#by act 3 the answers is probably their companions but eventually everyone leaves their side besides their possible li

[amatres]

I know you have to choose the option but the farewell conversation that sticks most in my head in the Gallows is with Carver where Hawke can say something along the lines of 'This is how we're supposed to be, side by side' and he tells them they know it can't be like that forever.

Like, my Hawke at least spent so much of her life building her identity in service of her family. Hawke most resembles their father no matter what, and the family is shaped around them narratively (if you're a mage or not deciding which sibling you lose first and how that class effects how those siblings feel about themselves and their place in the family) and they shape themselves around their family in turn, exist for them, takes up the role of leader after Malcolm has passed. The answers of where Hawke considers home when they're asked never felt right, because they lived on the run for so many of their formative years, the true answer feels like to me to be their home is their family, the place never mattered beyond being allowed to rest and not look over their shoulder every day.

What happens to that identity when everyone you built it around is gone? Where would they consider home when it's all said and done? The Amell estate was something they got for their mother, one of the answers they can give to Varric in Act 2 on what they plan to do now is watch over their mother, Carver tells Hawke to look after her when the expedition separates them. Then their mother is gone too.

There's no final statement for this since it's just me rambling, but it's hm, sad to think about. Who is Hawke if they aren't living for the sake of another, when all those they lived for are gone and they never felt at home anywhere but in the people they surrounded themselves with?

#ama mumbles #dragon age #dragon age 2 #hawke #allyn hawke (oc) #im not writing meta this is just me rambling thoughts specifically born from trying to figure out allyns uhh problems lol #by act 3 the answers is probably their companions but eventually everyone leaves their side besides their possible li #so what do they consider home who are they when they are truly alone #my hawke is a mage which also shapes this perspective i dont know how it affects nonmage hawke #anyway carver was right and valid to want to find an identity separate from the family #bc like look how his sibling destroys themself trying to shape themselves around it #as for my own hawke id say she felt most content in lothering she briefly was feeling the same in kirkwall in act 2 but when leandra dies #part of her dies with her i suppose. shes the champion of kirkwall and its a death sentence bc shes a mage so she decides #to try and help at least make the world a bit more comfortable for any mage that comes after her #allyn and anders in act 3 shaking hands over being suicidal and throwing themselves into at least making it mean something #by helping ppl like them maybe having a better life #on that point the chantry explosion didnt feel like a axe to allyn it felt like a release. finally the hold of this place has lifted #if that makes sense lol. kirkwall was only for her mother now that shes gone allyn was waiting for an end to her stay there and it came #back to being on the run. something that felt more natural to her. maybe one day she will have a small farm again #or maybe she will live in a city with a garden if the people she surrounded herself wanted to live there #just somewhere that the noose of her family's ghosts were no longer strangling her

[witchyintention]

10 Witches Of World Mythology

Witches and witchcraft have captivated the minds of everyone: from angry villagers wondering why the women of the town were gaining a sense of independence to the average Joe wondering whether that herbal tea last night was a potion or just really bad tea. Witches have been seen as objects of wisdom and evil in folklore for many generations.

10. Kikimora

The kikimora, whose name is extremely fun to pronounce, is a household spirit who must—above all—be respected. She is the female equivalent and wife to the domovoi, or male household spirit, and her presence is always made known by wet footprints. So what makes the kikimora a witch you don’t want to cross? Well, she’s somewhat harmless, but if she is disrespected, she will whistle, break dishes, and throw things around. Unless you like all of your things broken, you’d best stay on her good side.

9. Circe

A famous character in Homer’s Odyssey, Circe was a witch who lived on an island called Aeaea. She took up a rather peculiar hobby—she would turn passing sailors into wolves and lions and all sorts of animals after drugging them. Hey, some people collect stamps, others like turning men into animals. Who are we to judge?

When Odysseus visited Aeaea, Circe turned his men into swine, but Odysseus was given a magical plant by the gods that prevented Circe from morphing him. After making Circe swear not to betray him, Odysseus and his men lived under Circe’s protection for a year before attempting to sail back to Ithaca.

8. Morgan Le Fay

Most people are vaguely familiar with the legend of King Arthur and his companion the wizard Merlin, but few of us remember a character by the name of Morgan Le Fay. In the myths, she works tirelessly with her magic to bring down the good Queen Guinevere, who banished her from the court when she was younger. She tries to betray Guinevere’s lover, Sir Lancelot, and foil the quests of King Arthur’s knights. The ultimate fate of Morgan is unknown, but she does eventually reconcile with King Arthur and brings him to Avalon after his final battle.

7. The Witch of Endor

The Witch of Endor wasn’t necessarily malevolent, but the fate she spoke of was not one to be ignored. As the story goes, King Saul went to the Witch of Endor for answers about how to defeat the Philistines. The Witch then summoned the ghost of the prophet Samuel—who didn’t tell him how to defeat the Philistines—but prophesied that he would be defeated and join his three sons in the afterlife. Saul, who is wounded the next day in the battle, kills himself out of fear. And while the Witch didn’t technically make Saul kill himself, she was certainly an accessory.

6. Jenny Greenteeth

Depending on where in England you’re from, you may know this cruel hag as Ginny, Jinny, Jeannie, or Wicked Jenny. Jenny Greenteeth was a hag who would intentionally drown the young and the old for the sheer fun of it. In some legends, she devours the children and elderly. In others, she’s just a sadist who enjoys the pain her victims go through. She’s frequently described as having a green complexion and razor-sharp teeth. As with many creepy characters from folklore, she was probably used to scare children into behaving and staying close to the water’s edge when taking an afternoon swim. But the main moral to this story is this: stay away from green river hags.

5. Chedipe

Ah, the Chedipe. What art thou: a witch, a vampire, what? Either way, she’s no pretty dame in the moonlight. The Chedipe is a woman has died during childbirth or committed suicide and is to the Indian equivalent of the succubus. She rides on a tiger in the moonlight, and when she enters a home, not a soul will wake or notice her. She then sucks the life out of each man through the toes—yes, the toes—and leaves without a trace.

4. The Weird Sisters

Shakespeare’s Macbeth is one of the Bard’s defining plays, with brilliant characters galore and a story rife with magic, betrayal, and fear. But the very first characters in the story are the ones that set everything in motion—the Weird Sisters. And yes, they are more than a little weird, but in this case “weird” means “fate,” so they are the Sisters of Fate. They act as agents of destruction and not only send Macbeth into a spiral of corruption and paranoia, they send all of Scotland to war just to take one man out of power. Now that’s evil.

3. The Bell Witch

The Bell Witch is the most famous witch in American folklore, and her story is the kind that you’d tell around a campfire. The Bell Witch was supposedly a poltergeist that appeared in the home of John Bell, Sr. in 1817. The Bell Witch would attack members of the household and frequently swear at the family, and she eventually poisoned John Bell, Sr. by leaving a bottle of poison in the guise of medicine. Remind us to burn some sage tonight.

2. Hecate

Hecate was the Greek goddess of witchcraft. She was also the goddess of witches, sorcery, poisonous plants, and a host of other witchy attributes. Hecate was the daughter of the titan Perses, and she is still worshipped by some Greek polytheists today. It is said that the very concept of a jinx came from her, and shrines to her were raised to prevent the wrath of evil demons and spirits in the Greek mythos. One of her names—Chthonia—means “of the underworld.”

So what makes her so fearsome? Well, she’s the goddess of witchcraft. If she existed, she probably wouldn’t take too kindly to Europe’s (or Salem, Massachusetts’s) ancient habit of hating and burning/killing “witches” (who were likely just the unfortunate innocent). The fact that we’ve turned witches from fearsome wise-women who could inflict pain and healing into beautiful, televised women who use magic to cheat on their exams would probably irk her slightly.

1. The Graeae/Morai

So what witches do we conclude our list with? Why the very spinners of fate, of course. The Graeae and the Morai are two separate trios of witches who understand the whims of fate, but since they are often lumped together we’ll mention them both. The Morai spun the loom of fate, and everyone’s fate was tied to their loom, even those of non-mortals.

The Graeae, on the other hand, were three malevolent sisters—kin to the Gorgons (Medusa and her two lesser-known sisters). The Graeae were not the friendliest bunch, but they did share an eye, which they passed between themselves. The Graeae also had knowledge of the unknown and of fate, but they did not control it. So which is worse—sisters to Medusa or those who could snip your string of life? We’d steer clear of both of them if we were you, dear reader.

#witchblr #witchcraft #witch community #witches #witchythings #wicca #mysterious #europe mythology #magick #learning magick #real witchcraft #witchcraft blog #witchcraft 101

[phantom-curve]

someday this will have a real title pt. 3

wow this one got away from me a lil bit. did I use it as an excuse to listen to Wake Up on repeat for an hour? yes. did I cry while writing it? yes. do with that information what you will. 

I really like how this is turning out. honestly, thinking of writing a companion piece from Luke’s POV once I finish Julie’s. also, I realized while writing this that Luke basically ‘poofs’ into Julie’s space every time he interacts with her even though he’s not a ghost and I love that consistency.

still have no idea how long this will be, so thanks for just going on this adventure with me!

tag list: @blue-hat-girl, @lwhoscribbles (thank you! honestly, they’ve got such strong voices writing these characters is a delight. also, titles are hard), @bluefyoto94 (thank you!), @5sosmukefan, @moonlightxnder, @leahthewonder​ lemme know if you want to be added!

The second the entrance of Los Feliz High School was in her sight, Julie was unbuckling her seatbelt, bolting out of the car in a mad dash to escape into the academic institution. Luke didn’t even have time to fully park the car before she had slipped out of it, her curly head disappearing into the mass of students surging through the front doors as the first bell began to ring. Social etiquette dictated that she wait around long enough to at least thank Luke for the ride, but honestly, social etiquette could suck a fat one. She had been dealing with fake social graces for the last year and frankly, she was sick of all of the bullshit. She didn’t feel particularly inclined to extend said graces to overconfident band boys intent on disrupting her carefully constructed routine.

For the last year Luke had been content to ignore her presence in the few classes they shared, perfectly happy basking in the glory of being an upperclassman with unprecedented musical talent. Luke knew exactly where he was going and how he was going to get there. He didn’t stop to wait for the school to hook him up with gigs, he went out and made the shows happen for his band himself. Julie had always admired his confidence, wished she could be more like him.

She hadn’t always loved the cockier side to his attitude though. He had a tendency to act like god’s gift to music and it drove her insane considering there were kids at this school that worked just as hard as him but wouldn’t ever make it quite as far. Not everyone could be born with that kind of talent, but that didn’t mean he had to rub other people’s faces in it! She should know, hadn’t she always been complimented on her musical ability before anything else? And now that she didn’t have that same gift to offer up to the masses, wasn’t she just another forgotten face in the crowd?

Head low, shoulders hunched against the onslaught of emotion, Julie pushed her way through the morning crowd of students. She didn’t look up until she knew her locker would be in front of her, and even then she only lifted her head long enough to bury it inside of the metal box, pretending she was searching for the schoolbooks already in her backpack.

“Hey, under achiever.”

The familiar voice was warm, the nickname affectionate instead of insulting. It pulled a reluctant smile from Julie as she turned to meet her best friend’s gentle gaze.

“Hey, disappointment.”

Flynn gave her a little hip bump and a sad smile. Oh. So, word had already spread around the school.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Julie hefted her backpack higher on her shoulder, one hand reaching to pull her hat low. Too late she recognized how her own actions almost mirrored Luke’s earlier. Flynn, best friend that she was, linked her arm through Julie’s and began to lead them down the hallway towards homeroom.

“Okay.”

Julie breathed a sigh of relief. Her best friend could be like a dog with a bone sometimes, unable to let any perceived injustice go without a fight. She was thankful she had avoided whatever rant Flynn had at the ready for the time being.

“But we’re gonna have to talk about it eventually, Jules. You can’t just let them kick you out! You’re Julie Molina! Voice of an angel! Queen of-!”

Or maybe not. Flynn’s declarations cut off immediately at the cold look Julie sent her way.

“Right, don’t wanna talk about it.”

Julie nodded fiercely, unmoved by Flynn’s disappointed sigh as she pulled out of her grasp and slipped into her desk. Flynn hadn’t lost her mom and her ability to play music all at once. Flynn didn’t have the entire school breathing down her neck. Flynn’s life wasn’t falling apart in front of her eyes. Flynn didn’t get to judge. Head down, Julie fought back the feelings of shame and guilt, focusing on her anger instead.

She made it through most of the day like that, relying solely on the fuel her fury provided to get her through her classes. Until her last two classes of the day. Composition and Solo Vocal Studies. Except, she wasn’t in those classes anymore. She had been dropped from them like the useless failure that she was. Her dad still didn’t know, so there hadn’t been a meeting with the school to change her schedule. But she couldn’t just go to a class she had been asked to leave. The final bell rang, and Julie was left by herself in the empty hallways. She glanced at the closed classroom doors around her, feeling small and lost. Suddenly, the red-hot rage that had sustained her all day was doused by an overwhelming wave of sadness. She was alone.

Unable to stomach the thought of losing it in the middle of the school, Julie sprinted for the nearest exit. Her surroundings were a blur until she practically slammed into the metal doors, crashing her way outside. She took a few steps before doubling over on her knees, gasping for breath. She squeezed her eyes shut, focused on nothing more than the air going in and out of her lungs. It was breezy, the warm wind blowing her hair around, the wayward curls tickling her face. The sensation helped to ground her, and she finally opened her eyes, the panic receding as she stood. The door creaked open behind her. Julie stiffened at the noise. The hair on the back of her neck felt electrified, and she didn’t have to hear him speak to know who it was. A throat cleared.

