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willowbelle · 2 months

Text

Not a Chance

Zoro & Jealousy + Possessiveness

per this request!

❤︎ roronoa zoro x fem reader ❤︎

༉‧₊˚✧ (nsfw, afab!reader, 18+ only) ༉‧₊˚✧

cw: dom! zoro, jealous zoro, very possessive zoro, semi-public sex, wall sex, arm pinning, rough sex, loud sex, lots of dirty talk (im so fr i cooked w the dirty talk on this one), "be loud, let them hear you." type :^)

summary: zoro & reader are privately dating. zoro gets very jealous when he sees law & kidd flirting with reader at a party. zoro confronts the men. zoro aims to show everyone who reader belongs to ;)

word count: ~3,200

tagging: @bby-deerling @eelnoise @3v37773 @laylaloves-ed @shamblespirate @lowkeycasanova @maddddstuff @fanaticsnail

Not a Chance

As the celebratory atmosphere envelops the aftermath of the victorious battle in Wano, you find yourself nestled in a corner of the bustling banquet hall, the glow of lanterns casting warm hues over the scene.

It's a moment of triumph, shared among allies turned friends, but for you and Roronoa Zoro, it holds an added layer of complexity.

You and Zoro had been quietly dating, your relationship concealed beneath the veil of secrecy that he prefered. His private nature means that your romance remains known only to a select few, a fact that both frustrates and intrigues you.

But in moments like these, surrounded by fellow pirates and allies, the clandestine nature of your connection is put to the test.

Zoro, with his stoic demeanor and unwavering dedication to his goals, is a man of few words when it comes to matters of the heart. Yet, beneath his tough exterior, lies a depth of emotion that he reserves solely for you.

In quiet moments, away from the prying eyes of others, he lets his guard down, revealing glimpses of vulnerability that few are privileged to witness.

For you, being with Zoro is much like navigating uncharted waters, thrilling, yet… unpredictable.

His fierce loyalty and unwavering support are constants in your life, grounding you amidst the chaos of the pirate world. And while his private nature sometimes leaves you craving more, you cherish the moments when he lets you in, when he allows himself to be vulnerable with you.

In the hidden corners of The Sunny, away from the eyes of your crewmates, you and Zoro share stolen glances and intimate moments that are reserved solely for each other.

The storage closets, nestled deep within the bowels of the ship, become your sanctuaries of intimacy. There, amidst the shadows and whispers of the vessel, you and Zoro find solace in stolen moments of closeness.

The dim light filtering through the cracks in the door paints a soft glow upon your faces as you press together in the confined space, your breath mingling in the air.

The rhythmic sound of The Sunny’s hull against the waves provides a soothing backdrop to your whispered intimacy; the thrusts of his hips, your moans against his neck. In those hidden moments, you bare your souls to each other; sharing fears, dreams, desires, and everything in between.

----

Amidst the revelry, you notice glances and subtle gestures from some of the other pirates, members of both the Heart Pirates and Kidd Pirates, their intentions not entirely innocent.

Their flirtations and insinuations don't go unnoticed, and although you remain steadfast in your commitment to Zoro, a part of you can't help but feel flattered by the attention.

As the night progresses, Zoro's demeanor shifts. His usually composed facade cracks, replaced by a simmering undercurrent of jealousy and possessiveness. You can feel his gaze burning into you from across the room, his grip tightening imperceptibly around his sake cup.

It's Law who approaches first, a smirk playing at the corners of his lips as he engages you in conversation, his proximity closer than necessary.

"Enjoying the festivities, y/n?" Law asks, his voice laced with playful intent.

"Absolutely," you reply, offering a polite smile, though you can't shake the sense of unease at Zoro's watchful stare.

Zoro's reaction is instantaneous, his jaw clenched as he moves to intercede, positioning himself subtly between you and Law, a silent declaration of his claim.

Next comes Killer, his playful banter veering into suggestive territory, earning a low growl of warning from Zoro.

"You're quite the charmer, aren't you?" Killer remarks, his tone teasing.

Zoro's response is a terse nod, his gaze never leaving Killer's masked face.

Even Kidd, usually brash and unbothered by such matters, can't resist throwing a teasing comment your way, only to be met with a glare sharp enough to cut through steel.

"Careful, y/n, you might give poor Zoro here a heart attack," Kidd jokes, flashing a mischievous smirk.

----

As the flirtations from the other pirates intensify, you feel a mixture of discomfort ripple through you. Seeking a moment of respite, you excuse yourself from the crowd and make your way to a quieter corner of the banquet hall where you spot Nami, your best friend and trusted crewmate, engaged in conversation with Robin.

"Nami," you greet, relief flooding your voice as you join them. "Mind if I steal you away for a moment?"

Nami turns to you with a knowing smile, her sharp eyes taking in your slightly flustered expression. "Of course, y/n," she replies, motioning for you to sit beside her.

As you settle in next to her, you can't help but vent your frustrations. "It's like they're all coming out of the woodwork tonight," you mutter, casting a glance towards where the other pirates are still making advances.

Nami's lips quirk into a sympathetic smile. "Well, you are quite the catch, aren't you?" she teases and winks, nudging you playfully with her elbow.

You can't help but chuckle at her comment, grateful for her light-hearted approach to the situation. "I suppose," you reply with a hint of self-deprecation. "But it's not like I'm interested in any of them."

Nami's expression softens, her gaze meeting yours with a look of understanding. "I know, sweetie," she says gently. "But sometimes it's nice to feel admired, even if it's from a distance."

You nod, grateful for Nami's insight. Despite the unwanted attention, her words offer a sense of validation that eases the tension coiling in your stomach. "Thanks, Nami," you say sincerely, reaching out to squeeze her hand.

"Anytime," Nami replies, returning the gesture with a reassuring smile. "Just remember, you've got Zoro watching over you like a hawk. No one stands a chance against that."

----

As the night wears on and the tensions grow, Zoro can't ignore the prickling sense of unease that gnaws at him.

His jealousy simmers just beneath the surface, a volatile mix of protectiveness and possessiveness that threatens to boil over at any moment.

And suddenly, it does; boils over, floods his skull, and pushes him to drastic measures.

Spotting Law and Kidd engaged in conversation across the room, Zoro's steps grow purposeful as he makes his way towards them, his jaw clenched with barely contained anger.

"Law, Kidd," Zoro's voice is low and menacing as he approaches, his gaze piercing through them with a ferocity that makes even the most seasoned pirates flinch.

Law and Kidd turn to face him, their expressions shifting from casual to wary as they take in Zoro's imposing figure.

"What do you want, Marimo?" Kidd retorts, his tone laced with defiance.

Zoro's eyes narrow dangerously, his temper flaring as he squares his shoulders. "I saw the way you were looking at her," he growls, his voice a low rumble that reverberates with barely contained fury.

Law raises an eyebrow, his expression unreadable. "And what if we were?" he replies coolly, though a flicker of amusement dances in his eyes.

Zoro's grip tightens on the hilt of his swords, his knuckles whitening with the effort to restrain himself. "She's off-limits," he spits, "If you know what's good for you, you'll keep your distance."

Law and Kidd exchange a glance, a silent communication passing between them before Law finally speaks, his tone calm but tinged with a hint of amusement. "Relax, swordsman," he says, raising his hands in a placating gesture. "We were just having a friendly conversation."

But Zoro isn't appeased, his anger still simmering beneath the surface as he glares at them both. "Just remember," he warns, his voice low and dangerous. "She's mine."

As you remain seated with Nami, the conversation ebbs and flows between lighthearted banter and moments of quiet introspection. Despite the festive atmosphere surrounding you, a part of your mind remains preoccupied with the tension that seems to linger in the air, like a storm brewing on the horizon.

Nami, ever perceptive, notices the furrow in your brow and the unease that flickers in your eyes. "Is everything alright, y/n?" she asks, her voice laced with concern as she places a reassuring hand on your arm.

You offer her a small smile, grateful for her steadfast presence. "Yeah, I think so," you reply, though the uncertainty still lingers at the edges of your consciousness.

But before you can delve further into the matter, a commotion breaks out across the room, drawing your attention. You and Nami exchange a curious glance before turning to see Zoro engaged in a heated confrontation with Law and Kidd.

Concern etches itself into your features as you watch the scene unfold, the tension in the air palpable even from a distance. "What's going on?" Nami murmurs, her voice barely above a whisper as she leans in closer, her eyes fixed on the unfolding confrontation.

You shake your head, unsure of what has sparked the conflict but feeling a sense of urgency to intervene. "I'm not sure, but I think we should go check on them," you reply, already rising from your seat.

Nami nods in agreement, her expression mirroring your own concern as she follows suit. Together, you make your way through the crowd, weaving between revelers until you reach the center of the commotion.

As you approach Zoro standing with Law and Kidd, you notice the tension radiating from him like a palpable force. His jaw is clenched, his eyes narrowed with simmering anger as he exchanges words with the other pirates.

It's a side of him you haven't seen before, raw and unfiltered, publicly displaying his love for you.

"Zoro," you say softly, reaching out to touch his arm, hoping to diffuse the tension.

He glances at you, his expression still dark with irritation. "Not now," he mutters tersely, his tone leaving no room for argument.

But you aren't deterred. You know that letting his anger consume him won't solve anything. With a gentle tug on his arm, you urge him to step away from the heated exchange.

"Come on, let's go somewhere quieter," you say, your voice laced with concern.

Zoro hesitates for a moment, his gaze flickering between you and the other pirates. Then, with a resigned sigh, he nods and allows you to lead him away from the confrontation.

----

As you walk, you feel the tension slowly dissipating from Zoro's frame, replaced by a sense of calmness. With each step, the anger that had gripped him begins to fade, replaced by the warmth of your presence beside him.

Finally finding a secluded corner of the banquet hall, you turn to face Zoro, your eyes searching his for any lingering traces of anger. "Are you okay?"

But before Zoro can respond, he takes your hand in his with a determined grip, his expression unreadable yet intense. Without a word, he begins to lead you away from the crowded hall, his steps purposeful and unwavering.

Confusion mingles with curiosity as you follow him, your heart pounding with anticipation.

As you reach the door of the storage, you feel blood rush to your face. The two of you only ever go here for one thing.

Zoro turns to you, his gaze locking with yours in a silent yet powerful exchange. Without a word, he pushes open the door and pulls you inside, making your eyes adjust to the dim lighting.

With a gentle yet urgent insistence, Zoro presses you against the wall, his lips finding yours in a hungry, desperate kiss.

“Mmm!” you whimper against his lips, taken off guard by the suddenness of his advances.

There is a rawness to his touch, a primal need that leaves you breathless.

In that moment, as you lose yourselves in the heat of the moment, you realize that words are no longer necessary. Zoro's actions speak volumes, baring his emotions in a way that words never could.

As Zoro's lips trail down your neck, igniting a fiery trail of desire, you let out a low moan of pleasure.

"Fuck," you whisper, your voice barely above a breath as you arch into his touch, your hands tangling in his hair.

He groans against your flesh, causing goosebumps to bud all over your needy skin as he continues his fervent exploration.

In a sudden burst of intensity, Zoro's hands find the hem of your shirt, his fingers gripping the fabric with a primal need. With a swift motion, he tears the fabric away, baring your skin to his hungry gaze.

"Zoro-!" you gasp, a rush of adrenaline coursing through you as you feel the cool air against your exposed flesh, your heart pounding in your chest.

He looks up at you, his eyes dark with desire, a feral hunger burning within them. "I need you," he murmurs, his voice husky with longing.

“Please,” you whine, your voice a breathless plea as he trails kisses down your chest.

As Zoro's lips continue their tantalizing journey across your skin, your senses reel with desire. You allow your head to lull back, shutting your eyes and letting your mouth hang slack as you savor each and every touch.

His hardworking, calloused hands explore your body with a newfound possessiveness, and it makes you feel small; he owns you and you like it.

With trembling hands, you reach for Zoro's shirt, eager to feel the warmth of his skin against yours. With practiced ease, he shrugs off the garment, revealing the defined muscles beneath.

The sight of him, bare-chested and consumed with passion, sends a thrill coursing through you. Without hesitation, you press your body against his, reveling in the heat that radiates between you.

Lost in the heat of the moment, you abandon all inhibitions, giving in to the primal urges that drive you both. Your hands roam freely over his taut muscles, tracing the lines of his scars as you explore every inch of him.

As your fingers dance over his scars, Zoro's breath hitches, his dark eyes locking with yours in a silent exchange of desire.

"You're mine," he murmurs huskily, his voice rough with emotion.

A shiver runs down your spine at his possessive declaration, but instead of fear, it awakens something entirely different within you. "Yours," you whisper back.

With a hungry growl, Zoro captures your lips in a searing kiss, his hands gripping your waist tightly, possessively.

"Never forget it," he breathes against your skin, his lips trailing down your neck.

You arch into his touch, gasping as pleasure courses through your veins. "I won't," you promise, your words melting into a moan as he trails kisses along your collarbone.

Zoro's hands slide down to the hem of your skirt, lifting it up with a hunger that matches the intensity of his gaze. As he exposes more of your skin, his breath catches at the sight; your trembling thighs, your wet panties.

“All this?” he smirks, tsking, “All because I got a little possessive?”

“M-mhm,” you whine weakly, shaking beneath his touch.

With a low growl, Zoro grips your thigh, lifting it up to press his crotch against yours. The heat of his body sends electric currents coursing through you, and you can feel the tension building with each heartbeat.

Your hands clutch at his shoulders, fingers digging into the muscles beneath his skin as you pull him closer, craving more of his touch. "Zoro," you gasp his name, your voice a plea and a prayer all at once.

His lips find yours once more, claiming you with a hunger that leaves you dizzy with need. With each movement, each touch, you feel yourself surrendering completely to his dominance.

Zoro’s calloused fingertips trail down your body to meet your slit, making you gasp softly at the sensation.

He smirks, hooking his fingers beneath the soaked fabric and tugging it aside.

In the same breath, he tugs his pants and boxers down, just enough to remove his cock, rock-hard and throbbing in his grasp.

He leans forwards, the tip of his cock meeting your leaking slit with a gentle nudge. You suck your bottom lip between your teeth to stifle a moan, reaching around to dig your fingernails into the muscular flesh of the swordsman’s back.

“Yeah?’ he groans smugly, pressing his lips to your neck, “Ready for me?” he questions, his words hot against your flesh.

“Y-Yes, Zoro,” you plead, your tone coming out whinier than anticipated, “Please-”

“Please?” he chuckles against your skin, the dark tone of his voice causing goosebumps to erupt all over your body, “Please what?” he presses, continuing to guide his thick tip up and down your aching cunt.

You abandon all dignity, the desire for him to just fuck you already overpowering any morsel of self-respect you once contained.

“Please fuck me, Zoro,” you beg, “Show me just how much I belong to you.”

With a low, primal growl, Zoro's grip tightens on your thigh, his eyes dark with hunger as he positions himself at your entrance.

“That’s it, good girl,” he smirks.

Without another word, he thrusts into you with a force that steals your breath away, claiming you completely in a single, powerful motion.

“Zoro-!” you cry out, raking your nails down his back. The sudden bump of his tip to your cervix causes your head to grow fuzzy, and you pathetically attempt to stifle your moans with a shaky hand to your mouth.

With a devilish smirk, Zoro's thrusts intensify, his eyes gleaming with mischief as he hears your attempts to stifle your moans. He grabs your hand away from your mouth and pins it above your head,

"No," he growls, his voice low and commanding, "Let them hear you. Let them know who you belong to."

His words send a shiver down your spine, and without hesitation, you obey, letting out a loud, unabashed moan that fills the room with the sound of your pleasure. With each thrust, each gasp, you make it known to anyone within earshot that you are his.

The sensation of him filling you completely makes your limbs go numb with pleasure, igniting a fire that burns hotter with each deep, primal thrust. Your nails dig into his back as you cling to him, lost in a haze of ecstasy.

“Fuck, Zoro,” you whine, tears of pleasure flowing down your cheeks as he pounds you into the wall.

Zoro's movements are relentless, driving you both to the edge of sanity as he takes you with a possessiveness that leaves no room for doubt.

You continue to moan loudly for the man you have to thank for your pleasure, making him smirk and double his efforts, the rhythmic sound of your bodies slapping together hardly masking your cries.

"That’s it,” the swordsman chuckles, “No need to be shy," he teases, his voice dripping with amusement, "Let them all know who's making you scream like that."

And as you let out another loud, unrestrained moan, Zoro leans in close, his lips brushing against your ear as he adds with a playful grin,

"After all, it's not every day they get to witness the full extent of my skills."

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islandofsages · 3 months

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HEYY!! I love your writing from what i've read and i was wondering if i could ask for a gn reader (yuu) teaching the housewardens about like classic fandom lore- like imagine them turning into matpat to explain fnaf and undertale!! 😭😭 feel free to not do this and have a good day!! Thanks :D

characters: housewardens x gn!yuu

tags: platonic, fluff, crack kinda, imagines format

warnings: swearing

author's notes: SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG also all the fandoms mentioned here are all fandoms ive been in at some point :D fun times mhm

Riddle Rosehearts

He knows you’re very passionate about fandom culture but you never really had the chance to infodump about it to him

Until one day, you drop by Heartslabyul for a leisurely visit, when you see a not-so-clearly distressed Riddle sitting in the lounge

Not-so-clearly meaning he’s holding a teacup in his hand yet not drinking it, eyes closed as if he’s holding in all his emotions

You grow worried at this sight and slide next to him on the couch where he is seated, hoping you can help alleviate some of that stress

He sees you and he allows himself a sigh, then musters up a smile for you. He greets you and you cut straight to the point - can you help him with anything?

He releases a second sigh and shakes his head, telling you he only needs some sort of distraction. He just had a long day and needs to take his mind off things

You take a second to think of things that you can distract him with – that’s when a lightbulb goes off in your head. This is a prime opportunity for you

“Okay, I’m guessing you haven’t heard of Five Nights at Freddy’s since it’s a franchise from my world and all but the lore is crazy. So it starts like this…”

He wasn’t expecting to be paying much attention to the contents of what you’re saying but sooner or later, he ends up leaning towards you with his hand cupping his chin, mouth slightly agape at the story you’re telling

This inspires you to dump even more information about the media somehow at the rate that you’re going

By the end of it, he’s completely forgotten what he was so worried about. His head is full of creepy pizzerias for kids and haunted animatronics

He ends up having some trouble sleeping that night though. He’ll get you for that later.

Leona Kingscholar

He won’t lie, your interest in fandoms is too reminiscent of Idia for him – he doesn’t admit this to you obviously, since he hasn’t had the chance to

But on one particularly boring day, you decide to skip class with him and he lets you tag along for the hell of it

In the span of three seconds, he’s already off in dreamland. Sometimes you wish you had such a skill

Since you have nothing better to do and he’s way too deep in his sleep to even care anyway, you start rambling to yourself and a slumbering Leona

“Well, I’ve been thinking a lot about Undertale lately so I need to dump it all somewhere. So basically you play as this kid…”

Little do you know halfway through his nap, he wakes up from how much you’re talking. At first, he’s annoyed by your yapping but then he grows interest in what you’re saying

He’s almost tempted to try that game for himself and almost disappointed that it’s not available in Twisted Wonderland. Emphasis on almost.

When you’re done rambling, that’s when he stretches his arms over his head and yawn, commenting how noisy you were

You shrug it off. You're used to him complaining about you yapping instead of napping alongside him

…But then he asks you to tell him more about Undertale, if there's any more information you’re keeping from him out of the kindness of your heart

You smile smugly at this and his expression seems to say “don't make me regret asking” but oh, you definitely will make him regret even being friends with you in the first place

Needless to say, regrets were not the only thing he held at the end of that day.

Azul Ashengrotto

Similar to Leona, your fixation on fandom culture reminds him too much of Idia. not that that’s necessarily a bad thing - it’s more of an observation

And he gets more than an observation when you get the chance to show him what you’re made of: useless fandom culture and gaming knowledge

Speaking of Idia, he goes to you as a last resort to ask you to help him understand whatever the hell Idia’s talking about

You don’t know too much about Twisted Wonderland’s fandom culture just yet but when Azul explains the premise of a certain game and its fandom, it gives you an idea

“Sounds pretty similar to Yandere Simulator. Ooh, that one has a lot of history. Let me tell you about it…”

Unfortunately for him, he ended up unlocking your geekiness instead of having you address the things he was confused with

But at least your story makes it a bit easier to understand? He’s yet to decide that really but at least it sounds like you’re taking his lack of slang knowledge into consideration

Your infodump really gripped his attention though - it’s interesting to know another side of human culture, even if it’s not the humans of Twisted Wonderland

He would nod understandingly (or at least, politely) and thank you and your geekiness

He relays your story to Idia and finds it intriguing how similar fandom culture is in both Twisted Wonderland and your world

He would invite you to Board Game Club meetings so that you can rave and find out more about Twisted Wonderland’s fandom culture with Idia

He’d realize that was a big mistake and he may or may not have created the nerdiest pair in the world - but you guys are his nerdiest pair in the world.

