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#try my best to help them instead. but fcking compromise.
holylacydoll · 3 years
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🖤
#like it really haunted me. i had intrusive thoughts worried about her for like a month and i could barely sleep#my friend told me to stop letting it bother me so much. bc even his sister who these things had happened to didn't act this way.#and idk i cant help it. i lost sleep when my like then 12 year old cousin was assaulted by another cousin who she was close with.#i just. it makes me so sick. but its so much worse when its someone you know personally suffering the way you did. and you cant do anything#i just want to keep all the nice people safe & then castrate & t*rture everyone who's hurt someone i cared for. everyone who's ever hurt#anyone in such an awful way. i really hate violence bc i was ab*sed and 99% of the time will always try to solve things in a clean way but#my blood just absolutely boils and i feel disgusting. i hate anyone who ruins innocence and purity and trust in such a way. they're just#monsters. how can you live with yourself? i hate them. they have no souls. i would personally t*rture them all but i wouldn't kill them.#bc i think they dont deserve death. death is escape. i would want them all to rot in prison for their remaining days & just be hurt. often.#its sick & sadistic of me to want this. but i dont care. i hate them.#in the future alex told me we can adopt a child or two. &i really really want to adopt children who were also victims of abuse. i can't take#the pain of their past away but i just want to help give them a better future.#ideally i wouldn't give birth at all & just adopt but alex wants us to have kids or whatever.#i hope im infertile ugh. but i agreed to it. even though i only want to adopt. so this is compromise for us.#i dont see the point in bringing more life into this cruel world when i could just take in those already victim to it's antics and#try my best to help them instead. but fcking compromise.#i cant help them all and i wish i was dead#why do i have to live in a world like this#i want to die i want to die i want to die i wajt to die#let me leave this fcking shitty world behind i HATE EVERYTHING WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE#i feel the screaming at the top of my lungs & throwing sh*t. i hate the human race with every fiber of my being and im ashamed to exist as#part of it. i wish that earth would get hit by a gamma ray burst and that we'd all die#well no. other animals are good. besides dolphins & other animals that r*pe & stuff. i really hate dolphins. they're considered very smart#but apparently with higher intelligence comes terrible morals? like i want all the sweet animals to live. ones who only kill to survive.#not for fcking sport. lately ive been having crises over my arachnophobia. im so terrified of spiders that i cannot move if one's where i#need to go. but like. spiders are pretty good animals if you think about it and most are harmless. but i still have my brother or cat kill#them for me. i really do this with any bugs. but its so cruel and unfair. to cut an innocent creature's life short bc it scares me. it's#very hypocritical. i get bullied and judged for how i look. yet when i see bugs all logic goes out the window & i do the same to them.#all i can think about is getting it away from me. i think most people view me the way i view spiders. i should sympathize with them and not#judge them for how they look on the outside. but im so scared
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some-kindofgnome · 4 years
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Kinktober #27: The Lake: Bakusquad
In which you and Kirishima take a trip to the lake for a little class reunion.
Characters: primarily Kirishima / f!reader, but also Jirou, Sero, Kaminari, Bakugou and Mina / f!reader AND background Kaminari / Jirou
Warnings: smut (18+ please!) aged-up characters, pro-hero Kiri, Bakugou, Denki, Jirou, Mina and Sero, group sex, polyamory, brief mentions of drinking, not a whole lot of attention paid to protection (sorry...)
Notes: Today’s prompt was “Orgy.” You can probably tell by how many fcking PEOPLE are involved lmao. I... had trouble with this one! This was tough. There are a lot of limbs to keep track of. But I wouldn’t be opposed to re-visiting this dynamic again soon, with more time to play around a little. 
I know it says 1-A on the masterlist, but it really did turn out to be more of a Bakusquad thing, sorry!
Kinktober Masterlist
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You’re folding one last sweater into your weekend bag and zipping it up when Kirishima swings by to pick you up.
After a very long, hot summer week at the office, your boss let you go a couple of hours early on a slow Friday afternoon- just soon enough to catch the early train home. It turned out to be very lucky indeed, since Kirishima’s already here and you’re just finishing up your packing.
Then again, it’s not your fault you’ve been agonizing over what to bring.
The buzzer by your door sends your heart leaping into your throat, but it only takes a quick peek out the front window to confirm that it’s Kiri. He knows that you’ll look before you head for the door, so he’s stepped back from the front stoop a little and shoots you a bashful wave with one hand shoved into his pocket.
