#i just want to get my stuff done tonight

[sneezydarliing]

Close Quarters (Gen/Shin, CynoNari)

Hi um. Me after posting late to my own event. nyways this is for @hachiibun !!!!! thank you So much for your patience i hope you like this. I tried to go insp from some art you've posted so i hope its to ur liking!!!!

Cyno was familiar with Tighnari’s nose. Sensitive and easily set off, it wasn’t uncommon to witness one of his fits if you spent a day with him. His ears would twitch and flick, tail swishing with agitation, nose scrunched up against a wrist until he finally succumbed. His awareness is what led to the sinking feeling in his stomach as he watched the other. 

The two were cramped together in a small inlet, waiting for the moment to strike against a large group of enemies. They crouched side-by-side, shoulders pressed together. Cyno quietly observed, watching the furrow in Tighnari's brows, the flick of his tail, watching him scrub a gloved hand against his nose. The two locked eyes, Tighnari’s eyes red-rimmed and watery with unshed allergic tears. He worried his bottom lip against his teeth, sending a message they both knew. Tighnari needed to sneeze, and there was very little he could do to stop it.  

The specks of pollen coating every surface was the clear culprit. While neither of them were allergic, it was nearly impossible to not feel itchy with the sheer amount of it. Even Cyno, prideful of his own control, had to resist the urge to rub his irritated eyes. Tighnari, however, was fighting a losing battle. He aggressively pawed at his nose, leaving it red and angry looking. They both knew his sneezes could never go unnoticed- Tighnari’s fits were pitchy and desperate, demanding attention whether he wanted it or not. 

Cyno adjusts, freeing a hand, prepared to help if needed. Sure enough, Tighnari’s slow, controlled breath snagged, entering a desperate cresendo as he fought against the itch, battle quickly lost. Cyno watches as he crushes the release against his glove, knowing the control will not last. Tighnari’s nose is never satisfied with just one, and a wet sniffle and the crinkle in his nose confirms his theory. He gives cyno a watery look, warning him of what he already knows.

He slowly manevours around so that he's facing tighnari, ignoring his quiet hiss of “what are you doing?!” then, he brings up his hands, gently presses tighnari against his body, and locks eyes with him. Tighnari  nods, breath already stuttering. Cyno can almost feel the tickle, watching his nose wrinkle as he brings up another glove to scrub at it. His breath takes on an almost desperate whine, and he buries himself into Cyno’s shoulder

As it came to a peak, Cynos hands wrapped around hjs head, pressing him further into him. The fabric against his nose set him over the edge, as he tries desperately to silence the much-needed release. 

“h’NGT! h-N’’gXT-h’NdT’iew-! hhI- hN’GT-hH’NDGT-ieww!” Tighnari panted against the rapid releases, and Cyno felt a dampness in his shoulder. “Done?” he whispered, knowing Tighnari’s sensitive ears would pick it up. Tighnari lets out another whine-like breath, hitching and stuttering. “I don’Hht-! Don’t know how many more I.. nGHT-! snF! Can hold back..” he mutters, congestion clear in his voice. 

Cyno presses his hands against the back of Tighnari’s head and presses him further against him. “Let them out. It’ll be okay.” 

Tighnari opens his mouth to object, but with his loss of focus, the need for release overcomes him. He buries himself in the crook of Cyno’s neck, each sneeze more desperate and itchy sounding than the last. 

“hIH-iSHhiew-iShh-i’tSCh’iew-! hAh.. hiDT’sCHh’u! a’TSCHh-sCHh’ieww-! n’GTCh-! iSCHh’u!” Tighnari gasps for breath against Cyno as he watches their targets warily pack up their camp and leave, made nervous by the sudden activity. He releases a deep breath, but there’s no use in being angry. It was an unavoidable outcome. He releases his grip on his companion, trying to plan a next move as he listens to Tighnari’s wet sniffles as he attempts to clean himself up. 

“I’m sorry, Cyno.” He says after a few moments, voice thick and raspy from strain. Cyno shakes his head in response. “It was bound to happen. I’m sure they’ll return.” He stands, dusting the dirt from his clothes, and offers a hand to Tighnari, who takes it after another itchy sneeze aimed into his shoulder. “You need to go home and wash the pollen off.” 

