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acidmatze · 2 years

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"The axe forgets but the tree remembers" is so important. Like... my parents and my brother scoff when i say i dont want to have any contact with my brother whatsoever

"Pfff okay but I dont know what he has ever done to you"

Maybe YOU forgot but I remember very well when

I as a literal toddler would scream and cry for mom to help me when he would beat me up upstairs. My brother being 18 at that time. He's 14 years older than me. "Oh but all siblings fight sometimes!" would be my brothers go to excuse. Yes, when one is like 10 and the other 6. Not when one is an adult beating up a toddler. And i KNOW she could hear me cuz later she would complain about me "talking too loudly". And if she can hear me talk in my room upstairs then she would hear screaming just as easily. I will never know why she chose to ignore me. When my brother would lock me in the basement or in his room in the basement and wanted me to program his stupid computer. He was reading out code at me and if i wouldnt be able to type quickly enough he would sneer at me and hit me.

The relief i felt when he joined the military and wouldnt be at home for weeks and i could finally exist without fearing to make any noise or else he would barge into ma room and grab me and drag me away cuz he wants something. Or he would just hit me. And somehow even when he was away, everything was always about him at home.

How when he was at home and my friends were over he would pretend to be all friendly and funny and silly and scold me later for flinching when he addressed me. "Why are you flinching? Are you stupid? Why are you doing this, your friends will think im hitting you! How dare you make me look like a bad guy in front of your friends!"

When he finally moved away and for a blissful but short time my mom acknowledged that i also existed. Before i would only exist to serve my brother by letting him do whatever stupid shit he wanted to do and drag me around and lock me up and say Yes to whatever he says. Even if it was benign stuff like helping him cook, I was NEVER EVER allowed to say no. Keep in mind I would be like 6 years old. I was never ever allowed to do my own stuff, kids stuff. Not when my brother was around. I was simply a tool or some shit. To come running when he called. To do whatever he says. But after he moved away for a short time I existed as a person in my moms eyes. Until he started having "issues" with his wife and child. (The "issues" being him hitting my nephew and abusing him and later his daughter too and his wife not wanting that) Ofc my brother never does anything wrong ever so his now ex-wife was the Evil Evil Witch of accusing him of doing those terrible things even though i WAS THERE. I was literally just sitting there, witnessing him hitting his son. When we were over for a visit i would play with my nephew and my brother would excuse himself to go to the bathroom and then Barge into my nephew's room and just smack him. And then hit him again if my nephew started crying (ofc he would cry, he was like 7, are you noticing a pattern yet?) "Oh but Marcel used to be such a bright young boy I wonder what happened to him?" would my parents lament when later my nephew wouldnt talk much, not participate in many things and just withdraw from everything all the time. Oh boy gee i sure wonder what happened! Its probably completely unrelated to my brother beating him up all the time! Thats a mystery for sure!

How later as a young adult i would retreat to my room when he showed up cuz if i would leave my PC he would just waltz in there and fiddle around with it and "repair" it and you know for sure nothing will work after that. When i was at my bff and knew my brother would be over i would even call mom before and beg her not to let him use my damn computer because hes breaking it every time without fail. And every time, also without fail, when i would come home mom would gleefully announce that my brother absolutely did went into my room, snooped through everything and then went on my computer, deleted stuff he didnt agree with me having and "repaired" things that werent broken before but now sure were and nothing was useable anymore. How he was pissed at me having a PS2, 3, 4,etc and I shouldnt have stuff that he also doesnt have even though from early on i had to pay for everything with my own money while he would have stuff thrown at him.

How always, always, always, everything would be about him. Everyone's lives were supposed to revolve around him. If he is around, how dare we not talk to him and him only, how dare we discuss our own lives. How dare we HAVE lives of our own, dont we know we only exist to make him feel good about himself? We are just NPCs to him, pretending to be people having a life but in reality we are only there as tools. Every time anyone of us would.. you know.. have a life that exists completely seperated from his own he would rope that person back in. "Silly you, pretending to be a human. Only I am a human, dont you know that? No one of you is a person, only me."

#blablabla #and every one of my friends who ever met him told me the same thing #in his eyes they dont exist as people #no one does #he is the only Person in his world

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that-one-weeb-but-it-transformer · 2 years

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How they hide there identities + dating headcannons pt2

at request of a lovely reader here's part two

Optimus

last time we left off he had told you about being a giant robot and you were angry but glad he told you rather you figure it out

so like...now what? You just live with that secret till the day you die?

like...yeah pretty much

You're good with one human form robot man from another world, you don't need five more

"You...don't want to go meet them?" "Are you asking me out of curiosity? Or are you asking me because they're like family to you? Truth be told I think you in my life is one robot enough Orion-well should I say Optimus Prime" "You're not gonna let that go?" "Sweetheart its been a week give me time."

but he kept pestering you- well not pestering- it was like very sweet pestering, like a child trying to warm up to a new friend almost.

