#nice to have a whatever the fuck im having while “jingle bells” plays

[miallurk]

In these days i realized i like art and writing and creating and shopping and taking walks and talking to people and cleaning and helping and studying and doing things but i'm just. too stressed, tired and burned out to do them. How great!

#i am losing my sanity day by day #drowning myself in the nearby lake seems better and better every day #why am i even writing this i have literally no mutuals or even people who'd care about #don't mind me crying myself to sleep haha #ooooh look at this pathetic baby. sitting in their little bed crying stupid tears. i should at least get tissues now while my crying isn't #fuck history fuck school and fuck me i quess #am i gonna start treating this as an actual blog and make a sideblog for reblogs? who knows! certainly not me; stay tuned for the story! #i'm gonna go and just let it all out into a pillow #vent ig #my mom is blasting holiday music in the other room lol #nice to have a whatever the fuck im having while “jingle bells” plays #at least i'm not hearing mariah carey ig #anyway i've probably hadn't been taking care of myself lately it has been worse despite me promoting it to everyone who needs #when i vented last time and it wasn't taken seriously so woop #anyway imma go try to calm myself and back to my notes i go #please gods what did i do to deserve thi s shit. fuck you #i hate it here i really do. i hate when these people talk to me i hate them. i at least can be sorta accquaitances with one but they just. #all stare and laugh? i actually can't. like i'm some fucking clown and laughing stock. just kill me at this point. i have been enduring this #for YEARS and suddenly i'm being a little bitch about it?? what the fuck. why am i so mushy all of a sudden. being shown an ounce of respect #and care made me expect it more? fuck #i'm just setting myself up for failure. i am just a giant loser and failure of a person. #everything seems so fucking hard. and pointless. i am tearing my rotten little heart apart with this. i am once again grieving things #long ago and things i never had. my everything has to be pleasing to an outsider #my value is my suffering. am i breaking enough? is this beautiful to look at #at my self destruction? i hate myself. i treat others so cruelly. i am a horrible fucking person. #my problems are not their burden - i forced it on them. wept like a baby because she left me. and what happened in the end? my paranoia got #to me. i left them. i fucking. i fid the thing i was afraid of being done to me. #this is showing so many issues. #so many things wrong with me. i shouldn't even be alive by this point - i wasn't supposed to survive past 12 #i am being forced to do this every day. someone please just end my fu king suffering

[amphii-writes]

How Nekoma And I would Interact Head cannons

Hey! this is just how I think I would interact with the team because I know myself better than I know you, the reader! so i’m sorry if these are a bit boring :,)

warnings: swearing, mentions of violence(?)

If anything i’d meet kenma through school, he’d be a seatmate of mine and id ask him about videogames and we’d hit it off right away

I feel like we’d have midnight convos about videogame lore and we’d gush about our favorite games to each other and bond over nerdy shit like pokemon

With this, Kuroo would absolutely know about my existence, and god he’d tease kenma about having a “girlfriend” rip kenma

With this, kenma would be tired of kuroo’s bullshit and just ask me if i could go to a practice so he could get kuroo to finally stfu and of course id go because i wanna support a homie

Kuroo would be confused because 1. I am out of kenma’s league and 2. How the fuck did he “bag” me?

This would cause kuroo to be absolutely idiotic towards be and he’d ask me if i need a chem tutor, no i dont but ty for being so kind. This would spark a fucking dellemia in him, im cute, im nice, what the f  uc kckkk

With this, the other members would for sure notice their dumbass of a captain short-circuiting and me standing next to a cringing kenma and investigate

Lev gives me the Im-gonna-run-full-force-and-tackle-hug-you vibe so rip me :,)

Yaku and kenma would flip their shit and scream at lev because he just assulted me what the fuck dude

Man’d be like whoopsies i got excited :b

Inuoka would also be screaming cause it's inuoka, what else would he be doing, Fukunaga would be chillin, just staring at me like 0-0

Now this is where it gets good, yamamoto is late to practice by a little bit and he sees f e m a l e

MAN GOES APESHIT AND JUST “HOLY SHIT WE GET A HOT NEW MANAGER LIKE KARASUNO”

After training camp and everything i feel like the team would be comfortable enough with me to add me into their group chat

Kenma, yaku, and i would absolutely shit-talk everyone and have a mini groupchat where we send memes and talk about dumb shit together

I feel like the name would be like “Bruh moments” while the actual main group chat would be “Nekoma Nekonya” and that- that also pains me tbh

That group chat would be cursed as well, like any teenage group chat is but this one,,, for sure.

Kuroo would send cursed images and yaku would give him a therapists phone number and ask him if he wants to schedule an appointment after he sent a salad fingers meme

Inuoka def sends those like- fuckboy 🥶🥶🥶 cishet boy “I hate women but want pussy” memes and wears highlighter clothing i'm so sorry it hurts me too

I feel like as a reward i jokingly said i would wear a cat-girl maid outfit and these motherfuckers did a mini-fundraser for it and gOT ENOUGH FUCKING MONEY FOR IT

And the catcher is- that id wear it tO A FUCKING GAME AGAINST FUKURODANI

I would indeed cry out of embarrassment before the game but the team would for sure say i look cute as shit and they’d be right, a hoe can pull off some cat ears

I would cause half the team to short circuit

God,, i would walk around and the bells would jingle and im- god i hate that

One doesn’t simply just walk around during a fucking high-school volleyball game like that and not get attentioin

Bokuto would probably yell something about it too and that also brings me pain

Well because of this- nekoma won and asked if i could wear that to all their games

Finally got them to let me just wear the ears and tail so poggers

But here's the kicker, next match is against Nohebi

That means daisho and kuroo get to have their moment of absolute fucking beef 

So I walked in, wearing cat ears and a tail. Daisho is newly single, you get where this is going.