#snz stuff #snz #ive had this done for a few days but ive been forgetting to post it sobbing #ok so i'm really sorry this is so late life has genuinelly been SO hetic lately. its a little better rn but not much #i want to post more fics but im so busy and when i have time its just. relaxing for once alas #anyways i hope you like this!!! i had fun writing it lol ive never done a scenario like this even though its a snzblr classic LOL #posting this and then running off for a while because i am in the middle of getting stuff done #dont like that getting this posted was more of crossing smth else off my checklist tonight than being like omgg im gonna post this bc i thi #k its good but alas..... tis life

[orchideae]

🎄🥳🥂Merry Christmas, everyone! If you're like me and you celebrate the holiday tonight, enjoy the festivities, the foods and the presents! I hope you guys have an absolutely wonderful evening and/or night!!

#[ i wanted to get a bit of stuff done today; but i had too much prepping to do for the big family meal tonight. ] #[ and also honestly; the excitement has had me unable to focus! i've always loved the celebration here with my mother's family. ] #[ i hope to get some stuff done tomorrow instead. ] #[ have a lovely day/night guys!! ] #[ and us frenchies celebrate it on the eve; so here we are. ☺️😊 ] #[ it's almost 8 so it's almost time to leave. so have a good evening you guys! depending on food coma-- i may check in when back. ] #[ but no promises. ] #[ also my apologies to people waiting on discord! it's just been hectic. ] #[ ooc. ] don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

I so desperately want to write but i have to save up all of my energy for my stupid classes

#ugh #praying i get all my stuff done tonight #or at the very least most of it #because i just want to chill this weekend

[arowrath]

im so fucking tired it's unreal i dont want to Do anything i just want to lie in bed for the rest of my life.

#text #trying not to think about how fucked i am if i fail this semester. w hich is looking likelier and likelier with every missed assignmetn #also apparentlyu my gov professor sent ellen a rly nice email sayinfg that she could tell im trying and that she appreciates that #and she emaield me saying smiliar and. :(((<3 god. #guy who cries really hard when authority figures are kind towards him #i need to just. get stuff done i need to just keep trying #but im so so exhausted #i want to go to sleep but its room check week and idk if my RA is doing room checks Tonight or later this week #i dont want to be in here when they do them bc im anxious #but i dont want to be in public either #and i cant be outaide bc its very cold. #well ig i could but i wouldnt be able to be on my puter bc my fingers would get so cold you understand #i need to find a dark quiet private room to hang out in that isny my room and theres nobody else in there

[foxgloveinspace]

fox your tags on the falcon/pigeon video are sending me

i can’t wait for the rest of your fic because those tags are going to haunt me. i need to witness how falcon/pigeon coded sam and rinzler are (i still want to say rizzler every time i see his name)

ok, but the thing is, is that this is totally how i see them, in the sense that Sam does some dumb shit, and kinda flirts without expectations, but it WORKS. It works on Rinzler, and he's just stoically standing there.

but also, in this annalogy of Sam being a pigeon and Rinzler being a hawk, the pigeon is a god.

So a god is doing dumb things (like trying to take off on a lightjet without knowing how to make it work completely) with witty one liners and it's working.

#hihi!!! #friend exie!! #also like.... I think my fic is the only one you've read for tron yeah? #there are so many fun anatomy things I get to work with next chapter. *rubs my gay little hands together* theres a lot of agreed on #headcanon for things and I can't wait to play around with stuff #yeah I have smut stuff planned for the next part but I am also so so so excited to put my own spins on how I see Grid society and stuff. #I haven't started the next part just yet. I was actually thinking of starting tonight #it was hard cause of those migraines I was having but I hope to get started soon #I have vague plans. But I also hope to just..... let the words flow like I did with part one really #ok I'll be done rambling now! #also if you want fic recs for the ship let me know? Some of my all time favorite fics are Tron and SamTron fics. #idk if your actually into it or not and it's absolutely a-ok to not be into it haha I just. there's some amazing fics out there. #ok ONE recc. It's only vaguely SamTron. but if you want a REALLY nice angsty bittersweet fic that is from Alan's POV #it's Mea Culpa by 2019-2020 (EnglishLanguage) #I rec most everything by EnglishLanguage. but this one and Genesis especially #ok NOW I'm done rambling.

