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#conceit welcome
pizza-feverdream · 10 months
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I spent more time editing the gif than the actual artwork lol
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Here's the Boys. They're just some Totally Not Screwed Up Guys
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wiseatom · 10 months
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i tried for a well thought out post. instead you get this mess that i’m begging you not to twist:
the outraged cries of “cliques” are people being actual friends with each other. the people complaining about certain blogs or creators being on pedestals are usually the same people putting them there. i’m not one to belittle feelings - i understand where the upset is coming from. i even understand my place in it! but at the end of the day, we’re working ourselves up over what? notes? followers? hits on a fic? things based on luck and timing??
i can only speak for myself, but i work a full time job and i’m hard scheduled 45 hours a week. all of my free time goes towards fic writing, because that’s For Me and that’s what’s important for my mental health, and even then, i am usually too exhausted to do that. i would love to read fic and interact more! my to-read list is a mile long! it is just genuinely hard for me to find the time. i prioritize my friends because they are my friends — real, actual people i know beyond tumblr mutualship, who i talk to about more than just fic writing — and even then i am late getting around to it. i’m not saying this as a “woe is me, my life is hard” moment, but moreso trying to offer a perspective that is not even being thought of. and i get it, no one wants to hear it, because you’re frustrated, and being vocal about frustration feels nice (i know, bc here i am)!!
someone is going to come for my throat for making this post as a “big author” and “part of the clique we’re all vagueing” and maybe it’s juuuuust me but like. if you’re that unhappy, log off. if seeing a friend group you’re not part of interacting makes you unhappy, log off. if seeing the engagement other people get on their posts or fic or art makes you unhappy, log off. you cannot force people to interact with you or your creative work, and aggressively posting about it when they don’t is not inviting them to. i am begging you to stop having expectations of people you do not know, because at the end of the day, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.
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fithragaer · 10 months
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Kos or some say kosm
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Me: I'm fine about my autism now btw, like I've come to terms with my fixated interests, limited tolerances and social inabilities. The alienation it brings is not ideal but it's just a reality I've gotta deal with now that I know it's just a part of who I am. I mean, it's not like an awkward conversation is gonna ruin anyone's life, is it? We'll both move on from it eventually. This is fine!
Also me: physically unable to watch beyond the first word of the first question of The Assembly because oh my god what if someone says something awkward or controversial or someone can't make themselves understood people are gonna get mad and scream about it online and I will freeze up and be stuck in the backlash forever I don't know how to handle conflict AT ALL let's just hide in the corner behind the sofa instead wait what if I became a hermit actually yeah yeah yeah that sounds good let's do that
#unresolved trauma? never even heard of her haha 😅#maddie debrief#that 2-minute intro/taster did nothing to calm me down either btw#I'm never comfortable around the types of shows where 'difference' becomes the core conceit of the premise#oh. so you've created a format dependent on making a socially alienated group face the social rules that made them alien in the first place#and then deriving your conflict from the 'natural contradiction' between the two?#sounds like the exact kind of conflict-seeking environment where I can let my normal guard down enough to meaningfully challenge#my deeply rooted feeling that people generally find me cumbersome to be around and mostly just tolerate my presence out of necessity#lovely that#(like i say I haven't seen the show#so idk if it is actually like that or if it's just the promo material stirring shit up as per usual#but as of rn I do not feel welcome in this room)#why does the 'we're not so different after all' always have to come at the climax and never the midpoint of the story?#why can we never find more than personal gratification in that realisation?#why do we always focus on the difficulty of coming to the realisation rather than the conflict of putting the realisation into *practice*?#I know why#it is because the human imagination is far more limited than we like to believe#and we find it hard to even *imagine* a world that we haven't seen functioning for ourselves yet#let alone find a purpose in *acting* on the idea#(especially if we ourselves currently feel dependent on the status quo for our personal welfare#which is why shows made to depend on 'difference = conflict' make my blood run cold)#so if we have to see to believe - how many cases of real world functioning equity does the average person understand?#very few. so let's instead lazily invert the state of power in an existing dynamic that people are familiar with#thereby reaffirming its false dichotomy through perpetuating what is essentially the same old conflict#while claiming to subvert it when in fact all we have done is reverse the dominance while keeping everyone locked in their roles#can someone just put some thought into how we might create a format that aims to loosen up the underlying skewed power dyanmic#so that everyone has to work together to prevent the elevation of a single way of being over all others#because that just becomes suffocating to *everyone* in the end#and that can still *acknowledge difference* but not as a source of conflict - rather as a source of collective strength?#but the story of changing one perspective will always be easier to both tell and enjoy than the one about building something new
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Jane Austen: so, you go to Mr Collins' house and Elizabeth is there alone. She welcomes you politely, but she looks---troubled.
Colonel Fitzwilliam: and of course she does, after everything I said to her-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: do I sense if she is mad at me specifically or it is just her headache?
Jane Austen: roll an Investigation Check.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *grimacing* it's a three.
Jane Austen: just her headache.
Caroline Bingley: *derisively* she only looks like she wants to stab you, Darcy.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *shrugs* I guess I am too nervous to really give her a proper look.
Jane Austen: what do you do next?
Fitzwilliam Darcy: well, I-I tell her, "In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."
Jane Austen: Elizabeth blushes. She is absolutely stunned.
Georgiana Darcy: that is good, right? Right?
Fitzwilliam Darcy: I tell her that even if her family is--not ideal-
Charles Bingley: *making a face*
Caroline Bingley: *playfully disgusted frown* and I made my character romance you?
Fitzwilliam Darcy: -and I might be acting impulsively, I just have to let her know that I love her. That's it.
**Silence**
Jane Austen: *smacks her lips* okay-
Charles Bingley: *histerical laughter* I don't like the way you said it-
Colonel Fitzwilliam: it's an immediate natural one, yes? Please tell me it's immediate.
Georgiana Darcy: shhhh!
Jane Austen: give me a Persuasion Check-let me tell you, you have to roll very high.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: figures-very well-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *beat*
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *flatly* natural one.
Colonel Fitzwilliam: JUSTICE!
Jane Austen: *claps her hands* you make your grand love confession, but Elizabeth stops you and immediately rejects you.
Fitzwilliam Darcy: ouch.
Jane Austen: she tells you that she could never marry the person that hurt her sister and destroyed Wickham's future-
Fitzwilliam Darcy: *dawning horror* I had forgotten they had talked, fuck-
Jane Austen: and, finally-
Charles Bingley: there is more? He is already dead-
Jane Austen: Elizabeth looks at you dead in the eye and says: "From the very beginning—from the first moment, I may almost say—of my acquaintance with you, your manners, impressing me with the fullest belief of your arrogance, your conceit, and your selfish disdain of the feelings of others, were such as to form the groundwork of disapprobation on which succeeding events have built so immovable a dislike; and I had not known you a month before I felt that you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry."
Fitzwilliam Darcy: damn.
Caroline Bingley: *dying of laughter under the table*
Charles Bingley: I do not know if I can resurrect you after that.
Georgiana Darcy: I knew it, I should have given you Bardic Inspiration-
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dearesmeray · 3 months
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Character Traits & Quirks (For Writers)
Peace and blessings upon everyone!
I hope life's treating you well. I’m Esmeray and I welcome you to this post on my blog Dear Esmeray.
Ever wondered what makes your OC truly unforgettable? I believe it is the character traits. Character traits are what bring a character to life, or else you just have a flat, one-dimensional everyman as your OC. So today I'll be sharing with you a list of character traits that I compiled to help you develop better OCs.
Positive Traits:
Agreeable
Brave
Caring
Cheerful
Confident
Cooperative
Creative
Dedicated
Devotion
Diligent
Disciplined
Dutiful
Easygoing
Efficient
Fairness
Forgiveness
Friendly
Funny
Generous
Hard-Working
Honest
Honorable
Humble
Kind
Leadership
Love of learning
Loyal
Passionate
Persuasive
Prudent
Principled
Punctual
Reasonable
Reliable
Respectful
Responsible
Self-regulation
Social Intelligence
Supportive
Trust-worthy
Well-mannered
Witty
Wise
Neutral Traits & Quirks:
Raises Eyebrows
Blinks rapidly
Avoids eye contact
Maintains eye contact
Blinks rapidly
Slouches
Stares off into the distance
Shrugs often
Touches their scars or wounds often
Chews lips
Paces around
Smiles a lot
Rarely smiles
Gestures with hands while speaking
Often is distracted
Hums
Negative Traits:
Absentminded
Abusive
Acts superior
Alcoholic
Aggressive
Always plays the victim
Aimless
Apathetic
Arrogant
Argumentive
Avoids their problems
Bossy
Blunt
Boring
Careless
Can't take criticism
Can't take a joke
Clumsy
Conceited
Controlling
Cunning
Childish
Cruel
Deceptive
Defiant
Demanding
Disloyal
Dishonest
Dramatic
Dependent
Disorganized
Disrespectful
Distracted easy
Extravagant
Envious
Forgetful
Greedy
Holds grudges
Makes up excuses for everything
Has a reason for why nothing is ever their fault
No accountability
Hostile
Hypopocrite
Immature
Impatient
Impractical
Impressionable
Impulsive
Insensitive
Irresponsible
Not a team player
Incompetent
Irritable
Inconsiderate
Indulgent
Insecure
Jealous
Know-It-All
Lazy
Liar
Loud
Manipulative
Makes everything about them
Makes everything a joke
Their way or the highway
Mean
Meddlesome
Messy
Naive
Nosy
Obnoxious
Obbssesive
Offended easily
Overdramatic
Overreacts
Patronizing
Power-hungry
Pretentious
Rebellious
Reckless
Rude
Sarcastic
Selfish
Sensitive
Stingy
Sexist
Spoiled
Stubborn
Superstitious
Talks over others/interrupts
Too loyal
Too forgiving
Undependable
Unreliable
Unsympathetic
Unorganized
Unreasonable
Violent
Weak
Remember, there are no one-dimensional characters in real life, and there shouldn't be in your stories either. The possibilities for your characters are endless – so get creative and have fun writing!
With Love, Esmeray ♡
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artbyblastweave · 10 days
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A few years ago, there was a thread on r/asksciencefiction where someone was fishing for a superhero story with an inverted Omni-Man dynamic, or a setting where Homelander's initial presentation is played straight- a setting where the Superman figure actually is the paragon of morality he's initially presented as, but no other superhero is- a situation where you've got one really competent true-blue hero standing head-and-shoulders in power above what's otherwise a complete nest of vipers.
Someone in the thread floated My Hero Academia; while I haven't read it, my understanding is that that's not really an accurate read of what's going on with Stain's neurosis about All-Might being the only "real hero," that the point of that arc is that Stain's got an insane and unreasonable standard and that taking an endorsement deal, while bad, isn't actually grounds for execution. My own contribution to the thread was Gail Simone's Welcome to Tranquility, where a major part of the backstory involved the faux Justice-League's Superman analogue having a little accident because he's the only one who thought they were morally obligated to go public with the secret life-extending macguffin that the rest of the team is using to enforce comic-book time on themselves and their loved ones; while only a couple members of the team are directly in on it, the rest are conveniently incurious. And Jupiter's Legacy gets tantalizingly close to this- The Utopian, a well-meaning stick-in-the-mud, ultimately gets blindsided and couped by his scheming brother who creates a superhero junta staffed by a Kingdom-Come-style glut of third-gen superheroes, who are framed as fundamentally self-interested because only came onto the scene after most of the situations you legitimately need a superhero to handle have been neutralized. (The rub, of course, is that the comic is also highly critical of the Utopian's intellectually incurious self-righteously 'apolitical' approach to superheroism- if for no other reason than that it left him in a position to get blindsided by a coup!) While Jupiter's Legacy gets the closest, all three of these are only loosely orbiting around the spirit of the original idea, and there's something really interesting there- particularly if the Superman figure isn't hopelessly naive in the same way as Utopian. Because first of all, if you're Metaman or Amazingman or whatever brand-name alias the writer goes with, and you really earnestly mean it, and you put together a team of all the other most powerful heroes on earth in order to pool your resources, and then with dawning horror you gradually begin to realize that everyone in the room besides yourself is a fascist or a con artist or abuser or any other variant of a kid with a magnifying glass eyeing that anthill called Earth- What the hell is your next move?
Do you just call the whole thing off? Can you trust that they'll actually go home if you call the whole thing off? I mean you've put the idea in their heads, are you sure that they aren't going to, like, start the Crime Syndicate in your absence? Do you stick around to try and enact containment, see if getting all of these people on a team makes them easier to keep on a leash? But that's functionally going to make you their enabler pretty quickly, right? Overlooking "should you kill them-" can you kill them? You're stronger than any individual one of them- are you stronger than all of them? The first time one of them really crosses a line in a way you can't ignore- will that be a one-on-one fight? Are they the kind of people capable of putting two-and-two together and pre-emptively ganging up on you if you push back too hard? Do you just start trying to get them killed, or keep them at each other's throats so they can't coordinate anything really nasty? Can you squeeze any positive moral utility out of them, or is that just a way to justify not doing the hard work of taking them down? There've been works where the conceit is to question the default assumption that Superman in specific would be a good person, and there've been works where the conceit is to question the default assumption that superheroes in general would be good people. Something to be done, I think, with questioning the default assumption that everyone Superman becomes professionally close to would be good, and to explore how he'd handle it if they weren't.
