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crystalkleure · 5 years

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Could you do a character review of Phi?

ф !!!

PHI….BRATTY BASTARD CHILD…

100/10

YOU CAN TELL I LOVE HIM BECAUSE I AM MAD AT HIM. ONLY THINGS YOU CARE ABOUT CAN HURT YOU LIKE HE HAS HURT ME. Phi has inflicted massive damage upon my emotional state. And Hearts’ emotional state too, actually, but I’ll get to that down below [fight stance]

1. Phi confused the hell out of me until yesterday, and 2. I am not surprised that he and Hearts fought so bitterly [..still hurt like a bitch to see just how bad it was, though. Saw the storm coming and STILL wasn’t prepared for the carnage it wrought ;-;] – I could see that, for some reason, the brothers were not working together to begin with. They were never even physically near eachother, never onscreen together.

On the cruise ship, Phi was observing the tournament participants, taking mental notes on all of them for some reason, and he was particularly interested in the strong ones, like Xhan and Aiga [eventually fixating solely on Aiga, though he did also temporarily pay a bit of close attention to Xhan when he saw the power of Fifth Impact]*. Hearts and Evel sent Kyle to the cruise tournament for the same reason, to gather data on the bladers, particularly the strong ones [like Xhan lmao], and relay the collected data back to Evel for analysis.

But Phi and Kyle were not helping eachother. They weren’t sharing the data they gathered with eachother, or comparing notes or anything. In fact, just the opposite – they seemed to be competing with eachother [like maybe Phi and Hearts wanted to find the same thing, but did not want to share it], though unwittingly in Kyle’s case. Kyle didn’t even seem to know who Phi was, which was odd – it seems like Hearts DEFINITELY would’ve warned his minion about his Potentially Extremely Dangerous brother before putting him on a boat with him – but nevertheless that was an indication that Kyle was not sent to assist Phi. And not only that, Phi was EXTREMELY hostile to anyone he caught observing him, while he was observing everyone else; though he previously had no particular interest in Laban, he destroyed Leopard and got Laban booted from the tournament after Laban made it apparent that he could see Something Was Up with Phi, as a preventative measure to keep him from snooping any further [and specifically what Laban saw was this lmao:]

And when Phi saw Kyle recording his battle data on his phone, Phi also destroyed that phone immediately. I’m figuring that maybe Phi assumed Hearts had planted a spy on the ship as well, though he initially didn’t actually know who it was until Kyle slipped up there**.

Phi was aggressively preemptively-possessive of whatever he was trying to find on that ship, didn’t want anyone else to get it first [especially his brother], and he eventually decided that Aiga Had What He Was Looking For, because it was something to do with resonance. Phi was always very attentive whenever he saw Aiga displaying strong, though unstable, resonance symptoms, like exuding a Scary Dark Aura or doing The Hair Thing, and when Achilles glowed at Aiga, Phoenix often started glowing at Phi in response to that, as well. Phi actively encouraged the bad resonance thing.

Though, he was evidently wrong by thinking that he could get the thing he wanted from Aiga [at least at that time], because now I think ep. 41 finally told me what that actually was:

Phoenix turned purple like this before too, back when Phi battled Aiga. Phi got particularly excited when that happened, as though it was building up to something – but then the buildup fizzled out and he never actually got whatever it was, and so he became frustrated and disappointed with Aiga. Phi said something along the lines of “Not enough, huh…” or “More, huh…” [it was “Mada, ka…”, as though “More is needed” I think? Never fully trust my translations] when Aiga lost to him in ep. 22, as though that was an unsatisfying outcome for him somehow and just winning alone was “not enough”. [He was similarly upset when he broke Achilles in ep. 37, like maybe he was frustrated that he ended up destroying it before he got what he wanted out of it.]

And now, in ep. 41, we see Phoenix turn purple like that again…after it appeared to be sucking the energy/power out of Hades. Phoenix is draining its opponents’ energy in some way – and in a way that is somehow inherently different from Free’s Fafnir’s simple spinpower-stealing technique, as Hearts’ reaction to this is to become progressively more physically exhausted himself, while Phi remains fine and even gets a bit more energetic. Whatever that purple energy is, Phoenix is taking it into itself, causing it to eventually turn that same shade of purple, but Phi’s aura also turns purple like that too, showing that Phi himself has also internalized that stolen energy.

