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sunnysidewrites · 6 years

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Best Friends to Lovers!Seokmin

HAHAHA THAT’S RIGHT FOLKS!!!!!! I PULLED THIS SHIZ ON YALL!!!1!11!! this is part 2 of seokmin’s bday present. and yes i know im over a month late leAVE ME ALONE!! THIS IS THE FIRST BULLETPOINT AU OF 2018!!! AND YES ITS AT THE END OF MARCH!!! FORGIVE ME CHILDREN!!!! i had SOOOO much fun writing this but maybe a bit too much bc i think i went overboard,,, but i cant help it that he needs so much love!!!

this is THE. LONGEST. BULLETPOINT. AU. I’VE. EVER. WRITTEN. it has definitely surpassed assassin!cheol pt 2 by a long shot and im a little concerned honestly bc i go OFF whenever i talk about my biases, especially the underrated ones. (wonwoo, you’ll get your turn one day wait for me bby)

happy bday to my sunshine pt 2. i love you so much that words will never be able to express it, even as a writer who writes as a hobby and has to Put Things Into Words. you’ve been such an amazing influence not only on the members, but also on carats and other diverse fans. i’ve always believed the saying that the brightest smiles hold the most pain, and i may not know all of your struggles, but i know how much you have to hide behind this idol front. we love you unconditionally, so please keep shining for us. also allow yourself to be sad and other negative emotions, but there must be darkness in order for the light to be appreciated, right? thank you for being the ball of sunshine we so deeply love. 💕💕💕

warnings: might give you diabetes on how soft and sweet i was feelin!!! as a double bias, it is hard to give everyone equal love so this is the 1 time i could fully dive into it!! also seokmin is a flirty and jealous drink sipper

Part 1: Be There In Spirt

Seokmin was your go-to for anything and everything

Whether it was to find a movie buddy or seeking advice, he was always there

You first met him at some social event your friend dragged you to

“So you can talk to more people!” Your friend would respond when you asked why

You really didn’t care much, if at all, for parties unless someone you’re acquaintanced with was also there

Your friend was too occupied with other people, so you just grabbed some food and juice and settled yourself in the kitchen

Someone entered the door and you could hear the volume of his muffled voice even from the other side of the door before he entered

You were just chilling at the countertop with your back to him and munching on your tortilla chips with salsa that you didn’t care who entered

He noticed that you were the only one there and you were eating and occasionally sighing mood tho

As he was opening his soda, he asked you pointedly, “is the food good, at least?”

You were startled and slightly jumped at the sudden sound of someone’s voice

You turned around to be greeted with the goofiest yet brightest smile

Is it possible to see that bright of a smile or one at all when someone’s drinking? Bc he definitely made it work

You just finished swallowing your food and merely brushed your hands and shrugged, “it’s pretty bland like this party,” which earned a heart laugh from the boy

“You got dragged here, too?” You nodded and cracked a smile. “What, was the whole antisocial ‘take refuge in food’ act a dead giveaway?”

He smiled and lightly chuckled, “that, and how you were muttering about getting dragged here as you munched on your chips,” he gestured to your now empty plate

“Hey, correction — I said that I was brought here against my will”

“Like that’s such a big difference,” he says with a smile on his lips as he finishes up his soda

“And it’s not every day that I meet a cool, tortilla-chip-eating person at a social, but maybe I would let myself get dragged out more often”

You kinda stared back at him and slowly blinked bc like

Was that a hint of flirtation in his tone or were you just that self-centered?

Maybe best of both worlds

You raised an eyebrow at him, “you want to see a loner at the snack table?”

“It’s easier to approach you or anyone like this, isn’t it?” He flashes another one of his infamous pearly grins and reaches in your bowl to steal a chip and pops it in his mouth

You jokingly say, “Oh, you think we’re friends now?”

He laughs throatily and puts his hands up in defense

“I think we’re past the stage of bonding over stale chips and salsa at this point”

And you’re cut off shortly when his rowdy group of friends interrupts the friendly banter y’all had rip :(((

Those darn cockblockers

“I’ll see you around, Tostitos,” he throws in a wink and gives you a short wave as he backs away from the door and leaves you as quickly as he entered

You shake your head and look at the sad, crinkled bag of chips and salsa

“Did he just nickname me after a brand of this stale party food??????”

What an iconic first impression tbh bless

Ever since then he would have this weird nickname system of naming you after foods you would eat to make fun of you or just joke around

“Cheer up, cheese puff!” ok this actually sounds kinda cute and now I’m soft :’(((

“Be there or be square, you pretzel”

You: “that didn’t even make any sense”

“Don’t be salty” ba dum tss

“Can you help me out, (peanut) butter cup?”

“Whatever you say, nerd...s”

“Okay you’re not getting any of my other candy then, seok”

He’s the only one out of your friend group — actually just everyone in general — to yell directly into your ear as a greeting

He calls it “cute”………………….. ok seok

But it’s ok bc he gives out the best hugs

Or maybe it’s just the best to you heheh ;)))

Invented!! Bear!! Hugs!!

