#he's still a little lopsided and little ugly but mostly cute. like if i had made him as a gift i wouldn't be ashamed of him. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

superhero--imagines · 3 years

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Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here!

A/N: If I had to give this part a title, I would title it “(Y/N) and their human friends” Also I lied. This part was too long so it might be another part (or two) before we get to the Bella Arc.

* “You know you would be pretty good looking without the glasses.” Lauren says twirling a strand of hair and ignoring the algebra worksheet in front of her.

* Yeah that’s kind of the whole point

* “Contacts kind of freak me out.”

* You’re expecting a snarky response but instead she nods.

* “It’s the whole sticking your finger in your eye thing right, I totally get that.” She’s watching you with such inquisitive eyes, it almost you uncomfortable.

* It’s been a few months since you started school, you’re almost at thanksgiving break. So far you feel like you’ve assimilated well, and you have a good balance between school and caring for your animals, but it’s situations like this that totally throw you off.

* “Hey (Y/N/N), what did you get for number 5?” Jessica asks, you’re thankful for the distraction.

* “I got X = 8” Jessica confirms she got that too, and moves onto the next one

* You three are in the worlds most unlikely group. You didn’t even know Lauren was in this class you usually just pair up with Jessica.

* “Hey, me and a some people from the volleyball team are going to Port Angeles, you should come with, we could give you a makeover.”

*You wonder what the other angle here is

* It didn’t take long for you to realise that somehow, even with the ugly-duckling routine, the Cullen’s were at the top of the social hierarchy.

* Part of their popularity was probably because they didn’t really seem to interact with anyone outside of their own social circle. Which just made them all the more desirable.

* “I don’t know Lauren, I would have to ask Esme if it’s okay.” Though you can already bet Rosalie isn’t going to like this.

* “Oh cool, just let me know!” Lauren smiles, it turns out the act of considering her invitation was enough to placate her.

* For once you’re actually glad Edward’s waiting for you outside of your class when the bell rings.

* “Edward read that girls mind.”

* “It’s always straight to business isn’t it. No, ‘hi Edward how’s it going?’ Or ‘How was your class, how has your morning been treating you?’ It wouldn’t hurt you to make some small talk” You give him a look, and he returns it with an expectant expression. You sigh.

* “Hi, Edward how was your class?” You plaster on a smile, and he returns with a smile of his own.

* “It was fine. A little repetitive, we’re reading “to kill a mocking bird” in English.” You nod, offering a consoling pat on the shoulder

* “That sounds super boring,” the books great and all, but you’re guessing he’s already read it like 30 times by now. “Hey Edward,”

* “Yes (Y/N),” He nods, hiding his grin behind his hand.

* “Would you mind doing me a favor?”

* “Of course, anything for you.” He grins openly now.

* “Would you mind telling me what that girl Lauren Mallory is thinking so I can know why she invited me,” and not Jessica her good friend. “to hang out?”

* Edward loses his smile.

* “The varsity members on the volleyball team suggested it, they think it’s a shame they couldn’t have got you on the team since you just moved here.”

* Unexpected but not the worst. You’ve really been half assing it in PE so you’re surprised they even want you.

* “Lauren-she thinks you could be-“ a lopsided smirk twitches onto his face. “in her words- ‘two super good looking best friends’ “

*oh. So she just wants a pretty b*tch squad?

* “Maybe I’ll go with them then” you were scared they were going to force you to show them the Cullen’s house and introduce you to everyone, or leave you stranded in port A as some kind of prank or something.

* Edward stops you

*“you can’t be serious” he has his eyebrows scrunched together

* “Why not?” Nothing more natural to fitting in then hanging out with your classmates. Unless- “if you’re worried about any accidents don’t, I know they all look healthy but they eat a lot of carbs. Way too starchy for my palette.”

* “It’s not that-“ he gets that brooding-existence is suffering look. “You shouldn’t trust humans too much, they’ll let you down.”

* Well what’s that supposed to mean, but before you can ask he’s already walking to his class.

* Well whatever, at least Emmett will tell you a good joke to take your mind off of Mr. Eternal Damnations ominous words.

* Too bad when you get inside he’s not here, instead Mike Newton perks up when you walk into the room.

* “Hey Eleazar, how’s it going?” You still have a hard time adjusting to use Eleazar’s name as your own. Apparently they came from a time when last names were only for nobles, so he offered you his first name instead.

* “Hey Newton, any plans for this weekend?” You take Edward’s advice and start with small talk. Mike Newton smiles, you guess he’s kinda cute, all soft cheeks and baby blue eyes

* “No I’m completely free!” Weird how he’s so enthusiastic about being alone, he must be one of those “relish time alone” types. Good for him.

* “Everyone needs some time alone sometimes.” He deflates, oh man you guess that’s the wrong thing to say.

* He looks like he wants to say something to you, but then Emmett sits beside you.

* “Can I have a swig from your water bottle?” You hand it over

* “Making out with Rosalie make you thirsty?” Emmett cracks a grin

* “It’s that whole bookworm-soccer mom get up, it gets to me yknow?” That’s actually pretty funny

* “So what she’s the Velma to your Freddy?” When the reference doesn’t sink in you rephrase “the nerd to your jock.” He grins again.

* “I think I might join the swim team just so I can see her wear my letterman” that’s actually pretty cute

* “You should do that, I’ll cheer you on at your swim meets” Emmett grins.

*”I’ll hold you to that”

* School life goes on like it always has.

* Weeks pass, marked by tests, homework assignments and projects.

* You actually kind of become friends with Angela, Lauren, Jessica, Connor and Mike.

* “So like, are you and Cullen close?” Mike asks. You and the group are over at Tyler’s house using his fire pit to roast marshmallows. The others are invested in another conversation but you can tell by Lauren’s subtle head tilt that she’s eavesdropping.

* “Which one?” Mike gets flustered at that

* “The one in our grade.”

* “Hmm, well I’d say Alice and I are kinda close, but-“

* “N-no not her,” he clears his throat. “The other one-Edward”

* “Oh, Edward’s my best friend.” The answer slips out automatically.

* “I-Is that why you’re staying with the Cullen’s?” Jessica asks. Everyone’s blatantly listening now, the only one who seems uncomfortable is Angela.

* You sigh. You know everyone at school is probably wondering about the weird relationship. Jessica’s just the only one brave enough to ask you.

* “I mean, it might be.” You’re sure, Edward’s friendship with you is the reason everyone was so quick to accept the living arrangement. “But I actually met Car-I mean Dr. Cullen before I met the others.”

* “How does that work?” It’s Connor who pipes in this time.

* “Well-“ you sigh you really don’t want to do this but at least your sob story will make you seem less suspicious. “So Eleazer and Carmen, they’re my parents, but they’re not my birth parents.”

* You tell them how your parents passed away in an accident many years ago, and how Carlisle had been your Doctor at the time while you recovered. He worked with you for a long time, and you’re pretty sure he wanted to adopt you, but the agency liked Carmen and Eleazer better, probably because Carlisle already had so many adopted kids.

* “Still, Carlisle stayed in my life as my doctor and a family friend. Then I met Edward and the rest of the Cullen’s and... the rest is history...I guess.” You’ve found it’s best to mix a little bit of truth into the lie, though really all of that was mostly what happened.

