#because i don't think there's any convincing for me. i am pretty stubborn after all. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

melancholia-ennui · 1 month

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hey, I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. you did something silly that actually really helped my severe anxiety and insecurities and gave me new perspective; it may have seriously changed my outlook and/or possibly future life.

Warning, this is detailed and a bit heavy at times. Feel free not to read - if you decide not to, just know that you did something I'm deeply grateful for.

Here goes.

a while ago you made this post (https://www.tumblr.com/melancholia-ennui/744585335612293120/so-the-thing-that-i-find-fascinating-about-the?source=share) weighing in on the walrus/fairy poll debate, talking about how many of the people on team fairy who got hung up on "but a fairy is impossible" were possibly demonstrating a somewhat stubborn mentality and getting too wrapped up in the impossibility of a fairy etc to actually consider the poll's actual question.

you didn't say it directly (at least I don't think so - if you actually did and I missed it then I am very sorry, feel free to piss on the poor me etc etc), but I interpreted this as a dig at the type of people who refuse to change a belief when confronted with increasing amounts of evidence that contrast that belief in favor of continuing to consider something 'impossible'.

I'm a bookworm and a lover of fantasy, sci-fi, everything that lets me escape, and in childhood I was definitely the type (and still am to some extent) to constantly wish for some fantasy world to come true to set some grand adventure in motion. I would have *loved* a fairy showing up at my door.

As stated previously, I have pretty severe anxiety, specifically social anxiety. My insecurities are heavily related to not appearing stupid or foolish in any way. When I grew up, I began to always accompany the wish for some fantasy aspect to appear in my life with the thought "but even if it ever were to happen, you cannot let yourself believe in it, because, since it's impossible, it is definitely a prank or trick set up by someone, and if you get seen believing in whatever magic shows up in your life, people will laugh at you for being stupid enough to fall for it and you will have deserved it too. You can avoid this fate by, in the unlikely event that something like this ever happens, adamantly refusing to believe in magic so that you don't look stupid, gullible, and childish to others."

(I actually did not realize until I got to this part of writing this out that this mentality was most likely not helped by an incident in which my family members gifted 8-year-old me, who was at the time very obsessed with Harry Potter*, a Hogwarts letter, watched me freak out over it and jubilantly think I was going and waited two whole days to tell me it wasn't real.)

*yes I grew up since then and realized JKR sucks but I was 8 then and didn't know any of this

Anyways, your post was a bit of a mirror to me. It made me realize that, really, this isn't a way to live. Considering current observations, I do not believe in magic, but if solid evidence were to present itself to the contrary... maybe I shouldn't stick my head in the sand out of fear that someone is lying to me. That's how conspiracy theorists generally operate, after all. And while applying this to magic is a bit silly, it goes for all facets of life - being afraid that people will find me stupid for changing longstanding previously held beliefs in the face of convincing evidence otherwise will do nothing but bring me stubbornness, unhappiness, and a reputation for being closed-minded.

I really can't express how much your silly walrus/fairy discourse post opened my eyes and made me realize I shouldn't let social anxiety color my logic like this. I mean it in every way possible when I say thank you.

Thank you.

so this ask has been sitting in my ask box for a while now because every time I go to reply I get stuck so this time I'm just going to try and write something and if you're reading this it means I decided that 'something' was good enough.

firstly, thank you for reaching out - I'm glad whenever anything I do can be helpful to someone else, so it's always nice to hear.

I'm also sorry to hear how shitty your family has treated you - making a joke out of children's fantasies is just cruel, and I'm sorry it happened to you.

as for the post, it wasn't meant as a jab against a particular sort of person per se, just a lightly humorous observation on what I considered an interesting pattern of epistemic behaviour. with my background in philosophy and psychology I'm always interested in ways that people think and how those can fall apart or get in the way.

I would say that in most cases, epistemic dogmatism - holding any belief with so much certainty that no evidence of any degree could ever change your mind - is best avoided. we, individually and as a species, know an awful lot less than we think we do, and maintaining an attitude of humility towards knowledge - being open to changing our beliefs in accordance with the evidence - is the best way to navigate a complex world. this is something humans are actually really bad at - we're incredibly defensive of our constructed world views and will, on average, tend to undervalue evidence that challenges what we already believe and overvalue evidence that supports it. this has it's epistemic uses in moderation (as any Bayesian could tell you), but it can be very harmful when left to run rampant.

that said, I also don't think that 'what other people think of you' is the best yardstick for developing a robust method for gaining knowledge - whether that's avoiding challenging evidence because you don't want to be taken for a fool, or changing your beliefs too readily because you don't want to be seen as stubborn.

I also struggle and have struggled with social anxiety, but the unfortunate truth that I've come to realise is you will look like an idiot. a lot, actually, if you're anything like me. and you might be able to avoid looking like an idiot sometimes by giving up on or hiding away the things that bring you joy, or by curling in on yourself into a cynical little ball, but from my experience? you just end up looking like an idiot anyway for some other reason, only now you look like an idiot and are also miserable. so it's all rather pointless really, and you'll get through it all with a lot fewer bumps if you bring a bit of joy and wonder along with you. that's my experience anyway.

as for magic, well, I subscribe to the Sir Terry Pratchett school of thought that it doesn't stop being magic just because you found out how it's done.

just take a look at, say, Agrippa's Three Books of Occult Philosophy - especially the early chapters on the properties of the elements - you'll realise that a surprising amount of stuff that Renaissance musicians sought to achieve by alchemy and art we can just. Do now. the method and theory is a fair bit different to what they had in mind, it involves a lot less cosmic rays from the upper spheres and a lot more bottled lightning running over arcane sigils inscribed in magic rocks, but it's still the same stuff: creating images in the air, speaking into someone's ear from a great distance, etc etc etc.

beyond works of Art, there's much magic of the more ephemeral kind - what I suppose CS Lewis would class as magia as opposed to goetia, to misuse a framework - all around us. just walk through a forest, listen to the birds, listen to some live music by a local band no one's ever heard of, share a meal with a friend, watch the sun rise, read a story that changes your brain chemistry then go and do the dishes after.

I mean I could say a whole lot more about what I believe about magic, how it fits into my own epistemology and ontology - but this is already long and rambly enough, and my thoughts are still underdeveloped enough, that I don't especially intend to subject you to them too.

suffice to say that when it comes to believing things I think it is wise to thread the needle between dogma and naïvety, to hold all beliefs lightly (both those you have and those others try to hand to you), now suspending judgement, now taking a line until you have good reason to abandon it, just as long as you stay humble with an eye out for where you might be wrong. i also do believe there is much that is magical and wonderful in the world, and that life is better for taking the time to revel in that wonder.

I hope you find your magic, anon.

#.txt #asks

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nerdy-talks · 10 months

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As someone who’s also had a friend who would only speak to me to vent to them, I completely understand how you’re feeling. It hurts to be used as an emotional dump for others. I had a friend like that and this person would often never ask before venting to me.

Please don’t undermine you’re value as a person and as a friend. You deserve to be cared for and loved. And while I don’t know you personally it’s nice to know there are people who are open and honest with their feelings, even after someone has tried to make them believe they can’t be. It gives me hope about my own personal journey. You are truly amazing.

I wish you the best in your personal journey.

I can not even begin to thank you enough for your extremely kind words, anon! ; _ ;

It honestly makes me so mad when people are mistreated, especially since I know what it's like to be on the receiving end.

But you know what, anon? What you have been through shows what a wonderful and strong person you are. You were there for your "friend". You were a true friend to that person even if they didn't give you the same consideration.

Any type of relationship/friendship only works when it's a two way street. Both sides need to put in equal work. Otherwise... someone will end up getting hurt in one way or another.

I think I just have a difficult time dealing with my own personal issues because I don't want to be the type of person to lash out or overreact or become overbearing/a burden on someone else.

I also don't wanna have to tell someone "hey, can we please talk more frequently?" or "I was there for you, so can you be here for me now?" or "I really want your attention, sooooo... Pay attention to me! Please!" (Especially after I drop hints, get a response like "yeah sure, we'll definitely talk more often!", only for the same b.s. to happen again)

If they don't want to take the initiative and reach out on their own... then I'd prefer to allow my stubborn side to shine and pretty much just say "screw it." Because I'm not gonna try to convince or force someone to do something they don't want to do, ya know?

With all of that being said : I think the best thing you can do is be true to yourself, anon.

I firmly believe in always being completely and wholeheartedly honest no matter what. And while I do have pretty major trust issues, I also believe that being open and receptive towards others is important (depending on comfort level, of course!)

So just be yourself, anon. Never allow anyone to change you or sway you in a different direction. Because a real friend will accept you and love you for who you truly are. A real friend will never judge you or expect you to be someone you aren't.

I know your journey hasn't been easy and you may have a ways left to go until you're able to reach a point where you can be content and happy. But you've got this, anon! You are strong, resilient, and perfect just as you are '•u•'

I genuinely am wishing the very best for you, and I am always here if you ever need/want to talk or vent 💙

#you are worth so much anon!#its so sad when good people like you are treated so poorly #but try to keep your head up #I hope things get better for you #and thank you so much for being so sweet #lovely anon <3 #nerdy replies #nerdy responds #nerdy talks

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its-me-im-coraline · 3 years

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Amalfi Nights // Victoria De Angelis

words // 2766, SHOCK!

warnings // smut, pretty vanilla, softdom!vic, servicetop!vic, praise, kind of fluffy smut

pairing // Victoria De Angelis x F!Reader author's note // if you want to be on the tag list let me know. as far as i gathered the request was about female reader so i did that, i can def change it to gn pronouns but unfortunately don't know how exactly i can make detailed smut entirely gn so i am sorry for that. anyways, i hope you enjoyed it, my smut skills feel rusty but it was nice writing some smut again

request // yes, here

summary // Reader and Victoria are for vacantion in Amalfi. After a candle-lit dinner at the restaurant, after a long day of swimming and sumbathing, Victoria just wants to show you her love.

(i forgot i changed the setting)

It was not unusual for the bassist to overwork herself. Sometimes she did not even realise what she was doing, she just worked mechanically writing, playing… She would ignore everyone and everything that was not her job, as if in some kind of tance that only allowed her to focus on one and only one thing.

The one that was truly affected by that - other than her of course - was her wonderful lover. Y/N had the patience of a saint, in the words of Damiano, being the only one truly able to deal with Victoria’s stubbornness. Some would call it patience, others call it tolerance, others name it thriftiness, Y/N simply calls it love. There was a lot of love targeted at the blonde woman, a love that made her lover unable to just let her push herself to the limit, no matter what she did.

As the ‘thrifty’ characterization indicates, Y/N almost always -with the exception of very few occasions when Victoria had some pretty compelling arguments- found a way to pull her out of that. Usually it was the plain promise of cuddles and kisses, maybe even sex would lure her out of her tiring working cycle, but this time nothing seemed to work. Y/N had to be really inventive this time and luckily it was something possible.

The plan went as such: a vacation at Amalfi, just for a weekend. You just put Victoria in the car and go. Nothing can go wrong. It seemed like a fool-proof plan, and truly it was. It happened to be fairly easy to convince Vic to get in the car. “Just get in or I’ll spend the weekend in Amalfi alone, no phone calls, no pictures. Nothing.” As always, compelling.

It seemed to be the girl’s weakness; Y/N. By the simple threat of not seeing her lover for a weekend, not getting any of the beautiful photos she was sure there would be, Victoria was ready to even teleport to the coast if possible.

Trouble started one Victoria sat herself in that car. From the first moment, when she opened the door, her insatiability was clear. “How long does it take to get there?” “Are we there yet?” “How much longer until we are there?” “When will we stop?” “Let me drive.” “I don’t even need the break.” This is how the entire three and a half hour trip went, with Victoria whining, complaining and asking to drive. It was worse than having a five year old but Y/N would never have it any other way.

Arriving there was a breath of fresh air. The blonde finally stopped asking questions and talking and her partner got the chance to enjoy some peace. It was truly beautiful. The sea, the mountains, the houses and even the hidden buildings, it seemed like out of a fairy tale, Y/N wasting no time expressing that thought. Victoria, being a few meters away, basking in the scenery, responded swiftly by walking back to her lover, leaving kisses up her face. “It’s only so beautiful because I have you here.”

Oh that sweet talk of hers, enough to make anyone melt, melt to their knees and beg for her love. Y/N felt helpless around her girlfriend, not in a bad way, although it could certainly be dangerous, but in a way of… being drunk, drunk in love, drunk by her beauty, by her personality. It was never about her looks and always about how Victoria could always lift the girl off her feet with only her words. She’d feel like she’s floating every time they are together, floating in the most beautiful dream.

The day passed by smoothly, the pair spending it under the sun and into the sea, they only stopped when the sun seemed to be setting. She might have not known how to show it exactly but Victoria was extremely thankful for the partner she had, knowing the lengths the other woman would go for her. She thought of the best way to show her just that, maybe with some dinner, the atmosphere was utterly romantic; the Amalfi coast, sunset hour was nearing, she had her lover right there, and all the means to show her how she felt. So she moved on with the plan.

After arriving in the hotel, Vic rushed to get herself ready first, hoarding the bathroom, winning herself enough time to set up the dinner.

“I’ll be showering now,” called Y/N, “might take a while, I think I burned my shoulders a bit…”

“Don’t forget to get ready while you’re there. We need to be ready the soonest possible if we want to explore!”

Her girlfriend hummed in response, Victoria having an inner dance party -and feeling bad for it- before going down the lobby to arrange everything with the hotel. From Y/N’s favorite food, to her favorite wine and even favourite flowers, everything was set to perfection. It was done surprisingly fast, the blonde woman taking an active role in it, realising how last minute it was. By the time Y/N was showered, dressed and ‘fancied up’ her girlfriend had everything but the food set. But it was not of the utmost importance, knowing that they could wait for it a bit.

“Hey, babe, I’m dr- essed… What did you do?” She smiled, mesmerized by the view in front of her. The balcony of their hotel room was set like a dream. Flowers on the table, two glasses for wine and said wine next to the table. She wasn’t sure how to react to such action.