I can just imAGINE HIM BEING ABSOLUTELY DUMBFOUNDED LIKE HUH??? WHY WOMEN WEARING CAT EARS??

Id be with my team and they’d ask me to do the neko pose and i would because i wanna make them excited for the game

dAISHO WOULD WITNESS THIS AND JUST HAVE A MELTDOWN

With this newfound hate and love for nekoma, he has a new objective: fuck the nekoma manager in the cat ears and tail

After the game he’d walk up to me and flirt and id just be so tired like dude,,, im in cat ears and chugging a monster please give me fucking mercy

But of course, Kuroo finds me in time to see him kabedon me, his precious neko manager?? Aha n o .

Fighting ensues and i have to break it up, i give daisho my number so he gets the fuck away from kuroo, and kuroo gets to see me do a new neko pose or whatever

Crisis averted

Well until daisho texts me anyways

Then its “Kenma,,, you gotta help me”

Poor kenma he doesnt wanna deal with that snake bastard

Probably just brushes me off lmfao

After that yaku decided to have me stick by him when they play nohebi because and i quote “YoUR GONNA GET KIDNAPPED BY THE FUCKING SNAKE MAN” and i dont wanna worry yaku

Daisho also has make a rumor about fucking me to his team and they believe it-

Awkward matches after that

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #nekoma

[stimmypaw]

stimmypaw reads the apprentice’s quest, a blog post

A big one, just a bunch of thoughts as I’m reading it, of course, lots of spoilers for the first book in the Warrior Cats series A Vision of Shadows. This will be covering just the first book tho, it’s all in the Read More, let’s gooooooo!!!!

Vision Of Shadows time

Lots of new cats!!! I don't remember these guys as kits or anything wrow!!! I like their names but itll take a while to get used to them

Also cant believe they printed stormcloud's dead name

Omg there's a cat named beepaw

I love these cats all of them so much im going 2 cry

All new names are perfect

I FORGOT HOW GORGEOUS THE CAT VIEW IN THE RECENT BOOKS WAS, LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT

I'm glad leafpool smokes weed

I love reading from Jayfeather's point of view, his grumpiness hasn't grown on me ever but thats just me, I still enjoy it lots he's great and its fun

Firestar and Leopardstar's characterizations are On Point i love it

OOF i feel so bad when jayfeather is mean to others, poor kestrelflight, I love those two

Lovely Jayfeather moments now its time for the first chapter

I like this duo! Also I didn't think I'd ever say this but shut up squirrelflight one can have fun AND learn with their mentors

Sparkkit sounds nice she makes jingling bell noises when she walks around

Alderkit is chadphobic /j

I can see Alderkit taking deep breaths to relax its rotating in my mind its beautiful

God this first chapter feels so good and comfortable, like eating noodles and chicken nuggets. I am so so deeply in love with it, its gorgeous!

Sparkkit is so perfect too, and Graystripe remembering Firestar aaaaaa

DUSTPELT SAID WHAT? PHDHAHAHHA OH NOOOO I don't remember their relationship much, must have been fun, I love young little creature squirrelflight I MISSED HER SO BAD WOW

I started reading the second chapter and died, I think ill take a break now 2 sleep heehhee

I love them describing twoleg stuff its always so fun and alien, like watching an animal planet show about funny sea creatures.

Also I have determined sparkpaw is my favorite, might be my favorite cat ever next to hollyleaf??? I really identify with her and also she's autistic i have decided that

Alderpaw baby noooo hhhh their mentor at least is trying to show its okay, he seems very emotionally distant so far and alderheart feels very emotionally needy, actually both of them do, did I mention I love Sparkpaw??? I might be imprinting myself 2 much on her

I love how like, its clear both of them are absolutely anxious and worried about others opinions on them, which is clearly something they got from being Firestar's grandkids, deputy kids and leader kids. And bramblestar too, I recall him being quite the anxious lad ahhah. Sparkpaw will be showing confidence and being loud but the second anyone isn't approving of her or she does something "wrong" she gets small and quiet, and she ended up setting a high bar for herself by being good at hunting and fighting so I'm curious to see how that will go. Also there's nothing wrong with being guided through a crowded place to meet others Sparkpaw!!! I bet the two of them would be stuck without not knowing how to talk to others had Needlepaw not shown up. I love them, my gf is mocking me saying I'm a Sparkpaw kinnie.

Apprentices will like learn about a thing and tell everyone about it all the time and assume its always true in every situation and thats valid I love kids like that. Also in my head Needlepaw kinda looks like a porcupine. Oh boo she's fatphobic >:(

I love apprentices they are so fun and silly, just making fun of the leaders like its nothing. The way they are clearly learning and absorving everything their warriors say and do like sponges its just ***chefs kiss***

Omg shadowclan is just full of 12 year olds help

And then the old person said "it sure is hard being old!" And everyone clapped

Shout-out to pretty Riverclan apprentice #481977 I love her

Leafpool: 👁👁

Alderpaw: I knew it im cursed and awful and terrible and I will never amount to anything

I wish the cats didn't seem to be giving up on him so easily though

Ah yes the classic thunderclan move "you suck, into the medicine hole you go"

The way sparkpaw changes the things she says and how she does when it isn't the status quo around her oooooooooooooyeaaaaaaa I love 1 autistic cat

Alderpaw considering your problems lesser than other cats won't help you deal with them better bro

I love Needlepaw's excitement about Alderpaw being a medicine cat apprentice, and her sarcasm, she feels like a preppy teenager

Ahhh this is so good, I am so thirsty for family moments like this, just Alderpaw bonding with grandma, I’ll definitely want to draw this one it’s so sweet.

