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txemrn · 3 years

Note

For the simping softness prompt...

Sam & Brynn - " hey, everything's gonna be fine. stay where you are, i'm on my way. "

Hey, Nestle! Thank you so much for the request! I hope you enjoy this, and I hope you enjoy a fluffier Sam Dalton (for a change)! 🥰❤

***

Unveiled

Book: TNA

Warning: language; fluffy

A/N: Huge thank you to sweet @kat-tia801 for pre-reading this and helping me in my headspace with that darn moodboard! 🤣

***

Sipping hypnotically on her early morning espresso, a well-dressed Brynn stoically sits at the marble breakfast bar. Her normally careless, wavy almond tresses are neatly styled and pinned into a low, tasteful bun, exposing the pure white brilliance of her vintage Tiffany pearl earrings, courtesy of her future in-laws for accepting their son’s proposal to join the family. Her make-up is fixed modestly, her lips adorning her perfect shade of mauve, complimenting the ripples of blue and gray in her sparkling eyes. Her pressed midi eyelet dress is designed for women of status, easily paired with her nude, red-bottom heels.

And Brynn has never felt more uncomfortable.

Even though Sam asked for Brynn’s hand in marriage shortly after the new year, the couple agreed to announce their engagement intimately last month to their families. They knew the news would not come as a huge shock, but Sam had cautioned his young fiancée that wedding and party planning is a long-standing tradition amongst the Dalton family women, and it would begin the moment they knew a date had been set. Though she heard his warning, Brynn was not prepared for the onslaught of opinions, decisions being made without her approval, and more importantly, the disregard to her budget.

“Babe, we just spent $12,000. On a fucking cake--” nervously cried Brynn on Monday evening. Sam took the early morning off for wedding cake tasting, but left his bride-to-be with Vivian, his mother, and two of his cousins, Brigitte and Katarina, to talk design as he returned to the office

“Sweetie,” Sam kissed her gingerly, “don’t worry about the price.” He lovingly pressed his lips again to her mouth, this time embracing her comfortingly. “I got it--” Brynn forced a smile, nodding her head dutifully, but the price tag burdened her.

This is not me.

Today, Sam’s cousin Daphne, an apprentice for the designers at Alexander McQueen, has scheduled a fitting with a private collection from a recent trunk show of wedding dresses. Brynn already has her heart set on a dress she saw with Jenny and her mom back in Philly, but as to not rock the boat, Brynn agreed to look at dresses with the Daltons this morning.

A smooth, deep voice startles her from her thoughts as Sam wraps his arms around Brynn’s waist. “I almost didn’t recognize you.”

That makes two of us.

Brynn bats her eyelashes. “Do I look like a Dalton?”

“Even better,” he peppers her neck with kisses, “you look similar to the gorgeous woman that agreed to marry me.” A natural smile takes over Brynn as she spins around in her stool to face Sam. She delicately slides her hands around his neck, pulling him into a more intentional, hungrier kiss. Sam pulls away first, tracing the back of his fingers across her soft cheeks. “Ready for another day with the fam?”

“Ready or not,” Brynn sardonically chuckles.

Sam kisses the tip of her nose. “Now, aren’t you missing something?” Brynn furrows her eyebrows, giving Sam a curious look until he pulls his other hand into view. On his pinky finger resting on his first knuckle is the 2.4 carat Graff emerald-cut engagement ring he had given her. “Do I need to superglue this on or what?”

Brynn nervously giggles. “I’m sorry, babe, I just--”she titters, “--you know, I’m just not used to this--”

And the five-digit price tag…

Sam raises an eyebrow, offering his hand with his palm facing up. Brynn’s eyes meet his dreamy, chocolate gaze as her hand easily melts into his. With his eyes not leaving her stormy blues, he glides the diamond on her finger. The perfect fit. He kisses her knuckles before kissing her lips again.

“You better get going, babe.” Resting his hands on Brynn’s hips, Sam helps her off the high-top chair. “Hey,” he leans over, suckling briefly on the crook of her neck and shoulder before brushing his lips against the shell of her ear. “This is all about us. Just you and me.” He offers a crooked smile, squeezing tightly to her hand. “Remember to have fun.”

Brynn nods, her anxiety beginning to melt away.

That’s right. You and me.

“I love you, baby.”

“I love you, too, beautiful.”

***

Flipping through notecards for his marketing presentation for the Cromwell account, Sam shakes his watch down his arm. 9:52 AM. He smirks, knowing that Brynn, his mom, and cousins are well into their wedding dress appointment. He hasn’t heard from his fiancée since this morning, so he remains encouraged that no news is good news.

Sam hurries into the glass-enclosed boardroom, casually nodding to several familiar faces as he unbuttons his sport coat. As his meeting comes to order, his phone begins to ring in his pocket. He chuckles in embarrassment as everyone begins to whisper with the interruption. “My apologies, folks,” he charms with a smile. Looking at his phone, Brynn’s picture pops up, but he sends the call to voicemail. As he begins to send her a text message, she calls back immediately. He silences the chiming of his phone, staring at Brynn’s ID photo. “Uh--” his voice carries over the room as he decides whether or not to take the call.

Brynn has never been one to interrupt Sam at work. If she wants to be cute, she usually sends a message in his lunch or she emails him, ensuring not to interrupt his busy schedule. The fact that she was calling, even after her call being rejected concerns Sam. “Excuse me. I need to take this,” he informs his audience, “please go ahead and help yourself to some coffee.”

Sam exits to the hallway, answering the phone. “Hey, babe--”

“Hey.” Brynn’s voice is soft like a gentle breeze, settling into a stale silence.

“Brynn?” Sam’s voice has a hint of concern as he crosses an arm over his chest to cradle his elbow. “Are you okay, baby?”

“Yeah, I'm fine, I just--” her voice begins to crack, audibly swallowing sobs.

“Brynn baby,” Sam furrows his eyebrows, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine. I just really--” she sighs heavily, “just needed to hear your voice. I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to bother you--”

“You know full well that you are never a bother,” Sam hushes into a commanding whisper. “Is my mom being nice?”

“Oh God, yes. Everyone is lovely. It’s just--” Brynn stumbles into her own tears, crying over the phone as Sam patiently listens.

“It’s just what, baby--?”

“I can’t do this,” she abruptly answers. “I can’t keep pretending I’m something I’m not--”

“What do you mean--?”

“I have only tried on two dresses--couture dresses--Sam, that start at fifteen grand--” Sam purses his lips together, pinching the area between his eyes, listening to Brynn start to panic. “--and now I’m standing in a Sarah Burton gown rejected by Kate Middleton. Kate Middleton, Sam! And-and-and I’m wearing a diamond that costs more than my first car, and Sam, I just--I just--”

“Whoa, whoa, listen to me, baby,” Sam reassures her lovingly, “slow down. Breathe--just breathe. If you don’t want this, just say the word--”

“But your family--” Brynn tries to stifle her sobs, “God, I just--Sam, I can’t do this. I want you, and-and I love you. So fucking much,” she shakily exhales, “but this life? Are you sure? I mean--look at me--”

Sam lets out an exasperated exhale as Brynn continues to cry. He looks back into the glass conference room, seeing his presentation on the screen. He looks at his watch again before turning his attention back to the attendees to his meeting, already rolling their eyes in boredom.

Suddenly, a smile grows across his face. “Brynn baby?”

“Yeah,” she sniffles, “I’m here.’

“Where are you right now?”

“I’m hiding in the dressing room. I told the attendant I needed a minute.”

“Hey, everything’s gonna be fine. Stay where you are. I’m on my way--”

“But, Sam--”

“No ‘buts’, my beautiful bride,” he smiles cheekily, “I’ll be right there.”

***

Forty minutes later, Brynn changes back into her white, summery dress, slowly donning her heels. As she touches up her make-up for lunch with her future mother-in-law, she suddenly hears a man’s voice interrupt the hushed whispers of the Dalton women. Brynn carefully peaks out the lavish chenille curtain.

Sam.

Brynn quickly pulls open the changing room, a radiant smile illuminating her face. Sam jogs to her side, receiving her in his arms with a searing kiss. “I can’t believe you’re here--” Sam silences her, pressing his lips harder into hers, causing them both to giggle into breathless moans. Brynn opens her eyes and notices Sam has a garment bag in his hands. “What’s that?”

“Change into this.”

Brynn raises an eyebrow. “What? Why--?”

“It’s not new,” Sam informs, “but God,” he sighs, allowing a mischievous grin grow across his face. “--you look amazing in it.” Sam’s eyes lock onto Brynn’s, time and place fading around them. Brynn’s cheeks begin to flush, feeling the desire in his gaze. Sam cups Brynn’s cheek, licking his lip. “Go on,” he whispers, directing her to the dressing room and lightly spanking her on her ass, “we’ve got places to be.”

Brynn suspiciously steps backwards into the changing room, dragging her teeth across her bottom lip. She hangs up the garment bag, unzipping it hastily. Allowing the fabric to slink through her fingers, Brynn’s breath hitches, tears collecting in her eyes. Inside the protector is a short, solid black, one-shoulder dress, the same dress she wore on their official first date, the same dress she wore the night he proposed to her.

She pulls the curtain back open, causing Sam to whistle with his teeth, a golden gleam in his eyes. Giving his mother a kiss on the cheek, he steals Brynn from his family, escorting her to the car. Giving a nod to Carter, the car starts moving.

Brynn relaxes into Sam’s comforting arms. He begins to nuzzle his supple lips into her ear and neck. “Thank you, baby,” she moans. “I’m sorry for interrupting your meeting--”

“I’m not--” he growls as his lips descend to her exposed shoulder, nibbling on it.

“Sam--” Brynn gasps, leaning into the passionate smolder of his pout.

Suddenly, the car stops. Sam looks up at Brynn, offering his hand for hers. “Are you ready?”

Brynn giggles, scrunching up her nose. “I don’t even know where we are.”

Sam helps her out of the car. As she steps away from the car door to adjust her dress, she notices the grand cement gray building in front of her, adorned with large ornate columns and intricately chiseled statues. Stairs that lead to the front doors are busy with people coming and going.

Brynn furrows her eyebrows. Confused and wanting answers, she whirls around--only to find Sam on one knee. A curious smile grows across Brynn’s face as she self-consciously looks around at the crowd of people. “Sam, what are you doing?”

“You asked me earlier on the phone to look at you,” he smiles brightly as his eyes begin to glisten with tears. “I am.” He takes a big breath, gathering courage. “Brynn, I don’t care if we eat gold-infused cake with diamond encrusted icing or that fake shit from the can--” they both begin laughing, welcoming the comic relief as they wipe away their tears. Sam continues, “I don’t care whether you are wearing one of my ratty-old tees or an expensive couture dress--I don’t care,” he kisses her hand. “When I look at you, Brynn Noelle Schuyler, all I see… is that you’re the only one for me.” Brynn genuinely glows, streams of tears pouring down her cheeks as she subtly shakes her head in disbelief. “Marry me--”

“Sam,” she giggles, sniffing away her tears, “I don’t mean to ruin the moment, but haven’t you already asked me--?” Sam stands up, shaking his head. He takes Brynn’s face tenderly into his hands, drying her tears with his thumbs.

“Marry me,” he bites his lip, nervously sucking in air. “Right now.” Brynn’s eyes grow wide as she stares deeply into Sam’s gaze. She anxiously looks around her, her eyes darting to the people staring at them, to the car and then to the courthouse before them.

“Right now?”

“Right now,” Sam smiles, humored by the shocked look on his bride’s face.

Brynn looks down at her hand, staring at the radiant sparkle of her diamond. Chewing on her lip, she subtly nods her head before turning her attention back to her groom.

“Okay.”

***

@ao719 @charlotteg234 @chemist-ana @forallthatitsworth @jerzwriter @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @lovelyladyk88 @lucy-268@neotericthemis @nestledonthaveone @phoenixrising308 @sfb123 @shannonsaid @shewillreadyou @somersetmummy @thefrenchiemama

#the nanny affair #sam dalton x mc #m!sam dalton #choices tna #tna fanfic #choices fanfiction

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astringofmadhousefloozies · 3 years

Text

Surprises

Surprises of all kinds, found after a shopping trip goes wrong. Content warning for coarse language, sexuality, threats of violence, mentions of suicide and incest, and copious amounts of headcanons.

As always, there is more in my Twisted Wonderland Fanfiction tag, and send me a message if you liked it, I crave positive feedback.

~*~*~*~

TXT: where the fuck are you guys it's already quarter past

After a few minutes, you got a ding.

M: idia doenst want t leave something about a person see you aftr he needs freind

Oh goddammit, it's so fucking hard to get him out and about. At least Mal was with him.

You looked to Grim at your feet. "Looks like it's just us, buddy."

~*~*~*~

It was just you and Grim browsing through the dollar store, when a boy in a ratty shop apron came up to you. "Ma'am?"

You turned to him, and he coughed. "Uh, Miss. You're not supposed to have pets in the store."

Grim bristled at him. "I'm not a pet!"

Poor kid, he looked so startled. And you decided to make it worse, because yanno, why not. "How dare you refer to my son as a pet! Does he look like a pet to you?"

He looked between your face and Grim's, confusion growing. "Wh-"

"I know the resemblance isn't the strongest, but honestly! How could you say such mean things about him!"

Grim, bless him, actually caught on and decided to play along for the chaos of it. "Why are you being so mean to me? My mom works hard to keep me happy! She said I could pick out a toy today!"

The confusion had turned to anger. "That's not your kid! You're too young and he's an animal!"

Grim looked up at you, mock tears in his eyes. "I'm your kid, right? I'm not adopted like the boys at school say?" He started sniffling. "I'm not adopted, right?"

You clapped your hands over Grim's ears and glared at the now horrified shopboy. "Look what you've done! I hadn't told him yet!"

He just fled in horror, and it was all you could do to keep from laughing.

~*~*~*~

The village on the island wasn't the worst appointed. Being equidistant between two prestigious magic schools, it had a few places worth going, and after hitting up your personal favourite, you went to a small park, settled down on a bench, and started unwrapping your prizes.

You have a love for gashapon machines that bordered on a serious problem. In your biweekly trips to buy snacks and supplies to stock up your miserable, beautiful dorm, you easily fed 3000 madol (which you think was about thirty-five dollars or so at home, but couldn't be sure) into the long rows of machines in the drug store, coming out with tiny keychains, figures, and various useless but wonderful little totchkes that you kept lined up in rows in your bedroom. The joys of tiny presents! And the containers were useful too; for a creature who heavily insisted he wasn't a cat, Grim lost his shit like one every time your rolled a ball with a bell inside across the floor.

You were marveling over a tiny, perfectly realistic jellyfish on a phone strap as someone sat down heavily beside you. "Is that," they pointed to Grim poking his way around the cattails by an ornamental pond, "yours?"

"... Yes?" You turned to examine your seatmate. Charmingly strange looking, they sat impeccably robed in forest green velvet and squinted at you from behind perfectly round sunglasses. Flat-faced and thin-lipped, they reminded you of a toad, with their roundness and severe expression.

"Ah, then you are the one I am looking for. You're the pet of the prince."

"I'm a friend of his. Is that a problem?" You decided to keep opening your prizes, and pulled out a heavy ball from the bottom of your bag.

"His Highness does not have human friends."

"And yet, I am." This one, unwrapped, was the chase in the set: a tiny cauldron the size of a thimble that seemed to be actual cast iron. The chill of it was pleasant in your hand, and instead of returning it to your bag, you left it in your lap.

This presumptive stranger leaned in. "You're a diversion. A distraction from what he should be learning. Instead he plays with mortals and lets them forget their place."

"If it was so important that he didn't play with mortals, then why was he allowed to attend here?" You got a cheap set of rings on a goldtone chain in this one. Boo. You'd wanted the miniature necklace of the set for your doll. "He's very happy with the company of us all."

"Too happy. He forgets his place." The toady eyed the glittering paste gems before looking away. "Above you. Instead he crawls into your lap and serves you like a dog."

