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oofmattel-blog · 5 years

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doll; trixya

PART ONE PART TWO

"Hey, Tracy! Get your ass over here!" Katya turned her head over to a group of girls standing by a row of lockers. "Tracy? Who the hell is that?" Trixie chuckled and looked over at the girls, walking over with Katya following behind her. "That would be me, I'm Tracy." oh? Katya thought. She took a good look at the girls in front of her a decided that Trixie and her friends were definitely an interesting bunch.

"Trixie, who's this?" A short girl with black pigtails asked. Trixie smiled and gestured to Katya, "girls, this is Katya. Katya, this is Dela, Kameron, Adore, and Kim." They all chatted for a bit, cracking jokes with Katya while Trixie smiled at her, happy the dark-haired girl was getting along with her friends.

Trixie didn't want to admit it, especially because it was so silly, but she was already fond of Katya, like, really fond of Katya. She knows it's stupid of her to fall for a girl she's only known for two hours, but at the same time, she felt like it wasn't stupid at all. Who wouldn't fall for her? Katya is gorgeous. Her petite but toned frame was beautiful, and her eyes and smile were the most amazing things she has ever seen...

Katya also gave her a chance, which was a very rare thing. Trixie was the most stereotypical nerd; good grades, 'dorky' clothes, very little friends... You get it. Well, she had friends. Quite a few, actually. She used to be best friends with the mean girls of the school, Violet Chachki and Pearl Liaison. That was at least until they outed her as a 'dyke.' Everyone forgot about Trixie Mattel the 'boy magnet' after that. People ignored her, called her names, threatened her if she was even within a three-foot range of a girl. So she resorted to being friends with the one thing she loved the most, math, and that is how she went from 'boy magnet' to 'dyke-nerd.'

"Trixie, are you okay?" Katya asked, looking over at her with concern. Trixie quickly realized that she had spaced out and shook her head, clearing her thoughts. She replaced the frown on her face with a smile and nodded, "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's hurry up and get to lunch before all of the good seats are gone." Trixie grabbed Katya's hand, which was warm and soft, and led her to the cafeteria.

le tiny time skip brought to you by Maybelline.

Trixie and Katya were sat in the corner of the cafeteria with Dela and Kim, thankful that lunchtime had finally arrived. Nothing was better than having 30 minutes to just do absolutely nothing. The girls were having a conversation about how much plastic surgery they thought Alaska, one of their friends a grade below them, had probably gotten over the summer until the wicked bitches of the west came over.

"Hey, dykes. These are our seats, so kindly fucking move." Violet said, her voice laced with malice. "Violet, leave us the hell alone." Trixie rested her forehead in her palm, shaking her head. Violet looked over at the pink haired girl, smirking. "Well, well, if it isn't the queen of dykes herself." Katya looked at Violet and Pearl, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Dykes? She thought.

"That's a pretty dress, it would be terrible if something happened to it... Oops." Violet said as Pearl took Trixie's lunch and dumped it onto her lap, staining her dress. Trixie just sat there and looked at them with tears threatening to spill out of her eyes while the rest of the girls looked ready to fight, especially Katya. Who the fuck were these girls?

The two walked away before the girls could actually do anything and turned their attention back to Trixie, who was sitting in silence with tears flowing down her face. "Let's go guys." She said in barely a whisper, scraping her lunch off of her dress and back into its container and throwing it in the trash. Katya quickly ran up to her, grabbing her hand.

"Are you okay, kukla?" Trixie just shook her head, squeezing Katya's hand. "I just wanna go home." She picked up her backpack, letting go of Katya's hand and walking out of the cafeteria, leaving the girls behind. Katya turned around, facing Dela and Kim, "What the fuck just happened?" Dela sighed and proceeded to tell Katya the whole story from start to finish. By the end, her blood was boiling and she wanted nothing more than to find Trixie and hug her, letting her know that everything was okay.

Katya was once in a similar situation, it turns out some friends just aren't trustworthy and 'gay' and 'slut' were written on her locker in permanent marker. That's when her mother ultimately decided to move to America from Russia, to give her daughter a fresh start. She knows how Trixie feels, and it sucks. It sucks to feel so small in a big world, afraid to walk down a hallway and be called names. But Katya was going to make sure that didn't happen anymore, even if it killed her.

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Haha, jk here’s part two :)

#trixie mattel #katya zamolodchikova #trixya #rpdr

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acehotel · 6 years

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Spill’t: Brita Filter With Peter Dunn

Brita Filter, meteoric drag queen and performer, is known for her witty, sharp-as-knives humor, extravagant aesthetics and will one day take over the world. Today Brita sits down with NYC nightlife polymath Peter Dunn, who spills the tea on his cult webseries Gays, having a heart attack before turning 30 and practical self-care advice (food, water and sleep) in the latest edition of Spill’t.

Brita Filter: Hello, and welcome. I'm sitting here with my friend Peter.

Peter Dunn: Hey!

BF: So, we met when we were both judging a competition together called So You Think You Can Belt, which was at The West End on the Upper West Side.

PD: Still going 15 seasons later.

BF: How long have you been with So You Think You Can Belt?

PD: I was originally brought on as a guest judge because Natalie Weiss knew that I worked in reality TV and competition shows like X Factor, so she suggested that I guest judge. That was season seven, and then I took over the show season eight.

BF: Now I'm getting ahead of myself — let’s go back to the very beginning. Back when...

PD: ...back when I was a little black girl in the Brewster projects?

BF: Exactly, when you were thrust into the world. Where you from?

PD: I was born and raised in New York City on the Upper West Side.

BF: Oh, I didn't know that.

PD: Yeah, and I was a child actor. I started modeling when I was six months old, and started acting when I was two years old. I pretty much acted consistently until I was like 13 — film, TV, commercials, lots of theater, The Metropolitan Opera Children's Chorus. Then I was hit by a yellow cab — which I got no fucking money for — and that kind of halted my pursuit of acting. I've always been interested in directing and writing stuff since I was a little, little boy, so I started focusing more on that.

When it came time for college, I realized I wanted something with more technique than theater or musical theater, so I double-majored in Film Production and Dramatic Writing at Emerson College in Boston. After college, I moved to Europe for two and a half years, mostly between London and Dublin, and now I'm back in New York trying to figure out what the hell I'm doing.

BF: I mean, you've done some pretty incredible things. You worked for X Factor?

PD: Yes, so after I moved back to the US, somehow I started working (I don't really remember how) in reality TV. I did associate producer work for the US X Factor, then consultant work for American Idol and America's Got Talent.

I was doing that, and also bartending part-time — just working all the time and living out of suitcases and burning myself out completely. I realized that working on these shows was all about making someone else's dream come true —which is amazing — had taken me completely away from writing. Eventually, I was like, "what about PD's dreams? I'm not even writing anymore." I used to write the first thing when I woke up every day. I hadn't done that in three years.

vimeo

BF: Is that when the Gays web series happened?

PD: Yes

BF: How did that become a thing?

PD: I had originally wanted to start working on a feature film script for a horror movie I’ll hopefully still write at some point. I was like, "Eh, I haven't written in years. I feel like I need to really get my gears going again." This was when Girls had just come out. I was like, "Okay, I'm going to give myself a writing exercise. I'm going to write a pilot for a gay version of Girls." I wrote the pilot in my bathtub, which is my favorite place to write, and I sent it to my best friend in the world, and she was like, "This is actually pretty good. You should keep working on this."

Over the next two months, I wrote the first season and was shopping it around a little bit, but when you're a writer with no actual credits to your name, you're not going to get much money for your project, and then they'll just do whatever they want to it. At that point, 240 pages later, I was invested in the characters, and I wanted it to be the way I wanted it to be.

BF: Yeah, of course.

PD: So we started a Kickstarter to try and raise $12,000 to shoot the pilot episode. We were going to produce the pilot episode ourselves, do everything ourselves, blah blah blah. The Kickstarter failed, and when Kickstarter fails it means you don't get any of the money. I was honestly mortified because I was like, "My ego cannot take this hit. I finally talked about this project and put it out there. I can't be the person that failed, never got to actually do what they said they were going to do." So I went the old school route. I went to a lot of LGBT fundraisers and benefits and networked; I was just talking to people with money and handing out business cards and being like, "Hey, I have this thing if you want to read it, if you have any interest in investing a little bit of money in it, give it a read." Then we did an Indiegogo also. We somehow ended up raising enough to not only shoot the first episode, but to shoot the entire first season.

So we did that, and it was one of the most incredible and exhausting experiences of my life, because we were shooting 60 to 70 hour weeks. On top of that, I'd written it, was co-directing it, producing it, starring in it, which wasn't originally my goal — and just doing a lot. We had a budget, but it still wasn't a huge budget, especially for making things up to my standard.

I dressed all the characters myself, ordered all those clothes online and returned them, and I would cook for the cast and crew half the time, just because it was cheaper. So it was just a very, very, very, very, very exhausting experience, but incredible. I don't think I'll ever owe people more in my life than the cast and crew of that show. They gave me everything in them for a year and a half, basically.

Our goal was to release it the day of the next season premiere of Girls, which was January 2014. Oh, my God. And then, of course, Looking ended up premiering that same night too, so all of our initial reviews were comparing Gays to Looking, and the amazing thing is most of the reviews said that Gays was better, which I appreciated and kind of agreed with. We released the first season through the course of a year, and after that, I was kind of burnt out; I said I was going to take a three to six-month break then get back to working on season two. That was three years ago.

We still get messages from people being like, "Is it ever coming back?" So it's cool to know that the interest is still there.

BF: Oh yeah, there’s a definite fan base.

PD: Three years later! My goal is to get back to it this summer, hopefully, along with getting my summer body.

BF: Me too, girl.

PD: That people will still care about the characters and the storylines and that it's still four, five main characters that are relevant to the community and that have important stories to tell.

BF: I think that's so important. It's been a while since I watched it, but I know that when I did see it, there was such strong representation — like, I knew these people in my life, but I've never seen it on-screen. That’s what's so lovely about it.

PD: Yeah. I really did feel like it was stories that weren't being told for our community that were important to tell. And the really cool thing about releasing online is that anyone who has access to the internet can watch this. There's this really cool thing where you can see all your statistics, and it shows you a picture of the world and all of the countries will either be gray or blue. If they're blue, it means that your content has been clicked on and viewed and played in that country. And, literally, Gays has been watched in 140 of 144 countries.

BF: Oh, shit. 140?

PD: It's insane. And seeing that map, and seeing all of these blue places, and it's like... Malaysia, it's been viewed four times. And places like Russia and a lot of Africa, that possibly this gave this little gay teen some form of escape to tell them that who they are is okay, and that they matter.

BF: That's incredible. Growing up in the city, when did you come out?