The best ones that crush your lungs and you can barely wheeze out a breath

Your ideal hang out session with him involves screaming at the top of your lungs while playing Mario Kart and having a whole junk food feast sprawled out on the coffee table

“bRO YOU MADE ME SWERVE”

“GET OUT YOU’RE IN MY WAY”

Bonus: the chips and candy are also sometimes used to pelt at each other

It’s honestly more of a damn jungle when y’all are together it’s amazing LMAO

The type to crash at your place unannounced whenever he wants

You would open the door and he would just stroll in and look through your fridge like he’s lived there all his life

“WHY are you going through my fridge??? You need to go home, I have things to do today”

“Eh, we can just work alongside together—you’re running low on juice”

“Imma juice you boi if you don’t leAVE”

Your friend group most likely carries a pair of earplugs whenever you’re together

But underneath their rolling of eyes, they lowkey highkey ship the hell outta y’all

They even sometimes drop gigantic hints for you to get together but,,, things don’t exactly go their way

“Hey, Seokmin, my parents are having a barbecue this weekend. Maybe bring a plus one? Like uhhhhhh Y/N?” Real subtle

And he’d be like “what, Y/N??? Why would we need a plus one??? Aren’t we all going together anyways?”

The same thing happens on your end too smh

“My cousin is having a birthday party, you wanna come with? You can bring a date or whatever, probably Seokmin or something”

“Seok??? He would probably burn the place down HAHA but ya I guess I can bring him *shrug*”

And every time, both of you would ask: “but why (that other person)??? I can bring (insert another random member)”

GET A CLUE BABES!!! OH MY LORD

And they would just shake their head like sigh look at these naive kids

Mingyu: so are we just gonna let them be dumb like this orrrr????

Cheol: yeah let’s just leave them alone — nO THEY DON'T SEE HOW PERFECT THEY ARE TOGETHER WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING I’m with u on that one cheols

So this is the O Great Seungcheol’s plan: make each other jealous without knowing y’all would get jealous

A foolproof plan, amiright folks????

And what other cliche perfect way to do that than a WEDDING

it just so happens that Seokmin’s aunt is conveniently getting married and he’s inviting the whole crew

And the guys are like mwHAHAHA THIS IS PERFECT

Everyone’s talking about who’s bringing who as a date and things like that and you’re just chilling and scrolling on your phone

And everyone’s making eyes at each other without you knowing bc they’re like ok y’all time to initiate I Still Get Jealous Plan

“how about you, Y/N? who are you taking?”

And Seokmin subconsciously wants to know too bc he’s tuning in with the rest of them LOL

And you don’t even bother looking up at your screen bc that’s how indifferent you are to this whole thing

“I don’t really care, I guess anyone who doesn’t have a date or something”

Seokmin is about to open his mouth and ask you since that’s your usual thing

BUT SHOCKER!! SOMEONE BEATS HIM TO IT!!

“How about going with me? I don’t have anyone”

And you expected Seokmin to say those words, but you look up and see Jeonghan smile at you

THE LOOK OF B E TR A YA L ON SEOKS FACE DID THE TEMPERATURE JUST DROP BC IT IS C O L D IN HERE

Admittedly, you feel a little odd going with someone who’s your best friend and go-to for everything but hannie is your friend, so you don’t mind too much

So you’re like “o-oh sure that works”

And you steal a glance at seok but he has an unreadable expression and is smiling like usual

And for some reason you feel your chest drop just the slightest bit bc you thought he would at least fight for you a little bit and say something like

“heY HEY Y/N IS MY GO-TO FOR THESE THINGS”

But he doesn’t at all,,, and his lips looked a little strained when he smiled

and jeonghan is looking all slyly at seok bc he knows just a minute ago he could feel the back of his head being burned off by Seokmin’s glare

The convo picks up from where it previously left off and things are back to normal but the atmosphere is a little heavy

The day of the wedding comes and you’re about to finish dressing up

You’re waiting for half of them to pick you and meeting the other half at the venue

And ofc, in this half includes seok and jeonghan yikes

You hear your doorbell ring, and you’re like oh they’re here!! You say bye to your parents and put on your coat and shoes

When you open the door, you find yourself in front of Jeonghan and he’s like holy crAP

He’s awestruck and is looking at you like :OOOOO

“Jeonghan! Uhhh,,,, do I look weird???”

And he snaps out of it and is violently shaking his head like nO NO N O ofc not you look amazing

And you’re like heck yea I do I spent time looking this good :)))) (you don’t actually say this but it’s a thought)

and you get a funny feeling in your stomach and you realize you’re anticipating what Seokmin would think

If you got a good response from your “date,” surely your best friend would say smth good too??? Right??? That’s how this works???

Little did you know Seokmin (and everyone else) witnessed what happened and they’re like oMG Y/N LOOKS GOOD

Seokmin couldn't help but feel it should be him in Jeonghan’s shoes but he couldn’t refute the fact that you did indeed look like a million bucks

As you get in the car you lock eyes with him and you’re like hey Seokmin!!!

