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#me going to my friends like so someone cursed my penis. and theyre like happens all the time youll be fine
thoodleoo · 2 years
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there are many words i'd use to describe an ancient penis curse but anticlimactic is, uh. not one of them
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tsukidotcom · 4 years
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Haikyuu HC to COVID-19 (Karasuno edition)
This is horrible 💀 im just so bored so I made whatever this mess is KFJSJDMSK enjoy
Hinata Shouyou
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huh? isn’t it just the flu?
“No, hinata. People have died from it-“
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH-
goes bananas
whenever someone sneezes or coughs, his soul leaves his body as he runs away to sanitize/wash his hands for a miserably long time.
eats an expired can of peaches thinking it’s his last resort
lowkey happy school is closed because homework sucks
but also highkey hates it because now all volleyball tournaments are closed
then gets all angry when he realizes he’d have to do online school???!!?? like wtf he got jipped.
thinks they could still do volleyball if they did online calls cus if the school can do it,, then vOLLEYBALL CAN
will probably miss half of the class calls from oversleeping/forgetting anyway.
sheepishly ask yamaguchi, yachi or tsukishima for help on assignments/notes. (he will NEVA ask kageyama. he’s always in competition with him here!)
still practices volleyball 24/7 in his backyard or room (maybe even with his baby sister??)
He’s really good at practicing all by himself from practicing all alone in middle school—
but will probably go crazy being alone all the time with his family. he just wants to play volleyball with the team again.
looks up “what to do when you’re bored” or “what to do at home while in quarantine” on youtube
Kageyama Tobio
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probably says he’s immune to the corona because he’s just better than everyone else
doesn’t really think it’s real until school shut down because of it
When he sees that corona is airborne he wont know what that means so he’d probably think it’s produced by air itself?? which makes him think air is trying to kill the human race?? and will be so confused as to why it decided to pop up now???
DESPISES online school. He had enough trouble understanding it from the gecko, so now he has to learn it basically all by hiMSELF?!?
And no way is he just gona email the teacher for help. If he does it’s gonna be only once in his lifetime. Anymore than that he thinks he’s doin too much. He doesn’t want his teachers thinking he’s dumb 😭
he says literally nothing during the calls he just tries to pay attention? and fails because he��s on a computer. in his room. alone. he’s bound to daze off or stare at a pen for 5 minutes.
Obvi still practices volleyball. Very much misses it. At least Hinata had his sibling to practice with him. tobio is a lone wolf in his household.
When his mom goes out to get groceries he gives her one of those doctor masks so she doesn’t catch corona.
Few moments later through the internet he realizes that corona is smaller than air molecules so if you can breathe through something you could still get it so he struggles for an hour thinking he just killed his mother
When his mom is back he keeps his distance in case she’s carrying the plague
omg did she just cough or am i imagining things no she definitely coughed she has corona oh oh god
In reality she was just clearing her throat.
is lowkey worrying about everyone and how they are 🥺 (yes, maybe even hinata).
thinks he’s science smart by calling it covid-19 than corona.
Asahi Azumane
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He just worries about everyones health
like he just imagines the worst case scenario’s and starts to get really worried if people got it. Always checks on everyone and asks if they’re feeling any symptoms of corona ❤️
He’s either not gonna get it or he gets it and dies there’s no inbetween
but he’s jesus himself so theres no way he nor anyone in his bloodline can get it
is very happy to know that dogs can’t get it.
Takes online school seriously and tries his best
And is honestly so sad school just ended??? even if it’s temporary, he could be learning, playing volleyball, and going about his day instead of staying in a cage. he’s a third year so—how would graduation even go..?
always is up to date on the news !! and notifies everyone if anything important is added/changed.
Always tells everyone to stay safe! Whether through text or before ending a call.
only buys a lot of toilet paper from the fear of there being no toilet paper in stock since evERYONE IS BUYING IT-
Starts to try new hobbies that he put off for the longest time cus quarentine is rlly getting to him.
Is all out a family guy so he doesn’t mind the extra time with his family.
Nishinoya Yu
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OAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOA
420 blazin’
thinks going outside means you’re instantly gonna die from corona attacking your white blood cells (????)
but also probably doesnt care as he goes outside like everyday to run around and get rid of energy (and to practice volleyball, of course).
also why is it called white blood cells when blood is red ☠️ smh
Buys 101611018320129 bags of chips because that’s his comfort food
yay more gaming time!!!
Noya🐒: Tanaka do u wana play minecraft 2getr latr?
Tanaka🍌: HELL YEAH!!
doesn’t shower for three days straight because screw personal hygiene!! No more school!!! Can do whatever he wanted!! It’s basically summer!!!
until he’s forced to do online school.
Is def the class clown. Probably somehow kicks the teacher out of the call through a little bit of hacking.