You froze. "Now, where did you get that idea?"

"We have sources." They leaned in further, smiling. A barely perceptible line of triangular teeth, sparsely placed and translucent in tone. "Foul things happen to the unwanted lovers of heirs, don't you know?"

"I am a wanted friend."

"You're a parasite who should flee."

You realized something, and turned to face your strange benchmate. "Why are you threatened by me?"

They scoffed. "Why would we be threatened by you?"

"If you weren't," you said, dropping your voice as your leaned in, "then you wouldn't be here trying to put the fear into me." They leaned back, glasses slipping off their nose. The eyes in their face were exquisite, shining gold and black speckles with a ring of gold around an oval pupil. You could help but laugh. "Pretty eyes. You really are a toad. Who sent you? The Thorn Witch? Can't be, I'm not worth her time and if I was, she'd've sent a fucking letter."

"We're a concerned party, preventing our future king from making the mistake of dealing with filth."

Well, that one pissed you off. You grabbed their wrist, feeling bumps and warts on their skin through the fabric, and pressed the tiny cauldron to the back on their hand as they started screeching.

"You," you looked them dead in their impossibly lovely eyes, "You go back where you came from, tell them I'm not a threat to whatever stupid bullshit they're worried about, and never bother us again. Or I will make you swallow this and you'll beg the precious prince you're so damned worried about to burn you alive to stop the pain."

You'd never seen anyone run so fast in your life when you let them go.

"Hey, Grim! We gotta go."

~*~*~*~

TXT: MAL SOMEONE SENT ME A TOADY SAYING I CAN'T BE AROUND YOU ANYMORE

TXT: MIGHTA BEEN YOUR GMA BUT I DON'T THINK SO

~*~*~*~

"I'm gonna kill that fucker."

"Killing them might start an international incident. If one hasn't happened already. You burnt them with iron, Yuu."

"I should have done worse! Whoever the fuck they were, that's two friends they've tried to threaten to stay away from you! That we know of!"

It turns out that the mystery toady had been the person to scare the piss out of Idia the night before. Not that they'd gotten far into their leave-the-prince-alone spiel, Idia had simply kicked them square in the stomach and fled, assuming another kidnapping attempt.

"It wouldn't have been my grandmother. In the last letter I got from her, she said it was very nice that I was making friends. She said to keep making them, even."

"She'd probably care if she knew you were sleeping with said friends." Idia was curled into the corner of his bed, and from the looks of it hadn't slept since his own encounter.

"No she wouldn't."

"You sure about that?"

You'd said that that was only going to happen once. Everyone agreed. But when all three of you settled in to play a game or watch a movie, hands moved and bodies flushed and you all seemed to find yourself tangled and gasping. And it didn't seem to require all three of you - you no longer had the strength to say no to Mal's obvious advances, and you'd walked in on your boys more than once. At least you were still friends? Really, really close friends?

"She wouldn't."

"Could they be worried about heirs?" That seemed logical. Even if no accidents were happening, they might not know that.

"That's not possible."

You raised an eyebrow. Everything worked right, and you all knew it.

Mal looked back at you. "Yuu, I hatched from an egg. I could have you both five times a day for a decade and all there would be to show for it is you couldn't walk. I cannot have children with either of you without magical intervention."

Idia made a truly impressive death rattle before mumbling something about the end of his bloodline, and you just nodded. "Makes sense."

"It's quite interesting, really, it requires numerous spells and potions, that if not kept up on, the babe will-" Malleus placed his hands together, back to back, and mimed the motion of tearing something open.

You flinched. "That's awful, goddamn."

"I have a direct ancestor who took a great deal of human women as breeding stock and simply let them be eaten from the inside out. That's what started one of the earlier human/faerie wars."

"... Wow."

"I am not proud of her."

"Can we please talk about anything else?" Idia looked ready to be sick. "I don't want to think about any of this."

"Sure, let's grab one of your doujins."

~*~*~*~

"So you're already engaged?"

"As soon as it was clear I would survive to adulthood, yes. Idia, what is this series?"

"Nyan Neko Sugar Girls. It's not that great storywise, but it has great gags." He reached over and grabbed the next one in his pile. "It's not that unusual. My mother wanted Ortho to marry my cousin Alecto when they grew up, before..."

"Before he made a lifestyle change?" That seemed the politest way to put it.

"Before she went to the criminal ward."

You shut your book with a soft thump. "What?"

"I remember the trial." Mal sighed. "Strychnine in the sugar bowl at Sunday dinner. I made sure to get the newspapers sent to the palace."

"Mother was heartbroken over it, until she realized that the wealth of that entire Shroud branch defaulted back to us." Idia shrugged. "It's sad. She was just eleven. I still send her emails."

"Idia."

"Mm?"

"Why the fuck would an eleven year old poison someone?"

"My uncle said she couldn't get a puppy until her grades went up."

"What the fuck." You'd lie down if you weren't already doing so.

"It's the curse." He sighed. "We thought she might've been from an affair? But that proved it."

"My dearest Shroud, you can't guarantee it was from the curse." Malleus turned a page. "It might have been trauma from her mother's death."

You could see more bad history incoming. "Oh no."

"Alecto was from Uncle Jo's first marriage, to my dad's cousin Alita. She had a sister, but when her mother drowned herself, she only took-"

"Is this normal for your family? Or is that just some exceptional bad luck?"

He leaned in, lamplight eyes flashing. "Out of all the Shrouds of my generation that are still capable of inheriting, I'm the most mentally sound."

Both you and Mal had to stop and really consider the implications of that.

"So, Mal. Yours isn't that closely related?"

"Fifth cousins at most when they're finally born."

You sat up. "What?"

"I'm supposed to marry the third grandchild of the Hollyoak Baron. They're a well-respected family, and of snake fae descent so little aid will be needed for conception. His eldest child is in..." He had to think about what words to use. " I believe the term is 'middle school'?"

"They really planned it that far ahead?"

Mal shrugged, the movement rolling down his whole body. "I cannot complain. It gives me a very long time to learn how to be a husband before I have to be one."

"But what if you don't like them?"

"Marriage is chiefly a contract to produce heirs. I'll learn to like them, and ideally love them."

"And if you don't?"

"I'll still treat them as kindly as I can."

"And I suppose you'd take a lover."

"Maybe. They can too, as long as all the children are mine. For legal reasons," he added.

Idia, snapping out of his thoughts, tapped Mal's shoulder. "Does the Hollyoak Baron have any friends who are toad faeries?"

It was Mal's turn to sit up. "That... He could be worried that if I have favourites at school, I'll resent my betrothed for not being either of you. Or that I would attempt to break it off entirely."

"That still doesn't tell us how he found out about..." You gestured around the room.

Idia rolled his eyes. "All that would have to happen is any one student from the Valley of Thorns writing a letter home."

"But -"

"Malleus, you're not shy in your affections. At all."

"Yes I am," he bristled.

~*~*~*~

"Mal?"

"Mmph?"

"You have to put me down. I have class."

He made a slightly different mmph and shook his head.

You tried to pat his head, but your arms were securely pinned to your sides. "I know they're fantastic, but you have to stop."

He still refused to remove his face from your chest, making a noise that could have been purring if it cane from anyone who was a proper mammal.

"Mal, we're blocking traffic."

He still wasn't putting you down, instead swaying slightly in place.

A familiar long-fingered hand with dark nails reached from behind you and tugged at Mal's lapel. "Malleus, please stop, it's ten AM and everyone is staring."

Mal finally put you down - only to switch targets, wrapping his arms around Idia's waist and pulling him flush, fixing him with such a look of besotted fondness that you immediately felt like you were intruding.

"You look beautiful today."

Idia immediately burst into a ball of pink flame.

~*~*~*~

"... Perhaps I am a bit obvious."

Idia stared up at his ceiling. "You'd be at home in my otome games."

You chimed in. "What would be obvious, in your mind?"

"Very easy. I finish the paperwork declaring you Lord and Lady of the Bedchamber and have you officially ensconced as Court of Thorns royalty, ensuring you're both taken care of for the rest of your days."

"... Finish?"

"It seemed the easiest thing to do if either of you chose to visit my homeland."

You swatted his leg. "And you didn't think to ask us first?"

Mal was starting to clue in that he had once again overreached himself. "... Surprise?"

"I'm okay with it."

You glared over at Idia. "That's not the point."

"Look, if I ever get disinherited, I have a place to go. He won't make me go outside if I don't want to. I'll bring Ortho. It'll be great."

"They don't even have dial-up over there, Idia. Lilia told me he had to get all this stuff installed to play his MMOs."

Idia pointed at Mal, easy smile turned to outrage. "How dare you try and trap me!"

It honestly seemed like Mal and Idia had switched expressions, the look of worry on his face so strange. "It's a protective measure! If you're titled, people will get in trouble if they try and remove you!"

"That's still... wait." The gears were turning in your head. "If you finish that paperwork, whoever sent Mixter Toad is going to get in so much more trouble."

Everyone went silent as they considered this.

"... As soon as I get the official permission from my grandmother. She won't like it very much, but if I explain..."

Idia turned to Mal. "You were going to make your human fucktoys official members of the Court of Thorns without telling your grandmother, the queen. Who has a notable and often justified dislike of humans."

"No?"

"Mal."

"I simply prepared ahead."

"Mal."

"I - "

"Malleus." You leaned over and kissed his cheek. "You're so goddamned stupid. Love you."

He didn't say it back with words, but you got the message loud and clear.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland fanfiction #idia shroud #malleus draconia

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duskowithapen · 4 years

Text

Of Flowers and Tattoo Needles Chapter Two

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Read Chapter One

The Flowers

Luka walked into the Secret Garden. Juleka took one look at his face, sighed, and led him towards the backroom. “Be glad I hadn’t had time to take this home,” she grumbled, emerging from the freezer with a tub of caramel ice cream tucked under one arm. After a moment, a spoon appeared under his nose.

Rose looked up from where she was doing paperwork. “What happened Luka? I thought you and Marinette would get along really well!”

With a groan, Luka flopped into a chair. “We were!” He totally-didn’t-whine. “She designed the most kick-ass looking tattoo that was everything I wanted, she gave me the friends and family discount, she didn’t laugh at me when I flirted…”

“Well, that’s an improvement,” Juleka sassed from her own ice cream rub – strawberries and cream, because she was a sap for Rose, who she was intermittently feeding. “But I can’t see the issue…?”

“It was all going well until her boyfriend showed up.” Luka glared over his ice cream. “So thanks for the warning, guys.”

Rose frowned and put down her pen. “What do you mean? Marinette doesn’t have a boyfriend.”

“She was moaning about it during our last girls night,” Juleka interjected. “Talking about how all the guys who came into her shop seemed to be over-muscled sissies who cried the second they saw the tattoo needle.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t know what to tell you. Him and Marinette were definitely close.” Luka was about ready to drown himself in his ice cream. Even the excitement over his tattoo had faded into abject misery. He looked into the depths of his slowly melting ice cream, recalling the last ten minutes with perfect clarity.

Marinette looked like she was going to devour him. Her eyes kept flicking between his, darting down to his lips and back. She had even started to lean in when someone coughed.

“Uh, excuse me, am I interrupting something?” It was a tall blonde, formally dressed in a pressed black suit that made his eyes stand out (yes, Luka noticed. He might have been besotted with Marinette, but he wasn’t blind.) While his question may have been innocent, the smirk that crossed his face wasn’t.

Marinette’s face lit up bright red as she jumped out of her seat. “Adrien! I wasn’t expecting you here till 4.30!”

“Look at the time, buginette. If I’d known you had another client, I would have waited.” Adrien laughed as he wrapped the smaller girl up in a hug, lifting Marinette off her feet.

Luka glanced down at his phone, while Marinette began to stutter out apologies. 4.28. He couldn’t have been a couple of minutes late, Luka thought bitterly.

“I’m really, really sorry Luka!” Marinette had come back, the blonde – Adrien – wandering away to look at dragon tattoos. “I didn’t realise how long I’d spent on your tattoo, and Adrien had been a last-minute booking, so I’d completely forgotten!”

“It’s okay, Marinette.” With an internal sigh, Luka gave her a smirk. “Gives me a reason to come back.”

It seemed to snap Marinette out of her anxious haze.

He didn’t know if it was his words or his smirk, but something snapped Marinette out of her anxious, apologetic haze. Her grin was evil when she stepped into his space. “You needed another reason? I thought you said you were fine with needles.”

Luka’s mouth opened and closed for a moment before he collected himself. “I’m fine with needles if you’re the one poking me with them.”

Whatever Marinette was going to say in return was interrupted, yet again, but Adrien. “Sorry Mari, but I’ve got dinner with Pere tonight, so if I’m getting this tattoo, I kinda need to get it now.”

Adrien was now shirtless.

That’s all Luka could process as Marinette stepped away with another apology.

Adrien was sitting in one of the tattoo stations, jacket and button up slung over the top of the chair. Marinette ruffled his hair as she walked past. “Don’t go rushing an artist, kitty. Otherwise you might end up with something less badass fire dragon and more Mushu.”

“Hey! Don’t go hating on Mushu!” Adrien gasped in faux-outrage, turning away with his nose in the air. “He’s travel-size!”

“Uh huh,” Marinette sighed as she walked back over to Luka. “Anyway, ignore him.” She held out a clipboard with a form on it. “If you just want to fill in your details, I can polish your design after I do Adrien’s tattoo, and then send it through for you to look at. If you like it, I can fit you in…” She paused and walked over to the desk near the door. “Well, I have a cancellation tomorrow morning, and I can get Nathaniel to do Ivan’s tattoo… I can fit you in for tomorrow at nine, if you’d like. If that’s too soon, I have openings next week?”

“Tomorrows fine,” Luka said as he wrote down his email. “And I’m sure I’ll love whatever you send me. Your rough sketch is incredible – I can’t want to see what it looks like in colour.”

The smile Marinette sent him was almost blinding. After Luka handed her back the clipboard, Marinette said goodbye and walked back towards Adrien.

The last thing he saw was Adrien’s smile as Marinette pecked him on the forehead. “Ready to get stabbed, mon chaton?”

Luka refused to look up as Rose and Juleka digested what he just told them. They shared a glance in that way all couples do – like they can communicate via intense eye contact – before bursting into laughter. Well, Rose burst into laughter. Juleka just chuckled and shook her head.

“You’ve got it bad, brother,” She said around a spoonful of ice cream, “It’s almost pitiful.”

Rose poked her with a pen. “Jules, don’t be mean to him!”

A scoff. “I can be mean to my brother as long as he remains a dumbass.”

Luka raised an eyebrow. “Oh really, sister? Do I have to mention the Prince Charming incident?” That had happened back in college, when Juleka had moped for days when she thought Rose had fallen for the foreign prince who she met on his visit to Paris. There had been much relief when Rose had clarified, no, the prince was too male for her refined lesbian tastes.

Alright, Luka had been pretty insufferable then too.

Juleka snapped the lid closed on her ice cream and turned to put it away. “You said that your appointment is at nine, right? Rose, we can open late tomorrow, right?”

“Ooo, yay!” Rose clapped, gathering her paperwork. “I can’t wait to see what kind of tattoo you’re getting Luka!”

“Do I get a choice in this?” He asked with a raised brow.

“No.” And Juleka pulled away his ice cream.

Later that night, Luka opened an email from [email protected]. Hey Luka! I’ve attached the full colour layouts for your tattoo. Can’t wait to see you tomorrow!

He was so glad he lived alone – there was no one there to watch him blush over an email from a girl who may or may not have a boyfriend. Then he looked at the photos. His breath caught.

These are incredible. The image was flat but drawn so that when the transfer paper was wrapped around his arm, the sides would line up. The snake was coloured in various shades of blue, with a lighter sea blue down what could be seen of the spine before merging into a deeper teal green near the belly. The belly itself was a pale yellow, blending in perfectly to the ring of daffodils just above where his elbow would be. As for the flowers themselves, they seemed to pop off the page. Bright blue iris’, with the edges of the petals tinted purple, bold red gladiolus’ with a white outline, pale yellow daffodils with brighter yellow middles… they all emerged from around the snakes body, with the gaps a deep shade of brown – the colour reminded him of his mothers’ mahogany chest – and tiny flickers of pale green leaves creating little spots of calm.