PD: I feel like I was basically always out. Like, ever since I was like four or five, I was always just like, "I like boys." And I think everyone in my family thought it was a phase, but I was always just like, "I like boys." I rode the bi-train for a bit, "I like everyone, that's okay, I'm me, I just love to love people." Growing up having worked in theater, I was surrounded by a lot of gay men, which was very fortunate for me...in many ways.

But I was also surrounded by positive gay role models, so even though I was still teased a lot in school, it didn't effect me as much as it can effects other people, I think, because I knew I was fine. I guess I officially, officially came out in high school, but I never really had to have the coming out...

BF: So you have kind of always been out, and your family was fine with it?

PD: For the most part, yes. I mean, I still think that they would have preferred that I was not gay. I think the males in my family had more of a problem with it than the females in my family.

BF: Naturally.

PD: And my mom was fine with it. I think my mom was just worried about my overall well-being and how I was going to be treated for being gay more than actually having a problem with me being gay, if that makes sense.

There are things that she's had to adjust to a little bit, but compared to a lot of stories from other people I know, I would say it was a piece of cake for me, honestly. I was very lucky in that way. I was always just, if someone isn't going to love me for me, then I just don't really need that person in my life. I’ve cut out certain family members for that, but it's still never really been something that I've regretted. I can find people that will love me and that can replace you easily. That's what chosen family is for, you know?

BF: Did your family see Gays?

PD: Yes, and that was...weird.

BF: I feel like saying you’re gay is one thing, but actually doing it can be something else entirely, especially when your identity is so involved in your art.

PD: Absolutely.

BF: Being a drag queen, I felt like I had to come out to my mother again. I was like, "Oh yeah, not only do I sleep with men, but I'm going to be a woman at night too," and she was like, "Oh, my God. What is this? What are you doing?"

PD: "I don't understand what's happeningI"

BF: "You're doing what?" I mean, she gets it now, but...

PD: It took a while. I just keep finding that becoming an adult, or being an adult — it’s such a weird fucking experience. Being a kid was much easier. I told my mom all about the show and she was there through the process. She cooked sometimes for the cast and crew and stuff.

She was on the show. She played my mom on it. She was only in a couple scenes. I knew that I was going to be uncomfortable watching some of it with her because a lot of it is autobiographical. I was dreading the sex scene.

BF: Yes, of course. Of course.

PD: Even seeing that at our premiere party was 30 of the worst seconds of my entire life. She wasn't there, but we had that episode premiere party at Therapy and it was fucking packed with some people that I've known since I was a child. And I'm getting, like, fucking pounded out on a ginormous screen in front of a room full of people that do and don't know me. So my mom came to the first two premiere parties. She saw the first four episodes, because mainly she was like, "I need to see myself."

I do know that she didn't finish watching the show by herself. There have been times where I've brought that up and she has expressed disdain for some of the content of the show, and some of the things that I was doing. So she never finished the season because of that, which kind of makes me sad, but I understand.

BF: My mom doesn't like when I'm...well, anything but pure. She doesn't like when I'm dirty. With my act, she’s like, "Do you really have to talk about pussy?"

PD: I was just about to say, "So the pussy number is not her favorite?"

BF: Exactly. But I get it. I mean, I'm glad that she watched a little bit of it, to understand.

PD: I will say I wish she had finished it, only because the stuff I'm most proud of is the second half of the season, because that's when i feel like the show got to the really serious stuff.

BF: The meat of the season. I noticed that when you were talking about creating Gays, that it was not only the most incredible, but the most taxing experience of your entire life. I mean, personally, I have been doing so much. I've basically been slaying the game, artistically.

PD: Seriously.

BF: In the drag scene, trying to one-up myself, to keep doing bigger and bigger projects. But while my art was thriving, I kind of forgot about myself, taking care of me...and I'm still trying to figure it out.

PD: I feel like I'm always reminding you, "Remember, don't forget about Brita Filter."

BF: Right? Are there certain things you do to combat that? I think the thing that we have in common is that we push and push ourselves, and when I do that I’m all of sudden completely depleted.

PD: It's putting out so much energy and commitment, and thinking that you have 250% to put out there for eternity. None of us are invincible, you know what I mean?

BF: Yeah.

PD: I've learned to try to be my own therapist sometimes — to really analyze some of the habits and patterns I repeat. I realize I have this cycle no matter what I'm putting my energy into — X Factor, Gays, producing shows and stuff in the city — I just honestly go past what my actual limit is, and my body has to remind me. I mean, I literally had a heart attack before I was 30.

BF: I remember when that happened. That was scary.

PD: That was a little right after I met you, actually. Three years in June. June 23 was when that happened, 2015. That came from just me overexerting myself and not making myself a priority at all. Forgetting to do the basic things you need to survive, like eat food and drink water and sleep. Those basic things that humans need to survive. I was just like, "Who needs water? Why would I eat? I'm not hungry right now. I don't have time for that."

That was one of the biggest wake up calls that I've ever had, clearly. It's like, "oh, let's just almost die," you know? So now I try and force myself to just stop sometimes. If I feel like I need a break, then that means I need a break. My peak so far was producing four to eight shows a month. Each show was already taking all of me, and I was doubling them and tripling them and quadrupling them up, to the point where I didn't do anything except produce shows and answer emails. My brain was constantly in overdrive and there was no actual relaxation. My brain was always over-processing 20 million fucking things.

So that, it was like: “Okay. We know where this can lead from the past, so let's take a step away from this, give yourself a little bit of time for a couple months, and then you'll know when you're ready to step back into that creative seat.” And I think, especially as artists, we kind of feel like we always have to be doing something.

We're like, "How am I going to get to whatever point I want to get to unless I'm always working on something?" But taking time for yourself and resting your creative mind can be just as important.

BF: So important. You have to live life in order for things to come. So I'm proud of you. You're doing a great job.

PD: Aww.

BF: Lately, I've been taking a walk by the river, even if it's for just 20 minutes.

PD: It's crazy what that does to your mind.

BF: Just stepping away from the fucking concrete and all these damn buildings and people.

PD: And all these damn people. Especially working in nightlife, in combination with being an artist, you're just constantly having to be on.

BF: 100%. Now you have so many other things going on. What are you mainly focusing on right now?

PD: I'm back to producing a good amount of shows at The West End and also at The Cutting Room.

BF: That's a great venue. The Cutting Room.

PD: Oh, my God. It's fucking gorgeous. Yeah, my most recent show there, I was working with two amazing singer-songwriters, Selda Sahin and Derek Gregor, and we got over 200 people there. It was a pretty incredible show.

I'm also very grateful for The West End for bringing me the perfect opportunity to use the kind of stuff that I was doing on X Factor in a hands-on, intimate way — to help artists thrive, and give them a safe space to create and feel genuinely supported. So many times in this city, you don't have real support. You don't have people who are coming out to your shows and who are telling you "I believe in you and I want to help you in any way that I can."

Also, I'm planning on starting work on Gays Season 2 soon, and thinking about exploring the music A&R world, and also working on my own music again. I had stopped songwriting when I was a teenager probably, but since getting more involved in live music, I was like, "I know I can write. Why not?” I was dealing with a experience with a boy and I realized literally the only possible way for me to get closure from this situation is music.

So I wrote my first song in 15 years and sent it to a friend, the amazing Morgan Riley, who helped me put music under it. I'm writing music more and maybe if I get the balls to do it, I’ll start putting that out into the world too.

BF: Planting seeds. I feel like, as an artist, once you stop learning, it's time to give up.

PD: And once you think you know everything, it's definitely time to give up.

BF: The reason why I love being a drag queen is because I love our community so much. I love the LGBTQ community, I love giving people a safe space where they can come and they can forget about everything. What would you like to see the city’s LGBTQ community, or nightlife in general, move toward?

PD: I am still such a huge fan of the community, and of nightlife, and of the LGBTQ community, but I do wish that new connections were made more genuinely out and about. That was always my favorite thing about going out when I was younger, just meeting people and never knowing where the night was going. I was one of those people that would be going to 10 different places, picking up strays along the way, being like, "You're a good time, come with me and my friends."

There was a genuine kind of spirit in the air. We're going out and we're going to make new connections and we're going to be a big old happy family — I miss that a little bit. If you go out, just meet one new person. You know? If you see somebody who's out by themselves, don't be a creep, but just smile and say "hi" to them. I always think it's really important to acknowledge people. I feel like people walk around a lot feeling like they're invisible in many ways, and a really simple "hello" or a smile can make a difference in someone's entire day.

BF: That's right. Smile at a stranger. I'm actually really glad that you said that because I'm really trying to take my drag to the next level — to be a New York City —

PD: Icon, bitch.

BF: Icon.

PD: Legendary.

BF: You know, well, she's moving on up. The reason why I started is because I wanted to create those safe spaces for people, and to make people just laugh and get away. To create moments. You can never recreate that.

PD: Some of my best memories with some of my best friends — some who aren't even with us anymore — had so much to do with the genuine fun of feeling like you didn't want to be anywhere else but where you were, with the people you were with. I kind of feel like that joy is just not as available as much as it was before.

BF: Yeah, I agree. Well, bitch, Imma change that shit.

PD: Change it, girl.

#spill't #brita filter #New York #Yes #Ace Hotel #Peter Dunn #Gays: The Series #nyc #ace new york #interview #drag

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kyrakat20 · 3 years

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ENGL 102 Cultural Object Project: Lady Gaga

Creative. Singer. Dancer. Wild child. Fashion Crackhead. Unique. LBGTQ+ community. When looking at these words, who do you think best fits this mold? In other words, who fits this mold better than Lady Gaga? Lady Gaga has played a significant part in the music and fashion industry from her rise to fame to her present career. She has done this by breaking the mold of the generic music industry. The start of her career shocked viewers but kept them glued to the screen to see what she will do next. Lady Gaga, or Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, dropped out of New York University's Tisch School of the Arts to pursue her career in music. Before actually reaching to fame, she was rejected by Def Jam Recordings by cancellation of her contract as a singer/ songwriter, but they soon learned that they had made a huge mistake when soon after, she released “Just Dance” and “Poker Face”. It was “R&B singer Akon [who] discovered Gaga while she was performing a burlesque show that she created, called "Lady Gaga and the Starlight Revue." Impressed, Akon signed the performer to his label under the Interscope umbrella, Kon Live” (source). From the start of the “Poker Face” era to her “Born This Way”, Lady Gaga has played a big part in shocking cultural expectations when it comes to music. Her music career can be defined as sexy, risque, and unique. It made conservative families shake in their boots in fear of what their children were seeing through her music videos, TV show appearances, and lyrics. Gaga is a cultural object when being referred to fashion choices and huge influence on the LBGTQ+ community, when at the time, was still very taboo and was not being talked/ culturally accepted like it is today. So how has Lady Gaga influenced the American music industry and the acceptance of others?