* Everyone looks testy eyed, Angela is holding back tears, and Lauren hastily wipes her away so no one can see. You wonder if maybe your powers leaked out a bit while you were telling your story.

* “Dude... you’re so strong.” Tyler claps a hand on your shoulder and pulls you into a hug.

* “Ah, it all happened a long time ago, I’m mostly over it now” You tell them all about your Coven in Denali, and how you have two families now, how you don’t regret anything. Well, the only thing you regret, is not staying human, but you can’t mention that so you fake a smile instead.

* Connor breaks out a bottle of vodka he stole from his mom, and pours a shot for everyone

* “To (Y/N)” everyone raises their glass, and not for the first time you feel the urge to cry but no tears escape you.

* You’re a lot closer to everyone after that. You even start sitting at their lunch table every so often.

* In fact the others follow your lead and assimilate with their classmates with ease. Rosalie joins the school book club, and very loudly debates Jane Austen’s to whoever will listen.

* Emmett follows through and joins the swim team. Jasper starts hanging out with some wood shop kids, you’ve caught him arguing about the superior wood in between classes with his new friends. Even Alice joins the art club.

* You try out for the dance/cheer team, it’s the only thing you don’t have to hold back in. Also you’re a great base, you could hold everyone on the team up single handedly during stunts. But you won’t know if you made it until summer vacation

* Everyone seems to be assimilating well, everyone except for Edward

* “You can’t expect me to trust these people (Y/N), not when I know everything they’re really thinking.” You roll your eyes

* “I’m not saying you have to be their best friend Eddie, I’m just saying it looks super suspicious that all the Cullen’s only hang out with each other and refuse to get to know anyone else.” You shove a text book into his chest, and he scoffs

* “It wouldn’t hurt to make some small talk.”

* And so Edward joins your group of human friends, much to the joy of your female companions and dismay of your male ones.

* Life is still strange. But it’s good.

* When you’re surrounded by your new friends, it makes you feel - almost like you’re human again

* And then everything falls apart.

* It’s almost summer vacation. You’re excited, maybe you can go to the beach again soon, and you wonder if it will be alright to take a trip to Denali to see your Coven. You’re pretty confident you made the spirit squad so you’ll have to pencil in camp somewhere. You held back, but just enough by your own parameters to make the bottom end of Varsity.

* You’re at your locker, when Rosalie, and Edward show up. Quickly followed by Emmett, Jasper and Alice.

* “Oh hey guys, you wanna go on a hike tomorrow it’s supposed-“

* “You have to leave.” You’re surprised when it’s Emmett that says this. Kind, jovial Emmett holds a grave expression.

* “What, why-“ for a second you wonder if the Volturi has finally come to get you. It’s been at least seven years since your transformation, it’s about time they started thinking about you.

* But then you notice everyone staring, the quiet buzz of phones vibrating only detected by your super hearing. People are always staring, especially when you’re all together. but this time you notice they’re not staring at the six super models gathered in front of the lockers.

* They’re staring at you.

* “There’s a video of you going around,” Jasper says, and Rosalie placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. “I think it’s better if you see for yourself.”

* He hands you his blackberry, and the grainy image of you come into focus.

* It’s a YouTube video

* You’re in the locker room, your (Your Color Skin) in full view under the fluorescent lights. You’re wearing your underwear, and your abs are on full display. You’re Grey PE uniform shirt is limp in your hands, you remember this, you got extra laps as a penalty and as a result, you were running late for class, you were alone in the locker room

*well you thought you were alone.

* Your body is literally perfect, the way you’ve always dreamed, but you feel white hot shame rise in your throat like acid.

* Your hands shake as you scroll down to see the comments

* ‘Damn who knew they had a body like that under those dorky sweaters’

* ‘(Y/N) Eleazar: Best body Forks HS 10/10 would f*ck’

* ‘Hot body, if only they ditched the glasses, and started wearing some tighter shirts’

* And the comments go on, there’s at least a hundred. You hold your cardigan a little closer to your body. You don’t have the courage to turn around. You can already imagine them staring at you, picturing what they saw in the video transposed onto your body

* “I’m sorry, I didn’t see this coming until it was already happening-“ Alice touches your shoulder and continues her apology but you don’t hear anything.

* You want to cry, you want to be angry. But all you feel is shame. And the worst part is, you didn’t even do anything wrong. So why do you feel so ashamed?

* “Hey, look at me.” Edward grabs your face in his hands, your amber eyes meet his.

*”Snap out of it.”

* Oh, your powers are leaking through.

*Your gaze turns to your foster family, all of whom sport equally uncomfortable expressions.

* You take a deep breath, and imagine reeling in your emotions, imagining them receding back into a locked box, just like Eleazer taught you.

* You need a calm mind right now.

* “Are you fine now?” Edward asks, his hands still on your face. You nod, resting your hand on top of his

* “I’m good.”

* “Good, because we have to get you out of here.” He’s moved his hand to your arm, about to tug you back home when you pull back and shake your head.

* “We can’t do that.”

* “What do you mean?” Rosalie hisses, her hand curls around your wrist “we have to leave NOW.”

* “No think about it, they’re right.” Jasper says, his eyes meeting yours. At least someone’s on the same oage

* “Think about it Rose, if I leave now with all of you it’s going to look weird.” Normal 15-17 year olds wouldn’t think to handle the situation on their own, especially not entitled rich kids like the Cullen’s.

*She seems to have gotten it because her hand retreats to her side.

* “Well what should we do then, I’m not letting you walk around here with everyone-“ she cuts herself off, a deep frown creasing onto her face as her teeth dig into her bottoms lip.

* “We need to call Carlisle or Esme, they’ll pretend they saw the video from someone else and file a complaint with the school.” You take a deep breath, and imagine the locked box in your mind. Your emotions held carefully within.

* “Until then we all need to pretend like it’s not a big deal.”

* “No way in hell am I doing that!” Emmett growls. “I’m going to rip that fucking peeping Tom piece by piece.”

* “Not all of us need to pretend,” Alice says, her gaze somewhere far away, flicking between futures. “Only Edward, Rosalie and I do.” Her gaze lands on you.

* “You need to go to your class like normal,” a hint of a smile curls onto her mouth. “Everything’s going to work out fine.” Edward’s focusing on Alice, reliving her vision.

* “Do you think you can manage being alone?” Edward asks, you don’t have the next class with any of the Cullen’s. You’ll be on your own.

* You catch Jasper and Alice whispering to each other, but pay it no mind. Flirting even in the middle of your entire world crumbling down.

* You take a deep breath, picturing the locked box over and over, making it a visual mantra.

* “I can get through a period.” Everyone disperses, and Jasper walks you to your next class. Edward wanted to, but Jasper insisted.

*”You’re always hogging them, give someone else a few minutes Edward.”

* You’re almost near your class when Jasper talks to you.

* “Hey, I don’t know if I should tell you this”

*You wonder if he’s going to offer to beat up the person who took the video, or if he’s going to offer you a comforting word.

* “Alice told me you’re going to raise some hell on a misogynist in there” he gives you a wicked grin, his incisors sparkling.

* How is it that every vampire seems to say what you least expect to hear and yet, it’s exactly what you need in the moment.