“alright guys so i’ll be you’re substitute teacher for the day-“
tbh acts the same as he would in school. maybe a little more rebellious because, i mean, what is the teacher gonna do? send him to DETENTION? call his mOMMY?
Calls/spams literally everyone in his contacts because he’s so bored and lonely. Answer him!! Y’all will be on facetime for hours!!
He’s fun to facetime.
Will call you a loser if you don’t have an apple iPhone because then he can’t facetime you and facetiming is one of his favorite things to do to pass time (besides gaming)
HE A TRUE GAMER
Okay but he lowkey still tries at school for the sake of his grades and his future ;-; maybe calls asahi or sugawara for help??
always looks up his homework on the internet to see if he can get an answer key or something (he did that anyway even before corona but)
will do one subject for 3 hours thinking he’s finally done with everythinf till he realizes he has like 4 other subjects and needs to do those too.
Sending memes all the time
Tsukishima Kei
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oh, what about corona again?
honestly could give NO fucks??. like ABSOLUTELY ZERO. nonxistent.
doesn’t even remember it’s still happening half the time.
is surprisingly very knowledgeable about corona.
he’s just smart and sciency¿ so he understands the ins and outs of corona like how it works and how its spread.
so if you tRULY want any update or background info on the corona virius, ask Tsukishima.
bitch don’t touch me you have rabies.
doesn’t care that he’s obligated to stay at home because he would have stayed either way. he very much likes being alone.
might go a little crazy cooped up in his room so he’ll hang with his brother/family or go outside before he says ‘okay that’s enough’ and goes back to his room.
isolation? oh okay *puts on headphones*
he rlly gonna be rocking it out in his room cus he can listen to music all day any day
developes a really bad sleep schedule since he had no way to get rid of the energy he got rid of at school.
still a huge tease so he says everyone has the corona virius.
is never online on social media which means he’s never up to date with his frIENDS. Doesn’t have a clue what those dipshits are doing and could care less (besides yamaguchi,, they probably facetime or call thru skype or something).
I bet the whole volleyball squad has a groupchat and honestly he puts all notifs on mute cus his phone keep goin DING DING DING DI DING ID DID IDKNG DING DIG
Brother: Omg why are you getting so many text messages?
Tsukki: Shut up
if he is online on the gc and he texts it would be simple replies like “Hi” “Okay.” “No.” “Goodbye.” and then he’s gone for another week
every first year is begging on their knees for tsukishima to give the answers or help them out and he obviously says: go do the hw yourselves idiots
besides yamaguchi!!!! again!! cus theyre gay for each other
maybe practices once in awhile with his brother or alone in his backyard but he doesn’t care
Tanaka Ryuunosuke
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buys 101817 pounds of toilet paper because everyone else is? but not because of the same reason as asahi. he thinks toilet paper is the cure to corona.
GO STUPID AAAAAAAAA GO CRAZY AAAAAAAAAAA-
probably has a part time job at a grocery store so he still has to go to work 😭 i dont even know how he could have a job in the first place he’s probably always late-
still gamin with noya of course
GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM IM PLAYING MINECRAFTT
also buys like all the junk food thats in stock. and since he works at the grocery store he gets a ton of coupons and deals.
texts Kiyoko everyday goodmorning ❤️❤️❤️ and goodnight 😘😘 texts just to be left on read.
“i love it when she ignores me !!!”
scrolls through tiktoks for 1000 hours to pass time
School Is For Losers!!
similar to noya, he thought it was basicaly summer until he realized they were gonna be doing online school. literally had a fit and said he didnt wanna do jack squAt
Laughs so hard when nishinoya somehow kicks the teacher out of the call he’s like laughing so loud and hard he starts crying
all of the sudden has a better view on school
gets excited when he sees nishinoya on the call
makes funny and ugly ass faces when the teacher isn’t looking. everyone laughs and the teacher’s like 🤨
probably uses the green screen effect so he can change hus background (somehow) and accidentally misclicks a file so a girl wit a bikini becomes his background for .5 seconds before changing it to a cursed meme:
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doesn’t get half the shit the teacher is talking about
but it’s okay because the half he doesn’t get is the other half noya gets
and the half noya doesnt get is the orher half tanaka gets
they’re two peas in a pod 🥰
until they try explaining it to each other and suddenly get confused?? mental malfunction ¿?
yeah im SMART!!!
s -
m -
a -
r - penis
t -
Daichi Sawamura
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quite calm about the whole coronavirus
like he knows it is serious and understands how it is spread but he’s still calm about it??
tells everyone to sanitize and wash hands on a regular. and social distancing!!
honestly still wakes up like he does on normal school days and does all his academics just fine.
he even does gym activities (besides volleyball) for 30 minutes to an hour!!!! he be running on that treadmil! getting stronk!
does each subject on his own for 20-40 min each day. he’s really good at self discipline
makes sure sugawara and asahi are up to date on school work and will gladly help.
sadly can’t help the first years (and probably second years) because that info is deep in his brain and basically forgot how to do it after a year or two of not using it.
