#im just saying that dean is like. he's a caretaker at the heart of himself. he soothes.

[sobsicles]

i don't know if any of you know this, but dean would absolutely go into full crisis mode if cas cried. like, im talking, the waterworks and trembling chin and not the happy kind of tears but the deep, achy ones that he can't hold back. after the initial frozen moment, dean would be a wreck instantly. a burst of motion and, "no, no, don't do that. please don't do that. come on, man, please don't cry," and half-panicking and half-soothing, or trying to. all reservations dean has would be swept away by cas' tears in a heartbeat. he'd throw it all out the window and touch cas all over, rubbing his shoulders, holding his hands, shamelessly begging cas to stop. he'd be so lost too, like dammit what do i do, who do i fight, how can i make sure this literally never happens again? he'd be like one of those husbands who can get into a screaming match with their spouses until their spouse breaks down into tears, and then the husband is like, ok ok ok i take it all back, you win, please stop, for the love of god please stop, do you want tea, hm? you wanna lay down and cuddle? im sorry, im awful, what do you want? you can have whatever you—

#so basically what im saying is if cas had literally cried in the midst of sorrow anywhere between s4-15 destiel woulda been canon sooner #like. not even necessarily out of manipulation reasons either. #dean would just see cas upset and crying and be like: hm. do not like this. will burn the world down to keep it from ever happening again #cas obviously isnt a huge crier. but just imagine for a second that he had actually broken down and started crying in one of their arguments #like he never would bc he's pissed more often than he's not and he's not an angry crier (like dean lowkey is) #but if he DID dean would have freaked the fuck out immediately #mans would have stumbled over himself so hard to make it stop #and he would have felt awful and shitty and hated himself more too obviously but like. #initially he'd be like: oh jesus christ cas. fuck im sorry. please don't do that. that's not fair please don't— #and dear god if someone ELSE made cas cry. Local Deranged Man Shoots Someone For Making His Spouse Cry—literal headline #im just saying that dean is like. he's a caretaker at the heart of himself. he soothes. #he tells jokes to his little brother to take the sting out of patching up his boo-boos. he tries to feed people he loves and make em laugh #like. he's a caretaker. he wants to be soothing. he wants to be warm and home and never cause pain (and hates himself for doing it so often) #so cas + tears would just send him into crisis mode immediately. he'd bend over backwards to make it better #i just think if cas had cried in like. s12 maybe. just randomly or whatever. dean would have been like #ok ok ok what's wrong come here what can i do what do you want you can have anything you want #like that man is WEAK for cas on a good day. on a day that cas cries??? ajaksks dean would hit his knees fuckin PLEADING for him to stop #he'd grip his hands and squeeze em and talk in a really high-pitched frantic voice and just flutter around trying to fix the problem #im saying that cas only getting to cry in joy in frony of dean—which is DIFFERENT—is a crime actually #gruff dean mindlessly rubbing his hands up and down cas' arms. kinda just holding him and cracking jokes to try and get him to laugh #or jesus. dont imagine cas crying during the divorce arc bc Angry Dean Winchester would have been... #oh he would have been soooo mad oh my god. #like: come the fuck on. cut that shit out. seriously cas just fucking—just stop it. just. cas just. goddAMMIT #or worse. cas crying when they like had their unofficial breakup and he was like. oh im gonna leave and dean was silent #you bet your sweet ass that dean would have opened his mouth then. probably out of anger still. but he would have still told him to stop #bc that man is weak and Cannot handle it #spn rewrite where cas is a crier. dean's whipped by his tears. they're still not dating but dean folds like a lawnchair every time cas cries #anyways. this may or may not be bc of a fic im writing. not very many ppl write cas crying and i know why. but it's founded this time #destiel #sobs says things

[suckerfordeansfreckles]

I got one! Um, cas calling Dean late at night cause he was sick, and dean was worried, and cas just wants some comfort, and it might just devolve cuz dean just can't help his love of cas and his growly sick voice . . . And cas may have already known that lol.