Oh to be young and silly.

I really am enjoying like, Alderpaw’s struggles to seeing how he fits in the clan, how he fits in himself, how he wants to be seen and what he wants to be, it’s really good. I Am Engaged(tm) With This Plot.

SPARKPAW NOOOOOOO but also Yes I want her to be shown vulnerable and weak please 

POP, god watching this stuff always awful, the cats must have thought he broke her ahahah

Also, really great that they learned from Dovewing and now like leave choices and discussions about prophecies between adults

And plus Brambles seemed to take the time to explain stuff to him, seems he wont be going alone either the 1 thing is that he will be the only one knowing what the journey is really about, why though??? I didnt read Firestar's Quest or whatever why does Skyclan need to be secret??? Seems quite silly really!

YESSSS SANDSTORM GET HIS ASS FIGHT FIGHT LOVE THIS LOVE SANDSTORM

I could feel squirrelflight nearing explosion here, this was very fun, i wish they werent hiding this though!!!

The secret thing is showing to be a plot point so I am once again Very Engaged

Also, wonderful dialogue bit, someone asked Bramblestar why an Elder is going and:

Lovely perfect perfect

I miss you dovewing

SQUIRRELFLIGHT LOVE YOU

Oh boy this is it

Traveling book moment

Graystripe: Soooo you're excited to go on the journey to the old territories and Skyclan?

Sandstorm: Yes! It's been ages and-

Graystripe: I'm sure the tribe will love the visit too

Sandstorm, groaning: Oh noooo I forgot about how the tribe is in the way of every journeyyyyy noooooo they're such a racist caricature, please tell me you have a plan

Graystripe: Yes don't worry about it the writers forgot about the tribe in my comic book so you can just use the excuses i did to actively avoid it

Sandstorm: Oh thank Starclan

Sparkpaw's desperation to prove herself oof, her anxiety with understanding the prophecy, oh boy, and Alderpaw feeling too overwhelmed by the questions and not managing to talk!!!! I am so glad they are both autistic

Hoping "Being Leader" wont mean theyre putting nonsense responsibility on the apprentice again

Ah good Sandstorm is on the lead again, as she should, she should have been leader she would have been great

I can't believe Alderpaw thinks I look stupid and diseased :( /j

Everything about this twoleg scene was scandalous I loved it, Sparkpaw just toppled over a trash bag and they are eating from it, iconic, also did those twolegs throw out a whole turkey? Damn

Its not that Sparkpaw is freakishly good at hunting she is very hungry and constantly on the watch for things to eat

BRO Ive never been in a road where the drivers are this wild, throwing bottles out of the car????? Ive seen Fruit being thrown like once or twice, what the fuck!!! I'm glad they are going to wait until the morning to continue

Okay I was not expecting Needlepaw to show up this girl is chaotic I love her

ACTUALLY YEAH WHY DIDNT THEY TELL THE OTHER CLANS ABOUT THIS SINCE THE PROPHECY IS ABOUT ALL THE CLANS???

Needlepaw is like Rono from Bambi 2 if he wasnt a mean bully and thats very epic

Very curious character though, how come her mentor isnt teaching her the warrior code properly? Is that an issue with all apprentices?? Is the clan overwhelmed by 12 year olds and they won?

Having lots of fun trying to play the game "what animal are they describing this time" the erins made here, im glad they're in a farm. Worried about Sandstorm though :c

Fuck im worried about sandstorm a lot, her wound hurt on Me

Yeah water is good youre right sandstorm

Aw man I hope she's okay let her at least survive to meet skyclan please

NOOOOOOOO SANDSTORMA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sandtteooonrjrbbbmmnnnnnnnnnn

I am so sad

Alderpaw denying it, Starclan shining upon their vigil, everything crushed me i cried

Alderpaw considers Nihilism

Haven't seen a cat thank starclan for prey in a while its

Oh look they time skipped a journey! They don't tend to do that thats nice

I'm so excited to be meeting The Skyclan that everyone in the fandom knows now

So far they seem kinda mean but thats most clans at first glance really

Okay somethings up

I uh have heard of Darktail pretty sure he's a bad guy so yeah something really bad happened to Skyclan

Am worried

Darktail sounds like an evil himbo* i may be enjoying him actually

*himbos are usually nice by default so he's just evil and stupid and strong

Does needletail know these cats already?????

Ah

Shit

Oh okay fuck

I've been quietly reading the rest because I am just concerned and I want them to be okay as quickly as possible

Waterfalls are a classic nice

Oh boy time for our unlikely duo of Alderpaw and Needlepaw to get out of a Mess!

I did not expect this to end up with the two of them journeying into parenthood, but I'm happy it did

Well actually I'm very unhappy theyre so lost and there's no sign of Skyclan I am very worried for everyone involved Sparkpaw must be feeling awful!

Twigkit is a great name

Yeah this ended terribly

Overall! Frigging loved it this book was GOOD and a great start for the series I am very excited to read the rest, SO WORRIED ABOUT SKYCLAN THO AAAA the characterizations were great the characters were great the pacing was fun and I didn't get bored once!