“I only wanted to thank you, amore. You do so much for me, caring for me, baring my stubbornness. For fuck’s sake you brought me here cause I’m over worked,” she breathed out the last few words, unable to speak properly before moving to her girlfriend to kiss her.

“I simply love you,” Victoria whispered against Y/N’s lips, moving her to her chair before occupying her own.

The whole dinner revolved around the two just exchanging glances and flirty words. “You're hot, delicious, you look scrumptious,” one of them would say, a hungry look on her face, the other blushing, almost jumping from her chair. It was torture to just sit so close yet so far away from each other.

“Just move closer to me, dolcessa,” breathed out Victoria, signaling for the other girl to move her chair closer. Y/N did not hesitate to obey her girlfriend’s suggestion, quickly shuffling herself next to Victoria.

“Bravo ragazza. You obey very well, amore.” If it had been possible for Y/N to keep any sinful thoughts at bay before everything went out the window immediately as the blonde opened her mouth. “It will be extremely useful after dinner is over. Mhm,” she paused, leaving kisses on her girlfriend’s neck, “I am thinking, second course?”

Everything after that moment was a blur. The pair did not even get the chance to finish their dinner before Victoria had dragged her lover inside the room and pinned her right next to the window. Her kisses were hot and sloppy but Y/N would be lying if she said she’s complaining. If anything this moment is all she’s been waiting for today. The blonde never stopped her ‘attack’, moving closer and closer to Y/N’s sweet spot, assaulting the spot with the lips, her teeth and her tongue, taking special care of it.

Her trail only lowered as she kept on kissing and leaving marks all over, hands on her partner’s waist, lips on the swell of her chest. “You know this shirt drives me crazy, dolcezza! Of course you do. That’s why you wore it, huh?” Y/N couldn’t speak, all ability to form words and sounds was taken away by her lover. “Speak to me amore, this isn’t the time to be naughty.”

“That’s why I wore it,” responded the helpless girl, slowly being undressed by her lover.

“Well, it’s a shame it’s going away, no?” And with that the shirt was removed entirely, leaving Y/N’s chest almost fully exposed to Victoria, her action did not waver, though. She kept her direction to the girl’s bottoms, kissing above the top of her pants before throwing a questioning look up. Y/N only nodded eagerly, giving Victoria the permission she needed to presume her actions, removing the pants without much thought or effort.

“It is not fair, Vic,” whined Y/N, eyes semi closed with the pleasure the other girl’s feathery touch around her body provided, “you are overdressed.”

“You’re right, puppy,” she responded, swiftly getting up, dropping a kiss and seductively moving towards the bed. “Why don’t you come and return the favor? I got so tired undressing you, now you’ll have to it for me,” she taunted, smirking evidently as she held her self up by her arms, legs semi open on the bed, eyes eye-fucking her lover already.

A little bit of encouragement was all Y/N to get a little confidence and take the lead a bit. “Tell me if you want me to stop,” she whispered in Victoria's ear and started copying her girlfriend’s previous actions.

Her hands were going everywhere, unsure of where to stay or whether they should stay still. Eventually they moved under her shirt, massaging her chest there, emitting a series of moans to leave Victoria’s mouth. “Too much fabric,” she mumbled on Vic’s skin, opting to remove said fabric, making all access so much easier and revealing the beautiful lingerie underneath.

“So pretty you are Victoria. What a beauty. I got lucky, now, didn’t I?” The focus shifted on the woman’s chest. Her nipples were poking through the bra, doing very little to cover anything, but the goal was never to hide.

“Work on my boobs, baby, go on,” encouraged Victoria after noticing Y/N’s hyperfixation on said body parts. “I know you love it.”

No thought occurred before the last girl did as told. Lips left kisses and marks all over Victoria’s chest, paying special attention to the line above her bra. Her hands moved swiftly behind Vic’s back, unclasping her bra, removing it and moving to attack her nipples. They were perky due to the breeze entering the room through the open balcony door but also from the arousal. Y/N loved to love them, always one of her favorite things to do in bed. She loved to suck on them, to kiss them, even lick around them or pop her in and out her mouth like cherries.

Y/N was not the only one to enjoy the attention she gave them. Victoria would be lying if she said she did not get wetter and wetter whenever her partner gave her nipples so much love. It was possibly the hottest view, to look at her from above, gazes aligned, such delicious noises released by both lovers; wet sounds and moans. The whole scene was beautifully pornographic, straight out of a movie, so theatrical but genuinely felt.

The lower girl decided on the next move without a warning, slowly moving her hand to move under Vic’s fancy shorts. The discovery there made her insane, and only then did she really get sure that her girlfriend had planned for this to happen. The lingerie set seemed complete, not that it mattered that much anymore, the panties got most likely slightly ruined by just how wet Victoria was. No prep was needed, not much effort at all, she was entirely ready for anything, a fact that made Y/N feel proud of her work so far. Without a word, one of her fingers started pumping in and out of the blonde. Such a wonderful scene, the delicious movements of them both, the divine moans the blonde let out… It was a plain dream that neither of them wanted to get out of. Everything just felt perfect, like an all time high, and maybe it was just that, a high, one that both found themselves in quite often.

“This,” began Victoria, struggling to speak between her moans and thrusts on Y/N’s fingers, “was supposed to be a thank you from me to you, cucciola. Agh,” she struggled again, the pleasure just being too much, fingers deep inside her with constant friction on her clit.

“Stop, oh my, stop, amore. I want your mouth,” she all but screamed, rushing to unbutton and remove her shorts, all but ripping her panties off. Y/N simply shuffled to her knees in front of the bed, settling between Vic’s open legs and diving right in.

Not taking almost any time to breathe in between, just kissing her clit and ramming her fingers in and out of Victoria as her hands rested on her lover’s head, pushing her closer every time a wave of pleasure took over her. Her tongue was everywhere, the one moment lapping over Vic’s clit and the next one assisting her fingers inside the blonde. The whole ordeal had her pulsing and shaking underneath Y/N resulting in her cumming all over the girl's face with no warning.

“That was so hot,” giggled Y/N, getting up to leave kisses all over Vic’s face, absolutely adoring the whole fucked out expression she held. “I want to do it again,” she continued, just like a kid in a candy store, eyes gleaming with excitement.

“No, no, puppy! You were so good to me, but now it’s your time. You deserve to be loved.” It was all mumbled, but her tone was always authoritative.

“Just move to the bed, love.” With that Y/N did as told, moving onto the bed and spreading her legs, just like Victoria liked. Her back was on the headboard, leaning there to be more comfortable, hands already touching her own chest in anticipation.

“Keep the bra, cucciola, but I think the panties need to go… Mhm, not that I don’t like them, but they get in the way. Can you remove them for me?” It was not really a question but her lover still gave a small yes as a response. “I feel like you deserve a very good reward, puppy, don’t you agree?”

Y/N was sitting there in awe and staring at her partner, maybe a little worried by the toy or maybe just excited for the up and coming event. Giving pleasure to Victoria had only made her more hot and bothered, unable to wait for the said blonde to act.

And she acted, swiftly removing the black lace panties her enamoured bottom was wearing after she left kisses all around the line of them. It’s that moment she saw the effect she gained over the girl for the night; her panties were absolutely soaked, in a lot of spots not being able to distinguish skin from the fabric of the undergarment, making her salivate at the sight, opting to kiss her wet pussy over and over, stimulating her before working her magic.

Victoria started off slow, a very rhythmic tempo but tortuous at the same time. She went from one finger to two and three and then added her mouth into the mix, hiding herself between her favorite girl’s thighs, getting lost in the taste and the noise.

“You are doing so good, my love, taking my fingers so well, mhm, such a good girl.” The praise never stopped, only encouraging more and more sinful noises to leave Y/N’s lips, the same ones that were parted the whole time, swollen and begging to be kissed. Victoria did not hesitate to do exactly that, allowing Y/N to taste her juices, the kiss doing little to conceal the confirmation of pleasure.

As Vic’s pace quickened, Y/N was struggling to keep it together, falling apart in the blonde’s hands, cummiing with a loud moan and a series of curses as she was left there, in bliss; in afterglow. “Be a doll and drink this, precious,” whispered Victoria, giving some water to the girl, before following her own advice and doing the same. After, she moved to the hotel room bathroom, quickly finding a small towel to wet with warm water and clean both of them up.

By the time she walked back in the bedroom Y/N was practically asleep on the bed, sprawled out, just as she was left, as soft breaths left her. Victoria smiled at herself, proceeding with cleaning her girlfriend up before leaving a kiss on her forehead and getting in the bed, following suit and falling asleep.

tag list: @bieberhoodforever @tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina @the-killer-queenie @makapaka11

#victoria de angelis imagine #victoria de angelis #maneskin imagine #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin #måneskin #måneskin x reader #måneskin imagine #måneskin fanfic

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3desiderium3 · 3 years

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For your love

chapter five - On my own

[ series masterlist ]

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings : reader x damiano david

story summary : damiano and reader are in very loving relationship that sometimes almost too quickly becomes too toxic for anyone likings

chapter warning (s) : this is sad i made myself sad

" It was a pretty rough night not gonna lie .. She barely managed to fall asleep around 8 am . I woke up a few times to check upon her cause she had her nose clogged from all that crying . "

Victoria said over phone to Thomas .

It was around one in the noon . She was frying some eggs and vegetables for her and Y/N to eat .

" How did it went over there ? " "Jesus I wish I knew honestly . "

Thomas admitted sighing .

" When he came here last night he was crying . Like really hard . It took him 30 minutes to calm down and tell me what he did .. " " And ? " " I tried punching him in the face but I ended up hurting my hand more . " Vic chuckled upon the thought of Thomas hitting someone , especially Damiano .

" And I don't know he just continued to cry and smoke cigs . I swear to Jesus he smoked like whole 3 packs in one night . I am not sure when he fell asleep or if he did . But there was not much talking here trust me . "

Both of them went silent . Not being able to choose one side . Both Y/N and Damiano where their long known friends and dear people in general .

" Y/N is more than my best friend . She is my family . I would do anything that I can to keep her safe , just like with you . That's why I am feeling so guilty upon meeting her with Damiano. "

" Hon' it was not your fault remember ? " The other line was silent .

" Have you ever wondered how it would look like if they didn't end up together ? "

" Yeah .. I mean maybe .. You know I did often when I found myself in between their arguments . "

" Pft please , they where soft near you comparing to their usual . "

Thomas lighted up his cigarette , the sound of him taking a drag was pretty clear .

" I almost left the band cause of them remember ? At that period Damiano and I had lots of small fights and arguments . "

Vic turned off the stove placing the food in plates skillfully.

" Hold up I need to give Y/N breakfast . " " Aight I'm waitin' . "

" Babes are you awake ? " The blond girl called out for her friend . Y/N was laying on her side of the bed , all the sheets and pillows where thrown in the corner of the room . She didn't wanted anything that smelled like Damiano near her . Instead she slept on bare mattress , Victoria's traveling pillow and she covered herself with the blanket from living room .

" I am not hungry yet , can you just please leave the plate here ? "

" Sure I'll be downstairs . Just call . "

No respond , she just closed the door behind her after glancing at Y/N last time .

Vic was cleaning the stinky apartment whole morning , it was not bothering her in fact . She knew Y/N would do the same for her .

" Tom you there ? " She cooed once her phone was in her grasp again . " Yeah yeah I was talking to Damiano . " " Is he alright ? " " I am not sure really . I think not obviously , but now after this I am not expecting anything normal from him ever again . " " Oh come on it was a - " " If you just dare to finish the sentence I will kill you . How can that be an accident ?? Rape is not an accident ! He was fully aware Victoria !! " " Pshh be quite you idiot ! " She tried hushing her friend after turning around herself paranoid like someone overheard their conversation .

" He is showering now don't worry . We should not be taking sides on this one but Vic .. He is not good for her ... Neither is she for him .. This is lasting for 3 years .. Remember ? "

" Don't fucking remind me . "

Silence . Both of them trying to understand the policy of their friends relationship .

" He threatened to kill himself so many times if she leaves him .. "

" She was so heartbroken each time that she was the one actually considering suicide . "

" I remember one time they had some huge fight as always and she came to my house in like 3 am crying and talking some nonsenses . "

" They never had a filter , especially around us , sometimes it gets just too tiring ya know ? "

" They made me and Ethan cry so many times Jesus Vic you have the biggest nerve here . " Her friend admitted with chuckle.

" Should we like ... talk to them each day and convince them to break up ? "

Deadly silence .

One was sure . Y/N and Damiano shouldn't ever be together again .

" Are we bad friends for doing this ? " " Pft please , we are doing service to everyone . "

" I am so confused and so worried for Y/N , I will talk to Damiano later and then call you to see if something improved and to update you . How is Y/N feeling now ? "

" Not so good bro , I think she is considering that breakup as well . Everything is still so confusing and not in order . "

" Alright Vic , gonna call later , bye love you . "

" Love you too bye . "

* meanwhile in Thomas house *

Thomas hanged up his half hour long conversation with Victoria . He rubbed his eyes hardly throwing the cellphone on the kitchen table where he was standing smoking .

To be honest he was also crying with Damiano last night . He couldn't imagine the amount of pain Y/N was suffering . His still pulsing bruised hand started to feel a bit better . He regretted only hitting Damiano , but they all knew he was the weakest out of all boys in the group .

Damiano was laying in his bed dressed in his chlotes fresh out of shower.

Crying again .

It was slowly starting to make Thomas mad .

' Why didn't he cry last night when he abused her? '

" Oi , whats the matter now ? Why are you crying again ? Cause you are an asshole or complete idiot ? " " Thomas shut the fuck up . I am not capable of having that conversation . " Damiano's voice was raspy and cracked .

" Well we are gonna have this conversation , in fact right now . Where where your tears last night when you raped her ? " " It wasn't ra -" " It was ! You fucked her without her consent ! What the fuck where you thinking ! "

" I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING ! "

He stood up from the bed crying his bottom lip shaking .

