so you just have to show her that you’re the opposite. Compliment her. Tell her you like her sweater.’’
‘’But it looks itchy. It’s probably polyester.’’ 
The corner of Conrad’s lips turned into a smile.
All and more taglist: @spiokybirdstarfish @kenqki @liidiaaag @hawkegfs  @gillybear17  @areaderinlove @acornacreacure @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @rosie-cameron @Caxddce @laylasbunbunny @gemofthenight @beautyb1ade  @hi-bored-as-fcuk-rn  @lovelyy-moonlight @mellabella101 @vxnity713  @marzipaanz  @bisexualgirlsblog @queenofslytherin889 @thatbxtchesblog @softb-tterfly @ethanlandrycanbreakmyheart  @xyzstar  @graceberman3  @Heartsforneteyamsully  @aerangi  @hallecarey1  @bxbyyyjocelyn @mikeyspinkcup @jackierose902109 @daisydark @laurasdrey @mischieftom @fanatic4niall @peterholland04 @idkwhattonamethisblogs @grxnde-dwt @lexasaurs634 @teeeree13 @notasadgirlipromise @zoeynicolas @thejuleshypothesis @multi-fandom-bi-bitch @lexasaurs634 @teeeree13 @notasadgirlipromise @thejuleshypothesis@Shasta89 @sierraluvz @specialk6802  @CZARINERA
TSITP taglist: @msmarvelknight  @maritaleane @dingus0401 @idontknowwhatimdoing777 @nomorespahgetti @lomlolivia @5sosbands @bloodyhw @depthsofdespairr @a-band-aid-for-your-heart @gilbertscurls @brandirouse86 @leilani-nichole @bloody-mf-bsc @papayaboyluvr  @bchindureyes @bellysbeach  @slytherinambitious @darylscvmdumpster  @johannelis2302nely  @aqshua @foockingasshole @straberryshortcake143 @luiise  @sickntiredtoo  @adrluvh @mymultiveres @Rosekar16 @hopeurokays @amysangrl  @hopelessromantic727  @beth-gallagher22 @lonelywitchv2  @arinexeisnotworking @cloudrainy342 @theflcwer  @alllriseabove  @angelxxrose @angelxxrose-blog  @r1vrsefx
492 notes · View notes
wqterlillypdfs · 1 year
Text
summer blues
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: jeremiah fisher x fem!reader, bestfriend!steven conklin x fem!reader
summary: All summer, you had been in some strange sad limbo, and you had blamed Jeremiah for that. For all the girls he had kissed at every party, for the way he made your heart beat and palms grow clammy. But really, was it his fault when you were the one who pushed him away?
word count: 3.3k
warnings: underage drinking, swearing, general sad thoughts. dumbass idiot jeremiah. unedited!
a/n: i went thru like the full range of emotions writing this fic, idk how i feel abt it but this is my comeback after three months of no writing. anyways, hope u enjoy!! 💞. reblogs are appreciated as always!
Tumblr media
The sun sets low, casting a warm glow upon the unfamiliar garden. The air is thick with the hum of laughter and music that drifts from the house, and everything seems perfect. It should be perfect. This is the stuff summer dreams are made of, and yet, you’re sitting on the outdoor furniture, alone, and left to your own devices.
Summer so far has been nothing but longing. You had watched as the one boy who had captured your heart at ten spent days at the beach with girls you didn’t even know the names of. And sure, it’s not like you have anything, not even close. But could you blame yourself? Jeremiah was nothing but perfect Carolina-blue eyes and golden skin. He was your summer dream.
The house party was meant to be a distraction, that’s what Steven had said when he tugged you into his car. It’ll be fun, you need to stop being sad all summer. He was nothing but adamant to make this summer the best yet, especially with the overhanging weight that Conrad and himself would be moving to college next year. Steven had never been fond of change, especially not when it came to summers at Cousins.
Steven had long since abandoned you to dance the night away with pretty girls and hooting boys, so instead here you are, sitting alone at a party, trying to fill the Jeremiah-shaped cavity in your heart with fruity drinks and loud music. 
Jeremiah hadn’t been in sight when you first arrived at the party, and maybe that was a good thing. You could enjoy yourself for once, without your wandering eyes finding him somewhere with his hand on a girl's waist. Even just the thought of it made you sick to your stomach.
But sometime between then and now, he had shown up. Figures. And now you watch as he makes his way out of the big back doors, down the patio steps, past the pool, until he’s sitting with you in the makeshift gazebo, fairy lights sparkling above.
“Hey trouble,” Jeremiah greets as he sits on the plush outdoor sofa next to you, sidled up close enough that he bumps his shoulder with yours in welcome.
“Hey,” you parrot back, not meaning for the obvious buzzkill tone in your voice.
“What’s got you all bummed out?”
“Dunno.” you reply, eyeing the cold drink you’re balancing on your thigh which leaves a cold ring of condensation on your bare skin. “Did Steven send you to get me?”
Jeremiah’s eyebrows draw together in confusion as he cocks his head to the side. “No? Why would he need to? Can I not check up on my favourite girl?”
You let out a bemused snort, running your finger around the brim of your glass, eyes still not meeting his. Maybe you have had too much to drink.
“Come dance with me,” he says instead, hand outstretched, waiting for yours. You let your head fall against the back of the sofa.
“Not in a dancing mood.”
You don’t know if it’s the drinks or if it’s real, but Jeremiah shakes his head, a soft smile gracing his features as he tucks the stray strands of hair that have fallen in front of your face behind your ear. His hand lingers there a few seconds too long.
“What happened to dancing the summer away?” He questions, and when you finally look up to meet his eyes, he’s much closer than you expected.
“I was fifteen when I said that,” you note, which was almost two years ago now. How does he remember these things?
Jeremiah doesn’t respond immediately so you take your eyes off him, instead you watch the house glow to life, light filling the windows as the dark night begins to blanket the sky. The garden itself is empty with most of the party opting to escape the summer heat by seeking shelter indoors. A few girls are busy by the poolside, and you notice one of them keeps diverting her gaze back to where you and Jeremiah are sitting. Typical.  It was like every girl in Cousins was obsessed with the prospect of at least one of the Fisher boys taking fancy in them. Was it bad that it always made you jealous? Everyone who sees him, wants him, and you wish you could keep him as just yours.
“You have an admirer,” you point out, nodding to the girl by the pool. You must admit, she’s gorgeous. Pretty brown eyes and gorgeous hair that even when wet seems to frame her face perfectly. You slink further down in your seat.
Jeremiah simply rolls his eyes at you. “Well she is pretty.” 
And you know he means it as a joke. Can tell by the stupid grin and the tone of his voice. But the words are still like a dagger to your heart, twisting and turning until you can barely breathe - and oh God, you need to get out of here and away from him. 
You set the drink down by the sofa, it meets the wooden deck with a too-loud clink before you stand abruptly. You brush down the skirt that had ridden up your legs as the ring of water on your thigh left behind by the glass soaks the edges of it. “I need to go,” is all you can murmur out.
“No, wait-” Jeremiah begins, standing to follow you.
“It’s fine,” you push, faux niceties lacing your voice, smiling as much as the ache in your chest will let you. You can feel the frown on his face burn into your back as you turn to leave, but you choose to ignore it, instead making your way back into the large lively house.
As you pass the pool though, the girl who has been eyeing Jeremiah gets up with a giddy look on her face, she calls to him in a sweet honeyed voice and it makes you sick. 
You climb the patio steps, making your way through the lavish interior of the house.
You push through the crowd of people within the house. You just need a moment to yourself, to gather your thoughts and figure out just what the fuck was going on with you. Carefully, you slip into the bathroom, pushing the door shut with the weight of your body before leaning against the sink. You take deep breaths, trying to calm the beating of your heart.
All summer, you had been in some strange sad limbo, and you had blamed Jeremiah for that. For all the girls he had kissed at every party, for the way he made your heart beat and palms grow clammy. But really, was it his fault when you were the one who pushed him away?
Being in love with Jeremiah Fisher was anything but easy, not when you had to dance around the intricate friendship that had blossomed since you were eight years old. You didn’t know what love was until you were fifteen, sitting on the pier with him as you skidded rocks across the ocean. When he had smiled that smile and his eyes sparkled like the entire cosmos was within them. From that very moment on, you were doomed. Every brush of his hand against yours felt like a calculated step, and it was your fault for deluding yourself into believing he had space in his heart for anything more than a friendship with you.
It’s only a million times worse when you’re as close with him as you are, casual flirting and lingering touches was nothing but the norm. So it was especially difficult when he’d grab your hand and lead you through a crowd, or whisper some stupid inside joke just for you in a crowded room, when such a simple touch set your body alight with sparks. 