Beside the larger image was a single iris, connected to the main tattoo by two deep brown branches, with a scattering of leaves ringing it. The blues of this flower were paler – closer to the colour of his eyes, Luka realised with a blush – and the purple of the petal’s edges were the same shade as Juleka’s hair. The orange streak down each petal stood out starkly from the rest of the flower.

It was incredibly detailed, and just so much more than Luka ever thought a tattoo could be. He thought back to Rose and Juleka’s tattoos, how lifelike the flowers were, and found that he preferred this saturated, brighter than life version better. It matched perfectly against the calmer tones of the snake and stood out against the dark wood and pale greens of the supporting stems.

He sent back a response before going to bed. Luka couldn’t wait to go to Charmed Ink tomorrow.

This is amazing Marinette! I didn’t think your sketch could get any better, but you’ve blown all my expectations out of the water. Should have expected that such an incredible person can produce incredible art. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow – and get the tattoo.

**************

The next day, a blushing Marinette waved Luka into the tattoo parlour, throwing a glare over her shoulder at where a red head was busy with another customer. “Luka! Hi! I only saw your email this morning – I was too tired yesterday to do much more than send you the design and go to bed.” She hopped up a little on her toes to press a kiss against his cheek, moving away before he could react.

“Rose! Juleka!” Rose was pulled into a hug that lifted the shorter blonde off the ground, while Juleka was greeted with a faire la bise, which his sister returned. “I believe I have you guys to thank for my newest customer!”

“Well if anyone deserves a Marinette Original tattoo, it’s Luka!” Rose chirped, “And he refused to show us the design – I can’t wait to see it!”

Juleka smirked from her other side, and Luka instantly felt on guard. It was never a good think when his sister made that face. “It’s something sappy, isn’t it? Mine and Mum’s name on a ship, or the score for his first song, or his guitar? Gods know he rarely goes anywhere without it – I had to convince him not to bring it with him today.”

Luka raised an eyebrow and wandered closer to Marinette. Her cheek kiss restored some of his earlier confidence, and he leaned into her space a little. “Marinette could make the most sappy tattoo concept into something that could even fit in with your Lady of Midnight, goth chic style. After all,” And here Luka returned Juleka’s smirk with his own, “She managed to turn your love song into a pretty cool looking tattoo.”

There was a hint of a blush on Juleka’s face as she pushed at his shoulder, making him wrap an arm around Marinette’s shoulders so that they didn’t both go over. Her first tattoo idea had been the Always from Harry Potter, surrounded by roses – Rose had always been a big fan of the series, and had actually cried onto Juleka’s shoulder as she read the last book – but when Juleka came back from the design appointment, it had been with the flower wreath concept. It maintained the original intent behind the tattoo – a permanent reminder of Rose’s impact on her life and of her feelings – while being truer to Juleka’s style and personality. Rose had loved it enough to get the same one.

Marinette glanced up at him, not bothering to move out from under his arm, with a mischievous twinkle in her eye. “Ahh, so you’re one of those musicians. Any girl would have to fight your guitar for your affections.”

“With you, Marinette,” Luka said with a wink, “There wouldn’t be much of a battle.”

Another blush bloomed across Marinette’s cheekbones as she stuttered, almost drowned out by Juleka’s fake-gagging and Rose’s squeals. Despite that, it was a nice moment.

Of course, with Luka’s luck, someone had to break it.

The door of the tattoo parlour was slammed open, and a woman with black hair cut in a no-nonsense bob stormed inside, one hand curled around a wooden rapier. Behind her stood the blonde from last night – Adrien – and Luka’s stomach dropped.

“Marinette,” The scary woman started, “What exactly have you been tattooing on my fiancé’s chest?”

#miraculous ladybug #ao3 #fanfiction #of flowers and tattoo needles #lukanette #chapter two #tattoo artist marinette #tattoo artist/florist au

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taeken-my-heart · 4 years

Text

Moirai Chapter 14

Summary: On your 18th birthday a name appears on your wrist. The name of your soulmate. It’s a momentous day that everyone looks forward to, but you’ve always brushed aside; refusing to believe in a fickle mistress called destiny. But what happens when on the morning of your 18th birthday you wake to find the name of your mortal enemy? Jeon Jungkook.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader Genre: Soulmates au/ Enemies to lovers au. Angst, fluff, bickering, romance, eventual smut.

Word Count: 4669

You woke with a start, the room dark but you could hear the birds chirping from outside the window above your head. Glancing around the room, you allowed your eyes to adjust to your unfamiliar surroundings.

“Y/N?” Someone said from outside the door and you sighed, sluggish, into your pillow.

You were at Jungkook’s house. You remembered it all. The fight, the diner, staying the night here. Jimin. You rolled over before slowly sitting up, the t-shirt Jungkook lent you slipping off your shoulder.

“Are you awake?” He called softly from outside the door.

You pushed the covers from your body, moving from the warmth of the bed and towards the door, pulling it open gingerly. You blinked in the light as Jungkook’s eyes came into focus. He scanned you quickly before he flushed, clearing his throat and scratching the back of his neck.

“Ah, you’re awake. I know…I know it may not be the best time, but I thought I’d check.” He paused and you frowned at him in confusion, “Yesterday we all agreed we’d go to brunch today before my parents head home, but I know that after last night you’re probably not in the mood. Did you want me to tell my parents something came up and you had to cancel?”

Honestly, there was a part of you that really did want that; to just get back into bed and curl up in a ball and cry the day away. You couldn’t just lay down and roll over, though. You’d always known Jimin would meet his soulmate one day, you’d just never suspected it would have changed anything.

Now that it had, well…you needed a distraction.

“No,” you croaked, throat dry from sleep. “No, it’s OK, we can still go.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, eyebrows shooting up into his hairline, lackluster with the morning hour and you smiled weakly.

“Yeah, I need something to keep my mind occupied. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say anything to your parents, though…you know, about last night.”

He nodded eagerly, “Yes, of course. Well, we’re meant to meet my parents in two hours so that’s why I wanted to check.”

You nodded, scratching your stomach through Jungkook’s shirt. “Could we maybe send my clothes from yesterday through a quick wash and dry while I shower?”

“Yes, of course. If you just give them to me, I’ll wash them.”

After your shower, you toweled off, dressing back in the clothes Jungkook had let you borrow the night before. You could hear him out in the living room, shuffling noises dulled by the way and the hum of the washing machine. Stepping from the bedroom, you eyed Jungkook from behind as he stood at his bookshelf, back to you and flipping through a book, fingers busy across the pages. His back flexed through the material of his sweater and you watched as his fingers came up to scratch at the hair on the nape of his neck.

Yesterday, you could never have imagined yourself here, but you were comfortable nevertheless. Your heart felt like it had, had a balm spread across it, dulling the pain, at least for a moment. Distraction was exactly what you needed right now. “What are you reading?” You asked softly.

Jungkook jumped, body rocking forward and he braced himself against the bookshelf before turning to look at you, eyes wide. “You scared me.” He chuckled and you smiled.

“Sorry.”

He looked down at the book in his hand, holding it up to show you the cover. Twelfth Night.

“Shakespeare?” You said, moving towards him and he allowed you to take the book from him, flipping through the pages yourself.

“Ah, yeah- I was just kind of skimming the pages. Distraction technique, I guess.”

You looked up at him and he blinked down at you, eyes round with surprise. You hadn’t noticed how close you’d come to stand, but you could almost feel his breath on your face. “Distraction?”

“Uh…yeah, just lots of things on my mind.”

“And Shakespeare helps you clear the fog?” You asked; skeptical. He grinned and you continued, “I personally, feel more confused than ever when I read anything Shakespeare. It’s like trying to read another language.”

He chuckled and leaned back against the TV console to your right. “I find I can relate to this story.”

“You like to dress in drag?” You smiled and his grin grew, “because I’m not judging, you can dress however you like, I just never would have guessed.”

“Ah, as comfortable as it all looks, I’m afraid it’s not really within my field of interests. I do relate to Viola, though.” He held his hand out for the book, which you gave him and he slipped it back on the shelf. You wanted to quiz him further, but just then the washing machine chimed and he made his way out of the room to go shift your clothes into the dryer.

“Ok,” he said, clapping his hands and walking back into the room, “I just set it to quick dry so your clothes should be ready in about 45 minutes. Did you want anything to eat, by the way? I know we’re gonna go eat, but did you need something to tide you over?”

You shook your head as he stood beside the fridge, hand poised and ready on the handle should you say yes.

“I’m OK, thank you. I’m not super hungry yet so I’ll save it.”

He nodded, ruffling his fingers through his hair. “Well, I’m gonna go take a quick shower. You’re welcome to watch TV or do whatever while you wait. Not that you need my company or anything.”

You smile, “Thanks, Jungkook.”

He nodded once before heading down the hallway to his room and out of sight and you retreated to the guest room to grab your phone before heading back out into the living room. Your phone battery was low and would likely die within the next hour. You pouted, sitting down on the couch and shuffling through notifications.

A text from your mom about the wedding, a text from Lizzy complaining about a follow up dentist appointment, an email reminder about your upcoming shift this evening. Nothing you didn’t already know about so you browsed leisurely through your social media until Jungkook returned to the living room.

“Hey, do you happen to have a phone charger that would work with this?” You asked, holding up your phone and he looked towards you, brushing damp strands of hair out of his face.

“Oh yeah, actually. Hold on.”

A moment later your phone was plugged in and charging and you relaxed back into the cushions of the couch. “Thanks again for letting me spend the night. It was needed.”

Jungkook looked over at you from across the island and smile, shrugging. “Don’t mention it. I wanted to help.”

“You’re probably confused, huh? Jimin and I seemed to be doing really well, right?” You stared up at the ceiling, heart swelling bitterly.

You could see Jungkook staring down at the counter top out of the corner of your eye. “You don’t have to share anything, you know?” He said softly and you turned your head to look at him, “I hope you don’t feel like you have to tell me anything you’re not ready to talk about.”

“Honestly, I just kind of want to talk it out.”

He nodded, rounding the counter and sitting in the chair next to the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees. “Lay it on me.”

“You already know he met his soulmate,” you huffed a breath at the ceiling, “but there was more to it than that. He went to the store and I guess he met Taehyung there.”

You could hear Jungkook hum low in his throat but you continued. “Anyway, he’s not stupid and confronted me about who you were. He was pretty mad that I’d lied and hid it, which was justified…but then he told me he’d met Molly.” Frowning, you sat up and turned to face Jungkook, pulling your leg up onto the couch. “He met her on the same day as me. How crap is that? I wasn’t telling him everything, but he was doing the same thing to me!”

Jungkook frowned, ringing his hands together. “It is pretty hypocritical of him to be mad at you.” He admitted.

“I’m really sorry I put you in that situation, though.” You sighed, looking back at him and he looked up at you, shrugging.

“It’s OK, I get it.”

“It’s not OK.” You shook your head, leaning forward, “I didn’t consider you or how you’d feel in that situation. All I thought about was my feelings and I’m sorry; that wasn’t fair.”

Jungkook smiled, “apology accepted. I have a whole list of things I want to apologize about…but that’s gonna have to wait until we don’t have a brunch with my parents.”

You chuckled, wrinkling your nose. “It sounds weird when you say it that way.”

He nodded, standing to go check on the laundry as it beeped and brought your clothes to you to slip into, just in time to leave.

He locked the door to his apartment behind the two of you and you followed down to the parking garage where his car was. “I’m gonna give you fair warning, my parents may ask certain…questions.” He said, belting himself into his seat and you glanced over at him as you fastened your own seat belt.

“You mean about us?” He nodded silently and you pursued your lips. “Honestly, I fully expect them to. I don’t know what to say to them, though. I’m not exactly in that mind frame at the moment.”

“Well, I told them to behave…so hopefully their line of questioning is minor.”

“Either way, we’ll survive.” You chuckled, “it’s not the apocalypse, after all.”

Jungkook laughed and the two of you eased into a comfortable quiet, you staring out the window at your side as the city flew passed.

The restaurant where you were meeting his parents was a small, hole in the wall joint. A soup and salad sort of place with waffles, apparently. It was a little unconventional, but you were hungry and it sounded delicious right about now. The bell above the door jingled to signal your arrival and you looked around, spotting Jungkook’s parents in a small booth on the right side of the restaurant with a window that opened to the alleyway beside it, a beautiful view of the faded red brick wall as your neighbor.

You waved, making your way over to them, Jungkook just behind you and they stood to give the both of you hugs before you all sat down.

“How long have you been here?” You asked, looking down at your watch, “sorry we’re a few minutes late.”

“No worries,” Mrs. Jeon waved you off, smiling over at her son, “we only just got here ourselves. We ordered water all around if that’s OK with you.”

“Perfect,” you nodded.

“You and Jungkook must live nearby, did he pick you up on the way here?” She asked and you smiled tight.

“Yeah, he was kind enough to give me a ride.” You said, folding your hands together on top of the table.

“You guys should tell Y/N about you’re upcoming trip!” Jungkook said quickly.

“Oh, yes please!” You said excitedly, “where are you going next?”

Mrs. Jeon smiled, thanking the waiter as he dropped off their drinks and you suddenly remembered you were supposed to be looking at your menu. After a quick perusal and the waiter jotting down your request, the conversation resumed.

“We’re going to Norway!” She said excitedly.

“I am so jealous!” You sighed mournfully, “I want to travel more.”

“Jungkook loves to travel,” Mrs. Jeon supplied and you could already see exactly where she was going with that topic. “The two of you should go somewhere together, that would be fun don’t you think?”

Jungkook blushed, coughing loudly. “Well, maybe someday a group of friends could go or something. You and Lizzy would probably have a ton of fun.”

“True,” you nodded, thankful for his interjection. “Yeah, Lizzy’s always talked about wanting to go to Bora Bora. She’s a friend from work.”

“Bora Bora would be fun!” Mr. Jeon supplied, “We’ve been to a lot of tropical places recently so now we’re looking at other types of climates. Doing all the things we couldn’t do when this one was a kid.”

He aimed his thumb at Jungkook who grinned, “Sorry I ruined the party.”

“You didn’t ruin the party,” his father chuckled, “It was just a different adventure.”

“We’re lucky we get to have both adventures in life. Raising you and now travel. Do you want to have kids someday, Y/N?” Mrs. Jeon asked suddenly.

“Yeah,” you nodded, sipping at your water. “I’ve always thought 3 kids would be a nice number.”

“That’s a great number!” She smiled, “Jungkook wants three kids too, how lucky!”

Jungkook spluttered, attempting to keep the drink he’d just taken from dripping all over the table with a napkin at his chin. “Mom,” he whined, “come on, let’s not talk about that stuff. New topic, new topic.”

“OK, OK.” She chuckled, grabbing her own napkin and spreading it across her lap. “You know, I remember back when the two of you were kids. There was one day in particular that you’d come over to play, Y/N. The two of you went out and played in the mud. I was so mad because your mother had sent you over in this beautiful baby pink dress, without a change of clothes, I might add. Had to strip you both naked and get you in the bath.”

“Mom!” Jungkook groaned, just as the waitress was beginning to bring out their food.

“I remember that, actually.” You chuckled, thanking the waitress as she slid your plate across the table to you. “You berated Jungkook a lot because you thought it had been his idea to go jump around in the backyard, but actually it was mine. Should have fessed up sooner, but he called me smelly while we were playing and I was vindictive. Sorry, Jungkook.”

“You should be,” he teased, “I cried that night because of you.”

“Aww,” you cooed, bumping your shoulder into his, “that makes me feel bad!”

“Well we were five so it’s fine, I’ve mostly forgiven you by now.”

You laughed loudly, covering your mouth as you chewed your food. “Mostly? Wow, that’s intense.”

