Dexter against the thieves dkngkdsjgdn, that is SO funny to me
I'm just imagining the NG ending for Hollow Sorrows now, but instead of Fat Thief saying he got scared by the giant spider, it's that him and Thin Thief "got chased around by a crazy guy in a hazmat suit with a knife"
Also
TT: ...It wasn't a hazmat suit.
FT: It wasn't? But it was yellow and had a big zipper!
And then the two argue over whether Dexter's exterminator outfit qualifies as a hazmat suit until Candy Dealer tells them to can it
FIRST OF ALL, YES. At the beginning of the episode, after Dex scares the thieves shitless and Lila kicks them out, she's all like
L: Dexter, how many times have i told you to not stab people!
D: I wasn't gonna actually stab them!...Not mortally, anyway.
L: How did you even get in?!
D: Oh, that's easy! I just snapped a window lock open, I was way too worried when I saw those guys get into your house :D
And he's like so genuinely happy and wanting to help that Lila just immediately gives up the scolding.
Also, do you think the cult would know of Dexter and his "issues", and be interested in him since they seem to take a liking in having serial killers, arsonists and all kinds of criminals on their side? Since in the Canon timeline they knew Dexter was stuck in the doll but decided not having him around was gonna be easier since he wasn't part of the cult anyway so they just left him there to rot?
Bonus for the Dexter Lives AU One-Shot (TW for implied Violence):
Two thieves, one fat and the other thin, crept quietly through the house, scouring for anything that looked to be of value. They already had a small bag of items, heaved up over their shoulders, when the fat thief suddenly let out a small shriek.
“Will you shut it?!” the tall thief hissed, turning to his companion, only to see something standing in front of them in the dark. He instantly froze, as the other thief shakily aimed the flashlight at the looming shadow to reveal–
… A normal guy. Granted, he was wearing a yellow jumpsuit and what appeared to be a gas mask, but he was still just. A guy. He seemed rather cheery too, as he introduced himself with a wave. “Hello there! I am Dexter the exterminator!”
“Uh…” The two thieves glanced at one another, and the fat thief returned his wave. “Hi? What are you doing here?”
Dexter’s eyes darted between the two, taking in their appearances. His eyes lingered on the bag full of items, and the thieves could almost see his smile widening under the mask. They grew wary as he began to walk towards him, boots thumping against the ground, as he continued in the same cheery tone, “I kill rats, bats, cats, and everything fast! Unfortunately for the two of you…”
His cheeriness took on a sinister tone, and the two gulped, backing up from him. He stopped just within arm's reach, one of his hands hidden behind his back. “… you two are a bunch of rats, scurrying around in a place where you don’t belong and stealing what’s not yours.”
The two thieves looked at one another, eyes wide, before trying to escape. They didn’t even get to take one step before the exterminator got them, their screams filling the night.
(They’re not dead, just heavily wounded probably.)