uhhhhhhmazinggrace

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

9/16 - unsolicited memories

There’s a blank bit of space between what I know and what I remember. Everything happened in that blank bit of space. Sometimes I think I can recall the feeling of shockwaves rippling through my bones, but it’s always in the most inconvenient moment, when I’m the one behind the wheel and the rest of the road is full of nothing but my unsolicited memories. I take a shaky breath and push them back.

-

i was in a car accident back when i was 15, & sometimes (almost exactly 3 years later) when i’m driving i still get cute lil *trauma flashbacks* 

#poems #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #we love trauma #i'm a good driver i swear

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/15 - a snapshot of the daily grind

My toes crunch under the comforter. I heave a dry cough from bleary lungs until there’s nothing left to expel.

Hardwood floor and the smell of once-fresh coffee permeate my soul, like they were meant to be there. Radio announcers blabber from an out-of-earshot kitchen.

#poems #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #daily grind babey #we love crunchy toes

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/14 - the letter ‘p’; use a thesaurus, encyclopedia or dictionary!

i stand, arms out, poised, dead staring in the empty pasture. i may be alone, but i’m not free, the pressure of space screaming down my neck. she pierces my mind with her shrill precision, and i wince at the sting.

#poems #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #p #lmao

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/13 - rhymes with spines

i would ask you to bend over backwards, snap in half like a twig when i step on your spine, and i know you’d contort gladly just to see my smile.

-

it took me a while but i finally got out of my rut and back on my writing “grind” ew i hate that word :)

#poems #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i need to be held accountable hjdsfdfh #oops

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/12 - sickly sweet and sour citrus

sour guilt fills my tongue not too different from the burning tang of bile and i claw at my mouth desperate to taste that sweet acidic fire i get with orange when it’s covered in chocolate and pulls me deep

-

been havin a sexuality crisis for the last couple of days & i wrote this poem ab feeling like a fraud :/ newly coming out to u all as a lesbian!! (i prev identified as pan, then queer.) these last six months have been very self reflective & i’m so happy to say it feels like i have a huge weight off my chest :)

#poems #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #lesbianism!! #i'm gay luvs

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/11 - your surrealist blur

there is familiarity in knowing what’s coming and still knowing nothing. the silence of stuff without words pierces my heart; not in a bad way, but it reminds me of a time when i could sit at a table for a whole day and not think about next week. i’ve decided i don’t miss those hours and still i ache for something simpler and more complex than this beige sheet that covers my head and muffles my gentle screams. the voice in my head is no voice of mine when i don’t hear voices in my ears. she isn’t real and doesn’t tell me what to say. the rumble of my fingers refills the tension in my spine and i grip it with both hands, and i wring it out like our kitchen cloth after i wipe down the counters. water seeps between my fingers, not water, but water; it isn’t blood, but it’s not-water water, the stuff between the bones, between the muscle and fat and skin, it’s there and it fills the space and now it leaks. i feel it dripping down my tailbone and my legs and my feet and i’m standing in it. the silence of energy and sound is softly gripping my shoulders with its tiny hands.

-

i’ve never written anything like this before and i have to be honest. i LOVE it. i went into a trance and just typed words as i thought them; this took the absolute least amount of thought i’ve ever put into anything i’ve written. it was so much fun, and surprisingly cathartic. not my standard poetry format, considering it’s just a paragraph, but i think anything can be poetry if that’s what it is to the author, and i’m excited to be trying new styles! :)

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #surrealism #surrealist poetry

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/10 - “Winter is an etching; spring a watercolour; summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all” - Stanley Horowitz, on seasons

Mother keeps her pen poised. She sketches out each day with painful precision. Her repetition can be excused; Mother doesn’t have an endless mind. And if it was mentioned, she would giggle and draw up a sprout in midwinter.

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #we love nature

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/09 - sensible profanities

the worst you could call me is a fraud.

that’s not to say it would be a lie but damn would it hurt.

you know i have no mastery of the words i spew. i fumble my way through the muck and hold on too tightly to whatever i can grasp in a desperate attempt to convince you otherwise.

you are my best friend and my worst fucking enemy. i was lost before you, but now that i’ve found you, i can’t seem to let you go.

forget this. i’m ready to fight.