I think o only wish I had read this sooner really so I could look up others thoughts without getting heavily spoiled about the last books, I can watch a few videos already though thats a start ahhaha. But yeah it was great and it felt very good to read, haven't swallowed up a book so quickly in a very long time!!! Very happy I finally got my hands on this 💕💖💕💖💕💖 cant wait 2 start the next one

If you read all this, hope you had fun hahaha, ill be making more of these cus theyre fun and I like talking about warrior cats thats just my thing

Til next time

#wc #the apprentice's quest #warrior cats #a vision of shadows #avos #warrior cats avos #avos wc #wc avos #avos warrior cats #warrior cats a vision of shadows #alderpaw #needlepaw #sparkpaw #violetkit #twigkit

[huangfilms]

Florist!Renjun

summary: i need cash because it’s summer and my parents don’t give me allowance so i applied for this job and on the first day someone ran into me and now i have coffee all over me and wow you’re pretty cute but i gtg and when i first check in for my shift i see you there,,, with my boss,,, who’s your grandma-- oh im working with you

(A/N) ok kids i am back with another renjun bulleted fic!!!! because i have nothing else to do!!! I honestly don’t know how this is going to go but I hope u like whatever i made, feedback is appreciated! also i suck at summaries so let’s Just Pretend that i have a decent summary up there

i mean I Love Flowers ya know

renjun is a flower himself but u dont know that yet

so it’s summer break and you want to make that ca$h money because ur parents don’t give u allowance during the summer,, that Blows.

okay well you decide to apply for some job in places that interest you

like the cafe around the corner of your family’s apartment complex

or the photography studio, or the arts studio

maybe even the animal shelter because!!! animals!!!

but none of those really caught your attention

sure u liked smelling coffee at like,, 5 am, and u liked taking nice pictures and drawing, and you loved!!! animals!!!

but the thing you loved the most

u guessed it!! flowers!!!

so there was a really cute flower shop that was just across your home

and you applied ofc

step one: done

all u need to do is to w a i t 

but you’ve checked out the place, and its literally the cutest place ever!!! 

you Really Want The Job Now

so you get a cute little envelope in the mail saying that you could start full time in like 2 days!

u get super psyched because it’s your first job

so fast forward two days, and u wake up bright and early because you’re really excited!!! 

when you walk in, you see the cutest old lady just watering the plants 

the door jingles since there’s a bell, and she turns around and just looks at you for like,, 5 seconds

and then she gives you THE MOST PRECIOUS SMILE EVER

so she goes in to tell you what you should do today, and says that her grandson will be working with you for summer as well

and you’re like??? oh 

because you don’t

you’ve never interacted,,

with,,, boys.

you get SHY my dude but it’s all good because he arrives tomorrow from where ever he came from

SO anyway, you water the plants, tend to the customers, and all that jazz

you go home and you start to think about her grandson,, like

what does he look like? is he nice or what??? how old,,, is he???

so you think about ur job and then you have anxiety because wow new people who might be ur age

that doesn’t mix well with you

(unless you’re a social butterfly but a bitch can’t relate)

so you wake up and you’re feeling a little nervous to meet this kid

you leave the house really early because you’re just gonna walk around to the cafe before your shift started

but then on the way, you bump into this Pure Soul

and he spills coffee all over you

and it’s ho t like that boy?? facts

who drinks hot coffee in summer

ANYWAY you jump in shock and let out a yelp from how hot it is, and then you look up about to POP OFF but then u take a look at him

and he’s a mess, he looks so flustered, he’s r e d, and he’s stuttering out apologies

and then he dabs your t-shirt with the s i n g l e napkin that he has, wasn’t going to help but hey, A for Effort

and u gotta admit, it’s kinda cute

but anyway you say that it’s fine, it was an honest mistake, and it was kind of, both of your faults.

so he apologizes once more and then offers up his light jacket, but then u refuse because your apartment isn’t even that far away.

so you leave hastily before u could get the Cute Boy’s Name

and u literally run to change into like a sweater or something, and then Blast to the flower shop

and u see that boy again with the cute old lady 

and then u connect th e dots

it’s the grandson

oh god

and your heart??? speedy fast, like,,, sonic Wishes

so you say a greeting to his gma, and then u speed walk to check in and then start your shift

idk u felt lowkey embarrassed cause!! cute boy!! u ran!! now hes h ere!!

it isnt until the pot is overflowing to know that youre overthinking a lot, and there’s like,,, a huge puddle,, at your feet,,,

so you almost drop the stupid watering can and then fuck your life over because that boy??

across from u

in the next isle

looking at u

and he

He Smiles That Smile

I think he was trying not to laugh because he puts his hand over his mouth

i mean,,,,, u embarrassed urself once more

big OOF

but anyway you turn ur self to look away from him becaus e You Just Cant look at him

But life goes on,,,

Fast forward like idk, maybe 2 hours??? you get your first break of the day so u tell ur boss that you are just going to get a snack back at that cafe that u didn’t get to go into yet cause of That Boy 

she tells u to be careful and that you could take like 30 minutes to an hour since you were working so hard

i mean, you were just watering plants but ok,, thanks gma

ur getting off topic sis

and then d cute boy decides he’s gonna take his break too

wow life must be Crazy to have you blessed with his presence

So you see him just like jogging to catch up to you and you hear his little ‘Wait!!’

then you feel all giddy inside because he??? wants to go??? with  you???? wha t

anyway you slow your step a little so he can catch up and then he

he puts his hand on your shoulder WOW PHYSICAL CONTACT

and your heart skipped a beat more like all of them

and then he like,,, he kept his hand on your back while you guys were walking

a whole?? gentleman???