" I DON'T FUCKING KNOW ! I WAS MAD AT HER ! MICHAEL WAS THERE ! I HAD THE WORST SCENARIOS RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD I GOT SCARED ! "

Thomas was in slight shock . Was Damiano really that dumb ?

" Are you serious ? I can't actually believe how selfish and egoistic you are . You raped my best friend because you got mad at her that her ex was there ? "

This was actually the first time in 3 years someones words affected Damiano about his behavior towards Y/N . He sat back on the bed holding his head in his hands .

" I took you in cause I care about you . You are my friend . But I will never forgive you this . You can stay here as much as you want but don't expect any special treatment from me . "

" Should I call her ? I must apologize . "

Thomas snorted .

" No . You must not apologize , you must beg her on your knees to forgive you . You must beg her to even look at you . I know I wouldn't if I was her . No matter what you do she will love you forever and that is the problem . "

Damiano was highly affected by his friends words. In his mind he was only picturing whimpering Y/N whose head he was holding down with his hand , her tears where soaked up on that backseat .

'I will rather die than look her in the eyes again.'

* meanwhile in Y/N's house *

" Are you sure I am not bothering ? I can always ask Thomas to stay with him ? " Y/N asked Victoria while both of them where packing some of Y/N's stuff in the suitcase .

" Yeah absolutely , we are going to spend some quality time healing and having fun . "

Y/N made her final decision , she was going to break up with Damiano this time for real .

She didn't have that much of her stuff , all the clothes , jewelry , letters , poems and all the other gifts she received from Damiano she placed in on huge box and left it on the center of their bed .

" Can I tell Thomas you are staying with me ? "

"Yes but alarm him not to tell Damiano .. I do not wanna hear a word from him . "

Vic simply nodded and in a less than an hour they where all packed leaving the past behind .

* three weeks later *

Things where only worse for our lovers .

Damiano heard no word from Y/N and neither did she from him .

She was expecting it to be honest .

Everyday was same as the other . Too long , too cold and filled with cigarette smoke .

All Y/N did was sometimes leave her room when she didn't wanted to offend Vic after putting effort into preparing the meal , she would listen to whatever record Victoria had , smoke all the cigarettes till she vomited , drink vodka away from her roommates sight and cry herself everyday regretting her whole relationship .

' He never fucking loved me .. I cheated on Michael with him just so he could fuck me over .. He never loved me .. He was just obsessed and he wanted me in his possession '

The fact Damiano didn't try reaching her was painful , it was providing sharp stings in her chest and it gave her headaches .

She saw him in every song , he was always on her mind . She wished she could delete all the memories and feelings just like she deleted the pictures . . .

Damiano was not much different than her .

He was also crying a lot , smoking a lot , not drinking but overthinking . He didn't knew Y/N moved out .. No one understood why it took him 3 weeks to try and reach her .

He didn't understood either .

He was trying to come up with the perfect apologize . He wanted to show her he was willing to do better . Willing to change . To prove her he was ready to change . He was sure that Y/N wouldn't return his calls . She understood her . He expected her to be mad and stubborn she had every reason to be .

Thomas was barely speaking to him . Only some formalities . Måneskin was put on hold their rehearsals , Vic and Thomas being very strict in their communication with Damiano while Ethan was very confused and unsure of what is going on .

Damianos mom and Y/N's parents also weren't included in the situation .

The day he planned on returning home , so sure that he would be greeted by her embrace , came .

He shaved his face for the first time in 3 weeks , he changed his underwear for the first time in 3 weeks , he wore simple suit and he drove all the way into the depths of the town to buy the most glorious flowers that his Y/N loved .

He wasn't planning on just winning her over with some flowers and gifts , or the dialog he practiced in his head and in front of his mirror .

Upon reaching the yard of their house he frowned . There was something different . Something wrong . .

He was walking slowly , looking all around himself , gripping the bouquet of flowers in his sweaty palm .

He stood in front of the door .

It was wrong . Something was wrong .

His mind scream . He hoped he was very paranoid once again .

His hand rose up to ring the door bell . He was nervous and afraid .

You are being worried for no reason .

He kept reasurinf himself.

So he rang .

Once

Twice

Four times . Four long times .

No one opened .

Was she home ? After all he came unannounced . Maybe she is sleeping ?

" Y/N! Y/N it's me ! Please open the door ! "

He was starting to sweat .

He searched with his shaking hands through his pocket to find the house keys . He unlocked the door . The house was empty and cold .

It was not smelling like her . Cause there was no one , she wasn't home . Not for an hour , not for the day , not here in a while .

He kept calling for her . " Y/N ! " He dropped the keys and flowers on the kitchen table .

He started roaming the house in panic . Even trying to sense some sort of smell . He was afraid she killed herself so his nose searched for the rotting corpse smell.

Every bad scenarios possible went through his head .

He ran towards their room . Empty .

Even their pets weren't there . She was gone .

Y/N left him . For real this time . For good .

He started to breath heavily . Tears forming in his eyes . The big box on their bed .

Inside of it all his gifts to her . All his clothes she loved wearing . He took one hoodie she often every time she was cleaning . He placed it under his nose . It still held her scent . Her ghost was there , in the shape of the memories one cardboard box held .

He was crying , repeating her name , calling it out . Kissing her dresses and watering them with tears .

He was on his own . There was no one he wanted more than her . He realized what he had once he lost it . He was alone for the first time .

taglist : @ella-nordstrm3 , @urskaa , @lovelysaltyland , @littleachaos , @whoreforhenrycavill , @13journals , @onceuponparrilla , @21nell , @davedace101 , @vainbimbo , @aliyeaz , @vandafabryova , @miriampraez , @foggyhottubcandy , @daringovangel , @inr89

#damiano david #damiano maneskin #maneskin #italy #zitti e buoni #eurosong #eurovision #eurovision 2021 #eurovision italy #victoria de an #ethan torchio #thomas raggi #fanfic #sad #romance #relationship #breakup #lovers

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tommybaholland · 3 years

Note

may I have some hcs for how noya, suga, suna, and maybe??? tsuki (I didn't see him in your list of characters you currently write for, so I wasn't sure if you would write for him if I requested him, so I understand if you don't) react to their s/o who's in a sports team (in high school if possible unless you prefer to age them up I understand!) too (I'm not specifying/choosing so other readers can feel included!) injuring their knee during practice, but not taking it seriously and they just limp around everywhere instead of going to the doctor or trying to do something to feel better. I went too hard on badminton practice yesterday and I literally cannot bend, or put weight on my knee right now so I'm just limping around cause I'm too scared to ask my mom if she can take me to the hospital sjjjdjshs. Don't be like me pls🧍‍♀️as someone who's injured several muscles over 2 times I am begging to take this seriously if you ever get injured, I hope you're taking care of yourself!! :))

when their s/o tries to hide an injury

featuring: nishinoya, sugawara, and suna

yes, unfortunately, i don’t write for tsukki right now, but here are the other three :) i’ll let the writing do the talking, but take it easy and i hope you feel better soon!

nishinoya

he’s probably the least observant and that doesn’t mean he can’t take a hint when something’s wrong with you

but he usually doesn’t find out about it until after something happens

you two have quite the playful relationship and are no strangers to playing fighting or jumping onto each other

one day at school, he snuck up behind you to hop onto your back as he often did

and normally you wouldn’t mind and can handle it because he’s as light as a feather

but today your back didn’t take it so well as you let out a strained gasped at feeling his weight put pressure onto it

“hey, my beautiful, sweet, gorgeous-- hey, are you okay? did i hurt you?”

you knew you were going to have to have this conversation with him eventually but of course, you were too late

you wince as you try to stand up straight again, explaining that your back was already hurting from practice

“oh, well, then you should probably go see the nurse. can’t have you hurting, gorgeous.”

you promise him that it’s okay and you probably just need to stretch it out later

he hesitantly accepts your answer, but worries about you all-day long

it makes him usually quiet

so he decides that he can’t let you tolerate your pain

on your way to the gym after school for practice, you find him waiting outside

“you can’t practice today, babe.”

you actually get a little annoyed at him for trying to tell you what you can and can’t do

“oh, you’re fine? okay, then-- oops, i dropped my pen. can you pick it up for me? it’s closer to you.”

you knew where this was going

but your back said otherwise and you barely hinged forward before it felt like someone was literally stabbing you in the back

“see? you can barely bend over. i’m taking you to the nurse or a doctor or something so you can get better.”

he grabs your hand and starts leading you away when you stop and ask him about your practice and volleyball

“i talked to the coach before you got here and they agree with me. i can miss one day of practice. the rest of them would probably do the same for their s/o and besides most of them still suck at receiving so they can practice that and serving at the same time!”

you still don’t look convinced so he brings you closer to him by tugging lightly on the bottom of your school uniform

“don’t worry, beautiful. i got it all sorted out, okay?”

you finally nod and he seals his promise with a small kiss

“listen, you’re my strong, beautiful, gorgeous, smart s/o and i love you! i’ll try to pay more attention to you but i need you to let me know when you’re hurting..”

he couldn’t let you get away with a small scolding bc his oblivious ass loves you too much

sugawara

he observes but tries not to make a big deal out of it or bring it up in a confrontational way

you had a slight limp on the way to school and on the way home with him after both of your practices finished

he invited you over to hang out for a bit before your curfew and he notices that you struggled a little to sit down next to him on his bed like you were in pain

“sugar, are you alright?” he asked, his hand rubbing across your back

you tell him you’re fine

“okay...are you sure? i’m pretty sure you’ve been limping this entire day and just now it looked like it hurt to sit down.”

you admit that your hip has been bothering you ever since practice the day before and you thought it would just get better over time

“well, how bad is the pain?”

it’s not too bad, you think

he has you lay down and he tries to examine you a bit himself

“does it hurt when i lift your leg like this?”

he slowly tries to lift it to a ninety-degree angle but a sharp pain shoots right into your hip

you wince and tense up at the pain

he frowns as he immediately puts your leg down, “it’s only your hip, right? your knee doesn’t hurt or anything?”

you shake your head, still tense from the pain that it’s causing you

he lays down next to you, rubbing a soothing hand up and down you arm, “aww, i’m sorry it hurts so much, sweetness, but-- wait, you didn’t go to practice like this did you?

well, the karma was certainly hitting

he sighs, “babe, why would you-- never mind, i think you need to go see the doctor.”

that’s when the tears start to fall

he pulls you into his arms upon seeing your tears, “i know you don’t wanna go, sweetheart, but you need to get this checked out. i just hate seeing you in so much pain and they can help you feel better.”

you hate the doctor

it just makes you just feel like more of a helpless burden

“you’re not a burden, sugar. this looks serious and you shouldn’t be in so much pain. i don’t think we should let it go any longer so let’s get you bundled up in some of my sweatpants and that one sweater you like. i’ll take you and be there for you the entire time, okay?”

gives you a few reassuring kisses and lets you lay there with him for a bit longer before you get ready to go

he would never let his sweet s/o suffer and always stays true to his word

and you bet that he’ll be there when you’re confined to bed rest, making sure you’re not overexerting yourself so he can see your beautiful smile again

suna

he’s the most observant out of these three and won’t hesitate to ask about it

he didn’t see you much during the day at school but he walked you home almost every day after practice and usually ended up staying for dinner

so he always had that to look forward to

he was surprised when he got a glance of you outside the gym earlier than normal

and he really got curious when he saw how off-balanced and wobbly you seemed

you waited outside for him, not wanting to interrupt practice

you had skipped your own practice that day, seeing that nobody knew you had hurt your knee

but you knew suna would find out eventually so you were just trying to figure out what to tell him

“hey, so when were you going to tell me that you’re hurt?”

he was so quiet and stealthy that you didn’t even notice him standing there with all his stuff, ready to leave for the day

he was never less than confrontational

“and don’t try to hide it from me, babe. i can see the limp in your step.”

your knee has been hurting since practice the other day and it wasn’t getting any better

“i see. have you tried icing it or anything?”

the habitual blank expression in his face had turned downward as you shook your head

“baby, how many times do i have to tell you? you can’t just let things like this go. it’s not good for you.”

you tell him not to tell your parents or make you go to the doctor because it doesn’t hurt that bad

“of course. i can’t make you do anything, but let’s at least try putting some ice on it and elevating it first, okay?”

you agree and then he tries to pick you up, insisting on carrying you all the way home

“babe, i can do it. i’ve got a strong core, remember?”

you’re still refusing him like, ‘pls chill, i’m not dying’

“okay, but hold onto me when you need. and here, do you want to wear this? it’s a bit cold out.”

he gives you his team jacket to wear

you begin walking and you realize you’re more unsteady than you thought

he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you into his side, and has you wrap an arm around his shoulders so he can steady you a little more

once you get to his house, he gets you all set up in his bed with ice and your leg propped up on a few pillows

then he makes sure you’re all cozy with plenty of blankets and him snuggled up beside you

he doesn’t look like it but he loves to dote on you even when you’re being stubborn <3

hold on haikyuu night!! there’s more if you want to request..

#haikyuu x reader #nishinoya x reader #nishinoya fluff #nishinoya headcanon #sugawara x reader #sugawara fluff #sugawara headcanon #suna x reader #suna fluff #suna headcanon #tommybaholland

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pilvimarja · 3 years

Text

Prompt used: I'm sure you can figure it out

(Post-season 3, new relationship, shameless PWP, coming dry, s3x toy, some dirty talk, Daniel is insatiable but they're old men)

Johnny's woken up by two things. One: someone's sitting on his lap. And two: there's a hand on his dick.

"Daniel?"

"Come on, Johnny, I-I need it again."

Johnny blinks the grit of sleep from his eyes, half convinced that he's dreaming, because yeah, Daniel definitely has one hand on Johnny’s dick and one in his own ass, the wet squelch of lube loud in the stunned silence between them.

"Jesus, LaRusso…" Johnny glances at the alarm clock, does a little math in his head and lets out a stunned snort of laughter. "It's 2 am. I fucked you less than three hours ago."