When I ponder about Gaga’s fashion choices, my first thought goes to the exotic choices of fashion she has makes within music videos and red carpet/ show appearances such as the bloody scene from the VMAs, the meat dress, and unique choices in makeup and clothing in her “Telephone” music video. Gaga is a cultural object when it comes to the shock factor through her choices of her appearances and involvement with the gay community.

In 2009, I remember sitting in the living room with my family ready to watch the VMAs. For being so young, I was a big fan of Gaga and was excited to see the performance of “Paparazzi”, a song that I knew all the words to. As the red curtain began to rise, Gaga was pictured laying on the ground with her background dancers all around her, everyone in white. I remember my family members making smart remarks as to why she was dressed that specific way, as they were not Gaga fans. The remarks got even more intense when Gaga was then given a crutch to walk on. As a fan, I knew this was referencing the music video. Then it happened. Blood. Blood streaming down the white costume of hers. Singing as if she was in pain. Then not to forget to mention, her background dancers attaching her to a rope and hanging her from the ceiling! Not only did this shock my own household, but the gasps that gaped from the audience at the VMAs at the sight of the fake blood dripping from her body was insane. At 23 years old, Lady Gaga changed VMA performances. She turned classic flashy VMA performances into art. There was no way to top this type of performance and left people still talking about it today. Not only was she just starting out her career when this was performed, but she made herself memorable to people of America.

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Another way Gaga has changed fashion expectations for celebrities, whether that's in performances or music videos, is through her red carpet appearance in the meat dress. This dress was not only iconic because it had never been done before, but because it caused and stirred a lot of controversy with PETA. This dress was worn at the 2010 VMAs where she had a record making 13 nominations. It was made out of pure raw beef. It was shocking to everyone. It was shocking to Gaga fans, because she is vegan and wearing a meat dress, but it was also shocking to people such as Peta who are animal rights activists. Although Gaga wanted the shock value, she had no intention to offend anyone. As she states in an interview with Ellen Degenerous in a Billboard article, “‘As you know, I'm the most judgment-free human being on the Earth. It has many interpretations, but for me this evening it's [saying], 'If we don't stand up for what we believe in, if we don't fight for our rights, pretty soon we're going to have as much rights as the meat on our bones'" (source). The dress was actually a protest to the “don't ask, don't tell” policy which protects gay people in the military. As you can tell, Gaga has a very creative approach on how she likes to advocate. She wants people to have a shock factor then reveals the true meaning.

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Gaga’s fashion choices in her music video, “Telephone” featuring Beyonce, changed how music videos represent the artist. In this music video, Gaga has multiple outfit changes. These outfits include unique, never seen before sexy outfits that include chains as body decor, burning cigarette glasses, diet coke can rollers, caution tape outfit, telephone headpieces, American flag two piece and lastly, a cheetah print one piece. These outfit changes represent different parts of the story line depicted in the 9 minute music video. The music video depicts Gaga going into jail for killing her lover (as shown in the “Paparazzi” music video) and shows her and Beyonce killing diners with rat poison. This music video is different from others because of the constant story line being represented through each scene and the lyrics themselves. Her music videos made others want to have a deeper meaning behind theirs. This changed how artists wanted to represent their music and wanting to keep their fans engaged. Gaga made viewers not only want to listen to the song but also watch the video which made other artists want to do the same.

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Gaga is a huge advocate for the lgbtq + community and has represented them throughout her entire career. She has done this by creating music surrounding accepting themselves as well as representing them through concerts and at the national equality March.

“Born This Way” can be considered “the new gay anthem” because it caters to her LBGTQ+ fan base. The song is about accepting yourself for who you are, no matter what you do or believe in. This song had brought hope to her fans who were struggling to be themselves. It seemed like it was the only way for them to express or put into words on how they should feel about themselves. This song also broke down walls in the music industry by talking about being gay. During this time period, it was not accepted to speak freely about your sexuality and it wasn’t until the release of this song that made it easy for everyone, even those who are heterosexual. This is not the only Gaga has recognized her LBGTQ+ fan base in her career.

Gaga is a huge activist for equal rights between men and women when it comes to who they can love. In 2012, Gaga was warned that she may be arrested in Moscow, Russia if she were to speak about gay rights at her concert. With that being said, Gaga showed no fear to Russia. On stage, she announced to her audience about the warning that was taken as a threat, and preceded to tell Moscow to arrest her. She put her wrist together in the air, ready to be arrested because she was willing to take away her freedom so that her fans could have theirs. This act of rebellion in the country of Russia displayed her loyalty to her fans. She was willing to risk her career for the support of her fans, like no other artist has done.

Gaga has also represented her fans at the National Equality March. This March took place on October 11th 2009. This March was constructed because they wanted President Obama to keep his promise of protecting LGBTQ+ people safe in the military. This follows the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy. Gaga spoke at this March to represent her gay fan base. As found in a Prefix article, “Gaga claimed she would continue to push President Obama to make changes to the law, and said she had “the most beautiful gay fans in the world” to loud cheers from the audience” (source). Speaking and performing at this March represented the loyalty she has for her fans, making her a cultural object for the gay community.

(Picture Source)

After exploring some of Lady Gaga's iconic moments in her music career, It can be inferred that she is a cultural object when it comes to America's music and gay communities. She has influenced other artists as well as society to be more open-minded when it comes to judging each other and being creative when making/ producing music and fashion statements.

0 notes

iammarylastar · 7 years

Photo

The Exception. 6. Epilogue

They had 4 kids, Britany their little Bree, Luke, Adam and Chris. Life took the third back to God just a week after he was born.

They cried, they mourned, weeks turning into months and Chris came unexpectedly, bringing happiness and joy back to the family.

Stefan stroked the old picture with his thumb.

Mieke and he were standing on the Sydney Bridge, Bree in his arms, Luke in his mother’s. Adam was still growing inside his mother’s womb, little angel who had been ghosting his memories for more than 50 years.

Cora, as she was used to on each Sunday, took this picture in May 1945, Adam was born in June, about two months early.

They were celebrating the end of that damn war, the World sighed in relief but there was so many wounds to heal.

Europe, Russia had been devastated; Germany and Japan would pay for their faults for decades. Mankind would recover, maybe, and have its dignity and faith in humanity bringing goodness back.

Chris was missing in the black and white picture. He came the year after Adam died.

Stefan felt a stab in his heart at the reminder. Mieke and he had been more devastated by his lost than any city blown up to ruins by bombings.

They cried again and again, fighting hell to get up in the morning, trying their best to keep up a smile on their tired faces and raise their other children. Mieke had acted like a ghost for months and all his attempts to cheer her up failed miserably. She closed her heart and her thighs to him, slowly fading away.

One night where she was silently crying, he took her in his arms and rocked her gently; his chin on the top of her head, whispering soothing love words in her ear as she finally let it go.

She cried and hit her fists on his chest, biting his shoulder to keep herself from screaming too loudly. She dug her nails deep into his skin, leaving marks, and then slapped his face with all the force she had left.

Like it was his fault. Like it could be someone’s fault.

He let her straddle him as she was beating him up, until she crashed down on him, exhausted and panting. He wrapped his wife close to his chest and sat up; combed back her hair damped with tears, stroked lightly her perfect lines, then brushed her lower lips, red from being bitten to blood.

“Mieke, I love you.”

He just said.

She stared at him for a solid minute, reading deep sadness in his eyes, along with hope. And love.

She leant over to brush her lips on his, and then pushed him back to the mattress. Grabbing the hem of her nightdress, she rolled the cloth up her thighs and lifted her ass up to line up with his shaft. Her fingers grasped his pec, and she sighed as she slid down his cock, her eyes never leaving his.

She made love to him, the same way she always had, in their other life.

Chris came 9 full months later. They welcomed this strong young boy, healthy and bald. Happiness filled their house again, along with the cries of the newborn, hungry both for life and milk.

The Kaiser was right; they fought for human rights and equality on each occasion.

They fought for the rights of the natives, and drove to Canberra that day in 2008, when Kevin Rudd apologized officially for the shameful way Australia treated Aboriginals and the stolen generation.

They fought for the equality between men and women, between all human beings, whatever colour their skin was.

They fought against the ‘gay panic defense’ law, which allowed people to justify a murder in the name of their fear of homosexuals.

More recently they fought for gay and lesbian’s rights, hoping for them to be allowed to get married one day. Love was love after all.

They were involved in several causes and proud to teach this to their children. Goodness and justice as a legacy.

And Australia was on its way to the fairness she claimed.

Mieke died the year before, in her mid 70s. Breast cancer. At least, he had all his family back home for the funerals.

Stefan let a sob out, it still hurt so much. They had a good life together; they could tell they knew love and happiness. Which he wished to all his children and grand children.

Brittany married twice and gave birth to three girls. She had to follow her latest husband to Perth and he missed his little Bree so much. She called her mom and dad every day by phone or Skype.

Handwritten letters and much awaited mails were bygone days. He wondered how things would have gone if Mieke had been able to call the Kaiser with her IPhone and get an answer by fax or e-mail within an hour.

Anyway, the two or three times a year he had them home was never enough to enjoy his beloved daughter and her team, to which he loved telling stories of their mother as a child. She still thought she was born here in Sydney, as written and stamped on her certificate of birth.

Luke had always been a lonely and introvert child, only fully alive when talking about ocean and what’s beyond. He was eager to travel the world, dreaming of being a sailor or working on an oil rig. He loved staying all by himself and told his parents he didn’t feel like he belonged there. He was only 6.

Mieke had cried many rivers, blaming herself not to have been able to take care for him after Adam died, foreseeing their son leaving their household at an early age, which she wouldn’t survive as she repeated again and again.

She survived though, when he came home at 17, hired as a steward on a yacht, bound for a cruise to French Polynesia. He was over excited, about to ‘live the dream’ , jumping up and down through the house, packing his stuff and shoving them in a big duffle bag.

Pulling his crying mother in a huge hug, he begged, subtly delivering the speech he had prepared for the occasion.

“Mom, this is what makes me happy. I promise I’ll send you postcards from every single place I land on. Mom, please, let me go.”

Stefan looked at the wall where thousands of cards were pinned. There was no country in the world Luke had not put a foot on.

He tried to settle down in Sydney when he was 30, even took a wife and had a son. But this was not a life for him. He had stayed at bay for 4 years but the ocean screamed his name so loud every fucking day and he had to struggle too hard not to pack and leave within the second.

Chris had always been his favorite. Not really his fav but they always had been very close. Thinking alike, same sense of humour, same skills in teasing and winking, same no skill in taking pics. Mieke was use to mocking them, saying they couldn’t take a good picture to save their lives.