Soup & Syrup on AO3

Word count: 1.548 words

Rating: General Audience

Some tags: soft boys, best friends to lovers, sick Cas, AU, gentle caretaker Dean, getting together, no real kisses though because Cas is SICK

Note: @ladygotsoul I hope you like this, love, and it made you feel as soft and happy as it made my own currently sick (and possibly using this fic to project and wish lol) ass. I adore you

“Hello, Dean,” Cas says, as soon as the call connects.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean mumbles into the speaker, sounding soft and half-asleep. “Fuck, you don’t sound so good.”

“Yeah, it’s—” he has to break off into a coughing fit, returning to the phone with his voice sounding even raspier. And it speaks volumes that even he himself notices it. “It’s gotten worse.”

He started feeling sick two days ago, throat raw and hurting, every part of his body in pain as if he’ll burn up with fever any second. Then he had to cancel their weekly study date in the library this afternoon, to stay home and take a quick nap that accidentally ended up four hours long and left him groggy and sweaty and weird.

Dean has been sending him texts, five since he cancelled earlier, and as soon as Cas felt awake and present enough to respond, he called.

This is where they are now, around 1 a.m. on a Saturday. He didn’t really stop to look at the clock before he called Dean, but — well. He was just hoping Dean would be awake, maybe out with friends. He was just hoping that maybe, maybe, Dean would come by and dote a little on him. Just because having his best friend around always makes him feel better. Not because he craves Dean’s presence, his palm on Cas’ forehead and his hands tucking him in beneath his blanket. Absolutely not.

“— over? Cas?” Dean speaks against his ear, low and urgent, and Cas realizes that he hasn’t been listening at all during the past few moments.

“Sorry?” he rasps. “I spaced out for a bit.”

“How are you feeling?” he asks, and this time it’s soft, but still somewhat urgent.

“I feel a little better, spent most of the evening asleep and drinking tea. I’m just… groggy and weird. And my cough isn’t going away,” Cas says. Maybe pouts, but Dean can’t see that, so he’s good for now.

“I have some cough syrup at home. You want me to come over and bring it?” Dean shoots back immediately, no hesitation in his voice.

“It’s way too late, but thank you. Maybe tomorrow you cou—” his voice breaks in the middle of his sentence, and that hurts his throat so much, that he falls into another coughing fit. He tries to cover it by pressing his phone against his sweater-covered stomach and coughing into the crook of his arm, but as soon as his lungs have calmed down and he pulls his phone back to his ear to restart his sentence, Dean interrupts.

“I’m coming over,” he says, worried and determined. “I’m picking up soup and bringing the syrup. You need anything else?”

Cas is stunned into a few seconds of silence, can’t help the way his heart clenches in his chest with happiness and something way too close to the desperate love he has been suppressing for months, now. “I — Thank you, Dean. That — You’re amazing. Maybe you could bring a change of clothes and… stay over, tonight?”

“Sure,” Dean breathes. “Okay, be there in 15. Don’t fall asleep on me.”

And before Cas can reply anything at all, Dean ends the call and Cas is left alone with his thoughts.

He realizes, suddenly, how disgusting he currently is. He rips open the windows in his bedroom and living room, hopes for a breeze that will bring in some fresh air, and hops into his shower — hoping that his downstairs neighbors won’t hate him for all the noise at 1:27 a.m.

When he steps out of the shower after a quick scrubbing and the cool air hits him, he starts shivering like crazy. It doesn’t seem to matter how long he uses his towel to rub himself dry, how he uses his blow-dryer for the first time in ages or that he puts on sweatpants and two pairs of socks and his coziest sweater, he’s still shaking when he sinks down on his couch and wraps a blanket around himself. At least he isn’t smelling so bad anymore. Just in case Dean feels like giving im a hug, or something.

Cas is fighting sleep again, head lolling back against the headrest of the couch, when Dean arrives and Cas hears him unlock the front door.

Dean switches on the lights as he steps inside and closes the door behind himself, and as soon as Cas managed to blink his eyes open in the bright light, he finds Dean slipping out of his shoes, a soft smile on his lips and a plastic bag in his hand.

“Hey there,” he says, pulling off his jacket and closing the distance between them to sink down on the couch next to Cas, one leg pulled up so he’s facing Cas.

“Hello,” Cas rasps, sitting up so he can look at Dean.

