#I’ve gone for real Rao this time too

[feliciadraws]

LYCORIS

I was listening to this song and I just HAD to do a thing of Rao with it, like the vibe of the song just made me think of her and there isn’t enough angsty symbolic art of her, even though her story is TRAGIC.

And yeah @nec-romantic-nightmare kinda inspired the red spider lily here, since they’re used to symbolise death.

#FINALLY SOME NEW ART HECC YEAH #okami #okami rao #rao #Okami fanart #my artwork #I’ve gone for real Rao this time too

[broifoundher]

What is this junk? : An old one shot with Kara Danvers from my time before joining Tumblr.

Supergirl + Arrowverse SPOILERS

Angst (badly written), happy (yes) ending (?).

A/n : Literally just copy pasted because I’m too afraid to change it.

“Hey” she breathed in “It’s gonna be okay. I’ve got you.” She said, but you just smiled at her.

“Kara, one of my legs is crushed, I have a pole pierced into my stomach and my right arm has been torn apart. We both know I’m not gonna make it.” You whispered but she just shook her head in denial.

“No, no. *sniffle* I’m gonna bring you to the DEO and—” she said as she went to pick you up, but you cut her off

“I’ll bleed out into your arms.” You sent her a small smile. “It’s okay Kara… I’m just glad I’m not alone right now.” You said with tears streaming down your face.

Which flooded her face with more. “Never, you’ll never be alone.”

“Because I won’t be (existing) anymore. But you will still live on. I’m so sorry to bring this pain into your life…”

“No…. No, because you will live. You will live on with me. And we’ll laugh together about you being sorry again at the worst possible time. We’ll get married, have kids.” And the fact that she had already seen a future with you in it made your heart sink even further.

“Kara, please stop…” if she went on, you weren’t sure you would be at peace with dying anymore. “I love you. But I’m not gonna retrieve my apology about leaving you to deal with these shitty feelings. Kara, I…” you broke down “I wish I could have had that kind of life with you, but you’ll have to find someone else for yours.”

“No”

“Yes, please…” your eyelids were getting heavier to lift as you blinked “I don’t want to be the reason that the beautiful and amazing person I met back then wouldn’t get her happy ending.”

“My happy ending is with you.”

“Kara…”

“No, no no.” She broke down as she couldn’t hear your heart beat anymore.

Her hands were full of your blood as she had been trying to keep it inside of you. And she hung her head down when your eyes kept staring without a single hint of life still inside.

…………..

“I couldn’t save her, Alex. She died… *sniffle* I’m Supergirl for Rao’s sake!”

“I know…”

“And the worst is, there were other people there who were in need of my help. And yet, they had to see a hero lift them up with shaky arms.”

“I’m so sorry Kara…”

“How am I gonna live without her? I was gonna propose to her! If— if only—”

“Stop, don’t think like that Kara… It happened and you will have to find a way out. And I, and James, and Winn—”

“Will never be able to replace her” Kara cut her sister off “I just want her” she whispered.

“I know…” was all Alex could say.

………………………………………………………………

“Hey Kara.”

“Hey Barry, nice wedding.” She smiled.

“Thanks, I see you brought your sister as your plus one… Want to tell me what happened?”

Her eyes diverted to her own drink.

“She died Barry.”

“Oh my god, Kara. I’m so sorry.” He said as he hugged her.

“Yeah, everyone is… Even she was…” she frowned at the memory. Not making her laugh at all.

“Hey, I wish I could say you’re gonna find someone, but I’ve only ever loved one woman in my life… So I’m not sure I can tell you anything inspiring.”

She smiled.

“Thanks Barry, but you don’t have to…”

“Yes, yes I do. I’m your friend and the one who invited you here.”

“It’s ok, today I’m here for you. And I have to say, I’m enjoying my time.”

“Happy to know that, then want to come join us downstairs now?”

“Yeah, alright.” She said as she followed him down the stairs to where the others were gathered.

……

“And my wife” said Earth X’s Oliver.

“Ew, gross.” Kara said out loud, even the evil version of herself got to be with their loved one.

This was making Kara even sadder than before.

………

~At the beginning of Crisis on Infinite Earth~

“They’re gone. My parents, all of Argo. I lost them again…”

………

~At the end of Crisis on Infinite Earth~

“You know what Oliver told me?” Barry said to Kara “he said :

‘Dying is the easy part. That he was at peace. That the real heroes, they’re the ones that have to keep going. So he told me to keep going.”

“I guess that’s what my girlfriend meant, but didn’t have enough time to think of the perfect way to say it…”

………

~After Crisis on Infinite Earth~

“Good morning sleeping beauty! You have the Nobel Prize ceremony to get to in an hour or so.” You said as you straddled your wife’s body.

“(Y/N)?” She said with tears in her eyes “Am I dead? Is this heaven?”

“Hey, Darling, are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?” You said suddenly concerned, grasping her cheeks to look her in the eyes.

“No… I wish it was all only a dream…But the dream is you… being here” she whispered as she cupped your hands.

“I’m real Kara. Here.” You took her hand and let it rest over your beating heart “I’m here.” You whispered, intending to reassure, to ground her, but it only made her shake her head again as she started crying.

“No, you died. This has to be another Black Mercy!” She gently pushed you away as she stood up and started pacing. “I just don’t get how a Black Mercy could’ve attached itself to me, the multiverse was dying…”

“Kara, if you have to talk about your dreams, of course I’m always here to listen, but if you expect to find explanations, you should ask Nia…”

She stopped dead in her track. “You know Nia?”

“Kara, are you serious right now?” You asked, not in a pissed or sarcastic way, but in a worried, honest manner.

“I, yes I am. You died on the [date] I remember it clearly, I always go to the graveyard on the [date]. I bring you flowers, your favourite ones as they remind me of you, care for your tombstone, make sure to keep it steady” she hiccuped in her sobs.

“Kara…” you said, your own eyes filling with tears. You shook your head at the sight of your wife being so broken. “I’m so sorry you had to live with this.” You wrapped your arms around her body. Because you believed her.

She chuckled. “I know, you said the same thing before you died. How you told me to live on anyway. And then I told you you’ll get to live on too, together, with me. How we would get married, have kids. But then you shook your head again, apologizing and saying I will have to find someone else *hiccups* when all these years, *inhale* I’ve never been able to find anyone else…” she was weeping into your shoulder, gripping onto your shirt as you soothed her with a hand in her hair.

You don’t know how long it had been, still just processing everything. But then Kara’s phone rang.

“It’s probably Nia wondering where you are.” You whispered softly, not wanting to startle the woman in your arms.

“I don’t care. I just want to stay here with you.”

“But Kara, it’s the Nobel Prize!” You said as you pulled yourself back. “I believe you, but I also remember how excited you were about it. I mean, how couldn’t you, your friend is getting the Nobel Prize!”

“My friend?” She furrowed her brows

“Yes, Lex Luthor.”

She almost choked

“Excuse me, I don’t know if I should be more distraught by the fact you just said Lex Luthor and I are friends or because he’s receiving the Nobel Prize?”

“Neither? Because it’s a good thing?”

“I’m sorry, I gotta go.”

“Sure, say hi to Nia for me. And don’t forget to ask her about your dream.”

“I will.”

……

“Kara! Just in time!”

“Oh Rao, she wasn’t kidding.”

…….

“Alex!

Literally just stops there. 🫤 I know, sorry. 😐 I can try rewriting it and giving it an end if you want. Just tell me. But otherwise, I just thought to share with the fandom. Okay, bye.

Alternatively, this could also be seen as a concept to which I wouldn’t be against writing a full story. In my today’s style.

Okay, real bye this time.

#kara danvers x reader #supergirl #kara danvers #kara danvers x fem!reader #fanfic ideas

[cyclone-rachel]

happy birthday @mistyautumn !!

~

It’s sunrise, when she finds him on the Tower balcony.

“Good morning, Kara.” he says without turning around and looking at her, and she has to wonder if he saw her in his peripheral vision, or just calculated that she would be there at that time.

(To be fair, he had seen her doing just that- watching the sunrise- whether it was at her apartment, or the DEO, quite a few times- and had joined her, however briefly before their days had truly started. It hadn’t been for a while, though… for a couple of reasons she didn’t want to think about right then.

No point in metaphorically bringing dark clouds over their sunrise.)

“Hi, Querl.” she says standing beside him- and caught a small smile from him, as his eyes met hers. She hadn’t intended on using his real name, but it just happened to slip out- and she hadn’t even heard it in such a long time, she hoped she’d gotten the pronunciation right.

“What are you thinking about?”

“I… I missed you.”

She nods.

“I understand.” she says, and holds her hand out- waiting, as slowly his hands come out from behind his back, where they were so carefully positioned, and one of his ends up in hers. He looks over at her, and she smiles at him.

“I missed you too.” she says.

She missed everything- her friends, this whole city, this whole world, even though she doesn’t know it as well. She missed her apartment, and donuts, and pizza and potstickers and sister nights with Alex and game nights with everyone.

She missed sunrises, and for that matter seeing the sun at all, getting to greet it in the morning and feeling its light. Feeling closer to Rao, to the remnants of Krypton that she holds in her heart.

And yes, she missed him, she realizes as she sees a tear fall down his cheek. She had all along, but seeing him here and now makes her remember how little she’s seen him even before she was thrown into the Phantom Zone.

(And she wonders how much he’s speaking for the past few months too, in addition to this more recent separation)

She especially missed… not exactly this new version of him- but the person he was always meant to be, who he should have been were it not for his father’s need to assert control and prevent him from being his whole self. Truly uninhibited, happy- standing tall and proud in a purple super-suit, greeting the sunrise in his natural Coluan form. Not burdened by secrets or Lex anymore, holding nothing back.

“Ah.” he says, following her eyes as they quickly travel up and down his body. “You noticed.”

“Noticed that your image inducer isn’t turned on right now, yeah.” Kara says, with another smile. “I… haven’t seen much of you like this. You look really good. I’m happy for you.”

“Oh.” He answers. “It’s more than just turned off. I’ve removed it from my person, completely.”

She raises an eyebrow.

“I… have wanted to do so, since I officially rejoined the Super-friends, as it were. But I waited- and thought it would be appropriate to tell you first, since you inspired me to remove my inhibitors to begin with.”

“I did.” Kara realizes. Some of her memories are still a little bit hazy, but she remembers that conversation- hearing the pain in his voice as he recounted his story, and she realized how much his father’s fears had impacted him, and led him to fear himself. Remembered putting as much conviction as she could into her reassurances that he wasn’t like his mother, and would never be.

She’d told him he was loved, and she…

She and the rest of them had ignored him, as he worked for Lex. She’d forgotten- and none of what she’d said had carried over to what had happened next.

“I’m sorry.” She says. “For doubting you.”

“And I am sorry for failing you.” He answers. “Being unable to figure out a way to navigate the Phantom Zone sooner, and unable to prevent you from being sent there in the first place.”

“You did the best you could.” Kara tells him. “Everything is different in there now, and…”

At least it was only a few weeks.

Sometimes, even now in her apartment, Kara has nightmares- that this is just another illusion, and when she does wake up, when she’s pulled out for real, it’ll be another 24 years lost, her family and friends all having lost hope and moved on without her.

She has to keep reminding herself it’s real, that what she sees now is all true. She has her father back, she wasn’t gone for very long, and though Zor-El is different from when she saw him last (and she knows more about what he did, on Krypton) she’s still glad to see him again.

And she gets to wake up and see the sunlight, and talk with one of her friends again.

“I’m sorry.” She says, shaking her head. “You were talking about why you removed your inhibitors.”

“It is alright.” He answers. “There is… a lot of catching up, that we have to do.”

“There really is.”

“And yes- I was telling the truth, about your words being nothing short of magic.” He says. “Well… the subject of myself believing in “magic” as a concept is not relevant. The point is, I came to realize that I should trust myself, after said conversation- that it had been a long time, since the inhibitors were put on, and I was more than capable of self-control, no longer needing them. And whatever happened, you and the others would be there to help.”

“That’s right.” Kara says.

We should have helped more.

“Now… I have indeed become overwhelmed by my emotions. But I am learning to deal with them- in ways that all beings do. Naturally, without needing to regulate them by force.”

Kara squeezes his hand.

“I had to deal with that too.” She says. “You never stop learning it, I guess. But you still try.”

“Indeed.” He tells her. “And because I have removed my inhibitors, I can finally look at myself and not feel ashamed. I dealt with them for such a long time because I thought I deserved them, and tried to do the best I could while wearing them. Now, I see that I can be so much more, and indeed I am- and I want to show that to the world, permanently.”

“But what about the timeline?” she asks. “Wouldn’t people seeing a Brainiac helping Supergirl… change things?”

“Not as significantly as… other events.” He answers, glancing back at the Tower. “That is another conversation. But I have run calculations, and the answer for this particular question is no.”

“Then I’m proud of you.” Kara says. “Thank you for sharing this with me.”

She turns to face him, and he turns toward her, expression telling her that he isn’t completely sure what to do next.

“Can I hug you?”

“Of course.” He says, and she does- hoping that this begins to make up for lost time.

But they have a lot of opportunities for that, and this is only the start of a new day for both of them.

And she, for one, can’t wait to continue it.

#papa don't look #supergirl #supergirl season 6 #kara danvers #brainiac 5 #fanfics #kara zor el #querl dox #supergirl spoilers #ish? #supergirl speculation #had to toss this possibility in there #in response to how much green brainy content there's been recently #karadox #happy birthday autumn! #i hope your day is lovely #because you deserve it #ship: believe in all the possibilities

[anxiouslowercase]

dancing on the kitchen’s tiles

fandom: dc comics warning: none summary: at their sleepover-that-is-totally-not-a-date, jon learns that billy does not know how to slow dance. thankfully for him, he’s ready to fix that right away. notes: yes, another rare pair; no, i do not regret it. this prompt was picked from this list with the help of the always lovely @achinghcarts ! thank you so much for your help and support always!

Jon Kent, who so far had been eating the remaining cake batter from the bowl, letting his feet dangle gently from where he's sitting on the counter, freezes in place as he looks at the other boy's face. The spoon hangs comically from his lips, content probably already eaten but feeling too shocked to bring himself to put the utensil down. In front of him, Billy Batson smiles a mix between sheepish and endeared, arms crossed as he leans against the breakfast table.

“Are you serious? Like, for real?” Without changing his expression, Billy shakes his head. “Not even, like, for fun? As you watched movies?”

“There's not a lot of slow dancing in the movies I've watched,” is his excuse, and that seems to be enough to put the half kryptionian back in motion.

He drops the spoon on the already scrapped clean bowl and leaves it on the sink, quickly jumping down from the counter. The other boy straightens up, a slightly confused frown appearing on his face.

It had all started with Jon telling him about how he'd come back from patrol a bit earlier than usual and had caught his parents laughing and slow dancing all along the living room and the hallway. He'd made fun of Clark because he looked not nearly as smooth as the people on TV and even Tim was much better at it (which he knew because he had accidentally spied on them, but it was so accidental Billy it really shouldn't even count as spying) and, honestly, who could not know how to slow dance? And, it turns out, his boyfriend-not-boyfriend didn't, in fact, know. Jon was appalled to say the least because how was that even possible.

“We're fixing that right now,” he finally says, responding to the unsaid question on the older boy's face, as he makes a bee line for his phone.

“How come it's something to fix?” A soft smile inevitably comes back to his lips as he turns to look at the youngest Kent because dang he's cute. “People like me make people like your dad look better, you know.”

“But you are better than my dad,” is his whole explanation. “Have you seen The Lion King?” At the confused nod, he grins. “Great, so you already know the song, we're halfway there.” And just as he's done talking, the first few notes of a song Billy can't quite place right away start coming out of the speaker. It would be a lie if he said he wasn't the tiniest bit nervous when Jon started making his way back to him.

“We really don't have to do th--”

“It's actually kind of fun,” the half kryptionian cuts him off, gently grabbing his wrist and pulling him away from the table. “And we can keep talking and it's not like we're doing anything more interesting.” And Billy was ready to point out that they could always just put a timer on their cake and go watch TV or play some videogames, when the cheeks of the boy he was stupidly crushing on turns a pretty shade of pink, one that almost right away makes him forget what he planned on saying. Jon, on the other hand, looks down. “A-and... Maybe I want to. Do it.” He clears his throat. “It's... It's like a moment. F-for couples a-and... Future. Couples.” The blush extends a bit further up his face and, really, what was the Phyllis boy to do but just smile (and maybe melt a little)?

“... You want to have a... Couple moment? With me?” His voice is slow, gentle, and sounds way more in control and collected than how he actually feels. Vaguely, in the back of his mind, he seems to be able to conjure up an image of two lions in love as the music continues - go figure.

“Is that weird? Or bad?” Jon asks, suddenly shy. With a soft smile, the other boy shakes his head and uncrosses his arms, showing his open palms up towards him.

“You're the boss.”

It could be the act of trust, or how he didn't belittle his opinion, or just how he didn't start complaining when it came to doing something silly that *he* wanted. Or maybe it could be because he'd noticed he really liked Billy, and the fact that he'd basically said yes to having a cheesy, couple-y moment with him had his stomach doing flips. And maybe Jon was a textbook hopeless romantic. Whatever the case, it doesn't even take a second for a grin to paint his face.

Hoping for his palms not to be too sweaty, the half kryptionian takes the other boy's hands and doing his best to pretend he is not shaking in both nerves and anticipation, he guides one of them to his waist and keeps the other on his. Timidly, he takes half a step closer (yet refuses to look past his chin because... Because... Well, he isn't sure, but probably because his heart feels a little weird right now as it is.)

“Right, so... So you can keep your hand there and--” he swallows. “I'll keep... We can keep the other one up here, and...” His gaze falls to their feet, and he takes small steps to move them to a nearby spot in which they won't collide against a chair, for that would definitely take from the charm of it. “And now we just... I mean, my mum taught me how to count for... For the waltz? B--”

“Is this a waltz?” It's funny, because Billy's voice is nothing short of a whisper, yet it somehow manages to startle him. And so his eyes immediately move up and he is already looking at him and... And could it be, that his gaze is just as soft as his voice? Is that too cheesy?

He can feel the warmth spreading on his cheeks and slightly down his neck, and though it is a sort of reassurance to see that the other boy's face is also lightly flushed, Jon still finds that his mouth opens without any real sound coming out of it. Which is so stupid. He quickly snaps it shut, but that doesn't make is less difficult to come up with a sensible reply. And so, just as stupidly, he shrugs.

“Maybe not.” Billy just hums, contemplative yet not quite looking away, and the younger boy fidgets. “R-right, so... So then you can--” he brings the hand that was on his to his waist, and then puts his on his other shoulder. “And I do this and... We can just sway.”

“... Just sway?” There's a hint of amusement in the Phyllis boy's voice, but he still starts moving very slowly - though hardly on time with the music. “This is all there is to the great art of slow dancing?” The teasing note seems yo be enough to make Jon's shoulders relax (which he didn't know were so tense, to be honest) and he even manages to roll his eyes - though he does try to guide the other into a more rhythmic movement.

“You still have to... Let the music guide you - which you're not doing.” Billy chuckles, and he can't help but smile a little. “And my parents say it's not just the dancing, or how you do it - it's the whole experience that counts.”

“How so?” The older boy asks, head tilting to the side as his hands wrap a little bit tighter around the other's waist; he doesn't seem to notice.

“It's also the song, and where you are and who you're dancing with. Mom says that even if your partner steps on you during most of the dance, it can still be the most special one, cause it's...”

He trails off, palms already getting sweaty again because maybe his explanation is being too cheesy and he's making this moment too much of a moment and they were just supposed to be making a cake for their middle-of-the-night snack but now they're too close and he can feel the love tonight, mister Elton John, he really can, but can he?

And maybe the question is too evident on his face, or maybe Billy is also going through a similar thinking process, because he smiles a bit more confident and nods, fixing his eyes on his.

“Cause it's you. And us.” Dear Rao please don't have his father checking on his heartbeat because he's pretty sure he's going into cardiac arrest. “I get it.”

“... You do?” He nods again, and now Jon can feel the warmth going all the way down his chest, too.

“I would've tried this much sooner if I'd known I'd get this moment with you.” Now he's definitely going into cardiac arrest.

And the thing with Billy is that they have been toeing the line here and there for a while now. They've gone on dates that aren't quite dates, and they have hold hands without really putting a name on anything, and they have made comments that, according to Maya, are a way too clear indicator that they both want to keep moving forward. But that's all there is, they've both been respectful and quite timid about taking steps - or at least they had been until now, because before he can fully process the moment itself, Jon's mouth runs without his permission and softly blurts out:

“Hey, can I kiss you?”

For a second that is way too long, if the half kryptionian has any saying on it, there's only silence except for the music still playing from the phone. And, to be completely honest, he does have the knee-jerk reaction of pulling away because what if he went too far? But, thankfully, before he can actually move, Billy smiles and hugs him just a tiny bit closer.

“I'd like that, yeah.”

#jon kent #billy batson #billyjon #superboy #shazam #we stan rareships in this account #ch.: jon kent #ch.: billy batson #r.: billy and jon

[my-arlington-academia]

Sweet Elite... MCL style remake because I love suffering

Look, I know we all have trauma because of MCL but I've decided to transform that trauma into comedy because RIP MCL tbh.

Okay so uh. First things first, Tadashi VS Axel, right? They hate eachother but they secretly really love eachother and respecc eachother that's obviously why Axel decided to help when Tadashi's father was being a 🤡 Their hatred becomes bromance but then when Sweet Elite University comes around they'll hate eachother again to go back to their initial dynamic because... fuck development amirite?

Oh and Karolina? A complete bitch, she'll hate Scholar only because she finds them ugly and she hates poor people. No other reason at all. She bullies Scholar by blackmailing her and locking her up in basements. Neha is just mindlessly following her because she's her lackey, not her friend and she just really needs Karol to model for Rao designs. They don't actually have a genuine bond or anything. And Neha is a migrant btw. She's fleeing from the Indian government because her parents said "YOLO" and tried to save Indian women from all the bullshit they have to go through. Also, Neha is pansexual and secretly a lawyer.

Later we'll find out that Karolina's twin brother, Tegan, was being abused by their father but Karolina never noticed because... she thought that it's normal to be harsher with sons than with daughters...? And the reason why the father was doing it is because he lost his job, and the person who took his place reminded him of his son too much so out of frustration he let it all out on Tegan. Totally makes sense, right?

Oh and, Claire? You love Claire, right? She's so kind and cute and all? Well GUESS WHAT?! She almost dies!!! Yes that's right! She'll get in a traffic accident because she forgot to look both ways before crossing the road and then when she awakens in the hospital it turns out that she lost her memories!! She has amnesia!! Oh but she still somehow remembers that she had a crush on her best friend: Raquel. They have a heart to heart then Claire's memories come back because uh... whatever. They just come back okay?

Then um,... Tyler! You like Tyler huh? He's so funny and cool, he's a good dude and all. Well GUESS WHAT?? He was adopted because everyone knows that James Cameron doesn't have black children obviously 🙄 Oh but Tyler really wants to know what happened to his real parents!! So he asks Tegan to use his hacking skills instead of asking his adoptive parents for answers! But oh boy! They find that Tyler's parents are dead and he only has an older brother left! But that older brother was one of Raquel's close friends when they were younger so Raquel really idolizes him and tries to copy his toxic behaviour! Thankfully Scholar helps Raquel to get her back to normal. Raquel just had self-confidence issues all long but it's fine now 👍

Then um. Alistair... he has really loving parents but they decide to get divorced because they don't love eachother anymore! Alistair is heartbroken because he feels really bad for his younger siblings and he has the feeling that they'll never be happy again... but whatever! He sucks it up because who cares about his feelings!

Getting back to Axel tho, let's say that he had a toxic ex and she came back to Arlington! He listens to everything she says in hopes that maybe she'll get back with him... because fuck Scholar amirite? All this time they spent together? Gone. He only trusts his ex unless there's solid proof for uh... whatever bad thing she did in the past.

And Ellie... uh... OMG! I have a great idea guys!! She's a drug dealer! Who gives a damn about making some dumb robots? She gives up on her dreams and hard work to sell drugs because at one point she really loved smoking 'em. But oh no! She's so gangsta that the police is after her! Oh but actually nevermind, she was working with the police to send the drug dealers to prison. Too bad that they stabbed her and she lost a lot of blood! Thankfully Tegan had the brains to call the ambulance instead of listening to her saying that "Ohh 🙄🙄 it's just a small cut, it's gonna be totally fine guys! 👌👌"

Now let's quickly wrap up Sweet Elite so we can make Sweet Elite University! So uh. Your crushes? You love them? You spend years trying to woo them? Well forget that lol because we don't actually give a shit about our customers' feelings. You break up with all of them and we'll bring back only 4 of the main 10 because we need 6 new characters! So uh. Let's just say Tadashi, Axel, Karolina and Claire make it into Sweet Elite University because they won in the popularity polls so they're basically our pikachus, we can't throw them away!!!

And for the new main 10 uh... Let's add a teacher, yeah? That's hot right? Everyone knows that y'all wanted Coach D's d so let's just say his wife died in a terrorist attack or something, sounds good? Cool! Now you can date someone who's like 15 years older than Scholar. Oh and, since it was too painful for him to stay in Arlington after his wife's death Coach D got like, into a really emo phase so now he's an art teacher in Sweet Elite University. Oh and Scholar is an art student so it'll make it easier for you to frick your teacher. The departments? Oh who cares about that lol. The canon route was the fine arts department, okay? Also you won't get to customize your Scholar anymore, she only has straight long hair because according to the poll that was the most used hairstyle for Scholar! You can only customize her hair, eye and skin colors because oh boy we love diversity!!

Talking about diversity! One of the new main 10 will be a Korean boi because k-pop is really trendy lately. Let's also add another Indian. Bring back Neha instead of making a new character? Oh no, sowwy we don't dow twat hewe 😥

We just really want new players so we're changing everything, sorry if you thought this was an actual continuation of Sweet Elite. Haven't you realized it yet? The OG Sweet Elite is dead, okay? No need to cry though! All the rest of the canceled main 10 are doing fine! They're probably working in a farm after their parents died or something, but no worries! They're happy! They achieved their dreams of uh. Dating you in high school because that's all that mattered to them! Now that you broke their heart they'll just do whatever floats their boat.