So it’s stealing more than just spinpower here, it’s almost like it’s draining fucking life-force or something. Whatever power Phi is desiring to steal with Phoenix, it looks like it’s something that comes specifically from a bey/blader pair that has achieved strong resonance [maybe not even necessarily “good” resonance, as he thought he could get it from Aiga and Achilles, and he DID get it from Hearts and Hades, who were arguably just as imbalanced/unstable]. So it looks like that’s what was “building up” and getting Phi so excited: Stolen energy. He was just unable to reach full power with what he was able to take from Aiga, is my best guess; like maybe he couldn’t steal it all that time for some reason or something.

Also worth noting: In Hearts’ flashback to when Phi left the Dead Gran, Phi said something about how Hearts had become boring and was no longer fun to “play” with, and that’s why he was going. A few minutes earlier this ep, in the present time, Phi told Hearts to stay away from Aiga because “That’s my toy”. What that says to me, upon Phi returning to challenge Hearts again in the first place, is 1. that Phi reconsidered his opinion of Hearts and had decided he was still “worthwhile” after all, 2. that he’s referring to the bladers he intends to steal the energy from as his “toys” – though “tools” would actually be a more appropriate term tbh, and 3. that he’s still sure he can potentially get something out of Aiga.

And now, because this post is clearly not long enough and I outright refuse to split them up:

🖤 HEARTS TIME!!! 💜

∞/10

Oh my fucking god I have never loved a character so much so fast, and that’s just referring to when he was first introduced. Hearts is on par with Jin from s1 now, as far as favourite characters go for me ;w; #ProtectHearts2k19!!!

Picking up on the resonance thing that this whole group seems so interested in: Hearts’ possession situation is interesting to compare and contrast to Aiga’s.

It’s stated that Hearts has been constantly overshadowed by his brother, Phi always shone brighter, and Hearts’ entire persona is a reflection of that. The way he’s so performative, how he puts on airs to work up a crowd [“You wanna see a REAL champion??” is what he said to the spectators right before he beat Aiga the first time, as an example that springs to mind], the way he constantly taunts his opponents and talks down to them, and I believe he even refers to himself as “ore-same” at times [which basically translates to something along the lines of “The great me”] – those are all symptoms of an inferiority complex. “Please think I’m cool, please think I’m strong, please love me.” He is insecure. Hearts acts so loud and proud because he’s trying to convince himself he’s powerful and impressive, more than he’s trying to convince other people. [Though, psychologically, how that works is by the logic “If a large enough group of people believe a thing, therefore it must be correct, so it makes sense for me to believe it too”]

So, he pushes himself. Pushes himself to keep up his persona. Pushes himself to look impressive, pushes himself to stay strong at all costs. He even pushes himself to ignore pain if that’s what it takes.

Pain like resonance pains. Which, as Achilles has shown us with Aiga, are the way a bey tries to tell its blader that they are pushing it too hard. And we see where that goes.

And man, Aiga felt that so hard because the exact same thing literally just happened to him [at the hands of Phi, no less]. He put himself and his selfish desires above the wellbeing of his bey, using it like a tool instead of treating it as a partner, and the constant neglect and mistreatment resulted in it shattering.

And I call Aiga selfish, and immature, but I call Hearts desperate and damaged. Aiga just wanted to be strong and cool pretty much just for the sake of that in itself, as far as I can see [and thank god he’s realized that what he was doing was so harmful], but Hearts pins his entire self-worth on his ability to stay strong under any circumstances – he hurt Hades while trying to heal himself, in contrast to Aiga, who hurt Achilles due to essentially just not understanding the severity and danger of his situation. Hearts sees the danger and just bullheadedly stands strong as he lets it batter him, rather than just being oblivious to it. Hell, his whole schtick with the columns of literal fire erupting from the stadium to signal his arrival is just another way to show his fascination with being in danger – he withstands the heat.

Also, check how he reacts to those resonance pains again. It hurts but he recovers almost immediately. And sometimes, it seems like he even likes it. He’s getting some sort of pleasure out of that pain, and I’d imagine that’s because he gets a rush out of knowing he’s overcoming it. It hurts, but he doesn’t let it stop him, so having the strong willpower to bear all the pain, to push through it and keep going anyway, is yet another thing that makes him feel powerful.