[redpiperfox]

But mainly, and really:

#red's week in music #STORYTIME WITH RED GATHER ROUND KIDDOS! #was at kids club tonight and went in knowing little 8 year olds mom had her baby this morning and lil girl was now big sis if two #and knew she hadnt come from home bc her hair was a mess of someone who didnt know curls trying to do it lol #shes generally emotional and dramatic but we can all see that shes a lil more so tonight. understandably. lotsa change #well she kinda hinges on this one thing of not getting the verses said to earn a jewel bc she wasnt able to say them-- totally fine! we'll #practice and get them later! but shes distraught bc she worked on them with mum and wont get jewel so i keep telling her when we'll work on #them together and when ill listen to her and we can get it done. cool. then lesson time shes up and down sniffly and the lesson says smth #about childbirth-- bursts into disarray. i ask her if she wants to step out and we blow her nose and she keeps talking about the verse so i #tell her solutions for that and then shes working herself up so i work thru calming down and she goes from #“i think im mad” to “mom would let me do what i want!” and i know the real issue isnt the verse but thats what shes telling me so... #adult shes staying with cautiously steps in and she calms down to tell me “its not the verse... i think i miss my mom” #oh my heart i know honey i give her a hug and we talk about the sleeover shes going to have and when shes going to see mom #and shes sleeping next to lil sis so shes going to give sis a big hug and tell her theyre going to see mom in the morning #and then i ask her if she wants to go back and she does and i just hold her and hug her the whole time #i give her another squeeze when she leaves and tell her to enjoy her sleepover #her friend shes staying with i should not did a very sweet of coming over and saying “hey lookit this new book i got do you wanna color it #with me maybe?“ which was such an emotionally mature thing for her and to see lil kiddo cheer up warmed me #teachers we debriefed and talked about kids going thru stuff at home and not being able to tell and process their emotions and stuff #and then i shared with mum on the ride back and she goes “yup. lil toddler will just miss mom-- its trauma at this age. this is why i #panicked and called my mother to come for your sis's birth bc dad said he could handle you but my heart couldnt for what you would go thru.“ #i was six when my sister was born. my grandma being there before consistently made me giddly excited in that time waiting for dad to bring #us to the hospital. #anyway my heart was full and im praying extra hard for two lil girls in a sleepover missing their mom tonight. #red's personal sitcom #Spotify

[ghostennit]

I'm so excited to pull out my vroid tonight for stream.

I have Walmart reactive lighting, throw redeems, headpats.. her mouth is actually synced to mine/my voice and looks pretty good actually. I've gotten used to using her and moving my head around and making more exaggerated expressions for the motion capture to pick up. Totally used to my keybinds too!

I was going to wait until my Anni stream but I'm too excited. So instead, I'll just have more stuff ready for it. This week I'll be working on more elaborate expressions (without blendshapes or unity) and adding an alt outfit. I'm really looking forward to updating her over time.

#im just sooooo excited #im not done setting some stuff up tho so all of this might not be available tonight #i mainly wanted the reactive lighting for tonight #my reactive lighting is kinda jank tho and im having problems with discord connecting to patreon to get the streamfx dynamic mask lmao #ennitxt

[tvrningout]

i'm gonna shower and see if that helps, but forgive me if i retire early tonight! this headache is being a menace and it's making it really hard to concentrate ;n;

#it's making all my words sound like nonsense to me too so the whole time i'm wondering if i'm making sense whatsoever #hopefully tomorrow before/after my korean final i can get some stuff done but it might be best that i just relax tonight #i haven't been sleeping very well at all bc i never wanna go to sleep at a decent hour lately and that's bc i feel so busy ;;;; #i want extra time to myself you know #anyway anyway!! fingers crossed that hot waters helps this headache go away!! #get ready to ramble | ooc

[sureuncertainty]

hopefully it's just tonight but i haven't written at all in the last couple of days and i tried again tonight and it didn't work AGAIN i just can't get myself to write idk sometimes i really feel like the sequel to silence agenda is literally never ever going to actually get written and there's no point in even trying

