#I don’t think they have chickens so I’ll bring eggs next time

[seabeck]

So a while back someone gave me a cow head because they butchered a cow. Today they gave me a pig skull and the man’s wife insisted I come see their baby sheep and they’re Jacob’s sheep!! They will be eating them eventually and it sounds like they’ll give me the skull too but for now they’re growing up and the male (what is a male sheep called? A buck? It’s a ram lmfao) is still doing his job as a stud. The babies were sooooo cute though!!

#vulture culture #I got to see a pig fight too #I don’t think they have chickens so I’ll bring eggs next time

[mrwavellswaps]

Anxious for Change

Mike had been living his best life. He was in great shape, had been apart of the police force for two years, had a ton of great friends and coworkers. It all seemed great. Well except for one thing. Sure Mike had an incredible body but he’d always dreamed of what it’d be like to become more of a chubby bear. There were many times where he’d considered changing up his lifestyle and packing on some extra weight to get the body he dreamt of having… but his insecurities always stopped him. He believed that if he lost his fit, athletic body that he’d be judged for it. Especially since the majority of his friends were all fitness freaks like he seemed to be. He worried they’d just start to view him as lazy and maybe even see him as being less then they are. Of course a lot of this might’ve just been in Mikes head. Perhaps his friends wouldn’t care one bit about what he did to his body and would support him anyway… but the insecure thoughts still lingered regardless.

Because of this Mike projected his desire onto his new boyfriend Jim in a way. Jim was chubby bear/cub type and whenever Mike would look at him, he’d imagine what it’d be like to be that same size.

While Mike retained a healthy diet to keep his lean, muscular frame, Jim would eat pretty much whatever he wanted. Of course Mike saw how easy it’d be to join in and eat the same takeouts and fast food that Jim loved until he too started to become a bear. But again, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He was a prisoner to his own insecurities.

One evening the pair were sat at the table eating dinner as usual by now. Jim had ordered himself some fast food like usual while Mike had cooked himself some chicken and rice with eggs on the side and a glass of orange juice to wash it down.

“Hey babe. Do you *chew* ever wonder what it’d be like *gulp* if we had each overs bodies?” Jim asked as he wolfed down a burger. Of course Mike was take off guard by the question. Did Jim know about his desire? No surely not right? It was just a dumb question for fun.

“Oh… uhh yeah I guess so. I think that’d be pretty… wild I suppose.” Mike replied, trying to stay casual as he scooped up the rest of his rice.

“Same here. It’d be so weird having to wear each over clothes and shit.” Jim laughed. “Since I know for a fact you’d be swamped in most of mine and I’d rip most of yours normally.” He patted his belly before taking a swig of his drink. “You know what we should try that.”

“Try what?”

“Wear each overs clothes. Could be fun! Don’t worry, I’ll be extra careful with yours.” Jim winked

Mike hesitated for a second. It felt like this all came out of nowhere. Yet at the same time the idea of wearing those huge clothes and imagining he could fill them out was such a hot vision. “You know what sure. How’s about we finish dinner then head up stairs. We can wear each-overs work clothes… why not” Mike smirked.

As one could imagine the pair finished up their food pretty fast. They gave it a bit of time to settle before venturing upstairs into the bedroom. Excitedly they both began stripping off piece by piece, checking each over out in the process. Once they were both nude at last, they exchanged clothes. Mike handing over his black police gear while Jim tossed over the surprisingly clean clothes he’d worn on the construction site that day.

Mike pulled on Jim’s underwear and jeans first. They’d fit Jim snuggly but on Mike’s frame they barely held up even after Mike put the belt on nice and tight. Though looking over he saw Jim wasn’t doing much better as he was struggling to pull those police pants over his thick ass. Despite that he was trying surprisingly hard to do so until they finally slipped over. Next Mike plunged himself into the tee which was still damp with Jim’s sweat which, just as he expected, swamped him. Looking over he noticed Jim had somehow managed to pull on the police shirt though it was skin tight and his belly was protruding out the bottom. After that Mike even went as far as to slip on Jim’s fluorescent jacket while laughing at how even that was massively oversized. Lastly they started to pull on each overs socks. One thing Mike had first noticed when he first met Jim aside from his bearish body was how huge his feet were and that was even more apparent now seeing how baggy Jim’s socks felt on his feet whereas Mikes socks looked closer to ankle socks on Jim’s feet.

In all honesty, they both looked silly. Mike was barely able to keep Jim’s clothes on while it was miracle Jim hadn’t tore any of Mike’s clothes in that whole process. But despite that Mike couldn’t deny how hot this was. Wearing his boyfriends huge clothes. Watching his boyfriends huge stomach and ass press tightly against his clothes. Maybe he could convince Jim to do some kind of kinky role play where they pretend they’re in each overs bodies to spice things up.

“Fuck yessss I can’t wait…” Jim muttered to himself.

“Huh? Can’t wait for wh-aaaoooohhhh” Mike began to groan as a hot sensation swiftly began building in his stomach before spreading out across his body. “Oooooahhh-whats-Ahhoooooahh-happening?!-Ooooooohh” He managed to say between moans. Jim didn’t reply. Instead he too started to moan. It seemed like he was experiencing the same as whatever Mike was currently going through. Except… he was grinning?

Mike’s attention soon returned to his own body as all of sudden he felt bloated beyond belief. It was as if he’d just scarfed down an entire buffet at once. Then as if on cue his stomach practically exploded outwards in an almost cartoonish fashion. Long gone we’re the abs he’d worked to maintain as a large soft belly now rested in their place, filling out Jim’s shirt nicely. Before he even had time to process, the same bloating sensation filled his arms, legs, ass and pretty much every part of his body. But it was all too much. Mike’s eyes started to flutter, losing consciousness but before he blacked out he glanced back at Jim stood across the room, still smiling away as his body got leaner and leaner, the clothes Mike had given not looking so tight anymore. The last thing he saw was the way Jim’s facial features started to twist and alter but he couldn’t make out the result before everything faded to black.

Only about 20 minutes or so had passed by the time Mike awoke. Immediately he noticed that not only was he alone in the bedroom but the body he adorned was most certainly not his own. Slowly he sat up, with a bit of effort, and was bewildered to feel a huge gut rolling as he did. It was bizarre but somehow he now filled out all of Jim’s clothes perfectly. The jeans, the socks, the tee. All of it hugged his body just right. The belt buckle even burst due to what must’ve been pressure after how tight Mike had done it up before. What the fuck was going on?!

The perplexed man pulled himself up off the floor to inspect himself properly. His arms looked much bigger beefier than before with a mix of fat and muscle while his legs were now gigantic monsters with thighs that permanently stuck together due to the sheer mass. Naturally the very first thing he did was pull up Jim’s shirt and of course he saw none other than a big hairy belly. But not just any hairy belly. Sure it looked different from this angle but it he was certain it was Jim’s belly! But how?!

Mike couldn’t help but rub and even pat it a little in wonder, feeling himself get a bit of a hard on in the process. But even that felt different. Just then, using his bigger meatier hands, Mike undid the zipper on Jim’s jeans before whipping out his cock. Only it wasn’t his cock. It was a lot thicker than his but a fair bit shorter as well. Just. Like. Jim’s… It even had the exact curvature that Jim’s cock had!

By now Mike had started to connect the dots but at the same time he just couldn’t believe it. After all it was an insane thought but everything was pointing to him somehow… becoming Jim!? His hands darted up towards his face. He still had a beard but it felt different from before yet also familiar at the same time. What caught his attention more though was how pudgy his face felt. All his features just felt wrong like they weren’t in the right places anymore. He needed a mirror!

Dashing into the bathroom, while almost stumbling a few times due to his new weight, Mike couldn’t help but let out a gasp as he saw the face staring back at him. Jim. It was Jim’s face. But not just his face, it was Jim’s entire body mimicking his every move! Shell shocked would be an understatement right now. Mike physically couldn’t speak out of pure disbelief but if he could he was sure the voice he would hear would be that of his boyfriend.

After the initial shock had worn off, Mike couldn’t help but inspect himself further. Poking at his face, pinching his arms, probing his stomach. On one hand he should be freaking out but on the other he couldn’t help but start to feel horny. He loved his boyfriends body so much because he’d always wished he had the courage to give in a have a body like that for himself… and now he did. He flexed his beefy arms a little before turning around to see the thick ass he’d ogled so many times pressed against Jim’s jeans. Almost every part of his mind was telling him to rip off those jeans and start exploring but he was hit with a sudden realisation. If he now looked like Jim then what about the real Jim? Infact where was Jim!?

Mike burst out of the bathroom and stomped down the stairs fully expecting to have to hunt Jim down but it seems he didn’t have to. Sat on the living room couch was a man that looked identical to Mike’s real body… with his cock out. His doppelgänger looked up with a dumb grin as he continued stroking his shaft.

“J…Jim? Is that you?”

“Of course babe! Though I guess you could start calling me Mike now heheh” Jim joked

“W-what the fuck happened? Why am I you? Why are you me? A-a-and why are you so damn calm about this?!?!” Mike spiralled in a panic. Seeing this Jim hopped up from the couch, still amused at how light he felt, before placing a hand on Mike’s shoulder.

“Because I did this.” Jim admitted with a calming smile. Mike’s face contorted with confusion, not being able to speak as he waited for an explanation. “I went into this magic shop where the clerk sold me a special little potion. All we had to do was consume it, wear each overs clothes and bam, total switcheroo!”

“B-but when did-“

“I slipped some into your orange juice earlier when you weren’t looking.”

Mike didn’t know what to say. Why? Why would Jim do this? Why would he steal his body? Part of him wanted to sucker punch the other man but he just couldn’t. The idea of hitting his own face was just… off putting.

“You’ve gotta go back and get more! We can’t just become each over Jim!”

“Why not? We’ve been dating almost a year now. We know enough about each over. Plus the shop clerk also said we’d gradually gain some of the memories of our new forms. Besides, I see the way you look at me sometimes. Especially when we eat together, the way you always look at the food I eat. And the way you always grab and worship my stomach during sex. You wanted to have a body like mine right?” Jim deduced before grabbing hold of Mike’s gut and shaking it a little. Once again Mike was lost for words but the twitching bulge in his jeans was all the answer Jim needed. “Look, I got a second vial of the potion as well so if you don’t like this we can always swap back later. Just try it for a day or two and see how you feel babe.”

Mike wasn’t sure how he felt about all this. He was horny sure but the idea of him not only having to live Jim’s life but Jim living his as well just seemed weird… but maybe not in a bad way. He’d always said how he’d liked to have worked construction had his police job not worked out since building was always something he’d found oddly interesting. Jim on the other hand had frequently mentioned how he’d have loved to know what being an officer was like. Before his train of thought could travel any further though, Mike felt one of his former hands slide down the back of his jeans before squeezing his bigger, furry ass cheeks.

“And you can’t tell me you’ve never wondered what it’d be like to fuck yourself. I know I have.” Jim murmured though he barely had time to finish the sentence before Mike pressed his pudgy face against Jim’s.

The couple made out for a few hot minutes, groping at the bodies they used to own before Mike broke them apart. “Fine, we can do a trial run, but you should’ve told me about this first…”

“I know I’m sorry babe… I was just so excited and acted a little irrationally.” Jim slowly began to pull Mike’s jeans down until his ass and very excited cock were exposed. “But hey I’m certain we’re going to have lots of fun” He stated with a grin before turning his old body around and pushing him down against the couch, getting a good view of his thick former ass.

Mike grunted in pleasure as Jim shoved his face between the colossal cheeks. No wonder Mike always loved eating his ass out before sex, it tasted so fucking great and the feeling of having his face smushed between those giant cheeks was nothing short of euphoric. Fuck he was so glad Mike was kinda on board with this. In all honesty, what Jim did wasn’t a lapse in judgment at all. He wanted Mike’s body. Sure Mike was his boyfriend and he loved him but Jim had always felt such a deep, jealous desire towards Mike’s fit, lean body. The fact of the matter was Jim never intended to swap back. Ever. You see Jim had lied about having a potion to switch back. In fact the one they’d taken was a temporary switch that would undo itself after 48 hours… unless of course they fulfilled a certain condition. To fill each over with their seed. Once that was done, it was completely permanent with no way of undoing it.

“Fuuuuuuuuck my ass feels incredible!” Jim stated as he gradually pressed his new cock between those furry cheeks and into the hole. “Or should I say your ass now hahah!”

Mike couldn’t deny how amazing it felt on his end. Having the cock he used to own shoved up inside his new hole was a feeling like no other. Part of him was starting to think that maybe this was a good idea after all. He’d always envied Jim’s pudgy body and now he had it all for himself. Just feeling all the pudge jiggle as he was rammed into felt amazing, especially the way his belly wobbled. This was what he’d always wanted but was too afraid to have. During this Mike was surprised just how into this Jim was getting. He was really giving his ass a pounding, not that Mike was complaining at this point. The real icing on the cake however was when they flipped over so Mike was on his back. With a smirk Jim began caressing Mike’s thick hairy tits before pinching at his nipples. The feeling was electric! Mike’s old nipples never felt like that. Sensitive beyond belief. Now he understood why Jim had always told him to play with his nipples during foreplay.

“Yeeaaahh I knew you’d like that.” Jim guffawed upon seeing Mike’s face contort in pleasure. “I only realised just how sensitive my old nipples were when I got this body and started to touch yours and realised they didn’t feel nearly as euphoric. Thankfully the rest of your sexy body more than makes up for that though.”

Jim continues to pound into Mike with a certain eagerness that Mike had never really seen from his boyfriend before. He was certainly enjoying though. And even throughout getting his ass pounded by his own cock, Mike couldn’t help but still feel up his own body. Grabbing at his belly and arms, squeezing his chest and of course pinching at his nipples whenever Jim wasn’t already doing it. At one point Jim even stopped fucking just to bend down and suck on them. Mike found himself groaning out and holding his former face against his furry tits while his cock throbbed and leaked. It was official. This was some of the best sex he’d ever had!

The two fucked it so many different positions. Some where Mike was even pressed against the floor or the wall while getting drilled but they ended in the same position they started in. On the couch with Mike laid face down, ass up while Jim was getting ready to explode. He sped up in pace, now so eager to finish inside Mike. He began to shout and curse as his balls clenched before…

“OOOOH YEAH FUUUUUCK!” Jim bellowed, his cock unloading a huge nut and creaming his former ass. “Take it! Take it all!” Little did Mike know that Jim wasn’t just referring to the cum but for him to take Jim’s body as well.

Mike was pleasantly surprised afterwards however as almost immediately after pulling out, Jim was already putting his own ass on display for Mike while pretty much begging to fucked. Mike was more than willing to oblige, pumping his fatter dick and lubing it up with spit and precum. He shoved two of his thick sausage fingers inside the hole first, exploring it a little in bewilderment before pushing the fat tip of his member inside. It was a little tight but Mike had taken Jim’s cock enough times in the past to be able to slip right in.

Everything about this felt foreign to Mike. Using a new dick to fuck with felt so oddly different and feeling his new body weight shift and jiggle with each thrust was such a bizarre sensation but it was one he enjoyed throughly. Not to mention how much stronger he felt now. All this size came with enough strength to be able to pick up and move his former body into whatever position he liked. Before long Mike was stood up holding Jim in his arms of whom had his legs wrapped around Mike’s large waist as he bounced up and down on Mike’s member. It made him feel dominant in a whole new way he never could’ve experienced before.

However due to all the nipple and prostate stimulation from beforehand, Mike was swiftly getting ready to blow. They found themselves back on the sofa once again with Jim’s legs up in the air while Mike pumped at an ever increasing pace.

“Fuuuck… fuuckkk I’m… gonna cum…” Mike was just able to grunt out between thrusts.

Hearing those words was like magic to Jim’s ears. Immediately he wrapped his legs around Mike’s waist, pulling him in close. “Yess! Yess cum inside me! Fuck yeah give me your fuckin body!” Jim blurted out

“Fuu-…W-what? What do y-ooooooahhhh” Mike was stopped short as Jim lunged forwards and grabbed both of Mike’s nipples, squeezing and twisting them causing the other man to go into a frenzy.

“Just cum you giant bastard!”

On cue Mike’s jaw goes slack for a moment, letting out a deep satisfied groan as his new bear nut rose through his cock before erupting in a massive flow of thick cum that filled Jim’s hole to the brim. Both men had a look of blissful accomplishment plastered across their faces but for totally different reasons. With that however, Mike collapses on top of Jim after pulling out, totally exhausted and sweaty. Jim didn’t mind though. If anything he welcomed the feeling of being pinned under his old body while taking in his former sweaty scent. Fuck it smelt even better from the outside. But more importantly he was just happy that now, no matter what, he got to keep Mike’s lean athletic body.

- 1 week later -

Jim had just finished preparing his balanced dinner for the evening after recording all the calories. By the time he sat down at the table though, Mike was already digging into the takeout he’d ordered. Jim smiled seeing how happy and content Mike was. Just a week ago they’d been in the opposite positions but since they switched things couldn’t have been better for the couple.

The couple first days were a tad awkward. Since they hadn’t fully gained the necessary memories yet Mike was getting quite a few odd looks around the construction site. Jim on the other hand had not choice but to use up some of his sick days since he couldn’t risk doing police work without the proper knowledge. However by about day 3 the new memories had sunk in and the pair were able to perfectly slip into their new lives. Jim was quick to get along with his new partner on the job and it didn’t take long for Mike to get in on all the banter with his new tradie buddies. Soon enough nobody would ever be able to tell that they’d been living the opposite life up until a week ago.

Jim of course was more than happy with his new body. It was first time in his life he’d ever had abs, not to mention proper muscled pecs. Everything about him felt so lean and compact. He was faster, had way more stamina and was incredibly flexible. All of which was a dream come true. Before he’d have never have been able to get himself into this kind of shape but with Mike’s discipline instilled within, he was have no problem maintaining a healthy, balanced diet and keeping up with a consistent work out schedule. Now that he’d experienced what it was like to be as fit as this, there was no way he’d ever want to return to his old body.

Mike was having a similar experience but on the other end of the spectrum. For him it was the first time he’d had a gut that sometimes blocked his view as well as big squishy fur tits. Every inch of his body felt so hefty which in turn made him feel stronger. Stronger than he’d ever been before. And he loved it! Sure he might not even had the same stamina and flexibility but who needs any of that anyway when you’ve got such a hot pudgy body to enjoy 24/7! Plus eating was just so easy now because he could eat whatever the hell he wanted. Pizza, Burgers, Fries, Chips, Chocolate, Muffins. All of which he would’ve seen as taboo before unless he had a rare cheat day. Swiftly Mike was falling deeper and deeper in love with his new bearish body.

“Mmmhmm… this stuff is soooo good babe. I can’t believe how much I’ve been missing out on all these years.” Mike said between mouthfuls of Chinese food. He’d been ordering something different to try almost every night so far.

“Haha well don’t tempt me. Gotta keep in top shape for the job.”

Mike chuckled “Honestly I was a little annoyed when you first pulled this whole switching thing on me but this last week has been one of the happiest of my life.” he admitted. “You know I always envied your body. Huge and chubby to just the right degree. Fuck I wanted to have this so badly but I was too scared… but look at me now!” He pulled up his shirt, patting and rubbing his big furry gut with pride.