Don't be so sad though! You still have Tadashi, Axel, Karolina and Claire! Since you already won them over in high school I'm sure that you can do it again in University 😉😉

#if you couldn't tell already #I fricking hate beemoov 😂 #I mean who doesn't #please don't kill me for making this 🙏 #sweet elite #se #main 10 #random thoughts

[returningwriter]

A Night at Lena’s

The sequel to A Night at The Lux. Roll the hype text! 

A night of talking leads to something more between Kara and Lena after the blonde hero’s revelations at Lux and her gift of everything to the raven-haired beauty.

It felt weird being on Lena’s couch again since it had been a while since she’d been in the woman’s apartment, but it wasn’t an unwelcome feeling of weirdness. Having taken off her cape, it was draped over a nearby chair and she had left the front of her suit open because she felt very hot for some reason. The rose she’d brought was in an old wine bottle and the small crystal reader was on the coffee table in front of them. Chewing on her bottom lip she watched Lena starting the video of her belting out Total Eclipse of the Heart with Lucifer playing the piano at Lux the night before.

Lena’s flawless features were hard to read, she saw an almost smile at the start of the video and then the raven-haired beauty gasped when she heard her confession that she was her very special girl. Lena glanced up at her and then looked back down at the phone in her shaking hands.

It was hard to stay quiet, but she knew she had to allow Lena to finish watching the video and instead she started working on what she was going to say next. Truth be told her plan hadn’t gone beyond the basics of show up, give Lena the crystal, the rose, and a passionate speech. Now she was here, sitting almost next to the prettiest girl she’d ever met which she now knew she wanted to be more than friends with.

The video ended and Lena put her phone down with shaking hands before turning to face her. The silence was killing her, she wanted to say something, she did words good after all but Lena had to go first.

“Why… why didn’t you say anything before now?” Lena asked looking up at her with her green eyes glistening and they carried in them a mixture of sadness and hope.

“I… didn’t know how deeply I felt for you. Not until someone helped me see things in a new light,” she answered and Lena scooted closer to her on the couch.

“Someone?” the raven-haired beauty asked with a raised eyebrow and she fought back a gulp. Was Lena jealous? Was she being teased?

“I got dragged to this club called Lux in L.A. by some of the other reporters and the owner… well he has a way of making you admit things to yourself. That was him on the piano,” she explained and put her hand on the couch between them.

“So… you’ve never been with a girl?” Lena asked and put her hand down close to hers, but they weren’t touching yet.

“I… on Krypton things were different and when I came to Earth I was told not to draw attention to myself… but no I haven’t,“ she said thinking back to her confusing teenage years in Midvale and how it was simply easier to act like everyone else.

“Well I have been, but I’ve had to be discreet, even James was a cover of sorts, but it was hard because you were there… always there,” Lena said softly and the ex-CEO reached out, brushing her fingertips against hers.

“I’m sorry, I know I hurt you so much and…” she started apologizing again, but with a speed that surprised her, Lena was up against her and pushing a finger with a perfectly manicured nail to her lips.

“Stop it! Please stop it, Kara! We messed up, both of us messed up a lot but being mad at you is a waste of time and energy and…” Lena started chastising her for apologizing again, but she wasn’t Kara Danvers wallflower right now she was Kara Zor-El the fearless superhero.

“And that’s not how you do things, is it?” she asked taking a gentle, yet firm hold of Lena’s wrist and pulling the finger away from her lips.

“No, no I don’t, I move forward,” the raven-haired genius said firmly but there was a slight hitch to her voice, and she dropped her grip on Lena’s hand worried that she’d scared her.

“I love that about you, you drive, your genius, your passion,” she said as they looked at each other with Lena put her hand on top of hers again.

“But why didn’t you notice me?” Lena asked with a small voice after a moment of silence passed between them. Oh boy, this one was the hard one and she knew it.

“I should have noticed what you were doing. I mean it was so freaking obvious, but I was too caught up in being Supergirl… being the good girl, the straight girl and you have this aura of danger about you,” she admitted and felt herself blushing.

“Dangerous, me?” Lena asked with a small laugh and again that eyebrow went up which made her blush harder.

“Have you seen yourself! Power-suits, amazing dresses, that confidence, your lipstick, and smirks. You can be terrifying when you want to be. Especially to someone who was so deep in the closet that it took the Devil himself to bring her out,” she blurted out and that made Lena bring her hand up to her lips and place a kiss on it.

“Go on…” the green-eyed goddess urged her and flashed her a small smile while politely ignoring the Devil part.

“But it’s not just your swagger I guess, you have such an amazingly kind heart and you’re so smart, like… so incredibly smart and I have all this stuff I’ve been wanting to talk to you about,” she kept praising the woman and it came easy.

“Now why couldn’t you have said that three years ago?” Lena asked her voice back to its usual husky tones and she felt a pang of loss when the green-eyed genius pulled her pale hand away.

“I wish I had, but I’m doing it now,” she said firmly and watched as Lena stood up. The raven-haired beauty sauntered over to a nearby liquor cabinet and poured herself a drink. Scotch from the look of it, brought the glass to her red lips as she found herself staring and not for the first time.

“Sing for me,” Lena said and took a sip while looking at her over the rim of the glass. That took her by surprise, but if Lena wanted her to sing, she would sing.

“I… umm… okay, any requests?” she said and stood up, smoothing down the front of her Supergirl suit and clearing her throat.

“Surprise me,” Lena chuckled and took another sip of her drink.

Thinking for a moment, she took a deep breath, before launching into an acapella version of How Long Will I Love You. The nerves were real as Lena watched her with an inscrutable look on her pale face. Allowing herself to sway back and forth she couldn’t help but smile as she reached the end of the song.

“How long will I love you As long as stars are above you And longer if I may How long will I love you? As long as stars are above you”

Lena gave her a long look and drained her drink. Then reaching behind her head the raven-haired beauty pulled out her ponytail and shook out her hair. Keep your cool Zor-El, she reminded herself, but she was staring, hard.

“Come here,” Lena ordered her with firmness to her husky voice that compelled her to take a step forward.

“Lena…” she started speaking but the ex-CEO actually shushed her with a raised finger, and she clamped her mouth shut.

“Come… here,” Lena said again while pointing to the floor in front of her, and she felt like she was being drawn forward as if compelled by some unseen force until they were face to face.

“Good, now I’m going to talk and you’re going to listen,” the raven-haired beauty told her, and she gave a muted nod.

“I will let you off the hook on the following conditions. Number one, no more secrets,” Lena started, sounding like she was in a boardroom making a deal and again she nodded because Rao it was hard to speak when being stared down by Lena in full bad-ass businesswoman mode.

“Number two, you have to take me out on a date and it better be good,” her recently realized three-year-long crush went on.

“Yes of course,” she blurted out and the wheels in her head were already turning. This was her chance, do all those things she’d dreamed of doing as a teenager but been too afraid to put into practice.

“Number three… put your glasses on please,” Lena paused and fumbling around in her suit she founded her glasses before slipping them on.

“There is my Kara… and number four, well we’ve got to see if this works…” Lena’s voice trailed off as she put both of her soft pale hands on her face.

“Great Rao…” she whispered in shocked surprise as Lena brought those ruby-red lips to hers and staying still got much harder as she fidgeted with her hands, unsure of what to do with them.

Lena got up on her toes and kissed her more deeply, right away the fireworks exploded in her head and she couldn’t hold herself back any longer. Bringing her hands to Lena’s hips she pulled the raven-haired woman closer and kissed her back. Lena’s lips moving against her was like nothing she’d ever experienced on either Krypton or any Earth, it was like unfiltered sunshine. In her excitement, she easily lifted the raven-haired woman of the floor and she heard her give small giggle into the kiss.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized breaking the kiss but didn’t put Lena back down yet. Holding Lena felt too gosh darn good and she’d wanted to do this for as long as she could get away with it.

“Don’t be,” Lena laughed and ran her hands up and down her arms. On reflex, she flexed her muscles which made Lena give an appreciative smile.

“God you’re strong,” it was Lena’s turn to blurt out something embarrassing and she gave another flex of her biceps.

“But we sort of suck at talking though,” she joked and the smile that lit up Lena’s face made her heart beat faster.

“Did you really think about me during the Crisis?” Lena asked and she gently lowered the woman to the ground but kept her hands on those curvy hips she’d watched sway back and forth for three years.

“I did, all the time, whenever things were dire, I thought about you,” she admitted and smiled back at Lena who kept her hands on her arms.

“That’s sweet but knowing you I shouldn’t be too surprised. You care about everyone,” Lena said and there was a softness to the woman she’d not seen in a long time.

“You’re not everyone, you’re my everything, so… umm did it work, because it worked for me like I’ve got a lot of working going on after that,” she blurted out and Lena gave a very happy laugh as her entire face lit up with joy.

“I liked kissing you too,” the ex-CEO admitted and put her arms around her neck, swaying back and forth.

With her hands still on Lena’s hips, she had an idea, it was a cute idea, but she wasn’t sure if Lena would go for it just yet. Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

“Can you… put some music on, please?” she asked the raven-haired beauty and that earned her another smirk.

“Hope, play something romantic and sappy,” Lena ordered some unseen computer program and soft music filled the apartment.

“I’m not sappy,” she protested but that earned her a disbelieving laugh from Lena before they started swaying together.

“I disagree, darling, you are the sappiest puppy dog I’ve ever met. The music is playing, what now?” Lena asked and there was something to her voice, maybe it had always been there, and she was hearing it for the first time. But she was sure Lena didn’t talk to anyone but her like that.

“Stand on my feet and hold on tight,” she instructed her, and Lena carefully stepped on her feet while tightening the grip around her neck.

“Don’t worry I won’t break,” she said when she felt that Lena was being careful with her grip, but she was the Girl of Steel.

“What are you going to do?” Lena asked curiously and in response, she started rising from the floor while slowly spinning them around.

“Oh god!” Lena gasped when they were a foot above the floor. Of course, she’d flown with Lena in her arms before, but nothing like this.

“I got you,” she whispered into her ear and kept floating them around the apartment to the rhythm of the music.

“I know,” Lena whispered back and so far, this night wasn’t going too bad as they danced together.

With Lena holding onto her they danced on the air, she felt the woman’s head resting on her shoulder and in response, she pulled her in closer. Feeling her heart beating like a drum she felt Lena’s lips brush against her ear and the raven-haired goddess whispered: “Relax…” The song ended and she was loath to go back to the floor. Flying with Lena felt nice and she didn’t want to let go.

“When I found out about you, I was so angry at first,” Lena admitted when she didn’t speak and squeezed her tight.

“I know and it hurt me, seeing you so angry,” she whispered back and after another moment of comfortable silence started lowering them back down to the floor.

“Don’t… not yet…I like flying with you… I missed it,” Lena whispered when she felt them descending towards the floor.

“In that case… can I show you something, outside?” she asked, and Lena looked into her eyes, giving her a quick nod.

Picking Lena up in a bridal carry she floated them towards the balcony doors and slid them open without putting her precious cargo down. Then she rose into the sky, higher and higher until they were far above the rooftops of National City.

“You see that star, top right from the Moon, not far from Jupiter?” she asked looking towards the stars and Lena’s green eyes followed her line of sight.

“Yes, is that…” Lena trailed off and she felt a tear running down her cheeks, this was something she’d never shown anyone.

“Yes, that is Krypton’s sun, that’s where I’m from,” she said with her voice choking up and Lena hugged her tighter.

“You’ve never shown that to anyone, have you?” Lena asked and even after the distance between them the woman still knew her so well.

“No, only to you now, when I promised you everything, I meant it,” she whispered softly and despite how well things were going she was still afraid she’d mess this up somehow.

“Fuck! Why do you have to be so sweet,” Lena cursed, and she gave the woman a curious look but instead she was kissed hard in mid-air.

“Why the cursing?” she asked with a smile as she floated them back down to the balcony below.

“Because I’m trying to go slow with you but it’s hard when you keep doing things like this,” Lena admitted when they touched back down on the balcony and jumped down from her arms.

“Hey, we don’t have to rush into anything. Trust me, I do want to make up for all the time we lost too,” she tried to stay the course, be the stronger person and do the right thing. She was Supergirl after all.

“I know, but you’re Kara, you’re so pure and sweet and this would be your first time and I don’t want to pressure you,” Lena tried to explain herself and there was a softness to the woman now and she gulped at the implication of her words.

“Hey, I said we would talk all night, but if you don’t want to talk than we don’t have too… I… I can rush things a bit if you want,” she said and now she was nervous, she’d never done this before.

“Come with me,” Lena said without missing a beat, took her by the hand and again she allowed herself to be led inside.

Lena led her through the living room and into the white decorated bedroom. Oh, crap she was in Lena Luthor’s bedroom in her Supergirl suit with her glasses on and at no point did she expect the night to turn out quite like this.

“Lena…” she tried to speak again but the green-eyed beauty cut her off before she could ask the woman if she was sure about this.

“We’ve known each other for three years, Kara, been through hell together. We don’t need to talk, but I also know that you’ve never done this before either,” Lena spoke with that same softness again while running those delicate hands over her shoulders. The fact the Lene was being slow and gentle showed how much the woman cared about her and when she thought about how this would be her first time, it made her pulse quicken.

“I… want to do this right too… because you’re my Sun and… gosh, you’re freaking beautiful! Like that I’m even here with you is more than I ever hoped for and…” she started babbling when Lena pushed her against the wall, well she allowed Lena to push her against the wall because she was caught by surprise.

“Stop being so god damn sweet,” the raven-haired woman all but growled and kissed her, but this time it was hard and hungry, and she had no choice but to allow Lena to take charge.

Lena’s hands were all over her, pulling at her suit, running through her hair and then she felt the woman’s tongue demanding entry against her lips. Letting Lena ravish her was the easiest decision of her life and soon she was grabbing at the woman’s hips for dear life. Three years of built-up tension exploded between them at long last.

“Show them to me,” Lena said pulling off her glasses and stroking her face while looking into her eyes.

“Show you what?” she asked feeling out of breath from the making out and her suit was pulled even more open.

“Your heat-vision eyes… show me them,” the green-eyed goddess asked with her voice breathy and pressed herself against her.

“I… okay…” she stammered and closed and opened her eyes, so they glowed red and it actually made Lena moan.

“You have any idea how hot you look when you do that?” Lena asked and she shook her head, she’d never even imagined that her heat-vision would be a turn-on.

“No…” she whispered shyly and with her eyes still glowing kissed the woman again and it was her turn to take charge.

Kissing Lena with all her pent-up emotions she was soon pawing and pulling at Lena’s dress, she wanted to touch, to explore and this was all so wonderfully new, but it was intoxicating to finally be like this with the raven-haired genius.

“Take me,” Lena whispered when the kiss broke again, and that soft dark hair was disheveled, and the blue dress was pulled out of place.

“You… sure,” she stammered, she had to ask, and in response, Lena reached behind herself and unzipped her dress which fell off her and down to the floor.

“Does that answer your question?” Lena asked with a raised eyebrow, but she couldn’t speak right there and then.

All that pale skin, all those curves and something primal and ancient came over her, in a flash, Lena was on the bed and she was on top of her. Gentle hands were on her hips and she leaned down and started exploring Lena with her lips and fingertips.

“Take your time…” Lena moaned sweetly, knowing that this would be her first time with a woman and she quickly realized that there wasn’t enough time in the world. Fully exploring Lena would take an eternity but she was fine with that.

The sun was shining in through the windows when she woke up and slowly opened up her eyes. Next to her was Lena laying on her side among the pristine white covers and looking at her with smiling green eyes. It had really happened! She’d slept with Lena Luthor as evident by her suit hanging off the headboard and the fact that she was very much naked.

“Been up long?” she asked as she stretched with a smile blooming on her face when she saw Lena.

“A few minutes, you’re adorable when you sleep by the way,” the raven-haired woman said softly and reached out to stroke her hair.

“Thank you,” she replied sweetly and leaned into Lena’s touch as those pale fingers combed through her hair.

“And last night was… wow,” Lena went on with a smile growing on her face and something about having put on wow-worthy performance made her feel all giddy.

“Yeah, but we do seriously suck at talking,” she giggled and cuddled up to Lena’s nude form under the covers still amazed how soft her pale skin was.

“But we make up for it in other ways,” Lena giggled, and she’d never heard the woman giggle before but by Rao, it was an amazing sound.

“It was everything I imagined it to be,” she admitted and ran her fingers through Lena’s dark hair and again it was so soft.

“Can’t believe I was your first but you’re a quick learner,” the raven-haired beauty said with a full-on smile on her face.

“Thank you, but I still owe you a date though,” she laughed and sighed contently when Lena snuggled closer with one leg over her.

“I look forward to it,” Lena whispered. kissed her cheek and then her lips and things got a bit blurry again.

“About last night… it wasn’t too soon was it?” she asked feeling warm all over when Lena pulled back.

“Darling, we’ve been dancing around each other for three years and the universe almost ended, no it wasn’t too soon it was way overdue,” Lena laughed and she couldn’t hold back, giving a loud squeal of joy she hugged the raven-haired woman.

“Cool! Hey, I’ll get us breakfast, how does something from Dublin sound? Then we can talk more?” she offered and tried to get out of the bed, but for some reason that made Lena laugh harder and simply pull her back in.

“No flying across the Atlantic Ocean for you today and I can’t believe I said that. No, we’re staying put and I’ll order us something in, you’re dating a billionaire now,” Lena countered and wrapped herself more tightly around her body.

“Can’t argue with that offer,” she giggled and started moving gently against Lena’s pale body under the covers. Hold on did Lena just use the D-word? But before she would over-analyze that she felt a soft and cool hand on her hip before it moved to other warmer places.

“Puppy want more?” the naked beauty teased her, and she bit her lower lip giving her a nod.

“You may have gotten me hooked,” she admitted and felt the familiar feeling of blushing as her cheeks heated up

“Did I now… guess I better give you another taste then, darling,” Lena almost purred before she vanished under the covers and it turned out that she herself was the breakfast.

“Great Rao!” she moaned and felt Lena go between her legs and soon she was writhing on the bed. Lena was good at this, holy Rao, Lena was too good at this and soon she was seeing stars she’d never seen before.

#supercorp #supercorp au #supercorpau #kara x lena #lena luthor #kara danvers #my fic #fan fic #supergirl #supercorp smut #supercorp fluff

[gigilberry-wips]

Ch. 8. Merida’s POV: Late September

Media: Fanfiction

Rating: General

Warnings:

Verbal micro-aggression directed at Merida. It’s after the first chapter break and the beginning and end of it are marked with “+++”

Fandoms: Harry Potter - J.K Rowling, Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons/The Big Four, Brave (2012)

Characters: Merida (Brave), Original Female Characters, Original Male Characters, Original Non-Human Characters

Tags: Hogwarts AU, kid!fic, Boarding School, Fantasy Elements, Angst, Family Angst, Relationships, Bullying, Growing Pains

Word count: 4,648 words

Chapters:

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24

AO3 Link

Summary:

Merida’s first month of Hogwarts is not off to a good start

.°○♧○°.

A/N:

I've had this sitting unedited in my drafts for ages. I literally have exams next week but this thing's been bugging me nonstop and I finally got fed up enough with my brain that I gave this an edit and chucked it into the void. This chapter isn't one of the happier ones, but it is a necessary, bridging chapter. Next chapter will have more good feels.

.°○♧○°.

Merida wondered if she’d gone mad.

Was it the homesickness getting to her? Was it the thought of attending day after boring day of classes? Was it the fact that that castle in particular gave her the worst feeling, like it was slowly growing smaller and smaller and the walls were edging nearer until they trapped her in and crushed her under their weight and she’d never see the light of day again?

…Perhaps that was taking it too far.

But that’s what it had felt like when she’d first come.

She woke up to the first day of classes and that’s when it hit. That this was real. That she wasn’t dreaming. That the night before had really happened and she was attending a real, proper, stone-and-mortar English boarding school.

And she…well. She panicked. She didn’t remember what happened but next thing she knew she was running through unknown corridors, scrambling up narrow stairs and twisting passageways until the stone walls fell away and she was met with green grass beneath her and blue skies above and she could finally, finally breathe.

She didn’t attend classes that first day. Or the second. Or the third.

She never stayed away for too long—the adults found her before then. They always found her.

The first time that happened was when she’d been curled up behind the greenhouses. The professor had sat with her, eventually talking her into walking with him back to the castle for supper.

The second time a different adult had found her. She’d led her to the school’s sports stadium where a group of older students in the green of her House had flown high overhead on brooms. Merida had sat and watched without anyone bothering her for a good two hours before the woman—who it turned out to be the flying instructor and game coach—asked them to bring Merida with them back to the castle. The seniors were a lot nicer about it than she’d expected…they were nicer in general than she’d expected, too.

The third day, Saturday evening, was when the adult who found her led her to a small, cluttered room and told her to wait. The old woman returned with Merida’s Head of House, Professor Rao.

Professor Rao was as Merida remembered her: straight backed, bare headed, and steel grey hair pulled back into a knot. The impassive look on her face made it hard to tell if she was dismayed or not.

The professor gave her two things. One was a letter addressed from home, the other a bracelet made of small black stones.

“This is a shielding device. It will not monitor your location, but should you wander too near a place within the castle grounds that is dangerous, it will detect it. It will notify a professor and you will be found. This also serves to give a base level of protection against various wards should you need it.”

Merida opened her mouth, ready to protest because she didn’t believe a word of that, but her professor held her hand up. “I cannot force you to attend your classes or stay within the castle, nor will I. But there are certain places here that will harm you if you are not careful. You will wear this until it is deemed safe for you to remove it.”

Maybe someone should’ve thought of that before letting wizards design this castle! But Merida didn’t say it. Nor did she say anything when the professor took her hand and slid on the bracelet. It automatically shrunk to fit neatly around her wrist. Rao gave her the letter, nodded to the other old woman, and left.

Merida waited until supper was well underway before she ventured back to the empty dorms.

In spite of the envelope bearing her mother’s name, the contents of it also held letters from her father, her little brothers, and even a few of the staff from home. They were sweet, some making her smile.

The smile dropped when she got to her mother’s. Unlike the diplomatic letters she’d been taught to write, this one was short and to the point. Her mother had heard that she’d missed the first week’s classes. Either Merida attended them, or her horse Angus would be given to another home.

Merida tore a hole in that letter. She raged and cried and spent the rest of the evening letting the feelings crash through her. By the end of it she felt nothing but defeat.

Her mother had made her stance clear. Merida could no longer run away.

.°○♧○°.

Monday morning found the Great Hall bustling with students. Merida’s stomach tightened.

She’d vainly hoped that the hall might’ve been emptier. At least then there wouldn’t have been so many students milling around while she enacted her plan. Or maybe it was better this way. Maybe she’d…have more options, if there were more students available.

That didn’t do much for her courage.

If she were someone who found it easy to wake up early then she wouldn’t have had this problem. But she wasn’t. Instead, she was surrounded by eye-witnesses, all ready and eager to watch her embarrass herself, and the only thing she had were cold, sweaty palms and buzzing nerves to show for it.

Merida paced the corridor, the cold feeling creeping further and further up her spine. Until finally she shook herself, squared her shoulders, and marched into the hall.

At one end of the Slytherin table sat a small group of students who looked about Merida’s age. One even appeared to be her roommate. Merida made a path to them.

Legs feeling wooden, Merida plunked down at the table. All three girls visibly jumped.

Smile! Her mind supplied. Merida tried.

“Good morning! Nice day out, isn’t it?”

None of the girls moved. They stared at her as if she’d just strutted up to them in a sparkling peacock dress and invited them out for poker.

Eventually her roommate, a thin faced girl with limp blonde hair, was the first to speak. “…Do I know you?”

  +++ Here it comes +++

 “I’m your roommate, Merida.” Still no understanding. “Merida…Dunbroch?”

“…Oh! Oh. Aren’t you the one who’s always absent at role call?” Said a girl seated to her roommate’s left.

Merida internally cringed. “Ah…well, yeah, that’s…me, haha. It’s, um—it’s a long story. Not that I’ll bore you with all that, promise.”

She tried to laugh it off, but her audience didn’t seem to notice. They were busy sharing glances between each other. Merida didn’t pick up anything from their faces, but it was her roommate who nodded and turned to face her.

“So, what do you want, Merida—is that how you pronounce it? Meh-ree-dah?” Her mouth stretched out in an exaggerated way, as if Merida’s name stuck in her mouth like chewing gum.

“I suppose? I…I was thinking we could be friends, I guess. I think I missed out on a lot last week and I’d really like to get to know you.”

“You theenk, huh?” Her roommate tilted her head, one pale eyebrow raised. “Well, yes, you did actually. But that’s where your problem is. You see, we’ve already made groups.”

“Oh…you did?”

Her roommate’s friend nodded, looking very serious. “Oh yes, of course. It was all decided on the first day. Slytherins are very studious about their work. We want to do well, you know, and we like working efficiently. Do you know that word?”

“What word?”

“Efficiently.” She said, slowly and carefully.

“…Yes? Why wouldn’t I?”

What were these girls playing at? And why were they all smirking?

Her roommate tittered like her friend had just uttered some kind of joke. She patted the girl’s shoulder. “Oh, don’t mind her. We just wanted to make sure. I mean, it’s very hard to tell sometimes.”

“Tell what? I’m sorry, but I don’t know what you’re talking about—”

“Wait, wait, wait, sorry—could you, could you repeat that?” She leaned forward, one hand going to her ear. “I cahn’t really understand what you just said.”

Merida stared at her blankly.

Something wasn’t making sense here. She knew she was new to all this—this living in a new place, attending a boarding school, being surrounded by more children her own age than she’d ever quite realised could exist in a place all at once. She knew it would take time to get used to all this and that things would likely feel strange at first.

But there was something very…off about this conversation.

Had…had she been wrong? Was this girl actually an idiot? Obviously, they were both speaking English, so what was there to misunderstand? She seemed to have understood her just fine a few moments ago, so why—?

Then it clicked.