“Well, I did get yelled at while naked in front of you, that’s a lot for a man to try to live down.” He grinned and you rolled your eyes.

“Oh please, I bet you don’t even remember it.” You teased, “Just going along with the story to make me feel guilty. Like a lying liar who lies.”

Jungkook exploded with laughter and you tried to smother your grin. You’d always liked the sound of his laugh; loud, obnoxious, and a little bit squeaky. It made you feel happy.

“Anyway,” Mrs. Jeon chuckled, looking between the two of you, “There’s no such thing as confessing too late. There’s always room for redemption.”

She reached across the table, squeezing Jungkook’s hand and you resumed eating. Conversation veered into new topics and you were grateful that they steered clear of the soulmate conversation. It was comfortable to be around them, like going back in time before things were different.

“Make sure you come visit us, soon!” Mrs. Jeon said, once your group had made your way back out onto the sidewalk. She rifled her fingers through her purse distractedly and you smiled.

“I promise.” You said, offering hugs before they got in their car and waved you off.

“I assume you want me to drop you back off at your place?” Jungkook asked softly, and you nodded.

“Yeah, I should get ready for work.”

He held the car door for you and you sat yourself carefully inside, buckling back in. The car was stuffy with summer heat, your clothes clinging in damp places.

“You live nearby, right?” Jungkook asked, sliding into the driver’s seat and fastening himself in before starting the cars ignition.

“Yeah, just a few blocks over. Head right here and I’ll direct you.”

He nodded, tilting the nose of the car back into the road silently. “Thanks for coming to eat with my parents and me. I know they can ask some uncomfortable questions sometimes, especially my mom, but I know they really appreciated you taking time to see them.”

“Of course.” You smiled softly, tilting your head against the head rest to look at him. “It feels like just yesterday we were all having a barbecue at my house; like going back in time.”

“Back when things were simpler.” He agreed, nodding and taking a left when you pointed for it. “Life sure changes a lot, huh? You kind of expect it to as a kid, you know it’s going to, but you don’t realize how much it will. In high school I thought I’d be friends with certain people forever but after graduation it all just changed.”

“Yeah,” you sighed, looking out the window as you entered your neighborhood. “I thought Lillian, Noelle, and I would be friends forever. Lillian and I barely talk anymore, life is just too busy now. She got married a few years ago and I know she had a kid a couple years back, but things aren’t the way they used to be. It’s a little sad.”

“What about Noelle?” Jungkook asked, turning into the parking lot of your apartment complex and putting his car in park.

You shrugged, unbuckling your seat belt. “I don’t know, we haven’t kept up. She moved somewhere overseas after university and I haven’t heard from her since. I hope she’s doing well, I hope she’s happy…but we didn’t keep in contact.” You reached for the door handle, turning to look at him, “Thanks for everything, Jungkook. I should get back inside. I’ve got work in a few hours and I need to get ready.”

The excuse was weak, you both knew it, but honestly you needed time to feel overwhelmed from your breakup before throwing yourself into work tonight and trying to forget everything outside of the hospital walls. You stood, making to close the door behind you before Jungkook called out.

You looked back into the car, unsure of what more there was to even say. “Just,” he sighed, “just let me know if you need anything, OK?”

“Sure.” You murmured before waving and closing the door to his car, making your way into your apartment building.

Your apartment was dark when you made your way inside and you flipped on the lights, heart sinking. It was unreasonable to expect Jimin to be here, of course he wouldn’t be, but your heart had still foolishly hoped.

Most of the apartment looked untouched, but the bedroom was where his absence was most obvious. You couldn’t help the burn in your eyes as they filled with tears, moving around the room as you surveyed what was now absent. The most obvious thing straight away was that his side table was now bare. It had been obnoxiously cluttered since the day you’d first moved into this apartment; filled to the brim with books, his reading glasses, a charger he couldn’t find a place for, and his obnoxiously loud alarm clock in the shape of a bulls eye.

You couldn’t understand why this kept happening to you, why you’d always fall in love with someone that you couldn’t have. Even Jimin, who had hated the idea of soulmates for so long, even he was no match for the pull when it all came down to it.

You laid back against your mattress, grabbing Jimin’s pillow and pulling it to you. It still smelled of him and you buried your face into it and cried. It was like a double edged sword and you sought comfort in the pain it inflicted. You wondered if he was with Molly now, if he’d been happy to move on from your life together and to be with the one he was destined for. You wondered if he just thought of you as a place holder.

Did he pack up all his things quickly? Did he spare even a tear for you or was last night all just a show to spare your feelings? You knew you shouldn’t think these things, but they flooded your mind like a tidal wave; unrelenting and you were drowning. You fell asleep for a couple hours, giving into the allure of your exhaustion before you stood up to shower once more. Your face was puffy from crying and you needed to wash away the evidence. If you were going to make it through your shift then you needed to be able to fake it, crying at work was not something you were planning on doing; you weren’t Karen down at the intake desk.

Walking up the ramp to the hospital felt like walking the plank. Most people wouldn’t ask you about your personal life, they didn’t care enough to do so; caught up in whatever was going on in their own. It was Lizzy you were worried about. She was nosy and a gossip and on top of all of that, she was your best friend. Well, probably your only friend at this point. You had a few friends from university that you saw time to time, but everyone had something to do and you’d grown accustomed to just having Jimin and Lizzy as your “people.”

Maybe you needed to join a club. Making new friends wouldn’t hurt and would probably actually help. You rounded your shoulders, exhaling deeply before making your way inside and towards the locker room. After changing into your scrubs you made your way out to the OR board to check where you’d been scheduled for the evening.

The first thing you had to do was a pre-op evaluation so you made your way down towards the ambulatory sector. The hallways were mostly empty as you made your way down and you felt sluggish in your trip. On your way, you stopped to go over the patients EHR before continuing on. A routine case that would be easy enough to drown your mind in.

“Doctor,” You looked up at the smiling eyes of one of the nurses as you were making your way towards the nurse’s station. “You here for Ms. Laurie’s chart?”

“Yes please.” You said with a nod, watching as she went to grab it. Another nurse nearby was conversing with someone over the phone and you waited, fingers drumming against the countertop. “Thank you so much, Carla.”

Carla shrugged with a smile, “no worries. Your patient is in c14.”

You nodded, flipping through the chart and scanning the notes. Everything you’d already seen in the EHR, but the physical chart gave you room for notes.

Ms. Laurie was sitting up on the bed when you entered, fully dressed and looking like she’d just come in from the streets, purse attached at her hands and she clung to the strap like a life line.

“Hi Ms. Laurie, my name is Doctor Y/L/N, how are you?”

“Amanda, please.” She smiled, reaching out the shake your hand. “I’m OK, pretty nervous, actually. I know it’s a fairly routine surgery, but I’m not good with stress.” You grabbed the wheelie chair from beside the computer, pulling it in front of her and sitting down.

“It’s totally normal to feel nervous, but I’ll be there with you the whole time, monitoring you and making sure you’re safe and as comfortable as possible. I wanna run through some questions with you and I need you to be as open with me as possible, OK? I’m your advocate in the OR and the only way I can do my job to the best of my ability is if I have all the right information.”

Ms. Laurie nodded her understanding, fingers ringing in her lap and you smiled to comfort her. “Full name and birthday, please.”

“Amanda Laurie, May 11th 1993.”

“Great. On here it says you’re allergic to pine nuts and cucumbers, is there anything else I should be concerned about? Any medications? Latex?” She shook her head and you continued, folding one leg over the other. “What about sensitivities? Any to the medication Betadine?”

“I have a sensitivity to gluten, but nothing medication wise.”

“OK, good information. Now, have you met your surgeon yet or been given names and information?”

Ms. Laurie shook her head no, eyebrows twitching up, “the nurse earlier told me the surgeon’s name, but I don’t remember.”

You smiled, waving it off, “that’s no problem; I can remind you. Your surgeons name is Doctor Michaels and she is excellent, one of the best surgeons in the field. She’s really nice and very competent, you’ll be in great hands with her.”

“I doubt you’d tell me if my surgeon sucked.” She chuckled nervously and you grinned.

“We wouldn’t hire a surgeon unless they were really good so thankfully I don’t have to lie about anything. The staff here is great, seriously, we’re going to take good care of you.”

“I appreciate that.”

“OK, now before we proceed, I need you to tell me a little about the procedure you’re getting today.” You moved your chair back just a tad, pen ready and waiting against your clipboard.

“I’m getting a breast biopsy. My doctor told me that I had something weird with my breast tissue or something but he said I’d need to have a surgery.”

“OK, great.” You set your clipboard down on the table, instructing Ms. Laurie to lay back against the bed. “I’m just going to check and make sure that you’ve been marked in the correct location for the surgery, want to make sure everything goes as smoothly as possible. While we’re here, do you have any body piercings in places I can’t see?”

She flushed a little but nodded as you took a look at the sight where she’d be receiving her surgery. Everything checked out so you allowed her to sit up, returning to your own seat. “Yes,” she admitted, “I have a belly button piercing.” “Just the one piercing?” You inquired and she nodded.

“OK, I’ll need you to take that out before the surgery. I know it may seem a little unnecessary since it’s nowhere near the sight, but we just need to make sure that any piercings you may have anywhere are removed, just in case.”

“I understand.” She said softly and you smiled, checking off the rest of your questions quickly before standing once more.

“Great, well Amanda, it was really nice to meet you. I’ll be seeing you again very shortly. Do you have someone who will be here with you after the procedure?”

She nodded, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. “Yes, my mom will be here soon.” She paused a moment before blinking up at you, eyes glassy. “I’m scared, though, doctor.” She admitted and you reached out, taking her hand in her own.

“I understand. It can feel a little scary to do something like this, but you’re being very brave, Amanda. It takes a lot of courage to do what you’re doing, but you know you’re doing what’s best for your health, right?” At her nod you continued, “I’ll be there with you, taking care of you. You won’t be alone. I promise.”

“Thank you, doctor.” You nodded, squeezing her hand before leaving back into the hallway and walking to meet up with your attending.

You wished you could be as brave as Ms. Laurie was, facing hurtles in your life the way she was facing her own. Both Jimin and Jungkook came to mind and you sighed, pulling up the chart once more to make a note. Those thoughts would have to wait.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! We're finally starting to see some character growth and we're really close to JK and YN getting is together and just kissing already! Hahahaha

Let me know what you think, loves <3

Chapter 13

Chapter 15

#btsbookclub #jungkook scenario #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #jungkook angst

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lovemesomesurveys · 3 years

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Do you have any tan lines? Nope. Have you ever wished you could stop time? Yes. I’ve also wished I could speed it up. Is there any pictures on the wall you're in? Yeah, there’s several. Who was the last person who called you? My mom. Did you make any money today? No.

Have you ever fallen and twisted your ankle? No. What was the highest place you've ever jumped from? I haven’t jumped from anywhere. Have you ever gone swimming in a river? No. Ever been so unfortunate to slip on wet rocks? Nope. When was the last time you got completely soaked by rain? It’s been a long time. One of the times that comes to mind is when my mom, aunt, a former friend, and I were at an outdoor festival and we got caught in an unexpected rain storm. It just started pouring down hard and we were not prepared at all. We had to run back to our car, which was parked a good distance away and yeah we were absolutely soaked.

Is there something you really want to buy at the moment? I’d love to be able to book a beach vacation getaway. Would you ever consider culinary school? No. I’m not a cook and have no interest in trying to become one. Do you ever watch the clouds, to see if they look like objects/animals etc? I did when I was a kid sometimes. When was the last time you didn't want to get out of bed? That’s me everyday. It’s a real struggle. Are you excited for anything coming up in the near future? No. My foreseeable future consists of more doctors and appointments and struggles and spending most of my time in bed. Speaking of dancing, do you know any real dance moves? I know them, but I can’t do them. Do you save cards from your birthday/x-mas, etc? Yes. What was the last souvenir someone got you? A shirt. Do you have a favorite remix of a song? One of my favorite covers is Adele’s cover of George Michael’s “Fast Love” that she preformed at an award show in honor of him after he died. I can only describe it as hauntingly beautiful. I really wish she would have released a studio version of it. When was the last time you printed something off? I don’t recall; it’s been awhile. Are you one of those people who can learn music/songs by ear? No, I wish. There was a guy in my piano class I took my senior year in high school that could do that. It was really cool. Has the power gone out recently? No, but I have a feeling it will happen soon. It always does when we have a lot of triple digit degree weather, which is what this week has consisted of. Do you like driving at night? I don’t drive, but I like nighttime drives. Like, whenever I travel I love leaving really early when it’s still dark out. It’s a different experience. Does seeing roadkill make you sad, or just grossed out? Both. Does wearing heels make you feel sexier? I don’t wear heels. What do you think is the most saddest sounding instrument? The piano can sound that way. What day do you go back to school (if you're in school)? I’m forever done with school. When was the last time you've gone shopping with a friend? It’s been a few years. Do you ever go out to dinner with your Mom? We haven’t physically gone out to eat for dinner in quite a long time. What is your favorite kind of salad dressing? Ranch. Have you ever bought fireworks? Not me personlly, but my dad and brother do every 4th of July. Do you really pay attention to the ratings on movies? Sometimes, but I ultimately decide if I want to see it or not. Have you ever snuck in to a theater/dance/bar etc? No. If given the chance, would you go to Ireland? Sure. Who was the last person/website to send you an email? I don’t feel like checking. Has your phone ever rang and scared you? Yeah. I’m such a jumpy person anyway. If you have a cat, does it ever "converse" with you? I don’t have a cat. If given the chance, would you ever fly in a fighter plane like the F-16? No. Are you afraid of standing on the edge of hills/skyscrapers/cliffs etc? Uh, YES. Do you have a favorite species of wild cat (tiger/lion/cougar etc)? No. Do you support the funds designed to protect endangered animals? (Like WWF). I haven’t done much myself to support them, but I’m glad they exist. What type of a drunk are you? (Obnoxious, calm, emotional, violent, etc) I was a chatty drunk. I feel like I was annoying, ha. I was also the sad drunk. Do you have an absolute favorite name (boy or girl)? I love the name Alexander. Are you good at pronouncing foreign words? Uhh, depends. If you're not already, when do you plan on getting married? I don’t want to get married. Can you tolerate the smell of cigarette smoke? Nooo. It honestly makes me sick, like I get lightheaded and dizzy, I get nauseous, and I get a really bad headache. When listening to music, do you usually tap your foot etc to the beat? I sometimes tap my fingers and hands. Have you ever literally cried on a friend's shoulder? No. Was there something that "made your day" today? It literally just turned midnight, so today is just now starting. Do you have a favorite kind of chocolate bar? White chocolate. Are you happy that it's summer? Ugh, no. It’s hot and miserable. Is there anything that you should be doing right now? I’m about to make my nightly bowl of ramen. Has anyone had expectations that you just couldn't live up to? (finishing this a couple hours later...) That’s how I’ve been feeling. Are you currently in a relationship? If so, how long have you been dating? Nope. Would you ever consider being a DJ at a party if you were paid? Nah. Have you ever tried those electric toothbrushes? Wow, this question makes it seem like they’re so futuristic and rare lol. Yes, I use electric toothbrushes. Are you or anyone you know devoted to "being green"? Not overly so, no. When it comes election time, do you vote (if you're old enough)? Yes. What was the last movie you watched that was on TV? I watched Fear 1994 on Netflix recently if that counts. How long have you had an account on bzoink? I don’t have an account on bzoink. Do strapless bras work for you? I don’t like them. I only wear them if I have to, like with a dress. Do you have a favorite hair elastic that you use almost always? No. Has anyone told you that they wanted to marry you/ were planning on it/etc? No. When you were younger, did you have a yoyo? I did. I couldn’t do any tricks, though. What was the last video game you played, if any? Animal Crossing: New Horizons. Has anyone ever called you nerdy? Yeah. Have you ever had to call 911? Yes. Has there ever been a tornado near where you live? No, fortunately. Are you a rollercoaster addict? Noo. I’m a big scardy cat. Do you feel comfortable enough to wear short shorts? No. I’m very self-conscious about my legs. About my body in general, really. If you have iTunes, do you find the Genius recommendations helpful? I don’t even recall what that is; I haven’t used iTunes in almost 10 years. Are you quick at looking up numbers in phonebooks/ words in dictionaries? Phonebooks, wow. I haven’t used a phonebook or actual dictionary in yearsssss thanks to the Internet/Google. Have a favorite actor/actress from Old Hollywood? (Marilyn Munroe, etc) Lucille Ball. Out of Biology, Chemistry and Physics, which are you the best at? None of those. Is there a friend you can always talk to about anything? I don’t have any friends. Can you stand spicy foods? Not anymore. :( It’s gotta have like barely anything like McDonald’s or Taco Bell mild hot sauce type of stuff. It’s wild because I used to be obSESSED with spicy food. I put hot sauce on everything and had a high spicy tolerance. Then a few years ago I developed a sensitivity and I can’t even have red pepper flakes now. It sucks. What's your opinion on people who stretch their ears? Hey, do what you want. I’ll admit the really stretched out lobes freak me out, though. Do you think tattoos are expressive art or unattractive? To me they can be either one, it just depends. What is your school mascot? -- Do you find black and white photos to be pretty? Yeah. Food you make doesn't taste as good as food made by others, true? Sometimes. Especially foods like sandwiches for some reason. I think they’re way better when my mom or a deli makes them. Is there a certain color that doesn't look good on you? I don’t think I look good in anything, so. Have you ever heard anything interesting about Nova Scotia, Canada? Not that I can recall. Have you ever seen a bear in the wild? No, thankfully. Do you know when you will get to see your significant other next? I’m single. What's the book you're currently reading? ”Such a Good Girl” by Willow Rose. Is your room currently a disaster? No. If going to a concert, do you prefer it to be outside or in a stadium? Definitely in a stadium.