“What I’m trying to say is Thank you… and if you really want I wouldn’t mind staying this way. You know… for good.”

Jim had to do his best to keep a straight face as Mike still believed this was reservable. Instead he simply replied saying that he would love that and that he’d throughly enjoyed his time in Mike’s form as well. “Well then, if that’s the case, then should we start getting used to calling each over by our new names for real now Jim.”

Hearing his boyfriend call him by that name made the new Jim’s fat cock immediately spring up in his pants. “I think you’re right, Mike.”

With that the interesting couple finished their meals after fully embracing their new identities. The new Mike would sleep soundly knowing he tricked his boyfriend into thinking the permanent swap was his own idea and could continue to pound the new Jim’s ass almost every night. Besides this was the best ending for both of them. They both got the bodies they desired and were an even happier couple than before.

This story was actually meant to be up a couple days ago as it was only supposed to be a short 1K word story but I ended up getting quite carried away. Regardless I hope you all enjoy!

#magic #male body swap #male body theft #male transformation #permanent #weight gain #bear #hairy #identity theft #cop #tradie

[wilderflcwers]

had to clip this bit as it caused me to lose my life

(transcript:)

Murph: And you see, almost instantly, Ol’ Guppy bursts through the door.

Ol' Guppy: Oh, hey, ah, heard you’re on the market.

Calliope: Yeah, you want to buy the Grand Mariner?

Ol' Guppy: Yeah, we’re gonna buy the Grand Mariner.

Sol: Wow!

Ol' Guppy: Yeah, we’ve been trying to buy it for a bit, we’ve been trying to, you know, get a new business because the bar hasn’t been doing too well.

Calder: Wow, I can’t imagine why.

Sol: I think, you know, going from a small bar to a massive hotel is gonna be the perfect fit.

Ol' Guppy: Yeah.

Calliope: I think so.

Ol' Guppy: I got you guys a baby.

Sol: Huh?

Calliope & Calder: What?

Murph: You see Ol’ Guppy hands you guys a fishbowl with a fish in it.

Sol: Is this your…child?

Ol' Guppy: Yeah.

Sol: Congratulations!

Ol' Guppy: One—one of ‘em.

Calliope: Do you—do you want to raise your own child?

Ol' Guppy: I have—I’ve raised a ton of ‘em.

Calliope: Ok!

Sol: You want us to just…take your baby?

Ol' Guppy: Yeah, just one of ‘em!

Sol: I don’t know anything about Guppy culture, maybe this is like a thing.

Ol' Guppy: These guys are very finicky eaters, saltwater fish, difficult to maintain—

Calliope: Saltwater—shit. I’m freshwater.

Ol' Guppy: What? You got a freshwater tank?

Calliope: I’m freshwater.

Sol: I’m freshwater too.

Ol' Guppy: Ok, well, you just gotta get a saltwater tank, it’s not a big deal.

Calder: It’s—ok.

Ol' Guppy: If they live, they live for like 200 years. I’m 194.

Calder: It’s a lot of responsibility.

Sol: Wow!

Ol' Guppy: Yeah.

Calliope: Ok. Ok!

Ol' Guppy: Ok.

Calliope: Thank you…

Ol' Guppy: Alright.

Calliope: …so much.

Ol' Guppy: I’m gonna start filling out the paperwork back here with the manager or whatever.

Calder: You’re sure you don’t want to go home and work on a business plan and come back tomorrow or the next day?

Ol' Guppy: AH…I feel like I’ll figure it out. I feel like when you guys already ran the hotel, pretty much, so, we’ll take it from here.

Calliope: What is its name?

Ol' Guppy: What is the fish’s name?

Calliope: The baby.

Ol' Guppy: The baby’s name? I just gunked out a buncha eggs, so—

Calliope: Ok, we’ll call him Gunk!

Sol: Gunk is perfect!

Calliope: Gunk is perfect.

Ol' Guppy: Perfect. Alright.

Calder: Gunk.

Sol: Gunk Jungle!

Ol' Guppy: Alright, be careful out there. Alright. Let me know if you need any room service.

Calliope & Sol: We do.

Ol' Guppy: Yeah.

Calliope: (I look at Gunk, and I think of him saying he gunked all over a bunch of eggs, and I say,) I think I’m actually good. I’m good.

Ol' Guppy: Ok. Well, he’s gonna need to eat every couple hours.

Calder: (incredulous) Couple hours…

Sol: I think, just, you know, like one of everything. Just bring it on up.

Ol' Guppy: One of everything, ok.

Calder: What does Gunk eat?

Ol' Guppy: What does Gunk eat?

Calder: What is Gunk’s diet?

Ol' Guppy: You gotta figure it out.

Calliope: What?

Ol' Guppy: I don’t know!

Calliope: That is not normal for the baby process!

Ol' Guppy: I’m 194 years old, I live to be 200, when do you think the last time I raised kids was!

Calliope: Do you have books that tell me how to raise this child?

Ol' Guppy: I told you. Finicky eaters, saltwater.

Calder: Got it.

Calliope: You don’t have, like, a—

Ol' Guppy: Live to be 200 years old.

Calder: Of course.

Ol' Guppy: Stinks really bad if he dies.

Calder: Really.

Sol: Why—

Ol' Guppy: Yeah.

Sol: So don’t let it die. (Ol' Guppy: Don’t let him die.) That’s a good start for any parent, I’d say.

Calder: (I look at Gunk and I say,) Um, what do you want to eat, kid?

Murph: You see the little guppy just swims up to the side and gives you the stink eye. Just this little green fish with beady little eyes and a big, sad mouth.

Calder: Are you mad at me?

Sol: So like, chicken nuggets?

Gunk: (Gunk noises)

Calliope: (I start just dangling food into the bowl.)

Murph: Give me a persuasion check with disadvantage.

Emily: That’s a three and a four, becomes a twelve.

Murph: Hides in the bottom of the bowl.

Calder: Ok…

Calliope: Ok.

Riaris: Oh, wow.

Jake: Maybe—Calder tries cheese, just like some—some cheese that he has.

Murph: Give me a persuasion check with disadvantage.

Sol: You had cheese this whole time?

Jake: Shout-out to the Two Crew.

Murph: You see he hides in the other corner of the bowl.

Calder: That makes sense.

Murph: You see the bowl starts to get dirty.

Ol' Guppy: Oh, you’re gonna have to change that.

Calder: Yeah, of course.

Ol' Guppy: Yeah, they poop a lot, even though they don’t eat a lot.

Sol: Huh. That’s interesting.

Calliope: Change the bowl…change the bowl…

Ol' Guppy: So just be on the lookout.

Calder: (I run outside the airlock, change the water, come back.)

Murph: You see Riaris puts his hand on your guys’ shoulders.

Riaris: I can take this on, if this is—if that would be better for you guys, and if you think it might be better for Gunk. I know you guys are on the run.

Calliope: I think I kind of want Gunk, but I’m a little worried that Gunk is gonna just freeze when we go up north.

Calder: Will you look after Gunk for us til we get back?

Sol: Yeah, I don’t think we could put a parka on Gunk.

Riaris: Just another reason for you guys to come back soon!

Calliope: (I hand over Gunk, but I’m shaking, like I’ve already formed a bond.)

Murph: You see Kenna holds—you see Kenna puts her hand on your shoulder.

Kenna: (tearfully) We’re gonna miss you, Gunk.

Calder: (I snatch Gunk. I snatch Gunk.) Um, we’ll let—well, we’ll bring him up to the room for the room service and one last feast, don’t you think?

Caldwell: I want to try something real quick.

Calder: We’ll hang out with him for a bit.

Caldwell: Just gonna pour a little bit of a Molson into Gunk’s bowl.

Murph: Go ahead and give me a persuasion check with disadvantage.

Caldwell: HAH! That’s a natural one.

Murph: You see, it looks like Gunk dies.

Sol: AAH—

Calliope: WHAT?

Murph: Turns upside down and begins floating (laughing) towards the top—

Calder: (I rush out and I change the water. I change the water. I change the water! Instantly change the water.)

Calliope: HE’S JOKING, HE’S JOKING!

(unintelligible distress)

Calliope: GUNK! Please, I only just met you and I love you already!

Sol: I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!

Calliope: GUNK!

Murph: You see Gunk flips back up and just kind of looks pissed off.

Calder: (I come in and I push Sol really hard.) What are you doing?

Sol: I deserve that, you’re right. Riaris, clearly we are not ready for a child. I think that you, as the Guardian of the Vibe, this is part of your charge, this is part of your—

Calder: We’re not ready? You’re not ready! I just did cheese, you did beer!

Calliope: I know! I know!

Riaris: (placatingly) Let’s keep the vibe going, ok, let’s get up to that penthouse.

Calliope: I was gonna figure it out…

Riaris: Let’s get up to the penthouse.

Calder: Come on, Gunk.

Murph: You guys get up to this penthouse that looks out into the ocean. You can see all these fish, now free of Gromdall’s influence, sort of swim around happily. You can see the neon of the city in the distance, all these colorful lights that cascade into this big circular room.

Jake: Are there any expensive penthouse snacks, like a Toblerone bar, or, you know, fancy nuts?

Murph: Yeah, you find—

Jake: Can I try to feed Gunk again?

Murph: Yeah, of course, give me an animal handling or persuasion check with disadvantage.

Jake: Ok, that’s a little bit better.

Caldwell: I love the Gunk minigame.

Jake: Fourteen?

Murph: Fourteen? You see that Gunk sniffs a Toblerone bar.

Emily: Ok, ok, what about, are there any, like, healthy granola bars that are a little bit decadent?

Murph: Go ahead and give me an animal handling or persuasion check with disadvantage.

Emily: Dirty twenty.

Murph: Ok! Gunk begins eating the granola bar.

Calliope: It just wanted something nourishing!

Riaris: I don’t know if that’s good for it…

Calliope: He’s just been born!

Riaris: …but he’s eating it, and that’s nice…

Calliope: He knows instinctually that he needs this.

Calder: The young know what they want, indeed.

#not another d&d podcast #naddpod #calliope petrichor #sol bufo #calder kilde #REPOSTING BC I ACCIDENTALLY POSTED A NOT-FULLY-EDITED VERSION TOO QUICKLY lmao

[hekates-corner]

Apothecary Diaries | WN Translation | Arc 9 - Chapter 12

Hey, whichever way you found this: Welcome!

For a couple of reasons I ended up here - I relay all that happens in the chapters, playing wine-aunt, as I translate to the best of my abilities.

So, be warned, all the spoilers are waiting down below. Want spoilers - but less? My dm's/asks are open!

New here? Here's the Masterlist.

Enjoy!

Chapter 12 | Farming

For the next two days, Maomao and the others helped Nenshin with his work.

Which was pretty close to the answer Maomao was looking for.

Narrator-Mao leads us through the explanation that, after putting the hoe in the ground and turning over the damp soil, they found worms, ants and small beetles - as well as long masses/clumps, where a closer look revealed that they were eggs/egg masses.

The chicken that had been pecking at the worms then pecked at the egg mass. In her head she wonders “Locust eggs?”

As narrator she lets us know that she would’ve liked to calculate how many there were per tan, but that she didn’t have the time to do that. Once she found an egg the chicken had missed, she picked it up and put it in a jar.

In her mind she notes how many there must be.

Narrator-Mao goes on talking about how people who hate insects would go crazy about this, even if the contents of her jar are still few. Despite being used to dissecting locusts, it’s not something she wants to see or likes either.

Meanwhile she lets us in on the fact that Lahan-nii, the expert farmer, had a special way of holding the hoe - while Basen had his incredible strength and how different the amount of soil is they have to dig up.

In her head she’s just glad that Basen is doing things right.

Narrator-Mao tells us that she’d been worried he’d refuse, because it’s not the job of a soldier, but apparently she was lucky that Jinshi cared about locusts quite a bit. So, Basen quietly helped her.

Thanks to that, she fills us in, the guards and farmers they’d brought along were also helping her. It looks like they’ll be done with the digging by the end of the day.

In addition, Chue - who had joined before they knew it - was moving around near the two of them, collecting locust eggs. Two children were behind her. They’re the siblings that ate the roasted sweet potato - and they seem to think that if they help they’ll get more of them.

“Maomao-san, there are a lot of them, would you like to see them?”

“Chue-san, I don’t want to see them. If it’s mantis eggs, I’ll take it.”

Mantis eggs, she tells us, are used as a medicine called Sohyosho. Since it can’t be acquired in large quantities, it’s quite valuable. (that’s real btw)

“The eggs here are about to hatch. A small one’s coming out.”

“It’s already spring, isn’t it?”

One generation of flying locusts is as long as 3 months, starting march. It's said that they lay about 100 eggs each at a time. This is what was written in the encyclopedia that was in the Shi clan’s fortress. Those born in spring lay new eggs in summer.

They don’t breed all year round, and at this time of year, the eggs laid in the fall are hatching. The eggs are laid hidden in the ground, exposed by akiko/autumn plowing - and once exposed, they become food for birds and small animals.

Maomao wonders, in her mind, if Lahan (the actual one) hadn’t said that before.

Narrator-Mao notes something about him having mentioned rat/mousecalculation.

One pair of mice births 12 children - making the total 14. Of those 12 children, 6 females and the mother bring 7 more pairs into the world - from which, each of them births another twelve.

Of course, this formula is just a theoretical calculation. Not everything grows without dying.

If the number of locusts were to increase in the same way as this rat-calculation, it will be important to reduce the number at an earlier stage.

She calculates in her head that a mass of locust eggs is about 100, 100 times ten is 1000, 100 times 100 is 10.000.

Narrator-Mao goes on that, if they were to get rid of them now, they could lower the amount of locusts appearing later by many times - and that it seems locusts lay their eggs in areas that are moist to some degree.

She thinks that, since there’s a river nearby and plenty of grass to feed on, this area is the perfect spawning ground.

Then notes as narrator that the reason why they (villagers) didn’t dare to cultivate a field is probably to attract locusts.

At that point Nenshin approaches her, a glass of locust eggs in hand.

“Now all that’s left to do is burn them.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“Ah. Last year I missed a lot of locusts because I was late with this.”

Narrator-Mao recalls that a farmer of this village had also said that they had a lot of damage from locusts the year before.

“Was the yield quite small?” She asks and Nenshin nods.

“We don’t have any savings, just what we eat. If we pay taxes, we’ll starve. We would no longer be able to afford to buy daily necessities from peddlers, so we would have so sell our cattle.”

“But you said that the feudal lord not only exempted you from taxes but also gave you support.”

“That’s right, he’s a really nice lord.” Once again, Nenshin made a face as if he was going to throw up.

Maomao then asks him directly something along the lines of “What is it that you don’t like about that? It seems like you have a thorn in your side/like it's a thorn in your eye.”

Nenshin explains that, he’s not saying this as former bandit, but they(village people) are just trying to take what they can get. To him, they’re like locusts. If you don’t want to starve, you should take proper care of your field - so that you don’t starve.

Maomao asks if "that’s why" - the reason why the fields in this village aren’t well taken care of is that.

Nenshin responds: “That’s right. It was the same with last years bugs.” and goes on to explain that while they were disgusted, looking at their fields being eaten with dismay - the village chief was always thinking about how he could get the sympathy of the lord, always thinking about how he could make him cry. Nenshin felt like a fool, pulling off the locusts that were biting the leaves and killing them one by one.

Narrator-Mao wonders if the fear of past locust plagues has changed Nenshin - because this doesn’t seem like the behavior of a former bandit who has done all kinds of evil deeds.

She then corrects herself in her mind: No, that’s wrong.

As narrator adding that, from the start, Nenshin probably had an earnest/serious personality. He was born and raised as a bandit, so he learned how to use a bow and started killing people as he was told.

Ethics isn’t something you are born with.

“And judging from the current atmosphere in the village, it seems like they received a lot of money.”

“Right. This hasn’t changed in the last ten years. Even if the harvest fails, the lord will help us. He’s a good lord to everyone.”

In her mind she wonders “Good lord..”

Narrator-Mao wonders where the money for this support comes from. It could be extracted from trade. If Saito was that prosperous, it’s fine to send the money to rural areas.

“If you’re making the money, I think it would be better to build at least one of those waterways/canals.”

She goes on, as narrator, that the less labor is involved in transporting water, the more different work can be done. They could even cultivate new fields.

Nenshin admits that that’s what “that man Rikuson” had said too - Maomao replies with a simple “Is that so.”

Narrator-Mao then tells us again that, once she’s back in Saito, she has to find out how Rikuson found out about the former serf’s existence.

(And then, after all this, days worth of work they did for him, mind you……..)

“By the way, I’m sorry to ask you to help me with my work, but don’t you have other business in this village?”

“Business…….” - Maomao rests her chin on the handle of her hoe and closes her eyes.

“Ah!” - Maomao looks around. She approaches Lahan-nii, who isn’t only digging up the soil but also starting to make ridges.

Maomao: We won’t plant anything here.

Lahan-nii: ?!

She thinks “Shit, he’s making his usual face.”

He(?) denies it, but the farmers are completely on board.

“By the way, aren’t you going to spread the popularity of potatoes? I think that’s why you brought the seed potatoes.”

“..... that’s about it.”

It seems like Lahan-nii has something on his mind.

“The people here have no willingness/motivation to work in the fields, right? If they were to produce more potatoes, do you think they would cultivate them properly? They probably won’t use the old fields for new crops, and I don’t think they have the willpower to cultivate new land.”

“Certainly/Indeed.” Maomao is convinved.

Lahan-nii says that that’s why he wanted to meet the only person who cultivated a decent farm.

Maomao catches on, goes “So that’s what it’s about.” but Lahan-nii already knows better as well: “But I don’t think that old man can do it.”

Maomao agrees, with a simple “It’s impossible, I guess.”

The last former serf of this village. In addition to working on his own field, he also has to perform the fall plowing ceremony, which is called a ritual. Work that was supposed to be completed in fall, continuing into the spring, so no matter how you look at it, there’s not enough manpower.

“Can’t we just leave one person here to help?” They look at the other farmers.

Lahan-nii argues that the people he brought with him are here because he is *in case she’s wondering*. It’s not good to be left behind in an unfamiliar place/You can’t just leave them in an unfamiliar land, in the middle of nowhere.

They seem to have been brought all the way from Hisashi-Shuu.

“Right.” - Narrator-Mao notes that Lahan-nii acts like an older brother in the strangest ways - and that, if he had been born into a normal family, he would’ve been a good eldest son. (damn girl)

Lahan-nii adds that he’s glad his father isn’t there - and something about how he said he’d show them the potential of potatoes yet he didn’t actually know what to do. (the second part’s not wanting to be read, clearly.)

Maomao then says something along the lines of “Let’s at least make the sweet potatoes tasty….. Potatoes……” (it’s a fragmented sentence I can’t make full sense of)

Maomao looks at the two children clinging to Chue’s back. She sets down the hoe and approaches them.

“Hey, you want to eat the sweet potato again sometime”

“Want to eat!”

“I want to eat it! I want to eat!”