Daniel blows out a frustrated whine as he works his hand on Johnny's cock. "I know but—"

"You need it again," Johnny smirks, wiggling his brows. "Yeah, I heard you."

Daniel is barely half-hard, but he looks desperate, fucking his fingers in and out of himself, and he makes a valiant effort to get Johnny's dick interested, pulling all the tricks, but Johnny’s still recovering from their previous workout. They did some sparring after Daniel finished his paperwork at the dealership, one thing led to another, which in turn led them to the bedroom (after a stop at the kitchen counter) and Johnny definitely feels it in his obliques. And his dick.

"Sorry, man. I don't think it's getting up for a few more hours."

Daniel purses his lips and let's go of Johnny's cock, but judging by the stubborn groove between his brows, he's not ready to give up. He reaches for the nightstand, and Johnny lets out an annoyed oof at the sudden elbow in his stomach as Daniel begins to rummage through the drawer.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Daniel bites his lip, his smile sly in the blue shadows. "I'm not doing anything, you are," he pulls out a giant dildo and slaps Johnny in the chest with it, "with this."

Johnny blinks at the fake dick. "Uh. I am?" He's been fucking Daniel long enough to know the guy loves to be stuffed full of cock, but apparently not long enough to know that any cock will do.

Daniel presses a kiss to the stunned O of Johnny's mouth. "Don't look so scandalized. You should know what I like by now."

"Oh trust me, LaRusso, I know," Johnny huffs, reaching behind Daniel's back to rub at his hole. His fingers sink in like a hot knife through butter. “You're insatiable." He fucks Daniel with three thick fingers until his mouth falls open around a satisfied groan. “So fucking loose. And wet. You should let me fuck you raw more often."

Daniel throws his head back and clenches around Johnny's fingers. "Come on, Johnny, you sure you can’t go again?"

Johnny glares at his traitorous cock, limp against the crook of his thigh. "Afraid not. Unless you have a DeLorean."

"A what?" Daniel snorts, his slender fingers gliding over slick silicone as he lubes his toy. "Oh, I get it. You wanna go back in time and give it to me all over again?"

"Nah, man, I'd go straight to '85 and fuck you without any stupid dick charging breaks."

Daniel rolls his eyes, the arch of his brows skeptical. "You really think we could have made this work right after high school?” He points at himself and pokes at Johnny’s chest. “Seriously? Us?"

Johnny shrugs, feeling optimistic. "I don't know, you were pretty cute back then. Too bad you were also an obnoxious little punk who liked to steal other guys' girlfriends."

Daniel puffs his chest and opens his mouth to argue, but Johnny pulls him down by his hair, stopping the oncoming tirade with a sleep-stale kiss.

"Relax, LaRusso, you know we’re past all that shit." He gives Daniel another kiss and pinches his ass. "Though you're still an obnoxious little punk." Daniel gives him another smack with the dildo, leaving a wet lube stain on Johnny's left pec. "Hey! You want that thing in your ass or not?"

Daniel sticks his bottom lip out in a pout that should look ridiculous on a middle-aged man, but somehow it works as well as it did thirty years ago.

“I do.”

He settles over Johnny's thighs and gifts him with a view of his ass, round and marked with Johnny’s own hand prints from earlier, and how the hell can his dick sleep through a sight like this, Johnny will never understand.

He grabs the dildo and lets it flop from side to side, doing his best not to laugh. “So, uh, how’s this supposed to work?”

Daniel grins at Johnny over his shoulder, gives a little shrug. “I’m sure you can figure it out, big guy.”

Yeah, sure. Johnny can figure it out. He knows how to screw Daniel's brains out, doesn’t matter if the dick isn’t attached to him. He parts Daniel’s cheeks with his thumbs and takes a moment to appreciate the view, rubbing at the loose gape of his rim.

Some of the babes he dated before Shannon were pretty wild in the sack, but no one’s wanted him like Daniel who's kind of making Johnny forget that he's a washed up, fifty-tree-year-old, somewhat functioning alcoholic.

He’d half-expected things to simmer down after the first couple of months, but the fire’s still burning hot and he’s starting to think he and LaRusso might be in a… committed relationship or something a lot like it, because the last time someone cooked for him, touched his dick without forcing him to grovel for it, and curled up against his side at night (and drooled on his shoulder, because the secret behind Daniel LaRusso's charming car salesman smile is a goofy retainer), well, it's been a while.

“Come on, Johnny, don’t make me wait,” Daniel whines, tilting his hips like he’s presenting himself.

Johnny crooks his fingers and finds Daniel’s prostate, circling it until Daniel shivers in his lap. “Say please.”

“You’re—ah—the worst.” Daniel glares at him over his shoulder, eyes full of fire. He twists his mouth into a sour line, but he must be real desperate, because there's a quiet please in the breath that leaves his lips.

“There you go. That wasn't so hard," Johnny grins. He sets the toy over Daniel’s hole and watches it stretch around the blunt head as Daniel sinks down on it, the wings of his shoulder blades shifting under his tan skin.

“Fuck. I’d forgotten how big it is,” Daniel pants, but he takes it like a champ, grinding down on it until Johnny's knuckles are pressed into his ass, “but not as big as you.”

Johnny lets out a quiet laugh at the blatant flattery, but his ego’s not threatened by a silicone toy. He knows how much Daniel enjoys the real thing, but he does have some questions.

“How long have you had this thing?

“A while…” Daniel says, clearing his throat.

“Oh yeah?” There are some things they don’t talk about, the big D word that wasn't finalized until recently being one of them, but Johnny has a feeling that Daniel was taking it up the ass long before he and Amanda called it quits. “You use it when I’m not here?”

“Sometimes. You want me to give you a show, Johnny?” Daniel asks, voice raspy like he’s seventeen again, and yeah, Johnny totally would have fucked his tiny Italian ass if he hadn’t been such a mess throughout their senior year.

He tightens his grip on the dildo and gives Daniel’s bruised ass cheek a slap. “Yeah, show me how well you take a cock, LaRusso.”

Daniel breathes in, slow and deep like he does when they do kata, and starts to fuck himself on the toy. And what a show it is. Johnny feels a hot punch of arousal in his gut, watching Daniel’s pink rim stretch taut around the shaft as he sinks down on it over and over again.

And he’s definitely used it before, angling his hips and rides the toy, and there’s a weird disconnect between Johnny's senses. He smells Daniel’s sweat, strong and musky because Johnny didn't let him shower earlier, hears the throaty grunts rolling past his lips, but there’s no slick heat around his cock, and maybe it’s the power of will or sheer jealousy, but he finally begins to chub up against his thigh.

“Well, I'll be damned." He gives himself a couple of strokes and pulls the toy out of Daniel's ass.

"Hey! Why'd you—"

"You ready for the real thing?”

Daniel looks over his shoulder, his eyes fuck-hazy and half-lidded. “Huh?”

Johnny gives him a lopsided smirk and rubs his cock against Daniel's lube-slick hole.

“Oh, John,” Daniel throws his head back and lets Johnny feed his cock into him, clenching around the shaft. “You got it up for me.”

“‘Course I did,” Johnny pants, curling his fingers around Daniel’s hips as he thrusts up, grinning at the surprised cry of pleasure that punches out of Daniel's lungs. “I know how much you wanted it.” He gets his hand on Daniel’s cock and gives it a good, firm tug. “Needy slut.”

"Mmmh."

Johnny’s got no idea why Daniel blows a fuse whenever he calls him names during class or sparring sessions, tame stuff like princess or sugar tits, but when they’re in the bedroom, the filth that comes out of Johnny’s mouth drives him fucking wild.

He fucks into Daniel as hard as he can with a back that’s sore from training and fifty plus years of mileage. Daniel's doing most of the work, though, riding Johnny like it's their first time all over again. Johnny lets his hands wander over his wiry muscles and parts that are soft with age, cups Daniel's little tits to feel them jiggle against his palms.

"Johnny... Johnny."

Johnny pinches Daniel's nipples and gives him a couple of hard, rapid thrusts until Daniel lets out a high-pitched wail, his legs trembling against Johnny’s thighs as he spurts out a few watery drops of come.

Johnny’s own orgasm hits him like a freight train and he grits his molars together, arching up from the bed as he teeters on the edge of pleasure and pain, and Christ, is he even jizzing?

Daniel has worn him out before, but Johnny sinks into the mattress like his limbs are made out of lead, dick so raw that he whimpers when Daniel slides off it.

“You okay?” Daniel asks, hovering over Johnny, stroking his fingers through his sweat-matted hair.

Johnny blinks up at him, his vision swimming with bright shapes. “Y-yeah.”

“That was pretty intense, huh?” Daniel laughs, curling against Johnny’s flank, sweat-slick and hot like a furnace. He rolls his neck until he hears a satisfying crack and rests his head on Johnny’s shoulder. “Maybe we should drop the balance wheel from tomorrow’s lesson?”

Johnny lets out a slightly horrified wheeze of laughter. “You really think we’re even getting out of this bed after that workout?”

“We could take a personal day?” Daniel says, grinning up at Johnny. He trails his fingers through the sparse hairs between Johnny's pecks and drags them down over the swell of his abs.

Johnny wraps his arm around Daniel’s flank and pins his hands against his chest to keep them from wandering anywhere near his nether regions. "Why do I get the feeling that the balance wheel is gonna be less hazardous to my health than a whole day in bed with you, LaRusso."

#Lawrusso #Lawrusso drabbles and ficlets #t:my fic #happy birthday to me!#this is a gift everyone can enjoy

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skipps-writes-for-gojo-satoru · 3 years

Text

SFW ALPHABET A-Z

Gojo Satoru Edition 💙

note: I just want to thank everyone for making this blog hit 500+ followers. Never in my wildest dreams would have thought to have a writing blog and a one that is so supported and loved. I love everyone single of my followers and readers who took the time to read my content. English isn’t my first language so I struggle a lot when writing since I make a lot of typos and I barely have any writing skills. Even though I reread it to check I still manage to find some typos so I’m constantly editing, even my old posts. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have no idea how happy each comment or reblogs makes me, I love reading what you guys think. I will continue to work hard for you guys and the jkk community! Please look forward to future updates my lovelies! ❤

A= Admiration (How do they admire you? What is their thoughts about you? What is their reaction in meeting you for the first time? Do they instantly like you?)

Gojou loves staring at you and he's not afraid if he gets caught.

Even if you're doing chores or you're laughing with the first years. You could of just woken up with messy hair, drool dried on the corner of your mouth and he'll still think you're the most beautiful person in the world.

When he stares at you it's as if the world slows down and everyone goes in slow motion. He'll notice the twinkle in your eyes or how you suddenly shifted to your right. As he's in a trace where his hearts flutters at the sight of you.

His Six Eyes will notice even the tiniest detail about you.

Even in a crowded room his eyes will immediately try to find your form. You're the first person he seeks whenever and wherever.

He likes to boast about you to everyone, especially his students. You're his lover and he's proud to have you.

To him, you're his equal, his safe haven. You're the only person he can truly let his guard down with. You love him not because "he's the strongest shaman" but just as "Satoru" and that's something he thinks about that makes him feel all warm inside.

You're his everything, he wouldn't know what would he do if he ever loses you. If Gojou truly loves you he will fully commit to it.

You and Gojou didn't exactly start off on the right foot.

You thought he was too arrogant and annoying.

While he thought you were weak and boring.

You quickly proved that wrong, and his perception of you changed. He would often tease you and find opportunities to spar with you.

You slowly started to grow on each other from rivals to lovers.

He's still annoying though.

B= Bestie (Do they act like best friends while dating? How comfortable are they with you?)

Why absolutely! You guys are lovers at the same time bestfriends.

Gojou is very comfortable around you. He's pretty confident man already but when he's around you there's no breaks for this man.

He will do the wackiest and craziest things just see you laugh and smile.

You both tell each other everything, such as recent turn of events or even student gossip. He loves to gossip.

You can expect him to wake you up at 2 am just to go to McDonald's while blasting music from the car while you both sing on top of your lungs.

Of course there will be moments where both have arguments or disagreements but they don't last long. They get solved pretty easily.

"Wanna get icecream?"

"Fine, but you're playing."

Gojou can be quite obnoxious at times and you're not afraid to let him know. He doesn't listen and still annoy you anyways.

But now you should be used to his antics and don't take them too seriously.

There is no such thing as a boundary for this man.

He can literally become your safe haven during sad times or hell as he tickles you until you cry.

C= Cuddles (How often do they cuddle? How are they when they cuddle? What cuddle position do they like best? Are they the Big Spoon or Little Spoon?)

If he could, Gojou would always want to be cuddling with you. Whenever and wherever you both are.

He loves the feeling of having you in his arms or him in your arms. His home is where your arms are. It's one of the moments where his Infinity isn't activated.

He wrap his long limps around you and bring you as physically close as possible so he can nuzzle against you or press kisses to you.

Whenever he's in a cuddling mood or he's feeling stressed he'll come to find you and pull you to the nearest chair. He'll have you sit in his lap while he embraces you tightly. He won't go until he's satisfied too!

He usually prefers to be the bigger spoon, he likes the idea that you're safe within his arms. Sometimes he'll just stare at you while you sleep, smiling to himself as he drifts off to sleep.

If you're both in bed you must cuddle! It's a rule he made up.

He doesn't being the little spoon either, he loves the feeling of when you playing with hair. He truly feels comfortable and vulnerable within your arms.

He can't decide with position he likes best, he just likes the feeling of your body close to his.

D= Domestic (Are they willing to settle down with you? Are they willing to do chores? What do you two do at home?)

Gojou never thought he would settle down. That is until he met you!

With his busy and dangerous lifestyle, he thought he would spend the rest of his days alone.

Being with him, is a huge risk. The higher ups or the enemies would use you as a bargaining chip.

After lots of convincing, that you'll promise to be by his side forever. You'll have his heart now and forever.

Gojou when he's at home...he's lazy. He'll be munching on some snacks, lying on the sofa while you hang the laundry.

