More angst because I'm mentally ill and probably going to fail school. Life's great 😀👍
Edit: ok so I pretty much started and I decided on hurt/comfort.
Ok enjoy, muah ❤
Dancing the Sad Away
The quarry is the quiet place to think. The one he met Eddie at, when he was at his lowest. The one where he wanted to do nothing but let Eddie hold him. He can't do that now. Never be able to. Because Eddie hasn't talked to him in weeks and he doesn't know why. Except he does.
Because he kissed Eddie.
That's why.
Because Eddie is straight and doesn't like him like that.
He made a move he shouldn't have and now he lost his best friend.
Steve feels like crying. So he does. Fucking bawls his eyes out. He misses Eddie so so much. But he's not here and it's Steve's fault. It's his fault for not talking and just doing. Making a choice he shouldn't have because Eddie is straight. And he hates himself for it.
In order for Steve to feel better he decides to get out of his car but not before turning on and almost blasting the radio. Some random top 40 pop song plays and he hops out. Walks around in his blue and white striped pajama pants and sits on the roof of his car. He brings his knees to his chest and leans back.
'I wish Eddie was here' his brain whispers to him. Haunting him of the stupid mistake he made. Of the mistake of kissing a straight guy. Steve already hates himself for it and feels so guilty about it. He doesn't need his stupid brain torturing him about the guy.
Gods he's a loser.
Lost in his thoughts Steve doesn't hear a car pull up a few feet away from him. He doesn't even realize anyone's there until he hears a voice.
"Hey." It's Eddie. At first he thinks his mind is playing tricks on him again but then he sees him leaning against the side of his car out of his peripheral vision. He almost violently turns his head to look at him. Steve is completely shocked and a little nervous. He's speechless really. So when he doesn't reply Eddie smiles awkwardly and takes a step back while looking down at his shoes. He wants to tell Eddie to stop. Wants to tell him it's so ok for him to be so close to him. But he can't.
"I know you haven't seen me in ages and I'm sorry. I just- God Stevie." Eddie turns his head to the side while his hand shakily rubs his face. "I needed time to think, to- to understand what I felt."
There's nothing in Steve's brain but the fact that he might get rejected and Eddie still calms him Stevie. It makes him want to cry even more. And it's all his fault.
"I just-. I think I-," Steve can't stand what he's about to say so he decides to just say what he wants to first.
"I'm sorry." He doesn't look at Eddie when he says it. Can't stand looking at him when he knows what's happening and what he's going to say to him.
"What?" And Eddie, sweet sweet Eddie has the need to to act confused.
"I'm sorry. You know for... kissing.. you." Steve explains, feeling even more ashamed when he whispers kissing like some stupid middle school boy. He feels utterly guilty and stupid for even trying to kiss Eddie. Like he didn't know what Eddie would think. Like he's some stupid hopless romantic in a love story where everything works out. But this isn't a book, this is reality. And he needs to wake up.
"Stevie..." He starts, "Don't apologize." His voice is softer than it should be when rejecting someone that it makes Steve finally look at him.
When he turns his head he almost immediately sobs at the sight of him. His eyes are red, not in the way they usually are when he smokes. There's bags under them too. His hair looks extra messy, and not the good kind. And there's this sad expression on his face that makes Steve want to wrap him in a blanket and cuddle him until they fall asleep.
"Why not?" Steve's voice is higher than it should be and it cracks like a 13 year-old boy's the day before puberty starts. And Eddie steps closer to him. He looks at Steve with such gentleness that a tear slips from his eye. And Eddie, being the fucking amazing person that he is, wipes it. His hand doesn't move from his cheek though.
"Because I needed to except that... I wanted you." Now Eddie is tearing up and it stings Steve heart in a way nothing ever did. He closes his eyes, feeling himself not wanting to believe this dream and just wake up. He can't believe this is happening to him. He's wanted this forever and he wants to know what good he did to get this. To get him. "I didn't think I could feel like this. I just thought I was never really interested in anyone but then I realized I've just never really felt like this for girls. That in of itself freaked me the fuck out."
When Eddie starts talking and his hand begins to slip from Steve's face he feels the need to listen. To open his eyes and look at him because he needed that back then so he's needs to give Eddie this now.