But you kept to your word, its one of the reasons he loves you so much, keeping to your word. You thought about it

"Just...do they really want to even have a human around." "We have five around usually." "oh...well shit I guess why not then, could have led with that a few days ago."

The next day you were going to ask him when you should come over and "meet the family" but he just disappered.

Not a word or a call

"Remember alien human robot...probally saving humanity...is there robot chicks? Is that a thing? No. No he wouldnt cheat...but I'd guess I'd understand if he wants to be with his own- okay I need to cook to get things off my mind."

Four days later he comes back, exhausted, and theres dishes everywhere.

"What happened-" "Orion? Is that you!?" "Uh. Yes dear-"

You hugged him so quickly, "I thought you were hurt." "Long mission is all...whats with all this food-" "I panic cook...wanna help me give some to the neighbors?"

He gladly helped you give the dishes away and then fell onto the couch

"Surpise?"

You saved his favorite dish. "Might be a bit cold."

"It's going to unfortunately stay that way."

He lays down with his head in your lap as your brush fingers through his hair, he's so exhausted

"So I was thinking....about your family." "Mhm..." "i'd like to visit them when you guys arent so busy."

Smokescreen

so last time you stormed out of the base and took the two-hour-long walk back to town- wonderful

He wants to apologize so bad but they made him stay in for the rest of the night

but bright and early he's waiting outside your house waiting for you to come out for school.

oh you come out, but as he walks up to you another guy out of nowhere does

"Aw, man did you see the UFC Fight last night n/n! I lost 50 bucks on that fight!" "I told you not to bet on him didn't I?"

You completely ignore him, and he's devastated

Not to mention this guy has a sporty car as well.

The last thing you need is to deal with a well you didn't know exactly what species smokescreen could be labeled under at the moment

but smokescreen waited on your steps the whole day for you to come home

and then you come home just to have an argument with you

so you left him out there to think about it and it was really hard for him because you trusted him so much during your relationship

but then, out of nowhere, Optimus picks you up

which is fine, because god damn you need to talk to someone that understands this

did he basically become your father in one talk in a way? Maybe.

so there you guys are walking through a forest

"I wanted to come and apologize for my teammates doing." "Oh. No. no need really!" "I also wanted to make sure you are alright, to hurt a human in any way is never our intention."

You guys had a super serious talk, you told him it's not about what smokescreen is or was or whatever, just the fact that he lied to you through like everything and you figured out like a brick wall in your face.

You really do miss smokescreen through, and probably scream into your pillow each passing day

probably broke more phone screen protectors than you can remember from looking at his number than throwing your phone

"I hate feelings!"

until you just do it, what do you have to lose anyway? certainly not your virginity (okay i need to chill with the jokes-)

Bro, he's at your door in a heartbeat, like he's been sleeping at your door.

Jack helped him buy you flowers.

"These are for you!" "are....are those tulips?" "uh...yeah! I think so! It's a bit hard to memorize all earth's- that's not the point." "Smokescreen I'm allergic to tulips,"

he swears he just wants to cry, already ruined his first chance

but you guys take the whole night talking things out, situating everything, he tells you all about him, and you fill in anything he didn't know about you

"Any major major things that might shock me?" "Not to big...but" "You said but that's never a good sign" "Yeah those Decepticons that you know...we're at war still...yeah...because you like... know us...they could go after you."

BRO, okay your calm your calm

"So what do I do?" "there's nothing you really can do except...have me on call which uh...you've probably had enough of me by now, sorry about that..."

You explain to him it'll take a few days to get your head wrapped around it and he's like okay, he's upset you enough

and you're slowly starting to text him again which, yay.

So even though it's like really slow, you guys kinda are poking at each other again

And you gave him a house key so...yay

and then you guys kissed again so YAY even if it was after a long time, he's just so glad to hold and kiss you again

he's also glad you let him into your bed to sleep (like actual sleep), he loves holding you

Bee

Last time he had come to apologize to you covered in mud and your chores done for the day and you let him knowing that both of you were okay as you let him shower and washed his chlothes

You let him borrow your bigger chlothes for now and you both sat on your bed

"So...your still mad?" "Oh absolutely." "Fair enough"

So you ask him more and more questions about him and his people, his planet

He answers all truthfully- you think and hope atleast

He tells you about everyone in his team and where he stands. As well as everyone there going against, who's bad who's good

"You ever feel like teetering?"