  +++

 Merida abruptly stood up. Without looking back, she strode out of the Great Hall, her face burning hot.

What kind of—how dare they—!

They thought she was stupid. They’d been laughing at her. And it wasn’t even because Merida had done something to earn that, oh no, it was much worse.

What possessed those little twats to have that kind of gall? So maybe Merida wasn’t always the brightest candle in the bunch. And maybe that had shown itself more often than not, if her childhood scrapes were anything to base off of.

But those girls didn’t know that. What happened back there had absolutely nothing to do with that. And from her own House, too.

She was a princess. She’d been taking etiquette lessons as soon as she could understand what those were. She’d come out the other end knowing three languages and a passing knowledge of at least five different dialects, with more on the way if her mother had any say in it. She’d learnt to smooth out the “Scottish lilt” from her English on command until it was barely noticeable, or else what would be the point of diplomacy if no one could understand her?

Her accent was fine, better than fine, she knew for a fact—but that wasn’t the point. The point was that if any of those girls had known who they were talking to, they wouldn’t have dared say such things. If they’d known who she was, they would’ve cried at her feet!

Merida buried her face in her hands and unleashed a muffled screech.

This wasn’t going to work. It wasn't even midday and everything was horrible and this wretched school was all wrong and no one was doing anything to change that because her parents had never once listened to her or anyone who didn’t see the world the way they did.

But what could she do? Her torn up letter was still buried in the bottom of her trunk. Her “bracelet” held fast to her arm, still mildly cold even after spending so much time against her skin.

She could try asking some other students in her House. Perhaps…perhaps she’d just gotten the rotten ones. They couldn’t all be that bad, could they?

But what if they are? Or even if they aren’t, what if none of them can help her? What if they don’t want to?

The problem with missing the first week of classes was that she had no class notes. She didn’t know what they’d covered in the lessons, what part of her textbooks she needed to read, or what homework she should’ve done. She could attend all the classes she liked but that wouldn’t help her if she didn’t understand what they were teaching.

If she didn’t find help from somewhere soon, then she’d fall even more behind than she already was and that wouldn’t make anyone happy with her. She couldn’t take the risk of waiting until the end of the day to go to her classmates individually and try her luck again. She needed help now.

…She would ask her professors. The adults wanted her to learn, right? And she needed help so they had to help her, right?

At the very least she could go to them and ask which parts of the textbook they’d already covered, if nothing else.

Mind made up, Merida loitered in the corridor until the Great Hall began to empty. She waited until she spotted a bunch of Slytherin first years walking out—of anyone formed into groups that big, then chances were that they were first years.

Merida sidled up to the group and joined in the back. Those little pr—those girls from earlier weren’t there, and none of the other students called attention to her, so she summoned her courage and tapped the shoulder of the nearest girl.

“Do you know if we have Transfiguration today? I, uh, I forgot my schedule.”

“Oh, well, if I remember it right…we have Charms for 1st period and Transfiguration for 2nd. After lunch is our A.B.C.D.’s and then History.” The girl gave Merida a considering look. “Would you like to come sit with us?”

“Yes, please!”

The morning passed with Merida slowly becoming a ball of nerves. She tried her best to keep quiet and take notes, even if she didn’t understand them.

As promised, Transfiguration came after Charms. By then, Merida had to resort to sitting on her hands so she didn’t immediately run up to her professor and demand help. She waited for the last student to pack up and leave before she calmly, confidently, strode up to the front.

Her professor sat behind the desk organising papers. Different names were listed on the top, and it made her wonder again just how much homework she’d missed. Upon her approach, her professor glanced up.

“Yes, Miss DunBroch? What is it?”

Her brown eyes held a sharp gleam to them. Merida stood straighter. She wasn’t doing anything wrong. She would not make a fool of herself. She could do this.

“…Regarding the classes I have missed, I would like to request some help. I don’t quite know what homework has been given out. I have asked my classmates as well, and I will seek their help in completing the homework, but I also wished to ask from the source so that I don’t miss anything.”

There. That was proper enough. She’d stated her wants clearly without making them into demands, hadn’t accused anyone of unseemly behaviour—even if certain “anyone”s deserved it—and she’d promised to be responsible for herself. It’d taken her all morning to come up with that, and she was proud of it.

“Hm. That is all well and good. But do you have the notes you will need to complete the homework?”

Merida’s quiet victory dampened.

“Not—not yet. But I will get them.”

“Do you know which part of the textbook has been covered? Do you know when the first in-class test will come?”

“…Not…not yet. But I’ll ask…”

Merida trailed off, not quite meeting her professor’s unreadable look. She kept her eyes on the desk, kept her feet firmly rooted because she was not ashamed and she would not run.

Her professor put aside the papers and took up her wand. “If I remember correctly, you didn’t receive your schedule, did you?”

Merida quietly shook her head.

Rao pulled out two small pieces of paper. One she tapped with her wand, making it stiffen. When she gave it to Merida, it had the first year time table printed on it. The other paper she folded into a paper aeroplane, her bone hand working in tandem with the flesh one. Merida suppressed a shiver. A tap of the wand and the paper aeroplane went flying out the door.

She invited Merida to take a seat, so she did. A few minutes later a Slytherin student walked through the door.

At first Merida thought she was a prefect. But the girl didn’t look old enough, nor did she have the shiny badges the prefects wore. Instead, she had a head full of curly black hair, a wide, brown face, and a toothy smile that dimpled her cheeks.

“Miss DunBroch, this is Clary Daniels. Miss Daniels, I would like to introduce you to Merida DunBroch. Miss Daniels is in 3rd year and she will help you with the classes you’ve missed. Tell her what you need and she will see that you get it. Miss Daniels, would you mind assisting her?”

“Not at all, professor.” Clary held out her hand to Merida. “Hullo, there. I’m happy to meet you. Let’s get this sorted out, shall we?”

Merida didn’t know what to make of the girl, or her new situation, but she took her hand.

When the two walked out of the classroom, Merida expected her senior to arrange a meet-up in the evening. Worst case, she’d ditch her then and there.

Instead, Clary ushered her in the direction of lunch. She instructed Merida to eat while she headed up to the professors’ table. A few minutes later she returned, ate lunch with Merida, and led her back to the Slytherin common room.

Surprisingly, there were several students already lounging there. While Merida sat in a corner, Clary wandered around the room and talked to a few of the seniors. She went with some of them down into the dorms and came back up with an armful of notes-books that she laid on the table in front of Merida.

“Those are my friends’ old first year notes-books, so there’s no hurry to return them. The professor for my afternoon class is absent today, and I checked in with your other professors earlier and got permission for you to skip the rest of your classes for today, too. We’ll look over the homework part in the evening. Right now, we do your notes.”

Together, the two of them spent the rest of the day getting Merida’s notes in order. Merida didn’t start on her homework that day, but she did get to read a page or two from her textbooks and knew something of to expect the next day.

It took the better part of the week for Merida to finally catch up on the homework.

“Why did she give me to you?”

Clary glanced up from the book she was reading.

“Because I won the lottery.” She chuckled at the look Merida sent her. “Kidding, kidding. I heard what you said. But what exactly do you mean?”

“It’s just…” Merida vaguely waved her hand, trying to find the words, “…wouldn’t it have made more sense if our professor—um, our Head of House—had asked a prefect or someone like that to help me? That’s…that’s their job, right?”

“That’s true. I think I know why, though.” She pointed to the textbook propped in front of Merida, borrowed from another one of her friends so that the scribbled in notes could give her the answers to her Herbology homework. “It seems I’m known for getting along well with most people. And since I’m not that much older than you, I wouldn’t come off as intimidating as one of the higher years would’ve—speaking of, I don’t think I’ve seen you talking with anyone else yet. Haven’t you made any friends?”

Merida looked away. She shrugged, rubbing at the ink on her nails. “It’s…awkward. Right now. Earlier, I didn’t…I wasn’t really there much, you know? Or in the classes. So…”

“…So now everyone else is pared up and you don’t really know where to start?”

Merida nodded.

“Eh, happens to the best of us. You’ll get there eventually, don’t worry. But just in case—” Clary leaned forward, bumping her hand with Merida’s, “—if there’s ever something bothering you, you can tell me, okay? That’s what seniors are for.”

“Thanks.” Merida mumbled. It was easier to say that than admitting what had really been on her mind the last few days.

Mainly, it was that awful girl she’d met on Monday. Turned out that sharing the same House with someone meant that one tended to see them around often. And she kept popping up everywhere.

It wasn’t even her toting around the same group of girls, either. Whenever Merida caught sight of her—in classes, the corridors, the dorms—she’d almost always be with a different set of faces. She seemed to be some sort of social butterfly like that, often seen giggling and chattering with whoever she was with.

She’d even attached herself to Merida’s other roommates, so she couldn’t catch a break there, either. It was why Merida avoided her dorm as often as she could.

How did that girl do it? Couldn’t other people see just how vile she was? Did they even notice?

Merida didn’t know. It made her nervous about her other classmates, not knowing what they cared about or what they thought of her. She hadn’t yet talked to the other two girls in her dorm either, and she wasn’t in a hurry to. Aside from Clary, she…hadn’t talked to anyone, really.

And it might’ve been her imagining it, but sometimes it felt like others were talking about her. She’d turn a corner and hear giggling come trailing behind her. Or she might walk too close to a group and they’d stop talking altogether. Sometimes there would be this strange, pointed itch on the back of her neck like someone was watching her.

It was just one more thing to add to the mess that was her head. She didn’t know where to start with it. There was just so much in there. Confusion, for one. Loneliness, heavy and aching, that grew worse and worse each day. And a hundred other little things to pile onto all that, but most of it boiled down to frustration.

She was frustrated, with herself, with her life, with her family and society and circumstances and the entire planet for abandoning her—

She felt so angry. It poured into everything she thought and felt. It seeped into the corners of her waking life and left her exhausted by sundown. She never knew she could feel like this. How could one person hold so much anger and hurt inside of them and not die from it?

She was supposed to be a happy girl. She’d had so much to be happy for in her life—her archery, her beloved horse, her family, her home—so many things. Sure, she’d get upset or moody every now and then, but everyone did, and she’d always considered herself a more or less happy person.

…There was a part of her (a larger part than she wanted to admit) that wondered if she was being a little too dramatic about all this. It was just boarding school. It was even in the same country. Her parents just wanted her to learn lessons somewhere else, that’s it. She’d already been having lessons for most of her life, so it wasn’t as if that was new.

But that wasn’t the point. For all she cared, they could’ve shipped her off to a land populated entirely by friendly horses and rolling hills and endless forests where all she’d have to do was spend her days exploring and having fun and none of that would’ve mattered because it wasn’t her choice.

She didn’t have any choice. Not really. Not where it mattered. She’d thought she did. She’d believed her parents actually cared about what she thought, that they listened to her when she had something to say. But that wasn’t true.

She’d yelled and pleaded and begged with them to at least compromise with her on this one thing, to just listen to her, and they didn’t care. No one cared about what she wanted because they’d already decided everything for her. And there was nothing she could do to change that.

Her choices didn’t belong to her. Her future didn’t belong to her. And the only thing this English school did was remind her of that fact every time she opened her eyes.

If she thought about it long enough then she didn’t know if she’d break something or cry.

So she didn’t. She pushed all that away. She put her head down and focused on her work and didn’t let herself think about anything else.

That attitude carried her through the week. It completed her homework and caught her up in her classes. The bracelet didn’t come off, but at least by then she’d grown used to it.

The air was cool and windy the day of her first flying lesson. She’d had to miss the actual first one the week before because of her back-logged worked, but that week she got to be outside and on the grounds.

The professor for it was none other than the same one who’d found her earlier. She introduced herself as Madam Greenleaf, and for the first few minutes she went over what they’d learnt the previous class. But then another professor had come by to speak with her and the two had gone off into the forest.

Merida stood next to her broom, idly looking around. Most of the other students had formed their own little groups, be it on the ground or in the air. On the edge of the designated flying field stood a wooden cabin, and beyond that loomed the strange, dark forest.

The professor had said she’d return in a few minutes but was within shouting distance should anyone need help. It’d been long enough for Merida to consider it a decent amount of waiting time.

Although she was from a magical background, Merida had never ridden a broom. The broom on the ground looked innocent enough. It also looked rather flimsy, now that she’d paired it with the thought of carrying her weight. But if one of those could get a grown adult up in the air then surely it wouldn’t have any trouble with her, right?

Merida held her arm above the broom and levelled it a stern look. Listen here, you. I have swung my Da’s sword and it’s bigger than you. I’ve ridden a horse that can make you into wood chips. Do not test me.

“Up!”

The broom shot up.

Merida caught it and gave it a twirl. Huh. That was easy.

The professor had said something about aligning the broom with the ground before riding it, but Merida made the executive decision to figure out the details later. First came flying, then came the rest.

Swinging the business end of the broom past her feet, she gripped the handle. The wood vibrated under her hands, suddenly warm to the touch. Tiny engravings slowly appeared on the surface. They flashed gold before melting back into the wood, and then all at once she felt lighter. Cool air swept from tip to bristle and swirled around her knees.

And then her feet her hovering over the ground.

Merida grinned. She’d done it! She tugged the handle upwards and the broom went higher. Its arc turned into a sideways tilt and Merida did an odd little spin in the air, somehow righting herself before she went upside down.

The coordination took her some time, but soon she was floating about two stories up. The wind brushed through her hair and ruffled her uniform, far gentler than from the back of a horse. But she could make it go as fast, if she wanted to. She knew she could. Maybe even faster.

It was all Merida could do not to go into a giggling fit, she was so happy with herself. Her classmates might’ve thought her strange—or something, she didn’t know—but the least she could do was not appear strange and bonkers where people could see her.

Her practice had taken her a little ways away from the rest of them, closer to the cabin. Movement on the ground caught her eye. On the side of the cabin not facing the flying field sat a small enclosure with fuzzy, dark creatures in it. Three of the Gryffindors huddled next to it.

Merida had flown close enough to clearly see that one of the boys had taken out his wand. He did something with his wand that made the creatures shuffle away from him. He did it again and the creatures started making a high-pitched sound. Meanwhile, his friends laughed.

She didn’t think. She twisted around and pitched her body forward, and the broom went from a hover to a steep dive. Half way there, Merida hooked her heels around the broom handle. She brought herself up to a crouch, took aim, and jumped.

Her foot hit the back of the boy’s head.

Merida rolled on the grass. She came to a stop on her back, the breath knocked out of her. Behind her came squawks and shouts from the boys. She stumbled to her feet and faced them.

The boy she’d hit was surprisingly awake and spitting out blood. He looked up and she saw he had a bloody nose. Between them lay his wand, tiny flames sputtering in the grass around it.

All three stared open mouthed at her. “You…you’re that Slytherin girl.”

Merida’s face twisted into a sneer.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She turned on her heel and made to leave. Then she turned around again and said, to the air at large, “And my accent is fine!”

As Merida started back to the castle, the Gryffindor boys went running to tell their classmates, shouting the entire way. Another thing to further fuel the rumour mills. At that point it probably wouldn’t be worth it to find out what that one would grow into.

She’d get a detention. The first of at least a few others, most likely. Even if she’d been doing well until then, it was hardly fair to think that would last.

But for now, that was a problem for future her.

.°○♧○°.

A/N:

- Most of the trouble I had with this chapter came from trying to describe Merida's mental state. I'm still not sure if I included too much or too little, or if it made sense.

The bottom line of it is this: Merida is mourning. She is mourning the loss of her childhood. She is grieving over reaching the boundaries of her world and realising that she cannot yet cross them. She is realising for the first time that she is a very small person in a very big world and that terrifies her.

As of now she doesn't know where her rage is coming from. It's spread out all over; sometimes it comes upon her and jabs a particular point like a needle prick, other times it feels like a directionless haze. She doesn't realise that underneath it is fear and grief. She is a very strong-willed soul. She wants to know that her mind and her strength are enough to bring about change, and that what she thinks and feels has an impact on the world. Because in a lot of ways, that's what she was raised to believe: the responsibilities of a queen will someday fall on her shoulders and she's been taught that the power she will hold means that what she does, what she thinks, how she talks, how she listens—that alone will hold enough power to rewrite the pages of her country's history.

To find out that her voice is only so strong, that there are so many things about her own life that're out of her control—it makes her feel powerless and hopeless. And that anger in her—it comes from the part of her that's trying to protect her. It sees those sad, hopeless feelings and it lashes out against them. She doesn't know just how much sadness she's feeling under all that hurt, and she's not ready to face those feelings yet. She is lonely, homesick, and hurting. She needs a good, long cry and someone who'll be there to listen to her. She needs a hug.

Merida suppressing her emotions + her not finding a healthy outlet for her feelings + her distancing herself from her classmates + her not keeping track of what kind of things people are telling about her = consequences for later

She's going to hurt for a while, but things will get better and she will make friends who care about her as a person within this fic. Pinky promise.

- I know it should've been obvious, but I only found out recently that there are prejudices faced by the Scots, the Irish, and many others from the UK and Europe who've had their languages and cultures targeted throughout history. And judging by the reactions in the comments section of the things I read, most westerners weren't aware of it either. A part of me from back when I was 12 felt vindictive pleasure here in writing Merida and her home education putting focus on her speaking skills. I used to read fics where Merida's dialogues were written so ridiculously and she was depicted as someone the rest of the characters couldn't understand at all. It made younger me confused and annoyed when in the movie itself she'd only had a slight accent.

I am fully aware that Hogwarts is in Scotland, and it is canon in this fic that about a third of the school is Scottish and Irish. But remember, this is an English institution, not a Scottish one. There are bound to be kids who grew up being taught those kinds of things attending it. If you want the truth, the girls who laughed at Merida didn't really care about that. For them, it merely served as a convenient excuse that they capitalised upon. Also, these prejudiced people? They're real funny. Like, they are so funny. Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that this isn't anywhere near the funniest they can get.

On an entirely unrelated note I'm remembering that princess scene from the Ralph movie by Gisnep, that one particular scene about our princess being "from the other studio". If anyone knows which hilarious individuals green lit that one I'd appreciate it if they were directed my way. I just want to talk. :)

Anyways, that soon-to-be-named girl will get her comeuppance before the school year is up, so you can look forward to that.

- I feel like I've already said this somewhere, but once again the Slytherin House I've written here is different from the canon one, just like the Ravenclaw House I've written is also different. The next Merida POV chapter will elaborate more on this, and I hope it'll be made clearer then.

#rotbtd #merida #Brave (2012) #harry potter #hogwarts #hogwarts au #fanfiction #fanfic #my writing

[sinsdaycorp]

All In.

Supercorp One Shot. Kara confesses a secret - but not the one Lena expects. Also known as: "Gayness and cheesecake and karaoke, Oh my!”

— — — —

The next page was an article on exactly that, written by her new friend Kara Danvers.

A knock on her office door had her setting her tablet down beside her half empty, now stone cold coffee and calling whoever it was in.

"Kara, I was just reading your article," Lena said, smiling brightly as she stood.

"Not worth your time, but this," Kara pulled a hand out from behind her back to show a tray holding a to-go coffee and a white bag. "This is better than a silly article on Supergirl."

"Nonsense.  Your writing is amazing, much better than all the other Supergirl articles."

"I think we've officially said the word 'article' too much," Kara said with a soft laugh.

She took the coffee out of the holder and held it out for Lena as she rounded the desk.

"It does lose its normalcy for a word after a while," Lena said, taking a seat on the couch, gesturing for Kara to join her.  "What's in the bag?"

"Oh!" Kara scrambled to open it up and leaned it towards Lena so she could see into the bag.

"A doughnut and a muffin?"

"One for each of us. You get first choice though."

"Are they both chocolate?"

"That's literally all they had. I'm sorry. If you don't like them I can-"

"Who doesn't like chocolate?" Lena asked with a small laugh, reaching for the doughnut.

The chocolate glaze had started to melt, and the hole that had been used to fill the doughnut with Nutella started to ooze slightly as Lena took a small bite.

"So, what brings you to my office now? Aren't we meeting for lunch later?" Lena asked.

"I-Uh," Kara looked down, setting the bag with the muffin still in it on the small coffee table. "I need to tell you something. And I wanted to tell you sooner, since we grew closer, became best friends-"

"That you're Supergirl?"

Kara seemed to choke on air and stutter as she clenched her fists and avoided looking at Lena.

"Flew here on a bus? Oh Rao? The same piercing eyes and scar between your brows?"

"I-I... Lena."

"I'm not mad, Kara," Lena said, setting the doughnut on the edge of the bag so chocolate didn't get on her table.

She licked her fingers to clean the chocolate off them and used her thumb to wipe the edge of her lips to make sure there wasn't chocolate on her face.

"Not mad? How?" Kara asked.

"Because we've only known each other for a few months, we became fast friends. Then became best friends. You have a secret, and I didn't expect you to come in here ready to tell me today."

"Well, actually, I didn't come to tell you that," Kara said with a nervous chuckle.

"So why did you?"

"I came here to c-come out to you."

"Come out? So, you're not Supergirl?"

"Oh, no, you were totally right about that. I don't want to hide that from you either."

"So, you wanted to come out to me?"

Kara nodded, swallowing audibly.

"Why?"

"Well, my sister suggested I come out to someone I trust, someone like you... Her words. And I said that it should be you, because I trust you, and value you."

"Kara, that's... that's so sweet. So, wait, you haven't even told your cousin? Or your friends?"

"No, only you and Alex."

"And what did Alex say other than to tell me?"

"She laughed and said something about how Eliza would react about us both being gay."

"Eliza, Alex's mother, right?"

Kara nodded, biting the inside of her lower lip.

"Can I ask you something related to Supergirl?"

"Of course, anything."

"Your family, what happened to them?"

"Krypton blew up, so my parents sent me and my cousin in a pod to earth... I got stuck in space for a few years, the blast knocked my pod off course, and when I landed the Danvers adopted me."

"Blew up?"

Kara nodded slowly, reliving the day in her brain, having to feel the blast, looking back and seeing krypton, her home, gone.

"That's terrible, Kara, I'm so sorry." Lena rested her hand on top of Kara's giving it a gentle squeeze. "I can't imagine what that must have been like, living through that."

"Every superhero has a tragic backstory, right?" Kara asked, a tight smile on her lips as she tried to make light of the situation.

"Kara Danvers is my hero just as much as Supergirl is," Lena said softly.

"Lena, that's so sweet. Thank you."

"I do have one other question."

"Shoot."

"Is anything about your powers different from Superman?"

"Not that I'm aware of, apart from my appetite being so much bigger, but the only plus I have is I don't get the monthly monster that other women do."

"Bitch," Lena said with a teasing smile that made Kara's heart flutter.

"So, when did you find out? A-About Supergirl?" Kara asked.

"The second I met her after meeting you, your voice, your smile, the crinkle of your nose."

A knock at the door made Lena's head snap up as her assistant walked in.

"Miss Luthor, your eleven o'clock just cancelled. You're free till one."

"Thank you, Jess. Would you hold my calls, please. I'm going to take my lunch early."

"Of course, Miss Luthor."

The assistant nodded before stepping back out and closing the door behind her.

"Oh, I should have asked. Is that okay with you?"

Kara nodded quickly, pulling her phone from her pocket. "I'll just let Alex know I'm busy."

"Where would you like to go to feed that appetite of yours?"

"Truthfully, I'm craving cheesecake. Can I take you somewhere?"

"Where?"

"I want to fly you to Maine, if that's okay."

"What's in Maine?" Lena asked, reaching for her doughnut.

"A restaurant that's amazing, and has amazing cheesecake," Kara said with a shrug. "Or we can do something here and go another time."

"Maine sounds like a nice change of scenery for lunch. I'm in."

~•~Supercorp~•~

Leaning back slightly in her chair, Lena laughed softly at having heard just how Kara got the scar on her forehead.

"Well, I'm glad to hear you weren't hurt too bad. What did your mother say?"

"She chastised me for chasing the stray dog and said I was lucky the tree branch didn't knock me out or cause any more damage than the minor scrape and forbade me from leaving her side."

"Harsh, but certainly understandable."

Kara adjusted her glasses as the waiter came over to them, clearing her throat before looking up at the man.

"May I interest you in desert?"

"Can I have a slice of plain and a slice of cookies and creme cheesecake, please," Kara said before looking to Lena.

"I'll just have the coffee cake, thank you," Lena said, reaching for her water.

"Certainly, would you like me to bring the bill with them?"

Lena looked to Kara who only shrugged and waved her on to make it her decision.

"Yes please," Lena said before she set her water back down as he walked off.

"How do you know about this place?" Lena asked, watching Kara who just shrugged and smiled.

"I used to sneak out when I first got to the Danvers', sometimes with Alex, other times alone. I took a photo of myself at every border in America next to the state name. Alex is in like ten or twenty of them. The rest of the time I was alone."

"And where ended up being your favourite?"

"Home, no matter how tough life got. Going back to Midvale was always something I looked forward to. Talking to Eliza after a rough day at school was way better than seeing how far I could go on the map and better than ninety-nine percent of the adventures I ever went on."

"Ninety-nine?"

"The trip to Australia was pretty cool, that one I did while I was in college, so I could really take the time to look around."

"How long were you there?" Lena asked, completely invested in learning everything she could about Kara.

They were interrupted by the waiter bringing back their desserts and the cheque.

Once he was gone again, Kara picked their conversation back up.

"I was there for a month. I mostly went to zoos and saw a lot of red dirt when flying over. I have so many pictures. I'll have to show you sometime."

"Sounds like a date... uh, I mean..."

"It's okay, I understand."

"What made you want to come out? Have you got your eye on someone?" Lena asked, changing the subject as her cheeks tinted pink.

Kara took a bite of one of her cheesecakes as she shook her head. "No, I just got sick of hiding it."

"That's understandable. I came out as bi when I was fifteen. Lilian went off her rocker at me."

Kara smiled sadly, but Lena waved it off. "It didn't change anything, I didn't hide who I was despite her asking me to numerous times, on many blind dates."

Kara grimaced and shook her head. "I hate the idea of blind dates. I've only been on two. Alex stopped trying to set me up when I came out as Supergirl."

"That does put a damper on things I assume, always being on call."

Kara nodded, moving on to the second slice of cheesecake.

