#laughing wakes me up okay

[inkskinned]

she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let

and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment

and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.

and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment

and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?

to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.

and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.

you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.

#this btw is not including toxic friendships this is legit just something ive experienced MANY times now #writeblr #you ever have a friend in one of those relationships where ur like #u don't HATE their partner explicitly #but ur like. what the fuck y'all #like the weird part of being an adult is that you can't be like . CERTAIN their relationship is toxic #and also if u move too fast or push too hard u can hurt someone who is already in a scary situation so you just are like #frozen there. laughing awkwardly. saying ''haha..... yeah..... couldn't be me....'' #and like u can't tell - is this banter or does he actually think like. he's better than her. #all you can do is be there for your friend and hope they wake up to it #or ... that it really IS good #and it's just odd to you #tbh btw id rather have my friends feel safe coming to me if they have a concern about my relationship #like yes it's not ur business but it also IS bc im making u hang out with them and also ur my friend #it's a weird thing to experience as an adult bc it is such a blurry line and when u spend time #around couples that aren't like ACTUALLY ur friends but instead ''extended friend circle'' ur like #.... i don't know y'all well enough and he just called you a cow. and ur okay with that . and i don't know how to respond. #so ur like :) okay. um. go to couple's counselling i think #but also you are NOT supposed to pass judgement so it's like.... this weird limbo of feeling like you SHOULD say something #but knowing you CANNOT #idk that there's a way to resolve it!!!!!!!! it's probably a different approach person to person #edited my tags bc tumblr's new system fucked em up #PS EDIT: btw i should have said: #the pronouns in this can work in any and every direction. every gender and every sexuality and every #type of relationship tbh. even non-romantic relationships where ur like ''what do u mean ur bff calls u stupid''

[pekodayz]

aggie stuff from the whatever. it’s all sokudo

#I just woke up i kept waking up and passing out right after #I just wanted to draw oso with boobs. #okay?.???? #anywho i had fun with these. they make me laugh #osomatsu #choromatsu #osomatsu san #peko’s collection

[urmomsfavelesbian]

babe are you okay you’ve been watching werq the world youtube videos for an hour

#babe are you okay you cried to Wake Me Up in the shower last night #no i’m not btw #at first i thought time machine outsold but like listen i don’t knowwwww they’re both so good i like that the girls had more freedom last #year but also it’s so cool watching different girls do the same parts and also i actually watched the matrix which made is so much cooler #basically i miss daya #but also naomi’s number hasn’t left my head since the first time and rosé’s number actually makes me genuinely laugh?? not like. canned #drag race laughing but a Real Amusement laugh but mostly i just really miss daya #wake me up slaps harder than time machine (song) i think IMSORRY #but actually that might not be true #anyway i wanna go see wtw again #i feel like those girls that go to like 5 different eras tour dates #why is no one talking about Agent Betty

[microwave-core]

I wish that music players on blogs still worked. If they did, I would put this on loop.

#sonic #sonic adventure 2 #every knuckles stage has a rap btw... if you even care #also this is the stupid version where there's supposed to be a conversation between sonic and knuckles during the song #but both parts are played by the singer/rapper and he does the same voice for both #this part of the song fucking killed me one night and i literally couldn't stop laughing #which sounded weird because i have a weezy kind of laugh and no sound was coming out #and then i completely broke into the same laughing the next day when i told my friends about it #its so fucking bad but amazing love her so much #it might be stockholm syndrome but that isn't important #i didnt know you could put gifs in song cards but you can apparently #i havent played many sonic games but this is the only one with the chao garden so its the best one sorry liberals sun glasses emoji #listen i was trying to find a downloadable overthere shrine file from spm but couldn't find one #its an incredibly angelic and soothing piece and it only plays in a very remote area in the game and only after taking care of the story ev #nts #you should go listen to that to pretty pls okay i love you goodnight heres to pray i dont wake up in pain tomorrow

[spring-lxcked]

i hope everyone knows i have a very particular goal in writing william initially having good, loving interactions with every michael i write with and that's that i'm absolutely trying to make when we inevitably write Horrible Terrible Angst 10000x worse