you guys didn’t really talk on the way to the cafe but u really wish u did

because u get in there, you order a snacc, and then u guys sit

in awkward

silence

and its so cringeworthy 

is this embarrassment installment number 3?? why must life Play You Like This

when you’re about to Finally say something, your guys’ orders were called up and he offered to get them

so he went with a small smile and left u with your Stupid Thoughts

but he left for like 5 seconds LMAO

so anyway

he comes back, and you both go to talk at the same time--

‘Oh no u should go first’ and then he laughs

wtf that sounded beautiful

but u don’t even remember what you were going to say

yeah, staring at his face is THAT powerful

‘oh um its ok i kinda forgot haha’

and then its awkward again

embarrassment installment number 4???

of course though you guys introduce yourselves

“My name’s Renjun”

so he just smiles and tries small talk, like why u decided to get a job, or if you’re still in school, your hobbies

all the great stuff ya feel

and by the end of the break you guys are getting closer

i mean you guys arent in any awkward silences anymore

you guys are walking back to your shifts and for the rest of the time

its just you guys messing around

like you guys Got Close hm who knew also this is getting long oops

but it’s the end of your shift,,, and then u go to check out and leav e

and it isnt until you get home that you didnt even

get his number

ayo ma can i get yo numba

so youre just in bed.

questioning life

but hey!! you made a new friend!!

life goes the same for the next few weeks or so,,, and you and renjun become Really Really Close

So close that youre actually leaving your house!! Voluntarily!!

and one day you go in to your kitchen

to see flowers on the table

and a card right next to it lol its in your moms hand 

and you just go up to it cause you see your name on the card 

you McSnatch the card away bc your moms all like ‘you have a secret admirer’ and she gives you the Mom Look

so you just Blush and read the stupid card

‘Please come to work, i miss seeing your pretty face.’ and you go !!!! what !!! 

and so you throw on some pants and the closest t-shirt near you

and then you yell that you’re going to work

so you step into the flower shop and there are wa y more flowers than you remember there to be

like theres,,, one spot that has Just Flowers

and you walk up to it and then 

Renjun comes to scare you what a little shit

and then you yelp!! once more!! 

and then he!! hugs !! you!!

but not before he gives you all of these flowers!!!!

and then he!!! says!! he made the arrangement!! just!! for!!! you!!!

so on the inside you are yelling!! wtfkdfjlsdjg

and you are just wondering w hat did you ever do to deserve this precious

and the he!! says!!

‘Will you be my girlfriend?’ and then he just!! smiles so big!

because you say of course!!! 

He is a whole Catch, he’s caring, knows how to joke around, AND he’s cute!!!

okay but boyfriend renjun who is also your co-worker would be so cute! 

because you would be watering the plants, and then you would see some flowers around with small notes tied with ribbons

with the CUTEST messages on them

and you keep every single one of them in a jar on your desk

by now you have 3 jars filled

thanks for making me the Softest Stan Renjun

and so you would always find cute arrangements in you home!!

and his gma would b watching in the back with That Look

she would think ‘i made a good decision’

BECAUSE SHE DID

his gma: god tier

but anyway florist!renjun who is also your bf!! would be so!! cute!! wtf!!

my heart: melting

honestly my heart cannot handle

SO you guys would just b so happy with each other, life is good,,,

and everytime someone asks how you guys got together,,, youwould always say

lol his grandma like u would Not Believe

but you would always say that the flower shop you both work in, has brought you guys together.

Masterlist

#huang renjun scenarios #unlisted

[clown-bait]

29 Neibolt ST (Monster Roommate AU) Chapter 8.5

Mini chapter for you guys. I have a smut drabble for later. 

warnings: alcohol, fluff, blood, implied smut

Chapter 8.5

Apparently Theres an Echo

——————-

She woke up to the cold sewer air prickling the skin that wast covered by her t-shirt and Pennywise’s long arms. He was still holding her on top of him and she could heard a soft purring from his chest reminding her of a giant cat.

“Nhm Pen are you purring.”

“No”

“Then why are you vibrating”

“No” he mumbled apparently he had fallen asleep too which was rare for Pennywise outside of hibernation.

She sat up and yawned noticing her claws on her hands “Well these are new” they shrunk back into normal fingers.

“Oooh my kitten’s got claws now” the clown purred he was still on his back and began to fold his hands behind his head basking in the after glow.

“What time is it?” she asked.

“No clue don't really keep a working clock down here” he said as he sat up plopping Leech’s beanie he had stolen back on her head. She kissed his cheek and he rolled his eyes at the sweet gesture. “I’m hungry wanna join me?” he said standing up now a devious toothy grin began to grow on his face.

“Dont think I'm the kid eating type Pen sorry.”

“Its almost night the only people out right now are going to be adults and teens. You can watch the master at work!” he waggled his eyebrows and held a hand out to her.

“I think I'm going to make my way home and grab a drink.” she replied taking his hand.

“Such a picky eater. Suit yourself.” he pulled her up and held her for a minute. “I’ll see you soon kitten” he leaned down and kissed her sweetly she smiled into it and brought her hands around his ruffles not noticing his yellow eyes slowly open halfway through the sweet gesture or the small smirk he was wearing when they pulled away from each other. “Bye Pen” she smiled picking up one of her discarded clothing items. He waved at her as he made his way to the tunnels.

—————-

“Nice makeup Leech!” she heard as she walked into the house.

“Uh thanks Chucky?” she said as the doll walked by

“Really brings out the eyes” said Tiff who was laughing at something. Leech was seriously confused she didn't wear makeup that much anymore with her reflection beginning to disappear.  

“Ok guys seriously is there something on my face? Why are you all talking about makeup?”

“Not something toots, someone!” Freddy shouted he always stayed at their place when Drac had laundry day.