-

i had a whole idea for this poem like three days before i wrote it and of course i didn’t write it down, so this isn’t what it was supposed to be. either way, i’m glad i wrote it. and yes, this is a poem about how i hate the stagnancy of my recent poems

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i was angry #this is very self aware of me

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/08 - something broken, something blue

if you tell me i’m not selfish then maybe this stupid pit in my stomach will drown itself in my intestines

don’t hold my hand but whisper your soul into my ear just to remind me that i’m trying

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i hate money and broken bones

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/07 - a list for the lost

close your eyes, baby. let me braid your hair. i’ll tell you about the fairies i’ve met and the adventures i’ve had, dancing through the tree roots and the weed stalks.

my love, take a breath. when you hold it, let a sprinkle of that magic settle in your lungs.

they have found you.

-

as you can see, i’m interpreting these prompts very loosely lol

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i want to give someone a hug #fairies

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/06 - parentheses

i’m quite positive i’ve never loved anyone, but god do i feel something for you. i think i always have and always will, even when i tell her (and, by extension, myself), “no, i’m definitely over it.”

something about you is special. i know we aren’t meant to be and i know you will never look at me and think the thoughts i think of you. but you smile at me with a glow in your eyes that i can never place and i realize i still want to kiss your stupid lips. (who let me write that sestina anyway?)

everything i’ll continue to dream about you will always be an aside. i got my moment, and it’s passed, and we’re carrying on like it was nothing. (although, to be fair, i probably never had a real chance.)

maybe i’m too content to live my life dreaming after you. but i’d rather be yearning and alone than ever let you know what i never stopped feeling.

-

this is the third poem i’ve written about this straight girl i’ve been not-in-love with for like four years! yikes! but she’s provided me with a lot of poetic inspiration and i do love her as she’s one of my closest friends. :) <3

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i'm gay #for a straight girl #and it hurts

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/05 - wunderkammer

I sit on a stool in the dining room and eat my scrambled eggs and toast while Mom unloads box after box of miscellaneous kitchenware. This house, empty for no more than a few days between dwellers, is gently filled with things I have known as ours for my whole life. Still, I can’t help the feeling that I am an insider-outsider in this not-yet-home.

-

this feels incomplete. oh well. it’s what i wrote that day and it’s what i’m posting. no editing until next month!

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #i moved and wrote a poem about it #also i love scrambled eggs

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/04 - a kingdom for a coin

look at you: you’ve got the whole world in the palm of your coppernickelzinc hand (toss it, just for kicks; i call heads), but you stay stuck so tragically in the deep, dark depths of my lonely jeans pocket, clinging to the frayed inner-denim and kissing down my thigh.

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #we love coins

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/03 - a poem of 100 words exactly

you and i became distant long ago. i know this because i was comfortable enough to say goodbye to you just recently.

before we started to drift apart, there was a time when you held my hand and whispered words of encouragement in my ear and told me i was strong enough.

i could feel you leaving before i was ready to let you go.

even after we parted, i felt indebted to you. now that i’ve seen your true colors, now that you’ve bared yourself to the world, i can’t help but be so disgusted.

consider my debt paid.

-

wrote this shitty lil thing about tyler joseph and his stupid platform tweet! :)))

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #fuck tyler joseph #teehee

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/02 - a poem based on page 50 of the closest book

of course, the first of anything is quite crude. oh, how you labor day and night, fighting for your vision, for the outcome to be such an uninspiring, simple creature. but when you wake up tomorrow, furious with yourself at your embarrassing performance, you have already vowed to be greater than that mess.

-

the book was “the great bridge” by david mccullough if anyone actually cares lol

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #idk bridges

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

09/01 - fragile bonds

i’m clinging onto you so desperately, and i cannot seem to grasp the nature of your soul. my heart (how it yearns) is finely fragmented, so that it fits into the palm of your hand, and you have plucked it apart into shreds and left them dangling from a spiderweb.

-

this september i am attempting to write poetry every day (but we know how that usually goes don’t we) and i’m surprised to say i’m a week in and it’s already going well! i’ve been easy on myself but i’m glad to say i don’t hate the majority of what i’ve already written. i wasn’t going to post these b/c when i have in the past i get really worried about people thinking i’m a bad poet, but nobody reads these anyways so now that it’s been a whole week i figure fuck it! i’m gonna post them! b/c otherwise i feel like i’m writing into a void and that’s just no fun.

#poem #poetry #30 day poetry challenge #30 day challenge #september poetry challenge #college is overwhelming #so i'm writing poetry to forget about it

[uhhhhhhmazinggrace]

Mount Holyoke students, circa 1887

A studio shot of Kitty Ely class of 1887 (left) and Helen Emory class of 1889.