Do you have a case for your camera? I use the camera on my phone, which I do have a case for. Can your cellphone take a beating? I’ve dropped it a few times and so far so good. Is there a month you prefer over others? October and December. Do you ever buy lottery tickets? Just a couple of times. Can you recall the most disturbing movie you've ever seen? A Clockwork Orange is one. Are you more of a tape or a glue person? Tape. Of course, it does depend on what I’m doing. In some cases, glue is the better option. Has anyone you know gotten mono? Not that I know of. What is/or was your graduating year? I graduated UC in 2015. Have you had a weird dream lately? All my dreams are weird. Have you ever gotten an autograph from someone famous? Yes. Do you own a pair of slippers? No. Do you ever watch VHS movies anymore? No. I don’t even recall the last time. Has your computer ever decided to completely erase itself? No, but I’ve lost stuff because of viruses back in the day. :(

Only when the power goes out do we realize how much we rely on it, true? It definitely becomes quite apparent quite quickly. Have you ever picked an apple off the tree and eaten it? No. Can you say yes / no in different languages? ”Si” and “No”, ha. Are you good at styling your own hair? No. Especially not anymore since I just don’t have the motivation or energy to do anything with my hair, which is why it was always up in a bun. I finally just cut it really short and have been wearing a cute wig if I go somewhere cause that’s all I can to do right now. I am sad, though. It was so long. Out of the traditional superheroes, which one is your favorite? The Scarlett Witch and Iron Man. What color is the shirt you're wearing right now? Black. Have you ever been lost? Physically and figuratively, yes.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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shadowling-guistical · 4 years

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Milestones

SUMMARY: After deciding to take a gap year, Virgil Sanders expected to enter his freshman year of college feeling anxious and out of place. But not if his childhood friends; Patton Hart, Roman Prince and Logan Croft have anything to say about it.

CHARACTERS: Virgil Sanders/Anxiety, Roman Sanders/Creativity, Logan Sanders/Logic, Patton Sanders/Morality, Thomas Sanders (mentioned/background), Remy Sanders (Mentioned/background) Dr. Emille Picani (Mentioned/Background).

PAIRINGS: Platonic LAMP but can be romantic if you squint and sorta tilt your head to the left.

CONTENT/TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of therapy and medication. Discussions about university related stress

Read an extended version on AO3.

For @sanders-sides-fanzine‘s The Core of Us Fanzine! If you enjoyed this, consider downloading the zine (which is FREE!) and give the team and contributors some love!

It was, by all means, a normal summer day for one Virgil Sanders. He woke up, had breakfast, took his meds and logged on to chat with his close friends. That is, until his mother told him he had mail before she headed out to work. She had kissed him on the top of his head, as if she didn’t just send a jolt of electricity striking through his heart, oblivious as she handed him money to share with his siblings.

He excused himself from their voice chat and went down to retrieve it. As though psychic, each of his friends wished him luck in their own ways. They gushed and reassured him in their group chat while sending something totally separate in the Direct messages. Patton sent him a wholesome, motivating meme. Logan sent him a single question mark. Roman began blowing up his direct messages with fragments of excited texts. He in particular was excited for Virgil to finally join them in campus after taking a gap year for mental health reasons.

He passed by his baby brother watching his morning cartoons. His middle brother, Remy was probably still asleep. Virgil ruffled Thomas’ hair as he retreated back to his bedroom.

A whirl of emotions settled in his stomach after Virgil closed the door behind him. It began settling into a poisonous miasma of nervousness and dread, both very hot and very icy.

Virgil slid a nail edge under the flap- tearing it open. He took the contents out, scanned the words and-

…

“…Oh…”

His status soon went from online to idle and finally, offline.

That night, Patton spent his evening fretting over the lack of a reply. Where was the usual emoji of a purple heart? Frustrated, he finally stopped pacing around his room long enough to go down to the kitchen. His freckled face screwed in determination while he took out his mixing bowls. Now, what was the recipe for chocolate brownies again?

Logan waited with bated breath for that single exclamation point. Over the next few hours, he forced himself to calm down. He reminded himself that Virgil probably needed logic and reason the most at this moment. He put away his phone and began looking up the procedure for an admission appeal. The date shouldn’t be too far away, right? Or perhaps another institution nearby?

Roman found himself wishing for a snarky reply about how much they will be seeing each other on campus. He waited as time stretched out to midnight and beyond. Before he slept, he made a mental note to find his copy of Black Cauldron amongst his extensive collection of Disney Movies. A Disney movie night never failed to cheer his friend up!

Next mid afternoon, Virgil found himself nervously tapping his feet as he waited for someone to pick up the call he was making. He spent earlier that morning in his regular therapy sessions with his therapist. Virgil mainly talked about his current development of events. Doctor Picani had advised him to talk to his support system about his fears, and to be open to them. And that was what Virgil was attempting to do.

"Hello?? Virgil?"

Virgil swallowed, throat suddenly dry.

"Hey Pat… um…"

Patton, bless him, patiently waited for Virgil instead of bombarding him with questions.

"Take your time kiddo. Roman and Logan are with me, do you want this to be on speaker?"

"Yeah, Pat… That'll uh… That'll be swell."

Great. Might as well get this over with. There was a click and Virgil can hear rustling from the other line.

"Virgil," He heard Logan speak in his calm timbre, "Are you well?"

"Yeah I am actually… just ...well," A deep breath, "I got accepted Lo."

"Ah… Congratulations!" Logan sounded sincere, while there was a flurry of voices in the background. Probably Roman and Patton being excited.

"Thanks Lo…" Virgil sat down on his bed heavily.

"You don't sound so happy about it, J Delightful. You didn’t even came back to talk to us yesterday,”

"I am Ro.. I am… But… God. I’m sorry for being a jerk. When I read the letter. I was…happy. But…"

"…You panicked?"

"... Yeah…" Virgil mumbled, beginning to rub his eyes, "And it's not even because I'm struggling. Dr P and I are doing great! My meds are fine. He's teaching me how to deal with everything… But I still feel…"

"Unprepared…?"

Patton's calming voice sort of broke something in him, and Virgil felt his throat close up and his eyes water.

“…Scared…"

"Oh kiddo…"

"Virgil…You know that you don't have to go now. There's always the option of delaying or opting to start at the second intake,"

"I know that Lo…But I really want to go NOW. But ugh…" Virgil let himself fall back onto his bed and sniffed, "I just got so overwhelmed. Thinking of the things I need to pack, classes, paperwork…Picking a major. Where do I even BEGIN?"

"We understand. Look, me and Specs need to go soon. How do you feel about Patton coming over to keep you company? We’ll handle the other stuff later. Together."

"That's right Kiddo! I have some brownies here with your name on em!"

Virgil wiped his eyes with the edge of his hoodie sleeve, "That sounds… amazing, Pat. You'd do that?"

"In a Hart-beat," The pun made Virgil smile. "And if you want, I can help you find some on campus resources. The counselling department has some amazing counsellors,"

Virgil took a deep breath, and exhaling slowly, "... Yeah.. I think I'd like that…Thanks Patton"

"Excellent. I shall look up other relevant information for a later date."

"Right…" Virgil agreed, "Thanks L...Princey. I appreciate it a lot."

"Anything for our emo."

"See you soon Virgil!"

The next few days passed by like a blur. It was all hands-on deck, with Patton, Logan and Roman helping him in all matters big and small.

Patton came by, gave him a hug and fed him the brownies. Later, he sat with Virgil in front of his computer, guiding him on all the resources available on campus. After a while, Virgil found himself mulling very little as he sent an email to a counsellor on campus to set up an appointment. In fact, he daresay he started to look forward to it. Patton was there throughout the whole process, just generally providing the best help he could have ever asked for. Virgil asked him questions extensively, and Patton patiently answered each and every one.

His support and help prompted Virgil to later wear a small enamel badge he found while browsing a thrift store. It reminded Virgil that there are people looking out and supporting him at every turn in his life.

With an appointment with a counsellor now booked, Virgil turned his attention to his classes. In this area, Logan came in- keen and determined.

Armed with several sheets of printed out information, he came to Virgil's house the night after Patton left.

He explained Virgil's options, going through one suggestion at a time. He reassured him about choosing his major, telling him that he can remain undeclared as long as he needed to. But also to be mindful about what classes he decides to take. Highlighter in hand, they slowly but surely mapped out the classes Virgil could register in his first year. It was balanced in that it both provided enough time for him to settle in his new environment and for Virgil to still get the credit hours he needed.

It was because of Logan that Virgil started carrying with him a small nondescript journal. He wrote everything in it, from reminders to To Do lists. It helped him plan, and made him recall Logan's words that learning is always something that Virgil has control over.

Roman literally came in full force. Barging in early one morning and boisterously announcing his arrival to help him pack. Surprisingly, he was very helpful. He took the time to help Virgil organise everything and all the while, they just… talked. They bantered and joked. Each day, Roman never failed to show up. He skillfully took Virgil's mind of the stress of moving away as the date crawled nearer. He talked about the plays that will be put on that semester, promising to introduce Virgil to the cast and crew. Remembering their high school days, Virgil promised to consider trying out as the crew and Roman smiled encouragingly, saying nothing more.

And if Virgil started wearing a little red in any instance where he needed a boost of confidence, Roman didn't need to know that too.

Virgil admitted he took a little while to get to certain milestones compared to his peers. But as Roman's car began to move away from their neighbourhood, Logan's GPS pre-set to Florida University and Patton's brownies started being passed around, he realized that taking his time was well worth it.

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fresh-outta-jams · 5 years

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Signed, Sealed, Delivered - Part 12

Namjoon x Reader Author: Admin Mo Summary: You’re in college when your soulmate tattoo shows up, an address. You figure it couldn’t hurt to send a letter, right? Note: I’m so excitedddddddd oof here we go, y’all. Warnings: Some swears, soulmate fluff. Word Count: 3.5k

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, Epilogue

Nervous didn’t even begin to cover the emotions coursing through Namjoon’s body. He was terrified, excited, elated to be getting on the plane, and as soon as he sat down, it all sank in. The next time he got out of this plane, he would be in your state, and then soon after, in a car on the way to your school, and then even sooner after that, he’d have you in his arms, smothering you with kisses and affection. God, it was almost enough to make him pass out.

It had been a while since he’d flown somewhere alone, Namjoon reminisced. He missed the chatter and laughter of his brothers, filling the plane. Instead, sitting in First Class alone, he had to turn to his phone and computer for entertainment. He’d told you a few hours ago that he’d broken his phone, another lie, and that he wouldn’t have it for the rest of the day until it got fixed, so the two of you wouldn’t be able to FaceTime. And, if the problem arose, he’d lie to you about his webcam being dysfunctional too. It was a fourteen-hour flight and you couldn’t have any idea he was on the way, if he wanted the surprise to pay off.

Lily and Grace had offered to keep an eye on you, making sure you stayed at the library, which was where he planned to meet up with them, and therefore, you, when the time came. God, thinking about it made his heart race.

After this flight, he’d be with you. After this flight...He’d. Be. With. You. It was going to drive him mad. Figuring his best bet to pass the time was sleeping, Namjoon lowered his seat and pulled his Koya sleeping mask down over his eyes, his headphones playing something soft and romantic. He had no idea how he would ever be able to sleep when something so exciting was waiting on the other end of that dreamy tunnel for him, but he figured he’d have to if he didn’t want the minutes to crawl by.

So, he let his breaths slow, and he let the music carry him off to a happy place filled with coffee shops and a girl with pink hair and a camera.

***

You were decidedly itchy. No, maybe itchy wasn’t quite the right word. You were antsy, more like it. It was seven. You’d just woken up from a very odd dream about an airplane, which you’d written off as anxiety about your upcoming first flight.

Today was Monday, the first day of exam week, which certainly contributed to your itchiness. And once you unlocked your phone to scroll through the night’s notifications, you got some more answers as to exactly why something felt off.

Unknown Number: Hey jagiya! It’s Namjoon! Your clumsy boyfriend dropped his phone, so I won’t be able to text or call you today. I’m sending this from Hobi’s phone. I just wanted to let you know that I love you so much and I’ll talk to you tomorrow! Have a good day studying for your exams. I know you’ll do well! Fighting!

It was sweet, very sweet. How thoughtful of him, to send you a message instead of leaving you to wonder if your amazing wonderful boyfriend was ignoring you. But that was what Namjoon was: thoughtful. And yet, something still felt off about it, yet you couldn’t put your finger on it.

So, you sat up, stretched, hung your sleeping mask on its designated Command hook, and started down your ladder to begin one very uneventful day of studying.

***

You were a strong believer in study breaks. Cramming without stop always made you more frustrated than anything else. So, every couple of hours, you took a thirty-minute break to talk to the other two friends who had come to cram with you. Well, at the moment, it was one. Lily was taking her Psychology exam, so that left you with Grace, who had her nose in her American History book, jotting notes down in her red, white, and blue notebook.

When she looked up, and caught your gaze, she set down her textbook and smiled, stretching. “Break time already?”

“Yeah, it’s like three.”

“Holy shit that went by fast.” She checked the time on her phone only to find that what you’d told her was accurate. And also, she’d received a DM from your soulmate, the one person you could not know she was messaging. She snatched up her phone as quickly as she could.

Your eyes narrowed suspiciously, that sinking feeling you’d been harboring since this morning returning in full force. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” She blurted too quickly, clearing out her notifications, and with them, any remains of Namjoon’s message. “No, I just, uh, my professor emailed me a study guide and I really needed it.”

“Oh, that’s good…” You nodded, attempting to take a sip from your now-empty glass of tea. Luckily for you, you’d been saving up your meal dollars, so you had enough money for all the tea you could ever drink...and then some. And, in addition, you had to spend all of them before the school year ended, so you figured you may as well use them.

Standing up from the table, you grabbed your empty cup and tossed it in the trash, walking up the stairs to get another one from the tea place on the second floor. While you were gone, Grace unlocked her phone and opened Twitter. It was Namjoon, of course, messaging in the group chat he’d started with Grace and Lily.

RM_fan_94: Around five or six hours left on my flight. How are things going? Is she okay?