Somedays he's tired from work, so you let him be but if he really isn't doing anything. Some threats work really well on him.

"If you don't don't do the laundry, you're sleeping on the sofa tonight!"

"Then I'm off to do it!"

Having growing up with servants, he's not used to doing household chores.

But he will try, because he doesn't want you take take on the full workload. Teach him, he's a fast learner!

At home, within your arms is where he feels safest. Majority of the time you two would be in contact with each other one way or another.

You're watching tv? He's sitting you with his arm around your shoulder. If you're cooking, he'll come and unexpectedly hug you from behind. This man craves your touch.

Watching movies or television is something you both do very often, you'll both be snuggled up together, while Gojou throws commentary here and there.

Cooking or baking is another thing you both do. Majority of the time you both rarely get to spend together due to Gojou's work schedule. Who ever arrives home first will have to make dinner. However, you two are both at home you both help each other make a delicious dessert or meal. Nothing like eating a home cooked meal together.

Playing video games together is a must! You're his player number 2. He's very competitive so if he wins, it's non stop boasting but if he loses he demands an immediate rematch. Mario Kart or Super Smash Brothers is some the common ones you both play.

E= Endeavor (Are they supportive in you trying to do something? Will they help you reach for it?)

Gojou Satoru is known to be your literal hype man.

He will be very supportive of you and what you're trying to accomplish. As long as it's not something like becoming a murder. He's gonna have to do a double take on that.

If you're gonna become a piano, he'll have a grand piano delivered straight to your home. If you're gonna become an artist, he will buy you the best art supplies.

As they say "live your life to the fullest" and Gojou completely agrees with that statement.

If you're trying to learn something new, he will be encouraging you. There are times where he can be a little but don't take it to heart. He just wants you to improve and sugarcoating things isn't always the best way to improve.

If you're feeling down but you're trying to achieve, he'll be there to comfort you and motivate you.

"Things won't always go your way, but I promise I'll be there to cheer you on."

If you're trying to learn a new skill, he might have a go at it too. He's a fast learner but if he doesn't or can't do something, he'll just blame it on the fact that if he does it then he's gonna become perfect so he chooses not to. It's just to save his huge ego.

F= Fights (How often do you guys fight? Who apologizes first? How long will the fight last? What is the reason behind the fight?)

You guys argue pretty often but they're mostly about trival issues. Like Gojou forgot to take out the trash or who cooks today.

If you both do fight seriously. It would definitely have to do with "work". Because of Gojou's busy schedule you're not sure when will he be back home or when he will be gone. If you both have very different schedules it would definitely lead to some misunderstandings.

If you realize you did something wrong you'll apologize to him right away. While he spouts things like "I told you so!" but he's only teasing.

If he realizes he did something wrong it'll take him a while for him to admit it. Depending on the seriousness of the situation his apology will differ.

If it's something trivial, he'll just pepper you with kisses while says sorry a hundred times.

If it's serious, he'll fully embrace you and apologize, straight to the point no needless words.

Trivial fights don't last long but serious one may take time. Depending on who's wrong or right.

Gojou is a stubborn person so even if he's wrong it'll take him a while to admit it. Maybe days or a week but no longer than that. After all he can't resist not being around you.

G= Guard (Are they protective of you? How protective are they? Are they willing to risk themselves to save you?)

This depends whether you're a shaman or a civilian.

If you are a civilian, he will be very protective of you. You don't have the ability to see curses so who knows what or when can hurt you.

He'll take sure to put lots of talismans and barriers around your home for safety.

Gojou due to his busy work schedule won't always be home or be around you. During these days he's worried sick about you.

He'll be sure to message or call you whenever he can to check up on you.

If he truly senses you're in danger, no matter what he'll go to you instantly. After that happens he'll more frightened of losing you and might resort to leaving you.

Despite how much he loves you, you're life is more precious than him. He can't risk that by being around you.

If you're a shaman just like him, he won't be as protective over you. He'll understand and trust that you'll be able to defend yourself.

He'll make sure to spar with you so that you won't lose in touch in fighting.

Even though he knows you can take care of yourself, in his heart he still worries for you. So he may or may not pop up randomly during your missions and exorcise the curse immediately.

You may end up getting annoyed or mad at him because you may think he thinks you're weak but that's not the case. He just loves you and worries about you.

Whether you're a civilian or shaman, Gojou will 100% risk his life to save you. He's lost so many people, he can't afford lose you too.

If you're out in public, he'll be sure to be holding your hand or have an arm around your waist. He'll glare at anyone who looks at you funny through his sunglasses.

Gojou has a massive presence so good luck to anyone who tries to approach you. They gotta get through him first.

H= Healing (What is their reaction in you getting hurt? Do they get hurt often? Do they help you patching you up? Or do they not know how to patch you up, and tries their hardest?)

Gojou hates seeing you hurt in anyway. Even if it's a tiny wound. It's kinda like if you're hurt he's hurt too. That's his way of thinking.

If you get injured during a mission, you can bet Gojou will be all over you.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"For the hundred time, yes..."

Despite your assurance that are fine, he'll still insist to take you to Shoko just to be safe.

If it's a trivial wound like you accidentally cut yourself or you stubbed your toe. Gojou will be the one to take care of the wound. He does have basic knowledge on how to treat wounds.

If it's a severe wound, he'll instantly bring you to Shoko. He'll teleport all the way from Hokkaido to Tokyo if he has to.

He doesn't know how to use the Reverse Cursed Technique but at the moment when you're dying in his arms he will try his best to.

He will literally become your human shield if he knows things are dire.

If he sees an enemy wound you, well it's gonna be game over for the enemy. Instant oblivion.

It is known that Gojou has his Infinity activated at all times, so he doesn't ever get hurt whether from missions or trivial issues.

Very rare but when he does turn off his Infinity he can get hurt but it's because he let's it happen.

He still gets sick from time to time because that's something his Infinity can't protect him from.

I= Intimacy (How romantic are they? Do you two often go on dates?)

Gojou as we all know is very affectionate and romantic person.

He's very cheesy and likes to tease you just to see you blush.

He can't keep his hands off of you, he has to be touching you even just by lacing your fingers together. He also likes to stand near you often behind you or right beside you.

Gojou goes all over Japan for his missions and he makes sure to always bring a souvenir home for you whether it's a little trinket or something you'll like. Definitely will buy sweets, he'll share just a little though.

You'll often be surprised with deliveries of bouquets at work addressed to you but not written from who but you know who it is.

This man is extremely rich, so you ever have an eye on something, he'll secretly buy it for you.

When you're cold, he'll give you his jacket or hug you to keep you warm. If you're feeling hot under the sun, use this man as your personal shade. He doesn't mind.

It's rare for the both of you to have day offs at the same time so it's always something special to him.

He'll either take you out shopping or a cafe date.

He loves going around Tokyo with you to different places and secretly takes pictures of you when you're not looking.

If you don't feel like going anywhere he's fine with just cuddling you while watching a movie.

Gojou just has a sense for you if you're feeling down or stressed. He'll instantly know and would try to make you feel better.

He can cook your favorite meal or even give you a massage.

He's not shy to show the world how much he loves you, everyone in the Jujutsu society knows about you two.

J= Jealousy (How often do they get jealous? Do they get easily jealous? How will they react?)

Gojou doesn't get jealous easily. He trusts you and knows the things you do and won't do. However, on rare occasions it does happen but he won't directly voice it out.

"I'm the strongest most handsome shaman ever!" But behind that he still has insecurities. It usually depends on the person you're interacting with. If he sees you getting a little too close to someone, he'll step inーcausally stepping in between the two of you. A hand around your waist around strangers and a full on back hug around people he knows.

If a stranger tries to pick you up, he'll swoop right in towering the poor stranger. He knows he's attractive and he knows show to use it.

"Pay attention to me (Y/N), not Nanami!.

"Satoru, we're talking the recent sighting of a grade 1 cursed spirit."

Afterwards he'll just be very whiny and needy, he wants your full attention on him and him only!

K= Kissing (Do they like kissing you? Are they shy or confident in kissing you?)

Gojou Satoru loves all forms of affection. Kissing being one of them.

Gojou has had experience with kissing so he knows what he's doing. One moment he'll be kissing you sweetly then it turns into a full blown make out session.

He's not embarrassed about kissing you in public. Despite the Japanese culture of being conservative of PDA. He won't be making out with you in front of the entire crosswalk but he'll give you pecks or smooches that last a moment or two.

Whenever he leaves for work, he'll always ask for his goodbye kiss or when he's back home he'll be eagerly waiting for your kiss.

Whenever you both pass by each other whether at home or at school, he'll press a chaste kiss to you.

His tongue is divine, he definitely knows how to use his tongue. You can bet he knows how to tie a cherry into a knot using just his tongue.

You will always taste something sweet lingering on him as you kiss him.

He doesn't have a specific type of kiss he likes, he likes them all as long as they're with you. Forehead kisses, cheek kisses, eskimo kisses you name it!

He will definitely will to try out all forms of kisses with you.

L= Love (Who drops the L-word first? Would they rather say it or do it?)

Love is a complicated feeling, Gojou hasn't felt that before with any of his past relationships.

That was until he met you. That's when he realized that what the feeling was.

You were cuddling in bed together, face to face. There was no talking just silence as the two of you stare deeply into each other's eyes. Only the light of the moonlight peaking through the curtains illuminating the room.

Gojou stares into your eyes with a soft smile on his face as he gently lays his hand on your cheek.

Your eyes held the universe within them, the universe that is you and it's staring back at him with so much love and affection within them. He feels the warmth spread throughout his body. He whispers softly "I love you..." as his own eyes reflect yours.

You gasp with eyes widening, processing the words he spoke. You feel your eyes well up in tears, as your cheeks warm. You place your hand over his and whisper back "I love you too.." smiling brightly at him.

That was the moment when he first told you he loved you, it was so genuine and raw.

Afterwards he'll always voice out that he loves you but of course he shows it as well. He'll call you beautiful while pressing a kiss to your forehead.

M= Marriage (How do they propose to you? What’s their ideal wedding like? Where do you plan it?)

Gojou is a very spontaneous man, I can imagine him doing it during the most mundane and random moments. Such as after you're both walking home from a date or maybe it's late into the night while you're both cuddling.

Maybe moments where you're hurt or if he almost lost you.

"Marry me, (Y/N)..."

It's just a spur of the moment kind of thing, when he's the most vulnerable. When he realizes "ah, I want to spend the rest of my life with this person..."

Gojou is pretty flexible with the kind of wedding he wants. He doesn't really have a dream wedding.

The elders of his clan would definitely bug him for a Traditional one as it is customary.

However, if you want a Western style wedding instead he will definitely go for it.

Mostly likely, you both will have two weddings one traditional and western.

Money is different not an issue with this man. Say the word and you shall receive. It's definitely going to be extravagant.

Whether you want to or not he'll find a way to splurge his money.

If the elders are opposed to your marriage you'll both will just have a private wedding, inviting the people closest to you guys.

Not marrying you because someone said no is not an option for him.

N= Nicknames (What do they call you? Do they call you these in public as well? How often do they call you in nicknames?)

Gojou has a variety of nicknames for you!

Ranging from the typical baby, babe, sweetie, darling and honey.

Or something more sweet such as princess/prince, my love, my dearest.

And there's those really cringey ones such as sugarpie, cupcake, my strawberry cheesecake.

He will literally call you by any dessert name.

"Hey, my kikufuku!" Yup, that's you.

If you're shorter than him you can add shorty, short stuff or munchkin to the list.

When he uses them usually depends on the situation. If he's feeling really affectionate or needy he'll be using the really sweet nicknames.

Sometimes he'll even come up with the most ridiculous ones as much as it embarrasses you.

Usually he'll just call you using the common nicknames. He will only use your real name during serious situations.

He's not shy about proclaiming you as his chocolate cupcake. Not even in front of his students or colleagues.

"Are you referring to (L/N) sensei?" "Bingo!"

You've tried to beg him to stop but the man doesn't listen.

O= Open (How open are they with you? Are they willing to share their secrets and past with you? Do they trust you?)

Gojou despite being a man who loves to talk does not like talking about his private life or his past.

It's very personal information to him and he doesn't want the information to fall into the wrong hands.

If anyone asks about it he'll either ignore the question or answer it very vaguely.

You would have to be someone has spent years by his side to be to attain that level of trust with you.

There are some things in his past that isn't easy to talk about, even though it doesn't bother him now. If you ask he will tell you about it briefly.

If it's information not regarding his secrets or his past, he doesn't sharing those details. If you wanna about his mission or want to check his phone, he will let you. He has nothing to hide except the secret pictures he takes of you.

He in return trusts you as well, but he won't pry into things you don't want to talk about.

If you manage to gain his trust enough for him to reveal personal information about him, don't break it. If you do, you will never be able to gain it back.

P= PDA (Are they into PDA? Do they often do it? Their reaction if you hold their hands or kiss them in public.)

Gojou is into PDA but he doesn't flaunt it as often as you think. He won't be making out with you in the middle of the school hallway but he will press chaste kisses to you.

He's not afraid to hug you or hold your hand around the faculty or students.

He won't do something inappropriate in public he likes to keep that in private. Through sometimes he will because he likes seeing you embarrassed while you desperately ask him to stop. Trying not to gain the attention of the people around you.

He also likes seeing the reactions of other people when he does display affection towards you but mostly he does it to see your cute reactions.

If you initiate hand holding with him, he will definitely hold your hand back tightly. If you kiss him, he'll be surprised but then he's quick to tease you about it.

"Oya, is my cupcake getting bold～?"

If anyone looks at you two with disgust he will yell out "you got a problem?"

He's not shy to show the world he loves you.

Q= Quirk (Do they find your quirks adorable or odd? Do they tell you or not? Do they have a quirk of their own?)

Nothing escapes his keen eyesight. He'll notice and remember a lot of your quirks even the ones you're unconsciously doing.

He thinks its absolutely adorable, like how you furrow your eyebrows in concentration how you pout when you're deep in thought.

