there are only really two that i think count since most of my characters, like blackbox and A. and english and the like are all just canon characters that i’ve twisted until they’re unrecohnizable. their names are sol “phosphor” and matthew gallows. their backstory is very, very long and i WILL rant about it for paragraphs at a time so it’s all goin under a cut thanks.
also please be careful because of, uh… child abuse, acts of violence, murder of parents, cannibalism, attempted fratricide, and just generally monstrous stuff that i really should not have been telling as a bedtime story. please don’t read this if it sounds too violent. i’m a little scared of the things i came up with too.
it’s so scary having an illness/disorder/symptom/issue which is under researched so, even if i wanted a way out, i’d have such minimal support and help and advice available, i probably wouldn’t be able to “recover” or stop being dependent on my daydreams. like, what if throughout my entire lifetime, nobody ever figures a treatment out for maladaptive daydreaming? and i’m just stuck like this forever? i don’t even know if i would want to recover, but it’s scary not knowing whether it’s even an option or whether i’m literally stuck like this for my entire life.
Mentions of abuse and mistreatment
Something that I like about Lapis, even though it’s not exactly great in the eyes of most others;
Remember on the ship where Jasper begged Lapis to fuse with her again because she loved feeling strong?
And Lapis refused? Do you remember what she said while she was refusing?
She was admitting that she abused Japser.
BEFORE YOU GET MAD:
Yes, Jasper was bad to Lapis. But Lapis was bad back.
She took things out on Jasper and she liked it. She liked abusing Jasper.
And she ADMITS that. And she points out that it wasn’t healthy for either of them and it’s a huge reason she doesn’t want to fuse with Jasper again.
Now, why do I like that Lapis said all of this?
I like it because she admits that she did it. She knows what she did was wrong and she knows that she needs to keep an eye on her future relationships in order to prevent herself from mistreating any future partners.
She doesn’t try to deny that she was abusive and she doesn’t try to pin all the blame on Jasper.
She knows that her own actions aren’t Japser’s fault, and she’s NOT going to say it is.
She KNOWS what she did, she KNOWS that she was in control of her actions, and she KNOWS that she has to work on herself to prevent mistreating any future partners!
I don’t like that she did it in the first place, I was just so happy to see a character go ‘this is my fault. I was bad to them, I was in control of it and I know that this person didn’t make me do it.’
It’s just…amazing to me. I’m so used to seeing the abuser blaming the victim and never accepting the fact that they where in complete control of themselves the whole time. Seeing them not feel bad for their actions or regret anything.
So seeing the thing just…flipped? Switched? It was just an amazingly pleasant surprise to me.
narcissists be like:
let us congregate at barbecues to laugh at our children’s mistakes & pains & feel self-righteous
yea let us come together to bolster each other’s fantasy that we never ever did anything wrong as parents or hurt & traumatised our children ever or contributed to their difficulties as adults in any way at all
world without end, amen.
CHARACTER TRUTHS !
bold = always / often | italic = sometimes
( repost ! do not reblog ! )
1. smoking: the action or habit of inhaling and exhaling the smoke of tobacco or a drug.
2. binge drinking: the consumption of an excessive amount of alcohol in a short period of time.
3. drug abuse: the habitual taking of illegal drugs.
4. nail biting: a common body language sign of anxiety/tension.
5. lip biting: a common body language sign of anxiety/tension.
6. night owl: a person who is habitually active or wakeful at night.
7. early bird: a person who rises, arrives, or acts before the usual or expected time.
8. negative attitudes: a philosophy of approaching life with criticism & pessimism.
9. positive attitudes: a philosophy of approaching life with optimism & confidence.
10. swearing: the use of offensive language.
11. superstitious: an irrational belief that an object, action, or circumstance not logically related to a course of events influences its outcome.
12. inspecting fingernails: a common body language sign of boredom.
13. scratching your neck: a common body language sign of uncertainty.
14. foot and finger tapping: a common body language sign of stress/impatience.
15. nose touch: a subtle body language sign of deceit.
16. flipping hair: a common body language sign of craving attention.
17. twirling hair: a common body language sign of flirtation
18. cracking knuckles: a common body language sign of readiness.
19. hands behind back: a common body language sign of confidence.
20. finger pointing: a common body language sign of authority.
21. hands on hips: a common body language sign of readiness.
22. hands in pockets: a common body language sign of mistrust/reluctance.
23. frequent touch: a common body language sign of warmth/familiarity.
24. throat - clearing: a common body language sign of rejection/doubt.
25. jaw - clenching: a common body language sign of hostility.
26. eye - rolling: a common body language sign of irritation.
27. head - tilt: a common body language sign of interest.
28. whistling: to emit high - pitched sound by forcing breakthrough a small hole between one’s lips or teeth; usually to a tune.
29. humming: make a low, steady continuous sound like that of a bee; usually to a tune.
30. perfectionism: refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.
31. photographic memory: the ability to remember information or visual images in great detail.
32. paranoia: a mental condition characterised by delusions of persecution, unwarranted jealousy, or exaggerated self - importance, typically worked into an organised system.
33. exaggeration: a statement that represents something as better or worse than it really is.
34. intuitive: using or based on what one feels to be true even without conscious reasoning; instinctive.
35. quick - witted: showing or characterized by an ability to think or respond quickly & effectively.
36. interrupting: breaking the continuity of a conversation with one’s own statements.
37. doodling: to scribble or make rough drawings, absentmindedly.
38. irritable: having or showing a tendency to be easily annoyed.
39. gambling: to play games of chance for money; bet.
40. travel - sick: suffering from nausea caused by the motion of a moving vehicle, boat, or aircraft.
41. sensitive: having or displaying a quick & delicate appreciation of others’ feelings.
42. melancholy: a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.
43. chewing gum: the exercise of chewing flavoured gum which is not intended for swallowing.
44. fidgeting: to make small movements, especially of the hands & feet, through nervousness or impatience.
45. skeptical: not easily convinced; having doubts or reservations.
46. neat - freak: compulsively obsessed with cleanliness.
47. gossiping: divulging personal information about others.
48. prim: feeling or showing disapproval of anything regarded as improper; stiffly correct.
49. abbreviating: giving others nicknames/shortening names/giving pet names.
50. having a catchphrase: having a sentence or phrase typically associated with a specific person.
stolen from @subject-wyk!! :3
tagging: if u want 2 do it go 4 it friends!!!
“…I gave in. I have a Brazilian Black rescue on th’ way. She’s a few months old, but during those months, her previous owner didn’t care for her properly, then just surrendered her. Not sure how you can neglect a tarantula considerin’ how easy they are t’ care for, but…whateva’.
My sweet baby now, bitch.”
Also why is it socially acceptable to hurt a cat but not a dog? Makes me sad
hc // so, if any citizen in his city even dares to abuse or mistreat a child …
He will fucking murder them. Painfully. Those kind of people are not tolerated in his city, and he doesn’t even give them a chance to fucking breathe.
That being said, Aku may be a dick and kill everything in sight, but he doesn’t harm children.
I don’t want to feel this way anymore.
I don’t want to feel this way.
I don’t want to feel this.
I don’t want to feel.
I don’t want to.