“You, um...you dropped this.”

She heard fabric rustling, the soft swoosh of what must be his arm lifting. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment, the frustration she’d been thriving on all day creeping in at the edges. She clung to it like a lifeline as she turned to meet his puppy dog eyes.

“What, are you stalking me or something?!”

Her voice was hoarse, not as strong or snappy as she had intended. She balled her hands into tight fists at her sides, ready to verbally attack as she leaned forward waiting for him to respond. He didn’t say anything, eyes soft as he looked down to where his hand was outstretched holding...her hat. Her hands flew to her head, landing on hair instead of the trusty ballcap she had kept perched there for the last year. So that’s how her curls had gotten loose earlier. Heat rose again, burning its way up from her chest to her cheeks to the tips of her ears. She snatched it out of his hands, shoving it back on her head with more force than necessary.

“Thanks.”

“Sure thing. You, uh, bolted outta there pretty quick. Everything okay?”

She watched him bob slightly, like he couldn’t stop moving for even a second. His voice was melodic, somehow everything he said sounding like he was on the verge of bursting into song. In another life, she probably would have been charmed by him. Not in this life though.

“Fine. Looks like I’m done with school for the day I guess.”

She practically sneered at him. Something about his gentle prodding scratched at her. Everyone knew she was a disaster. Everyone knew she was out of the music program, a washed up has been before she had been able to even make it in the first place. He didn’t need to use the kid gloves with her.

“Oh yeah, I forgot you usually have...”

He trailed off, eyes downcast, hand reaching up to scratch the back of his neck. She glared, not even noticing that he somehow knew her schedule.

“Yeah. Usually. Not anymore. So.”

He rocked back on his heels, hands shoved in his jean pockets, arms flexing in an unfairly aggressive display of hotness. His eyes were still looking at her with that same gentle expression. Like he cared. Her fingertips itched and she realized with a start that she desperately wanted to grab her keyboard and pound out an angry ballad about this...this too nice fuckboy with a pretty face and she could see the notes forming now and she could practically feel the smooth chill of the keys under her fingers and...she staggered backwards.

What the hell was that?! Her heart raced, adrenaline spiking. Oh no. No no no. She couldn’t want to play for this dumb boy. She hadn’t been able to play for her dad or her brother. She hadn’t been able to play for Flynn, hadn’t been able to play for her mother. She couldn’t even play for herself! What kind of special magic did Luke freakingPatterson possess that made her want to play again? It wasn’t fair.

“I gotta go.”

She swerved around him, reaching for the school doors. They held fast, locked from the inside. Her shoulders slumped. Just her luck.

“Hey, Julie?”

She didn’t answer, but it didn’t stop him.

“I’m really sorry about your mom. She was an incredible songwriter. You are too.”

The last part was said quietly but Julie heard it anyway. She couldn’t help but scoff as she turned to face him again.  He stood perfectly still this time.

“How would you know that?”

His eyes, still so soft, crinkled a bit at the edges. Not a full smile, but she could tell he wanted to. Without breaking their stare down, he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a worn, folded square of paper. Her gaze dipped, eyes widening. Her breath caught in her throat. It couldn’t be. He held it out to her.

“I found it last year. In the practice room. I know I should have given it to you earlier, but there was never a right time. I’m sorry.”

Julie’s vision swam. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she reached out to take the paper he offered.

“I thought...I tried to...”

“I know.”

His voice was the sweetest croon as his fingers closed around hers, tucking the sheet music safely into her palm.

“I went back the next day, but...it was gone.”

“I’m so sorry. God, I should have had Alex give it to Flynn or something.”

“No.” She locked her eyes on his once more. “It wasn’t the right time.”

He gave her a small smile, bouncing just a bit on the balls of his feet again. And then, as if understanding that she needed this moment to herself, he gave her a small nod and disappeared around the side of the building. Julie closed her eyes for a moment, clutching the papers to her chest.

Last year, in a fit of heartbroken rage and unable to express herself through music like she had for her entire life, Julie had locked herself in the practice room after school and thrown an all-out tantrum. She had screamed herself sick, cried until she couldn’t breathe, and in a final fit of uncontrollable emotion, trashed the last song that she had written with her mother, finished just days before she took her last breath. It had been satisfying in the moment. A vow to give up the part of herself that was made up of her mother, cut the pain off at the source so to speak. She had regretted it the instant she woke up the next morning, but it was too late. By the time she got to school, the first student on campus even, the practice room had already been cleaned. The hollowed out, empty feeling of loss that had followed had been gut wrenching. The realization that she had thrown the last connection to her mother in the trash left a gaping hole in her heart. It had been a fitting punishment that Julie had never even gotten to play the final product. A fitting punishment that she would never play anything again.

Luke had just changed all of that. He had given her that piece of her heart back. Fingers trembling, she unfolded the pages. She traced the looping letters of her mother’s familiar handwriting, following the notes up and down the bars, the melody playing in her head as she read. At the very end, a final message she had missed before:

Julie, you can do it.

Love, Mom

It felt like coming home. Pages clutched to her heart once more, Julie leaned against the building, lifted her face to the sky, and wept.

#you guys this was supposed to be a fun lil writing exercise and now it's a full on fanfic #that's honestly v on brand for me #also this was supposed to be fluffy! blame julie for the angst!! #julie and the phantoms #jatp #juke #jukebox #julie x luke #luke x julie #julie molina #luke patterson #palina #Mads speaks #Mads writes #jatp ficlet #jatp fanfic #jule ficlet #juke fanfic #find the strength find the melody

[viltrumitesuperboy]

Owl Letters Part 1 (Draco x Male Hufflepuff Reader)

This can be read even if you’re not a Hufflepuff. I know, “why the fuck is there another part” cause i’m a DUMBASS thats WHY. Used the italicised parts of the request. I will consider doing the second one in the future. 

Here’s part 2.

Requested by: (draco) anon

1. Being sent/finding anonymous love letters & Draco reveals it’s him 2. Draco constantly winks and flirts with the reader in the great hall/class 3. Reader crushing on Draco, but refuses to admit it bc of Draco’s attitude towards others. He catches on & reveals a sweeter, gentler side

Word count: 1485

"Seriously, what are you looking at?"

You turn to your friend with a huff.

"Nothing! Just zoning out," you muttered.

"Does zoning out include thinking about Draco Malfoy?" Elliot snickered.

You glared at him, then looked back down at your book with a blush.

"Oh, I think (Y/N) fancies someone!" whispered your other friend, Violet, as she leaned over from the Slytherin table.

"Go back to your house before you get in trouble, Violet," Elliot hissed.

"Fine, but you know I can get in a good word with Malfoy. He and I are close," she boasted.

"But you make fun of him?" you questioned.

"And have you seen him retaliate?"

You and Elliot gave each other a shrug in agreement. You reached across the table and shooed her away, and she pushed off of the bench to go back to her spot. A professor turned towards her direction before she was seen.

"I don't know how she does it," Elliot growled. "I think she's the only person in the entire school not to get in trouble."

"You're forgetting the Mandrake incident," you supplied. "And potions. And when she sent Malfoy a Howler telling him that he left his book in the common room."

You and Elliot smiled before breaking into a fit of giggles, going back to your studies. Naturally, yours consisted of looking at Draco from your strategically chosen seat where he was in your line of sight. He was too busy either talking to his own friends or studying, but you hadn't realised that his friends were not and took notice in your staring.

"Malfoy, I think someone fancies you," Blaise mumbled, his eyes trained on his quill.

"Really? Is it your quill?" Draco replied sarcastically.

"Take a look at the Hufflepuff table."

Draco turned around and scanned the Hufflepuff table behind him from his left to right with a piercing gaze. His eyes landed on you, and you quickly looked ahead of you with a jerk of your head. You started to whisper to your friend, who he knew to be Elliot.

"(L/N)?" Draco scoffed. "You must be joking. He would never speak to me even if I tried."

"Maybe it's because you made fun of his friend Kingston," Pansy sighed.

"Since when?!"

"Since you said he was muggle-born and he came right back at you with his family of wizards."

Draco huffed, a light blush forming on his cheeks in embarrassment.

"I've changed. And not many families have wizards and witches of all houses. How was I supposed to know?"

"Maybe stop being such a bloody arse and judging people," someone said.

Violet dropped into the small spot between him and Pansy, who quickly moved over to make room.

"Look, Draco. For some reason, my friend really likes you. And I have a feeling you like him too, since he's probably the only person you've never even slightly insulted. It's possible he sees something under your rude facade. Figure it out."

Draco was silent as she returned to her spot, once again narrowly avoiding getting caught by a professor. His eyes trained onto your blushing form, watching as you magically sent a crumpled up paper at Violet's head. Pansy waved her hand in front of his face, and he snapped back into reality.

"What?!"

"I said, Blaise and I have an idea," she smirked.

Receiving letters was your connection to the outside world. As much as you loved Hogwarts, you needed to know what was going on outside of your studies. Your muggle family members kept your parents in touch with the muggle world, so your life still included making fun of the Kardashians and looking forward to the latest films.

A letter from your parents dropped onto the table in front of you, and you grabbed it in excitement. You opened it quickly and began to read it to yourself.

"Elliot, they said they have a gift for me! And after I haven't heard from them in weeks," you said.

"I got a dumb toy," he sighed. "Oh wait, that's for you."

You both laughed, and he put away his own things in the box as you looked at the stuffed toy.

"This niffler is adorable! I'm keeping it forever."

You hugged it to yourself with a smile, and stole a quick glance at Draco. He was facing your table this time, and you locked eyes with him. You both looked away almost instantly.

"Hey, Malfoy's watching me," you mumbled. "Do I look dumb with this toy?"

"No way. He's probably just wondering what it is, growing up in a world of magic. If he thinks you look dumb, he'll have to answer to me," Elliot vowed.

"And Violet!" Violet said, hopping into the spot next to Elliot. "Hey, looks like you have another letter."

One of the last few owls swooped down to drop you a letter. You watched it leave with the others. You picked up the letter and examined it, finding only your name on it.

"What if it's cursed? There's nothing on this."

"Just open it!" Violet said. "We'll be right here to protect you."

You gave her a look before slowly opening it. You breathed a sigh of relief when nothing happened. The letter was well-written in a neat cursive, with clear ink lines from a new quill. It was pretty much just compliments for you and your dedication to learning magic. It warmed your heart and you couldn't help but smile as you read it.

"It's signed as a secret admirer," you said, showing it to Elliot and Violet.

"Wow, they sound dumb," Violet said without another thought.

"Stop, it's so sweet," Elliot scolded. "What if it's Malfoy?"

"It's not his handwriting," Violet said, still scanning the letter.

You and Elliot stared at her. You could feel yourself dropping a little, but not enough that they could tell.

"What? I get notes from him sometimes. And I'm not the one who has a crush on the most unlikeable wizard in all Hogwarts history."

"Hey, he is likeable!" you exclaimed defensively. "The main reason I like him at all is cause he really does care about people. I've seen it."

Elliot gave you a skeptical look, and Violet just went back to her seat. Eventually you had to leave the dining hall for classes.

When you started Care of Magical Creatures with Slytherins, you realised just how bad some students could be around animals. It was easy for you because you liked animals, but it seemed some people were really bad with them. More specifically, Draco Malfoy, who couldn't get near an animal to save his own life. He sat next to you that class, strangely enough, and you didn't speak to him because you didn't need to. Right after class, he stopped you as everyone was grabbing their belongings.

"(Y/N)? Do you mind if I could ask you for help? For this class?" Draco asked quietly.

"Malfoy asking for help? Your pride must be hurt," you quipped, giving him a small grin.

"Oh, it is. But I mean it," he muttered, tapping the strap of his bag.

You motioned him out of the classroom as you made your way to your own classes. You walked slowly with him, standing a bit to the side of the hallway.

"Start with your own companion. Bonding with whatever pet you have, magical or not, is the first step for any animal. Maybe give it something it'll enjoy, like some food. Meet me outside the Hufflepuff common room this weekend, and tell me how you've done."

You waved him off as you turn to go to your own class, knowing he went the other way after weeks of sharing the same class. You then caught up to Elliot to tell him what happened.

"I can't believe he asked me! And I didn't even act nervous!"

"Aren't you one of the top in the class?"

"Because everyone else dislikes animals of any sort, but that doesn't count!"

Elliot sighed and pat your shoulder, then his eyebrows furrowed. He pulled a piece of paper that wasn't in the main, larger pocket and handed it to you.

"This doesn't look like your handwriting."

You looked at it and read it quietly to yourself. It was addressed from the "secret admirer" and had more reasons as to why they liked you, which included your appearance as well as your personality and humour.

"There's something else in there," Elliot said, and pulled out a small container of Glacial Snowflakes.

"I love those!" you exclaimed, grabbing it and inspecting the packaging. "We should check if whoever gave this did something to it."

"That was my thought exactly," Elliot laughed, taking it from you carefully. "I'll let you know by the end of the day."

"Elliot, you're such a good friend."

"I'm your best friend. Now let's get to class."

#x male reader #male reader #draco malfoy x male reader #draco x male reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy

[empresspeacock]

Find the White Wolf Pt. 3

Summary: Geralt goes missing and you’re determined to be the one who finds him and brings him home

Pairing: Geralt x Reader

Warnings: Violence, language, slow burn smut

A/N: I have only watched the show on Netflix, I have never played any of the games or read any of the books. If I break canon, that’s why. Plot based on my imagination, so you do not have to watch the show to enjoy.