#—— ✧ ooc » #.tbd. #it's sad in general but y'know what's sadder is if their relationship was Mostly Okay in the earlier years #if they had good moments. some good memories despite it all. #like yeah your corpse rabbit father is a serial killer and deserves death (and worse) #but also he used to read you books before bed and cut the crust off your sandwiches #yeah he's your undead son trying to burn you to death and you still blame him for your other son's death #but he's the only child you truly have left and you used to take care of him when he was sick & loved making him laugh #me waking up at 3 in the morning by accident like i HAVE to be sad abt this before going back to bed #personally strangling william w/ my bare hands first tho

[futureghost97]

the fact that I now have a voice recording on my phone of me breaking down crying while trying to sing The Best Day… horrendous

#you can literally hear me laughing at how dumb I sound while I’m sniffling my way through the bridge and final verse lol please end me #okay so FIRST OF ALL it is a difficult song to sing without sounding like you are in middle school and straining at your lung capacity #SECOND OF ALL when you are 25 and depressed and trying VERY HARD to have a good relationship with your mother #WHILE YOU ARE BOTH THE EMOTIONAL PUNCHING BAGS OF THE MEN OF THE FAMILY #and then suddenly the end of the song brings in your father and brother and you have to say nice things about them… #difficult! #ANYWHORE I did another recording and I sounded fine and it is now sitting in my mother’s inbox for when she wakes up for work 💅🏻 #because she picked this song (and Never Grow Up) as her two favorites and she said a while ago that she misses me singing in the shower #now I go back to flouncing on my bed and dungeon crawling because! fun fact! #I have not had voice lessons in almost ten years and my voice is a little shot from smoking and also Being Loud At Work #so even though I did some warm ups! holy fuck doing an hour straight of recording NGU and TBD until I was pleased with the results… yowch #how the FUCK was I a chorus kid every day for like 8 years #my stuff

[harryforvogue]

i love the way the sky looks when it's snowing. because it's not dark at all. it's a solid medium grey color, but that mixed with the street lights and house lights makes it look like it's kind of lit up as if it's the few minutes before sunrise and you're expecting to see the sun peek out soon.

#i just love it so much #this is also something faye would say and harry would just blink at her #except she'd say it like #'when it snows i feel like the sun is always about to come out' or something dumb #she's like half asleep and she's like 'the sky is so happy because of all our lights' or something nonsensical #and harry just cuddles her really tight and murmurs 'mhmmm sooooo happy' #and inwardly is like 'what the hell is wrong with this chick' #'too bad she's cute' #WHO IS GONNA HUG ME AND CALL ME CUTE FOR BEING SLEEPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOBODY #i dont want anyone except yasmine's harry anyways. #if YASMINE ever said something stupid like this after just waking up #that mf would not be like 'aw baby you're so cute' #he'd fucking double over and laugh #nearly piss himself laughing actually #and then later apologize when yasmine smacks him so hard in the face with her pillow that he sees stars #even mia's harry would be nice about it and kiss mia's head #and say 'shhh it's too late to be thinking so hard its okay baby' #if aaliyah said it #i think harry would blankly stare at her as she continues to go on and on about the street lights and the candles and the lanterns #and eventually just kiss her to make her quiet #and when aaliyah giggles against his mouth 'i am so smart' #harry just kisses her harder to avoid answering #he's very much a man of few words and more disbelief stares

[thebleedingeffect]

.

#its been rough these last couple days. all this stuff with dream strangely just makes me miss techno alot #plus the techno tribute during minecraft live. people talking about his passing during phils stream. i just keep being reminded #and its hard. its really fucking hard because any time i think too hard about it im just reminded that hes gone and i miss him so much #i just want him back. i just wanna listen to his laugh and voice and his little jokes that always me laugh and made me happy #i want to see him go live so he can be his charming. awkward self as he hangs out with his friends #i wish he was on stage and not fucking dream cause i miss and love him so much and it hurts alot and i donf knkw what to do #i know i have no option but to keep going. but god i miss him so nuch. i reallt wanted to meet him one day #and give him a hug if he was comfortable with it. i just wanted to exist with him for a little while longer. just for a bit #sometimes i still wish that ill go to sleeo one day and ill wake up and everything will be normal and he'll be back and everything is okay #its just that the grief has been aggressive lately. i love him and i never want to forget him. it just hurts alot sometimes #at least i have my techno plushies. i hope he knows that hes loved. and maybe just smile wherever he is #i love you techno. maybe in another life it'll be kinder and ill be able to tell you that

[flutterby5]

.

