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idkwhatever580 · 1 day

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Are you f****** kidding me?!

Masterlist

Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader

Prompt: y/n has very bad trauma with alcoholism in her family, so she never drinks. Natasha never pushes it and is always protective of her decisions but what happens when the boys play a little “prank”on y/n?

Warnings: trauma, ptsd in a way?, reader freaks out, getting drunk, spiked drinks, protective nat, swearing, mentions of sh, fake allergic reaction.

A/N: guys sometimes I’m not great at explaining things in the warnings. So I put a question mark lol. I hope y’all understand it though.

Y/n’s pov

Once again I’m at one of Tony’s parties. I think his excuse this week is his mom’s business partner’s daughter is having a birthday soon.

Whatever. There’s no point in actually caring it’s just another ploy for him to get drunk.

I usually leave before that time.

I start off my night with a water. I plan to finish the night with the same. Then suddenly Pietro comes up to me with Sam and says

“Hey y/n!”

I smile at him and notice he’s holding two drinks.

“Hey Piet. What are you doing?”

He smiles and says

“Bringing a drink to my favorite person.”

I roll my eyes at him. We get along because we like to prank people a lot. And play video games.

I frown as he hands me a drink and I say

“Piet you know I don’t drink”

He curses under his breath and says

“Oh right yeah! Let me take that and I’ll get you a virgin drink yeah?”

I nod my head and thank him as they both walk away. I guess Sam is just trailing along.

After a few minutes they come back and hand me a different drink and I say

“What is this?”

He looks at it and says

“A drink doofus”

I roll my eyes at his antics and say

“No I mean what’s in this drink?”

He looks at Sam and says

“It’s like a celcius!”

Sam agrees quickly and I say

“Oh. So like an energy drink?”

They both nod their head in unison and I smirk and say

“Thanks guys. You know I have a hard time with these things. Especially since nat is on a mission right now.”

Sam wanders off and Piet stays by me as I drink a few sips. It’s pretty good.

We talk a bit and Piet says

“How is that flavor? I have something else and I was just wondering.”

I smile and say

“It’s orange I think. Not the best but it’s decent.”

His eyes have a fire in them and he says

“Here! Why don’t I get you a different flavor?”

I nod and say

“I’m sure two wouldn’t hurt right? It’s only energy drinks and they don’t really affect me”

He nods and says he’ll be right back so I finish off my drink and wait for him.

When he comes back he has a slightly pink tinted drink for me and i immediately try it.

“This one is good!”

He nods his head.

I have about three of those drinks and I’m starting to feel great. My stomach hurts a bit but I feel fine.

And this girl is talking to me and her jokes are literally so funny. Like I have the giggles or something.

We start dancing and then I somehow end up with Wanda. We’re best friends but we are not leaving any room for Jesus. I usually don’t have this much fun at these parties.

Then I end up on a couch with another girl by my side and I’m just talking her ear off. She looks interested.

All of a sudden I get a rush of heat over my face. I just zone out trying to pinpoint what’s going on.

By now the girl has left and I see a flash of red come in my view.

“Y/n? Y/n detka focus on me. Where are you baby?”

My beautiful girlfriend Natasha pulls me from my trance and I throw myself on her and say

“Natty!!”

She lets me hug her and I get another rush of that feeling again.

She notices and says

“Are you alright?”

I nod my head and then think, and shake my head.

“What’s wrong detka?”

I lean on her shoulder as she sits next to me and I say

“I don’t know. I feel weird.”

Natasha looks at the table and sees three glasses and says

“Are those yours?”

I nod and smile

“Piet got me these three flavors of energy drinks. I can’t remember what he said they were called though. But he said they were like celcius”

She nods and grabs one of the glasses. She picks it up to her nose and smells it and sets it back down.

“Y/n you said you liked these? And you wanted them?”

I nod me head and say

“They were really yummy but I think they’re hurting my tummy a bit”

I pout and she looks to the side as if she’s scanning the crowd for someone. I follow her eyes and they land on Pietro and Sam who are giggling like teen girls. I slur out

“What are they laughing at natty?”