"How's your cake?" the blonde asked, adjusting her glasses as she looked up at Lena.

"Quite good. Yours?"

"Delicious. Want a bite?" Kara asked, already loading her fork up and holding it out.

Lena leaned forward, mouth wrapping around Kara's fork without a thought before she pulled back and swallowed. "Delicious is an understatement. Scrumptious."

Kara laughed softly and shrugged. "Scrumptious? Been a while since I've heard that word. Are you sure it's real?"

Lena rolled her eyes half heartedly and shook her head gently.

"I believe it is, but who knows anymore?"

"Scrumptious," Kara murmured, chuckling to herself.

Kara's phone started buzzing across the tabletop, and she looked down at it before apologizing to Lena. "It's Alex, it could be important."

Lena waved her on and Kara lifted the phone to her ear.

"Finally, I've been trying to contact you for a full minute," Alex said with a sigh. "We got a burning building that no one can get into. We need you ASAP."

"Text me the location, I'll be there in ten minutes," Kara said before pulling her wallet out. Lena stopped her, already placing money down on the table and standing.

"Let's go," Lena said, ushering Kara out quicker. Once they were completely out of sight, Kara wrapped her arms around Lena and carried her bridal-style through the air as soon as she was in her Supergirl outfit.

Lena lifted her arms to hang around Kara's neck, watching the world whizz by in the blink of an eye.

~•~Supercorp~•~

Kara touched down after putting out the fire with the aid of the fire department, looking through the crowd to see her sister standing there with an unimpressed look.

Kara slowly walked over, putting on a plastered smile as she saw a few cameras and phones pointed towards her.

"What part of always be in contact don't you get?" Alex asked, crossing her arms.

"My earpiece must have slipped out somewhere. I'm sorry, Alex."

Alex just shook her head, frowning. "I shouldn't have let you go out of town. Especially with her."

"Hey, what's your problem? The buildings out, everyone's safe and alive-"

"You shouldn't have told her, Ka-Supergirl."

"I didn't. She figured it out."

#supercorp #supergirl #kara danvers #lena luthor #AllIn #Supercorp Fanfiction #Part 1/3

[the-wlw-cafe]

Forget Me (Not)

Request: #62 Memory loss with Lena Luthor preferably the Reader losing their Memory? They were Dating for awhile but got hurt protecting Lena so now she doesn't remember Lena who decides it's best for her not to remember so that the Reader doesn't get hurt again so Reader goes About their normal life but with Lena basically suffering every time she sees them bc she's still in love with them idk Maybe a happy ending if you wanna

Fandom: Supergirl

Warnings: referenced injuries, some language, being Long as feck

Word Count: too many (3265)

You awoke to the sound of hushed voices. You couldn’t make out what they were saying, every noise seemed to drift towards you through a thick layer of jelly, muffled and warbling. You felt like you were floating. It was the smell that finally clued you in that something was off: It smelt sterile, like hand soap and disinfectant, not like the scent of lavender, coffee and freshly washed sheets that you associated with home. You slowly opened your eyes, blinking against the bright white lights that surrounded you. When you tried to move, you noticed an IV drip sticking out of your arm.

Ah. Hospital.

The voices became clearer, two women, arguing.

“Now you’re just being dramatic, Lena, this isn’t your fault!”

“If it weren’t for me, none of this would have happened. Getting close to me is a risk, you know that, and I’ve been selfish enough to ignore it, but I just can’t anymore. I’m making the right decision here.”

“The only thing you’re making is a big mistake Lena, I know how much – (Y/N)!”

It seems they have noticed that you are awake, and the taller of the two, a blond woman whose face splits into the most sunny smile you’ve ever seen once she makes eye contact with you, comes rushing to your bedside. The smaller one, pale, with dark hair framing an impossibly gorgeous face, stands in the back, clearly left distraught by the argument you’d interrupted. You immediately got the overwhelming urge to reach out and comfort her.

“(Y/N), we’ve been so worried about you, but I knew you were a trooper!”

She immediately goes in for a hug that leaves you stiff and awkward. You have no idea who this is, but they clearly know you very well, which can only mean one thing. But that couldn’t be, things like that were reserved for soap operas only, it didn’t happen in real life...right?

The tall blonde seemed to notice you not returning the embrace, pulling back with a frown.

“Is something wrong? Are you hurt? Oh Rao, did I hug you to hard?” she fretted, a worried crinkle appearing between her brows.

“Oh no, the hug was fine, I just...” you make a helpless flailing motion which leaves your IV drip swinging. “I’m sorry, I’m going to be frank, I have no idea who you are.”

The blonde lifted her hands to her mouth to cover a gasp. “But...but you must recognize Lena, right?” she exclaimed, gesturing towards the other woman. Oh this was bad. You hated to see these people hurt and worried.

“Nope, does not ring a bell.” You replied.

“But she’s-“ the blonde began, only to be cut off by the other, Lena.

“- the one whose building was trapped with the bomb that put you on a coma. I needed to make sure you’d recover, and seeing that you’re awake, I’ll go get a doctor for you”, she said curtly, and gave you a small smile that doesn’t reach her eyes. She’d already turned away before she’d finished the sentence. You and the blonde watched her leave the room.

“Is she okay?” you asked.

“Honestly? I don’t know. She’s going through a lot of stuff at the moment.”

  Lena returned with a doctor not long after, and a series of exhausting questions later you were diagnosed with amnesia. When or whether your memory would return nobody could tell, but you were released two days later with the recommendation of trying to go through your day as it came naturally to you, visit familiar places and not stress yourself out too much over remembering. You felt lost and vulnerable in the apartment that was so unfamiliar to you, yet everyone seemed to recognize as yours. Kara, the blonde woman who had dropped by your bedside multiple times to bring you some fried sugary goodness to offset the horror that was the hospital food volunteered to sleep on your couch until you’d find some semblance of normalcy in her life (“No, really, it’s no problem, Alex – my sister – will look after my plants, and I think they’ll thank her for it, I keep drowning them for some reason...”).

  On your first evening at the place you didn’t remember as home, you went through Kara’s phone together, looking at pictures of her, her friends and you together in the hopes that it would stir something, anything inside you.

You scrolled through pictures of you and her friends at bars, at picnics, at game nights, always laughing and smiling, and still these peoples were strangers to you. All of them, except one.

“That’s Lena! From the hospital!”, you exclaimed, just glad that you had found one face that didn’t make you feel like looking through stock photos of a group of handpicked multiracial attractive models.

You furrowed your brow in thought. “That’s weird, though, she didn’t mention us being close.”

Kara smiled a slightly pained smile, said something along the lines of “well, you met her through me, I was interviewing her for CatCo and things just snowballed from there”, before quickly scrolling on. You see her face popping up in some pictures after that one, but you don’t bring it up again.

  In the following days, Kara took the time to re-introduce you to all of her friends, to her sister Alex, Alex’ girlfriend Maggie to Winn and James, she tried to get a hold of Lena but the CEO declined. It didn’t surprise you, being CEO of L-Corp probably didn’t leave her with much free time. The Superfriends did their best to make you feel welcome in their midst, but you still couldn’t quite shake the feeling that you were hanging out with a group of complete strangers, who somehow knew your favourite drinks, your Noonan’s order, and your preferred board games.

  Kara took you to L-Corp a week after you were released from hospital, since it was there you lost your memory, and per chance you ran into Lena. Kara invited her along to grab coffee together, but with one look at you she blanched, pressed out that she was urgently needed in a meeting from between clenched teeth, turned on her heel and walked right into the room she had left seconds before. It was completely empty.

  You started to get the feeling that Lena didn’t like you.

  The following Saturday, you were proven wrong, she didn’t just dislike you, Lena Luthor outright hated you. It was game night, and you had attended out of a sense of obligation and the fact that you started to grow close to the Superfriends – for the second time from their perspective. Lena arrived late, played one token round of Taboo, and then left immediately after, citing a work emergency. The phone she pretended to talk on was clearly switched off.

  Days turned into weeks, and this became a common occurrence, no matter how much Kara and the others conspired to get you two to talk to each other.

By far the worst thing about this situation was however the fact that you seemed to affect Lena’s friendship to Kara too. You caught them, once, arguing in the kitchen at game night after they had gone to get more wine.

  “Lena, she’s suffering, you’re suffering, and this has to stop. You can’t keep running away from this and honestly I’m not sure how much longer I’m willing to lie for you!”

“Kara Danvers, don’t you dare. Don’t you dare destroy everything I’ve done to-“

“-to make both of you miserable? Lena, open your eyes, this isn’t working! (Y/N) has a right to know –“

You couldn’t take it any longer and decided to announce yourself by clearing your throat. The two women whipped around to face you.

“Sorry”, you began, awkwardly scratching your neck as if you hadn’t just caused a rift between these two friends. “The guys are asking for more beer.”

“Oh, we were just...” Kara started, clearly in the early stages of a trademark ramble.

“...just leaving. I was just leaving.” Lena finished, her gaze fixed on some spot behind you. You didn’t manage to contain your scoff in time. “Another work emergency, I gather? Or what’s the excuse you have for us today?” you said. Lena stumbled backwards as if you had hit her, and immediately you regretted your cold words.

“I...good night, (Y/N).” Her voice broke on your name and you swore you could hear her sniffle as she rushed past you. You stared at Kara, unsure of what had just happened in this kitchen, when you felt a second wave of anger wash over you.

“No”, you growled. Kara looked at you, puzzled.

“No, she doesn’t get to do this. She doesn’t get to avoid me for weeks when I needed her the most, when she should have been there for me like all your other friends...my other friends were! She doesn’t get to make me feel bad about calling her out on her bullshit! I don’t know what I did to offend her, I literally can’t remember, but why can’t she just talk it out with me like a goddamn adult?!”

You braced yourself on the kitchen counter as you stared into the dark night outside. Voicing your anger had felt good, it had been a long time coming, but you’d still do anything to get some closure on this whole situation.

“Oh, (Y/N)”, Kara breathed, looking torn. “Lena doesn’t hate you. She...she’s in a difficult spot right now, and she thinks she’s doing the right thing but she’s really, really not...she’s a very headstrong woman.”

“Yes, feel free to tell me whenever you’re ready to stop talking in riddles and feel like making sense”, you snapped.

“Lena made me promise not to tell a word, and I can’t break her trust like that, but I also can’t stand to see you both so miserable.” Your friend heaved a great sigh, and at this moment she looked older than you had ever seen her. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and after some typing, she presented it to you. “Just...take a look.”

She had opened a folder named Top Secret L  and you actually let out a small giggle at that. Subtlety really didn’t seem to be her strongest suit.

The folder was empty except for a series of four photos, obviously taken in quick succession at a park. The first was Kara, taking a selfie, pointing excitedly at some kissing couple on a park bench. Half of you wanted to sit Kara down for a serious talk about privacy and personal space, the other half just smiles because that’s Kara, the same Kara that had called you one evening after having seen an elderly couple feeding ducks at a pond, squealing “true love exists!”. The second photo is another image of the couple, up close this time, and your heart drops into the general vicinity of your stomach when you recognize the lovebirds. That is, without a doubt, Lena Luthor, one hand in your (H/C) hair, the other at the small of your back. The third picture clearly showed your reaction to being busted, Lena hiding her face in your chest and you throwing your head back with laughter. You couldn’t tell whether the blushes on your faces stem from embarrassment at being caught or from the heated kiss you had been sharing. In the fourth and last picture, Alex was photobombing you, pretending to gouge her eyes out with a cocktail umbrella.

You put the phone down, staring blankly at nothing in particular. You hadn’t expected to be able to feel this photo so vividly, not to remember, but to know how Lena’s soft lips felt on yours, how her scent surrounded you, how you were able to feel her pulse racing out of control...

You were longing for something, for Lena, for a feeling you didn’t remember but missed anyway. You looked up at Kara helplessly, seeking guidance, advice, something.

“Were Lena and I...” you croaked, not trusting your voice to get the whole sentence out.

“An item? Yeah. You even tried to keep it secret from us for a time, but we saw right through you. And by ‘we’ I mean Maggie ‘detecting is my job’ Sawyer”, she added with a soft smile.

You leaned against the counter.

“I imagine you two have a lot to talk through”, Kara said gently.

You nodded absent-mindedly, already working through hundreds of reasons why Lena would not want you to find out you had been in a relationship before the bomb and the memory loss debacle.

Kara grabbed you by the shoulders, gently ushering you towards the door. “Come on, I’ll tell the others where you are. You go get your girl.”

  She texted you Lena’s private address as soon as you were out the door. In the lobby of her apartment building, you saw a security guard immediately lumbering towards you. You cursed inwardly. You had no idea what to say. “Yes, apparently I used to be Lena’s girlfriend until a few weeks ago, but don’t ask me anything personal about her or our relationship, as I have conveniently forgotten it all.”

Before you could even begin to delve into a shakily improvised excuse, he broke out into a wide grin.

“Miss (Y/L/N)! I was wondering when I’d see you again here! It’s been too long! You and Miss Luthor didn’t have a falling out, did you?”

“Something like that”, you murmured, still taken aback by his jovial greeting.

“Well, I know it’s none of my business, but Miss Luthor hasn’t been well in the last weeks. I do hope you’ve come to set her straight.”

“Well, that’s the plan, but we’ll see how it goes”, you reply, showing a shy smile.

“Then by all means, don’t let me keep you here any longer, I’ll let you right up!” he said with a goofy thumbs-up gesture.

Lena lived in the penthouse, so you had plenty of time to come up with something to say to her on the elevator ride. You left the elevator without any semblance of a plan. You took one last, deep breath, steeled yourself and knocked on her door.

There were a few seconds of tense silence, and then –

“Who’s there?”

Even through the door you could tell from her hoarse voice that she’d been crying.

“It’s me, (Y/N). We need to talk.”

Nothing.

“Lena Lutessa Luthor, you open that door right now or so help me I’ll get Kara to throw me in through the window!”

For a moment you thought Lena would refuse to let you in, but then you could hear the tell-tale click of the door as she let you step into her apartment. You tried not to let it take your breath away too much, but you still found yourself slightly distracted by the gorgeous view on the golden lights of National City by night.

“I assume Kara told you, then.”

Lena had her back turned to you, obviously trying to hide her tears from view.

“Kara didn’t technically break her promise to you, she just let me connect the dots”, you said.

“So she didn’t tell you that she thinks I’m a coward and a liar?” she snapped, but you could hear the fright in her voice. She was scared and hurt, and therefore lashing out. And again, something inside you ached to take her in your arms, comfort her, and never let her go.

“Lena, you know Kara would never say these things. She loves you.”

Lena made a strangled sound, somewhere between a scoff and a sob. You decided to press on.

“I just need to know why. Why did you try to hide this from me? Were we...were we unhappy? Did that bomb just come incredibly convenient to you, so you didn’t have to break up with me?”

You were getting worked up again, you couldn’t help it. You deserved better than 3 weeks of the silent treatment, especially when as vulnerable and confused as you had been.

“Did Kara tell you what happened the day you got injured?” Lena asked, her voice almost inaudible.

“Yes, there was a bomb at L-Corp and I got caught in the blast-“

“You shouldn’t even have been there! I received the bomb threat several minutes before the explosion. There was enough time to get every civilian out of the building and to safety. There was enough time for you to be far, far away from any danger. And yet you turned around, and you ran right up to my office, because you just had to make sure I was okay. And when there wasn’t any time left anymore, you tried to shield me from the blast. I saw you get thrown against a wall, (Y/N). I saw you lying there, with broken limbs, not moving, and I thought you were dead! I thought I had lost you!”

Lena whipped around to face you, her face red and tearstained, but there was a grim determination gleaming in her eye.

“I thought you had died because of me. Do you understand now, why I have to do this? I loved you, I still do, but I can’t allow you to throw your life away for me. You deserve more. You deserve someone who can love you without endangering you whenever you’re together.”

“I’m not stupid, Lena”, you reply, after a few seconds. “I knew that when I got into the relationship with you. And I still chose you. And I think...I think I would do it again. Kara showed me the pictures of you and me in the park, I’m not sure if you remember-“

“Of course I do”, she sighed. “It was our first official date. You were actually going for a kiss on the cheek, but, well, so was I, and our lips just awkwardly collided for a moment before things...escalated.”

“Yeah”, you chuckled. “I could see the escalation.”

You swore there was a small smile playing around the corners of Lena’s mouth.

“The thing is, Lena, I felt something when I saw us kissing. I might not remember what we had, and maybe I never will, but I still miss it. I miss us. And maybe, in time, we could rebuild all of this.”

Lena’s mouth dropped open.

“Really? Even after how I’ve treated you? Oh God, how I’ve treated you, I’m so sorry, (Y/N), but I was so scared...”

You interrupted her with a raised hand. “You can’t do this to me again, Lena. You can’t just leave me out of the loop. If we are to have a second chance for...well...us, we need you to be able to trust each other completely. I need you to tell me the truth, always, even if it hurts, even if you’re afraid, and you have to trust me when I say I know what I am getting into.”

Lena nodded frantically, under tears, but she was smiling as well. You weren’t surprised to feel your eyes burn as well. And suddenly, you didn’t know who initiated it, maybe it had been a shared impulse, the two of you closed the distance between each other and fell heavily into each others arms, sobbing tears of relief, joy, loss, fear, a bit of everything.

This would take time, you both knew it, and both of you still had wounds that were a long way from healing, but in this moment you refused to let each other go. This was a path you had to take together, after all.

#supergirl #supergirl imagine #lena luthor #lena luthor imagine #lena luthor x reader #wlw imagine

[nancywheelxr]

ooh, Kara ultimately helping corrupted-Brainy by going into his mind prison?

look,,,, I genuinely tried not make it too sad, I swear

Kara wakes up standing in a hallway.

It has the same clean, futuristic style of the Legion Cruiser, and she is hit with the sudden certainty that yes, this is what the Legion Headquarter looks like in the 31st century. The door in front of her has no visible doorknob for her to turn, only a biometric lock blinking back at her, so she does what people do no matter the century, she knocks.

The hall is empty, stretching in both directions before turning a corner, and eerily silent; a potted plant is at her right, every leaf deathly still– no windows in sight to let any breeze in. Kara still pulls her cape closer, her skin crawling uncomfortably with the awful feeling of being watched. Did Brainy feel like this when he ventured inside her mind?

A rustling noise echoes faintly from her left, and Kara whirls in that direction. She thinks she might have seen a shadow skittering back over the corner, but it’s too quick even for her eyes to properly catch, although she could swear–

“Kara?” His voice snaps her back and– Rao, he looks and sounds and moves like Brainy again, the circles on his forehead blinking blue, skin no longer a sickly, haunted pale. Kara might be tearing up a little with relief, throwing her arms around him and holding on to him for dear life. Brainy hugs her back, just as tightly, uncaring if her tears grow a wet patch on his shirt. “What happened? What’s wrong?”

“You’re you here,” she sniffs, laughing a little without any real humor and refusing to pull back, “I’ve missed you so much and I was so worried, everyone was telling me you were gone and how there wasn’t anything else we could do, but I knew you were still here, somewhere.”

He guides her inside, and she hears the door locking behind them, and the shift in the atmosphere is glaringly noticeable. Here, with a wall between them and whatever had been prowling on that hallway, she feels safe. “What are you talking about?” He asks, pulling away to look into her eyes, a worried frown knitting his brow, “I have been here this whole time, working on…” his frown deepens, and he gestures a device riddled with colorful wires sitting on his table, “working.”

Oh no. Lena had warned her this might have happened. Kara sits him down in one of the stools, settling in the one beside him, gently taking his hands, “Brainy, none of this is real. We’re on your mind.”

“What? No, that’s impossible. I would’ve noticed,” he shakes his head emphatically, “it can’t be. I would have noticed it.”

“How long have you been here, then? What are your working on?” She pushes as kindly as she can manage, voice soft with her sadness. “And how can you be here and not at the DEO? How could I be here?”

This lab is nothing like the ones at the DEO, with its pristine white walls and high ceiling, there are too many bookshelves with perfectly cataloged books and machines that haven’t been invented yet, too clean, too perfectly organized, too many cupboards filled with too many chemicals. And she sees in the way Brainy looks around, eyes widening and clearing out, that he too knows. There’s no mistaking this for anywhere in the 21st Century. His gaze falls back on her. And there’s no Kara Danvers in the 31st Century. “How can it be– I don’t understand. How are you here, then?”

“We’ve put you back in cryosleep, it’s been months now. Something happened,” Kara falters, pausing to gather the courage to tell him the truth. The truth will set you free, right? Even if it hurts a whole lot first? “You were looking into the Fort Rozz files and Indigo– we think she left some sort of virus, somehow it slipped into our servers and stayed there, dormant until–”

“I accidentally triggered it,” Brainy finishes, a somber expression on his face that makes Kara wish she could punch Indigo again. “Did it shut down my body? Is that why I’m asleep?”

“Yes, and no,” she sighs, remembering the weight of the pen drive on her hands that day and how much heavier than the taser it had felt. As heavy as the world. “It did infect you. But it– it took over. You weren’t you anymore, and I– I had no choice, it was using you to do… bad things. I had to knock you out, I couldn’t let it use you like that! So we put you under to buy us a little more time, just until we could figure out a way to cure you.”

Brainy stares down at his hands, a blank, hollowed out look on his eyes, and Kara carefully cradles his face, lifting up his gaze so he only sees her, instead of whatever blood his imagining dripping over his fingers. “I don’t remember, these things you say I did– I don’t even remember. I should– they were right, I’m too dangerous–”

“No!” Kara interrupts him before he spirals too low down a rabbit hole she has no time to follow. She wishes she could let him grieve, but– once he’s awake, then there will be time. “It wasn’t you. You didn’t choose to hurt anyone. You need to know this. It is not your fault. I’m sorry I don’t have– I can’t stay too long. The last time we tried this, we caused a citywide blackout; Lena gave me ten minutes if we’re lucky–”

“How are we here? Cryotechnology isn’t supposed to be invented in another three decades, and the technology to connect our minds shouldn’t exist in this century at all.”

Thankfully bringing this up helps distract him from his guilt, and Kara smiles for the first time in what feels like years, “why are you so surprised? There isn’t much Lena Luthor can’t do when she sets her mind to it.” Her grin softens, as it so often does near him, “besides, she had very good reasons to rush the process. But it’s not nearly as good as the stuff on the Cruiser, it’s using up too much energy. Which is why you need to wake up as soon as possible, it might fail any time now.”

Something scratches at the door– no, not scratching, it’s a scraping sound that grows all around them, coming from the walls, the ceiling, the tiled floor. Kara feels unease building in the pit of her stomach again; nothing like this had happened when they had been on her mind. She watches as Brainy frowns, walking along the walls until he finds a button near the door.

A panel slides open, revealing a large glass window looking out to the hallway, and–

Here’s the thing, when they had been on her mind, Kara had been in a coma. She wasn’t infected with a maliciously hungry virus.

–dozens of bugs crawl on the glass, skittering in and out of view, electronic eyes blinking red and their spindly legs tapping and scraping with a screeching metallic note. 

“Oh my god,” Kara breathes, skin itching with the phantom feeling of insects walking all over her. “This can’t be good.”

“It’s the virus,” Brainy says, hiding the window away again. He stumbles back, almost knocking over a test tube on the way. “They realized I’m aware this is an illusion and are trying to get in. If they do–”

Kara swallows thickly, a sharp pain on her forehead telling her time is running out. She shakes her head, standing up and speaking with all the certainty she holds in her heart, “they won’t. Now you know this isn’t real, you can fight them. Come on, this is your mind, you have the advantage. I know you, Querl Dox. I know you are stronger than any virus. You have to wake up.”

She kisses him, even as she feels this reality dissolving under her fingertips and darkness closing in, pulling her further down like quicksand. “See you on the other side,” she whispers with a smile before pain bursts behind her eyes and she slips away from his mind.

#look an ask #kara danvers #querl dox #brainiac 5 #supergirl fic #karadox #the one where brainy gets corrupted #and we all cry

[shewhowantsmouseears]

The Son Of Scheherazade, 27

Notes: As always, huge thanks to my amazing editors, Drucilla and Blueshifted, the two of them are real geniuses!

Welcome to the second-to-last chapter, hope you like it! Haven't written such a long story in a while, slightly proud.

Summary: Why was the forgotten kingdom lost to time? Why must a genie never cry? And what will it take for Minnie to break? Everything is connected, and everything will be tested.

When the earth swallowed Mickey up, his body decided enough was enough and finally, mercifully, passed out. When his consciousness returned, he couldn't tell how much time had passed, if any had at all. All he could do was lay still, his back touching a cold floor, his body rolling in waves of pain and numbness, back and forth.

It hurt to breathe, it hurt to think, and he knew there'd be no end to it. Minnie was gone, her freedom snatched away, and now she was being abused by her own father. That last fact alone brought a million questions, but he was far too exhausted to concentrate on anything but his own grief. Minnie, Minnie, Minnie - he had to find a way to keep his promise, to get her out of here, to tell her his feelings – his eyes felt wet, but he couldn't even muster the strength to open his eyelids, and allowed his tears to roll down.

Then came a soft touch, gently wiping away his tears with delicate fingers. The touch was warm and familiar, and he longed for his mother now more than -

His eyes suddenly flew open. “Ma!”

Indeed, as his vision cleared, there sat Lady Scheherazade, the weaver of his destiny. Her once beautiful dress was now in rags and filth, her raven dark hair in a tangled mess, and just like his father, there were signs of weak muscle and bags under her eyes. But despite all this, she was still as radiant and beautiful as his birthday, especially when she smiled. “It's wonderful to see you again, my darling child.”

“Ma!” Mickey sputtered again, awash in new tears and relief. For the time all he could was say her maternal title over and over, scrambling to get up and hold her as tightly as his body would allow. Her thin arms wrapped around him, and he could feel the drips of her tears joining his. It felt like an eternity since he last saw his beloved mother, and now she was here, and he never wanted to let her go. He wanted to apologize for being such a spoiled brat, for all the delays it took to save her, for being unable to save her at all, but all he could do was sob like a little boy.