Chris married a blonde beauty who brought two children into the world. A girl and boy.

They named their first born Bree, after Chris big sister. And the boy was weirdly called Jai, a name he had never heard before, Stephen as a middle name. Like his beloved grand pa.

Bree had dark eyes and hair, she reminded him of Mieke so much. Smart and beautiful, she wanted to become a teacher like her mother. She was surprisingly -not that much- very skilled in foreign languages.

The boy was the perfect Aussie bloke, blonde curls, amazing blue eyes, sporty, cheeky and kind of a womanizer. He had inherited his frame but looked so much like his mother. Pretty allergic to each foreign language that was not deep accented australian.

He often paid a visit to his grand parents, shamelessly skipping school to sip a beer with his grand pa, chitchatting about girls, life and acting. It had always been his passion, playing someone else, telling stories.

He was chasing the gig, dreaming of a career in Hollywood.

Stefan chuckled. He and Mieke had been very talented at it. Being someone else, telling stories, lying about their roots.

Mieke made him swear to never ever speak about their former life. Too dangerous. The shadow of what happened when they arrived in Sydney haunted her brain and she told him she’d rather kill him than relive those bad times.

Their deepest secret had laid under a floorboard since they moved in this house, after Luke was born. Sealed like their lips.

The ID they made whilst in London before leaving, Nietzsche’s 'Beyond good and evil’ he still remembered Mieke’s note and the first page by heart. The letter the Kaiser wrote to save Stefan’s life. The official court decision that made him a free man. Their wedding pic. Few pics of them taking pose with Cora or Marvin before they had to cut ties with them. To keep the secret.

It was a miracle that none of their children or grandchildren ever asked about their roots, their story, where Mieke’s name came from or why she kept calling his husband Stefan instead of Stephen.

The rules of family secrets. No questions.

At some point, he would have to tell his family the truth.

Stefan Brandt and Mieke De Jong.

The Kaiser Willem II. The spy, the murders, the war, the run. The real story of Bree’s birth. Her real name. The reason she named all her dolls Cora. The real reason why Luke lived for sailing. Running from Oz to find where he was really from.

The reason why Jai wanted to be somebody else for a living.

The real story of the Courtney’s.

@captstefanbrandt @kenzieam @beautifulramblingbrains @pathybo @beltz2016 @bookwarm85 @jaicourtneyseyes @oddsnendsfanfics @frecklefaceb @writingismyhappytime @badassbaker @anditcametopass @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995

@tigpooh67 @societalfailure @singingpeople

#the exception #jai courtney #epilogue

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artificialqueens · 7 years

Text

now there's green light in my eyes ch. 1

author ladyalix

cw / alcohol

ship: trixya

1920s/Great Gatsby AU for Trixya! Trixie is a Milwaukee girl visiting her cousin Pearl in New York, Katya is a Russian refugee in the bootlegging business, murder and lovers and speakeasies and general 1920s New York fun ensue! Trixie, Katya, Kennedy, and Pearl are cis girls, Max is a cis man, and Violet is a gay/genderfluid Italian gangster who does drag!

more on ao3 @ladyalix

I know what the gangsters think of me. I can converse with them as easily in their native Italian as in English, I smoke and drink like one of them. My clothing is cut low to lead them into business deals, coerce them into thinking I actually give a damn about them personally. They like to believe it, and so they do.

But these men, I do not find them attractive. No, the one who makes my heart race is someone entirely different.

___

Trixie Mattel’s summer in New York was hard to run by her mother. It was safer in Wisconsin, Mamma had argued. The city wasn’t proper for a nice girl like Trixie, only nineteen, chaste and well-mannered - she belonged in a small town, helping Mamma run her dress shop, biding the days until she married whatever good-natured man came along first. Ever since Papa had died when she was eleven, Trixie had spent her summers working. It wasn’t easy without a man in the house, but they made do with what they had. Trixie had stopped asking for new clothing long ago, learned to pretend not to be hungry on the days when there wasn’t money for food. When Mamma took in sewing and laundry and cleaned rich ladies’ houses Trixie came along and helped; the most important thing, though, Mamma always said, was that she did not lose her dignity and class. Mamma grew up in New York; her sister’s daughter Pearl, who was five years older than Trixie, lived there now. Mamma had left it all behind to marry Trixie’s father, a love story she told with wistful eyes and sighs whenever Trixie could coax it out of her.

“They didn’t want me marrying him,” she said. “He was an Indian from Wisconsin and I was a socialite from New York. It was quite the scandal back in the day - in all the papers, you know. It was unthinkable. But when you love someone, sometimes boundaries that stark cease to exist. When you love someone everything falls into place.”

And so Trixie and her mother, cut off from any inheritance, still acted like socialites even when there was nothing to eat, when there was no coal in the fireplace, when Trixie had to drop out of school for a year and take in mending. She held onto that secret knowledge, that she came from New York and had the manners and poise and dignity to show for it, like it was a treasure. A pearl, like her cousin’s name. She’d never met Pearl, but the two had corresponded for many years of Trixie’s childhood. Trixie could tell she was a pretty girl even in black and white - lithe and elfin with big eyes. Pearl often wrote of lavish parties and beach holidays and trips abroad; she married an Englishman named Max Malanaphy last year. Trixie idolized her. And this year, the summer she would be turning nineteen, Pearl had finally sent her the letter Trixie had been waiting for as long as she could remember.

My Dear Trixie,

I hope Wisconsin is doing you well! You must be DREADFULLY bored! Would you like to spend your summer staying with us in New York? I’ll pay for train fare. I’m sure you are old enough now that Aunt Eleanor won’t mind. Do write back!

Love, your Pearl. xxxx

Trixie’s mother had been reluctant - Trixie was too naive, too trusting, too young, she had fretted.

“But Mamma,” Trixie had argued, “It’s Pearl . You know her. She’s a very responsible girl. I won’t get into trouble with her and Max - Mr. Malanaphy - looking after me. And she said she’ll pay for train fare!”

Her mother had sighed.

“Tell Pearl we shall pay her back,” she finally said. “But… perhaps. You have been very helpful lately, very mature. It might do you good to get out of Wisconsin for a summer.”

So here she was, in New York City. Max and Pearl had a flat overlooking Central Park which was one of the nicest places Trixie had ever seen, more beautifully decorated even than the mayor’s house back home where she used to clean the floors.

“Please, make yourself at home,” Max said warmly, his accent betraying his British roots and making him seem very sophisticated. Though he wasn’t too much older than Pearl, his hair was already a steely grey. He was handsome, Trixie guessed, tall and lanky with a long straight nose and fair skin. He’d been an officer in the war, with medals to prove it, but now worked somehow in trade. Trixie was rather confused about the exact nature of his job, but he did do well for himself, it seemed. Pearl was just as pretty as Trixie had pictured her, even more so maybe. Her hair was pale blonde, her eyes blue and shaded by long dark lashes. She dressed well, too; pale, floaty dresses that showed off her slim, attractive figure in a way Trixie’s mother would have considered vulgar. Trixie considered it wonderful.

“Tonight we’re going to see the most wonderful jazz singer,” Pearl gushed as she bustled about the flat, tidying up what was to be Trixie’s new roo,. “Kennedy Davenport herself. They say she’s the Josephine Baker of New York.”

Trixie had no idea who Josephine Baker was, but she nodded.

“Am I coming with you?”

“Of course,” said Pearl. “If you want to. And you must promise not to write home about where it is.”

“What do you mean?”

Pearl smirked. “I guess you know drinking alcohol is illegal now,” she said. Trixie nodded again, suspicious.

“Well, Max and I just happen to know a little place that gets around that pesky Eighteenth,” she grinned. “It also happens to be an absolute hotspot of talent in every colour, shape, and size. None of which you’d find on the outside, either. But it’s all very hush-hush. Can you keep it a secret?”

Trixie frowned, considering. She couldn’t help thinking of her mother’s warnings, her promises to stay out of trouble, but eventually she squared her shoulders. “Yes. I can.”

“Oh, isn’t that the bee’s knees !” chirped Pearl, clasping her hands together in excitement. “I hope you have something nice to wear!”

Max beckoned for Trixie to follow him and Pearl down a flight of steps to the basement of an old unassuming brownstone - something so well hidden, so inconspicuous, that by day it would have had no hint of its true nature.

“This definitely doesn’t seem legal,” muttered Trixie. Max nodded understandingly, his grey hair illuminated by the gas lamps, his pale face almost haunting in the dim shadow.

“I was worried too, my first time. But don’t worry. The cops tend to overlook this place. Mostly because of Madame Zamolodchikova’s bribery.”

“And her sex appeal,” snorted Pearl. “You know she’d be in prison for alcohol possession right now if she didn’t look like she did.”

Trixie gulped.

“Madame what ?”

Pearl laughed.

“Katya Zamolodchikova. Max, we know her well enough, you can stop putting on airs.” Max huffed.

“First-name bases are overrated, darling.”

The speakeasy was dark, clouded with smoke and pervasive with the scent of alcohol. A black girl with large light eyes and an elaborate feathered costume sang jazz on a small raised stage.

“Kennedy Davenport,” whispered Max, “an absolute genius. I can’t believe she’s performing at Madame Zamo’s. She’s been signed with all the big labels uptown already.”

The band picked up and began to play a peppier jazz tune.

“Oh, let’s dance,” exclaimed Pearl, grasping onto her lover’s wrist. She looked vibrant and lovely even in the dim light, her pale blonde hair coiffed into finger-waves and her thin, flat-chested body draped in a short pale pink dress.

Trixie hung back, feeling inadequate and dumpy in the pale blue gingham she’d brought from home. It was too modest and too hokey and too Wisconsin for a place like this.

“Don’t you want to dance?” called Pearl, expertly twisting her body into the Charleston with Max.

“Um…” Trixie froze. “I think I’ll watch. For now.” She sat on a plush red couch, folding her legs the way her mother had always taught her. This - the dress that looked nunlike next to Pearl’s - was still the shortest dress she’d ever worn. As she sat, it hiked above her knees and made her feel very daring and very, very bad.

“It’s quite all right, darling,” came a gravelly, foreign voice from startlingly close behind her. Trixie turned around to face an elegant blonde woman, all red lips and picture star hair and sharp cheekbones and bony limbs, dressed in furs and diamonds and reeking of smoke. “Not everyone is a dancer. Some of us prefer to sit back and watch, yes?”

“Leave her alone, Katya,” said Pearl, rolling her eyes as she walked towards Trixie and the mysterious woman. “Trixie’s terrified, the poor dear.”

Katya , thought Trixie as the realization dawned in her brain, this is the owner of the speakeasy, the bootlegger, herself.