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txttletale · 5 months
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how would you recommend watching doctor who? there are so many different guys idk how it works.
so the thing about doctor who is that there's two shows -- classic who (1963-1989, doctors 1-7) and new who (2005-2023, doctors 9-14). due to a renumber of the seasons and a change in production company, i think it's fair to call the upcoming version of who (2023-??, doctors 15-??) its own, third show. the reason it's been able to run for so long is that when the show's lead actor, (william hartnell as the titular doctor) had to step down in 1966 due to failing health, they made up some sci-fi bullshit: the doctor's species can 'regenerate' instead of dying, instantly healing but changing their appearance and some of their personality. this means that every time a lead actor has walked away (or, in one unfortuante case, been fired) the show's just recast the doctor and moved on, often with notable changes in tone and format.
the easiest option if you don't want to backwatch anything is to start with this year's christmas special, the church on ruby road (2023). it's an obvious jumping on point to the series, introduces you to all the basic stuff (the doctor, the TARDIS, the fact that it's a silly sci-fi show about fighting weird rubber prop critters), and presumably sets up the upcoming season 1 of the disney-bad wolf version of the show that's gonna come out in may 2024.
if you do want to backwatch, you have to decide if you want to start with new who or classic who. i personally would recommend starting with new who, because there's less of it, it's got higher production values, and (imo this is the biggest obstacle to getting into classic who) it's paced in a way that makes much more sense to a modern TV viewer (self-contained 45-minute episodes). also once you're invested in the show, its main character, and some of its classic elements, you get to soyjak at the screen whenever you're watching classic who and you get to see the oirign of a monster you already recognize. you can also skip classic who entirely and never watch it, they don't bring up anything from it in the new series without giving it a new explanation, but if you do this you hate fun.
anyway, starting points for nuwho: the most obvious one is rose (2005). it's the pilot episode for the new show and imo it holds up brilliantly -- it introduces all the most basic concepts of the show, but ultimately it's really all about billie piper and cristopher eccleston's performances and they deliver. the special effects are gonna be pretty terrible for a while because it's early 2000s cg. there's no jumping on point like it for the whole of RTD's run of the show (imo, the best run of nuwho) so if you want to watch seasons 1-4 you've gotta start on rose.
another episode that's written as a jumping on-point is (heavy sigh) the eleventh hour (2011). as well as introducing matt smith's doctor and his companion amy, this also does the whole rigamarole of introducing the show's core elements, giving a nutshell recap of its history in the form of the doctor's rooftop speech, and also signal what the oncoming moffat era is going to be like (whimsical, full of complex time travel plots, way more misogynist). i'm biased -- i'm a hater, one of this episode's central plot conceits sucks real bad and i also hate the eleventh doctor's whole run. but it is meant to be a jumping on point.
there won't be another one of those in nuwho until the pilot (2017). this begins moffat's final season with which he made the odd but extremely welcome decision to jettison all his convoluted continuity shit from the last five seasons and refocus the show with the doctor being a professor at bristol university with a mysterious secret. i think season 10 is a hidden gem and if you find starting from rose daunting this is the next best place to pick up. capaldi's doctor is a delightful abrasive eccentric with a heart of gold at this point in his run & the stories are wall-to-wall bangers with only a couple misses.
finally, you could start on the woman who fell to earth (2018), the first episode to feature jodie whittaker's 13th doctor and head writer chris chibnall. i'd recommend this even less than the eleventh hour, because while i actually like it more, i think it's a much worse preview of what the upcoming era is going to be like than that one. if you watch the woman who fell to earth and keep watching from the start of whittaker's run on the show off the back of it, you're going to be severely disappointed as most of the more promising aspects of the episode get instantly abandoned.
so, summary, if you're starting with nuwho, there's five jumping on points, which i'd rank:
rose > the pilot > the church on ruby road > the eleventh hour > the woman who fell to earth
but i want to start with classic who because i'm a contrarian
alright. classic who also has a few jumping off points -- before i mentioned them, let me just talk about that format thing i mentioned earlier. classic who doesn't have self-contained episodes for the most part, but rather for most of its run told each of its episodic narratives across between two and seven 20-minute episodes. this leads to a lot of weird pacing, forced cliffhangers, and infamously a lot of filler shots of the doctor running up and down identical corridors. so obvsies i'm recommending entire stories here nad not individual episodes. that said, let's look at where you could jump on:
an unearthly child (1963). this is, like, the start of the show. that said i don't recommend it as a place to start (funnily enough), for a couple reasons. firstly, because of dreadful fucking archiving by the BBC, a lot of episodes from the show's first six seasons are straight up missing. some of them have been animated by the BBC from surviving audio recordings, but some of them are just straight up lost -- due to the format, this means there's very few full complete stories, which makes this whole era really hard to navigate. if you don't mind that and really want to start in the black and white era, i'd still recommend the tomb of the cybermen (1967) instead -- hartnell's portrayal of the doctor as a haughty, slightly impish old professor is great, but troughton basically defined the character's core traits for the next sixty years.
spearhead from space (1970) is a pretty big format upheaval for the show and so serves as a pretty great classic jumping-on point. it's the first episode to be in colour, and sets up a new status quo for the doctor as being trapped on earth and working for an elite paramlitary organization called UNIT that operates out of a ratty office. it's an interesting premise that the show gets some great stories out of. the special effects are bad in the best way. pertwee has instant charm in the role and it's all around a banger by classic standards.
if you want to jump right to the one all the boomers are nostalgic for, you can also start with robot (1974). i wouldn't recommend it, though--tom baker is electric in the role from the start, but the episode itself kind of assumes a lot of the context of the third doctor's setup and supporting cast which you're not gonna have.
i wouldn't recommend anyone start at any point during the fifth or sixth doctors runs because i want them to actually like the show, so i guess the last jumping on point i could really recommend after robot would be, like, dragonfire (1987), which heralds the show's short-lived renaissance with the seventh doctor and his best companion, ace. but although you'd be watching some of the absolute best the classic show ever gets, it feels like it would be a weird and disorienting place to start.
finally, you could watch tales of the tardis (2023), a limited series produced to celebrate the show's 60th anniversary. each episode follows the same format: through a vaguely handwaved Palace of Memories plot, two much-aged characters from the classic series meet up and fondly remember one of the adventures they shared. the bookends with the original actors are mostly shameless fanservice, but the episodes they're reminiscing about are superbly edited down into a much more watchable format -- it works as a good 'sample platter' for most eras of the show (although, weirdly, there wasn't anything from tom baker's run!) and i think it honestly wouldn't be a bad shout to just start from tales of the tardis and then keep watching from whichever of the stories featured in it you liked most. that all said, if you want to start with classic who, i'd rank these jumping on points as follows:
spearhead from space > tales of the tardis > tomb of the cybermen > dragonfire > robot > an unearthly child
all that shit said it's fundamentally a very episodic show with very few exceptions like trial of a time lord and whatever moffat was doing seasons 6-7 so in the end you can basically just start with any episode and more or less get some of the idea. have fun and make sure to do the most important job of a doctor who fan, update the tardis wiki page for penis whenever one is mentioned
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pinkmirth · 9 months
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nfl reiner braun tears his alc and requests the best surgeon to work on it. he gets, youuuu, sweet smelling pink doctor coat wearing you and he can’t even take you serious when you’re going over his chart or requesting to feel the muscle with those pink gloves on. you even look younger than him and he’s telling you: “darlin’, listen… im a big deal around here and i need someone to help fix me not give me a boner.” or something like that and you almost don’t have the heart to tell him that you’re the best that there’s ever been at this hospital.
RECOVERY, reiner braun !
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୨୧ — pairing: footballer!reiner braun x fem!reader
୨୧ — synopsis: this doctor’s got a hardheaded patient! it’ll take some effort to convince him of your effectiveness . . .
୨୧ — contains: ( 1.4k words of . . . ) modern au, slight nsfw (more like suggestive!), footballer!reiner, surgeon!reader, fem!reader (black coded), reiner has an ACL tear, reiner’s touch-deprived/sexually frustrated, rei’s kindaaa conceited (just a little bit!), palming, minors shoo!
୨୧ — mira’s note: ramona, my love! i adore all your reiner concepts, they’re always sooo perfect 🎀 thank youuu for sharing your rei-rei thoughts with me :) now here’s a lil drabble for my gorgeous man! (not really proofread thoroughly, i apologize for any typos or mistakes!)
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isopropyl.
it’s all that reiner can smell. he’s a healthy man, he hardly belongs here— in this chilled surgeon office with the most pale, unflattering lighting. the parchment-like exam table paper rustles beneath him with every stretch and maneuver he makes, and his weight is enough to pry a creak out of the treatment table every now and again.
a recurring clack of footsteps and the whine of the door lets reiner know that you, the ‘sexy doctor lady from earlier’ has returned from reading his screenings. he wasn’t able to catch your name amidst the splitting pain from his acl tear, so that’ll make do in the meantime.
you set down your clipboard and turn to face him. your dear patient appears a bit mussed from the big game that took place earlier— his golden hair’s all fluffy and wild, that red football uniform of his is streaked with the green of the field, and his left cheekbone got a little scratch somehow. you’ll make sure to dab that with rubbing alcohol later.
“your vitals are well above average.” you commend. his reply’s a mere grunt. he can’t bring himself to take you seriously. just fucking look at you; pink latex gloves pulled over manicured hands, welcoming eyes all doe and shiny, with a sweet glossed smile that he won’t forget for days to come. he hates having to meet such a beauty under these grim circumstances– after all, you’re the kind of woman he’d take out on a date.
“lucky for you, mister braun, your injury isn’t a complete tear . . . so your recovery time shouldn’t be too long. it’ll last about six months, give or take.”
he isn’t listening.
reiner isn’t even sure of when he began to space out; your lips are just so plush, so alluring. his surname sounds sweeter than it should when falling from your mouth. before long, you clear your throat. it’s enough to snap him out of it. “i’d appreciate your undivided attention, sir. we’re currently going over your healing plan— ”
“lemme ask you, sugar,” he interjects with a low rasp. reiner braun’s well known around these parts, and you can only assume that being such a big deal has gotten to his head. what he says next throws you off, “when’s the real doctor comin’ in, hm?” it’s hard to remain professional, but you do. no furrowed brows, no scrunched up face— nothing but a tight, forced smile.
you suck in a breath through your nose, maintaining composure. “what makes you think it isn’t me, mister braun?” he can hear the tinge of vexation in your voice. clearly, this footballer has struck a chord or two.
“you’ve got pink gloves on, barbie.” he snarks out a laugh, just a bit mean. he’s much too handsome for such a condescending tone.
you bring a gloved hand flat to his chest, pushing reiner back into the examination table. his breath catches in his throat when you knead your fingers into his thigh, right where the tear resides beneath firm muscle. you’re assertive, and goddamn, does he love it.
“i’m your doctor.” you assure, voice firm. he groans out at the calculated pressure; it feels good. makes the throb of pain fade, just a bit.
“you’ll have to put some faith in me, hm?” your tone is warm, words soft and patient in a way he doesn’t deserve. reiner can’t lie, it was crass of him to have undermined you that way.
“my apologies, doc.” he addresses you in the rightest way he can. it’s his tiny little way of making amends.
“so, how long— fuck, how long did ‘ya study for?” reiner tries for small talk, voice low and shaken. you’d like to believe that whatever left his lips just now wasn’t a moan. no, it was more like . . . a groan of pain, perhaps?
“about six years. graduated early,” no wonder you look just about his age, if not younger. all his previous doctors were just as old as his parents.
“smart and pretty, huh?” he graces you with a feeble grin, a white gleam of teeth surrounded by neatly trimmed stubble. it’s safe to say that he’s your hottest patient up to date.
you continue on with prodding into the thick meat of his left thigh, and those throaty whines of his make you feel a way you simply shouldn’t.
it’s been a while since reiner’s been touched this way. he knows it’s just a regular inspection for his stupid injury, but he can’t recall the last time a woman’s splayed their hands on his body. he’s always busy with football this, training that. there’s never any time remaining for hook-ups, talkless of a relationship. that being said, it isn’t long before he begins to grow excited.
“m— mister braun,” you call out, voice airy, “you seem a little, um . . . worked up.”
“huh?” his eyes flit up to meet yours. you lock onto his honey-brown pools of desperation.
nothing else is uttered. you wordlessly direct your gaze towards his crotch, and give him a knowing look. reiner finally catches on— he fucking knew he felt his bottoms getting tight. hesitantly, the blonde lifts his head to peer down at his pants. surely enough, a boner’s prodding at the centering cloth of his football shorts.
“goddamn,” he drops his head back onto the examination table, bashfully throwing his forearm over his eyes. humiliation eats at the proud man, reducing him to a jumble of hormones.
you can hardly bring yourself to contain your chuckle, which makes his reddened cheeks burn further. it seems that his bodily reaction to your skilled hands has given him a sense of humility at best, and embarrassment at worst.
“i’ve never been appointed to a lady before . . .” is his hushed excuse. he’s still got his eyes shielded with his arm— he can’t even fucking bear to look at you. it’ll only spur him on further.
‘i turn you on?’ is what you’re just longing to question him. you know that you do— he’s been looking at your lips with bated breath since he got here. not to mention the peeks he’d taken at your ass whenever you turned around to read his chart or grab a cotton ball.
it’s quite bold of you— more like dangerous— to bring your ministrations upwards, closer to the ache under his pants. you’d tell yourself to stay on task, but professionalism has long been thrown out the window.
your gloved hands trail mischievously, placed directly atop reiner’s hard-on. warmth radiates from your palm, and you squeeze. his eyes blink shut, hips gently bucking upwards. his tear burns from beneath his skin, but he doesn’t fucking care. he bets he could cum from your hands alone.
reiner eventually manages to pull his arm away from blocking his viewpoint, chest heaving with every passing second. if you were to use your stethoscope on him, his heartbeat would be nothing short of erratic.
“trust me, mister braun,” is your reassuring whisper, “you’re in good hands.”
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miguelhugger2099 · 4 months
Text
Little Miguel, Big Miguel (Pt. 2)
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Summary: Miggy meets a few people and he finally grabs the chance to speak with you again. Previous This chapter was so hard to write oml Art in the middle by LBY2K99 Miguel x GN!Reader, fluff, lowkey crack, not proofread at all, Word Count: 3, 106
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Eventually Miggy and Jess walked through the entrance of the cafeteria, the threshold being much larger than he expected with various spiders on high beams or on a string of web. Others were normal and sitting at the many tables and booths the place had provided. 
Was that a T-Rex?
“You hungry?” She peered down at him after walking in front of a counter. Miggy shrugged despite his stomach growling.