Another pair of arms joined the embrace, and Mickey looked up to see his father around them, and that only made Mickey weep even more. Proud father, dear mother, he loved them more than there were stars in the sky. It felt wrong to be happy in such a terrible situation, yet there was definite joy to be found here, in the glow of family. He was afraid to wake up from this dream – and a loud honk told him otherwise. Blinking, he glanced behind him, to see that this very large cell was occupied by the rest of his crew, the sound having been Goofy blowing his nose into a hanky, overwhelmed at the reunion. The absurdity of it all managed to bring Mickey into the present.

“Um, well, everyone...” Mickey tried to start, sitting awkwardly in his mother's lap. “These are my parents... Sultan Muhtim Algalb of Rao, and Sultana Scheherazade.”

“Kinda figured that out by now,” Daisy said dryly, but it was the only bite she'd allow herself. She then smoothed down her dress, put her hands on her lap, and bowed her head low in reverence, with the rest of the crew following suit. Not only were they in the presence of royalty, but also of a woman whose name had become legendary. The carpet lay uselessly on the ground, and Pluto slowly padded over to his master, whining quietly.

In turn, Al placed a hand on his chest and returned the gesture, with Scheherazade doing the same, speaking as she did. “You have our eternal gratitude, brave ones, for protecting our son and guiding him here. I have watched your noble needs, and could not have entrusted my precious one to any better hands.”

Mickey finally crawled out of his mother's lap, trying to keep his mind and heart steady. “Ma... why didn't you tell me about your All-Seeing-Eye? Why did you make me think all those stories about Sinbad were made up? Did you know what was going to happen with the Phantom Prince?” It was difficult not to spill out a dozen questions at once.

Scheherazade sighed deeply, with Al taking her hand for comfort. “Oh, my child... I wanted to tell you everything ever since you were born. Every day, I planned to... and every day, my fear won out. My gift comes with a terrible price.” She mournfully shared a look with Daisy, who knew all too well the burdens of the talent. “Before I met your father, I couldn't trust anyone. I was so sure that if anyone learned about my Eye, I would be used as a tool or a weapon... or that one day, the Phantom Prince would rise again and find me. Everyone who has the Eye has been afraid of the day he might try to rule once more. For the longest time, I thought I'd be alone, and that I deserved to be alone.”

Mickey balked – not only did this not sound like the confident, happy woman he grew up with, it also sounded startlingly enough like his own thoughts. Scheherazade graced her husband with a grateful smile. “But when I heard about the tragedies happening in Rao... I found the courage to use my gift for good. I thought perhaps I could hide my gift under the guise of storytelling, and as you all know, it worked. I wanted to keep my secret... but I fell in love. And I couldn't hide anything from the man I adored. I told him the truth the day after we married.”

“She wanted to tell the kingdom,” Al continued for her, “But I told her not to. The idea of a woman saving a kingdom with her stories, it brought hope and peace to our land. It made people feel like even the most average person was capable of miracles. Ultimately... my good will only wound up hurting my beloved. She was carrying such a heavy weight on her shoulders, and I was so blind to it, until the day we had you.”

“Me?” Mickey replied a little stupidly, pointing at himself. “What did I have to do with it?”

Scheherazade took Mickey's hands into her own, remembering how small they used to be. “I knew you'd grow up hearing about how I saved our kingdom with my stories, and all the praise I heard every day from everyone about how great and amazing I was... I thought if you knew the truth... you'd be ashamed of me, and perhaps come to hate me.”

Mickey's hands immediately clasped her own, almost angry at such an accusation. “How could you think – Ma, I could never hate you! You're my mother, I'll always love you! And Pa too! You mean the world to me! I'd fight a thousand Phantom Princes if it meant seeing you again!” He might've started crying again, had Goofy not let out another huge honk into his hanky.

Al and Scheherazade shared a touched, grateful look, before Scheherazade pressed her forehead to her son's. “And we'll always love you too, our most important treasure. I loved you from the moment I held your tiny body in my arms. That's why I couldn't bear the thought of your hate...so, instead... I began to loathe myself. Every day, every hour, I was convinced I was a terrible, awful woman, who could lie to her own child. There were days I couldn't even stand to hear my own name.”

Now Mickey was left speechless. Of all the surprising things he'd learned about his mother since he started his journey, hearing that his mother hated herself as deeply as Mickey hated himself was the most stunning of them all. They'd both been bottling up their true feelings out of loyalty to the family, terrified to reveal the truth. In the end, he really was his mother's son, wasn't he? Scheherazade lifted Mickey's hands up to kiss them. “As your birthday began to approach, when you'd finally become a man, I knew I couldn't do it anymore. But I also knew it would take much more than a simple admission for you to believe me. That's why I sought out Sinbad, and why I requested the flying carpet... so I could prove to you that my Eye was real, and that I could show the entire kingdom who I really was. Even if it meant drawing the attention of the Phantom Prince...I wanted to be honest with you.”

“There was no talking her out of it,” Al ended with a tired smile. “There is no one quite as stubborn and wonderful as your mother. And we never gave up hope that you would come for us. She's told me of your quest, of the friends you made and the lives you've saved... we are so proud of you, Mickey.”

Mickey gazed up at the faces of his parents, having finally gotten what he wanted – a right to earn their adoration, having done something besides merely being their blood. He knew he'd done many great things, and wanted little more to bask in this happiness. But he couldn't. His hands curled up, and he began to stand. “There's nothing to be proud of... I came all this way to save you, and here I am, locked up right with you!”

“Mickey, don't!” Donald began to get up, ready to defend his best friend. “We all got tricked!”

“But Minnie's freedom was my responsibility!” Mickey argued back, fists clenched. “I should've kept a better eye on the lamp! I should never have let Pete get near it! I should have... I should have...” Looking back, there were a hundred things he could have done differently. Questioning more why Pete was there, focusing on getting his father to safety, using a wish to just defeat the damned Prince - “This is all my fault!”

As expected, he started to hear the opposite from friends and family, saying that of course it wasn't, he did his best, he was trying – except for Goofy, who was stuffing the wet hanky into a pocket. “Okay, so it's your fault.”

Now that got everyone to shut up at once, thrown off. They were all so mad they didn't know quite how to begin yelling at him, so Goofy took advantage of the silence. “I've been hearing you say that every time you make a mistake, so, I figure, if you say it's your fault, then it is. Mostly 'cause I figure you've been telling yourself that every time and it's not doin' a lick of good, so maybe hearing it from someone else might. The only other person who ever told you to stop that was Minnie, and she needs our help, doesn't she?”

Al glanced at his wife. “And here I thought you were exaggerating about his speeches.”

“They are good ones, my love.”

Mickey blinked once, twice, looked at the ground, and then up. Funny how things looked once you took an outsider's perspective – true, the only one who actually agreed that Mickey bungled this up badly was Minnie, and it was part of why he cared for her so deeply. Forcing open old wounds wasn't going to heal him. He remembered the day he first met the Captain, and how Goofy had essentially forced Mickey to fight for something for the first time. Perhaps Scheherazade had thought her son would learn from Sinbad's stories, but only when he met the man in the flesh had any lessons been taught. “You're... you're right, Goofy. I don't like how things ended up... but that doesn't mean this is the end of anything. We're going to break out of here, and we're going to save Minnie!”

“How're you going to do that if you can't even save yourselves?”

Everyone had been so absorbed in the confrontation that they failed to realize the latest guest in their crowd. There, standing in front of the thick black bars stood Pete, proudly smirking down at the prisoners. “Aw, sorry, was I interrupting a monologue?”

“YOU!” Mickey's anger roared with a hot vengeance, and he launched himself at the bars, clawing like a wild animal, trying grab any part of Pete to make him Pete. “How could you do this us?! Were you with him the entire time?!”

“Took you long enough to figure it out,” Pete sneered, arms crossed, still holding onto the sword he stole from Mickey. “You were supposed to be taken away with your parents on your birthday... but your mama went and messed it all up. So the Phantom Prince yanked me away to be a spy.”

“We took you in as one of our own!” Al objected, on his feet with everyone else, swinging a fist into the air. “How could you betray us like this? We gave you everything! Clothing, food, money, a roof over your head... you had our trust!”

“It's your own fault for thinking you can trust anyone!” Pete scoffed, head held high. “You knew I was rotten the moment you laid eyes on me, but you still went ahead and let me in. If anyone's to blame, it's Scheherazade! She thought she was so great, she could turn anyone into anything she wanted! All I've ever been to you was a pet project!”

“I never saw you that way.” Scheherazade was the only one who didn't speak with flames on her tongue, instead resting her hand on Mickey's shoulder in a futile effort to draw him back. “Pete... I took you in because I pitied you.”

Pete had been ready to fire off another hurtful remark, except he hadn't prepared for this revelation. He choked, lacking the proper vocabulary to rightfully word his question. “You... you what?”

“Of course I knew you were a bad seed from a badder family. With my Eye, how could I not? But the world had already seen fit to judge you and prevent you from ever being more than what you came from. If things continued that way, you would have been a prisoner of your own making. I felt sorry for you... and I thought if someone came to you with a hand of friendship for the first time, you might see things another way. I didn't take you in because I loved myself so much... I took you in because I hated myself so deeply, that I needed to make it right by someone else.”

The former adviser was a large hefty man, but after hearing that admission, he appeared to shrink down several times. He opened his mouth but nothing came out. A weird feeling was twinging in his gut, one he'd never felt before, so he had no chance of recognizing it as guilt. As far as he knew, it was indigestion. He knew all along that the royal rulers were naive and foolish, but this was – how could anyone actually care about him? How could she even say such a thing after all he'd done? He – He was better than everyone, smarter than everyone... wasn't he? The twinging feeling became stronger, and it was also on his hip -

Which alerted him to the fact Mickey was inches away from yanking his sword back. All at once, his villainous urges returned. “Back off, brat!” He drew the blade across Mickey's arm, cutting him deeply, and Mickey launched himself backwards, clutching his injury. He landed in his mother's embrace, who cried out his name, and his father let out a serious of dark expletives about Pete's future. Pete's heart beat hard – he didn't feel like looking at their faces anymore. “I... I'm getting a whole kingdom out of this deal! What do I need your pity for? I'll have power, and nothing's more important than that!” He turned on his heel, trying to believe the words he just said. He deserved the kingdom, and he was going to prove it, somehow.

He heard Mickey yelling his name off in the distance, and continued to hear it even when he left the dungeon. He had a bad feeling he'd be hearing it in his sleep.

~*~

The dungeon was housed underneath the palace, and it was a steady walk back up to the golden rooms. By that time, Pete had settled his nerves, and was ready to demand that the Phantom Prince send him back to Rao so he could begin his reign. He walked right to the throne room, threw open the doors -

And had a vase thrown right over his head, smashing to the floor behind him.

He stared at nothing, then looked behind him to confirm it happened, before the scene in front of him properly registered. The Phantom Prince was laying out maps and texts, ready to restart his kingdom, and Minnie was making this very difficult. She was ripping the maps, throwing the books, trying to flip the table, and then launching herself at the Prince, trying to bite and punch and kick her back to the lamp. Every time she got close to him, the Prince merely grabbed her by the arm and threw her away like a ragdoll. She'd get up within seconds, ready to start all over, and the once proud, regal throne room now appeared incredibly shabby due to this back and forth fight.

“What's going on here?!” Pete asked, stupefied, having expected Minnie to be a broken doll that had lost all hope. “She's like a wild animal! Do something about it, wish her to stop!”

Minnie turned around as she heard him - “You, this is your fault!” - and picked up a stray lit candle to throw. “Mickey's going to break out of that dungeon, and you're both going to pay!”

Yes, it would have been easy to give in to the grief of her returned memories – to be lost in the sands of time as she remembered her dear aunt, her doting grandfather, and a father that saw her only as a tool. Part of her wanted to lay down and die as she knew she'd been the very weapon that took the lives of her family. Despite all this, there were still gaps in her memory, ones she both wanted and didn't want to get back. The biggest gap was what happened after she was forced to get rid of her aunt and grandfather, and before she was found by a new master out in the desert.

These things mattered – but not as much as her loved ones who were still alive and still fighting. If they weren't going to give up, why should she? Mickey made her a promise, and he was going to keep it. In turn, she'd do everything in her power to help them and help herself. She was running out of projectiles, and settled for her body, charging at Pete and chomping down on his arm. He yelped, and frantically tried to pull her off. “Knock it off, you little brat!”

“Let her fight,” the Phantom Prince said dismissively. “It will do her no good. One day, that fire will burn out, and she'll be the perfect pawn again.” In fact, for his plans, it'd probably be for the best that she wasn't devoid of hope yet. The first time he had her power, he'd made a fatal error, and he wasn't eager to do it again. “I'll begin making the portal for your return home, but I need quiet and concentration. Go take her outside or something.”

“What is she, a doberman?!” Pete managed to pry her off, and tried to hold her off at an arm's distance. “You're her master, act like it! If I had the lamp, I'd have her treat me like a king!” What was this idiot thinking? He kept his powerful foes alive, and now he had the entire world in a lamp and was taking his time with it! It was just as Pete thought all along, he truly was the smartest person alive.

“Don't speak of matters you don't understand,” the Phantom Prince growled, growing impatient. “I gave you an order, so follow it! I am about to restore my kingdom, and unless you literally want to be one of its building blocks, you'll do as I say!” With that “settled”, he turned his back towards Pete, and began to work on the portal, willing a black orb into his palms. Once the nuisance was gone, he'd begin real work on his kingdom. He could simply wish Pete back to the kingdom, but it was best to let Minnie work out her anger on someone. Pete would make a suitable punching bag.

As long as she didn't cry, everything would be right.

Pete glared hard at the Prince's back, before leaving the room and slamming the doors behind him. He dragged Minnie along, who clawed at his hand and kept going on and on about how Mickey would free her, Mickey would defeat him, Mickey was unstoppable, Mickey Mickey Mickey – he was getting sick of hearing that name! He made it a few feet into the hallway before the last of his tolerance died. “Will you shut up already?” he snapped, throwing Minnie to the floor. “He's never going to defeat the Phantom Prince!”

“Yes, he will!” Minnie stood up, fists clenched, ready to attack again. “Mickey won't give up! My so-called father is nothing compared to the amazing things Mickey has done! And when he breaks free, he'll make sure you never hurt anyone ever again!” They would win, they would finish the story! Everything in her believed this, and there wasn't anything that could change it. Mickey could do anything if he put his heart and soul into it, and when it came to defeating evil and helping those he cared for, he was invincible! “Mickey is more of a man than you'll ever be!”

Pete ground his teeth, annoyed and, reluctantly, impressed. She'd been told her father took her soul as an ingredient, and she was able to move on like it was yesterday's news. If that didn't break her into submission, what would? A broken servant was the best servant, Pete was sure of this, and he had to prove it. He had to prove all the pain and suffering he went through was worth it. His fingers twitched at his side, lightly brushing by Mickey's blade, the sword dangling loosely from his belt.

He stopped – and then the idea came to him. A wicked, evil idea, one that would do just the trick. If this didn't force Minnie into obedience, nothing would. It was the best idea he ever had, and the sign he deserved the kingdom. He inhaled, then exhaled, with a victorious grin on his face. “You don't understand, little miss. He's never going to defeat the Phantom Prince... after all, a corpse can't fight.”

The word didn't hit Minnie right away. She'd been about to charge forward again, but her feet paused in place, and she blinked once. “What?” Clearly she misheard.

Pete held out the sword, lightly tapping the bloodied mark he'd made from Mickey's arm. “I got rid of the Son of Scheherazade, and all it took was one blow! He went out wailing for his mama!” He laughed darkly, a hand on his belly. “He couldn't even put up a decent fight!”

Minnie's eyes stayed on the sword, on the rich red that stared back at her. Pete was lying. He had to be. Of course he was. “You... The Phantom Prince, he... he needs him alive...”

“For what? To make Scheherazade work for him? What do we need him when we have you?” Pete sneered, using the sword to lightly tilt Minnie's chin up. “We can just wish her to use her Eye for us! Shoot, we don't need any of them anymore. They're just target practice, is all!”

No, no, no, no, Pete was lying, had to be lying, the smell of the blood was fresh, lying lying lying had to be lying, “Mickey... is a fighter, he... wouldn't...” She couldn't tear her eyes off the sword, that was Mickey's sword, Mickey wasn't dead, no, couldn't be, no no no -

“Don't you two have some stupid promise about your wishes?” Pete was more than happy to remind her. “That when its cast, he feels it too? He was way too exhausted to fight me off! In one way, you could say... it's your fault he's dead!”

Minnie stopped breathing.

“After all, if he hadn't found you, we would still need him to make Scheherazade obey us.”

I'm not expecting anything, I just wanna help! ... My name's Mickey.

“And then you had to go and make him feel sorry for you, so he made that dumb wish so he could share your pain.”

Maybe... maybe there's a chance I won't be a good person when that time comes. In that case, there's only one thing I can do.

“You had to go and fill his head with ideas about love and freedom, and look where it landed him.”

So no matter how badly I want to kiss you, or tell you things, or anything... I can't do it until I set you free. Do you understand?

“You killed your family, and now you killed your boyfriend. What a shame! Maybe if you just kept your trap shut, it'd save everyone a world of trouble.”

Even so... I just... I have to hear it once the shackles come off, and you're... just you.

“Maybe this time, you'll learn your lesson.” Pete patted Minnie's head as if she was nothing but a disciplined pet. “Now, you feel like walking back in there and helping us out?” There, done and done, just as he knew it would work! Now the Phantom Prince would finally treat him with respect! Now the Sultan and Sultana would see that Pete was superior to all them, and he never needed any pity!

But Minnie didn't hear him. She could only hear Mickey's voice. She could only hear the last words he said to her.

Don't give up! I'll free you, I promise! I PROMISE!

Pete was right, in a sense. There was only so much a person could take before they utterly snapped. And Minnie was hearing those words over and over again in her brain, I promise, I promise, I promise, HE WAS DEAD, HE WAS DEAD AND IT WAS HER FAULT, SHE KILLED HIM, I PROMISE, I PROMISE, I PROMISE, SHE NEVER TOLD HIM HOW SHE FELT, DEAD, I PROMISE, DEAD, I PROMISE, DEAD LIKE AUNTIE DEAD LIKE GRANDFATHER DEAD LIKE EVERYONE IN THE KINGDOM I PROMISE -

Minnie drew a breath... and then screamed.

~*~

Mere seconds ago, the Phantom Prince was working on the portal, which was going to take longer than he cared for. He didn't want to admit to Pete that Mickey and Minnie were right, his power was waning. All the energy spent to find henchmen like Pete, the Glooms, Lotus Blossom, creating the heartless monsters, keeping the palace restored, it was all killing him. He had lasted centuries, but his time was running out. He needed to make his mark in history, to be remembered as the rightful ruler, that was all that mattered.

So long as Minnie didn't cry again, all would be well. He thought erasing her memories of him as her father would keep her in check, but who knew that killing two people would send her over the edge? The result of that destroyed his physical body, and only last minute magic kept him alive. She had destroyed the whole kingdom, keeping them a secret for the ages. But it was fine, now things could go back to the way they should have been all along. He was, in fact, so confident over this that he didn't have any plan prepared if such a thing would happen again. But of course it wouldn't! Back-up plans were for fools, and he was a genius. He just needed a little more time...

That's when he heard her screaming. That's when he felt the ground shake. That's when he knew Pete had done something incredibly foolish.

“NO!” Abandoning the unfinished orb, he held the lamp in his hands and ran for the doors, and he saw his worst nightmares realized. Minnie was clutching her head, eyes blank, body shaking – and she was about to cry. “STOP! STOP IT NOW! DON'T YOU DARE!”

Pete was oblivious to the Phantom's panic, and had yet to notice the small earth tremors. “What's the big deal? Let her get it out of her system, then she's as good as done.”

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” The Phantom Prince grabbed a fistful of Pete's shirt, forcing him close. “Don't you remember the rules of the genie?! She must never cry!”

“Since when have you been so sentimental?” What a bizarre thing to get worked up over, especially from the father who abused his daughter.

“YOU BUFFOON, IT'S NOT ABOUT SENTIMENTALITY!” The Phantom shook Pete so hard he quickly saw stars. “A normal body can't support that much magic, I had to store it somewhere! I placed all her magic in her tears!”

Only now did it dawn on Pete that perhaps he had done something incorrectly. “Uh... huh. So, when she cries... what happens to all the magic that's in them...?” This wasn't going to end well for him at all, was it?

“It's pure uncontrollable magic! It's the most dangerous thing in the entire world! Nothing can stop it! And when it's unleashed-”

He didn't need to go into a description, as they both were about to get a very loud, explosive demonstration – the first tear had slid down on her cheek – and then -

It splattered out into a million hard, dangerous shards of ice, stabbing the walls and pinning Pete to the wall by his clothes. The ground then began to shake much more violently, and with each tear came a new terror – a volcano's eruption melting the floor, a horde of dragons ripping off the ceiling, a tidal wave smashing down the walls, a hurricane spiraling around the dead kingdom and picking up the pieces, it created monsters and hail and floods and beasts, and it didn't stop. Destruction took a hundred different forms to rip the palace apart, and spreading out into the abandoned land. The Imp's imaginings had been nothing compared to this apocalypse unleashed upon the land. Through it all, Minnie screamed, screamed, screamed for Mickey.

She couldn't see, couldn't hear, the world was dead to her, dead as Mickey, her Mickey, it was all worthless now, let everything burn, this pain would never end, and her heart would always be in agony.

The lamp grew hot, hotter than the driest desert in the Sahara, and the Phantom Prince had no choice but to drop it as he and Pete scrambled to find a place that was safe. But there was no safe place, and as Pete stupidly gazed up at the whirlwind of fire and blood, he saw that this time, maybe there would be no safe place ever again. At this rate, her power would rip through the surface of the earth and kill everything in its path.

Maybe he did deserve that pity after all.

#disney #fanfic #the son of scheherazade #mickey mouse #minnie mouse

[argyle-s]

THE SHAPE OF THINGS TO COME CHAPTER 28/38

Rating: Mature

Read at Ao3

Start at the Beginning

Leslie airs her annual 'Things I’m Not Grateful For' segment.

Author’s Note:   Early Chapter today, because I have an 8:30 AM appointment.  Also,  I don't usually specifically ask for comments, but in this case, I'm going to make an exception. I am super excited to finally post this chapter. A *lot* went into this chapter, and it's really close to my heart. I would really love to know what you guys think, so even if you don't normally, please consider leaving a comment, or dropping me an ask or message letting me know what you think.

Thanks to @ifourmindbeso for her great work as a beta. Any remaining mistakes are entirely my own.

Chapter 28 - The First Law of Rao

“I wish I could stay longer,” Kara said as she hugged Astra tightly.

“I understand, Little One,” Astra said. “I am happy for you. It’s good that you have family here.”

Kara let her go, so she could step back and look her in the eye. “You are a part of that family, Astra.” She said. “And soon, you’ll be able to join us.”

“I keep warning you not to get your hopes up,” Astra said. “If your President honors her word about my followers, I will be content.”

“I won’t be,” Kara said. “/.ukiemodh w rraop , eh ,astruh,/”

“/.ukiem w rrip , eh shed kir./ Now, go, be with your family.”

Kara gave Astra one last hug, before she headed back into the main DEO facility.

“How’s your Aunt?” J’onn asked as Kara walked into the conference room.

“Still expecting to spend the rest of her life in a cage,” Kara said as she took a seat across from J’onn at the table.

“We’re working as fast as we can, Miss Danvers,” J’onn said.

“I know,” Kara said. “I just wish she could come home with me for the Holiday. For that matter, I wish you’d consider coming to Thanksgiving Dinner too.”

“Someone’s got to mind the store while you and Alex are gone,” J’onn said. “Besides, I don’t think Eliza would be happy to see me.”

“She would be once she knows the truth,” Kara said.

“You’re going to tell her everything” J’onn asked.

“No,” Kara said. “For the same reasons I’m not going to tell Kal.”

J’onn nodded, but before he could say anything, the video screen on the wall turned on, and President Marsdin appeared.

“Good morning,” she said.

“Madam President,” J’onn and Kara both replied.

Marsdin shifted her gaze to Supergirl. “I have to tell you, Supergirl. You are making a *lot* of waves on Capitol Hill right now. Half of Congress loves you, and the other half wants to shoot you back into space.”

“Well, Cat always says, if you don’t make at least one politician a day hate you, it’s not worth getting out of bed.” Kara said.

Marsdin laughed. “Anything you want to tell me about what I should be expecting next?”

“The Maxwell Lord situation is probably going to get really ugly once people have had a chance to read the Planet and the Tribune,” Kara said.

“Wonderful,” Marsdin deadpanned. “You do know he has something like forty billion dollars in government contracts right now?”

Kara shrugged. “Next time, maybe make sure you’re not hiring a sociopathic murderer?”

“I’ll take it under advisement.” She turned to J’onn. “Director Henshaw, how are our guests doing?”

“They’ve settled into the temporary accommodations fairly well, though most of them had to double up, since we got a lot more than we expected. We’re working on trying to find a more permanent housing solution, but until we have official word on how we’re going to handle their status, we can’t put anything solid into effect.”

“Understandable,” Marsdin said. “That’s actually what this call is about. I’d like you to put together a list for me of all the DEO’s current prisoners who you would consider to be safe for integration into the general population. Anyone whose only real crime is being an alien, or who only committed crimes necessary to survive as an alien on Earth. Also, any prisoners whose original sentence in Fort Rozz has been served, and hasn’t committed any serious crimes on Earth. Add to that list General In-Ze and anyone she vouches for. Supergirl, you’ll need to countersign for anyone on General In-Ze’s list.”

“So, we’re really going to put them out on the streets?” J’onn asked.

“The ones who aren’t a threat,” Marsdin said. “As for the rest, we’re going to start trying to integrate them into the legal system. I’ll be assigning a federal prosecutor to review their cases. We’ll be setting up a special court to try them for their crimes, and sentences will include time already served.”

“If you do that, the DEO will have to go public,” J’onn said.

“I think it’s past time for that, don’t you, Director Henshaw?”

J’onn looked over at Kara, then back at the screen. “It would make our jobs a lot easier,” he said.

“Can I make a suggestion?” Kara said.

“I’d be surprised if you didn’t” Marsdin said.