“Knock knock,” you hear the door open softly, Steven’s head poking through. You had forgotten to lock the door, you realise. “Jeremiah thinks you're mad at him.” He informs, voice careful and soft as he closes the door behind him, making his way to you and placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.
You shake your head, unable to find the words to express the turmoil within yourself. Instead, you offer a weak smile letting out a shaky exhale. “Well, I’m not.”
Steven looks amused as he leans with his back against the sink next to you, tilting his head so it falls into your field of vision. “You sure?”
“Very sure.” You confirm.
“I think you’re lying.”
You take another breath, “I’m not mad, i’m just…” your voice trails off as you try to find the words.
“Angry, confused, sad?” Steven offers.
You shake your head as you poke his shoulder, “would you let me speak?”
“Yes ma’am, sorry ma’am,” he throws his hands up in surrender.
“I’m just… tired,” you say, defeated. Steven gives you an apologetic look. He’s known about your not-so-little crush on Jeremiah. How could he not when he seemed to be the only person who could light you up when you were dim and down? 
“I’m tired of having to watch him go out with other girls every other day. I mean it’s not like we’re exclusive - we’re definitely not - but I just wish I didn’t feel like throwing up everytime.”
For a second, Steven doesn’t say anything, he looks at you with those eyes he does when he’s thinking. “What’s that thing Susannah always says?”
“What?”
“About…” He blows out his bottom lip as he struggles to remember the words, “about how love is like a flower, it needs time to grow and blossom and you need to nurture it.”
You pause, before cracking a smile. “Never in a million years would I have even imagined you quoting one of Susannah’s cheesy pieces of romance advice.”
Steven rolls his eyes at you, but he can’t help the smile that creeps up on him too. “Look, the point is, love isn’t supposed to be easy. Like, at all. But you really like Jeremiah, and I get it, he can really suck sometimes, especially with the whole hooking up thing,” - he looks up at you as he finishes his sentence, - “but if you love him as much as you let on, you’ve gotta just go for it. You need to stop pushing him away because of your irrational fear.”
Shaking your head, you turn fully to face Steven, crossing your arms defensively across your chest. “Okay, it’s not irrational, it’s completely rational. What if I just end up ruining everything? That’s a super real possibility. I don’t want to lose Jeremiah as a friend, and the risk of running that possibility is way too high.”
“God,” Steven lets out through a sigh, he looks like he wants to strangle you. “Listen to yourself! Maybe if you haven’t been moping around all summer you’d be able to see it.”
“See what?”
“Just go out there and talk to the boy.”
“This’d be a lot easier if you just told me.”
“I think you’d appreciate me a lot more if you figured it out for yourself.” Steven tells you, and he says it in a way that leaves little room to bicker back. He gives you an encouraging nod and a soft smile and for a minute you think he’ll say another stupid thing like go get ‘em tiger! But he graces you with silence and leaves you alone in the small bathroom.
You look back at yourself in the mirror. Maybe Steven is right. 
‧₊˚☆༉‧₊˚.
Jeremiah is sitting on the steps of the patio when he hears the sliding glass doors open and shut and the shuffle of Steven’s old sneakers. Immediately, his head swivels so he’s facing his long-time best friend. “So what’d she say? Is she mad?” He blurts out immediately.
“Woah, slow down lover-boy,” Steven says, amusement in his tone. He takes a seat next to Jeremiah, placing his hands either side of himself. “Well, she’s not happy.”
“What the fuck, bro,” Jeremiah grumbles, “you were meant to deescalate the situation.”
“Actually no, I was checking up on my friend, who I care about, and who I haven’t been dancing around all summer long.” Steven corrects.
Jeremiah looks away, unamused, “okay I get it. I haven’t been the best person to her lately.”
“Really?” Steven gasps, faux surprise lacing his tone, “You’ve been avoiding her like the plague and hanging around with random girls like you want her to be upset.”
“I don’t!” Jeremiah is quick to retort. “I’m just…”
“You’re just being a dick.”
“That’s not fair-”
“Look man, I’m not trying to upset you either, but I really don’t get why you’re so scared to confront your feelings. You like her, you like her a lot and it’s so fuckin’ obvious.”
Jeremiah opens his mouth, ready to argue back, but Steven leaves no room for it.
“She literally craves your attention and you’re out here, making out with other girls like she’s not right there. Is this some weird attention grab sort of thing? What, are you trying to make her jealous? This isn’t like you, Jere.”
Steven’s words cut deep. So deep Jeremiah thinks they’ve scarred him, but maybe it’s for the best. No, it’s definitely for the best. 
“Think about it,” is the last thing Steven says, before he stands up, giving Jeremiah a reassuring pat on the back, and disappears into the crowd of party-goers within the house.
‧₊˚☆༉‧₊˚.
When you finally feel ready enough to leave the bathroom, you think for a moment about Steven’s words. They kick around in your head. You chuckle to yourself, who knew you’d ever be taking legitimate advice from Steven? But instead of confronting your problems like you should, you pour yourself another drink, turning on your heels as you ascend the glossy white stairs. Whoever’s house this is - in the words of Steven himself - they’re fucking loaded. 
The upstairs of the house is empty, albeit a few straggling couples making out in the hallway. You ignore them, noticing the gorgeous open balcony that conjoins to the hallway you’re currently walking down. It’s quiet and empty, a perfect place to spend the rest of the night in peace.
The moon hangs low in the sky now, reflecting off the ocean ahead, and as you step out onto the balcony the cool Summer night’s air bites at your skin. 
It's a glorious view for what should’ve been a perfect night. Laughter and music wafts up from the party below, and you let out another regretful sigh, your heart heavy with the weight of unspoken words. As your eyes linger on the ocean, you hear the sound of approaching footsteps. You turn to see Jeremiah standing beside you, and when you look at him, he gives you that sweet smile.
“Hey trouble,” he begins, “you alright?”
You shrug, turning your back to the balcony as you slide your back down the railing, slumping to the floor with your knees tucked under your chin. “Trying to be.”
“Wanna tell me what’s wrong?”
Jeremiah with such a soft voice felt unnatural, and a part of you felt guilty for rendering him so quiet. Silence stretches between both of you like a chasm, as you struggle to find the right words within you to tell him how you truly felt. Instead, Jeremiah fills the silence, his voice hesitant but filled with a quiet determination. “I’m sorry.”
You gave him a perplexed look, “what are you apologising for?”
“For this entire summer,” he says, sitting on the ground next to you as he takes the cool glass from your hands, fingers brushing yours, before he places it on the ground. You tilt your head, curiosity in your eyes as you wait for him to continue.
“I’ve been an asshole. Like, bigtime, and I'm really sorry.” He takes a deep breath, takes your hand in his carefully, softly, like you’re something to be worshipped. To him you are. “And, I… need to tell you something.”
You look up at him, heart racing with anticipation, “what is it?” you all but murmur.
He takes a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours. “I just-” and when he can’t find the right words, because how is he meant to compress everything he’s ever felt for you into one sentence? It’s impossible. He instead uses his actions. 
His hands untangle from yours, grabbing the sides of your face before pulling you into a kiss. He kisses you. He kisses you and the world falls away and there’s nothing but him. At first, you don’t know what to do, it’s all so sudden, but when it finally registers, you want to cry. Not sad tears, and not entirely tears of joy either, tears of relief, tears that carry the weight of all your longing.
When he finally pulls away you’re quick to pull him back, holding him as close as humanly possible as you kiss him with all the fervour you can muster, hoping and praying he can taste the apology on your lips. But when it gets too much, and you need air, you pull away again. He looks at you, and you hold onto the fabric of his shirt tighter because this all feels like a dream.
“She isn’t you.” He murmurs, soft enough it could be carried away by the summer breeze.
“What?” you whisper back, as to not break the sacred quietness.
“She's. Not. You. None of them are, none of them could even dream of being you. They’re not funny like you, not gorgeous like you. They don’t know me like you do - Shit, I sound like a sap.”
You chuckle, “no, please do continue.”
He shoots you that heartstopping grin. “Oh, so you do like it when I flatter you?”
“Love it,” you answer, mirroring his grin.
His features soften for a second, and again, the apologies cascade from his lips. “I’m sorry, for being such an asshole. You deserve so much better than me, I’ve been the worst, and I didn’t mean to make you upset or jealous, I was just… nervous. God, you make me so nervous I do the dumbest shit.”
“I make you nervous?” You can’t help the disbelief in your voice.