All these little quirks make you who you are and he adores them.

Gojou will tell you about them of course, even if you try to deny it. If you don't believe he'll try to take a picture to show you which ends up making you really embarrassed.

"I can't help it, I don't even know that I'm doing that..." you whisper with a blush on your face.

Gojou has a quirk of fiddling with his blindfold or his sunglasses if he's wearing them.

Definitely a fan of putting his hands in his jacket or hands while he stands or walks. He doesn't like the feeling of his hands being empty.

R= Reliable (Are they loyal? How loyal are they? Are they there for you when you need someone?)

Gojou is a very honest and down to earth kind of guy. Of course, loyalty is something he firmly commits to.

Cheating is something he won't resort to at all costs. No woman or man is tempting enough for him to be swayed.

We all know he is a good looking guy, he's bound to attract suitors anywhere but he'll turn them all down. He already has you, why would he need anyone else?

There are times where you might feel insecure or jealous but Gojou will always be there to assure you not to. He'll do his best to comfort you, until you're smiling again.

"You're the only one I need..."

During these times he'll even share his precious sweets with you. He'll feed you cake while hugging you from behind.

Have faith in him because whenever you need him, he'll make sure to be there.

S= Solace (How do they comfort you? Do they immediately notice you being sad?)

Gojou just has sense whenever you're feeling sad, even though you try your hardest to hide it.

He just sees through your facade. He won't ask if you're okay when he clearly knows you'll try to lie about it.

If you're trying to avoid him, he'll either pin you against the wall or pull you into his embrace.

He'll be silent as he takes off his blindfold to stare deep into your eyes, how could you lie when those eyes are looking straight at you.

He won't ask you about what's bothering you but he will always be there to comfort you.

Gojou would pull you into his lap on his expensive chair and cradle you like child as he gently caresses your hair.

Ligerning forehead kisses is also he does to comfort you.

Gojou would also bring his sweets stash and slowly feed you some while he hugs you from behind. If you want food, he'll be glad to cook up your favorite meal.

He knows a lot of cringy and cheesy jokes, in which ends up with him laughing at his own jokes. His laughter is contagious so wouldn't be able to hold back a smile after that.

T= Turn-off (What do they dislike in people? What is their turn-off?)

Gojou hates the old way of thinking he finds in elders especially the elders of his clan and the jujutsu society.

He doesn't like anything anything serious or boring. If you're too uptight, he'll find a way to break that.

Another thing he hates is when people do something behind his back or say something behind his back. If you have something to say, then say it straight it to him.

Routine is another thing he dislikes, he's very spontaneous and looks for the fun in things.

He dislikes vegetables and anything bitter. He's a lover of sweets afterall!

Prying too much into his personal life, as proud as he isーhe doesn't like going around talking much about his private life or his past.

U= Umbrageous (Do they easily get offended by what you said? How will they react when you get hurt by what they said?)

Now if you mean playful gets offended then the answer would be yes. If you're seriously trying to offend him, he won't. He's not the type to take things like that to heart.

Call him an idiot, a narcissist, he will playful hold his chest in pain and whine to you while he pouts.

He'll even tease you back if he feels like it.

"Sorry, did you say something～?"

Even though he doesn't take insults to heart, if you use his past against him, he will take offense to it. His past is something he doesn't want to bring up so if you or anyone brings it up. That changes things.

He tries to keep the optimism but he's only human with emotions so there will be times you could offend him.

If you managed to offend him, he'll be unusually quiet as he dwells on your words.

He won't resort to anger but that doesn't mean he won't at times. That's when he's firing insults back you, blinded by rage. He will regret it afterwards though.

V= Vision (What do they imagine their future? What is their dream? Do they want to spend it with you?)

If Gojou truly loves you, he'll definitely would want to spend the rest of his life with you by his side. Somewhere where he doesn't have to be on guard and would always welcome him with open arms.

Yet at the same time he is afraid of the dangers that come associated with him. If you're a civilian he'll try to distance himself away from you. He's afraid one day when he's not around, someone might come after you. His world is completely different from that of a normal person's afterall.

If you work in the same field as him. He'll definitely be more reluctant to push you away, because he knows you can handle yourself. It lessens his worries.

Still life as a shaman is still as dangerous, you're putting your lives at risk every time you go on a mission. The thought of losing you scares him to the very core.

Despite that he still loves you and if can't be with you he would like to associated with you someway maybe as acquaintances or friends.

He dreams of a world without cursed spirits, where he can live a peaceful life, settle down and start a family with you.

In a world crowded with darkness he dreams of a single ray of solace that is you.

Someone that will stay by his side no matter how difficult it will be.

W= Wacky (What is their reaction in you doing something crazy? Will they join you or stop you?)

Gojou Satoru is a man child, he does the most ridiculous of things like wearing a skirt of a highschool student.

If you're the type of person who's just as energetic and wild as him, it's going to be chaos.

You both will pull pranks on the students and faculty. Poor Ijichi being one of your primary targets.

If you're the type of person who's more on the serious side then he'll be shocked by your suggestion.

But of course he's willing to join in whatever plot you have.

Gojou already gives the higher ups a headache, if you're added to the mix it's going to end up being a massive headache.

He lost count of the amount of times he got scolded by Principal Yaga.

He can come up with the wildest ideas and sometimes you will have to become his break.

Principal Yaga specifically asked you to keep him in check after all.

X= Xtra (Random Headcannon about them)

Gojou Satoru has a driver's license. In fact he even owns several cars.

Of course, they're all the expensive ones because he thinks they look cool.

Does he use them? Not that often, when you literally have the ability to teleport or have Ijichi to drive you around.

As you expect he's a fast driver, you will literally be griping your seatbelt for dear life. It looks like he's gonna crash but he won't. He just likes to scare you.

Of course there's a stash of candy and extra pairs of sunglasses in the glovebox.

Gojou is surprisingly a great cook. You would think being raised with servants he wouldn't know how to cook but he does.

He studies the recipe very carefully and cooks. It's as if he has a natural talent for cooking.

At first, you were pretty skeptical of his cooking but once you had of bite of his dish. You could feel the literal flavors explode on your tongue.

When it's his turn for him to cook, expect him to be wearing a cute apron while blasting music from his speaker.

He'll be singing and dancing in the kitchen.

Hug him from behind while he cooks and he'll melt right then and there. Trying to hide a blush from you.

Y= Yearning (Do they long for you? Will they find themselves missing you while you’re away? If so, how will they cope with it?)

Even though you haven't seen each other for a day he terribly miss you. Your just gives him warm and when you're not there he feels cold.

He goes on missions very often and they can last days or even weeks depending on the case. He'll try to update you as much as he can on when he could come home.

Even when he's in the middle of fighting cursed spirits, he'll find his mind wondering towards you.

If he's away from you, you'll be getting calls and texts from him quite frequently. He'll make sure to always greet you good morning or good night and ask how you are.

He'll always ask if you've eaten or not and asks you to send a picture of your meal to prove it to him. He needs to know you're being well fed.

If you think he talks too much he texts just as much. He'll even take random selfies of himself or something interesting he wants you to see.

If you send him a selfie or video he'll save that so fast and save that to his folder. So he can look through them whenever he misses you.

If it's a long mission, he might pack one of your shirts which has your scent so he could take a whiff to calm himself or cuddle as he sleeps.

After a mission if he's not tired yet, he'll video call you every now and then.

He'll try to come back as fast as possible because he doesn't feel complete without your presence.

Z= Zzz (Do they fall asleep easily? Do they move around while sleeping? What sleeping position do they like best?)

If we are talking about the past Gojou, maybe around his youth then no. He had difficulty sleeping because sleeping meant he's vulnerable to attacks.

This is why relies mostly on sweets to stimulate his brain because there are days where he can't sleep at all. His powers drain a lot of energy to keep up.

Once he could run Infinity automatically, he doesn't have any trouble sleeping at all. In fact, he passes out instantly once his head hits the pillow.

The man works hard and goes on tons of missions so of course he's bound to be tired when he gets home.

Gojou Satoru is 190 cm tall so of course he has a large king sized bed at home. He likes having a lot of space but he tends to move around a lot unconsciously.

There have been times where he has fallen off the bed as well.

If you're sleeping with him and want to prevent him from taking all the bed space, you both cuddle that way his limbs are locked on you.

His likes to sleep laying on his back while you lay on your chest or embracing you from behind as you both sleep on your sides.

It's very rare from him to snore but that doesn't mean he doesn't and when he does, it's loud.

However sleeping with him has it's benefits, if you wake up before him you'll be graced by the most angelic view. As he breathes softy while his long white eye lashes remain closed.

If he does wake up you will also be graced by his morning voice which is divine.

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #gojou satoru #gojou satoru x reader #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x you #jujutsu kaisen gojo #sfw alphabet gojo satoru #jjk gojo #jjk imagines #gojo satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #500 followers event #skipps writes

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trulyhumblenarcissist · 3 years

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Abourt Rei Himura and BNHA Chapter 301

Now that I've read the official release of chapter 301 I can finally try to gather my thoughts. I think this time the particular rendition of dialogues and inflections provided by Caleb Cook is more crisp and clear than usual, especially in throwing "shade" upon Endeavor as a father figure. But let's do things in order...

Title: THE WRONG WAY TO PUT OUT A FIRE - a simple, but stark message that doesn't leave space for ambiguity. There was a fire, an imminent tragedy that could and should have been avoided, but whoever tried to fix it, did it all wrong and now we have to deal with a huge arson.

CARLESS HANDLING OF FIRE, on the other hand, doesn't quite cut it for me, because it seems like everything was caused by a foolish mistake. "I was carless and now I'm in a pinch"- type of situation, while it's perfectly clear that Endeavor and Rei decided purposefully which "strategy" to use with Touya. A BAD one to say it lightly. Rei's contribution and complicity is debatable, of course, and I'll touch on this later.

Let me get this clear though: I'm not trying in any way to critique the hard work of unofficial translators. I can't say anything relevant because I'm not a translator in the first place (I can barely understand English and my native language on a good day) and also because I am so grateful for everything they do in order to give us really good material FREE OF CHARGE basically a second after the release in Japan. I'm just interested about the different shades of subtext we can catch if we read the story through multiple filters. Every translation is unique because it carries the personal spin of the author even if the bias should be inexistent or ideally undetectable...

However, back to the chapter

REI'S CAGE

The first scene opens on a luxurious classic Japanese villa, with Enji, Rei and her parents discussing the motivation behind Enji's proposal. Or at least we initially think that's what's going on... Because in reality Rei's family couldn't care less about the motivation. Everything these people see is a wealthy, famous guy the next number one hero ready to take their daughter in marriage. I guess the Himuras are pretty broke, thight on cash, their old prestige is definitely gone and all they can do to save themselves from shame and poverty is "to sell" their only remaining asset.

During the whole ordeal, Rei is standing still, silent, cold as ice. She knows she doesn't really have a choice. How mortifying and sad is this? An adult, capable woman has no agency whatsoever, she is used again and again and she stoically accepts this treatment from every single dominant figure in her life until she can't be stoic anymore. I really hope Horikoshi's going to give her a much more proactive role in saving her family and it seems the narrative wants us to expect this type of character development.

I'd like to point out 2 panels in particular:

First one

In this scene the Todorokis are back from their trip to the doc, who clearly said they shouldn't try to conceive a child with a perfect quirk mix because it is dangerous (and morally questionable too). Rei understands this fact and tries to dissuade Enji, but he doesn't listen, because he's projecting all his pent-up resentment and frustration onto Touya. He knows how it feels to crush against an unbreakable wall, since he can't surpass All might and his son can't too. He had to learn this truth the hard way, so Touya needs to do the same. Enji is purposefully throwing upon his son years of failures, self consciousness and despair, just because the boy has to get it into his thick skull that he is a dud, just like his father. This is not a hopeless dad making a mistake bona fide, this is a broken man trying to destroy his self reflection by proxy, annihilating everything Touya is, swiping the kid's identity under the rug. He describes his son's dreams and sadness as something birthed from stubbornness. He is auto-convincing himself however (because Endeavor is not stupid). A little bit later he's basically saying: "Touya let's play make believe! We can go on like everything I had engulfed in your psyche never existed, you're a failed attempt so you don't exist. Your needs and wants are silly and useless, nothing worth dealing with now that I can't make you my prodigy. Why don't you go play with the other failures so that I don't have to look at myself while taking actually care of you. I don't want to see you, because it's too painful, because you're a remainder of my own inadequacy."

Note: If you want to read an incredibly well done analysis about Endeavor's motives and psyche, you can get it on @thyandrawrites , she's dwelt on everything extensively and way better than me.

I really want to talk about Rei though. In the panel I showed above, her expression is a bit tricky to analyse. At first she is very vocal about her position. She doesn't want to put Touya through useless suffering, especially since they have a scientific reason not to. They have no guarantee of success with other children, besides, they could possibly have to deal with other health related issues. However, all it takes to convince her in the end is Enji's half assed attempt at the "It's for Touya's sake" shtick. Is it really? Why doesn't she question her husband anymore?

Well... I think before Natsuo, she was probably hoping Touya would let go "naturally", with time and growth, maybe by taking interest in his other siblings. Rei said she wanted to have more children because in her mind they would have supported and loved each other. Maybe she was naive enough to think that a big family full of kids few years apart from each other was all Touya needed to distract himself from his purposes... BUT and here is the point I want to get across: She was deluding herself too, much like Enji. The ugly truth, in my opinion, is that Rei is a person prone to protect herself by going with everything other people want, especially if said people are capable of hurting her. Yes, she was hurt time and time again, but what would have happened if she really tried to stop Enji?

What I am trying to say is that Rei is the kind of person who endures to survive. She holds a "captive" mentality in which, by indulging her captor's desires, she can continue living with less possibile damage. If I stay still and silent, if I don't make a scene, I can go on, I can hold onto the few things I have that actually make me happy.