Hearts also…doesn’t seem to make the right kind of friends. The people he surrounds himself with seem to be entirely self-centered, and unconcerned with his wellbeing, if Evel is any indication. Evel seemed to be the person Hearts cared about the most, but Evel didn’t give a shit about Hearts so much as he just saw Hearts’ situation as an interesting experiment, and an opportunity to gather data. And yet in spite of Evel evidently giving no real indication that he cared about Hearts himself at all, Hearts fuckin moved the guy into his house. Evel has entire rooms full of science and beyblade stuff in the Dead Gran, and free roam of the whole place as well. Also, Count Night. Hearts found Night incredibly amusing, and let him wander around in the Dead Gran in much the same way. Night apparently lives in the air ducts now and Hearts was just A-OK with that. And not only did Night not care about Hearts, he was explicitly a thief and intruder who only came to steal shit. Night literally showed up for the sole purpose of causing Hearts problems, and Hearts just thought he was fantastic and amusing.

And that could actually be yet another thing that just points right back to Hearts enjoying it when something causes him problems, because he’s getting a rush out of overcoming those problems. Hearts being amused with Night and basically saying “Ha-haah, you wanna steal my shit? lmao just try it bitch, let’s dance! I like your style >:)” rather than just. Removing The Obvious Threat From His Household. Makes me think that he must just be getting amusement out of thwarting him.

Mr. Demon also seems to be hired help, rather than a friend, but there’s still Kyle, though. We didn’t even see Kyle in ep. 41, no clue who he’s loyal to yet. I wouldn’t be surprised if Kyle’s just Evel’s buddy and is gonna stick around with him, but I hope to hell that he’s actually at least ONE guy that Hearts keeps around who actually…cares about Hearts…

And now, some Aside Notes that are Actually Important Too but I couldn’t find a way to shoehorn them into that big semi-linear plotline rundown without making this post TOO much more disjointed so I’m just tacking them on down here lmao:

•*Phi didn’t always feel the need to battle people HIMSELF while trying to gauge how powerful they were, he opted out of some battles, choosing instead to just sit back and observe as they fought with eachother. That was the first indicator of Phi’s snotty “I won’t play with it if I don’t think it’s really worth my time” attitude, I think. Lazy shit can’t be bothered unless he’s sure he’ll get something out of it lmao.

…Though, honestly, that itself says that Phi must not really find beyblading particularly fun just for it’s own sake, huh…“getting nothing out of it” means he’s getting no enjoyment/entertainment out of it as well :/ He calls beys/bladers “toys”, but treats them like tools, only seeing a point in using them to work towards an ulterior goal. Hm. Even when he was little, the first thing he asked when he was trying to choose a bey was something like “Which one’s the strongest?”, that was his ultimate concern. Like there’s no such thing as just screwing around, killing time, and having fun with a hobby unless you’re achieving something [like bettering yourself somehow]…Could be that that right there is the root of why he bullied Hearts so much, actually. See the flashback soccer match. Hearts was trying to have fun, while Phi was being serious, and seemingly looking down on Hearts for it. Phi did not play with his brother, he competed with him. “I am strong, and you are weak. You are inferior. I am clearly the superior brother.” Hearts’ inferiority complex seems to have been caused by Phi having a major superiority complex, and stepping on Hearts to prop himself up and assert it. Nasty. Makes me wonder wtf put the apparent belief in Phi’s head that Fun Is Pointless Unless It Is Also Productive in the first place. Parental pressure? If it was that, then why didn’t Hearts get the same sort of treatment? Or maybe he did and just didn’t take it to heart…