“I got some chicken broth and this vegetable thing, wasn’t sure what you’d want.” Dean pulls the containers from the bag, sets them down on the table and leans back again. “When was the last time you had some food?”

“I had some cereal for breakfast today, but  mostly I just… didn’t feel hungry at all. I could eat now, though. I take the vegetable thing and you can have chicken,” he says, trying to suppress a smile at the way Dean lights up with relief.

“Awesome,” Dean laughs, and then he’s up and rummaging through Cas’ kitchen for spoons.

They eat in silence, straight from the plastic containers, sitting side by side and gently bumping elbows every now and then. When they are done, Dean grabs Cas’ spoon and fills it with the cough syrup, going as far as raising it up to Cas’ lips so he can slurp it up in an, unfortunately, very unattractive way that has both of them snorting a little.

“Thank you,” Cas says. “Seriously, for everything.”

“Dude, of course. You sounded — I mean, honestly, you still don’t sound so good. All… growly,” he blushes a little, and Cas can’t do anything but find him unreasonably delightful.

“Yeah?”

“Yes,” Dean clears his throat. “Growly and raspy. Um. And with the red nose and flushed cheeks.”

“You like that?” Cas can’t help but ask, and he’ll just blame this bluntness on the raising fever later on.

Dean blushes even harder, a lovely shade of crimson that has his eyes looking impossibly greener. “I mean —I like your voice plenty enough, when you’re healthy and feeling good.”

“You do?” Cas grins, voice pitched even lower, and he can’t help but laugh at the way Dean shivers and sinks into the couch a little deeper. “Do you wanna watch something?” he asks, so Dean can deflect in that way he always likes to do.

“Sure, yeah,” he coughs, eyes averted. He gets up and starts Netflix on the tv, starting up season one of Brooklyn 9/9, Cas’ most favorite comfort show. When he sinks back on the couch, it’s a little closer by Cas’ side.

They watch for a little while before Cas starts to shiver again, so Dean wanders off to get Cas’ blanket and switch off the lights. When he returns to the couch, Cas is stretched out along the edge. “Would you… hold me?” he asks, raspy and honestly quite miserable.

Dean looks down at him a little hesitant for a few long seconds, but then he smiles wide and determined, blurts “sure,” and snuggles down between Cas and the back of the couch and carefully wraps his arms around Cas’ middle. “This okay?” he asks, pulling the soft blanket up around them.

“Mhm,” Cas sighs softly, “very much so.” He melts back against Dean’s chest, and feels Dean’s heart pick up speed just like his own is doing. “This is nice. I’ve been… hoping for this.”

“Yeah?” Dean asks, breathless and quiet. His arms tighten around Cas’ waist, head tipping down until his nose is buried in Cas’ wild hair. “Me too. Didn’t really think it’d happen this way, but… I will not complain.”

Cas turns in his arms, until he can look up at his face, and his stomach feels all warm and fuzzy. “I adore you,” he says, and Dean’s lips stretch into the cutest smile ever.

“I adore you, too,” Dean whispers back, but when he leans down, Cas ducks away so his lips land on Cas’ forehead instead of against his own lips.

“I’m sorry,” he rumbles. “But as much as I want this, I’m not gonna get you sick, too. You can kiss me all you want as soon as whatever-this-is is finally over, though.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. As much as you want,” Cas mumbles, and then he buries his head against Dean’s shoulder and unabashedly breathes in his woodsy, leathery smell for the very first time ever.

Maybe they end up not watching any tv at all. Maybe Cas falls asleep buried against Dean’s shoulder in mere seconds. Maybe they spend all of the weekend wrapped up on the couch together, only interrupted by Dean cooking some food and brewing tea and feeding Cas cough syrup.

Maybe, just maybe, Cas falls impossibly harder for his best friend during those few days cooped up together — and tells him so by the end of the weekend.