But you’re instantly b l o w n away by how CRISP HE LOOKS

His brown hair that’s usually sitting down and hides his forehead is now slicked back but in a way that still stands up and exposes more of his forehead and outlines his masculine face shape

His sharp suit perfectly fits on his toned body and you’re fully convinced you’re looking at an angel

YALL KNOW WHAT LOOK IM TALKING ABOUT. YOU KNOW.

You have to actually hold back a squeak bc you’re shook af

And he’s dying bc of how cute you are and wow are his palms sweaty???

You end up sitting in the middle of him and jeonghan and you’re just sitting happily and waiting to see what kinda food is at the wedding lmAO

but the real meal here is you eh??? Eh??? ;))))

Seokmin seems a little nervous and tense sitting next to you looking that good like he’s actually a little intimidated

You’re waiting for him to speak up and he’s clearing his throat and stammering a little bit

“Y-you look really nice, Y/N”

And you’re like ahahahhahhdgdhhhcjdbdhhd

“Thanks, seok, you clean up really nicely too”

And both of you can’t look each other in the eyes bc you’re gonna actually combust if you do

And everyone in the car is looking at each other like hehehhehehehh it’s workinggggg

When y’all finally arrive at the venue, you get out of the van with the help of Jeonghan’s hand

Seokmin: conceal don’t feel :))) channel your inner Elsa man :))))

And jeonghan is glancing back at Seokmin every so often to test him

And Seokmin is starting to catch on like ,,,, why is hannie always looking at me

He tests him even more when he casually holds your shoulder and drapes his arm around you

And Seokmin is like !!! ELSA WHERE ARE U

Jeonghan is being a little too touchy in seok’s eyes and Seok is silently fuming over the drinks

Soonyoung is like dude I can feel your dark energy all over my soup what’s up with you???

Seok is about to explode at this point and anything can set him off

“isn’t Jeonghan being just a little too touchy-feely with Y/N? That looks like borderline harassment. They’re not even dating!”

And soonyoung is silently laughing bc he’s like oh you fool lmao

“You sound a little too overprotective over your best friend. Well — if that’s really the reason why you are”

“Of course I’m just worried — dID YOU SEE THAT ARE THEY FEEDING EACH OTHER”

Soonyoung: u need help bro

“Steal a dance with her later” soonyoung says and seok is like uh what Im not gonna make a fool out of myself

All soonyoung does is shrug and winks and he goes back to eating

Soon enough the dancing portion begins and jeonghan takes you out to the dance floor

And it’s nice bc you’re just having pure fun and dancing goofy moves, not to mention Jeonghan is great company

But you’re a little disappointed you and seok weren’t able to talk and have fun the way y’all usually do

Jeonghan has sensed this the whole day and he says “I’ll be out of your hair soon enough”

You’re taken aback by his statement and you’re like “what no you were really fun to be around tonight!!”

And he laughs and ruffles your hair like “no need to cover it up. I knew this would provoke him” and you both look across the room where seokmin is standing alone, sipping on his drink as he pretends he wasn’t just looking at you dancing for the past ten minutes

The upbeat song transitions to a slower song and jeonghan pats you on the shoulder

“Here’s lover boy’s cue ;)))” and he bends down to your ear and whispers

“But I could stay here longer and mess around with him a little longer”

You push him away laughing and say “let’s not torture the poor guy any more than you already have”

Both of you are laughing and SURPRISE SEOKMIN APPEARS

and he claps his hand on hannie’s shoulder and says “May I?”

And jeonghan nods and looks between the both of you and is all ;)) have fun kiddos and winks at you right before he leaves

And now there were only 2

You didn’t realize you would be so nervous until your heartbeat nearly spiked up when he came into contact with you

DHHDHDJDJ SORRY IM FREAKING OUT WRITING THIS WOWIEURJ SCREAMS

It’s good I’m good we’re good this is good

His cheeks are tinted pink as he attempts but fails to make eye contact with you once again

He gently takes your hands and places them around his neck and then places his own around your waist

It’s only at this moment that you’re able to make proper eye contact for possibly the first time that entire day

You’re slowly moving to match the slow tempo and you can feel your face getting hotter in the heat of the moment

It stays intimate and silent for a few moments before the both of you try to break the silence

“Umm,,” “So,,,”

Androgen you laugh at how awkward you’re both getting

“This is probably the first time we’re not screaming for the whole area to hear”

He chuckles and nods slowly

“I think my breath is just taken away” he says so softly that the music could have drowned his voice out if it weren’t for the close proximity of you and him

and you’re like ??? By what??? Are you feeling ok??

“By you”

And you’re like bLUUUSSSSHHHing big time

“A-ah, stop it, I only tried to look a little more presentable today,,,,”

Jeonghan somewhere in the distance: that’s not what you told me this morning!!

“You always look beautiful no matter what”

And now you’re at a complete loss of words bc well how do you respond to your best friend who’s shooting compliments one after the other so easily????

You’re desperately trying not to melt into a puddle in his arms but it’s a little hard

“You’re charming as always, Lee” and he’s like ;)) ofc ofc

“You’re a good-looking fellow yourself, not just me. Have you seen the girls who were drooling over you today??”