The sibling's eyes sparkled.

“It’s my first time eating something so sweet. It was sweet like a raisin.”

“Raisins?”

“Sweets are precious around here. There’s no honey and sugar is a luxury item.”

Chue spins around with a large jar on her head.

“... I wonder, can we use that/Could that work?”

Maomao grinned/chuckled and returned to Lahan-nii.

| Notes & Chapter 13

At long last, a chapter that didn't completely hate being translated.

There's not much to say this time. There is the expression thing where it's not quite clear for me if Maomao is pulling an expression or if it's Lahan-nii, but we'll survive that. The same goes with where Nenshin has the thorn.

I honestly just love it for Nenshin that he waited days, until they were about to wrap up all the work, before asking if it's fine for them to spend all their time with his task. Just, gold.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one. I'll see you soon with the next. Stay safe!

#kusuriya no hitorigoto #the apothecary diaries #hekates apothecary

[strandnreyes]

from the sailor lifetime

Carlos curls into TK’s chest, twisting his fingers around the chain that’s ever present on TK’s neck as TK presses a kiss to his forehead. 

He’s silent as he watches Carlos, but after the fifth loop Carlos makes with the metal around his fingers, TK sits up and the chain disentangles from Carlos’ grasp. Before Carlos can question him, he pulls the necklace over his head and holds it in his outstretched palm. 

Carlos looks down at it, and then back up at TK’s small smile. “TK, I cannot take this from you.”

He shoves his hand closer. “You’re not. I’m offering.”

Carlos frowns. “You never part with this.”

“I guess you will have to come home so you can return it to me then,” he shrugs and Carlos’ frown deepens. He sits up as well. 

“I don’t need an incentive to come home.”

“I know.” He closes his hand around the necklace in a fist, biting his bottom lip before he quietly says, “I just want you to have a part of me with you.”

Carlos can’t deny that he wants that more than anything, any bit of TK with him that he can have. He silently studies TK and the way his fingers clench and unclench around the necklace before Carlos nods, bowing his head. 

TK slips the chain over his neck and smiles at him as he brings his head back up. 

Carlos brings a hand to his chest, pressing the weight of it into his skin. “I promise I’ll keep it safe.”

TK brushes a curl away from his forehead. “I do not doubt that.”

Next to the imprint of the small oval, he feels the outline of his own cross and his hands are moving to undo the clasp before he can think twice. 

TK’s hand on his wrist stops him. “No.”

“I want to give you something to remember me by, too,” Carlos protests.

TK cups his cheek sweetly. “I have all of this.” He gestures around them. “Our home. Your pillow, your clothing. All of our belongings. It’s not you, but it’s better than the barren berth of a ship,” he says sadly. 

Carlos nods uneasily. He’s tried not to think of what his living quarters will be. The filth, the crowdedness, the cold, the ever looming danger. 

He focuses back on the room around him now, the home they built together out in the countryside with TK’s earnings from the theater after he performed in his last show. 

It’s nothing grand, but they sell apples and eggs to local markets and while it needed a bit of fixing up in the beginning, it’s peaceful and it’s theirs. A place where they don’t have to pretend to be anyone else. 

Carlos has spent the last few days explaining to TK the tasks that normally were his. Today he showed him how to fix the old latch on the chicken coop that never seems to stay shut. Before TK always delegated the task to Carlos with a laugh and a kiss on the cheek as he claimed that Carlos had the magic touch. That’s not an option anymore.  

“Carlos?” TK asks. 

Carlos’ fingers are still curled around his cross, but he slowly lets it go. “Okay,” he accepts. 

TK looks grateful. “You need a little more faith out there than I do here, anyway,” he says. Neither of them believe in much, but it’s hard not to look for comfort in times like this.

TK slouches further into the mattress, tipping his head onto Carlos’ shoulder. He loves how tactile TK is, especially after sex, but the way he gives more and more of his weight to Carlos means he’s well on his way to drifting off and Carlos isn’t ready for their night to be over. 

“Tell me something I don’t know about you,” he says in an attempt to keep TK alert, but also because he wants to know everything.

TK gives him a funny look at the sudden change in conversation before smiling and easily saying, “You’re the only man I have ever loved.”

Carlos shakes his head and kisses TK sweetly before murmuring, “I know that already.”

TK’s own smile lingers for a moment before twisting into a forlorn look. He drags the blanket higher up his lap and stares down as he wrings his fingers in it. 

“You’re the only one I will ever love,” he whispers like a vow.

Carlos’ body stiffens. “TK—”

He shakes his head once, leaving it facing the opposite of Carlos. “No.”

#911 lone star #tarlos #wip wednesday #tk strand #carlos reyes

[makemeanangelpure]

April 10, 2024- 111.6

I can get back down to 108 by Friday morning by just doing what I do, and keeping to the liquid fast. I tried cooking for myself when Soul left. Nothinh astounding I guess, just an egg sandwich that’s special because it’s what momma used to make me when I was little and her and papa were still together… when they seemed alright at least… but it’s a comfort I guess and ever since I made it for Soul, I’ve been having one sometimes. It’s not the same though. I think eating it just makes me sad. I haven’t seen her in so long. But like momma I’ll make them for him, because he really likes them. Soup is pretty adamant about anything I cook and lately has had such a love for cream cheese chicken that he told me he dreamt about it the other night. Haha. Next time I make that I intend have half of one, take a few bites and then put it in the fridge. Then the time after that not have any do he can work out all 4, as is or I can put a sliced one on a sandwhich like he was drooling about. He’s so cute. I love feeding him after a hard day of missions and/or school activities. So I tried to eat the sandwich earlier… and I just felt… too full and gross… I drank water to try and help the nausea but I wound up getting sick… so I won’t make one for me in awhile… it’s really greasy anyway… I should be eating things more clean like fruit and vegetables and maybe I’ll boil my eggs… cause protein will help will my muscle build and my body will burn more naturally that way during the day so I’ll be super healthy! ^^

Soul is going to get home pretty late after piano practice and basketball with Kid and Blackstar, so he’ll bring something to eat home. Sometimes he’ll eat half with them and finish it home later with me. Our meal times together are usual so it makes me happy hes even subconsciously out of his way to have dinner time with me. Getting sick like that stole my energy, and I want to read some on my rest day today, so I’m having an energy drink. I used to never drink them, but soul has the Reign sometimes and I found sometimes when I’ve uo too late studying, it’s just what I need for a little kick here and there. I’ll get a case maybe when we go grocery shopping Sunday, among more necessary things like toilet paper and tooth paste. I got a part time job to help with living. You know grants can’t pay for everything forever. I’m really happy for soul too, he picked up a few shifts at a record shop we live pretty close too, just a 5 minute drive on his motorcycle, so I don’t have to worry about him being too late when he’s sluggish in moving around, doesn’t have to be there til 11 anyway. I tried so hard to find a bookstore to work at… but nothing was available unfortunately, so I’m making do with retail, working register or organizing shelves. They sell a lot of older items and the people that come in a pretty nice. Tomorrow I get to open the store which is nice. First time doing that so I’m a little nervous. My manager said if I’m still doing well in a month or two, he’s going to move me to the back to help with truck. It would be 7-3 pm shifts. Lots of lifting, tagging merchandise and stacking and the last 3 hours I could be called to go help with register but it would be fun to be promoted and get to basically workout with weights instead of the more cardio base that’s happening now. So yay! I just have to keep it up to get to that point. Which reminds me soul’s birthday is a month and half away now. He’ll be 17 which is amazing for him, I know he’s so excited to be 18, but still just enjoying the moment… I guess he’s taught me that it’s okay to look forward to something but not let it overwhelm you… just enjoy the the ride. The month after I’ll be 16! I know sweet 16 is a big thing, but I really prefer putting together surprises for other people. I almost feel bad sometimes when so much is attention is on me. It will be fun though, I’d really love to just cook everyone something and play games, or go out for sushi and go to an arcade… OR a picnic and swimming party since it’ll be summer time. The hassle of swimsuits though… I mean I don’t mind it… I love swimming and I’ve really missed it… it just going to be kind of embarrassing. I don’t know. The last thing I want to hear is how small my chest is… or I don’t fit a swimsuit right or ‘ of course I’m wearing a one piece.’ I kind of feel like the odd one out. Tsubaki, Liz and Patty and Blaire… they have beautiful womanly bodies… and I’m just different. My momma had a petite frame too- I’m not mad at her for the body she gave me… I can go down a rabbit hole about papa not being satisfied with momma and that’s why he treated… all the women I see him with definitely look a certain way. Whatever. If we swim for my birthday… I might even recommend it and I’m sure the others would bounce on the idea… beach volleyball… the boys would love. Liz would drag me and tsubaki to go tan a little while, so warm in the sun, and Patty and kid could make amazing sand castles and giraffes. Haha. Soul would be happy about popsicles. Creamsicle sounds so good!

I’m blabbering so much but I haven’t really said everything out loud before… or written it down really I just think about everything.

So swimming in two months and half potentially, well actually it’s for sure going to happen that sounds so fun. Liz will love if I ask her to help me find a nice swimsuit, and be totally positive about me getting a two piece. I think I will… maybe it can be light blue or white? My body and face is still really soft. I guess you could call it baby fat, and being more active lately, being more carful about what I eat, I can kind of see a bit of toned stomach action happening. I’m excited for what I can achieve in two months and even the one you know? Getting rid of baby fat and butterflying cacooning into my more young adult body will be good. I’m always going to be small and I’m trying to work on being okay with that, so I just have to make myself as proud as possible of the way I look. I’m going to look strong and healthy, so what if I don’t have the greatest curves, I’ll have skinny curves… angles and definition that I earned by working so hard. I’m almost 5’3 instead of 5’0 now from when we first moved in together and I was 14 so my baby weight is evening out and gosh soul is growing too. He already called me shorty but sometimes he looks down at me in such this smug way, like he’s so cool for being taller. He’s almost 5’7 now. I assume he’ll stop growing at 5’9 since I think Wes is around there or 5’10. Soul has always looked really handsome and like me, he’s growing into a more young adult version of himself, angels of his facial features a little more sharper, shadowed by a vague sleepiness like always, more movement to the way his scar runs along his chest in abdomen from natural definition. He’s the type of person to not workout barely at all, and look like he must go 3 days a week and eat like a clean freak, but nope, typical boy like Blackstar to be able to hork down unhealthy food and still look like he puts the work in. Ah being young with a great metabolism. Haha.

Oh what else…?

Oh yeah, last I made an entree, I was saying how I was nervous to get my hair cut, to repair damage and try something new for the warmer weather. Liz got highlights in her hair too, and even trimmed her front hair pieces ( evenly of course) to frame her face; it looks so pretty she’s like one of those victorious secret models. Tsubaki didn’t cut her hair, just a basic trim. She so pretty all the time, and Patty did a more blunt look with her bangs. My hair is shoulder length now, so we took 5 inches of dead hair off. It’s a big change. I can’t really wear my hair in pigtails right now in my normal mid spot because the hair at the nape of my neck is just barely too short to stay pulled up. I can do really tiny low pigtails but it’s really not helping with my “ growing up glow up” as the Thompson put it. I’ve been wearing it in half up pigtails when we’ve gone on missions so my hair isn’t swinging around in my face, like I did for the dance two years ago. But my hair will be around my upper arms in October, and then I’ll fully put my hair up again, and it won’t matter if it’s a more girlish hairstyle, I’ll be so confidently me by then it won’t even matter and I can pull off anything. Since I’ve lost some baby weight, I’ve noticed Soul doesn’t really knock at me having ‘ fat ankles ‘ anymore like he used to joke. Maybe he realized it hurt my feelings or i actually did have bigger legs and don’t anymore… if so then goodbye preteen fat. He’s been sweet too, picking me up from the couch to carry me to bed and either he’s just proud of how strong he is, but doesn’t brag because that wouldn’t be cool, or I’m actually fun to pick up because… like me lifting him in scythe form, it’s not a challenge? Rather than poking fun at me in what feels like an almost mean, taunting way, he’s been calling me ‘ itty bitty’ and ‘ little maka’ when he’s done his proud looking down at me..: or we’re just walking around town and sat for some deathbucks and he just kinda set his hand over mine, emphasizing how he could hide my fingers completely with his, sounding like he was marveling instead of mocking me when he said, “ you’re so tiny.” His comments are sounding more like compliments than half annoyed jabs, and I guess it’s him just becoming g more mature? Either way, it’s made me feel really nice and even a little more proud of my petite stature. If my partner thinks it’s cute rather than unattractive and off putting, then why should I feel so bad? He hasn’t said anything about my chest in awhile… maybe because I’m not so flat chested anymore? I did go from an A32 to a B32, and I think honestly where my chest size will be sitting at even when I’m momma’s age. Maybe he’s noticed I’ve grown a little… maybe he’s too embarrassed to say anything? Maybe it wouldn’t be cool to point out my chest or body changing at all because he doesn’t want to get slapped with a book? I’m overthinking everything… but doesn’t it feel kind of nice imagining he’s been able to see me grow and evolve some the same way I’ve seen him. I just texted him to tell him I’m proud of him. I know how much it bothers him his parents not approving of his work and how he’s going his own way about things apart from his family’s expectations. We were hugging a few months back after a slight argument I don’t even really remember what it was about but we were hugging about frogging eachother afterwards and I teared up telling him how proud I was of him if he ever felt like no one saw how hard he was working, I did. I feel his soul swell with emotion, and he’d tighten his hold on me, uttering a cool thank you, though I’d heard the way his breath shook like he was soft. I keep thinking about that day a lot, so I hope even when I don’t say it, he knows how proud I am of him. I know he’s proud of me too, especially lately trying to be nicer to papa, comforting me too when plans with him don’t really work out. I cried on his chest a few weeks ago when I made plans with papa and he forgot… too drunk when he’d been talking to me I guess to remember because when I went where we supposed to meet

#ed vent

[bluiex]

(Pt 6 of Adoption AU)

The next day, Scar, Ranboo, and Tommy went the hardware store. Tubbo had stayed behind cause Grian had asked him if he’d like to help in gathering honey and eggs.

“So what do we need to get again” Ranboo asked.

“Just some extra nails screws, and planks of wood” Scar replied.

“Can I get the nails and screws” Tommy offered.

“Sure of course, they’ll be in the building material section, just come to me once you get them, I’ll be in the wire fencing section” Scar responded.

Tommy ran off down the isle, while Ranboo stood by Scar.

“What can I do” Ranboo asked.

“You can help carrying the fence coil, you’ll need to be careful though, the ends are very sharp” Scar said.

“Got it” Ranboo nodded.

Scar and Ranboo ended up get 5 coils of wire fencing, just as Tommy was running towards them, with a box of nails and screws in hand.

“Is that everything” Ranboo asked.

“No, we still need to get the wood” Scar explained.

Both Ranboo and Tommy nodded.

(With Grian and Tubbo)

“How many eggs often are there” Tubbo asked, holding a basket, and looking over at Grian, who was unlocking the doors to the chicken nest.

“Usually 13, sometimes 17” Grian replied.

“That’s a lot of eggs, how many do you and Scar use” Tubbo said.

“Usually just 8, and we put the rest in the fridge, though now with you, Ranboo, and Tommy, we had to use 12” Grian explained.

“Oh, I see” Tubbo responded.

“Can you bring the basket over” Grian asked.

“Sure” Tubbo said, he brought the basket over and set down on the ground.

Grian put 7 eggs in the basket. He closed and locked the door to the nest, and then went on to the next door. There were 5 eggs in that one, and then 8 in the nest, and another 7 in the last one. So together, there was 27 eggs.

“That’s the most we ever gotten” Grian said cheerfully.

Grian went to put the eggs in the house, while stayed outside, watching the chickens. There were blond chickens, brown chickens, black and white chickens, and white chickens.

When Grian had came back, he was wearing a bee suit, and was holding up a smoker. He had put paper and hot charcoal in it, so it was smoking.

“Don’t stand to close Tubbo, our bees are usually friendly, but I still don’t want to risk you getting stung” Grian warned.

Tubbo did as told and stood back, and just watched from affair. Grian opened the box, and bees began to swarm. Grian began pumping smoking in the air where the bees were swarming.

“The smoke helps calm the bees, and covers up their aggression fermions, so it’s less likely they’ll try to sting me” Grian explained.

Tubbo only nodded, taking it in.

Grian put down the smoker and drew out a honey comb wall, it was completely gold and dripping with honey. Grian took out a glass jar, and began to scrape the honey out of the honey combs, and into the jar. Once it was full, he closed it and then repeated the process. After some time, there was 5 jars of honey.

Tubbo helped carry them back inside, and set them on the counter.

At that moment, Scar, Tommy, and Ranboo came through the door. Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo went to go play, while Grian and Scar spoke.

“How did it go” Grian asked.

“Great, Ranboo and Tommy are great helpers” Scar answered.

“That’s good, Tubbo was helpful to, helping me gather eggs and honey” Grian said.

“Great, how much did we get this time” Scar asked.

“5 jars and 27 eggs” Grian responded.

“That more we’ve gotten so far” Scar replied.

“Yup, and I’m thinking of making begets with some honey” Grian explained.

“Mmm, good idea” Scar nodded.

“How long to do we have to build this fence and gate, before the goats, sheep, and rams get here” Grian questioned.

“5 weeks, so I’m going to go get started now” Scar replied.

“Alright, good luck” Grian responded.

Scar went out to start on the fence, while Grian started up on lunch.

Tommy would totally come back with a hammer just to hold onto and swing around- Scar struggling to get him to put it down only for Ranboo to join in an mock fight in the middle of the store

#bluie gets an ask poggers #long post #scarian hcxdsmp #hcxdsmp

[lifewithoutmeds]

may 17, 2023

Day 4 of AH’s routine, and i think it’s going pretty well.

i don’t have a lot of difficulty getting up around 6/6:30 and i’m kinda used to morning walks but they’d become less regular now that i don’t have a dedicated dog to walk, it’s not hard to walk 10-15 minutes on my own. it’s kinda nice because it’s like the streets are mine, the world is mine. also i kinda like drinking electrolyte/lemon water so that’s not a chore. and i’ve uh sorta started to like my cold showers too, so .... so far so good.

today i did all the things. the morning routine, the full shower, the checking off of the checklist, and hit all my marks with my weight loss: 15k steps, 80-100 grams of protein, 20 minute strength training, and caloric deficit. i didn’t sleep too well last night so i’m going to try and wind down a little earlier and see if i can stay off my phone starting at around 8 and i’ll try to just read before sleeping.

i have noticed though, and maybe it’s not causal, but my sleep has been better for the past couple days (with last night as an exception.) i also feel less inclined to nap during lunch and because i need my 15k it’s almost impossibly without at least a 30 minute mid-day walk.

excited to be camping next week. trying to carve out a bit of time each day starting today in preparing for it, writing my lists of what i need to bring, going over my fishing rods/tackle. rhi won’t be able to make it so i’ll be on my own, until LD and her gf meet me later. it’ll be my first time camping alone! a little scared and a little excited. i also started listening to a podcast about how much diet affects the brain/mood/psychological disorders. apparently ketosis, fasting, and many drugs were first used to help epilepsy, and there’s starting to be studies on how they can help with major psychiatric disorders such as schizophrenia, anxiety, and depression. people with chronic disorders who are “treatment-resistant” have found themselves much improved by changing their diet and i’m wondering whether i’m just psyching myself out or there really is a causal nature to how i’m feeling these days and my limiting my intake of sweets/refined carbs and looking to load up on protein. i’m finding that i almost have to supplement my protein and/or eat More because i’m just not getting enough from my normal foods. i think i have to eat some combination of chicken and eggs daily to get my requisite protein needs.

anyhoo. feeling hopeful. 