Tag list: @planetahmane  @justyourordinaryfangirl @winchester-cas @castielinparadise @trxye-sxvxn @runtosleepdreamer @Destielhoneybee  @breathingdestiel @wellofwoes @xxgoldensnowflake @dshelley @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @robotsnchicks @jemariel  @reallyelegantsharkfish  @mellomish  @frecklessaver   @jasminrogue  @skittles-rainbow-cat  @Insecureadult  @fpwoper  @imbiowaresbitch  @destielsangel  @elaspn @didnt-survive-twist-and-shout @mercenarydestiel    @a-pastel-pan   @7faerielights  @kathrinerose  @nerd-litteraire  @wingsandimpalas  @casbean  @miasif @petrichoravellichor @trenchcoatsandfreckles @sleephawhoneedsit @vibraniumarm @youreabadliar @inlovewithsaturn @super-powerful-queen-slayyna @brangaene @all-or-nothing-baby @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @error-name-not-in-this-dimension @elizaeverafter@letofarrell @apieceofurmind @notfunnydean @winchester-ofthe-lord @love-neve-dies @korppikasvo @imafluffyjellybean @carry-on-my-wayward-hunter

If you want to be added to - or removed from - the tag list, just let me know with a quick message

#best friends to lovers #best friends #soft boys #sick cas #sick castiel #gentle dean #caretaker dean #fanfic #ficlet #my writing #destiel #deancas #getting together #first kiss #but not really #forehead kisses #cuddles #snuggles #my words

[missjackil]

Winsecurities

I have no doubt in my mind that Sam and Dean love eachother in every human way possible. This is in no way to say one loves the other more than the other, but to just have a look around Sam and Dean’s relationship and see where and possibly why, they are insecure sometimes with each other. 

Anyone reading this that knows me, knows I love both of these boys. I do favor Sam but I have no lowkey or highkey hate for Dean... he’s my buddy and a good dude and just as deserving of love and happiness as Sam is. With that said, it may appear sometimes in this post that Im dumping on one, or blaming him for something unnecessarily, but Im not, Im just making an honest observation.

Since this is about Sam and Dean’s insecurities, this is going to be a long post. So bag a lunch, get comfy, and click the cut if you feel like reading.

Sam and Dean are the most selfless people I know. They’re not selfish men at all, though both displayed some selfishness as kids, but thats normal. They’;ve both grown into men more than willing to put others before themselves, and sacrifice everything for the greater good. However they do have a selfshness when it comes to each other, and this fans the flames of their insecurities. 

If you could ask either of them “Do you love your brother?” Both would say “Yes” before you finished the sentence, but if you were to ask either “Does your brother love you?” They might pause for a second before you get the “Yes”. In their hearts they know it as surely as the sun rises in the morning, but in their heads, sometimes they’re conflicted. 

Sam has an irrational fear of Dean replacing him. He needs to be everything to Dean and doesnt like when others seem to take his place. We dont really even see this until s8 and the show has been chipping at it ever since. Dean has an irrational fear of losing Sam. Either by choice or by death. Dean defines himself as Sam’s caretaker, and doesnt want a life that Sam isnt in. I say these fears are irrational in the sense that neither should be fearing it anymore, not in the sense that the fear has never been warrented. We just recently learned that Dean still fears that Sam is going to decide to leave him someday. 

I believe that Sam has always loved his place in Dean’s world. The precious little brother that Dean protects without argument. His best friend, confidant, the one who always has his back and fully trusts to have his own back. Sam loves that Dean would die for him, so Sam would die for Dean just the same. There have been times though, that Sam has felt smothered. He’s even said so, but he just wants space to grow and breathe, and be Sam, and not only Dean’s little brother, so Sam has seperated himself from Dean at times, and Dean takes it like Sam doesnt need or appreciate him. 

I believe that Dean thinks about Sam first in everything. He depends on him to be his best friend and confidant, to have his back and save him when he needs saving, but Dean likes to surround himself with friends, family and allies, and Sam sometimes takes it as though he’s expendable in Dean’s world. Sam and Dean are each other’s spouces, in every sense of the definition that matters. They are two very different people but one single unit.

Dean’s insecurities with Sam came to our attention very early in the series. Since S1 Dean has shown how badly he wants Sam with him, and fears him leaving. In the Pilot episode Dean says he needs Sam to help him find Dad, and Sam tells him he can do it on his own, and Dean tells him he doesnt want to. We were never given any insite into why they didnt speak for 2 years so, Im just going to leave that out as it seems to be irrelevant to everything. 