You melt. He’s cute enough to put your nerves to rest.
“Good afternoon, milady,” he greets with a sweep of charming enthusiasm when you pull the door open for him. He bows playfully before stepping into your apartment. “I will be your escort this weekend. Show me to your luggage.”
“I don’t think there’s enough of it to be called ‘luggage,’” you giggle. You slip an arm around his neck and push a kiss against his cheek.
“Hi.”
He gasps, pressing his fingers to the spot where your lips touched.
“Such unprofessional behaviour. I’m going to have to report this, you know.”
“Shut up.” You bat at his chest. The bastard, in all his well-muscled glory, barely flinches. “Let’s go before I change my mind.”
The threat’s playful, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t consider it, it in the darkest hours of the night before.
Every year, on the last weekend in July, Kirishima gets together with some old friends from UA. They rent a little cabin out by the lake, drink, party, and catch up. You’ve been dating just under a year, so you’ve never been to one of these before. Even though you’ve met everybody who’s going to be there individually, it’ll be the first time you see them as a group.
And Kirishima’s known them for ten years. You like to think you know him pretty well, but compared to them, you’re strangers.
“It’s not too late to,” he breathes, pausing to glance at you with a moment’s sincerity.
“No,” you brush. “No, I’m fine.” You put your hands on his forearms and squeeze gently. “Nervous, but… that’s what the drive up is for, right?”
“Yeah.” He flashes you a grin that steals your heart over and over again, sweeping you and your little suitcase out the door.
The drive is breezy and surprisingly quick, given the expected level of weekend cottage-country-traffic. You blast the radio and turn it down during the commercials. But you can’t help the sinking dread that pits in your stomach when the ETA in your navigation app drops from an hour and a half to forty-five minutes to five minutes.
The drive was supposed to be your chance to settle your nerves. You’re not ready to be here yet.
When you pull down the sloped gravel driveway of the cabin, there are already three cars there. You recognize Bakugou’s sleek Audi, but you can only assume that the other two belong to the rest of the crew.
So everyone else is already here. Makes sense. Nobody else works 9-5, so they probably cut off early to get here.
Doesn’t make you any less freaked out.
Kirishima insists on grabbing both of your bags. He shoulders his way into the cabin with excitement building in every muscle. You can see it from ten feet away. He’s thrilled to be here. That thought honestly helps, for a hot minute.
Until you hear the voices that drift from inside.
The whole cabin’s lit up with savoury, beautiful smells when you step inside. The kitchen’s crowded- Bakugou’s chopping vegetables and doing his best to shoo everyone out of his way while he sautés and chops and glazes and bakes.
“Jesus Christ. Finally. Will you get these assholes outta my way?” Bakugou snarls, waving his knife around as soon as he catches sight of the two of you.
Before you can even laugh properly at Bakugou’s temper, there’s a high-pitched squeal of your name from behind him, and he’s abruptly shoved against the edge of the counter as a bright pink blur streaks around the island and launches herself at you.
“Hiiiii,” Mina coos, pressing a kiss to your cheek after she’s given you a tight squeeze.
The rest of the party filters in around you- Sero and Denki crowding not-so-subtly around the new addition to their little crew while Jirou makes her way over at a respectful pace. It becomes obvious to you almost immediately that you’re the first girl Kirishima’s ever brought to one of these.
You want to let that feel special. Instead, the intimidation only spikes.
You need to relax.
“Here, babe,” Mina sighs, shooing the boys away from you. “Kiri’ll take your bags upstairs. Let’s get you a drink.”
She grabs your hand and drags you toward the bar cart in the living room. Kirishima disappears up the stairs, but before you know it, he’s re-appearing. So is everybody else. The smells from the kitchen are growing unbearably tantalizing.
Bakugou hollers when dinner’s ready.
He’s done glazed pork chops with some kind of gorgeous mango slaw- indulgent and delicious, but light enough that none of you will be too stuffed at the end of the meal. You sit between him and Kirishima and everybody catches up.
Mina and Sero are starting an agency together. Denki and Jirou found a place together just outside of the city. And Bakugou, of all people, has just taken on his first U.A. intern.
You feel sorry for the poor kid already.
Once the dinner dishes have been cleared, you’re starting to feel more at ease. The conversation flows easily between the group of you, and you’re kind of killing it with the one-liners. Even Bakugou gives a dull chuckle when you land a particularly good one.
But the real purpose of this weekend can’t be put off forever.