[wordofthewicked]

Showtime- Paul Lahote

Fic description: A chance meeting one sunny afternoon on La Push brings you face to face with Paul Lahote. Your strange connection with him, and the fact that it was his soccer ball that broke your nose, you were wrapped up into an unseen world that lived in tandem with yours. How far are you willing to go for true love? How far are you willing to go to protect the people you love?

TW: eating, cursing (expect cursing a lot honestly. I know these boys had terrible cursing habits.)

Part One Part Three

General Masterlist

Showtime Masterlist

~~~

Part Two

When you entered the house, the chattering died down, all eyes on you. The group was sitting down at a small table, squished against each other with plates filled with food.

“Paul, Y/N! You’re just in time for dinner.” A beautiful woman spoke, smiling at you from the kitchen. You smiled back at her, a little uneasy with the unfamiliar group.

Paul ushered you forward and sat you down next to him. Your chairs were farther away from everyone else’s, which just added to the squeezed in effect they had going on. You quietly sat down as Paul immediately began piling his plate full of chicken legs and something that looked like beef on a stick. You were thankful you couldn’t smell, as you were sure you would be nauseous at the fumes of all the meat. You had been a vegetarian since you were 13- a small act of teenage rebellion you never quite gave up on.

The women, Emily you were assuming, cleared her throat from the kitchen, glaring at Paul. “Would you serve them first?”

Paul, mid chew, looked over at you and put his chicken down, realizing he didn’t offer you anything first. He smiled at you bashfully, a look that seemed out of place on his face. “I’m sorry, what do you want? You more of a chicken or beef kinda person?”

“I’m not hungry.” You replied, smiling at him.

He tilted his head at you, sensing your unease. “It’s 7pm. You were at La Push before us, so you couldn’t have eaten since noon at the earliest. You should at least try, even if you’re not hungry.”

“I don’t… eat.” You replied, then sighed. “I mean, I don’t eat meat.”

“You’re a vegan?” Paul asked, eyes wide with interest.

“Vegetarian.” You answered, sitting back in your chair.

Paul realized that you were obviously disgusted by the meat, and scooted it away from you. “Okay… why don’t we go somewhere and pick you up food? I’m sure there’s places around here that have stuff you could eat.”

Emily laughed from the kitchen, shaking her head. “Finally a use for all the vegetables I buy. Do you eat eggs? I could whip up a sort of chef salad. I don’t have any tofu, but I think I’ve got some chickpeas…”

“You don’t have to make anything special for me. I should be getting home soon anyway.” You answered, realizing that you’d have a lot of explaining to do to your parents once they saw your bandaged nose and bruised eyes.

“Stay!” Paul yelled, a little too loudly, his eyes wide in desperation. “I mean, this is fun, don’t you think?”

“You assaulting me? Or the subsequent hospital visit?” You joked, smiling at him. “Either way, I do have to return to my family before they put out a search warrant. And my dad is very good friends with Charlie, so they’ll come looking.”

“They wouldn’t find you here.” Jacob laughed, “Too isolated. Plus wouldn’t they search Forks, first?”

“Probably not when my last whereabouts are at the hospital with two shirtless men with matching tattoos. I’m sure Dr. Cullen would know exactly who I was with.” You shot back, your tone mostly playful, but boarding a bit on serious.

Really hot mysterious strangers you have a connection with are still strangers and you had some sort of sense to remember that.

“Nonsense. Everyone who sits around this table is family. So sit tight, I’ll fix you something to eat, and I’ll stock up on tofu and vegetarian cook books for next time.” Emily ordered, putting her hands on her hips in a way you couldn’t say no to.

You also tried not to let it show how it affected you when she said “next time”, and pushed down the butterflies it had formed. Perhaps Emily knew something more about Paul’s liking towards you…

~~~

You had been introduced to a lot of people, names flying past you faster than you could keep up with. You knew Jacob, which made things slightly easier. And you had met Quil and Embry on La Push once before- but they never seemed to be more than a few feet from each other, so which was which, you didn’t know.

The dynamic was interesting, to say the least. They acted more like a family than anything else, but the connection they all had wasn’t clear. Sam, Emily, and Leah were 21- which made their enjoyment of hanging out with 15/16 year olds a bit confusing. Though, Jared and Paul were both 19, so it was odd for them as well. Perhaps there were family ties in them- the population on the reservation was small, so they could all be cousins as far as you knew.

You had spent the night mostly glued to Paul’s side, not really understanding the way he calmed you. New people weren’t always your favorite thing- especially large groups of them. Especially large groups of mostly guys. Still, you didn’t feel threatened by them, instead you felt you had an odd magnetic pull into the welcoming energy they created.

Paul had insisted on driving you home without anyone else, and you were a bit nervous to be alone with him. Sure, you were alone together in the hospital room, but there were nurses coming back and forth, and Dr. Cullen had been there for a while, too.

You two mostly sat in silence, appreciating the cool air coming in from the slightly opened windows. You were still wrapped in Paul’s jacket- and you wondered if it smelled like him. You directed him through the familiar streets, before you had arrived at your family home. It wasn’t late- only 10- so your parents wouldn’t be worried about you. You hesitated in the car, not quite wanting to leave yet.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Paul asked suddenly, smiling at you.

“Nothing.” You responded immediately.

“Good. I’ll be by to pick you up at 3.” He replied, looking you up and down. “And you can keep the jacket. It looks good on you.”

You had to resist the urge to melt at his words, and instead wished him a good night, and shuffled into your house.

Your parents were sitting together on the couch, watching some movie you didn’t recognize. You called out to them as you entered, making them turn around to greet you.

“Hi sweetheart, how was the beach?” Your mom asked, her eyes meeting yours. Suddenly her face went pale and she stood up in alarm, rushing forward to you. “What the hell happened to you? Are you alright?”

Your father followed in suit, hearing the alarm in your mother’s voice. Suddenly they were both standing in front of you, concern written on their faces.

“It’s fine- it looks worse than it is. I got hit in the face with a rogue soccer ball while laying on the beach. My nose is broken, but I went to the hospital and had them set it.” You answered, shrugging nonchalantly.

“We would’ve met you there! Call us next time, alright?” Your mother ordered, pulling you in for a hug. “Just because you’re 18 now, doesn’t mean you get to go off and stop letting us take care of you.”

“Whose jacket is that?” Your father asked, eyeing the black leather in sustain.

“Just a friend’s, dad. It got cold on the beach. I’ll give it back to him tomorrow.” You answered, trying to dissuade his suspicious glare.

“Mmm… alright. Well, go get some ready for bed- you’ll need rest to heal. I’ll make you some cocoa and bring it up along with an ice pack.” He responded, leaning over to pull you into a hug and kiss the top of your head. “Seriously- call us next time. We’re always here.”

“I know. I love you both.” You replied, hopping up the stairs and nearly dancing into your room.