Link to Part 1  Link to Part 2  Link to Part 4

Word Count: 1908

Welllll great. Just great. Geralt could understand what you were saying. So he knows that you have no plan of escape for him. Maybe he's been saying save me to everyone who chooses him? That doesn't sound very smart. He knew what you were saying.

"I will try my best," you eventually say. You turned back over and tried to go to sleep. It took you a long time because you were racking your brain on how to make an escape plan or how to at least get more information for an escape plan. You must have fallen asleep eventually because when the sun beaming in from the window fell on your eyes, you woke up.

You turned around to face Geralt. He was still there. It wasn't a dream. In the sun, you could now see more scars than you saw last night in the candlelight. Gods, he had a lot of them. Some were clearly older than others. And frighteningly some were new. They must have beaten him at some point for his "attitude problems". You couldn't help but feel pain in your heart for him. You have to get him out of here. The main problem was how. How the heck are you supposed to get him out of here?

The sun began to shine some more on him and he stirred, smiling in his sleep. Then with a start, his eyes shot open. He started to lift his head, then groaned, closed his eyes, and lowered his head.

"Are you okay?" You ask.

"No." He huffed.

Of course he's not okay. That was a dumb question. He's been captured, enslaved, and put under heavy sedation for fighting his captors.

"Well, is there anything I can do for you? Immediately I mean. Obviously I need to help you escape, but like, would you like some water? Something eat maybe?" you babbled out.

"Both would be nice," Geralt murmured.

Great, he can speak full sentences now. So he's not as sedated as he was last night. But you still haven't come up with a plan for him. Maybe he's been devising a plan of his own since he's been captured? And you're the final piece to his puzzle he didn't know he needed to complete his grand plan of escape? Or did you pose a new risk for him since he'd likely have to protect you most of the time since you can't fight well. Not with swords at least. You can throw hands when the time requires it, but fist fighting is much different from sword fighting.

You got up to get him a cup of water from the pitcher on the dresser. As you poured, you asked "How sedated would you say you are right now? And how much do you remember from last night?"

"Well, my head fucking hurts and my limbs still feel really heavy, so I guess I'm still sedated. As for last night, not much." He said.

Not much? So he doesn't know you don't have a plan yet! Excellent.

"I do remember you don't have much of a plan yet though."

Jesus fucking christ, this guy just had to rain on your parade, didn't he.

"Well, if it makes you feel better, I don't have a plan for escape yet no, but I do have a plan for how to get more information." You defiantly say as you walk over with the cup of water. You sat on the edge of the bed next to him and held the cup close to his mouth.

"Oh?" He said while sitting up slightly and then took a few sips of water.

"Yes. I have the option of toting you around on my arm as eye candy while I gamble or play various other games."

"No." He immediately said in a low, sexy voice. Okay, well he wasn't trying to be sexy in the moment of course, but gods, the slight gravel to his voice, the bass, it just made your heart do a backflip even if he was shooting down your plan.

"Yes. Unless you have a better plan," you shot back.

He simply glared at you.

"Exactly. So here's what I'm thinking. In order to convince them that they do not need to further sedate you and hopefully give you time to work the drugs out of your system, you will need to act like you are obedient to me. If you-"

"Nope. Absolutely not. I am not doing that," Geralt interrupted.

"I'm not going to make you actually do anything. I'm just going to make some jokes about putting you in your place, how you've learned to be submissive, stuff like that, and that I'm enjoying your company now that you aren't sedated. Now will you please stop interrupting me? You haven't even heard my plan yet and you're already shooting it down!" You were very frustrated at this point. Here you were trying to help this guy escape, he didn't even have a plan of his own, but here he was rejecting yours. You put the cup down on the nightstand and stared down at Geralt. How dare he? The nerve of this guy.

"I don't have to hear it because I already don't like it." He replied.

"And how much do you like being a prostitute?" You narrowed your eyes at him. You tried to keep your breathing low and even, but your temper was definitely starting to get the best of you.

Geralt simply continued to glare at you. You could see his facial muscles move as he clenched his jaw.

You stared at each other like that for what felt like an eternity, but was probably just a couple minutes until someone knocked on the door.

"Are you awake and decent?" a gentle female voice said from the other side.

In a loud voice you called out "Yes, we're awake but not decent. Just a moment please." Through gritted teeth you seethed at Geralt "Now listen here. You follow my lead and pretend to be submissive. When you come up with a better plan, we can flip the narrative and follow your plan at that time. Until then, just be quiet and try to look pathetic." You got up and walked to the door. You opened it up just enough to poke your head and part of your torso through the door.

"Geralt is still getting decent, how can I help you?" you said in the best apologetic voice you could manage.

"Breakfast will be ready soon, did you have a good night?" the handmaiden said in a voice much too chipper for the time of morning.

This time you spoke in your best Karen voice. "No, actually I did not. Y'all made my companion too sedated and he wasn't able to do much of anything other than grunt. He couldn't even get his dick up. I am very disappointed in the service I've received so far."  Hopefully your plan works, because if not, you don't have too many other ideas.

"Oh no! I'm sorry to hear that. If you'd like we can switch out your companion for a new one and-"

"No. I want this one. He's the only one I'm attracted to. I just want him to be less sedated. Even better if he's not sedated at all. I like them better when they put up a struggle." You quickly interrupted.

"Yes, certainly. I will speak to Mera and when you come down to breakfast, we should have a solution for you by then." She made a slight curtsy and walked down the hallway.

You closed the door and turned around to face Geralt. You set your face to look as serious and as threatening as you could. Given the monsters Geralt has fought in the past and the fact that you admitted to him that you can't even fight well, you doubted you looked much like a threat to him. But you meant business. "You can be submissive for a few days and then we make our great escape or I can leave you here, find more members of my family, then try to gather some witchers, come back, and then break you out of here. Something that's probably going to take at least a month. Your choice."

Geralt smirked and lightly chuckled. "I suppose I don't have much of a choice do I?" he said after a few moments.

"No, you do," you said, this time with a little attitude in your voice. "But you need to make your decision now, because I'm not going to waste precious time and energy on something that you're not going to commit to and then cause the plan to fail."

Geralt looked at you with the smirk still on his lips, but his eyes clearly said he wanted to throttle you. After about a minute he said "Just how submissive am I supposed to be?"

"Enough to sell the act."

"That's not an answer."

You rolled your eyes. "How am I supposed to have an answer to that question? That's not something you can easily quantify." You walked over to the dresser to change into the new set of clothes provided for you. Whether Geralt made up his mind or not, you were going to eat breakfast, and you're going to eat in fresh, clean clothes. He watched you pull out some of the clothing and hold it up to yourself to see which one fit best for a couple minutes before finally saying "Fine. I'll be submissive for two days. If your plan isn't working, I'm dropping the act."

You turned your head to look at him. "And then you're going to do what, exactly?"

"If your plan isn't working, I will have figured it out by then."

"How reassuring." You rolled your eyes again and went back to browsing.

"My brain isn't exactly in the best condition to think right now, which is the only reason why I'm going along with this in the first place." He grumbled.

Finally, you found something that fit. You started to walk toward the bathroom to change and then stopped in front of the bed to look at Geralt. "You still have the option of waiting for me to go get help."

Geralt moved slightly. Was he- did he wince? You don't know him well enough to read his body language yet.

"No, no that's- that's not an option" he stammered.

Okay, so definitely a wince. What did these people do to him to make someone so strong, so fearful? You didn't want to imagine. You continued walking to the bathroom. You didn't know what to say to him. You got changed and came back out to the bedroom. To your surprise, Geralt had changed too. He was leaning on one of the bed posts for balance with his arm wrapped around it.

"Ready to go to breakfast?" you say. He didn't look so good. His face was pale and sweaty from effort. How long did you take to get changed? You didn't think it was that long, but you were lost in thought, so maybe you took longer than you realized.

"As ready as I'll ever be" he mumbled.

Did he have the energy to follow what you had come up with? Well, I'll just tell him and if he thinks he can't do it, hopefully he'll tell me.

"Okay, so here's the plan."

#Geralt #The witcher geralt #witcher geralt #geralt x reader #slow burn #fanfic #self insert #geralt of rivia #the white wolf #the witcher #find the white wolf #i love geralt #fan fiction

[unabashedhonesty]

Random Guy Following Me At 4:00 AM

Okay, so I'd probably be doing Humanity, Fate, and Karma gross injustice altogether if I didn't share this: So, I typically work twelve-hour shifts at a nightclub nearby the Las Vegas Strip. My husband and I live on the far side of the valley, up near the mountains. Since he's a cancer survivor, his energy still isn't what it used to be, so he doesn't pick me up at 3-5 a.m. from work anymore; I get Lyfts home instead. Or, if a coworker is leaving work around the same time, I'll occasionally be fortunate enough to get a ride. Anyways, one night, after a particularly torturous shift due to absolutely ZERO money flow, I was given the option of leaving early. I debated it at first -- on the one hand, I had made absolutely no tip money that night (it was AVN weekend) and I needed to at least leave with ride money so that I could get home. On the other, I was exhausted, frustrated, stressed, and just wanted to be DONE. Then one of the ladies I work with offered to give me a ride home if I left right then. I agreed and went about my clocking-out process. (We have to get a signature from three managers and changed out of our work clothes and into our street clothes before we are allowed to clock out and leave, so it takes several minutes.) I tried to hurry along so as not to keep her waiting, but she said to take my time. Good timing, too, because we had lots of feature acts performing that night and every manager was running nonstop all night, so it was hard to nab them in good time. Twenty minutes later, I return to the locker room, change, and clock out -- only to discover that my coworker had left me behind. And, now that I was clocked out, I couldn't clock back in. I could find no one else to get a ride from. I hadn't made enough that night money to pay for one. I couldn't wait until my husband was awake enough to come pick me up; the club would be long closed by then -- and I would be forced to leave anyways. I had no choice but to walk the eleven miles back to my house. At 3:30 a.m. Sunrise wasn't until after 7:00, this time of year. The walk was going to be AT LEAST three hours. So, with earbuds in, keys in my fist, and a 25-pound work duffel bag on my back, I set out to get myself home. Now, at first, I hardly spared a second thought to my "going for a walk" regimen; it's a routine I've had engrained since I was old enough to be on my own. It's almost Pavlovian, I suppose, to do certain, specific things that I normally wouldn't even think about if I were out with a companion -- yet, even as I was doing my usual 360-degree-casual-glancing-around tick to discreetly survey my surroundings, occasionally pretending to adjust the earbud that I'd purposely damaged so that I could keep one ear open at all times, it had never occurred to me before that night just how normalized the real terror women face everyday is. And nothing spelled it out clearer than when, about five or six blocks from my workplace, I noticed a man walking about 50 yards behind me. I tried to think nothing of it, but it's not a major street we're on, so there aren't many people(witnesses) around. Not that I'm paranoid, or anything. But, my mom always said "trust your gut first, your heart second," so I played it cool and casually began singing a little louder. I continued my idle glances around and noticed the guy still hadn't changed course -- and he seemed to be getting closer. I started to sing even louder and off-key, throwing in a few unflattering dance moves while I was at it -- because my entire skin is tingling with anxiety at this point. Finally, I hit an intersection. Because of the direction I was going, I needed to cross either way, so I hit both crosswalk buttons and prayed one would activate before that guy caught up with me. The guy caught up with me, so I kept up my nervous dancing around and pretended to be so engrossed in my music that I wasn't paying attention to anything around me. I readjusted my keys in my fist without really thinking about it. When at last the walk signal flashed, I started trotting as casually as I could. One of my earbuds had fallen out, so I was just putting it back when I suddenly heard a voice next to me, "So, you wear your sunglasses at night, too?" I glanced up and pretended to not really hear him, still adjusting my earbud. But, out of professional reflex from being in the food/bar service industry for so many years, I couldn't stop the, "I beg your pardon? Could you repeat that?" from leaving my mouth. But then I began to process the man now walking alongside me: His voice and tone was light, silky, and a little in the high register. His stride was long, laid back, leading with the feet -- akin to the way flamboyant men carry themselves. He was tall and appeared around his early thirties, with a full, trimmed beard. He was also sporting a pair of fabulous sunglasses that John Lennon would have been jealous of. I suddenly began to relax. Finally returning the friendly smile aimed my way, I chuckled and explained that, yes, I wear slightly tinted glasses because light gives me headaches. The next thing I know, I'm wrapped up in a surprisingly pleasant conversation with a random stranger as if we'd been lifelong friends. Then, he catches me off guard by eventually saying, "You know, when I saw you walking earlier, and you kept turning around, I was thinking, 'Oh, my god, this girl is probably so terrified right now. How do I make myself not-scary?'" Now, he laughed to dispel the tension -- and I laughed as well -- but then we began discussing the very real danger we were both so acutely aware of that we had to politely laugh about it. Let me say that again: THE VERY REAL DANGER WE WERE BOTH SO ACUTELY AWARE OF THAT WE HAD TO POLITELY LAUGH ABOUT IT. Then, suddenly, we were sharing horror stories about getting jumped, assaulted, and/or attacked on the street -- about how we got away by shear guts, ingenuity, and luck. I told him about the pocket knife I'd lost years ago, when my car had broke down and I had to walk to the nearest gas station and was jumped by a man who wanted a quickie instead of a "no." I'd had my left hand in my pocket. When he grabbed me in a bearhug and started to pick me up, I produced the knife and proceeded to slam it into the man's kneecap before running as fast as I could. (Oh, and this was in broad daylight, on the side of a busy highway at 9:00 in the morning, by the way. Guess how many people pulled over to help me...???) This young man seemed fascinated -- but not surprised -- when I told him my routine every time before I go outside. Even as I explained it to him, it began to truly dawn on me the amount of wrongness about the whole thing. This young man acknowledged how frightening that must be; that, yes, even he's had to deal with harassment before, but never to the extreme that women do. He also commented on how he can't imagine living with that constant worry, always having to suspect everyone just to be sure. I couldn't express to him enough how breathtaking it is to finally talk to someone who GETS IT. I didn't have to break it down into simple terms and examples to explain just HOW different the everyday world is for different individuals. I nearly wept with relief that -- FINALLY -- I met somebody who actually understood. This young man ended up keeping me company until we reached his neighborhood. He apologized for having to leave me, but we said our farewells and he wished me a safe remainder of my journey. I thanked him once again and I continued on. Out of instinct and habit, I was still aware of his presence until I was out of range. Before that happened, however, I noticed him answer his phone as he was walking away. I faintly heard his voice as he answered it. It was not quite the same voice with which he spoke to me; it had become a bit flatter than the tenor he'd used earlier. I glanced through the bars bordering his neighborhood as he walked towards wherever he was headed. His stride had changed; it wasn't airy and flamboyant anymore, but wide and a little heavy. The only words I caught before I lost sight of him was, "No, I'll be right there. I just had to..." A lot if things clicked into place as I finished the final two hours of my walk: 1) Yes, I had been initially wary of the strange man who had been walking in my direction. 2) I immediately acted on those feelings in a way that I hoped would deter him from me and/or draw attention to myself from other people -- JUST because he was walking near me. 3) I immediately relaxed when I took note of specific characteristics this man exhibited -- which I later realized I subconsciously filed under NON-THREATENING. 4) This young man opted to keep me company the rest of his way home so that I wouldn't have to walk alone -- without ever bringing attention to that. 5) Never once did he ask me any personal questions nor did he ever comment on my appearance. 6) Although I was harassed/followed by three other people that night, none of them came about until that young man was no longer at my side. And last, but not least..... 7) That young man consciously acknowledged the reality of my situation, took it upon himself to safely see me as far as he could, and purposely altered his demeanor and behavior to put me at ease to do so. Yes, I relied heavily on stereotyping -- both as a preliminary for my own safety as well as a guide for how to asses and handle my circumstance. But that's what it took in order for me to be safe and for a kind stranger to help me feel safe while he provided a buffer. Everyone, what bothers you about this entire picture? How many things about it bother you? Worse yet, how many can relate with this story? I just want to give a shout out to this gentleman who was a personal hero to me this day. You've restored a bit of my faith in humanity. You've shown me that there are people out there who hear our cries and see our struggle -- whatever they may be. You've proven people can understand and be conscientious of others. You've reminded me that there truly are good and decent people who do the right or considerate thing just because that's what they do. I hereby dub thee Sir Real-Man. Thank you for your kindness and empathy.