Let's think about it... Enji was so obsessed with his psychotic, power-hungry quest that he would have probably disown Rei. She would have been thrown away for a more compliant woman with an ice quirk, or something similar, this resulting in her probably losing everything, the respect and love of her family (the Himuras) and also her own children. Because we know Endeavor can definitely hold a grudge and is vendicative.

So, clarifying, Rei doesn't put up a fight because she is scared for herself in a way... She is scared to be hurt in the worst possible way (by losing her little bit of serenity), so her strategy is to endure and to keep up a facade of control and purpose.

Rei, ironically just like Touya and other characters in mha, doesn't really get what unconditional love is. Her family loves her until she can be useful to the Himura name and status, her husband loves her for her quirk. Her children, however, love her for who she is and she wants to stay with them... Only to be forced to leave them later anyway.

The few times Rei actually smiles are when she is with her babies. She is a deeply loving mother in her core, but her declining mental health makes her a very lacking caregiver.

This panel, in my opinion, shows the point of no return for Rei. She can't keep the glacial facade forever...

After Natsuo's turn to be deemed a failure, Endeavor is crazier than ever, because All Might is as popular and loved as ever and he hasn't make any progress into his eugenetic games. The last two images of Rei are very telling. She is exhausted, but she knows what her husband wants from her this time too. She looks like a lifeless doll and honestly I can easily see Shouto's conception as... Non consensual and I will stop here.

Then Shouto is born, the last, perfect specimen... And Rei isn't doing much for Touya, we can see she's apparently blind towards her eldest son's distress already after Natsuo's birth... But why?

Because she is actively avoiding to face the Touya's problems too.

If Touya is still suffering, is still feeling stressed and worthless, then everything Rei has endured, everything she pretended not to feel for the sake of her family has been completely useless. What Rei cannot look at is her own parental failure, is the concrete proof that while protecting herself and her peace she did not protect her children too, because the two interests were never really aligned, even if she really believed so. She never had a functional family to preserve in the first place and everything she accepted to do was all for the sake of a false sense of belonging.

However is too easy to say she should've rebelled against Enji and dumped his sorry ass. Abuse traps you and your abuser too in a cage tricky to escape.

What I imagine will happen next chapter is one of two things:

Enji stops Touya by using brute force, probably also saying something really scarring to reinforce the notion that Shouto is the only child he cares about.

Rei stops Touya by using her quirk. This act could be considered by Touya another confirmation that even his mother actually does something by her own accord only when Shouto's safety is at risk

Necessary conclusions

I don't blame Rei for her actions too much. She is a victim turned abuser by circumstances, but more importantly she's actually taken mesures to prevent herself from hurting her children again. She's trying to heal for her family's sake, really this time. Ten years spent dealing with guilt and having actual therapy seem a good plan to me. And now she's the one ready to snap Enji back to reality.

Enji, on the other hand, is trying too. It's too little too late, but if he stops avoiding reality and hardly works on understanding his family's point of view I don't think he is completely unredeemable. I don't see him surviving his last confrontation with Touya, thought... But I could be totally wrong.

Obviously everything I've said it's my personal analysis on Rei's character, as I interpret her actions and words, so feel free to contradict me and/or to add anything you might see fit.

#bnha301 #bnha meta #mha #my hero academia #todoroki enji #endevor #todoroki rei #rei himura #todoroki family #tw abuse

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caesthetix · 3 years

Text

KIDS IN LOVE — Pt. 3 Old Friend

↪Porco Galliard mini-series

↪content; canon universe, description of violence, unrequited love, admiring from afar, season 4 spoiler, manga spoiler 127

"Hoi, (Y/n)! Can you help me with this stew?!" Hange shouted even though you were just a few metres away from them. "I know I said I will cook today, but I think something is missing!" You could only shake your head in amusement before plucking some rosemary and edible mushrooms that you could find.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, Hange." You answered with the same enthusiasm, yet a lot calmer tone compared to the rowdy brunette. Someone from the survey corps assisted you in your task, searching for some oyster mushrooms or morels that grew nearby. The name was Connie, if you were not mistaken.

"You know, I used to do this with my best friend." He spoke up, it was the first time he tried to initiate a conversation with you. "She was a good hunter, her aiming was like something out of this world, and she knew a lot of things about woods too." He looked so excited as he shared a piece of his life, but you could hear the melancholy lingering there in his voice.

In this endless war between Marley and Paradis, you wondered how many people lost their loved ones. Everyone was fighting their own battle inside their heart, setting aside all the grief so they could continue to devote their heart to the war. And a small moment shared like this was the only normal thing that could be found.

"She seemed lovely." You answered with a gentle smile on your face, putting the mushrooms to the basket.

"Oh, she is not." He snorted as he dismissed the compliment. "She is anything but lovely. A prankster, gluttonous, she only had one goal in her life and that was to reclaim our freedom so she could do nothing but eat."

You chuckled at that, even letting out a snort too at how he grumbled under his breath.

"Well, at least she seemed fun to be around with." He didn't argue with you on that and shared with you a few memories that he had with her. How she ate a warm potato in front of the Cadet Corps instructor, even giving the old man half of it, not caring that everyone looked at her with horror.

You learned a lot with just a simple story that he shared with you. Connie could be a prankster, somewhat reckless too, yet he would do anything to protect his friends. The two of you spent time together plucking mushrooms and sharing past lives, holding on to the new comfort that was found before getting back to duty.

"By the way, I think I remember where I heard your name before." He grabbed the basket in your hand as he walked beside you to the camp. "Niccolo, the other chef from Marley was close with my best friend, and he told us that he had a fellow chef who could cook even better than him."

"You know Niccolo?" You whipped your head to face him, ignoring the fact that your friend just praised you so easily. You couldn't contain your excitement, someone from Paradis knew your friend after all.

"Yes, I could say we are pretty close. Since Sasha, that gluttonous best friend of mine, kinda had a thing with him." He wiggled his eyebrows playfully, making you chuckle in an instant knowing the implication. Now you wanted to meet her for real, it would be lovely to see your friend being flustered over a woman.

As the laugh between you died down, silence followed you once again, but it was not one that made you want to excuse yourself out from. He started to loosen up around you, and it was good to know that at least some of them didn't set a deadly eye upon you like how it used to.

"I will take it from here." You snatched back the basket from his hand before rushing ahead to Hange, making him bewildered with how sudden it was. You didn't stop your pace, but you turned for a while to wave at him. "See you later, Connie! I will cook tasty food for all of you!"

The scout was taken aback by your words just now. Knowing that someone who days ago was his enemy by nation, now would cook for them was something that even he couldn't believe. He didn't know what drives you to fight, you mentioned that it was freedom, but somehow he felt that it was a little more than that.

But it didn't matter what it was anymore, he was happy to know you now.

"I wish you could meet her, Sasha."

〄

You were not really surprised that something like this would happen. One second everyone was eating stew together, another Jean was tackling Reiner to the ground for telling the truth about something that happened a few years ago when he was here. There was so much rage inside Jean's eyes, something that you never saw from him since he always seemed to be the calmest among all.

Well, you only knew him for a few days, of course, you wouldn't know much about the rest of them.

You flinched when you saw Reiner getting beaten up, his face was now covered with his own blood. It was no secret that he could heal himself, but anger like this was dangerous to be kept alive. Everyone started to get along, this was not something that you wanted to see, because now, it felt like a drawback on both sides.

You couldn't take the shouting anymore, you couldn't bear to see two people that were supposed to be friends like this because of these circumstances. From the corner of your eyes, you saw how Gabi wanted to throw herself on top of Reiner.

But you stopped her, pushing her petite body out of the way before replacing her place.

"Jean!"

You gripped Reiner's shoulders so tight as you felt Jean's feet kicking your ribcage. Tears build up in your eyes, either it was from the guilt of wanting freedom by killing the Eldian in Paradis or because of the pain, you didn't know anymore.

This was too much for you, violence. Porco warned you that someday you would see more than just someone hurting an enemy. In war, even friends could turn into a foe. You let Gabi do the talking, yet all she said was left unanswered as Jean wriggled himself free and turned around.

"Hey, I think we should do something for you." You heard Annie's soft voice as she put her hand on your back. This gesture was enough to make you lift your face, teary eyes staring back to the blue orbs. "It hit right on your rib cage, right? We need to check if it is broken or something."

Gritting your teeth, you slowly moved your body to sit. Everyone was watching you carefully, even the rest of the scouts were looking at you with worry in their eyes. You tried to keep the expression on your face as neutral as possible, didn't want to show them that it hurts.

"I am fine, Annie. You should take care of Reiner." You answered her with a monotonous voice, blinking back the tears that were threatening to spill before. "It was nothing that I couldn't handle."

Annie didn't look convinced at your response, she narrowed her eyes a little, observing your face who was now averting her gaze by looking down.

"You are not a titan shifter, you can't heal yourself." She stated, not wanting to back down knowing how stubborn you could be. "You didn't grow to be a warrior or a soldier, you are just a chef."

"I am not weak!" You knew that she didn't mean any harm by saying that. "And I am not a kid either!" But that didn't mean it hurt any less.

"Hey, I didn't say that you are weak, and no one said that you are a kid—"

"Porco did!"

You balled your hand into a fist, sucking a deep breath as you wanted to keep your emotion in check. Annie was taken aback by your sudden outburst, even mentioning the dead comrade. Letting out a long sigh, you relaxed your hand.

"Porco always said that, Annie." You continued, still looking down as you felt so vulnerable. "And I am tired. I want to be stronger so I can keep on living, so I could reach my freedom." Then you lifted your head, now finally looked at her. "Our freedom." Something that your old friend couldn't get to see in this world.

You gave her a small smile before looking down to see Reiner, feeling relieved that he started to let out some steam, notifying that he had started to heal. Suddenly, you felt something pushing at your back, making you yelp as you didn't expect someone trying to put pressure on your body.

"Becoming stronger doesn't mean you neglect any pain that you felt." You widened your eyes as you saw Pieck, who was now in titan form, now sitting beside you. "You need to take care of your body, keeping your mind and emotions in check, don't be reckless and let Annie take a look at your rib cage."

You frowned at this, feeling like a little kid being scolded by her parents. Pieck could always change your heart despite some hurtful truth that she always spouted. She pushed you once again with her mouth so now you stumbled on Annie's arms.

Annie let out a small chuckle when she saw the pout on your face. She hoisted you up slowly, making sure that the gesture didn't hurt you more. You were still reluctant at first, but you knew better than to argue in front of them. She grabbed your arm and guided you further to check you up, and as you walked, you could see from the corner of your eyes how the scouts were all worried about you.

"Come on, soldier, let me see how your wound is." Annie pulled you back from your thought, her eyes fixated forward. Even if she was always detached when you were a kid, she tends to have a soft spot for fellow warriors and close friends.

"Alright." You answered softly, letting her take care of you. "Thank you, Annie."

"It's nothing." She shrugged her shoulders, and you were grateful that you had comrades who could get through your stubborn head. "After all, if Porco was here and you neglected the care, he would be the one who threw a tantrum at us for not convincing you better."

"Annie, not cool!"

〄

The sun seemed to be so cruel today, the sweats on your forehead didn't seem to stop as you sat on the wooden cart. On your left was Falco, he seemed to cling into you so much as Gabi did the same on your right, though careful not to put much pressure on your rib cage where you took Jean's hit last night.

You thanked God that it turned out to be nothing. There were some bruises on your skin, but your bones remained intact. Though sometimes you would still winch as the cart passed some bumps on the road.

"Miss (L/n), how are you feeling?" Falco asked softly, his big hazel eyes staring at you. You blinked, somehow seeing his big brother inside those beautiful orbs. He was caring, an optimist, no wonder Colt would sacrifice his life if that meant this little kid would not feel abandoned.

"Ah, it's nothing to worry about, Falco." You raised your arm that wrapped around his shoulder before patting his head. "It was just a scratch." Your orbs eyeing the man across you, Jean, who now had his head hanging low. You didn't want to worry anyone, and a little bruise was something that you could handle.

He nodded, seeming satisfied with your answer, and you thanked God once again that they were not too pushy like Annie and Pieck. His little fingers grasping on your green cloak, somehow didn't want to let it go.

The cart was filled with silence, and if only the sun was not cruel today, you bet that those two kids would be asleep in no time.

"Miss," Falco spoke up once again, earning a single hum from you, telling him to continue. "I don't mean to bring this up now. But," He hesitated, a look of conflict written all over his face. "I-I just want to say thank you."

"What for, dear?" You locked your gaze on him, now confused since you felt like you haven't done a lot in his life.

"For everything!" He exclaimed. "For making that tasty stew last night, for giving us warrior candidates free dessert when we passed by the restaurant, for telling us it's okay to be just a kid sometimes." Ah, you remembered that day. "And most of all," He trailed off before clearing his throat. "Thank you for making my brother happy."

Your lips parted, eyes never left his face as he gave you a beautiful smile. You could feel Reiner glanced at you with a knowing look, while Annie just raised one of her eyebrows in confusion. You felt like you stopped breathing as you processed the information, your mind suddenly played some of the memories that you had with the older Grice.

His never-ending smile when the kids were around, his serious expression that occurred when the talk of war was brought up, his gentle gaze that loved to settle on you —

"What are you looking at?"

You couldn't help but call him out as he stared in your direction. It was not like you were irritated, but more like you afraid his gaze would affect you in any kind of way. Though it seemed like your question just in from one ear and out from the other. "Colt, stop it, I swear."

"What?" He protested, a smile that tugged on his lips showing you that he knew you were not angry at him. "Is that so wrong to look at you?" So he did look at you.

"Well, I am here just to bake them some cake. Shouldn't you keep watch of them? What if they were missing?"

The warrior candidates; Gabi, Falco, Udo, Zofia, and Colt himself, were visiting your workplace before continuing their journey to the headquarters. They still had an hour before a meeting with the warriors, and Udo was begging for a free dessert that he would get if they stopped by your place.

While waiting for the cake to be done, the kids were running around the huge restaurant where you mainly served the Marley Military and the Warrior Unit. They were off the instant you told them to explore, saying that they should enjoy their time before getting drilled by the Commander.