I believe they began when they were kids, and Sam started wanting to be like a normal kid. We know from Just My Imagination that at 9 yrs old Sam was begging to come hunting with Dad and Dean, we also learned that he would also like to run away and be normal. At that age, he chose to go with Dad and Dean, instead of running away, but as he aged, it became clear that he didnt want the hunting life. 

I dont think this meant that Sam hated his Dad or Dean at all, he feared for them and himself, so he took himself away from the situation when he could. Having Thanksgiving at a friend’s house, hiding out in a cabin in Flag Staff, going to college, none of these are bad things that Sam did (well ok maybe running away and hiding in a cabin is debatable) but Dean took it personal as leaving him. 

Dean loves taking care of Sam. He’s said he never had to be told to, he would have done it anyway. Sam has always loved it too but when Dean took off to hunt with Dad and left Sam alone he chose something over Sam, and thus fed his insecurities. 

I think where Sam’s insecurities began, just using canon, was always when Dean put something ahead of Sam. He left Sam in a motel room so he could play video games, and Sam almost got killed. Dean left him at Plucky’s to troll for girls while Sam was being scared by the clowns, he left Sam to hunt with Dad, so who was protecting Sam then? Sam thought all these other things were more important than him, and if they were, then does Dean even still love him? (possible thoughts of an adolescent boy)

So we dont really see this insecurity in Sam much until S8 when Dean had Benny. When Sam met Benny, he was ready to kill him before he even knew he was a vampire. There was no way Sam knew he was a vampire when he went for his blade. He was ready to kill him for being some big dude that went on a hunt with Dean... a replacement.  We didnt even know Sam had any qualms with Dean’s friendship with Cas until Dean wanted to go with Cas on his quest but felt he needed to stay behind and help Sam. Sam told him to go, but when Sam was ready to die for thinking Dean cant do this job with him, cant trust him, and would rather be anywhere than help Sam see this through, he gave Dean (and us) an ear full of his pain. And we were all (Dean included) Wait!! Hold up Sam!! Just think for a moment ok? 

Dean assured Sam that nothing is more important than him, never has been, never will be... and Sam came down off the ledge. Sam got hit with the insecurities again in S9, after the trouble with Gadreel, and Sam worried about his place with Dean again. At the end of Sharp Teeth, Sam tells Dean things are broken and they cant be fixed just by saying theyre family, because all their crap comes down to them being family. So he gives Dean somewhat of an ultimatum. You want to work? Lets work... if you want to be brothers?..... well those are my terms” I didnt like that Sam didnt finish that statement, but Im pretty sure, judging from the next several episodes, that the statement would have been “If you want to be brothers.... then we cant work together” and then we see that they took the root of working instead of brothering, and now Sam sees himself as just a hunting parter to Dean. Is it true? Of course not. But we see the whole pciture and Sam just sees what he sees.

The show has been chipping at Sam’s insecurities ever since. Sam feared Dean chosing Amara over him in S11, choosing Mom over him in S12 as family, Cas over him as friend in 13, and Ketch over him as hunting buddy later in 13, and now his life over Sam in just this past episode. He even saw Dean kill himself to save a kid they dont know who was already dead in S13, so I understand why Sam might be confused about his place and importance in Deans life ya know?

Im sure about Sam’s place in Dean’s world. Sam IS his world. Ive seen Deans reactions every time Sam died or Dean thought he was dead... but wanna hear something sad but true? Sam never did. Sam never saw how freaked out Dean gets. How suicidal and broken he is when Sam is gone. Dean doesnt tell him. Sam knows Dean sold his soul for him, but Sam doesnt know Dean sat for like 2 or 3 days crying and talking to his corpse. Maybe if he knew, he wouldnt worry so much right?

I dont want the show to put Sam back in a place where he would voluntarily leave Dean again, but I hope they reassure Sam that he’s Dean’s who world. I think they’ve begun that, with Dean telling Sam why he wanted Sam to stay behind when he went with Ketch, and telling Sam later that he doesnt worry about what happens to himself, but he does care about what happens to his brother. And letting Sam know that he said “Yes” to Michael to save him. Maybe someday these boys will get their shit together and just enjoy getting saving the world and getting old together. 