* He holds out his fist, and you bump it with your own. A grin curling onto your face.

* “Hell yeah I am.”

* You take your usual seat in Spanish like normal. You sit in the front row in this class, diagonally from Jessica. Mike and Angela sit somewhere in the back.

* You just need to focus and keep your emotions in check for 45 minutes. You visualize the box, calming yourself separating the mind and body.

* How did the saying go... a calm soul resides in a calm body?

* “-Zar, Miss. Eleazar!” Your eyes pop up to the teacher, the locked box falling out of grasp.

* “Yes, sorry?” The teacher sighs, you look to the white board to see you’re going over the answers to the worksheet. You’re about to provide the answer for the number you’re on when the teacher cuts you off.

* “I know you might be focused on body building, but in my class you need to focus on the material.” There’s a scattered laugh that fills the room, but your blood runs cold

* “Excuse me?”

* And that’s when your teacher knew he fucked up. He stutters over himself, the sentences overlapping

* “-really you should take it as a compliment-“

* “Oh you think I should take it as a compliment that someone recorded me without my consent while I was changing?”

* The rooms pin drop silent. Your teacher is sweating.

* “Hold on now- I think you’re being a little dramatic don’t you think” A smirk curls onto his lips. “You were in your underwear, it was really no different than wearing a swimsuit” he’s got this smug smile, like he’s right.

*Honestly you were ready to put everything behind you and move on if he just apologized. It’s gross that a teacher is watching videos of a student changing, but what would you have done in his situation if a co-worker showed you.

* “It’s all about perspective, a positive per-“

* But not anymore, you’re not in a forgiving mood, especially not for an idiot like this.

* “No it’s all about consent.” All the anger and despair you’ve been holding back comes flooding out. “When someone wears a swimsuit they’re consenting to show skin and be seen, but I wasn’t contesting to being seen when I was changing in the privacy of the locker room.” You don’t stop for air, your voice trembling

* “And another thing, I wonder how the school administration will feel knowing the same faculty that’s supposed to make students feel safe and enrich their lives is watching creepy videos-“ you stop when you meet your teachers eyes, tears streaming down his face.

* Oh f*ck

* You look to your right, finding your classmates in a similar state, holding back tears.

*So this is what happens to humans when they come in contact with your power.

* You try to visualize the box, but it’s too far now. And all the crying people around you don’t help.

*You need to get out of here.

* “Pathetic, not even an apology for your gas lighting.” She shake your head as confidently as you can, grabbing your bag with trembling hands.

* You walk quickly, maybe there’s a mountain you can climb and wait it out on. You’ll text Carlisle and let him now what happened. It shouldn’t be too-

*” Hey wait!”

* You’re already in the hallway when someone call out to you. You turn, expecting it to be Angela or Mike. Never in a million years would you expect her to be standing there in the middle of the hall, her hand hastily wiping away a stray tear.

* “Mr. Peterson’s a f*cking jerk.” Jessica sniffles, walking quickly to catch up with you. You don’t miss the fact that her bags not slung across her back.

* She must have left a minute after you did. You haven’t thought about her as a friend. Not a real one at least. She’s kind of like hot sauce, it’s fun when it’s around, but if it’s not then that’s not a big deal.

* So to see her here, the first to follow you out, rambling about wether you want to get frozen yogurt or pizza, it warms your unbeating heart.

* “Hey Jessica?” She stops mid-sentence, her eyes swinging up to you.

* You haven’t been fair to her. But you’re going to change that.

* “Thanks for being my friend.” And she smiles at you, her arms wrapped around her tight. It’s not the fake ones you see often the ones she throws to Lauren when she’s asking for Jessica’s opinion on an outfit, or when Connor tries to copy her homework’s. it’s a genuine smile.

* Before she can open her mouth, you hear two more shouts from the hallway.

*Angela and Mike are jogging down the hallway to catch up with you. The latter carrying a bright pink backpack in his hand.

* “Geez Jess, the least you could do is take your bag before you go bolting out of there” Mike’s panting as he holds out her bag. You don’t miss the blush ghosting her face.

*Looks like she still has a crush on him.

* “Hey, are you okay?” Angela asks, and you wish you could cry as you nod.

* “Is it weird that I’m kind of happy right now?” And the three of them smile, before wrapping you into a group hug.

*They all smell terrible. Jessica smells like boiled broccoli, Mike is like the overwhelming stench of fat mixed with sugar, and Angela.. Angela’s probably the worst. She’s sickeningly sweet mixed with a healthy dose of starch.

*it’s disgusting. You have a hard time believing any of the Cullen’s would lose their minds when they’re this close to any of them.

*still, even with the repulsive stench, it’s nice. You haven’t felt the body gets of another human in a long time, or heard the quiet thump of their beating heart. Even the odor is nice, it reminds you that they’re human.

*And for a second it’s easier to pretend you’re human too, just like them.

* “Dude why are you so cold?” Jessica groans, breaking the moment. She taps your arm but doesn’t pull away.

* “While we’re asking questions, Mike how much axe do you use?” Angela’s eyes are watering as you both laugh.

* “Like you’re one to talk, I can smell your strawberry shampoo two hallways over!”

* You watch the three of them untangle and start walking to the back exit from the gym.

* “So where do we go now? We can’t stay here.” Angela says

* “I was thinking maybe a coffee shop, if we take out books we might pass for having a free period” Jessica pipes in

* “Oh, how about the Arcade? A buddy of mine works there since he’s already on break from college, I don’t think he’ll minds us hanging out there.”

* So this is what Alice meant when she said everything was going to be okay.

*Your Human Friends were going to save you

*You haven’t forgotten Edward’s warning, someone did break your trust and let you down.

* But that’s what it means to build friendships, you open yourself to being hurt, and so do they.

* “Hey (Y/N/N), what do you think?” Mike asks, and they all turn around to notice you’re not walking with them.

*You try not to smile to wide. You don’t want to scare them off now.

* “I think there’s something fun about an arcade during the day, no lines.” You say, walking a little bit faster to catch up with your friends.

Tag list: @moonlights27 @thebluetint @the100thtwilight @awesomebooklover17 @oneofthepotterheads @smileygirl08 @imdoingathingmom @iconicgguk @yrawn @alyciaswhore @little-horror-show

#twilight imagines #twilight reader insert #twilight headcanon #twilight imagine #twilight saga #twilight #Edward Cullen #edward cullen x reader #edward cullen imagine #Emmett cullen #Emmett cullen x Rosalie hale #rosalie hale #Jasper hale x Alice cullen #Edward Cullen x y/n #Edward Cullen x you #midnight sun #superhero—imagines

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sophie-i-guess13 · 2 years

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Dahlias

Okay essentially this is what happens to Sylvia after Dallas’s death. Also, if you’re one of those people who like music and fics, I recommend Almost (sweet music) by Hoizer. Mostly for the line “I laugh like me again / (s)he laughs like you.”

|Words: 2584|

|Characters: Sylvia, OC’s, Dallas Winston|

|Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet|

|TW: Canonical Character Death|

Tag! @mjmacchio1991 @apricot-colored-feathers @pepsi-and-cigarettes @the-kneesbees @ralphmaccchiato

I have plenty of scars. Most on my hands and arms, even a few on my legs from all the times I’ve stumbled through the house in the dark to get to her bedroom when she starts to cry. Hell, I even have a scar on my shoulder from that one night at Buck’s. You remember that, don’t you? Don’t even get me started on the one on my hand- all ‘cause you couldn’t hold a chain right.