You were seeing Paul tomorrow, and that made you all the more ready to head to sleep and for the day to end as fast as it could.

~~~

You were waiting patiently, well mostly patiently, for Paul to show up. It was 2:57, and you were pacing in front of your door. Your parents had gone out for the afternoon, so you felt comforted that you at least didn’t have to be embarrassed about your excitement. Plus, it meant neither of them would ask questions about the unfamiliar car picking you up.

At exactly 3:00 on the dot, Paul’s pickup rolled to a stop in front of your house. You immediately shot out the door, all but running to him and getting inside the truck.

“Eager, are we?” Paul laughed, smiling widely at you.

You shrugged and clicked your seatbelt on. “Perhaps. What’s the agenda for today?”

At this, Paul’s body language changed drastically, his face losing its smile and his hands tightening on the wheel. “We’re going back to Sam and Emily’s. Just to hangout again, like last night.”

You were a bit disappointed you wouldn’t be alone, but you also already had the feeling that him and his friends were some weird package deal. “Alright. Sounds good.”

The ride into the forest was quiet and oddly tense. Something you said had set Paul off, or bothered him at the very least. You didn’t have the slightest clue what it could be though- you had only asked one question. Maybe it was something else entirely, something waiting for you two back at the cabin.

When you guys arrived, Paul hesitated this time, seeming like he had something he wanted to say, but couldn’t quite find the words. He took the keys out of the ignition silently, and got out of the truck, slamming his door a little more forcefully than you thought normal.

Still, he arrived on your side of the truck and opened your door, helping you down gently. He held on to your arm, though by the way he kept glancing down, it seemed like he wanted to hold your hand. In a rush of bravery, you slipped your hand into his, interlocking your fingers as you walked forward. You watched his shoulders visually perk up a bit, and you assumed his weird mood most certainly wasn’t your fault.

Paul led you to the side of the house, where a whole group of people were waiting for your arrival. It was the pack, and they watched you two approach. You noticed there was a girl there you didn’t recognize. She was wrapped in Jared’s arms, so you assumed it was the girlfriend he had mentioned. You thought her name was Kate or Kim or something along those lines.

They were all standing in a half circle, facing towards you and Paul. You felt uneasy- like you were about to be put on a trial or something. Was this a cult thing? You were about to be voted in or out?

“Y/N, I’m glad to see you again.” Sam greeted, nodding at you. “Paul has… a few things to explain to you.”

You untangled your hands and took a few steps back, narrowing your eyes at him. “Paul…”

“No, okay- look. I know this seems really weird, but I need to show you something. And it is really weird, and strange, and it might seem frightening at first. Please, please don’t run away, okay?” Paul begged, his eyes full of uncertainty.

Emily reached out and touched your shoulder, pulling you into her side, and backing up to stand inline with Sam and Embry/Quil. The two men stood slightly in front of you then, as if shielding you from something.

“Please, just… don’t run away and don’t leave. I promise I’ll explain everything.” Paul spoke again.

You nodded, a sharp spike of fear running through your veins. Whatever was about to happen was going to change your life in some way- that was certain.

And it did. Paul closed his eyes and began shaking, his body twisting and contorting in unnatural ways before he burst forward, exploding into a form of fur, and paws, and teeth. Standing before you was a large wolf- bigger than any you had ever seen before. He was silver and grey, a beautiful mixture of the two, as his fur shone in the afternoon sun.

As suddenly as your fear had began, it vanished. This was not scary. This was absolutely absurd. This man, this incredibly attractive man, who had taken a great deal of interest in you, was a fucking wolf. Clear as day, you watched his body transform into the massive beast.

You stood still, trying to comprehend what had happened. Emily shook you slightly, calling out your name. You ignored her, still staring forward at Paul. His eyes were the same dark brown and worried as they were before, and if it weren’t for that small detail, you would have been certain this was some sort of elaborate prank.

Then, the wolf began shrinking, fur sliding back into ochre skin, paws becoming hands once more. And, to your horror, back into a completely naked Paul.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” He asked, taking a step towards you.

At this movement, you looked down, then blushed and shielded your eyes. “Oh my god- why are you naked?”

“I- what?” Paul asked, defeat in his tone. “I just turned into a wolf and you’re concerned about me being naked?”

“Yes! I mean, no. The wolf thing was fucking weird enough, I don’t need to see you naked right now, too.” You answered, silently wishing you were anywhere else.

Kim- whose name suddenly came into your mind- was smiling widely at you, whispering something to Jared. You kept your eyes averted until Paul confirmed he was decent again. You looked at him again, but still found it hard to make eye contact.

“I know it’s crazy.” He began, moving forward towards you.

You put your hand up, stopping him from moving and stepping away from Emily’s arms. “Do you? Do you think it’s crazy? Why- what the fuck was that? What is the whole point of this? Why would you… are…”

“I’m sure you have a lot of questions. Why don’t we go inside-“ Sam began, gesturing to the cabin.

“No. No I want… I need answers, first. You can’t just show me you can turn into wolves and then expect me to come sit on your couch and pretend that’s normal.” You argued, taking another step back.

Paul didn’t move towards you again, stress evident in his features. “Okay. Yes, we’re wolves. We’re shapeshifters.”

“All of you?” You asked, looking at Emily and Kim.

“Not them, no. But the rest of us are- including Leah.” Paul answered, nodding at me. “It’s a genetic thing- passed down from our ancestors.”

“So… you’re mutants.” You replied, tilting your head. “If it’s a genetic thing, you’re mutants, not shapeshifters.”

“I… guess? I don’t think we’re well studied by biologists.” He replied, eyeing you weirdly.

You nodded back at him, closing your eyes. “Okay, sorry. Mutants is a harsh word. But… you’re wolves. You turn into very large wolves.”

“Yes.”

“And you… probably don’t tell people often. Because that would cause a lot of chaos.”

“Correct.”

“So… why are you telling me?”

Paul didn’t answer, so you opened your eyes, looking at him with interest. The question struck a nerve- he didn’t want to answer it.

“Paul…?” You prompted, unconsciously moving closer to him.

He sighed, shaking his head. “This conversation might go a little bit easier in private.”

“This can’t be worse than the wolf thing.” You offered, smiling a bit at him.

“Depends on how you look at it.” Jacob piped up, which earned him a punch from Embry/Quil.

“Why don’t the three of us go inside, and we can explain the rest in there.” Sam offered again, his tone more authoritative this time, making you feel the urge to listen.

You followed Paul into the house, keeping a bit of distance from him. You sat across from him and Sam, looking at the two of them expectingly.

“Right… uh. So obviously you know about the wolf thing, and uhm… we’re different. Than humans, you know, even if we’re not phased at the moment. Our body temperatures run warmer, small things like that, for instance. And uh… well. There’s this other thing called… imprinting.” Paul began, stammering slightly as he searched for the right words to say to you.

“Basically, it’s kinda like… soulmates, I guess. We don’t know for sure why it happens, or how it chooses, but it does. And when you make eye contact with your imprint for the first time, everything changes. Your world completely shifts point of view, nothing else that came before or after will matter more than this. Like someone turned on a light in a dark room for the very first time- that sort of clarity, you just know.”

You sucked in a sharp breath, thinking over his words. “Did… did you imprint yesterday? When you came over to help me clean up the blood?”

“Yes.”

—————

Tag List:

@sorrow-and-bliss @fangirling-4-ever

#twilight #wolf pack #sam uley #jared cameron #paul lahote #embry call #jacob black #quil ateara #leah clearwater #seth clearwater

[finelinevogue]

Can we get some more brother!harry?

I really enjoyed your piece where he caught her smoking ❤️

of course you can!! (rip if your name is natalia) hope this is what you wanted;

Natalia.

Beautiful name to juxtapose a horrible excuse of a human being.

Harry was never that great when it came to choosing his girlfriends, but this one was by far the worst. Bekka had been bad, because she had been cheating on Harry with her best friends dad. India was just so toxic, to the point where she’d ask Harry why he wasn’t mad with her over the most trivial things as if she wanted him to be mad. Daya was ok, but she wanted different things to what Harry wanted and so they ended up in a massive argument and ending things quicker than they started. Natalia though, wow. She was something else and that wasn’t a compliment.

You don’t know whether it was just because she targeted you especially, but she was just a downright cruel person. You could easily tell her intentions with your brother were not good. She was a plain ol’ gold digger, evident from the credit card that Harry leant her and she spent so much on it the bank had to call Harry to ask him to authorise that he was aware of the amount of money being spent. She bought a car with his card. A fucking car. Harry was too blinded by her beauty and her experience that he was oblivious to her witchy behaviour towards you. It wasn’t like you hadn’t tried to tell him either, it was more that he didn’t care enough.

“No Harry. No.” You argued with him, standing in the middle of the kitchen as he was busy washing the rest of the dishes in the sink. It was just the two of you home at the moment, because Gemma and Anne were spending the weekend at an exclusive spa in Cheshire, so you didn’t understand how there were so many dishes.

“Y/N, it’s not an option. You’re not staying at home by yourself.” Harry spoke sternly back to you, letting out his frustration by vigorously scrubbing the dishes.

“I’m literally 17 - 18 in like 3 weeks. I’m more than capable of staying home.” You stomped your foot to the ground like a child.

“And I don’t care. You’re coming to lunch whether you want to or not.” Harry finished the last plate and dries his hands on the towel next to the sink, before throwing it over to you.

“But she’ll be there.”

“She’s my girlfriend, so you’ll nice to her.”

“If she’s nice to me, then yeah.” You rolled your eyes and walked over to the sink to start drying the dishes that Harry just cleaned.

“ Y/N, I swear to God.” Harry groaned in frustration, tugging a stressful hand through his hair. “Can you at least pretend to be happy for me for once?”

“Gee Harry, i’m just so happy to be going out to lunch with you and your girlfriend!” You put on the biggest grin as your sarcasm practically dripped from your tongue.

“Stop being a spoilt little shit and finish those dishes. We’re leaving in 20.” Harry spoke harshly, before leaving the room with a heavy strop to his step. It left you to blink back the tears that you couldn’t help that Natalia was ruining your whole relationship with your brother.

You and Harry used to be so tight nit, now it would be a miracle if he spent a day with you per month. Natalia had come along 5 months ago and she had completely turned Harry’s life around for the worst, only Harry was too ignorant to see that. Anne had come home multiple times to find you crying because Harry had cancelled on you, again, or Natalia had said something that had really hurt. Normally you were okay with taking hate, but Natalia made it somehow worse than that. Even if Anne or Gemma tried to talk Harry about the damage all this was causing you it would always be the same response;

“She just wants attention.”

The restaurant was very pretty.

It was one that you and Harry used to go to all the time, when there was no girlfriend around. It sold the best pastries and life-changing eggs on toast. The food was always delicious and the staff were so completely lovely. You were glad to be coming here, making you feel more comfortable than you would if you went to a expensive fancy restaurant instead. This little restaurant, named ‘Lemon Puffs’ after their infamous lemon, cream and pastry puffs, made you feel safe and happy.

“Remember to just be nice.” Harry spoke as you both approached the table that Natalia was already sat at. She was too busy on her phone to realise you were even here.

“If she plays nice then yeah.” You bit back.

“Y/N just stop being petty, y’pissing me off now.” Harry argued. “Whine like a bitch later. I don’t need it today.”

You stopped talking after that, not having anything else to say to him. He’d made it very clear that you were only here because he didn’t trust you at home by yourself, but by the same token wanted you quiet because he didn’t trust you enough to speak nicely. Harry hugged and kissed Natalia like he hadn’t just seen her last night and then sat down opposite to her, leaving you to sit next to Harry because you sure as hell weren’t sitting next to her. Natalia didn’t even make the effort to hug you or shake hands, in fact you barely got a simple hello.

“You alright, baby?” Natalia asked, twirling her hand into Harry’s from across the table. Disgusting.

“Yeah i’m good. This one’s a pain in my arse, as always.” Even with his joking tone, you knew he was being somewhat serious and that really messed with you.

“Typical.” Natalia rolled her eyes and tutted her tongue, not hesitating to use the opportunity to be mean to you. Harry thought she was merely playing along with his words, but you new otherwise.

“You know what you want yet?” Harry asked as he pulled his own attention towards the menu. You didn’t need to look at the menu, as being here so many times has allowed you to discover the perfect order.

“I think i’m just going to get the salad, but without the chicken, cheese or cucumber.” She answered, sipping on the water she must’ve already ordered whilst waiting for you both.

“So just lettuce?” You asked, not meaning for it to be a condescending question and yet she took it that way anyways.

“Is there something wrong with that, Y/N?” She asked, being really harsh in the way she spoke your name - as if the syllables actually caused her pain to speak.

“N-no I was just—”

“Didn’t think so.” She snapped and turned away from you to look back towards Harry, with her shit-eating grin that didn’t fool you. Harry kicked you leg under the table too, not appreciating the way you were speaking to Natalia. He didn’t even think about the way his girlfriend was speaking to you though. As usual.

“I’ll probably get the salad too.” Harry nodded his head and you shook your head as he spoke. Harry would never normally get a salad. Like, that’s so Kardashian of him. Harry, whenever he came here with you, always ordered a cheese and pickle panini, with extra crunchy pickles, a portion of chips and some halloumi fries too. Oh and then a cake for pudding. He wouldn’t have gone for a boring salad. Fucking Natalia was ruining him and you hated to have a front row seat of it.

“Not the usual then?” You tried to joke with him, but he was clearly still pissed off with you for being… you.

“Why, are you?” He asked quizzically.

“Obviously.” You smiled, which made Harry smile for a split second before Natalia pulled him away from you. Your smile disappeared and a frown settled in, knowing it would stay there for a long time.

“Babe, I am here too you know?” Natalia joked, bur you could see the anger and jealousy behind her eyes. If looked could kill you’d be ten feet under, twenty times over by now.

“Sorry, yeah.” Harry cleared his throat and paid closer attention to her.

Lunch went by slowly.

Natalia scoffed when she heard your order; poached eggs on toast with three pieces of crispy bacon on the side, a portion of chips and a mint iced tea. Oh and a cake for pudding, but you’d come to that later. Natalia ate her lettuce as Harry eat his salad as you ate your eggs on toast with bacon and chips. You loved the food, hated the company and couldn’t make up your mind whether you loved or hated being here. Natalia and Harry talked throughout lunch, leaving you out of all their conversations. The only time Harry spoke to you was when he asked whether your food was okay, eyeing it up as if he wanted to make love to it and send his salad to the nearest dumpster.

“Was everything alright for you?” Paul, the owner of the business and dude in charge of the eggs asked you when all your plates were empty as Harry’s growling stomach.

“Lovely, thank you.” Harry responded gratefully.

“Perfect.” You smiled as you handed your dirty plate to Paul.

“It was a bit plain.” Natalia moved her plate away from her in disgust and Paul put on his best customer smile, apologising for that before leaving to go and ring up the bill.

“Okay i’m just going to go for a quick wee before I pay.” Harry announced, getting up from the table to go to the loo.

“Okay babe. Don’t be too long.” She called out and then it was left just you and her.

“Well this was nice.” You tried to be nice, as Harry told you to, and start a meant conversation with your arch enemy. Kill ‘em with kindness - that was Harry’s slogan wasn’t it?

“If you hadn’t have been here then yeah.” She turned her nose up at you.

“Look,” you began, wanting her to understand something, “whatever i’ve done to upset you and make you hate me, i’m sorry. Just, I don’t want you to dislike me and I know that Harry really likes you so I want us to be able to get along.”

“Listen, Y/N,” there it was again - your name spoken with dripping venom, “I don’t want to get along with you. You make me sick. You are such a baby to Harry and you’re needy, which means I don’t get to spend time with my boyfriend—”

“Don’t get to spend time with him?” You had to laugh at that. Apart from today, you’d seen Harry maybe a total of 2 hours this whole week and it was Saturday. “You’re practically attached at the hip.”

“Not enough. Harry needs to keep away from you, you only bring him trouble.”

“I’m his fucking sister.” You shouted quietly, not wanting to disturb the peace for the rest of the customers.

“Not an excuse. Look Y/N, I understand that you are quite lonely and don’t have many friends? Maybe you should consider that’s for a very good reason?” She rhetorically asked you and that made you sit back a bit. She was pulling apart your insecurities now and exposing them to find the most painful parts, so she could watch you suffer with only the curse of her words.

“It’s not like that.” You tried to convince yourself more than her, tears in your eyes over something so hurtful to you.

“No? ‘Cause I think that you aren’t the kind of person anyone wants around, including Harry.” She stood up dusted herself off as he noticed Harry walk back over to the table, smiling as if she hadn’t just shot his sister in the heart.

Her words stung more than a scorpions tale, and yes unfortunately you knew what that felt like. Natalia was right. You were alone, friendless and just trouble. There was a reason that you were all of this and Natalia had hit the nail right on the head with the reason why. You thought of your friends, his they always disappeared and left you and now you sit in the canteen alone or hang out only with yourself on the weekends. You think to Gemma and Anne going away for the weekend, not inviting you because it was age restrictive but you still couldn’t help but think there was a more pressing reason than that. Then you think of Harry and how he was fed up of you. He couldn’t be more resentful of you if he tried. You wanted to be a good friend, a good daughter and most importantly a good sister, but it was so blindingly obvious that you weren’t. You were never going to be.

You stood up from the table too, quickly wiping away a tear from your face before anyone could notice but you didn’t care to see if anyone was actually watching. Harry kissed Natalia and then walked over to the cashier to pay the bill. You noticed Paul and Harry talking and so you walked out of the restaurant and towards the car, still tears in your eyes. You needed to be strong for yourself though, especially because nobody else was going to be.

You stood with you handle to the door of the car waited for Harry to come and unlock it. You heard high heels before the car was unlocked, unfortunately.

“Excuse me, but I ride front.” Natalia spat at you, removing your hand from the door and chivvying you to the back of the car instead.

“You’re coming with us?” You asked, your heart aching that little bit more. You didn’t want to spend another minute in her presence and yet she would now probably spend the rest of the week until your mum and sister came back.

“Ye—”

“No she’s not.” Harry walked out of the restaurant and over to the car, standing in between the both of you but a little more towards you.

“Babe? What do you mean?” Natalia asked, a little bit shocked at his tone with her.

“Firstly dont babe me. Secondly, get your hand off my car. Thirdly, don’t ever come near me or my sister ever again.” Harry ordered angrily. You’d never seen him this angry before. You stood behind him, afraid of what was about to go down.

“What has she said to you, because—”

“She’s my sister and she’s got a name. Y/N didn’t tell me anything. Lemon Puffs, however, has eyes and ears everywhere and it’s amazing the stories you hear when you’re stood at the cashier or next to someone at the urinals.” Harry accused Natalia and she went hot red in the face, embarrassed that this conversation was actually happening.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“No? Maybe this will jog your memory. ‘I think you aren’t the kind of person anyone wants around, including Harry.’” Harry raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms over his chest confrontationally. Guarding and protecting you. You felt safe.

“Wha— You think I would say that?” Natalia asked, pretending to be offended by the accusation.

“I don’t know, let’s ask Y/N shall we? Y/N, did Natalia say that to you?” Harry asked, turning to look at you with hope in his eyes, but also sorriness for everything that’s happened. You could see it all behind his eyes and you wanted to squeeze him tight to accept his apology, because you loved him and you needed him.

“Y-yes.” You answered, looking down so you didn’t have to make eye contact with Natalia.

“Harry you can’t possibly believe her.” Natalia laughed, but there was heavy insecurity in her tone.

“I trust her more than anyone. More than you. I trust Y/N with my life.” Harry back answered, taking no more bullshit from his ex-girlfriend. “We’re done Natalia. Okay? I don’t want to see you ever again. What you’ve said and done to my sister is unforgivable and I don’t want someone like you in my life.”

“You were a dick too.” You added quietly behind him and he just turned round to smile and wink at you.

“So what? That’s it?” Natalia asked, dumbfounded.

“Bye Natalia.” Harry walked around to the drivers seat and you to the passenger side. He stopped before opening the door though, wanting to say one last thing. “The bill was split in half by the way. Paul’s just inside waiting for you to pay.”

With that, you both got in the car, laughing at Natalia’s reaction and just everything. Apologises were made and promises of no relationships until you two had built back up yours were sworn. It would take time, but Harry was willing to prove that he was a good brother and you were always going to be someone he wanted around.

#harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #finelinevogue harry styles #finelinevogue #harry oneshot #harry styles concept #harry blurb #harry styles x sister!reader #harry styles sister concept #harry styles sister #harry styles masterlist #finelinevogue blurbs #ask finelinevogue #ask harry styles #anon response #anon #harry styles angst #harry styles sister angst blurb

[collecting-stories]

Saving Grace - JJ Maybank

A/N: A You Are Ok drabble set ten years in the future 

You Are Ok Masterlist | Outer Banks Masterlist

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

The Maybank house had sat empty on the cut for almost five years until JJ’s dad was released from prison. You and JJ had been down in Florida at the time, moved out of his cousin’s trailer and living in an apartment in the everglades. Talking about going home but unsure what the OBX had to offer at that point. It was barely two weeks after that when you both flew home, Luke Maybank had overdosed and the house was empty once again.  

It stayed empty while the two of you gutted the entire place and refurbished it. While JJ and you stayed at the Chateau or Kiara’s place, while you found a job and found out you were pregnant, while JJ got a job for himself in the area and went back down to the everglades to empty out the apartment.  

JJ laid the tile in the bathroom himself and fixed the plumbing. You painted the inside and outside of the house, planted a garden, bought a chicken coop. You and JJ moved in to the house and just like that you were back in the OBX.  

-

You sat outside on the porch, drinking a cup of coffee despite the hour nearing eight o’clock at night. The baby monitor was sitting beside you, a soft gurgling coming from the receiver. You were waiting for the familiar sight of JJ’s truck pulling down the long driveway in the dusk. The headlights were already on, flashing on you for a moment as he parked and then cut off, the engine dying.  

“Hey, what’re you doing out here?” He asked, climbing out of the front seat of the car and bringing a bag of chinese food with him.  