“Like you wouldn’t believe.” He says, nothing but sincere. He smiles then, and that makes all of it worthwhile. 
You don’t know for how long you manage to get lost in him, but when your thoughts begin to wander, you let the thoughts flow freely from your lips. “Remember when we were ten,” you say, recounting the memory that started this all, “we had snuck out to the beach. We got home so late that night, and we tried to sneak back in, but of course that never works with Susannah. She had said something like-”
“No more sneaking out for the both of you,” Jeremiah continues, “she said we’d had too much fun.”
“But we did it anyway.” You finish, dumbfounded that he remembers that at all. “How do you remember all these things?”
“Because it’s you.” He says it like it’s obvious by now. His pretty blue eyes don’t leave yours for even a second. “I don’t think I’ve loved anyone the way I love you.”
You look at him with that stellar smile he loves so much, but before he can speak, you’re interrupted by the familiar presence of the boy who played cupid. 
Steven shakes his head, clear amusement in his eyes. "Finally,” he breathes out, as if it pained him to see the both of you dance around each other all summer. It probably did. His hands are wrapped around a cool glass, it’s empty. “I think this has been quite a night.”
You nod, blissful, turning to meet Jeremiah’s blue eyes. They speak volumes in themselves, a deep ocean blue that sparkles with some form of admiration, you can’t quite figure it out. “Let’s get outta here,” he says, pushing himself off the balcony floor as he extends a hand for you to take, which you do.
Maybe, this summer could be perfect after all.
‧₊˚☆༉‧₊˚.
general tag list: @thatfangirl42
tsitp tag list: @seaveysoceaneyes @fens-mire @thatonefangirl444
if u wanna be added or removed from my general taglist, or a specific fandom taglist just let me know!
2K notes · View notes
tatoda · 10 months
Text
Guitar Pick | college!conrad x fem!reader
Tumblr media
request
masterlist
part 2
summary: you go to Brown and maybe you don’t exactly fit in, but one brown haired boy makes you feel as if you do
pairing: college!conrad fisher x fem!reader
warnings: just fluff <3
wc: 800 (sorry it's short im getting back into things)
first con fic since last year :) a little rusty on the writing i apologize. sorry it’s not so long :(
Tumblr media
It was the smell in the air that brought you comfort. The casual people-watching you would do as you walked down to the music store closest to campus— it wasn’t the best place to shop but it will do for the times you’re in Providence.
The ding of the door sounded as you walked through the store. The red interior with wood floors reminded you of back home, so that is why you kept coming back to the same spot every weekend. No one tried to bother you when shopping. Of course some boys would walk by and you’d glance their way, but they would never glance back at you the same way.
Picking up a guitar from one of the stands you sat down at the small corner couch. You have always loved playing any instrument, you would run around the house singing and hitting any object around the house to make drums until your aunt got you a ukulele at the age of 6 which took your dreams and desires for music to grow. Being at Brown surprised your family. They really thought you would just go to a music school, but you wanted to explore other career paths. Sometimes your parents weren’t proud of it but they supported your decision.
After a few minutes of strumming the instrument, you stood back up to get a new guitar pick. It was time for a new one— well that’s what you told yourself but you just loved shopping for new things. Reaching for a red and green one, another pair of hands reached for the same one.
“sorry.” glancing up at the voice, you see a boy maybe around your age, with brown eyes and brown hair as his cheeks turned a little red at the intersection
“no that’s my fault sorry, go ahead it’s all yours.” you gestured towards the pick.
“no, my mom raised me to be a gentleman. please take it.”
“i-“ but the tall figure cut you off
“please i was looking at another one anyways.” he looked down at you
“thanks, sorry again.” you softly grabbed it as he smiled gently at you before picking up a solid navy blue one
You didn’t think twice before you went to go pay for it and took off out of the store carrying on with your day.
The next day, you sat under a tree strumming your guitar just letting the nice weather hit for once. The shade of the tree helped you relax not being blinded by the sun. You were so busy strumming the instrument you didn’t realize the figure walking towards you.
“guitar pick girl.” the familiar voice called out making you stop in movement, the boy from yesterday. he was walking towards you wearing a Brown sweatshirt and sweatpants
“hi.” you softly introduced not knowing you would be seeing this boy again
“I’m sorry, i know it’s weird for me just to walk up like that and rude for me to not know your name. you left too quickly yesterday i tried to-to get your name but you were gone.” he played with his fingernails as he spoke
“sorry.” you smiled apologetically not knowing why this boy who you totally thought was cute was suddenly approaching you
“no worries,” he rocked on his feet “i-im Conrad, Conrad Fisher” he stuck his hand out to you and you lifted yours off the guitar
“y/n y/l/n” his eyes seemed to immediately remember the future
“how long have you been playing?”
“my whole life basically. you play?” he nods
“yeah just not too long ago maybe like a summer or 2, my mom wanted me to learn a song for her.”
“that’s sweet of you. you must be a mamas boy for the two times you have mentioned her talking to me.” you grinned at him
“yeah.” he sadly smiled and you didn’t feel like pushing him to ask about what it was all about “do you mind if i sit? you look like you need some company.” he gestured to the grass next to you
“all yours.” conrad then sat down next to you criss-cross
“what year are you?” he played with the grass that was in front of him
“junior, what about you?”
“sophomore.” you nodded and you both went silent but it wasn’t a bad silence, it was comfortable
“could i take you out sometime?” your eyes drifted over to conrad and his eyes went wide “sorry! i didn’t mean to come off so strong, i’d just like to get to know you better.” you looked down at his hands as they played with the grass faster and you put a hand over his to stop his movements
“i’d love that.” his eyes went to your hands and his visible relaxed
“i just thought you were really pretty yesterday.” that sentence made you blush and look down biting your lip
“i thought you were pretty cute too, conrad.”
1K notes · View notes
v1olentdelights · 6 months
Text
When the Party is Over
Tumblr media
Conrad Fisher x sister!reader TW: crying and hinting at Susannah's cancer Summary: When your emotions are too overwhelming Conrad is there to help. a/n: this is so short but I didn't know what else to write! I'm sorry, I hope you enjoy it! Also why does the summary sound so stupid?
It was supposed to be a simple get together, maybe a drink or two with some loud music. But what started as a good night, turned sour and you weren’t even sure why. You were fine, completely lost in the music and the drink in your hand. And then you weren’t. Everything was just too much, you had been stressed about the upcoming school year, about your mother, and having to say goodbye to both of your brothers as they went off to college. 
It was your hope that you could just slip away out to the porch alone and have a few moments to recollect yourself before flagging down one of your brothers and asking them to drive you home. As you sat on the porch swing, you had your legs pulled up to your chest, cup in the hand that was holding your legs together and your hair was pulled out a little looser as you hoped to avoid a headache later on. 
It seemed that one of them already had that in mind. You were granted a few moments alone before someone came out to join you. They took a seat next to you on the porch swing. Conrad rested a hand on your knee, he always seemed to find you. Resting your head on his shoulder you let out a heavy sigh. To anyone else it may seem that you are practically begging someone to ask you what’s wrong, but to Conrad, he knew it was simply you letting down those emotional walls. But the tears that began to stain his shirt were also a tell. 
“What’s going on, bug?” The simple statement made your chest feel like it was caving in, because you didn’t know what was wrong. There were so many things to make you stressed out but none of them were making you upset at the moment, of course they affected you but they weren’t the problem. 
“I don’t know.” Bringing your free hand up to aggressively wipe away your tears. “I don’t know why I am the way I am, Connie. I just don’t understand what I am feeling and why I can’t just compartmentalize or something. Because it hurts, and I don’t know where to put everything that I am feeling right now.” Now your face was red and your heart was beating a bit faster, it was like your body wanted to make you feel worse. 
“Lay it on me. I know how you are feeling, and I can’t give you advice because I am still struggling. But share it with me. Because I don’t want you to get lost in your hurt.” Another huff of air left you, and it felt as though he did take the weight right off you. You knew it would take more work than that to let it all go, but he was right, as your brother often is. So you nodded your head in agreement. Then you sat there for a little while, the music still playing and people’s laughter in the background. 
“Let’s go home, I'll call Jere on the way back and let him know. We can make some tea and we can just hang out.” His voice was quieter this time, but just as sure as before. He slowly got up trying not to shake the bench too much, then holding a hand out for you to take, he helped you up and over to his car.