“Terrified? Trixie, dear, you have no reason to be terrified,” cooed the blonde woman, the “r”s in her speech trilled and drawn out. “You are not hiding in ditch from Red Army.”

Trixie blinked.

“ What ?”

“I am only teasing,” affirmed this Katya. “Can I get you something to drink? What do you like?”

“I’ve, um, actually never drank alcohol before,” confessed Trixie.

“Have you not?” Katya’s eyes, which were a startling blue, filled with mischief. “Well, today we have a little bit of everything. Scotch from Scotland, gin from England, vodka from Russia, champagne from France, rum from the West Indies.”

Trixie had no idea what any of those things tasted like, but she knew what champagne was; she decided on ordering that.

“A good choice, Trixie,” commented Katya as she bustled about, pouring a glass.

“How is business on the North Shore, Miss Zamolodchikova?” murmured Max, pronouncing the foreign surname perfectly. He’d obviously practiced.

“Oh, excellent, excellent. You have spoken with Dardo about the latest shipment?”

“Of course.” Pearl glanced nervously at Trixie, who had been pretending not to pay attention.

“This doesn’t concern you, Trixie,” she whispered, giving her hand a squeeze - amiable, yet firm in its message to make herself scarce.

“Oh. All right. Sorry.”

Trixie left the couch, casting glances the others’ way and kicking herself inwardly for not realizing that Pearl herself - and Max, too, then, were bootleggers, gangsters. It certainly explained Max’s wealth and his frequent trips to London.

As the night dragged on, Trixie tried hard not to trail after Pearl, but it proved difficult. Katya seemed to take Trixie under her wing, providing her with drinks and making small talk. Trixie learnt the older woman was originally from Russia, and had spent time living with artists and ingenues in Paris before settling comfortably in Long Island, nestled on the funds from her speakeasy.

“It is, of course, ridiculous what you must do to have a little fun in this country,” she explained, taking a drag on a cigarette. Trixie always thought of cigarettes as being in the realm of men, but Katya managed to make it feminine and even sensual. It was no wonder, she thought, that all the gangster men went after her.

“Why don’t you go back to your country, then?” asked Trixie. She realized how rude she must have sounded only when the Russian woman’s blue eyes misted with tears.

“Oh, my dear, I have no country to go back to. Ever since damn Communists killed the tsar. I came to Paris as refugee when I was not much older than you, you see. All alone - my parents were killed in the fighting.” Katya swallowed hard. “Everything you see, I make myself. My entire life here in America, I make myself.”

“‘Golly,” whispered Trixie. Her childhood had been far from ideal; she knew what it was to be hungry, to wear clothes that never fit right. But poor as she had been, Katya’s story made her background seem near idyllic.

“It is all right. We all have our crosses to bear,” said Katya quietly. “I do not dwell too much in the past. And besides, in Russia I could not do this ,” she said, grasping Trixie’s bare thigh with her pale hand. Trixie tensed.

“What is wrong with you?” she exclaimed. The Russian’s hand felt good, exciting even, but it was all wrong. Men weren’t supposed to do this to ladies, let alone other ladies. Trixie’s mother would probably have a heart attack if she could see her daughter right now.

Katya retracted her hand, a look of shame spreading across her face.

“I am sorry, Trixie, I thought you knew. Here in my bar, we are very open about our… sexual differences, you see. In Paris it was all the rage. Every woman I knew was intimate with other women. But New York, even, is not Paris. This I know now.” Trixie’s anger faded as she saw Katya’s face etched with worry. Katya was no predator - she was just a woman, a woman like Trixie, who fell in love with other women. Maybe, just maybe, Trixie even felt the same way. The Russian woman was so unlike anyone back home, she couldn’t be sure; the way she smoked like a man, the way her accent made Trixie’s name a rolling wave, the way she showed so much kindness and openness and understanding. The way this place seemed to be safe for people like Kennedy to sing and Katya to love, it couldn’t be a bad thing. When you love someone everything falls into place…

“I hope we can still be friends, Trixie,” Katya was saying now. “Nothing really happened.”

“Yeah. Nothing happened,” confirmed Trixie. “But if something were to happen, I don’t think I would mind.”

#please remember your tags!!#trixya #trixie mattel #katya zamolodchikova #rpdr fanfiction #ladyalix #great gatsby au #green light in my eyes #lesbian au #aag

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newagesispage · 5 years

Text

OCTOBER 2019

PAGE RIB

Stephen King has released yet another: The Institute

*****

Salmon Rushdie has given us Quichotte

*****

October 1: Jimmy Carter is 95!! Go Jimmy

*****

For some new discoveries and theories on the often told tale, check out Chaos: Charles Manson, the CIA and the secret history of the 60,s by Tom O’Neill.

*****

Metallica has cancelled their tour.

*****

The Creamery Bridge in Vermont was closed for a time because of a Sasquatch scare.

*****

Days alert: Woo Hoo!! Dr. Rolf is back!! ** Why do they keep using that ‘WET PAINT’ sign all over the town square? A joke? Really painting the sets and they just leave them up for an inside laugh? ** The Shah/Jen story was good.. it showed what a good actor he really was. He was always so blah! It’s funny that as he left us , we finally get his back story. He even mentioned Norman Bates. ** Stefan is out. Claire is in. I loved Dr. Rolf’s “pro life” line. Will many of the young girls get pregnant, ( think Lani, Ciara, Gabi, Sarah, Haley and Kristen) and will all the babies get mixed up and will Days jump a year ahead? Well, that’s the rumor. ** What is up with Hope?

*****

Senator Chuck Grassley is applying for his second bailout since October for the farm he owns. ** $30 billion in welfare has been given to farmers.

*****

This whole vaping scare is not really a surprise. Why do companies have to be so greedy and fill these with nicotine anyway? Why do good flavors have to be taken off the market because parents can’t keep them away from the kids? Can’t we have fun flavored simple mist in a vaping apparatus that has no dangerous chemicals? So many people just need that occasional outlet and something to do when relaxing.

*****

Spy devices were found near the White House. They believe Israelis are responsible.

*****

Word is that around Liberty University, Jerry Falwell Jr. uses fear in dealing with staff and sends them pictures of his wife in sexual situations.

****

They need to make a biopic about Rickie Lee Jones and it should star Hillary Swank. JS

*****

A CIA source has been pulled from Russia they say because Trump can’t be trusted not to tell Putin who he is. The operative is the agent who confirmed the interference in the 2016 election and has worked there for decades.

*****

Rose McGowan and some of the Me too movers and shakers would like Lisa Bloom to be disbarred after her dealings with Harvey Weinstein.

*****

Mark Sanford is running for President.

*****

Sarah Palin’s husband has filed for divorce.

*****

Stacey Dash was arrested for domestic battery in Florida.

*****

Stranger Things has been renewed for season 4.

*****

Hey.. Robert King.. Glad that U R back!

*****

People from Alabama were calling the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration in a panic after scary clown 45 included them in the path of Hurricane Dorian. Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross threatened to fire meteorologists who contradicted the idiot.

*****

John Legend and Chrissy Teigen got into it with the Pres. She called him a pussy ass bitch.

*****

In the 80’s, 80% of our clothing were made here in the U.S., now it is 3%.

*****

The House Judiciary committee is holding hearings about hush money to Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels.

*****

Conversion therapy leader, McKrae Game has announced he is gay.

*****

It is odd that we don’t hear more about women who are addicted to crime shows. It is such a thing.

*****

Weight Watchers is not WW. OK.

*****

North Carolina’s political maps have been deemed unconstitutional and must be redrawn.

*****

In Nashville, Rev. Dan Reehil has banned Harry Potter books at the St. Edwards School

*****

Why does Fallon imitate his guests all the time? He is always repeating what they do much like a child would.

*****

Scary Clown’s personal assistant, Madeline Westerhout is out.** John Bolton is out.

*****

$32.50 for a Trump key chain? What?

*****

SNL started off the season with a bang. Woody Harrelson hosted and ended by showing support for Greta Thunberg. The next hosts will be Phoebe Waller- Bridge, David harbor, Kristen Stewart and Eddie Murphy.

*****

A man was chopping down an old diseased tree when a cannonball fell out of it. This particular cannonball in a tree was near a home that was used as a hospital during the first battel of independence, Mo. in the Civil War.

*****

In Kentucky, Mitch McConnell said yes to treasury funds for an aluminum plant backed by a Russian oligarch. He said no to treasury funds for coal miner’s health care and pensions.

*****

Joe Biden pledges to take no fossil fuel money but then attended a fundraiser hosted by Andrew Goldman, founder of Natural Gas Company, Western LNG.** It’s so sad, Biden leads which makes it seem that the people who pay the least attention decide who is going to run this place.** He really has to stop saying, “Look”, all the time.

*****

The Sept. 12 Dem debate was exciting, I loved the kudos that Biden and then others gave to Beto for his actions in Texas after the shootings. Other than that Biden seemed to stumble a lot especially with his, “make sure the kids hear words” stuff. O’Rourke seems to have finally hit his stride with, “Hell yes, we’re gonna take your AR-15’s.” I’m not even sure I agree but I loved so much that he had the guts to say it. I’m in! His only real problem was the color of his tie, it washed him out. Later, Briscoe Cain sent a tweet to Beto: My AR-15 is ready for you.** Yang, as usual was not given enough time but he did calm the others when they wanted to spar. He spoke so clearly and did not sidestep. He had a great point with the U.S. not starting wars because we are not too good at rebuilding. Case in point: Puerto Rico. He also proposed $100 in democracy dollars so people can participate and give to the candidates they believe in. He seemed to tear up when talking about missing his son’s first day at school. His salesmen pitch like giveaway was too much though. ** Buttigieg had a good idea with his ‘community rural visas’ to bring immigration everywhere.** Warren and Sanders were straight forward with no real surprises. Gotta thank Bernie for reminding us that he didn’t vote for Bush’s war or Trumps military spending bills and the crowd seemed to love him. Both at the debate and after (like Bari Weiss on Maher’s overtime), people keep calling Bernie ‘President’. Accidents? ** Harris was cool and calm but seemed a bit scripted. She was the only one to really bring up Trump. ** Protestors had to be cleared as Biden started his final words. They were yelling, “We are DACA recipients. Our lives are at risk.” I’m sure it had to unnerve him as he began to talk of his sad life and his family. The late night comics said that he did a good job but I didn’t think so.** Klobachar told us a lot about herself. I think I learned the most about her. Castro, who I really liked a lot at the first debate, should just get out after this performance. ** Why was Rahm Emanuel there?** The Trump campaign sent a banner flying over Texas Southern University. ** DeBlasio is out.