Kalim Al-Asim

He’s very curious about fandom culture - he doesn’t know too much about it nor anyone who knows a lot about it so almost all the fandom information in his head are from you

He really wants to know more!!! So of course that warrants a hangout session fabricated as a study session to get Jamil’s stamp of approval

So there you are in his room, books laid out in front of the two of you but most importantly, a laptop

You two watch about a dozen videos on Twisted Wonderland’s fandom culture and as you absorb all the very-much-useful information, you sneak in tidbits from the culture of your world

“This one in particular is reminiscent of Danganronpa. Man, that one was a wild ride…”

It’s exciting to be able to talk about it with someone you trust wholeheartedly, especially Kalim, whom you know wouldn’t be so judging

He only nods in understanding at every point you made, his eyes sparkling with all the curiosity in his body

You were on your thirteenth video when you two are interrupted by a rap on the door and an unfortunately-familiar voice

So obviously you and your bestie hurriedly rush to close all the tabs on your laptop and open up something more academically-inclined

Which is obviously a…dictionary site

Jamil blinks twice at this, says nothing (but probably noting how it makes sense for you guys since you two are bumbling idiots) and walks away

If there’s any dictionary being read that day, it’d be a dictionary of fandom terminology, that’s for sure.

Vil Schoenheit

He doesn’t know too much about it - and doesn’t bother to learn much about it since he has better things to do - but since it’s you, he tries his best to be a good listener

The two of you sit down in the courtyard one day, the chirping of birds and rustling of leaves music to your ears; beauty truly is everywhere around you when you’re next to him

He’s talking about something. You’re not sure what because you’re entranced by the way his hair hangs above his eyes so elegantly. He notices this and calls you out for it

You shrug and excuse how you can’t help it - he’s like a dating simulator love interest in the real. He asks you what you mean by this. Now’s your chance to shine!

“Hmm, you know, something like Mystic Messenger? Hehe, let me tell you a bit about it…”

Unluckily for him, your “a bit” turns out to be a four-hour long ramble about the aforementioned dating simulator a little too reminiscent of Rook for his liking too

Despite his reservations, he really did enjoy hearing you talk so passionately about your interest; it’s a bonus that the topic itself is interesting

He tells you he wouldn’t mind trying out the game or at least finding out more about it though unfortunately it’s not available in Twisted Wonderland

You share his shame - until he says he’ll pitch the concept of the game to some authorities he know and perhaps make it a reality

Sorry, he’s going to what now?

You’re a little shaken. Sometimes you forget he’s a world-class model, despite his looks and mannerisms. You save your nerves for if a Twisted Wonderland version of Mystic Messenger actually ends up happening

He thanks you for enlightening him about fandom and video gaming culture. You use this as a cue to add another four hours of ranting about V’s route in the game.

Idia Shroud

You’re another victim for him to taint… or so he thought. You’re more of an ally than a victim at this point, considering how nerdy you are

He’d dump fandom lore on you and you’d reciprocate it right back. He’s genuinely so impressed with your knowledge, even if they differ by some degree due to being from different worlds

He gets more impressed when you pull up with knowledge about Twisted Wonderland’s fandom culture like damn, you really brushed up on your talking points already

Friendly rivalry aside, he really does enjoy talking about fandom culture with you and hearing about the things from your world - every story you tell adds a little color into his world

One day, the two of you are leaning on each other, on your phones because of course you are, even if you two are friends, talking still isn’t Idia’s strong suit

That’s when you blurt it out–

“Hey, wanna hear about this game called Persona? It’s a turn-based RPG and…”

Regardless of his response to your question, you ended up babbling away either way. It’s how conversations start between the two of you

You’re speaking so fast, he would have mistaken you for a rapper - or a doppelganger of himself even

Consider him entertained - he finds himself smiling by the end of your yapping and intrigued by your story

He then obviously starts to relate it to something from Twisted Wonderland, passing the listener baton to you

You don’t mind – you can stay there for hours and hours, just going back and forth with your fellow nerdy-ass friend.

Malleus Draconia

This man barely knows how to use a smartphone so you had to be a little patient with him when guiding him through the fandom culture trenches

He’s happy that you trust and cherish him enough to talk about your interests with no reservations or shame – and the feeling is mutual

On a certain weekend, the two of you are hanging out as usual. Chatting as friends would do

You don’t know why but the conversation reminded you of a certain fandom

“It’s kinda like Genshin’s community, I guess. They’re a riot, let me tell you that.”

Oh? What’s a Genshin and why is its community a riot?

You’re glad he asked – because you’ve prepared a 100-slide presentation on the history of the game and its fans

He asks you why and how did you find the time to make that. You tell him to shut up and that it doesn’t matter, he just needs to listen to you

You start and it feels like you’ll never stop – there’s just so much to say and Malleus has so much time in the world

Seeing his reactions to certain events makes you crack up and at times, you’d laugh at his shocked expressions (or sigh exhaustively, depending on the event you’re explaining)

When you finally stop, he gives you a one-man standing ovation. You blush a little at the attention and unexpected reaction but you appreciate his sentiment nonetheless. He tells you that your presentation has been very informative for him

You’re relieved to have been able to get that off your chest… and Malleus is more than ecstatic to relay the information to everyone he’s ever known. You obviously pretend that you had no involvement in his sudden investment of a game from another world.

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steddieas-shegoes · 2 months

Text

my body is my weapon

for @steddieholidaydrabbles popup event for 'spring'

rated t | 734 words | cw: canon-typical violence, mild blood | tags: self-sacrificing steve, hurt/comfort, getting together

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Steve was good at this, springing up from nowhere, nail bat in hand, ready to protect his found family. It was a natural instinct at this point.

Didn't matter the cost, didn't matter if he was the only one willing. If Vecna wanted to take someone, he could take him.

With Eddie barely recovered from his first bout in the Upside Down, Max still in a coma, and Lucas being glued to her side to make sure nothing happened, the crew was a little short staffed.

But Steve would make sure that didn't matter.

They prepared as much as they could, which wasn't nearly as much as they should. Vecna was strong, stronger than they expected him to be, and his creatures were wearing them down before he even came to fight.

But El was stronger.

As Steve lay on the ground, bleeding more than he ever had before, certain of his life being over, he thought about every time he'd put himself in front of the kids.

He had no regrets, but he wished it could've played out differently.

Hands on his shoulders made him open his eyes, but his vision was blurry and his head was pounding. Probably another concussion.

"You don't get to die."

Eddie? How was he- why was he here? He was supposed to stay topside to call for help the moment he was signaled.

Maybe Steve was delusional in his last moments. Eddie mentioned that he was hallucinating from the blood loss when it happened to him.

"Steve. Keep your eyes on me," Eddie's voice was panicked. "God, you always have to spring into action, huh? Can't wait ten seconds for someone to help."

"Ed."

Steve could make out the outline of his head, but not details.

"'S what 'm good for."

"That's bullshit."

And then everything went black.

Steve's only thought was that he wished the last things he heard weren't those words.

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

His head was pounding again, and the incessant beeping surrounding him wasn't helping.

"If it hurts, don't open your eyes."

The voice sounded an awful lot like Eddie.

"Mm. Thirsty," Steve whispered.

"I got you," Eddie's hand was on the back of his head, gently lifting, while the other must have been holding a cup of room temperature water to his lips. "Little sips."

Steve didn't think much of what was going on. If this was the afterlife, at least he had someone taking care of him.

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

The next time Steve was conscious, his head wasn't pounding and he could tell the room around him was dark.

He opened his eyes, slowly taking in the hospital room.

Eddie was asleep in the chair next to his bed.

He looked uncomfortable.

Steve tried to shift onto his side, but a lightning bolt of pain shot from his shoulder to his knee, and he couldn't quite contain the gasp he let out.

Eddie's eyes shot open as he stood from the chair, leaning over Steve to see what hurt.

"Shit, are you okay?" Eddie asked as his hands hovered over Steve's heavily wrapped up body.

"Mhm. Jus' hurt," Steve managed to say, his voice raspy. "How?"

"How long have you been out?" Eddie waited for Steve's nod to continue. "First bit was about three days, then you woke up for a minute yesterday."

"Alive?"

"Yeah," Eddie's tone shifted to something more serious, darker. "But no thanks to you. You're good for a lot more than standing in front of monsters, Stevie. You know that, right?"

Steve shrugged one shoulder. "Kinda."

Eddie's hands gently cupped his face, eyes softening as Steve focused on him.

"You're more than a weapon. You're more than an expendable body. You understand me?" Eddie's voice shook as Steve gave a short nod. "You're my world. I can't see my world end."

"I am?"

"Despite my best efforts of trying to move on from the stupid crush I had on you, yeah," Eddie sighed. "Nursed me back to health and made me fall in love with you."

"Not bullshit?" Steve's eyes felt heavy, but he had to fight it, had to have this talk with Eddie before he passed out again.

"Never. You're everything, Steve Harrington. And when you can keep your eyes open for more than two minutes, I'm gonna kiss you so hard it bruises."

Steve smiled as his eyes closed.

Eddie's hands carried him out of hell and into forever.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #steddieholidaydrabbles #pop up event #spring #cw: canon typical violence #cw: mild blood #hurt/comfort #getting together

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holllandtrash · 1 year

Text

last call | max verstappen

pairing: max verstappen x reader

a one shot based on the song last call by jamie miller, i highly suggest listening to it 'Cause when it's last call I wanna be your first call I wanna be your ride home You're gonna be my downfall

word count: 7.4k tags/warnings: soft and sweet, alcohol consumption

Max Verstappen was a lot of things.

He was a world champion, for starters. A two-time world champion, a title he carried proudly. He was on his way to claim that title for the third time, but he didn’t let the arrogance or the ease of it get to his head, there was still work to do this season.

He was a son and a brother. He cared about his family more than the media would ever know, always painting him as some sort of villain on and off the track to which it got to the point that Max simply stopped trying to change people’s opinions. His family knew who he was, he didn’t need to make any adjustments for them.

He was a friend, and a damn good one if he said so himself. To be fair, it was difficult to see the mates he grew up with when his job took him around the world and back, but he never forgot his roots. He cherished any time he got to spend with those in his close circle. He had a rule too, no phones. If he was with his friends, nothing on his phone mattered. That was also why he was deemed ‘antisocial’ during any breaks, however long. God forbid he not take any photos of him having a good time to prove he knows how to have a good time.

Last but most certainly not least, on Friday and Saturday nights in Monaco, he was a chauffeur.

Your chauffeur.

Neither of you were quite sure when this whole arrangement started, but did that really even matter?

Max pulled up alongside the curb of the club and sent you a text. A minute later you came walking out the doors, a grin plastered on your face as you said your goodbyes to your friends.

As you walked around the front of the car, Max tried to not let his gaze linger on the way your skirt showcased the length of your legs and how in a matter of a seconds you’d be sitting next to him and he’d be thanking his lucky stars he drove a manual so he had a reason to keep his hand off of you.

You climbed into the passenger side of his car, the seat was already adjusted to your height. There was an unopened bottle of water in the cup holder. An artist you listened to was already quietly playing through the speakers. Even if Max didn’t get a heads up that you were going out tonight, he knew what to do when you called him.

He knew that if the seat was pushed back you would complain, jokingly. He knew that you’d ask if he had water somewhere in his car and he knew that you’d ask for help to connect your phone to Bluetooth, if it hadn’t already died.

And while Max liked that routine, he also liked seeing your face light up when you realised you no longer needed to ask for anything.

“Hi,” you turned in your chair to face him. You were smiling, but you had been smiling all night. Did you mean any of them in the last few hours? The answer was unknown, but you certainly meant it now. You took one look at Max and you couldn’t help but smile, it was your body’s natural reaction, just like how you turned to face him as soon as you sat down.

“Fun night?” He asked. He always asked that, but you both knew he didn’t care about what you got up to inside the walls of the nightclub. If he cared, he would have joined you the number of times you politely asked him to when you saw him in passing when you left the flat. But Max just wasn’t a nightclub kind of person.

“Yeah,” you sighed, running your fingers through your hair. “Yeah, Rina’s a bit of a handful, but it was fun.”

“You stayed out late,” Max pointed out, but not in a type of way you would expect a parent to discipline their kid. It was simply Max calling attention to the time, the same time as always.

This was a habit you had fallen into, unintentionally.

Wherever you were, whatever establishment, when their bartenders yelled for last call, you pulled out your phone and called Max. The call for the last round of drinks was your reminder that you needed to go home and luckily, there was someone who would pick you up, every time, without fail.

It was convenient that you two lived in the same building. It may have been in passing that Max offered for you to ever call him if you needed something, but neither of you expected it to spiral into this.

He was just being friendly. It was the neighbourly thing to do.

Which is why you were hesitant the first time you called Max when you needed a ride home. But all of your friends had left you, you lost your credit card somewhere on the dance floor and in your state of mind, you were in no position to try and walk the streets of Monte Carlo alone.

So you called him, apologising about a dozen times but through the line you heard him get up from bed with a quiet sigh. You heard the jingle of keys and it wasn’t long before you finally heard Max’s car roar to life and he told you he’d be there in ten minutes.

That pattern of sounds became music to your ears before you knew it. The faint grunt as he stood up, the keys twirling around his finger, his car turning on.

Breath, keys, car. It was clockwork. It was something you pretty much expected at this point when you called him.

And Max, well Max knew it was pointless to even lay down, but he did on the off chance you didn’t go out. You always went out.

Max had a good heart. He wanted his friends to be safe and somehow, you had wormed your way into that layer of his life. You were one of his friends. And he would rather you call him every Friday night than have to wake up in the morning and not know if you got home at all.

It was convenient that he was home for the break. He was in Monaco. He could be there for you when you needed him, and he would be.

But that pegged the question, what did you do when he was away? When he was racing? When he was across the globe fighting for championship points, who did you call to pick you up at the end of the night?

Max never asked. In fact, the topic of his job never came up with you. You knew he was a Formula 1 driver, he mentioned it subtly, well he thought it was subtle, it really wasn't. And when you said “Oh yeah, my dad watches that. He likes Josef Newgarden,” Max bit his tongue so as to not tell you that your dad was referring to an IndyCar driver, a completely different series.

You knew very little about the sport. Even with Monaco being the pinnacle track of Formula 1, you never bothered to learn about it or keep up with it. Maybe that’s why Max found it so easy to talk to you in the first place. You never once saw him as a driver. You just saw him as your neighbour and on some nights, your chauffeur.

So one could imagine his surprise when you brought up his career during that drive home.

“When do you go back?” You asked, slight hesitancy in your tone as this was not a topic you knew well, your vocabulary was limited. “To racing?”

“Two weeks,” Max answered. “It’ll be my home race.”

He pulled up to a red light and glanced at you, instantly recognising that the term home race was not one you were familiar with, but you nodded as though you did.

“It’s in the Netherlands,” he further clarified. Your mouth formed an ‘o’ shape as you were reminded that he was Dutch.

“That’ll be fun,” you added.

Why was this awkward? Neither of you were usually ones for small talk. Usually you would get in the car and talk about the characters you saw that you knew he’d get a laugh at. You would be chatting his ear off, that was part of the routine.

And tonight, you were struggling to fill the silence. Max couldn’t tell why.

You knew why, however.

It was because when you were out tonight, your friend Rina was whisked away by someone who asked to dance with her. She blushed, her cheeks and neck turning bright red before saying yes and taking his hand to lead her towards the dance floor.

You watched with amusement, happy for your friend, but there was that sinking feeling of jealousy settling in the pit of your stomach. Granted, the man she was dancing with was not your type. He was tall, too tall, with dark features, an arm of tattoos. Sure he seemed charming and he certainly knew how to dance, but you weren’t jealous he had chosen Rina instead of you.

You were jealous that your friend had someone to dance with.

And you had been asked a few times by strangers to join them under the lights, but you turned down all of them. They weren’t people you wanted to spend your time with. They didn’t give you butterflies when you thought about the potential of starting something new with a stranger from the club.

No, you got those butterflies when you climbed into the passenger seat of Max’s car. They were faint, they came as fast as they went. They could have been mistaken for nausea if you weren’t certain you only had two drinks tonight.

But they were there.

Which led to your next thought, if Max ever asked you to dance, you’d say yes in a heartbeat.

And you had been attracted to Max since the first day you saw him, basically, but you kept those feelings to yourself, even as they grew from a physical attraction to more.

Recently, however, they had been getting harder and harder to ignore.

So maybe that’s why you were struggling to move past this silence right now. You were suddenly looking at Max in a very different light. He was your friend, yes, but he had proven time and time again that he would show up for you, that he wouldn’t hesitate to pick you up no matter that hour. None of your other friends made that commitment to you.

But you would never act on any of it. The thoughts, the feelings. Max had never once hinted that he was interested, he was just nice. He was wholesome, despite what you had heard in the media. He was just looking out for you.

So when he walked you to the door of your flat that evening, you said goodnight like you usually did and you headed inside.

You had no idea that Max lingered in the hallway for a minute, debating with himself whether or not he should knock on your door. He’d done it before, making up some excuse to talk to you for just another few minutes.

Because the truth was, Max enjoyed the time he spent with you, even if it was limited to those car rides from the club to your apartment complex. He liked not knowing which version of you would climb into the passenger seat. While you were almost always talkative, there were times when all you wanted was a coffee at an ungodly hour. There were times when you were complaining about the people you met. There were times when you couldn’t stop laughing to the point that Max had to pull over because your laughter was angelic and contagious and he wasn’t about to risk getting into an accident because the two of you couldn’t contain yourselves.

Max liked the fact that you always called him at the end of the night.

For some weird reason, he liked that you were thinking of him. It made him so unbelievably happy to know that when the bartender yelled for ‘last call’ at the end of the night, he was your first call.

But those phone calls were only ever restricted to Friday and Saturday nights. And only when he was in Monaco. While you didn’t understand Formula 1, you must have followed it a bit to know when he wasn’t home. You never called him during a race weekend.

Except that one night last year when he was in Austin. It was just after 2am in Monaco, but Max was sitting down and having dinner in his hotel room. For you, it was early Sunday morning. For him it was still Saturday.

And it was because you didn’t recognise the pattern, you didn’t hear the breath, the keys, the car, you instantly knew that this was a weekend where he was away. He was working, racing, whatever he wanted to call it.

“Oh fuck,” you blurted out before Max could say anything. Your exclamation was met with a hefty laugh. He wasn’t annoyed in any means that you had called him while he was away, just a bit surprised is all.

“I can order you an uber,” He instantly offered. You heard the sound of him shifting on the bed and his voice then echoed as it bounced off the walls of his hotel room, like he turned on the speakerphone, like he was already looking for the app to order you an uber from halfway across the world.

“I can do that myself,” you argued.

The line was silent for a moment. You were both thinking the same thing. Why didn’t you just always call an uber? Why did you always rely on Max to drive you home?

Neither of you voiced that question. You had your own answers, but if they didn’t match up then that would lead to an entirely different conversation, one that you could do without, one that had the risk of ruining whatever sort of pattern you had fallen into.

“You okay? Did you have a fun night?” Max moved on, not wanting to think about how you were probably ordering that car for yourself. If he was in Monaco right now, he’d already be in the elevator down to the parking garage.

“Yeah, it was good,” your words slurred together. Not enough to alarm Max, but he knew you. He knew that the more you drank, the more honest you were.

You proved that point about two seconds later.

“Honestly, Jordan’s just fucking annoying,” you sighed. Max could picture you running your hands through your hair, you did that often, but especially when something was eating at you and right now, it was your friend Rina’s boyfriend. Boyfriend? Boy toy? Ex? Max tried to keep up, but there was a new label every week. It’d be easier to stay up to date with your life and the ‘drama’ that circled it if you saw him more than once or twice a weekend, but he wasn’t about to put that thought in your head and potentially scare you off. What you had was fine. The late night calls, the last calls turned first calls was fine.

“What happened now?” Max asked.

“Well we literally told him not to come out, Rina’s still pissed after what he did last week- oh shit, hang on.”

While you searched for what Max could only assume was a credit card or your lip gloss or something that should have fallen out of your pockets by now, he thought back to what Jordan did last week.

You sighed heavily into the receiver, “...what was I saying?”

“Rina’s still mad,” Max reminded you. “She hasn’t forgiven him for getting drunk at her parents anniversary dinner?”

You laughed, “God you have a better memory than me. I had to ask Rina why we were giving him the cold shoulder tonight.”

Point for Max.

Why did this little victory mean so much to him?

“Anyway, he tried to make it up to her tonight by buying all of her drinks but then his card declined like an hour in, who lives in fucking Monte Carlo and can’t afford drinks? He’s a fake, is what he is and Rina deserves so much better. I have a theory he’s-”

“That he's from Nice,” Max finished with his own chuckle. “Want me to hire a P.I. to look into it?”