#Faith in humanity #walking home after dark #normalized terror #I didn't realize until later just how've messed up it is #people need to know this happened #it's not that people can't get it #it's that most of them WON'T #hope is out there my fellow ladies

[free-the-mages]

Dragon Age questions

!!!!!!!!!!! i was tagged by the lovely @bitchesofostwick (thank you so much!!!) and i’m not tagging anyone because i’m late to this (sorry, i didn’t do it immediately when i saw it and in my usual fashion i forgot for a few days. >_>) so i know basically everyone i would tag has already been tagged. but anyway, let’s get on with it!!

p.s. this’ll be long because i ramble. ❤️

01) favorite game of the series? i’d say inquisition, probably. i rather like the character creator and the open-world feel of it. i like the gameplay of it too. it also gets bonus points because it’s the only game i know how to mod even a little, which makes me happy because i can get characters that are 100% unique to me. :]

02) how did you discover Dragon Age? Shit, nearly a decade ago i remember finding this disc for a game called Dragon Age: Origins lying around one day. it was my brother’s and i can’t remember where he said he got it, but anyway it was damaged and wouldn’t play anyway. i didn’t give a rat’s ass about it tbh. my thoughts of it went no further. it wasn’t until about three years later that my brother bought it for the 360 and i saw him play a bit and then learned that there was a character creator and I FUCKING LIVED (AND STILL DO) for games with character creators. so my happy ass started playing!!!! (that was the very first version of my Tabris, Lark!) shortly after that i purchased it for PC and the rest is history!

03) how many times you’ve played the games? I’ve completed Origins only once. I’ve started a few playthroughs, but i’ve never gotten very far. :/ oh, and i also completed Awakening once. i’ve completed DA2 i believe twice. Again, i’ve started multiple playthroughs, just never finished them all. and basically the same for Inquisition, tbh. i’ve done one playthrough without Trespasser and one with. OR i might have just loaded up the finished save and played Trespasser when i bought it. xD in any case i’ve played each game through at least once.

04) favorite race to play as? i don’t really see it as favorites? in Inquisition i’ve technically created a couple characters for each race (except a dwarf. haven’t gotten around to making a dwarf quizzy yet) but most of them are just “throwaway” characters that i make to romance people because i want to try all the romances but i can’t make every character i create into like, a character character, that exists fully in my head and outside the game. so any characters you hear about from me are ones that have really stuck out to me in one way or another. anyway the only warden i ever made that mattered any was Lark, who is of course an elf. i like them all tbh! i was rather excited about being able to play a badass qunari chick, though! (even though my first character was a human. go figure.)

05) favorite class? mage!!!!! when first played Origins i made Lark a warrior. idk for sure why, but i think it was because i didn’t want a character in the Circle. i wanted a city elf. idk why i picked warrior over rogue though. my first Hawke was a warrior. again, idk why. my second Hawke was a mage, and I. FELL. IN. LOVE. i loved the fighting animations, i loved the spells, i just…. i loved. when i finally was able to play DAI (which was a few years after it was released) my first character was a mage. again, i loved it. however, when i went back to DAO at one point and tried being a mage i was not a fan of it. i didn’t like the way it played. BUT OVERALL my favorite is definitely mage. :]

06) do you play through the games differently or do you make the same decisions each time? the same. it might be sad and pitiful, but in-game decisions give me real-world feelings and anxiety so i just make the decisions that stay in my comfort zone. :] sometimes i’m brave and try different things, but for the most part i make the same decisions.

07) go-to adventuring group? Disclaimer: if applicable, i take my LI everywhere i go. :] i honestly try to take a variety of people because i want a balanced team as much as possible. i’m also a very casual player, so i don’t use the tactical camera or like, the behavior patterns or anything. i leave everything default. so i try to mix and match and come up with a team that i feel best compliments my character’s class/abilities or whatever, without me having to babysit them or really do any work in regards to that. that AND i like to hear the different banters tbh. when i’m picking my team sometimes i’ll stop and think, “omg, what is [character] and [character]’s relationship really like??? i never take them together so i don’t know!!” so i’ll expand my horizons and take groups of companions that i don’t normally take together. that being said, I LOVE ALL THE COMPANIONS ALL THE TIME SO I DON’T PLAY FAVORITES. :]

08) which of your characters did you put the most thought into? Probably Sydnie, because she was the first game character that really developed into an OC. the first one i really wanted to try writing for. my first Inquisitor. :] she was the first (game) character that, as i was playing, i really sat and thought, “what would this living being with a soul do when presented with this situation?” instead of just clicking whatever. xD anyway, ideas just came flying at me when i thought about her. overall i feel like she’s very underdeveloped still as far as character’s go, but i love her and i’ve been thinking a lot more about her lately. i’d really love to finish writing something for her eventually. xD

09) favorite romance? oh man, idk. tbh i’ve not finished all of the romances so a part of me wants to be like, “i can’t really answer this tbh”. Lark romanced Alistair, and it was cute and i love them. (i’ve toyed with the idea of writing some stuff for them and it’d be so cute if i could actually get my ass into gear.) i really liked Fenris’s romance (and DA2 was the only game that i played through more than one companion’s romance.) and Cullen is the only one i’ve completed a romance for in DAI, though i played most of Josie’s and i’m love. :] honestly i really do feel like there really isn’t an answer from me for this one. sorry! D:

10) have you read any of the comics/books? nope. i was thinking of maybe getting The Masked Empire but i haven’t fully decided yet. i unfortunately don’t read books much these days. (i’d rather be on my comp playing games or arting or maybe reading fic!!)

11) if you read them, which was your favorite book? n/a

12) favorite DLCs? i am so fucking ambivalent wtf. seriously, people. i’m coming to learn that there are few things i have an actual feelings on either way. -___- Trespasser is the only big DLC i own and i fucking hate it. it’s great and all but i kind of cried at the end so whatever. :] but honestly i really really like the Spoils of the Qunari DLC!!!!! the antaam-saar!!!!!! (i think i spelled it right idk i’m too lazy to check please forgive me) and the mount!!!!! good stuff. i own (i think) all of the DLC for DA2 and i like them all well enough. i also own all for DAO and i like them well enough. i’ve only ever played the DAO in-game DLC as well as Awakening (meaning no Leli’s Song, no Witch Hunt, etc.) i just never got around to it. anyway, really. not really playing favorites here either. xD

13) things that annoy you. not much tbh. i suppose it’s annoying that sometimes in some games i’m sitting here like, “okay, why did my character just say these words? that wasn’t what the words that i clicked on said. ?????????”

14) Orlais or Ferelden? Ferelden! because it’s more rustic and i like that. :3 also mabaris.

15) templars or mages? mages. though i do believe there’s an argument to be had about the treatment of both groups at the hands of the chantry. but still mages. :]

16) if you have multiple characters, are they in different/parallel universes or in the same one? obviously i intend to have and OC HOF, champion, and inquisitor all in one universe. i’ve had a hard time trying to figure out which characters i want to be canon and which aren’t. i’ve also toyed with the idea of having multiple world states that act as their own individual canons, but that’s a lot of work and like… lazy. :] for a while i just figured Lark was my canon warden no canon Hawke thus far and Sydnie my canon Inquisitor. but idk.

17) what did you name your pets? (mabari, summoned animals, mounts, etc) UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM………………….. one of the mabaris in the first two games was named Charlemagne (i think my Hawke’s dogs are always Charlemagne) and i think Lark’s dog was… omg hold on i have it documented somewhere. *a few minutes later* Shawshank! Lark’s dog’s name is Shawshank.

18) have you installed any mods? yes because i’m garbage that is privileged enough to be a computer gamer and can install mods. i also really like having mods and making mods so yes. yes i install mods. :]

19) did your Warden want to become a Grey Warden? not particularly, though she didn’t mind having to leave the alienage. she’d be dead or worse if she’d stayed and also she would have attempted to run away long before shit hit the fan if she didn’t have her family to think about. she still cared for her family and she did feel some sadness over leaving them, but it was like her soul made a sigh of relief and a weight was lifted. she was truly happy to leave. becoming a Grey Warden was sort of like a not completely unpleasant side effect.

20) hawke’s personality? i don’t really have a Hawke atm but I generally tend to play blue Hawkes.

21) did you make matching armor for your companions in Inquisition? no and they should all thank the maker because every fucking one of ‘em would be in plaidweave and that’s that on that.

22) if your character(s) could go back in time to change one thing, what would they change? ugh this is too much thinking for me. why are there so many questions?!??!?!!? anyway idk. i think Sydnie would change the way she let herself react to a really bad thing that happened in the circle. because she reacted the way she did, it completely changed who she was and it takes her a long time to get herself back. sorry it’s vague but that’s just how these things go sometimes. :] Lark doesn’t really live in the past, if that makes sense? she doesn’t dwell on things enough to regret. why change the past when you can own this day???? as a certain cheeky lesbian elf apparently says maybe. :3

23) do you have any headcanons about your character(s) that go against canon? kind of, but mostly small things, and generally only things that pertain directly to my character. also i like to switch things up when it comes to romances. :] i try to take the basics of the in-game romance arc and tailor it a bit more to what i envision. or just what i want. ;D so i guess that could maybe be considered off canon, though i don’t really see the romances as canon anyway.

24) are any of your character(s) based on someone? no. not intentionally, anyway. it would take me way too long to explain my thought processes when it comes to creating characters (and this bitch is already long enough at this point) so i won’t go into details. :] so basically no, i don’t ever really set out to base characters on people. maybe subconsciously it happens? idk.