She looks to the side unsure of what to say and my eyes widen and I sit up. This realization has my mind sobered up a bit and I look at her with tears in my eyes.

“Nat? Is that alcohol?”

She bites her lip unsure of what to do but she nods her head and I say

“Pietro and Sam told me it wasn’t. They said they got me a virgin kind.”

She shakes her head and says

“I’m so sorry baby”

I shake my head and push her away. I immediately get up and walk off. I almost bump into a few people and I trip up a bit but not bad. I go straight to our room and Natasha decided to stay back to handle the perpetrators.

She makes sure Friday alerts her if I end up anywhere other than our room.

Nobody’s pov

To say Natasha was angry was an understatement.

She was furious.

She had to watch you storm off to probably go and cry because of what they did to you.

She stands up and brushes herself off. And then she calmly walks over to Pietro and Sam.

They say

“Oh hey nat! You’re back!”

Natasha smiles at them and says

“You wouldn’t happen to know what was in those drinks that you gave y/n would you?”

They shrug their shoulders and say

“What drinks? What are you talking about?”

Natasha is pissed so her patience is gone and she grabs them both by the ear and pulls them to the side of the room.

The noise isn’t any less quiet, it’s just out of the way.

And she goes ballistic.

“Are you fucking kidding me?! Do you know what you did to her?! Everybody knows that y/n doesn’t drink because of her fears that she will end up like her father. She’s probably in our room now panicking about how she’s an alcoholic from three drinks!! And you!”

She points to Pietro

“You know better than to do that! You know she has problems. And you still did that! I should have the both of you banned from stark parties forever! You both intentionally spiked her drink! You two are literally dead!”

By now the room is silent from how loud Natasha is screaming at them. All eyes are on them but she doesn’t care.

“She was your friend and you did this to her! That is the ultimate betrayal and I wouldn’t blame her if she never wants to see your faces again! Get out of here. I don’t want to see you at another party! And I expect there to be ample apologies tomorrow!”

They nod and scurry off. Wanda is behind natashw now and she gives her a look as if she’s asking if they really did that to you and Natasha nods her head.

Wanda’s eyes glow red and she walks off in Pietro direction.

After Natasha knows they’ll be handled she smooths out her shirt and looks around at everyone gawking at her.

She raises and eyebrow and says

“Would anybody like to go with them?”

They all shake their heads and go back to partying.

Natasha goes upstairs to find you in your room.

She slowly walks up to your ball of a self and says

“Y/n? Are you alright?”

Apparently she chose the wrong set of words because you shoot up and say

“No im not alright! How can I be alright?! I’m literally drunk because I’m a lightweight and I feel disgusting because I liked it. And that’s why I never drink because I’m just like my father and I’ll like that shit and I’ll probably get hooked on it now!”

You are pacing back and forth and your breathing is erratic so Natasha goes up and grabs you and says

“Woah woah woah. Detka please calm down. You need to hear me. You are not an alcoholic from getting drunk once. You know that you don’t drink and that you won’t drink. Just because you liked the alcohol does not mean you are hooked okay? You clearly don’t like being drunk at all because it is hurting you.”

You are now just standing in Natasha’s grasp as she speaks to you.

“And you are most definitely not your father. You know now to not trust them with drinks anymore. Listen. I’m so sorry they did that to you. But you need to know it is not your fault. At. All. They spiked your drink knowing that you don’t drink for a reason.”

Y/n’s pov

I nod my head taking in all this information. And I tear up a bit.

“Hey hey don’t cry baby. It’s okay. It’s not your fault”

I shake my head as some tears start to fall and I say

“No no. I’m not crying because of this. I’m crying because you’re so good to me. Nobody would have reassured me like this except you. I just love you so much.”

We both smile and kiss each other and then we pull away because there is a knock at the door and I softly say

“Come in”

Wanda steps in and says

“Hey. How are you?”

I smile and say

“Still drunk”

I laugh and Wanda says

“Do you want me to get you a water?”

Natasha shakes her head and says

“We keep bottles of water in our room. I’ll grab her one.”