"I- I never thought I was gay! I just kind of assumed that guys just thought about guys a certain way. I didn't know that meant I wasn't into girls." Eddie is looking down at his feet again, a sign of how vulnerable he's being right now, and Steve wants to hug him. He wants to tell him that it's ok. That he gets it because he's been through the same thing. "And Steve," and now he's looking at him again with that expression. The one he could never figure out what it was before; maybe now he can.
"Oh, Stevie..." Eddie walks to stand in front of Steve. He grabs his face and smiles at him so soft he practically melts. "I am so sorry. For ever letting you think I never wanted you back. I just- didn't know that's what it was. Why I felt like this." He's so sincere that Steve feels a tsunami of relief was over him. He brings his hands to sit on top of Eddie's and he squeezes them oh so gently, just like he always wanted to.
"It's okay." He tells him. He wants- no he needs Eddie to understand what he really truly feels about him. "I just- thought that you were straight and that I ruined everything-"
"No!"Eddie interrupts him this time. "No Stevie you could never. I almost ruined everything." He let's go of Steve's face abruptly and takes a step or two back. Eddie's still close he's just nervous, judging by the way he looks down at his feet again. "That is if you still want me." He looks at Steve with those gorgeous Bambi-like eyes and, how could Steve say no?
How could he say no to this vulnerable, soft and perfect man? The answer is he doesn't. Steve just smiles at him, big, and laughs under his breath. It's just a minute of him laughing quietly at his question. He shakes his head and smiles the widest smile he's ever smiled, then looks up at Eddie. Beautiful, gorgeous Eddie. "Of course not. I've always wanted you. Always." And when he says that a look of relief spills from Steve to Eddie, the tidal wave crashing into the ocean and letting Eddie step back over the line. The line of friendship and more.
When his lips make it over its better than the first time. Steve feels everything Eddie does through the connection of just their lips. It's a bond of emotions he's always wanted to feel but was never able to. His hands grab at the first thing they can get their grip on. The collar of Eddie's shirt. The black long-sleeved shirt he usually wears to sleep because of their broken heater in the trailer. It's the shirt Steve gave him three Christmases ago when they found out th air conditioning and heater broke. He's worn it to bed ever since and it just makes everything feel that much more intimate.
When they pull away, it's slowly as if they can't enough of the taste of more than just friends. Steve opens his eyes to see pretty pink cheeks and even prettier eyes. Eddie's eyes are so filled with love that his pupil reflecting it is so big you can barley see the beautiful chocolate brown of them. But Steve does. Because he always sees them. Sees Eddie.
"I love you. Did you know that?" Steve almost doesn't even register Eddie's voice until his brain is less mush. When he can actually think and process things he's completely taken aback by Eddie's words.
"What?" He just can't believe someone as good and perfect as Eddie could feel that about him.
"I love you." Eddie is laughing just the slightest under his breath but Steve catches it anyway. They're so in tune with each other that the other always notices everything. And this time Steve is almost offended by Eddie's amusement of how slow Steve's brain is. But then he looks at him, really looks at him. And all that he can see are the crows of his eyes and the single dimple on the left side of his face.
Steve scoffs and rolls his eyes at Eddie's laughter. He pushes his shoulder and pretends to be annoyed at Eddie laughing at him but he knows his small smile betrays him. This makes Eddie laugh even more, this time a little louder and much more genuine. It's so contagious that steve can't help but join in, even the smallest scoff of a laugh.
"You're lucky I love you too." He finally responds after Eddie's huge laughter fit. Steve is looking at Eddie with such a soft but amused smile when he says it that it makes Eddie's expression soften a little more.
"I am lucky aren't I?" And God he sounds so sure and in love that Steve's heart just lurches at him, making his arms go with it. They grab and grip onto Eddie like a koala and he just laughs and hugs back. A slow romantic love song interrupts them.
This is when they both realize the radio is still playing. Eddie, being so overly charming like he always is, smiles at him like he's got a plan. Steve watches as he walks over and reaches into the car. The radio is turned on more so they can both hear it more clearly. When Eddie goes to stand in front of Steve again, he bows. Actually bows in front of him and extends his hand. "Care to dance my good sir?"