There was a pause and then a very serious, “Can you actually do that?”

“I could but I was joking,” Max said. He could picture your pouty bottom lip. It was a good thing you weren’t actually with him. He probably would have given in and found a private investigator within an hour.

“Oh I think my uber- yeah that’s it,” you said, more to yourself than to him as your voice trailed off at the end. “I’m sorry for calling. I knew you were in Austin, I just- I forgot. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise,” Max told you. “You don’t ever need to apologise for calling me. You know that if I was home I’d come pick you up, right?”

A faint inhale, one that held so many feelings that your words could never express, “I know.”

“Get home safe, okay?”

“I will,” you assured him. “And good luck today. Or- tomorrow, I guess. I know you’ll kill it.”

This was how Max knew you weren’t keeping up with Formula 1. He had officially claimed his second world championship title last weekend in Japan. He could quite literally sit out of the remaining races and still hold enough points to safely stand at the top of the driver standings.

But he wasn’t going to tell you that because he knew you’d instantly feel bad for not knowing, for not congratulating him. In your head, the championship fight went until the end of the season and typically it would, but this year was different for Max.

Max just said thank you and you both hung up. You climbed into the backseat of an uber where there was no water waiting for you and you didn’t dare ask for the driver to play Harry Styles. Max laid back on his bed, pushing his tray of room service aside as he stared up at the hotel ceiling.

When he returned that following Monday, Max was surprised to see dark blue streamers hanging on the outside of his door. There was a card shoved halfway underneath the door and he opened it up, looking at the delicate handwriting that read ‘heard you’re a world champion or whatever, let me know if you want to celebrate, I don’t mind picking you up for a change’.

Max laughed as he read the card. It was very you. You didn’t give two shits about the driver championship and Max loved that. He loved that you found reasons to be his friend outside from the fact that he was a Formula 1 driver. You didn’t care that his name came with power, wealth, fame, but you still showed your support with the little you knew about racing. You were a good friend to him.

And that’s what it was. Friendship. Why else would you have written, ‘I don't mind picking you up for a change’? You weren’t offering to celebrate with him, you were offering to be the designated driver after he went out with his group of friends, the friends that did care about his career.

Max would have gone out and celebrated with you. He would have said yes in a heartbeat, if you asked.

But you didn't. The closest that you came to going out with him was when you politely invited him to join you on your evenings out with your close circle, but Max was an afterthought. You never knocked on his door and invited him out, it was only if you passed him in the hallway or if the elevator doors opened and he was standing on the other side.

And Max said the same thing every time. ‘Nah, you have fun. Let me know if you need a ride home.’

Max thought you were just being friendly, neighbourly, but the truth was, you were waiting for the day where he said ‘Yeah, why not?’.

You never went out of your way to ask him out because of the rejection you had received in passing. How embarrassing would it be if you knocked on his door only to be met with the same rejection? To see the look of pity on his face as the door slowly shut.

There was a lot of uncertainty when it came to how you saw him or how he saw you and the only thing that was certain, was that you were friends.

So that’s why Max didn’t knock on your door now and make up some excuse about how you left his lip gloss in his car. He returned to his room and found himself staring up at the ceiling of his flat at 2:30 in the morning, something he had gotten quite used to, until sleep took over as he was thinking about how maybe next time, maybe next Friday, he’ll make a proper move.

But a wrench was thrown into his plans when your name lit up his phone screen a few days later. It wasn’t weird that you were calling him, what he couldn’t understand was why. It was a little after three on a Wednesday. Your conversations, the phone calls, the late night drives, they were confined to weekends.

Max answered though, maybe you left work early and accidentally drank too many sangrias on a patio. He’d pick you up, of course, this was just very unlike your pattern.

He expected to hear the slurring of words. He could understand drunk you enough to piece together what you were saying.

But the sharp inhale through your words, this was new. It was clear you were actively trying to not cry into the phone, trying to hold yourself together but Max heard it as your meek ‘hi’ came through the receiver.

And god did it break him.

“Where are you?” Max asked, already sliding his shoes on practically sprinting towards the elevator. Of course it was stuck on the main floor. No matter how many times he pressed the button, that steel boxed moved too damn slowly for his own good.

“Horizon,” you sniffed. Max recognized that restaurant. “I’m sorry, I didn’t- I didn’t know who to call. Can you-”

“I’m already on the way.”

It wasn’t far. Max pulled up outside the restaurant in under ten minutes. You were sitting on a bench, dark shades covering your eyes but Max caught the way you raised your hand to wipe your cheeks before climbing into the car.

He didn’t even think to grab tissues before leaving his flat, but he had a feeling you would just deny them anyway. If he knew anything about you, he knew you weren’t one to cry. You had a very hard exterior, you felt things deeply, but you didn’t cry. Not in front of other people.

“Can we just- I don’t know, can we just drive for a bit?” you kept your gaze on the road in front of you. This wasn’t like you and Max would do anything to see the light in your eyes, to see your bright smile that made getting out of bed at 2 in morning worth it every time.

Max nodded, getting the idea that you didn’t want to talk. Or if you did, it would be on your own accord. You crossed one leg over the other and Max glanced at the beige romper you wore. He didn’t point out the dark red stain on your hem, but you rubbing at it was certainly not going to get it out. He could only assume it was wine? Did you spill wine on yourself at lunch? Who were you even out for lunch with?

And then he noticed you playing with the ring on your middle finger, again this wasn’t like you. You didn’t fidget and if you did, you’d play with the strands of your hair.

Max had seen you drunk, he’d seen you a few drinks in, he’d seen you sober.

He’d never seen you so upset over something before, though. The silence in the car was heavy. Whatever was on your mind, he wished there was a way for him to take some of the weight off of you.

He wasn’t travelling in any particular direction, just aimlessly around Monaco, but after the seconds turned to minutes, Max saw you visibly relax against the seat of his car.

“Do you know what I do?” You asked him, pulling your sunglasses off.

You both turned your faces towards each other. Faint mascara smudges stained the corner of your eyes. Your cheeks were still rosy, your jaw was clenched in anticipation of the rest of the conversation. This wasn’t the you that Max was used to, but it was a version of you he wanted to get to know. He wanted to know every side of you, even the sides you tried to hide behind sunglasses and spilled wine and choked back tears.

“Job wise?” Max asked for clarification. “Yeah, you’re ah- an environmental consultant? Right?”

You were a little impressed that he knew, but to be fair, you’ve had hundreds of conversations with Max and you weren’t sober for all of them. The discussion of jobs probably slipped your mind.

“I like my job,” you stated.

“Good. That’s important.”

“So why do I feel stuck?”

Max licked his lower lip, “Elaborate.”

“I’ve been doing the same thing since I graduated,” you told him, looking out the window again. Slowly, the Monte Carlo skyline was disappearing into the side mirrors. “And I like it, I do. I like the company I work for. I like the people I work with, but why does it feel like that’s the only thing I have going for me in life right now?”

“I’m sure that’s not true,” Max sighed, but if he was being honest, he had no idea. What he knew about you was minimal and it killed him.

You nodded, but it was just out of politeness so as to not argue that he was wrong.

A few more minutes passed before you inhaled the heaviest breath your lungs could take.

“My sister’s engaged. Rina’s moving to Milan at the end of the summer. My brother travels for a living and I just- I’m not doing anything.”

So that’s what this was about. Max was smart, he could put the pieces together. You talked about your siblings a bit, but you never mentioned your sister getting married before. The way you were looking down at your hand throughout this drive told Max that this late lunch was you meeting your sister so she could announce the good news.

And something as big as that would undoubtedly send someone spiralling, making them question their own life choices, the path they were on. As long as Max has known you, you’ve had the same job, same friends, no partner.

Your best friend moving was not new either, you had excitedly told Max about her job offer a few weeks back, but maybe it was just sinking in now. Everyone around you was moving onto bigger and better things and you were, as you put it, stuck.

“I think I need a change of scenery,” you admitted quietly.

Which was not what Max wanted to hear.

Selfishly, he didn’t want you to leave Monaco. Even though he was the one who was gone so many weeks out of the year for the races, he liked knowing you would always be there when he returned home. That you were just down the hall.

Before Max could try and talk you out of moving, you reached across the centre console and put your hand over his, the one that rested on the gear stick. This wasn’t the first time you had done this, Max knew you to be a little handsy when you were drinking, but you seemed to be sober this time.

“I’m sorry for calling you,” you said, even though you really didn’t need to apologise. “I didn’t know who else to call and I just, I needed to breathe.”

Max found comfort in that.

That he was someone you could clear your head with, that you didn’t need to put on an act around him. In a way, you trusted him. You must have if he was your first call after your sister dropped a bombshell.

When the two of you found your way back to the apartment complex, Max walked you to the door like he always did. Your flushed cheeks had returned to its normal colour. Your eyes no longer looked glossed over. And the smile you gave him seemed genuine.

You unlocked the door and pushed it open and something in Max screamed now or never and before he knew it, he was reaching for your hand to keep you from going inside. He pulled you back to face him and the expression you wore was unreadable.

Max froze.

Something that he never did.

He was always calm and collected, always ahead of his thoughts, always knew what to do and when to do it.

But that was thanks to his training and his training only prepared him for driving at ridiculous speeds and navigating dozens of race tracks and thinking on his feet in tough situations while he sat behind the wheel of an F1 car.

His training didn’t prepare him for how stunned he would feel as he met your eyes, grabbing your attention for the first time outside the safety net of his regular car.

Whatever Max wanted to say, it had now vanished and he had no choice but to rely on the words that he had told you many times before.

“You know you don’t need to apologise for calling me, right?” Max said, his hand falling from yours.

“I know,” a faint breath of laughter followed your assurance.

“And for the record-” Max paused. “I don’t think you’re stuck. I think you’re right where you need to be.”

Max’s words stayed with you for the next few days. In fact, they were all you could think about, even when you met Rina Saturday night at your usual spot. She had ordered you a drink, she was a few in herself already and you had barely taken a sip when she brought up the idea of you moving to Milan with her.

You almost spit out the cocktail, “I- what? Move with you? Rina, my job’s here.”

“Yeah but you’re so experienced, I’m sure you could find another one in Milan,” Rina stuck out her lower lip. “I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do without my best friend.”

While you might have contemplated moving a few days ago, you weren’t sure you were really ready to leave Monaco. This was your home, you loved it here. Despite what you said to Max about feeling stuck, his words were burned into your mind.

You weren’t stuck. You had no reason to leave. You wanted to be here.

You just had a momentary lapse of judgement.

“I’m not moving, Rina,” you sighed, connecting your hand with hers. “But I’ll visit and you can too. I’m still your best friend, even if we’re in different countries.”

She knew better than to plead her case any more, deciding that spending the night drinking and dancing was more fun than thinking about her upcoming move.

And before you knew it, the DJ made an announcement for the last call at the bar and you were pulling out your phone to call Max.

“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel?” Rina said, or rather, yelled, as the music was still blaring. She saw his contact on your screen, she saw the way the corner of your lips were pulled upwards when you thought about being with him shortly.

“Because I don’t feel anything,” you shouted back. It was a lie. A bold faced lie that your friend saw right through but didn’t push you any more on it.

She walked with you to the curb. Max rolled down the window and waved to her, offering her a ride as well. But Rina denied it, she knew this was your time to be with Max.

“Get home safe, I love you,” you called out, hand gripping the handle of the passenger side door. Rina blew you a kiss and then you climbed in.

Max reached into the backseat and grabbed the bottle of water he had tossed there when he left his apartment. He waited until taking a sip before asking if you had a fun night.

“Yeah, Rina asked me to move to Milan with her,” you answered, wiping the corner of your mouth. You looked at Max expectantly, trying to gauge what his answer would be. Surely the man who told you that you were in the right place wasn’t going to encourage you to move.

Max just hummed and put the car into drive. He waited until you were a few minutes away from the club to say anything, as if seeing Rina standing on the sidewalk in the rearview mirror was somehow going to make this conversation harder.

“What did you-” Max stopped himself and chose something else to say, “You’re not moving, though. Right?”

And then you saw it. The way his eyebrows furrowed in concern. The way his hand clenched over the gear lever. The way his jaw tightened as he fought with himself before asking if you were in fact leaving.

Max didn’t want you to go.

That thought alone made your stomach turn in knots, but not the kind you felt when you were sick. You were most definitely not sick, you could have been floating on cloud 9 when you realised Max wanted you to stay in Monaco.

“Are you kidding?” You retorted, feeling a burst of confidence. Maybe it was the alcohol, but you had been drunk before and never once tried flirting. No time like the present. “Think of how inconvenient it would be for you to drive to Milan every time I go clubbing.”

Max chuckled, his features softening as the lines around his lips made an appearance. God you loved his smile.

“Oh so you’re staying for my sake? Well that’s- that’s really kind of you. Thank you.”

He stopped at a red light and turned to you. The heavy weight that was lingering on his shoulders when you mentioned moving had disappeared instantly. You weren’t going anywhere. You would still be here when Max returned from his races. You’d be here during the break. You’d be here, calling his phone on those Friday and Saturday nights when you needed a ride home.

“Can I ask you something?” Max spoke quietly, waiting until you nodded before getting something off his mind that had been there since this whole driving arrangement started. “Who do you call when I’m not in Monaco?”

Your smile was soft as the corner of your lips were tugged upwards. Max, if he wanted to, could have convinced himself it was the alcohol that caused you to be all smiley, but he also wanted to believe he had something to do with it.

Dropping your gaze for a moment, you parted your lips, closed them again, and then took a breath as Max waited for your response.

“Max, I don’t go out when you’re not in Monaco.”

He was thinking he didn’t hear you correctly. Maybe you said you called some guy named Marco. That made more sense. You called a back-up rather than put your evening social life on pause while he was away.

He needed clarification, “What?”

You laughed this time, looking out the windshield. The traffic light was still red, but Max didn’t need to rely on the soft glow of the street light to make out the shade of pink that was climbing up your neck and cheeks.

“I don’t go out clubbing when you’re not in Monaco,” you repeated. He had heard you correctly.

Max wasn’t sure what to think.

He felt like an idiot, for starters. If he had known you wanted to see him, to spend time with him, he would have put an effort in to join you during your nights out. Or better yet, maybe he would have asked you on a date.

But he was clueless. He didn’t know that you relied on those calls at the end of the night because you were too shy to actually ask him out like a normal person would. You were too afraid of stepping outside of this pattern you both fell into because what if it didn’t work out?

Now it was all out in the open. The only reason you went out as much as you did when he was home was because you used it as an excuse to call him, to see him.

The blaring of a horn from the car behind him caused Max to shift gears, quite literally and metaphorically. He took off, having missed the light turn green, and his attention went back to the road.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to look at you, he did. He very much wanted to continue this conversation but he was at a loss for words.

The silence only grew during the drive back to your building. In the corner of his eye, he could see you shifting in the seat. You kept turning your phone on and off, hoping there would be texts to distract you from this hush that had fallen over the car. You were overthinking everything now, did you say the wrong thing? Would it have been better if you didn’t say anything?

Max too was overthinking everything. Had he misread signs you had tried to give him? Was he now making things worse by not acknowledging what you had said? With each passing second, it became more and more unbearable as you sat in anticipation for what sort of conversation was going to come next.

When Max finally pulled into the parking garage underneath the building, you couldn’t have reached for the door handle faster. You wanted to go inside, to forget you had said anything. God you even debated deleting his number from your phone so you didn’t risk calling him again the next time you went out.

But Max was quick too.

He knew he had to do something to make up for how painful this car ride was, something that showed you he was on the same page as you, that he too looked forward to the moments he was home just so he could wait for your phone call.

He stepped out of the car when you did, walking around the front instead of heading towards the elevator. You kept your eyes down, planning on just walking right past him, and you would have, had Max not grabbed hold of your hand and pulled you into his body.

His fingers moved from your hand to your waist as his other hand cupped the side of your face and you finally looked at him for the first time since you got into the car.

Now it was your turn to be at a loss for words, but that didn’t matter anyway. It wasn’t like you had time to say anything before Max took that leap, crossed the line, and pressed his lips to yours.

And it was everything you had been waiting for.

Max leaned against the hood of his car as you slid your hand up his shirt, grabbing the thin material as you wasted no time in kissing him back. His mouth was tender and soft as it moved against yours, both of you feeling the same intensity that had been building up for weeks, maybe even months now.

It took everything in Max to not drag you back into the car and pull you on his lap in the driver's seat, an image that he had painted in his head a while ago. Instead, his grip on your waist just tightened, holding you against his chest the way he had been wanting to for a while now.

Your nose brushed against his when you pulled back, your gaze lingered on his lips before finally darting upwards.

The parking garage was quiet, there was a low hum that came from the pipes above you. The overhead lights did nothing to set any sort of mood, but you couldn’t imagine a better place to share a first kiss with Max.

You weren’t in the safety of his car, a place that had become so comfortable to you. By waiting until you stepped out, by stopping you from walking to the elevator, Max was showing you that this was something he wanted and he wanted it when the car ride was over. He wanted it before you called him, before you went out for the night, before the weekend even started.

He relaxed against the hood of his car, both of you sharing similar looks of serenity. There was no more confusion, no more wavering uncertainty.

His fingers brushed through your hair before bringing your lips to his once more.

And then there it was, that smile of yours that made getting into his car two in the morning so fucking worth it.

“What are you doing next weekend?” Max asked. He now knew the answer wouldn’t be going out with friends, that was reserved for when he was home.

You shrugged, “I’m not sure, why?”

“Well you said you wanted a change of scenery, right?” Max recalled your conversation from earlier this week. “How about the Netherlands?”

“You want me to come to a race?” You were probably the last person who should be invited to a Grand Prix and Max knew this, he even laughed at your doubtful response.

“I really do,” he said.

“I don’t know anything about Formula 1.”

Max rubbed his thumb over your side, the simple gesture was enough to have your body curving against his once more.

“I have all of next week to give you a crash course,” he pointed out. “If you’re interested.”

And of course you were. There’s nothing else you wanted more than to spend your evenings with Max, to learn more about his career, to learn about him. When your lips curved upwards into another smile, Max knew you were on board.

“Okay,” you nodded slightly. “On one condition.”

“Which is?”

“You go out with me the next weekend you’re in Monaco.”

Max dipped his head back and laughed. You rested your hand at the nape of his neck, pulling his face back to yours.

“I’m serious.”

“I know you are,” he chuckled. “And I will, but we’ll be leaving before last call.”

“That’s fine with me as long as you still take me home,” you pressed your lips together tightly, trying to contain your eagerness for the night that was still far in the future. Max brushed his thumb over your lower lip. He too was thinking ahead.

Not just to that upcoming weekend, but every weekend after and all of the days inbetween.

Coming home to Monaco was always something he looked forward to, but now he had even more of a reason to anticipate the breaks between races. You two didn’t have to wait until a Friday evening to see each other anymore.

He didn’t have to be your first call at the end of the night, but you both knew he still would be, and so much more.

He’d be your first call when you got home from work and you’d be his when he landed in a new country. You’d be the first person to call him after watching his winning performance of a race and likewise, you’d be the first person he wanted to talk to, the first person he wanted to celebrate with.

There’d be a lot of firsts moving forward, but you didn’t need to wait until last call anymore.

masterlist here

this was mostly for @tsarinablogs and @estevries

#max verstappen x you #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen #max verstappen au #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen one shot #mv1 #mv 1 fanfic #max au #f1 one shot #f1 instagram au #f1 requests

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vinvantae · 1 year

Text

Unmasked

Part 8/16

<<< previous part

Word count - 3.6k

**********************************************

Yourusername tagged Charles Leclerc in their story

It was the first race of the season and the official ‘hard launch’ of yours and Charles’ relationship, from this point you were allowed to start posting clear images of each other - but you had been begging the team to have a proper meeting about your reveal but Mattia kept pushing it, delaying and delaying until it was too ‘inconvenient’ because of the race weekend and the focus would now be on the upcoming race instead of you. Instead, you were told to just keep your head down and focus on your performance on and off the track as both Charles’ girlfriend and as Thirty.

Your jaw felt tight as you pulled your Ferrari polo over your head, Charles humming softly behind you as he gathered his things for the day - in seemingly much higher spirits than you. The car had performed well during testing and so his hopes were high for a good result in the first race. “Are you nearly ready to go, y/n?”

“Yeah, of course. Just need to grab my bag… I dropped most of my stuff off at the motorhome yesterday.” You smiled, taking his hand as he offered it to you. “You ready for quali?”

“I’m actually buzzed.” He said, grinning and pulling you closer. “Starting the season off with a new car and with the best girl at my side?”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Charles, I’ve been at your side for years.”

He playfully narrowed his gaze, lifting his hand to cup your jaw - leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. “You know what I mean, don’t be a tease. I’m sorry that they keep dismissing your meeting, I know it must be getting frustrating.”

“You have no idea.” You sighed softly. “And I want to talk to them about us as well… I don’t know if they’ll want to handle this differently now there’s real feelings involved.”