25) who did you leave in the Fade? my first playthrough was the default world state so i sacrificed Stroud because of course i did. with the custom world state i have now i sacrificed Hawke. D: because you know i’m not sacrificing Alistair!!!! especially not after he said the stuff about Lark and them being together AND I COULDN’T TAKE THAT AWAY. also it wasn’t like it was MY Hawke, because i don’t have an actual OC Hawke it was quite easy to sacrifice her because i had no real attachment to her. anyway don’t fucking ask me who i’ll sacrifice when i finally get around to actually deciding on my canons and their world state because I DON’T KNOW AND I DON’T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT. thank you. :]

26) favorite mount? i don’t use mounts much actually. i like hearing banter. that being said, i really like the way the qunari horse looks. i also like the harts and i don’t care what anyone else says i love their nails-on-chalkboard screech. fight me if you must but i said what i said. :]

THANKS SO MUCH TO ANYONE WHO READS THIS I APPRECIATE YOU LETTING ME WASTE YOUR TIME!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️

#i don't remember my tags for things like this #oc memes #? #i think that's the tag #or.... #oc meme #maybe #idkkkk #i give up #i used a lot of energy just answering these questions so #yeah #:]

[jessicaingo]

“He Hit Me & It Felt Like A Kiss”

“He hurt me but it felt like true love, Loving him was never enough”

December 13th,2020

When I first heard these Lana Del Ray lyrics, I felt like I had written them myself. It opened my eyes to how I really wasn't the only person who's ever dealt with a toxic relationship before. Unless you've experienced one yourself, You can never truly understand. Ive lost countless amounts of friends due to the fact I chose to continue to be manipulated & never give up on the “true love” I thought I had for my sons father. In their eyes, I was stupid. “All you do is complain! We have told you time & time again” I understood their position then, just like I do now. I get it. BUT I couldn't help my heart. My love for my sons father was like a DRUG. It was an ADDICTION & I WAS OBSESSED. Just like any addiction, you aren't ready to quit until YOU choose to. You can realize the issue is present but sometimes that's not enough. You can't make a life change until YOU & ONLY YOU are ready to. No ones opinion or good advice can help. What DID help me were the friends who were CONSTANTLY there. Supporting me & loving me with no questions asked. Not the ones who gave me ultimatums. “You choose our friendship or him. I’m sorry but I just can't stand by your side with all this drama & you never taking my advice. I don't want to see you hurt anymore” All valid statements.. but It wasn't what helped me get through the abuse. All it did was make me feel like more of a failure. Like I was disappointing everyone in my life who I cared about the most. So I’m grateful for the ones who actually stayed though out the years ALWAYS being a shoulder for me to cry on while I tried to make sense of it all. I know my children & my happiness now days truly make my loved ones FULL of joy. My success & happiness is not just my own, its because of my dear loved ones who helped give me strength. 

But lets go back to the beginning. Back to the start when this abuse all started. Keep in mind, this is the short version. I’ll be going into further detail in my future posts.

I met my sons father in 2015 when I started dating him. Through out the years, I’ve seen all his sides. The good, the bad & everything in between. 

The first time he physically abused me was in Oregon December 2016 at his parents home while celebrating the holidays. His brother & parents witnessed the attack. During that visit, I had become pregnant. In these months awaiting for our first to be born, he did nothing to change his way of life. I gave birth to our first child in October, 2017. Only a couple weeks later, I got a call late at night from an officer who arrested him for a DUI. I had to put my 3 week old son in the car & pick him up from jail. At that time, we both had our own apartments & were not living together. 

After picking him up from jail, I dropped him off at his place. He verbally abused me the entire ride. Never gave me apologizes for having to wake up our baby to come get him. Instead he blamed ME. Blamed me for being the reason why he was driving under the influence. In reality, I had no idea where he was that night. The last text he sent me was he was working late. Keep in mind, he never was around to help me with our son. (I’ll be going into details in a separate post)       I should’ve opened my eyes that night to the fact he was not sympathetic & probably would never change his ways. Instead, I gave him an ultimatum. I told him if he wanted to be a father, he needed to start acting like one. Enough of the cheating, the lies, the alcohol, the drugs. My sons father made a promise he had no intentions on keeping to me as we moved in together. 

Only a couple short weeks after moving in, was the second physically abusive incident. December 2017, This one was the worst. It resulted in me getting the police involved because I was locked away from our two month old son. When the officers arrived, they noticed marks around my neck. I gave them a short statement of what happened but only begged for someone to go into the home to get my son. I never wanted to press charges against him however, the state realized how terrible this behavior was & got involved. This is the case that resulted him being on probation currently. He still blames his probation on me for being the one who got the police involved that night. He never once apologized, even when he saw all the marks & bruises. To this day, he denies ever putting his hands on me in an aggressive way that caused me to loose consciousness.

After getting his DUI, My sons father had to get a Breathalyzer in his car. All that stopped him from doing was from driving HIS car. On nights he wouldn’t come home, I would wake up the next day to see he had taken MY car in the middle of the night so he could continue to drive under the influence. Sometimes he would not bring back my car for days. Once when he did this & I noticed my car was gone, I started to text as well as call him. I tried to explain exactly why I needed my car back so badly. I only had enough formula for the baby to get me through the night & I was planing on going to the store to buy more in the morning. Him taking my car that night kept me from easily being able to provide for our child. He didn’t care. Told me to “Go Puff” deliver some formula & he blocked my number. The next day, he arrived back wasted with my car & holding a bag of mccdonalds. This was when incident three happened. I was vivid. I start yelling, trying to get him to understand why I was so upset. I wanted him to understand how his behavior was poorly effecting not just my life emotionally but his sons as well. He laughed, called me dramatic & threw the bag of mcdonalds at me. As I was angry, I threw it back & told him I didn’t want mcdonalds. I wanted formula for our son... That upset him. His eyes filled with rage & I knew it was too late for me to back down or give him an apology. He grabbed me, started punching me in the head repeating the words “Why won’t you just die already? JUST DIE”. I started to crawl away from him, stood up, woke my son up who was still asleep in his crib. I put my shoes on & left for the store to buy formula. As I’m driving in tears I realized how dizzy I was. I noticed an urgent care next to the grocery store. I went inside & that incident was reported with a doctor. The Scottsdale Police showed up at our home. My sons father automatically thought I had called them. As soon as they left, so did he & I didn’t see him again for weeks. (This is what sparked my first post in October 2018)

After him having little contact with me over those weeks, he showed up at 7:00am on October 5th 2018. It was our sons first birthday & our baby was still asleep in his crib. When he arrived, it scared me. I was not expecting him. I explained I had made plans & was taking our son to go to the zoo for his birthday. I then got up to get ready for the day, as he grabbed me. He told me since our son was still sleeping, we had time... he then forced himself on me while I screamed & cried... A couple weeks later, I found out I was pregnant with our second. My sons father disappeared once again. He had found comfort in a young girl who is born in 2001. At the time, it was just an affair. He eventually came back home December 2018 giving me the same false promises, yet I gave him another chance. I wanted to give him one last opportunity to be a father to my children.

I gave birth to our second in 2019. Brad never changed his ways. I went into labor one week early due to stress. On June 22nd at 2am, I called him trying to let him know I wasn’t feeling well. Brad was out partying, he answered telling me I was “Annoying him & to F- off”... a couple hours later, he finally came home. I went into labor almost immediately after his arrival. Since he was still intoxicated & I had to drive myself while having contractions to the hospital.

A couple months after our second son was born, “we” bought a house & moved into our “Forever Home”. This is when incident four happened. I found out that he in fact, never ended his relationship with his young companion. I should’ve known what his reaction would be if I confronted him. He got aggressive, grabbed me & threw me out of the house. I snuck back inside to get our children. He told me to leave, take the children & go live with my mom in Atlanta, GA. I had to leave everything I ever owned behind, only taking our children & whatever was in my diaper bag.. This was truly the most traumatizing abuse of them all... but it was also the LAST TIME he ever physically touched me. Now days, I find a lot of comfort in knowing that was the LAST TIME. Everyone knows I would've stuck by my sons father through out anything, until the day I died. If he didn't kick me out, I would've never left. 

In my first post back in 2018 I even said “I’ll give him a big THANK YOU. THANK YOU for LEAVING ME. THANK YOU FOR FINALLY DOING WHAT I NEVER HAD THE STRENGTH TO DO.” When I said that, I really had thought he left us for good.. but I took him back always praying one day he would love me like I loved him. I now stand by that statement & truly give him a BIG THANK YOU FOR KICKING ME OUT!

Over a year since this incident, I can TRULY say I’VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER.

This was my path all along. My children & I are EXACTLY where we are supposed to be & so is my sons father.

xoxo 

[pernatius]

Lost in Space Part 4: Ch 2

Ch 1

Summary: Having lost Earth, an unnamed Space Explorer is haunted by a mysterious, black figure as she begins to drift away from those closest to her. 

Part 1: ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5

Part 2: ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5

Part 3: ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5

————————

It was creaky, especially from S1Y’s footsteps, which didn’t help the uneasiness. It was long, which didn’t help it either. Although, that didn’t surprise me. What does surprise me is the sight we get to see. As the higher we went up the staircase, the less dense the steam became. This not only meant it got cooler but we were able to see the mountain’s dark, muddy color slowly become vibrant. A bright, rich green began to spring up all over the mountain. While the mountain is mostly green it’s not entirely green. Hints of pinks and yellows popped now and again between the luscious green sea. About twenty steps before we hit the village’s entrance a gust of wind slides between us and hits the mountain, causing the grass and flowers to sway, almost dancing, against it. 

Two trees with fruits the size of my head greeted us. Their roots created an arch and on the other side of it sat S1Y’s village. I’m not sure who’s stomach growled. It could’ve been mine because it sounded close or it could’ve been all of us besides our new robot companion. Whatever the case it gets him to conclude, “So, that is why you all came here. People rarely come to our planet.”

“After what we faced, I don’t blame them,” Ashley commented with her arms crossed. 

Our robot companion transforms his hand into a small blaster and once he does, turns his attention to one of the trees overhead. Taking a knee and squinting one of his eyes, he shoots. It’s one big flash that causes my eyes to become blinded for a split second. It must’ve been what he used to kill off that serpent. 

Picking them up, between the bits of branches and leaves he accidentally took out as well, he hands them to us. The three of us inspect them quietly. Skeema, however, takes the opposite approach. His nostrils flare as he sniffs it. It’s loud, which breaks our silence and has us look at him. When he takes a small bite, I watch its juices squirt out and land on some of his furs. We continue watching him as he slowly chews until he eventually swallows it down. When he does, he turns to us, “It’s good, if that’s what you three are about to ask.”

Mikrovos is the first one to finish, followed by Ashley. The third is Skeema. I’m last, but I’m not quite done. I’m a little more than halfway done. So, I hold it in my hand as our guide shows us around his village, which is just several huts made from dead trees. They’re similar to Skeema’s, but better crafted. Their material differed from each other as it was obvious a single hut was created using different trees, yet their parts fit perfectly with one another. Maybe this is kind of a case of reverse speciesism to stereotype this, but it’s probably because they were created from robots. While S1Y continues to talk about his village and random, spotty memories my mind drifts off into thinking about Khavas. The last time I saw him he didn’t act like the Khavas I knew. Sure, I didn’t know him for long, but I just know that wasn’t him. 

In the corner of my eye S1Y’s people got out from their huts. They smiled and said their hellos. A handful waved at us. A few got out and played wooden instruments like flutes and drums and began to play. The rest headed towards us and asked questions. The three answered without hesitation. Well, all but Ashley answered them smoothly. Mikrovos and Skeema stumbled over their words, but the latter was distracted by a feminine robot pressing her chest against his arm. I get asked too, but I’m focused on the ghostly figure of Khavas. From between two huts, he looks straight at me but stares blankly. Like he was empty. Like he was dead. The last thing I’m able to hear is S1Y explaining, “Sorry. We just get excited about meeting off-worlders.” 

Soon everyone but Khavas fades out from my sight. He takes a step towards me. It should’ve taken several but he gets in front of me before I could blink. I dropped my half-eaten fruit. I’m not scared. I know I shouldn’t be because I know this is all in my head, but I still feel something. I feel sympathetic. Maybe I feel empathetic too as we remain looking into each other’s eyes. I don’t know what he sees in mine, but in his, I see a story I have yet to make of. It’s blurry. It’s fast. As strange as it is, I reach out towards his face. I want to hold it. With him huffing a dense, black smoke is blown out of his nostrils. I cover my face and when I lower my arms I see that black figure again. Still and unlike those other times, I don’t feel fear. Instead, curiosity and bits of heartbreak boil within me, causing me to open my mouth. I’m about to ask it, but the emotions overwhelm me. They explode. I stop myself before I get the chance. 

We’re all sitting on the ground. Ashley is sitting far from me, which hurts. It kind of ticked me off too, but I guess I can’t make her sit with me. I’m just not in the right position. At least Mikrovos is sitting on one side of me and Skeema is sitting on the other. Speaking of Skeema, he’s at least having a way better time than me with that same robot from earlier as they flirt with each other, which of course has to include tons of smiling and laughing. 

Looking at S1Y, Mikrovos asks, “So, your people were created by the previous civilization that was here?” 

“Mhm. Unfortunately, they’re long gone.” S1Y and the rest of the villagers, except Skeema’s companion, lower their heads. 

“I just learned about your planet, but if I knew anything else about this planet, especially about your creators I wouldn’t hesitate to share.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s nothing compared to all the good you’ve done for us so far. Besides, I think the four of us can agree that this is the most welcomed we’ve felt in a while.”

“As thankful as we are about your arrival, you should be thankful you landed on our planet. Things are getting heated out there.”

Ashley enters into their conversation, “What do you mean?”

“You haven’t heard? Another war has recently started between the Space Pirates. Several planets have already joined in.”

“It’s barely been two decades since the first one,” Mikrovos crossed his arms, “I have a feeling this is Syco’s doing.”

“Syco? Is he like you? Is he a Tauvox?”

He hesitates for a moment. “Yeah. He is my-No. He was my superior. He’s the new commander of the Tauvox Space Pirates.”

“Then, yes, I think he’s the one that started it. Well, he and a Virmus. At first, we were confused and some of us were scared why a Tauvox and Virmus came here with two humans.”

“Neither of us are Space Pirates anymore, especially in those factions.”

“That’s good to hear. I heard being a Space Pirate is a tough and dangerous business practice.”

Mikrovos looks at Skeema, wanting him to pitch in his experience, but because he’s busy flirting Mikrovos speaks for the both of them. “Yeah, it was,” he looks away from the robot and has his eyes drifting towards one of the trees between a few huts, “But, Syco, what does he think he’s doing? The first war is what killed our planet. Hundreds of other homeworlds died. Now he wants to add to those numbers?”