I don’t have to worry about turning my knee varying shades of blue, green, and purple when I wake up and pull the sheets back into place, though. She’s getting better at sleeping through the night, now we just have to work on getting her to stay in her own bed. She’d woken up with her daddy this morning and let me get a little bit of extra sleep. Now, she’s sprawled out on the sheepskin rug Rob’s great aunt or grandmother or something was so keen on giving us.

It’s coated in two generations worth of dog hair, burnt tobacco, and whatever else Great Aunt Sandra managed to spill and never clean up, but now my daughter loves to spill her Cheerios over the rug and pick them up, one by one, waiting for Daddy to get home. I can hear reruns of The Flintstones going on in the living room. If I look over my shoulder, I can watch her staring at the tiny silver screen, too.

She looks real cute when she does it, legs crossed with her dry cereal splattered around in front of her and lopsided pigtails. I think that if the opportunity presented itself, I’d be able to sit and watch her all day. Listen to her babble and stumble around the house as she plays with her toys, watch her eyes go as big as the dinner plates when the doorbell rang or a bird flew past the window.

But I’ve never had the luxury of sitting back while others tidy my mess, and that ain’t about to start anytime soon. Not unless Rob hits it big with whatever scheme the Shepard brothers have him roped up in.

So I turn back to the sink and drop my hands back to the warm, soapy water. I can feel the small cuts and scrapes painted across my skin when my hands scrub clean her sippy cups. I’ve got plenty of little reminders of the life I once lived on my fingers, but more than enough reminders of what it means to be a mother on my chest. No one tells you how nippy babies can be, but we’ve weaned her onto bottles now. Momma can go on and on about how “breastfeeding will strengthen our bond”, but if Dahlia and I were any more bonded, you’d think she was still inside me.

No, I did not name my only daughter after you, you cocky asshole. Dahlias have always been my favourite flower and- well, I had to tell Rob I was pregnant with his child four weeks after our wedding and through six inches of bulletproof glass, so he decided he didn’t get an opinion on her name.

It’s a pretty name for a pretty girl, named after a pretty flower. Never mind they’re the same ones I left on your gravestone the first time I was brave enough to visit.

We have a small house- even by eastside standards. I don’t have a bulbous stomach anymore, but getting around in the kitchen is still a tight squeeze with all of Dal’s stuff lying around. The kitchen blends right into the dining area, which is exactly between the door to our backyard and the front door. That door, the one that faces the back of the park Bob Sheldon died at, is to the left of the living room.

I think the living room is my favourite place in the whole house. We’ve got a little television, an old beat-up sofa and recliner and a coffee table smack dab in the middle of the ugly rug. It smells like coffee most of the time- since drinking coffee while she watches cartoons is Rob and Dahlia’s morning routine. I really don’t know what that poor fool is gonna do when she has to go to school. In those early hours, the sun bleeds in through the three panes of glass behind the television and paints my floor like a kaleidoscope. Most of all, I love what the sun and her rays do to my pictures on the wall.

We were nineteen. Two teenagers- children, really, with veins crawling with liquor and lust. No one thought we’d last the week, but here we are, three years later. The photo in the center was us on our wedding day, his arm looped around my waist while my eyes strained to look everything but hungover. My curls were products of Angela’s hairspray and Evie’s drugstore curlers, making me into a budget Dolly Parton. If you squint, you can see my hand pressed against his chest and the ring he’d put on my finger.

If you look closer still, you can see the chain of your St. Christopher on my lace-lined throat. It didn’t seem right to wear another man’s ring on my wedding day, even if Rob told me he didn’t mind.

From there, the pictures branch off in our own family tree. We have everything from Christmas Eve and Morning, to Halloween (Dahlia was really into cowboys that Fall), even Rob’s first mugshot as a married man and “Baby’s first time visiting Daddy in prison” because I thought it was funny. The one I’m staring at now is the newest to the collection- and the reason for the new scar on the back of my knuckles.

Your memory’s been plaguing Buck’s for long enough. I’d tried doing it a million times before, but storming into your bedroom with a garbage bag and a blinding fury only seemed to get harder. I hated every damn second it took to empty your dresser and chuck what was left of your clothes into those black bags. I hated tiptoeing over your carpet and seeing the shapes staring back at me, the stains we’d left all those times we thought Buck had no idea we’d helped ourselves to his secret stash.

I hated seeing our initials carved into your door frame.

I hated the fact that I cried into Rob’s chest for most of the evening when we decided everything of yours that couldn’t be donated or recycled would just be burned. Buck and Dahlia had fun though, tossing sticks into the burning pile behind the bar and away from prying eyes. I hated the feeling of my flesh bubbling when I barely stopped Buck from tossing away your red t-shirt.

It was easily the rattiest piece of clothing I’d ever seen you in, but I’d seen you in it too many times to just let it go up in smoke. It sits in the bottom of my dresser most days, I’ll make use of it eventually. I don’t wear it, of course. When he’s gone, I usually wrap myself in one of Rob’s over shirts if it gets cool enough.

Dahlia squeals suddenly, the sound slicing through the air and cutting off the last bit of Fred Flintstone’s next clever idea. It’s an odd mix of a giggle and typical baby-babble, but it’s a sound like no other and only heard when Rob’s keys jingle in the doorknob.

You probably met him a while back, though I doubt you’d remember him. Rob Cook was a skinny sonuvabitch back in high school, all gangly limbs and a nose he hadn’t quite grown into. He ran with Tim and his gang- has been for about six years now. There’s a warm gust of late-summer air blowing through the open door when I wipe my hands on the dishcloth hanging from the oven door and purse my lips and cross my arms over my chest. Dahlia waddles towards her daddy, swaying back and forth on her tiny feet until he scoops her into his arms.

She settles almost instinctively, curious fingers already distracted by the shiny buttons of his leather jacket, or a single strand of his greased-back hair. Everyone says the sixties are dying- they are- but you should know as well as anyone that being a greaser isn’t something you just quit.

“Tim says hello,” he says as he kicks off his shoes and makes his way back into the living room, pausing for a moment to glance at the t.v. “My parents do, too. Wondering if you wanna head over for dinner sometime this week.”

Now that we’re older, he’s really grown up. He’s still got some acne dotted across his chin, but it’s mostly covered by stubble now. His hair’s quite a bit darker now, too- not nearly as dark as Johnny’s was, but a nice, rich brown. Rob has eyes I can’t describe. I’ve spent too long staring at them in all different settings, trying to make sense of the millions of different shades swirling around his pupils. It’s a nice change, I think. Something different than just cold blue staring back at me all the time. Dahlia really did take after her daddy in every way; from the same even tan, to the same wide nose, even the way her hair rested and curled around her chubby cheeks.

“That’s just fine,” I drawl in response, “remind me to get your momma’s casserole recipe. Y’know, the one with the- “ Contrary to the things you read in magazines nowadays, I really didn’t have a problem with my in-laws. They were honestly the only couple my parents’ age who didn’t seem to hate each other. Marg adored me and the granddaughter I’d given her, and Samuel came around constantly, always making sure his son was treating me right and that I wasn’t about to waste my money on a handyman when he could clean my gutters for free.

