#where basically lily gets sick and she downplays it and is all like “it's just allergies!” and everyone's like “K” but james

[thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls]

Me explaining why all the songs on my oc playlist are there- Very Long Post apologies!!

Tagging @locke-n-k3y since they were interested :] I also repeat myself a lot here and if you have any questions pls send them my way!! This is a very mixed explanation of my story in no timeline order so understandable if you have questions!

Also now tagging @guess-how-i-stole-this-body since i think this is the one you meant? sorry if it isn’t!

The playlist in question:

Kiss Me, Son Of God by They Might Be Giants: Janette and her relationship with her cult status (She’s the leader) and her journey to get there

Gnaw by Alex G: The first half is about Adele and Josh in highschool AKA when they met and the second is Josh talking to his son Ryan

Sarah by Alex G: About Claire, Ryan’s older sister who dies later in the storyLike Real People Do by Hozier: All the romantic relationships in the story basically but mainly Karma (Ryan and Carmela)

Twin Size Mattress by The Front Bottoms: Josh and Adele’s relationship in a way

Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers: Dana talking about her ex

Feel Good Inc. by Gorillaz: The cryptid trio!! (Dana, Carmela and Ryan the main three) mainly just a song they’d sing too

Funkytown by Lipps Inc.: I imagine the cryptid trio dancing to this hehe :]]

Lone Star by The Front Bottoms: Maria and Daniel (Carmela’s parents)

Beachboy by McCafferty: RYAN!! I don’t know how to explain it tbh but yeah

I Hate My Mom by GRLwood: Claire and Adele’s (her mum) relationship

Freaks by Surf Cruse: The cryptid trio in the middle of the story

Shut Me Up by Mindless Self Indulgence: Again a song mainly just vibes but its also Jadele (Janette and Adele)

Numbers by TEMPOREX: Another ryan song!! Again idk how to explain it

The Villain I Appear To Be by Connor Spiotto and Molly Pease: Janette!! And her trying to convince herself that she isn’t a bad person

Tears Over Beers by Modern Baseball: Josh talking about Adele 

bad idea right? by Olivia rodrigo: So this is a bit of an inside joke with me and my friend but its basically the song that’d play for one of the scenes with Carmela and Ryan (but downplayed to just kissing lmao) 

bad idea! by girl in red: JADELE!! Janette and Adele. If you listen to the song its kind of self explanatory?

Why Am I Like This? by Orla Gartland: Dana! A dana song for the ages. She is not doing welll

This Is Love by Air Traffic Controller: Janette and Adele in the midway point of their relation/situationship

Gilded Lily by Cults: Janette and the cult she runs thanks to her mum

First Love/Late Spring: Claire. also one of dana’s dads, Noah

Me and My Husband by Mitski: Maria and Daniel’s relationship

Nobody by Mitski: Carmela!! Also if adele threw a pity party she doesn’t deserve :D

Be Gay, Do Drugs, Hail Satan by Super Cassette: Adele and Josh when they were younger in the 90’s

Dead Girls by Penelope Scott: Claire again!! This explains her death D:

I Bet On Losing Dogs by Mitski: Janette and her son/nephew Oliver (she adopted her nephew after her sister died)

Brutus by The Buttress: Janette and her time in the cult and the way she killed her friend Huan Lin when she was younger

Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus: Josh talking about Adele in the 90’s/early early 200’s 

Ma Belle Evangeline from Princess And The Frog: Noah talking about his late wife Laura

Dream Sweet In Sea Major by Miracle Musical: Claire except she didn’t die at sea

Don’t Try Suicide by Queen: Claire’s death. but in a goofy sense :]]

Thermodynamic Lawyer Esq, G.F.D by Will Wood and The Tapeworms: Janette again!! Basically her feeling sillyyy/hj

Goodbye Yellow Brick Road by Elton John: Ryan :[

Need 2 by Pinegrove: What I imagine plays when the cult building burns down (also this scene is where Janette dies for the first time in the story) 

Buddy Holly by Weezer: Josh- he is a big fan of Weezer

Trees by McCafferty: Josh talking about his childhood

She Wolf by Shakira: The cryptid trio would sing this :D

The Moon Will Sing by The Crane Wives: Mainly just vibes I think it suits the story