“I could eat,” He huffed when Jess shoved a tray in his hand, a burger that had his variant’s mask plastered on the bun. His eyebrows raised in surprise. “Huh. A little more conceited than I thought.” He mumbled to himself. 
“Hi, guys!” Jess walked past and called out to a group of people sitting at a booth. They all turned and greeted her back before all of their eyes landed on Miggy. He squirmed slightly as Jess walked in front of him and Miggy followed hesitantly behind.
“Bloody hell. Did the boss shrink? That's jokes.” One smirks, chuckling to himself, his voice smooth and deep that melted nicely with his British accent. 
The other three are slack jawed, not believing what they’re eyes.
“Did he shrink?!” One with a blue headband gasps.
“No, Miguel didn’t shrink,” Jess rolled her eyes. “This is our new recruit, Miguel, obv–obviously. He's getting used to the place so,” Her hand stretches out to list their names. “Hobie, Pavitr, Miles and Gwen.” 
“Is no one finding this strange?” A teenager that looked a little older than him spoke out, his suit completely black except for the red stripes running down his arms. Miles, Miggy made sure to remember. “It's Miguel but…pocket sized.” The girl next to him softly smacks his chest with a warning look.
“He's a kid, Miles. We've met other variants of ourselves before so this shouldn't be different.” Her eyebrows furrowed and the metal piercing by her right glinted underneath the fluorescent lights. Gwen.
Miles pouted. “At least my variant was the same age.” He mumbled under his breath.
Gwen smiles. “Nice to meet you, Miguel.” 
“Ah–actually. You guys can call him Miggy or anything other than Miguel. Just to avoid confusion for the time being.” Jess intervenes awkwardly, helping Miggy into a seat by Miles and Gwen. All of them give their own greetings, welcoming Miggy in despite the strangeness of seeing a more timid and kid version of the man in charge.
“Qué tal?” Miles leans back in his chair.
Miggy brightens up. “Hablas español?” He asks Miles. Miles sits up, wide eyed and suddenly nervous.
“Y-yeah, I know un–un poquitito, y'know.” There was still a bit of an accent but Miggy didn't mind, simply chuckling and nodding, subconsciously showing off his sharp fangs when taking a bite of his burger.
“Woah, were those fangs?” Pavitr leans over the table to take a closer look. Miggy leans back. “Are they retractable too?”
“Uh, no. It’s–it’s just like that.” Miggy chuckled awkwardly after swallowing.
“How long you been Spider-Man for?” Miles asks and turns to him.
“Ah…almost a year, pretty sure.” He kept eating, taking another few bites.
“Are you on rapture?” Hobie tilts his head with a raise of his eyebrow, almost with a hint of concern in his eyes.
Bug-eyed and jaw slacked, Miggy snaps his head to Hobie, nearly choking on himself. “No!” He sputtered while Hobie nodded and leaned back as he relaxed. “Shock, what is wrong with you guys?” He wheezed out.
Pavitr laughs. “I like this new little boss.”
“He don’t got a stick up his arse, that’s for sure. Makes him ten times better than the geezer.” Hobie plays with his bottom lip ring.
“Be nice.” Jess warns with her arms crossed.
“I am nice. That was my nicest, actually.”
Jess’s phone pings in her pocket and she checks her alarm. “Shoot. I need to go. Miggy,” He turns his head to her. “We’ll have to finish orientation another time. I gotta head home. Guys, if you could just keep an eye on him till the end of the day?”
The group of young spiders nod up at her, all responding with their own variations of responses. Jess gives a lingering look to the group, eyeing them down to make sure she can trust them. Deeming them good kids, she sighs and waves, walking away to open a portal back to her dimension. Miggy shrinks in his seat, now being with semi-strangers and the only person he kinda knew in this place, left.
After she leaves, all of them begin to ask more questions like how old he was, if their Miguel’s universe was similar to his universe, etc, etc. Miggy tried his best to answer ease their curiosity with a gentle yet nervous smile. It had been a while since so many people have been kind to him.
Gwen mentions your name after thinking for a moment. “Do you think they know about him?” Miggy’s ear perks up at the mention of you. Where were you anyway? Did you leave? He wanted to see you again.
“Not if Miguel allows it. I can see him getting mad about this.” Pavitr rests his chin in his palm.
“Be a bit freaky if I were to see ‘em together anyway. Since they’re always around the big man.” Hobie crosses his arms on the table.
“I don’t think it’d be freaky. Everyone’s making a big deal about this.” Gwen frowns. Miggy droned out their talking, his eyes searching side to side to find and exit. Don’t get him wrong, these are nice people and he can see himself being friends with them, he just…really needed to see you.
Or maybe it was an excuse to escape their gossiping while in front of him.
Miggy slipped from his seat and escaped the flurry of whatever the hell they were saying while they chatted amongst themselves. He used his webs to swing himself to the ceiling with a small fwizz coming from his wrists. His claws poked out, clutching onto the metal as he crawled away, avoiding Spider-Monkey and out of the threshold. He failed to notice a pair of eyes watching his exit.
He hopped off the wall and landed on one of the many beams the building provided. Miggy took a few glances around him to make sure no one could bother him when he lifted his wrist to his face. He hesitantly raises a finger to the screen. Even though it looked like his universe tech, he still had no clue how it operated. Deciding not to break it accidentally, he brought it close to his lips. “Hey, miss…AI lady, ma’am?” He whispers to the watch.
Lyla suddenly popped up on top of the screen, her holographic body standing in front of many tiny floating monitors. Miggy yelped, covering his mouth with his other hand.
“What’s up little boss? Got a question? And no, you’re not allowed on any mission. You’re on babysitter protocol.” Lyla didn’t look up at him, choosing to look at each file and trashing the ones she deemed unimportant.
“Babysitter?” Miggy scrunched up his face in disdain.
She yawned. “Big boss doesn’t want you out and about to other universes yet. Sorry, kid. Now if you’ll excuse me–”
“Wait, wait! No! That’s–that’s not what I was gonna ask.” He panicked, gripping the watch with his hand. Lyla’s heart sunglasses slid down her nose as she turned her head over her shoulder to face him. “I was just gonna ask about…” He saw your form leave Miguel’s corridor before bumping into another spider person he didn’t recognize for a quick chat. He felt his little heart speed up and smiled. “...them.”
Miggy and Lyla both peered down to watch you smile and laugh with the other spider-man. Miggy noticed a redhead baby in his arms. Lyla glanced at him, back to you and then back to him. She stood up straight and crossed her arms after sliding her shades back on her nose bridge. “Oh, they’re way too old for you, kid.” Miggy frowned at the holographic lady. You had finished talking with whoever that was and waved him and the baby goodbye. Miggy’s heart raced as he prepared himself to jump off the beam.
“Whatever, pequeñita. Don’t need your help anymore. Catch a virus or something.” Miggy grinned mischievously down at her while Lyla gasped in shock.
“Hey–!”
Miggy switched her off and quickly used his webs to stick to the ceiling and swung down behind you, landing on his feet with a quiet thump. Hearing that sound, you turned around to check to see Miggy had stood up on his feet with a toothy smile. The sides of his hair had fallen out of place and he tucked it behind his ear as he walked up to you.
“Hey.” He placed his hands on his hips and puffed up his chest to appear more muscular. You huffed a small laugh, crossing your arms and tilting your head as you looked at him.
“Hi there. I didn’t think we’d meet again so soon.” You decided to amuse him. Miggy shrugged.
“Guess it was fate,” You snorted but Miggy continued anyway. “I was wondering if you had time for a chat? This is your universe I'm assuming? You could show me around the city. Maybe grab a snack together.” He grinned, looking at you with an innocent expression. But you knew better. Miguel would try the same thing in his own version once in a while.
“Uh-huh, yeah, right. Where’s Jess?” You placed your hands on your hips. Miggy stiffened but recollected himself.
“Busy.” He said, technically not lying.
“Sure,” You dragged out. “Well, I thought you came from a similar universe. I don’t think there’d be much new stuff to show you, kid.” You give him a playful pointed look with a tilt of your head. Miggy tsked, poking his cheek with his tongue in annoyance. He didn’t like you thinking he was just some kid. He was more than that, he’d prove it!
“Well, I beg to differ. I’m naturally curious, y’know. It’s one of my charms so I’d like to see if you’re right.”
“So you don’t believe me?” You raised your eyebrow.
Miggy hummed in thought, looking off to the side. “Not at all. Just a test.” He grinned.
You rolled your eyes playfully. “Alright, I’m not doing that,” Miggy’s face dropped. “But I am just heading home really quick and then coming back here. So, if you want, you can join me.” You offered and his face brightened up.
“Yeah! Yeah–sure, sure. That I can totally do.”
“Great. It’s actually not far from here so we could just walk to—”
“Woah, woah, woah. Walk? If you hadn’t noticed, I’m Spider-Man.” Miggy gestured to himself with a smug smirk, but your face didn’t falter.
“I see that.”
Miggy pouted. “I can carry you.”
You waved him off. “That’s really not necessary. I know you’re strong but–” You yelped as you felt Miggy grab your waist and pull your close. The height difference was a little awkward but he didn’t seem to mind one bit. He wanted to prove to you he was capable and strong. His webs shot out and stuck to the walls, swinging the both of you around while he tried finding an exit with a determined look. You wrapped your arms around him, hoping to the universe that you wouldn’t fall, and he felt his heart race a little faster.
“Directions, please!” He exclaimed, a smile in his voice while you screwed your eyes shut. You eventually felt the wind in your hair and the far away sounds of hover cars zipping past. “That’s new!” He dodged the cars with stealth, clutching you tighter to him.
Your legs became shaky and as soon as your feet touched the ground of your patio, you fell to your hands and knees with a giant huff. Miggy landed beside you, letting you take a breather.
“Estas bien?” He asked gently, his voice much softer than the persona he tried to maintain. He knelt by your side, hugging his knees to his chest.
“Fine, fine. Just…don’t do that again.” You helped yourself up and walked inside after opening the glass door. Miggy followed behind you, slightly embarrassed. He glanced around the area, seeing a void of color all around. Simple grays, blacks, and whites as the palette for couches, walls and the like. It was super different compared to back home. His mom usually did the decorations. Miggy thought this room felt very cold.
“This is your home?” He asked, feeling like this was a stark difference from your personality.
“Yeah, well kind of. I live here with someone.” You reply, rummaging through some things in a different room. Miggy perked up, his lips turning downward and feeling jealous.
“Who?” He asked, looking around to see if he could find anything that showed two people lived here.
You didn’t respond. Maybe you didn’t hear him, maybe you did. Miggy was distracted anyway as he walked slowly around the living room. In the corner of his eye, he saw a box that was out of place on one of the selves by the giant holographic TV. He strolled towards it, its dark purple color being the only thing attracting him.
“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t go around touching things.” Your voice was heard behind him, making Miggy jump. He took a big step away from the box, becoming more curious but he respected you enough. “I thought you would’ve had enough manners to not go snooping in someone's home.” You tossed him a soda and he caught it, seeing that the name brand was slightly spelled different from his own dimension. He found it a little unsettling; still getting accustomed to everything.
“Sorry.” He mumbled, popping open the can with his talon. “What did you get?”
You shrugged. “Some things to help out the society.” You walked towards the couch and sat on the far right to rest yourself on the armrest. “Just give me a minute and we’ll head back.”
Miggy nodded along, shifting his weight from side to side. “What…are you to the society?” He asked quietly, almost afraid he’d offend you.
“What do you mean?” You looked over at him, patting the side next to you to offer him a seat. Miggy walked over and sat by you, a little farther than what you offered.
“Like…you’re clearly not a spider person, much less some powers, but yet you’re in the society. You know all those people yet you’re…a civilian?” You nodded.
“Yeah, I’m just a regular person. I can’t climb walls or shoot webs but…I think I have a right to be there.”
“You said you were special. What does that mean?” He peeked over at you, his soda faintly fizzing.
You avoided his question. “How about you tell me about yourself instead?”
Miggy tilted his head. “Me?” He asked. “But…I don’t think I’m much different from your ‘other me’.”
You waved him off. “I’m sure there’s some difference. C’mon, don’t be shy. I wanna know about the newbie.” You cross your legs and turn to face him.
Miggy looked apprehensive, not really sure if it’s the right time to spill his life story but you asked so he caved in.
“Well, I was bitten trying to save my, uh, bully.” He looked down at his drink and took a small sip. Your smile dropped.
“You were bullied?”
Miggy nodded. “Well, yeah. It, uh… didn’t end well,” He rubs the side of the can. “There was this huge explosion when checking out the spiders in Alchemax– my dad used to work there,” He doesn’t look up at you. “My dad’s boss and his kid were there. His son bullied me, sure, but when that explosion happened, somewhere in between I got bit and…I dunno,” He sighed, a clear heavy weight on his young shoulders. “Kron was there and I tried–I did– and I don’t even know why I did but he still…y’know.” He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s fine. I mean, it’s not fine but even though he died, he bullied me. But it doesn’t mean he should’ve passed, y’know? Then I woke up and they said my dad died too so it was all confusing back then.” He leaned back on the couch with a heavy sigh.
“I’m…so sorry,” You apologized grimly, guilt eating you up for asking. Miggy looked over at you and gave you a reassuring smile, his fringe falling out of place.
“It’s fine. It happened a while ago. The feeling is still there, just a little less. You didn’t hurt me, promise.” He then chugged the rest of the soda down his throat, feeling the fizz bubble down to his stomach. He crushed the can right after, his talons digging into it and showed you the marks he made. “I got sick powers and I can help my family more now. When they’re in trouble I can just put on the suit and make sure they’re safe.” He beamed with pride and you mirrored the same expression.
“You love your family?” You asked gently, taking the can from his hand and getting up to place it in the recycling bin.
“Mhm!” Miggy nodded. “Since the explosion, we all became a little more tight knit. My mom especially. She became more protective over my little brother since he’s still super little.” He looks up at you as you come back.
“What’s his name?” You hide your smile since you feel you know the answer.