He blankly blinks at you and shakes his head

“Well, I didn’t notice actually. All of my eyes were on you tonight,,,,,”

FUCUEHEYDH IM SCREWMJRN IM SC REA MIN F

You’re a full fledged tomato by now and you’re trying to bury your face in his chest so that you could save face from this horrid embarrassment

“Okay, tone it down, Seok,,,, I cant handle all of this complimenting for a night”

He laughs and pulls you closer to his chest, his grip on your waist a little more secure

“I don’t know where this is all coming from either, but now that it is, I might as well say it all”

“What was that drink earlier???”

“I swear I’m 100% sober rn ask soonyoung!! Anyways, I didn’t think much of anything when I first met you honestly, but looking back at it, I think there was already some bit of attraction since then”

“You liked me when I was eating chips and salsa??? Really???” You look up at him incredulously

“It may not be the most flattering moment, but it was cute how you were hunched over your bowl LOL”

You: lemme just DIE

“If Jeonghan weren’t your date today, I’m not sure if I would have ever realized this. Maybe at some point, but at a much later time. I think it would have consumed me anyways”

He notices you’ve gone quiet and he’s like oh lord what if I messed up omgofkfkkf

“So,,,, yeah,,, i get it if you don’t feel the same way,,, I don’t wanna make things weird if you’re uncomfortable knowing this,,, but it was made crystal clear tonight that I really like you more than a best friend. I think I always have”

And you’re breaking out into giggles bc you realize how dumb you’ve both been

And he’s like !!!???!!!! why are you laughing omg I’ve done it you think I’ve gone mad

“tbh Seokmin I was disappointed that you weren’t my date since you usually would fight the members if they asked me”

“I kinda thought maybe I’ve been forcing you to do it too much with me?? and the other guys and you can do whatever you want”

“Seokmin, we’re best friends i would have picked you in a heartbeat”

And he’s like skdjjdjh is it suddenly hot in here it’s just you ;)))

“But as for the feelings…… it is weird”

He’s like oh :((,,, yeah I knew it would be kinda weird—

“—that we’ve liked each other all this time and it took us this long to realize it through some dumb wedding date thing”

And his face immediately lights up and you’re about to clutch your heart by how pure he is :’))))

He almost blinds you with his smile and he pulls you in so that your slow dancing position turns into a hug and he’s giggling into your hair and is spinning you around

*INHALES DEEPLY* MY GOD SOMEONE PROTECT THIS PURE BUN IM GONNA CRY I LOVE HIM SM

You can't help but giggle with him since his laugh is so infectious and you’re both a bubbly giggling mess my lord I think I just got diabetes

Poor baby was deathly scared you were gonna reject him but he’s so relieved you didn’t!!! :’))))!!!!!!

He slowly pulls apart from the hug and you’re both looking at each other hesitantly, bashfully

and In The Moment all you’re thinking about is how warm and how right it feels to be in his arms

You’re both still in your hugging position, his arms wrapped around your upper back/shoulders and your arms around his torso

You’re a little out of breath because of all the laughing and spinning, and both his and your eyes flicker to the other’s lips

You’re not sure who leaned in first but the next thing you know, your faces are only centimeters apart, his hand on your cheek

And then you feel something warm and soft on your lips

Holy hELL, am I really kissing Seokmin???!!! You’re silently freaking out and it’s just like

Your brain: ⁉️⁉️‼️‼️⚠️⚠️⚠️

You can feel his smile against your lips as he lightly tugs you closer to him and engulfs you in his embrace

But your mind gets fuzzier with every passing second so you let yourself enjoy the moment

Until you hear distant cheering in the back

“yyyYYYEESSS WE DID IT BOYS FREAKING FI NA L L Y”

You and Seokmin pull away and look back like wtf is happening

Sure enough, the other 12 guys are whooping and cheering and you would have thought it was your own wedding

,,,,refer to husband!seokmin

Seokmin’s just like “wait y’all planned this???”

Jeonghan: ya it was so fun teasing you this past week lmao you’re welcome tho :))))

Seokmin: I’m gonna eat your share of ice cream for the next month :))))

And everyone’s just like “y’all literally took years to realize this you should thank us uhhh”

Seokmin’s about to open his mouth to spout out some more objections but you tiptoe to peck him on the lips to make him shut up

“eeeEW UGHH nvm I already regret doing this”

“Seungcheol I will eat your share of ice cream too”

On the ride back home, you’re both comfortably leaning on each other, your head on his chest and his on top of yours

You’re so worn out that you sleep the whole way back home

Bonus: the guys in the car are giggling softly and take secret pics

Extra bonus: they taunt you both and use it as blackmail but in reality they’re jealous and want you to use it as your phone wallpaper

Extra extra bonus: he gives you a goodnight kiss at the front of your door and the guys scream in disgust and hurry him to return home :’)))))

ICONIC COUPLE OF THE FREAKIFN CENTURY OH NY GODHD!!!!! I LOV!!!!! MY PURE CINNAMON ROLLS!!!!!