“Waiting for you to bring me egg rolls?” You joke, before turning serious, “I saw my dad this morning, at the grocery store.”

“Did he see you?”  

“Yeah...it was, really weird?” You suggested, reaching for the bag. JJ shook his head and held the bag away from you, a silent ‘I’ve got it’ as he leaned in and gave you a kiss. You wrinkled your nose at the familiar smell of fish as you pulled away, “how was work?”

“Alright...” he shrugged, “what did your dad say?”  

“That he wants me to come to church on Sunday.” You replied, following him inside.  

“You wanna go?” It was a question but the way he asked you knew that he already knew the answer.

“I mean...I’m not gonna like, start going to church with them every week and ya know, go back to how I was but...it might be nice. I do miss my family and, I want to have boundaries but maybe they don’t have to be like, huge ten-year silence boundaries where we never speak. I do want Willow to know her cousins; I think. What do you wanna do?” You asked, passing plates across the counter to him.  

A tinny half cry sounded from the monitor on the table and you both turned to look over at it, waiting for a crescendo of cries that you’d grown used to in the last four months. When silence settled back in, you both seemed to exhale in relief. You wanted to eat and finish this conversation before JJ ultimately showered and fell asleep until Willow’s usual one a.m. wake up.  

“Whatever you want.” He replied, never submitting to making the decision for you when you wanted him to. “Not exactly like your family’s a big of me.”

“Can’t imagine why,” you bumped his hip with your own, kissing his cheek. “Not like you totally corrupted their youngest daughter or anything.”

“Oh no, do not blame that on me.”

“I didn’t run away to marry myself.”

“If you go...” JJ posed, turning to follow you to the table, “do you want to go alone?”

-

You stood frozen in place, holding a box of cereal in your hand as you stared across the small expanse of Heyward’s shop, your dad there by the fresh produce, comparing two different apples with each other. The Outer Banks was a small island but you ran in very different circles and, in the three years that you’d been home, had avoided seeing your parents. Or anyone in your family.  

You’d driven passed the baptist church, a sign boasting a new assistant pastor, one of your brothers, when you’d first moved back but hadn’t actually seen anyone. The possibility of seeing them again had been a long debate between you and JJ when you’d finally decided to leave Florida for North Carolina. It had been hard in the very beginning, missing birthdays and anniversaries and new babies, but over time the ache had dulled and you had shifted your attention away from what you were missing and focused on working through the things you could heal in yourself.  

Now you were frozen. If you left your basket of groceries now you could make a beeline for the door and be out before he saw you. But then the bell above the door rattled as a customer came in and the baby swaddled against your chest started to fuss. Before you could attempt to placate her, your dad was looking over. For a moment you were certain he didn’t recognize you. Ten years was a long time. But then his mouth quirked into a frown and he set down the apples he was holding.  

“Ace?” He questioned, the old nickname feeling foreign to you. It’d probably been ten years since anyone called you that.  

“Hey, dad.” You nodded your head at him across the small store. You felt like tacking on a ‘surprise’ for good measure. ‘Surprise, I’m in the OBX, surprise, I got a kid...’

“When did you uh, when did you come home?” He moved across the store to be near you though he refrained from reaching out for a hug. You wondered if a decade had been just as hard on him as it had on you. Cathartic and healthy and freeing but hard. He seemed more mellow, you thought that before he might’ve pulled out a bible and started admonishing you.  

“JJ and I moved back three years ago,” you admitted, slipping his name into the conversation as if to prove a point. “He got a job on a fishing rig.”  

“Will you...would you come to church? We could have lunch afterward. Or you could just be there?” He offered. Ten years hadn’t changed his beliefs at all but it had made him miss you. Not knowing where you were or what you were doing felt like an ache in his chest that never went away. The anger had subsided to sadness and guilt.  

-

Seeing your dad had been startling enough and you had almost wished, while you were standing there in Heyward’s, that JJ could’ve been with you. Though, you weren’t entirely sure that would’ve helped anything in the long run.

“I think my mom would probably be nicer to me if I brought Wills but maybe, I mean, my dad already saw her. He didn’t ask about her but maybe...” you groaned, burying your face in your hands for a moment as you tried to gather your thoughts. “Why didn’t we stay in Florida?”

“Cause we both spent seven years talking about how much we wanted to come back to the OBX...and my dad-”

“Jay.”

“Look. My dad was an asshole okay, he was a fucking nightmare but you know better than anyone that not getting to see him at the end...that was the worst call I’ve ever gotten in my life. Knowing Ricky was the only one up here and that he was alone. You should do whatever you want to do and I’ll be there, right next to you, just like I’ve been for ten years, but I don’t want you to have any regrets.” JJ replied, honestly.  

You nodded, looking down at the plate of food and pushing your fried rice around. You knew that JJ was still hurting, that gutting a house didn’t take away all the memories that were trapped inside. “God I hate when you’re right.” You sighed.  

“Don’t let your dad hear you talk like that.” He teased just as the monitor went off again, this time for real. You leaned against the back of the chair and groaned as JJ stood up. “I got it.”

“No, it’s okay, I’ll get her.” You stood too. “You need a shower, and sleep.”  

“I haven’t seen her all day,” JJ pointed out, following you down the short hallway to the bedroom that used to be his. It was painted in yellows and oranges now, with a crib and a rocking chair and baby books. A sunset mural painted on the wall from Kiara’s girlfriend and a chandelier of stars from Sarah.  

“What are you gonna do, take her in the shower with you?” You joked, lifting the fussing baby up out of her crib, “hey bubba, what’s the matter?”

“You have to feed her right? So feed her in the bathroom.”

“Oh sure, Jay, that’s super comfortable for me. I would love to feed her while I sit on the toilet.” You grumbled, already knowing that you would probably, definitely end up caving to him and doing exactly that.  

“I’ll put dinner away and do the dishes.” He promised, “and I’ll punch you’ll dad if he says anything to piss you off.”

#jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank fanfic #jj maybank x fanfiction #jj maybank fic #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x you #outer banks imagine #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks fanfic #outer banks fic #obx fanfic #obx fanfiction #obx fic #obx imagine #collecting stories imagine #you are ok series

[ray-ray-writings]

Better Than a Dedicated Chicken-Technoblade

One of you lovelies requested a Part two to A Dedicated Pig… So I hope I did it justice!! I hope you enjoy!! 

Part One! Part Three! Part Four

  my masterlist here

This is a Techno x gn reader in the Dreamsmp! This will not 100% follow what actually happened at the festival

Y/N gets to see Techno again thanks to the upcoming festival in Manberg.

Y/N’s POV

“A festival?” I questioned the young boy that stood in front of me. Tubbo grinned and nodded motioning to the invite in my hands. “Yeah! Schlatt thought that it would be a great idea! He said it would be a celebration of Manberg and democracy.” I subtly rolled my eyes at that, but nodded with a sweet smile at the boy. “There’s going to be games, food, and drinking for those of age. Niki is going to help cater, as I’m sure you’ll find out soon since she’s going to need extra supplies.” I hummed and nodded once more. “Sounds fun Tubbo” “So you’ll come?” Tubbo asked excitedly. I giggled and ruffled the young boy’s hair, “Of course Tubbs. I can’t wait.” Tubbo let out an excited squeal before wishing me goodbye and running away. 

I chuckled at his excitement before turning and closing the door. I pinned the invite to my food chest so that I would see it and not forget. I spent the next few hours taking care of things around the farm. If what Tubbo said is true, I would need to be prepared to feed basically the entire server. As I collected the eggs from the chickens, a knock sounded on my front door. I was slightly confused, but figured it was Niki coming to inform me about catering the festival. I was wrong. 

“Technoblade” I uttered in surprise, “What are you doing here?” I questioned. Techno gave me a half shrug, “I wanted to see you…” He answered, entering my barn as I moved out of the doorway “Also Tubbo said he had something for me and asked me to come to Manberg to pick it up.” He answered, waving his hand around. In his hand was an invitation identical to mine. “You got invited to the festival,” I observed. I was a little surprised seeing as he was currently helping Wilbur and Tommy. “Yep,” He said, popping the p, “And I see you were as well.” “Well I would hope so considering I’m a citizen of Manberg”

Techno chuckled at my answer, shaking his head at my words, “Oh yeah, forgot about that part.” The two of us chuckled together about his momentary forgetfulness. “I was just collecting eggs from the chickens, do you want to help?” I asked, motioning to where the chickens were housed. “Sure,” Techno answered. I gave him a smile before turning on my heel and walking toward the chicken coup. 

“Girls, this is Techno,” I stated out loud as I introduced the chickens to my friend, “He’s here to help. Be nice.” I demanded, giving them a playful glare. The chickens glanced at me, clucked, and went back to what they were doing. Techno let out a chuckle at my words. I couldn’t help but blush at the sound, I guess it would be kind of silly, hearing me talk to the chickens. I cleared my throat before moving back toward where my basket sat, half-full of eggs. 

“So basically, for the most part, the girls will let you take their eggs without a fight. They’ll get up and reveal the egg to you so you can grab it. If she doesn’t, just reach under her and grab it. They may cluck angrily, but they’re all cluck and no peck.” I explained, picking up an egg from a nest. Techno gave me a dutiful nod before turning to a nest and pulling out an egg. 

The two of us worked in a comfortable silence, broken occasionally by an angry cluck causing both of us to chuckle. More than once I felt Techno’s stare on my figure. I would look up and meet his eyes and he would then immediately look away and go back to picking up eggs, a subtle blush on his cheeks. It made me smile and blush as well. 

As I placed the last egg in my basket, Techno cleared his throat, “Um. There’s something I want to ask you.” He stated nervously. I set the basket in a safe location before meeting Techno’s eyes, “What’s up?” I questioned, placing my hands on my hips. “I was wondering… If maybe… You’d want to go to the festival?” He asked. I furrowed my brow in confusion, “Yeah I want to go to the festival! Tubbo said Niki was catering so I’ll be there to help with that…” I answered, very confused at his question. Techno let out a little laugh confusing me even more, “No… Um… I meant do you want to go to the festival… with me.” He explained. “Oh,” I squeaked, “Like a date?” I pondered. “Like a date,” Techno confirmed, nerves lacing his voice. I didn’t have to think about it at all, “I would love that!” I exclaimed with a grin. 

Techno’s face instantly lit up as a grin overtook his face. “Oh, awesome! I didn’t expect you to say yes,” He admitted. I giggled at his confession, “Well I did and now I can’t wait.” I beamed. “Okay, so the day of, do you want me to pick you up or just meet you there?” He asked. I let out a hum, thinking for a moment, “We can just meet there because I’ll have to help Niki set up and then we can go from there? So I’ll just meet you at the food table at, say, 3?” Techno gave me a smile and nod, “Sounds good” I grinned at the pink haired man’s words. 

Suddenly, a knock sounded at my door once more, breaking us out of our bubble. “Who’s that?” Techno questioned. I picked up the egg basket and carried it out of the room as the two of us made our way to the front door, “Not sure. But it’s probably Niki.” I informed the pink haired man. He let out a hum in acknowledgement. “Okay. I’m going to stay here until you’re sure though. I’m still not really supposed to be here.” I let out a giggle, but nodded. 

I set the eggs down in my kitchen before moving to the door. I swung it open and sure enough, there stood my best friend. “Hey Niki!” I greeted loudly, moving out of the way, letting her in the barn. “Hey Y/N” Niki greeted me back, a little bit confused by my loud tone. Her unspoken question was answered when Technoblade walked out from his hiding spot. “Hi Niki.” He also greeted the girl. “Oh! Hello Techno.” She greeted in surprise. I had told Niki all about how I had met Techno. She was a little weary at first, but once I told her more, she became supportive. 

“It was great seeing you guys but I’ve got to get back to Pogtopia as I’m really not supposed to still be here.” Techno confessed, “I’ll see you guys at the festival though, yeah?” Techno asked, staring straight at me. I gave the man a soft smile and gentle nod, “Yeah. I’ll--We’ll see you there” I stated, quickly correcting myself. “Yeah, we’ll see you there.” Niki teased, stressing the we in the sentence. Techno gave us both a nod before he left out my front door. It was silent between me and my best friend for a moment before Niki broke it, “So the festival huh?” 

*Time skip to the festival*

I let out a sigh as I set down the last crate of cookies on the food table. I had helped Niki bake and bring all of the food items that Schlatt had requested at the festival and now it was time to sit back and enjoy the festival. “Hey,” a familiar voice greeted me from behind. I turned around and smiled at the man. “Hey,” I greeted Techno back. “You look really nice,” He complimented, rubbing the back of his head, a faint blush on his cheeks. My cheeks also flushed as my hands smoothed down my outfit. I had purposefully worn the outfit I felt the cutest in with hopes of impressing Techno on our date. “Thank you. You do too.” I complimented back. Techno gave me a soft smile before extending his hand to me, “Shall we,” I giggled and took his hand, “We shall,” 

The two of us walked around for a bit, talking about life, munching on snacks, and just looking at the pretty decorations. Our conversation was cut off by a voice announcing that the dunk tank was now open for business. “You want to go dunk some nerds?” Techno questioned, looking over to the minigame. I giggled at his phrasing, but nodded in agreement. 

Ponk sat in the tank first. It took a few tries, but he was eventually dunked causing him to scowl. Niki was next. I laughed loudly as she brought herself up for air. Niki playfully threatened to hug me if I didn’t shut my mouth. Her words simply made me giggle even more. Then to my surprise, Techno volunteered to sit in the tank. Everyone missed their shots. I couldn’t tell if it was because they had bad aim or were just too nervous to dunk the Blood God. I, however, was not scared of the Blood God’s wrath. 

There was a huge gasp as I hit the button, submerging the pink haired man. Techno slowly rose up from the water. His head lifted from looking down at the water as he made eye contact with me. “Oh you’re so going to regret that,” Techno claimed with a playful glare. “Bring it,” I challenged, not at all threatened by the man’s demeanor. That being said, I had no idea Techno had a trident with channeling on it. So I was in for a surprise when the man suddenly appeared in front of me, staring me down. 

Everyone was silent at the interaction. Most probably thought they were about to see me lose a cannon life. But I knew better. “Don’t you dare.” I muttered to the pink haired man. Techno said nothing, he only gave me a grin. In one swift motion, Techno had wrapped me up in his arms, swinging me around. “Hey!” I cried out, “You jerk! Now I’m all wet!” I claimed with a pout. Techno let me go, the grin still not leaving his face. “You asked for it. You told me to bring it. Consider it brought.” I rolled my eyes, but laughed. “You know what. You’re right.” “I always am.” 

After drying off, we moved on to our next minigame, boxing. I had opted out of actually participating, but that didn’t stop me from standing around the ring cheering on the others. Tubbo surprisingly won against Quackity. Schlatt not so surprisingly won by cheating against Fundy. Techno, once again, surprising everyone by participating in the games. Tech was disappointed when he found out that they would be fighting without weapons. He took a moment to collect himself away from everyone before he came back to fight Fundy. We all watched in amazement as Fundy went down in just three simple hits. 

I giggled as Techno found his way back to my side, gloating about his victory. As he got closer, I noticed dark red circles radiating from the man’s body, causing me to giggle harder. “Quite the amazing amount of strength you got there.” I mumbled to the man, reaching up and grabbing his hand, intertwining our fingers. Techno looked down at me with a raised eyebrow, “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” The grin that plastered itself on his face told me otherwise. I rolled my eyes with a soft smile before leaning up on my toes and planting a cheek to Techno’s cheek. “You’re lucky you’re cute” 

For the next half hour or so, everyone hung around the snack table. There was lots of laughter, snacking, story swapping, and drinking as the whole nation gathered together. The sun began to set, causing Schlatt to announce it was time for the speeches. Schlatt gave his speech first, thanking everyone for coming and how great the nation was now that he was in charge. Quackity’s speech followed along the same lines. As the moon rose, Tubbo took center stage. He delivered a very heartfelt speech about democracy and how we could build Manberg to be bigger and better. 

“And now, Technoblade has prepared something special to show us.” Tubbo said, motioning down toward where the two of us sat. I furrowed my brow in confusion. He didn’t tell me he had something special. Techno squeezed my hand in a silent form of comfort, before letting go of my hand. Techno took out a crossbow, but it wasn’t a normal crossbow. In place of the arrow that usually sat in the nock of the bow, a firework took its place. Techno aimed the crossbow to the sky and shot it. 

Loud gasps and murmurs fell over the crowd as all eyes were trained on the rocket hurtling toward the sky. An explosion sounded as bright bursts of colorful light lit up the sky. I hadn’t seen fireworks in so long. I almost forgot how beautiful they were. One after another, Techno shot them into the sky. Beautiful and unique patterns I had never seen before filled the night sky. I really wish Tommy and Wilbur could have seen this. 

“Last one,” Techno called as he loaded up the final firework into his crossbow. A disappointed groan escaped the lips of many, including my own, SMP members. The rocket flew through the sky before exploding. But instead of a pattern like the rest of the fireworks had been, this one was words. My jaw dropped as I read the words that were written in the sky. “Y/N. Will you be my partner?” My head snapped to find a nervous Technoblade already looking at me. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since the moment we met. You weren’t afraid of me and you gave me a chance to show you the real me. I’ve had an amazing and fun time tonight and I would love for you to be my partner.” Techno admitted softly. 

I couldn’t help myself. I lurched forward, wrapped my arms around Techno’s neck, and brought him down into a soft kiss. Around us, the members of the server burst into applause. I pulled back ever so slightly from the kiss, “In case you couldn’t tell. I had an amazing and fun time tonight too and I really, really like you.” I whispered gently. Techno grinned at my confession, “Does that mean it’s a yes?” “I think you know it is.” “I think I know so too.” Techno proceeded to close the small gap between us, kissing me once again. 

“You know?” I said, after pulling back again, “Between sneaking into Manberg to see me, collecting eggs with me, cheating in minigames to impress me, and using fireworks to ask me out… I guess I could call you one dedicated pig.” I teased my new boyfriend. Techno playfully scoffed at my words and rolled his eyes, “You know what? It’s better than being a dedicated chicken trying to kill you,” he teased back, poking at my sides causing me to giggle. “You got me there… You got me there” 

There you have it! I hope you enjoyed! If so be sure to leave a like! Maybe even a reply or reblog telling me what your favorite part was!! Until next time!

#mcyt #mcyt imagine #mcyt one shot #mcyt x reader #gender neutral #technoblade imagine #technoblade #technoblade x reader #dream #dreamsmp #dream smp #dreamsmp imagine #dream smp imagine #imagine #better than a dedicated chicken #ray ray writing #a dedicated pig part two

[tsukidrama]

would you write about reader being sad about losing her little brothers and Annie comforting her about it?

scattered like seeds

off the beaten path (a trnt side story)

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢѕ: discussion of grief / dead little kids

setting: the cottage, sometime after chapter 2

ao3 | the road not taken | cottagecanon

← previous | next →

author’s note: accidentally hurt myself real bad with this one... definitely going to be writing a happy fic about the little brothers in the future. poor reader gotta be equally as repressed as Annie to explain how much that bitch compartmentalizes

word count: 1.9k

Chickens cluck at your ankles, bobbing their heads up and down as they run around the fenced-in enclosure You throw another handful of feed amongst the grass. Predictably, a swarm of chickens mobs the area immediately. 

It brings a nostalgic smile to your face. Animals are what you’d been missing – not only does it give you something to focus on, but it reminds you of better days. You think back to your childhood when you’d help out around your grandparents’ farm. 

You’d fed the chickens back then, too. Another handful of seeds scatters amongst the chickens. 

“They’re so loud…” Annie mutters distastefully. The birds don’t even come up to her knees, but she flinches every time one of them moves a little too quickly. She startles at the slightest bawk or the flap of a wing. 

You suppress a giggle. “Well yeah, they’re chickens. But it’s too quiet out here anyway.” 

She crosse her arms and huffs. “Hmm,” she grumbles, “That’s why I liked it.” 

More than anything, her moodiness is endearing. “You’ll get used to them soon enough,” you assure her playfully. 

Another grimace. “Do I want that, though?” 

The animals are one thing that you’re not going to budge on. Alright, you’re out in bumfuck nowhere. Her dad lives here too? Fine. But you ARE taking care of farm animals and you are NOT going to eat them. They will be your pets and it starts with the chickens. 

But in the spirit of keeping the peace, you decide to appeal to her ethos instead. 

“It reminds me of home,” you say simply. 

It works like a charm. 

Finally, Annie smiles. The grumpiness fades away as her face softens. “Yeah?”

“Yeah…”

“I’ll get used to it,” she confirms, nodding, before she sucks air in through her teeth again, “but right now, I really want to go back inside. Are we almost done?”

You can’t pinpoint whether it’s her words, or the intonation in which she says them, or maybe the all-too-familiar way she cringes away from the chickens, that triggers your deja vu. But you’ve seen this before… In your mind’s eye, you can see a little boy saying those exact same words. 

“I wanna go back inside,” he’d pouted, “Are we almost done?” 

You don’t remember what you had said in return. Had he usually come with you to feed the chickens, or was that time special? You can only come up blank. What’s more distressing than anything is the fact that the memories seem to be slipping away. You stop what you’re doing and focus entirely on retrieving the memory. 

In the process, you wall yourself up without even realizing it. Annie is still talking to you, you’re watching her mouth move, but you have no clue what she’s saying. Her words go in one ear and out the other. 

“Don’t let them peck me!” Annie cries out, shrieking. 

It’s the only sentence that cuts through the haze, and it unintentionally triggers the rest of the memory. Something inside of you freezes up as you’re is flooded by recollection. 

You’re nine years old again, carrying a basket of eggs you’d gathered for your grandparents. Two little boys are inside the coops with you shrieking and running in circles. 

“Don’t let them peck me!” your youngest brother shouts. He screams and slaps at the birds helplessly in an attempt to shoo them. His grubby little hands don’t actually hit the chickens, but he effectively scares them away. “Noooo! Save me!” 

You hold back giggles as you lean down with your arms outstretched. “Jump up here. I’ve got you, Joey.” 

He’s small enough that he can still fit on your hip if you hoist him up and young enough that he still clings to you without resentment. He squeals as he holds his feet out of reach. 

Another boy a few years older than the first guffaws across the coop. He laughs up until it causes the swarm of chickens to turn on him. 

He shrieks. “Nooo! Don’t let them come over hewe, I’m out of food! My bucket’s empty.” As they bump into him he lets out a scream.  

“Run away!” shouts Joseph from your arms. “Run, Sam!”