• **Honestly, a thing that keeps snagging me is just Kyle’s lack of familiarity with Phi. Like, if Hearts sent him to figure out who Phi became the most interested in [in order to intercept that person to prevent Phi from getting to them], then he’d have to be told who Phi was, so that doesn’t work. And the possibility that Kyle was purely on a random data-gathering expedition for Evel, and Evel and Hearts didn’t expect him to run into Phi at all, just seems…really unlikely. Like, they were both after the same type of people. Kyle was definitely there because of Phi being there, even if Kyle didn’t know it, so I guess what I’m stuck on is the fact that idk why Hearts cared so much about what Phi was doing? It seems the most reasonable to assume that he intended to interrupt Phi’s plans, though he has shown us, by walking right into them and getting Hades smashed and stolen, that he didn’t actually know what Phi’s plan WAS. Maybe it was just pure sibling rivalry, like “I don’t know what you’re doing, but I’m gonna find out and then do it better!”? I might have the answer if I could actually understand what was being said, haha…

•And, last but not least: ARE THESE GUYS ALIENS OR NOT, BEYBURST????

Because, like, we’ve see them as children now, evidently on Earth, with a human butler, living in the Dead Gran all those years ago as well, ON EARTH…

But PHI’S EYES…AND THE METEOR…HE WAS UNAFFECTED BY THE FLAMES, THEY DIDN’T BURN HIM…the impact didn’t kill or even harm him, whether he was on/in the meteor or just near the strike site…Humans don’t survive shit like that?? Did Phi somehow fake a fucking meteor strike?? For dramatic effect?? How’d he do that? Even Hearts and Evel seemed perplexed by the crater.

Also, there’s Phi’s proper introduction to the main crew. He was described by DJ as an “invincible/undefeated, immortal blader who nobody knows much about, he just showed up all ~mysterious~ and it’s rumored he fell to Earth on a meteor!”, and I’m just ???

1. If Phi hadn’t been on Earth for very long, that nicely explained why he was not only unknown but undefeated, if he just…hadn’t ever been recorded losing a battle simply because he hadn’t been recorded battling much at all yet, but 2. CLEARLY PHI HAS BEEN HERE AWHILE BC CHILDHOOD FLASHBACK, so was he just in hiding that whole time before starting the meteor rumor and making his dramatic entrance? Maybe, actually, because in Hearts’ flashback to Phi leaving the Dead Gran, both he and his brother looked to be the exact same age they are now, so that flashback must not have taken place that long ago…did Phi just live in the Dead Gran his whole life and never leave until recently, when he randomly decided he wanted to wreak some havoc because he was bored?? If that is the case, how is he so strong, if there was really no one to practice beyblading with but Hearts? Did he really only battle with his brother alone for so many years? hhhhhh ep. 41 answered 500 questions but made 5000 more…

!!DISCLAIMER BTW: I don’t speak any reliable amount of Japanese and I’m actually…not caught up on the subs, either…I’m interpreting visuals and tone-of-voice alone 99% of the time here, feel welcome to correct me if I’ve gotten anything wildly wrong because I’m sure there’s no way I’m 100% right when I can’t actually understand what I’m listening to

#FUCK I'VE BEEN WORKING ON THIS FOR SO LONG AAAAAAAAA #AND I'M GONNA REGRET NOT CLEANING IT UP MORE THAN THIS BUT I'VE GOT A STREAM TO CATCH IN A FEW MINUTES #Also I tried to clean it up already and failed repeatedly as you can see lmao #Beyblade Burst #Beyblade Burst Chouzetsu #Long post #Hearts #Phi

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sgtcalhouns · 5 years

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College AU, Ch. 21

let’s have a reprieve from all the angst, shall we? not too much longer to go after this, so i hope you enjoy!

It would have been easy for Felix to call Tamora; even easier to send her a text. But the sudden, frantic need to see her overpowered these more logical options and urged him to sprint across campus in search of her. He couldn’t be certain where she was but he knew that she was usually eating dinner in the dining hall around this time, so that’s where his feet carried him, his burning muscles doing nothing to discourage his journey. As he barreled through the door, he caught the attention of a few of the people sitting near the entrance. Among them was Tamora, who was just sliding her phone into her pocket when she caught sight of him.

“Tammy,” he panted, rushing up to her. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

“I think it’s all been said, Felix,” she responded, her tone cold and her jaw set.

Without another word, she stood from her table, carrying her tray over to the trash can.

“What do you mean?” he asked as he trailed after her. “I’m... I’m sorry I was so secretive before but I want to explain.”

“I don’t think this needs any explaining,” she snapped, unlocking her phone and pushing the screen into his face. Felix felt his blood run cold as he realized what had happened: Turner had sent the photo of Mary kissing him to Tamora.