“Babe,” Mina coos eventually, leaning over Kirishima to settle a hand on your thigh. “I am so excited that you’re here. Do you know how long it’s been since we had anybody new to play with?”
“Mina,” Kirishima scolds. “Don’t scare her.”
“What?” Mina sits up. “You said you were gonna tell her before you brought her here. Kiri, tell me you talked to her.” She looked up at you with wide eyes. “He told you, didn’t he?”
“Yes,” you promise, holding your hands up to settle her. “He talked to me. I agreed to come knowing full well what we’re here for. But… I’m still nervous as hell over here.”
“Don’t worry,” Mina promises. “We’re gonna take good care of you, sweets. Besides, you and Kiri and Bakugou have before, right? So between them, it’s basically like you’ve already slept with all of us.”
She’s got a point. But that doesn’t change the fact that your cheeks are like molten lava just thinking about it.
Every year, on the last weekend in July, Kirishima gets together with some old friends from UA. They rent a cabin out by the lake, drink, party… and fuck. You’ve shrugged monogamy with him before. Mina’s right- Bakugou’s joined you on a few different occasions. But this is something you’ve never even thought of trying before.
Still, Kirishima makes you want to take risks. He’s always been good that way- encouraging you to push your comfort zone without compromising your boundaries. When you first talked about this weekend, he’d framed his little pitch with the promise that if you weren’t comfortable with it, he was happy to miss out on it, too.
But you know his friends. You know his character. You trust him.
So you jumped.
“She’s so cute when she’s embarrassed,” Denki chuckles, propping his chin in his hand. He’s got his other palm on Jirou’s thigh under the table. In fact, everybody’s starting to get closer, now that dinner’s been taken care of.
“Let me kiss her. Please, Kiri?” Mina leans over again, resting a palm on Kiri’s lap as she bats her eyelashes at you.
“You’re gonna have to ask her yourself, Mina,” Kiri chides. He folds his arms behind his head and leans back in his chair, ready for the show.
Mina purrs your name again, smiling indulgently as she leans a little closer.
“Can I kiss you? Pretty please?”
You’re suddenly bashful, biting your lip. But you want this. You do.
“Sure. Okay.”
You release your lip from your teeth as Mina leans forward. Her lips are soft and so plush, and she’s a careful kisser. Out your right ear, you can hear Kirishima give a little sigh as he watches, and he rests a hand on each of your backs, rubbing soothingly.
“Come on,” Bakugou grunts as the two of you break apart. His chair scrapes harshly across the tile when he stands. “Get your asses to the living room before shit gets messy.”
Before you know it, you’re in a tangle of bare and sweaty limbs. You started out between Bakugou and Kirishima- the two boys you’re most familiar with. You’re stroking both of their hard cocks while they kiss each other, then you, then each other again. All the while, in the background, Mina, Sero, Denki and Jirou are stripping each other down, sprawling across the couch, letting a symphony of moans and sighs drift across the living room to your ears.
Before long, you’re pulled backwards into Denki’s lap as he fucks diligently up into you. Your pussy’s sloppy, slick from Mina’s tongue, and she’s perched right next to you, riding your boyfriend’s cock as the two of you let your hands drift.
You can see that Kirishima has a tight bond with all of these people. But you feel no jealousy towards them. If he can be so closely bonded with so many from his past, then why not you, too? Every time he catches your eye, no matter how many bodies there are between the two of you, he shoots you a loving little wink.
And at the end of the night, it’s you who’s going to be falling asleep beside him.
At some point, Bakugou pulls up a nearby chair, stroking himself while he watches the six of you drive each other to the edge, over and over and over again. By the time you’re all finished, you’re certain at least two dozen orgasms have passed between the lot of you.
And it shows. You’re exhausted.
After sharing such intimacy, you’re reluctant to break from one another. But inevitably you do, separating into your respective beds for the night. As you get ready for bed Kirishima’s full of energy.
“Holy shit, babe,” he raves, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you in for a tight kiss. “That was so fucking hot. You did such a good job, god damn.” He cups your jaw between both his hands and pulls your gaze to his.
He looks down at you with the Milky Way lit up in his eyes, fathomless love all for you.
“You looked so perfect,” he confesses, kissing your forehead, “in the middle a’ all my friends like that.”
You fall into bed together, feeling sore and spent and very loved, and sleep better than you have in weeks.
The next morning, in a haze of woodsy dawn, everybody fights over what to make for breakfast.
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