VERY VERY VERY sad that volleyball nationals are cut off. this is his last year and for it to be??? gone??? just because of some flu?!?! hates it.
he wishes school to go back and still has hope that school will go back to normal in a couple of weeks (even though it’s a slim chance).
asks the teacher questions whenever he has questions. He’s also vv considerate so he’ll ask questions he knows the answer to but asks them for anyone who’s confused ab it/wants to ask but is too shy. (literally i lov daichi sm)
Eats a healthy amount of everything
asks asahi for any updates on corona even though he’s quite up to date himself. he just wanna make sure he didn’t miss anything.
also doesn’t mind being around his family. he’ll do more chores around the house to help his parents out :> he’s literally perfect wtf
def does worry about everyone in the volleyball gc and anyone else he has contact with. Will also email classmates and ask if they’re doing all right. Even away from volleyball he’s a team player ☺️✌️
Is happy for the rest of the day when asahi tells him dogs can’t get corona.
Yamaguchi Tadashi
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oaoaiquqhdkoaiaagadjsiwi?
doesn’t know what to believe anymore
keeps in touch with everyone!! always online 24/7 on social media, vball gc, you name it.
Literally everyone is acting so normal why are people so calm am i the only one worrying about this and the worlds future like this year has been really bad so far for not just me but the whole nation actually the entire world honestly like war almost broke out in january and now this corona stuff is really buttering my crissont the wrong way-
Even though tsukishima literally gives No Fucks, yamaguchi is the complete opposite.
like tsukki and yamaguchi call on skype and eVERY TIME yamaguchi starts with ‘how have you been? do you feel sick at all? have you drank enough water today?’ and so on
“What are you even worrying about?”
“Well...what if you get the corona virius?... it can be deadly, you know!! Thousands of people have died from it!!! The fact school is shutting down and people are panicking is making me feel like i should be panicking-“
Tsukki will then snarkily reassure him it’s fine and people their age are the least likely to get it bad.
Yamaguchi will feel a little better afterwords
“Thank you, Tsukki!”
Tsukki will ‘tch’ it off
Even though he gets really good grades he has triuble finding motivation to do any school work?? doing school work in his own home? 😐
His home was kinda a place he can chill whereas school is a place he can be fully focused
but now his home is ALSO school??!!?
Luckily he understands the work, at least.
When he sees tsukishima on the call, too, he instantly says hello.
“Tsukki!! Hey!! 😁”
“Shut up.”
“Gomen, Tsukki.”
Yeah. Even when they aren’t at school, he’s still the same as always.
He takes extra care of his family and always stays in touch with other relatives. Especially grandpa and grandma. THE SECOND he learned elderly people are at more risk you bet your ass he’s calling them making sure they’re okay. He checks up on them everyday now.
He peobably practices volleyball a little, too. He’s more focused on schoolwork though.
Sugawara Koushi
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Have you guys ate dinner yet? 🥺
obviously checking up on everyone
he would fail as a mother if he didn’t.
Actually reads in his free time?? He finally has time on his hands to read these books so.... here we are!
Wakes up at a scheduled time everyday (minus weekends. Maybe sleeps for an extra hour or so).
He dresses in pjs rather than actual clothes because he’s not going anywhere with this social distancing thing.
Always tries to lighten the mood when all the students are on the online call. Maybe crack some joke or innocently play around with the effects.
He still pays close attention in class and does quite well on his own. No help from his parents! He can do everything on his own! He a big boi!
Does homework really well, too. Probably does extra work or more work than needed just because it makes him feel good afterwords.
Honestly i can see him cooking in his free time. If he doesnt feel like reading or scrolling mindlessly through his phone, he gonna cook.
Will make the best cookies in the universe.
HAS A HECK OF A SWEET TOOTH. NOT A DAY GOES BY WITHOUT HIM GETTING HIS PRETTY HANDS ON SUM TREAT
Honestly isn’t too good with exercise so he might gain a few pounds or grow the smallest chub 🥺🥺🥺 he would be so cute omfg.
is realy involved with his family!! they play a board/card game every friday night and have the best time.
if he has a dog, cat, or literally any animal you know he’s gona be hanging with them since he has more time.
Still! Playing! Volleyball! I mean by now every boy is practicing at least a little bit. He would probably be in his backyard playing volleyball with his family. Theyy’d set up a net and everythin! They’re all rookies at it but he still cherishes the moments with them.
It’s honestly still practice. Better than nothing
He talks about how his family plays volleyball and everyone is so jealous like 😭😭 makes him more grateful hearing half the volleyball team saying they have to practice alone.
Watching youtube videos of random videos/vines making him giggling.
“Hey, Dachi, look at this video.”
IS A SWEETHEART STFU !!!
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