“Please, let me explain,” Felix said. “I promise that’s not what it looks like.”

“So it’s not you kissing your ex-girlfriend?” she asked matter-of-factly.

“W-Well, technically, yes, that is what’s happening but--”

“Just save it, okay?” she said. “I don’t want to hear any more excuses about this, I’m done.”

“But if you would just listen--”

“I’ve heard enough,” she said, clenching her jaw in an attempt to keep the tears that had begun to form contained. She headed for the door.

“Tammy, wait!” Felix shouted as he stood up on a nearby chair.

The sheer volume of his voice was enough to capture the focus of most of the students in the dining hall as it echoed through the large room, and Tamora reluctantly turned back around to face him. Now that he had drawn so much attention to himself, he was beginning to regret this course of action. However, he was here now, Tamora was standing in front of him, and he wasn’t going to put this off any longer.

“I know you’re mad at me and I understand why,” he began. “And if you never want to speak to me again after this, I get it. But you deserve the truth.”

Although her resentful expression remained unchanged, Tamora nodded for him to continue.

“A long time ago, I did something that really hurt Turner. I didn’t know it at the time, and he’s still upset by it, which is why he’s lashing out like this. He found this note that I wrote.” He pulled said note from his pocket and held it up for her to see. “He took it and gave it to Mary, letting her think I wrote it for her. She came to my apartment under the impression that I wanted to get back together with her.”

Tamora immediately recognized the paper in his hand as the very same scrap of paper that had ignited their earlier fight. Things began to make more sense as he described the situation.

“She kissed me, and somehow Turner got a picture when it happened. That’s what he sent to you today.” He gulped as he readied himself to finally confess his feelings to Tamora. “But I didn’t write this note for her. I wrote it for you.”

By this point, most of the people in the cafeteria had turned back to their previous conversations--they had all seen stranger things during their time in college. With unsteady hands, he unfolded the note and held it out in front of him. He looked straight into Tamora’s eyes as he recited the words that had taken him so long to perfect that he had them memorized.

“It’s time for me to come clean about my feelings. I tried to deny it when I told you I love you because I was afraid. You’re the first person who’s ever made me feel this way, and I didn’t want to scare you away. But the truth is, I’m in love with you.”

Felix felt his eyes grow damp with tears as he finally got those words off his chest. The moment had been far from perfect, but a massive weight had been lifted off his shoulders at finally having bared his soul to her.

“I’m sorry I kept that from you for so long,” he said, his voice brittle as he tried to speak around the lump in his throat. “I wanted to protect you, but I should have been smart enough to realize that you don’t need protection, from me or anyone else.”

“Felix...”

Tamora had remained frozen for most of his speech. His declaration didn’t necessarily surprise her--she had already heard him admit to these feelings before--but she hadn’t been fully aware of how much it meant to him to say those words to her. Seeing him like this, completely vulnerable as he stood on a chair in the middle of a crowded cafeteria and laid his heart out for the world to see, ignited something deep within her.

“I know you’re not ready to love me back just yet,” he said, one or two stubborn tears falling down his cheeks. “But if you could let me love you, I would be the happiest guy on this campus.”

“Get down here,” she demanded.

Felix stepped down from the chair, approaching her with caution. Her expression was difficult to read, and he feared that he had already caused enough damage to lose her for good. As soon as he was within arm’s reach, she grabbed his shirt and yanked him close to her, planting her lips on his. He responded with great enthusiasm, winding his arms around her. Everything around them was long forgotten as they clung to each other, their kiss breathless and wild. She pulled away, looking at him fiercely.

“You really don’t know anything, do you?” she asked with a firm voice, although a hint of a smirk was playing at her lips.

“Well, I-I...”

“I think it’s my place to say whether or not I’m ready to love you,” she said, her smile slowly growing.

“Wait, I--What?”

“I love you, Felix,” she said, her expression becoming almost bashful in the aftermath of her confession.

As Tamora’s words rang in his ears, Felix was completely overcome with emotion. There was nothing he could do to stop himself from leaning in toward her once more and kissing her like it was the last thing he would ever do. He couldn’t get the image of her shy smile and flushed cheeks out of his mind, and he never wanted to forget how beautiful she had looked in that moment she had told him she loved him.