She pulled out her phone and snapped a quick selfie. It was the only way she could actually see what she looked like anymore. She nearly dropped it when she saw the red and white make up smeared all over her face and lips.

“PENNYWISE YOU ASSHOLE” she roared making her way towards the basement where the old well was erupting now with loud cackling. Oh he was in so much trouble now.

“Dont worry he's about to get his humiliation too.” Chucky snickered

“What’d he do this time.” Leech asked trying to wipe her face with her flannel.

“Oh I think you already know” said Freddy walking up to her and slapping her hard on the shoulder.

“The whole town knows from what I heard” Tiffany called out.

“Wait….. what?” Leech’s eyes were wide with confusion and horror.

“Didn’t know Jingles could howl like that nice job!” Chucky gave her a thumbs up.

“OH MY GOD”

The entire room died from laughter. She was paralyzed in shock realizing that everyone near a drain just heard what she and the clown had done. Pennywise was walking up from the basement now chewing on a leftover hand. He decided to give his favorite big eared bloodsucker a little scare and used it to tap Leech on the shoulder. When she jumped he saw the look of terror on her face and ginned proudly thinking everyone was still laughing at his prank. “GOT YOU” he sang. His grin turned into a frown when she didn't react.

“……….Pen did you know that the sewer… echoes?” the housemates snickered in the background

Pennywise’s expression became cold with sudden realization. “Oh no” he whispered as Freddy looked like he was about to suffocate from holding back his laughter.

“H-how many people…know.” his eyes began to drift apart.

“Everyone with a drain jingles. Pinhead called by the way he wanted to….. thank you?” Chucky said on the verge of cackling. Leech had slumped down onto her knees in utter defeat.

“Kudos to you hun for putting that ruffled asshole in his place” Tiff managed to tell her between giggles

“I-Im going to k-kill them all” Penny turned to Leech his smile was cracked and deranged and his eyes were going two completely different directions. He had begun to shake and twitch a bit she could faintly hear his soft bells jingle. The entire house exploded with laughter Chucky was actually crying from laughing so hard. Church the cat screamed in surprise from the sheer volume of the noise and ran between Penny’s feet and up the stairs. The clown was so frozen with embarrassment he didn't even notice.

“Say Leech, does he jingle while he fucks? Please tell me he does.” Freddy was finally able to call out to her.

“Pen… I know you said you wouldn't but. Please. Please kill me. I'm ready to die now” she looked over to the clown but he was gone. The basement door slamming shut. Leech snapped dashing for the door.

“PEN NO WAIT!! YOU CANT LEAVE ME HERE! YOU GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE AND TAKE ME WITH YOU! PENNYWISE YOU BASTARD IM NOT DEALING WITH THIS ALONE!” She ran to the door pounding on it as it locked and everyone howled with laughter again.

Leech crept downstairs after she was good everyone had gone to bed she NEEDED a drink. she made a beeline for the fridge planning on making a “Literal bloody marry” as she called it blood and vodka were the main ingredients with whatever she could throw in from the fridge for flavor. she had been getting her blood supply from work Leatherface had been kind enough to save her leftover blood in buckets until she could make her own kills. She really did love that giant maniac, he was like the big brother she never had.

As she opened the fridge door Pennywise flopped out, he had contorted himself into it as a hiding spot from further embarrassment.

“Is everyone gone?” he said with his face on the floor. It was a pitiful sight to see such a proud terrifying creature reduced to a state of utter humiliation.

“Yes. Now tell me where my fucking vodka is before I make you howl again and not in a good way.”

The clown shut the fridge with his foot and flicked it back open the items fully restored. Leech frantically grabbed her mixes and dumped them into a pitcher stirring it quickly before chugging it. Pennywise had rolled onto his back to watch her attempt to drown herself with a mix of blood and alcohol.

“Slow down there firecracker, or were going to have a repeat of last movie night. You argued with Freddy for 20 minutes about song lyrics”

“Freddy was fucking wrong and he still is.”

He stood up and snatched the pitcher out of her hand and drank some himself Leech protested with hisses and growls.

He whistled through his buckteeth after the taste of the drink. “You plan on adding more blood to your vodka dear?”

“After what just happened I don't think I ever want to be sober again.”

Pennywise winced and took another gulp. He didn't usually like the taste of alcohol unless it was extremely sugary but after the humiliation he just suffered he was willing to force it down in an attempt to make the situation less awful “For once I'm agreeing with you” he said.

After a few more drinks the pair stumbled over to a couch Leech sitting between the clowns legs her head against his chest. Apparently the clown cant hold his liquor well.

“Weeeee should watch a movie” Leech said tilting her head up at him

“Like whaaaat” he giggled. The clown was all laughs and jingles when drunk and his coordination went out the window.

“Something don't have to think about. I'm done with using my brain for today”

“As ifff you ever use it” he slurred

“Careful Jingles or I’ll tell everyone exactly what made you howl my name all through the sewer.” she snapped her teeth at his ruffled collar for dramatic effect.

“We’re not talking about that.”

They popped in a cheesy horror from Leech’s slowly growing movie collection, Pennywise couldn't help constantly giving critiques on the monster in a weird attempt to impress her “Its all wrong! This guy sucks I’d be so much better” he'd say.

“He doesn't even have a personality!” Occasionally he'd throw out a playful drunken insult her way just to get a rise out of her.

“Leeeech! Look see he's got no finesse like you!!” he'd giggle at that while affectionately playing with her giant pointy ears and Leech would nip at him causing him to giggle even more.

“Don't be a dick Pen” she shoved his knee.

“Ok, ok, but look at this! Look Leeech! You’re not looking! Leechie I’m trying to help you!”