67 notes · View notes
kamaluhkhan · 8 months
Text
ours are the moments i play in the dark
pairing: conrad fisher x fem!reader
summary: you come back to cousins beach after a few years away. conrad is not particularly happy that you're back - and you aren't particularly thrilled, either. too bad there's a history (chemistry?) neither of you can deny.
warnings: ANGST (im so sorry in advance...); flashback is from conrad's POV and the rest is from reader's perspective; mentions of sex + losing virginities (nothing too detailed/graphic); reader has an ex who's referred to with gender neutral pronouns; reader and other characters drink alcohol (pomegranate margaritas ;) ); hints of alcoholism (reader's mother); jealous reader who's trying her best; pining conrad who's a bit of a jerk; reader and conrad fight A Lot (they will make up eventually i promise!!)
tags: @stargirlsirius-recs, @ifilwtmfc, @qwertyb2577, @allnrsnz, @baconeggndcheez, @peanutbelley, @imogen-skye, @geekinthefuschiahair, @tvije, @drikawinchester, @maybankslover, @junnniiieee07, @elcpsstuff, @fangirl-kimora, @redbierd, @starkeylover
a/n: thank you so much for all the love on my conrad series so far! i love these characters and writing their stories, and it means so much that others are enjoying reading my work. there is one more part left and i promise it will be happier so stay tuned :)) i haven't watched the last two episodes of season 2, but i'm planning on writing a bit for that, too!! thank you x infinity ♡
part one | part two
Tumblr media
i lost a friend / like keys in a sofa / like a wallet in the backseat / like ice in the summer heat (finneas, "i lost a friend")
now — summer, age 18
“you know, you guys aren’t fooling anyone.”
“and what exactly do you mean by that, steven?” you challenge, taking another sip of your soda. 
it’s the fourth of july and susannah invited you over for her annual celebration. susannah always hosted fun parties, so you were more than happy to accept because it meant eating some good food, listening to an upbeat playlist, watching some fireworks, and just relaxing. essentially, susannah always delivered the best of summer, rolled into a carefully planned event. 
the sun was shining, and everyone was having a good time, including you — at least, until you saw conrad and nicole in the pool, engaging in some serious PDA. you immediately got out of the pool and went to sulk near the drink table, where you were happily alone until steven came over to join you.
“i’m just saying, man. you and con are definitely going out of your way to prove that you’re mad at each other,” steven explains. “but we all know how much you care about each other.”
steven is right about the first part: you and conrad had done your best to avoid each other since the incident at nicole’s party and its fallout. if you and jeremiah had planned to go surfing and he invited conrad, you would always back out at the last minute. if you were over at the fishers helping belly pick out an outfit for a date with cam, conrad would conveniently stay in his room. not to mention, any time the two of you did cross paths — which was rare, but jeremiah and belly were persistent in requesting that all five of you spend time together, like the old days, they would say — it resulted in meaningless, petty arguments. the two of you had always been competitive and very comfortable teasing each other, but the difference was that now, your interactions were no longer good-natured.
you thought steven, belly, and jeremiah hadn’t noticed, but you should have given them more credit. to anyone who knew you, it was pretty obvious that something was up between you and conrad, even if they didn’t know what exactly it was.
“there’s a thin line between love and hate. and right now you guys are that line.”
“thank you for your insight,” you say sarcastically. “be sure to include that in your college essay — i’m sure princeton would love to have you.”
steven rolls his eyes at you, just as nicole arrives at the drink table.
“hey guys,” she greets. she reaches over to grab two cans of peach iced tea before you stop her. 
“conrad’s allergic to peaches,” you say. “so you might wanna get him something else.”
nicole looks at you for a second before nodding and reaching for a can of sprite instead. 
“thanks,” she says as she walks away. 
once she’s gone, steven gives you a pointed look.
“what?” you scoff. 
steven just shakes his head. “love and hate,” he muses, leaving you to join his parents and shayla near the pool. 
you then decide to go inside briefly, where you find belly and jeremiah, pouring vodka into a blender.
“we’re making pomegranate margaritas!” belly exclaims, practically giddy. 
“well, you gotta use the good blender for that.” conrad seems to appear out of nowhere from behind you, instantly reaching for the aforementioned good blender and placing it on the counter.
you were already in a sour mood from seeing him with nicole earlier, but belly looks at you with hopeful eyes, and you remember what steven said earlier, so you mentally promise that you would play nice with conrad. you owe belly and the others that much after being absent for so long: a carefree summer, just like the ones you used to know. 
you imagine that jeremiah sent conrad a similar pleading look because, miraculously, you and conrad don’t argue with each other as you help mix pomegranate margaritas for everyone. you actually engage in playful banter and laugh at the other’s jokes. you even feel sorry for him when his father, who wasn’t supposed to be here, walks in. you can feel the good mood slipping, so you suggest heading to the beach for a change of scenery.
belly had invited cam and a few more girls who are doing the debutante thing with her, and with steven bringing shayla and conrad bringing nicole (which, you are totally fine with, of course, especially after a pomegranate margarita), you had a pretty solid party forming on the beach, away from the adults. 
of all people, belly suggests some drinking games. it’s all a blur of sand, laughter, and vodka spiked fruit juice. once you were all the perfect amount of tired and tipsy, the group settles down, and gigi suggests a different game.
“we should play truth or dare.”
“oh my gosh we should!” belly smiles, tapping your leg enthusiastically. “remember? we used to play it all the time!”
you smile back. “of course i do.” 
when you were kids, you, belly, steven, jeremiah, and conrad would play truth or dare any chance you got. it was never very serious, mostly goofy pranks and harmless questions. you had all grown up since then, and somewhere along the way, truth or dare had become less innocent than it used to be.
“y/n,” one of the debs — dara, if you remembered correctly — turns to you. it was the first time your name had been called, and in all honesty, you were perfectly happy just sitting back in the sun and sipping the rest of your drink. “truth or dare?” 
you choose truth, mostly to avoid having to get up from your very comfortable seat on the sand.
“are you a virgin?”
your mouth suddenly feels dry. you’re not ashamed of your answer, but it doesn’t help that you can see conrad glaring at you from the corner of your eye. you take another sip of your drink before answering. 
“um, not really.” 
“it’s yes or no question,” nicole says. 
“then my answer’s no,” you declare.
“what?” belly screeches. she sits up straighter to turn towards you, and in the process spills some pomegranate margarita on her dress. “i can’t believe you had sex and didn’t tell me? when? with who? what was it like?” her cheeks are slightly flushed. a sober belly would have likely asked you in private, or at the very least, not in front of people you barely knew. in that moment, you almost regret the pomegranate margaritas.
almost. because maybe it’s the silence and everyone’s expectant stares, or the adrenaline you feel from winning most of the drinking games, or the effects of the drinks themselves, but you convince yourself that it’s as good a time as any to tell the story. a sober you would have known to tread more carefully given the context; that would have been about three pomegranate margaritas ago, though. 
“it’s kind of a cliche story, honestly,” you start. “it happened last summer. it was raining that night, so we were hanging out in the back of my teammate’s van, just talking, and one thing led to another….we didn’t plan to do anything, but we got caught in the heat of the moment.” you choose your words carefully, deliberately avoiding eye contact with conrad.
“how was it though?” belly asks, leaning in closer.
you shrug. “a little awkward, i guess? neither of us had sex before then, and we were both figuring stuff out. like, he couldn’t open the condom wrapper because he was so flustered, so i had to help him. it was nice, though,” you admit. “when the rain cleared, we went out to stargaze and fell asleep on the beach.”
belly sighs. “so romantic.”
“you’re right about it being cliche,” steven laughs. he has an arm thrown around shayla, and uses the other to gesture towards conrad. “conrad, man, that sounds almost exactly like your first time.”
you feel your entire body heat up, and it's not because of the sun shining down on you. conrad’s gaze finally meets yours — for a split second only, but it’s enough for steven to notice. 
“holy shit! it all makes sense now!” steven exclaims, suddenly standing up.
jeremiah frowns, looking between you, conrad, and steven. “what makes sense?”
“i’ve been trying to figure out why y/n and conrad have been so weird around each other this summer, but it’s obvious now: they lost their virginities to each other. they had sex!”
nicole stiffens and narrows her eyes at conrad. “you told me you never hooked up with y/n.”
“well, that’s definitely not true.”
“belly,” you warn, looking over to conrad once more. his cheeks are turning red, and you imagine a storm brewing beneath his dark blue eyes. 
“i don’t know about last summer,” belly continues, completely oblivious to the tension building. “but i do know that they kissed at your party.”