“Gabriel.” Miggy beams. “He’s practically my shadow, which mom doesn’t like. Says I’m too reckless and doesn’t want him to be like me.” He blew raspberries to signify his mild annoyance at the thought.
You laugh and grab a backpack full of things that Miggy assumes were the things you came to collect. “After you swung me around, I think I agree with her.” You joked.
Miggy shot up from his seat and pouted. “Not cool.” But he enjoyed the way you smiled. “Gonna head back out now?”
Nodding, you slip the backpack on and walk with him back to the balcony. “Yup. Whenever you’re ready.” You look at him expectantly. He went a little wide eyed.
“You want me to swing us back?” Lost on why when you screamed earlier.
“Well, I’m prepared this time.” You and Miggy smiled at one another and he looped his arm around your middle. Your hands around his neck and he stuck his web to a building, jumping off the balcony and swinging back to HQ.
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A/N: Please forgive me for this mid chapter i'll try to make the next one better i promise
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squidwen · 3 months
Text
🐙After Hours with Azul
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•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
Synopsis: You spend a lot of time at the Mostro Lounge, and Azul’s starting to wonder why. You’re not some creepy stalker girlfriend, are you? You two might be “official,” but you’re at the Lounge all the time!
However, Azul reckons there’s a reason behind it that’s deeper. More serious. After taking you to his room, the pair of you snuggle up, arms, legs, and tentacles, and Azul’s hearts simply can’t take the real reason behind your frequent visits.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
You preferred the Mostro Lounge after-hours. It seemed more like an actual Lounge, with nothing but the cool lights and the final tunes of the piano player on the stage. No one bothered you either. None of the waiters told you to leave. No one even offered to clear your drink and plate away. The staff cleaned their tables, hung up their aprons, and that was that.
Except for Azul.
He got up from the piano and crossed the Lounge over to your booth. Your breath hitched at his cool hand on your shoulder. You always preferred him without gloves. His hands were beautiful; long, slender fingers with a callous on his right middle one from years and years of endless writing.
‘Another evening claimed by my establishment,’ mused Azul.
At last, you moved. His words thawed you enough to stand.
Azul welcomed you into his arms. His other hand sparked against your ribcage as he rubbed circles into your back. Somehow his chilly touch melted you. You became almost gelatinous in his embrace, as if you were the octopus rather than the warm, sweet little human.
‘You’re coming here more often, angelfish,’ Azul said.
‘Naturally. The foods good and the music’s even better.’
‘I’m sure the music is not better.’
You pulled away.
Azul held onto you. ‘Sorry-’
‘You’re still doing it.’
‘It’s a bad habit.’
‘You need to stop thinking you’re not good enough.’
Your kiss on the shell of his ear silenced any protests. Azul shivered with bliss.
Everyone else had already left; there was no point in keeping up airs. Who would you be trying to impress? Azul was stronger than he looked. Although he masqueraded as a human, he still retained most of his cecaelian strength, and he lifted you out of the booth. You felt as though you were floating. You were as weightless as the exotic fish in the giant Lounge fish tank.
Azul tucked you into his chest, one arm under your legs and another under your back. You smelled his cologne; lavender and something that reminded you of the sea. The tips of his bangs tickled your forehead. Together, you slipped out of the Lounge and through the halls of Octavinelle, hiding around corners for the coast to be clear before ploughing on towards Azul’s bedroom.
A snap of the fingers and the door swung open.
A lilac bed, freshly made, beckoned you forward. Azul laid you gently down. The duvet and mattress moulded to your figure, gasping and depressing as you wriggled your shoes off. ‘I can’t believe you had the energy for that!’ you laughed. ‘After playing all night.’
Azul laid down beside you. His hands, warmed by your back and thighs, searched for yours and brought them to his lips. ‘It’s the nature of octopuses to be dextrous, my dear. Three hours of piano playing was nothing but a warmup.’
‘How modest.’
Azul reddened.
You kissed his nose. ‘Tell me more. If you can brag to anyone it would be me. Not that I need to be told about how amazing you are. You just carried me up to the top of Octavinelle as if it was nothing. I bet Jack couldn’t even do that.’
Azul, however, did not bring up anything. It still didn’t feel right to. Not with you. Not yet. He was still so new to this. He had never loved anyone before, and the pair of you had only made your relationship official a few weeks ago. Azul was trying to strike a balance between impressing you, and boasting. He wanted to seem cool, not conceited. You already accepted him for what he looked like… for some reason, but surely there was only so much you could take. You could tolerate ugliness, but vanity?
‘A good businessman never puts all his cards on the table,’ said Azul.
You rolled your eyes. ‘Business talk? Here?’
Shoot, Azul thought. Play it cool. ‘You are in the bedroom of the dorm leader of Octavinelle and the manager of the Mostro Lounge.’
‘I thought I was in my boyfriend’s bedroom.’ You started to pull away again. Azul gripped you tightly. His strong fingers were like suction cups. ‘Come on, Azul,’ you sighed. ‘If you’re a businessman, does that make me a customer? Or some associate? I know this is new to you. It’s new to me too. But just… let yourself be… well, mine. Even if it can only be in this room. I need that.’
You shifted closer to him and snaked your arm under his head. His ear rested in the crook of your elbow, letting your fingers fiddle with his hair. The fedora fell away. His locks were stringy from hours under a hat, but you didn’t mind. It was like his head was a giant snowdrop; the petals stuck together as it tried to bloom after a long winter.
Azul drew closer. The bed creaked.
‘My angelfish,’ he breathed.
You hummed.
‘Why do you stay at the Lounge for so long?’
Your stroking stopped.
Azul tensed. ‘If you don’t want to say then-’
‘No, no. It’s fine. It must seem creepy, like I’m some crazy stalker girlfriend who watches your every move now that we’re together. But it’s not. Seven, it’s not. I just… it’s just a soothing place. Some people like the library. Others like the park. But the Mostro Lounge is perfect for me. I’ve been going there all year just to unwind. You might not have noticed. You’re always so busy.’
‘No other reason?’
It was your turn to tense.
Azul detected it immediately.
Sitting up, his cerulean eyes pierced into you like icicles. He was the businessman again. All the tenderness had been leached out of him. Something was wrong. He knew it. Something he was determined to get to the bottom of. It wasn’t that he didn’t like you being at the Lounge. He loved it. Your presence always made him play better, and he was happy to smuggle you on-the-house desserts whenever he could. But you had been showing up too often, as if you were hiding, or escaping, something.
‘Let’s not have secrets from each other,’ he said.
‘Secrets?’
‘Please, angelfish.’ Azul blinked and his eyes became gentle again. The eyes of a lover; lidded and pleading. To prove that he was being open – and to give you permission to do the same – he lay down beside you again and transformed back into a cecaelia. His skin speckled with lilac until it was completely purple; his legs unravelling into eight black and purple tentacles.
Azul couldn’t meet your eyes as he transformed. It embarrassed him. He felt so grotesque. So hideous. But then, you came to him again, and wrapped your arms around his torso. The feeling faded. Azul took you into his arms.
The tentacles wound around your legs like ribbons around maypoles. Cool and slick; the suction cups kissing your exposed skin, making it prickle with gooseflesh. You stayed still to invite them higher. Azul delighted in the feel of you. You were more detailed when he held you this way. He sensed every inch of you. You were beautiful, and more tentacles came up to bind you.
Around your waist. Around your hips. Around your stomach. With ease, they pulled you in close to Azul. The cecaelia buried your face in his chest. You could hear his three heartbeats. They were fast. You couldn’t help but smile into Azul’s shirt.
‘Are you comfortable, my darling?’ Azul asked.
You nodded, too relaxed for words. Azul’s touch was velvety soft. All your dark bindings were gentle and plush, like a caterpillar wrapped in a chrysalis.
A final tentacle cupped the back of your head. You shivered as the suction cups kissed your scalp. The feeling wasn’t unpleasant, but it brought you out of your comfort just enough to feel like talking again. ‘What about you?’
‘I’m at my best when you’re with me,’ Azul said.
You melted a little more. ‘Same here. And I confess, that’s the reason why.’
‘Why what?’
‘I’m sorry. I know I’ve come on too strong and I’ve spooked you.’
‘No, not at all.’
‘I just…I… you know you’re my best friend.’
Azul’s heartbeats got even faster. ‘A-And you’re mine,’ he breathed. ‘The Leech twins… they’re not the same as you.’
‘The others aren’t the same as you either. Don’t get me wrong, Ace and Deuce are great, but they’re like twins, and Jack and Epel are dedicated to sports, and Sebek’s obsessed with Malleus. I sort of feel like I just touch-base with them, but I spend time with you. And even if it’s not “with” you, just to see you, hear you play, admire who my partner is, even just sit in your Lounge, is enough.’ You mustered the strength to crane your head back and kiss his jaw. ‘I’m millions of miles from home, but I somehow feel there when I’m with you.’
Azul had never heard anything like it. You were so sweet. So kind. No one ever complimented him without wanting his attention, or recognition; without wanting something in return. Octavinelle was full of sychophants, none bigger than the Leech twins, but you… you were as pure as driven snow. You loved every inch of him, inside and out; something Azul had thought was impossible for him to find. To deserve.
His tentacles bundled you up even more, pressing you in close until it was almost uncomfortable. His suction cups kissed you. Thousands of kisses. Small pecks, until the tentacle cupping the back of your head lifted you to Azul’s lips.
Velvet. Smooth. Soft.
When you broke away, you were both breathless, and exhaustion descended upon you. The night had been long; the conversation hard. Azul loosened his grip on you but kept his tentacles in place. He could think of nothing sweeter than to fall asleep to the feeling of you, and you didn’t mind. You had never been so comfortable; so warm and welcome.
With a final kiss, you snuggled into your cecaelia and drifted off to sleep, lulled by the rhythmic thump of Azul’s heartbeats.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
Author note: Well hey! It’s been a while!
I hope you enjoyed the fic! I had to write an Azul one after being away for so long! He’s by far my fav character, and it was his birthday recently so I think we’re all in Azul-mode atm.
If you liked it, please like, comment, and share.
- Squidwen
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bloodywankers · 1 year
Text
Trigger Warning! Yandere! Implied Non-Con! Forced Marriage! Forced Cultural Assimilation! Power Imbalance! Royalty AU!
Yandere Blue Lock | Yandere Michael Kaiser | 5.4k words | unedited
Michael Kaiser was arrogant, and surpassed all reason with his gall. As if it had not been your people who had fed and clothed his own when their ship sank near the coast of your island.
Provided them with shelter and welcomed them with open arms when they had nowhere to go in the vast ocean.
Whether it was gold or medicine, you wasted no expense to extend your generous hand towards them, ensuring your guests stayed comfortably while within the confines of your island.
Their culture was strange to you who had grown up in a matriarchy, surrounded by warriors and women admirable in both strength and intelligence. In fact, it was the opposite of your own. Men were the ones who held most of the power in their country, no wonder they looked so flabbergasted when there were no other men on the island beside themselves, surrounded by well built women tanned under the scorching sun, beyond anything they were used to as they had said many times.
They weren’t as bad as many stories told, they shared whatever was spared from the ocean on their ship, blankets, food that you had never come across and strange trinkets you still couldn’t fully understand.
Kaiser was strange even when you first met him, commanding those around him so naturally unlike you who was egalitarian in the making. Treating everyone with equal consideration and respect. Conceit lining his every action, as if he looked down on all those that surrounded him.
Had it not been for them not having anywhere else to go, you wouldn’t have let them near your people, especially not when it was evident he looked down on you.
“Your ‘country’ is run solely by women?” He seemed almost indignant when presented with this information. Despite this, you still bid them farewell with a smile on your face and nothing but prayers of good fortune for the journey that lies ahead of them.
So imagine your surprise when you receive a letter, a threat, the familiar arrogance dripping from each sentence written in the paper. ‘Surrender or else.’ That was basically what he was saying, that bastard. Acting as if your people hadn’t done all they did for his own.
But yours was a country of warriors, you’d fight them even if it cost your lives.
Or so you had thought, but the enemy never came. Instead, your numbers fell from within, one after another, all those around you fell ill, weakened until they could barely stand. You had barely managed to contain the infection when he came, that coward.
“You don’t seem to be doing very well.” He taunted, grinning from ear to ear as he looked down on you.
“A country run by women… isolated from the world. I was wondering for how long that’d work out for you.” He said as he walked circling around you, as a hyena would to its prey. He spared a few glances towards your surroundings, examining the sickly state many, including you were in. A rather cruel idea came to mind as he looked into your eyes, that defiance, sheer hatred that lined them, he wondered if he could crush it, like taming a wild animal in a sense.
“You’ll all die at this rate, why not come with me? The old geezer’s been pestering me lately to get married and I think you'd do nicely [name]. What do you say?” Even as he suggested something as serious as marriage, he had a certain playfulness in his tone, as if he was just mocking you, waiting for you to say yes just to laugh in your face.
“Even at a time like this you seem to spare no opportunity to mock us.” You spat back at him, not having braced yourself for the bruising hold on your jaw he now had.
“I’m sorry, I think I should rephrase that, I made it sound like I almost gave you a choice.” And with that, he released your aching jaw and walked out, you could overhear him ordering one of the men that came with him and while you didn't understand their language, you could assume it had something to do with you.
….
While most of the girls were against it, they understood you had no choice unless they were willing to face off against those strange men in their current condition. So it was decided, in exchange for treatment and protection from other invaders with similar intentions to Kaiser’s, you’d go with him. It felt dehumanising, to be traded like livestock but you didn’t want to think of what would happen had you opposed the idea as vehemently as you planned to.
Instead you focused on what to do once you reached his home country, it was a long journey, turns out that his men had settled on the just a few days on boat away from your island. His true home country, the one you learnt he would rule over was much further, a climate noticeably colder and duller than what you were used to.
“I expect you to be on your best behaviour once we get there, we wouldn’t want them to think you’re an uneducated savage, would we?” You despised how he spoke to you, slower, in a simpler way and overwhelmingly patronising, as one would to a child.
“I’m aware.” You replied.
