So, lat month I was chatting with a coworker of mine, talking about how I wanted to make a cold frame for my porch.
A cold frame is a little planter with glass or plastic roof to trap heat. A teeny little greenhouse, kinda. They’re best placed on south-facing areas for best heat and sunlight, and I have a south-facing porch
My coworker is blown away by this idea and immediately says, ooh, I need to build one too!! And then she says to me, ‘Actually, I’m getting my windows replaced in two weeks. Do you think those might work? Also, would you be interested in one of my old windows?’ 🤩
I am so excited to build this cold frame!!!!!
It isn’t all vinyl - there’s exposed wood in pristine condition on the other side - so I’ll have to stain it with something. I read that linseed oil is good but I need to do more research
My coworker is mostly going to use her cold frame for seedlings in the very early spring, which is wise and I’m glad she gave me that idea. I want to try using mine through the whole winter: the last few years have been so hot all winter that I might get a couple months season extension if I play my cards right: I mostly want carrots and spinach and those are cold season veggies (oh man if I could grow peas 🤩)
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Cold Frame | Chapter 32 | 4.2k
by NamelessDragon (@anamelessdragon)
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Summary:
Inability to get drunk notwithstanding, Steve felt a lot lighter after dinner.
It wasn’t really how he’d expected the day to end for him personally after the intensity of the revelations he and Bucky had passed between themselves. He’d tried to end their conversations on a good note, and he was profoundly grateful that Bucky had finally opened up to him, but neither admission had exactly been easy.
It felt like it was the third time in his life that Steve had been trying to move on from something so majorly destabilizing to the person he thought he was and his entire place in the world. It didn’t seem like he was getting any better at it. Getting everything out in the open, even to someone he trusted, was like lancing a wound with a jagged razor: more painful than the dull pressure and radiating ache he’d been suppressing since he’d gotten back, with exposed nerves sharply raw in the aftermath while adrenaline swirled in his blood. He’d carried the aftereffects with him deep in his chest and stomach hours after the event.
A good part of that was because it just meant that someone knew. He’d gone back in time while Bucky had been struggling, and after all of that, had been soundly prevented from following through on the extremely vital mission needed to try and make that better.
To make anything at all better.
And when it came to Bucky’s confession about what had happened when he’d interacted with the Infinity Stones… Steve knew they’d have to circle back around to that situation, eventually. To Tony. Bucky couldn’t keep just waiting around for whatever retaliation he was expecting.
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A mostly-dead Loki shows up face-planted in Bucky’s garden one day while Steve’s over for lunch. (Throws Infinity War/Endgame deaths and other parts of canon out the window.)
Pairings/Characters: Slow burn Loki/Steve/Bucky, past Steve/Peggy, referenced Sam/Bucky UST.
Warnings: Chapter 32 - UST
Read on AO3.
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Cold Frame | Chapter 33 | 3.0k
by NamelessDragon (@anamelessdragon)
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Summary:
Steve stared at Bucky with his lips parted, the tension from his earlier irritation still visible in the lines between his eyebrows and the way he was breathing way too slow and deliberately for it to be a natural pattern. His eyes cast down to the floor, then back up at Bucky, confusion edging out some of the stiffness in his expression.
“You're worried Loki’s going to try something with me."
Bucky huffed, shaking his head at Steve’s statement, thinking that this was one of the last conversations he'd have wanted to end the night on. But he couldn’t let Loki’s behavior go, now that he thought he had a bigger picture of what it meant, and what was probably going to happen when Steve was alone with him.
Because whether or not Loki could drain and use the imprint the Space Stone had left in Steve was still in question. What wasn’t in question was what Bucky had already experienced that morning when he’d been alone with Loki.
It was still fresh enough that it felt like it was happening as he recalled it: long, deft fingers that had pressed firmly into the knotted muscles of his back. An unrelenting, keen gaze, blue eyes bright as Loki had signaled for Bucky to strip out of his shirt. How his voice had sounded, full of heartfelt gratitude, as he’d spoken his thanks in Bucky’s ear, his damp body pressed to Bucky’s front.
Bucky couldn’t remember the last time anyone had thanked him for anything with that level of sincerity.
Then he thought of how Steve had guided Loki to the dinner table, so sure and sturdy, and the little looks that had crossed Loki’s face with every touch. How Loki’s hand had stayed on Steve’s wrist after he’d been guided back to the living room. Christ, he’d joked with Steve, even tried to roughhouse with him, risking injury for a game.
He was learning about their individual wants and needs. What opened them up.
The strength in his physical body wasn’t the only thing that was returning.
____________________
A mostly-dead Loki shows up face-planted in Bucky’s garden one day while Steve’s over for lunch. (Throws Infinity War/Endgame deaths and other parts of canon out the window.)
Pairings/Characters: Slow burn Loki/Steve/Bucky, past Steve/Peggy, referenced Sam/Bucky UST.
Warnings: Chapter 33 - UST
Read on AO3.