“Come here!” you encourage, reaching out your one free hand. Samuel cackles joyfully as he runs along the fence of the coop. He succeeds in outrunning the chickens until he reaches where you and the little one are standing. 

He manages to dash behind you. Immediately he clutches your waist, trying to push you in front of him as a human shield. You hold back your own giggles as you let him. The chickens swarm harmlessly below, doing nothing more than bumping against your legs. Your feet are pecked, but they’re harmless taps of exploration, not aggression.  

Both of the boys giggle as the lack of real danger becomes clear. You smile warmly and nuzzle into Joseph’s head. 

Since your hands are full, Samuel opens the gate of the chicken coop while you block the chicken with your leg. Even back then you were the one responsible for making sure none of the birds escape from the open door. 

You set Joey down as you re-fasten the latch on the coop door. He goes to rattle at the fence, laughing when the chickens curiously gobble through the chainlink in return. 

Suddenly, he yanks his hand away with a shout. “Ow!” he shouts, “It bit me!” 

Again Sam laughs at him. 

“Hey!” you protest. Not really even to fuss at him, but to stop Joseph from getting too upset about it.

It’s too late, though, and there are already tears welling up in his eyes. 

The three-year-old stomps his foot in defiance and sticks out his tongue. You hand off the basket of eggs to the older of the boys as you kneel down. 

“You’re alright, see?” you remind Joseph. You gently take hold of his chubby little wrist and kiss his finger to make it feel better. He smiles despite the fat tears still rolling down his cheeks. 

“Sowwy Joey,” Samuel adds bashfully after a few seconds. 

The littlest one sniffles, but moves on quickly. “S’okay Sam… but can I be the one who carries the basket?”

You giggle at how quick his turnaround was, and at how the frown is wiped from his face as the basket is handed over. 

Joseph holds your hand without you even having to ask. Sam, on the other hand, pretends to ignore you when you’d reached for his. However, after you clear your throat he gives in. 

You remember the smile on your face and the joy you felt in that moment when the three of you walked back up to the house together hand in hand. 

How could you ever have forgotten? Had you really forgotten, though? Or had you just buried it so deeply that you didn’t even realize those memories had floated away from you? Immediately, you clutch your chest as an old and familiar ache comes out. 

Annie notices your reaction and approaches you gently. “Uh, are you okay?” she asks, looking both nervous and confused. 

For a moment you stay completely frozen up. Tears well in your eyes and flow down your cheeks, seemingly out of nowhere. For a second you genuinely don’t know how to react. All you can manage to do is stare at Annie hopelessly and terrified. 

“Hey…” she mutters. All at once the seriousness of the situation seems to hit her. She crosses the distance between you to put her hands on your shoulders. Instead of forcing you to make eye contact, she just snakes arounds you to offer a quiet comfort. You try to move but you can only stumble, so you lean against the outer fence of the coop. 

Now you stare down at the chickens again. You’re finally able to get a few strained words out. “Being out here with them makes me think about my brothers.” 

Annie’s face falls. She can recall the amount of times that you’ve talked about them on one hand easily, and most of those times she had been encased in Titan crystal. At the time, it had seemed like a blessing to be able to sit there passively listening. She had no clue what to say back then, because after all, what do you say about somebody’s dead siblings? 

Now that she was seeing you upset about it for the first time, it felt much more like a curse. She regrets not thinking about it more, or not coming up with a plan to deal with your reaction. Her hands shake as her embrace on you tightens. 

“I’m sorry – I didn’t realize,” she stutters, and presses her forehead to your shoulder. “I feel stupid. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

You shake your head. “It’s not really your fault, and it’s not a bad thing, either,” you insist, although there’s a notice crack in your voice, “uh, I think. It’s lot, you know? I just — I don’t know. I miss them.”

Once again, you start to cry as more memories resurface. Little but significant things like the smell of the top of Joey’s head, or the way Sam used to hold your hand far too tightly (not that you’d ever complained). The sound of their voices, their favorite holidays and times of year. 

“Oh shit,” Annie mutters, starting to sweat a little bit, “hey, come here.” She pulls you closer to her and wipes your tears with the back of her hand. 

You cry for a little while longer while she holds you, though you’re tying to suck it up the whole time. There’s no rush or pressure, but you’re embarrassed of how it came out of nowhere. Maybe you just want to be perceived as being more put-together than you actually are. 

“Do you think it would help to talk about it?” Annie asks after a few minutes. She seems hesitant to bring the topic up again. 

You shrug as you consider it, but in the end you decide against it. The memory was top unexpected, and honestly, it hurts too much to process right now. You’re starting to calm down at long last. 

How was it that even just by remembering, it felt like someone had reached into your chest and squeezed your heart into a mangled pulp? 

Eventually, you shake your head. “For now do you think you could just… help me feed them?” 

Annie nods earnestly, all hints of hesitancy and sarcasm gone. She lets go of your shoulders and takes the bucket from your hands. 

And though she doesn’t look particularly excited about it, she even reaches into the bucket to scatter a handful of feed amidst the birds. She isn’t looking, and throws it directly on top of one of the hens, who screams like it’s being murdered and dashes into the covered coop. 

It’s enough to break the heaviness of the moment. You laugh, much to the blonde’s embarrasmmnet. Pink floods her cheeks and she pushes the bucket back towards you. 

“Your turn,” she encourages, but you know her well enough to know that with this kind of blush, what she actually means is: “Take it away now.” 

So you take it back as she loops her arm in yours. Annie leans her head on your shoulder while you scatter another handful of seeds. This time, it doesn’t land on a chicken. 

You watch them bob around, pecking and clucking between the grass. The throbbing in your chest dulls to a nostalgic ache. Finally, you let your guard down enough to let yourself rest. 

#this is also the chapter where they first get chickens. man i fucking love chickens #off the beaten path #the road not taken #trnt annie #annie-isms #cottagecanon #writing for my wives #annie leonhardt #annie leonhardt x reader #annie leonhardt imagine #annie leonhardt x you #annie x you #annie leonhart #annie leonhart x reader #annie leonhart x you #annie leonhart imagine #snk x reader #aot x reader #snk #aot #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #annie leonhardt headcanons #annie leonhart headcanons #annie leonhardt drabble #annie leonhart drabble

[samwisethewitch]

Using Human Body Parts in Spells

Many witches believe that the human body is sacred. Whether they’re pantheists, animists, or somewhere in between, most magical practitioners agree that there is some sort of divine or magical essence contained in all living things, including our bodies. But if that’s the case, why do so many witches hesitate to use parts of the body in their craft?

Part of it is the “ick” factor. Western society is shaped by religious and cultural influences that tell us our bodies are unclean, gross, or even scary. In order to comfortably work with the energies of the human body in magic, we have to unlearn these cultural influences.

This post covers the uses of human effects (materials that come from the human body) in witchcraft and magic.

Why Use This Stuff, Anyway?

By far the most common use of human effects in magic is as a taglock. A taglock is an item from the person a spell is meant to affect — either a small piece of their person (such as hair or fingernail clippings), or a personal belonging that is energetically connected to them. A taglock acts as a sort of anchor, tying the energy of a spell to that specific person and providing a direct link between them and the magic. Think of it as an energetic targeting system. This brings faster, more powerful results.

The use of taglocks is connected to the concept of sympathetic magic, which states that what is done to a small part of a person or thing (including an image or effigy) affects the whole. This idea is as old as humans — in fact, some archaeologists believe that Paleolithic cave paintings of injured animals were a form of sympathetic magic meant to manifest successful hunts.

If you need a taglock for a spell and can’t or don’t want to use hair/fingernails/etc., use one of the person’s belongings instead. This can be a business card, a child’s stuffed animal, or a napkin they used at dinner — whatever you can get your hands on. If you can’t get a personal belonging, use a photograph of the person.

Aside from linking magic to a specific person, different human effects have their own magical correspondences (see below). Depending on your spell, it may make sense to include hair as a symbol of personal power and self-expression or menstrual blood as a symbol of releasing old energy. Most witches don’t think twice about using milk or eggs, which come from the bodies of cows and chickens, in their magic, so why shouldn’t we use things from our own bodies as well?

There is an unfortunate stigma around the use of human effects in magic. Things like blood and hair are unfairly associated with dark magic, and many witches avoid them for that reason. Like any other magical tool, human effects can be used in spells for good or ill. You could use a taglock to add power to a healing spell, for example, or put your own hair in a success spell to anchor that success to you. These items are a part of you — they are no more evil or scary than you are.

Ethics and Safety

We’ve already discussed the ethical implications of doing magic on other people. This is especially important to keep in mind when working with human effects, either your own or someone else’s, because you are working directly with that person’s energy. Sympathetic magic gets very up close and personal, so it’s important to take care.

Don’t do anything to the personal effect, whatever it is, that you wouldn’t do to the person themselves. (Yes, this still applies if you’re using one of their possessions, or even a photograph.) Be gentle and respectful. Don’t throw it around or be careless with it. Don’t set it on fire or cut it up unless you really know what you’re doing and really want to fuck with the person it came from.

There are certain safety precautions that need to be taken when working with human effects, especially bodily fluids. I’ll talk about safety protocol for blood magic in a future post, but for now just be aware of the danger of bloodborne diseases and other possible contaminants. Sexual fluids may carry STIs, for example. For this reason, you should always take care when handling someone else’s bodily fluids. Wear gloves and make sure you don’t have any exposed cuts or sores.

Hair and fingernails are the safest human effects because they contain dead cells, and thus the risk of contagion is low. They’re also usually a little easier to get a hold of, especially if you’re doing magic for another person. Hair and nail clippings are most witches’ go-to taglocks for these reasons.

And finally, do not ever, under any circumstances, eat, drink, or bathe in anything that came from another person’s body. Some older spells call for adding blood or some other bodily fluid to food, and some old initiation rituals require the initiate to drink wine containing a drop of blood from each group member. In modern times, we know that this is dangerous because it could potentially spread disease. Trust me when I say there is no good reason to ever consume someone else’s DNA. Just don’t.

Correspondences

Below are correspondences for some human effects that can fairly easily be incorporated into spells. I have also included substitutions, for those who truly just aren’t comfortable working with human effects. These substitutions may not be quite as powerful, but the symbolism is similar.

Note: The use of blood in magic is a huge topic with a rich history, so I have chosen to devote an entire post to it. Blood is not mentioned in this post, but I will be posting about it soon!

Correspondences of Human Effects

Hair is closely tied to a person’s essence and personal power, perhaps more so than any other effect besides blood. In many cultures, hair is never cut to avoid dispersing this power. (Think of the story of Samson in the Bible.) Hair is also associated with the head, mental abilities, and thoughts. Hair is one of the most powerful taglocks, and can also be used in spells related to strength, beauty, and mental clarity. Use a few of your own hairs to tie something up to bind it with your personal power.

Substitutes for Hair: clove (for empowerment), rosemary (for mental clarity), catnip (for beauty)

Saliva lends itself to many purposes because of its wide array of correspondences. On one hand it is associated with kissing and sex (think of the phrase “swapping spit” to describe kissing), but on the other it can be extremely offensive (spitting on someone is a very old and very strong insult). Saliva can also be substituted for any other bodily fluid.

Substitutes for Saliva: cardamom (for love and lust), vinegar (for cursing and insult)

Fingernails are, of course, linked to the hands and to a person’s ability to act. They’re also one of the easiest human effects to collect, which make them a good choice for a taglock. I usually see fingernails used in this context rather than to bring a certain energy to a spell.

Substitute for Fingernails: clove (to empower action)

Semen and Vaginal Arousal Fluid are, naturally, associated with sex. Both are associated with pure potential, fertility, and action, and can give your spell a heck of a power boost. Use sexual fluids in spells for growth and new beginnings. They are also useful in love magic — anoint a red candle with your sexual fluids to attract a lover.

Substitutes for Semen and Vaginal Arousal Fluid: penis or vulva shaped candle (for sex magic), rice (for fertility), rose (for love), cinnamon (for lust)

Urine is a traditional ingredient in the witch bottle, a powerful protective charm. It’s also found in both curses and love spells in American folk magic. Interestingly, it’s also used to break curses. One of my teachers practiced Appalachian folk magic, and she used to say that the most surefire way to get rid of any curse was to “piss on a brick.” (Red bricks are also associated with protection.) As you can see, urine is perhaps the most versatile bodily fluid when it comes to magical uses.

Substitutes for Urine: vinegar (for protection, cursing, and curse breaking), cardamom (for love and lust)

Human effects are a powerful way to add strength to any spell. Next time you’re conjuring healing, manifestation, or love, consider throwing some hair or fingernails in there. Let your body’s magic be a part of your craft.

Resources:

Utterly Wicked by Dorothy Morrison

Of Blood and Bones by Kate Freuler

“The Meaning of European Upper Paleolithic Rock Art” by Cristian Violatti on ancient.eu

A Green Witch’s Cupboard by Deborah J. Martin

#baby witch bootcamp #baby witch #witchcraft #witch #witchblr #sympathetic magic #magic #magick #taglock #blood magic #sex magic #wicca #wiccan #pagan #paganism #folk magic #my writing #mine #long post #spellwork #spell

[rothjuje]

I am exhausted, mentally and physically. I don’t think I have had 20 minutes to just sit and be in three days.

We had a morning play date on Friday, and then an afternoon park play date, and then I had a girls night (didn’t get home until 12:30 am). Saturday we ran errands, then a friend came over, then went to the park, then got ready for the move. Today was more of the same. We’ve gone to the park at least once every day.

I think I feel so fried from the social contact and Facebook marketplace. I’ve been freecycling most our smaller things and selling bigger items. But dealing with the people, especially the non-paying ones with all the questions, is a royal pain in the ass. Justin is begging me to bring it all to Goodwill but it’s so bad for the environment, so many things don’t find homes. I might have to though because getting rid of shit has turned into a part time job and I can’t take on anymore or I’ll snap.

As far as all the play dates and girls nights, I am having flashbacks from when I moved here. Everyone wanted to talk and hang out before I left and my phone was going off nonstop. And what happened? I spent time with my people, didn’t have time to pack my stuff, and it got dumped on my BFF.

Now it’s the same story but I have three kids, two of them being toddlers in their terrible twos.

Moving is the worst. THE WORST. I’m stress crying.

I can’t tell people I can’t talk or hang out. I’m leaving. Guilt. Oh the guilt. All the guilt.

Alyssa started crying at dinner, saying she loves our house and doesn’t want to move. We weren’t even talking about moving. But we can’t hide it from her even if we wanted to, we’ve gotten rid of 1/4 of our furniture and so many toys and all the stuff on the walls. Today was the first day it stopped feeling like home here.

Justin wanted to have some heart to heart about it and I just glared and said “if you pull another Florida we’re done.” I’m the worst right now. I don’t know how to be sane and normal and not mean for the next two months.

36 days until we list.

I had lots of happy things to say about all the progress we’ve made, how much I’ve bonded with Alyssa’s classmates’ parents and how I feel like we’re part of the same team and we all support one another and the pretty hamentashen I made (the trick to stop them from looking like lady parts is less filling) and a new filling I tried and the weather has been gorgeous and George is learning lots of new things and the chickens are laying tons of eggs but instead I just dumped out my stress. Whoops.

[luvdsc]

mark lee sucks at technology.

tap the heart if you have a big, fat, embarrassing crush on your best friend!

pairing :: lee mark x reader genre :: fluff / best friend + social influencer au word count :: 5,883 words warnings :: none playlist :: dumb stuff (lany) ⋆ feeling (coin) ⋆ so far so good (gabrielle aplin)��⋆ electric love (børns) ⋆ love by mistake (bad suns) author’s note :: i was debating if i should post it on his bday instead, but i decided to drop it earlier, so uh, happy (approx. one week early) bday to mister absolutely fully capable (except when it comes to tech stuff) !!!! thank you for blessing us with your god tier raps ♡ ↳ part of the not clickbait series.

In your required upper division business course aptly titled “Essential Marketing Strategies,” you had learned about a concept called personal brands. A personal brand is explained as the first impression a person wishes to perceive based on their own experiences, qualifications, and achievements. Your professor had told you and your classmates to pick three words to define your own brand. For instance, you chose to label yourself as charismatic, fun, and creative.

Your best friend’s brand would be awkward, endearing, and technologically challenged. 

Okay, so that is definitely more than three words, but who’s counting? You might as well tack on “Y/N’s big fat crush” at this rate because everyone and their mother knows that you carry a torch—or more accurately, a blazing wildfire that can easily be spotted from Pluto—for your best friend.

Well, to be more precise, you should probably say everyone, except Mark, knows. And that’s not for lack of trying either. You completely dropped the art of delicate subtlety months ago already. Maybe you should add “hopelessly oblivious” instead.

The rolling end credits to the sixth Harry Potter film are playing on the screen in front of you, signaling the nearing end of your magical movie marathon. You’re seated on the worn down couch in Mark and Donghyuck’s shared apartment, watching the former make his drink with the fancy, gently used Keurig newly settled on the scratched countertop. Johnny dropped it off a few days ago because he had splurged on a better coffee machine (“It even makes Instagram worthy whipped frappuccinos!”) and didn’t want his old, but still perfectly functioning caffeine provider going to waste.

“What’s wrong with this thing?” Mark slaps the side of the machine, and it starts to emit a low whirring noise. “Oh, that’s good, right? That sound is good, you think?”

His question is immediately answered by the sad squirt of hot water speckled with coffee grinds falling into his mug for a few seconds before the machine shuts off.

“What the hell?” he mutters angrily, carding his hand through his hair in frustration, and you finally decide to take pity on your best friend. Getting up from the comfy spot you know you sadly won’t be able to recreate perfectly again later, you stride over to where your best friend stands and flip open the top of the Keurig.

“Hyuck didn’t take out his used coffee pod,” you say, pulling out the incriminating evidence of your best friend’s roommate and disposing it in the trash can next to the refrigerator. “Where’s the espresso one you’re gonna use? Why didn’t you put that in?”

His jaw slackens, and he sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze and mumbling, “I thought I’d just open it later and pour it into my hot water.”

“Mark,” you start, placing your hands on his shoulders firmly and staring into his eyes with a serious look on your face. “Please know that I’m saying this in the most loving way possible, but you are an absolute idiot.”

You release your grip on his shoulders and grab the espresso pod dangling from his fingertips before slotting it into the Keurig. You remove the mug he placed underneath the spout and wash out the accidental coffee water before placing it back in its original position and pressing the start button on the machine. With a sigh, you lean against the side of the counter, glancing at your friend who looks like a child being scolded for stealing from the cookie jar.

“If you pour the pod into your mug, are you just going to chug all the loose coffee grinds, too?”

“... I didn’t think that far ahead.” His lips start to unintentionally form a tiny pout, and your eyes (and your heart, too) soften.

You’re very relieved that Donghyuck is off filming with your friend because he definitely would be making fun of your heart eyes that frequently make an appearance around a certain Mark Lee. Which you always deny. Because you certainly do not have a gigantic crush on your technologically inept best friend.

You glance over at him again and have to physically fight yourself to resist the urge to kiss his cute pout away. Okay, so maybe you harbor a very respectable, medium sized crush. But it's no big deal. It’s completely under control. Unless you’re counting the fact that your best friend is still unaware, and you’re running out of ideas to try and see if he likes you back before you actually shoot your shot. Then it’s very much not under control because you’re losing sleep over it and you don’t know what to do to be any more obvious without stating the, well, obvious.

“Well, now you know. If you forget, you can FaceTime me and I’ll give you instructions on how it works.” You pat his shoulder reassuringly before pausing. “Wait, you do know how to FaceTime, right?”

“Yes!” he exclaims, sulking even more before confessing in a quieter, defeated tone, “Hyuck showed me last month.”

Mark grabs his finished drink and follows behind you, settling back onto the couch next to you. The streaming service already has Deathly Hallows Part 1 in the queue and ready to go, and your best friend is ready to click play until he notices your attention being focused on the smaller screen in your hands. He wonders if you’re about to post another one of your popular cooking videos on that app that shares a name with the most iconic song of the 2000s (hint: the name of the song’s singer is made up of four letters and a dollar sign).

“Are you uploading one of your videos?” he implores before taking a sip of his drink with a satisfied smile. Somehow, it always tastes better when you make it, and he can’t figure out why for the life of him. When he went to Johnny’s place, his older friend uses the exact same pod and water ratio for his espresso, and yet, it’s never as good as yours.

“Nah, I’m ordering my grocery delivery before I forget. Do you want anything?” You select the option to load your usual grocery items into your cart before debating on whether or not you should splurge on buying several packages of those seasonal Pillsbury sugar cookies that only come in stock during certain holidays. It seems like such an insult to the entire premise of your Tiktok account based on baking and cooking, but you’re an absolute sucker for those soft pastries.

“Yeah, can you get me a Shin Ramyun ten pack? Hyuck ate the last one two days ago and didn’t tell me.”

“You sure you don’t want ten boxes again?” You decide to get those Pillsbury sugary delights, happily adding three boxes to your cart. Everybody has a weakness, and yours just so happens to be a premade one way ticket to diabetes. You’re here for a good, delicious time, not a long time.

“No! That was an accident!” He objects, flailing his hands around, before falling back against the couch cushions in defeat. “But Hyuck does all the online grocery shopping now.”

“Thank god. You guys finally have quality toilet paper again.”