“Well, either way I’m here for you. I know I say this a lot but I like you and regardless of what they say I can see a future for us.”

“Those are some big words, Charles… you really think about the future like that?” He could tell your voice was timid, that you were unsure.

The Monaco native simply nodded. “Not to scare you off or anything. I know it’s quick to say it but I’ve always felt strongly for you and this whole situation has just cemented it for me.”

“It doesn’t. I’ve just… I’ve just been alone for so long it feels strange to have someone who wants to stay in my life long term…”

The fact your admission didn’t shock Charles broke his heart- having the career you did, didn’t allow people to get close and those who were lucky enough to be in your life, like your father, were nowhere. He wanted to be that person for you, the person you could always turn to even if the rest of the world seemed to turn its back.

“Well, you’re stuck me with me for as long as you want me around.” He spoke softly, almost as if he was scared that his voice could break you if he raised it.

You gave him a gentle smile before the two of you head out to the paddock for qualifying day - they wanted to use you and Charles coming together as a distraction from the Thirty rumours, so you complied. You knew biting back would just result in them pushing your meeting further and further but you just couldn’t afford to get sued either. You were under their thumb, so for now you had to let them play their cards before you showed yours.

Although you knew yours and Charles' relationship was F1’s worst kept secret, you were surprised just how many people seemed to care when you stepped into the paddock hand-in-hand. Your teammate seemed used to it, chatting idly away to you as you made your way to the Ferrari motorhome but you couldn’t help but sense every single pair of eyes that fell on you.

“Look at the lovebirds, so cute!” You turned at the sound of Carlos’ voice - his Redbull teammate not too far behind. “I approve of this pairing.”

“That fast, huh?” You teased.

“I’m just surprised it took you so long.” Max chimed in. “We’ve all known each other for nearly 2 decades at this point… so if anything, this is slow.”

“Carlos didn’t know us.” You corrected. “It was really nice to spend time with everyone in Bali though, I felt really welcomed.”

The two Redbull drivers both gave you kind smiles, your childhood friend went to speak again but they were ushered away by their coaches - wanting to get them ready for free practice. You would have to disappear into your mask for the next few hours, put on your persona - visor down, race suit on. Charles gave you one more kiss on the cheek before ushering you into the motorhome, making it seem as if you were simply a couple spending some time apart. But you were subtly guided into your driver's room to get ready yourself.

You just wanted this weekend over with.

*********************

Yourusername added to their story

You and Charles sandwiched Max on the grid when the race finally rolled around, the Champion’s teammate beside you on the second row. You knew Redbull were going to be tough to beat, their car seemed significantly better than last year and with Mercedes seemingly struggling the fight was going to be between you and them. Your third championship was within reach and you were going to fight tooth and nail to get it - not letting your relationship with Charles sway that. Sure, you wanted him to win his first but at the end of the day, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t want that feeling again.

It was dark as you sat in the cockpit of your car, eyes flickering across the track in front of you as the team worked on your car. Your race engineer repeated race strategy over the comms to you and you simply nodded along - tapping your fingers on your steering wheel.

Charles walked past your car and patted the halo lightly, sending you a smile before heading to his own car - race helmet hanging from his fingers. His fireproofs clung to his figure and you couldn’t help but study his figure; his broad shoulders into his little waist - it was crazy the way some of these men were built and the Monegasque was no exception to that. There were many times during your trip that you wanted to throw caution to the wind and just have your way with him. But you needed to behave, as much as you wanted to enjoy these new feelings with him, getting another Championship was at the front of your mind.

As the cars circled the track in the formation lap, your mind cleared of everything - it was the first race of the season and you were determined to make it the best one yet. If you were going to take your helmet off some day soon, you had to make sure everyone remembered why you had the seat in the first place. You deserved to be here and you had to prove that to yourself and everyone else.

You pulled up to your grid spot, angling your car in just a way to get the best start. And with one more deep breath, the lights began to count down.

“It’s lights out and away we go.”

The first race of the season and you’d got a 1-2, the absolute perfect start - it couldn’t have gone any better, especially with both Redbull cars not finishing the race. As soon as you stepped out of the car, Charles wrapped you up in a hug - his strong arms squeezing you tight. “We did it!”

You held in your laughter knowing there were cameras nearby that could pick up audio and gave him a squeeze back. A warm touch was placed on your shoulder and you turned to see the kind eyes of none other than Lewis, the Redbull DNF meant he was joining you both on the podium - he’d been one of your biggest rivals the last few years but he always had nothing but kind words to say about you, even in during your toughest battles.

“Amazing race today, Thirty. Just saw a clip of your overtake on Checo before he went out, so smooth.” He smiled, his gaze flickering across your helmet.

It took everything in you not to thank him, so you simply gave his hand a firm shake. He gave you an understanding smile and went back over to his team. You could see the media hoping you’d come over for a post-race interview but before you could even think about it you were ushered straight inside to wait for the podium. Their fear you would reveal the secret was becoming larger each day, especially with the speculation - so any time they could get you away from the press they would.

“You didn’t say anything out there did you?” Your handler spoke up, you shook your head. “You didn’t do anything that would give you away?”

They were the standard questions he asked after every race, but more than ever they irked you - you’d been doing this for years, they just never trusted you. You bit your tongue and nodded again, wanting nothing more than to take your helmet off and run out on the podium.

“Good. Now, you know the next bit - go out, get your trophy, champagne and then back to your room.”

A stray tear rolled down your cheek, the worst part of it all was not being able to celebrate with your team after the race. Share your achievement with the people who had helped you get there. It broke your heart. Sure, they had Charles’ win to celebrate this time but when it had just been you on the podium you watched them all cheer without you. This time however, you were caught a little by surprise when on the podium, Charles’ hand came up to rest on the side of your helmet - it was just for a moment but the way he looked at you made your heart skip a beat. And with no nearby mics to pick up any audio he leant in and whispered.

“Champagne in your room after this.”

You were so glad to be wearing your helmet because your cheeks flushed as dark as your race suit. God, I wish I could kiss you right now. You were brought back into the moment as your visor was coated in champagne by Lewis, the Brit smiling big as he tipped the bottle over your helmet. You returned the favour by spraying him directly in the chest - savouring the moment of celebration before you were locked away.

It was then you decided to put your toe across the line, as the three of you stepped off the podium and out away from the cameras - you turned to Lewis, approaching him before your handler could haul you away. “Thank you. For everything… I-”

Before you could get another word out, your handler grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you away - not before you managed to get a look at Lewis’ reaction. His face had split into a big smile. “Thank you as well!”

You were practically shoved into your room by your handler, who slammed the door behind you. “What the fuck was that? You know the terms of your contract, y/n. Are you trying to get sued?!”

“All I said was thank you.” You said calmly, finally pulling your helmet off. “The media knows I’m a woman so what’s the harm in saying thank you to Lewis? I could still be anyone.”

His jaw clenched. “You better hope he says nothing or else this will have big consequences.”

He left the room in a huff when you didn’t respond, simply slumping on the sofa - letting your head roll back onto the back. Your eyes fluttered closed as you finally took a moment to yourself to be happy with your result. P2 in the first race of the season. If this is how the rest of it was going to be then maybe your third championship really was possible.

“Knock knock.” Charles pushed open the door just enough to come into the room with a bottle of champagne, locking it behind him. “As promised… felt wrong celebrating without you.”

Your teammate sat beside you, offering you the bottle of which you took a large sip. “That was, uh, cool what you did… with Lewis.”

“Could’ve fucked my entire career but-” You shrugged. “Honestly, fuck it. I’ve raced him my entire career… I would’ve said more if-”

Charles chuckled and draped an arm across your shoulders, letting your head rest against him. “You said plenty. You have no idea how much that meant to Lewis, he was absolutely buzzing. Giggling like a little school girl.”

That made you smile. “Oh, good… I really… I don’t regret doing it, I know Lewis understands what I’m going through - I trust him to keep his cool around the press even if I don’t have to ask.”

“Cheers to that.”

You tilted your head to look at him, his green eyes already directed at you. His hand came up once again but this time could rest on your skin - his thumb brushing across your cheek before he pressed a chaste but meaningful kiss to your lips. Your eyes fluttered closed as you savoured the feeling, chasing his lips as he pulled back - just enough where you could feel his breath against your skin.

“...be mine?”

You let out a breathless chuckle. “Am I not already?”

He scoffed playfully. “You’re such a tease, mon amour… please, be my girlfriend… for real.”

“Mhmm, pretty boy. Love when you beg” You giggled softly, pressing your lips to his. “I’d love to be your girlfriend, Charles.”

You weren't sure what response you expected but he simply rested his forehead against yours, his hand still resting on your jaw - a small, soft smile on his face. “I really like you, y/n. And no matter what happens with your career, I’ve got your back. You’ve been through hell and back for this team and I won’t let them tarnish your reputation.”

“Thank you… and just for the record, I really like you too.”

A knock on the door summoning Charles to the media pen brought you both back to reality, and with one more kiss he left the room - allowing you to turn on the TV just in time to catch none other than Lewis in front of the camera.

“Congrats on your first podium of the season, Lewis, how are you feeling?”

He nodded eagerly. “Really good, I’m really happy - I know the Redbulls not finishing definitely played its part and we have some work to do with the car but yeah I’m very happy with the result.”

“You had some nice words for Thirty after the race, did they give you anything?”

You chewed nervously at the skin around your fingers but just as you predicted Lewis simply shook his head. “Nothing. They’re as elusive as ever.”

“Thank god.” You mumbled, finally deciding to strip out of your race suit and back into your polo shirt - putting your admin disguise back on before your handler finally decided to send someone to let you out of your room.

When you entered the garage, you started helping pack away - post-race was always the most frustrating for you. To blend in they insisted you do the extra work, but you were exhausted - you’d just done nearly 60 laps of a grand prix and then they expected you to do grunt work too? It was almost as if Charles could hear your internal monologue because he came up behind you, leaning across your shoulder to press a kiss to your cheek.

“My girl… let’s get you out of here, hmm?” His voice was low. “You’ve worked hard enough.”

You let out a sigh of relief, turning to face him. “You read my mind, my hero.”

He lent in and kissed you, his hand finding its home on your jaw - feeling bolder about his affections now you were official outside of the contract. You had almost forgotten that this had all started off as fake but was now very real. He wasn’t kissing you because he had to, he was kissing you because he wanted to. And you were still trying to wrap your head around it all - but while you did, you were going to enjoy every second of it.

When you pulled back from the kiss, you locked eyes with your PR manager who gave you a thumbs up.

“I almost don’t want to tell them it’s real.” You scoffed lightly, taking his hand to tug him out of the garage. “Let them just think we’re really good actors.”

The Monaco native chuckled softly from beside you, squeezing your hand. You were hoping to escape from the paddock, so you kept your head down - your Ferrari cap blocking your face but alas, you were walking next to Charles bloody Leclerc so it was never going to be easy. He was very quickly distracted by some fans at the barriers, stopping to sign and take photos. You waited patiently, playing the role of a good girlfriend, but let your eyes scan the rest of the paddock.

You turned your head when you felt eyes on you - Lewis’ intense gaze had fixated on you from across the way as Bono spoke to him. The cogs turning in his brain were almost visible - like he was putting the pieces together. You gave him a shy wave and he gave you a two finger salute before nodding towards a small passage between two of the Mercedes motorhomes.

“U-Uhm, I’ll be back in a second, Charles.” Your boyfriend acknowledged you with a simple smile, allowing you to slip away towards the former Champion.

It felt bizarre, sneaking into a darkened alleyway with Lewis Hamilton but you were intrigued by what he had to say. There was barely a foot between you as you stood with your back to the wall, his eyes studying you through long lashes. You could feel your heart pounding in your chest.

“...it’s you isn’t it.” His voice was quiet, eyes boring into yours. “You’re Thirty.”

You pressed your lips into a line and he raised a challenging brow, daring you to deny it. “How did you figure it out?”

His smile alone was worth it. “I could never forget your voice… I can’t believe it’s really you.”

There was a different look in his eyes, as if he was really seeing you for the very first time - his rival, his fellow driver. “I… I have so much I want to say to you, y/n. Maybe we can have a proper talk sometime? I’ll give you my number…”

You were collecting Champion’s phone numbers like pokemon cards at this point - after giving you his number and making him text you so he had yours he placed his hand on your shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze, not too dissimilar from the one he’d given you after the race. “It was nice to meet you for real, y/n. Don’t be a stranger.”

It took a moment for you to catch your breath before you returned to Charles who had finally drawn away from the fans to offer you his hand - frowning a little when he saw the clearly exasperated look on your face. “Everything okay?”

You dragged him back to the car, letting out a deep breath - the driver still staring at you with concern. “Lewis knows.”

“...fucking hell. I saw him in the media pen, he didn’t say anything. Reckon you can still trust him?” He asked, placing a hand on your thigh.

“Don’t think I have a choice.” You chuckled nervously. “So that's you, Sebastian, Max and Lewis… Do you think anyone else is suspicious of me?”

“If they are, they’ve not said anything to me.”

The car park was slowly beginning to empty as the rest of the grid made their way to their cars and bikes. You studied each of them, Fernando, Esteban… Yuki… Valtteri… any one of them could suspect you but you’d never know. You let your eyes return to Charles who still had a worried look on his face, so you lent across and pressed a deep kiss to his lips - this time he was the one chasing you as you pulled back; his chest rising and falling and the green of his eyes almost hidden in its entirely by the depth of his pupils.

“How about…” You said, feeling breathless yourself. “...we go back to our hotel and celebrate our podium.”

His eyes widened a little. “You mean-”

“Oh, I mean…”

You lent in, your hand brushing up his thigh as you whispered absolute filth into his ear - you could practically feel his heart racing as you cupped the back of his neck to kiss him once again. Charles had to fight every urge to pull you into his lap and take you right here in the car park but you deserved more for your first time together. He moved back again and started the engine. you gave him a playful smile.

“Take me home, Winner.”

****************

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thesirencult · 7 months

Text

PAC READING: YOUR DIVINE FEMININE'S AURA

Discussing your feminine's general aura and characteristics. Friendly for both men and girls/theys who like girls. You can also pick it to see how your aura is as a feminine ❤️

Book your reading by sending me a private message xoxo S.

Pile 1

7 of pentacles, 8 of pentacles, 10 of swords

Your DF has the aura of a sweet herbal witch. She lives in her little cabin in the woods and like a fairy she works on perfecting her craft. Greens and purples look great on her.

This is a slow and steady energy. This is someone who loves taking their time. She loves learning and implementing her skills. Making coffee becomes a daily ritual and same goes as washing the dishes.

Her attention to detail is immaculate and that can drive you crazy sometimes but you know that with all that good comes some bad. Very well presented, you can take her anywhere and all eyes will be on her. Very earthy, stable and focused on building a foundation for all things practical before she jumps onto commitment.

Her steady "working on myself" attitude stems from getting backstabbed one too many times. She knows that she has to build herself up and after that all her dreams will manifest. She is into self development and may love going through that tag on Tumblr. She may even be a blogger herself.

She is investing in herself and doesn't shy away from learning about accounting or law. Nothing will stand on her way to that cute fairy cottage *aggressive cute walk* 😉.

Pile 2

9 of pentacles, queen of swords, the magician

Whoever has this DF as a counterpart or has that aura, WOW. Miss Independent. A handful. We love seeing that *sprinkle, sprinkle* here. CEO. That's C-Suite energy!

This woman is someone powerful and dominant. Like a race horse you will always bet on because you KNOW, it will always come first 😉 (pun intended). She works very very hard for what she wants and similar to pile 1 she can be in accounting, finance and law. Good with numbers and her hands. I bet she has a dirty sense of humour.

From the first moment you see her you will know she is the real deal. Others blend in the background while she power walks in the room. Penetrating stare and red bottom high heels, her allure is different. She doesn't have to show dominance, others feel that she is the boss. Mami energy. Ferocious when someone comes for her loved ones. She could even be in law enforcement.

Red and brown. Symbolising high energy that's still grounded and serious. Do not cross her.

Pile 3

King Of Swords, Knight Of Wands, Ace Of Swords

Now, this one? A handful ! Try to tie her down. You just can't. A brat.

This person is very fluid. They don't care about terms and conditions. They are highly intelligent and her mind walks a thin line between spirituality and logic. The most unconventional, they will find a solution no one sees yet it's right in front of them. Highly intellectual and well versed in philosophy and math.

This reminds of a movie with James Franco where he played a start up founder who was into spirituality. A crazy genius. A party is a party and they will be there.

Partying in Ibiza? They've done that. Phuket for a Muay Thai Camp? That did that last year! Eiffel tower to try a croissant with pistachio filling? They just got back yesterday and guess what? They hate pistachios.

This person is the type to run a start up company focused on clean energy and when shit hits the fun they will call an astrologer and ask for recommendations. They respect everyone. They will listen to your mom and dad when they talk about their days and take mental notes of great ideas. They know great ideas come from the most unconventional places and fields.

Pile 4

Page Of Cups, Page Of Swords, The Fool (5 Of Swords + 8 Of Swords + 5 Of Pentacles flew out)

This can be my age difference pile. They will run you to the ground lol.

This is someone with lots of mental capacity. You ask them about World War II and they will tell you how Nazis and Churchill used astrology and why the war happened and after 5 hours you will be listening to them about Ancient Mesopotamia. "How did we get here?" You will think.

Well, it doesn't matter cause you love listening to their voice and their warm heartfelt laugh. They look innocent and pure and even if they try to intimidate you you will let them think they can but in reality they look like a cinnamon roll and they are a cinnamon roll. Their life was not the best and they have lots of trust issues. They may look innocent but their eyes hide a painful past. Like a kitten thrown out and left out in the cold they feel lost and unappreciated.

You listening to them means the world and you will be shocked at how appreciative they are and how loving with you. They are very romantic and they may have great expectations and daydreams about their love life.

I get that you might start off as friends and meet in a very random way on a daily run or while getting groceries or a tire changed. You will immediately fall in love with them and they will seem like they don't suspect a thing. Let me tell you, they know, they are just too scared to show their feelings and until you grab them and kiss em you won't know how much passion is brewing underneath this innocent and clever facade. They might turn into pile number 2 in a few years lol.

Ready for everything, you will always be a warm embrace and their home when they come back from exploration. You will love how they yawn while reading a book and how they stretch when they wake up showing revealing their tummy. They are cute to you, even if everyone else sees them differently, that's how you view them. They might be a black mysterious cat but you think of them as a tired little kitten waiting for a safe home that will accept them as they are.

#astrology #tarot reading #tarot #pick a card #pick a pile #pac reading #pick a photo #pick a picture #soulmate #future spouse

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sihtricfedaraaahvicius · 9 months

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Note: another jealous!Sihtric request, thank you, anon! :)

Warnings: 18+! smut/suggestive, jealousy, mention of alcohol.

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)

summary: Sihtric was your best friend, and you didn't know he was in love with you. So when he got all jealous and territorial, you didn't understand him.

wordcount: 2,4k

Masterlist

'She's with me!'

You: any plans for the weekend?

Sihtric: nope

You: wanna go see a movie?

Sihtric: yep

Sihtric was so easy going and down for anything, you loved it. The short haired Dane had been your best friend for years, since you had met him at Finan's birthday party one day. You thought he was incredibly handsome, but he was in a relationship when you first met, so you never tried anything. But you both just loved how you had many things in common.

A few months after you had met, Sihtric's relationship ended, but you were going on dates with other men every now and then, and as Sihtric never showed you that he had any romantic feelings for you, you just left it at being friends.

But you were both very single as of late, and you often went to see a movie together in the city. After that, he'd drive you home and you'd talk for hours in his car, or on your couch, before he went home himself. And you expected tonight would be just the same.

'Pretty lady,' Sihtric whistled when you opened the door, always being a flirt.

'Shut up,' you snorted and locked the door behind you.

'What are you all dressed up for? I thought we're just seeing a movie?'

'Well, yeah. But I saw this dress as I was clearing out my closet and it had the tag still attached. I had to wear it someday,' you said, 'why? Too much?'

'No,' Sihtric smiled and bit down on his lip when you looked away, 'not at all.'

'Well that sucked,' you laughed as you walked out of the movie theatre, 'nice one, Sihtric.'

'Well I'm sorry,' he laughed as hard as you did, 'I had no idea it would be this bad.'

'It literally said from the creators of Sharknado, and you didn't even consider the fact it might be… you know, just as bad?'

'Hey, I liked Sharknado!'

'Of course you did,' you rolled your eyes, 'I need a drink after this, I swear. Let's go to the pub,' you said.

Sihtric stopped walking and looked at you.

'You serious? You want to grab a drink now?'

'Hmm… why not?' you smiled, 'we never do that actually, why?'

'I don't know,' Sihtric shrugged, 'we just don't?'