“You're drunk Pennywise” Leech chuckled taking one of his hands and trying to lace her fingers in with his.

“So are you.” he growled.

“Hey Pen?”

“hm?” he grunted head tilted back from the swirl of the booze

“What are we? Since people are gunna ask now.”

He could have sworn he saw Chucky peaking around the corner with a sign saying “TELL HER YOU LOVE HER IDIOT” which made him wince in frustration.

“Complicated” he replied arms tightening around her

She seemed a bit disappointed with his answer. “You can say that again.” she sighed turning her head to lay against him, both eventually passing out to the flicker of the tv screen.

-------------

Smut drabble on its way later tonight!

#pennywise #pennywise the dancing clown #pennywise the clown #pennywise fanfiction #pennywise x oc #pennywise x reader #monster roommate au

[nebulawriter]

The Christmas Prince: Blind Review

Okay. So this has been in my recommendations on Netflix for a while and it always looks so strange to me. I thought I’d put it on and see what it was about for a night in. 

It started out with some classic pictures of new york with the MUSIC from Jingle Bell Rock, but with weird different lyrics pulled from other christmas songs. 

Strap in folks. We’re in for a ride.

Well this is starting out like every romantic comedy ever. But kudos to ‘Ugly Christmas Sweaters of the Stars’

Aldovia is definitely just Not-Genovia. My goodness. 

Why...is...is this junior editor at a fashion thing covering an international scandal thing? Why aren’t...you know what, nope. nope we’re just gonna ride this out. 

I mean I can already see the formula played out for this rom-com but lets see if there are any surprises

Oh my god. 

This guy is the ultimate gay friend stereotype

Okay I like the dad. 

OH MY GOD the exposition in this movie is just...so on the nose. Just. 

That was the prince, wasn’t it

Like I get that this foreign wedding isn’t the sexiest thing for an american paper...whatever this paper is...but like. I feel like they would either depend on another paper for the news or like. not send a writer at all if they didn’t have one. 

THE ACTING IN THIS MOVIE MY GOD. “More like he’s avoiding the press” *head bob*

THE EXPOSITION IN THIS MOVIE

wow this is. I mean, it’s not like ridiculously laughably bad but its just...not good. 

What are the stakes for why she can’t go home empty handed? I’d have thought she’d WANT to go home, seeing its christmas and she was reluctant to come. But its not like this is her LAST chance at the big break. And him not showing up is still news like, write about that???

THIS ENTIRE PLOT IS BASED OFF OF PURE COINCIDENCE

AAAAAAAA

Aww cute lil girl. 

OH MY GOD SHE BROKE A VASE 

IS THIS ABOUT TO TURN INTO OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB

That castle is definitely a model. 

THE STAKES HERE ARE SO LOW. And why does this level of infiltration need to be necessary for such a low level story?

This acting is going to kill me. 

This is either disability representation or disability porn and I’m leaning towards the porn. 

was that supposed to be her finding him attractive?

This is either bad acting, bad writing or both. I’m inclined to think both.

DICK JOKE

oh god. this is every goddamn romance movie except with so little romance. 

What’s the story they’re investigating? The guy said they’d be having the coronation. Like. Thats the story.

Let me guess. The evil dick cousin takes the throne if the prince abdicates oh my GOD this movie is painful. 

Alright, they’re leaning away from the porn part and moving more into the representation for disability. 

ANOTHER DICK JOKE

YOU COULDN’T HAVE FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS LINE OF SUCCESSION THING OFF GOOGLE OR SOMETHING??

Oh my god a cocky vulnerable asshole he’s literally EVERY Rom com hero oh my GOD

SHE HAS NOT SHOWN ANY SIGNS OF ATTRACTION

and how much does gay bff know about royalty?

I get it. Simon’s an asshole. 

This acting. 

New woman. The rival lover?

This movie is every rom com. Every. Single. One. I’ve never seen them so thoroughly condensed. 

BROOKLYN NINE NINES UP! MOVIE BREAK

okay back to hell

Ah yes, the love rival whom the mother approves of, but the boyfriend doesn’t love anymore. 

she’s...writing...those notes are terrible

I....do like the little girl. Still trying to figure out if they’re just using the disability for sympathy points. But like. She does have a character and I do like her, so I’ll go with it. 

Either way its still the best part of this movie. 

im so bored.

this prince. is so. boring. 

WHAT THE HELL KINDA CHRISTMAS GAME IS THAT

How did THAT reporter get so close to the princess?

Like doesn’t she have guards?

you know, come to think of it, there are probably no guards in all of Aldovia

Richard ain’t gonna show. 

Called it. 

Oh my god why are they surprised Prince Flake disappeared?

yup, he’s ACTUALLY cute and charming. Of course. 

What I want: They change the laws for Emily to inherit the throne, but the Queen rules until she turns 18. 

Yup. There is 0 security in Aldovia

Sledding is cute. 

Literally just...cut the prince out of this movie. Just completely. 

Just make it about the sister, and how there’s no direct male heir. 

I’ve seen plenty movies where the women is just a sexy lamp but honestly the guy here is so easy to remove from this romance. 

This could be such a sweet platonic sister-y movies. 

This is....cute but doesn’t provide any dramatic tension really. Like, at all. 

I hate her notes so much. Partially cause they’re like mine, but she’s a reporter she should know better. 

I mean, they’re friends now, right? Why not just ask prince (Or Emily, honestly) why he doesn’t want the throne. 

ARE THERE NO STABLE BOYS HERE IN ALDOVIA EITHER????

YOURE TRUSTING THE HORSE TO KNOW WHERE ITS GOING????