#my meta #winsecurities

[kazekohitori]

This is the end of a four part fanfic I wrote for my friends and myself to help the healing process after losing our favorite character and the end of the show.

Please read the previous chapters in chronological order: CastielXStacie Chapters One and Two, CastielXAllanah Part One, CastielXStevie, CastielXAllanah Part Two, and CastielXChristina before continuing on. Thank you.

CastielXStacie Chapter Three

Stacie had woken in the most wonderful way that morning; wrapped in her Castiel’s embrace. She savored the moment, pretending to still be asleep she clung to him for nearly an hour longer. As she lay there she couldn’t help but notice that he seemed to be asleep, or in such a relaxed state that his heartbeat and rhythmic breathing sounded as if he was, though he wasn’t snoring. She wondered if she had snored. How embarrassed she would be if she had. Still, he had joined her of his own free will, engulfed her with his arms, and remained with her through the night. If he had been annoyed with her surely he wouldn’t have remained.

They spent the day talking about the world and it’s current predicament (although it was mostly Stacie doing the talking while Cas listened intently); Castiel’s time in the other world, or, more correctly, the memories he had been endowed with; and how he would choose to spend this new life.

He had decided to stay with Stacie and live with her in her small apartment for the time being. She was unemployed and living on property owned by her parents, She was also their caretaker, not that they were invalid, but she was the able body that could help around the house should there be a leak that needed fixing or a run to the grocery store. She was her parents helping hands. At the time that Castiel arrived though, they were away at a rental property they owned and would not be back for a week. She and Castiel had decided that when she did introduce him to her parents she would say he was her live-in boyfriend. It made sense as she only had the one bed, and Stacie knew her parents wouldn’t question it.

Stacie took Cas for a drive into town, showing off the rural neighborhood she lived in and the sleepy little town just down the main road. It was very much like the little towns he had visited on cases with the Winchesters. Indeed, Castiel could see himself making a home in this community with her. Perhaps once the pandemic had subsided he could get a job at the gas station, Stacie could get a job at the local post office, and they could meet for lunch every day. Maybe they could spend the rest of their days like that.

They bought some take out and sat on a bench near the local fishing spot to watch the sportsmen attempt to reel in the big one. Castiel talked about Dean’s love of the sport and how he might consider taking it up, which Stacie wholeheartedly encouraged.

“My dad loves fishing despite rarely catching anything. And my mom and I love eating fish!” She chuckled as she nibbled on a French fry.

Cas smiled, “I doubt I will have more luck than your father.”

“You never know,” she shrugged.

Cas fed the ducks and wading birds while they talked of things to come and Stacie ate. One of the things Stacie requested of Cas was for him to teach her Enochian and to tell her all that he knew of angels. She confessed that she had been obsessed with angel lore since his introduction to the Supernatural Universe. Admittedly she hadn’t watched the show from it’s debut date fifteen years ago but had been engrossed by it three years ago. And winged creatures, especially humanoid winged creatures, had always fascinated her. She made him promise to one day show her his wings.

At the end of the day, they returned to Stacie’s apartment where Stacie made dinner and they watched a movie together. Castiel had asked to join her in her meal of stir-fried vegetables and rice. While it surprised her she was happy to have him try her cooking and his contented smile warmed her heart.

“I thought you only tasted molecules,” she smirked, not sure of how true his reaction was.

“I do,” he said, taking another bite, “I’ve learned to discern different molecular structures as a way of tasting.” He leaned back, chewing his food, “And this particular makeup is delicious,” a broad smile erupted on his face.

Stacie’s smile mirrored his, “I’m glad you approve.”

They settled on the bed to watch Stacie’s normal evening line up of YouTube clips from Jimmy Kimmel’s, Jimmy Fallon’s, and Seth Meyers’ different shows. Cas had stretched out his arms inviting her into his warmth which she happily accepted. She snuggled into him, her head resting on his chest where she could hear his heart beat. This was heaven. This was all she ever wanted. Throughout this whole terrible year of endings and uncertainty of future, this moment was bliss. And she endeavored to hold it tight that she might never lose it.