Murders by Miracle Musical: Again just vibes but it could also be when Janette killed Huan

Ring Of Fire by Johnny Cash: What would play while the cult building is burning down if this was a show

DO YOU REMEMBER ME??? by emily jeffri: Janette talking to Adele when she comes back to life

The Bug Collector by Haley Heynderickx: Maria when she left for another city and her grief and regret about leaving Carmela behind

Tongues and Teeth by The Crane Wives: Janette talking about her and Adele’s relationship (In a way since Janette is aro and its also her trying to come up with ways to convince Adele to not date her since Adele does not take no for an answer akdhdkhdj)

Everybody Loves Somebody by Dean Martin: Noah and his husband Jose

Nice 2 Know Ya- Instrumental by Sylendanna: Again just the cryptid trio vibing 

Bleed Magic by I DON’T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Adele talking about her and janette’s relationship

Bicycle Race by Queen: Just vibes :]]

Chinatown by Shakey Graves: Josh talking about Adele while she’s cheating on him

Two Birds by Regina Spektor: Claire and Ryan (the siblings ever augh)

I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE by Måneskin: Jadele (janette and adele)

Closer by Nine Inch Nails: Also Jadele do not question meeee/lh

Wet by Dazey and the Scouts: Maria and her feelings about being in a relationship

SOLUS by emily jeffri: V I B E S

Washing Machine Heart by Mitski: Maria again :[[

Murder Song (5,4,3,2,1) by Aurora: Adele and Josh

Fell In Love With A Girl by The White Stripes: Adele and Josh in primary school

The King by Sarah Kinsley: I think this would play over Ryan and Carmela’s kiss if this was a showwww

Memento Momori: the most important thing in the world by Will Wood and The Tapeworms: Janette talking to Carmela

Night Shift by Lucy Dacus: JANETTE AND HER MANY COMPLEX FEELINGS ABOUT ADELE it’s such a janette song guyssss

Sober To Death by Car Seat Headrest: Josh talking about Adele

Babooshka by Kate Bush: VIBES AGAIN

Uptown Girl by Billy Joel: Noah talking about Jose just swap girl to guy

Digital Silence by Peter McPoland: The story as a whole

Time/Space by Alex G: Oliver, Janette’s son/nephew

Non, je ne regrette rien by Èdith Piaf: A song that’d be playing while Ryan’s arm gets chopped off by Carmela

Barracuda by Heart: This just gives off Carmela vibes to me

Highway to Hell by AC/DC: Janette when she dies the first time/hj

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper by Blue Öyster Cult: I think it also fits the story as a whole

We Didn’t Start The Fire by Billy Joel: The cryptid trio

So You Wanna Marry Daisy by Spence Hood: Adele. nothing else lmao

Duvet by bôa: Maria again!!

Be Nice To Me by The Front Bottoms: Ryan talking to Carmela after she cut off his arm

You’re Not Special Babe by Orla Gartland: Josh talking to Adele

The Chicken by Bo Burnham: Literally this song explains Maria and Daniel and a bit of Carmela’s story as well

Habits by Genevieve Stokes: Dana song :]]

Where The Streets Have No Name by U2: What I imagine plays on the last epsiode as the end credits

It’s Been So Long by The Living Tombstone: Janette talking about Oliver (FNAF SONG LETS GOOO) 

Never Been Better by half•alive and Orla Gartland: Basically just Noah and Maria (they are best friends!!) 

Poison Oak by Bright Eyes: Josh :] love him sooo much

Dullahan by Worthikids: Dana song again!! She also listens to music like this

West Coast by FIDLAR: The cryptid trio

Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart by Mitski: Maria since she is one of my saddest characters D:

Mad IQ’s by I DON’T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: JADELE BELOVEDS TOXIC YURIIII!! 