He made you learn his country's language during the journey, so while he read government papers and complex books, he forced you to read children’s books out loud. Laughing at how you’d pronounce certain words, chuckle as you tried your best to differentiate between one sound and another and ensure you were thoroughly embarrassed before explaining anything you didn't understand.
He let you wear your own clothes at least, but even this, he assured, was only until you reached land, until he could have a tailor skilled enough to make something befitting of his future wife.
You couldn’t help but curse him under your breath every single day, pray he’d come down with sickness or fall overboard, pray he’d die, a slow painful death. But even this had to be done in secrecy, not because of how ill you wished him but because he forbade anything that held any semblance to your culture.
It was foolish to think he’d lose interest once you returned to his homeland, surrounded by enough women and shiny things to forget about you, men were fickle, or so the older women always told you. But not Kaiser to your dismay, instead he seemed even more invested in finding ways to make your life more difficult, from dance instructors to history and politics. Each day felt daunting as you missed your small island home, wanting for nothing more than to return to your home and your true family.
With what little you spoke of their language you could tell you weren’t the most welcome of guests, the maids’ glances towards you weren’t exactly overflowing in kindness and the older men that visited Kaiser seemed equally troubled by your presence.
“Who would dare say anything to my kaiserin.” There it was, the new nickname he had picked for you among a myriad of others, some more insulting than others. Not that Kaiser cared, he seemed to pay no mind to what you thought. Instead he seemed to be much more focused on your untouched plate.
“You’re not eating. I can’t have you looking like a corpse at our wedding, darling.” You just continued to stare down at your plate, its contents didn’t seem fit to be called food to you, not with how tasteless they were, even prisoners ate better in your homeland. You furrowed your brows as you took a bite, trying to chew as little as possible as to not taste any of it.
“I’m sure you’ve been taught better table manners than that, dear.” You didn’t like the way he looked at you, it’s as if he was looking at something lesser than him, lesser than human in his eyes.
“The food…I don’t like how it tastes.” You muttered under your breath in what little German you spoke.
“I suppose it’ll take time to develop an appreciation for high class food, I understand, especially after you’ve been eating garbage most of your life. No wonder you were so weak back then.” He never seemed to miss a chance to insult your culture. You were sure whatever garbage you had eaten before was much more filling than these scraps.
You had always enjoyed running around freely in the past, taking in the beauty of nature, but here, it would be rare to find any nature at all among the concrete jungle. And whatever little greenery there was was hidden by the accursed weather. Dull and gloomy, much like the country itself.
And god forbid your handmaidens let you out without hiding you among layers over layers of fabric, weighing you down just enough to make sure you would tire yourself out to not suggest going out for another few days.
But even that seems like a privilege to you now as you look out the large window in your room. He had come to visit earlier, drunk— clearly as seen from the pink in his cheeks and the unmistakable stench of alcohol coming from him.
“You’ll look so nice in a wedding dress, my precious kaiserin. I can’t wait to see you in white.” He said as he got closer than you’d have allowed, draping his arms around you as he sunk into the crook of your neck. You couldn’t help but scrunch your nose as he took in your scent. For an emperor as great as he claimed he was, he seemed to act a bit too depraved.
That’s when he went for it, tried to remove your dress. Your heartbeat racing as a mix of anxiety and dread overflowed from your thoughts as they clouded your judgement. In the midst of the moment, you shoved him away, ending in him being pushed onto your bed while you were now on the floor.
“What…?” He seemed angry, really, really angry. You didn't want to know what he would do so you just spewed whatever came to mind in hopes of something convincing enough to at least reduce whatever punishment he would give you now.
“The… The wedding! You have to wait. We should only do this after marriage. That’s what the priest said, we cannot do this unless we’re husband and wife!” You exclaimed as Kaiser simply looked at you, now having regained his composure.
You hoped this would buy you some time, at least enough to think of a way out without endangering the lives of your people. Your wedding was still a few months away, this would be enough time to do whatever was necessary.
Or so you had thought.
“Your highness, we cannot allow you to go out like this! Please understand, we’re under strict orders from the emperor. You must focus on your bridal studies. The tailor will also be coming today with the finalised dress.” The maid said, or rather pleased, she didn’t look any more pleased with the current arrangements as you were. That bastard, he moved your wedding from a few months to just weeks away after that. No wonder he had been so quiet lately. Everyone had begged that he rethink it but he paid them no mind, simply ordering that they prepare everything by the end of the month, sending everyone inside and outside the palace into a frenzy.
He didn’t forget to reprimand you for pushing him away either, forbidding anyone from allowing you outside the walls unless he himself allows it himself. Leaving you confined to your room most of the time, preparing for your wedding. Your stomach dropped at the mere thought of it.
Despite what he made you think, Kaiser was just as busy with wedding preparations as you were. Only the most grand event would be worthy of him and his precious wife. You used to be so aggressive when you first came, refusing to speak the language, firing insults at him every time he spoke. He found it adorable how you stuttered this time around. He did have to punish you for pushing him away, that was unacceptable, but the way you tried to reason with him, that desperate look in your eyes made him want to devour you right then and there.
It was rewarding to see the fruit of his labour.
It brought a smile to his face just to think about you.
“Have you heard? Apparently the empress is so beautiful that the emperor keeps her in a separate palace, he doesn’t allow any male servants near her so they aren’t seduced by your beauty.” A younger man, probably the son of a noble, seeing as how ignorant he was, said. The other men around him simply added more fuel to the fire as they continued to gossip amongst themselves.
The male couldn’t help but let out a dry chuckle. Would they have said the same thing had they seen you as you were back in your little island? Ragged and sickly, so ready to jump anyone that came too close to you as a string of curse words left your mouth. So unladylike, he was sure they wouldn’t.
None of them would have seen your potential like you did, he was the one who polished you into the gem that you were today so it’s only right he’s the only one to enjoy the benefits of it.
He’ll have to make sure you don’t have to interact with these scum too much during the wedding, Kaiser thought as he held himself back from ripping their tongues out right then and there, there were better, quieter ways to deal with people like that. No point in causing a commotion, especially when your wedding was so close, when you would finally have to resign yourself to your fate, sealed in his hands and his alone.
“Your highness please keep your arms up so that the tailor can fit the dress.” One of the maids said as a few others rustled around you, trying to fit the dress on you, ensure that it was safely fastened so as to avoid any accidents during your actual wedding.
“I hope you don't mind me intruding on your fitting session, my precious kaiserin.” Kaiser said as he invited himself in, his eyes set on you and the dress that just made you all the more alluring. Jewels that were worn by women of his family for centuries before this splayed all around the room as the maids tried to agree on the most fitting one and a dress made by the most prestigious tailor in the continent, all to represent his country, the mother of his nation.
The servants had all long gone now, leaving you alone with Kaiser. They giggled amongst themselves as they left, you had heard many talk about the lovely relationship between you two, oh how you wished to deny it all.
“You didn’t have to come.” You said, still insistent on avoiding eye contact with Kaiser.
“I can’t help but notice darling, you never seem to say my name. We’re to be wed soon, wouldn’t it be better for you to refer to your husband-to-be by his name?” You couldn’t understand why he seemed so intent in closing the distance between you two, as if to keep you from running off— not that there were any places where you could seek shelter from him and his overbearing presence.
Discomfort was evident in you as you tried to pry him away. It’d be hard to believe that you were the same person capable of taking out his men with relative ease. Kaiser, however, paid it no mind, instead leaning in closer as he took a hold of your chin, barely any distance left between you two, your breath hitching as you tried your best to divert the topic on to anything else.
“Come now, how hard can it be to say Michael, you’ve pronounced harder words darling, this should be easy for you.” He said leaning in even more. His lips practically on yours at this point, your efforts to pull away being left in vain as you hit the back of the sofa you were on.
“Michael, I said it, now please stop this!” You pleaded, but it would be difficult to reason with him now. Something about the way you said his name just felt so attractive to him. Maybe it was your accent, despite your best attempts, it was still hard to conceal it.
“Say it again.”
“W..what?” He looked like he was in a trance, no sign of his usual shit eating grin, a blank expression on his face as he stared back into your eyes, waiting for the words to leave your mouth.
“Michael.” You knitted your brows as your cheeks went red from embarrassment. It felt strange, demeaning almost. As if he were watching a child say its first words.
“Again.” Was he serious? You thought to yourself.
Hate Kaiser as you will, at the moment, he was the only one that could allow you to go out so in some messed up way, you had started to look forward to his visits. And with only a few days until your wedding, you couldn’t help but grow anxious so as insufferable as he was, at least you could enjoy a breath of fresh air, away from the stuffy palace in his presence.
You couldn’t help but take in the scenery, the same that seemed so lacking compared to your homeland just a few months ago
“That dress you wore earlier today suits you well, darling.” He said, eyes still focused on the freshly bloomed flowers.
“I’m sure it did, seeing how they had to practically starve me so that I could fit in it.” Your German had improved a lot lately, you could even use complex sentences now, not as insistent on using your mother tongue as you used to be, it brought him pride every time he heard you speak it.
“Stuffing your face like an uncivilised beast would be unbecoming of a lady of your standing regardless of whether there is a dress to fit into or not, my dear.“ Some part of you was convinced he did this so you wouldn’t have the energy to escape.
“I wasn’t aware basic human needs had become uncivilised in your glorious empire.”
“You’ve been behaving well lately, it’s in your best interest to keep that up, darling.” It had been ages since you last acted up, Kaiser had thought he had crushed your rebellious spirit by now. He could forgive this, maybe it was just you getting antsy because of your wedding.
You’d received many congratulatory gifts before your wedding, most from people you had never before met. Foreign emissaries, nobles and others, all filled with congratulations and well wishes but you spared them no attention, instead focusing on the letter sent to you by your friends and family back home, your real home. During the time it took for the letter to get to you it was already quite dated but you still read it over and over again, written in your home tongue and filled with words of encouragement. Details you feared you had forgotten, people who you couldn’t picture in your head anymore but longed for each passing day. Kaiser didn’t allow letters most of the time, especially not when they were written in your home tongue, a reminder of your unruly past as he saw it.
This one was a wedding gift, a final goodbye to your friends and family before you became someone even you couldn’t recognize.
You read it over and over again. Tears formed in your eyes as you realised just how much you had forgotten, turning into a sobbing mess before you even realised.
“Had I known this is how you’d act, I'd have thought twice before giving you that letter.” There he was again, so eager to interrupt any thoughts of your home.
“I- I’m sorry.” You managed to say between sobs, trying to compose yourself before he said anything else, carefully tucking the letter away into your study drawer.
“May I write back to them?” You asked, practically pleaded considering the pathetic state you were in.
“We’ve talked about this before, dear. You know I dislike repeating myself.”
“Only once please—! I won’t ask again, Michael please just this once—!”
He seemed displeased with your request but instead of saying anything, he merely got up and approached your desk. However, to your surprise, he simply walked past you, instead kneeling in front of your drawers, taking the letter out and before you could react, he ripped it to shreds, right in front of you. Not even sparing the remains, opting to throw them into the lit fireplace, making sure they were burnt to a crisp before facing you again.
He took out a piece of paper from his pocket, leaving it on the desk.
“W-what’s this?” It was hard to talk to him after what he had just done, you wanted nothing more than to curse him.
“A list of names I’ve narrowed down, choose the one you like most by tonight, otherwise I’ll choose the one I like most.” He said nonchalantly.
“Names…? Why would you need me to choose a name?”
He merely looked at you disdained.
“You’ve not been baptised yet, I can’t be marrying a heretic, dear.”
“Is it really necessary to change my name though?”
He slammed his hand on your desk.
“You were behaving so well up until yesterday, so you seemed to have forgotten under whose jurisdiction that beloved island of yours is, my dear.” And with that, he stole a small kiss from your lips and left.
None of the names on the list felt pleasant to your tongue, they all sounded so foreign so Kaiser ended up choosing for you, he seemed happy to do so anyway. Things moved fast from there, in under a week so much had happened. Everyone around you seemed so overjoyed, everyone except you who was intent on ignoring your reality. Repeating over and over again the words you had read in that letter as a desperate attempt to remember your homeland. With even your name now replaced, nothing besides fickle memories was left but even those seemed to fade so fast.
Time moved fast when you were trying to hold on to it, hours turned into mere seconds. It became hard to grasp something so intangible as you walked down an aisle surrounded by strangers, in a building equally as unfamiliar.
Ironically, the only thing that wasn’t foreign was Kaiser, the man that had dragged you out so far across the map in the first place.
As the priest had you decide words you couldn’t fully comprehend and as hundreds of eyes peered onto you, you couldn’t help but lean into his touch. Seeking what little comfort there was in them.
“All hail his highness the kaiser and kaiserin. May god bless their reign!” The man exclaimed as a string of cheers echoed through the large chapel, flower petals gently falling as the light from the stained glass windows of all colours seeped through.
Your breath hitching all of a sudden as you felt Kaiser’s hand on your waist.
“Nothing will save you today my darling bride.” He whispered into your ear with his usual devilish grin, his eyes still facing the guests.
You dreaded what was to come, his mere presence brought shivers to your spine. How were you supposed to spend the rest of your life with a man like that?
In the large ballroom, one after another, the guests greeted you, paying respects, asking if you remember them and their wedding gifs, each trying to outdo the last. But even in all the commotion, with the music drowning the room in even more noise, even then, your mind could only dread what awaited you once the music stopped and you were guided away.
You could feel it, his heartbeat. The constant thumping, mechanical like a clockwork in a sense. It wasn’t as erratic as yours, fast paced yes but you were sure the wine he downed earlier had something to do with that.
Reflexively moving away as he tried to inch closer, only to be met with a bruising grip, one fully intent on keeping you in place.
“Not today, my kaiserin, no. Today, I’ll enjoy all you have to offer and so will you. All you have to do is be good.” He said, barely audible as he looked at you with something between drunken stupor and sheer lust. Burying his head in the crook of your neck, taking a moment to breathe in your scent before his teeth sink in, you let out a hiss, trying your best to push him away or to at least have him stop but to no avail.