GracieGirl: She’s fine, Namjoon. She has consumed around six cups of tea since we’ve been here, tho. Your girl has a problem…

RM_fan_94: She sounds like me with coffee haha

RM_fan_94: Do either of you have tips for when I get there?

GracieGirl: I’m going to send you navigation from the entrance of the school to the library, but besides that, it should be fine. We’re sitting in this little area on the bottom floor.

GracieGirl: It’s her favorite spot, so there’s no way we’re moving.

GracieGirl: Plus, this place is full bc of exams, so we couldn’t really move if we tried.

GracieGirl: Once you get here, go through the door on the front of the building (facing the giant bird statue) and go down the stairs. It’s basically impossible to miss her. She has hot pink hair.

GracieGirl: Also, she’s wearing a BTS shirt.

RM_fan_94: Awwwwww that’s my girl.

Lilyyyy: Exam is FINISHED!! Operation Babysit (Y/N) Commences!

RM_fan_94: I hope you did well!

Lilyyyy: Omg where did she find you? You’re so perfect?? And sweet?? Did she make you in a lab??

RM_fan_94: Probably haha omg. But no, after many debates over the topic, I’ve concluded that she is the perfect one in this relationship. I’m just her hype man.

GracieGirl: Oooookay, Mr. Superstar, whatever you say.

Lilyyyy: Y’all are cute as fuck. I can’t wait for tonight!!!

Namjoon paused for a while before he typed out his next message, sighing to himself as he laid his head back against the seat again.

RM_fan_94: Me either…

***

You sat at the table, drilling film terms until your head started buzzing.You had watched your project so many times, you couldn’t stare at the editing program for another second, or you were sure you would go insane. So, instead, you were studying for your Film Analysis class, reteaching yourself about motifs and mise-en-scene and all of the other terms from the beginning of the semester that had been buried by all of the new things you’d learned thus far.

You still felt itchy. Maybe moreso now than when you had woken up, but itchy nonetheless. It was an odd feeling, like something was hanging over your head, something real and heavy and dropping fast. And yet, the more you thought about it, the less it made sense. Nothing was happening. You were fine. Everything was fine. It was just stress. Yes, of course, that’s what it was. Stress. Logical.

The only thing hanging over your head was your exams and the upcoming flight to Korea. That’s all it was, and it made perfect sense.

You sighed and checked the time on your phone. It was six, and you were hungry. You’d had a muffin for brunch and nothing since then. Time for a break, then. You got up and both Grace and Lily looked, wide-eyed.

“Where are you going?” Lily blurted when she saw you grab your keys.

“I’m hungry.”

“Oh. Gotcha. I’ll come with.” Lily offered, picking up her keys too. “If we take the tunnels, we don’t even have to go outside.”

“That is a good point.” You agreed, waving to Grace, the appointed guardian of your things for the time-being, seeing as she had grabbed food thirty minutes ago while you and Lily were busy working.

The two of you walked through the library and through the tunnels that connected the learning center to the building next to it, where there was a selection of fast food places. You got in line at the sandwich place and scrolled through Twitter, your thumb moving to send something funny to Namjoon until you remembered, stopping in place, that Namjoon’s phone was broken.

Your heart sank a little, but you saved the link so you could send it to him later.

“You okay?” Lily nudged your arm and you nodded. “Something wrong?”

“Namjoon broke his phone, so I can’t talk to him…” You sighed. “But I’m glad he told me. Is it weird I miss him? Also, I’m itchy.”

“You’re...itchy?” Lily giggled. “You might want to get a cream for that, sweetie, I don’t know what else to tell you.”

“I know, it’s weird.” You agreed, laughing with her. “I don’t know. I guess it’s just nerves from...everything, you know?”

“Yeah, I think I kind of get that.” Lily nodded. It was a good thing you were busy with your phone or you definitely would have noticed the knowing smile blooming across her features. If only you knew what was in store for you in two short hours…

***

When Namjoon got off the plane, he was shaking. Every part of him, trembling in anticipation. He fumbled with his suitcase, struggling to get it out of the luggage check without dropping it. His heart raced. He was here, like twenty minutes from your school, and as soon as his Uber texted him, he’d be on his way.

Namjoon reached into his pocket to check the time. It was around eight, so according to your friends, you’d still be in the library by now, but he figured he’d better send a heads-up just in case. His fingers were shaking almost too much to punch in the message, but somehow, he managed, pressing send after reading over it once or twice.

RM_fan_94: Just landed. Uber should be here soon. I’ll be there twenty minutes after that. Keep her busy.

His face was flushed, heart pounding, banging against his ribcage in hopes to escape and run down the street to find you. God, you were so close. You two had never been this close. There had almost always been an ocean between you, at least, since you’d started communicating. And now, all that was standing in his way was a car ride. Namjoon almost couldn’t stand it.

So, nervous as all hell, Namjoon started pacing in the lobby of the airport until he finally got the notification and went sprinting for the front doors and into the van of his Uber driver.

Every atom in his body was buzzing, buzzing, buzzing and burning as he got closer and closer to the gates of your college. He read the signs on the side of the road. Twenty miles turned to ten, which turned to five. Namjoon felt dizzy, suffocated by his rapidly-approaching destiny. He was sprinting towards it, now, a handful of miles standing between him and the love of his life.

In the passing streetlights, Namjoon could make out the lettering on his wrist. The tattoo that had started this all. He remembered his excitement the moment his fingers brushed against your first letter and the words tingled into existence on his skin. He remembered when all he had to go on was a name and the fact that you were from the States. He remembered the overwhelming joy that washed over him when you sent him the first picture of you, dressed up as Wonder Woman and smiling like you didn’t have a care in the world. He remembered your first phone call, the way his veins pulsed when he finally heard your voice.

All of it was coming to a peak, now. The precipice. This was the beginning of something very new, something uncharted for himself and the rest of the members in BTS.

Without warning, his Uber driver reached the traffic light to turn onto campus. It flicked from red to green, and he drove across the halted lanes of opposite traffic, under the giant arch that marked the beginning of your school. This was it. There was no going back now.

***

Something was wrong with Lily and Grace. They were acting weird. Both of them had gotten a notification from some mysterious group chat, and now neither of them could look you in the eye. It was odd, to say the very least.

“Everything okay?”

“Yep! Just peachy!” Grace lied through her teeth, beaming at you innocently. Something very, very strange was afoot, but you were too burned-out to attempt to get to the bottom of it.

So, seeing as your drink was empty once again, you stood up and began the trek to the tea store up the stairs.

“Where are you going?” Lily asked, almost shooting up out of her seat.

“I need more tea.” You shrugged, looking from Lily to Grace. “I’ll be back in like five minutes tops.”

“Okay.” Lily nodded, walking to the bathroom to cover up the fact that she’d shot up so fast to attempt to stop you.

Shaking your head at the strange behavior, you finished walking up the steps and stood in line at the tea store, ordering yet another iced drink. By this time, the barista didn’t even need to ask. It only took him a few minutes to get your drink to you and then you were on your way back down the stairs to the table. You were sitting down when your phone rang with a call...from Namjoon. Your eyebrows furrowed until you realized it was like ten in the morning in Korea, so his phone must have gotten fixed.

Brightening immediately, you picked up.

“Hey babe! Did you get your phone fixed?”

“I did…” His voice sounded weird. You could hear his tone and his breath shaking with each word. “Good thing, too…”

“Joon, is everything okay?”

“Great, baby, everything is great. Super, super great. I just...God…” And then he hung up, his connection cutting out, assumably. Your eyebrows furrowed, waiting for him to call back, like he usually did when your Skype calls cut out, but he didn’t.

“Something wrong?” Lily asked, almost unable to hide the grin on her face. Grace subtly held her phone, obviously recording. She had been since you got back with your tea. And yet, your head was buzzing too much for you to notice.

“I think his phone cut out.” You said softly, staring at the screen as you contemplated calling him back. You waited for a few more seconds before you noticed someone standing at the bottom of the steps. He was tall, his long frame dressed in an oversized black shirt and ripped jeans, tufts of pink hair sticking down out of his black baseball cap.

Maybe it was the pink hair that caused you to look back down at your work for a split second before your heart lurched and you did a double-take. You studied him, frozen and wide-eyed. You urged your legs to get up so you could get a closer look, but they weren’t listening.

You put your hands on the table, pushing yourself to a standing position as Lily and Grace giggled. Your legs wobbled with each slow step over to him. He was frozen, too, an amused grin on his face as he watched the wheels turn in your head, dimples on full display.

“N-Namjoon?” You whispered, tears fogging up your vision. You covered your mouth with your hands, taking a step forward and then a little step back, still unsure if this was actually happening or if it was some cruel hallucination, cooked up by twelve hours of staring at a book and taking notes.

“It’s just me, baby.” He reassured softly. “I’m right here.”

That was all the reassurance you needed. He set down his duffle bag and opened his arms, waiting for your legs to finally get the message from your brain. Eventually, they did, and you broke into a run, closing the distance between you until you were jumping into his arms, legs wrapped tight around his hips. One of his large hands came to rest under your thigh, and the other fastened around your back, rubbing comforting circles as your floodgates finally opened, a cascade of tears following.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” He tried to hush your sobs, but he realized after a few seconds that he was crying too.

“How did you get here?” You croaked. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to come surprise my girl.” He chuckled softly, happy tears rolling down his cheeks. “I knew you’d need a little pick-me-up for exam week.”

“So you just came at the drop of a hat?”

“This has been planned for months, baby. It’s all worked out, I promise.” Namjoon was still holding you, your legs firmly gripping his waist, but he pulled away to look at you up close. You were the most beautiful person he’d ever seen, even with trails of black mascara running down your cheeks. “God, you’re so beautiful.”

“I look like a mess.” You shook your head, chuckling at how much of a disaster you probably looked on today of all days. Of course on the one day that mattered, you looked like you’d just been hit by the bus.

“Baby, you’re the most beautiful person on the planet.” Namjoon pressed a long kiss to your forehead, closing his eyes before murmuring, “You look perfect, always. I love you, jagiya.”

“I love you too.” You took a moment there to look at him, to really look at this man who held the other half of your soul in his heart. You raised your hands to his cheeks and gave his dimples a pinch, earning a laugh from him. “You’re real…”

“Weird, isn’t it?” He raised an eyebrow. He couldn’t count how many times he’d heard that from ARMYs all over the world. Although, it was never as tender or careful as this statement.

“Mmhmm.” You hummed, studying his features up close, squishing his dimpled cheeks together. “Joonie?”

“What?”

Your eyes lingered on the pillows of his plush lips. They were calling to you. “I want to kiss you.”

“Then kiss me.” He replied, leaning in slowly to meet you in the middle. It was electric, sparks flying the moment your lips melted against his larger, warmer ones. You almost forgot you were in public until you heard cheers from all of the other brain-dead students flooding the library currently. Blushing, you reluctantly pulled away from Namjoon, finally unwrapping your legs from his hips and settling yourself back on the floor.

“Was it worth the wait?” You whispered, taking his hand and leading him back over to where your grinning friends had pulled up a fourth chair.

“I would wait a hundred years for you if I had to.”

“You’re cheesy.” You scrunched your nose and looked up at him. You knew all along that he would tower over you, but up close it was entirely different. Namjoon seemed to notice too, as he looked down on you gingerly. He leaned forward and pressed another lingering kiss to your forehead, pulling you against his chest.

“So are you.”

“That’s fair.” You giggled into the fabric of his shirt before finally sitting down with him. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you no matter how hard he tried. But eventually, he did turn to give his thanks to Lily and Grace.

“Thank you, ladies. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

“Don’t mention it.” Grace smiled. Lily nodded in agreement.

You, however, looked between the three of them with wide eyes. “You knew???”

“Explains a lot, doesn’t it?” Lily chuckled, shrugging as she got back to her studying.

“Congratulations, you two.” Gace bidded before slipping her headphones back over her ears.

Namjoon took your hand in his own, scooching his chair closer to yours. He studied your little fingers with a smile before bringing your hand to his lips and kissing it. This, he imagined, was what the rest of your little forever looked like, and he wouldn’t have it any other way...

Tagged: @iie-wakarimasen , @ffantasylandd, @jooniefluff, @chimchimsauce, @mrs-saeyoung-choi, @theprinceoftheundead, @angyexoxo, @copenhagenspirit, @lovelylittlekittn, @lilgaga98, @iminlovewjjk, @feed-my-geek-soul, @loveandwitch, @recoveringflowerchild, @demonic-meatball, @maddieisaacs, @scissorsandtonfas, @carirosesg, @backtonormalthings, @local-mochi, @faliwi, @spoopyela, @nanie5, @ingenu--e, @undiscovered1personality, @andalos, @calspixie, @filtermono, @huhuehuey, @mikey-girl12, @lilliaflurr, @hypophrenium, @sitkafay, @spiicyari, @andeerwilson, @btswerewolfaus, @oyasumi7, @mycurrentusernameisalreadytaken, @gangstavixsta

#armyofwriters #kpopwonderlandtag #namjoon #namjoon x reader #namjoon imagine #bts #bts imagine #fluff #soulmate au #bts soulmate au #rm #rm x reader #rm imagine #signed sealed delivered

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sarcasticfina · 6 years

Text

pampered - 1/1

for: @laurenlikesstuff for her donation prompt: Darcy gets the love and respect she deserves/acknowledgement from the team/SHIELD/whoever

Exhausted did not begin to cover how Darcy was feeling. Don’t get her wrong, she loved working for Pepper and the Avengers, but there were days that she seriously regretted not still being the lab monkey that trailed behind Jane, trying to keep a cap on her crazy and encouraging her to meet basic hygiene requirements. She still managed to visit her friend in the labs, and she checked in with Ingrid, Jane’s new flunky, to make sure Jane was being taken care of, but Darcy’s primary job was acting as the ringleader to the Avengers media interactions. That meant keeping an eye on the social networking sites (or, in Tony’s case, locking him out of his Twitter account whenever he was on a 3+ day brain binge). It also meant setting Steve and Barnes up with someone who could fill in the blanks on history and social media. Steve was a quick learner, and had done much of the work before Darcy had been hired on, but Barnes a blank slate in a lot of (very sad) ways.

For a lot of reasons, Darcy loved her job. The people she worked with, while frustrating, were good people, and she considered most of them her friends. It was hectic, though. Corralling a group of people that were used to being independent, often working in the shadows and far from the glare of public opinion, was no easy job. There was a lot of arguing, and sometimes she felt they disagreed just for the sake of it. Or, when it came to Tony, pushed her buttons just to see how long it took to make her blow up.

She got it. They didn’t want to spend what little down time they had playing nice for the cameras. Even Steve, who wanted to do what he could to positively influence the younger generation, put up a fight after a while. Then again, those high school PSA’s were terrible and the forced smile he fed the camera after the first handful only became more and more obvious. But, this was her job, and there was a reason for it.

If they wanted to keep doing what they were doing, then they had to work on their public image, but when there wasn’t an intergalactic war happening in the middle of downtown, people were quick to wonder if the Avengers were all that useful. And considering the history that some of them had racked up, between brainwashing and both on-the-book and off-the-book assassinations, having the public on their side helped to keep the government off their backs. Telling them that eventually got old, but it was the truth.

As much as Darcy wanted them to keep operating in the capacity they were, strings had to be pulled and palms needed to be greased. Which was where she came in. Only, she was tired. She was always tired these days. In a lot of ways, her job was thankless. She appreciated the paycheck; Pepper made sure she was paid handsomely for her work. But being on top of the team was a 24/7 job and not in a fun way. She was only getting five hours of sleep on a good night, she was always eating on the go—literally, she ate take-out while going over her schedule with one of her three assistants last night— and any chances of a social life were laughable. Her phone was constantly going off with the latest fire she had to put out and what little time she did have that wasn’t spent trying to sleep, she ended up in Jane’s lab, listening to her babble about her latest act of genius. Not that she hated that, she was proud of Jane and everything she’d accomplished. She was just getting… Well, lonely. The team were good people, but ninety perfect of her interactions with them ended with complaints and a compromise.