“Assign Lucy Lane to the DEO to help us get the evidence in order for the Federal Prosecutors,” Kara said.

“General Lane’s daughter?” Marsdin asked.

“Yes,” Kara said.

“That seems an odd choice,” Marsdin said.

“Not really. First, she already knows my civilian identity,” Kara said. “Considering that she’s Lois Lane’s sister, and is involved with James Olsen, it seemed reasonable that she could keep that a secret. Secondly, she’s an amazing lawyer, with an impeccable record. Third, the fact that she *is* Sam Lane’s daughter will help deflect any criticism that you’re going soft on the aliens.”

“You know, Supergirl, sometimes it’s a little scary how comfortable you are with political maneuvering.”

“I spent the last year working for Cat Grant. What did you expect?”

“Based on her previous assistants, ulcers, premature gray hair, and severe anxiety.”

Kara laughed. “There are benefits to a Kryptonian physiology,” she said.

“I’m sure.”

“How quickly do you want the list, Madam President?” J’onn asked.

“I’ll be signing the Alien Amnesty Act first thing Monday morning. I’d like the first stack of Pardons ready for signature at that time. But I do want to be clear. Many of the pardons will be contingent on a period of public service.”

“Understood,” J’onn said.

“Are you okay with that, Supergirl?” Marsdin asked.

“As long as it’s service and not slavery, Madam President. They have to be free to have real lives.”

“That’s a fair concern,” Marsdin said. “As much as I wish it wasn’t. But I promise you, we’ll make sure it’s not too burdensome.”

“Thank you. I-“

The rest of Kara’s statement was cut off by the containment breach alarm. Kara didn’t wait for J’onn or Marsdin to say anything, she just went.

“Hey,” Kara said as she flew in through the window of her apartment.

“Finally!” Alex said.

“Sorry I’m late. One of the prisoners got loose. Butchest woman I’ve ever seen,” Kara said.

“That’s your excuse?” Alex asked.

“Um, that and I was talking to the President,” Kara said.

Alex sighed and looked over at the Cabinet where her Johnny Walker usually lived. “Why did you get rid of my Scotch?”

Kara laughed. “Because you should not come out to Eliza while you’re drunk,” she said.

“You know, maybe I should wait. I mean-“

“Alex,” Kara said, taking her by the shoulders, “you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, you know that, right?”

Alex nodded.

“Good,” Kara said. “But think about what kissing Maggie felt like, and tell me, do you have any doubts?”

Alex watched the smile spread across her face, watched as her whole body shifted, like a weight had been taken off her shoulders.

“Okay,” Kara said, “That’s what I’m talking about when I said sometimes it hurt to look at the two of you.”

“I’m sorry,” Alex said.

“No,” Kara said as she pulled Alex into a hug. “Don’t ever be sorry. Just make sure you don’t even let Maggie go.”

There was a knock at the door, and Kara took a deep breath, remembering how poorly this visit went the first time around, and determined to not let this particular piece of history repeat itself. She let go of Alex and walked over, doing a quick x-ray check to make sure no one else could see the door before she opened it.

“Eliza!” Kara sound.

“My girls!” Eliza said. “Oh, my best, favorite wonderful girls!” She pulled Kara into a hug, and Kara hugged her back carefully. “Alex, come here,” Eliza said, pulling Alex into the hug as well, before she let them go and stepped back.

“It’s so good to be here. And you both look so great.” Eliza gave her a once over and Kara had to fight not to roll her eyes a little bit. “You always looked great in blue,” Eliza said before turning to Alex. “And you look a little tired sweetie. Is the lab keeping you busy?”

“No,” Kara said, bouncing on her feet. “She looks tired because she woke me up at three am and spent hours going on about how great her date last night was.”

“Kara!” Alex yelled.

“You had a date?” Eliza asked in an excited tone.

“She totally had a date,” Kara said, smiling at the increasingly red color of Alex’s face.

“You… You, rat!”

“Alex,” Eliza said.

“You’re totally getting rice pudding instead of cake for your next birthday!”

“What? No! That’s evil!” Kara protested.

“Girls!” Eliza yelled.

“Lady Kara,” Konex said, making Alex and Eliza both jump as he decloaked.

“Yes, Konex?” Kara said.

“I think you’ll want to hear this,” the robot said. A moment later, Leslie Willis’s voice sounded through the apartment.

“It is time for my annual list of Things I Am Not Grateful For, and this year’s list only has one item. Supergirl. The blue and red abscessed tooth in the otherwise gleaming smile that is National City.

“How much do I despise, I mean loathe, her whole, ‘Look at me, I’m adorkable’ thing. It’s such an act, and anybody can see through it, because the moment it’s convenient for her, she switched to that whole ‘I’m alien Jesus, come to cure cancer and save kittens!’ thing. And all that religious crap. ‘Rao light your way’. Please, like she’s going to church on Sunday. She’s nothing but a media whore, just desperate for attention.

“And that hideous, like, rejected from the Olympics figure skating outfit she wears.

“I mean, a skirt and tights? Puh-lease. Seems like overkill, especially since no one is trying to get in there. And who would that be? You know, who’s Hombre enough to puncture the Chastity Belt of Steel? Or is it a softer touch that’s required? I mean, she does give of kind of a Sapphic Vibe, with that big ol’ butch ‘S’ on her chest plate. I mean, how would that even work with an alien? I mean, is everything the same down there, or are we talking tentacles? Maybe it’s time for a break, or a makeover.”

Kara signed and reached up, pinching the bridge of her nose. “How long ago, Konex?”

“I was playing it on a thirty second delay from live, Lady Kara,” Konex said.

Kara looked up at Eliza. “I’m sorry, I’ve got to go to work.”

“What?” Alex said, a look of pure panic on her face.

“I shouldn’t be long,” Kara said walking over to the window and lifting off.

A small, tiny part of Kara had hoped Leslie wouldn’t mouth off about her this time around, because she’d been much less of a hot mess as a hero her first few weeks, because of the charity efforts, and the public support of the Alien Amnesty Act. Except it has only seemed to make the attack worse by giving Leslie more ammunition. On the other hand, she’d already decided how she was going to deal with this, if the time came, so Supergirl landed on the same Balcony on the forty-second floor she used when she was making a public showing of visiting the social media team and walked through the office wearing what she thought of as her ‘Pissed off Aunt Astra’ face as she walked over towards the elevator.

She had a brief moment to notice Winn’s eyes get big, but she ignored him as she walked towards the elevators. She did see him reach for his phone as the doors started to close, but she just ignored it. She had bigger fish to fry. Or keep from getting fried by a freak lightning accident, as the case may be. She just punched the button for the thirty-second floor. The whole way down, she worked on making sure she had her game face on.

The elevator dinged, and the doors opened. For the first few steps, no one noticed Kara, but then someone did, and the “oh shit!” almost made her break character and smile, but she just took another step forward, remembering her purpose.

She could hear Leslie, even though the ostensibly sound-proofed booth. The woman had moved on to making jokes about the fact that Johnny Depp had apparently put on some weight. She kept up the string of fat jokes, uninterrupted, right up until the moment Kara opened the door, and walked into her studio.

“I mean, it’s no wonder there are rumors-“ Whatever Leslie was going to was lost as she looked up to see Kara standing in the door. There was a long moment of silence, before Leslie started to speak again. “Now this is interesting,” She said. “You guys are never going to believe this, but the so called ‘Girl of Steel’ herself just walked into my studio, and oh, gosh, by the look on her face, I think I might have made her mad.”

Kara shook her head as she walked over and picked up a headset, dropping into the chair across from Leslie.

“You really aren’t afraid of anything, are you,” she asked.

“I’m afraid the bar on the corner will stop carrying my favorite beer,” she said. “I’m afraid of getting a traumatic brain injury so bad I develop your sense of fashion. Though I will say, as hideous as that outfit is, it’s not as bad as the ‘underwear on the outside’ thing your cousin used to do.” Leslie leaned forward. “So, why you here, Supergirl? Come to ask for an apology?”

“Yes,” Kara said, “I have.”

“Oh? Did I hurt your widdle feelings?”

Kara caught a bit of movement out of the corner of her eye, and turned to see Cat standing outside the studio, a look of pure terror on her face. She ignored her and turned back to Leslie.

“No, Miss Willis. I’m here to tell you to apologize to all the people you did hurt this morning.”

“Who would-“

Kara slapped her hand down on the table so hard it sounded like a gunshot went off in the studio, and both Leslie and Cat flinched.

“I am talking now, Miss Willis.”

“I have stood toe-to-toe with one of the most feared assassins in the galaxy, faced down a General who once commanded armies capable of conquering entire worlds, negotiated with Presidents and Captains of Industry. I’ve walked the halls of governments that existed when the height of human technology was mud huts and chipped stone knives. I’ve stood on more worlds than I can count. I’ve passed through the Tannhäuser Gate, drifted in the Phantom Zone, and been to the Vanishing Point, Miss Willis. You want to insult me? Go ahead. I’m a big girl. I can take it.

“But this morning, you implied that my being gay was something to be ashamed of and that hurt people. It hurt little girls who are just starting to figure out that maybe they’re never going to like boys the way their friends do. It hurt little boys whose hearts start to race when they see that one special boy at school. It hurt young women in college who’ve just started dating their roommate, or men who are picking out their wedding cake.”

“You mocked my faith, like it’s a joke, and that hurt all the people out there who do go to church on Sunday, or Synagogue on Friday evening, or to the Mosque, or a temple, or a shrine. I don’t go to church, Miss Willis, because all the Temples of Rao are ash, scattered across a star system two thousand light years away, but how many people are going to hear what you said and feel embarrassed or ashamed of the fact that they find comfort in the Bible, the Torah, the Quran, the Vedas, the teaching of Buddha, or the Tao De Ching.”

“You make your living on insults, cynicism and casual cruelty. So go ahead. Insult me. Mock me. You aren’t the first, and you certainly won’t be the last. But don’t you ever turn me into an instrument to bludgeon people with your bigotry, just to score cheap laughs.” Kara turned and looked at Cat through the window. “I think we’re done here,” she said. Then she took off the headset, stood up, and walked out of the studio.

Cat took a step towards her, but Kara held up her hand.

“I expected better,” Kara said. Then she turned and walked towards a door that led to a public balcony. She leapt into the sky, without saying another word.

From TMZ.com

National City’s Superhero Is Supergay!

11/23/2015 9:23 AM PST

Supergirl, the National City Superhero who’s been making so many headlines the past few weeks outed herself this morning on National Radio. In a tense on air confrontation with CatCo Shock-Jock Leslie Willis, the Superhero confirmed the radio host’s speculation that she’s gay.

The confrontation began when Willis’s ‘Things I’m Not Grateful For’ segment, a Thanksgiving staple for the show, focused entirely on Supergirl. The noted Shock-Jock, and long-time host on the CatCo family of Radio Stations insulted everything from the Girl of Steel’s public demeanor to her costume, but what prompted the Girl of Steel to walk into Willis’s studio to confront the radio personality were insinuations made about Supergirl’s sexuality.

The Maid of Might showed a bit of temper when Willis tried to interrupt her, shutting up the radio personality before going on to lecture her about how her remarks were hurtful to the gay community, and demanding an apology.

After the shocking incident, two questions remain. One, is National City, or the nation at large ready for a gay superhero, and two, does this spell the end of the cozy media deal between Supergirl and Cat Grant?

Only time will tell.

Kara did a few laps around the city, burning off some of the excess energy she felt before heading back to the apartment. Venting a bit at Leslie hadn’t taken nearly as much out of her as the three words she’d thrown in Cat’s face. The declaration had surprised her. It had slipped out, a bit of resentment she didn’t even realize was there and even though her first impulse was to find Cat and apologize, it would be doing both of them a disservice because the anger was justified. She did expect this Cat to be better than her Cat, because she’d worked so hard to make it so, and she was angry that it had taken this for Cat to realize how toxic something like Leslie’s show was.

At the same time, she felt guilty because she wasn’t the same beacon of innocence and hope that she’d been in the original timeline. She was doing everything she could to inspire people, to show them how to be better, but there was a lot of play acting involved. A lot of cynical manipulation of the media and politics. There were back room deals and underhanded moves, and a whole lot of ‘The Ends Justify the Means,’ and the one person she would normally go do with this sort of dilemma, her moral compass, was Cat Grant. One of the people she couldn’t go to.

So, instead, she headed back to the apartment, to Eliza and Alex, hoping that a day with her family would sooth away the tension and stress the confrontation with Cat hand brought on.

Alex was up off the couch before Kara’s feet hit the ground, and Eliza was barely a step behind her.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

Kara pulled her into a hug. “I’m fine,” she said. “But Maggie might not ever speak to me again.”

“What?” Alex asked as she stepped back.

“She loves Leslie’s show and I think I might have just gotten her fired.”

“I don’t know about that,” Alex said. “Leslie just handed CatCo a huge scoop. Supergirl comes out on air. That’s gotta be a ratings boost, right?”

“What?” Kara asked.

“Sweetie, you did realize what you said, right?” Eliza asked.

Kara thought about it for a moment, then groaned. “/.,rao, i dovrrosh/ Konex?”

“Yes, Lady Kara?”

“What do the Social Media Feeds look like?”

“I believe the best description would be ‘like a bomb went off’,” Konex said.

Kara reached into the pocket in her boot and pulled out her phone. Sure enough, there were at least a dozen texts from Winn, one from Cat, and 23 missed calls.

“Who has it?” she asked the robot, only for the robot to rattle off a list of every major celebrity gossip sight on the planet, including CatCo and the Daily Planet’s people section.

“I’m sorry,” she said to Alex and Eliza. “I made a mess. I’m gonna have to go fix it.”

Alex, for a moment, looked ready to rebel, but then she took a deep breath, and nodded. “Go,” she said.

“Are you sure?” Kara asked.

Alex nodded. “Go be Kara Danvers for a bit.”

“I love you,” Kara said, hugging Alex. She turned and hugged Eliza. “You too.”

“Take care, sweetheart.”

Kara did a fast change into her work clothes, then headed for the door.

Alex took a deep breath as she watched the door close behind Kara, then turned around to face Eliza.

“Go ahead and say it,” she said. “I can hear you thinking it.”

“How could you let all this happen?” Eliza said. “How could you let her put on that cape? Let her put herself out there?”

“You mean let her save lives? Let her help push through the Alien Amnesty Act? Let her help thirty of her people, including her Aunt, one of her only two living relatives, get back on the right side of the law? How could I do that?”

“Alex-“

“No, Mom. Kara has done amazing things the last few weeks. Things I didn’t even know she was capable of.”

“I know, and I’m proud of her, but she’s put herself in danger.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” Alex asked, feeling a knot in her gut. “Every time she puts on that suit, every time she goes out there, I am afraid for her. I’m afraid somebody who can hurt her is going to come after her. And I have to watch it, every day. But, Mom, she went out there, she put herself out there, to save me. If it hadn’t been for her, I would have died.”

“Alex-“

“There was a bomb. On the plane, there was a bomb. The engine didn’t just fail. And if Kara hadn’t shown up when she did, everyone on that plane would have died.”

“Sweetie, I never would have wanted her to let that happen, but after-“

“She’d been planning this,” Alex said. “For a long time, she’d been planning this. And she wants this. It makes her happy. It makes her feel like she’s living up to who she was supposed to be. You haven’t been here. You haven’t seen what she’s like when she wears that suit. Haven’t watched her talk with her Aunt or seen her argue with the President of the United States like it was nothing.”

“I love you, mom. I do, but you’re wrong. This is who Kara was meant to be. What Kara was meant to be. And the world needs her, which is great, but I don’t even care about that. All I care about, is that Kara needs to be Supergirl. She needs to help people. Humans, aliens. She needs to help all of them. It’s the only way she’s ever going to feel whole.”

“You don’t understand how much danger she’s in,” Eliza said.

Alex opened her mouth to answer but stopped and held up her hand. “No. We’re not going to have the rest of this conversation right now. When Kara gets back, we’ll finish talking, because there are things you need to know.”

“What do you think Kara can tell me that will make me feel any different?” Eliza asked.

“A lot,” Alex said.

The elevator opened on the forty-second floor of CatCo and Kara walked out into a storm of activity. Padme looked up at the sound of the doors, and Kara could hear her sigh of relief across the room

“Oh, thank God,” she said. “How do you want to handle this?”

“Have Konex run the responses and pull anything I need to see, then send it to my wall. Keep an eye on the comments, and make sure the auto-moderation is keeping everything clean. I need to go through my texts and voice mail, then I’ll start composing an official statement.”

“Right,” Padme said. “Um… Miss Grant asked us to let her know if we could reach you.”

“I’ll call her once I’ve finished checking my messages,” she said.

“Right.”

“Winn?” Kara called.

“Yes?” Winn said.

“Comfort food?”

“Pizza and potstickers already ordered. There are four pints of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate chip cookie dough in the freezer with your name on it.”

“You’re the best,” she said. A quick burst of super-speed and she was at her desk, Ben & Jerry’s in hand, and going through her messages. The texts from Winn were all of the ‘Cat Grant is on the war path, please come save us’ variety. She deleted them. The voice mails were all people trying to reach Supergirl for an official comment. She deleted them. Then she looked at the message from Cat.

‘Please let Supergirl know I’m sorry about what happened this morning and tell her she was right. She has every reason to expect me to do better than this. Also, let her know I’d like to speak with her in person when she feels like she can, but I will understand if she needs some time.’

Kara typed out a quick response. ‘I spoke with her. She said to let you know that she’s sorry for her behavior. She was angry at what Leslie had done. She’ll be by to see you as soon as she can get free.’ She hit send, then picked up the remote and turned around, turning on her media wall.

There were a string of supportive statements from GLAAD, The Human Rights Campaign, NOH8, The Trevor Project, and a long list of others. Out and The Advocate seemed to be competing for the ‘playing it cool’ award, while Curve looked to be having a complete meltdown. The number of marriage proposals in the comments sections on Curve, AfterEllen and Autostraddle were both flattering and slightly disturbing.

A number of religious organizations had also responded. Some thanking her for calling out Leslie’s behavior. Some condemning her for “condoning sexual deviance.” Some doing both in the same breath.

The political sites weren’t a lot better about making up their minds.

Reddit and 4chan were the same old cess pools. The Supergirl and Superman forums on both had degenerated into flame wars between people who supported her, and people who hated her. There were demands on both for Superman to condemn her behavior, along with other, less savory things.

Leslie Willis’ fans all wanted to crucify her or toss her back into space.

In short, the internet was the internet, and parts of it made her question her faith in humanity. By the time she was done, someone had deposited two large Hawaiian Pizzas and four family sized orders of pot stickers on her desk. She reached for her keyboard, determined to get this out of the way so she could get back to Alex and Eliza.

From Facebook

Supergirl Zor-El

Monday, November 23rd, 2015

I will admit, I’m not entirely sure where to begin. If you’re reading this, you are probably already aware of what occurred this morning on the Leslie Willis show. I suppose the first thing I should do is apologize for making a fool of myself. Those who know me well will tell you that I am slow to anger, which is a good thing when you can do the sorts of things that Kryptonians are capable of. They will also tell you that, on the rare occasions I do lose my temper, I can make rash decisions. Entering Miss Willis’s studio without invitation this morning was one of those decisions and I feel I should apologize to Cat Grant for abusing the trust she placed in me when she granted me access to the CatCo building.

The people who took me in, who taught me human manners and customs, would also say I owe Miss Willis an apology for interrupting her show. I suspect I might get an earful when I see them next, because I will not apologize to her. What Leslie Willis did today was wrong, on multiple levels.

There will be those who read what I am about to say and decry me as a “Social Justice Warrior” or other such titles which are meant to shut up or dismiss those who call out the poor behavior of the privileged members of society. This is not addressed to them. They have made up their minds, and no amount of arguing will change it, or make them understand what it’s like to be a member of a marginalized community.

I am a refugee. I am an alien. I am a lesbian.

I am one of the lucky ones. I can walk among you, the blonde-haired, blue-eyed American Ideal. Camouflaged by my species’ similarity to your own and by an accident of genetics. I can speak your language, whatever that may be, due to the technological gifts of my people which allowed the computer on my ship to load them directly into my brain on my long journey from the ashes of my home to the safety of yours. I can stand alone, and hide my sexuality with simple silence, because you will see my feminine appearance, and assume my heterosexuality unless I correct you.

I am one of the lucky ones, because I can hide all the things about myself that would make people hate me without even knowing me.

I am one of the lucky ones, because I can pass, if I choose too.

There are others who aren’t so lucky. Aliens with horns, silver gray skin, gills, three fingered hands. Butch lesbians. Femme gay men. Transgender people who are still mid-transition, or who simply don’t pass and never will. Those who can’t hide what they are.

I don’t want to condemn those who choose to pass. I know the safety to be found in the closet. I stayed there for twelve years after I arrived here, because I stepped out once and someone I loved died because of it. Died protecting me, because there are those out there who hated me for an accident of birth. I have a friend who was outed as a lesbian to her parents at fifteen. They tossed her aside like garbage and haven’t spoken a word to her in over a decade and a half.

There is safety in hiding. Safety in anonymity.

But I am not hiding anymore. I chose to put on my family’s coat of arms. To stand up, because it is the responsibility of the strong to protect the weak.

Among those of Jewish faith, there is a concept, referred to as “Tikkun Olam”. The phrase translates into English roughly as Repairing the World. It is the idea that each person has a responsibility to leave the world a better place than they found it. On Krypton, we call this idea “/.kaopahdh rraop w tiv aorghahs ni waila/” The closest translation in English is “You must make the universe whole.” It is commonly referred to as “The First Law of Rao” and is one of the core tenets taught by the Church of Rao. It exists at the heart of who Kryptonians are as a people.

This is why I chose to become Supergirl. This is why I acted as I did this morning. This is why I will not apologize to Leslie Willis.

Her words, chosen to demean me, to humiliate me, to reduce me, did none of those things. I long to be of worth, to prove my value, but Leslie Willis has never sacrificed for me, never suffered deprivation so that I would not. Leslie Willis may judge me all she wants, but she has not earned the right to have me care what her opinion is.

But there are those out there who were damaged by her words. Children and adults who would hear them, and feel shame for who they are, for who they love, for the god they worship, or that they worship at all. Children and adults who will be exposed to others who will take her words to heart, and believe that being gay, or having faith is something to mock a person for or hate a person for.

Words have power. They divide us, separate us, break the bonds of love, fellowship and family. Words turn blood against blood, friend against friend, nation against nation, and species against species.

I could not and would not let her use me to be the instrument to drive those words into the hearts and minds of the people listening.

I have a responsibility, to myself, to my family, to the people of Earth, and to Father Rao to leave this world a better place than I found it, which is why I walked into that studio today and why I will never apologize for interrupting Leslie Willis. Because she needed to be interrupted. Because this city, this nation, and everyone within the sound of her voice needed to hear someone stand up and say, “this is wrong.”

Some will ask if I meant to come out today. If I meant to reveal my sexuality, or if I let it slip in the heat of the moment. To my everlasting shame, the answer is the latter.

The reason I did not intend to reveal my sexuality is not because I am ashamed of it, but because it invites questions I did not want to answer. When I sat down with Cat Grant a few weeks ago, one of the questions she asked was if I had anyone in my life. I agreed to answer her only if she would not publish my response. Several years ago, I began a relationship with a woman who became as dear to me as any family I’ve ever had. Like so many people I’ve cared about, her life was cut short. I lost her in September of last year. I did not want to talk about it, because it was personal. Because it seemed disrespectful to the memory of what we shared during those years for her to be rolled into the bottomless font of tragedy that is the loss of my birth world.

But one thing I know about my beautiful, wonderful Captain is that if she were here today, she would have walked into that studio, punched Leslie Willis in the face, and spent the rest of the show telling everyone who listened to be proud of who they are. To love the people they want to love. And that all the hot girls should call in and give her their phone numbers.

Because it would make me laugh and love her all the more.

She would also kick my ass so hard for keeping silent that I wouldn’t be able to sit for a week.

So, yes.

I am a refugee.

I am an alien.

And I am a lesbian.

To everyone who needs to hear it, you are not alone.

May Rao Light Your Way.

Kara landed on Cat’s balcony after using a bit of X-ray vision to confirm Cat was actually in her office. She was still a little nervous about this. Not quite sure how she wanted the conversation to go. But she’d spent almost two hours working on the facebook post, typing at normal speed, considering her thoughts, crying a bit over Sara near the end. She’d cross posted to Google+, Tumblr and to Instagram with a picture of a White Canary, though no one would ever get the reference, and tweeted a link to the Facebook post. Konex would handle the comment moderation, which was for the best, because the mood she was in she might kill anyone who said anything bad about Sara. Then she’d sat and fidgeted for half an hour, before finally getting up the nerve to talk to Cat.

She gently tapped on the door, almost hoping Cat wouldn’t hear her, but Cat turned immediately, and was on her feet before Kara could lose her nerve.

Kara backed away from the door and took a seat on one of the couches. Cat followed her, dropping down on the other couch.

“I’m sorry,” Kara said.

“No,” Cat said. “You were right. I should have done better. By you and by Leslie. I should have pushed her, held her to a higher standard. Instead, the more awful she was, the more I rewarded her. I turned her into a monster, because the monster got better ratings. Made more money. I forgot who I wanted to be. I forgot what I wanted CatCo to be. You reminded me of that today, and I should thank you.”

Kara smiled, feeling light for the first time since Konex started playing Leslie’s broadcast. “Thank you, Cat.”

“I read what you wrote,” she said. “Your Captain… She was a lucky woman.”

Kara shook her head. “She wouldn’t say so.” She closed her eyes, picturing Sara in her suit, all white leather, snap batons ready for battle. “She was like me. Someone who’d lost everything. Her home, her family, her whole world.” She opened her eyes, looking at Cat and trying to hold back the tears. “We’d known each other on and off for years. I was sitting in a bar, doing tequila shots, drinking guy after guy under the table. Miserable, lonely, wanting nothing more than to curl up and wallow in my grief. And Sara walked right up to me, took the shot out of my hand, and threw it back like it was water. Then she looked at the glass and said, ‘Looks like you need a drink.’ I laughed. It was so ridiculous, and I just laughed, and she looked at me, and said, ‘There’s the girl I know.’ I don’t even know why I kissed her. I just… needed to feel something, and when I kissed her, I didn’t feel alone anymore.