Well, he’d clean them as long as I promised he could buy Dahlia her first bike, that is.

The subconscious part of my mind forces my feet to carry me across the floor and into his arms’ reach. I don’t even notice until his fingers hook through my belt loops and pull me towards him and all I can smell is burnt tobacco and Old Spice.

He’s never come home smelling like perfume I can’t afford or hairspray I don’t use. He’s never come home with lipstick stains on his collar, or the scent of hard liquor on his breath. He’s never done anything to scare me. Never raised a fist or a hand to me, I don’t even think I’ve ever heard him raise his voice. I spent too long trying to convince myself I didn’t deserve it; that I didn’t deserve to be loved by a guy like him. Jesus, I even rejected his first proposal ‘cause I thought he was joking.

Now, I sink into his arms and tuck my head just beneath his chin, relishing in the low chuckle I can feel at the base of his throat. “How are the boys?” I mumble. He just laughs and shakes his head. It’s still a gang, I guess, still pulling different stunts I thought Tim and Curly would’ve let die with their youth. Then I remember Tim and Curly ain’t you.

The Shepards and Buck are the only of your buddies I still talk to nowadays. I keep in touch with Evie and Kathy- Angela, too, but what’s left of the Curtis gang won’t even look my way when we pass in the grocery store. The joke’s on Steve Randle, though, he’ll have to see my face every day when we both drop our kids off at preschool.

“Y’know how they are,” he says in return, “word’s goin’ ‘round with some guys from the southside tryna start something. Might go down there and set ‘em straight one of these nights.” He holds me a little tighter as the sentence hangs in the air, the sinister meaning leaves a taste like soap in my mouth. “Don’t worry about it, Syl, you know I’m coming home to you.”

I realize then and there I didn’t mourn you like a girlfriend is supposed to. I didn’t miss the weight of your arm around my waist as we strolled into my cousin’s bar, not the smell of your aftershave or the way your clothes felt against my skin. Thinking of it, I didn’t do a damn thing like that for you. I did that for Rob. For my husband.

I didn’t mourn you like a girlfriend would mourn for a lover. I knew the title never fit me, and I finally know why. I didn’t lose a lover the night you died, I lost a friend. That’s what I miss. I miss the nights you chucked pebbles at my bedroom window until I pulled it open and saw you standing there, Buck’s car keys caught in your fist and shining in the moonlight- as corny as it is.

I’ll always miss those midnight adventures and the nights we spent together, speeding down the freeway cursing our parents’ names until our voices were raw.

I realize now, as I sink back onto the sofa and let Dahlia crawl across the floor to pick away at what’s left of her cereal, that I don’t miss you. Rob’s arm is cast over my shoulder, lips pressed against my temple and eyes on our daughter. It doesn’t hurt to say your name anymore, to picture your smile, or think about tearing your t-shirt apart and turning it into a few new rags.

The sixties are dying alongside the life I lived with you. I’ll never walk into that bar again and find you in the crowd, I’ll never call one of my girlfriends up in the middle of the night and fill her in on how you messed up again. I’ll never lean against your shoulder when we’re stuck watching some shitty flick at the Drive-In, and I’m okay with that.

I have plenty of scars I’ve earned throughout my lifetime, most with stories I don’t remember. I know where I got the one on the inside of my forearm, though. I know where the scar on my earlobe came from, too. Letting you pierce my ear with a sewing needle wasn’t my smartest idea, but it made for a good story, even years after it happened. Even years after you died.

The scar across my heart is new and still burns more often than not- burning with grief I thought for so long I had no claim to. I didn’t lose you the way your gang did, the way your family did, but it hurt all the same. I resented you for it for longer than I should have, too.

I’m five years older and five years wiser. If I’ve learned anything from soothing a baby and bandaging up my husband after yet another rumble, it’s that scars can heal.

It may take a while, but scars heal. You don’t have to forget about them, but there will come a day when they don’t hurt anymore.

I doubt you’ll care, you never seemed interested in my approval anyway, but I think it’s time I admit it. If not for you, then for me, you selfish asshole.

I’m okay, Dally. I forgive you.

#soapie’s stuff #the outsiders #the outsiders fanfiction #sylvia (the outsiders)#dallas winston #merrill's place for runaway youth #MOVING #i FREAKING LOVE ROB <3

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finderskeepersff · 5 years

Text

62.

It’s odd my brother got a new number anyways, I figured it out about the number. Well I didn’t figure it out, I just asked who it is and it’s Leyton. He must miss me because he just texts me so much, I offered for him to visit me for Christmas but he declined. Locking my phone before stretching my arms out, I am tired but I am not complaining I got to stay in bed longer than usual, Cassius woke up with Cartier and I was like sure let me turn on my side and go back to sleep. I am a little shocked with Cassius, I assumed he was going to be jumping off the walls and catching the first flight out, he didn’t. He stayed home and remained here without a care but I see it, I see that slight change in a good way. He does things himself mostly, I don’t have to ask or say to him he has to do this. His confidence has changed, I think he has remembered that he is boss and it’s hit him but in a good way, I think he is moving slow or doing something different this time. My phone pinged, Leyton has been on it with this texting and I am not even joking. Looking at my phone, it is him. Unlocking my phone and opening the message.

From: Leyton

To: Sofia

You really having another baby with him??

Not like him to question me on my decisions and besides, I know he likes Cassius so I think unless Celine has told him something different, texting him back.

To: Leyton

From: Sofia

I am, and I am happy with that decision. We both are x

Pressing send and sighed out, let me get out of bed. I need to check on my men, throwing my phone to the side. Pushing my bed covers back, I feel a lot different with this pregnancy. I am not sure, I am not as sick and also my stomach is not big as it was with Cartier, like it’s not already big. There is a small pouch anyways, I will take that. Maybe it is a girl, this is why it’s so different but I feel it and I like it this way. I am beginning to accept this a lot, I think it is more to do with the fact I have Cassius here to help in which I needed a lot. Dragging myself up on the bed, I would like to just stay in bed all day.

Normality, what a feeling and I love it. Walking into the living area “the hell you doing boy, you don’t crawl like that. Boy, you ain’t even moving” he is annoying Cartier, I can tell he is and with the way Cartier is screaming, he is annoyed “you being mad loud for no reason too” peaking over the couches, Cassius and Cartier are both on the floor, Cassius can really leave my son alone on the floor, he is just there annoying him. Cartier crawling is really funny, like he refuses to use his legs, he’s just dragging himself across the floor with his arms. Cartier gripped Cassius tee “you threatening me? Wow! Cartier, you being threatening to me!?” Cassius laughed, watching my son dragging himself up. He stands, I mean with the support of something he does. Cartier face planted onto Cassius top “no way! You drooling as shit too” Cassius moved him back onto his butt, after all that work and he did that “you bullying my son Cassius” Cartier waved his arms around and cried out “he learning, I ain’t do anything. He only crying because he heard your voice, he was struggling and I helped him” Cassius laughed “sure you was” walking around the couch “my baby boy, what did he do” Cartier cried out more “I know he is being annoying” picking Cartier from the floor “it’s ok, mommy is here now” kicking Cassius in the stomach lightly “there you go, I hit him for you” walking over to the couch.