I look at him. “Wait. I thought it was because of a civil war.”

“Yes, but there’s a bit more to it than that. The civil war started because the leaders of our planet were divided on whether to help the Space Pirates in our solar system or not. They continuously aided us by helping us export off-world and bring us imports from other worlds, helping us trade. However, helping them would mean a large portion of our population, too many I have to add, would join in a war that wasn’t our fight. It started with Space Pirates and it ended with Space Pirates, but now it’s starting again with Space Pirates.”

“Wait. Two decades ago? Was that the reason Earth was getting invaded? The first time I mean.”

“By that point, the war was almost over. I might be wrong, but I think they invaded Earth because they needed a new homeworld. Earth must’ve been the closest, habitable planet with life forms that wouldn’t pick much of a fight. Good for them because their resources must’ve been low. Bad for you for obvious reasons. Most of their records were destroyed along with their ship, so don’t make this assumption as fact.”

I imagine myself as a child in the middle of a field of crops. Everything is on fire. She screams. My mother, or at least I think that’s her, calls out to me. She begs for me to help her. I don’t know where she is. I can’t see her, but she sounds close. It’s like she’s in front of me. Because of this, I step back and cover my mouth as I cry. It’s all I can do, or at least that’s all I think I can do. I shut my eyes. When I reopen them, I’m back on the ship. Still crying, I watch Earth grow smaller and smaller, but I still hear her. I’m still haunted by her.  

“We can’t just let them do this again. I can’t just sit here and let them do what caused the deaths of millions of humans. I have to do something.”

“Like what,” Ashley questioned. The look on my face has her to explain, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for that to come out that way, but there’s nothing we can do about it. I don’t like this as much as you, but this isn’t some fictional book where one of us can wave our hand and magically stop it. This is real life and we’re only human. Well, two of us are, but it’s not like anyone else here can do that much better. Look, I lost you once and I almost lost you again. I’m not going to let you get into any more danger, especially not when Syco is involved.”

“Oh, so now you care about me?” It slipped out. I regretted it as soon as it came out of my mouth, but I just had to get it out. 

“What are you talking about? I constantly worry about and care for you.” 

“Are you sure because recently it doesn’t feel that way? You haven’t looked or talked to me and have kept your distance since Syco took Earth until now.” My heart raced because of my rising anger.  

It’s like someone else took over. I’ve been wanting to say these things, yes, but I don’t want to say them like this, especially not in front of everyone. Mikrovos and Skeema know this because of the way they look at me. They know this isn’t me. So, Mikrovos tries calming me down by motioning me to stop. 

“It’s because there’s been a lot going on. We lost Earth and now Saamuki.”

“Saamuki? Why do you care about Saamuki?”

“Why do I care about Saamuki? Saamuki is my friend. She’s also someone that Mikrovos, my other friend, really cares about.” Ashley is getting angry too. S1Y catches this, the stuffy atmosphere created because of the tension between us, so he tries laughing this off. He tries to change the subject, but I cut him off. 

“No, this has never been about Saamuki or Mikrovos. This isn’t even about Earth. This is about me.”

“You? Why would it-”

“You’re mad at me aren’t you? You’re mad that it’s because of me our planet is gone. You’re mad that it’s because of me I took away the only home you’ve ever known. No, it’s all because of me you’re even in this mess.”

“I was never mad at you about that, but I am about this. When are you ever going to stop making things about yourself? When are you ever going to grow up?”

With that, we all became silent. The look on her face, as angry as she is, shows that she regrets what she said. So, she tries to apologize, but I cut her off again, “No, you’re right. When am I ever going to grow up?”

#195 #lost in space #writers #writeblr #creative writing #spilled ink #wlw #ficiton #space

[serendipitousoracle]

Soveliss, 3, 8, 18, 19, 29, 39?

precious warlock boy

3. How do they position themselves in a group? Do they like to be the center of attention, or do they hang back at the edges of a crowd?

Soveliss generally likes to put himself in the middle of his group, at least where there’s a threat of combat. Previously, Soveliss would have been very inclined to stand attentive at the front of the group to ward off his more impulsive companions, but currently he is more likely to hover closely to the side of his lone surviving friend and quietly snark from off to the side (he’s grieving and working at the same time it’s a bad time). If it’s a faith- or death-related matter he’s likely to take charge.

8. Where and when do they seem most and least at ease? Why? How can you tell?

There are probably two places, at present, where Soveliss would be most at ease: in the presence of his patron, and alone in downtime with the aforementioned remaining friend, @mossandrock’s Grulka. Following that would be meditation in sacred spaces, and then perhaps relaxed taverns, doing his own thing. Currently the places where he’d be the least at ease are anywhere with undead, or being deep in a swamp (whoops).

Soveliss at ease has lax shoulders, soft expressions, may be leaning on his quarterstaff or against a person he likes, and tends to space out fixed on one spot of interest. If there’s music or singing, he’ll quietly tap something along with it.

A tense Soveliss keeps a guarded stance/posture, one hand on the quarterstaff and the other ready to cast. His eyes are hard and his body language closes off. He is much more given to snark and his priorities typically become much more external/selfless.

18. What kind of person could they become in the future? What are some developmental paths that they could take, (best, worst, most likely?) what would cause them to come to pass, and what consequences might they have? What paths would you especially like to see, and why?

hoo boy– readmore here for length

Best: Soveliss finds an equilibrium between his patron and his god, and becomes… probably like a Warlock/Cleric Doomguide of Kelemvor. He comes to be at peace with the deaths of those he’s loved and visits their resting places in his travels where he can, honoring their memories as best he can and filling them in on what they’ve “missed.” He finds at least one mortal person with whom he can form some sort of significant long-term relationship without being afraid of death or sudden tragedy. He rebuilds the Daggerdale Monastery of Kelemvor, and eventually goes to serve proudly in the city of the dead as one of Kelemvor’s highly faithful deceased heroes.

Worst: Grulka dies suddenly and not long after Erquen, Soveliss BSODs and shuts down. He does not entirely recover, and becomes extremely closed off to other people, excepting only his patron (everyone else might just die on him too if he dares get attached). If he is not also murdered by @aubergion anticlimatically as revenge for my incessant snark, then he essentially Hardens and potentially becomes Faithless. He fights and wanders restlessly until he dies, and cannot muster words as the god he once worshiped judges him, and cannot give him any mercy. He spends the afterlife being slowly dissolved on the Wall of the Faithless, until either he is finally gone or stolen by demons, at which point it potentially loops back around to Fun if I get to play a lawful evil, possibly-amnesiac demon!Sov :P

Most Likely: hard to say, for a D&D character. so much is literally up to the roll of the dice. If Sov stagnated character-wise, he’d end up a powerful warlock with a conflict between seemingly silent faith and a very present patron. He’d bounce back from the death of his friend but still be a bit fragile about potential deaths to come. All kinda depends on what gets thrown at him and how well we make choices and then roll to act on them (and, as i’m sure aub will remind us for years to come, remember to use class abilities)

Personally I could probably enjoy any of these arcs as long as something actually happens to Soveliss before he dies; I have reasonable faith to aub in this regard, even if my default is very low expectations from previous games.

19. How do they behave within a group? What role(s) do they take? Does this differ if they know and trust the group, versus finding themselves in a group of strangers? Why?

Soveliss is the occasional-voice, an attempted diplomat (to which the party might disagree BUT HE’S HAVING A REAL BAD TIME GUYS), and used to get stuck reviving people but our party appears to be moving away from that. He should probably be a bit more assertive than I play him but I have trouble speaking over people. This definitely varies with groups; he is much more patient, tolerant, and forgiving with people he knows over strangers, and his priorities will skew towards people he knows and likes over people he does not in situations of roughly equivalent need (see: will run off after a giant frog who has a dear friend rather than help a new arrival he finds somewhat irritating who is getting their leg eaten). Soveliss is very attachment-starved due to being Raised By Literal Ghosts, who were many and certainly cared about him, but were extremely limited in the ways they could express this or care for him– as a result, he will direly try to protect any closeness he has, and is vulnerable to having that closeness abused (I once pondered aloud to Moss that Soveliss’ patron could practically croon at him like a darling pet and Soveliss would still preen happily because he is extremely sheltered and desperate for affection, along with having next to no references for healthy relationships).

29. What kind of activities, interests, and hobbies do they have? What significance and impact do these have in their lives, both positive and negative?

Soveliss is very interested in magic– it is that gift from his patron that enabled him to leave the haunted monastery he thought might be his own tomb one day. His first reaction to seeing an ancient temple of a Good god(’s split-off cult) defiled with gruesome blood runes was “holy shit this is awful” and then “where is my pen i need to copy these down.” He’s also a bit of a language nerd (he learned draconic from old books in the monastery for fun), and otherwise he is still learning things that he might like to pick up. (I could see him enjoying alchemy after our first adventure, even if that is also a bit bittersweet now.)

39. What sort of questions or thoughts recur in their lives, either specifically or as a theme? Why are these never answered, or answered permanently to their satisfaction?

This is also hard to answer for a D&D question, so I am going to kind of omit the End Outcome-type things.

Soveliss wants to know what happened to his monastery. As he remembers it, he was put down for a nap (hidden, protected, saved), and woke up to……. he can’t remember, now (doesn’t want to), but everyone was dead. Ghosts. He wants to know how they died (they would not tell him, he didn’t dare ask), why they died, and why they never moved onto the afterlife. He fears they are suffering.

Soveliss also wants to know more about his archfey patron; as it stands, he knows his patron’s name, and that his patron had an inexplicable interest in seducing him and offering him a pact. That’s about it. He knows nothing about his patron’s title and likely very little if anything about what domain/s his patron actually rules over. He especially would like to know what his patron actually wants with him. As horribly infatuated and attracted to his patron as he is… this is a gift, it comes with a price– who is the lamb and who is the knife? (might as well face it you’re addicted to love.)

And then, finally, a thought that I am starting to think might become Character/Arc words for Sov though of course I cannot guarantee anything for a D&D campaign: “Death is necessary, but rarely kind.”

#oracleanswers #Soveliss Liadon #daydreamingofdragons #. #.. #did i say i was working on my papers i meant 'procrastinating and crying' #also whoops f+tm song lyrics ahoy

[heyitsdoe]

Perhaps We'll Meet Another Day | One Piece | #35 - Somebody I Once Knew

Words: 7.0k

<- Chapter 34

WARNINGS: Character death

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Brittany..." Lexi started quietly, taking a few steps forward as if approaching a dangerous animal, "what happened?"

She looked down at herself with a sigh, eyes tired. "Let me get this stuff off me first, please. I've been walking in it for like an hour."

Without so much as a word of explanation, the woman unceremoniously set the three bags on the ground and left the room with three water bottles from her group's box. Well...now just her box, Lexi thought to herself morosely. It left her with an uneasy, tight feeling in her chest.

She stared down at the packs on the ground, recognizing them as Candice's and Natalya's. One of the straps was frayed and nearly ripped off from where it had been sewed into the back, dangling by several threads. That hadn't been there before they'd left on their mission this morning.

They were also flecked with blood of both black and red, but these clues didn't really tell the brunette anything about the events that had taken place. All they had to go on was what Brittany eventually told them, unfortunately.

Law's group grew eerily quiet while the other woman was away. They didn't like the reminder that going out there could mean their deaths, and they were all trying to process the fact that the two other women they'd been hanging around with were just suddenly gone. They may not have trusted them entirely, but they were still people. To know that two lives were just snuffed out...

"I can't believe they're gone." Shachi muttered unemotionally, still trying to wrap his brain around it.

Penguin let out a breath. "That's the world as it is now, I guess...never know when you'll see someone for the last time."

"She just lost her whole group. I wonder what Brittany is feeling right now." The redhead went on to say.

Law scoffed under his breath, but no one remarked on it. Clearly, they didn't need to ask to know what he thought. Without much else to say, they descended into another silence.

She emerged from down the hallway about ten minutes later, her skin devoid of any remnants of blood. Her clothes were a different issue, and would probably never really be clean again. The unfortunate effect of not being able to do laundry anymore. She sat down next to the bags and looked around at the others.

"Candice and Natalya are dead. I'm sure you've gathered that." She spoke blandly, as if she'd distanced herself from the truth. "They were eaten."

"What happened?" Lexi urged, not liking how unemotional she sounded when it came to the loss of her two friends.

Brittany crossed her arms and leaned back against the way. "We went to a hardware store I saw when you and I got all that water. Thought there might be something useful inside. Maybe some propane or something.

"We searched around a bit but didn't find much. Then we found this locked door, and Candice thought it would have good stuff on the inside that others couldn't get to. We used some of the metal shelving to break it open, but there were a ton of zombies on the inside instead."

She shook her head. "We'd broken the lock and knob, so the door wouldn't shut. We ran out as fast as we could, but there were a lot of them. Candice got caught, and when Natalya went back to try to save her, she got bitten too. The only thing I could do was run. They were being torn apart behind me, there was nothing I could do."

"Jeez, Brittany..." Penguin started, shaking his own head sadly. "That's terrible."

Lexi glanced at Shachi and saw a similar sympathetic expression. They believed her. But part of Lexi was still wondering how she managed to come back with all three bags. That scenario didn't leave room for explanation.

Law must have been thinking the same thing, because he pointed to the bags beside her. "How'd you retrieve their packs?"

Brittany glanced their way, then shrugged. "I was already holding them when we had to go. They gave them to me before trying to break open the door. I didn't have time to give it back to them after that."

"Hmm." Law hummed, not sure whether to believe it or not. He decided that questioning her further wouldn't get him any further, so he dropped it. If she was lying, she'd just continue to lie. But he would certainly be keeping a closer eye on her than he had before. There was no way he'd trust her alone with any of his people from this point forward.