“It was a rough time, but when we were together, I didn’t hurt as much. She would let me grieve when I needed too, but she would never let me wallow.”

“She sounds like she was special,” Cat said.

“Losing her… It was hard.”

“What happened to her?” Cat asked.

“She was a soldier,” Kara said. “She went on a mission. I knew… We both knew before she left, she wasn’t coming back. And I couldn’t tell anyone about it. Not for the longest time, until I’d just held it inside so long, talking about it seemed wrong.”

She took a deep breath to steady herself, then stood up. “I should go,” she said.

Cat caught her wrist before she could lift off. “I bought out Leslie’s contract,” she said. “I can’t stop anyone else from hiring her, but I promise you, there won’t ever be anything like her show on CatCo’s radio stations again.”

Kara smiled down at Cat, and turned her wrist in Cat’s grip, forcing her hand open. Kara caught it in her own, and bent down as she lifted up Cat’s hand, brushing her lips over the knuckles.

“Thank you,” she said, “for doing better.”

She let go of Cat’s hand and took to the sky.

Notes: Translated from the Kryptonian:

.ukiemodh w rraop , eh ,astruh, I love you, Astra

.ukiem w rrip , eh shed kir I love you, Little One

.,rao, i dovrrosh Literal: “Rao's Shadow” Semantic: “Oh, hell”

.kaopahdh rraop w tiv aorghahs ni waila You must make the universe whole.

#supergirl #supercat #supercanary #sanvers #fanfiction #the shape of things to come #kara danvers #alex danvers #cat grant #maggie sawyer #sara lance #j'onn j'onzz #susan vasquez #lois lane #clark kent #james olsen #winn schott jr. #future shock

[supervalor]

All The Stars - Chapter One

Title: All The Stars

Pairings: Karamel, eventual AgentReign, Guardiancorp.

Chapter: 1/?

Next: 2, 3, 4

Summary:

Season 3 Divergence. Based off my other fic ‘Kismet’ with season 3 elements thrown in and a few other twists. 

Shortly after Mon-El is forced to leave Earth, leaving Kara heartbroken, she discovers that she’s pregnant with his child. To complicate matters, Mon-El eventually returns with a wife in tow and a dark Kryptonian emerges to terrorise National City.

Will the two of them ever get their happy ending when the odds have always seemed stacked against them? Especially with a battle on the horizon and the stakes higher than ever?

Chapter One

Kara floated in the sky with her eyes closed, her ears carefully peeled for the sounds of cries for help or sirens blaring in the busy traffic of National City.

Soothed by the warm night air and the distant sounds coming from far below, Kara found herself dozing off without realising. Images filled her mind and she found herself standing in a beautiful, green field with Saturn hovering in the sky overheard. It was a beautiful scenery and she suddenly forgot everything that she had left behind on Earth as she reached out to touch the long golden grains of wheat that swayed in the soft breeze amongst the strands of grass beside her.

Suddenly warm breath on her neck caused her to still and she slowly turned and gazed up into Mon-El’s loving, warmth filled eyes as he smiled at her. Her breath caught as she wondered how he was here with her…and then she wondered why she was questioning it instead of savouring his presence. It didn’t matter that he looked different than when she saw him last. Kara knew it was really him somehow. When he leaned in an inch closer to her, Kara couldn’t help but move towards him, closing the last remaining bit of space between them.

He stroked her face and his eyes hungrily drunk her in as if he was a thirsty man stuck in the desert that had found a drink of water for the first time in months. Kara’s eyes latched onto his lips, hoping that he would kiss her. It had been far too long…over a month for her, since she had felt those lips against hers. It had been a long lonely month and she wanted nothing more for Mon-El…real or fake, to kiss her. Mon-El didn’t disappoint. He pressed his lips against hers and she immediately latched on, her own mouth moving in time with his as if they were dancing a tango.

With his hands around her waist and Kara’s locked on his shoulders, she didn’t imagine that there was any place in the universe that she would rather be right now. She was home. When he eventually pulled away, he pressed his head against hers as if he couldn’t bare for there to be even a single inch of distance between them and smiled at her, his eyes filled with promise as they searched her blue ones. Where this was, it was paradise and she never wanted to leave.

Suddenly something caught her attention from the corner of her eye and both of them looked up to see a person in front of them in the distance…a woman in a blue dress. Kara’s attention was immediately diverted from Mon-El and she dropped her hold on him to walk towards the woman, her heart hammering in her chest. It couldn’t be…it was impossible. She walked forwards and then the woman turned around causing Kara to walk on in a daze, shock all over her face. The dark haired woman, there was no mistaking it for anyone else, it was her mother.

Her mother smiled at her warmly as she got close and suddenly Kara wasn’t sure what to do. She looked behind her to see Mon-El also smiling as though he was getting to watch a long awaited reunion. She stared at him for a moment before turning back to her mother who was still smiling at her daughter as though she had been waiting a long time to see her…and maybe she had. Kara held her mother’s head in her hands so that she could inspect that she was really real, her eyes filling with emotion and longing as she realised that the woman was really her mother and she was touching her, not just a mere hologram or AI of her created by the DEO.

Kara put her arms around her mother to hug her, closing her eyes as she felt her embrace her back right away. She had missed her so much. She couldn’t believe that she was seeing her now. Whatever was happening didn’t matter. She was with two of the people that she loved most in the world and missed with her whole heart. If she had somehow died and gone into the light of Rao then that was completely fine with her.

She felt Mon-El approach from behind her and suddenly it was like she was being yanked back to reality.

Kara opened her eyes and realised with disappointment that she had been dreaming. She was in her Supergirl uniform floating mid-air and listening to the traffic and the sounds of the city around her. Kara had been waiting for innocent people to need her help so that she could save them and keep busy, pretending like her heart wasn’t shattered into a million pieces.

At the sound of hearing a police chase going on downtown, Kara flew from the sky and went after the truck that carried the armed criminals away from the cars that hunted them down. She quickly dispersed them of their weapons, stopped the truck from hitting innocent drivers and then left them for the police – Maggie, who was with Alex - to arrest before going on to her next save, not even catching her breath or stopping to talk to her sister or her fiancé.

The next few days consisted of Alex trying to track her down and convince her to get more involved in the wedding planning but Kara couldn’t muster up even a little bit of energy to pretend to be interested. She was glad that her sister was happy but no matter how hard she tried, Kara couldn’t bring herself to feel any happiness for her sister. Why would she want to help plan a wedding when she was trying her best to ignore the hurt of losing the man she loved? Supergirl had no time to stop and grieve for what she had lost, not when the world needed her and Alex’s wedding...well it would force her to face things she’d really rather not.

Everyone from Alex and Winn to James and Lena were trying to reach out to her but Kara Danvers…well she was liability. Kara Danvers could no longer truly exist outside of Supergirl. She was the side of Kara that would have tempted her to risk the world for the person she loved and she wasn’t human enough to be willing to make that kind of sacrifice for one person, no matter how much she loved them. Clark was more human than she was, not willing to choose Lois over the world. But Kara had done what needed to be done and had accepted that her human side was something that would only get in the way of being a hero.

Eventually Alex grew tired of Kara’s distance and confronted her after she heard from James that Kara had quit Catco in her latest attempt to give up on her humanity. “You quit?!” She demanded after storming in Kara’s apartment while she was working on her laptop with a cup of coffee beside it at the table.

She looked up at her sister expressionless. “James has been making the rounds”, she stated flatly.

“He’s worried about you. I’m extremely worried about you.  Since when do you quit?!”

“Catco isn’t the point for me anymore”, Kara responded causing Alex to stare at her incredulously.

“You spent years working your way up to be a reporter!”

“And it was a waste of time”, Kara sipped her tea nonchalantly as though quitting her job out of nowhere was not a big deal.

Alex scoffed. “I would love to see you tell Cat Grant that”.

“Cat moved on, why can’t I?”

“Okay. This is done”, her sister shook her head in disgust and walked past Kara further into the apartment. “I am done walking on eggshells”, she declared as someone who had run out of patience. “Okay, we all are!” Kara huffed and covered her face with her hands as though this entire conversation was boring her. “I’ve kept my distance. I have given you time to grieve without prodding, without making you talk about Mon-El-“

The minute his name was mentioned it was as though a switch was flipped and Kara immediately spun around, her temper flaring. “There’s nothing to talk about!” she snapped, hoping that Alex would drop the subject. The last thing she wanted to talk to anyone about was Mon-El. Even just thinking of his name caused a stabbing pain to hit her in the chest. She didn’t want to feel that right now.

“Without forcing you to go to game nights”, Alex continued as though her sister hadn’t interrupted and Kara glared at her. “Or come to the bar”.

“There was a burglary”, she retorted in disbelief.

Alex didn’t accept the excuse for a minute. “There’s always a burglary!” Kara fell silent, her eyes mutinous. “But I have let it slide. You’re pity party has gone uninterrupted”.

The blonde Danvers looked at her older sister as though she had been slapped. “My pity party? My pity party?”

“Who are you right now?” Alex demanded accusingly. “Kara Danvers doesn’t quit”.

“She quits the things that aren’t important”, Kara stood up and headed over to the fridge with Alex following right behind her.

“Catco is important, you help people there”.

“Not like Supergirl does”, Kara reached into the fridge just for something to do.

“Kara Danvers-“

She spun around, slamming the fridge door shut and cut Alex off before she could get going. “Kara Danvers SUCKS right now!” Kara felt her voice break and wondered if her sister had caught it. She ignored it and continued. “Supergirl is great! Supergirl saved the world! So if I could chose to be her, why would I ever chose to be the sad girl whose boyfriend is gone? I don’t like that girl Alex”.

Alex’s pitying expression only made her angrier. “Look I know it hurts-“

Kara recoiled when she tried to step forwards to hug her. “No! You don’t know anything! You’ve never had to make a decision like this!”

“Okay then tell me what it feels like? Please?!”

She looked away not wanting to see the hurt in Alex’s eyes, not when she was hurting more than she ever could right now. The last thing Kara needed was to make Alex feel better by suffering through the pain for no reason when she knew that nothing would ever make it better for her. No amount of words would ever or could ever make Alex understand right now. Her stomach lurched and Kara knew that she needed to put an end to this conversation before she felt worst.

“Just let me help you get over him!”

Kara’s gaze snapped up at Alex’s words, her nausea suddenly forgotten as her frustration rose up again and overshadowed everything else. “Get over him?”

Alex seemed to realise her mistake right away as she winced. “That’s not-“

“He didn’t dump me”, Kara pointed out coolly. “I sent him away and for all I know he’s-“just the thought of Mon-El possibly being lost forever or worse made her want to be sick again.

“What?”

“Doesn’t matter”, Kara walked away, deciding that now was the time to put an end to this conversation once and for all. She wasn’t doing this to herself and she wouldn’t allow Alex to force her.

“You’re not letting yourself feel anything”, Alex said as Kara busied her hands by putting things back away in her fridge. “You’re just bottling it up inside and making bad decisions. And I’m worried-“

She had heard enough. “If it was Maggie what would you be doing?” she bit out, turning around to face Alex again. “If the woman you are about to marry was gone forever, what would you be doing?”

Alex looked away and tried to stammer out an answer. “I-“

“You would be at the bar every night” Kara finished for her coldly. “You’d be a wreck at work.  You’d be broken”. Alex stared at her sister, tears gleaming in her brown eyes.

“I would”, she agreed nodding. “I would be. And it’s okay if you are”.

“I’m not”. Kara stared emotionlessly at her sister. “That’s what humans do and I’m better than that”. She moved away from her sister and began to clear up her dining table. “Clark said it himself. The decision I made, he couldn’t have made that sacrifice”. She was sure Clark had meant to be complimenting her or trying to make her feel better but his words had cut her in a way that she kept trying to ignore. Hence why she was trying to get Alex to drop the subject. She could feel her barriers breaking with each word and she needed them to stay together. It was vital that they held up and kept everyone at bay before it was too late. “But me? I couldn’t have lived with myself if I hadn’t. I will always make the decision I made. I am not a human.  I tried to be but I’m not. Kara Danvers was a mistake”.

Alex looked at her sister, distraught. She couldn’t really think that, could she?

“So if you have an update about work I’d love to hear it” Kara continued as though the last few minutes and conversation had never even happened. “Otherwise…” which was a clear dismissal when Alex heard one.

Alex coolly obliged her sister and gave her an update regarding Bloodsport. Before she left, however, she turned and shot some parting words at her, hoping that they would sink in. “Kara Danvers is my favourite person. She’s saved me more times than Supergirl ever could so just think about that while you’re trying to get rid of her”.

As she tried to ignore her sister walking out the door, Kara felt her stomach stir again as though she wanted to be sick. She wasn’t sure if it was that entire conversation or just Alex’s parting shot but she suddenly felt like she needed to lie down for a while.

The next morning Kara actually managed to wake up before her alarm went off. Her stomach suddenly lurched and she felt like she was really going to be sick this time. She tried to super speed but that made it worse and as soon as she made it to the toilet the entire contents of the previous night’s dinner came back up. She stared at the sick as it floated around the toilet in shock and horror. She had actually been sick. Kara had never been physically sick before besides from the time she burnt out her powers and was human for a day.

“Okay now is not the time to lose my powers”, she told herself firmly as if that would prevent that from happening.

As if she had a choice.

Kara tried to push back the panic and ignore it. She had to have control or else everything would fall apart. Everything. The Supergirl statue unveiling was today and she had to be there to make sure that no nukes went off and killed everybody. If she lost her powers she would be completely useless and then she’d be forced to face what Alex had tried to shove right at her last night. Kara wasn’t prepared for that. Not yet.

After a few minutes, her stomach settled and she felt better. By now Kara had convinced herself that the whole being sick thing was a fluke and was due to stress. She had been feeling ill the night before but that was also down to stress. Alex confronting her with that entire conversation had caused her to be physically sick with anxiety. That had to be it. Kara deliberately ignored the fact that it was probably extremely unlikely for her body – even at its most stressed – to exhibit such physical symptoms.

She pushed the entire episode out of her mind and dressed in her Supergirl costume, meeting J’onn on a rooftop close by to the unveiling. Kara personally really didn’t need or want a statue of herself but she supposed it was better than the time everyone hated her for a while.  Kara allowed J’onn to begin talking to her and then she found that it was impossible to keep her carefully built walls up. When he told her that she was ‘the strongest person he knew’ her walls were quick to crumble. “You saved me, remember. Kara Danvers, not Supergirl”, he told her reminding her of a time when he was still mourning his own losses. It was impossible to argue with J’onn like she had with Alex knowing that he actually did understand what she had gone through.

However their conversation was interrupted when everything went to hell within seconds. The nuke began to go off and an Earthquake like movement began tearing the ground apart, creating chaos amongst the crowd that had come to watch the unveiling. Quickly Kara began to search for the nuke and when she realised that it was underwater, she wasted no time in going under. However the nuke had been cloaked pretty deeply under and she was still trying to listen for it when she began to run out of air. Her eyes shut as she began to lose consciousness and she wondered maybe if she slept now she would finally be reunited with Mon-El.

His face flashed in front of her eyes but it wasn’t the serene, peaceful smile he had been showing to her in her dreams. He looked serious and grim faced. “Wake up!” he yelled at her and Kara’s eyes immediately flung open as she remembered that she was under the water.  She finally managed to track the nuke and she quickly carried it from under the river and flew it up into the air, away from where it would hurt thousands of civilians.

After it was done, Kara felt the world around her suddenly begin to spin. She felt dizzy and was alarmed when she began to fall.  Rao, I’m losing my powers, what’s happening? She wondered as she panicked but was too faint, too tired to do anything. Luckily J’onn realised that she was falling and flew up in his Martian form to catch her and flew her back to the DEO unconscious.

“What happened to her?” Alex questioned, panicked filling her voice. It didn’t matter that she and Kara had argued, all she cared about was her sister’s health.

“I’m not sure. She was fine one minute and then the next she fell from the sky like she’d just fainted”, J’onn told her as Alex began to grab various bits of alien based medical equipment to use on her sister.

“I need to check how much sunlight her body’s absorbing”, Alex rushed out as she used what looked like a small scanner someone would use in a Wal-Mart and scanned it over Kara’s body. “That’s strange, the readings are completely normal. Her body’s absorbed the usual amount of sun so she should be in perfect health. Kryptonians don’t get sick, not unless something is interfering with their powers but Kara’s powers are fine as far as I can tell”.

“Why’d she faint though?” Winn asked as he strode into the room with a tablet in hand. “I saw the entire thing from the cameras. She did not look good”.

“I’ll have to do a blood test”, Alex sighed. “But I don’t know how to safely draw blood without using Kryptonite”.

“You don’t need to”, Winn smirked smugly. “I created a synthetic red solar powered lamp for emergencies such as these. Red sunlight should make her powerless and you’ll be able to prick her skin for blood”.

“Bring it here then”, J’onn commanded and Winn quickly scattered under orders. He returned shortly with a small machine on wheels that he pushed into the room and placed beside Kara’s bed. He pulled up a screen and when he turned the machine on, the screen lit up red and cast a glow over Kara.

“You should be able to take some blood now”.

Alex grabbed a syringe and as soon as she injected it into Kara’s arm, the Kryptonian woke up in alarm. “What the hell is going on? Ow, what is that?!”

“You fainted and that’s not normal so Alex is running some tests. We’re just taking a bit of blood”, Winn explained hastily before Kara could completely freak out.

Her eyes widened in bewilderment and surprise. “I fainted?!”

“I’ve got it”, Alex took out the syringe and immediately exited the room to presumably go into the lab that she and Winn shared.

“I’ll go help her”, Winn disappeared out of the room and left J’onn and Kara alone.

“Have you been having any other symptoms?”

For a minute, Kara was tempted to lie but she knew that would be completely pointless considering that they already knew something was wrong. “I felt sick last night but thought it was just stress. Then I was sick this morning before I left but I fooled myself that it was just anxiety making me throw up”.

J’onn’s eyebrows shot up incredulously.

A few minutes later, Alex came back into the room with a frown on her face and a test tube full of her blood. “There’s something wrong but I’m going to need to take a scan to be able to say for sure”.

Winn followed her in a minute after with an ultrasound machine.

“Is this necessary?” Kara sighed.

“If this is what I think it is then yes”, Alex snapped as she turned on the ultrasound and proceeded to put the probe up Kara’s private parts after shoving her skirt up and her underwear down. J’onn and Winn both turned around to give her privacy at this point. When the picture on the screen became clear, Alex’s mouth dropped open. Winn and J’onn, now looking at the screen, both squinted.

Alarm bells began to ring in Kara’s head at her sister’s shocked face. “What’s going on? Why do you look like that? Alex?”

“Wait, is that what I think it is?” Winn stared as his face drained of colour.

“That’s impossible”, J’onn frowned.

“What in Rao’s name is going on?” Kara bellowed, already sick of being the only one not to know what was wrong with her.

Alex snapped out of her shock and turned to look at her sister anxiously. “I don’t know how to tell you this Kara, especially with everything being so fresh but…you’re pregnant”.

She heard the words but they didn’t compute. “What?” she furrowed her brows, sure that she had misheard her sister.

“You’re pregnant, Kara. About seven weeks along”.

“No”, Kara laughed nervously. “I can’t be. I just can’t”.

“Well you are”, Winn rubbed his neck as he pointed at the screen. “See that jelly bean shape right there? That’s a baby, Kara. Your baby”.

“How…but…I was on birth control. Mon-El was…he didn’t…We never” she rambled, unable to process the fact that she was pregnant. She was really pregnant.

“Are you trying to say you never had sex? I know that’s a lie since I walked in on the two of you”, Alex pointed out, folding her arms. “And that birth control was never one hundred percent effective for you. You’re not a human and they’ve yet to make Kryptonian birth control”.

There was silence for a moment before Kara suddenly burst out giggling hysterically. The rest of the people in the room looked at each other concerned for her mental state. “I’m pregnant and Mon-El is floating around in space”, she cackled. “I’m going to have his baby while somewhere he’s asleep in my old pod while meteorites pass him by. This is brilliant”. She swore that she had laughed so hard she had a stitch in her side. “He doesn’t even know. He won’t ever know”.

Tears began to well up in her eyes as her laughter quickly turned to sobs. Sobs that she had not allowed to slip out since she’d seen him off in her pod. “I lost the man I love but now I’m pregnant and I’m alone”.

“You’re not alone”, Alex quickly wrapped her arms around her distraught sister, cradling her like she was her own child. “I’m here. J’onn’s here. Winn and James are here. Our mom’s here. I know Clark will come if you call him. You are not alone, alright? We’ll get you through this”.

Kara hugged her sister back as though her life depended on it.

Eventually her tears began to fade and she started to calm down. She knew now that she couldn’t keep on ignoring her heartbreak over Mon-El and that pretending that Kara Danvers was nothing had been a futile idea.

Eventually Kara left the DEO and returned to her flat to change since there were people she needed to talk and apologise to, namely James and Lena. She’d ask for her job back and take the first step into accepting that Supergirl wasn’t all that she was. Especially now that she was going to be a mother, a thought that would probably never seem not strange and foreign to her.

#Karamel #Supervalor #Kara Danvers #Mon-El #fanfic #myfanfic #my fics #Supergirl #baby fic

[queercapwriting]

Not Against an Accident

“Idk if this is just me being a low key suicidal teen but there were a lot of suicide hint kinda things like Alex being “brave” when officer white man (I don’t remember his name) pulled a gun on her and just the way she was acting when everyone was like “u almost died” and then Big Alex being like “I wasn’t too against getting in an accident then” when she made fun of Kara’s driving because like those r jokes I make All The Time so just wondering if u could write about Alex dealing with that/Kara checking on Alex about it” prompt from a brave and wonderful Anon

They’d called her brave, then.

To hear that she’d stood at gunpoint and hadn’t flinched.

Kenny was dead, and it was her fault: because if she’d been better to him, somehow, he would have been alive. She knew it.

Vicki was out of her life, and it was her fault: she didn’t know why they’d kept fighting, but it was Alex’s doing. She knew it.

Her father was dead, and it was her fault: well, maybe not the plane crashing specifically, but if she’d been better behaved, taken better care of Kara, maybe he wouldn’t have gone away on his work trip so suddenly, maybe he would have stayed. But he didn’t, and it was her fault. She knew it.

Her mother was different, and it was her fault: she was a cold-hearted person, she knew it. She wasn’t brave. Not brave enough to be kind to Kara. Not brave enough to defend Kenny at school. Not brave enough to be sympathetic, to be understanding, to not roll her eyes when Eliza talked about how Kara had lost everything and they had to be good to her, they had to take care of her. She was cold-hearted and she was cruel and she was broken, and her mother knew, Kara’s presence had revealed it, so it was her fault her mother was different. She knew it.

And Kara... Kara. The last thing she would remember of Alex would be her storming out of their room, declaring Kara unfit, declaring her unworthy, not good enough. Kara would be broken, and it would be her fault. She knew it.

So when they called her brave, for standing there in front of a loaded gun, in front of a man who’d murdered her friend -- so she knew he would pull the trigger, that his treats weren’t empty -- she knew what they didn’t.

She knew they were wrong.

She wasn’t brave.

She was just... tired.

She just wanted to rest.

She just wanted it to end.

Just like she knows, now, that she isn’t brave.

She isn’t being stoic, or calm, or stony in the face of heartbreak.

She’s just... tired.

She just wants to rest.

She just wants it to end.

Because she was supposed to be building a lifetime of firsts with Maggie.

Instead, she was building a new series of firsts with herself.

First time sleeping without her in their bed, not because one of them was on shift, but because... because.

First time trying to eat without her.

First time looking down at her left hand and wanting to burn everything to the ground because it was missing a ring, it was missing a promise, it was missing a full, happy life of firsts.

So when she sees the possum darting out onto the road before Kara does, she doesn’t react.

She doesn’t try to backseat drive.

Because she knows Kara will swerve. Hard.

Too hard.

And maybe, just maybe, if she’s lucky, hard enough.

Kara will be fine. The whole invincibility thing. And M’gann will be able to send J’onn another ship.

It’ll probably be salvageable, anyway. If it can survive the vacuum of space, it can certainly survive a possum-induced car crash, right?

But the car doesn’t crash.

She sighs.

Kara raises her eyebrows over her sunglasses at the lack of reprimand, at the utter lack of response from her sister.

She says nothing.

She says nothing, that is, until Alex makes that passing comment that really isn’t so passing. The one about not being too against getting into an accident.

But now Alex is driving, and that’s good. Now, it seems, she cares.

So Kara cranks up J’onn’s utterly shocking playlist, and they sing -- badly -- and they giggle -- hysterically -- until they can barely breathe, until they pull over, still laughing, to a rest stop to snack on sandwiches and Eliza’s chocolate pecan pie.

“Alex,” Kara asks with a mouthful of pie, having left all the sandwiches to her sister and gone right for the real prize. “What did you mean, back home? About an accident, and not... not being against one?”

Alex takes an overly large bite of her sandwich, then, and Kara recognizes the tactic as the one that buys her a few precious seconds to think, to calculate.

She takes an enormous gulp and squints before she speaks, carefully. “Doesn’t matter about accidents now, I’m driving, not you,” she tries to turn it into a joke, but Kara won’t have it.

“Alex -- “

“You remember when we were kids?” Alex starts suddenly, and Kara quiets and listens. Just listens, and loves, and arranges her face into one of empathy but not sympathy, caring but not panic, because that’s what Alex needs. “After we though Dad died, and then Kenny, and I didn’t... I didn’t see the point, you know? And sometimes, now, I don’t... after Maggie... it’s not... it’s not something I’d do anything about, you know, I don’t think. It’s just... a thought, sometimes. Almost... almost, maybe, a wish. That I didn’t have to do it anymore, feel anymore. Be responsible anymore. So sometimes it... sometimes it’s like a wish. Like... like if there was a passive way to be here one moment and gone the next, simple, I could just...” 

She screws up her eyes and she shakes her head and Kara scoots closer to her. Alex leans into her offer of an embrace.