Turning Cartier around on my lap “you know when Cartier goes through all that effort for you to just put him back to stage one, he gets very temperamental, remind you of anyone?” I smiled at Cassius “reminds me of someone called Cassius, he’s a good looking guy you know” pulling a face at him “he ain’t all that, you wish” pressing a kiss to the side of Cartier’ face “how are you feeling?” I love my baby boy so much, he is so calm in my arms. Rocking side to side with him “I am ok, taking every day as it comes. I still want you to get rid of them phones, I don’t want them. My plan is, start new” watching Cassius get up from the floor “I mean if you want me to do that I will, I don’t mind. I just thought you had numbers in there” he really doesn’t want them phones back, Cassius in sweatpants is a thing for me. He crouched down in front of me “I was thinking, we need Christmas tree and things. Why don’t I take you out for that and also for some food with Cartier” tilting my head to the side “really?” he nodded his head “I want to be different, change and all that. I want the house to look dope for Cartier, only we can do that. Also I know you are not happy with me with having weed but I am ok, I think it helps me. I didn’t come all this way to go back to drugs Sofia, I don’t want you to be upset with me either. I have a clear mind, even with what happened with Kyle, I ain’t spoken to him still but eventually. I want to take you out, all three of you” how can I even be angry with that, I swear my heart falls every time “it ain’t late to make memories is it?” shaking my head “and you hammer head, relax. I be playing, you got issues” see how calm Cartier is with me, with Cassius he is just loud.

Cassius is watching me get ready, seems like a thing he likes to do and hasn’t stopped with the tradition “so you have never picked out a tree before? Not even gone to a store?” I asked Cassius, he’s never done these cute things “nope, it just appeared I guess. I walked into the house and there it was. It was never something I was involved with, I paid out though” poking my lips out at him “that is not good but you can experience it for the first time with me, we will get a proper tree. I know a place, well I seen it. We will pick it out and everything, make it special for us” smiling at him, let me finish off my mascara. Walking back into the bathroom “that will be good, I was thinking like. Where the tree at” I swear I am behind on my make-up, this is Cassius fault “I am thinking though, what are you up too with things. It’s like you are being quiet with things” I am wondering “soon, I just want to take it slow. I need to think of the dangers. Also I am thinking hard on marrying you, so I got that too” I smiled to myself, I want that more than anything.

Opening the car back door “you getting the stroller out?” I shouted out, if not I will get it and let her take Cartier “actually you get Cartier, you pregnant” I do forget sometimes, walking around the car “you sure, I don’t mind getting it” Sofia said, pressing the button on the key so the trunk can open “it’s cool, I got it. This place is busy, does it do delivery service? I ain’t having that shit on my car” I know the real ones make such a mess “yeah they do” grabbing Cartier’ stroller from the back “so how do I open this?” I am being dead ass with this because Sofia does it all of the time “wait, let me point it out. There is leaver at the back, just push it out. It will pop open” a leaver, the fuck is that. Looking around the stroller “here” Sofia walked over to me “there” she pointed out “just push it, it will pop open” pushing the leaver, just like that it popped open “wow, learnt something new. Look at that boy, hey boy! I learnt something new” Cartier smiled at me “you need to learn this, remember that for next time. We might need a stroller for twins actually” furrowing my eyebrows at Sofia “you’re having twins? I mean I am all for kids but twins?” Sofia laughed as she strapped Cartier in “no, it’s because he is still small and he will need the stroller still. I need it to fit them both in” letting out an oh, I get it.

Tree picking is supposed to be fun, I am not sure because it seems boring a little. I mean I do like it, I got Sofia wrapping her arm around mine as we walked around, I am pushing the stroller, as I would “how about that one?” I asked pointing to a tall, thin Christmas tree with few pine leaves “that is ugly as shit” she said in disgust “It's tall, but thin. You want it to be thick with lots of pine leaves? That shit will be everywhere” Sofia nods and we continue to walk along, I really want her to pick anything now “How about that one?” I am not even lying, I am picking out anything right now “It's tall and thick. And there's lots of pine needles” I added, Sofia shook her head “It's a little lopsided” I scoffed “your eyebrows are” I said, Sofia gasped hitting my shoulder “be quiet” I grinned as we continued to walk by lots of trees, lots of people too. I didn’t know so many people did this kind of thing “this one!” Sofia pointed “have you seen the size of it?” is she crazy “have you see the size of our home? The high ceilings we have, this will be perfect. I want it!” who the hell going to decorate that “are you serious?” Sofia moved away from me and made her way to the tree, she has made her mind up on this one.

I wasn’t about to go and buy ornaments without eating, I know Cartier has fallen asleep but I know if he was awake he would be hungry like me “you done?” Sofia sat down across from me “yeah, they still not bought our food out? I am so hungry but I wanted to say, I am so happy you wanted to do this with me. To go out and do this, to not have dragged you to do it and you wanted too. Thank you, you have made me very happy and also I have something to tell you. I mean it’s not bad news but it kind of helps me make a decision on what I want to do so” she dragged out “so Mia got me tickets and also Amira to go Cali. A girls time away, and it’s like next week, I wasn’t sure at all. Cartier and everything. I said to her no and make it for next time, only time she got off so my only option is you. That means you need to look after him all weekend while I go but I feel like being away from him for that long, it’s too much. It’s my son, to leave him. I just want to know how you feel and think to this?” sitting back in my seat, I have been getting followed throughout this whole day “I think” catching Kalia staring at me “you think what?” Sofia said “I think, you should go. Have time away, you deserve it Sofia” her face softened “really?” nodding my head “it’s fine, I can deal with Cartier, you will be back and then it’s Christmas, it’s ok” Sofia smiled at me so wide “are you sure?” nodding my head getting up from my seat “I need the bathroom” Kalia walked by the table “ok” walking off towards the bathroom.

Looking behind me at Sofia, she is at her phone. Turning towards the kitchen, following behind Kalia. It’s funny what you can do when you have a badge, the cooks just stared as we walked by them to get to the back of the building. Closing the door behind me “had fun following me today?” she really likes doing it “we need to have contact better” she is alone today “for what exactly?” walking around her “when I found out you had an informant in the building, I found it. Nobody else, I threatened him. Makes me wonder why you didn’t chose me” I sniggered “women aren’t the trusting type you see, I don’t really trust you Kalia” she is big headed, she is giving me that vibe. She unfolded a piece of paper “I assumed you wouldn’t, this” she held it up “is the paperwork to put through for your home to be raided again, I was supposed to put it through. They want to find anything they can to pin things on you, you think I would risk myself to just come here for nothing. Cassius I know everything about you, I have seen everything. Talking about informant, he was ready to get you in trouble. He had a case on you” I shrugged “still don’t understand why you want to help me? What do you want because I am happy with Sofia and my son, so if you want sex that is a no” I don’t want to know “you right, I do like you but being a detective is not paying the bills for my son, he has Leukaemia. I need to pay for his bills and as well pay for my dad’ medical bills. I want money. You a good looking guy and I see you are happy” I wasn’t expecting that “how old is your son?” I asked “nine, I had him when I was eighteen. His father got killed on his first birthday so yeah, it’s not been great but I need help with money to keep my family and I will keep yours safe” this seems too much, like I can’t risk that “you have hunted me down for years, arrested me for years and now this. When you can prove your worth, and I am sorry about your son, if it is true” walking off, I ain’t playing with that at all, I can’t risk it.