Runs in the Family by Amanda Palmer: Janette and her family- also Maria

Kiss Ur Face Forever by Orla Gartland: Karma! (Carmela and Ryan)

Missus Piano by Rio Romeo: Adele talking to Janette

Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA: Ryan at Claire’s death scene and Oliver at Janette’s death

Hermit The Frog by MARINA: Janette in highschool

Step On Me by The Cardigans: Janette talking to Adele

This Hurts by Mindless Self Indulgence: Janette, Adele and Josh (they’d make the best polycule if they were all good people and nothing bad happened akdhkdhd)

Molly by Mindless Self Indulgence: Janette in highschool againnnn

Witness by Mindless Self Indulgence: V I B E S 

Lights Out by Mindless Self Indulgence: Dana’s taste in music

Personal Jesus by Mindless Self Indulgence: Some aspects of Janette and Adele’s relationship

Join Us (And Die) from TGWDLM: Janette when she comes back from the dead

Inevitable from TGWDLM: Adele if she was in TGWDLM

Lifeboat from Heathers: Claire if she had a musical song

Bed of Roses by Mindless Self Indulgence: Basically janette’s final death since she also does in a bed of roses in a sense!!

Baby Hotline by Jack Stauber’s Micropop: Josh and Adele (if Josh hadn’t transitioned)

Agape by Nicholas Britell: What would play in one of the episodes :DD

Kilby Girl by The Backseat Lovers: Karma!! Ryan and carmela beloveds <33

suffering by Amélie Farren: Carmela <333

Black Friday from Black Friday: Vibess also carmela talking to Janette

Ghost of Chicago by Noah Floersch: Ryan talking about Carmela i love them so much guys kshdjdhd

Hello My Old Heart by The Oh Hellos: Janette when she’s dying (for the last time in the story so for context she dies twice) 

If you read this far I am giving you a hug, a high five for finger guns!!! Thank you for reading my oc rambles

#if you want to see refrences of what some of the ocs look like #i have an oc tag #cryptid hunter blabs #<-that oneee #so yeah!! #locke you have no idea how long this took meeee #akdvkdhdjd #oc tag #my ocs #thoughts in the void #Spotify #listen along to the playlist while you read this? idk? #now you get a peek into my many ramblings hehee

[pellicano-sanguino]

Personal post about job hunting troubles and a difficult decision.

For three summers in a row I have been living in the upstairs of my parents’ house. This is because despite all my efforts I couldn’t get a job in my home city. Here, in my parents’ home city however, I had connections (well, my mother had connections) and I easily found work. It’s been an acceptable temporary solution, I get along with my parents just fine and there’s enough room in the house to not feel crammed with the three of us. But now my current job is coming to an end and I have to make a difficult decision.

I have been offered a permanent job here. It hurts so much to decline the offer because a permanent job would be a dream come true. With a reliable income all my money worries would be over. I could get a mortgage. I could buy a house. A real home, not just a rent apartment. A real house with a real yard, so all my gardening dreams could come true. I dream of apple trees and red currant bushes, flowerbeds filled with white lilies. Without a steady income (or a wife), I won’t ever get a mortgage. Without a steady income, I must always be financially and mentally prepared to fall back into unemployment hell.

The threat of unemployment hell looms over me like a fucking guillotine blade all the time. I’m so sick and tired of stressing over it. But it’s a part of reality I can’t escape. I have suffered long term unemployment before, it can happen again. I have sent countless job applications to companies in my home city, but haven’t got as far as job interview yet. It’s depressing when your email just fills with messages of “Thankyou for showing interest in out company! Unfortunately this time we didn’t choose you! Have a great autumn!” 

So it sounds like the reasonable thing to do would be to accept the offer for permanent job in my parents’ home city, right? Sure, if I didn’t give a damn about where I live, that would be so. But I am very fond of my own home city and I don’t want to move out of it just to get employed. A short, temporary solution like these summer jobs are ok, but moving here permanently is something I very much don’t want to do.

My parents’ city doesn’t have a sword school and it’s too far from the cities that have one that I would have to hang my sword on a wall and give up that hobby. And more importantly, my home city is where two of my good friends live. For the sake of anonymity, let’s call them Rabbit and Tigel (all friends and family members will be assigned a bestiary animal as a pseudonym. And yes, there’s a reason why Tigel’s name is spelled with an L.). 