#some days are so hard like I am very not okay a lot of the time these days but rn I’m actually okayish so I can’t put it into words #but like basically I’ve been have trouble sleeping recently and it’s only gotten worse…to the point where I’ve been waking up every single #night and it’s so hard to get my brain to be sleepy again and go back to sleep #and it’s ruining my life like being exhausted makes life sososo hard I’m miserable and everyone around me is laughing and lighthearted and #I just wallow in my own misery…like when I’m okay I’m okay but when I’m not I question everything #I should really just quit my job and focus on dealing with this chronic insomnia I have now but I’ve been trying different things and #nothing has stuck..part of me probably isn’t trying hard enough but how can I with a full time #job and the need to feed myself and chores and getting my mind of everything and trying to workout more like?? #that’s why I need to quit but I am hesistant to move home like I don’t have to but still then I wouldn’t need to pay for rent yknow but I #I also kind of don’t want to move home bc it’s quite nice not to and for covid reasons bc I’m like the only one I know that still cares #about covid lmaooo but like there are definitely pros too like I’m glad I still have the option tbh #but I wish I could just sleep and didn’t have to fight my own brain every single night why can’t I just be normal like I know no one is #normal but also why does everyone else do such a good job hiding it while I just feel like I’m just bringing the mood down by struggling so #much..like also my dept so small rn and I actually do lie my coworkers they really already take a lot of weight comparatively and are #reliable that I feel bad idkkkk why can’t I just sleep like seriously. wtaf is wrong with me #random thoughts don’t mind me #I’m so fucking tired

[silverselfshippingchaos]

is it nap time? i think it's nap time. is it m.axi time? i think it's m.axi time.

#okay to be fair it's always m.axi time with me- #but anyways i like to think that his body is a lot warmer after the whole.. you know.. shard of soul edge in his body incident #so he's just a huge heater! it's kinda horrible in the hotter months but it's great for most nights ajskahs so many sleepy cuddles!! #naps with the bf truly do hit so different #oh and sometimes ash likes to touch her cold ass feet to his leg #'hey! what the hell?!' #so he tickles her to get back at her- #'mercy! mercy! i'm sorry!' #but they're both laughing so much and having so much fun like the idiots in love that they are #eventually they settle back into some nice cuddles and m.axi sleepily kisses his gf's neck.. yeah 😳 #'it's so nice to be with you again.' #oh also. bedhead. he's always so particular about his hair (cute..) so it's adorable when it's all messy like that #oh and his voice when he wakes up and- #ah hell i love him #ash rambles 💚 #he may be a dumbass personal heater of a man but he's MY dumbass personal heater of a man ‼️‼️ #one day i'll actually make content instead of gush posts #but not today LMAAOO 💀💀💀 #anyways yeah <3 i just think hes neat

[shinkei-shinto]

vent tags below I do not suggest that you read them

#shin talks #shin vents #i woke up. early. always early on my day off #i slept in exactly one time this year so far #and i get . on tumblr. on twitter. to wake up. on my day off #i only give myself one day off a week it's not particularly good for me #and i figure . i will wake up with some fun posts and some stupid stuff and some cats and some laughs #and i. cant. i cant do it! #I can't do this thing where I wander into these spaces that are supposed to be curated to be fun - #and i do A LOT OF EFFORT A FUCKING LOT OF EFFORT OKAY to make that happen - #I have OVER FIVE HUNDRED WORDS blocked on twitter so don't you fucking tell me that this is my fault a'ight #and now. im sitting here. because I can't read anymore tumblr! #because every fucking other post I see is c*nt this c*nt that #and guess what?? guess wHAT??? #of the THREE acceptable words for ''vagina'' #THAT was the one I USED TO USE in kink spaces!! haha!!! funny!!! #funny internet joke!!! ruining that fucking word for a MEME #a partner at some point is going to try to use that word on me in a scene and it is going to INSTANTLY knock me out of the scene entirely #and I'm going to go flat and unemotional and not be able to participate in scene and it's going to RUIN SEX for me for WEEKS #all because the internet thinks that it's hee hee haa haa funny #to take one of the THREE FUCKING WORDS that don't sound like fucking ''meat thermometer'' #and RUIN it. just fucking. #and WORSE?! WORSE??? #now one of my partners is EXPLICITLY and EXCLUSIVELY suddenly using words and descriptions of sex acts #that they ONLY EVEN KNOW ABOUT BECAUSE OF MY BODY #to ''hee hee haa haa oh no im in trouble in a video game'' #just fucking SCREAMING about my fucking genitals #about specific sex acts that have been performed by them on me #as if that's a fucking funny as if that should EVER be said in this manner for this situation #and now I can't even scroll on the websites where I have spent literal years

[marielschism]

good morning i am 20 years old omg that is sick.