#write-svt #seventeen #seventeen seokmin #seventeen dk #seokmin #dk #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen headcanons #seventeen au #seokmin imagines #seokmin scenarios #seokmin headcanons #seokmin au #dk imagines #dk scenarios #dk headcanons #dk au #my post

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ihateeveryoneincludingmyself · 3 years

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i don’t think anyone I know irl has my tumblr so I’m just gonna vent here.

so in May I met this girl on tinder, and we hit it off super fast and we talked nonstop it was honestly pretty overwhelming because I didn’t remember what it was like to have someone into me. she was trying to move very quickly and I’m very emotionally unavailable so I didn’t want to get into a relationship with her.

we remained friends. super good friends. she even considered me her best friend which I didn’t even know she felt that strongly until we started to fight. thought I was just some dude she talked to when she wasn’t hanging out with her irl friends.

our first fight happened when I realized how deeply she’s into the awful college student drinking partying culture. to be clear because this is something she doesn’t fucking understand, I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH DRINKING! I DRINK, EVERYBODY I KNOW DRINKS!! but every week sometimes multiple times a week she would drunk text me random stupid shit like she couldn’t even spell properly and like she doesn’t remember shit in the morning you know like, actually fucking drunk. i can’t stand how people think that’s normal or okay. if you can’t control your drinking then don’t drink. if you can control, then have a couple drinks! enjoy yourself! BUT THERES A POINT WHERE YOU ARE DESTROYING YOURSELF. okay so here’s why I’m extra sensitive about this topic. my parents were alcoholics. also did heroin n shit but yeah I wasn’t allowed to live with them. and every time I see someone fucking wasted, it reminds me of them. i remember my grandpa taking me to restaurants to visit my parents and by the time we finished eating they were drunk. couldn’t even talk to them as a little kid. I lost my childhood due to alcoholism. i know this girl is just a college student partying blah blah blah but it can lead to worse and like.... seriously who the fuck wants to talk to someone who can’t even produce sentences? when you’re that intoxicated it’s simply not healthy even if I didn’t have trauma related to alcohol I would probably still be concerned. anyways, I progressively got more angry with her. i said a lot of things I shouldn’t have . i tore her apart in response to my anger. i hate myself for the way I treated her, but GUESS WHAT? she still doesn’t listen to me. still regularly getting wasted and it fucjing pisses me off because she goes around telling people that I don’t let her DRINK. LIKE SHES MISSING THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT!! IM GOING TO COPY AND PASTE EXACTLY WHAT I SAID BEFORE I GOT INTO DETAIL ABOUT THIS: I DONT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH DRINKING! I DRINK, EVERYBODY I KNOW DRINKS!! but every week sometimes multiple times a week she would drunk text me random stupid shit like she couldn’t even spell properly and like she doesn’t remember shit in the morning you know like, actually fucking drunk. i can’t stand how people think that’s normal or okay. if you can’t control your drinking then don’t drink. if you can control, then have a couple drinks! enjoy yourself! BUT THERES A POINT WHERE YOU ARE DESTROYING YOURSELF.

anyways, now as I said she still fucking gets wasted all the time,BUT SHE DOESNT TALK TO ME. but she posts about it on her Instagram story (which I’m blocked from seeing but.... I have my ways🤷🏻), she talks to other people JUST NOT ME. THAT WASNT MY FUCKING INTENTION WITH MY SERIES OF INTERVENTIONS. I WANTED HER TO BECOME MORE RESPONSIBLE WITH ALCOHOL? AND THEN SHE CAN ENJOY A DRINK AND STILL TALK LIKE A NORMAL FUCKING HUMAN BEING. GOD IT MAKES ME SO FUCKING ANGRY TO KNOW THAT SHES STILL BEING WHAT I LIKE TO CALL A GLORIFIED ALCOHOLIC, BUT SHE JUST DOESNT DRUNK TEXT ME ANYMORE.

ooh then another fight.... I was venting to an NOW EX FRIEND FUCK THAT BITCH SHE BOILS MY BLOOD JUST THINKING ABOUT HER of mine ..... AND THIS MOTHERFUCKER GOD I FUCKING HATE HER FOR WHAT SHE DID.... DECIDED TO SNITCH ON ME AND MESSAGE THE GIRL AND TELL HER THAT I WAS VENTING. AND SHE MISINTERPRETED AS ME “TALKING SHIT” WHEN I NEVER EVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HER IN A NEGATIVE LIGHT. SOME PPL SAID “SHES TOXIC” I ALWAYS FUCKING DEFENDED HER BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH WE WERE FIGHTING I STILL ADORED HER. so yeah that put even more tension on our friendship. AND I DROPPED THE SNITCH GIRL RIGHT AWAY, I WILL NEVER FUCKING FORGIVE HER BECAUSE MY FRIENDSHIP WITH THE GIRL COULDVE BEEN SAVED IF IT WASNT FOR HER. FUCK HER. I FUCKING HATE HER SO MUCH AND NOW THEYRE FRIENDS AND COMMENT ON EACHOTHERS POSTS AND IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH.