He took your home, your name—identity and that night, he took your body as well, leaving you with nothing at all.
He took all you had to offer and in turn left you with child, his child.
You only found out months later, as the sickness seemed to become too much to excuse as just a cold or upset stomach. As your dresses became increasingly difficult to fit into. And as if to add insult to injury, the physician thought it to be more important to inform Kaiser before he did you.
As if it wasn’t you who would carry this child for months to come.
“You’re the mother of my empire and now of my child as well, my kaiserin. You’ve brought me nothing but joy.” He said as he brought you into an embrace as the physician left.
But while Kaiser spewed affirmations of love and joy, you couldn’t help but feel guilty. Not when the first thought in your mind had been to compare his—your child to a parasite, like its father it would take and take from you.
Even beasts loved their kin, what a monster you had become to think that of your own child.
“Ahh.” You couldn’t help but wail. You didn’t want to bring such a child into the world, what a cruel mother you were. Uncontrollable sobs echoed through the room as you tried to cover your face, block out the man whose head up until mere moments ago laid on your lap, now looking at you with an unfamiliar expression of surprise. But it was quick to contort into something more akin to hurt and anger.
“…Why are you crying?” He whispered, the lack of his usual confidence and playfulness putting you off. His hands now firmly holding your face in place, leaving your tear stricken face with no choice but to face his.
“My first thought when I heard of the child…” You paused as more tears streamed down your face.
“I wished it’d die!” You exclaimed. “H-How can someone like me be a mother?”
“What have I become? What have you turned me into?!” You broke down once again, unable to see the sheer disgust in Kaiser’s expression, not until he forced your face up again.
“You’re carrying my child, the heir to my empire. You’d best act like it, my dear.” He scared you at times like these, when the familiar playfully hint in his eyes got replaced with a cruel look, one you would give your enemy, or someone you saw as less than human.
There was only one thing you hated more than that, it was when he acted like nothing happened the day after.
As he embraced you and his child, a smile wider than any you had seen before, acting as if you hadn't said what you did. As if you didn’t wilt away every day before your son's birth. He looked like him, like Kaiser. The same eyes, same hair, even his face held more semblance to him than you.
You sat in the shade, sheltered from the pathetic rays of sun if they could even be called that. Tea and other snacks set on the small table in front of you. Looking out the garden to see three young boys running around.
They laughed and chased after one and another, wooden swords and whatever the garden could provide turned into toys.
“I’m the emperor so I get to take all your land!” The eldest proclaimed.
“That’s not fair, you were emperor last time! This is my land, you can take Wilhelm land instead!” The youngest retorted, pointing towards his older brother.
“No! That’s not fair, you’re both cheating! Mother, tell them to stop, it’s my turn to be the hero!” Your second son, Wilhelm said, insisting you tell the other two off for cheating.
An airy buckle leaving your lips as you looked at the small boys, little, all three of them holding little if any resemblance to you.
“You two all got your turns, let’s let Wilhelm be emperor today, hmm?” The boys both let out a whine before they resumed their game, still equally as loud as before.
It was hard to face your children at times when you were reminded of when you first found out about your pregnancy. But you’ve learnt to bury those memories now. Between official duties and your children, there was little time for such thoughts in your day. Perhaps that was why you had forgotten all else.
You used to have a home but you remembered nothing of it, not what it looked like nor where you lived, maybe, if you tried really hard, you could recall its name.
There used to be people in your life before Kaiser but now, even if they were in front of you you doubted you would recognize them. It’s hard to hold onto memories when they’re so fleeting regardless of how hard you try. Not when even recalling them is an offence worth punishing in your husband’s eyes.
“Father!” Speak of the devil. The children screamed in unison, running towards Kaiser who had already opened his arms, welcoming them all for a hug.
They looked so innocent, unaware of the true nature of their father. Of course they would be when he stopped you from teaching them a single word in your home tongue, to utter a single word of your past would not be easily forgiven.
“My, if it isn’t my little princes.” He said between chuckles as the children tried to tackle him to the ground.
“Where’s your mother?”
“Mother is over there!” The youngest said, pointing his finger towards you. Kaiser giving you his classic grin. Taking the two youngest boys by the hand as he walked towards you.
As they walked side by side it was easier than ever to tell how much they resemble their father. Everything, from how they looked to even their names was foreign to you.
A chaste kiss on the cheek waking you from your trance as you looked behind you to find your husband and children, all smiling and laughing amongst themselves,
“What were you thinking to be so deep in thought?” He asked, receiving a simple ‘Nothing much.’ As a reply, interrupted by one of the children who seemed eager to jump on your lap and reach for sweets from the small table.
You doubt you’ll ever come to accept this life as your own, you’ll forever look into the mirror and try to recognize the stranger that you had become. But there was no home to return now, Kaiser had made sure of that, tearing it apart piece by piece, no people left on what was once your entire world, not when they all left for better opportunities to neighbouring countries. Nor did you have any pride, not when he tore it apart bit by bit.
Now you could only hope to be content, to one day entirely forget what you had known. To forget the pain of forgetting and to truly live in the present. Even if it’s with the man responsible for putting you through such pain.
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nyimasu · 10 months
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CONTENT WARNING! — eyes wide shut au, orgy, unprotected sex, voyeurism, pet names (love, sugar, baby), reader and geto have tattoos and you're a bit shy at first, praises, hair pulling, poly dynamics with gojo (what's new), lingerie kink, biting, secret pining, slight corruption kink, fingering, oral (reader receiving), cum eating, double penetration, all three of you get unhinged towards the end and break the orgy grandmaster's rules / WORD COUNT — 5.5k (pure brainrot)
ANYA'S CORNER — aesthetical hedonism to its finest, this work has been clearly inspired by stanley kubrick's last masterpiece, "eyes wide shut". also big shoutout to my love, @nagumoan for helping me throughout the various phases I had to come up with to finish this lmao love you dearly, loni!
P.S. : this fic is not proofread but I still hope you enjoy it! see you soon 🦋
REBLOGS ARE DEEPLY APPRECIATED!
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“What’s on your mind, Suguru?”
When you ask Suguru to do something different tonight, you realize your words backfire immediately because your dark-haired partner scoots closer to you on the sofa, his pupils dilating when you press a kiss to his lower lip. Then you wait for his response.
But the man is thinking so hard about your implicit request that his mind drifts away. Your sultry laugh brings him back to reality, though.
The man chuckles, amused by the hint of confusion in your question. "Nothing too wicked or extreme, my love. But what I have in mind for us might require you to get out of your comfort zone for a while. Are you still okay with it?"
You nod without hesitation, and your hand on his thigh brings Geto to smile, luring you closer to kiss you. Always so respectful and caring, your lover.
So, a couple of conceited phone calls from his part and a quick run to your wardrobe later, here you are, waiting in front of a wooden door to open to a villa— no, to a mansion probably built in the 19th century.
Tonight it’s shrouded in darkness and lush nuances of deep green, probably trees caressed by the capricious hand of the wind.
What a perfect night to find beauty and grace in you again, Geto thinks to himself. His eyes brim with mischief, his lips stretched in a smile under the white and golden mask he has on, while your gaze reflects the stardust coating the sky.
You are clothed in nothing more than a Venetian mask, a black coat, silvery high heels, and a set of lace lingerie your boyfriend is really fond of.
The aforementioned has your arm linked with his, and you both look at each other when the gates creak open.
Oblivious to his thoughts, you look up at him, and Suguru tilts his head towards the other masked couples before you.
“Let me introduce you to a whole new world. You haven’t seen anything like this before, not even in your wildest dreams. Come with me, love.”
Curious, you follow the rest of the guests and enter into the perfectly curated garden preceding the main body of the mansion, which soon welcomes you all with a cascade of candles covering every inch of the walls, starting from the corridor.  
“There’s nothing to be afraid of. I wouldn’t even think of putting you in harm’s way if I wasn’t sure you were going to be alright. You’re safe with me.”
You search for Geto’s eyes for reassurance, and he feels your gaze on him. He squeezes your hand oh-so lightly first, then stops right before you walk past the living room’s frame door.
The noise in the background doesn’t act as a distraction to either of you, so your partner simply shifts his grip from your arm to your lower back while he puts you at ease by saying:
“I know, of course. I’m not questioning that.” you reply right away, fidgeting with some of the rings of his dominant hand, the one wrapped around your waist.
Then you step forward to take in the smell of fresh flowers, tobacco, and other scents in the living room.  The staccato pace your heels set as you walk around to look at the candleholders scattered across the immense living room goes unnoticed, but not the swirls of ink on your body when the cloak slips to the side to reveal the tiniest sliver of skin.
“It’s just that this,” you punctuate the last word with a sigh, pointing at the opulence surrounding you. “I’m a bit intimidated by all of this. Everything screams expensive. I mean, look at these chandeliers! They’re magnificent, and I can bet my entire lingerie drawer that they're gold. Like, gold gold. Whoever owns the place is filthy rich.”
Now, that catches the attention of some of the guests, but you pass by them without noticing their stares on you. But your partner does, and he’s not the only one.
Your eyes are set on him only as you make your way back to Geto once more. Once you’re within reach, you feel his hand snaking up the cloak’s slit, and you giggle at the feeling of his feather-like touches on your thigh.
Do not get distracted, you reprimand yourself and gently take Suguru’s hand in yours to finish your sentence.
A muffled smirk follows your theory, probably because someone has made their presence known behind you. Alarmed, you turn and stare at the stranger. Somehow, the way they carry themselves is familiar to you, as if you’ve already met this person before.
And they’re tall.
Like, really tall.
On second thought, even their way of speaking sounds too much like the one used by another person you practically see every day.  
“Oh, sugar. Is this a legitimate bet? You know, I would love to have all your panties and bras in my bedroom. And to answer your question: yes, they’re gold gold. I’ve personally commissioned them to be made by the finest Italian craftsmen alive. They’re gorgeous, aren’t they?”
Before you can speak your mind, however, the masked person in front of you stops laughing after taking a look at your and Suguru’s intertwined hands; when they do, the stranger leans against the wall, an inch away from another candleholder. “Cuties.”
He only speaks that way with you and his closest friends.
Geto scoffs, his walk steady as he takes his place next to you. His arm links with yours again before shifting attention to the stranger.
Well, you two are not such strangers to them after all, because the lightness in your lover’s voice when he answers the stranger rings a bell.
“Do not change the subject, you freak. So, panties and bras, huh? You’ve never told me about this peculiarity of yours before. You want to wear, sniff, or jerk off with it?”
The masked one laughs again, this time while they clasp one hand around Geto’s forearm. It's big, all spidery fingers and gorgeous veins standing proud against their porcelain-like skin as the figure adjusts the cloak around their broad shoulders.
Girl, get a grip on yourself.
Shaking your head to push your horniness into a corner of your mind, you come to realize that you know them, and they seem to be quite intimate with you and Geto as well.
God, you have their name on the tip of your tongue, but it escapes you the moment you look at their attire. All your focus goes to their shiny patent leather shoes, and then up to their cloak.
Strangely enough, their robe is not pitch-black like yours. It's magenta-hued. And the mask? Oh, it’s almost as if it’s been dipped into liquid gold because the shimmer of it is just too bright and too real to be fake.
“Ah, Suguru. I would rather not say. A man keeps his secret stash of the finest food close to his chest. You of all people should know it, considering you keep the most delicious Zunda a breadth away from you.”
The stranger’s hood is down, and your eyes land on pure snow-white hair framed by the mask. But then, the person shifts closer to you and Suguru, and the lights shine on their entire figure. 
On their inhumane eyes.
Also, no one calls you “delicious Zunda” but him, a man with a terrible sweet tooth who happens to devour every single sweetery he finds in your house whenever he swings by to see his best friend.
No way.
Baffled, you sharply exhale and whisper: "You've got to be kidding me.”
The relationship between you and Geto is exclusive. Nevertheless, you both agreed to expand your horizons when the time and people involved felt right. And Suguru thinks tonight might be the night. Jealousy never pertained to him, especially when it comes to you.
You shove a hand under the person’s mask and lift it up by the chin. Behind the mask, there’s a pair of bright, light blue eyes staring right back at you, while plump lips curled in a shit-eating grin match Suguru’s hidden delight.
He let you take off his best friend’s mask because your lover knows that, deep down, you and the other man have some sexual tension you both need to work through.
You’ve never admitted it out loud, partially because you don’t want to hurt Suguru, but you’ve always found Gojo attractive, and the white-haired man has been doting on you ever since you and Geto started to date five years ago.
You’re so deeply in love with him —and he with you—that to have a stranger come between you is unthinkable. But a man Geto trusts with his life?
That’s another story.
He does feel, however, that the spark between you and his best friend is ready to ignite.
 “Gojo Satoru. I was hoping to spare myself the sight of your ugly face tonight; that’s why I asked Suguru to go out. But I didn’t think he would take me to your fucking place.”
Gojo stoops closer, his eyes boring holes in your face as he bends his knees to meet your fuming gaze. It brings him immense joy to see you in distress because of him, and you hate when either he or Geto get to your eye level. It makes you feel smaller, and you are already much shorter than them. Ugh.
If looks could kill, he’d be in a pool of blood at your feet by now.
My guests?
“Aw, is my little dove bothered by my presence? You didn’t tell her everything, did you, Suguru? Because if you did, she wouldn’t have come to us this easily. Well, enjoy your last moments of tranquillity while I help the rest of my guests get comfortable.”
The air whistles as Satoru puts on his mask again and walks towards the centre of the living room, his cloak floating behind him, akin to a king’s. And somewhat, he really is of royal blood, considering he’s one of the richest and most influential member of the Gojo clan.
Upon his arrival, the others wandering in the living room halt on the spot, and so does their chit-chat. The silence following Gojo’s entrance makes your blood evaporate.
What did you just walk yourself into?
“Before we start, I’d like to repeat some ground rules some of you may not be aware of.”
“Greetings, dear guests of mine. Thank you for coming to my abode. So, as you can see, I’ll be your grandmaster tonight.” he points at his golden mask and red cloak before continuing.