Now, I have other friends too, and I don’t want to downplay the importance of my other friends, but Rabbit and Tigel are special. If it wasn’t for Rabbit, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. When I was younger, I was an awkward introvert that only had one friend. Because I was bullied heavily, I had trust issues and generally avoided people. One day my only friend took me to a place where a bunch of larpers gathered to play RPGs, fight with boffers and dance renaissance dances. It’s the latter that pulled me forward, despite dreading - to use a Tumblr phrase here - the mortifying ordeal of being known. Dancing has always been a great passion of mine, but I was too afraid to approach the dancers. I stood alone by the wall, watching with admiring eyes the ring of dancers at the stage. There was Rabbit, she noticed me and asked me to come dance with her. The first renaissance dance I learned was a simple thing, Branle Burgundy, but it felt magical then, my feet stomping the floor at the same beat as the other dancers’ and Rabbit’s kind, encouraging words when I messed up. It was the beginning of my larping hobby, through which I made most of my current friends.

When my only friend of the time found a boyfriend, she stopped answering to my letters and calls, slowly cutting our friendship off because she didn’t need me anymore now that she had a boy. This would have been devastating if I had not made new friends among the larpers. If Rabbit hadn’t asked me to dance with her that day, I would be very lonely. They have been the most loyal and kind friends I have ever had. Once, I was stuck in unemployment hell and fucked up filling some form and got a punishment of three months of no unemployment benefit. I had enough savings to pay the rent but food money looked dire. I made a “Well, guess I got to tighten the belt.”-type of post in social media. Soon after that Rabbit and Tigel collected funds from all of my friends and appeared at my apartment with a bag full of tiny ziplock-bags with two 2€ coins in each, labeled after the days all the way until the day my ban would be lifted. They collected food money for me, when I was in trouble. I will never forget this act of kindness.

Now times are tough for Rabbit and Tigel in turn. They run a farm together, it’s been their dream the same way a big garden is my dream. But Rabbit is very sick. While their farm is doing pretty decently (all the meat they can produce is sold and the customers would buy even more) running a small organic farm by two people still isn’t enough to keep them financially stable, so Tigel’s had to take another job in the city. She tries to help Rabbit with the farm work, but doing basically two jobs is very taxing. They could downshift the workload by having less animals to take care of, but that would chip at their income. 

Do to others what you’d wish to be done to yourself. Now it’s my turn to help. Rabbit and Tigel are too kind to accept my help unpaid, so they pay me in meat (I happily take the low quality meats that they can’t offer to restaurants) and occasionally with vegetables, berries and apples. I can’t be there every day to help them, but I like to come when there’s some big workload that needs to be done and give a hand. It’s tough, hard work, but very rewarding, because you see the results of your labor more clearly than in jobs like customer service. I also very much like spending time on their farm, it’s such a nice place.

If I permanently moved to another city, I wouldn’t be able to help Rabbit and Tigel. Sure I could travel there on a day off work, but the drive is so long that I wouldn’t be in a good fit to start doing hard labor after that. It just wouldn’t work out. If I move away, I will have to give up seeing Rabbit and Tigel for more than like twice a year. And this is why I have decided to decline the offer for the permanent job.

It doesn’t help that I’ve been under pressure from my family members to accept the job offer. I know that to them my decision seems wrong and stupid and missing a golden opportunity. But this is my life, my future. Not theirs. So I wish they would respect my decision and understand that it wasn’t an easy choice to make. But I have made up my mind. Even if it means a fall back to unemployment hell, I am not abandoning Rabbit and Tigel, not leaving my beloved home city.

#dear diary

[jilyyall]

Would you ever write one of those text message or social media AUs?

Sure! They’re basically just all dialogue, which is usually my favorite bit to write, so of course I loved this! Thanks for asking for this; I kind of missed the boat when people started writing these.

James Potter to Siriusis the ultimate ladies’ man [12:13 PM]: Petition to change the group name.Sirius Black: why though?James Potter: I feel like it’s inaccurate. I don’t want tolie to our adoring fans?Sirius Black: who do you think is reading our texts?Remus Lupin renamed the group If Sirius weren’t asexual, he still wouldn’t be the ultimate ladies’manPeter Pettigrew: bit wordy noRemus Lupin: Where’s the lie, though?Sirius Black: “still wouldn’t be”James Potter: I see no issues.Sirius Black: i feel attacked.

Lily Evans to James Potter [2:23 AM]: you should come here.James Potter [2:23 AM]: Okay, where?James Potter [2:30 AM]: Hello?