anyways, like I mentioned I said a lot of terrible things to her. i was really fucking angry and I said some terrible things which I deeply regret and I tried apologizing and making it up but now already our friendship was messed up.

also, she eventually ended up getting a boyfriend and like, if I said I wasn’t a little jealous I’d be lying but I was the one who rejected her in the first place so 😳😳it’s whatever. but she told her boyfriend everything about me and this guy now hates my guts LOL . ever since she started dating the guy she talked to me less and less.

and during a short period of time when we weren’t fighting I introduced her to a friend of mine and now they talk a lot and she likes him more so YES IM FUCKING JEALOUS AND I FUCKING HATE MYSELF.

but this friend of mine she started talking to leads me to my breaking point. so you know she’s been distant because apparently every time we talk it’s a fight but I’m like BUT WHY?? and this next fight will show exactly how ITS NOT ALL MY FAULT, SHES TO FUCKING BLAME AS WELL!!

so she’s been ignoring me for a couple days after a PETTY FIGHT THAT I FELT WAS LITERALLY NOTHING JUST A SILLY LITTLE FIGHT THAT IDC ABOUT. basically she got mad because I was bullying that friend of mine about his league of legends stats 🤣 literally a fucking video game that she doesn’t like and she’s mad at me for TEASING MY FRIEND.

so I got kinda sad.... like why is she ignoring me??

she eventually responded after I sent her a looong paragraph with some identifying info so I’m not gonna show it. BUT HERES WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW SHE ISNT GONNA TALK TO ME WHILE SHES GETTING DRUNK !!

okay the next screenshot has more identifying details so I’m not gonna share but basically she LIED TO ME SAYING SHE HAD NO SERVICE FOR 3 WHOLE DAYS BLAH BLAH BLAH WHILE I COULD GET PROOF THAT SHE WAS TEXTING MY FRIEND LIKE EVERY CHANCE SHE GOT . HE TOLD ME THEY STILL TALKED AND SHE WAS PURPOSELY IGNORING ME BC IM TOO STRESSFUL FOR WHATEVER. BUT SHE FUCKING LIED ABOUT IT

so basically, here’s how it’s not just my fault . yes, getting angry is my fault I could be a little less harsh. im working on it. BUT THIS GIRL HAS BEEN IGNORING ME FOR DAYS AND THEN LIES TO ME?? COME ON ISNT THAT A VALID REASON TO BE UPSET

anyways this is the last thing I sent her before deactivating my Instagram (I have her number too but we rarely talk on there). but the fact that she said we aren’t friends anymore.... broke my fucking heart. I broke down in tears. I had to stop myself from hurting myself or saying something dumb. so I ended it there.

i tried to hard to fix what we once had. yes, I’m at fault for being a dick and not being able to control my anger. but she’s at some fault for giving me valid reasons to be upset. i tried to hard to fix our friendship. but the more I try the more angry I get. she isn’t going to listen to me. she doesn’t even care about me anymore. it’s over.

ive been pretty suicidal lately. a few months ago I started cutting myself again after years and I hate myself for it. i pushed everybody away. she was the last person I regularly talked to. maybe now I can take a break from the fighting, try to get to a better place mentally, and try to get back in touch with some of my other friends, or make new friends.

idk I’m still very upset but this long ass vent that no one is gonna read helped a lot. this all happened over a few months and today was where I ended it. time to start a new chapter I guess

#vent #i have no friends #im a terrible person

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honey-yoongles · 6 years

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Written BTS ship for btsismy6thkink

Written ship YEEEAAAAS (sorry it’s long)

Hello… it is I, one of your favourite people in the world, I am here for a ship. Also I do apologise for this being unnecessarily long, and disclaimer to you can ship me with whom ever it doesn’t need to be my bias I won’t get mad, but I might get wrecked😂

I mean you know what I look like, but if anybody else reading my ship doesn’t then this is for their curiosity. Brown, collarbone length hair also newly with bangs; blue eyes, kinda chubby but I mean I don’t mind I look cute anyway and I’m 174(coincidentally making me shorter than all the members. I don’t know if this is necessary but I have 3 marks on my body proving how unlucky and clumsy I truly am, scar at my eye(a kid threw a shovel from a decent height, thanks for that you fucking twat), scar on my finger (tried to open a can of dog food but cutting myself in the process), burn on my foot(I spilled boiling water on it while making noodles).

I’ve been struggling with mental illness since I was like 10, I used to have undiagnosed anxiety and depression causing me an inability to talk to people and easily be embarrassed and it then proceeding to my brain driving me to the edge because I couldn’t take it. I’ve been able to control it though, sure I’ve had meltdowns and suicidal thought but it got better for a while… not going to lie it’s gotten worse again but hey, I’m not planning on quitting now.