“i knew it,” nicole scoffs, pushing away from conrad. “i knew it.” with one last poisonous glare towards conrad, she storms off.
conrad sends you an equally poisonous look before chasing after her. the party dissolves shortly after.
feeling defeated, you lie back in the sand, close your eyes, and let the sun shine down on you once more, taking deep breaths to slow down your heart rate.
call it karma or a cruel twist of fate or just a really shitty coincidence, but you’re finally the one left alone on the beach.
then — summer, age 17
conrad was more than a little surprised to see your name appear on his phone. it wasn't like you were completely off the grid — you texted, though infrequently, and followed each other on socials. he scrolled through his instagram feed and saw the occasional picture of you wearing a costume at a halloween party or sipping hot chocolate on a snowy day. photos that never quite fit the image he had of you in his mind: in cutoff denim shorts and a swimsuit and layers of sunscreen, with sand in your hair and popsicle stains on your lips.
“hey,” he answered after only three rings. 
"hey fisher, any friday night plans?"
he told you he was working on his college essay.
“homework on a friday night in the middle of summer,” you tsked. “i never realized how much of a nerd you are.”
conrad laughed. “i mean, that’s on you for just realizing that.”
 “fair enough,” you hummed, and conrad could practically hear your smile through the phone. “if you’re in the mood for something more fun, look out your window.”
conrad wasn’t quite sure what to expect, but you standing in the driveway of his summer house was pretty low on the list. you waved at him frantically, telling him to hurry up and open his window.
he was still in awe as you climbed through. conrad tried to memorize the image of you then and there, standing in front of him in his bedroom: wearing dolphin shorts and a light jacket, with chipped turquoise nail polish and a bright smile.
"you drove all the way here?" 
"well, they haven't cracked the science behind teleportation yet," you say playfully. "so i didn't have many options."
"i can't believe you're here," conrad smiled, and that’s when you finally hugged him. he held on tightly, afraid you would leave at any moment if he let go. you smelled the same, like chlorine and vanilla sugar.
once you broke away from the hug, you pointed towards something behind him, pinned to his bulletin board. conrad followed your gaze and felt his cheeks heat up.
“i missed you, too, connie,” you teased, eyes lingering on the newspaper clipping of your swim team making it to nationals thanks to your record time. 
“mom showed it to me,” he explained, the smile on your face making his heart beat out of his chest. “she’s so proud of her little mermaid.”
your smile fell, just a bit, but enough for conrad to notice a shift in your mood. you always did a good job at hiding the weight of the world on your shoulders, at least around the others. not so much around him.
you sighed and sat down on his bed. “you know, after that swim meet, my dad lectured me about not being fast enough,” you explained. “winning by only a millisecond apparently wasn’t enough to impress college scouts, at least according to him.”
“your dad’s a jerk,” conrad said instantly. he sat down next to you. “and an idiot, if he can’t see how amazing you are.”
“thanks, connie,” you whispered. it looked like you were going to say more; instead, you picked up his laptop. “wow, you weren’t kidding when you said you were working on your college essay. you really are a nerd.”
“shut up,” conrad laughed, nudging you with his shoulder and trying to grab the laptop from you.
you nudged him back. “it’s a compliment! schools go crazy for trust fund nerds.”
“yeah, yeah.” conrad waved you off. “so, you’re in cousins for the summer?”
all you did was smile softly and close the laptop, finally handing it back to him.
conrad’s heart burst with joy. because not only were you there — finally there, after all that time away — but you were staying. his mom would always muse about summers in cousins being magical, but conrad didn’t quite believe her until you were gone and he felt that magic fade away. 
“do you wanna go downstairs? belly’s watching it happened one night with my mom and laurel.”
“as much as i love susannah’s favourite movie,” you started, and conrad’s heart soared again at you remembering his mom’s favourite movie. “i thought maybe it could just be the two of us tonight? maybe we could go for a drive.”
that’s how the two of you ended up at mermaid grove — a secluded stretch of beach about an hour away from your houses. it was near the mall your mothers sometimes went to, and during one of those excursions when you were young, all the kids wandered off and found it. the only time you’d been there was during the day and with jeremiah, belly, steven, and your siblings, so it felt different then, at night with just the two of you.
it started raining on the drive over — which only took 45 minutes without traffic — so you were hanging out in the back of your van. the van actually belonged to one of your teammate’s cousin who was somewhat of a hippie, you said, which explained the smell of weed and bohemian decor — battery powered rainbow fairy lights, colourful pillows, an elaborately patterned tapestry. the space was definitely intimate, or maybe it felt that way because you and conrad were sitting as close as possible to each other, shoulders touching and one of your legs tangled with his. he was scrolling through the pictures on your phone of your last swim meet in california, where you'd gotten the chance to visit stanford, while you were peeling an orange. 
"you would love it there, connie,” you gushed. you dug your fingers into the orange peel, and the smell of citrus started to fill the air. “the beaches are beautiful and the waves are amazing. it’s like, always summer.” 
conrad sometimes felt like summer was the only season of the year that he was truly awake, truly living. everything else felt like a dream, one that he would always describe to you in mundane detail; conrad even kept a small journal throughout the year, writing things down that he needed to tell you once you reunited every june. but one journal had turned to two, almost three, and conrad was trying really hard to not resent you for that.
“anyways, i think i’m going to apply in the fall.”
conrad stopped scrolling through your phone, pausing at a picture you had taken of a lemon tree. “doesn’t your dad have princeton lined up?”
“you make it sound like he bought my way in, when it was actually hours and hours and hours of training to get that scholarship. on the national best swim team.” you mimicked your father’s patronising tone for that last part; conrad hadn’t seen him in years, and he could still recognize it. 
“you’re right, though. my dad would flip his shit. even if i got in with a scholarship, it’s so far away and i have the twins to look after, but a girl can dream, right?”
“i feel that,” conrad assured. you gave him a sad smile, knowing that his dad was as intense about football as yours was about swimming. the worst part was that you both loved your respective sports, until they became a burden. you both had other burdens to deal with, too, when it came to your families. 
“in an ideal world, the two of us wouldn’t have to worry about anything else. we’d live in a place by the beach, surf every day, and hang out in the sun while sipping ice-cold, fresh lemonade.” just like we used to, conrad added in his head.
“in an ideal world,” you agreed. “we’d also adopt four dogs, each named after one of the beatles. you can teach them how to play the guitar.”
conrad laughed. “if i couldn’t teach you, there is no way i can teach one dog, let alone four.”
“well, they wouldn’t get distracted by your dreamy blue eyes like i did.” you winked at conrad, and handed him the freshly peeled orange before he even had time to blush.
“take it,” he protested. “you drove all this way — you should eat something.”
you shook your head and placed the orange in his hand before you pulled out another fruit from your bag. “i picked some of these up on the way here — best peaches on the east coast.” you took a big bite. “remember the summer we found out that you had a mild peach allergy?” you asked, juice dripping down your chin. you wiped it with the sleeve of the varsity jacket you wore.
conrad laughed at the memory. belly and steven had brought back candy from their trip to toronto. conrad practically inhaled an entire bag of fuzzy peaches, and didn’t realize that they weren’t supposed to make your mouth itchy — the “fuzzy” part wasn’t literal. that felt like so long ago, but there you and conrad were, settling back into each other like no time had passed.
as the night grew darker, you and conrad shifted closer to each other. conrad ate orange slice after orange slice as you devoured your peach, all while looking through the photos on your phone. you’d occasionally interject with a short story or comment, and there were still raindrops falling on the roof, but for the most part, there was nothing but a comfortable silence between you. 
you moved to wrap the orange peel and peach pit in a napkin, just as conrad swiped onto a photo of someone kissing your cheek.
“who’s that?”
you leaned over to check. “oh. that’s sam.”
“are you dating?” conrad asked, trying to seem casual about it. just a friend asking another friend about their romantic situation. as a friend. 
“we were,” you explained, sitting back next to him. “they broke up with me a few months ago.”
conrad sighed in relief, which he hoped you didn’t notice. “sorry.”
you shrugged. “it’s fine. apparently i’m emotionally distant.”
that wasn’t much of a surprise to conrad. sam might have been an idiot for breaking up with you, but they were spot on with the emotionally distant part. out of all the time you’d known each other, conrad had only seen you cry once, maybe twice. you were usually the one wiping away tears and putting on a brave face, inadvertently, or maybe purposefully, hiding your own vulnerability. 
still, that wasn’t something conrad was about to stir up.
“what? you?” he joked instead.
“shut up,” you said, rolling your eyes, but the wry smile on your face gave you away. “how about you? broke any hearts this past year?”
conrad thought for a moment. there was aubrey, who his football teammate said had a major crush on him. they had been texting for a while now, and were on the edge of maybe becoming something. but then, there you were, stirring up feelings conrad had long buried — or, at least, tried to. if part of his head was always in summer, then part of his heart always belonged to you. 