When she walked into her apartment, she had her shoes in one hand while the other rubbed at her shoulder, where a knot was quickly forming. She wanted to shower, but with her eyes quickly closing, she figured she might have to put it off until she woke up. Just as the door closed behind her, her phone started buzzing demandingly. Darcy wasn’t too proud to say that her eyes watered. She was so, so tired. Turning her phone over, she squinted at the screen, and found Pepper’s name staring back.

Sighing, she answered it. “Pep, hey. Any chance you’re calling to read me a bedtime story?”

“Not quite. Listen, I’m going to be in town tomorrow and I’d like to meet. My office? 8 am. Does that work?”

Darcy checked the time. That gave her six hours to sleep, shower, and get her ass across the facility. “I can do that.”

“Great. And sorry for calling so late, Darcy. Get some sleep.”

“On it. See you tomorrow!”

After hanging up, she dragged her feet on her way to her room. Falling face first on her mattress, she sighed. Eventually, she would have to crawl up her bed, plug in her phone, and, if she wanted a good sleep, change out of her clothes. But ‘eventually’ would be eat least five minutes of her arguing with herself over how much energy that would take.

Darcy drank her morning coffee in the shower. She also brushed her teeth and shaved her armpit at the same time; no lie, she was a little proud of that skill. By the time she was out of the shower and dressed, she was ready to face whatever monumental fuck up had her being called to Pepper’s office. As much as she could blame, and thank, Pepper for her job, they didn’t often get a chance to interact. Pepper was a busy woman and, obviously, so was Darcy. Which meant that there was either some grenade-sized scandal she needed to throw herself on or she’d fucked up somehow and Pepper was firing her.

In either case, Darcy planned to go in with her head held high and her best heels on display. She’d put her blood, sweat, and tears into this job. She was proud of the work she had done. And she was willing to fight for her position, or the team, whichever outcome was waiting for her.

Making her way into Pepper’s office, she found her standing at the window, her hair down and her clothes far more casual than Darcy was used to.

“Hey…” Darcy’s brow furrowed, hesitation coloring her voice and expression. “You wanted to see me?”

“I did. Yes.” Dropping a file on her desk, Pepper smiled and crossed the room toward her. “I’ve set you up for an appointment at The Surrey. The works. Anything you want or need, it’s on me. After that, I thought we could get lunch. I already okay’d it with Natasha, Maria, and Helen; they’re all on board. And Ingrid said that she would make sure Jane gets there, fully showered. I also set up an appointment with Joseph, he’s my personal stylist. You have an appointment at a salon for three o’clock and then he’ll be taking you to some of the best shops New York has to offer. I thought we could cap the day off with drinks and dinner. Tony’s renting out a restaurant for the night, which means the team can come and everyone can relax.” She calmly folded her hands together. “How does that sound?”

Darcy blinked at her. “I… I think I had a stroke in the elevator and I’m hallucinating this as my final moments.”

Pepper smothered her amusement. “I know we don’t get to see each other often, but I’ve noticed all the hard work you put in. And not just from your weekly emails, which are a lot more… colorful than most employees would send me. That’s not a bad thing, either. I hired you because you speak your mind. You’re smart and capable and you’ve managed to do something not a lot of people could. We work with a lot of wonderful people, but they also have huge personalities, which can make our jobs…difficult. To say the least.”

Clearing her throat, Darcy nodded. “I get that. And I appreciate what you’re saying. But… a spa day, shopping, all of it is a little… much, isn’t it?”

“I don’t think it is.” Pepper shook her head. “Darcy, you work your ass off, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we deserve a break sometimes. So, let me do this for you. Let me show you how much I appreciate all your hard work.”

Chewing her lip, Darcy nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay.” Pepper grinned then. “There’s only one caveat.”

Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Which is…?”

“You give up your phone until the end of the day. No work, no calls, no texts, nothing. If something happens and we absolutely need to reach you, we’ll find you. But today is supposed to be about resting.”

Darcy looked down at her phone, her brow knit. Very slowly, she reached out, and dropped it into Pepper’s hand. “Fine. But take care of her. My whole life is in that phone.”

“I will.”

The doors opened then and Pepper’s assistant stepped inside. “Happy is waiting outside.”

“Great.” Pepper motioned to Darcy. “Happy will stick with you for the day. He’ll take you everywhere you need to go.”

“Uh, okay. Thanks.”

Pepper nodded. “You’re welcome.”

Awkwardly, Darcy turned on her heel to leave, following the assistant out. But a tiny bloom of excitement formed in her stomach. As strange as it felt not to have her phone, it was a little freeing, too. The weight of her job and whatever impending problem it came with was no longer on her plate, at least for today. As she crossed the facility to the front, excitement slowly started to fill her. Stepping outside, she smiled at Happy, his sunglasses on and his hands stacked in front of him.

“Looks like I’m along for the ride, Lewis.” He moved to the back of the car to open her door. “Hope you don’t mind my shadow.”

“If you’re nice, I’ll set you up with a premium pedicure.”

He snorted. “Hot-rod red with gold trim?”

Climbing into the car, she settled back against the buttery leather seat, and winked at him. “Anything for you, Hap.”

Pampered was not a word Darcy considered part of her vocabulary. Pampering herself usually consisted of a cheap facial mask, painting her toenails, and a Netflix binge. None of which had been part of her day-to-day life since signing on with Pepper. There just wasn’t time for that. But after a day of luxury, she was starting to think that maybe pampering herself from time to time was necessary. Maybe she needed a fourth assistant and a regular day off so she could actually enjoy her downtime. It probably wouldn’t involve the best luxury spa in New York, but something a little closer to her budget wouldn’t be terrible.

After a morning of spa treatments, she’d met up with the ladies for lunch, and she… loved it. Most of her interactions with Natasha, Helen, and Maria involved work, but there was none of that. They’d put their phones away too and the meal was spent just talking. Getting to know each other, finding common ground, and occasionally making fun of the boys. Jane was occasionally distracted with writing her thoughts out on napkins here or there, but for the most part, she stayed focused on enjoying her lunch.

After eating, Darcy was ready for a nap, but then Joseph was there, ushering her out of the restaurant and back into the car. She was on time for her hair appointment and, while it took a while, when she walked out of the salon, she felt lighter. Apparently, she had more split ends than she thought, so she had a few inches taken off, added some color, and while it wasn’t a dramatic change, it left her feeling new.

Shopping was unexpectedly fun. With Darcy’s figure, she often struggled to find something that fit properly, but Joseph helped her find outfits that flattered her figure, and whatever she liked that wasn’t perfect, he sent to the tailors to have them done right. She even picked out a new dress and shoes for that evening’s dinner.

In the end, Darcy felt good. Happy helped her out of the car in front of the restaurant and Darcy fiddled with the end of her dress and stroked her fingers through her hair nervously. She felt like she’d just been on one of those cheesy makeover shows and was about to have the reveal in front of her closest friends and family and a live audience. But as Happy led her inside, she calmed down. Her stomach stopped twisting and turning and the familiarity of the faces surrounding the table were a comfort.

Today, she wouldn’t have to steal Tony’s phone or tell Sam to stop posting candid pictures of Barnes glaring at him with the tag lines like ‘freezer burn,’ ‘elsa,’ and ‘ice, ice, Bucky.’ She wouldn’t have to explain whatever slang word Steve had heard Tony purposely say in front of him in the hopes that he would Google it. And she wouldn’t have to convince Natasha to go on any early morning TV shows where she would no doubt terrify the hosts with her cryptic answers to every question. Today, she could just relax and talk to them and be a part of instead of feeling like a nagging parent with too many children that didn’t like the word ‘no.’

Sam noticed her first. “Hey…” He raised his glass and the others followed. “If it isn’t the reason we all got a night off. Nice work, Darce.”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Hardly.” She made her way down the table and took a seat between Helen and Jane. “I’m surprised you all made it.”

“Pep made it mandatory.” Tony was buttering a bun from a nearby bread basket; he waved the knife around absently. “I was in the middle of a stunning piece of engineering brilliance, so if my genius flags later, it’s all on you, Shortstack.”

“It was only mandatory for you,” Pepper said. “Everyone else was happy to come.”

“I never turn down free food.” Clint winked. “It’s good to see you without the extra luggage under your eyes, Kid.”

“The wonders of make-up,” Darcy joked.

A waiter stopped next to her then to get her drink order and when Darcy turned back, she found her phone sitting on the table, next to her napkin. Picking it up, she hesitated. Rather than checking her messages and immediately immersing herself in what she’d missed during the day, Darcy pressed her thumb down on the power button and shut her phone down completely. It could wait for tomorrow.

Placing her phone in her purse, she relaxed and listened to the table as an argument broke out over which appetizers they wanted to get and what end of the table they should go to. It was a pointless discussion, considering they could order multiples, but sometimes she thought Tony and Steve just looked for a way to bicker.

“Well?” Jane shifted in her seat to face her. “How was it?”

Darcy smiled slowly. “Pretty amazing.”

“Good.” Jane bumped her shoulder. “You deserve it.”

Feeling as good as she did, surrounded by the people she worked with and for, by her closest and dearest friends, Darcy agreed. Tomorrow, her day would be just as busy as ever. But, she also knew how much it was appreciated. Plus, she had a feeling that Pepper would ‘okay’ a fourth assistant and, with a new motivation to make sure she was taking care of herself and not just flagging under the weight of her job and responsibilities, she felt better about life and what it was going to look like.

#darcy lewis #laurenlikesstuff #darcy fic #fanfic

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promptistrashqueen · 7 years

Text

A Royal Commission (1)

yeah another new project! Courtesy of @fleetstreetfatality ft. tattooed boys again.

Prompto is Insomnia’s renowned tattoo artist and Noctis is about the get his first ink done!AU (yeah that’s a thing now)

The doors, tall dark glass with the shop’s logo emblazoned on them, were covered in chocobo doodles in white chalk. Prompto smiled brightly at the sight and laughed to himself as he turned his key, letting himself in. Sure enough Maddy was sitting in his chair, chalk dust on her fingers.

“Heyo! I hope you don’t mind I used the hida-key to let myself in early. I promise I stole everything worth anything.”

Prompto rolled his eyes, dropping his bag beside his chair and reaching to fist bump his long time friend.He’s grateful she always leaves him a little sign when she does this, or else he’d have a heart-attack. It does mean he has to wash the door at some point though....

“It’s fine. I wish you’d have called though, I can’t fit you in today, I’m booked up all week after you ran that article...best artist in Insomnia...really Mads.”

She just grinned at him and gestured to the tattoos on her arms and legs. He shook his head with another small laugh and starts to get things organized for the busy day ahead, glancing at the clock above the back wall. The soft grey walls are covered in art, potential ink designs and drawings that Prompto simply felt like. A whole wall is given over to photographs of the city and of people. The wall has a surprising number of photos of Prince Noctis, usually with his guards.

Maddy wondered over, looking the pictures over and tossing a look at Prompto who tries not to respond.

“You know, you are the best. I didn’t just write that article because we’re friends or anything. We took a poll, we did our job as journalists. You know who’s vote tipped it?”

Prompto sighed, looking at her with a raised eyebrow, “Are you even supposed to tell me?”

She laughed and shook her head, turning and heading for the door, she paused, ready to go, “It was one of the Prince’s men. You did a big piece for him, a bird of some sort, and he sent us a personal letter. You were already winning, but that did it….I’ll be back when you’ve got time to work on me! Love ya Prompto, later!”

He tossed her a wave, his hand lowered and he looking at his wall of photos, “Gladiolus…..”

His fingers hurt and he shakes them hard, curling them and uncurling them as he cleans up, just about ready for the end of the day. The last piece he’d worked on had been a massive project that was just being finished, an intricate clock and lace thing.

Prompto is used to the cramps in his fingers and the end of the day routine, but not to the sound of someone knocking on his locked door. He turns to look and has to blink, because on the other side of the now chocobo free glass is the Prince. He gives a little wave and is biting his lip with an apologetic motion of his head. Prompto practically vaults over his chair in his hurry to let in the Prince of Lucis.

“Prince Noctis, sorry sorry, welcome!”

The dark haired male smiles a little and nods, “It’s fine, I know it’s after hours...I’m looking for uh, Prompto?”

Prompto nods, rubbing nervously at his black jeans, “Y-yeah, that’s me. What can I do for you?”

The Prince looks him over more carefully, taking in the bright ink on his arms and the lip ring he plays with nervously.

“I read an article about you...and Gladio practically talked my ears off about how good you are...so I thought I’d come see for myself before I decided.”

Prompto’s eyes grow wide as it slots together, “Decided? You...you want me to work on you? Yeah...I mean, it would be really cool. Uh, have a look around, most the stuff on the walls is little, flash pieces and everything. Charlie’s stuff is on the left, Loqi’s all on the front wall by the door and the rest is me….”

Noctis nods, smiling a little and starts to examine the right wall, standing near the photos on the back wall. Prompto swallows nervously, shifting and trying to finish sterilizing the main space where he’s been working the whole day.

“Do you work on everyone out here?” The Prince’s voice is much closer than Prompto expects and he jumps a little.

“N-no. It’s only if there’s only one person in for the day, so we can keep an eye on the people coming in and out and everything. Or if we’re doing a demonstration sort of thing. I-uh, I usually work in the second room in the back, through that door.”

He points to a dark purple door set unobtrusively in the wall and Noctis nods.

“Good, I’d hate to be stared at while I get work done. Can I make an appointment for tomorrow?”

Prompto nearly chokes, because he expected the Prince to choose one of the other’s, after all Loqi’s work is beautiful, angular and geometric, and Charlie’s is all what he expected someone who looks like Noctis to like, skulls and hyper realistic things. His own is more surreal, more like his photographs, sort of blurred at the edges.

It registers he hasn’t actually answered the question though and as much as he hates saying no, especially to a Prince...he believes in satisfying all his customers.

“I uh...I’m booked for the whole week. I’m sorry. I can get you in next Tuesday though? Or uh, I think Charlie had someone cancel on him?”

The Prince’s face is unreadable as he looks at Prompto and the blue grey eyes seem to see too much. Prompto shifts, worried that he’s made a misstep in turning down the request. Then the Prince smiles, a wide stretch of his lips and laughs.

Prompto smiles, a little confused, in return, feeling blindsided. A hand is stuck out and the other man rubs at his neck.

“Tuesday is fine! I-uh- I’d like you to call me Noct.”

Prompto takes his hand, shaking it, “Al-alright. I can do that. Just, take my card,” He tugs one out of his back pocket and hands it over, still holding Noctis’ hand, “you can email me or call to talk about the design. I’ll draft something up, unless you already have the image?”

Noctis’ smile just brightens, “Nothing at all, just an idea.” He releases Prompto’s hand, finally and Prompto is left feeling like something's been lit in his chest.

“I’ll see you Tuesday Prompto.” Just like that he’s gone again, walking away from the shop in the evening light and Prompto’s standing alone.

“Yeah...Tuesday.”

The first email comes in on Wednesday. It’s late in the evening and Prompto’s running on coffee, because Loqi keeps making him drink it to get work done, and he’s bleary eyed as he clicks to open it. Immediately he feels a little more awake, probably because his heart-rate picks up seeing Noctis’ question.

Prompto,

Before we start talking about the actual design, I wanted to make sure my placement would work. How difficult would it be to integrate or cover a large scar? I...would rather not send a photo of it, so I understand if I need to choose a new place for the tattoo.

Thanks.

Noct

P.S. Ignore the stupid signature thing, I can’t delete it :(

Noctis Lucis Caelum

Prince of Lucis,

Guardian of Insomnia,Protector of the Divine Light

Prompto reads the email twice, his stomach clenching. He hates the thought of Noctis being hurt, especially because the way that the Prince says he doesn’t want to involve a photo of the mark. He knows it’s stupid, because he doesn’t really know this person, but he’s always thought Noctis was a kind and lovely person, or at least good at acting like one. That’s why there are so many photos of him on the wall.