Remus Lupin to Jamesdoesn’t know we have a group message without him [2:46 AM]: Someone shuthim up.Sirius Black: i’ll hit him over the head with this bottle ofwhisky.Peter Pettigrew: Okay, but I feel like his confusion is validbecause she texted him at two AM and then never responded.Sirius Black: oh god. pete is sloshed. he’s texting withproper grammar.Remus Lupin: I’ll get the bucket.Peter Pettigrew: No, I’m not going to get sick. Peter Pettigrew [3:13 AM]: I’m just going to sit outside for a moment.Peter Pettigrew[3:17 AM]: Who’s trainers are outside?Sirius Black: jamesRemus Lupin: His favorite running trainers?Peter Pettigrew: Oh.Remus Lupin: Why do you ask?Peter Pettigrew: I may have just sicked up on them.Remus Lupin: I told you to take the bucket with you.Peter Pettigrew: I thought I’d be fine with some fresh air!Peter Pettigrew: Please don’t tell him.Sirius Black: we’re not snitches, Pete.

Sirius Black to Remus Lupin [3:21 AM]: think his favoritetrainers being ruined will make him shut up about Evans?Remus Lupin to Sirius Black [3:22 AM]: I can’t believe yousent him to check on Peter before I even read your text.Sirius Black to Remus Lupin [3:25 AM]: i don’t need urapproval.

James Potter to Peterowes me a new pair of trainers [10:56 AM]: I’m over her.Sirius Black: this again.Remus Lupin: I think this is a record. Fifth time this week,is it not?James Potter: No, I mean it this time.Sirius Black: you meant it last time too.Remus Lupin: And the time before that.James Potter: She thinks just because she’s hot she can textme whenever she feels like it, doesn’t even care if she wakes me up or not, andthen not even respond when I answer her.Sirius Black: you weren’t asleep?Sirius Black: we were trying to see who could drink the mostwhisky without sicking up.Remus Lupin: Pete lost, remember?James Potter: Yes. Hence the title of this group.James Potter: But that’s beside the point.Sirius Black: what’s the point?James Potter: In class just now, she didn’t even acknowledgethat she’d done anything.James Potter: It’s inconsiderate. And rude. And I won’t betoyed with anymore.Peter Pettigrew: u no whisky is my enemy its not my faultJames Potter renamed the group It’s always Pete’s faultPeter Pettigrew renamed the group im definitely not buying you new trainers nowJames Potter renamed the group Four is a crowdJames Potter removed Peter Pettigrew from the groupRemus Lupin added Peter Pettigrew to the groupRemus Lupin renamed the group Grow the fuck up; we are adultsSirius Black renamed the group Never grow upSirius Black removed Remus Lupin from the groupSirius Black: anarchy, the time is now.

James Potter to Lily Evans [3:45 PM]: I feel like if you’regoing to text someone at an indecent time, you should at least have the decencyto respond when they text back.Lily Evans [3:52 PM]: What are you talking about?Lily Evans [3:52 PM]: Oh God. Oh my God. I just realized. Idon’t remember sending that.Lily Evans [3:56 PM]: I was drunk and my friends had justbrought me home and I must have fallen asleep right after. I don’t remember anyof it.Lily Evans [4:05 PM]: Is this payback?James Potter [4:12 PM]: Sorry, just got out of class.James Potter [4:13 PM]: Okay, to be honest, I was going toleave you hanging, but then you confessed to drunk texting me what seems tohave been a booty call and I completely forgive you.Lily Evans [4:14 PM]: It was not a booty call.James Potter [4:14 PM]: How do you know?James Potter [4:14 PM]: You don’t even remember sending it.James Potter [4:14 PM]: Don’t be embarrassed. I was going tocome to you.Lily Evans [4:15 PM]: What were you even doing awake at sucha time?James Potter [4:16 PM]: Drinking with my friends.Lily Evans [4:16 PM]: You would have ditched your friendsfor me?James Potter [4:16 PM]: Without a doubt, yes.Lily Evans [4:17 PM]: You are a terrible liar.