You expected the big brother to follow them, but he ended up just sitting on one of the stools near the kitchen island, deciding to accompany you instead. When you prepared the ingredients and baked, you could feel his hazel eyes lingered on your form.

"They wouldn't like it if I go with them." He scoffed, feeling a little bit hurt. "Falco would shout at me to be with you instead, saying I am such a coward for—" He cleared his throat then as he realised his mistake. "Nevermind, those kids just didn't like to be accompanied by me all the time after all."

"Hm, that's an acceptable excuse." You chuckled softly, your words making him blush a deep shade of red at your accusation.

"I am not lying! Falco really said—"

"Calm down, Colt." You walked towards him and patted his shoulder lightly. "I am just messing with you, you know I trust you with anything." A gentle smile appeared on your lips as you gazed at him, and you could feel him stiffening in an instance.

Remembering something, you retracted your hand, somehow feeling guilty. You cast your gaze down as you recalled what Porco said about him a few nights before, something about how the older Grice took a liking to you. And no, not in a platonic way.

"You know, you don't have to think about it," Colt whispered, enough for you to hear. "I know who you set your eyes on, and I never expected you to look at me like that." He said it carefully, and you wondered how come he understood what you were feeling.

"But, Colt—"

"There was nothing for you to worry about." He chuckled, though you could hear a hint of sadness lingering there. "I never expected to have this kind of feeling too. But I am alright with that, I am grateful that when I feel like this, it was with you."

He looked up, giving you his signature smile. However, you knew this time it didn't reach his eyes, and you didn't dare to say anything. "I understand my place, (Y/n)." He continued, now reaching out his hand to ruffle your hair, the gesture felt so bittersweet yet comforting as it lingered even after he withdrew his hand.

"I am happy enough to have met you."

"It was nothing," You swallowed a huge lump, letting the tears blinding your vision as you ruffled the light blonde hair that belonged to Falco, doing the same thing that Colt always did to you to give comfort. "It was nothing."

↪Back to Wall Maria

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#porco #porco galliard #porco galliard x reader #porco galliard imagine #porco galliard scenario #porco galliard x you #aot x reader #aot imagines #aot x y/n #aot angst #aot #snk x reader #snk imagines #snk season 4 #snk

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bluecloudious · 3 years

Text

Here's a little rant about Kits and Zanaz canon, cause I have quite a few thoughts that I dunno what else to do with and my head was aching really bad (and I wanted to get smth done), so I decided to share some of the ones that I've been debating for a while (It's pretty long, be warned):

The TL;DR is just the thought names, I guess.

Thought nr 1: They are 100 percent a couple, even in the first comic I posted of them.

I've been thinking about this a lot, whether they were just best friends who had crushes on one another, or if they were just straight up a thing and, yeah. They're just a couple and have been for a while. The written story is now the AU where Zani chickened out of confessing his feelings for so long that he finally was given a deadline. Comics are the canon and in that canon, they got together shortly after becoming agents. Zani occasionally flirts with other people, but that's just kinda a part of his personality and Kits has grown used to it. Their shipname is Kitzan.

Thought nr 2: Kits has no self-confidence.

In the meeting comic I tried to make it a bit noticeable how unhappy he is with himself, but even after transitioning, that fact has only slightly changed. He is his preferred gender now, but he still isn't confident at all about his looks, his voice or what he says, despite how much Zanaz tries to convince him that he's fine. The only thing Zanaz has managed to stop Kits from doing is actually being self-destructive aka Kits starved himself for a while (also hinted at in the comic). That's why he's way chunkier now- cause his body stopped trusting him and gained fat afterwards. All of this isn't really visible or audible in any of the comics, because Kits isn't vocal about it at all. Zanaz is the only person who really even knows it/cares about it. It's also the base for his mostly detail-less design compared to Zani- he's trying not to stick out.

Thought nr 3: They both have a body count

Yeah, they've both killed before, which, for the world they live in, isn't really surprising. It was all in self-defence, don't worry. The amount of rogue agents and grunts that decide to deviate in a violent way is a pretty big percent, so they've had to encounter quite a few of them. Zanaz' preferred weapon is of course the handgun/glock and is the more experienced/lethal of the two. Kits on the other hand is more proficient with knives, his main weapon being a shaving knife he got from Zani. He hasn't had to use it much, but the few times he has, we're pretty desperate. Zanaz also has a body count in the other sense too, but you could probably tell that much already.

Thought nr 4: I still do not think they'll have a happy ending

Sorry, but the happy ending Kits and Zanaz I drew are just a part of an AU as well. There is no malicious reason for why I think they'll die. They just happen to get the short end of the stick, just like most members of the A.A.H.W. We are talking about an agency that has at least three(four if you count that one incident with 2bdamned) very proficient people constantly killing staff. There are so many deaths that they have to use clones, for pete's sake! The amount of time they've already managed to be alive for is quite impressive (I imagine about 3 years).

Thought nr 5: Zanaz is even more protective of his inner feelings than Kits is

Even though Zanaz is very blunt and honest about most things, even some considered private info to most, he is not actually open about how he feels. He hides his negative emotions as much as he possibly can, even from Kits. (This was briefly explored in the written story, also.) The only reason Kits knows this, is because he's caught Zani crying to himself in less visited areas of their main facility, once or twice. Even then he wouldn't say what's wrong, that's how stubborn he is. All Kits could really do when this happened, was hug him and pat his head.

Fun facts that I didn't know how to categorize:

Zanaz is a dog person and Kits is a cat person. They combine to become bird people. (Yes, this is my excuse to draw dog boy Zani at some point.)

Zanaz' and Kits' personalities are based off myself. Of course in an amplified way, but yeah, I relate to them a lot. (Others have claimed to relate as well, which is most pleasant.)

They get their shade colors from RGB. Regular agents have red, Zanaz has green and Kits has blue.

I occasionally draw them during my free time! Most of those pictures I will not be posting to Tumblr, however. Some cause they're just kinda sketches that I don't really see a point in posting and others are just straight up not Tumblr appropriate.

Kits and Zanaz had not dated anyone before each other. Kits cause of insecurity and Zanaz because he didn't want any commitment. They are still very loyal to each other, tho.

The main song I listen to whenever I draw Zanaz is Left Boy- Security Check. Kits doesn't have a song that I listen to and get his vibe, but I am still looking.

Bit of a bonus tangent too:

I'm sorry that most of these are negative. The funni bois are, ya know, funny, and I tend not to make media about them that isn't funny, but I wanted to blabber about how I think they are when not performing a punchline.

When I design characters, I never only think about the positive personality traits. I tend to instead think about what the negatives are, so I can figure out, how they handle it. How they cope and how they've grown from their negative experiences/emotions enchants me.

I've said this before, Kits and Zanaz got created on a whim, basically unintentionally. But, I grew attached to the two idiot agents with different color shades. Thus, I wanted to know more about them.

I think, by now, I've figured them out for the most part. (Thankfully I don't have to give them any family or nothing, cause they're both clones.)

Also, their color scheme is final. If you've noticed, they're shades have changed shade over time. Zanaz' got brighter, while Kits' got darker. The suit color is a random shade every time, cause I just choose a dark shade of gray via slider. Hair color hasn't changed at all, as far as I know. Only Good Ending Zani has darker hair, cause he had it colored.

And, speaking of the Good Ending AU, I don't think I know what to do with the concept. I try to think more into it, but my brain blanks. If anyone wants to draw or write about it, I would be completely fine with it. Might even consider it canon, if none of it conflicts with the established canon. Good Ending AU takes place in the far future, after all.

But, yeah, I think that's it. I'm kinda honestly surprised if anyone actually reads all of this, lol. I hope you found my long-ass tangent about my two silly gay MadCom OCs interesting :)))

#Madness Combat #OC #Info #IT IS VERY LONG #most of it isn't funny haha #KitZan

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kaito-is-baby · 3 years

Text

Shoto Todoroki x Reader

A little bit of help

Okay, hiii~ so... I really don't know what this is, I finished boku no hero and I started to read the manga ASAP and now I just want to give some love to my baby todoroki but this is more like... I was trying to set the ambient for my idea of a Midoriya x "useless" reader scenario but then my love for Shoto took over me and it ended up being about him so... I will write that one someday

Warnings: none, it takes place on season 1 and has no angst. Also gender neutral reader (I think...)

The first class with the great All Might had ended and you felt... stupid.

Every single one of your teammates had incredible abilities at fighting

And there you were, with a sweet gas making them fall asleep, but only if you touched them

It could have been good if they weren't much better, there was no way to touch them.

You couldn't even find the invisible girl

And everytime you tried to approach the half an half haired boy a wall of ice would appear between the two of you

No matter how fast you ran or how hard you tried you felt absolutely useless

Your teammate had to carry you all the fight and you were just a burden for your team, you knew it

You knew you were useless since the very beginning. You had been working with your grandma, recovery girl, in the school nursery this last year and you loved it, don't get me wrong

But seeing all those brave kids getting into fights to save the world, thinking about yourself saving people that way... yeah, grandma had told you lots of times that your quirk did also save people but you weren't her, your quirk wasn't really useful at healing either. Yes you could put on a sweet dream someone who was in pain and that same fluid that made them dream could heal them but it couldn't save a life, maybe an arm but not a life

You wanted to go to the battle and rescue the civilians, you wanted to calm them and cure them when they needed it the most

So you decided to take the joining exam for the UA

You still couldn't understand how you made it through, you wanted to believe that even if your gas did not affect the artificial villains your strength sure did but it was... quite difficult to believe

And your only answer was that your cute little grandma had convinced then to let you join

Of course she claims they let you in because how you threw yourself to heal every single one of the soon to be heroes on the field even altough they were your rivals

But what they wanted was for you to beat the villains not to have a great teamwork and a sweet heart oh baby you should listen to your grandma

You tried to shake that thought of your brain and enjoy your very first day as an student on the UA

You failed

"Let's use our quirks to make our phisical abilities greater" yeah, that didn't work out

Luckily for you that thing about expelling the worst calificated was a lie because you were sure that either Midoriya or you were going back home forever that day

'Things can go better tomorrow' you think but yet again you fail in your prediction

After the disastrous fight on All Might's class you had obviously stated to all of your classmates and teachers that you were, in fact, useless

But then again, you already knew you were useless and yet chose to try and become a hero

And your mind could have thought of something better, maybe ask Aizawa for some help or a nicer classmate

But your feet moved towards Todoroki

If you try to give it a rational explanation you can actually find it. He was, alongside with Bakugo, the strongest one of the class and, being honest, you were not brave enough to get even near that angry boy

So yeah... you could say you chose to speak to him because he was the best prepared but deep inside you, you knew well it was the 15 years old teenage that you, even if you deny to accept, actually were. A handsome tall boy who fitted quite well on your type, and to be honest, everyone's, had fight against you, being pretty close, trying to touch any part of his body, avoiding his attacks and trying to prevent what he was going to do... maybe it had made you develope a little crush, but it was for sure little!

So you took the opportunity when you had it right in front your eyes

He approached you just after your fight

"I hitted you with that last wall of ice right?"

Yes, yes he did, you weren't fast enought to avoid the hit but you were stubborn enough to be too close to him even although you knew he would make an ice panel

Maybe in a desperate intent, you tried to make him step back and don't throw his attack at you directly

That failed

And now you had a little hurting mark on your right leg and your right arm

But you weren't angry, you both did what you had to do to get good grades, this was a friendly competition after all

"Yes but-"

"I'm sorry I may have been too tough for a first class fight" you could tell by his face this wasn't the apologies of someone who is genuinely sorry but of someone who knows it's polite to apologise after it

"it's nothing, really, you were fighting for that 10 and so was I, it's cool"

He nodded and turned his back

"Wait! Todoroki... could I ask you... a favour? Please" your checks- No! Your whole face- was turning red now, you were not good at asking for help and even less to someone you barely knew

"Hm?" He nodded again, giving you permission to request that favour

"I'm so weak, I just can't fight, I can't fight like you or Bakugo or even Iida or Uraraka I just... I can't, I can't do anything but to heal and stay still watching how everyone loses" he kept looking straight to your eyes, truth be said, he hadn't took his eyes out of yours since you started talking but now he looked confused and even kinda angry at your statements

"And so what?" Did he took you for an idiot? He surely talked to you like if you were a 6 years old kid

"That I want to be a hero" his eyebrowns bent "and I need help, I... no one has ever really taught me how to fight, no one saw any potential for that on me and... maybe if you could... give me some basic knowledge? I could at least avoid getting hit"

Silent

Absolute silent

You only heard one thing, your heart bumping at an scarily fast race and your

Not only it was beating, your stomach ached, your skin burned and you felt stupid for asking for help so you opened your mouth to retract your words and admit that it was an stupid idea

"I don't train anyone, I have my reasons, I won't train you or teach anything"

And with that he left you, even more disappointed than before

Of course that night you could only think about leaving the heroes course

But after thinking about it you chose to keep fighting

And from that day on, you would train everyday, without any exception.

It didn't mattered that your classmates would though you were a weirdo, you kept imitating every single thing they did.

You stopped attending those classes that were not about fighting, you did not needed them as much as you needed free time on the special playground that the UA had, there you could train much better than on your small room

And one day, while your classmates were eating- something that you hadn't done since the day you started using every second on the UA for training- your body failed you, it needed a break and you wouldn't accept it so it just failed to get some rest.

You weren't able to keep your breathing and your legs weren't going to obey you anymore

So you just... felt

And without having any real strength to stand back you stood there, surrendering

You had been weeks working with no hesitation and yet you hadn't improved in the slightest

You were giving up when Todoroki tended you his hand to lift you up

"I did not want to train you because I really don't want you to get hurt by my training or to feel that I am pressing you too much" you weren't really following him "but if you are going to do that to yourself all alone then it will be better if I help you so you can, at least, improve"

Was he agreeing to train you?

"But first, go eat, second attend all your classes and then we will train"

"Yes!" You answered, ready to become a real hero

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