Okay, so personality traits are + INFJ (advocate, that’s what the internet tells me) + Kind, even to people who don’t deserve it. + Forgiving + Weird + Happy, even with my mental illnesses I am happy. + Funny, like yeah but dark humour + Always hungry + Stubborn(so stubborn I taught myself to ride a bike, I didn’t speak in front of my parents when I was a baby only to myself when I was alone and I taught myself English bc my teacher wasn’t good at it) + Caring + Helpful + Positive

My dream job would be a writer, but frankly I will settle for teacher as the only person who believes I could write is dead and I’m not about to have people make fun of it. I am that one huge tea drinker who doesn’t known when I should stop, I LOVE books with a passion, I want to own every book I read and that’s just how it is. I love makeup which is just a way of expressing myself. I don’t have a huge support system but I got one person I would trust with my life and frankly to whom ever you ship me with they better be alright with third wheeling.

I love horror movies, like sign me the fuck up honestly I could watch them all day, they don’t scare me. However i am jumpy, literally if I drop something and then the sound reaches my ears I jump( lets just keep the anxiety thing in mind, because that is why). I have a little baby(bunny) but her name is literally baby. I love her with all my being because she is my squishy and she shall me mine(get that reference?? Sorry). Also got a dog but I mean we all know I love him. Actually I’m just a giant animal person. One more thing before I lead into boyfriend material things, I have a dirty mind, literally I can make everything you say dirty.

As for S/O, I would be supportive as fuck, kiss them any time of the day not caring about the place, probably jealous but not to the ‘crazy’ mark, the girlfriend who would let them pick the food and not actually complain bc I mean it when I say I don’t care, I don’t lie so I would tell him everything even I he did something wrong I would leave him to guess what he did. In return I would like trust and loyalty, that’s literally all I need… okay maybe like sex but I mean, we knew that at this point.

THATS IT I DONT KNOW WHAT MORE TO WRITE

@btsismy6thkink ~

Hello to you, my in fact favourite person in the world right after min yoongi ofc lmAO IM SORRy

You asked, and I will deliver! Do not apologize for the length of your submission, it’s not like the one I send you was any better!（≧ｙ≦＊） Also we can’t have you being wrecked! Therefor I didn’t have to think twice about whom to ship you with. （＾ｖ＾）

I would encourage everyone to go and check out her blog, as I personally find her writing very good! (She writes great reactions, fan-fictions as well as ships, and she’s the reason I started doing them as well!)

Once again, thank you for your submission, I hope that you like your ship and the description I put together for you as well! *hand kiss*（*＾3＾）♡

Disclaimer: This written ship will be longer and more detailed than of what I usually do. I got carried away, so this is a one-time thing only!

I ship you with: Kim Namjoon

The first time he ever laid his eyes on you, he got hooked. He found you super cute, standing alongside and having a conversation with a girl he imagined was your best friend. You hadn’t noticed him yet, you were caught up in the gossip between you and your friend, laughing and taking sips from your drink every now and then. He admired you from afar: the way your hair framed your face perfectly, your fashionable outfit and the cutest smile, which he frankly caught himself smiling along with as well. Because he was so intrigued by you, he didn’t notice that your friend had left you alone at your table. This was his opportunity, he would think to himself, as he walked across the room taking the seat your friend had just left. Puzzled by his sudden appearance, you would let out a small sigh trying not to seem interested, when in fact you were the exact opposite. Namjoon would leave the impression of being rather introverted and shy from the first glance you’d send him, but you quickly realized that he was actually such a social butterfly. The two of you would have an hour long conversation about god knows what; he even offered to buy you a drink which you kindly refused at first, but accepted the offer the second time.

Once he got to know you better, Namjoon would admire your kind, positive yet peculiar personality. Every remark from you brought a smile on his lips, causing him to usually flash his dimples that you adored so much. Being just as unlucky and clumsy as you, the two of you would always look out for each other. Once he knew about your past issues and struggles with anxiety and depression, Namjoon would be all over you. He is the worrying kind, and would want to check up on you every minute if possible. He would at times go overboard, but you knew he did it because he cared so deeply for you.

It was no secret that Namjoon was crazy for you at this point, and it didn’t take more than a month before the two of you were officially a couple. Namjoon had written hundred of love songs about other girls and his past relationships, but when it came to you, he was simply just lost for words. You were the kind of girl who deserved the world, and yet he felt like it was impossible for him to put it into words. It was however almost certain that he would manage to write you something personal in the end.

Let us not forget about the shared interests that the two of you have as well. He loved that you had a passion for reading and collecting books, and would always ask you after you finish a piece whether or not you would recommend it for him to read. When you both had the time, he would invite you to different bookstores, buying you whatever book you showed the slightest interest in. On other occasions, Namjoon loved to take you out for either lunch or dinner. He would always suggest going to fancy places with menus on different languages that none of you understood, and although you usually didn’t care where the two of you went and what you had to eat, there would still be times where you would go against his crazy ideas, suggesting something a bit more simple. Another thing that he loved when the two of you were together, was your way of showing affection towards him. The fact that you didn’t care about what other people thought about the two of you, as well as you taking his hand while walking and randomly stealing kisses in the open.