He's pretty shocked by that question

"No" "okay cool. Don't think Im suppose to date the villian anyways. Though the villian complex is compleling-" "I'll be a villian if you want!"

You have to stop him from making to rash of statements

"If you want the villian I'll be the villian!" "Bee! Please! I love you just the way you are!"

Wait- Love?

"You...love me?"

Oop

"Pfft...I mean......" "You might you love me!" "....maybe..."

How can you not love him, how can anyone not love him tbh

Magnus

you don't know if you're exactly bullying him, but feel like you do by well, doing almost anything

this man has so much anxiety about the two of you now it makes you feel really bad

like you can feel him stare at you longingly while you're "Asleep" like he's scared to touch you even.

"Magnus, I'm not gonna leave you. and if you want me to go meet your family, then I'll go meet them-" "No! I- mean. No. that's not needed."

you sometimes wonder if it's anxiety or stress. He told you about his place within the Autobots so you understand that he's kinda scared to lose such a high place, and lose all honor.

"if you get kicked out you can come live with me?" "Not helping." "Sorry."

You're even considering ending it, its not a healthy relationship for either of you, you went from seeing him every day to him being so scared in a way, that you've seen him stand outside the house from the window from coming back that he just leaves again

Turns out you'd both not be alright after all

"I think we should...well...not do this anymore." "Y/n-" "Don't think because I don't care about you. I do love you." "I don't understand-" "You will one day." "I-" "Magnus please leave."

Ah yes another heart breaking story

Crack out the cheap wine.

Here comes knockout to kidnap you on the way from the drug store.

Your so heartbroken by your own decision that your pretty much drinking as you're being kidnap

"Ugh! You're a cybertroian or whatever the hell your called!" "Yes-" "god your pretty but theres only one car for me! Hic! Actually! He's a truck! Hic! Can you believe it? I fucked an alien from another planet. God did he fuck so good!"

And here comes the tears, "But his hugs were the best and I broke it off so why am I crying!" A pause for another heavy drink, "It's been what? Almost 24 hours now!? Im such a wuss!"

Knockout finds you somewhat relatable yet annoying.

Your definitely his favorite prisioner.

You were still drunk when they came to save you, it was within a few hours after all.

"Ah! Magnus! I missed you so much! Do you know! If you don't eat while drinking, its like. Horrible for your stomach! Glad I ate that lunchable last night. Mhmm...what a good oreo cookie" "okay y/n we gotta go." "You know what!? You're leader can go fuck themselves! If they dont let you be in love with who you want they suck!" "Y/n. Have respect for Optimus-" "is that his name!? Fuck you Optimus! I love my dork! Mhm! He seems nice! You know besides the- hey...when did you get a new paint job. Purples not really your color..."

This is extremely embarssing

Luckily you passed out on his hand before anyone got to you, and then was asleep in his seats

You think you're doing bad?! He was doing even worse, he was basically wired the whole time, taking every task into his own hands, and was more cranky than usual. Wheeljack and him arguing more than usual

But Magnus took you home and it seems he wasnt the only one who through himself into work to try and combat, history books everywhere, artifacts, and your open laptop, you were most likely writing a report when you went drinking by the sight of two empty bottles of wine on the table.

"Mhmm...is that you mags?" "It's me Y/n." "I missed you." "I missed you too."

He gave you a nice warm bath and changed you into Pjs. You might have been black out drunk but you still held onto him tight in your sleep

That moring you woke up to the smell of eggs, and painful headache.

Then comes in your boyfriend- ex? We dont know okay

Magnus handed you a full scottish breakfast

"Is this black pudding!?" "Yes."

Your in love all over again, well you never fell off but still.

"Mhm how'd you know how to make this?" "I found one of your books. Who ever wrote that has impeccable handwriting." "My dad wrote that book. Its all of my moms and mes favorites." "I hope i did a good job." "Better than I remembered..."

Akward eye contact and flustered faces

"Im sorry If I hurt you." "No...Optimus and I talked about it. It made sense. Thank you. For caring." "Yeah...but if I cared so much I would of explained rather than...uh...rather than just run like that."

Fuck it you only live once, your both making out like nothing happen.

"Mhm- hey watch the breakfast." "Is is that much better than me-"

Oh no. Dont bite into the black pudding, and he's gaging.