Lexi's own mind was working overdrive, trying to fit all the pieces of her story together. She supposed it was possible. Law's group had often found hidden pockets of zombies in buildings, despite having no idea how they'd gotten like that. And they too had been chased out from where they'd tried to search. None of that sounded unrealistic. The rest seemed plausible, but something still didn't feel right to her. She couldn't put it to any one thing, though.

Brittany looked tired, but not necessarily all that upset to have just lost her two companions. But maybe she'd become so used to loss, that it no longer registered properly. This world could definitely change you emotionally in negative ways. Maybe this was just the result of years of living in life-or-death situations.

Maybe Brittany was lying to them. Or maybe Lexi was just being paranoid.

She felt terrible that her friend had just gone through something horrifying. Lexi wanted to sympathize like she had when they had cried over the passing of Brittany's favorite uncle, or her break up with the one boy she'd actually genuinely seemed to love. Lexi had always been the more emotionally charged between the two, often crying during those heartfelt hallmark movies or anything that had a dog in it.

However, the logical part of her brain told her to reign it in because something felt off, her instincts nudged at her thoughts that something wasn't right, but her emotional side wanted to sit next to Brittany and offer her a shoulder to lean on. The mental tug-of-war was confusing and exhausting.

"I'd like to rest a bit if you don't mind. Sorry to kick you out of the room, but I'm fucking tired after today..." Brittany said, rubbing at her eyes. "I'm sure you understand."

"Of course." Law replied shortly, catching his group's eye and nodded towards the stairway. "Let's go."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't believe a word that came out of her mouth." Law declared quietly, sitting cross-legged on the floor next to his sleeping space. The others were in a similar position, facing him in a sort-of circle in front of him. "It all sounds plausible, but she seems to be hiding something."

"I mean...we don't have anything else to go off of but her word." Shachi shrugged, neither siding with or against what he'd said. He simply didn't know what to believe.

"Penguin, what do you think?" Law questioned, crossing his arms. He wanted to hear everyone's opinions.

"Hard to say..." He took off his hat for a second, smoothing down his rumpled hair before replacing it. "As far as we know, she hasn't lied to us before this. Is there any reason we should doubt her now?"

None of them really offered up an answer to that, but Law noticed Lexi kept her eyes on the stairwell, lost in thought.

"It's one of those things I can't explain, but I feel we shouldn't trust her." Law went on to say.

"Gut feeling?" Shachi asked, and their leader nodded. "Well, I think we've learned by now that you're rarely wrong with those. Maybe she is dangerous. After today, maybe it would be a good precaution to see her that way."

"What reason would she have to kill her friends though? It doesn't make sense. Why get rid of people who help you?" Penguin pursed his lips, shaking his head in confusion.

Law noticed Lexi's wince, and the way she lowered her head. He wondered what she was thinking, but turned to Penguin instead. "Like I said, Natalya mentioned that there was still some distrust between them. Perhaps it just came to a head."

Shachi rubbed at his chin in thought. "Maybe...if so, we'll definitely need to keep a watch on her."

"Unless you already have an idea?" Penguin guessed, seeing Law's expression.

He nodded. "We should pack our things tonight and relocate in the morning."

"Already?" Shachi questioned. "We only just decided this morning, and we haven't gone looking for a good place yet. We'd be searching blind."

"It no longer feels safe here with her around. Anything would be better at this point. We should act now while we have the chance, before something happens that gets someone hurt or worse. We don't have enough time to leave today before it gets dark, but we should go at first light tomorrow." Law recommended, watching everyone else's expression. Lexi was still looking towards the stairwell and hadn't said anything yet. He sighed. "Lexi, what are your thoughts? You're part of the discussion as well."

She let out a breath, and spared him a quick glance. "I've been listening. And I'm fine with leaving, just...a lot on my mind right now, sorry."

He understood she was probably struggling to accept the fact that her friend may still be a cold blooded killer, but Law had no such problems. He nodded, accepting that everyone else was on board. "We don't have much, but make sure everything is compact and easy to move. We aren't making a return trip for more stuff."

"What about the water?" Shachi asked, sticking a thumb towards the 3 packs of water they still had. "I'm not sure we'll be able to take those with us in addition to the food."

Law chewed the inside of his lip, trying to figure out what they should do. "Load what you can into the box of food, see how heavy it is. We could have two people carry it between them while the other two watch for danger. The rest we will probably have to leave behind."

They all began the process of packing what little they had taken out of their packs since settling here. Other than a blanket and some food and water, they wouldn't need anything else for the rest of the day or the next morning. They tried to make things quiet, not wanting to wake up Brittany and have her suspect something was going on. Having her walk in as they were obviously putting things together to leave would be an awkward conversation.

Law had Shachi and Penguin sweep the upper floor one last time to see if there was anything else they missed and could bring with them. The building wasn't small and it would take them awhile, leaving Lexi and Law by themselves once more. He didn't want to stray too far from the stairwell, in case Brittany decided to come looking for any of them or tried anything funny when she thought they weren't looking.

They searched through the desks and cubicles still left over, opening the drawers for anything that may have been forgotten or left behind by those who came before. There wasn't much but it gave them time to think while they waited for the boys to return.

Neither of them had anything to say over the course of the next hour, both painfully aware of the elephant in the room between them. Lexi would have thought that it wouldn't feel this awkward after a few days, but she'd been mistaken. She honestly felt like such a fool. Part of her just wanted Law to be a man and resolve the issue by saying something first, but that wasn't exactly fair. She was just as capable of clearing the air as he was. It all just came down to whoever was brave enough to make the first move to start the slow fix to what they had before.

The other part, the one that mainly held her back from apologizing for her awful behavior, didn't actually regret their night at all. It had been way too soon and way too fast in whatever relationship they did have going on, but in the end, she didn't mind that he'd been so eager to reciprocate her feelings. Even if he was drunk, some part of him must have thought she was attractive. That was a good sign, she supposed.

The only problem was she didn't know how to go from here.

Deciding it was a waste of her time to think about it, she stopped, shaking her head sadly and started packing the bottles of water into the food box. There was something much more sinister on her mind anyway. Something she wanted to deny but just couldn't. Her friend had lied to them all.

Did Brittany really kill her friends? Was she capable of something like that? And the part that made Lexi feel chilled to the bone was the growing suspicion that it all had to do with her. Suddenly the way her friend had looked rather thoughtful that day made eerie sense.

"So, it's because of the others that you won't come with me?"

Lexi hadn't paid her friend's words much thought until Penguin had questioned her motives earlier. Her heart had sank as the pieces were slowly falling into place. Brittany decides out of nowhere to go on a scavenge outing, and returns with all of the supplies right after Lexi rejects her offer to join because she wouldn't fit in with the group. Problem figuratively solved. There was technically nothing stopping her from joining up with her now, just as she'd wanted her to...

Oh, god...if Lexi was right, this was all her fault. Right from the beginning, she'd left her to fend for herself. She'd abandoned her best friend and hadn't looked back. She hadn't even tried to go back after the guilt kicked in the next day. Just a letter as way of goodbye, instead of facing her upfront like a decent human being.

It all compounded to this. If she had only promised Brittany she'd go with her, they'd still be alive. They wouldn't have been lured to their deaths because of what Lexi had said. If she hadn't been so selfish-

"Lexi, just breathe." Law said gently, crouching next to her and holding her by her shoulders. His fingers were warm, even through her shirt material. "You need to calm down."

Feeling the wet of tears streaming down her cheeks, she realized that her whole body was shaking and her breathing was coming out in shallow, uneven breaths. Her hands, which had been tightly clenching the sides of the box, slowly let go and covered her face in shame.

"It's..." she sobbed, "It's my fault..."

"What is your-"

"I told Brittany I...wouldn't go with her...on our run." She sniffed, wiping away at her tears futilely. "She thought it was because of the others that I wouldn't join her and now they're dead...she killed them because of me, I just know it..."

"How could that possibly be your fault?" He questioned sternly, squeezing her shoulders to get his point across since she wouldn't look at him. He felt slightly powerless to help, as he no longer trusted himself around her. He was afraid that if she looked him in the eyes this close, he'd want to kiss her again, so he didn't try to make her look at him.

Her crying hadn't ceased, and her voice wavered. "If I hadn't abandoned her like that...if...if I had told her yes, they'd still be alive."

"Lexi...she is a psychopath." He spelled out slowly. "Anyone else wouldn't resort to killing because someone told them no. You had no way of knowing she'd do this."

"I just..." Her voice trailed off, but he didn't let her continue.

"You are not to blame." He urged. "This is exactly why we're leaving. She's dangerous and unstable. She gets those around her killed. Natalya told me as much, they both probably knew something like this would happen eventually. If she hadn't been triggered by you rejecting her offer, something else would have down the line."

He left it at that, still holding her by the shoulders until she nodded emphatically, using her shirt to wipe away the wetness on her face. She still sniffed, holding back more tears and somewhat failing, but she no longer shook as severely as before and her breathing had mostly evened out. He released her, giving her some distance but still remaining close by for support.

"Thank you." She murmured miserably, smoothing down her shirt for wrinkles that weren't there. "I'm sorry I'm so emotional."

"Don't be. We understand." He replied patiently, not entirely able to relate with her turmoil, but clearly seeing how much it affected her. He didn't like seeing his companions in pain or anguish, Lexi included. "I think we forget to actually take a second to feel emotions like we're supposed to. Don't feel like you need to keep them hidden. Honestly...we could use the reminder sometimes."

The brunette looked up at him, but they both glanced away a split second later, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable.

It took a moment to get herself back in order, wiping away at the tears with the hem of her shirt. Her eyes would be red and puffy for a little while, but hopefully the boys wouldn't return before then. She didn't want to have to explain why she'd been crying. They might misinterpret it as Law making her upset in conjuncture with their...'argument.' No need to cause more confusion.

"I'm good now." She said in reassurance, going back to packing a few more water bottles in the box. Law very much doubted that she was back to 100%, but at least she appeared a bit more put together than a few minutes ago.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It's not much, but it's something." Shachi said, as he and Penguin re-entered their sleeping space with a box in hand. "Take a look."

Law and Lexi had finished the majority of the packing, including the food and water box, and had opted to relax until their friends returned. They perked up when they saw the small cardboard box of stuff they set on the ground.

Lexi was the first to rifle through it, picking up what stood out to her. Several packs of cigarettes, lighters to go with them, individual hand sanitizer bottles, a few water bottles with varied amounts of water left in them. They'd found a handful of assorted granola bars and packs of single-serving cookies that you'd find in a vending machine of some kind. Each went in their own separate pile to category.

"Nice, guys." Lexi said, grabbing the food and water they'd found to add it to the box of their edible items. "Where'd you find all this?"

Penguin shrugged, smiling. "I don't know what sort of office this was, but it seemed like most desks had a secret compartment in one of the drawers to keep things hidden."

"Probably hiding guilty pleasures from the managers." Shachi guessed.

"I'm surprised so much was left over." Law remarked, appraising the contents. In addition to everything else they'd gotten just from staying at this office building, he was surprisingly pleased with just how much they'd come away with. He thought this place wouldn't be more than a temporary shelter while they moved onto somewhere more secure. He wasn't always right, as this had just proved.

"Just looked a little harder this time around I guess. Since we're clearing house and all, didn't want to miss anything by accident.."

"Is that what you've been doing?"

All four survivors turned towards the stairwell, where Brittany stood leaning against the frame. Her hair looked mussed from her nap, but she seemed wide-awake and somewhat...amused. They hadn't even heard her come up the steps, and had been so caught up in what they'd found they hadn't seen her enter. Law internally cursed himself, feeling idiotic for not paying more attention.

"What?" She shrugged, stepping away from the doorway and seeing their surprising expressions. "No need to hide it, and it's not like I could stop you anyway. Things have gone to shit, and I probably look a little suspicious, don't I?"

Law's eyes narrowed, confirming her question.

She let out a breath but smiled. It didn't quite reach her eyes. "I get it. You only have my word to go on. People don't trust each other nowadays, and for good reason. Trusting the wrong people can get you killed."

"What is it you want? You came up here for a reason." Law said suddenly, standing to face her. His stare would have made others nervous.

She matched his gaze without flinching, however. "I'd like to talk to Lexi. In private."

Law's answer was immediate. "No."

Brittany's eyes narrowed. "I don't really think that's up to you. You'd really take away the chance for her to say goodbye to someone she cares about? Is that the sort of leader you are?"

"Of all the people, you're the one questioning my leadership?" He asked with disdain, but she waved the insult aside, turning instead to look at Lexi.

"Speak for yourself, Lex. I want to talk to you. Please."

Law was irked, and turned to his female companion. He didn't trust her not to try manipulating the brunette. "Lexi-"

"It's fine." She said, looking him in the eye so he knew she was serious. They were filled with this hardened resolve that hadn't been there before, and he wondered if she'd actually have the heart to deny her friend for a second time, especially after her small breakdown earlier.

Eventually he nodded, knowing that Brittany was somewhat right. He couldn't take away Lexi's choice, even if he wanted to. She'd probably resent him for it if he did, just a bit more than she probably already did. Her gaze settled back on Brittany. "Just give us a moment. I'll be back."

Feeling extremely uncomfortable, the leader watched as Lexi and her friend went back down the stairwell, disappearing from sight. He paced back and forth, knowing that Shachi and Penguin were just as uncomfortable.