#like i go thru phases where i'm all excited about it and they never last and i NEVER fucking finish anything with it #like literally ever #i have started to write this novel literally like 4 or 5 times now at this point? #and i can't get it done ever #since 2020 i've been working on it for almost three years #i've been making steady progress on tmtou i literally rewrite silence agenda like every fucking year #and yet i fucking can't get this story written #and idk how much of the problem is me how much of the problem is US and how much of the problem is my motivation levels and stuff #idk idk i think i'm just In It tonight and i'll probably feel differently later #it goes in these cycles #but idk man for awhile i was REALLY CONVINCED that this was gonna be the Time that i actually got this book written #i have the story! i have it! i just need to make it! and idk how!!! #i try and then a week later i can't #and my brain is hyperfixating on other things (idk why i decided to reread aftg) so i just Can't #and i do wanna get silence agenda published soon so i wanna focus on that #but i feel like i can't deliver on this sequel i feel like i can't even write it #idk i've never spent THIS LONG and gotten THIS MANY DRAFTS out of a book without being even like. close to the halfway point #i should finish it! i want to! i want to want to! but i fucking CAN'T #part of it is me part of it is the fact that it's hard to write when kat's not around and she hasn't been lately #idk i really thought i was gonna be able to do it this time. but apparently not #idk when i'll learn #that i can't write this fucking book #win rambles

[inmirova]

I have a lot to say about DE giving me the tools to move forward after my fiance left this past December, about the ways that Harry's mental health issues and financial situation and many more aspects of his lived experience mirror my own. No one wants to hear all of that though so instead here's my "I wanted you back at first but now I really really don't/it's all my fault but it's actually all your fault" playlist, for whichever stage of the 6-year-long i mean three-month-long I mean... process you're in. We can turn from the ruin, for the working class.

#btw if you see this i blocked you i dont want you here and you need to respect that bc you gave up the right to my feelings when you left #disco elysium #you know during The Dream when you say 'this is so grotesque'? that. #i hate that scene so much because i had never actually done it til after the break up and it was. not the same as our last conversation but #when harry kisses her? they kissed me as they left and i just. didnt want to do that. #and i kept saying the wrong things that day because i didnt want them back but they thought i did and i just wanted to scream #this is so grotesque!!! it really fucking is! #anyway ive been playing this while i get rid of most of the stuff they gave me #i love catharsis <3 but that is why ive been gone lol from here and my side blog! we are doing a fire to burn the paper stuff tonight #so ill be back tomorrow Cleansed #Spotify

[secondsonaym]

Btw I have been a lot more chatty over on twitter and stuff as far as just. Me talking about general goings-on and stuff goes. More or less talking into the air that I would consider too brief to really post here, so if you like my rambles, then feel free to go look.

#it's where a lot of my doodles have been going because i feel kind of. #Bad. posting too much stuff in-between the big writing blocks #especially since the past few days most of my energy was Eaten and thus i could only doodle for a bit #but writing will hopefully pick up soon so #gonna try and get a little bit done tonight before i sleep i write better just before i want to pass out fsr lol #so all this to say i'm not dead or inactive or anything i just #have moved my inability to shut up over to another site and am only providing the actual Good Shit here lately

[byanyan]

main verse updates, developments, & additional headcanons

ㅤthanks to lena practically dragging them into it, byan is on the track team that she coaches at school. though they initially weren't all that interested, it's something they've come to enjoy a lot (even if they sometimes have to stop running for a little coughing fit) — they've always enjoyed physical activity, always enjoyed sports, but have never been particularly cooperative when it came to team sports (and always broke rules and got too violent when they'd try martial arts or boxing), so track suits them quite well. they quickly became one of the top performing team members and, though things were certainly rough in the beginning with byan being very abrasive and uninterested in their teammates, they've actually ended up pretty friendly with most of them over the months since they joined.

ㅤalthough they never planned to go to college, having zero interest in continuing in school once they were finally out of the hell of high school, they've come around on it a bit. this is mostly thanks to both lena and sol's encouragement and helping them realize they can go to learn something they actually care about — fashion design. almost entirely because of these two, byan is planning to apply to the local community college and is in the process of building a portfolio of their work for this purpose.

ㅤbecause of this plan, they're slowly becoming a (slightly) better student: attending class more regularly (though still skipping fairly often), paying a bit more attention in class, and even completing and handing in homework. they're actually on track to graduate now rather than flunking out. they may not graduate with flying colours, but it's enough for a diploma and that's all they care about.