Contrary to your partner, modesty really isn’t Gojo’s strongest suit.
That last bit is directed at you, and you fight the instinct to give him the finger.
The snow-haired man raises a hand and puts down his thumb. “Rule number one: we never take off our masks. It’s mandatory, for it helps us conceal our identities. No one must try to pry out information about others. Whoever breaks this important rule will be kicked out.”
He’s going to drive you insane alongside Suguru, you can feel it in your bones. What are you saying? No need to fool yourself by feigning ignorance, at this point.
They always do.
Everyone nods to his words, and you roll your eyes, much to Geto’s amusement. Well, you have broken that rule, already.
“There’s no number limit of participants in the encounters, but I do warn you: I will be keeping an eye on each and every single one of you, so don’t do anything that will prevent the other parties involved to enjoy themselves. If you dare to do anything against your partners’ desires or act without explicit consent, you will be taken and kicked out.
His index finger is the second one to curl. “Rule number two: everyone keeps their cloaks on until I say so. As grandmaster of the evening, I have the right to decide whenever the fun begins,”
His eyes beam with unhidden delight under the golden mask, enhancing the ethereal hue, and they’re so breathtaking to look at that a few women close to him audibly gasp.
Have I been clear?”
A collective ‘yes’ follows the second rule, and you are beginning to understand this is not your normal Friday night. Once again, you look at Suguru, and he leans over you to hear you whisper,
“You brought me to an orgy.”
He sighs, ready to get you both out of here if he hears even the slightest amount of doubt in your voice. His voice is feeble when he asks: “Will you stay?”
You don’t respond right away, rather you rest your head against his shoulder as Gojo declares the third and final rule of the evening. He’s watching you and Geto like a hawk as his voice reaches everyone in the room, and the snarly remarks after he’s done confirms your hunch.
“Rule number three: as your grandmaster, I have the right to accept or deny your requests to partake in your liaisons. You cannot, however, refuse me. Especially you two.”
Your whole body freezes, and so does Suguru.
Gojo is pointing at you and your partner from across the room and, useless to say, many eyes are on the both of you as Satoru concludes his speech.
“The Sun Dragon and the Moon Lover are mine. No one will have them but me.”
Your spirit is on fire, enraged by Satoru’s claim, and when you finally answer Suguru, you work your jaw so hard that your muscles start to protest.
“I will stay. I want to smash his head against the wall. I hate him.”
Suguru kisses your hair. “You’re so bloodthirsty, my love, but no, you don’t hate him. In fact, I think you fancy him enough you might give yourself up to him tonight.”
“What are you talking abo-”
“Tsk-tsk”, he tuts. “Your mind and body hold no secrets to me. I know you better than you know yourself. Promise me this.”
He lifts his mask enough to let his lips rest in the crook of your exposed neck, right where your vein quivers under his touch.
“Smother him the same way you do with me. He's as crazy about you as you are of him and me. Do not hold back.”
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“Go, my guests. Search for beauty and grace.”
An hour has gone by since the orgy officially started and apparently, Gojo isn’t the only person you know at the party/orgy.
And your surprise knows no limits as you walk by yet another room, and a glimpse of sandy hair tells you the man who’s pounding a very pleased girl is someone you’re acquainted with.
Turns out that some of the guests are close friends of yours, as well. You can’t see their faces, of course, but their movements and voices are unmistakable, including the ones of a man you never thought you’d see there.
The same could be said about you, since you’re not the typical regular at orgiastic festivals.
“My love.” Geto gently urges you to stay quiet, because the others guests are watching you and who you know for sure to be Nanami Kento stare at each other while his hips stutter and his deep voice bounces off the walls in a long, “Fuck”.
Sensing your eyes on him, the man cocks his head towards you and the girl beneath him mewls in need.
Oh, my God.
His partner’s pathetic attempts to gain his attention fail again and you eventually walk away from the scene with Suguru by your side. You and your friend will have time to catch up later.
For now, you just need to get through the night in one piece.
Many guests keep staring at you and Geto, mainly because of the tattoos both of you display with such ease. Out of everyone, you and him are the most tattooed people in the mansion.
Suguru’s white dragon on his back and right arm compliments the black snakes wrapped around your thighs and part of the hips while the argent, celestial constellations starting from the base of your neck then falling onto the forearms like shooting stars balances out the vivid streaks of fiery dahlias that bloom across the entirety of Geto’s left arm.
The moment they come too close, the grandmaster is already there to confront them, sneaking an arm around your bare waist, or by standing so close to Suguru that the teeth of jealousy sink into your flesh over and over again.
Together, you make one hell of an attractive couple, and because of this, a couple of men and a woman tried to approach you and Geto.
All to no avail.
First, he called dibs on you and Geto. Then he chickens out, leaving your mental sanity to hang by a thread.
“It seems you’ve forgotten what I said earlier. They’re mine. Find someone else to have fun with”, and the moment the guests disappear, so does Gojo.
Now that your most sordid desires have been discovered by your lover— and the man still wants you despite everything, for God’s sake—, you’re just waiting for him to act upon his demand. Will you keep pouting like a little girl when he leaves over and over again?
No fucking way. Time to take the matter ibto your own hands.
“Suguru.”
The man whips his head around to look at you. You often call him by his first name, but not with that sultry tone. When you do, it is always for one reason only.
To edge and tease him is your biggest delight, and the tent in his tuxedo pants is already painfully tight around his girth when he replies, “Yes?”
“There’s something we should do.” the sentence tumbles off your lips slowly, every syllable dragging into the other when you finally reach the east wing of the mansion, right beside a huge pool table. Geto is unsure if you realised it, but you’ve been following around Gojo the entire night, and now you’re a few metres away from him.
The orgy grandmaster in the middle of a conversation with a brunette and her rather bulky companion, and your heart stops. The two guests are Shoko Ieiri and Fushiguro Toji.
To say you’re wet would be an understatement.
Goddammit, how many of our friends come to these orgies?
You quickly set aside the question. You’ll deal with everyone else later, for your mind is set on the goal at hand. Also, to think that they’re about to witness what you’re about to do has you squeeze your thighs together as something warm leaks through you.
Geto doesn’t miss a single beat and comes closer to you, his taut chest colliding with yours as his height consumes the air around him. Any sense of shyness or shame is long gone from your body, so you rest your back against the pool table like a languid cat when a sudden gasp leaves your lips.
“We have something to do, you say. What is it, my love?”, Suguru taunts under his breath. His gorgeous fingers are stroking the damp spot at the front of your panties while his thumb flicks patterns around your clothed clit.
“Go on. I want to hear you say it.”  
Good. The almighty Gojo Satoru is not as detached as he prides himself to be.
Without warning, his other hand flies to your hair. The pin that holds it slips off and vanishes in Geto’s pocket, and your strands fall around your face. You stare at him, until he turns to glare at Gojo.
You follow his lead, and you both find the grandmaster with his arms crossed on the chest, laboured breath and foot tapping furiously against the marble floor.
“Fuck me on this pool table while everyone’s watching. Come on, I know it’s to die for.” you say that so nonchalantly that Suguru falters, taken aback, while a low grunt rumbles in Gojo’s throat. He’s close enough to hear you purr such lewd words just fine.
Little do they know, the request is aimed at them both.
The room has fallen silent, Shoko and Toji as amazed as the rest of the guests, but the first to break the ice is the grandmaster himself. He’s regained some self-composure by the time he sidles up to Geto, but you’re one step ahead.
Lost in the haze of lust, they don’t notice you’ve hopped onto the pool table until you press a heel onto Suguru’s crotch, the other on Gojo’s. They both snap back to reality at the feeling, and you giggle when they get harder under the stilettos.
“Shit. You’re soaking wet, love. You’re clenching around the fucking air.”
“You didn’t think I had it in me, did you?” you let go of their groins to spread your legs further on the table. Suguru is the first to grab your thigh, rings digging into the flesh while Gojo’s hand brushes against the other, his approach softer but needy all the same.
Veins pop out of their hands as they both keep you in place, and Satoru glances at you for consent, to make sure you’re fine with him touching you. You nod, then you throw back your head the moment Geto pushes aside your panties with two fingers. He yanks at your roots and you moan as a string of curses at the sight of your puffy cunt echoes between you three.
“B-both.” talking is getting harder by the second, and despite the mask, you can still feel Satoru’s breath fanning on your wet folds. The slit where the mouth is channels the warm air, so you’re really fucked.
“Let me see,” Satoru falls to his knees to take a good look at your pussy, to feel his mouth water with each bead of arousal escaping you, your muscles clamping to have some kind of relief no one can give you but them.
He gulps and whistles to try to ignore how hard he’s got in seconds. “What a sight. So drenched and ready to be filled, uhm? Is this for me, sugar? Or Suguru?”
The mask is definitely not helping.
“What do you want us to do? Use your words.” Suguru coats index and middle finger in your juices and gently prods at your entrance, so ready to pull him in, and they both wait patiently for you to speak.
“Don’t stop. Your fingers-”, your eyes roll back as you lift your hips up to motion for Geto to continue. “I need them in me. Please.”
He obliges with a sigh, because he loves to finger you as much as you adore to sense his fingertips poking your insides.
Your partner buries two fingers in you altogether and you nearly lurch backward at the intrusion, but Satoru is quick to ground your hips on the pool table with his other hand as Suguru starts to massage your inner walls, curling and scissoring his digits apart. 
They both have such nice hands, your mind is spiralling into an endless vortex. But before you can do so, a tap on your thigh brings you to look down.
Satoru is waiting for you.
Power must have gotten to your head, it has to, because your fingers yank down his hood to glide among his pure, soft hair as you breathe out:
“Your mouth, Satoru. Y-your tongue. I want everything.”
Then you remember. No one is allowed to take off their masks, not even the grandmaster.
“I’ve been waiting for so long for this”, Gojo whispers to you, eyes skittering all over your lower abdomen and breasts. Too bad he can’t see your face. “You taste so fucking good.”
A gentle kiss close to your knee shakes you to the core.
Eyes widening in surprise, you ogle shamelessly at Gojo, at his mask slightly tilted up only for his lips to be free of any hindrance. You have no time to react because they immediately latch onto your lower lips, taking half of your pussy in his mouth with a satisfied growl.
Suguru has shifted his attention on your bundle of nerves, focusing on it to let Gojo devour the rest of you.
If it wasn't for the mask, both men would see how much their ministrations are affecting you, but fret not. Your body is showing them plenty to compensate.
Geto laughs and his hand still in your hair descends to your tits. He circles, pinches your nipples through the lace, mimicking the same motion on your clit — you won’t last long, not when he’s hitting all the right spots and his best friend is eating you out the way you like it in front of a bunch of people.
Geto has shared intimate tips on how to pleasure you, and Gojo is following them by the book. Those two had agreed on doing this way before tonight.
How does he know- Oh. Oh.
And you do so with a shared moan from you and them, because you rest your head against Suguru’s chest while your eyes fix on Gojo.
Suddenly all too self-aware of everything, you try to back down from the men, but they both hold you in place. The coil in your stomach tightens even more when Geto’s hoarse voice reaches you.
“Look at us.”
And at that moment, you see Suguru’s inked arm coming between you and the grandmaster, more specifically his hand. It rests on Satoru’s nape and pushes his face into your cunt, almost as if he wants to suffocate him between your legs, but the snow-haired man chuckles at that and tongues your entrance straight away.
The pace set allows him to nose your clit, but when he draws back it's Geto's turn to circle it with his thumb. You can’t escape them.
They’re both right.
“That’s so hot.” you hear someone say, probably Toji.
“It’s too much.” adds Shoko.
“Too fast”, you don’t even know who you’re talking to at this point and you raise yourself on your elbows, back arched on its own. Even the heat emanating from Geto is too much, and you do babble something along the lines of, “N-no, ’s too much. I can’t-”
Satoru stops briefly to kiss your inner thigh, his and Geto’s heart-shaped eyes tunnelling on your heaving chest. Your cleavage is sticky with sweat and Suguru plants his forehead against it as Gojo growls.
“You can.”
And the orgasm comes quicker than expected. The coil cracks, your legs try to snap shut around Satoru’s head but Geto helps him to keep them open as you come with a strangled sob. Breath stuck in your lungs, you feel Suguru come closer to let you moan on his collarbone.
Pleasure clouds your mind as Gojo runs his tongue through your folds to lap up your release and you protest meekly, on the edge of overstimulation.
Gojo wails, keens at your feet when you pull his hair while your inner walls clench around his wet muscle, but he catches on quickly and wets three of his long fingers with your juices as you still fuck yourself on his tongue. Suguru helps you ride through the orgasm, caressing every sliver of your skin he can reach.
“Ssh, that's it, love. Come on his tongue. Look at how needy he is to please you. Give him every droplet of you.” is what cuts through the noise in your ears.
Tears have pooled under your eyes yet you don’t give in to them, rather your hands find harbour in both men’s locks as the last moments of blissful release wash over you.
“Thank you.” you say, voice veiled with a bit of tiredness. Geto strokes you gently around the neck and Satoru pecks you on the leg affectionately before pulling away to allow you and your lover to gawk at him and his fingers, slick with your cum, and he licks them clean with a low whimper.
It’s so painful, the wanton need you have to kiss them both after they gave you a bone-shattering orgasm. But you can’t.
Not here, not now.
Your eyes flash black, pupils dilating beyond normal sense. Suddenly you’re not so spent, anymore. And neither are they.
Suguru doesn’t need to be told twice. You’re still a tiny bit out of it, but suddenly you’re in Geto’s arms, and he’s walking so fast amongst the little crowd that had gathered around you that you almost miss Shoko and Toji. With whatever strength you have left, you simply yell:
Satoru grabs his best friend by the tuxedo’s collar and he grunts, out of breath: “My room. Now.”
Toji’s deep chuckles rattle against your bones, and you hear faintly the grandmaster encouraging his guests to enjoy themselves while he’s gone, because he needs to “step back for a while”.
“Guys, we need to talk. My place, tomorrow morning. Bring the mimosa!”