#transformers #tfp #transformersprime #tfp headcanons #optimus headcannons #tfp optimus prime #bumblebee tfp #optimus x reader #smokescreen #ultra magnus tfp #tfp humanformers #x reader #tfp x reader #tfp x reader headcannons #x reader headcanons

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sikereviewdotcom · 4 years

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strawberry shortcake s2 ep1 - horse of a different color

this one was suggested by someone who couldnt keep their mouth shut and not sing the strawberry shortcake intro theme in the middle of our economy class

no one wanted to hear that, but they went ahead and then i actually followed up on that train of thoughts i remembered about the fucking cartoons and i knew it pronto: its a must-see shit its like slightly above the level of magical school bus series, but the final rating is for the fin not the beginning so lets begin this horseshit:

were reviewing “horse of a different color”, it focuses indeed on strawberrys horse, honey pie pony (its her entire damn name, how sweet right? like all of them, i got diabete from this review but its the cost of maintaining this blog anyway, the kids are playing together on a that tree having fun jumping around like chimpanzees hooba hooba but sadly our filly quickly realizes she cant play king kong with them and keep falling on her ass,

yet since theyre all retarded or young (id say its a fifty-fifty case for them kinda normal ig, i mean they ARE literal 6yo) they try several ways of getting her up on that tree, not thinking how to get her down if they ever were to succeed (good for them: aint happening) its child labor too btw, from an horse still same deal what if honey pie fell down on them? crushing them corpses with her mighty pounds? the findus company would be delighted to hear such news, im sure its some quality (sweet ass) horse meat

once it all fails she understands a horse isnt meant to climb a tree, too big too fat its four legged, not even entertaining the relationship giraffes have with trees

but it aint over, then (after a talk with herself) hp hears the laughters of a bunch of kids which catches her attention, it always does who can ignore that sorta noise? although she aint annoyed by it shes just into the idea of riding a bike now, shes even gonna get a go at it oh yea thats it we finally found her human hobby gogdamn shes a backward furry

of course it fails aswell since she has no hand for the handle and shes heavy so i guess its the reason why she rides into w/e and cant stop? because otherwise she couldve also just.. actually it makes no sense does it? i mean she couldve easily stopped the ride actually how is that kid bike even holding her? ive never tried putting a pony on a bike for 6 y/o but i doubt about its capacity in not being crushed aswell as i doubt in the kids bones not being severely damaged after a visit under honey pies horsy buttcheeks

but all of that really makes her sad: she cant play with her human friends and shes the only horse around strawberry land or whatever see me tearing it for her, theres so much emotions in this episode especially after that filly trynna get kids to get into some horseplay horseshit like dude theyre only 6, lets go easy on them, might have a problem with the parents of the kids watching this episode no one even thought how fucked up this one part is? sure horseplay isnt only sexual or w/e but it still is the visual of 6yos on all four jumping around and neighing together with their ass a little bit too exposed wow im going on a dangerous road here? aint i? not gonna sue the writers im sure it was their subconscious speaking probably got issues from their childhood, eventually got them sorted out since 2004 what do i know? aside from me not caring

back on track : after seeing horsey being so sad the kiddos decide to get her a horse friend but where the fuck? they got no idea, they are proud nonetheless and go tell honey the good new until they are like “wait but we have no idea where to find horses!” ofc we get a big reveal, some serious strawberry shortcake lore: actually all the horses, ALL OF THEM FROM THE ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET are on one (1) single island: ice cream themed to diversify it all they are just chilling over there in ponyland and for some reason this one here got lost or idk guys she took the boat and checked the rest of the world out as an even younger filly, found strawberry and her friends and decided now she was a centaur slash humanrry furry human, idk you get it but shes their friend and so on to introduce the concept of an AWESOME island full of equestrian activity and ofc ice cream but its kinda lame because who cares? everythings already made out of food, also why isnt the ice cream melting? its one water? nevermind for the introduction as i was saying, hp sings an horrendous sounding song it deteriorated my ear drums they got pierced or something or maybe im exagerrating? either case horses cant sing:

so to the ice cream land they go, huh

of course it wouldnt be a big adventure without an almost broken bridge oh no whatever shall we do? could we possibly cross it safely? lets try it out guys: yay it worked good for us little stress and suspense it was wack how they got honey pie out of the hole her big ass hoove made im mesmerized by the power of friendship and sugar at this point, just in full awe for the rest of the episode probably over dosed on all the ice cream flavoured horseshit, i got some all over my mouth its dripping on my desk i gotta clean that later