James Potter added Lily Evans to Remus owes James a life debtSirius Black [4:18 PM]: interesting development.Lily Evans: Why have you done this, Potter?Remus Lupin: What’s happening?James Potter: Would I ditch you lot if Lily asked me to meether?Sirius Black: is this a trick?Sirius Black: i can’t decide if this is the ultimate power play or the biggest mistake of you life. Sirius Black: butSirius Black: without hesitation, yes.Remus Lupin: You have done on multiple occasions. Like thestudy group. You don’t do study groups, but when you found out she wasorganizing one, you literally left us in Burger King to go join.Sirius Black: you were half out the door the other night andyou didn’t know where to go.James Potter: That’s enough.Remus Lupin: At the beginning of the year you ditched us togo to that bar you hate because you heard she would be there.James Potter: NO REALLY THAT’S ENOUGH.Sirius Black: that was more us ditching him though.Sirius Black: he tried to make us go with him, and stillwent when we refused.Remus Lupin: How about the time she was ill and he ditched adifferent class to hand-deliver her his notes?Sirius Black: classic.James Potter: Please stop. I’ve seen the error of my ways.  Lily Evans has leftthe group.James Potter: I hate you.James Potter has leftthe group.Peter Pettigrew [4:23 PM]: i always miss all the fun

Remus Lupin to Lily Evans [12:23 PM]: Are you out of class?Lily Evans: Yes, why?Remus Lupin: Do you want to have lunch with me?Lily Evans: Are you going to talk up James?Remus Lupin: He’s really a great bloke.Remus Lupin: And he really does fancy you.Lily Evans: If your texts were true the other day, I believeyou.Remus Lupin: We weren’t lying.Lily Evans: Exaggerating, then.Remus Lupin: No.Remus Lupin: We may even have been downplaying how much hefancies you.Lily Evans [12:36 PM]: What’s this life debt you owe him?Remus Lupin: Meet me for lunch in the dining hall and I’lltell you all about it.Lily Evans: Fine.

Lily Evans to James Potter [12:13 AM]: hiJames Potter [12:18 AM]: hiLily Evans [12:19 AM]: Want to come over?James Potter [12:19 AM]: Is this a mean-spirited joke?Lily Evans [12:19 AM]: Flat 3.  12 Green Lane.

James Potter renamed the group Remus is the ultimate wingman [6:11 AM].Sirius Black [11:07]: okay but i’m asexual.Remus Lupin: You still cognitively understand sexual desire,though. You just don’t feel it.Sirius Black: i could be the ultimate wingman. if i tried.Peter Pettigrew: wait did u shag evansJames Potter: Even better, mates. I’ve got a date with heron Friday.Peter Pettigrew: how is that betterPeter Pettigrew: isnt shagging the goal of a dateSirius Black: even i know that.James Potter: Not with her, it’s not. The goal is anotherdate.Sirius Black: if you say so.Peter Pettigrew: but ur sayin u didn’t shag herJames Potter: We talked all night.Remus Lupin: Even I am doubtful.James Potter: Why?Remus Lupin: You forget I’m the one responsible for this.Remus Lupin: We talked a lot at lunch.James Potter: We talked all night.James Potter: That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Sirius Black to Lily Evans [7:10 PM]: quick question.Lily Evans: Okay?Sirius Black: did you shag james last night?Lily Evans: Why do you ask?Sirius Black: he claims you talked all night.Sirius Black: i find that hard to believe.

Lily Evans to James Potter [7:13 PM]: Did you tell yourfriends we didn’t have sex?James Potter: No. I didn’t tell them anything. Why?Lily Evans: Sirius texted me.Lily Evans sent animage.James Potter: Okay. So I said we talked all night and thatwe have a date on Friday, but I didn’t say that we didn’t sleep together.James Potter: I just didn’t say that we did.James Potter: I didn’t think you would appreciate me tellingpeople about it.James Potter: Was I wrong?

Lily Evans to Sirius Black [7:15 PM]: We talked all nightlong.Lily Evans: After we had sex.

Sirius Black renamed the group James is a lying slag.James Potter [7:31 PM]: What?Sirius Black sent animage.Sirius Black: still sticking to your story?Remus Lupin: Wow.Peter Pettigrew: congrats

James Potter to Lily Evans [7:32 PM]: Is it too soon to saythat I love you?Lily Evans: How about you just come shag me again?

#jily #jily texting au #marauders texts #texting au #social media au #jily social media au #james potter #lily evans #sirius black #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #jily fanfic #jily au #jily fic