Several stale minutes passed. They couldn't hear what the girls were saying, as they were speaking in hushed whispers below them. He had a feeling that Lexi was trying her hardest to deny her friend once and for all, but she was a very sympathetic person. It wouldn't be easy. And Brittany seemed very capable of swaying Lexi to her side if given enough time.

Finally, Law's thinning patience snapped. "Stay here." He instructed the other, stalking towards the stairwell to listen in for himself.

He took each step very slowly, not wanting his shoes to squeak or echo through the stairway for the girls to hear. He inched down, hoping that they were within a relatively small distance to the stairs so he could hear clearly.

He neared the bottom entryway of the stairs, flattening himself against the wall and grew still, listening intently. Their words were faint, but for the most part, he could hear them talking.

"...shouldn't be a hard decision. I'm your best friend. We have history. I care about your well-being. Don't you see that?"

"That's not what I'm arguing with you about. I'm not questioning the fact that you have my best interests in mind-"

"Then that alone should make your decision!"

"Brittany, they care just as much about me as you do."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I've survived with them for months! I'd think I know them well enough by now to be sure I can entrust my life to them."

"Ugh, you're so naive, Lexi. You're too trusting. You always have been."

"They came to rescue me when they had no obligation to, and they very well could have lost their lives while doing it. Don't tell me that I'm being naive."

Law was pleasantly surprised to hear the force with which she responded. He knew she was loyal to the group, but the fact that she bristled up when their loyalty to her was questioned was reassuring. She'd finally realized that she was part of the group and not an outsider they'd allowed to join.

He heard his name and his interest was piqued.

"Is it Law? I mean, I know he's a pretty face, but he seems-"

"Brittany, seriously. He has nothing to do with this."

"Oh, like hell it does."

"Stop patronizing me! I'm not a child! And unlike you, I've never been some horny, boy-toy that had to be attached to a man."

"Call me what you want, I'm not apologizing for who I am."

"Then neither am I. I'm staying with them."

"No, no no...this is the first time we split up all over again. You really gonna walk away and leave me alone...again...and live with yourself? You told me the guilt ate at you for weeks!"

"Don't make this about me."

"It's got everything to do with you! Just make the right choice..."

"No, Brittany, this has everything to do with you. I know you just lost your friends, and I'm sorry. I really am, but that doesn't mean I'm obligated to take their place. You don't want to be alone. I get it. But I'm not willing to just leave them behind."

"Then convince Law to let me join them!"

Law shook his head, thinking that she was just delusional now. Desperately holding on to some sort of way to stay together with her. Lexi was doing a good job of holding her own, though.

"They don't trust you, and no amount of me vouching for you would fix that. Even I'm finding it hard to believe what you say anymore."

"Really? Do you not see how they are manipulating you? Turning you against me because of how they feel? If not for them, you wouldn't be saying the things you are right now."

"You seem to be under the impression that I'm just some pawn everyone yanks around for the hell of it. Is that all you see me as?"

"Of course not!"

"Then stop assuming I can't think for myself and consider that these are my real feelings."

"Heh...So that's it then? You're just...gonna shove me aside just like before? Leave me alone after I've suffered from so much loss?"

"You're strong, Brittany. You've survived a long time on your own already. You'll fight through it. It's what you do. It's what you've always done, even back in college. I don't know of anyone else who's better at succeeding through sheer willpower. I'm not doing this to cause you pain. I don't want to watch you put yourself in danger by going out there alone, believe me. It's the last thing I want to do."

"If you're trying to make this conversation bittersweet, you're failing at it. Don't try to flatter me just to ease your own selfishness."

"That's not what I'm-"

"Who supported you with college after your grandmother died? Emotionally and financially? Me. Who backed you when that psycho Logan guy sued you for the death of his parents? Me. Guess who saved your ass from being eaten the very first day things went to shit? I did. And you throw that all in my face by abandoning me again."

Law couldn't quite tell who, but he assumed it was Lexi who took a steadying breath.

"I'm telling you no. I'm not going with you. I've found others I feel safe with, and I'm no longer willing to take the chance of leaving that behind to try...'us' again. It didn't work the first time, and I have no guarantee it will this time around."

"I can't believe I never saw you were such an awful friend...Figures. Loyalty died a long time ago, I guess."

"I'm sorry."

"Just go."

Law made his way quietly back up the stairs, glad that the conversation hadn't turned violent and he didn't have to step in. At least she'd finally put her foot down and stuck with her opinions, rather than let herself become emotionally swayed.

He made up the stairs before Lexi could see that he'd been eavesdropping.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The night was cold and windy. Somewhere, a broken window allowed the sharp breeze inside of the office, but Lexi knew it was a waste to try to find it. There wouldn't be much they could do to stop it, as everything they had was already packed up and ready to be moved when they left the office the next morning. Plus, she didn't want to move from her spot.

Her eyes followed the shambling figures down below from the window, idly wondering if any of them down there had once worked in this office. It was highly unlikely, as she was sure after 3 years they would have been distracted by one thing or another and wandered away, but it at least passed the time to wonder about it.

The boys snored quietly from their spots on the floor, Shachi having already passed out five minutes after waking her for watch half an hour ago. They were all getting in as much sleep as they could for the dangerous task they had ahead of them. Lexi was struggling to put her mind at ease, her conversation with Brittany on repeat within her own ears.

It had hurt so much to deny her like that. Even now, her chest ached, feeling like she was making a grave mistake, or that she was causing such pain to her once-friend. But she knew deeper down that Law's group was where she wanted to stay, and that if she had ended up taking Brittany's offer, the regret would build and build until the day she died.

The boys were her safety and comfort. They took the time to make her feel comfortable, to ask her opinion, and to make sure she felt included. Law's comment about her being manipulative had been filtering through Lexi's thoughts during her talk downstairs, and she'd come to the very sad conclusion that he was right.

All this time, what she mistook as Brittany looking out for her was just a long line of emotional string-pulling to get what she wanted out of her. It was a strange thing to realize, as she had so many happy memories of their time together before the world had ended. Two friends blissfully ignorant of the awful future they had awaiting them and everyone else they knew and loved.

Because Lexi did still love her. Like a sister, she loved Brittany in the full capacity that she could, and that only hurt worse.

They'd hung out and confided in one another, and supported each other where they could. College had brought them closer, creating what Lexi had thought to be a life-long friendship. Having it all tainted with the reality that Lexi had been nothing but someone Brittany could puppet to agree with her was sickening and almost too much for her to accept.

The moon was high up in the sky, and a menagerie of stars speckled in the blackness around it. Her closest approximation to what time it was was about midnight or 1 in the brunette pulled her knees to her chest on the rolling chair and leaned her forehead against the window, letting out a sigh. Her breath fogged up the window, and she watched as the edges slowly disappeared, the circle growing smaller and smaller until it disappeared completely.

Brittany was a killer. She hadn't dared ask the black-haired woman directly, but the facts weren't adding up to the story she'd told them. And every sign screamed that this was an intentionally attempt to convince Lexi to join her through guilt. Just another tally on the manipulation list.

Soft footsteps in the distance made her heart drop, and she grabbed for the handgun at her belt, standing from the chair.

They slowly ascended the steps, and Lexi was nearly in tears as Brittany emerged from the top, stopping when she noticed Lexi standing there, pointing the gun in her direction. The knife in her hand gleamed against the moonlight that filtered through the window.

So this is what it would come to...

"Why?" She whispered with quivering lip, the first tear sliding down her cheek as Brittany smiled.

"This is what you wanted, right?" Brittany said just as quietly, gesturing with the knife to the sleeping men nearby. Her smile was content, almost smug, despite walking closer to the gun. "To just get rid of me?"

Lexi's head shook adamantly, feeling the gun shake in her hands. She didn't want to do this. "Brit, please don't do this."

"I should have realized it sooner. You already wrote me off as dead, found yourself some new friends, so I guess you never really needed me all that much to begin with. You want to walk away from me again? Ok. Fine." She spread her hands apart and shrugged, her smile fading. "But I'm not making it easy on you. Not like last time."

"Please-"

"No." She interrupted, finally stopping with her chest pressed against the barrel of the gun. "If you're going to abandon a friend, leave her to die alone, then you're going to do it now. You're gonna shoot me in the chest, and you'll have my blood on your hands, and you'll see my face for the rest of your life because I'll make damn sure you feel guilty about it."

The barrel wavered as Lexi shook with anxiety and grief, but stayed fixed where her heart sat, inches away. Her vision was going blurry with the tears, but she simply blinked them away.

"I don't want to kill you." She sobbed in a harsh whisper.

"I know. That's why I'm still gonna give you a choice." The knife lowered, pointing towards Shachi's head several feet away. "I'll take him out first, then his friend, and then Law. Quick and silent. You won't have to kill a soul. And then we can take their stuff and survive together. Just like we used to. You and me against the world.

"Or," the knife eased back down next to her leg, "you kill me to save your new friends, the ones you've replaced me with."

She stated it so bluntly, as if her death was of zero importance to her. Did she care so little about herself? Or maybe she was just that confident that Lexi couldn't pull the trigger on her. Lexi wasn't even confident of that herself.

"So, what's it gonna be, Lex?"

"What really happened out there?" She questioned suddenly, trying desperately to try to stall for time. For what purpose, she still wasn't altogether sure. "To Candice and Natalya?"

Brittany rolled her eyes. "Does it even matter?"

Lexi nodded, fingers adjusting themselves on the grip of the gun. The woman sighed, but smiled ruefully.

"You've always been smart. I should have figured lying was a waste of breath."

"You killed them, didn't you?" Lexi guessed, and Brittany nodded.

"I had to, so you would come with me. But that was a waste of time too." Her expression never changed, never fluctuated or displayed any sign of guilt whatsoever. "Natalya tried fighting back, but it didn't do her much good."

The brunette didn't know what to say, her mouth dry. She blinked away more tears, unable to think of anything else to ask in order to stall this further. Part of her debated making a loud noise to wake the others up, but she wasn't confident that Brittany wouldn't get to one of them before she could shoot her down in all the confusion.

An impossible choice; choose the lives of the companions she'd come to know and love over the past months, or choose Brittany. Well...whatever was left of her. The woman that stood in front of Lexi was barely recognizable as the bubbly, outgoing, and confident woman from college. Only the outer shell remained. She had Brittany's face, but someone else stood in her shoes, desperately holding on to Lexi's emotions and refusing to let go.

"Come on, don't leave me standing here all night. Are you with me?" Brittany asked, smiling hopefully.

Lexi couldn't look away from her face, memorizing the way she looked one last time while she could. It was obvious to her, now that she really took a closer look. Brittany had died a long time ago. It was time to let go. Time to move on.

She adjusted her aim and squeezed without thinking about it further. The shot was loud in the enclosed space of the office, and the boys startled awake the instant she'd pulled the trigger. Shachi and Penguin yelled out in surprise, still unsure of what was happening, while Law immediately went for his sword laying nearby.

Brittany's body collapsed to the ground before they got their wits about them, the clear bullet hole in her forehead leaking blood into the short carpet. The larger exit wound began spreading a rapidly-widening puddle of blood underneath her. The knife lay beside her where it had fallen.

At least she won't come back as one of those...things.

Lexi lowered the gun, eyes affixed to the body. She couldn't really hear what the others were saying to her, it all was a fog. Or maybe the loud sound had popper her eardrum. But those dead eyes, and the slack jaw...it was too horrifying to look away from.

She vaguely felt as someone gently took the gun from her hands. The moment she no longer felt the metal, reality seemed to snap itself back into place, and both Shachi and Penguin were talking to her all at once.

Law chastised them for something, and the incessant talking went away She felt his warm hands on her shoulders again, standing to block her view at Brittany. He looked distressed.

"Are you injured?" He asked slowly, trying to break through her thoughts, eyes trailing her body for any sign of harm. She shook her head mutely, tears still leaking from the corners of her eyes. He winced, swiping the moisture from her cheeks away with his thumb.

She saw Shachi and Penguin bring one of their blankets over to the body, most likely to cover it so she wouldn't have to see. Law guided her to a chair and she sat numbly, eyes stuck to the sheet that was quickly being stained with red.

"What happened?" Law asked quietly, drawing her attention.

"She didn't give me a choice." Came her miserable reply, the dam to her crying slowly breaking. It shattered a second later, and he didn't hesitate to draw her into his arms, allowing her to let out her sobbing as long as she needed to into the fabric of his shirt.

Law caught Shachi and Penguin's eyes, but they were already preparing to move the dead woman's body before he had to ask. The brunette clung to him for dear life, her muffled cries painful to his ears. This was exactly what he'd been hoping to avoid.

He spent a long time just holding Lexi, not minding that his right shoulder was soaked because of her tears. Shachi and Penguin came back from taking care of the body, using one of Brittany's own blankets to cover the spot on the floor that was now stained deep red. They weren't sure what to do after that, and simply sat, waiting for Lexi to settle.

Eventually, she had spent herself to depletion, both in tears and energy, and her pitiful sobs had quieted into grief-stricken whimpers, until finally her breathing evened out and she fell into a deep sleep.

Law shared a concerned glance with his two friends, worried what this might do to her psyche. It had been an emotionally taxing day for her, and this had just exacerbated it. The sense of urgency to leave the office disappeared too, as there was no threat to distance themselves from anymore. But one thing was still certain, especially after all of this.

They weren't staying here any longer than they had to. It was time to move on. Somewhere that didn't hold painful memories for the brunette.

Chapter 36 ->

#one piece #zombies #zombie au #fanfic #fanfiction #trafalgar law #law #law x oc #oc #shachi #penguin #romance #tragedy #horror #blood and gore #mature #post apocalyptic