ㅤjust because they're doing better doesn't mean that things are perfect, though. they still get discouraged a lot in their struggle with their (still undiagnosed) dyslexia, general inferiority complex, and overall difficulty in the typical school setting. it's not uncommon to hear them ranting about changing their mind about college, see them throw a textbook across the room, or catch them straight up burning their homework out of frustration. if they're feeling particularly awful and discouraged, they have a tendency to disappear for a few days, get themself into even more trouble than usual, get themself into more fights, and numb themself with drugs and/or alcohol. they come back around eventually, but sometimes it takes a bit of coaxing.

ㅤthough they still technically live in the group home, they spend almost no time there anymore, only really stopping by for food or appointments (when they don't blow them off, anyway). most nights they're either crashing on lena's couch or at sol's place, and even most of their belongings have been moved and split between these two locations.

ㅤat this point, the caretakers at the group home have more or less given up on trying to keep an eye on them or expecting any different behaviour from them. they've been in this particular home for several years at this point and, with their eighteenth birthday fast approaching (and with it the time where they'll be unable to stay there any longer), not much point is seen in trying to change anything anymore. byan has always been difficult to keep a handle on, efforts at controlling them to any extent met with aggressive rebellion, and it isn't seen as worth the hassle anymore. at least if they're off doing their own thing all the time, it means they're causing less trouble around the home.

ㅤthe boy they share a room with in the home, si-u, still covers for them a lot of the time, telling the caretakers and staff that oh yeah, byan was totally here last night. byan suspects he mostly does this because he likes having a room to himself, but it results in them being hounded a little less all the same, so they appreciate it.

ㅤof course, just because their future is looking a little less grim doesn't mean that everything has changed. they might have a boyfriend now, might have found themself some actual friends and even some familial figures, but they're still byan. they still love to go out and get themself into trouble, still love to fight, steal, and cause havoc for others, and still have a tendency to get themself in over their head or disappear without warning when their ptsd acts up. things are looking up and they might be feeling more fulfilled but, when it comes down to it, they're still them, and they still have a long way to go.

#feels like i'm missing something but this is most of what i've wanted to put out there #i want to make more of an effort at like. involving byan's development thanks to other muses consistent across the verse #i want it to have actual impact on them as a character no matter who i'm interacting with #i want their relationships with other muses to matter!! #i want to be able to mention the important people in their life in threads with others!!! #i want stuff to matter i want it all to intertwine i'm done with keeping everyone separate #and i'm done putting byan back to their default state when interacting with someone new!!!!! #their main verse especially will develop as their relationships with others develop and help them to grow and change as a person & characte #so here it is!!! this is where their main verse is at now thank u for ur time #......i'm actually having so much fun getting way to into talking about their verses though #so i think i'm gonna do one for their college verse & perhaps the future verse beyond that where they're an Adult adult too #possibly tonight while it's like. right here buzzing around in the front of my head. #idk bc i wanted to do some replies too but. we'll see we'll see i'm just rolling with it today #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ headcanon ⋮ danger in the fabric of this thing i made. #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ verse: modern ⋮ come on up / bring the pain. #━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ verse details.

[todayisafridaynight]

what's also great about the ichi watch is that the gold and red goes well with the arakawa-inspo outfit i have..

#snap chats #aka the outfit im wearing right now BYE #its so funny that i have really accidentally stolen his clothes. like idk what to tell you #owning a grey suit and a three-piece black suit's commonplace i really did just need the shirt LMAO #did eventually find a scarf buried in my closet so i even have that on lock down 😩 perfect for fall ig LOL #POINT IS i do have that gold bracelet plus the gold-buckled belt but also the red shoes.. that i and everyone around me love.. #its perfect goku idk what else you want from me.. was meant to be even #what I want tho is food but i dont have time to make rice and im going out to eat in the city after class anyway #anyway love how i know im gonna preorder it but i havent yet because I Dont Know i like waiting until the last second i guess #ive reasoned with myself only to get the watch since as cute as the bag and wallet are #the wallet i have now is perfectly fine- plus my sister gave it to me. and i dont need a bag enough to warrant getting it #love how i never even considered the jacket LMAO LIKE ITS A CUTE JACKET just.. not $200 cute.. #that's what my puffer is tho.. dont tell anyone-- #ANYWAY YEAH <3 once i get the ichi watch i can stop wearing this bitch ass cringe ass watch my mom gave me #i just hope changing the battery in the watch wont be a pain down the line cause i dont think its solar powered WHOOP.. #it'll be worth it to me.... ok bye im gonna stare at the wall until i have to leave for class #i have all my commission stuff done for now and i wanna rest from drawing for the rest of the day. maybe. #might stream tonight but i also might be drunk LMAO we'll see #if i stream uhhhhhh dude i dont even know.... funny y3 stream ???? drawing stream ???? #we'll see what happens anyway BYE