Wanda nods and says

“Right well I just wanted to let you know that I just got onto both their asses again and they are on probation for two months”

I furrow my eyebrows and say

“Probation?”

Wanda explains to me that probation is basically they don’t get any missions for two months. And she also added in there that they have to do my mission reports for that length of time too which is amazing since I hate mission reports.

“Wow Wands. That’s so sweet. Thank you”

She shakes her head and says

“No problem. Now I have one more question. They want to come in and apologize to you. Is that okay? I just want to check.”

I think about it and Natasha says

“You don’t have to agree detka. They can sulk in their rooms for now.”

I smile when I get a devious idea.

“What if you guys help me prank them back!”

They raise their eyebrows in concern and say

“What kind of prank?”

I think and say

“I can use my makeup skills and pretend I cut myself because of how bad my mind got!”

Their eyes widen and they say

“Woah there. That’s a little much.”

“Yeah Wanda’s right. Maybe a less intense prank?”

I sigh and nod my head. And then I completely forget about my idea when I say

“Wanda! You can use your powers to temporarily distort my face and body and we can prank them by saying I’m having an allergic reaction to the alcohol! Make them regret it even more!”

Wanda smiles and says

“I think that’s a good idea, but you’ve already had the alcohol in your system for a while. I think allergic reactions happen faster”

Natasha says

“They’re stupid. We can say it was a late onset reaction”

I nod my head aggressively. A little too aggressive though so I say

“Woah. Too much head shake there”

Natasha stabilizes me as Wanda says

“Alright. Why don’t you sit on the ground and I’ll work my magic?”

I sit down a little slowly so that I don’t get woozy or anything and while I’m waiting, Natasha gets me a water to help me sober up.

Wanda then distorts my face to look all red and blotchy and I get fake hives everywhere. I smile and say

“Nat. When were pranking them we can go in my bedside table and grab my old inhaler. I can use it to puff and it won’t do anything, and say I’m out!”

She nods her head. Anything to make me feel better.

And Wanda steps out and says

“I’ll be back with the boys.”

I giggle at my devious plan and Natasha says

“You’re gonna have to stop giggling if you want them to believe it”

I nod my head and get in serious mode. I lie myself in Natasha’s lap as she sits on her knees to pretend like she’s cradling me.

We here Wanda walking back and saying

“You better apologize and mean it”

They reply with a few “yes ma’am’s” and Natasha decided now is a good time.

“Wanda!”

She all but yells.

Thank goodness the party is still going so nobody else can hear.

Wanda runs in with Pietro and Sam hot on her tail and they see me.

Natasha puts on a facade that she’s freaking out and I make my breathing labored as if my lungs are closing up.

“Wanda! Help me out here! Y/n’s having an allergic reaction to the alcohol! I need her inhaler!”

Wanda jumps into action and says

“Where is it?!”

“In her bedside table”

Wanda runs to get it and only now can I see the boys. Their faces are ghostlike when they realize what they’ve done.

I fake puff the inhaler and shake my head. Natasha checks it and says

“Fuck.”

Pietro and Sam are now freaking out and saying

“Wait she can’t have an allergic reaction it’s been like forever!”

Natasha responds with

“It’s late onset and now her inhaler is empty! None of this would have happened if you didn’t spike her drinks!”

I gasp and say

“Epi… pen”

And Natasha remembers I have an epipen for if I get stung by a bee. And there’s a trainer in the bag so she grabs the trainer and they freak out.

She uses the trainer which does nothing but make a click sound and then she sighs as Wanda makes the reaction fade slightly.

They all sigh in relief and Sam and Pietro are the first to say something

“Y/n we’re so sorry. We had no idea this would happen!”

“Yeah we wouldn’t have done it if we knew!”

Natasha looks up and says

“But you would have done it even though you knew about her father?”

Their faces once again go like ghosts and I start laughing at them.

They’re confused and Wanda starts to giggle.

I hop up and say

“You idiots! We pranked you back!”