next thing we know: horses its all this episode is about (aside from labor) but you see, so far hp would switch between normal human language and neighing well turns out her other fellow equines can only neigh and so they just neigh together while our english well-spoken mammal translates to the moronic kids who just smile smuggly

of course the animals are having a welcome party then, dancing around while the morons are just bored, harsh one being a cartoon character isnt it guys? w/e theyre gonna ask for honey pie to come back home now, convinced that her natural habit isnt her place and she loves them too much to just leave them and never come back and break any plans they ever had together- oh shit looks like shes leaving forever huh? what a plot twist mark that on the bitch quota for today

the first one to leave is the little boy btw, important thing to note: hes the biggest pussy he cant even face reality: oh no, no more pony back time before sleep thats quite a bummer, downer and man how are they going to survive now they got no animal to watch over them? jesus theyre soon, on the boat (idk where they got it from idk why suddenly theyre on a boat because then theyre once again gonna cross that bridge but ok) anyway yea theyre having a relationship crisis during that ship trip yada yada ah and the bridge, because (see i do not call them morons for now reasons obviously they deserve this title not only because theyre 6 but also because they are just daft:) they proceed, once in the middle of the bridge all 4 of them, to stop and wonder

“will the bridge be able to hold all of us? wont it break? damn i wonder if it will crack” and they talks without moving until vlam: a tree comes and breaks it (dont ask) so now theyre in trouble:

back to ponyland: bitch pie realizes how much she misses her actual friends and that she can speak english which her other horse friends cant do so she is special and probably abnormal, shes a big outcat of the pony society and has no other reason but to escape her incoming death sentence for fraternizing with the humans of course none of the second part is true, she just wants to see the kids again so she says asta la vista baby to the neigher team and runs away see, she hasnt taken the boat and yet also arrive to the bridge? why a boat sequence then? i will skip this for now but it WILL play in the rating, imagine im the parent of the youngster watching this crap and i have to endure it

if it sucks this bad and is this illogical i might just get bored and change the channel, idc my progeny aint gonna be watching this in either case, ill make them watch political debates then interrogate them on what they learned after what but it wasnt actual political debates just random furry youtuber venting with their fursona sprites animated and thats how you make your kids retarded, the kick of this joke is that i aint planning on getting any kids but totally gonna make them watch classics too such as the attack of the killer donuts as soon as they reach 6 so they wont be dumb and probably not getting diabete or w/e in their adulthood

then honey pie saves the kids btw all of them, heavy shit

and they all go back to strawberryland, happily after a big “wow i missed you sm, you are my real friends w/e if you dont look like me i aint speciest guys really!” theyre all vegan too btw so this works for them i havent watched enough strawberry shortcake episodes to know if they ever eat meat but i have doubts seeing how theyre into a very cannibalistic diet which include eating dessert when obviously thats what they are at least half part, this cartoon raises a lot of political questions it may have a deeper value than i first attributed to it

the end: another terrible song plays about horseshit and how tasty it is

thats all folks

so the rating: big 6/10, so you know 5/10 if its a decent kid show where im highly eager to click on the x and get back making jams but nah

surprisingly enough, i only wanted to stop watching half of the episode and not the entirity of it so credits for thats since im an adult and not a kid, imagining kids enjoyed this sweet childish cartooness or w/e now why +1? its because of how many political questions it raised, how it made me think about our society and cakes yknow its more than kids having a conflict with an horse it talks about veganism, specism, handicap, cannibalism, the management of the limited ressources were exploiting and so on yea really makes you think, its subliminal messages to make kids smarter: they watch their dessert-imbecile counterparts doing bs and then get it right irl: good ah- it also makes it better for you when youre watching this with your kid, you suddenly transcend to another level of spirituality, existential crisis activated or at least reasoning mode or w/e youre willing to name this the point is you arent bored still despite all of this i rated it quite low for such a serious kid cartoon what couldve possibly made me tic? 1) kids are morons and cant understand all of this, not clear enough for the targeted public 2) projection onto the characters/dialogues from the writers of their childhood traumas (the horse play event didnt go unnoticed, karren brown) 3) my little pony ripoff 4) its controversial, our society, especially in 2004 couldnt understand the depth of this shit and finally 5) i got so much ice cream flavoured horseshit all over my desk god help me this is so filthy what a fucking mess i would totally recommand it to anyone who feels like being blown away by the statements made in this work of art 6/10 but really we all know in the future, itll be a 9/10, some ahead-of-its-time-crap

tg, out

#strawberry shortcake #cartoon review #cartoons #sike reviews #child labor #pony labor #art #classic #diabete fuel #reviews

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