“no.”
“got your heart broken?”
he thought back to a few weeks ago, when he ran into your mom at the grocery store, and she said you wouldn’t be coming to cousins again that summer. you hadn’t spoken at all to each other for a month or two before that.
“no,” he lied.
you hummed, and took your phone away from him. 
“wanna hear something trippy?” you asked suddenly. you always had a knack for changing the course of a conversation to where you wanted it to go.
“what?”
“well, since it takes a while for light from space to reach us, when we stargaze, we’re actually looking back in time. like, the star that’s closest to earth — other than the sun — is four light years away. or is it five?” you paused. “anyways, if the sky was clear and we could see that star, it would mean we’d actually be looking at that star from summer, five years ago.”
“very trippy,” conrad agreed. “it’s like a cosmic time machine.”
you hummed. “do you ever wonder what our past selves back then, at like 12 or 13, would think of us now? i think about those summers and how magical they felt.” 
magical. you turned to smile at him softly, and conrad couldn't help but agree.
“i always thought you’d be my first kiss,” you whispered. 
that threw conrad off guard, and it took him a few seconds to regain balance. the van suddenly felt too small and the lingering scent of fruit shared between you two, mixed with the familiar smell of chlorine and vanilla from how close you were sitting to him, became overwhelming. his heart was beating out of his chest — not because he didn’t feel the same way, but because he did.
conrad knew what his 13 year old self would think of him now: he’d be up in arms over his awkward pause, screaming to finally tell you how he felt then, and how those feelings hadn’t really left. how you made him feel safe, excited, confused and angry. how there was a space in his heart just for you, and it was painfully empty when you left, but now that you’re there again —
“sorry,” you said, cutting through the silence. you subtly shifted away from conrad. “i didn’t mean to make things weird.”
“you didn’t,” conrad answered instantly. he registered how you were now slightly hunched over and brought your knees to your chest, how you bit your lip and avoided eye contact — a few hints that you felt uncomfortable, deflated even at his lack of response. 
so, he moved closer to you and gently placed a hand on your knee. 
“you didn’t make things weird,” conrad assured once more. you were brave, he decided: for a lot of things you did, but right then for being so honest, so vulnerable. it inspired him to do the same. “i mean, this might make things weird, but i always thought you’d be my first…you know. at least, ever since i knew what sex even was.”
you finally turned towards him, your lips slightly parted. 
“yeah,” you breathed. “me too.”
conrad’s eyes flicked to your lips, then back to your eyes. 
“do you still want to —”
“yes. i - i mean, no pressure, but if you still want to —”
“i do.”
you smiled then and conrad felt himself do the same. 
when you kissed for the first time, it was like rainclouds parted and the stars came out, shining bright in infinite darkness. the two of you became tangled up in each other: you sat in his lap, legs on either side of his waist, your chests pressed together and your fingers tangled in his hair, which drove him crazy. conrad let his hands explore your body, gently grazing the skin under your shirt. his lips tingled from the remnants of peach juice on yours, but he kept kissing you. 
it was awkward and exhilarating at the same time. you asked each other if what you were doing felt good and right and were slightly embarrassed if the answer was no, but still adjusted if needed. at one point, conrad was fumbling with the condom wrapper and you had to open it with your teeth; he jokingly pointed out how you used to do the same with packs of sour patch kids and you giggled before kissing him again.
the two of you lay down on the floor once you were done. your head rested on conrad’s chest and he had his arm around you, idly tracing shapes on your skin with his fingertips. he craned his neck down to look at you.
even in the dim lighting and after years apart, you looked the same. even if you’d never been that close before, at least not in the same way you had just been, you felt familiar. 
you tilted you head towards him and smiled. 
“what?” 
there was something about the way you looked at him that still made him blush, and conrad hoped that with the lack of bright light, you wouldn’t notice. 
“sounds like the rain stopped,” he said. “wanna go stargazing?”
it was slightly chilly, so you let conrad borrow your varsity jacket, even if it didn’t fit perfectly. the sky was clear and full of stars. you spent the rest of the night there together, on the beach. 
in the morning, conrad woke up before you. he watched as you took slow, deep breaths with your eyes still closed. you looked so peaceful — until the sound of your alarm prompted you to wake up.
“shit,” you exhaled, your eyes wide once you noticed the sun had risen. “what time is it?” 
you searched frantically for your phone, only to find it right next to you.
“shit,” you repeated once you checked the time. you stood up right away, sand kicking from underneath your feet. “this is bad.”
“what —”
conrad didn’t have time to even ask you what was wrong because you bolted to the van. he followed you.
“what’s wrong?”
you looked at conrad, brows furrowed. “i have to go. i don’t want to leave you, but i have to go.”
“it’s okay,” conrad reassured. he stepped closer to you and placed a hand on your cheek. “i’ll be here when you get back.”
“i’m…” you step away from him. “i’m not coming back.”
“what do you mean?” he tried to steady his voice, but a dangerous mix of hurt and anger threatened to wash over him. conrad’s heart dropped, knowing all too well what was likely coming next, but he hoped, wished, that it wouldn’t be like before.
“i’ve got a swim meet in boston,” you exhaled. “but i can drive you home on my way there.”
“you’ll come back to cousins after,” conrad declared, as if saying it out could change what would happen next. “you said you’d be here for the summer.” 
you shrugged, stumbling over your words. “technically, i didn’t say that. you just assumed and — ”
“and you wanted me to believe it, right?”
you closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “just — let me drive you home, connie.”
the use of his childhood nickname — the one he secretly despised, except when it came from you — was what made him snap.
“i should have known,” he snarled. “god, i should have known. you don’t care about me, about us. swimming over everything, right?”
“that’s not true.” your eyes opened, but you still wouldn’t meet his gaze. “i do care, but you know the pressure i’m under —”
“fine. you want to talk about pressure?” conrad laughed, bitterly, all his frustration bleeding out and pooling at your feet. “my mom had cancer, and you couldn’t even be there for me. texts and phone calls only do so much when you’re watching the woman who raised you wither away to nothing.”
your eyes softened slightly, finally looking at him. you took a step forward, but conrad took another two back. 
“conrad —”
 “no. don’t,” he snapped, making you stop. “why did you even come here?”
“i was close by and…” you paused. “i guess i just needed to come back, even just for a bit.” 
"figures," conrad scoffed. “you only care when it’s convenient.” 
“that’s not true,” you repeated. 
conrad waited a second for you say something more, but you didn’t. 
“well, i’m really glad you got what you needed,” he mocked. “tell me, does nostalgia and sex help you swim faster? impress college scouts? make daddy proud of you?” 
you stiffened slightly. “don’t be an asshole.”
“no, no. congratulations!” he clapped to emphasize his point. “i’m so glad i could help you! guess you just needed a quick fuck before your big competition for some good luck. hope it works out in your favour.”
there was so much venom laced in his words, and he could tell you noticed. you looked at him like he was a stranger. 
“fuck you,” you finally said. your voice was shaking slightly and it looked like tears were forming in your eyes. “you can walk home, for all i care.” 
without another word, you got into the car and drove away. conrad watched your car become smaller in the distance as he stood alone at the beach, wearing your jacket and replaying every word he said.
now 
it’s hours after susannah’s fourth of july celebration. the adrenaline and alcohol from early wore off, and you’re sitting on your front porch, sipping tea from your favourite mug. you were hoping to relax, but the sight of conrad fisher storming up to you threatens that.
“where do you get off, saying what you did earlier?” 
even under the low light of the porch, you can see that his face is red with anger. he came here to argue, but you’re too tired to really care.
“well, shit, conrad,” you sigh. “don’t blame me. blame — blame truth or dare and pomegranate margaritas and steven for being so goddamn perceptive.” 
“you lied,” he accuses, crossing his arms. “you said you didn’t tell belly about us kissing at nicole’s party.”
“at least i didn’t lie to my girlfriend,” you point out, your voice dull from exhaustion. conrad is momentarily at a loss for words, furrowing his brow even further, so you decide to steer the conversation in another direction — away. “look, i just had to pick up my drunk mother from the bar, so i’m really not in the mood for this conversation.”
you move to leave, but conrad grabs your left wrist before you reach the door. the sudden action startles you, and you release the mug you were holding in your right hand. it falls to the ground, the break clean, and the rest of your tea spills onto the porch. you exhale sharply, turning back to face conrad.
“i don’t care,” he snaps. “you fucked up earlier today. you never should have mentioned that night. talking about it like it actually meant something to you.”