Sihtric knew very well why he never had a drink with you in the city. You were simply drop dead gorgeous, and Sihtric was head over heels in love with you. He had been ever since the day he met you, and broke up with his ex because of you, but he never dared to make his move and was content with being your friend. More or less.

Whenever you went to the movies together, Sihtric noticed how many men, and women, eyed you up, and it angered him. He knew you would get a lot of attention if he took you to a pub now, and he also knew he would not handle it well. But now that you said you wanted to get a drink, he would take you for a drink. Anything to spend just another moment longer with you.

'Well, I'm all dressed up anyway,' you laughed, 'so why not? But you're buying because you made me sit through that horrible movie.'

'Fine,' Sihtric huffed with a smile.

And soon enough you stepped into a packed pub. Apparently the World Cup was going on, and England played against Denmark tonight.

'Shit,' you yelled over the loud drunk cheers, 'it's crowded here! And loud!'

'It's crowded and loud everywhere,' Sihtric said as he circled his arm around your waist, and leaned in to make you hear him, 'it's the weekend and they show football everywhere right now. We can go home if you want?' he tried to change your mind.

'No,' you shook your head, 'let's join this madness.'

You laughed and took his hand, dragging him along with you into the crowded pub.

Sihtric was going to have a rough night pretending not to be in love with you.

Sihtric handed you a drink and you noticed how he stood awfully close to you ever since you had entered the pub. Yes, it was crowded, but not that crowded. You weren't complaining though. Sihtric looked good tonight, just like any night really, with his hair recently cut and the sides shaved, showing off that sexy tattoo he had on his neck that ran up to above his ear. He was dressed in a simple shirt, showing off his toned arms, and he wore black jeans with sneakers underneath. And you accidentally matched, as you were dressed in a little black dress, showing off your legs and those new heels you recently bought.

'Do you even like football?' you yelled in his ear as he held you close.

'Not really,' Sihtric shrugged lightly to apologise, to which you smiled.

'Then I'll find someone else to cheer with!' you yelled and stepped away from him, in between the drunk football supporters.

Sihtric watched you carefully from a close distance, and he saw how you got offered one drink after another. His blood simply boiled whenever some guy pulled you in for a hug, or how they wrapped their arms around you as you all cheered when England scored a goal.

And he had enough of it.

Sihtric moved into the crowd, towards you, harshly shoving a few men away with his shoulder as he reached you and ended up standing next to you, his arm around your waist, pulling your side against his chest.

'Hey?' you frowned with a smile, not minding his embrace at all, but it surprised you, 'you okay?'

'Yeah,' Sihtric said as he looked around, seeing if he had to keep any other men away from you, 'you seem to be getting a lot of attention, miss. Just checking if it's not unwanted.'

'I'm fine, Sihtric,' you chuckled and looked up at him, and you noticed that something in his eyes had changed.

His eyes were always soft when he was with you. Kind and friendly, sometimes you even thought you saw a sudden spark in them when he listened to your endless rambling. But now, his mismatched eyes were dark and hard. There was a certain fire in them, and you didn't know what had lit it, or why, and you felt he held you even tighter against his chest when another man offered you a drink.

'If she wants a drink, I'll be the one to buy her,' Sihtric said sternly, not even giving you a moment to answer, and the stranger turned away from you.

'Damn,' you snorted, 'jealous much?' you grinned at the Dane.

Sihtric looked down into your eyes and clenched his jaw, but said nothing. Instead, his eyes trailed down to your lips, and something suddenly changed in the air as he had both arms around your waist now.

You noticed Sihtric leaned in, and without thinking, you did the same. But then a man bumped into you, pushing you away from Sihtric, and he spilled his beer over your bare legs and brand new shoes. Sihtric was quick to step back to you, pulling you against his chest while the man quickly apologised numerous times for drenching you with his drink.

'I am so, so sorry,' the man said, 'please, let me buy you a drink.'

'Oh,' you smiled, a little embarrassed, 'eh, sure-'

'She's with me!' Sihtric cut you off and pulled you with him towards the toilets, through the warm and loud crowd.

'Sihtric, what the hell?' you laughed, almost tripping over your heels because he walked too fast.

Sihtric closed the door to the toilets and grabbed as many paper towels as he could, while giving you a hard stare by looking at you as he looked in the mirror above the sink.

'Hey, what got into you?' you frowned at his sudden behaviour.

Sihtric said nothing, instead he kneeled down and took off one of your heels, cleaning your leg up as best as he could before he cleaned your shoe. And he repeated the same action on your other leg and shoe, until you were beer-free again.

Sihtric helped you back into your heels and you felt your cheeks heat up, as it was almost a Cinderella moment, you thought.

'Sihtric,' you said, 'say something? Why are you so… territorial?'

'Because men are looking at you,' he muttered as he threw the soaked paper towels in a bin, 'without any fucking respect.'

'What?' you scoffed, 'I- I'm sorry, but I really don't understand how that is your problem? Why do you get so worked up over that all of the sudde-'

'Because I want you!' Sihtric hissed and pinned you against the wall.

'W-what?' you breathed, his body pressed against yours as he stared down into your eyes, 'what the fuck are you talking about?'

'I… want… you,' he said slowly, almost threatening with the way he was all up in your face.

'Sihtric… since when are you like this? Or is this what you are usually like when you go out to a pub? No wonder your ex dumped you then, fucking hell,' you scoffed.

'I broke up with her!' Sihtric almost snarled, taking your face in his hands, 'because I couldn't keep my eyes off you,' he said, breathing down your mouth.

You looked at him, speechless, you didn't understand where this was coming from. But at the same time, you couldn't deny your own feelings for him either.

'Since… since when is this...' you stammered, and you felt his hands trail down your body, to your hips. And a pleasant feeling it was when he gave you a tug, pulling your hips firmly against his body.

'It's been this way ever since we first met,' Sihtric whispered and leaned his forehead against yours.

You stared into each other's eyes, until Sihtric simply couldn't keep himself together anymore. He took your hand, pulling you out of the toilets and back into the crowded pub, out the door. . And you didn't ask any questions, you knew what was going to happen and you had been desperate for it. Just like Sihtric.

Without a single word being said, you both got into his car and he drove you home, where you took his hand, dragging him with you towards your front door. And as soon as you had closed the door behind you, Sihtric picked you up in his arms, pushing your back up against the door as his lips finally crashed into yours, and his heated kiss made your head spin with regret that you never confessed your feelings for him earlier.

You kissed until you both ran out of breath, and took him to your bedroom, where Sihtric wasted no time in ripping off your clothes and you did the same to him. He picked you up again and threw you on your bed, and he was fast to climb on top of you. You kissed him eagerly, pulling his hair and biting his lips, which turned Sihtric into a wild beast. He growled and grabbed your wrists, sat back on his heels and pulled you up to him. You only communicated through soft moans, deep breaths and loud groans, which only intensified when you finally guided his hard length inside you. And you fucked, hard.

Both in love while also being hurt, and angry; both upset at yourself for hiding your feelings. For having to suffer through seeing each other with other people, while all you really wanted was to be together. And you both felt you had wasted years of your life, which you now had to make up for.

Sihtric flipped you over on your back and threw your legs over his shoulder as he thrusted into you, hard and fast, holding your thighs in a bruising grip. He simply had to fuck you relentlessly now. He'd make love to you later, when you had both calmed down after everything. Sihtric just needed you to know what he was capable of, that he could handle you, that he could please you. And he simply wanted to finally hear you scream his name as well.

You moaned loud at the new position he took you in, your back arched as Sihtric kept up his pace. His teeth bared and his eyes fixated on you, enjoying the way he had you now and how you seemed to love it all the same.

'Fucking cum for me, love,' Sihtric growled out of breath as he neared his own climax.

You couldn't bring out anything that made sense, and just before you felt the overwhelming, pleasant feeling you had longed for all these years, Sihtric pulled you back up to him. And you straddled his lap, just in time to feel him finish inside you with a deep, heavy moan as his fingers tangled in your hair and his lips rested against yours. You fucked him through his high as you reached your own, and you both fell back on the bed, wrapped in each other's arms, completely out of breath. And sore.

You laid there, all sweaty and cuddled up for minutes, until you both came down from your high and your heartbeats slowed back a normal pace.

'Fuck,' you sighed, and looked up at Sihtric, who was still more or less panting, his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead, and his tongue stuck out slightly between his parted lips.

He looked down at you, exhausted, but a half smile appeared on his face along with the sound of a chuckle.

'Yeah,' he breathed, 'that sure was a fuck.'

And you both laughed, until you knew the situation had to be addressed, and you had to gather the courage to bring it up.

'Where do we go from here?' you asked after a while.

Sihtric hummed, sleepily, while he traced his rough fingertips over your bare back as you rested your chin upon his chest.

'I just want to be with you,' he whispered, 'for you to be mine. I can't stand it anymore, seeing you with someone else. And if… if you don't want to be with me, then that's okay. I can't force you, but... then I can't keep seeing you,' he sighed, 'I can't keep pretending that I'm not in love with you, that it doesn't hurt me that you're not mine. That you're not my girl. I can't be just friends anymore, I'm… I'm sorry-'

'I don't want to be just friends anymore either,' you whispered as your fingertips drew meaningless figures on his neck, 'we've been pretending for far too long already.'

'Then be mine,' Sihtric said as he slowly sat up, cupping your cheeks, 'be mine only,' he smiled sweetly and nuzzled your nose before he kissed your lips, gently this time, 'just say it, my love. You know I'm yours already.'

'And I am yours, Sihtric,' you smiled, looking up into his mismatched eyes. And you saw that spark again, which you had seen so many times before, but you only understood it now; the fire inside him only burned for you.

taglist: @clairacassidy @finanmoghra @uunotheangel @hb8301 @bathedinheat @neonhairspray @anaeve @bubblyabs @travelingmypassion @sylas-the-grim @bubbles-for-all-of-us @andakth @bel-bottoms @willowbrookesblog @lady-targaryens-world @skyofficialxx @diosademuerte @elle4404 @alexagirlie @sweetxime @solango @gemini-mama @cheyennep3107 @little-diable @jennifer0305 @drwstarkeyy

#sihtric x reader #sihtric x you #sihtric kjartansson #the last kingdom #sihtric #tlk #sihtric fic #the last kingdom fic #modern!sihtric

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kisscara · 1 year

Text

O6. 1+ student council member! [fanboy!scaramouche x drummer!reader] ⎯⎯ heartbeat rhythm series

a/n: once again ignore the dates 3__3

"God, your hands are so soft even though you've been drumming for awhile," scaramouche mutters, his charming blue eyes now half-lidded as he runs his fingertips across every line of your palm. a tinted pink coats your face from the compliment. 'he must be drunk.' you sheepishly smile, "thank you, pres-"

"just call me scaramouche outside of school grounds. it's weird if you say that in public." scaramouche rests his head in his hand and takes another sip from his shot glass. "you're quite interesting, (name). are drums hard to play?" he asks, swirling the liquid in his cup.

kaeya is at the front counter looking for a waiter to get the check from while the girls are escorting a very wasted kazuha to kaeya's car in the parking lot. that left you with scaramouche at the table. "it can be a little bit of difficult and a little bit of easy at times. but with a lot of practice, i get the hang of it," you meekly reply.

suddenly, scaramouche leans in towards you, nearly closing the distance between the two of you completely. from this angle, you can see how flushed he appears. just how drunk is he? scaramouche tilts his head and you're sure that anyone looking at this scene from a certain perspective would think that the two of you were kissing.

"do you like me?"

at his question, your pupils dilate in surprise. "yeah, i mean, no, well yeah, i like you but not in that way, you know!..." you hurriedly stammer out words in a panic. scaramouche returns to a normal distance and chuckles, "don't worry, i was just joking. but seriously, i'd be lucky if someone like you liked me."

it's like the whole world stopped. you look at him with a brow slightly furrowed. what yanfei said couldn't possibly be true, could it? scaramouche keeps his gaze locked on his glass, waiting for a reply, anything at all but no, you couldn't get ahead of yourself yet.

"that's sweet, scaramouche! a lot of people at school already admire you, i'm sure one of them are your ideal type!" you cheerily exclaim, trying not to make the air around you two awkward. scaramouche sighs, "(name)-" amber calls out, "(name)! your ride is here, ayato's going to be picking you and ayaka up."

she stands in front of the table with her arms crossed. "hey, you didn't do any funny business with them while we were gone, did you!?" amber grumbles, pointing at scaramouche. you laugh while collecting your things, "he didn't do anything at all, amber. thanks for tonight, scaramouche."

you greet him goodbye with a wave and head outside the restaurant. scaramouche purses his lips in frustration. he should have been upfront with you about his feelings but he supposes he's moving too fast. you'd never know his glass was filled with water anyways.

tags: @mariusvonhangme @scaramoo @mikismusings @rizakari @akagism2 @sakiimeo @ohmyfinggod @aethersluvrr @scarafrisbee @kaoyamamegami @liliumaraneae @dreamsofminnie @starfart19 @kunisbeloved @luhvashh @makiswrld @kyouzki @mimissubway @loucaroarz @theblueblub @angelunatic @shinjuuz @thenightsflower @coquettemaiden @thefandomcrow @cotton-eee @lovely028 @hrtswinter @duckyyyx @kissingkzuha @dazaisboner @adeptusx @tomotofu @yukiipc @loverhole @star583 @soobasaur @aeongiies @dr8amy @scaraapologist @raideneiari @rvoulte @aaeng121 @pyrrhicgaze @tjjjrsj @enviouspeanut @d4y-dr3am3r @aromaticism @undecidingfate @idontwantoeatspicy

taglist is now closed as i've reached the max tags in a single post. (50/50 tags occupied + officially removed users whose names aren't linked)

what happens when you, a talented and well-known drummer across the web, grow an intense crush for the student council president, who's also your number one fan? from annoying sisters to nosy bandmates, the next event that happens is always more chaotic than the last!

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snaillock · 10 months

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heeyy^x^

i really like ur writings🤭 and i’m happy bc finally someone writes male reader stories

anyway!! i would like to request a sae x gamer/streamer m!reader fic, where the reader is a big gamer and also a twitch streamer, how did sae get along with that, how does sae take it when the reader doesn't pay attention to him because he's playing / chatting with his friends on discord🫣 sorry if i write something wrong english is not my first language😔 had a good day!!

sae itoshi x male!streamer!reader

tysm anon! i’m glad you enjoy my stuff! i also hope you enjoy this and that it’s to your satisfaction

tags: male reader, established relationship, jealous and overthinking sae, surprise! sae also sucks ass at communicating, also lowkey self-indulgent since i secretly dream of being a streamer, doing a different format than what i typically do

sae knows he’s being hypocritical but he simply can’t help it.

he saw the way you would hole yourself up in your office, streaming for several hours straight almost every day. sometimes you wouldn’t even get out to take a break.

you could’ve given yourself a much more laidback schedule thanks to sae’s success and wealth. instead you chose not to rely on him financially and prioritized your self-independence and stability. the only thing you really accepted from him career-wise was the massive clout boost that came with being his boyfriend. not to mention, you just loved the career path you chose, even if it did make you stressed sometimes. so you were more than fine with committing a lot of effort into it despite his insistence.

he understands and relates to how busy your lifestyle can get, yet he can’t help but feel a little neglected when he rarely sees you outside your office during the day and knows you don’t have much time free time to spend with him.

and perhaps he did feel jealous whenever he overheard you and your other streamer friends voice calling and playing games, laughing and cracking jokes with each other.

ugh he hated the idea that he could get jealous at all. he knows he should be more rational about this. he’s supposed to be the rational one! but he can’t help it. you’re his boyfriend! you should be spending your time with him. laughing and making jokes with him.

it’s gotten so bad that he even felt annoyed by your viewers fawning over you. he knew feeling a threatened by them was crazy because who the hell doesn’t know you’re sae itoshi’s boyfriend. anyone would be crazy to try to come in between that. plus he has plenty of his own simps going insane over him. so he of all people should be more than aware of what it’s like to be with someone who’s famous and very out there in the world. he should especially expect this when he’s dating such a good looking guy.

sae has rarely felt insecure about himself either. until his mind started spiraling and he manages to convince himself that he isn’t interesting enough to be with you compared to your gamer friends. he definitely doesn’t say anything to you about it since he doesn’t want you think he’s weak because of it. instead he lets those overcooked insecurities build up even more and more in his head until he starts believing them.

one day he noticed your office door slightly cracked open so he peeked his head in to see you streaming. which you then noticed from the corner of your eye.

“sae!” you spun your chair around to face him. you quickly took off your headphones, forgetting to mute the microphone, and held your arms out with a big smile. “come here baby!”

he was surprised and flustered from your enthusiastic response. how could he not be when he’s been living with those negative ideas about the relationship for a while that he’s gotten so used to them. he reluctantly walked over to you to which you wrapped your arms around his neck, making him bend down to your eye level.

“i’m so sorry i’ve been so busy lately,” you said before cupping his face and planting kisses on his cheeks. “i promise i’ll make it up to you.” his face softened as he felt his worries wash away thanks to your words and kisses.

“alright,” he nodded. everything’s going to be alright. he watched your screen from the corner of his eye as the live chat started going crazy, with a slight smirk on his face.

a.n: when i got this request, i was also working on a much bigger sae fic which should be coming out in a few days or so. it’s currently 2k+ words. so stay tuned and if anyone wants to be tagged when it’s posted, let me know!

i also don’t think i can post a fic without using read more. i always write so fucking much.

#★ snail.writes ★#sae itoshi #sae itoshi x reader #sae itoshi x male reader #blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock x male reader #male reader #scheduled #posting this while listening to weyes blood

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thyandrawrites · 7 months

Text

On "dream doping", or the lesson to be learned from despair

Alteratively titled: why breaking up with your high school sweetheart is vital for a career in soccer (with or without said sweetheart. Signed: Ego Jinpachi)

buckle up, this is a long one

We know that Reo went into this match with several hungups as to why Nagi would leave him behind, even going as far as asking Chigiri and Kunigami why they'd pick him

And his voice shaking (notice the wobbly speech bubble) as he repeats the validation, like he doesn't quite believe it to be true anymore. And then during the match he kept alternating between talking himself up and trash talking Isagi with increasingly frantic urgency. He needed to test his worth against Isagi and come out victorious to prove that he was worthy of being the genius' partner, yes, but one important factor is that he did all of this specifically seeking Nagi's approval. He needed to hear it from him, because it's Nagi's departure that crushes Reo's confidence in the first place. Before that moment, Reo was self-assured and cocky, even looking down on other players he felt were beneath him. But we could argue that confidence was born from a shaky foundation—the idea of staying a team with Nagi until the world cup and their eventual victory together for Japan.

I think a factor that doesn't often get brought up in Reo commentaries is that Reo derives a lot of his winning self-image from tag-teaming with a genius

And it's from "borrowing" his talent that Reo feels he lifts their collective value to genius level

And in the process, Reo also tends to undersell his own skills by comparison, and letting them stay an accessory to Nagi's brilliance,

despite how it's been remarked that Reo's a bit of a genius in his own light. If he honed that potential, he could be a big threat, too. Alone.

This is by design, of course. He foils pre blue lock Rin for this reason, too. Reo and young Rin are similar in that they both consider their soccer partner the true star of the show, subordinating their own skills as just a fancy accessory to make their partners shine and become world's best with them right at their heels.

The unfortunate consequence of this is that they end up internalizing that their dream is not achievable without their partner(s), because they ingrained being a sidekick so deep into that plan that they simply see themselves unwilling or unable to chase it on their own.

Hence why, for the continuation of their dream, it becomes vital to have their partner's approval. They just don't see the point in going on alone. Losing the partnership means losing the reason to play altogether.

Now, of course this mindset is incompatible with blue lock. Nothing really new there. Reo was always framed as the delusional oddball for signing up for the program with the intended goal of using it to make Nagi the best, rather than himself. In other words, for trying to bend the system into accommodating his dream rather than accepting Ego's philosphy and playing by Ego's rules. And of course, that plan was bound to be put to the test when Reo&Nagi got the first taste of "despair".

The series posits that despair is the feeling you get when your dream doesn't measure up to reality and threatens to crash and burn. Ego posits that there's only one way out of it that doesn't involve self-destruction. And that's avoiding the trap of the so-called "dream doping".

But what does "engraving despair" even mean in simple terms? I think Ego's point is that after experiencing a crushing, frustrating defeat, some players (the normies, or those who don't go very far) simply think "next time we'll win" without putting any active energy into changing their playstyle and rebuilding it anew to face the growing challenges and "devour" them along the way.

Think of Barou, and how he managed to come back after Isagi and Nagi made him effectively useless in the field. What Barou did was evolving into someone even more chaotic and unpredictable, and devouring them right back. Barou himself cites the despair he felt during that match as the catalyst of his growth and winning goal. In other words, instead of dream doping, Barou adapted and survived in a battlefield that would've otherwise left him in the dust.