They stand there confused. Sam is the first to say

“But- but you used an epipen”

I shake my head and say

“That’s the trainer. It helps people know what to do in a real situation. The trainer doesn’t have a needle or medication in it”

He sighs and says

“What about your inhaler?”

I shrug and say

“Empty one. Doesn’t do anything anymore.”

Pietro is just silent and I say

“Aww Piet. Are you sad that I just pranked you?”

He shakes out of it and starts apologizing.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I know you didn’t have a reaction but I’m sorry because I didn’t think about why you don’t drink. I knew why but I ignored it.”

I sigh and say.

“I forgive you Piet. Just remember that we don’t do pranks that cause harm to someone.”

He nods and I turn to Sam

“And I forgive you too. Now both of you. I’d like to inform you that I have been letting my mission reports back up and I’m glad to tell you that you have until the end of the week to finish five of them”

They groan and say

“Yes ma’am”

I smile and they leave. I turn to Wanda and say

“Thanks fairy wand. You made me feel a lot better”

And I turn to Natasha and say

“Thank you too”

Wanda leaves and we get into bed (not without me putting up a fight) and Natasha makes me finish the bottle before I fall asleep.

“Thank you natty. You’re so good to me”

She smiles and says

“You’re a little devil when you’re drunk you know that?”

I smile and say

“Eh. I’ll be fine tomorrow”

She rolls her eyes and we fall asleep in each others eyes with Natasha knowing I’m gonna be worse when I’m hungover.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: I hope y’all liked it! I kind of rushed it because I have a bunch of things lined up and this is just an extra tidbit I started before creating more lol

Taglist

@ilovesnat @ihartnat @marvelnatasha12346 @moistblobfish @justarandomreaderxoxo

#natasha romanoff #marvel #avengers #fanfic #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #fanfiction #black widow #mcu

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wayfayrr · 3 days

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Alright, I wonder how long an ask can be. U asked for it!😝

Also, if u were curious, since I’ve only played Botw and most but not all of totk, 98% of the time my yandere self-aware ideas will be of Wild/Tears.

How does Wild/Tears feel about the fairies? Like, is he embarrassed that reader has to watch that? Does he worry what they think? Or is he just like “eh, I can’t control their upgrade animations, sorry”. Then how does he feel when reader thinks it’s kinda cute/funny? I don’t want to traumatize the poor guy, but I must admit watching the level four animation is slightly funny bc I feel so bad for him. And in level three when he covers his face is cute.

What about when he just has to sit there for 10 hrs his time? Listen, I wanna upgrade the darn champion’s tunic but the stupid upgrades require 2 of each farmable dragon Zelda item. And I couldn’t find her for so long it was annoying. Ik she follows a certain path but even so u have to just keep following the path hoping u eventually run into her. So I just decided to farm an item, then sit there for 10 minutes r time until she’s farmable again. So how does Tears feel? Am I wasting his time? Is he bored? If he had an animation for it would he fall asleep? Would he glare at me for making him sit there for 10 hours? Plus, ima be honest. For those 10 minutes of me just waiting, I’ll usually scroll on my phone. I’m not gonna stare at the tv for 10 minutes, sorry lol. So is he mad that I’m not paying attention to him and stuff?

What about if I laugh at him? Alright, I don’t do it That much lol, just if I make an embarrassing mistake w him and he looks a little funny. Would he be embarrassed? Mad? ….?? I think he’s cuuute! It’s fiiine, right…?😭

Thinking about my one ask where I used him for science, totally not using bombs on him for any other reason! Anyway, so I have to admit, his overheating animation I like. I’m all for angst/whump w characters. Whenever I read AO3, 98% of the stories r angst/whump for Wild/Tears. Sicfic? Yes please! Nightmares? Yes please! Psychological torture? Sign me up! There was this one fic someone wrote about Wild being hit by a curse that trapped him in his memory next time he unlocked one, so he had to watch it over and over and over. The rest of the chain had to save him. Tho, if it makes u feel any better, I only like happy endings, no open ended ones, no sad ones, or character deaths. Nope. Fairy tale where they all lived happily ever after please and thank u lol. So anyway, I got sidetracked lol. My question was, would he be mad if I just put the game on the clothes menu when he’s overheating so he doesn’t lose any hearts over it, just watching him do it for a minute or two?