“you know what, conrad? maybe it’s hard for you to believe, but that night actually meant something to me.” you laugh bitterly, feeling more awake than before. “and, yeah, now i’ve spent so much time regretting it. because maybe i hoped that we’d start dating, but even if that didn’t happen, i never expected to lose my best friend.”
conrad rolls his eyes. “i don’t know how you can stand there and call me your best friend. best friends don’t leave each other —”
“fine, i did leave,” you interrupt. your voice is slightly raised, and you can’t help but feel a new rush of adrenaline flowing through your veins. the fact that conrad is standing in front of you, suggesting that you were the one to blame for the hostility between you — that made you frustrated, angry, even. 
“i had other shit going on,” you continue. “and maybe i didn’t handle the situation well at first — that’s on me, sure. but i wasn’t the one who ignored texts and sent calls straight to voicemails. i’m not the one who’s spending the summer avoiding everyone who knows them because they’re too scared of others finding out the truth. i don’t know who you are this summer, but i know the real you, conrad.”
“no, you don’t.”
by now, you’ve walked closer, standing only a few inches in front of him. if you reached out, you’d be able to brush the bangs away from his forehead, but you don’t. 
“i do know you,” you assert. “in fact, i hate how much i know you. i know that “yesterday” by the beatles is your favourite song, and the first one you learned on the guitar. i know that you’re crazy good at chess, but let jeremiah win sometimes when your dad is watching. i know that you love playing football, but hate that you’re expected to play it. i know that i hurt you last year, so you had to ignore me because that was easier than admitting how you really feel because — because you’re scared.” 
“you’re wrong.” conrad stares at you, his gaze heavy on yours. 
you shake your head. “i know that you didn’t tell anyone about what happened between us because it meant something to you. and that really scares you, too.” 
“you’re…you’re wrong.” conrad’s voice wavers a bit, his eyes soften ever so slightly, and you know you’ve struck a chord. 
“i’m not,” you say. “and, honestly? i’m so fucking tired of waiting for you to realize that. i don’t care anymore. whatever was between us during all those summers, it's obviously not here anymore."
“you’re wrong,” he’s like a broken record, stuck on the same lyric. 
"stop blaming me for fucking this up," you continue. "it's your mess, too, conrad. and i’m so fucking tired."
it’s late, and it’s dark, and you can’t bring yourself to stay here anymore. without saying anything else, you step over the broken porcelain of your favourite mug and into your house, leaving conrad alone on your poorly lit porch.
when the sun rises and you go outside in the morning, the pieces are gone. 
796 notes · View notes
hallietblr · 10 months
Text
same time, next week? | c.fisher x reader
Tumblr media
a/n: inspired by the tiktok trend! might MIGHT turn this into a mini trilogy but not too sure yet so let me know what you think!
warnings: fluffy but kinda sad:(
summer was quickly coming to an end, saying goodbye to a few of our new friends we made this summer as they return back to their home. cousins was always a place associated with fun and the carefree life. from waking up at dawn to catch the sunrise, being at the beach all day, family barbecues, parties every night, and to do it all with my best friends.
my mother, elisa, used to come to cousins every summer with her family and she immediately became friends with the girl next door, susannah, and her best friend, laurel. the three of them would always spend every moment of the three summer months together in cousins before leaving back to their normal lives.
cousins was almost like an alternate reality, where everyone is happy. where summer love is born and new friendships are made.
once my mom inherited her parents’ summer home, we started coming to cousins every june until the end of august. just like how she used to do it when she was younger, it was to continue the family tradition and i hope i can show my children too.
luckily, susannah had also inherited her family’s summer home and was still in very close contact with her two best friends.
i basically grew up with conrad and his younger brother, jeremiah. conrad and i were born in the same year, only a month apart. we were destined to be best friends since we were in diapers.
i’m also very close to laurel’s kids, steven and belly. moreso with belly than i am with steven since her and i are the only girls out of the five of us. she was a few years younger than me and honestly, she’s like the little sister i never had.
currently, i was lounging on the beach chairs by the poolside of the fisher’s home. conrad had his head on my lap, quietly napping and enjoying the summer warmth. i had one hand playing with his golden hair while the other flipping the pages of my book.
jeremiah, steven, and belly were all playing in the pool, the occasion yelling and screaming coming from them. they all had smiles painted upon their faces,
“y/n! get in!” jeremiah yells at me, splashing water in my direction. i use my book to cover conrad’s face in hopes that he won’t wake up,
“maybe later!” i say back to him, “i can’t really get up right now anyways.”
steven shrugs, “just push him off.”
belly gasps and hits her brother, “that’s so mean! but seriously, y/n, i’m leaving the day after tomorrow and you leave on tuesday next week.”
“i know” i sigh, part of me knows that there’s a chance i won’t be back in cousins with my favourite people for a long time. with college coming up and moving across the country to go to stanford, i knew that i couldn’t visit them as often after this.
nobody except for my mother knew, and i made her swear to not tell a soul that i had accepted my offer to stanford. especially the fact that i won’t see them all for possibly years.
“kids!” laurel calls out from the window, “dinners ready!”
the three from the pool scream as they all shove each other, trying to get out of the pool quickly. i gently shake my best friend awake, “connie, dinner”
his eyes flutter open, he rubs the sleep away, “okay.”
he offers me his hand when i stand up, which i gladly take. i feel butterflies in my stomach from the physical touch from him.
conrad has a soft hand on the small of my back as he guides me into the familiar home. we all sit around the large dinner table, all passing the delicious looking food around. i have conrad on my right and jeremiah on my left.
“y/n,” my mom says, i look up to match her gaze. the second i do, i see what she’s silently hinting at.
tell them.
i shake my head, swallowing the spoonful of mashed potato in my mouth, “no, mom”
jeremiah lifts an eyebrow at me, “she didn’t even say anything”
steven nods in agreement, his mouth full of food. laurel and susannah both look at my mother, trying to read her face,
“come on, honey.” she pleads, “you owe it to them”
this caught everyone’s attention, all eyes on me.
“what’s going on?” belly asks, placing her fork down, “mom?”
laurel shrugs, “i’m not too sure, bels”
i sigh, putting my hands onto my napkin covered lap. i didn’t want to tell them, but i also knew that i should,
“i’m going to stanford.” i tell them, after moments of confusion and silence.
susannah jumps up from her seat and runs over to my chair to squeeze me, “oh my goodness, y/n! that’s incredible news! congratulations, sweet girl!”
laurel was right behind her, “awh, my second baby! i knew you could do it.”
“wait, so why were you so hesitant on telling us?” jeremiah says as he hugs me, “this is good news!”
i frown slightly, “it’s easier for me to stay there for all four years, rather than flying back and forth for the summer…”
it took them a moment to digest what i said before steven pushes his chair back from the table,
“no, you aren’t saying…” he pauses, “you’re not coming back next summer? or the summers after that?!” steven exclaims, “what about christmas?!”
i shake my head, “flights are too expensive, i can’t”
i look over to conrad, who’s eyes haven’t left me since i broke the news. his expression was unreadable.
belly had a tear running down her cheek, “so, tomorrow is goodbye then?” she whispers, “we won’t be able to see each other until you’re done…”
“yeah, tomorrow is goodbye” i slowly nod, “my mom is planning on coming to visit so maybe you guys can too?”
jeremiah grins, “of course we will! i cant stay away from n/n for that long, i can barely handle a school year without seeing you!” he laughs, even though there’s evident sadness in his words.
“i’ll be sure to bring connie and jere to visit, honey” susannah promises me, “congratulations again”
i smile at her before everyone resumes to eating their food and making small conversation. i look back at conrad who’s playing with the food on his plate, i grab his hand under the table and squeeze it.
he looks at me and i ask, “beach after?”
dinner wrapped up quickly, steven and jeremiah getting ready for one last party of the summer — conrad and i agreed to go a bit after them.
conrad has his hand wraps around mine as we walk down towards the water, our arms are swinging while he laughs at some joke i made. we sit on the sand and watch the sun slowly lower into the horizon. we don’t say much but it’s never needed when it’s us two. we enjoy the comfortable silence and each other’s company.
i rest my head on his hoodie covered shoulder, him resting his head on mine soon after. he kisses my hair softly, “so stanford?”
i sigh, “yeah, stanford”
i can feel him smile, “congrats pretty girl”
my cheeks blush at the nickname, but i say nothing. all i want is to stay here with him on this beach we grew up on, forever.
“i always love the sunsets here,” i say, finally breaking the silence, “i swear they’re so much better here than they are in maine.”
he laughs, “i think i like them better here, because then at least i can watch them with you. back in boston, all the sunsets remind me of you.”