“Cassius!” Kalia shouted “this is my son, look at him! This is him now, I am not speaking lies. I am always by the law but when you need help, you need it and I need it right now” turning around, looking at the picture. Her son very much looks not well “I will give you what you want, I know they are coming for Rapheal. We have a whole board with your pictures on there, I can show you that. I just need the money, I want to keep my son alive” this ain’t my problem “you know what, Ethan will be in touch” I said before turning around “how will he know to get to me?” she asked “Kalia, I know everything. When you run Brooklyn you do!” dragging open the door, she wants to be my informant but I need more confidence on her and I will push her limits. I can see it on her face, she is sincere and is desperate, you know the type that will want to do anything for their child and you can’t just play that. Ethan will track down and see if her story plays out.

Sitting back down at the table “did you get lost? Your food was getting cold” watching Kalia walking off “a little, it’s fine. So yeah, you was saying. I think you should go, it will be good for you. Cartier and I will be fine. Do it” I winked at her “that means a lot Cassius, that you want me to go” nodding my head, looking down at my food. I have a lot going on in my mind, I mean step one is to get my shit back, to beat Rapheal ass, I ain’t forget. The fact I haven’t spoken to Ethan for so long, but I am going to do this right. I will do it my way, I will let people think I am gone and that I have lost touch. I am going to build from the bottom, if I start from the top it won’t build a good foundation and if Kalia’ shit comes true, I have a good side partner to play the law while I do my shit. The amount of shit I could do, how powerful I will be. Imagine that, the woman investigating me is with me “what are you smirking at me?” Sofia asked “just you, you’re beautiful” things will be good, I will do this right this time.

Knocking on Kyle’ front door, I was going to make Sofia do it but I thought I would it myself. I wish he would hurry up, it’s cold. Knocking on the door again but even harder this time “coming!” hearing Kyle say, the door opened finally “I want Ethan’ number” I ain’t coming here to strike up some good old conversation with him “Cassius” he said “yes that is me but the number, please” I am still sore with him “uh yeah, one miniute” he walked back into the house, I am being calm to be fair and this is me being as calm as I can. I could beat his ass but I won’t, this is not a small thing. This is actually on a grand fucking scale and I am pissed off “his number” he held out a peice of paper to me “thanks” that is all “Cassius, can we please just talk about this. I didn’t mean to do that” turning around “we all don’t mean to do something, but we do it still. What gets me, is that you lied to me and also on top of that. You ran to Miami, there was no need. Ethan was there, you purposely was being dumb, Amira was fine and you knew that” walking off, seeing a cute flower “I will take this” pulling it off the stem and rushed to my car, I wil continue to be sore with him about this. Slamming the car door shut “for you” holding it out to Sofia “you stealing Amira’ flowers, you’re funny. Was you nice to Kyle?” Sofia took the flower from me “I am always nice my love, I was nice as I could be Sofia. He’s really fucked me up” let me just park my car up, I could have dropped them off and walked across the road but that is effort.

I do need to get my own phone but for now, I will use Sofia’ phone. I haven’t spoken to Ethan in so long, hopefully he’s fine “yo” he answered, the phone number is witheld “it’s Cassius Ethan” I said “oh shit, Cassius? You’re alive, nice to hear you again. It’s been a while” he is soft “I am sure you don’t miss my orders but yeah, I am around. I have heard, everything” if I left Kyle in charge then Ethan would listen to what he says “I didn’t agree with the things Cassius, Atlanta was his problem and I said it to him. I was in Miami and I said to Kyle to go back, I told him the hit was being done. I told him this. But he said Amira was his issue, but I backed away. I ain’t the one to tell people what to do. It’s like a domino affect with this shit, Atlanta got hit and then Raphael’ dealers keep getting hit, Miami has no drugs, we keeping it in Brooklyn what we got, our shipment is being aimed at” Kyle has really pissed me off “new found me” I said to myself “ok so listen, Kalia. You know her? Detective that constantly wants me and arrests me all the time. Well she has decided to follow me, every day here. She is saying her son has Leukemia, her father is ill and she needs money. Money the law can’t give, she wants to be my informant, apprently the one you supplied is useless” Ethan laughed “she is the bitch that rattled him, she fucking did it. I see her game!” Ethan spat “I want you to go and find this story out, I want you to inavade everything. Every little detail of this bitch I want to know. Then if it does, we will go to step two and then we will make her prove herself. I want you to find out everything, I know you can. Also make sure she ain’t playing both sides, got it?” hopefully she is legit, I will kill her myself for playing “got it, you know boss. It’s good to have you back, you know that?” turning around as I heard the door close, I laughed “Kyle ain’t the one Ethan, he has never been for this. He wants the business gone but he will be dead without it, niggas don’t care” Sofia walked over to me “I know that, we stuck in it but don’t go again. Shit ain’t good” placing my hand at the side of Sofia’ face “how do I contact you again?” my thumb lightly outlined her lips “I will call you, you got two days” disconnecting the call, Sofia grabbed my hand and held my hand in hers “who is Kalia?” she is nosey “just a woman that has wanted to openly fuck me, but I ain’t do that. She erm wants to work along side me, but I need to see that is legit first. She is the one who arrests me constantly” I am being truthful with Sofia, it is th best way “that is very truthful” I don’t think she was expecting me to be so truthful “I want to be truthful with you, is Cartier asleep?” Sofia nodded her head.

I turned onto my side, looking at Sofia in bed “I should have let you put Cartier asleep so you can annoy him, you’re about to keep me up” Sofia’ lips curved up into a smile “erm, I am not sure” I reached out to her with one hand, brushing my fingers against her stomach. Sofia placed her hand over mine, looking up at Sofia’ eyes as they welled up with tears “why are you upset? Did I do something?” Sofia shook her head “it’s not that, just happy. You’re here with me” I laughed, a little nervous actually “well, that could have gone differently” shuffling closer to Sofia, I could do with some sex actually. Cupping Sofia face with my hand “but I am here with you” I whispered against her lips before I kissed them slowly, moving my hand away from the side of her face and onto her hip. Feeling Sofia grip my hand and then move her face to the side and I kissed her cheek “not right now” moving head back “mhmmm maybe next time” pressing a kiss to her forehead.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

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honeyedmilks · 7 years

Note

1-12, 14-19, 27-29, 32. 42 and 54 :D You don't have to answer them all hahaha

assiehfaefa ima answer them all! thank you so much angel!

1: favourite kdrama

let’s say that my current favourites are; the princess’ man, and jealousy incarnate!

2: least favourite kdrama

least favourite… hwarang, strong woman do bong soon, and drinking solo. i just dislike these. but if we’re talking one i like but wouldn’t have at the top of my list… then moon lovers.

3: first kdrama i watched:

it was boys over flowers!!! wow!!! the memories… the tears… so iconic… i couldn’t watch lee min ho in anything for a long time because go jyun pyo broke my heart!!!