Sometimes I need to wear like one clothing item per outfit so I can use like 3 different abilities. For example, maybe bandana to climb faster, gloom shirt for an extra heartbreak, and snow pants bc it’s freezing? And sometimes I’ll complain that he looks ugly, well, not him, but the outfit, and say that I wish I could make him look cuter but I need these abilities atm. Does he hate the outfits like I do? Does he care more about function? Does he hate that I care so much?

How does he feel not being able to talk? Like literally every other character can talk except him. And he can’t do anything by himself. Everything he does is either a programmed animation or an action by my controller. I bet he has a lot he wants to say but can’t. Does he ever worry that if he were to get out and see me, what if he couldn’t talk to me??

🐰

yeah it's always a lot easier to think about the links you know better for stuff like this ngl, so I don't blame you for sticking to them. plus wild and tears are just fun too right? :3c

so starting from the top -

I think the fairies are a touchy subject for him, if you like the cutscenes then he can set his discomfort about being picked up and kissed somewhat - don't get me wrong he doesn't enjoy it but for your happiness he'll do it as many times as you make him (although, unless he finds a way to override the controls then it's not really like he has a choice in it) he'll make notes about how you like him acting in certain ways though - I mean if you like seeing him as a blushy mess covering his face in the game then you'll like it more when he's doing it in person right? Please don't make him recreate the level four one though.

To be honest, there's nothing that you could do to him that he could ever consider a waste of time. would he prefer you to be actively engaged? sure. Is he bothered if you're still there but just waiting for a bit for the dragon to recharge? Not really, yeah he'd prefer to be doing more, but at the same time it gives him a chance to observe and to get more of a grasp of how the game works while it's on and running compared to when he's robbed of his body and is left a being floating in a desolate void of numbers and machine code. He can relax and still have feeling and eyes on you and your eyes on him every now and then even though it's not as often as he'd like. as for the time? I think once he became aware he stopped running on hyrules time, so it's only ten minutes for him too. Ten minutes that granted feel longer than that cause of the scenery, but still only ten minutes. if it were a situation where he was still in a hyrule then he'd be further detached from anyone else. (my thoughts are if the game is left in standby on the switch then it's all still loaded and the links have free reign but if it's closed and you're playing another switch game then it tosses them into the abyss)

laughing at him for being cute is all good but please don't make fun of him ;-; he's only doing what you make him do after all!

I need to write more whump and hurt/comfort for tears actually, thanks for the reminder Well, he's not getting hurt by it -soooo he's kinda a bit deluded into thinking that it's another show of love for him. You simply love all the sounds that he's making <3 (and I don't blame you, his whimpers are actually just so adorable?????) You care so much that you're not letting him get hurt for your happiness!!!!

I think he takes it as a compliment that you care so much about how his outfits look, he wants to look his best for you too!!! If he could he'd find a way to stack the different bonuses so that you could treat him like a proper dress up doll without having to worry about the environment and how it impacts him :c he doesn't care what outfit he 'wears' cause it's not like he's actually wearing and interacting with it. it's glued to him like a second skin so whether you're keeping him shirtless or putting him in the thickest shirt possible there's no difference to him just don't mod him so that he's no longer himself please

The fact that there's a chance he wouldn't be able to communicate with you is something that he worries about alot, not even just not having a voice. He'd be fine with being mute if he can write or sign to you, hell he could probably delude himself into being fine that he couldn't do that if he could move freely and hold you. what scares him the most is the idea that he'd be like a puppet cut, that if he gets out that without the code acting as his strings he falls limp like a puppet cut loose. that's what's horrifying to him. anything else he could learn to live with, but that potential keeps him from making any rash movements where the cost could outweigh the benefits. I like to think that out of desperation, (this goes for sky in the fic too) they stole another characters voicebank from another game :) one that speaks your native tongue preferably, but at the very least one that shares a language you speak

#good thing I like talking about tears :DDD #one of my faveourite links tbh #love him soooooo #moss✦answers #yandere linked universe x reader #yandere linked universe #link x reader #yandere link #linked universe #lu tears #self aware au #self aware loz #🐰 anon

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icycoldninja · 2 days

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Good to see you back! I hope you’re doing well.