But not every player has the presence of mind to pick themselves back up as the match is still unfolding, and when the defeats rolls around, they fold under the weight of that despair. We see this in action. When Sae evolves so rapidly in Spain and eats Rin for breakfast during their 1v1, Rin's reaction to despair is dream doping (at least at first). So is Reo's when he loses to team white. Faced with opponents that had an explosive soccer growth, they struggle to keep pace, and then refuse to face reality and admit they also need to change their playstyle to keep staying in the game.

In Reo's case, he even goes as far as saying he doesn't have "the courage to let himself be destroyed and reborn." And that defeatist attitude is what leads team white to choose Chigiri instead. A real egoist doesn't think "I cannot do it" but instead keeps fighting tooth and nail until the end.

But Reo isn't there yet. If you analyse his body language at the end of the match, it's clear he expects a rejection before it even comes. Notice his posture

Having just had a taste of the limits of his skills against strong opponents, his reaction is resigned. His stance is defensive and closed off. His arms and legs are crossed, he's the only one on the ground, his head is hung in defeat and avoiding Nagi's eyes. Even the camera angle looks at him from above, like he's already doomed himself by deciding to stay on the ground, not picking himself up. Remember, it's Kunigami who lifts him from his collar. Reo doesn't have that strength alone.

This transition here also shows it well imo. True to fashion, he only shows a reaction when Nagi's directly addressing him. A part of him is still wishing for things between them to mend, to go back to how they were. There's hope written all over his face in that second panel, but the moment he hears what Nagi has to say, it abruptly morphs into pain.

Nagi echoes the words Reo wanted to tell him when they split, but to Reo it doesn't come across as the approval he was seeking. Rather, as the opposite: while Reo couldn't bring himself to encourage Nagi to go ahead in fear that Nagi wouldn't look back (that is, in fear Nagi wasn't as attached to him and their dream as Reo was)... Nagi says them easily enough. And to Reo, that's more crushing than the loss itself because he misconstructs it as indifference towards their promise.

It all circles back to Reo's insecurity. While Nagi just showed him he's able to change even without Reo as his partner, Reo is insecure about being able to do the same because he sees them as his biggest weapon, not anything inherent to Reo alone. Thus, once Nagi mines the foundation of Reo's confidence (their team up), any step Nagi takes in an effort to get them closer to the world cup in Reo's eyes is just another step away from it (and from him). Reo always assumed they'd crossed that finish line together, that he'd build Nagi up into the world's best striker. He wasn't prepared for a path where Nagi teams up with other people, leaving Reo powerless in the sidelines—their combo (and thus himself) a weapon that outlived its usefulness.

Much like Rin declaring that he'd lose his reason to play soccer if he can't chase his dream with Sae the way they had agreed to, Reo metaphorically sees his future as the "abnormal monster duo" crumbling away (notice the decaying effect on the square with his internal narration). Instead of taking steps towards ensuring their dream still has a chance of happening in the future, he sees it as already doomed.

The thing is, Reo isn't ready to give up on it, though. He doesn't want to. I could be wrong about this but him seeking out a clean cut from Nagi came across to me less as if he was blaming Nagi for leaving, and more like he seeked a fight as self-punishment for his thoughts during the match. In the previous chapter, he tried stifling Nagi's potential and then resented himself for it. Now, his internal narration is almost goading Nagi's anger. I think it's still up in the air whether he was lashing out because he was overwhelmed by his conflicting feelings or if he was seeking out Nagi's rejection because he hated himself for not measuring up to his own standards during the match. Maybe a bit of both.

Point is, Reo is refusing to face reality. By saying "then pick me", to cite Ego, he's denying that he was powerless in the match, and putting the entire brunt of his loss onto Nagi's shoulders for not choosing him. Simply put, he's relying on Nagi to open up the door to go further in blue lock instead of growing into the player that gets to choose who to pick.

And Nagi recognizes this and feels hurt by it, cause if Reo refuses to evolve, switch up tactics and try new things, he's also implicitly refusing to go further in the program. From Nagi's perspective, it's Reo that's breaking their promise by being unwilling to put in the effort to keep staying in the game. Remember, the consequence for failing blue lock is no longer being allowed to play professionally for Japan. If Reo quit putting up a fight, his dream would be over for good.

And the story tells us, the measure of a great striker is how they react to the challenges thrown in their path. Nagi's growth happens specifically because he doesn't tie his success to Reo, but knows when to throw in other variables and when cooperating with Reo makes them stronger. In Nagi's eyes, their dream is not reliant on their combo, but their combo is a weapon that makes their dream achievable. Whereas Reo based his plan to get the world cup around his partnership with Nagi, and let his own skills lay dormant and underdeveloped cause he always defaulted to passing to Nagi to score.

But when Nagi leaves the equation for good, Reo's forced to address where his own strengths really lie and how to weaponize them to avoid elimination. That's why the chameleon awakens for the first time. It gets roused by Reo's despair, which gets "engraved" only when it dawns on Reo that their combo is not an option anymore, and it's on Reo and Reo alone to fight his way back up, evolving and devouring rivals along the way. And much like Nagi's talent for trapping, Reo's stregth was also inherent, and never just reliant on them being a team.

#blue lock #blue lock meta #episode nagi spoilers #mikage reo #nagi seishiro #nagi seishirou #reo mikage #episode nagi #bllk thoughts #this got way longer than I planned. sorry if it's messy

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delicatebarness · 3 months

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bring him home | chapter three

Summary: Tony finds out.

Warnings: MCU Spoilers. Captain America: Civil War & Endgame? Grief. Mentions of Murder, Death and Sex.

Word Count: I haven’t edited it just yet so not sure. I’ll update once I have.

Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Chapter Three Remaster

A/N: I wrote this chapter before even finishing Chapter Two. It broke me. Also, this was meant to be chapter four but I felt bad after not posting for a while and just letting this sit here so here you go.

Tags: @alastorsdarlingdoe | @whiminiferous | @armystay89 | @bucky-just-needs-love | @esposadomd

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED OR PUBLISHED TO ANY THIRD PARTY SITE OR APP. IF ANYONE SEES MY WORK ANYWHERE BUT HERE, IT HAS BEEN REPOSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION.

One Year.

Surrounded by Goats.

“How did Tony take it? You know, us being, well, us?” He questioned as he looked out to the Wakandian water, your head resting on his lap while you read. Sighing, you put your book to the side and sat up on your knees.

“He doesn’t know.” You played with a loose thread on his sling as you whispered the confession to him.

“What? Wait, you haven’t told him?” Bucky cupped your face which his hand, moving you to look at him. “Where does he think you are?” You move your hands around, gesturing towards Wakanda. “Why does he think you’re here?”

“I told him I’ve been coming here to meet up with Shuri,” You smiled remembering how grateful you were to T’Challa for opening Wakanda to the world, not only helping provide resources to other countries but also for giving you an excuse to tell your dad. “We’ve been working on a tech thing,” you move your hand over to Bucky’s armless shoulder. “Which, isn’t a lie.”

“You just left out the part that you’re sleeping in a hut, surrounded by goats, with an armless 100-year-old man?” Laughing, he shook his head at you while you just nodded at him.

It Still Wants Him.

“I lost a lot of loved ones,” you sighed as you looked around the small circle of group members attending today. “I lost a lot of friends, co workers, my brothers, I thought I had lost my dad at first and I also lost the love of my life.” You hadn’t realised your dad standing in the shadows of the entrance. His head was down as he listened to his child heartbroken over loss. The one life experience he couldn’t protect you from or heal. He wanted to see how your idea was working out, he wanted to see how you were helping people while you yourself have not yet been helped.

He was shocked to hear you say “love of your life.” He racked his brain on who you could be talking about, as far as he was aware, you didn’t care about romantic relationships. The others in group knew who you were, knew you lost friends, family, co workers and your brothers. Yet, they too were just as confused as your dad had been to learn this information. They had never seen you in any tabloids in regard to romance. Surprisingly considering who raised you.

They were asking all the same questions your dad was thinking. “What was their name?” “When did you know they had disappeared?”

“His name was James,” No, your dad thought, it can’t be. “Everyone knew him as Bucky, but, he liked it when I called him James.” He stared at you through the shadows, debating if he should storm in and demand to know the truth. He didn’t need to, you carried on speaking. Freely, opening about it all, all he could do was listen. “And, I watched him disappear after fighting Thanos.”

“I have never met anyone like him in my life. So calm and patient. It felt like a connection the second our eyes met for the first time. He was funny, charming and just all-around a nice guy. He had a lot of trauma but he worked hard to grow from it. He meant more to me than anyone could imagine.” You sighed, rubbing your left arm subconsciously. “There was a lot of tough times at the beginning, especially when you consider how we met and the complexity of us just knowing each other. But, I couldn’t imagine anyone else filling the space in my life like he did. I wished for him to be the man I grew old with, built a home with, possibly had children with.” You wiped a tear that started falling with your shelve. This was when you noticed your dad, you made direct eye contact with him and you had never felt so small under his gaze. Disappointment. That’s what you were. “Anyway,” you choked as you carried on, not dropping his gaze. “I knew us being together would have hurt so many people. That was the last thing I ever wanted to do. But, the heart wants what it wants and my heart, wanted him.” This was when you dropped his gaze and looked around at the fellow group members. “It still wants him.”

After the last member had left the sports hall of Midtown, you followed them into the schools parking lot. You lifted your head to notice your dad leaning against your car with his hood up. With a deep breath, you walked towards him.

“I don’t want to hear it.” You spat before he could open his mouth, you tried to open your car door but he slammed his hand against it. “Dad, please, I don’t want to hear it.”

“You’re sleeping with a murderer.” It was as if he hissed at you, anger spat like venom as he looked down at you.

“I’M A MURDERER.” “And in case you forgot what happened a year ago, I’m not sleeping with him anymore.”

“Y/N he killed-“

“I understand you’re still hurting, Dad. I would be too if it was you and Pepper.” He saw the pain you still carried from only ever hearing stories about them but never getting to meet them yourself in your eyes, there was also the love you had for a man you grew to know as himself and not a killer. “But, it wasn’t him. Surely, with that genius mind you’d be able to comprehend that.” His head dropped with a sigh. “He loved me, he was kind to me, he made me happy. Isn’t that enough for you as my dad? Not as an avenger or a son? Just, my dad?”

“It’s all I’ve ever wanted,” Looking back up, reaching his hand out to wipe a stray tear from your cheek. “You to be happy.”

“I miss him, dad, I miss him so much.”

Pulling you into his arms placing a hand on your head, allowing you to sob into his chest.

“I know, Kid, I know.”

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #catws #dad!tony stark x daughter!reader #falcon and the winter soldier #bucky fanfic #bucky x female reader #cacw #endgame #avengers endgame #the avengers x reader #tony stark x reader

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mountymase · 1 year

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invisible string - part one

“I guess you’re Summer’s mum?”

pairing: reader x mason mount summary: It’s been you and your daughter until life decides to prank you by putting her dad back into your life. The only problem is that he doesn’t know he’s her dad. warnings: fluff, a bit of angst, a bit of swearing. author: I randomly had this idea on my way to work and thought it’d be nice to write. Happens a bit before the World Cup, but I’ve changed some stuff to fit the story. Remember, this is fiction. Part two will come with some Masey smut. word count: 1.288k tagging: @football1921 // @pulisicsgirl // @bgfgm // @yungbludz // @mjij123 // @charlessgf // @slightlyrecklessserande // @lovelynikol16 // @thoseboysinblue // @dinonuggiesforliferz // @lovingtidalwavepizza // @she-lives-in-her-dreams

“Mummy, ice cream after ballet?”

How could a wrong choice in life lead you to this? To her? Almost four years later and it still overwhelmed you, because you never thought you had that special thing that’d make you a mum, but somehow, you managed it just fine — with extra help from your family and friends, definitely, but at the end of the day it was just you and Lily. And her fish, of course. The only pet you allowed her to have for now, so she’d start to have some sort of notion of responsibility.

“We’ll see about that, kid. Maybe if you eat all your dinner first?”

Lily sighed, as if she had the most complicated life, full of tough decisions. “Fine, mummy. Can Summer come too?”

Summer, the ballet bestie you never met because you always dropped Lily at ballet earlier than the other kids normally arrived, and she was gone before you went back to the studio to pick up your daughter. You only knew what she looked like because one day Lily came home with a cute Polaroid picture of the two of them, taken by Miss Albright, the teacher. Your heart melted a little at how adorable that was, the two girls hugging each other, tiny chubby arms around each other and big smiles on their faces — you could even swear they looked alike, maybe that was a bestie thing.

“Well baby, first I have to meet her mummy and make sure she trusts me, so she feels safe to leave her baby girl with me…”

“Just like you do, mummy?” You nodded, a big proud smile on your lips at how easy Lily understood things. “My legs are tired.” She said, completely changing the subject and stretching both arms at you so you could carry her.

“A ballerina with tired legs? Oh my!” You giggled, not being able to ignore how adorable your daughter was when she wanted you to carry her.

“I played footy at school today, mummy, I’m tired.” As Lily yawned, your heart skipped a beat. “Mr. Martin said I’m good.”

Of course you are, baby girl… you thought. Instead, you just nodded, kissing her temple as you walked inside the ballet studio and a smiley Miss Albright welcomed both of you. It was an open class today, to the mums and grandmas, aunts too, to celebrate the beginning of recital rehearsals — Lily’s first. You’ve found your best friend and your mum chatting and once Lily finally noticed they were there, she clapped her hands and gave an impatient little wriggle, and you let her go as she rushed to them with those tiny chubby legs, apparently not tired anymore. What an adorable little shit that girl was, with her golden retriever energy.

Like her daddy, who had no idea about her existence.

A soft poke on your shoulder woke you up from your thoughts and you turned around to face a heavily pregnant woman accompanied by, apparently, her mum, considering they looked a lot like each other. They were both smiling at you, and the youngest pointed at your daughter, who was now hugging a little girl.

“Are you Lily’s mum?”

“Guilty.” Taking another look at the two little ballerinas, you frowned at how indeed they looked alike. It was easy to identify that one. “I guess you’re Summer’s mum?”

“Jasmine, but you can call me Jaz.” You shook hands, smiling at each other. “And this is my mum, Debbie.”

“It’s lovely to finally meet you. Lily never shuts up about Summer.” You giggled, thinking of the never ending talks about how your daughter’s ballet bestie is the… best.

It was easy being around them, and your mum and best friend got along just fine with Jaz and Debbie, plus, Summer was indeed a sweetheart. One of the most adorable kids you’ve ever met, so polite and loving you just wanted to squeeze her as you usually did with Lily.

The rehearsal went on fine, full of the cuteness of 4 year old girls in baby pink tutus. You were happy to be there, happy that you took the afternoon off from work so you could be there seeing how happy your daughter was as she occasionally waved between clumsy pliés and pirouettes. Nonetheless, she was a natural, and you weren’t being too biased — as a ballet dancer herself, your best friend made sure to point out all the right things Lily was doing. You couldn’t help letting a shy tear roll down your cheek because although you had the most incredible support system for the past 4 years, only you knew how tough it still was raising that girl.

Especially when she asked about her daddy.

Once the rehearsal ended, you spotted Lily yawning and blinking heavily, but you knew she’d remember the ice cream. Sometimes, you couldn’t negotiate nor change the little one’s mind, and she got all that stubbornness from you.

“Mummy…” she started, and you took her in your arms, pressing soft kisses all over her face as she giggled.

“I know, my little monster. I didn’t forget your ice cream.”

When you invited your mum and best friend for dinner, they both apologised over and over, saying their time off had been exclusively to Lily’s rehearsal and they had to go — your mum, to your dad, because even after 30 years together they just couldn’t stay away from each other; and your best friend, back home, because she needed to finish an essay for uni.

That was when, kindly, Jaz invited you for Italian at a place she loved and Lily didn’t have to convince you, because the truth was you were dying to see your daughter and her best friend interacting as if they were two adults.

Now, you’ve found yourself happily chatting with Jaz and Debbie between observing Lily and Summer talk and giggling as they share a colouring book.

Bonding with Jaz was easy, and Debbie was also very sweet. You found out that Lily and Summer almost shared a birthday, with your daughter being just a few days older than hers; that you both had big families although you were an only child, while Jaz had three siblings but she kept that part private, which you didn’t mind as she was so respectful not asking about Lily’s dad when you said it was just the two of you living on a flat.

“And Moana, mummy.” The fish, your daughter added, to which you just nodded.

When you said your goodbyes, Debbie kindly invited you and Lily over on Saturday for lunch, so the girls could spend a day together, playing, something they didn’t get the chance to do yet.

“Jaz will have her mocktail and I can make us some mojitos, Y/n.”

Lily’s pleading eyes and pout easily convinced you.

“We’d love that, Debbie.”

You exchanged phone numbers and Instagram accounts, but it was only on Saturday morning, when Jasmine texted you her address that you decided to take a look on her insta. You smiled at a picture of Summer in a tutu and of another where the little one was in the middle of her parents, smiling, tiny arms over their shoulders.

But you wish you had never met Jasmine when you found a picture of her entire family and that familiar face was on your screen. You dropped your phone, your vision blurred, your head was spinning and you felt the urge to vomit. You wanted to cry. You wanted to scream. You wanted to run away and start a new life somewhere no one would know you and your daughter.

Jasmine was Mason’s sister.

Mason Mount.

Mason… Lily’s father.

*********

bonus: social media

yourusername

Liked by yourbestfriend, jazbenham and others

yourusername Time, could you please go a little slower? My favourite ballerina!

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yourdadsinsta I get the feeling. Can’t wait to be with this little one on Sunday! Hugs from grandpapa x

yourusername Lily said all the smooches to her grandpapa and she can’t wait to see you too.

jazbenham the best of all besties, she’s so cute! Glad I finally met you two x

PART TWO

#mason mount fanfic #mason mount x reader #mason mount imagine #mason mount x y/n

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legitalicat · 4 months

Text

Out of Time

Chapter 4 - "Eldest Son to Eldest Daughter"

an: I am so glad people are enjoying this story! I've been playing with this concept for nearly a year now. I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much! I want to go ahead and put this out there. I have borderline personality disorder and quite a few other mental illnesses, so all of that influences relationships in my life, which is reflected a lot in this story. Also this is not canon Aegon. This is a version of Aegon that lives permanently in my head.

If you love this header go check out zaldritzosrose for more amazing work! She is tagged on the series masterlist and on my welcome post!

Find the series Master list here!

Summary: Being the eldest child of the Queen or King is a weight many did not understand. It is a weight that dictates her every choice, ruling her heart and mind. Aegon, understanding the feeling, gives her the gift of a connection she could not have with another person.

TW: Very blatant mental health struggles, Substance Use (I added 🍃 into this world cause it not being in there is unrealistic), talks of alcoholism, religious talk, mentions of injury, self image issues, bad parents, divorced parents, moon tea, Aegon is so in love with reader it makes me ache

Relationships: Aegon Targaryen ii x Velaryon!Reader, past Aegon Targaryen ii x Helaena Targaryen

Word count: 3.7k

When I woke up this morning, only to find Jace gone from my bed and a cup of moon tea on the table, all I wanted was to hide away from the world. But there was more to my life than just Jace and Aemond. I had others who loved me, who had missed me this entire time. With that in mind, I dressed for the day in a simple lilac colored dress, drank the tea in one quick gulp, and had Ser Erryk escort me to Helaena’s chambers.

Her and Aegon’s children were with him for the morning. With both of them still happily in the Red Keep, I suppose it made sharing their children’s time easier. Though I don’t believe there has been a situation such as this ever. Most marriages that ended in annulment happened because there weren’t children from my understanding. Though until now I had not known of anyone who had gotten an annulment.

“How did my mother grant the end of your marriage?” I couldn’t help but ask Helaena. We were working on our cross stitching together. It was an activity that soothed her and I was all the happier to make sure she was calm. “Doesn’t the Faith typically have to be in agreement? And I mean, you two had three children together, wouldn’t they just deny it?”

Helaena chuckled. “I often times forget how little you and your brothers paid mind to the teachings of the Seven,” she said to me.

Fair enough, I suppose. Technically speaking, we are followers of the Seven. Yet anyone with eyes knew that we only did it because we kind of had to. I don’t believe Mother or Laenor had any vested interest in their teachings. They certainly never passed anything on to us outside of the bare minimum. I know my father’s family believed in the Seven, but since he was never allowed to claim us, he had no right to teach us his beliefs. In truth I only knew anything about them from Alicent.

“So explain it to me as though I’m five,” I said, shrugging a bit.

“It is unholy to hold one in a marriage against their will. Aegon and I were so young when we were married, and it was done under the misguided notion that your mother and family may seek to squash any competition for the Throne, so it was not difficult to make a case for it to be an unlawful marriage. Though I do feel that Rhaenyra may have reminded the Septon that he can be and would be a delicious snack for Syrax should he not see reason,” she told me. The smile that played at her lips as she thought of it was enough to make me smile.