“you’re so cheesy” i giggle, gently shoving him with my shoulder.
he rests his cheek on his crossed over arms that are on his bent knees. he looks at me with sadness in his eyes, “same time, next week?”
i feel my eyes starting to water from his question, fully knowing that we don’t know the next time we’ll be able to do this, “im not here next week” i whisper out, tears crawling down my cheeks.
conrad has never been much of a crier, i think i’ve only seen him cry three times in my life. but right now will add to that count as a few tears fall from his eyes,
“im going to miss you so much, pretty” he tells me with his lips quivering, i reach over to wipe the tears off his face with the sleeve on my sweater.
“we can call anytime, okay?” i reply, giving a sad smile, “we always text each other too, but whenever i want to hear your voice, i’m going to call you.”
he chuckles, “so i guess i’ll be calling you 24/7”
i move closer to him and he wraps his arms around me into a tight hug.
“i’m not sure what summers are going to be like without you, y/n.”
“i don’t even want to think about it”
as the sun disappears beyond the horizon, we slowly get up to head back to our rooms to get ready for this party. my phone was blown up with snaps and text messages from jeremiah and steven, begging us to come and join them. one last summer party with them, one last chance to watch steven get black out drunk, one last opportunity to say goodbye to my summer friends, and only a few more sunsets to watch with conrad.
665 notes · View notes
grapejuicestyless · 9 months
Text
Can You See Right Through Me?
Conrad Fisher x fem!reader
Summery: You, Belly and Stevens older sister, realize that as everyone grows older, you have become less and less important. Suddenly, everything you’ve never felt comes crashing at you.
Tumblr media
The past summer and every single one before that had led me to this moment now. Standing alone in an empty room in the dark while everyone else ventured off to a bonfire.
It was like a switch had went off in my brain, coming down here this summer. Everything I knew becoming wrong. Everything I was so sure of becoming the unknown.
I thought I knew everything, but I knew nothing. I was wrong about everything.
The way Jeremiah’s eyes carried a special sparkle as my sister and brother piled out of the car in front of me. His lips curled into that same pearly white smile and his eyes crinkling in the corners like always. His wrinkles a permanent tattoo of his life and his happiness that he carried with him.
I knew Belly was pretty. She always had been. I’d been the one to express that to her. Being her older sister, even by only a couple years, I could see it far before anyone else could. I could see how gorgeous my little sister was with her long brown hair and her contagious laughter. She would grow into herself, I promised her that and I couldn’t have been happier watching as she found that new confidence in her appearance the older she grew.
Still, the joy I felt for her could not overpower the sting that settled in my chest the moment I realized that Jeremiah’s warm welcome was not directed towards me like all the years before. His eyes drawn to Belly. The newer, prettier Conklin. The youngest, the most at ease with her surroundings. The one who took everything with a grain of salt.
And suddenly it made sense. If I was the stars in his eyes, then Belly was the sun. The bigger, brighter star. How could this boyish ray of sunshine fall for the more mellow sister when he had his perfect reflection right in front of him?
Realizing that was what caused the downward spiral, I think. That was the turning point and suddenly the switch went off.
I wasn’t ugly, I knew that. I once had a few boyfriends back home, all of which took great interest in me, but all of which never stuck. And it was obvious as to why. My head knew it would be good to try something new, but my heart was suffocating in the love I had felt for Jeremiah. I couldn’t love someone else if my heart belonged to another.
Only, Jeremiah’s heart belonged to Belly. It was obvious. The way they laughed. The way they talked. The way they touched. I wanted him to touch me like that. I wanted his arm slung around my shoulders and I wanted his hand resting on my thigh. I wanted him to whisper his secrets into my ears again. I wanted all of it, while Belly treated it like a chore.
Like she was bored by the constant affection and the strong attraction they had for one another. Yet, even with the heaviness in my heart, and the bitterness at the tip of my tongue, I wasn’t the one he was holding down on the beach. And that could never be me. I was the sister standing in my room back at the summer home, a bikini tied around my chest as a top, jean shorts hanging low on my hips while her fingers pulled at the skin on her stomach and pushed against her stomach to make it impossibly flatter.
A routine I’d developed since the beginning of summer. Sleeping in later, staying up longer. Skipping meals by accident and curling up as small as I could while everyone else ate dinner. It was almost as if I didn’t exist. And maybe I didn’t because it seemed like nobody cared.
That was my greatest fear. What started as a minor jealousy and a spiral of undiscovered insecurities morphed into a pool of fear. Not for how I looked, but for who I was. Now that everyone was growing up, now that Conrad and I were going off to college, would anyone still need me? Belly was confident now, she didn’t need my pep talks. My mom had her best friend and Jeremiah had Belly. Nobody needed me. Nobody cared.
Knock, knock.
Or I thought nobody cared.
“Hey, Conklin?” The voice was quiet, afraid to pierce the peacefulness of the silence.
My hands slipped away from my body, my posture straightening and my eyes making friends with the ground.
“Oh, hey. Aren’t you supposed to be at that bonfire with the others?” I didn’t make a point to turn around, staying stuck in place. “I didn’t want to be there.” He confessed.
“Oh.” His eyes caught mine in the mirror. Body leaning against the doorframe and hands playing with his tied hoodie strings.
“Besides, it’s boring without you there, you know? Don’t really enjoy being there without my beer pong partner.” We laughed, my eyes averting his quickly while it died down back to a comfortable silence.
Footsteps treaded across the furnished wood floors, socks padding carefully, closer.
“Hey.” The call was gentle and not in the slightest bit pushy or pressured.
I bit my lip, feeling suddenly naked with Conrad so close. My arms came to wrap around my torso like a blanket to shield my most vulnerable parts of myself.
“Hey, no. Come one y/n. Don’t do that. Don’t hide.” His hands found mine, covering them in his warmth, pulling away at each finger that dug into my skin slowly. Pulling off that divider I’d placed between us.
His head found my shoulder. His chin tucked comfortably on top of my shoulder blade, his arms hugging around my body, loosely, but enough to relay that he was there. He was close.
“What’s going on with you?” I felt his eyes looking at me, even from the floor. I shook my head.
“Nothing.” I lied through my teeth.
“I know you better than that, Y/n. You’re my best friend.” I nodded, feeling the tears piling on my waterline until everything was a watercolor version of itself.
“You avoid everyone but the moms and me. You don’t surf in the mornings anymore. You skip dinner to go be by yourself some more. You’re dropping weight scarcely quick. This isn’t like you. Something’s bugging you. Why can’t you just let me in?” My response wasn’t something I planned. His confession something I wasn’t prepared for. The low gravel of the mumbles. So quiet and normal that it was like he never even said it. But I knew he had because there he was, looking over my shoulder to watch me through the mirror. Admiring each part of what I had to offer like it was gold. How could I have been so blind to how much Conrad cared? How his touches lingered longer than before, how he cared for me like Jeremiah once did.
A sob wracked through my body, lips parting and chest heaving as I crumbled beneath his touch. My hands grasped onto his arms, clawing at him in panic. Trying to hold onto him. He let me hold onto him.
He lowered us slowly to the ground, his breath fanning off of my face and his body giving mine a home as I curled up impossibly close to him. Still it wasn’t enough. I needed to be closer, to not be alone. To not feel like the world was constantly out of reach.
It was beyond Jeremiah and Belly. It always had been. It had only been my wake up call to how quickly things were moving and how soon I would be unimportant. How soon I would be alone.
Conrad didn’t try to shush me, or talk to me. It was like a silent conversation, confirming all his suspicions. He always knew me better than myself. He always knew there was something wrong deep down. He always saw right through me.
I saw right through me.
It was hard to tell when the tears stopped and turned into dried out cries muffled into the collar of his shirt. Who knows how long ago I became dehydrated. But Conrad stayed put, sitting with me silently until my last cry came out in a soft sniffle.
Lifting my head, I looked to him, a mess. And I saw he was crying too. His eyes were just as wet as mine and his cheeks streaked with past tears. His lip didn’t quiver like mine, but Conrad was always better at holding it together.
So, he didn’t sob like me. No, instead of breaking down like I had when our eyes met, he pulled me in. And he didn’t let me go no matter how hard I squirmed. It was like he breathed me in. And suddenly, in the moment of silence, I heard a whisper against my hair. Only a short sentence, but one that meant everything. One that made me feel less alone as I realized Conrad felt the same way.
“Help me hold onto you.” He begged.
And suddenly, everything I was insecure of, everything that I had let slip, seemed unimportant compared to the boy on his knees for me.
683 notes · View notes