[dragonanne]

Just a little self-portrait that I doodled this afternoon. Been feeling worn down the last few days by all the little things that are piling up. Prayers would be very much appreciated. Prayers to be able to knock all the stuff off my to-do list that I need to, and prayers to be able to get some rest and peace from the feeling of being overwhelmed by Stuff. And maybe prayers that I could get ahead on some of my work so that I'm not feeling this way every couple of weekends 😂

#i just feel like there's SO MUCH that I need to do #I'm cleaning out and moving my art stuff into my own little studio which is AMAZING #but the time I'm having to spend cleaning is time I feel like I should be working on other things #and then there's client work and teaching stuff like class prep that takes time #and I need to get back with my editor and talk about the notes she made on the JT manuscript #and make revisions #and finish up the last few illustrations #and move the rest of my art stuff down to the studio #and try to figure out where the spiders are hiding in my room (i wish i was joking) #and I'm even to the point that the fact that I have 4 books in my currently reading list on goodread is stressing me out #because it feels like a sort of to-do list that I need to get items checked off of #like????why is that stressing me out?!?!?! #and then there's another thing that i don't want to get into but it's also on my mind and weighing me down #on the plus side my pastor's message tonight was really good and definitely something i needed to hear #it was over psalm 52 and how David thanked God for dealing with a problem even before He had done it #David knew God would handle it and that He kind of already had but David just hadn't gotten to that point in time yet #i like that #God is outside of our perception of time and He's already taken care of our problems #even if we haven't caught up to that point in time yet #that comforted me #the ramblings of a dragon #prayer request

[fakeoutbf]

.

#i have a lot of work right now just bc it’s the end of the month and that’s how things are #and my boss sent me a ton of stuff to do today and it feels like i got nothing done #and it’s fine it doesn’t matter i’m just overwhelmed and frustrated #but then i get to the car right and mind that i just got the text that my dad’s just arrived #and it took me a minute to exit the building #and there was someone wanting to get out of the parking lot and my dad was in the way so i just made a tiny comment about it #and i immediately got scolded for making him wait a minute while i was finishing packing up and exiting the building #A MINUTE #NOT EVEN #bc i said i’d just seen the text while i was packing #and now i wanna cry bc i’m so overwhelmed and now scolded for something so fucking stupid #does someone wanna like idk get me ice cream and some cuddles?? i just wanna cry #and there’s a fob show tonight but ngl i just wanna get home #cry about bs and go to sleep #my eyes hurt so bad

[semercury]

I don't want to be at work I want to be home writing some silly little words.

#stuff sarah says #jk id probably be working on an s+ run in re/4/r #(tryna not get picked up by tags) #but we finished the cle/on movie/mini series last night and it breathed new life into my fic idea #tbh i was sad there was just crumbs but i think thats all any shipper gets with this series #but i wanted to write this fic before i work more on my cringe fic bc its short #and i love instant gratification #and i have a title. its some fu/n. lyrics if that tells you the mood... #''if youre right here why do i miss you so much?'' #and with ''now i just wait for you to talk to me but you wont even look at me baby'' as some ~flavor text~ #came up with the fic by being like ''they should get smoothies together :)'' with the bestie #and now im gonna make it sad #babe if you see this i def will send you snippits as i write the rough draft #anyway. i dont want to be at work for a lot of reasons #it feels weird. theres too many people here tonight #and i think we're gonna get done super early with stuff we needed to do? #idk. id rather be home #i dont want to work anymore ever. i think i should be paid for having amazing takes on fictional characters #and being mildly interesting to talk to and being bad at video games but still having a good time #that last one is a real talent. real gamers take their L's #anyway