“And what is it you wish to do now?” I asked her.

“I am perfectly content to live my life here. I love my family, I love my home. Though I do wish my mother had bothered to ever understand me,” she explained.

My smile fell from my lips. Time changed many things but Helaena’s distance from Alicent didn’t seem to be one. It was unfortunate, truly, as Helaena was wonderful. She may be more into bugs than most people, she may have her dreams and episodes, but she was not mad. In fact when actually making an effort to know her, one could find she was the opposite.

I had always wished I could see the world Helaena does. The world that I live in is dark and dreary, a place where one loses any semblance of a father before they even understand how great they are. It is a place where most everyone prefers men over women, despite the women being capable and strong in their own right. The world I live in? It is not a place built for Helaena.

Yet the one she lives in? People are praised for what they have done. There is no consideration other than who truly is right and just. Even in the darkest moments in which her mother tried to keep her from being who she is, my mother always gave safe passage to her sweet sister. Helaena paid no mind to those who were insignificant unless they hurt her family or her bugs.

It Is not to say she is naïve. In fact, I would think she sees more truth than any of us. But being the third child, born after an eldest daughter and eldest son, is very different than being the eldest. She did not have to fight to prove she was worthy like Mother did. And she does not have to step away because she knows she would not be accepted over her brother as I do…

I was born approximately two hours before Jacaerys. A long time between twins as I’ve been told, but enough time there was no doubt about who came first. Truthfully to my mother I don’t think it mattered which of us was born before the other. We are twins and therefore she always gave us the choice.

She explained to me that her father had named her heir before he had any other living children and never looked back. Once Aegon was born, most expected Viserys to change his mind. But he remained steadfast in his decision, never caring if Mother still wanted it. To this day I don’t know if she did. As such, she wanted to make sure we always had a choice.

“You’re doing it again,” Helaena said softly.

When I looked to her, she nodded her head to my hands. I had been so completely lost in thought that I didn’t notice I had repeatedly pricked my fingers with the needle I was using. Blood seeped through the fabric in several dots scattered around.

“Sorry,” I muttered before sitting the cross stitch down. Standing, I walked over to the bowl of water that was kept for washing her hands and dunked my fingers in it a few times.

“Our mothers are planning a feast to celebrate your return,” she told me as I turned back around. “I think it will happen week’s end.”

Naturally. It seemed they always found a reason to celebrate me. On my name day, it was always me who got doted on. Jace got put in the shadows, not that he seemed to mind much though. When I claimed Vhaela, only a few weeks before I disappeared, it was a much brighter occasion than Aemond claiming Vhagar. When I returned to King’s Landing, it overshadowed the tourney being held for Aegon to celebrate his own name day.

It was never my Intention, truly. Those around me just deemed me important. I had never wanted to be the center of attention. All I wanted was to do right by my family. Never have I sought out great fortune or the throne for myself, though technically it should be mine by birth order. All I craved was love.

“Are you happy?” I asked her, trying to change the subject.

“Yes. Aegon is a wonderful father, but he could never love me. And I do not love him,” she told me.

Before I was given the chance to respond, the chamber doors opened. Helaena’s children ran to her. The twins, Jaehaera and Jaehaerys, were nearing twelve at this point. They looked it, too. If you were to ask me, Jaehaera looked like Alicent but with the typical Targaryen silver hair and violet eyes. Jaehaerys and Maelor, who was nearing eight, were carbon copies of Helaena. They had the same curl to their hair as she did, their noses equally as small and rounded.

As the three children excitedly talked about their morning, I quietly excused myself from the room. While she would never say anything, there was not a place for me with Helaena and her children by myself. Those kids don’t remember me, though I remember Helaena’s every letter describing them in their early years. For both pregnancies, there was not a movement they made inside her that did not warrant a letter to me. But that was then.

In the corridor, Aegon stood and spoke with Ser Erryk. Erryk had a twin too, named Arryk. From what I remembered, Arryk and Aegon were quite close, the former taking on the watching over of the latter once Aegon hit puberty.

“Beautiful kids,” I said to him, offering a small smile. When he looked to me and smiled, I couldn’t help but blush a deep red.

“Thankfully they take more after Helaena,” he said to me. He stepped closer to me, extending a hand to rest under my chin. I swallowed hard as he tilted my face around in the light. “You should perhaps be more careful.”

“I shall keep that in mind,” I said, unable to hide my chuckle.

“Where are you headed to? I could join you,” he suggested as he offered his arm to me to take, dropping his hand from my chin.

“I was just going to head back to my room. Truly, Aegon, there is no need to bother yourself,” I told him.

“My darling, there is never a bother when it comes to you.” His voice was light and airy, as though the words he spoke were just the most casual thing in the world. But there was a firmness to them that I truly believe only he could accomplish.

It wasn’t so much a demand. He was not like Aemond, demanding and sure of himself. He was not like Jace, either, in being soft and guiding always. Aegon was something entirely different.

He had always seemed arrogant. He was the first born son so it was natural that he grew into believing he deserved everything he wanted. But only when you spoke to him when everything else was quiet did you ever get the truth.

He had never been much more than a scared little boy. There were frequent talks of what he feared would happen when Viserys had died. He had always been scared his mother would try to force him to take the Throne. When he was betrothed to Helaena, he was scared he wouldn’t be good enough for her. He was scared that I would grow to hate him, completely ignoring that I could never hate him.

The closeness I shared with Aegon was something that bordered on secretive. While it wasn’t that we felt the need to hide, as there truly was never anything to hide, it was what made him comfortable. He would come to me late at night when he could not sleep. I think it is when he felt safest. Even when we were children he preferred the night.

It was in the night that he saw beauty in his life. He didn’t struggle as much then to resist drinking, which had always seemed backwards to me but he swore it. The pressures that were placed upon him from Otto and Alicent didn’t exist at night. The person he truly is was enough for the shadows of darkness.

Perhaps it is my own cockiness but I like to think I see a side to him that others don’t. When we were alone I got to hear him sing. I don’t think anyone else knew he liked to sing let alone how good he was at it. The first time he ever sang me a song that he had picked up in a tavern, tears sprang to my eyes. And when he isn’t drunk, he is quite smart. He knows politics even better than Aemond. He knows how to get people to like him and trust him, a rare commodity in this world.

And if Helaena says he is a wonderful father, I have no doubt about it. I remember him writing to me the first time Helaena was pregnant. He was so happy and excited, determined to be better to his children than Viserys ever had been to him. When I had come back to King’s Landing, while he still struggled with the drink, he was so devoted to making sure they didn’t see it.

“I would be glad to have you along,” I said, smiling at him. Though I didn’t take his arm. He merely nodded at me and followed me, allowing me to set the pace in which we walked.

As we walked, we walked in silence. Our footsteps echoed off the stone walls, the small ching and squeak of Ser Erryk’s armor followed behind us. I was perfectly comfortable.

We got to my room in just a few minutes as it wasn’t far from Helaena’s. Ser Erryk took his place beside my door. I gave him a small smile and nod before leading Aegon into my room.

He took a seat in a chair in front of the fireplace. He seemed like maybe he ran cold, always choosing to sit close to fires or walking around wrapped in a blanket. I was like that too, of course, much to the hatred of Jace when we shared a room still.

“I am happy to see you home, have you need of anything?” he asked me when I sat in the chair next to his.

“I merely wish there was something I could take for the pain that wasn’t milk of the poppy. The way it muddled your father’s mind has made me certain I will never use it,” I told him simply.

He nodded softly and reached his right hand up his left sleeve. “In case you have not been told, I want you to know I am sober now. Have not had a sip of wine since the night you disappeared,” he told me.

“Aeg, that’s amazing. I am so proud of you,” I said as my heart felt like it was going to burst.

Truly I don’t think he had ever stood a chance against being a drunkard. Mother told me a long time ago how Viserys was giving Aegon wine by his second nameday. I never could understand why Alicent was so okay with that, especially because for my entire life she had yelled at him for being drunk. Like the night Aemond lost his eye, Aegon got blamed for not protecting him because even at thirteen he went and got so drunk he passed out on the steps. How on earth did she go from so passively allowing him to drink when he was a baby to being so vile about his problem?

He looked at me, his face saddened for a split second before he grinned and pulled out a pouch. “The Grand Maester told me to use this. It’s hemp. Mostly used for creating things, building and whatnot. But someone at the Citadel found if you consume it, it gives you what they call a high. But it is gentler on the health than being drunk. I’m not sure the process but they cook it into butter and then can bake it into things.”

He opened the pouch and pulled out a biscuit the size of his palm. He split it in two and offered me half. It didn’t look abnormal or smell any different. The biscuit looked very appetizing though.

“Do I just eat it?” I asked him, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes. But start slow. Too much at once and you’ll be completely incapacitated. Just a small bit should help your anguish, both physically and mentally,” he explained. “It will not be immediate like milk of the poppy. But it will be effective.”

Cautiously, I took a bite, eating on a quarter of my half. This was something I would never have done on my own. Yet Aegon had never truly steered me wrong, always seeming to have my best interests at heart.

After he took his own bite, eating a little more than I did, a silence fell between us as he just watched the flames. Aegon sometimes seemed like he wished that the world would open and swallow him whole. The way he would avoid looking at me, or anyone for that matter, spoke volumes about how uncomfortable he was even if nobody else realized it.

I remember once he told me that if he didn’t look at people he could convince himself they weren’t looking at him. When I tried to point out that wasn’t right he just put his hand over my mouth so that I couldn’t. It was that moment I realized how alike he and I are.

I escaped the duties of being Mother’s eldest child by pretending I wasn’t. Stepping aside so that Jace could be heir and acting as though I was okay with it was the biggest way I accomplished this. If I were honest, I wanted to be Queen, not Queen Consort. Hiding that fact from everyone, including my twin, repeatedly affirming his place as the next King essentially robbed me of a piece of my identity and forced me into a new one. One in which I was meant to stand by his side and have his children.

Aegon liked to hide from being the eldest son by pretending he didn’t exist. He didn’t just refuse those duties. He simply treated them as though they weren’t real. He used to disappear rather frequently for a few days at a time, only to be found in a tavern or a brothel and dragged back to the Keep. He had always been so drunk he never remembered his time there.

“I missed you,” he said quietly. “I know you never felt for me the way you did Jacaerys, or even Aemond. But you are probably the only woman I’ve ever loved.”

He didn’t look at me when he said it which made me wonder why he did. It seemed silly to me how badly I wanted him to look at me. My entire life I felt like I had been begging Aegon to look at me.

He was right, I never felt for him the way I did Jace or Aemond. But he was the first person that ever made me blush. He was the first person who I considered marrying for any reason. He was my first crush and I think that for a lot of people that was a pretty sacred role.

I wanted a dragon so badly because of his relationship to his own dragon, Sunfyre. I don’t remember exactly when they came together, only that Aegon claimed Sunfyre just as I claimed Vhaela. And they were a sight to see together, having potentially the strongest bond of any dragon and rider. I swear Aegon could be hundreds of leagues from Sunfyre, merely think of needing him, and Sunfyre would go there without a second thought.

There was also the fact that they were very beautiful together. Sunfyre was perhaps the most beautiful dragon to ever exist. His scales were a dazzling, glittering gold while his belly and wing membranes for a soft pink. When he stood tall, he looked like a perfect golden statue.

Aegon was the epitome of Targaryen beauty. His silver blonde hair was not as long as Aemond’s, but was chin length and began curling near the end. He had the classic Valyrian lilac eyes that sparkled in the firelight. He had a square jawline and lips fuller than Aemond’s. He was about five inches taller than me, and therefore Jace since he was my height, at about five foot ten, and just two inches shorter than Aemond.

He truly was a beautiful mixture of Jace and Aemond. His eyes, hair, and eyes were soft in such a way they drew me in. Yet his jawline was sharp like he was chiseled in stone. One could argue all the gods in the universe came together to create the perfect man in him.

I became very aware I was staring at his lips. My cheeks became hot as the blood rushed to them. He turned to look at me, a small goofy smile on his face when he saw me looking. It caused my cheeks to become even hotter.

“You’ve been staring for quite a while, how are you feeling?” he asked me.

“Fine,” I said as I shrugged.

My feet didn’t quite feel right though. Like they didn’t really exist but they do exist. He chuckled at something, I’m guessing my face, and I could feel a giggle bubbling up in my chest.

“Oh you feel it,” he told me, grinning.

“You’re pretty,” I whispered, leaning towards him. “Have I ever told you that?”

“Pretty?” he asked.

Slowly, I nodded. He was pretty. But not the way Mother or Helaena was pretty in an elegant and sophisticated way. He was the type of pretty like fire. One that was dangerous and wild, where I couldn’t quite guarantee I would make it out alive.

“You’re pretty, too,” he told me quietly.

I think he was the only one to ever call me pretty. Aemond called me beautiful and Jace called me perfect, yet never pretty. Except the times they called me pretty during sex, that is. Being pretty in the mundane was something special to me. It was like I was a flower or even a star.

He reached out and took my hand. We sat in silence for a while. There was no way I could tell how long we sat there, just looking at each other while saying nothing. It felt nice in a way I could not explain.

“My darling pretty girl,” he whispered, rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb. “How is your pain?”

“Better, thank you, Aegon,” I whispered.

My heart was light in my chest. It fluttered rapidly, my cheeks heating up once again. He was looking at me like I was precious to him.

He stood from the chair, moving to stand in front of me. The flutters turned to a steady pounding. It was beating in my ears loudly. Aegon didn’t say anything before he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to the tip of my nose, something that he had done when we were kids.

“I will ask the Maesters to prepare you the same biscuits. I do not like to think of you in pain,” he whispered to me. “And it may help if your thoughts get to be too much.”

Without saying another word, he took his leave. He walked out of the room, leaving me to sit alone with only my thoughts of him.

#dividers by benkeibear #aegon targaryen ii #aegon targaryen x reader #helaena targaryen #mental illness in fiction #out of time

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m-jelly · 11 months

Note

hi m-jelly.... how are u doing? if its not a bother may i request a levi and a female reader fic whereas levi loves her breast so much. like he likes to be poked by them and even requested reader to titty-fuck him. like i never seen a fic with levi receiving a titty-fuck... please please please... thank u in advance, have a great day my favorite writer!

So soft

Pairing: Levi x Fem!Reader

Genre and tags: Modern AU, detective Levi, established couple, breast touching, breast kissing, praise, titty-fucking, romance, kissing.

Concept: Your boyfriend, Detective Levi Ackerman, has been having a hard time at work with a lot of cases. You want to help him relax. You let your man touch, massage and kiss your breasts before you use them on his cock and let him enjoy how soft they are.

@ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @2moth-anon2 @cypidity @notgoodforlife @nbinairyn @demonsimp6

Levi stumbled into his apartment and groaned. He slipped off his shoes and hung his coat up. He was tired, aching and he was wet from the rain. He wanted a week off or more. He was done with the world and wanted just some peace and quiet.

He dragged his legs as he walked into his bedroom and found you inside putting away some laundry. He felt all his troubles wash away when he saw you, the love of his life. He walked up to you and pressed his face into your breasts and hummed.

You hummed a laugh and petted your boyfriend's head. "Hello, my love. That bad of a day?"

"Mm."

"I'm sorry you've had a shitty day."

He pulled back and stood up straight so he could look down into your beautiful eyes. "I love you."

You linked your arms around his neck and kissed him. "Love you too." You nuzzled your nose against his. "Why don't you have a nice hot shower, get changed and meet me in the living room. I have an idea to help relax you."

"Okay." He kissed you. "You're the best."

"I'll get something out for you to wear."

Levi squeezed you as he kissed your cheek making you giggle so sweetly. He hurried to the bathroom and relaxed under the hot water. He massaged your shampoo into his hair to give him comfort. Anything and everything to do with you comforted him. You were everything to him.

He dried off and felt his heart flutter at his comfy clothes being neatly placed on the bed. He pulled on his jogging bottoms and shirt. He moved out of the bedroom to see a hot tea waiting for him, along with a freshly baked cookie and what looked like lube.

Levi sat on the sofa and picked up the lube and read it. "Sweetheart, what's going on?"

You sat next to Levi and smiled. "Something fun."

Levi looked over and blushed hard at seeing you in lacy panties, stockings and no bra. He felt himself drooling as he pressed your breasts together and up. "B...B...B...B..."

You giggled. "Boobs, yes. Would you like your tea and cookies fed to you?"

He gulped hard. "P-Please."

You picked up the teacup and blew on it. "So hot."

"Very hot."

You dipped the cookie into the tea and offered it to Levi. You smiled as he bit it. "Mm, yummy, right?"

He nodded as he felt like he was on cloud nine. "I-It's good."

"I baked them today just for you."

"Th-thank you."

You held the cup up and admired him as he drank from the cup. "Nice?"

He sighed and relaxed. "Yes. So, umm..."

You put the cup down and threw your legs over his left thigh. You rubbed his chest and purred at him. "You are curious about what I have in store for you?"

"Yes."

You slowly lay back on the sofa and opened your legs. "My breasts are all yours.

Levi's eyes widened in delight. "All mine?"

"Yes."

He dove for your chest and nuzzled your breasts. "So soft." He massaged them and marvelled at how hot they were. He smiled when you let out a little moan. "Cute."

You pushed your fingers into his wet hair and massaged it. "Keep going. They're all yours to play with."

He pressed his face between them before pressing both against his face. He wiggled his face in them and hummed in happiness. He pulled back a little and gazed at them being pressed together. He felt himself drooling at the view before him.

Levi pressed his lips against yours and sighed happily. "So beautiful."

"Thank you."

He dragged his tongue over your right nipple as he moaned. He took your nipple into his mouth and sucked happily on it. He moved his tongue against your soft and sensitive skin as he felt his erection press against his jogging bottoms. You were such a wonderful and divine goddess that he loved with every fibre of his being.

He turned his head and covered your left breast in kisses. He nipped and sucked the skin causing lovebites to decorate your skin. He leaned up and massaged them. He watched his actions and adored how your boobs moved in his hands and jiggled a little. He smiled at the lovebites starting to form.

He wrapped his arms behind your back and lifted your body up. He pressed his face into your breasts and growled. "I love you and your body so much. You're incredible."

You hummed a laugh. "Want your next gift?"

"You spoil me."

You sat up and sat Levi back in his spot. You reached over and grabbed the lube and put some on your chest. "Figured it out?"

Levi gulped hard. "I know just what you have in mind." He pulled his hard cock out of his jogging bottoms and moved his hand up and down slowly. He parted his legs. "I can't wait."

You leaned over and pressed your breasts around his cock. You leaned your head down and opened your mouth a little and sucked on his tip. You moaned against him as you rolled your breasts around him. You smiled as Levi moaned and shivered in delight. You adored how hot his dick was and how much he was in heaven.

Levi leaned his head back and moaned out to the room. He pushed his hands through his wet hair as he enjoyed your hot mouth on his tip, your soft breasts on his cock and your gentle moans. He looked down as he panted and purred at your affection. He reached down and brushed back your hair.

You popped your mouth from him and smiled. "That feel good? Are you relaxed?"

Levi nodded. "Ngh, ah, ha, mm you're perfection. You make me feel so good."

You licked his tip before you began sucking again. Levi started panting as his pleasure increased. He loved how you doted on him. He never thought he deserved this kind of adoration and love, but you always spoiled him and showered him in so much love that it took his breath away.

He mumbled your name. "P-Please."

You gazed up at Levi. "What do you need?"

He yanked you against him and kissed you passionately. He lifted you and lay you against the sofa again. He crawled up your body and straddled your chest. "I hope you don't mind it this way."

You blushed as you gazed up at him. "Oh, handsome, you know very well I love you on top." You pushed your breasts together. "I'm all yours."

Levi pushed his cock between your pressed breasts and moaned as he watched it slide between them. He gripped the sofa and began bucking hard and fast against you. He gasped in delight as you stuck your tongue out for his tip. He gazed at you with such deep love and affection. You were perfection to him.

Levi moaned your name. He leaned over you more as he lost his composure a little and began bucking against you. He reached down and cupped the side of your face and he admired you. You were so beautiful to him. You were divine to him. He shivered as you licked his sensitive tip and smiled at him.

He whimpered a little as he felt the urge to cum. "Love, I can't hold on much longer."

You smiled at him. "Cum for me, my love."

He pulled back and moved his hand on his cock. He moaned your name. "I love you."

You pulled his hands from his cock and wrapped your hands around him. "I love you too."

Levi reached down and massaged your breasts. "My love. Darling." He moaned as you touched him. "So good."

You pushed a hand into his underwear and massaged his balls. "Let go."

He moaned your name and heavily panted as his cum covered your breasts. He shivered and whimpered your name as ribbons of his seed coated your plump soft breasts. "I love you." He mewled. "I love you."

You slowed your hand down before releasing him. You reached up and cupped the side of his face when you saw how sleepy he looked. You reached up and cupped the back of his neck and helped him lay back. You tucked him into his jogging bottoms and kissed him.