“Excuse me, um...” An unfamiliar voice broke them out of their lovestruck haze. They parted and looked toward its source, finding a student neither of them recognized standing before them. “Would you mind moving out of the way? You’re blocking the salad bar.”

The now-embarrassed couple quickly untangled themselves from each other and moved out of the way, instead choosing to take a seat at a nearby table. Felix scooted his chair as close as possible to Tamora’s, unable to whip the smile off his face, despite the slight humiliation of having their kiss interrupted in such a way. He laid his note out on the table.

“I spent a lot of time writing and re-writing this,” he said with a chuckle. “Somehow I felt like I could never get it quite right. There just aren’t enough words to tell you how much I love you.”

“I think it’s perfect,” Tamora said, taking the note in her hands. “Short and sweet. Reminds me of someone I know.”

“I love you,” he replied, the words tasting sweet on his tongue. It had never felt so good to say them before. He pressed a kiss to her cheek. “And I really am sorry about everything. If I had just bucked up the courage to tell you how I felt sooner, we never would’ve gotten in this mess.”

“You’re not the only one who’s been waiting too long to say those words,” she admitted.

“I still can’t believe it,” Felix said with a shake of his head. “Hearing you say that means more to me than anything in the world. I don’t know how I got so lucky.”

“Well, you’d better believe it, because it’s true,” Tamora teased. “I love you.”

He kissed her again, unable to hold back as her words sent a rush of butterflies into his stomach. Breaking the kiss, he leaned his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and just enjoying this moment of closeness. It hadn’t been long since their fight, but it felt like forever since the last time he had been with her like this. After taking a moment to reflect on everything that had just happened, a thought occurred to him.

“...We just did that in front of the entire cafeteria,” he said.

“...We sure did.”

“Well, I had planned on telling Dr. Persi today anyway. That’s where I was going to go after talking to Turner,” Felix said. “But after I had that conversation, I just needed to see you, to tell you how I feel. I couldn’t concentrate on anything else.”

“You were going to tell Dr. Persi?” she asked.

“I had hoped that maybe if I came out and told him the truth, I could convince him not to punish you, or at least not as harshly,” he explained. “I didn’t want to have that hanging over my head anymore, not with Turner trying to blackmail us. And I don’t care what punishment he gives me, as long as it doesn’t affect you.”

“Felix, you don’t have to take the blame for this,” she said. “I’m just as guilty as you are.”

“But I’m the one he entrusted with more responsibility as a teaching assistant, I deserve a worse punishment,” he said, taking her hand in his. “You’ve worked so hard to get where you are now, I don’t want anything I’ve done to jeopardize that.”

“This is something we did, Felix.” She squeezed his hand. “I think we should tell him together.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, looking at her seriously. “Because I don’t have a problem taking the fall for this.”

“And I would do the same for you,” she replied. “So let’s do this together.”

“If you say so,” he said with a small smile. His expression became suddenly meek as he continued. “But, um... Do you think we could wait until tomorrow to do that?”

“Sure, but why?” Tamora asked curiously.

“Well, I just... I was hoping maybe you’d like to come over tonight, because I...” he fidgeted nervously for a moment before finding the right words. “I just don’t want to think about anything else but you.”

It almost made Tamora laugh, his timid request. Moments ago, he had practically shouted his love for all to hear, yet he was bashful as he asked her to come over for the night. She was positive she would never fully understand him, but she was just as certain that she would never stop finding his sheepish affection adorable. Giving him a quick kiss on the cheek, she replied.

“I’d love to.”

#hero's cuties #wir fanfiction #wreck it ralph #sgt calhoun #fix it felix #my fic #ok but THIS is the scene i've been waiting to write the most #like this specific setup was planned the second i picked the college au back up #so i really enjoyed writing this

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drabbletale · 6 years

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Overcome - PuppyBerry drabble

After a rough break-up, FS!Papyrus chose his brother, his universe, over Swap!Sans and the Swap universe. It was easy and familiar for someone terrified of change and anxious in a too-gentle universe. But when his brother finds out where he had been, he ends up back at Blue’s door... tail between his legs.