Could I request some headcanons for the Sparda boys + V with baby fever? Can be SFW or NSFW, or both, up to you lol

I'm doing great, thanks for asking. For this one we're keeping it SFW for the fluffies, hope you don't mind :)

Sparda boys + V x Reader baby fever headcannons

¤ Dante ¤

-Dante happened to be flipping through an old, partially burnt photo album, looking at faded pictures of Vergil and himself when they were babies.

-He then starts to tear up with emotion, seeing how cute the two of them were. He could only imagine the joy his parents must have felt whenever they saw their chubby bundles of joy.

-That's when he decides he wants a baby and goes straight to you to talk about it.

-You were a little surprised considering Dante had never even brought up the topic before, but after an hour or so of convincing, you agreed--Dante had spread the baby fever to you.

-Fast forward a month or so later and you're pregnant! You two are so excited, Dante in particular. He won't stop picking you up (gently, of course) and parading you around, screaming "I'M GONNA BE A DAD!" at the top of his lungs, laughing and whooping afterwards.

-He can't wait for his precious dumpling to get here already--they're gonna have so much fun together and make so many messes, you just know it.

■ Vergil ■

-Vergil happened to be passing through a park when he caught sight of a young couple and their newborn baby sitting on a bench while an elderly couple (possibly the grandparents?) took pictures of them.

-Vergil at first thought very little of this; this was a park and things like photo ops were common in parks, but for some reason, he found himself staring at the baby.

-It was just. So. Cute. He'd never seen a lifeform with such innocence before in his life. He wanted one, right now!

-Of course, it was very difficult for him to admit this to you, being the cold and serious devil hunter he was. Eventually, he wrote a note instructing V to write some poetry about wanting a child, then split himself.

-Vergil later delivered the poem to you and stood there awkwardly while you read it. After mulling it over for a moment, you agreed, and as a reward you got to see the sweetest, brightest, most hope and happiness filled smile you'd ever seen.

-You two are going to be the happiest, most loving parents the world has ever seen. Vergil even vows to give his child all the care and affection, and of course, MOTIVATION in the world.

□ Nero □

-Since Nero was always helping kids out at the orphanage, he knew all about babies and all the light they brought into their parents lives.

-He'd always wanted a baby of his own someday, but since he was young, didn't really give it much thought until one day he saw a happy family and their little baby in a stroller taking a walk down the street.

-Upon seeing how happy the family was, Nero felt his heart melt. This settles it, as soon as he got home, he would talk to you about starting a family.

-Nero was somewhat nervous bringing up the subject as he'd never even mentioned it to you before, but your quick acceptance and even eager agreement quickly assured him you had as much baby fever as he did.

-After you told him you were pregnant, Nero was all smiles and grins, prompting others to ask why he was always in high spirits. Nero, being proud as hell that he was gonna be a father soon, answered them eagerly.

-Nero swears to not be a deadbeat father like his own dad was, and to be there for his child whenever they need him.

● V ●

-V didn't really care about having offspring, and since you never brought it up, never gave it any thought.

-Then, as he limped down the street on his daily walk, V happened to pass a father holding his laughing baby daughter. V had to admit, the whole situation was very endearing....it sort of made him want to experience it for himself.

-Honestly, V wasn't too sure if he could have children, given his deteriorating state. He then decided to consult you on these matters as soon as he returned.

-You heard him out and to his surprise, readily agreed. Having a kid with the love of your life could be counter as your greatest and most fulfilling achievement in life.

-Even though V was no powerhouse, you guys managed to conceive, and spent the duration of the pregnancy planning for the baby's arrival and informing everyone you knew.

-V has already put together a simple book of nursery rhymes that he plans to read to your baby once it gets here.

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