Levi hummed sleepily and softly said your name. "Thank you."

"I'll be right back."

Levi whined as you walked off. "Sweetness?" He slipped off the sofa and sleepily stumbled behind you. "Come back."

You gasped when he hugged you from behind. "Careful Levi, you'll get your clothes messy."

He nuzzled your neck. "I want to be with you."

"Okay, you can stay with me." You tried to pull his arms from you, but he held you tightly. You grabbed a cloth and cleaned up your chest. "I need to change."

He picked you up and carried you. "I'll dress you."

You hummed a laugh. "Perfect."

He sat you on the bed and pulled your sexy underwear off and swapped it for comfy things. He dragged on a top of his. "Cute."

You giggled. "Thank you."

Levi picked you up again and moved you up the bed. He wrapped himself around you and held you tightly. "Mm."

"Do you want to be cuddled or do you want me to cuddle you?"

He squeezed you. "I cuddle you." He snuggled close. "Mine."

You closed your eyes and melted into Levi's touch. You held him back and began peppering his face with kisses. "Mine." You lightly touched under his eyes. "Get some rest now, okay?"

He nodded. "I will. Just stay with me, always."

"I promise."

229 notes · View notes

rubyreduji · 2 years

Text

what you don't know — ljh

summary: what jihoon doesn’t know, won’t kill him

tags: established relationship, light angst w/ happy ending, idol!jihoon, graphic designer!reader, gn!reader wc: 4.3k an: something inspired this fic i just don't remember what ajfksl all i remember is being in the bathroom. i just wanted to do a “jihoon being a busy producer” trope w/o making jihoon a giant asshole so here we are :) slay healthy relationships and open conversations

You wake up to an empty bed. It’s nothing that’s new, you’re honestly used to it at this point. You just wish you weren’t. Instead of letting it get to you though, you just get up and stretch before heading to the kitchen to make your morning coffee.

There’s a dirty coffee cup in the sink already along with a bowl. Good, he actually ate breakfast today.

As you go through your morning routine you make a mental list of everything you need to get done today. You need to do laundry and clean the kitchen before starting dinner. You have to finish up some commissions from your art site and you have a phone call meeting at 2pm to go over a design with one of your clients.

Your life as a stay at home graphic designer is a lot different than your fiance’s job as an idol and producer. He wakes up early and comes home late and even when he’s resting he’s still thinking of song lyrics and choreography moves.

You’ve found it’s something you’ve gotten used to over time. You can admit to yourself that it’s not your most favorite thing in the world, but it’s not something you would say outloud to Jihoon. You are aware of how much hard work he’s put into getting where he is and you don’t want to deter that. You just sit back and play the role of the supportive house spouse while he goes out and plays the role of Woozi.

Sure it sucks when he has to cancel date night, or is too tired to watch that movie you guys were wanting to see, and you always miss him a little too much when he’s on tour, but in the end there’s not much you can do about it. It’s his job, and most importantly, it makes him happy. You understand it’s not a life for everyone, but you do your best to accommodate him. You tell yourself he’s living out his dreams, so of course you’re going to stand by his side and cheer him on.

The only people who know you even feel like this are Joshua and Jeonghan, and you still don’t tell them to the full extent of your feelings. You actually met the band through those two, initially being friends with them first. It just so happened that you and Jihoon hit it off. You still frequently talk to the two ‘95 liners though. They get texts from you asking how Jihoon is doing as you express your worries about the man overworking himself and hinting that you want them to suggest to Jihoon he goes home. You think the songs Jihoon produces are amazing, but you also think the most amazing thing is having Jihoon at home in your arms.

You know Jihoon loves you, sometimes it’s just hard to see it. It’s a bit hard to receive any kind of love, no matter the form, when he’s hidden himself away in his studio. The worst days are when you go all day without seeing the man. The only indication he was even home at all being the dirty dishes he left in the sink after eating his dinner and the new set of clothes inside the laundry hamper.

Yesterday was one of those days, meaning you haven’t seen him in over twenty-fours hours. Your fingers are itching to text him but you don’t want to bother him while he’s at work so you instead boot up your computer so you can get to work on your next design.

The only thing that soothes your running mind is the knowledge that Jihoon is sitting in his studio, working on a song that was written for you. And it’s the most you can do for now.

“Woozi!” Jihoon picks up his head from his desk to see Jeonghan and Joshua walking to the studio. Joshua drops a bag on his desk before sitting down on the couch.

“What’s this?” Jihoon nudges the bag, a bit afraid it’s another one of their stupid pranks.

“Lunch,” Jeonghan answers simply.

“I didn’t ask for this.” Jihoon frowns as he pulls out the cartoon of extra rice. This makes him frown even more. Jeonghan is too cheap to pay for extra rice, so either something is wrong or he wants something.

“Maybe you didn’t ask for it, but someone else did.”

“What?”

“Y//N,” Joshua sighs and finally explains to Jihoon. “They asked us to make sure you ate today and then they sent me some money.” That makes more sense. You’re always doing things like that; taking care of him even when you’re not physically around. “I didn’t take their money obviously, but I assured them you would be fed.”

Jihoon reaches for his wallet. “How much did it cost? At least let me pay you back.”

“Don’t worry about it, really Jihoon,” Joshua says. “Just make sure to take care of that fiance of yours as well.”

Jihoon scoffs. “I do, not that it’s much of your business.” Jihoon doesn’t mean to come off so rudely, but he’s always been a bit sensitive of his relationship with you. He doesn’t like when the members try to get into your guys’ personal business.

“It may not be my business, but that doesn’t mean I can’t look out for my close friend,” Joshua says offhandedly.

That’s another reason why Jihoon doesn’t like his members talking about you. You’re best friends with Jeonghan and Joshua and they like to hold that over his head. Even as his fiance, you sometimes come off as closer to those two than Jihoon.

“Looking out for them?”

“Listen Jihoon, we love you of course, but Y/N means a lot to us as well,” Jeonghan pipes up. “We don’t want them getting hurt.”

“Why the hell would I hurt them? They’re my fiance, if you haven’t remembered.” Jihoon is progressively getting more annoyed now, impatient with the way the older two are talking.

“Just because you don’t mean to, doesn’t mean you aren’t,” Jeonghan answers. “Y/N is really good to you, you know.”

“Yes I know. Is there a point to this? I appreciate the food but I do have work to do.”

“Of course you have work to do,” Jeonghan mutters.

“Excuse me?”

“What he means,” Joshua cuts in, “is that maybe you should be giving more attention to your fiance, and less on your work. We just had a comeback, Jihoon. This is our down time. Yet, you’re still here, cooped up in your studio working as diligently as ever. It’s an admirable trait, don’t get me wrong, but you have a fiance waiting back at home. When was the last time you even saw Y/N?”

“I saw them last night,” Jihoon says.

“Seeing them for five seconds before going to bed doesn’t count,” Jeonghan adds. “Especially if you didn’t even exchange words. Y/N does everything for you. They’ve been nothing but supportive of our career, and what have you done back for them?”

“You two aren’t making any sense, and honestly I don’t have time for this. My relationship is perfectly healthy, especially with people butting in. I would know if something was wrong with Y/N,” Jihoon snaps.

“Suurreee,” Jeonghan not-so-discreetly rolls his eyes.”Since you know so much about them.”

“What are you talking about?” Jihoon’s brow furrows as he looks over at Jeonghan and Joshua.

“Hmm,” the evil twins hum, implying that Jihoon should know what they’re talking about.

“I don’t have time for the two of you today. Either get on with it or get out of my studio. Your non-committal grunts aren’t going to do any of us any good.”

“Snappy today,” Jeonghan mutters under his breath.

“We’re just saying that maybe Y/N isn’t as content as you think,” Joshua answers with a shrug. He’s attempting to come off as indifferent, like he can either be right or wrong, but Jihoon knows better. He knows that the two know more than they are letting on.

“What has Y/N told you?” Jihoon demands.

“Maybe you should be asking them that yourself,” Jeonghan responds, leaving Jihoon with a sour taste in his mouth.

“Y/N? I’m home!” Jihoon calls as he walks into your apartment.

“Jihoon? Honey?” You appear from the bedroom. You have a look of concern plastered on your features and one of his t-shirts in your hands. “Why are you home so early? Is everything alright at the studio?”

“Everything’s okay,” he assures you, “I just wanted to come home at a decent time today.”

“Oh, well, I wasn’t expecting you home so soon or I would have made dinner already. Let me finish folding the laundry and I’ll get right on it,” you tell your fiance.

“Hey wait, I can make us dinner,” Jihoon protests. “You make dinner every night, it’s not fair of me not to pull my weight.”

“I don’t mind. You’re just so busy all the time, it’s the least I can do,” you say. “You should go get changed and relax.” You disappear back into the bathroom.

“Baby, wait,” Jihoon quickly follows after you. You’re placing his clothes inside the dresser. You hum in Jihoon’s direction but don’t stop your actions. Jihoon huffs. Why is this so difficult? “Baby stop for a sec.” Jihoon grabs your arms and holds you still.

“What’s wrong? Are you sure you’re okay?” You frown and reach up to cup Jihoon’s face. “Are you getting sick? Should I get you anything?”

“Y/N,” Jihoon says pointedly and you stop. “Let’s just sit down for a moment okay?” You nod, a bit concerned and confused, and sit down onto the bed. “You know I love you a lot right?”

You pull away from Jihoon a bit. “What’s this all about? Are you…are you breaking up with me? Oh no, don’t tell me there’s someone else.” Your hand flies to your engagement ring as you fiddle with the band. It’s a habit Jihoon has noticed you picked up after you two got engaged. At first he thought it was just normal boredom fidgeting but now he’s starting to wonder if it’s a nervous habit.

“No, no! Of course not.” Jihoon reaches for you again. He envelopes your hands with his warm ones. His thumb brushes over the top of your knuckles as he tries to soothe you. “I promise, there is nobody else but you. I wouldn’t want anyone else. I just wanted to talk to you about something.”

You stare down at your hands with a small frown. “Is this because I asked Han and Shua to get you lunch? I know you don’t like to be bothered while you’re working but I wanted to make sure you were eating properly. I won’t do it again if you don’t me to.”

Jihoon’s chest tightens. Before you came into his life, Jihoon always saw himself as someone who wasn’t made for a relationship. He can write lyrics about love and heartbreak and romance but it wasn’t something he could truly relate to. He’s never known how to be a good boyfriend who is loving and doting on his partner. He doesn’t know how to work someone into his life and be able to take care of them and be able to give and receive love in the way romantic partners do.

Then he met you and you were perfect. You’ve always been so independent and supportive and Jihoon doesn’t have to worry about any of those things because being with you was easy. You never asked for much and you were always there for Jihoon when he needed but still gave him the space he liked so much. You two didn’t work as two halves of a whole, you two were your own people who lived your own lives. There were no expectations, no pressure, you were understanding and attentive and you were the best person Jihoon has ever met. You still are. That’s why he asked you to marry him.

Looking at you now though, Jihoon wonders if he made a mistake along the way. If he can still fix it. When did it get to the point where you think he doesn’t appreciate your gestures anymore? Where you’re afraid to bother him during work so you apologize for just trying to look out for him. When did it get to the point where Jihoon barely exchanges three words with you throughout the day? Where you do all the chores and errands on top of your own job and looking out for Jihoon as well. Where Jihoon comes home late and eats the dinner that you made and he can’t even thank you for it because it’s so late that you’re already asleep.

Maybe Jeonghan and Joshua were right. Are you as content as Jihoon was led to believe? Does Jihoon still make you feel loved and cherished?

“I really appreciated it baby, you even remembered the rice, thank you.” Jihoon leans over to press a gentle kiss to your cheek. “It’s just that uh, the hyungs were talking about something weird.”

“Jeonghan and Joshua?”

“Yeah…” Jihoon pauses, trying to figure out how to bring up the topic. “We’re…okay? Right?”

You tilt your head to the side in confusion. “Yeah? Of course we are. Do you think that we’re not?”

It’s not the answer Jihoon wants, but he’s not sure how to go about bringing it up without scaring you off. “I just…had some concerns I guess.”

“About…us?” You frown again. “Jihoon please what is this about? I’d like to go make dinner, so if you’re breaking up with me can we hurry this up? I don’t want to cry today so can you be nice about it?”

“Baby no! I’m not, I’m not breaking up with you,” Jihoon rushes to tell you.

“Then what’s wrong? I think we’re fine and I’d like to have dinner and spend the night with my fiance who is finally home for once.” You pull out of Jihoon’s embrace to stand up. “Does chicken sound good?” You don’t wait for him to respond though, heading out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.

Jihoon sighs. Maybe it really isn’t that big of a deal. Jeonghan and Joshua were just being annoying as usual. Jihoon doesn’t want to dwell on it though and he rushes after you so you at least don’t have to make dinner alone.

“Y/N!” You turn to see Soonyoung approaching you. “It’s been a while, how are you?” He pulls you into a quick hug. You’re at an event for Seventeen to celebrate their newest album hitting the number one spot on Billboard’s Top Albums.

“I’m doing good, keeping busy. Congratulations on the album by the way.”

“Thanks! A lot of the credit goes to that fiance of yours though.” Soonyoung nudges your arm with a wink.

You chuckle a bit. “He is pretty amazing, isn’t he? I’m just glad all of the hard work pays off. It helps me know the long days alone are worth something.” It’s supposed to come off as a joke but you can’t help the way sadness creeps into your tone.

“Where is Jihoon anyways?”

“He said he has to finish something up in his studio and that he’ll be here soon. You know the work never stops with him,” you say.

“He didn’t accompany you?” Soonyoung frowns.

“Ah, no. It’s okay Young-ah, I don’t mind. He’s very busy, I understand that. You guys wouldn’t be able to do things like hit number one album if it wasn’t for all that time put in. From all thirteen of you. I’m not going to hold back his work process, I get this life is very important to him.”

“Not to pry or anything, but does that not bother you?”

“I wouldn’t say…bother? I’m glad my Jihoonie is happy, I’m glad he loves what he does. I just guess sometimes I wish it was different. Not that I want Jihoon to change anything, it’s just a bit lonely at home. I wake up and Jihoon is long gone, I go to bed and he comes home when I’m already dreaming. I don’t want him to sacrifice his work, I would just like more time in a day, you know? Be able to have him to myself once in a while. His work is very important though, to all of you. I wouldn’t want him to change the importance of it just for me. It’s silly anyways. Ah, I’m sorry for rambling Soonyoung-ah. Forgive me.” You bow slightly to Soonyoung. “Excuse me, I think I’m going to go find Jeonghan and Joshua.”

Pain claws at your heart, but you ignore it. You don’t like thinking about Jihoon’s time balance, let alone talk about it outloud. You came to terms with a long time ago and it’s a decision you made, so now you have to live with it. You know the day will come when Seventeen doesn’t renew their contract and Jihoon will settle down and be able to give you more of his time, but right now is not that time, and you just have to accept that. It’s the price to pay to be able to have him later.

You could have it much worse anyways. Jihoon doesn’t yell at you or ever get aggressive. He always makes sure you have what you need and you know that he loves you. You don’t want to be selfish and ask for more when he’s already giving you so much. You think back to a week ago when Jihoon tried to ask you if you think there’s anything wrong in your relationship. You told him no, because you didn’t want to worry him. You can be patient and wait for him to give you his time. You’ll survive.

“Y/N-ah.” You stop in your tracks to see your fiance standing in front of you. His hair is a bit of a mess and his suit is crumpled and you don’t know whether to chuckle or sigh. You walk up to the man and start to fix his hair and outfit right away.

“You’re a mess Hoon,” you say to him softly. “Did you get everything settled at the studio?”

Jihoon reaches up and takes your hands off his tie to hold them in his own. He leans down and presses a kiss to your knuckles. “Yeah, everything’s all good. But I should have been here with you the whole time, I’m sorry that I wasn’t.”

“Don’t worry about,” you brush him off, “Soonyoung kept me company.”

“Oh boy,” Jihoon mutters. “I really should have been here then.” You chuckle at the fake disdain your fiance has for his best friend. “Hey, let’s go home yeah? I don’t think I want to be here much longer.��

“You just got here honey, are you sure?”

“I think I’d rather just spend time with you, alone.” Jihoon grips your hands tighter. “If you’d like.”

“I always want to spend time with you, my love.” You answer. Jihoon flashes that sweet adorable grin of his and you two leave the venue.

When you get back to your apartment you both change into comfier clothes before Jihoon wraps you both up in a blanket and holds you close to him.

“Y/N?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for honey? You haven’t done anything wrong.” You shuffle around so you can look at Jihoon in the face.

“Ah, but I have. I…haven’t been a very good fiance to you. Or boyfriend for that matter.” Jihoon ruffles his hair, a habit he has when he’s stressed about something. “You are…perfect. You always have been. You are the most understanding, supportive, selfless person I know, and I am so lucky to call you mine. You do so much for me even when I don’t ask you to, even when you could easily not.

“Recently it’s come to my attention that I’ve uh, not been doing the same for you. Relationships should be 50/50 you know, but this one has been more 99/1. I haven’t been giving you what you need. I’ve been so focused on everything for Seventeen, that I forgot the most important thing to me: you. I love music, it’s my life, but I love you too, and you’re my future. I should be splitting my time more evenly. I should be doing better at being an actual romantic partner.

“And don’t tell me that it isn’t an issue, because I know it is. You’re so strong and caring and you’d do anything for me, even sacrifice your own feelings. I want you to stop doing that, because you matter too. I want to be better as well. You deserve better.”

“Jihoon…” you start when he finished his whole speech, “what brought this on?”

“I heard you talking to Soonyoung earlier, about always being alone and how I’m always working. Why did you tell me? If I knew it bothered you so much I would have done something about it.”

“That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you. Seventeen and being an idol means so much to you, I don’t want you to stop expressing that passion just because of me. As you said, I’m your future. We have the rest of our lives to be together, but right now, this is the time for you and your career. I can wait.”

“That’s not fair to you though!”

“Jihoon,” you scold him lightly. “I didn’t want you to know because I don’t want to worry you. You’re doing exactly that right now and I didn’t want to bother you with it because it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Baby…it’s a big deal to me, okay? Even if it’s not to you. I want you to know that I love you and that you are being taken care of just as much as you take care of me. So be selfish for a moment, please. I want to talk about it.” Jihoon’s eyes read nothing but sincerity and you take a deep breath. You love Jihoon and know that he loves you back. You trust him and finally you let yourself open, knowing nothing bad will happen.

“Most days it really doesn’t bother me, you know? It’s something I knew would happen when we started dating and I knew that if this relationship was going to get anymore serious I would have to accept the fact that your time is mainly spent on your music. I do miss how we were in the beginning. The spontaneous dates and sweet gifts and spending time together as much as we could. I don’t mind where we are now though. We’re more secure this way. It feels right, more real, you know? Maybe the right word is domestic.

Like I said, most days I’m okay, but every once in a while I become hyper aware of it. I just miss you. I’m well taken care of and I don’t mind looking after you either, I guess I just like seeing your face. I want you to tell me about your day as we eat dinner together. Those kinds of things. Maybe wake up beside you a few days a week. I know that it’s not going to happen everyday but every once in a while would be nice. I know that you love me so recently it’s just been a waiting game for me. I know there will be a day when you have as much free time in the world to spend with me, but right now is not that time. I’ll be okay, no matter what happens, but if you would like to find a few hours every once in a while to spend time with me, I think I’d cherish those moments more than anything.”

When you finish telling Jihoon about your thoughts you finally focus back on your fiance to see his eyes starting to collect tears. Jihoon quickly wipes them away but you’ve already seen them.

“I…love you so much,” Jihoon starts off. “I am so lucky to have someone like you by my side. I miss you too. I know that I can’t promise things are going to get better right away, but I’m going to try, okay? For you, because you deserve nothing but the best.” Jihoon pulls you in closer and you nuzzle your face into his neck.

“I’ll be happy no matter what, as long as I have you.”

“I just don’t want you thinking you’re not the most important thing in my life, because you are. I promise to you I’ll be home more often, and if I’m not, come knock some sense into me, okay?”

You giggle. “Okay. I’ll accept your promise, but I still want you to do your work, I know that it means the world to you. Just…balance your time better, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Jihoon agrees. “And I promise I’m going to make it all up to you, everything. I’ll be here when you wake up and I’ll help you do the chores and I’ll even rub your back when you’ve been at your desk for too long.”

You laugh at your fiance’s proposal. “Well aren’t you a charmer? Mm, as nice as all of that sounds, I think for right now I’m content just being here in your arms. Let’s stay like this for a little while longer.”

“Sounds perfect to me,” Jihoon says and he presses a kiss to your temple before securing his arms tighter around you, exactly where you should be. You know that things still aren’t going to be perfect, Rome wasn’t built in a day, but for now, you’re going to relish being held by your fiance, your heart full knowing he’s going to put effort into fulfilling the promises he made to you.

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