Angsty with a happy ending? I love this pairing.

I’ll probably be posting more puppyberry in the future. I’m obsessed. Probably shorter ones though, unless an idea comes to me.

Words: 1693

Pup stood completely still as the smaller skeleton’s hands gently played at his hips. “I knew you’d come back.” His smile was almost… sad. Blue’s eyes seemed to shine against the dim lights in his dining room, grip keeping Pup pinned against the side of the dinner table. Their teeth clacked together and Pup trembled at how soft Blue’s body was. Always seemed to be.

“my brother kicked me out when he found out i’d been… with you.” He tried to keep his voice neutral, not letting the pain in his chest show through his words…. though his face was flushed and he knew he must look exhausted. “where was I supposed to go?” He said as Blue slowly backed away from the other, once again staring into his eyes. He seemed to be hiding his emotions as well, it was a strange look for his baby Blue.

“And what exactly were you planning to do when you got here? What did you expect I would say?” Blue gave him a small smile, grasping his hips more firmly as he pressed against him. Pup gasped quietly, hands now gripping the edge of the table, but made no attempt to get away. “Do you expect me to let you stay here? Welcome you with open arms and take care of you?”

Pup had the common decency to look ashamed, closing his eyes and turning away from Blue, voice calm. “of course not.”

“Ah…” Blue let out a humorless chuckle and shook his head. “I get it. You want to be punished.” His body was flush against the other’s now, teeth just barely grazing over Pup’s jaw. “For failing, right? Not being who he wanted to you to be. For being weak and giving in to someone as ‘good’ as me.” Pup tensed, a sharp pain overtaking his soul and making him whine. “Maybe you even want to die…. For me to kill you?”

“m-m’lord…” His breathing was labored, mind completely fogged over by the proximity of the other skeleton.

“I AM NOT YOUR BROTHER!”

Pup felt Blue push away, but didn’t open his eyes. “sorry, Blue.”

A short exhale of breath from Blue could have been a sigh or a scoff, he wasn’t sure. “And I am NOT going to kill you. You can just let the guilt eat you alive, okay? B-because I… I’m not going to be used any more. I-I deserve to be happy. My brother w-wants me to be happy and he says I deserve it. And… And killing you… getting some sort of sick r-revenge… h-has never made anyone happy. So whatever sick satisfaction you think you’ll get from me punishing you, is just too bad!”

There was a complete silence between them, until Pup opened his eyes to look at Blue. He tried to blink away the tears, but they simply fell down his pale cheekbones and over the ridged lines of his jaw. Pup couldn’t help the small smile. “i am… so happy…. for that….” He closed his eyes again and placed a hand over where his soul sat in his chest, burning with untapped desire. “i want nothing more than your happiness now. if forgiveness is what helps you, then it’s what i want you to do for me.”

Blue was taken aback by this. “No more of this… this… pretending I’m your brother? You can get over it? Just like that?!” His voice was harsh, perhaps a bit of fear laced within it.

The taller skeleton only shook his head, still with a small, sad smile. “m’lord has spoken and he no longer wants me around. our relationship is over. it’s been destroyed, torn apart by my indecisiveness.” Blue looked to the floor and nodded. About what, Pup wasn’t sure, but he continued anyway. “and if you want me to live with my guilt, i understand. i only want what is best for you, blue. despite everything that happened… honey…. despite everything that i’ve done to you, i only want you to understand that i was doing it all for you.” He stared at Blue’s more gentle facial features, as he seemed to be gazing out of a window, deep in thought. “or rather… for who i believed you to be. i… i have to adapt to this universe and its rules… honesty and love… to understand exactly who you are.”

Blue looked back to him now with a stern expression. “Finally.”

He received another small smile in response, “you’re better than i could ever dream to be.”

Another short silence went between them as Blue looked around the room, seemingly everywhere but at Pup. “How did you even find me? I’ve moved since then…” He crossed his arms, but to Pup it looked more like he was hugging himself. “I did everything to hide my tracks…”

“you’re not very skilled at it. and the underground is small, it’s not like you moved to another universe.” Pup played with the edges of his sleeves, his heart sinking. He tried not to sound desperate. “please don’t do that…”

Blue rolled his eyes and shook his head. “My universe is perfect for me, thank you.”