Have you ever even ridden before?

what...what is happening.

Does the prince come to her rescue.

Alright, that shot was stolen STRAIGHT from Beauty and the Beast. 

THIS WHOLE SEQUENCE IS LITERALLY JUST A SCENE LIFTED FROM BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!

Did they just forget to write a scene and so inserted one from another movie and then write around that?

oh my god this was so boring I almost missed the heart to heart. 

oh, emotional truths in movies are never good when it starts with “You’ll just think I’m a spoiled rich kid anyway”

well, I mean, if your father wrote your mother a riddle that you can’t figure out....I’m assuming SHE can. Right?

that almost-kiss was so forced.

We’re nearing the part where ‘everything goes wrong’

Wait a sec, this is deviating a bit

HO CRAP

How’d she get all this. 

Why tell your best friends about this whole thing? Prince was adopted. Huh. 

Again, stakes. Why do we care that her ‘career’ will be made. 

oh my god. of course. The accidental ‘saw the other girl kiss him’ moment

oh my god.I eye rolled so hard it hurt

“If you like the way you look that much, then baby you should go and love yourself”

YOUR GOING. TO EXPOSE THE STORY. THAT HE WAS ADOPTED. BECAUSE HE KISSED ANOTHER GIRL?????

I give up. 

Thank you, dispensary of fatherly advice. 

well. one thing taken care of. 

What happened to the horse who bucked her off anyway?

Ah yes. The good ole romcom trope. “There’s something that I need to tell you” Man swoops in for kiss. 

my god

Sigh. The rival and the skeevy cousin team up. 

oh no they’re going to find the adoption papers. Dickholes. 

Dammit they successfully made me hate them for hurting the good guys. Fuck. 

Him being adopted explains the GIANT AGE difference between him and his sister, though

What did he say? What...what’s happening?

yeah yeah, the son is afraid of not living up to his dad

OH MY GOD THE PALACE IS TOTALLY A MODEL

.....I do like the little girl. 

Seriously why isn’t this story just about the little girl? 

Get rid of the Prince he’s unnecessary

Make it all about ableism and sexism and blah blah and people trying to deny Emily the throne. Maybe even make HER the adopted one and talk about not-blood families and their importance.

Ah, the makeover section of the romcom has started. 

oh look, its her in an updo and a fancier dress. 

Oooh, smokey eye too. nice. 

Honestly I didn’t think the love rival was so bad at the start. but I think they just didn’t know what to do with her so decided to make her a stereotype. 

Call him Dick.

(his name is prince richard. they should call him a dick.)

I enjoy that she’s wearing sneakers under her dress, I admit. 

Does she even know how to dance?

I guess so

Or not, they clearly choreographed this right before shooting. 

everyone else in the scene is clearly professional dancers, and there the main characters are. Swaying. 

Seriously? One song in and they go to the main event?

The cousin and the rival are going to do something dramatic, aren’t they?

Is this like a marriage? I don’t think people dispute coronations during the ceremony.

Okay, but they need time to like. Verify things right? 

Like. Why does everyone suddenly believe them? and...I just...what?

WHY WOULD SHE ADMIT THAT RIGHT NOW IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY?! COME ON THIS SHOULD GO SOMEWHERE PRIVATE RIGHT? WITH LIKE? 

Oh god this is so...artificial and junk. 

‘things just got so out of hand’

i admit, it’s a PRETTY model of a palace. 

this whole thing is just. so contrived. 

Really? ‘why didn’t you tell me?’ 

Wasn’t a royal birth like....news? in this country?

Aw, mother/son seen. good. 

They got married before the coronation?

What happens if the time runs out? Like. Will they just. Not have a king anymore?

Like what kind of stupid rule?

Seriously, the dad character, his entire dialogue is just fatherly advice. 

Okay. So what I’m getting here is the king hid something in the acorn ornament he made? but. Why did he hide it?

Oh wow, there actually ARE guard in the country.

they might not have a dungeon, but they have jails, surely?

WHY DID HE PLAY WITH RIDDLES!! THE DEAD KING IS AN ASSHAT!!!

hey, there looks like some equality with gender in the quorum of kings council. but like. Its really white. 

See, Emily continues to be the only good thing in this movie. 

This whole thing is so arbitrary, why not. 

Oh look and now he can be king. Why didn’t he want to be king before? Anyway?

Seriously Sophia, make sure he’s King BEFORE you marry of him, geez. 

And he’s king. Cool. 

But where’s the girl? :O

now he has to chase after her and they kiss and then happily ever after. Right?

okay, so she made it to New York. Cool. 

Do they not like puff pieces? This is the obvious blah thing. 

Girl that is a dream job for a wanna be journalist in your 20s. Good lord. 

AHHH I HATE THIS

She has a date? oh. Setup. got it. 

These side characters have no depth at all. They are black best friend and gay best friend. 

Where is he. There he is.

THEY LET THE KING OF A COUNTRY WANDER THE STREETS OF NEW YORK WITH NO GUARDS????

oh, just skippin straight to the proposal. mkay. 

THEY MET TWO WEEKS AGO

hehehhehe my brain had a dirty thought. 

there it is

I can feel Elsa shouting “YOU CANT MARRY A MAN YOU JUST MET”

I could have sworn that ring was purple a second ago. now its blue, 

K

3 minutes left. please let most of those be credits. 

ah yes. Circle cam around this OBVIOUS STAGE SET

No new york street looks like that.

AND WE DIDNT EVEN GET TO SEE EMILY AGAIN.

Welp. Can’t say I didn’t know what I was getting into. 

#The Christmas Prince