*****

By the end of September, Warren is #1 in New Hampshire. She is 2 points behind in the nation and Yang is #4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“We will no longer sell the AR-15 to the public.”- Colt Thanks Beto!! A simple candidate has made more positive change than Scary Clown. Stop being so scared Dems, change can happen!

*****

When Warren was on Colbert she said,” Why don’t we just quit now and do a selfie line? The selfies are the most fun about this. Really? The night before, after her rally she selfied for 4 hours.

*****

Young people will propel the changes in the views of this country. The young demographic thinks differently on guns and climate and the young usually rule eventually. VOTE!!

*****

An intelligence official filed a formal whistle blower complaint against our ruthless Archie Bunker on steroids about his interaction with a foreign leader. It seems that it was a phone call with Ukraine’s Zelinski about the Biden’s but things are still unfolding. Did he pressure people to work with Guilliani? The transcript is out and Pelosi has started a formal impeachment inquiry. When the WH sent talking points to their republican colleagues to try to calm the waters, they accidently sent them to the Dems too. The WH also moved the info to a private server as we now know there is even more stuff there. Wouldn’t it be justice if the private server brought him down? ** Blame is flying everywhere. Trump has thrown Barr and Rudy and even Pence into the mess. Rudy tells us that he went to the Ukraine for the state department but they say no! He has been so rude and unhinged on the talk circuit. He has now been subpoened.** Joseph Maguire, acting director of National intelligence was only on the job a few days when he was informed of the whistleblower complaint. He was questioned all day in hearings and was very polite. Both sides could calm down on the snarky.** The Secretary of State is basically holding down 3 jobs. The WH is quite under staffed and there is talk that they may bring in outside people to handle the situation but Trump does not want that. The campaign is where they will really fight, that is where all their money is. ** The ambassador to Ukraine has stepped down.**

*****

Now word is that Trump and Barr tried to get Australian PM Scott Morrison to look into those who were behind the Russia investigation. Pompeo is now getting pulled in too. It is really like the tin foil hat conspiracy guy down the street is running this country.

*****

Never compare your insides to someone else’s outside. -Thank you Rob Lowe

*****

Hillary and Chelsea are headed out to promote their new book, Gutsy Women. It is impeccable timing but I am sure she is so sick of talking about the big blowhard elephant in the room. It really is time to hear from her again.

*****

Law and Order SVO started its 21st season with a little nod to Gunsmoke. What a great touch.

*****

Has the military really spent $200,000 on Trump’s Scottish resort?

*****

What’s up with the Cleveland Browns? They are winning.

*****

4 feet of snow in September in Montana?

*****

Seth Meyers went too far with his Rudy hate. I am a bit disturbed that Seth, Maher and Colbert get nearly as bold in the other direction as Fox News. Yes, these are evil people running the country and there is enough that they do without calling them out on things that are not your business. About Rudy marrying a second cousin, Seth said “that’s awful.” Don’t pass your prejudice and judgement on these people like others do on color and religion et al. Cousins can marry, it’s not illegal and how might that make the children of cousins feel?

*****

Pennsylvania Senator Michael Folmer was arrested for child porn that was on his computer and has since resigned. I am sure that if he went on Fox and said nice things about the fearless leader that he could get a job in the White House. It seems to be the way it is done, Fox is the audition.

*****

Robert C. O’Brien is the new National Security Advisor.

*****

The family of John Dillinger do not believe that he is in the grave. A body id buried in Indianapolis but they have asked for an exhumation.

*****

Millions came out on the 20th to ask for action on climate change. Go Greta Thunberg !! Some are spinning it that since she is autistic, she has been abused by her parents by being forced into her activism. I have seen no evidence this. She makes more sense than most leaders on the subject. Fox’s Michael Knowles even called her mentally ill and has since apologized. Thoughts? ** Central America is starving to death because of the impact of climate change. Reports from the Trump administration prove this and aid has been cut off which causes migration.

*****

Trump us jumping into bed with Saudi Arabia who has the 5th largest defense budget in the world. Troops are being sent to Iran.

*****

Doc Martin is here with its 9th season. The dog will fall in love. The Doc and Louisa’s relationship is doing well as their careers are shifting. It all just reminds me how much I want to live in Cornwall.

*****

The biggest grossing tours of all time as of this year are. 1. Ed Sheeran: The Divide 2. U: 360 3. Stones: A Bigger Bang 4. Guns N Roses: Not in this lifetime 5. Coldplay: A Head Full of Dreams 6. Roger Waters: The Wall 7. AC/DC: Black Ice 8. Stones: No Filter 9. Bruno Mars: 24K 10. Madonna: Sticky and Sweet

*****

James Corden put Bill Maher in his place. Fat shaming is as wrong as any other. Bullying is never funny. The week after Maher’s rant, Michael Moore went on and had lost some weight. Hmmm.

*****

Hiking with Kevin has the best guests, there is really a cross section of all kinds of people. A hike seems to break down defenses and the stories are great!!

*****

The North Dakota pipeline spill that was said to be 10 gallons worth was really millions of gallons.

*****

Almost Family is a show about a sperm donor. It is good to see Tim Hutton again.

*****

A woman gets a late night show.. check out A Little Late with Lilly Singh.

*****

Prodigal Son stars Michael Sheen as a serial killer called The Surgeon.

*****

Julian Fellowes will bring us The Gilded Age about 1885 New York.

*****

Some are freaking about all the official stays at Trump properties. The whole thing is a ridiculous mess. Mitch and the boys would be screaming to the heavens if this was a different President. The really sad part is that the crews that are just there to help POTUS and the VP say the stays are so costly that their expenses won’t even cover food. ** Did a Glasgow refueling stop finally tip off the house oversight committee to the far reach of all these expenditures?** They claim there is never anything to hide. Why do they always hide everything?

*****

Demi Moore has a new tell all titled Inside Out that seems full of revelations.

*****

Check out the saga of the Donald J. Trump state park in NY which is really nothing more than a tax write off full of overgrown land and abandoned old buildings.

*****

Check out the Art Bell vault.

*****

Scary Clown was going to meet with the Taliban at Camp David as 9/11 was upon us.** The Taliban says their doors re open.**Word is that the congressional inquiry into 9/11 has 28 redacted pages which showed evidence of the Saudi’s involvement in the attacks.

*****

Scottish courts ruled that Boris Johnson illegally suspended parliament.

*****

From his reaction, Colbert behaves like Letterman in that a guest should dress a certain way. Personally, I like Conan’s casual ways. Now, I like Colbert but he also seems to push people to talk politics when they don’t really want to. Move on!

*****

“We are in a very difficult situation at the moment, especially in the U.S., where all the environmental controls that were put in place, that were just about adequate have been rolled back by the current administration so much that they are being wiped out.” –Mick Jagger

*****

“When you’re 85 years old and you have children and grandchildren, you will leave them nothing if we don’t vote these people out of office in Brazil, in London, in Washington. They are ruining the world.” –Donald Sutherland

*****

Check out the new film, The Burnt Orange Heresy.

*****

Finn Wittrock, Paul Giamatti and Amy Irving will appear in A Mouthful of Air.

*****

“The lungs of the earth are in flames.” – Leo Dicaprio. The Amazon, the world’s most diverse eco system is getting no help from its own leaders and they won’t accept help from the G7. It’s all about building more crap to them. It is as if three fourths of the U.S. was on fire.** Wouldn’t it be a great idea if Jeff Bezos, who has taken flak for not paying taxes and for workers conditions would step up and pledge a huge sum to help save the rainforest that bears its name?? The world needs heroes.

*****

Better Call Saul has wrapped season 5.

*****

Hasbro has bought Death Row Records.

*****

The San Francisco board of supervisors has declared the NRA a terrorist organization.

*****

New SNL cast member Shane Gillis who was in hot water after racist remarks surfaced, has been let go before he ever hit the stage.

*****

Mike Pence claims he was bit by American Pharoah but his trainer is not too sure about that.

*****

Obama Netflix?

*****

Kieran Culkin and Jazz Charton had a little girl that they named Kinsey Sioux.

*****

Dollface on Hulu looks interesting.

*****

In sexual harassment news: Brett Kavanaugh has been hit with other allegations. Not all accusations are coming from the victims.** Placido Domingo has been accused by 20 women of unwanted advances.

*****

The71st Emmys have come and gone. There is a lot to celebrate in television right now with over 500 scripted original shows. Highlights include Norman Lear winning for Live in front of a studio audience: Norman Lears’s All in the Family and The Jeffersons to become the oldest winner ever at 97. Other winners were Leaving Neverland for best doc. Glow won for stunt coordination. Succession won for their theme and for writing. RuPaul won for reality host and Drag Race won for show. Russian Doll took home cinematoghraphy. Carpool Karaoke : When Corden met McCartney:Live from Liverpool took home a statue. Peter Dinklage won for best supporting actor, Fleabag won big and Game of Thrones took home the top prize. Other winners were Bill Hader, Patricia Arquette, Ben Whishaw, Billy Porter and Jodie Comer. SNL with Adam Sandler and Last Week Tonight were winners. I was so excited to see that Ozark won for Julia Garner and Bateman for directing. Succession won for directing. I thought the fashion went wrong with Amy Poehler, and Dascha Polanco. There was awesome fashion with Regina King, Viola Davis, Maya Rudolph, Bob Odenkirk, Billy Porter, Angela Bassett, Michelle Williams, Kerry Washington, Zendaya, Sarah Silverman, Catherine Zeta- Jones, Karamo Brown, Gwyneth Paltro, Catherine O’Hara, Emilia Clarke, Phoebe Waller Bridge and Niecy Nash.** The In memoriam was fucked up when they honored Andre Previn but showed a very much alive Leonard Slacken. Let me run that part of the show, they are always messing that up. It may not matter much longer because the ratings were so low. It is already a shame that they don’t broadcast the daytime Emmy’s.

*****

R.I.P. Jim Leavelle, Carol Lynley, T Boone Pickens, Daniel Johnston, Robert Frank, Ric Ocasek, Eddie Money, Sander Vanocur , Peter Lindbergh, Robert Haunter, Jacques Chirac , Jose Jose , Bob Esty, Wayne Fitzgerald, Jessye Norman and Cokie Roberts.

0 notes

rutisup-blog · 6 years

Text

Castle Rock Tanning Club #2

“He shot me down…bang bang…I hit the ground bang bang…my baby let me down.”

Kill Bill just started. Uma Thurman is beating the shit out of some black chick. I’m just sippin’ some Fat Tire. Mike, Joel, Ken, and some other dude are here. Other dude just broke me off a piece of Toblerone. “Now that’s a fine piece of ass…looks just like Larissa’s ass” said one of them during a scene of Uma Thurman wearing tight jeans. A discussion breaks out about Larissa being a masseuse.