Pup wiped away his own tears with the back of his sleeve, suddenly realizing that they were still there. He must have looked like a babybones. “i’m sorry for the pain i’ve caused you. i don’t expect you to forgive me. i will leave you now…” He stood straight and zipped up his hoodie to his chin. He could still feel Blue’s hands on his hips…. though they had long since been removed.

Blue shook his head, looking over the other. He still seemed to be holding himself, but his body had stopped being as tense as it was when Pup had first arrived. “And where are you going to go, huh? You can’t exactly go around looking like that.”

“what’s wrong with how i look?” And there was the growling voice Blue remembered.

He sighed and let his arms fall again, “Do you see the way I dress?” Pup’s gaze seemed to eat him up as he nodded, “You’re from a Fell universe. You dress really dark, your teeth are sharp but not naturally, and the way you sulk around and glare at people is scary. Monsters like me will notice you in a crowd right away.”

“there is not a single person in the multiverse like you, blue.” Pup seemed to be sinking into himself, as he eyed the door, but made no move toward it.

“Yes there is.” Animated as ever, Blue’s hands were at his hips. “I’m a normal monster with normal hopes and dreams and a normal life! I am not special, okay?”

“you are to me.” It was said with the finality of a goodbye and Pup turned to leave, worn shoes shuffling as he walked. Blue stood in silence as he left the dining room and through the front door. It closed softly behind him, but the noise still made the nervous skeleton jump a bit. It wasn’t fair! None of this was fair at all!

“Oh stars…” He said softly to the room, shaking his head slowly, “What am I supposed to do?”

And he felt it. He felt an emotion from the deepest part of his soul, an ache, sorrow and he knew in his heart that he was the only one who could answer his prayers. There was a voice from within, calling out in his mind. 'It would be okay if you gave in’, it told him. 'You cannot change the way you feel. You want him and that will never ch-’

“UGH.” He covered his face and grit his teeth. “JUST SHUT UP! I-I can’t… he’ll hurt me again, I just can’t. I can’t…”

'Help him.’ The dark voice insisted, 'Help your puppy. Only he can make you happy.’

He wanted to rip his own soul out of his chest, but the voice was gone. The pressure in his soul had dissipated with it and he was left alone and tired.

“P-Puppy…. But he….”

He lied to me. But I promised… I promised I would forgive him… He didn’t let me say it!

Blue burst through the front door and down the driveway to where Pup was still walking. “Wait! Don’t go!” He was already trembling by the time he was near the other skeleton, hands aching to reach out to him. “Don’t leave… Not yet…” He caught his breath and looked to see the taller monster staring down at him, worry etched in his pointed features. “I forgot to tell you something…. I just have… to say this…”

Pup nodded, taking a step closer, “what is it, honey?”

They looked into each other’s eyes and Blue felt a small flood of relief wash over his soul. “I forgive you.” He said it with perfect honesty, but Pup looked almost heartbroken.

“what?” He replied in a near-whisper, eyes wide and shoulders tensed.

“I said… I forgive you.”

He approached Pup then, hands outreached towards him and a cautious smile on his face. The other skeleton seemed to shrink at the sight of the oncoming skeleton, but he didn’t back away. Hands were placed on either side of his cheekbones as Blue pulled him down into a kiss. He wrapped his arms around Pup’s neck, holding him close as he felt the other press back.

Slowly, so slowly, he backed away enough to rest her forehead against Pup’s. “thank you….” He had never thought Pup could speak so desperately, so full of raw emotion, in two simple words. He pulled Blue into a tight embrace, bodies completely pressed against one another. Blue felt large hands stroking down his spine.

“Stay here then…. With me?” He buried his face into the warmth of Pup’s hoodie. “You have nowhere else to go…”

“i will, blue. i will forever be indebted to you, for this kindness… after everything that i have done. i will do anything for your love… for your attention.”

“N-no, that’s…. I just want you to stay here, not…” He sighed and relaxed in the comfortable arms. “We’ll work on that.”

#puppyberry #bbqtacos #fontcest #referenced #fellswapcest #just what i needed #another blog and another fandom to obsess over #fs!papyrus #is def not as hardcore as he could be here #more of a kicked puppy tbh #oops

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