That’s when her tablet and phone began a stream of notifications from the ‘Misha’s Angels’ chat group.

Stevie: YOU GUYS!

Stevie: OMG

Stevie: YOU GUYS!!!

Stevie: HES REAL

Stevie: IM LOOKING RIGHT AT HIM!

Stevie: HES HERE IN MY HOUSE!!

Stevie: HES REAL

Stevie: YOU GUYS!!!!

Stevie: AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

Allanah was the first to respond.

Allanah: What do you mean? Who?

Stevie: CASTIEL! HE’S HERE IN MY KITCHEN!

Allanah: How

Stevie: Idk but he is! We just kissed!

Stevie: I thought he was a dream but

Stevie: HE’S FUCKING REAL!!!

Allanah: I know he is. I’m looking at him right now.

Stevie: What?

Allanah: He is on my couch with Emma.

Allanah: How is he with you?

Stevie: There’s two of them?!

Christina chimed in.

Christina: Make that three

“It seems that the spell worked completely,” Stacie said as she read the messages.

“They have their versions?”

“Yep. Huh, Stevie made out with hers.”

Cas’ face flushed at the thought of making out with Stacie so soon into their relationship. Good thing she was preoccupied with the phone in her hand that she didn’t notice.

“Guess it’s time to come clean,” she said as she began to type.

Stacie: Oh good. I was beginning to wonder.

Stacie: Hi guys! How y’all doing?

Stevie: How is there fucking three of them?

Christina: How is he even here?

Allanah: @Stacie do you know something about this?

Stacie: I do.

Christina: WTF guys

Stacie: I cast a spell to create thoughtforms of your Castiel.

Stevie: ...wha

Stacie: Each of you have materialized your own version of the Castiel you have created in your head while watching Supernatural.

Allanah: Thoughtform?

Christina: Like a tulpa?

Stacie: Very much like a tulpa but without the need to focus on a symbol.

Stacie: Thoughtforms are more like imaginary friends. With the right circumstances they can become physical manifestations for others to see, not just their creators.

Stevie: So this isn’t Castiel?

Stacie: With some research and a bit of luck I came across a spell that supposedly brought those imaginary friends to life. And, well, here we are.

Stacie: @Stevie, no, not THE Castiel from the show. Not the canon version either.

Christina: WTF STACIE!

Stacie: He is whatever interpretation you have created in your own head. If he is sexually attracted to you in your head he will be so in this world. If he is a giant nerd, he will be a giant nerd. He will be drawn to you as you are his creator but thoughtforms can and do take on a life of their own. Some have been known to turn violent but I don’t think we have anything to worry about as long as no one dreamed of a homicidal Castiel.

Allanah: My Castiel wants to know how the spell works

Stacie: @Christina, what’s the matter?

Christina: What am I supposed to do with an angel!

Stacie: @Allanah, the spell I cast works by creating the thoughtform when the creator concentrates on Castiel and the word ‘believe’ is the trigger word like ‘abracadabra’

Stacie: @Christina, what ever you’ve always wanted to do with him?

There was a long pause where no one wrote anything. Stacie turned to Cas, “I think I screwed up.”

He sat up, taking the phone from her to read through the messages. After a moment he placed a hand on the small of her back, “I don’t think you did. What you did, you did out of love. Not just for me but for them.”

“You’d think I would have learned from the show. One may do things for the right reasons but they may not always be the right things.”

Cas gave her a small smile while rubbing her back, “Guess that makes you one of us.”

She offered him a sad smirk. The phone went off again.

Stevie: Well I love him. I’m keeping him. Thank you

Stacie showed Cas the message. “See? It’s not all bad,” he smiled, drawing her to him.

Allanah: This is a lot to take in. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Christina was the last to reply.

Christina: What the hell, I could use some help in my life.

Tears pooled in Stacie’s eyes. She was able to do something nice for her dearest of friends when they had all been miserable. She had succeeded in her quest and she had a love of her own as well. She wouldn’t have to be lonely anymore. None of them would. The show may have ended but their love for it would live on right next to them every day of their lives.

THE END

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