“He’s not gay, he just eats his corn the long way”. says one of them. These dirty old men just don’t stop with the jokes. So, where was I with that my castle rock adventure…

* * *

I set my alarm for 10:15…I’m of the philosophy of trying to get to brunch at a reasonable hour. It’s hard to tell what time it is when you don’t have windows in your room. I woke up several times, as per usual. Partly due to drinking last night, and partly from having two roommates.

I throw on some sweats and a black and white palm tree shirt—one of like six shirts in my inventory here. Time to saunter down for brunch. I don’t even have flip-flops here. I had a little preview of brunch around midnight when they started serving midrats brunch. I was sitting at a table talking to some sous-chef who mentions she’s from Russia in every conversation.

The table we sat at was round, wooden, and full of galley chow. I saw she had a polaroid photo of some guy tucked into her clear gel iPhone case. The other girl at the table had a pink clear water bottle full of water—or what appears to be otherwise. It turns out that it’s just vodka. There’s also a polaroid of someone I carry, it’s just in the ID Pouch of my wallet. “He’s down at Pole” she says.

Enough midrats…back to real brunch. It’s 10:45 and I’m sitting at a table with my friends–basically just a bunch of fuckin’ dudes. There’s gotta be like eight of us all around one of those big wooden tables. Cheeses of every kind were out–per usual–and fresh berries—unusual. Got damn, were there ever a lot of fresh berries available at brunch. After I ate my fill I decided it would be tasty to make a berry margarita in my HydroFlask. I mix some fresh strawberries and raspberries, margarita mix, and that god awful Jose Cuervo together in my HydroFlask with some ice. Surprisingly, it tastes good

It’s another Castle Rock day with the Castle Rock Tanning Club (CRTC). Joel, Tim, and I are going out there per usual to do some snowboarding. Some other people raise an interest over brunch, and we recruit some people to slide down on their lunch trays in lieu of skis or snowboards.

People come and go from our busy table, but we agree to “Meet up at the hand-wash at 12:00”. It’s about 11:20 now, and I call it quits on brunch. I get ready, putting on my snow pants and packing my backpack full of goodies: four PBRs, a HydroFlask full of Berryrita, and a flask of tequila. I grab a to-go paper bowl full of French toast for the road. It takes me longer than you would think to get all of that together, and I’m hustling to get a move on.

We make it out the gate around 13:00, late as per usual. There’s a balloon launch planned for today at 20:00. We check-out of the station at the firehouse with less trouble than our first attempt and then head off down the road towards Castle Rock. We’ve got to walk up the hill and out of town again. “Let’s see if we can get a ride, we’re walking past shuttles anyways” says Tim. He runs inside as we pass Building 140, the building shared by shuttles and the post office. A minute later Tim bursts out of the building. “Load up!” he says. Sick, it worked—we’re getting a ride up that treacherous hill.

The Ford E-250 lumbers up the hill as we pass three people on fat tire bikes. “I bet Bernie’s involved” I say as we creep up on them slowly powering up the hill. Upon closer inspection I see a dude with white Oakleys on pumping away—Bernie. Called it.

Onwards. We get dropped off at the trailhead. We march onwards through the snow—much more manageable and packed down from last week. Tim found an NRK-9 strap for me to fashion as a board sling, so I’m not dragging my snowboard in the snow this time. Joel slips on a little ice, we all have some conversation. It’s a two hour hike up to the rock.

“Who’s the lone ranger, walking back” I say as we see a pale man walking our way. “Man, Is that Vinnie? He walks like him”. says Tim. As we get closer to each other we realize, shit, that’s Velcro Vinnie! We ask him what the heck he is doing alone, and the conversation goes as follows:

“Oh are you supposed to bring someone?” “Did you even do a footplan?” “Nah”.

We ask him to come up to the rock with us, but he wants to get back for Sunday massage / self-massage class. Sayanora.

Icebridge DC-3 Basler

The first apple passes us by, but we stop at the second one for a little rest and chill-sesh. I crack a cold one and Joel opens a bottle of Scrumpy. I get the speaker going, we drag the chair outside into the snow. It’s a beautiful day in Antarctica, a balmy 30 degrees Fahrenheit. I shed my jacket and hang out in my cover-alls and t-shirt–It was pretty sweet out here. We pop the hatch in the apple and Tim uses a snowboard to prop the door open. We wave hello at everyone going past us.

Onwards. We close up the apple and head up to castle rock. We slog up the hill and up to the rock. We mount it and hang out a little on the ridge, our chill spot from the inaugural discovery expedition. About 15 minutes go by and we see Justin–from brunch–coming down off the top of the rock. “Hey! What’s up dude, wanna come up again with us?” says Tim. “Yeah, sure”.

Ropes have been set in the rock, leading us up to the top. We get up there about 5 minutes later, finding our promised land awaiting. There’s no one else up here, just lots of rock. There’s a nice flat clearing with some nearly black volcanic rocks. It’s huge up here, you could have a whole camp site here. We set up shop, laying our bags down. Shirts pop off, suns out guns out. It’s nice and warm. There’s a flight coming in at 16:00, so we hang out. Drinks are flowing. We all lay down on our clothes—our own makeshift blankets. Justin brought his own blanket but I just didn’t have the cargo space.

We hear a plane coming in for a landing. It’s NASA’s Icebridge DC3 Basler. It’s painted red white and blue, making it stand out. I grab my camera and snap some photos of the landing. It’s pretty neat.

Groups of people come and go from the top of the rock. “We don’t bite!” yells Tim at them. One guy was even wearing a big red. Meanwhile, we’re here topless. They look disturbed by our presence. At the edge of the rock we find a little ridge area we can hang out it that blocks the wind. Heck yeah. We end up migrating over there, piece by piece. It’s a beautiful thing. Meanwhile, all these people that are on the other end of the rock kind of stay up in that windy area, afraid to come down to us at the clearing.

“This is the firehouse announcing an uncontrolled landing. FROZEN11 will be landing at 1635.” Nice, looks like we got a little airshow. Uncontrolled landing sounds scary, but that just means that there’s no air-traffic controllers working right now. There was supposed to be some LC-130 Hercules landing today, this must be one of them. We take some photos posing in front of the beautiful mountains—the Royal Society range and Mt. Discovery–taking advantage of this beautiful day.

Brrrraaaappppppppp. We can hear the throaty sounds of a plane coming in over the sea ice. It’s that LC130, greenish with a red stripe on the tail. The Air National Guard flies those. It photographs beautifully, foregrounding the Royal Society Range.

30 minutes later and the same thing again–another LC-130. This time I grab the binoculars and track its landing—it looks even cooler, those binoculars much more powerful than my 55-250 lens. Watching a giant plane land on skis like that never gets old. I think it’s the only large aircraft that has skis for its landing gear.

LC-130 coming in for a landing. It’s got 5000 pounds of package mail for us.

The LC-130 joins two other LC-130s, two DC3 Baslers, and a Twin Otter.

I’m at that perfect buzz, just enjoying the beautiful weather. We’re getting ready to head out now, unsure if we should wait for the balloon launch at 20:00.

The fog gets thicker minute by minute back over the sea ice. It’s starting to come up over the top. The visibility that way has dropped to almost zero. It’s a good time to leave. We pack up our HQ and head back over the top of Castle Rock, to the rope routes down the rock. There’s a couple of people that have just come up—a little late for the party. They’re laying prone looking out into the fog as we depart the rock. Strange.

We climb down, feelin’ pretty tired. We strap into our snowboards and skis. Joel is having trouble with his bindings again. It’s kind of funny to watch, he’s kind of at his wits end with these cheap gear-issue alpine skis.

It’s way clearer than last weekend. Out over the permanent ice shelf it’s clear as day—a wall of fog behind us, now spilling over castle rock. I ride down, looking back at the stark beauty of fog flowing over Castle Rock, like cream over coffee, or dry ice and ice cream like they used to serve at Moxie’s.

Antarctic fog

It’s a nice minute-long ride down the mountain and then it flattens out. It’s what I would call the equivalent of a ‘green’ run in California. It’s not so fun after, hiking uphill until we can get to the next slope. We get over the ridge, and see the beautiful long run down to the ‘Kiwi Ski Hill’ and where the ‘green apple’ warm-up hut is. We peer over at the Long Distance Balloon Facility (LDB) to see if the balloon is launching. It kind of seems like it could be, so we walk out of the boundary zone and to this rock ridge overlooking the ice shelf. There’s some Pisten Bully tracks, so we figure it must be fairly safe.

Nothing is really happening down at LDB upon closer inspection. We strap in and get going down the mountain. It’s pretty fun…as far as McMurdo snowboarding goes. I slalom down the hill between the flags–having a ball. And then we hit the bottom and that’s over. Hours of hiking for just those two little runs. Still, worth it. I would rate the second run a ‘blue’ or even ‘bluegreen’ on the California scale.

We rest a bit in the green apple (ol’ granny smith), hanging out before our long walk back. It’s about four miles back to base from here. About 1.5 – 2 miles until the main road. We see some shuttles drive by—damn it. They look so close, but they’re still another 30 minutes of walking. Long gone by the time we get there.

More walking, and then we finally are nearly at the main road. A slow ‘delta’ heads out the opposite direction we need to go. I get on the radio:

“Shuttleops, Castle Rock Rec Group”. “Shuttles, go ahead”. “Can we get a ride from the snow road?” “uhhh..well we got a delta coming back from Willy in about half an hour, you can grab that…”.

Dang. So we walk another mile, walking past Scott Base and the pressure ridges. We see a dot off into the distance–that’s the Delta we saw earlier on its way back. We hang out atop some Concrete barriers and try to check out LDB again. Hard to tell what’s going on. Looks like a balloon or something is on the ground. Eventually the Delta drives by. The driver keeps driving. “Shuttle Delta” I say on the radio, and she stops–this lady is in a hurry.

We climb up those rough, metal, drop-down stairs into the passenger compartment. A delta has big fat tires that are nearly five feet tall and really puffy, it’s got like 8 of em, and the driver cab is separated from the back. We climb in, strapping into the bench style leather seats lining the sides. These things are bumpy as all hell and go about 7 MPH up the hill.

A grouchy National Guardman is the sole passenger, looking grumpy behind his Oakleys that they had to stop and pick us up. It strains up and over the hill, and half an hour later we’re back at McMurdo–starving. We drop our shit off and then stop by the galley.

I grab a tray, plate, knife and fork and start walking up to the food line.

“Dude, don’t we have to check back in?” “What time is it?” “22:57”. “Shit.”