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you know, with hindsight now what it is I really do think a more literal reading of c!techno's chat would have helped his characterization a Lot
and mind you, this was originally intended to be the case, and very well may have been intended all along even if it wasn't usually emphasized within the lore
and don't get me wrong, I Get why it fell out of favor within the fandom. it coincides with a Very storied ableist trope that demonizes DID and disorders adjacent to it, and Can be spoken about in a way that is essentially indistinguishable from it depending on the word choice.
but the thing is ! not only does it not Have to be an allegory for DID, I straight up don't think it is At All.
because we Know what it's an allegory for. It's His Chat. there's technoblade playing the game, and there's the thousands of people watching with expectations and wants that he's compelled to meet (or, at the very least, pacify through Entertainment).
and this makes much Much more sense when conceived of as Supernatural. be that spirits, gods, demons, or anything that could fill that role. separate entities that, for whatever reason, only techno can sense the presence of and be affected by.
and of course, to an extent this is true for all creators. everyone had an audience that they were meant to entertain and the choices they made were influenced by that fact.
but technoblade came in with a Very distinct set of expectations that heavily impacted the choices he was Expected to make and the kinds of stories that he could tell. he was more or less a living legend in real life just as much as he was in roleplay, and these things were inherently connected.
and it's like !
when c!technoblade says he was peer pressured into killing tubbo at the red festival he Is technically talking about what happened within the roleplay. schlatt was demanding it from him, there's a sort of pressure there. but schlatt was also the dictator they were set to kill, and techno has never had any trouble fighting people he considered a dictator before, and certainly not Schlatt of all people.
but he WAS being peer pressured By His Audience. by thousands of people, most of which were demanding blood Because It Was The Expectation, because it'd be Fun.
out of universe technoblade made the decision he thought would be the most Entertaining, and he was right! consistently he made choices that would let him do the most bombastic Spectacles possible. And It's Great. he's Excellent at pulling dramatics and making a compelling scene that give other people room to work off of. in that sense I'd consider techno an Excellent actor, and I have to imagine that he was fun to work with.
the problem is when you then have to justify it from an in character perspective, grounded in those mushy things like Feelings with characters that can be traumatized and sustain lasting damage, Especially Without acknowledging the out of character incentive.
mind you, it's not Impossible to Create a backstory that could justify it. why a character as consistently powerful and feared as technoblade would feel pressured to kill an ally by someone he not only Can kill but Wanted To Kill. why a character as seemingly secure and in control as technoblade would lash out the way that he does to perceived betrayal, and yet consistently puts no weight onto having killed and permanently scarred an ally that trusted him.
what that'd need is tragedy. a storied history of being hurt and having to survive. building up To an untouchable god from a much much more vulnerable position. Long Lasting trauma that's lead to this deep insecurity and paranoia. and that's Possible and that's Compelling.
but it's just not in the text.
not only did we never learn basically Anything that c!technoblade was up to pre-series, we actually know Less by the end than when we started because of the sbi retconning.
it's a Theoretically Possible interpretation that's technically never Contradicted by canon, but would have to be created by scratch. it's a compelling idea for a fan fic (and one I'd like to read) and it's compelling for a theoretical recontextualization of the character, but it's just not In The Text.
meanwhile, we have the video above.
we have the Objective Fact that technoblade's decision making was often subject to the rule of cool (very Very effectively) to entertain his audience.
and most compellingly, these concepts Don't Need To Be Separate. in fact, in my opinion they're Stronger when you put them together.
because the thing is. it's Difficult to imagine techno as ever being in a vulnerable position. he is just Objectively more powerful than everyone else on the server, both in real life And within the lore. How could he have ever been afraid when he was stronger than anyone and everyone combined? when we saw with our own eyes that techno could face nearly the whole server at once and win.
but he Is a tragic character, at least he's meant to be. and that tragedy makes much Much more sense as something Inward.
technoblade as a character who Needs connection, who Needs stability, who Needs security, who Needs friendship and community and Love. but Lashes Out, Obliterates to the core of the earth, because of something that's not only out of his control but that other people Cannot Understand.
how do you explain to a child that you killed their best friend because a chorus of the undead called for his blood and you (in all the glory that he'd idolized) were unable to do anything but comply? how do you explain to that child that you beat him senseless in a pit as the restless dead jeered and laughed?
That's interesting. That's Compelling.
technoblade is idolized like a god, feared like a force of nature, and in an instant cut himself off from nearly everyone who'd considered him an ally. and that seems to be a pattern, over and over and over again. he's left isolated, and in return he faces retaliation, and in return he's always Waiting for retaliation.
and what do you say to someone who wants to kill you for being a monster? that it's Fine Actually because you only did what you did because you have a curse that compels you to? that the supernatural guided you to destroy their homes and kill their people? (rip jack manifold you will be missed)?
That Doesn't Quite Help Your Case.
technoblade as someone who is beholden to this literal cycle of violence and Loses those things that could ground him, community, stability, People, as a result. who Tries to overcome this very fact (to become a better person, in his own words as per the clip above), but is pulled back into it as a consequence of his own actions.
that's a tragedy !! that Makes Sense. that allows him to be Both this force of nature that other characters have to survive And A Person Who Is Hurt By The Same Conflict.
"I'm a person!"
that fear of dehumanization makes So So Much More Sense when you see technoblade as someone who Already fears himself. who fears being a monster, who fears losing control, who has faced isolation again and again and again.
and, importantly, it doesn't have to be anyone else's Fault.
by making the source both Internal and Completely External (something that none of the other characters have any awareness or control over), you can Have techno as a tragic character without demonizing anyone else Or erasing the impact that c!techno had on them.
and in that sense, it Can be an allegory for mental illness, but not in that direct "oooooh how scary he hears voices" kind of way that people fear it looks. but in that sometimes people Will do things that can hurt others while not feeling in control. anger and mania and paranoia, things that you can't always Control and yet that impact that you have on other people still Matters.
and the answer to that is, often, vulnerability and accountability.
I think a lot about technoblade isolating himself so near entirely from the rest of the server, and slowly gathering a support system Back by the end. and I Really Do think that framing of it through this lens is a Very impactful way of breaking it down.
tubbo, tommy, wilbur, ranboo, niki, I think they'd All understand not feeling in control. lashing out, maybe even feeling justified in the moment, but hurting people they care about and furthering their own isolation.
There's Something There, and it's already In The Text. it just needs to be expanded on.
and why not do that ourselves now?
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