Steve snorts and being the hopless romantic they both know he is accepts his offer and rests his hand on top of Eddie's. He pulls Steve in as close as he can get him. Their fingers are interlocked and Eddie's hand is on his waist. They start to sway slowly to the beat, hearing Frank Sinatra but feeling everything they've always wanted to say in just the small movements of their bodies.
Wddie turns him and he ends up glwith his back against Eddie's chest as he grips onto Steve's waist with one hand. The other hand is tightly gripped by him and Steve feels like he's living his dream. He closes his eyes and succumbs to the music, leaning his head back onto Eddie's shoulder. Eddie moves his head to breath in Steve, nose pressed against his shoulder.
And all Steve can think is that maybe he never made a mistake.
Maybe he just needed patience.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thank you so much for reading 🙏❤❤
Song that inspired the idea:
Song that they danced to:
Love you guys ❤❤
37 notes
·
View notes
endless love!
[ID Two drawing collage pages of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. In the first collage, top corner, Wolfwood looks upwards disgruntled with a flushed expression, lying against a pillow, as his hair is being pet by Vash's hand. Next shows Vash and Wolfwood from behind, Wolfwood with his top bare and hickies covers around his nape area. Vash lifts hair away from his nape and asks, "More?" Wolfwood nervously says, "No." Next is a side profile of Vash, his arms around Wolfwood from behind while Wolfwood rests his hands against Vash's arms. Next to this are two smaller drawings; Vash turns to Wolfwood and says repetitively, "Wolfwood, Wolfwood..." Wolfwood, not looking at him, says "What?" He finally turns his head and looks shocked as he exclaims, "So close!" Vash says plainly, "You just noticed?" Below these is a drawing of Vash and Wolfwood sitting together as Vash kisses and hugs him from behind with his right arm around Wolfwood's neck and his left hand around his side. He also has his right leg propped against Wolfwood's knee. Bottom of the page has a comic. Wolfwood looks annoyed, speaking to himself, "Where is that idiot?! Need to get out of town before--" A chat bubble exclaims, "Wolfwood!" The next panel shows Vash running from the townspeople, small text saying "Get him! Vash the stampede!". Wolfwood, mad and about to pull the Punisher off his shoulder, says, "Argh, you fucking dumbass!" Vash exclaims, "Ah, don't!" before pulling Wolfwood into a quick kiss. He then tugs on Wolfwood's collar and says, "There's no need to shoot, just run!" Wolfwood stammers, "R-right..." with a flushed, dumbstruck expression.
Second collage; Top left, Wolfwood spoons Vash in bed, his arms around his chest and the other beneath Vash's head. Vash has his hand on top of Wolfwood's as he sleeps while Wolfwood lies awake. Behind this drawing is faint sketches of Vash's face. In a small panel, Wolfwood hides in Vash's neck as he mumbles to himself "Stop. Stop thinking embarrassing things, Wolfwood..." Beneath this drawing is another of them in bed, Vash now turned to Wolfwood and a hand on his cheek as he kisses him good morning. In a simpler style, Vash wraps an arm tightly around wolfwood with the text "snork mimimi" next to him while Wolfwood says, "We need to get up. Spikey! HEY!" In this corner, there are faint sketches of Vash and Wolfwood; one of them looking at each other; Vash kissing Wolfwood's forehead; Wolfwood saying, "Hand" with an outstretch hand and Vash says "ok" behind a drawing of them holding hands, both turned away from each other shyly. Next is a 4 panel comic. First shows Wolfwood's face getting squished by Vash's hands with the text "squish" around his face. Next, his cheeks are stretched with the text "Chee--" Wolfwood then hits Vash's face with his palm, exclaimining "That hurts!" The last shows Vash on Wolfwood's lap, smiling to himself as he continues to have Wolfwood's face in his hands. Next to this is another comic; A close up of their hands, Vash holding Wolfwood's with both of his. He then kisses the palm of Wolfwood's palm and says, "They're soft!" Wolfwood looks at him with flushed cheeks, "There's no way that's true..." END ID]
4K notes
·
View notes