#okay i have to admit it #being alive is fun bc i get to wake up and theres so many things to laugh at #like it's guaranteed that ill find something and itll make me laugh and thats such a good feeling idk

[heavenlydreamangelflyhigh]

think ive said it here before but it's so sweet how whenever i feel really bad/start crying my gf will put me to bed..like, she would physically carry me..n lay down with me and hold me. not even ask questions, just wait for me to speak when i can..within the first week of me being in her home she had said "i need you to tell me when you feel bad so i can put you to bed." n like. as silly as it sounds. it helps.

#the gesture helps absolutely alongside the action of listening and holding me..but im a bit like a fucked up baby #when i get distressed i probably need to sleep or to eat. naps always help. #and she knows i feel safe enough to sleep near her so she'll let me do so. #when i would nap on the couch she'd wake me for dinner with a hug and a kiss on the forehead along w a 'hi' #just..ghh. i miss her ao much. #shes so gentle with me and my heart #me crying makes her uncomfortable and sad but she. lets me do it. and reassures me that its okay n that shes here for me #when we'd cry together n hold each other before i left we would stop eventually n laugh together n watch a movie..make popcorn #im going to cry Again. #today has been so rough on me n her as well but she took time to check in on me and say she loves me.. #we talked abt chess. i dint know anything but i learn thru her and its great to see her so passionate #so cute. or when she progresses w whatever shes coding n she shares w me how she went about it .. oh . <3

[kairakeiji]

i wrote something…

#why is it that i always go off hiatus with an akaashi post #i’ll post it when i wake up tomorrow #or maybe tonight if i find the time #it’s literally me being semi h word for keiji BAHAHAH #and also a semi self insert considering how alcohol enabled it is #laughs awkwardly #you guys will like it dw #literally wrote it tho on my phone with my family in the room but it’s okay #calista.exe

[castielsprostate]

. Do You ever, feel, like? You're just not worth it? Like everything you do doesn't matter? Because it doesn't. Nothing matters. Nothing is of importance. And having one of those days where you know that's true and you try and put something out there only for it to not go anywhere, for it to not be seen, for your feelings of inadequacy and insecurity only to grow and fester in the back of your mind, fucking sucks

#and i know i need to put my phone down and step away and close my eyes and go to sleep but my thoughts keep running wild #and I can't help but scream inside my mind at the wall i built the structure in place that keeps me going in circles again and again #and im nauseous and sick and i feel alone when everyone around me looks so okay and laughs and smiles at the small jokes i make when #on the inside im crying and scratching and itching at the insatiable need to destroy myself #and i know i self sabotage and i know im not the right one for me i poisoned myself with my own #toxicity that i believed i needed to survive #and im tired. im so tired. what's the point when I might not wake up tomorrow. when my heart will stop and nothing ive ever #achieved will matter. nothing ive ever done will be remembered. thrown into the meaningless void of obscurity is my life and #my art and my time. everything ive ever loved is in that pit with me and the rope is getting thinner and im running out of #breath and i think i see the light at the end and ill tell myself ill be okay when really it wont matter at the end of the day #let me breathe #please #i beg

[jovalencia]

just watched a video of two girls having fun being happy and carefree and now i wanna kms

#joking and hyperbolizing. obvs. however. #okay they were like hungover driving their car telling the story of the night before and laughing and talking over each other #and smiling and GOD #idk if you could tell this about me but going out and getting blackout drunk and swimming in a club pool fully clothed and wingmanning #your friend while she flirts with a famous vine star to get back to your hotel room in a way you can’t remember #then waking up half drunk past noon and going to tgi fridays isn’t exactly my type of life #But god sometimes I wish I was those two best friends seemed so happy #anyways #carmen.txt