“But then I’d be leaving you. And then I’d be... I’ve gotten through it, you know? Every time. Every single one of them. Every terrible thought, every... every moment of giving up. So if I surrender to it, I just... I just know I can get through it, you know? Because I have before. Obviously I have, I’m here, so... I’m sorry, I’m not making any sense.”

Kara shakes her head and brushes stray strands of hair from Alex’s forehead. “You’re making perfect sense, actually. Is there... is there anything that I can do? In those moments? Anything you want, or need?”

“I don’t need a fuss. I don’t want pity and I don’t want... I just want... I just want you. To be there. To not force me to talk about it if I don’t... just... just be there. And for Rao’s sake, learn how to drive.”

Kara snorts, and Alex’s own dry laughter follows. “I’m sorry,” she says again, and Kara shakes her head again.

“You have nothing to apologize for, Alex. Nothing, okay? I’m here. Always. No matter what, alright? And I’m... I’m proud of you. For telling me, and for... for getting through. All those times you’ve gotten through.”

Alex’s eyes are shining with tears when she raises her head to meet her sister’s gaze. 

“Yeah?” she asks, her voice broken but her heart somewhat hopeful.

“Always, Alex. I promise.”

#tw: suicide reference #tw: gun reference #supergirl 3x06 #supergirl fix it #sanvers minific

[vevehoshizora]

BEAUTIFUL GIRL - Part 3 - (supergirl) kara danvers x fem!reader

A Supergirl Soulmate AU in which soul-marks are situated on the wrist and are the nickname of your soulmate. They appear at some point of a person's life. Kara and you finally are together, but there is now some trouble in paradise. Your dates always seemed to be interrupted by some emergencies on Kara's side. Will Kara finally reveal her real identity? |[ 1,547 words ]|

Part 1 | 2 | 3

WARNINGS: female x female

Y/N = your name

y/h/c = your hair color

y/e/c = your eye color

So... the final part is kinda messy. :P Whoops. And I'm so sorry I took be soooo long, but it's finally here!

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 "Hi, it's Kara! Sorry, I couldn't answer. I'll call you back as soon as I can."

 The metallic-like voice of Kara – transformed by the speaker of the phone – delivered the short message as Y/N audibly sighed, putting her phone down on the table. The girl gazed around the restaurant, still hoping to catch the familiar blonde hair of her girlfriend.

 "I'm sorry, Mademoiselle. Would you like to order now?" the serveur said as he approached Y/N's table for the umpteenth time. The girl looked at the boy and remarked the subtle look of pity he was sending her way.

 The y/h/c-headed ignored it, simply sighing before answering: "Could I wait a little again?"

 The boy anxiously looked at the clock. "B-But, it's nearly closing time, Mademoiselle," he stuttered and, as Y/N look around the restaurant, she realized that nearly everyone else was gone with a few finishing their desert.

 "Then, I'll take a strawberry shortcake," Y/N responded. The boy solemnly nodded before leaving to go fetch the order.

 Y/N gazed at the clock, then at her phone and deeply sighed.

 Guess I'll stick to ice cream tonight... again, the girl thought.

 "Rao! That sure was an eventful day! Four aliens in total!" Kara exclaimed as she sat down on the sun bed. Alex turned toward her: "Yeah. Luckily, you weren't injured in the fights."

 "By the way, you're phone was going crazy for most of the evening. You have one missed call from Cat Grant, another from Clark, and a bunch of them from Y/N," Alex called out as she threw Kara's phone at the blonde. Said girl nimbly caught it as her eyes widened at her sister's last sentence.

 "Y/N!!!" Alex nearly jumped in fright at the loudness of her sister's scream. She then raised an eyebrow as she heard something that suspiciously sounded like a swear in Kryptonian. "Oh Rao, Alex! What hour is it!?" Kara exclaimed with anxiety.

 "Kara, you have your phone in your hand. But to answer your question, it's ten pm," Alex replied.

 "Gods, oh gods. I'm so stupid!" Kara panicked as her sister watched her paced around the room. "Kara! Stop pacing and tell me what's going on!" Alex ordered and her sister stopped.

 "I-I had a date with Y/N today," Kara silently admitted as she held her head down in shame. "Had a date today?" Alex slowly repeated, her mind processing the events of the day, "But you were here or chasing some alien all day long."

 "Exactly... I-I forgot, Alex," Kara said as she gaze up to meet her sister's eyes. Said eyes widened in shock: "Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?" Alex questioned.

 "Yes!" Kara shamefully exclaimed, "It's not the first time I had to cancel, but now, I didn't even warn her that I wasn't coming. Oh gods, I can't even begin to imagine what she must be thinking. She must hate me."

 There was a silence before Alex spoke up: "Kara... I won't lie and say that everything is fine because it's not. Y/N must be worried sick and angered. But, she loves you. You're her soulmate and you two belong together. I know she will forgive you, but, for now, you need to make it to her. Not only for today but for all the other times you had to cancel as well."

 "H-How?" the Kryptonian anxiously stuttered. "Take some time off," Alex proposed, "Of Supergirl, I mean. Let us handle everything for a week and spend some time with Y/N. You have to show her that you love her and that you want this relationship to work."

 Kara slowly nodded as she tried to think about what she could do to make it up to you. She smiled at her sister. "You're the best, Alex. Thank you," she said as she engulfed the brunette in a tight but not hurtful hug before she left.

 Kara took her keys out and entered her apartment. Well, it was Y/N's apartment as well now. Both girls had decided, not long after they started dating, to move in together.

 Before the girls got together, Y/N was already spending most of her time at the apartment with the Kryptonian, so it came to no surprise to anyone that Y/N did move in not long after their relationship began.

 As Kara entered, she immediately remarked her girlfriend's sleeping form on the couch. A movie was playing on the television; The Space Between Us, Kara realized. Kind of hilarious if you thought about it, considering the fact that the main character could be considered an alien that came down on Earth and fell in love with an human girl.

 Kara's gaze softened as she kneeled beside the couch where Y/N had fallen asleep. Her hand reached the girl's face as she brushed some loose strands of hair away. "I'm so sorry..." the girl murmured in a silent breath. She then laid a kiss on the y/h/c-haired girl's forehead. 

 She carefully lifted up Y/N as she brought her to their shared bedroom. Kara gently laid her girlfriend back down under the warm blankets of the bed before she left to prepare herself for sleep.

 As the blonde climbed in the bed, she cuddled up to Y/N's body, praying to Rao for her girlfriend to forgive her before she fell into Morpheus' comforting arms.

 Y/N's eyes slowly blinked as the girl woke up. The sun, which was lightly peeking through the curtains of the room, had been the cause of the girl's awakening.  As she glanced around the room, she realized that this wasn't where she had initially fallen asleep. The y/e/c-eyed girl's expression saddened at the thought of Kara, who had probably been the one to move her to their bedroom, as she remembered the events of last night.

 During that evening, she had patiently waited for Kara to come back from wherever she was, but sleep at won the fight and Y/N had fallen asleep before the other girl's arrival.

 Y/N's thinking was interrupted as she heard soft footsteps approaching the bedroom. She considered faking sleep, but ultimately decided against it. Kara's head peaked into the room and she entered when she remarked that her girlfriend was awake. "Hey," the girl quietly said.

 Y/N acknowledged her greeting with a nod and a small smile as she avoided the blonde gaze. Kara sighed and settled down beside the y/h/c-haired. She took Y/N's hand in hers and soothingly massaged it. "I'm sorry... I was so absorbed in my work and, when I realized what hour it was, it was already too late. It doesn't excuse what I did last night and I'm terribly sorry for what happened," Kara explained.

 Y/N turned to look at her, their eyes meeting and Y/N saw the guilt in those beautiful blue orbs. "It's okay, Kar..." the girl smiled at her girlfriend. Said blonde surprisingly frowned. "No, it's not," Kara affirmed as she looked down.

 "All I've been doing lately is cancelling our dates. You're so important to me and I don't want to lose you because of this," Kara said as she looked back up into Y/N's eyes. The y/h/c-haired could see tears forming in the corners of her girlfriend's eyes.

 "You won't lose me," Y/N reassured as she engulfed Kara into a hug. "And you have reasons for cancelling, I understand that. After all, you're busy saving the world. That's awesome!" the girl continued as she felt the blonde froze in her embrace.

 "What do you mean?" Kara asked in a 'I'm trying to hide how panicked I am' voice. Y/N laughed at the girl's expression. "Kara! Did you really think I wouldn't catch on? I'm not dumb. I know you and I would recognize you anywhere," the y/h/c-haired explained as she took Kara's glasses off.

 The blonde shyly brushed back a loose lock of hair behind her ear. "I guess it do was stupid to think you wouldn't realize..." Kara blushed before she turned serious: "But, you're okay with the fact that I'm an alien?"

 "Yes, Kara. I love you for you. Though, I am really curious to know your real story," Y/N smiled as she kissed the blonde's cheek. Kara's expression lit up as she excitedly leaded you out of bed and into the living room.

 "I was worried about how you would react... I guess it went much better than I would have thought," Kara explained as she sat down on the couch, rapidly followed by you. "I have the week off of Supergirl and I want to spend it with you. Make it up to you," the girl continued.

 "Alright, what do we start with?" Y/N asked with a smile. Kara's eyes lit up: "I thought that maybe we could make a picnic and then, afterward, some star-gazing. Since I'm Supergirl, I can take you flying and, honestly, the sky is just so pretty. I also thought that we could go to the zoo! And, I was thinking about going to that new Chinese restaurant that opened not long ago."

 Y/N listened as Kara rambled on about various activities they could do and she lovingly smiled towards the girl.

 Gosh, I love her, Y/N thought before Kara leaded her to the kitchen for breakfast.

#supergirl #kara danvers #kara zor-el #alex danvers #supergirl imagine #supergirl imagines #supergirl x reader #kara danvers imagine #kara danvers imagines #kara danvers x reader #dc #dc comics #dc imagine #dc imagines #dc x reader #kara zor-el imagine #kara zor-el imagines #kara zor-el x reader #alex danvers imagine #alex danvers imagines #y/n #reader #y/n imagine #y/n imagines #reader imagine #reader imagines #imagine #imagines #reader insert #x reader

[jiemba]

Danvers Sisters Week Day 2 “I Got You”

I didn’t have time to write something for Danvers Sisters Week so I’ve reworked an Alex backstory I did a while back (original here). I’ve always been really interested in how Alex saw Kara as yet another burden when she was young, hence this angsty mess. Contains discussion of grief, self-harm and suicidal ideation. Thanks to @queercapwriting for organising the week, apologies for the lateness.

In the corner of her kitchen, reading her science textbook while cooking a dinner that Eliza will never thank her for, she can almost forget about it all. She can almost forget how she has to help Kara with her homework, before sorting through bills and folding the laundry, and then maybe, maybe, finally finishing her debating notes before she falls asleep at her desk. She can almost forget that the memories of him are waiting for her, in every corner of the house, the size of corpses. But even reading about black holes, about the lives and deaths of stars, feels too close. Close like when she’s half asleep in the morning, and she can almost hear the hallway floor creak under his feet, smell his coffee in the kitchen as he reads the paper. Each time she wakes, the grief comes to her brass-knuckled, and the silence that rips through the house is as real and raw as a howl.

Still stirring, she turns instead to her debating notes. The topic: ‘The benefits of animal testing outweigh any ethical dilemmas which may arise from such a practise’. Tastes the words in the back of her throat. Fights the urge to dig her pencil into her forearm, as far as she can bear it to go. Daniel thought she’d be more excited. It’s a science topic. But all she can think of is how she had to dissect a frog last semester in bio, how the whole class had witnessed the sickened sob that clawed its way out of her throat when she sliced open its stomach with shaking hands. How Vicki had held her hair back for ten whole minutes while she threw up at the thought of her father’s body coming apart just as easily - the body he didn’t even have the fucking decency to leave for her. The thought of pieces of him hundreds of metres apart, peppered across some unknown ocean. Kneecaps lost among coral. Chunks of scalp. Teeth. How she couldn’t surf for weeks after, because it had felt like swimming in blood, and every brush of seaweed was someone’s hand, someone’s hair. Because she’d see the foam of waves coming up at her in a violent white rush and think, bodies. “Alex, are you OK?” She nods again, too quickly, not bothering to look behind her to where Kara is sitting at the kitchen table, brow furrowed behind her glasses. “Fine.”

“But your heart...”

“I said I’m fine.”

Her back pocket vibrates. It’s Daniel.

I know things are really overwhelming today. Just want you to know I’m thinking of you. You can talk to me whenever you need, beautiful. D.

With shaking hands she tucks her phone away, remembering how kissing him in the library at lunch earlier had felt like missing the last step of the stairs. Maybe that’s what it feels like to like someone.

It’s distracting, she thinks, if she can call it anything.

She kisses him because she has to. Because she needs to be perfect, because she needs to be normal, because Vicki will smile when she tells her about it later.

Because he’s the only thing of hers that Kara hasn’t touched.

Because her dad had liked him.

She remembers how he’d helped Daniel with his tie before debating finals last year - how grown up the boy had looked in a suit, an arm around her shoulder as they posed with their trophy. She can’t look at that trophy anymore - the one Eliza’s expecting her to win again. Can’t look at that picture anymore, knowing who’d taken it.

She was a different girl in that picture.

Her dad had teased her all the way home when he saw Alex’s face redden at the suggestion of a crush, only spurred on by Eliza telling him to leave the poor girl alone, she should be focusing on school. Sometimes, when she kisses Daniel, she can almost hear her Dad laugh in the kind of way that fills a car, that lights a highway.

She almost wants to tell him that his tenderness is wasted on her. But he’s good, and he’s kind, and he was there for her when her dad died, and she owes him this. I’m lucky, she tells herself, forcing her hand back into her pocket to type a reply, forcing her mind blank. I’m lucky, I’m lucky, I’m lucky. But the shake in her skin doesn’t leave her, and with her phone in her hand, there’s only one person she wants to call. Ignoring Kara, she turns off the stove and pushes herself to the bathroom. The whole way, grief stalks her like a shadow, familiar as a sister, as she frantically dials the number she’s been paying the bills for since it happened, just to keep it open. Hello, you’ve reached Jeremiah Danvers. Please leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. There’s so much she wants to say. I miss you. I love you. I need you here. Fuck you. I’m doing everything you wanted. Come back. Please. Please. But the only air in her lungs comes out in a wet choke as she dials again, again, scratching her fingernails hard into her ribs. I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.

“I don’t get this,” Kara mutters when she returns, knowing too well not to ask Alex if she’s OK twice. Alex sighs, not stopping her walk to the counter to chop mushrooms. “Which part?” “All of it. Math was different on my planet.” No one cares about your fucking planet, Kara, she wants to say. It’s gone, it’s gone, it’s gone. “You could be as good at it as you are at English, you’re just not trying hard enough,” Alex snaps in exasperation, almost slicing her finger. “You can’t ask me everything. Just figure it out on your own for once.”

The young girl nods quietly, and Alex feels herself soften involuntarily at the sight of her at her kitchen table, downcast, hair falling around her glasses. Hears her mother’s voice in her head - what are you, Alex, if you can’t look after her? She sighs, “Let me see, OK?“ Kara doesn’t look up, twisting her book around to face Alex before sitting on her hands. “You’re oversimplifying,” Alex says. “You can’t add those two x’s together - they have different powers.” “Sorry,” Kara mutters. “I forgot.“ “It’s OK. Just try again,” Alex replies, rolling a button mushroom across the table to cheer her up. Kara scoops it up and nibbles immediately. “I’m sorry I snapped at you, I just -” “I know. Can’t I help with dinner?” Alex has to fight her flinch, remembering the times Kara got too excited while cooking - ripped the door off the fridge, sliced through a chopping board and into the counter. Always Alex’s fault. “No. Just focus on school.“ “But Alex,” she says gently, “You have to focus on everything.” Alex fights the urge to grind her teeth, going back to slicing, her fingers tight around the knife she doesn’t trust herself alone with. “That’s the way it is.” They eat dinner in the nearest thing to silence. Kara tries to tell her how she’s going to interview the new exchange student for the school paper, what fascinating earthly custom she learned about in class, and did you know that lots of earth cultures have sun gods just like Rao? Alex hears none of it - only the scratch of her fork against the plate, pushing around the food she can’t taste, can’t bring herself to swallow, when there’s an empty chair across from her. She forces herself up before she kicks the thing across the room. Dumps her food back in the fridge, storms outside, and Kara knows better than to say anything in the wake of her tornado.

It doesn’t matter that it’s November, or that it’s too dark to surf. She runs hard into the frozen spit of the Pacific, barely stripping before treading into the water, letting the cold close around her ribs like a bear trap.

It’s the closest she can get to him now.

But the memory that comes to her isn’t the one she expects. She thinks of how she was out here just yesterday on her board, carving suicide notes along the arm of every wave, long and hard and unforgiving, before Vicki had found her.

She remembers Vicki swimming to her, pressing the water out of her dulled red hair, scanning the horizon as the dusk burned down to night. How her bikini strap had been cutting too hard into her right shoulder, the skin pink. How following her home had felt like holding onto a fistful of sand, the girl’s fingerprints around her wrist all teardrops and hurricanes, and her chest had gone tight, but she hadn’t known why.

The truth is, being with Daniel feels like tracking through a place she’s never been. But Vicki, somehow, feels like stumbling through the house she grew up in in the middle of the night, finding it unrecognisable in the dark. Alex is glad. Alex doesn’t want to see. Because the only person she can imagine spending so much time with is her. She knows everything about her. She knows that she’s too honest to sneak into a second movie without buying a ticket. She knows, when she watches her sleep on Saturday mornings at her house, the exact depth her mattress sinks to under her weight, the exact slant of light that will make her turn to her. The exact pattern freckles on her right shoulder, all clustered in even numbers.

Trying to escape the thought, she floats on her back, eyes to the stars that barely feel like hers anymore with an alien in the house, letting the ocean rock her in the palm of its hand. It feels so gentle, she thinks, for such a monstrous thing.

She wonders if he saw it coming. If he was scared. The thought makes her curl and sink a little, face crumpling. Of course he was scared. Of course he knew. Of course he prayed. Everyone becomes a believer in the breath before their throat is cut. She can’t pretend that she was with him when he needed her. She can’t pretend she’d held his hand But maybe, maybe, she can be with him now. She casts her eyes across the water to the riptide. Maybe it would be easy. Maybe it wouldn’t even hurt that much - certainly not more than this. And maybe, dying alone out here is a worthy punishment for letting him die alone up there. Nobody would miss her - only the perfect grades and gleaming trophies and cooked dinners. At the bottom of the ocean there’d be no school, no debate team, no surf competitions. No mother to disappoint. No sister to fail. No boys looking at her longer and longer. No Vicki, her smile drawing her in like the tug of an approaching wave. No house that was too quiet, too fucking quiet, without her father in it. No. At the bottom of the ocean, there’d be nothing. Nothing at all. A plane passes overhead. She shoves herself beneath the surface. Lets the dark mass of the water close over her head. And finally, when she’s deep enough in the blackness, lets herself cry and wail and scream, wishing the ocean would just take her, drag her by its teeth, drag her down, down, down, to be with what was left of her father.

If Kara hears her, she leaves her be.

In the shower, Alex turns up the water so hot it steams the mirrors. She doesn’t want to see her wasting body, the sinking gaps between her ribs like sandbanks. She forces herself under the spray, the water hot enough to raise welts, for a count of ten, twenty, thirty, until a silent cry catches in her throat. But it’s OK, it’s OK, she won’t leave marks like this, she’ll still look perfect, perfect, perfect. There’s a pounding on the door. “Alex.” “Just a second,” she chokes out. Stay under. Stay under. Her knees buckle. “I know something’s wrong, Alex. I can hear your heart.” Alex scoffs. Of course she fucking can. She can never get a moment to herself in this house. “Alex, open up. Please.” She turns off the water and braces herself against the sink, tears drying on her cheeks. Her chest is heaving, and her hands shake, but somehow she puts her clothes back on, covers herself, makes herself look “fine”. She opens the door. “What?”

“You’ve been crying,” Kara notices. “Like you care,” Alex snaps, pushing past her. “There. Shower’s yours.”

“Where did you go? I was scared.”

“Just training.”

“For the lifeguard test?”

Alex narrows her eyes. “You can’t tell Eliza.”

“She’ll come around, Alex. She’d be proud of you,” she says, causing Alex to let out a mirthless hint of a chuckle. 

Because last summer, when Micah Lush fainted during a surf comp on a 100 degree day, Alex had been the first to abandon her wave to paddle to him, heaving his body back onto his board until the lifeguards arrived.

She remembers seeing Kara standing on the shore, watching, feet rooted to the ground. 

Eliza had faked her tenderness, her Oh sweetheart, I’m so glad you’re alright as she pulled her from Micah’s family to take her home. But Alex saw through it all, saw the slap coming as soon as Kara was sent upstairs, expected the what the hell were you thinking, Alexandra, doing something so irresponsible, how can I trust you to take care of Kara when you’re so careless, so selfish, so untrustworthy, your father would be so disappointed in you, you stupid, stupid girl, trying to be brave... She hadn’t known how to tell Eliza that she knew she wasn’t brave. She just didn’t care if she died. Of course, Kara had heard it all, and Alex had spent half an hour convincing the crying girl that she was fine, that Eliza was just grieving, that violence could be momentarily painless when there was no warning.

Now, she can only glare at her sister. “If you think she’d be proud,” she almost snarls, voice low. “Then you haven’t been paying attention.”

Sighing as Alex walks past her, Kara tries to follow her down the hallway. “Do you want to look at the stars tonight on the roof? We used to do that all the time, remember?” “Another lifetime.”

“We can do it to remember him, Alex. I miss him too.”

That makes her turn on her heels, with almost enough rage in her to push the girl against the wall, and scream “How, Kara? You didn’t even know him.“ “Alex -” “He wasn’t your dad. He was mine. He didn’t love you. He just felt sorry for you.“ “I’m just trying to -” “No, fuck you, Kara. After Dad died, all Eliza kept telling me was how she needed me to take more responsibility around the house, how much more she was going to rely on me to look after you. ‘Don’t cry too loud in the house, you’ll scare Kara. Concepts of death might be different on Krypton, you’ll need to explain things to Kara. Poor thing’s already lost her planet, you need to be there for Kara.’ My fucking dad died and somehow it was still all about fucking Kara. Is there any part of my life you haven’t touched?“ “Alex, wait,” Kara cries, reaching out to her. She jerks away. “Or what? You’re gonna break my arm again?“ “That was an accident, I’m better now. Please, Alex -” “No, just stop. Stop talking to me like you’re my sister. Stop talking to me at all. Just leave me alone.” With that, she shoves the whimpering girl away from her, and Kara accepts the violence willingly. She bounds through the house in a blind rage, a white heat, and before she knows it she’s on the floor of a closet she’s almost torn apart, howling into her father’s favourite sweater. It doesn’t smell like him anymore, but she inhales with shuddering lungs anyway, holds it so tight the fibres scratch beneath her fingernails, and she wails, and she begs, and she screams how much she hates him, and for the first time since he died, she doesn’t bother trying to stay quiet. It’s a long while before her caterwauls become whimpers, her tears and snot and spit sticking to her face, to his clothes. Only when she’s able to breathe again, when she’s lying on her back in a pile of his clothes, staring at the roof, does Kara come in, quietly padding across the room to sit on the floor. Alex rolls away from her, clutches one of his shirts to her chest. “Fuck off, Kara.” She hears the girl sigh. “I know he wasn’t my father, Alex. But I did love him. And I know you don’t want to talk to me right now, but I did lose my dad too.“ A choked sob resonates in the room. Alex buries her face in the shirt, rocking herself and shaking her head hard, and Kara has to close her eyes, dizzied by the sound of her sister’s blood rushing to a drumless beat. Eventually, Alex calms, stroking golden ratio swirls on the cuffs of one of his jackets. “Kara,” she croaks, swallowing hard. “On Krypton, do you believe in ghosts?“ “No,” Kara murmurs. “But we believe we join our ancestors, when it’s time. At funerals we get released back into the sky, so we can be with the stars. He’s not alone, Alex.” She chokes a little, hiccups on her tears. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel him everywhere. It’s like I’m going crazy.” “You’re not, Alex. You’re just grieving.” Wiping her face with her sleeve, she whimpers, “Does it get easier?” Kara softens, edges a little closer to lay a hand on her sister’s shoulder. Amazingly, Alex lets her. “It still hurts. But one day, you’ll think of something funny he did, and you’ll laugh.” Alex has to scoff at that. She can’t imagine laughing ever again. Her chest goes tight, and she wants to burn the world down, wants to trade places with him. Anything but this. “I want him back,” she sobs, and Kara smooths her hand down her arm, careful not to hurt her. “I know, Alex. I’m so sorry. I got you. Always.” After Alex’s heart slows, the flow of her blood smoothing out, Kara takes her hand and pulls her up, helping her hang Jeremiah’s clothes before taking her to the roof.

The sky is especially clear tonight, but every star pales in comparison to her desire to be with him. A blanket around their shoulders, the two sisters watch the stars glow, Kara pointing out their favourites, telling her all the Kryptonian legends of how they got their names. Laughing about how Jeremiah always thought constellations made no sense, how he’d draw weird faces for them between the dots.  And for a moment, Alex can almost forget about it all. She can almost forget that she needs to wash her father’s stained clothes before Eliza gets home, that she still hasn’t touched those bills, that she said the most horrible things to Kara, that her father probably felt everything, everything, everything when he died. For a moment, she lets her sister hold her, sighing into her arms, imagining that he’s just downstairs making them hot chocolate.

“Alex, look.”

When she wipes her eyes and looks up, the sky’s alight with shooting stars, and she gasps along with her sister. “A meteor shower.”

“His favourite,” Kara murmurs, pulling her impossibly closer. “He must have asked them to come out for you.”

And for the first time in months, Alex laughs through her tears, eyes sparkling with reflected light. Because the notion is ridiculous. Impossible. So impossible.

And yet it’s the exact sort of thing that he would do.

#DanversSistersWeek #day2 #alex danvers #kara danvers #oops its now #day6