Visions of salty search & rescue team members and firefighters paged for no reason enter my mind. I just leave my tray with my plate on it by the food line in the galley, abandoning it on some ledge. We hustle back to the firehouse to check in, and when I go back to the galley my stuff is still there—oooh yeah baby. Nothing like chowing down on some food after a long day. We get news that they rescheduled the balloon launch to another day–perfect.

And I went straight to bed after that.

Castle Rock Tanning Club #2 was originally published on RUT-IS-UP

#Castle Rock #McMurdo Station

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davidcrotty-blog · 7 years

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Toxic Masculinity???

ITS A STRANGE THING FOR ME TO HEAR ABOUT MEN TALKING ABOUT HOW IT IMPORTANT IT IS TO “BE A MAN”. I FIND IT FUNNY, CONSIDERING MOST OF THEM Aren’t REALLY THAT MANLY, AT LEAST BY MY JUDGEMENT, (WHICH IS PRETTY LIBERAL AS WELL) MOST GUYS I KNOW HAVE A FALSE SENSE OF MACHISMO, FOR LACK OF A BETTER WORD. I GREW UP IN ST JOSEPH MO, NOT NECESSARILY A SMALL TOWN, BUT YOU’D NEVER QUALIFY IT AS A CITY. ITS A TOWN. THE MEN THAT I GREW UP AROUND WERE YOUR CLASSIC SENSE OF THE WORD “MEN”. FARMERS, GLAZERS, METAL WORKERS. YOU NAME IT. THEY WERE MANLY MEN. THE ONLY ONE I KNEW THAT DIDN’T FIT THAT MOLD WAS MY UNCLE ADAM. I DIDN’T KNOW IT AT THE TIME, BUT HE WAS CLEARLY GAY. I JUST DIDN’T KNOW WHAT IT WAS AT THE TIME. AT LEAST NOT UNTIL ONE DAY WHEN MY MOTHER SAT ME DOWN, (I GUESS SHE JUST THOUGHT IT WAS THAT TIME) BUT SHE TOLD ME THAT YOUR UNCLE ADAM IS GAY, THATS WHEN A MAN LOVES ANOTHER MAN AND THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT, OR HIM. SHE EVEN WENT INTO DETAIL OF A BEATING HE TOOK AS TEENAGER BY SOME OTHER GUYS IN TOWN, AND HOW THEY BROKE HIS RIBS. GRANTED, HE WAS A BIT OF A SMART ASS (WHICH IS PARTLY WHY I LOVED HIIM, HE HAD SOME GREAT ONE LINERS) BUT STILL, THE MAIN DRIVING FACTOR WAS THAT HE WAS BEATEN BECAUSE HE WAS A GAY MAN, BUT ANWAYS…

HE WAS MY FIRST EXPOSURE TO A GUY THAT DIDN’T FIT THE MOLD THAT I WAS USED TO, AND I DIDN’T CARE WHATSOEVER. THATS WHAT HE DOES AND ALRIGHT THEN. MY MOM SAID THERE WAS NOTHING WRONG WITH IT AND I WAS STILL AT AN AGE WHERE EVERYTHING MY PARENTS TOLD ME WAS TAKEN AS GOSPEL, SO I BELIEVED IT WHOLE HEARTEDLY. THE SAME COULD BE SAID FOR PEOPLE WHO WERE BROUGHT UP WITH ANTI GAY SENTIMENTS. WE DON’T KNOW BETTER TO THINK FOR OURSELVES AT THE TIME. AT LEAST MOST OF US DONT. IT WAS ONLY LATER THAT I WOULD BEGIN TO DISCOVER MY OWN FEELINGS, THOUGHTS AND INTERPRETATION OF WHAT THAT WAS THAT I WOULD GET A BETTER IDEA FOR IT.

NOW I DON’T KNOW WHAT CAUSED IT, WHETHER IT WAS AN EXPOSURE TO SOMETHING THAT WAS MERELY SEXUAL IN NATURE AND THAT GOT MY ENGINE REVVING. BUT I REMEMBER SEEING STRAIGHT PORN FIRST, THEN GAY LATER ON. AND AT THAT TIME I COULD LITERALLY MASTURBATE TO A BRA CATALOGUE, (WHO ELSE IS THAT OLD?) BUT I WAS IN MY PREPUBESCENCE AND I REMEMBER MAKING OUT WITH A NEIGHBOR BOY A COUPLE YEARS YOUNGER THAN ME IN A DITCH, I ALSO REMEMBER GIVING TWO MALE CLASSMATES A BLOWJOB AT 13. NOT AT THE SAME TIME, I WASN’T THAT FREAKY. THOSE TWO EXPERIENCES ACTUALLY HAPPENED AFTER I HAD LOST MY VIRGINITY TO MY THEN GIRLFRIEND AND HER BEST FRIEND. I LIKED BOTH, WHETHER IT WAS JUST A FORM OF COMPANIONSHIP BECAUSE I WAS A LONELIER CHILD, OR JUST THE FACT THAT I FOUND IT HOT AND DISGUSTING, SO I WENT FOR IT.

THAT WAS ACTUALLY THE FIRST TIME IVE EVER WRITTEN DOWN ANY OF MY HOMOSEXUAL EXPERIENCES, IT FELT NICE. BUT BACK TO ORIGINAL POINT OF THIS ALL, THATS WHY ITS WEIRD TO HEAR ABOUT SUPER MACHO GUYS THAT DON’T HAVE ANY FEMININE FEELINGS WHATSOEVER APPARENTLY. ALL STEAKS AND PUSSY, NO FEATHERS OR COMFY CLOTHING. GRANTED I KNOW IM A FAR CRY FROM A LOT OF GUYS OUT THERE, IN TERMS OF MY “MANLINESS” (MILITARY, FIGHTERS, ETC.) EVEN THOUGH THERES PLENTY OF PEOPLE WHO ARE WAY FURTHER DOWN THE HOMO PIPELINE (NO PUN INTENDED) THAN I IN THOSE FIELDS. BUT IVE SEEN ENOUGH OF REAL MEN TO KNOW WHAT IT ACTUALLY TAKES. NOT EVEN JUST MEN, BUT A STRONG FUCKING INDIVIDUAL. REGARDLESS OF YOUR GENITALS.

1, YOU HAVE TO BE PHYSICALLY TOUGH. YES EVEN IN THE PHYSICAL SENSE. THE CLICHE OF BEING ABLE TO TAKE A PUNCH COMES UP, BUT IN THIS CASE ITS TRUE. BEING ABLE TO ENDURE PHYSICAL PUNISHMENT AND TURN INTO TRIUMPH IS SOMETHING IVE ALWAYS ADMIRED. 2, INTELLIGENCE. YES, ID CONSIDER THE GUY IN A RAINSTORM HOLDING AN UMBRELLA TO BE SMARTER THAN THE ONE WHOS A WALKING CASE OF AMMONIA. AT LEAST GET A FUCKING PONCHO OR SOMETHING. THATS ONE EXAMPLE OF MANY, BUT I THINK YOU GET THE POINT. 3, SENSITIVITY/COMPASSION. YES, THE OXYMORON IS HERE. TO BE A MAN REQUIRES A CERTAIN LEVEL OF THOSE TWO. RAISING A CHILD, BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP OR EVEN JUST BEING A NICER PERSON TO THE PEOPLE YOU COME IN CONTACT WITH. ITS ALMOST AN EVOLUTIONARY TRAIT TO ME AT THIS POINT. IF YOU’RE SO THICK THAT YOU CANT BE ABLE TO HOLD A PUPPY/KISS A BABY WITHOUT A SMILE BURNT ONTO YOUR FACE, YOU’RE A GOD DAMN SOCIOPATH. 4, MENTAL TOUGHNESS. THIS OBVIOUSLY APPLIES TO ANYONE, NO MATTER WHO ARE. WHETHER YOU APPLY IT TO DISCIPLINE, MENTAL FORTITUDE OR WHATEVER…YOU NEED IT TO SURVIVE ON THIS ROCK. I

I GUESS ALL IM REALLY TRYING TO SAY WITH ALL OF THIS IS THAT THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH GROWING AS A SPECIES. ITS 2017 AND THERES STILL HORRIFIC CRIMES GOING ON AROUND THE WORLD. THANKFULLY, ITS THE LEAST THATS EVER BEEN SINCE HUMANITY BEGAN, AND WERE GETTING BETTER DAY BY DAY. THANKS TO HUMAN BEINGS WITH ALL OF THESE TRAITS. YOU SEE A GAY MAN IN AFRICA ADVOCATING THE RIGHTS OF HIM AND EVERY OTHER PERSON IN THEIR LGBT COMMUNITY. IN FUCKING AFRICA PEOPLE..THINK ABOUT THAT. THE WORST THATS USUALLY GONNA HAPPEN TO YOU IN AMERICA IS SOME DUMBASS IS GONNA CALL YOU A FAGGOT THEN MORE THAN LIKELY GO HOME AND BEAT OFF TO GAY PORN HIMSELF.

YEAH, OBVIOUSLY SOME PEOPLE ARE STILL GONNA GET FUCKED UP IN AMERICA FOR IT, BUT AT LEAST HERE ITS AN ATROCITY AND YOU’LL BE A MARYTR FOR THE NEXT GENERATION. HELL YOU’LL PROBABLY EVEN BE RECREATED IN A MOVIE AFTER A FEW YEARS. IN AFRICA, HOWEVER…YOU’LL BE BEATEN TO DEATH ON THE STREETS IN BROAD DAYLIGHT FOR DOING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. JUST SOMEONE WANTS TO FUCK YOU UP, AND NO ONE DOES ANYTHING ABOUT IT. YOU’RE PROBABLY JUST THROWN INTO A DITCH OR YOUR FAMILY HAS TO COME COLLECT THE BODY AND PERFORM THEIR OWN BURIAL FOR YOU. OR WHO KNOWS, IF YOU’RE IN LIBERIA THEY MIGHT EVEN CUT YOU UP AND SELL YOUR MEAT AS STREET FOOD. IM NOT SAYING THATS TOTALLY TRUE, BUT IVE SEEN IT ON A VICE SPECIAL. IM JUST SAYING ITS ALL ABOUT PERSPECTIVE HERE, THAT MAKES RUSSIA LOOK LIKE THE GAY PRIDE PARADE.

ANYWAYS, TO WRAP IT UP…TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF AND OTHERS AROUND YOU. IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE WITNESSING AN INJUSTICE, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT, BUT KEEP YOURSELF IN CHECK AS WELL. DON’T GO OVERBOARD. AND FUCKING LOVE ONE ANOTHER, THATS THE EASIEST ONE, AND IF YOU CANT DO THAT, JUST MIND YOUR OWN GOD DAMN BUSINESS AND KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. UNLESS ITS FULL OF DICKS, THEN YOU’RE ALREADY DOING THAT. ONE LOVE BITCHES.

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