Already after the first day of your relationship, Namjoon had invited you over to their house. He had no doubts about introducing you to the rest of the boys, because he just knew how well you would get along with them. Your positive and kind charisma would attract Taehyung and Hoseok in an instant, and they would quickly become some of your best friends. The fact that you were so good with animals as well, made them invite you over to their place rather often. They didn’t really want to admit it, but you sometimes only accepted their invite to come over just to spend time with both Yeontan and Mickey, and occasionally Holly as well, rather than hanging out with them. Seokjin would also introduce you to Eomuk and Odeng, and allow you to hold and feed them, and watch them climb around in their cage all day. After a while you would also come to befriend Yoongi, who was rather distant to begin with. Once you got to know him though, he was way more open and social when you were around the house.

#btsismy6thkink #submission #bts ship #written bts ship #bts #kim namjoon

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nighttimepixels · 7 years

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okay, to the anon who sent in that post asking along the lines of “who are you favorite skelebros/why” but not in terms of general character things but specifically the ones that, and i quote, “would be ones to…..smooch places ;3”, i accidentally deleted your ask while trying to answer it, since i’m on mobile on a break between errands and this app is nonsense.;;

sooo here’s my reply, you strange and lovely sweetheart callin me out on my inclinations =///v///=

(also apologies, can’t readmore this thanks to mobile… be back with art tonight, hopefully!)

not quite in any order:

Classic Sans: because really, how could i not? my original skeleton crush. from his beautifully purposefully shitty humor, to his time and space jokes, to using his god-level powers largely to joke and work multiple jobs and care for/tease his brother… to everything he goes through and struggles with and stands for in geno routes (which gods, i never could play). frankly, i’ve… never felt so connected to a character. his depression and his humor, his deeply caring but humor-inclined relationship with his brother, his quick wit and cleverness, everything - i love him, so very, very much.

Red: it’s kinda funny how over time the aus, while still being “copied alternates” of one another, have ended up so distinct as different individuals to me. with Red… all the things i love about Sans, but with a twist - i seriously would get along with him too well. i’m kinda a total natural flirt with anyone who i end up friends with, my humor can get pretty dark and/or risque with those who match it - i love the stars and when i’m close to someone, frankly, i just want to be with them and talk through the insomnia-ridden nights and dark thoughts and funny stories and the barbs around the kindness… i’d give him a run for his money, too, i like to think, since i’m very much the ‘kill em with kindness’ type who also gets shit done because there’s no other option, really. not to mention im fiercely protective of those i care about too - i never hold myself to the same level of importance, so - mmm, i feel like he’d… get that. especially if/when we’d get close… i have a feeling there’d be a lot of late nights that didn’t feel quite so lonely.

Stretch: the kindness and underlying good attitude of Pap, with the scientific and magical inclinations of Sans, and a Sans-type wry and witty and easygoing personality? gods, i feel like i’d be best friends woth Stretch, ‘smooching possibilities’ aside. i’d love to set up stories and chill pranks woth him, chill(and smoke a dog treat, heh) with him while wandering through a forest or sitting at some view of the surroundings, shooting the breeze or listening to musoc or just… well, just talking. i wanna play video games through the night with him, and cook with him and his brother, and get nerdy about whatever obscure thing - show him campy scifi shows and accidentally geek out over animation to him and end up pulling my hood over my head bc im flustered that i slipped up like that. i wanna listen to him talk about science, and games, and swap stories, and share the things that are too hard to share with pretty much anyone. i wanna support and love that tall skeleton, dammit…

Russ: i know not a lot is written on him, and when it is, it tends towards a drooling or uncaring to the point of mild incomptence sort of guy - but i don’t… interpret him that way. i view him as having the rough and flirty and dark humor of Red, and the sweet and mischievous and slightly more laidback inclinations of Stretch at his core. i want to connect with him, to have the inevitable flirting and quick wit sessions of easy-going but pointed jokes, and to slowly but surely end up close to him, to have those late night sessions where we seek each other’s company for both fun and comfort, for friendship and understanding. to take a break from the hanging worries and anxieties and responsibilities and just… benon the same page as someone. play videogames and make up bs silly and hilarious backstories for poorly written npcs, or watch shitty horror movies or excellent comedies, more campy scifi - to cook for him late in the night because it’s a stress reliever for me even though i cant eat the things i love to make. to drink too much coffee, or make poorman’s cocktails, or tell stories and talk theories on whagever. to hear him relax and feel like he doesn’t have to be on edge, to hear his stories and his jokes and his quality flirting, heh. i… dunno why, but i just feel really connected to him, despite how little i see him around.

… heh, i won’t get into the smooching prospects specifically, this was self-indulgent as is. (yes, even as much as i want it, aw geez. you guys know me too well;;) but let’s say i’m down for anything they’d want to dish out, and damn if i don’t love cuddling and that casual intimacy on top of all the rest. =//v//=

#pixel answers #hoh boy anon #callin me out so sweetly #thanks for letting me self indulge and be distracted for this awkward in between erdands time frame #... yes gdi i want to smooch them so badly #fuck #but also be their best friend #yknow??#i just #care for these skeletons - all of them #not just these few #so much...#and bonus i would include mafia sans too (though i relate him as a classic sans just inna diff era)#also outside the skelebros lie gaster and grillbz #... sigh #♡♡♡#i love them all #help tvt #night answers

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