The wall he’s now seen.

Prompto groans, rubbing a hand over his face in embarrassment, because how did he not realize that? Changing it now might only draw the Prince’s attention to it, so he supposes he’ll have to leave it.

The email though...he bites his lip, tongue fiddling with the ring thoughtlessly.

“Okay…” He sighs and types his reply.

Noct,

Hey! So, it’s hard to say for sure without seeing the area you’re talking about or knowing anything about the design...but if it’s a design that I can make work around the scar I will! I want it to be where you wanted it! So let’s talk about the designs first and then we’ll see...I probably can’t cover it T.T sorry, but I can work it in, I hope! :)

Prompto.

P.S Yeah I hate them, so troublesome uuuuggh :))))

Prompto Argentum

Awesome tattoo artist, like the best

Really likes energy drinks and dumb jokes

He sends it, silliness and all and stumbles off to bed.

#Promptis #A Royal Commission #@fleetstreetfatality #part 1 #Prompto #Noctis #aka Neptunes favorite fuckboi king #FFXV #fanfiction #FFXV fanfiction #tattoo's #gaaaay

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thedivinefish · 5 years

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TGIWednesday and a download for having child-like joy!

TGIWednesday News

Ah, it's the day after Christmas and we're in that sweet spot now between Christmas and the New Year... where the holiday frenzy slows down, folks are taking time off of work, and we begin reflecting on the past year and looking ahead toward what changes we want to make, and dreaming about what's ahead. What I can tell you is that sometimes you need that extra help to get yourself aligned and flowing so that your life can unfold in even more miraculous ways! And I've created these clearing Audio MP3s as a tool for you to work on your particular challenges so you can listen to on your own anytime to keep you running forward in life. So, one final reminder that it's the last week of Audio MP3’s BOGO (Buy one, Get one FREE) Every time we run a sale like this, I get the same emails ... on January 1st it will be, “Hey Jimmy, can I still get BOGO on Audio MP3’s?” uh that’s a negative Ghost Rider, you've had 31 days to join the party :) So, just sayin', you better get in on the deal now before it's gone! And I see that some of you are REALLY having fun and have placed multiple orders - Yes, you can do that - but only when putting max of 2 audios in the cart at a time. Here's an interesting question that came in that may help in your decision making:

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This week I joined my my good friend Marla Martenson, Author, Mystical Matchmaker & Energy Healer for another holiday video clearing. This is a quick 5 mins and it will help you release any guilt you feel during the holidays (for over-spending, over-eating etc.) Watch it here Winter Solstice started this past Friday and it was the first day of Winter. My mother Granny Ruth used to say, “I got cabin fever!” So I really want you to get out when you can and do yoga, Tai Chi, Qi Gong, and for me it’s H20 water/Aerobics Class. Even if you can walk around the block, shovel snow or go to YouTube and watch and participate in any form of movement - you’re going to be ahead of the game! And speaking of Granny Ruth, many of you are so sweet to ask about her and know that TODAY is her 90th Birthday and here she is yesterday enjoying her Milano cookies on Christmas. We love you, and appreciate you and know that you can reach me 7 days a week 365 days a year! [email protected] I remain the Way-Shower for you! Love to all on this, the last TGIW of 2018!!

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divinefishingtips · 5 years

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TGIWednesday and a download for having child-like joy!

TGIWednesday News

A) I would get a second opinion and get them removed. But that’s just me. It is possible that the audio could shrink them...it took years to produce and borders on magic. - Jimmy

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of ALL clearing MP3s available. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s) & click on the link to read more.

Increasing Intuition Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

Last Days for BOGO MP3s! (save $57)

TGIWednesday Download

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

Live Shows and Replays

Browse the interview archives here.

Live In-Person Appearances

LIVE AT KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

SWANN HOLISTIC HEALTH CENTER TAMPA

39 A DAVIS BLVD Tampa, FL http://www.ctholisticsolutions.com

From the Fish Box

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

Choose 7 days @$33 Choose 14 days @$66 Choose 30 days @$99

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advancedthetapractitioner · 5 years

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TGIWednesday and a download for having child-like joy!

TGIWednesday News

A) I would get a second opinion and get them removed. But that’s just me. It is possible that the audio could shrink them...it took years to produce and borders on magic. - Jimmy

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of ALL clearing MP3s available. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s) & click on the link to read more.

Increasing Intuition Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

Last Days for BOGO MP3s! (save $57)

TGIWednesday Download

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

Live Shows and Replays

Browse the interview archives here.

Live In-Person Appearances

LIVE AT KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

SWANN HOLISTIC HEALTH CENTER TAMPA

39 A DAVIS BLVD Tampa, FL http://www.ctholisticsolutions.com

From the Fish Box

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

Choose 7 days @$33 Choose 14 days @$66 Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

My Liquid Fish® Mastery Certification

Level I is open for ANYONE TO JOIN at anytime!

LEARN MORE HERE

TGIFunny

Forward

Stay connected!

Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

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cosmosogler · 7 years

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hello. yesterday sucked.

i don’t even remember yesterday that well. i ended up hanging out with keegan and harrison for like an hour and a half, between 5:30 and 7, right before we proctored... we were swapping goofy youtube videos. at the end of my video my youtube recommendations popped up and i was like “NOOOOOOOOOOO” and tried to cover up my screen while having a panic attack, because i’m really cool.

i listen to video game soundtracks. i do not really want them knowing which video games i like. even though portal 2 is objectively the best game ever i just feel like... it’s hard to share fan made content with other people.

like when i mentioned i read fan fiction everyone got all weird about it like i was reading hardcore porn or something. i don’t like that feeling. that like... misunderstanding of what my interest is. then i end up rambling for two hours to explain my love for this piece of media and i bore the other person and then we’re back at square one.

but if i join, like, a fandom, i’ll be expected to only talk about that one thing. but i like lots of things!!! i dunno. let me listen to the blue sky “podcast” in peace.

i’ve never talked about that book with ANYONE, except to mention that it’s really good. and it is a novel. it takes that long to read.

anyway proctoring was boring so i spent some time counting all the left-handed students in the lecture hall, and then i played pokemon go, and then i wandered around staring intimidatingly at people. i am not intimidating at all, i wear a bow in my hair. but they looked at me like i was either gonna rip their heads off, or stark naked, and i’m not sure which.

also the stapler was loud as a gunshot and i flinched every time i had to staple someone’s exam together, which was 115 times.

i talked to the professor i was teamed up with though and we just talked about, like, moving to a new place and getting established i guess? i don’t know about you guys but i unironically like talking about the weather. leave me alone.

i actually can’t tell if i want to be alone or not. i feel sick like i want to be alone. but i also desperately want to talk about this stuff i like. i talked to keegan about competitive pokemon for 20 minutes and let him see my collection. well, “see,” because he is basically blind and didn’t even realize my ds had a top screen. he asked how many of my 270 pokemon are hacked and i said like 8. and that’s... true. in the ballpark of ten, i think.

he stopped playing after diamond and pearl so i had to explain hidden abilities and triple battles. i miss triple battles.

oh right, yesterday i had group therapy. i got some advice. i think i will try to implement it soon. basically the idea is to carry a notebook or a phone memo with you and to periodically question yourself and write down everything you are feeling. it might help me narrow down my emotions to more than “angry” or “confused.” and she said it helps you get to know yourself better too.

hey today i woke up on time again. i think snoopy had been laying on my feet because they were extremely warm when i woke up. i didn’t get enough sleep at all. i finished getting ready early so of course that means i got distracted and left for class a little late.

but i biked turbo fast i guess because i got to class right on time and started teaching right away. i think it went ok. i was completely exhausted about 3/4 of the way through my second lab though so the last half hour was a real struggle to help everyone finish. i don’t know why my last section has so much trouble finishing on time. it cuts into my lunch break before my meetings with danielle at the drc. or whatever other appointment i have to attend to that day. last week i didn’t even get a lunch break, i had to eat at the seminar thing, i mentioned.

but it’s my middle section, which i feel i teach the best, that’s been getting consistently the lowest grades out of my sections. so i dunno. i use the same rubric for all three.

so i forced down some lunch and graded for 45 minutes (skipped coffee cookie time on accident, i didn’t really feel like dealing with sam today anyway, maybe next week). and then i went to the drc. we arranged for my course to get dropped and i contacted financial aid about the change to my minimum full time credit hours. i haven’t heard back from them yet, but the minute i do i’m going to set up an appointment with my graduate advisor to get that settled. in the meantime danielle told me not to waste my time going to class and to worry about the long term stuff.

maybe since everyone is here all year round i can cajole one of the professors into leading an “independent study” where i can try to keep up with my e&m credit.

we finished that up in about 25 minutes so danielle spent a while asking about my emotions. i think they were good questions because for once i had answers i could put into words, sort of. she pointed out that i laugh when i mention something painful to me. i said i get that a lot. it’s... easier than acknowledging that it hurts. ESPECIALLY in front of other people. crying is awkward and makes people uncomfortable.

we went a little bit into, like, the reasoning behind my trust issues and how it affects me now. it really was painful giving a list of the people that have majorly wronged me. and now how i don’t tell people when i’m sad or angry with them because that might make them angry and why should i be angry if i don’t want to be around angry people. and i know that when people are angry with you it’s scary and i don’t want to spook the people i care about. and like, i don’t like people being angry around me, because even if they’re not angry at me specifically they will take it out on me. it’s not safe.

“wronged” as in, like, how jim ghosted on me. or the year craig spent telling me i was “too much” or taking my words out of context and making me look like a real monster to my friends.

she asked why i haven’t told sam directly to cut out the “cute” thing yet since it’s really rustling my jimmies. she said it was really disrespectful and i dunno it felt nice to hear someone else agreeing with me. well, it’s more like, she asked why i haven’t told sam how her words make me feel. i said it’s because it ain’t her business. danielle said that was fair enough.

telling people how their words make you feel is kind of, making yourself vulnerable to a person who literally just hurt you. hey, glad you’ve found my buttons! let me just make myself more vulnerable there for you. is that an easier target now? glad to help. let me know if there’s anything else i can do to make it easier for you to hurt my feelings.

i also mentioned the guy in the discord several weeks ago who went off on me for complaining about past romantic partners, because how *dare* i feel sad for being assaulted, because *he* can’t even get one date! i should be GRATEFUL for the attention!

involving a lot more curse words and insults to my mental faculties and character, of course.

man, i kinda hate having to add that tw tag to my posts because i mentioned something that happened to me. it does affect me though. and it’s better to warn people what they’re getting into. even if i just mention it once.

i felt a little bummed, but also, a little more on both feet mentally/emotionally after i left. i filled out my medical drop form and sent it to danielle to review. then i dicked around on the internet for like an hour while harrison came and sat in the office and dicked around on his phone. we didn’t really talk but we did throw candy at each other for a few minutes.

it’s so hard to show people the stuff i love. i mention it sometimes and if they don’t, like, immediately show interest i drop it forever. oz has been kind about the stuff i recommend. i’m trying to figure out which movie i want to watch with him over my thanksgiving break. i know it’s just an hour and a half or two hours, but it still feels like a huge energy investment.

one time i linked him a music video and he said it was “beautiful” and i was like, “I KNOW RIGHT???”

i’ve remembered that moment for a long time. that was many years ago.

i graded until after 8 and finished one more section. two more to go before i am officially in the clear. then i will only be 2 weeks behind! for those 3 sections each!!! i also uploaded the grades to keep my supervisor posted on my progress a little better, and adjusted some formatting preferences on the excel file to make it easier for me to find stuff right away.

i think my grade averages are maybe the lowest out of my friend group. i’m so concerned about doing right by my students and then i end up being kind of a hardass when it comes to actually taking off points haha... it’ll get curved back up at the end so i’m not too worried. i just feel bad that my students have to look at their 12/20 because i know how demoralizing that is. i think i will send out an email later and offer some resources if i can find any.

the problem is that i had 4 or 5 curve breakers so i couldn’t just scale up everyone’s scores at the end.

anyway once i got home i made a microwave meal because it was like 8:50 and i just wanted food. i did all my dishes and hid some cookies for snoopy and cleaned her litter genie thing since it, uh, malfunctioned the other day and i just didn’t have time to fix it until tonight. and i swept the bathroom afterward so that looks better and doesn’t smell like cat pee.

ok it is six minutes after my “stop writing” time. i would like to get enough sleep tonight for once. i just have a lot on my mind and not much desire to deal with my dreams.

i saw my friends again. i was just watchin em, i couldn’t really interact with the dream at all. they were trying to figure out some deja vu feelings. i couldn’t say anything to them that might help clear it up though. unable to get the message across.

i think keegan asked what kinds of dreams i have that i don’t like sleeping very much. oh i mentioned i don’t like naps because i get horrible nightmares. he asked how i ever sleep then and i said i guess eight hours is long enough for the dreams to calm down. THEN he asked what kinds of dreams i have. i said i dream about my eyes rotting out, or the skin coming off my hands, or blood and gunk just coming out of my mouth in a constant stream. he and harrison said please stop.

i am not sure how to bring up dream friends with them. i mentioned it to suzanne one time on the way to spaghetti day when we were swapping dream concepts. and i am not sure if they are even interesting enough to bring up. i’m not sure what to make of them at all. i guess it makes being awake feel less real. because i’ve met all these people in my dreams and i don’t always remember what i say to them but they feel real to me.

you know, i did bring them up a little bit. i mentioned that i meet a lot of people in my dreams and that most of them are dead now. that prompted a joke about how we are all dead to keegan until he sees us again in the morning. it was funny and it made me feel a little better, but with most of them like, i watched them die. it’s not a matter of “haven’t been in touch.”

i just don’t know how to describe how i feel about the dream guys. it feels dumb to care about something like that when they’re not even real, they’re people i made up in my head. like it’s almost egotistical to pay attention to them or be concerned for their safety. i guess it depends on how you interpret dreams. collective consciousness? random nonsense? processing our day by making random associations? who knows. maybe a little of all of them.

maybe it’s easier for my brain to handle being concerned about people i made up and put into danger myself than it is for my brain to be concerned about me and the problems i make in my own head.

i was talking to keegan and jennica and harrison at our meeting before the proctoring started. we were talking about how we have all adopted keegan’s “that’s no good” whenever we see something we don’t like. harrison joked that that’s how he would introduce keegan to a stranger. then he said he would introduce me to a stranger by saying something like “this is sammie. she’s depressed.”

i guess i felt kinda bad. i said “wow, good to know that depression is my defining character trait. it’s the one thing about me everyone notices!”

maybe the others felt bad too because i don’t think we talked about that much more. it’s hard to remember.

i still say things nic used to say in high school when we dated. like “wow! WOW! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW” is a good one. i think “smooth like sandpaper” is a phrase he picked up from me but we both said it a lot.

people stay with me. even when i don’t want them to. i still make jokes that shade toward stuff craig used to say. i still make jokes that jim really liked. when i caught myself using that old stupid punch line i had to stop and feel kinda sick for a few minutes actually.

i wonder if that’s all that people pick up from me? “this is sammie. she has depression.” i say things that i think are hilarious all the time but i don’t know if other people pick it up. i have like fifteen different words for “angry.” maybe my speech pattern is just odd enough that people don’t really copy me.

i’ve never really talked like a normal person. most of my vocabulary comes from reading. books, internet message boards, video games, international students in high school. i still mispronounce words and i have so much trouble with names that i, like, try to avoid referring to people by name at this point.

danielle said i should try to make myself more vulnerable to my friends. so maybe they can understand me better. and maybe i will understand them better.

but i tried that already. it didn’t work. i’m not stupid. i’m not gonna try something a million times if i know it’s not gonna work.

just kidding, i’m still studying physics. of course i’m gonna beat my head against a wall until either the wall or my head breaks!!!

danielle said she admired how strong i am for continuing to get up and work hard every day. she asked how i was feeling. i said “not very strong.”

it doesn’t feel like strength. it just feels like. boredom. maybe. i don’t know what else to do and i get restless. may as well do stuff.

#tw assault

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