The past month of bathroom occurrences was plagued with scratchy tissue that felt more like goddamn sandpaper from the horrible depths of hell. To be honest, you probably would have rather used actual sandpaper, given the choice. You even made sure not to drink too much water any time you came over, but today, you decided to splurge on a venti passion fruit iced tea with sweetener from that very popular franchise sporting a mermaid logo and fiscally cosmic name. To your pleasant surprise, your trip to the toilet this time was wonderfully padded with Charmin Ultra Soft, not that absolutely awful off brand one with the gross texture of a dried pinecone from inferno.

“Hey, that toilet paper was a good steal! It was a three for one deal,” Mark protests, and you narrow your eyes at him.

“Wow, I wonder why it was priced so low.” You deadpan, and Mark blanches, recalling all those restroom incidents that were rather rough. Literally.

“Anyway, do you think my viewers wanna see me make chocolate crinkle cookies or mochi doughnuts?” You bring up the two recipes you managed to perfect and add your own spin to on your phone, eyes scanning the ingredient lists.

“Both. And tell me when you’re making them, so I can come over and eat them.” He gives you a wide grin, and you let out a snort at that. His smile only grows as he says happily, “I love your job.”

“You only love it because you can freeload off of me,” you jest, but nevertheless begin to start to add all the ingredients for both recipes to your shopping cart. You always film cooking videos on Tuesdays, edit on Wednesdays, keep Thursdays free for last minute touch ups and emergencies, and post one every week on Fridays with other various random videos uploaded whenever in between. With that in mind, you schedule your upcoming grocery delivery for Monday.

“Hey, you need me. I’m the best taste tester.” He puffs up his chest proudly before hastily tacking on a more genuine reason. “And because I’d starve without you. I can’t live off of instant ramen and frozen chicken nuggets forever. Gordon Ramsay already confirmed my shitty cooking skills. I need you to survive.”

“Oh my god, when I uploaded those pics of your scrambled eggs on Twitter, I lost like a hundred followers in less than a minute.” You confirm the delivery and place your phone on the coffee table, picking up the opened bag of Cheeto puffs before settling back in your seat. “My cooking credibility was completely shot. I had to explain to my fans that I didn’t make those.”

“Yeah, but now everyone calls me Eggy Boi online!” he whines, and you laugh. You have to admit, it’s quite a funny play on the whole “edgy boi” terminology. You wonder if Mark will find it amusing if he discovers his roommate is the culprit behind his new online persona (He probably won’t, and you reckon Donghyuck enjoys living in a safe space where he doesn’t have to sleep with one eye open, so you stay quiet about it. You’ll use it as leverage some other time).

“Okay, Eggy Boi, come by on Tuesday because I’ll be baking in the afternoon,” you say casually, grabbing the remote control from your best friend and pressing play. 

You very narrowly avoid a green gummy bear to the face. It lands somewhere behind the couch, lost forever to the dust bunnies and other snacks that missed its target. You know for a fact that it’ll stay there until the boys decide to move to a new apartment. Mark grumbles at the miss, biting off the head of a red cherry flavored gummy bear perhaps a little harder than necessary.

“I hate you. But I’m still coming over next week because I want a doughnut.”

“No cookie?”

“... and a cookie. Maybe two.”

Wednesday comes faster than you expected, and you’re currently holed up in your apartment’s second bedroom—which you had transformed into a snazzy office space—completing the edits to your second video on mochi doughnuts. You already finished polishing the one about the cookies earlier, thank goodness. If you had to stare at your computer screen for another three hours, you would rather eat those pastries Mark tried to make two months ago, but had mistaken salt for sugar. Adding a cup of salt to any baked good is an extremely effective way to make anyone who tasted your best friend’s brownies experience a trip to the beach. Because they essentially just swallowed a mouthful of sand and ocean water. Because it’s salty as heck. Just like Mark was when you told him.

Speaking of your best friend, he’s currently puttering around in your kitchen doing god knows what. He knows better than to try another recipe and possibly blow up your number one moneymaker—your prized oven—in the process. Your heart nearly drops when your ears pick up the faint chopping sounds of a knife against your wooden cutting board. Is he going to try to temper chocolate again? He nearly burned through your entire stock of dark, milk, and white chocolate last time.

After much contemplation and deciding that you deserve a good procrastination break and a fully intact kitchen, you’re about to go out and see what he’s up to when Mark timidly appears in your doorway, clutching onto a white bowl of watermelon cubes with a fork tucked neatly in it. He shuffles in, dropping the snack on your desk before turning to walk out without a word, not wanting to disturb your work mode. 

Your heart warms up at the sight, and you speak up, a small smile slipping into your face. “What’s this for?”

“Knowing you, you probably haven’t eaten anything since breakfast.” He pauses in the doorway and adds on sheepishly, “And I can't cook anything, so this is what you get.”

Your heart swells tenfold, and your smile widens even more as you spear a piece of fruit with the fork and quickly pop it into your mouth. “Thanks, Marky.”

His cheeks flush with a pretty shade of carmine, and he fails to suppress the little giddy smile that appears on his face at your nickname for him. He walks out of your office, reddened cheeks still rising up higher than ever. “Y-Yeah, of course. No problem.”

By the time you finish adding the final few touches to your edited video, the bowl of watermelon has been picked clean. You save your video and transfer both of your completed projects to your phone, making a mental note to schedule their uploads and add them to your account’s posting queue later. Shoving your phone in the pocket of your sweats after ensuring the successful transfer of your videos, you pick up the empty dish and walk out towards the kitchen, the silver fork clinking against the side of the bowl with every step.

As you wash the dish and utensil, Mark wanders over from his spot on the couch, leaning forward and casually placing his chin on your shoulder. Almost instantaneously, you feel the heat rising to your cheeks as you briefly fantasize about your best friend wrapping his arms around your waist and how domestic and sweet the two of you would look, like one of those cheesy couples the two of you always made fun of.

“What’s up?” you ask, making a conscious effort to hold your voice steady and not waver over the fact that Mark is basically draped over you. After you place the dish on the drying rack, you turn around to face your best friend, sorely miscalculating the distance as mere inches separate your face from his now.

“I—” Puberty decides to make an ugly appearance in the form of an ill timed voice crack, and he internally curses as he takes a step back, willing the incoming blush to go away. Letting out a small cough, he tries again, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

“I, um, Jisung sent me some kind of dance video. He said it’s a challenge? I kinda don’t know what to do with it? Like do I make a new dance, record myself, and send it back? Actually, isn't it easier to just do a dance battle face to face?”

“Can I see the video?” You already have a good idea on what the video will be, but you want to confirm it. Mark fumbles with his phone, pulling up the video in his text messages. He angles the phone towards you for you to see, and you grab his hand, bringing the device a little closer to you for a better look and clicking play.

“Oh, it’s a Tiktok challenge! He’s doing the Say So dance!” you exclaim, recognizing the song almost immediately as your eyes follow the fluid dance moves, completely enthralled. “So a challenge isn’t going up against someone, like a battle. It’s just some kind of trend or concept that you try to copy yourself. You’re supposed to learn the same dance and record yourself for this one. I can show you some other challenges and help you practice and record this one tomorrow if you wanna drop by after work!”

“O-Oh, okay, sounds good.” Mark stumbles over his words, attempting to focus on what you’re saying and the dance Jisung is doing, but all he can think about is the way your body is pressed against his side, hand comfortably wrapped around his. He freezes up as the tips of his ears grow redder and redder with every passing second, and his face sports a similar color. He silently prays for the telltale crimson to go away by the time the dance is over.

When the video ends, you once again realize the close proximity between you and your best friend. Your face burns at this revelation, and you awkwardly take a step back. Clearing your throat, you hastily release Mark’s hand (He inaudibly lets out the breath he’s been holding in this entire time, yet he also already misses the way your hand felt grasping his).

“Uh, anyway, I’m gonna make a latte. Do you want a drink, too?” You walk towards the other side of your kitchen with Mark trailing behind you. You take out a floral, peachy colored mug from your cupboards before pausing and looking at your best friend. “Wait, do you remember how to use a Keurig?”

“Yes!” He says, slightly exasperated as he picks out his own cup from your cabinet. He always uses the same one—a cerulean blue mug with squiggles all over it—and all of your friends and guests know not to use it because it’s unofficially officially Mark’s mug (And perhaps, you did indeed buy it from that overpriced kitschy tableware shop down the street two years ago with your best friend in mind).

“Really?” You select the latte option and press start after you had already positioned the mug beneath the spout and inserted a green tea matcha pod. He finally relents, shoulders sagging and a defeated expression on his face.

“... No.”

You chuckle, taking the mug from him and carefully putting it on the counter. You grab the espresso pod you know he likes from the drawer below and place it next to the cup. “It’s okay, I’ll teach you again.”

Mark tries. He really does. He tries very hard to concentrate on memorizing the simple process, but he keeps getting distracted. His eyes are focused on the correct button to push before they start to trail up to your fingertips. And then, they go from your hand to your arm, then up to the elegant curve of your neck, and finally, to the way your lashes frame your pretty eyes and how the tip of your tongue sticks out slightly as you concentrate until all he can focus on is you, you, you.

Suddenly, in what feels like a blink of an eye, you’re done and handing him his finished drink, complete with a perfectly whipped milk foam on top. You ask him if he knows how to make it now, and all he can do is lie and nod with a barely convincing smile.

After all, how can Mark tell his best friend that the reason he never remembers is because you’re the biggest distraction?

Mark should be here in five minutes, according to his most recent text message. And in the text message below that, your friend had sent you a challenge. More specifically, it’s the one she completed with Donghyuck a few weeks ago. When you said you wanted bold suggestions on how to figure out if your best friend feels the same way about you as you do about him, you didn’t want one this bold. 

Yet, the video link to your friend’s “today I kissed my best friend” challenge along with a winky face from her is staring mockingly at you. While you aren’t one to back down from a challenge, the mere thought of kissing your best friend causes vast colonies of butterflies to erupt in your stomach and your ears to feel as if they have caught on fire. You’re already tongue tied with your head in the clouds, and he isn’t even here yet. How utterly fantastic.

However, your mother definitely did not raise a quitter, so you spring into action when you hear the faint jingling of a key being inserted into your apartment’s door (You had given Mark a copy of your key almost immediately after you had moved in). You move the pretty indoor fern given to you by Jaemin as a housewarming gift last year closer to the edge of your towering bookcase, leaning your phone against it. You quickly position the device to capture a good view of the couch area in your living room and press the record button, arranging a few of the leaves to hide as much of your phone as you possibly can without obstructing the lens.

You run full speed to your bedroom, letting out a sigh of relief when you’re safely inside and hear Mark finally unlocking the door successfully and shuffling in. When he calls out to you, you try to even out your breathing, walking out of your room with your tripod and laptop in hand.

“Hey,” you greet him in the most casual tone you can muster. You place the tripod down and sit before opening your laptop and setting it on the coffee table. “I thought we could watch a few challenges for fun before trying the Say So one. Have you watched Jisung’s videos before?”

“Um, well, no, not really,” he confesses sheepishly, taking a seat next to you on the couch, leg pressing against yours. He squints at the YouTube video you pulled up earlier before he had arrived, reading the title before clicking the space button to start it. “Savage Tiktok dance compilation part two?”

“Wait, hold up.” You pause the video and then turn to face him with an incredulous expression on your face. “You’ve never watched any of Jisung’s dance Tiktoks?”

“No… I don’t even have an account.” His cheeks are dusted with the lightest shade of pink as he quietly admits, “I watch all of yours though.”

Your eyes widen at his confession, face heating up as you stammer out, “O-Oh, well, I can help you make an account later to upload your video.”

“Sounds good.” There’s a few seconds of silence as you mull over his previous words before he speaks up again awkwardly, “Should I, uh, play the video?”

“Oh! Yes, right! Of course, hit play,” you laugh nervously, twisting and playing with the hair tie around your wrist. He starts the video again, and the two of you watch the compilation, slowly relaxing once more as you tap your fingers to the rhythm of the song and he bobs his head to the beat.

“Do I have to change outfits like that?” he questions a few minutes later, eyes growing round as he sees the girl on the screen switch between four different outfits throughout the dance. His closet basically consists of the same five black shirts that he stole from Jaehyun. Even if he did do an outfit swap, there would literally be no difference at all.

“You don’t have to,” you assure him, clicking the enter key to play the next video that’s recommended: another Tiktok dance challenge compilation. “All you have to do is copy the dance.”

Mark nods, taking a glance at the laptop screen before his hand shoots out and he pauses the video, leaning forward to take a closer look at the little recommended video title banner at the top. “Wait! What’s that one?”

He clicks on it, the new video now loading up. The two of you wait patiently for it to begin, waiting for the spinning disc to stop. But it doesn’t. In fact, the whole chrome page goes blank and then, the little pixelated Google Chrome dinosaur pops up on your monitor, announcing that you have no internet connection. Furrowing your eyebrows, you try to reload the page before trying to re-establish your laptop connection to your wifi. Unfortunately, you cannot find your appropriately named “drop it like it’s hotspot” wifi anywhere to connect to.

And that’s when it hits you. Your landlord had sent out a notice to the entire apartment complex last week about the electricity being powered down today from 4 to 6 p.m. for a maintenance check, and a quick glance at the digital clock on your laptop shows that it’s a little past four.

You groan, closing your laptop and flopping back against the couch cushions dramatically. Mark cocks his head, slightly confused, before he pokes you in the arm. “What’s wrong?”

“I completely forgot about the scheduled electricity shutdown for the entire building. We won’t have any wifi for the next two hours.” You pout, your bottom lip jutting out in the slightest, and Mark doesn’t think it’s fair that you get to be this cute and have this much of an effect on his racing heart rate.

“That’s okay, we can… play some board games?” he suggests offhandedly, pushing away the embarrassing thought and nudging your leg with his, and you smile before a sudden idea occurs to you. 

“Or we can still do some Tiktok challenges! What was the challenge you clicked on?” You quickly sit upright, turning to face your best friend, eyes sparkling in excitement. “I memorized a few of the dance ones already! Was it Renegade? I can teach you that one. Jisung showed me how to do it.”

“Um,” he starts, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. His eyes dart everywhere, except you, as he lets out a feigned cough. “It wasn’t a dance one. It was about, uh, going up to your boyfriend… and um, hugging him... when he’s playing video games.”

“Oh.” You answer lamely, not knowing what to say. You unsuccessfully try to push away the image of you attempting that challenge with your best friend. “Those are really cute.”

“Really?” He says doubtfully, wrinkling his eyebrows and fiddling with the frayed sleeve of his sweater. “Wouldn’t the dude get mad?”

You don’t know what suddenly possessed you to do this (you’ll have to ask Renjun and his paranormal loving ass later), but you thank whatever demon did for that split second because you find yourself gently grabbing Mark’s arm and slipping your head underneath it. You swing one leg over his lap and settle down until you’re securely sitting in his lap, bent legs on either side of his hips, hands curled around the soft fabric of his sweater on both sides and resting on top of your thighs. His arms instinctively go around your waist, wrapping around you securely.

You tilt your head to the side slightly, studying the flustered boy in front of you with a teasing, albeit a little anxious, smile on your lips. “Are you feeling mad?”

Splotches of red litter his cheeks and decorate the tips of his ears, but your best friend furiously shakes his head at your question, bashfully ducking his head afterwards and muttering a soft “No.”

You swallow hard, heart pounding erratically in your chest as you timidly ask, “Would you be mad if I do this?”

Mark looks up at that, confusion written all over his face. His arms start to loosen around your figure, hands now resting on your waist. “If you do what?”

You take a deep breath. “This.”

You lean in and gently press your lips against his. Mark freezes in shock, and you quickly retreat soon after, gnawing at the inside of your cheek as you wait anxiously for his reaction. Your heart feels like it’s about to fall out of your chest and be buried six feet under.

A tiny noise of surprise belatedly escapes from him and crimson spreads across his cheeks like wildfire. His doe eyes are wide and sparkling, staring at you in bewilderment. Your best friend lets out a small laugh of disbelief before a full blown smile breaks out across his face. He gazes at you adoringly, breathing out softly, “I’m not mad at that.”

You perk up at that, draping your arms around his neck as you lean forward, beaming. “Really? You’re not?”

“Definitely not.”

This time, Mark meets you halfway, his lips slotting against yours perfectly and making you feel tingles up and down your spine. Your eyes are closed, and you are so hyper aware of the way his hands grip your hips, how he tugs you closer, and how his lips chase after yours. The number of butterflies from earlier multiply in your stomach, and you have ascended past cloud nine by now.

When the two of you break apart, your eyes flutter open, and you nudge your nose against his affectionately. The brightest grin blooms on his face once again, and he buries his face in the crook of your neck, muffling his little giggles and hiding the awfully vibrant cerise that rapidly blossoms on his face.

“Is this a good time to tell you congrats for completing your first challenge?” you say, resting your cheek against the crown of his head. You pull away when he lifts his head up, surprised.

“I wasn’t playing video games though,” he says slowly, processing your words and thinking back to the challenge that started this all.

“It was a different challenge. It’s the one that Hyuck did a few weeks ago,” you confess, and realization dawns on him, his face lighting up for a split second before a look of horror takes over.

“Oh, no. Is that why you had your phone recording on the bookshelf?” Mark asks, dread beginning to cloud his mind.

“Yes…” you say slowly, a little perplexed. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Oh my god, I ruined your video,” he moans, dropping his forehead onto your shoulder. “I saw your phone when I walked in and thought you were filming earlier and forgot to turn it off, so I turned it off for you.”

When the words finally register in your mind, you can’t stop the laughter from bubbling out of your throat, and he raises his head up to look at you with wide doe eyes at the pretty sound. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to!”

You can’t stop laughing at the situation, and he looks at you worriedly, gnawing on his bottom lip slightly. You force yourself to calm down, a soft chuckle leaving your lips before you beam at him, leaning in and placing the softest kiss on the tip of his nose. “It’s okay, Mark. I’m not mad. That video wasn’t important anyway.”

“But still,” he whines before letting out a groan and slapping his hand against his forehead when the realization sinks in even further. “I’m such an idiot.”

“But you’re my idiot now, right?” you say teasingly, albeit a little shyly as well, as you reach over to tug his hand away from his face and lace your fingers with his.

“I mean, I kinda thought I was always your idiot,” Mark laughs softly and a little embarrassedly, eyes averted and cheeks turning pinker than ever. The largest grin spreads across your face at that, and you turn away slightly to hide it. You didn’t think your best friend can possibly be any more endearing, but he manages to prove you wrong every time.

“Well, then now you can add ‘Y/N’s boyfriend’ to your resume,” you say, and he fails to suppress the pleased smile appearing on his face at your remark, his rosy cheeks rising even taller than skyscrapers.

“So, uh, what sort of job description does that have?” He gazes at your intertwined hands in wonder, still completely giddy at the reality of you being his best friend and something more.

“Sharing hoodies, giving me attention, kissing, holding my hand, going on dates, you know, the basics,” you answer, squeezing his hand tenderly, and his doe eyes instantly light up. Mark feels a little bolder than before, and it shows when he grins widely and says:

“Can we do number three again?”

“Yes, we can, Eggy Boi.”

He wrinkles his nose at the name, disgruntled and unimpressed, as he crosses his arms over his chest, sulking. You let out a laugh before leaning in and crashing your lips against his. He immediately relents at that, enthusiastically responding and hugging you closer to him, and you can’t help but smile into the kiss as you feel his own smile appear as well.

At that moment, you decide that you want to change Mark’s personal brand. Because his should be “absolutely wonderful, positively amazing, a cute kisser, your boyfriend, and your bestest friend.” And yes, that is most definitely more than the allotted three words, but again, who’s really counting?

Certainly not you when you’re too preoccupied with kissing your best friend. Correction: best friend and new boyfriend.

One new notification: donutkillmyvibe uploaded a new video!

moominjun commented:

so you’re saying the reason why we didn’t get the highly anticipated best friend challenge video is because @ marklyrawr turned the camera off?

donutkillmyvibe replied: yes 😔 I’m sorry to disappoint everyone 🤧

nanaislove replied: omg no bby it’s ok 🥺🥺💞💓💓💝💗 you didn’t have to make an apology video for that 🥺💗💓💘💖

goofys.chuckle replied: yeah it’s mark’s fault. he’s the disappointment here 🥴

morklyrawr replied: hahahahaha stfu hyuck

tytrack commented:

mark is going through puberty. I apologize

dobunny replied: @.@

goofys.chuckle commented:

are we getting whip(ped)lash pt 2 by eggy boi?

morklyrawr replied: YOU’RE THE ONE WHO STARTED THAT NAME?????

goofys.chuckle replied: uh gotta blast 🚀

showmethemonet replied: @ goofys.chuckle does this mean you’re staying over again?

goofys.chuckle replied: @ showmethemonet yes if you want your super cute, mega talented, very handsome boyfriend to still be alive 🥺

showmethemonet replied: @ goofys.chuckle oh my god I didn’t know I was dating bts jin???

moominjun replied: LMFAOOOOO

goofys.chuckle replied: heart 💔 been broke 📉 so many times ⏰ i don’t know 🤔 what to believe 💯 mama 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 said 🗣 it’s my fault 😢 it’s my fault 🤦🏻‍♂️i wear my heart ❤️ on my sleeve 💪 i think it’s best 👍🏻 I put my heart ❤️ on ice 🧊

jenojam commented:

why am I not surprised……

itsmebetch replied: just mark thingz 🍉

suhprisemf commented:

mark your head looks flat af

jungjaeprince replied: 😂😂😂

10vely replied: @ jungjaeprince be quiet don’t cry

letswonwon commented:

whoop whoop

junguwu commented:

OMG CONGRATS ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP SWEETIE 😍😍

takoyaki_prince commented:

MARK!!!!! you look handsome !! 😘

jisungpwark commented:

rip to @ donutkillmyvibe ’s future videos that mark will ruin. press f in the chat to pay respects 🙏🏻

bigheadking replied: F ✊🏻😔

peachyangel replied: f 🥺🥺

yoitslucas replied: F 🤪🤪🤪 but glad you’re happy, man ❤️

donutkillmyvibe replied: F 💔

morklyrawr replied: @ donutkillmyvibe wtf babe????

officialgordonramsay commented:

didn’t i tell you to get back on tinder ?

apado_god commented:

nice 😎👍🏻

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