4: last kdrama i watched:

i’m currently watching school 2017 (!!!!!!!!!!!! kim tae woon i loveth you) and also watching an oldie drama called the woman who still wants to marry. it’s based around female friendship and i’m at ep 11 and still going!

5: kdrama otp (s):

oh boy so here we go!!! in no particular order, here are some pairings i really do love/ cried over/ had lots of feelings over!!

kim shin and eun tak (i miss my sweet souls) from goblin

lee se ryung and kim seung yoo from the princess’ man

park do kyung and oh hae young from oh hae young again

pyo na ri and lee hwa shin from jealousy incarnate

do min joo and cheong song yi from my love from another star

i’m sure there are more but these are whay come to mind right now! :’)

6: kdrama notp (s)

dugfsfhdsi

wang so with tragedy and injustice!!!

7: preferred drama genre

honestly it first of all romance, but these days i love a good melodrama! romantic comedies are good too if they’re done well! i do also love a good fantasy… or saeguk, but again it depends on what kind of saeguk… drama’s about friendships… family… they can be really interesting. i’ll be honest and say my least favourite genre are workplace dramas.

8: first drama i considered my favourite:

ooh… that’s hard… let me think… i think it was reply 1988- until it crushed my pathetic heart into a million pieces.

9: favourite korean actors

ooh… gong yoo (not just because he’s a fantastic actor but he’s also such a lovely awesome guy),

lee joon gi (for his magnificent micro-expressions)

ryu jun yeol (WHEN WILL HE RETURN TO DRAMALAND???!!!)

jo jung suk (you all must see him in jealousy incarnate)

seo in guk

seo kang joon (he played my love, baek in ho)

and so ji sub!

10: favourite korean actress (es)

zamn let’s do this then!

gong hyo jin (she is sooo lovely and brilliant!!)

kim go eun (again lovely and brilliant!!!)

jun ji hyun (who doesn’t love her dramas tho)

shin min ah (i love all these talented ladies so much it’s not even funny)

yoo in nah

uee

kim hee-ae

kim seul gi

and lee sung kyung!

11: favourite kdrama cliche

ha! i honestly am such a sucker for the main leads doing sweet things like looking after the female lead when she’s hurt- even if it’s buying her medicine, looking after her when she’s drunk. just thoughtful things in general. and i like it when the female lead does the same for the male lead. like just doing lovely things for the other :(

i am also a whore for long hidden glances and petty silly jealousy or crushing babbling nonsense (not like scary jealousy tho) and honestly who doesn’t love a good hearts racing, cheeks blushing cliche moment?

when drama’s do parodies of other famous drama’s idhfud they just take the mick it’s so funny

food, everywhere, yummy ramen, yummy spicy rice cakes… yummy… yumness…

oh and a good crying scene… shed those dramatic tears my boy!!!!

12: least favourite kdrama cliche

wrist grabbing oiadhc’iuafh

MISUNDERSTANDINGS, like the real ugly kind

noble idiocy is just… it rarely works… please stop making my soul suffer…

evil mothers ;((((((

the dreaded make over

14: boys over flowers or secret garden?

boys over flowers!!!! watching secret garden makes me sightly sick now oahiduhfa the main lead :////// plus bof has lee min ho and his perm and i live for that look

15: weightlifting fairy kim bok joo or cheese in the trap?

now what cruel person… i want to say cheese in the trap just because i love baek in ho so much and it was such a thrill at the start… but i’ll have to go with weightlifting fairy… there’s more pro’s in this drama… like the fact i actually finished it when it was airing…

16: jealousy incarnate or oh my ghostess?

definitely jealousy incarnate, lee jong suk is really brilliant as lee hwa shin and even though i have to admit that i didn’t watch the side stories, and mostly only the stories of lee hwa shin and pyo nari… it’s still better than oh my ghostess in my opinion. the latter show made me uncomfortable- mostly due to the fact the main lead was falling in love with a mix of two people. it just made me a bit itchy :(( and sad :(( because then the romance is a bit of a mess

17: descendants of the sun or w: two world?

hmm.. i actually did start descendants but dihfiadhf for the life of me could not get past the first two episode, maybe it was the dramatic love song at the end of their first meeting that had me both scratching my head and stifling laughter. but i’ve heard good things about w, and did want to pick it up until i heard the ending went a bit lopsided, so to save myself disappointment, i did not watch it.

18: moonlight drawn by clouds or legend of the blue sea?

okay so this is tricky… mdbc is critically… probably a better drama but despite it’s flaws i really have to say legend of the blue sea. i watched it the whole way through, and i really love the soundtrack (which im actually listening to as i answer these) and the main characters, and it made me laugh a lot even if i did cry a little over the greatness it could’ve been :((

19: strong woman do bong soon or shopping king louie?

dsuigfiddifdfiv shopping king louie! how cute were booksil and louie ::((( so cute!!

27: favourite kdrama bromance

okay so this is an interesting question… probably the friendship between park do kyung and all his male friends from oh hae young again… their loyalty was heart warming, but grimsie and kim shin from goblin were cute friends too.

28: favourite kdrama friendship

i have a few!

oh hye won and her friend ji soo from secret love affair. i really loved their friendship, how ji soo was a pillar of support for hye won, she was a real friend.

i really truly love the friendship between the three main female leads in the woman who still wants to marry- it’s so warm.

oh hae young and her friend in oh hae young again are also very sweet, i’m really glad hae young had a friend she could talk to.

oh and the friendships between shim cheong and all her cute oddball friends in legend of the blue sea :’((( that was pure stuff right there

and let’s not forget the kids and family on the block in reply 1988, its honestly so lovely :’((

i feel like there’s almost always a sidekick friend in kdrama’s but never are they good friendships that make me feel things :( sometimes the friend is just a prop

29: favourite actor/actress duo? (one male, one female)

oooh… this is hard… if this was bollywood it would be easier because i would’ve just said kajol and sharukh khan… but here… lemme think… now that i think about it… i really liked gong hyo jin with so ji sub in the master’s sun. i also really liked park hyun sik and lim ji yeon together in high society. but otherwise… my brain is frazzled!!

how could i forget minah and namgung min in beautiful gong shim :((( they had such great chemistry

but lets be real jo jung suk and gong hyo jin in jealousy incarnate were hilarious.

32: do you watch drama’s with 30 plus episodes?

oh boy oh boy… i think i did watch one? but skipped a load of it to watch one couple… i mean i’ve thought about it? especially with father is strange… but it’s a pretty rare case. i know i’ve started some but couldn’t get through them all :(

42: favourite kdrama kiss scene

ihfr’iue ye’qewu the kisses in coffee prince… are truly something… 10/10

54: recommend 3 fluffy AF dramas

efrhiptfuohf’rgh let us see… this is hard because kdrama’s don’t like being complete fluff… but the woman who wants to marry is a wild bit of fun :((

my girlfriend is a gumiho is a really nice watch, wouldn’t call it 100% fluff because… i cried a little

oh and splash splash love is short and sweet without being too silly :’)

and i guess my only love song is a load fluff, you can enjoy its strange antics and not take it too seriously!

thank you for these lovely questions

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#replies^^^#someone save my not very decisive ass #kdrama asks #kdrama #sorry for any typos!#tracyx11 #tumbly talks: kdrama edition

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