Since he’s spent uncountable days there, it doesn’t take long for Suguru to get to his best friend’s suite. You’ve completely recovered by now, still you wait until your partner has laid you down on the queen-sized bed before acting.
“Hey, slow down. I’m not going anywhere.”
Once within arm’s reach, Suguru lets out a snort when your arms circle his waist and you push him on the bed. Now he’s on his back while you straddle him, and your eyes land on his groin. He’s so stiff with need that the moment you unzip his pants, his cock slaps against his stomach.
“Easy, my love.” Geto laughs amidst pants, for your hands are everywhere on him. You practically tear his shirt apart to feel the familiar scent of him fill your nostrils, but when you pull aside your panties to sink on his girth, your lover places his hands on your hips, stopping you.
You pout, defeated. “I just want you inside me. Don’t you want to be inside me, Suguru?” in saying so you pout in faux defeat, all while stroking his cock.
The man grabs your waist. Hard.
“Just wait a minut-”
Of course he wants— hell, he needs to fuck you into the ground until you cream around his dick. You always look so pretty when you do, all loose limbs, glassy eyes and bitten lips.
But he promised a certain person to wait for him.
“No. I’m done waiting.” you shake your head, his pleas falling on deaf ears. You’re about to pull his hands away from you and have your way. Well, just before the lock clicks.
Having your back turned, you don’t see who’s locked the door until Satoru’s abs graze your shoulders. And his erection is pressed against your back, causing you to short-circuit.
When did he have time to undress? Why is he so huge?
But these are the last things you need to worry about, because as soon as his lips are on your neck, you realise his mask isn’t where it’s supposed to be.
His angelic features, twisted in desire, are a sight to see.
And yours fall on the bed once Gojo takes it off of you. The dim lights in the bedroom are easy on the eyes, and much easier is to be eye-fucked but not one, but two men.
“So am I, baby. So am I. '' Satoru peels off your panties without hesitation and once they’re past your hip bones, he gives them a pull and ball them up in his fist. Geto watches his best friend pump himself with your panties acting as a fleshlight, grunting and moaning.
I’m such a lucky girl, your mind is going in circles as you get rid of Geto’s mask. I have them both all for myself.
Now that you’re all face to face, you cave in. First, you drag Suguru in a kiss, violent and brimming with passion he reciprocates just as strongly as Gojo, with his face perched on your shoulder, awaits for him.
“Sa- ngh, I can’t. ‘T-‘toru.” 
“Now you can ride me, love.” Geto assists you as you sink on his cock. Inch by inch, you impale yourself on his girth until you bottom out, all while Satoru keeps your lips prisoners of his. His moans are yours and yours his, even when you break away to inhale some fresh air.
The name has Gojo’s blood go straight to his lower abdomen and once Geto lets you go with a final bite on your lower lip, the snow-haired man hauls you flush against him, and you’re welcomed with an open-mouthed kiss. You sigh in it and unconsciously peck at his lips, making him growl.
He’s about to explode, amd Suguru with him.
The moment doesn’t last long because the angry tip of Gojo’s cock, smeared in spit and your arousal that still coated the panties, is breaching past your folds to sit inside your full pussy.
You’ve broken every rule set by the orgy grandmaster, and he and his best friend lured you to participate to an orgy culminating in a dissolute threesome.
“Be a good girl and take me. We know you can, right, Suguru?” Satoru abruptly lurches towards Geto to give him a quick kiss to which your partner responds by cradling his face with a hand. The moment is so intimate, so special that your heart flutters.
You look at them tenderly for what it feels for an eternity, but they don’t let you feel left out for long, because their lips, their teeth mark your skin as Satoru eases himself in you, chomping down on your neck to restrain himself from coming already. You nearly do the same.
Feeling so full, stretched in any way possible now that his shaft rests upon Geto’s is truly divine.
It is worth the risk, since you grind on Suguru’s abs and raise your arms to lock them around Gojo’s neck to whisper,
“Give me more. More, more, more... ”
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© nyimasu — do not copy, translate, repost and modify my works.
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rlqfpdl · 2 months
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All I want is you
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Apollo!Fem!reader x Jason Grace
Summary: You can’t help but admire Jason. Not knowing he’s doing the same.
Contains: fluff. Characters might seem a bit ooc.
A/N: I noticed the lack of Jason fics so hope you all enjoy this one. I had such fun writing it. Feedback is always welcomed and reqs are open <3
Word count: 1.1k
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His skin seemed to glow perfectly, his eyes sparkled with the sun. His perfect silky blonde hair was a bit messy, like he had just woken up. Gods, it was flawless, like gold. His slightly tilted glasses made him look cuter than when he didn't have them on. If you didn't know any better, you would say you're enamored, captivated, charmed, enchan…
“Stop staring, you're drooling,” Will said, pointing towards the corner of his lip and casually continuing to eat his breakfast. You brought your finger towards your lip to confirm. How embarrassing, you thought. “I wasn't staring. I don't know what I could ever be staring at,'' you defended, avoiding Will's gaze. Suddenly, your plate was really interesting as you fiddled around with some pancakes. Smooth, gaslight your brother into thinking he's the crazy one. 
“Sure lover girl, let's pretend you weren't ogling at Mr. Sparky over there,” Will just knew how to push your buttons. Both of you being top healers meant you knew each other better than the rest of your siblings. Sadly, that also meant he knew your weaknesses all too well like a certain blonde he kept talking about.
 “He's way out of my league” you rebutted. You didn't give yourself enough credit. Most would assume you were a daughter of Aphrodite if it weren't for the distinct freckles and soft glow that every Apollo kid seems to have. 
“Yeah well, he likes you back. you guys just need to be a little less shy” he stated as if it were a fact. But it wasn't, well, at least not for you. Jason was just too handsome. Sure, the Aphrodite boys were too, and so were some of the Hermes boys, but Jason was just different in your eyes. It wasn't only about looks; it was his caring personality and how nice he could be. Not that it was a surprise, but considering he is the son of Jupiter you would have thought he would be a little more conceited. 
”You know, you keep saying that, but I don't see it. Plus I can't think of crushes right now; we have to prepare the infirmary.” both you and Will know that deep down, you wanted to believe that Jason liked you back but were always ‘too busy’ to talk about your feelings. 
Especially on capture the flag days, You weren't one to participate; fighting isn't your thing. You were half decent with a bow but just awful at playing, landing you with the amazing job of nursing everyone back to health. You would think people knew better than to slash each other to almost death, knowing that their desert privilege was on the line. But that never seemed to stop anyone from creating more work for the Apollo cabin. 
You sighed as you prepared some of the beds in the infirmary, having gauzes and ambrosia ready at your disposal. Singing softly as you worked, maybe you weren't blessed with amazing archery skills or astonishing arts abilities, but you had other skills in your favor. Like your voice and talent with the lyre. Most of the camp would agree that you were the best singer from the Apollo cabin, often leading the sing-alongs at the campfires or just singing sweet children's songs to the little ones at camp. 
Caught up in your singing and folding of sheets, you didn't hear the conch being blown or the screaming campers celebrating their victory or announcing their complaints over losing. So, to say you almost had a heart attack when you heard a soft voice call your name was truly an understatement. 
“Gods Austin you scared me,” you said, looking at your brother as he smiled softly, “Sorry you just have a patient ready for you, doc,” he said, smirking slightly as he was up to something. “I'll attend some; tell Will to take care of the rest” You turned around, not looking at your now creepily smiling brother. You started putting a little tray on one of the beds . Austin continued talking, “Oh but there is this camper who has specially requested for you,” he said as he dragged said camper towards you. “Okay well bring them up; i don't have time to attend everybody,” your voice started to faint as you looked up towards this oh so special camper that requested you. 
“I can come back at another time if you're too busy,” he said sheepishly, scratching the back of his head with rosy cheeks, he was embarrassed. But now you sported matching red cheeks as you looked at him intensely in awe of his presence. “No, you fine Jason please sit” you gestured towards the bed. “I got nicked with a sword; it's not that bad” he explained, tilting his head, his voice was ringing in your ears like a charm.
“Can i touch your face” you mumbled as you began to study the small gash he had from afar. “Sure,” Jason stuttered a bit, his face getting a little bit redder. You softly touched his jaw, further inspecting his injury. “Well, it's not deep enough for ambrosia or nectar, but it's still kind of deep,” you stated grabbing a cotton ball with a pair of tweezers “I’m just going to clean it up and heal it ,” you said, your voice shaking a bit. Jason could only muster a hum as you placed a tiny amount of alcohol into his wound. He winced at the sting, but it didn't seem to bother him that much, especially with how gently you touched his face. 
Both of you fell into an uncomfortable silence, not knowing what to say, faces a bit too close to each other, entering in panic mode. Yet Jason built up enough courage as he whispered a faint “Your voice is so beautiful.” You couldn't help but look into his blue eyes, eternally getting lost in those precious sky-blue irises. Your faces got closer slowly, instinctively, as if it was the only way to respond. Trying to wrap your head around the boy's words truly left you speechless. But life decided to ruin this perfect moment as you heard someone speak. 
“I need some help with some Ares kids,” Will said standing there, clearly seeing he had interrupted something. “Right,” you responded brushing off nonexistent dust from your camp shirt and looking back at Jason. “Your wound should feel better now, let me know if it doesn't,” you said, all giddy at the thought of him coming back. He just nodded shyly, trying to say anything as you walked closer to Will but ultimately stayed silent. 
“Your voice is so beautiful, marry me Y/N” mocked Will as both of you walked towards the other side of the infirmary, punching his stomach, “Shut up” you whispered. Gods, Jason Grace might just be the death of you. 
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chaoticklesblog · 3 months
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Maybe You Just Need More Convincing
Adam gets his everloving shit wrecked from some of the Hotel Staff in order to convince him sinners really can be redeemed. Charlie also recruits Lucifer to give them a hand, in more ways than one.
Warnings for foul language, some violence, suggestive humor (nothing extreme, just some totally in chatacter comments), my shitty grammar/punctuation, and lots of fluff/tickles. I hope you enjoy!! :3
It was no secret that Adam was heaven (and hell's) resident douchebag. He was stuck up, conceited, and completely self-centered. He had no real intentions of giving Hazbin Hotel a shot. He hadn't even shown up in person to the meeting in which was arranged originally between himself and Lucifer. And after Lucifer's daughter had stood in Lucifer's place at that meeting, well, Adam just couldn't take anything the princess of hell had to say seriously.
Charlie Morningstar was less than pleased to discover that the angels were going to be on a new six month extermination schedule. How was that even fair? It was so frustrating that Adam had flat out refused to listen to reason or even take Charlie's pitch of redemption even halfway seriously. He spent most of their allotted meeting time making sexist comments, talking about himself, interrupting anything Charlie had to say, and eating his pile of ribs in the most obnoxious and rude way possible.
Charlie had to think of a way to truly convince the head angel to call off the extermination and redeem those who were taking their path to redemption through the hotel seriously. But no song, no dramatic speech, no amount of begging or pleading could convince the dickhead that her Hotel would ever actually work.
"How could we actually convince heavens top angel to take our Hotel seriously?" Charlie had asked the staff and two meager residents in a meeting that was originally to be comprised of forgiveness role-playing and trust exercises. The change of routine was much welcomed by all, though they'd never explicitly tell Charlie that.
"We could just kill him?" Alastor suggested, his grin broadening and eyes darkening at the thought.
"That wouldn't be a good way to exemplify our goals or show redemption," Charlie paused. "We just need to figure out a weakness, you know, find something that we could use against him! Does anyone have any... less violent ideas?" She shoots Alastor a sympathetic smile.
"Vicious blackmail?" Angel suggests casually. He has the day off, and while he'd rather be scoring drugs or drinking at the bar with Husk's sole company, this discussion is far better than trust exercises.
"That's a less violent alternative," Charlie comments, "But still shady..."
"Listen toots, we aren't gonna convince Adam or anyone else to take us seriously if we don't play at least a little bit dirty," Angel tucks his upper set of arms behind his neck in a bored gesture.
"Angel has a point, Charlie. They wouldn't listen to reason, and the angels are notorious for not playing fair. I know you're trying to find a way that isn't violent or unconventional, but we might not have much of a choice. Especially if we want to defend our people," Vaggie steps closer to Charlie to embrace her briefly.
"Blackmail... nonviolent... unconventional... playing dirty..." Charlie thinks briefly about the options that fall under all these categories, and suddenly her face breaks out into a wide and evil grin. "I know exactly what we have to do! And I know just the person to call to ensure this plan will work. But I'm 99.9% positive, and it'll be foolproof!"
••••
"You want to what?" Lucifer's voice raises an octave. Unsure of what exactly this favor was his nearly estranged daughter had asked of him, he couldn't tell her no. But he hadn't known this was the specific favor in question until he arrived to the hotel. And Charlie had intentionally left out a few key details.
Had Lucifer known his precious daughter and hotel patronage had planned to exploit his ticklishness, he would've very well declined and spent the afternoon with his vast collection of rubber ducks.
"But that's only part of the favor. We also need you to arrange a meeting with Adam face to face. But first we need to know if this plan will work," Charlie's voice at the end was near pleading. Lucifer almost felt sorry for her, but what did this have to do with tickling him?
"I can arrange him to meet you all in person," Lucifer spoke slowly' "but what the hell does this have to do with tickling me?" His voice rose to a strangled octave, indicating that he was indeed ticklish.
"Mr. Morningstar, erm, your majesty, Charlie pointed out that you and Adam have similar angelic traits... so we figured that if you were... also inflicted the same weakness... We might actually have a shot at bringing that Adam prick down a few pegs," Vaggie nervously stepped forward to shake her girlfriends father's hand.
"I'd like to peg him," Angel murmered, earning a few looks of utter horror he quickly added "Adam, I meant Adam! Besides haven't you heard of hate fucking?" Angel grumbled defensively.
Lucifer turned back to Charlie.
"So you're asking me... if you can find various sensitive spots on my body... to use on Adam... in hopes of getting him to call of the next extermination?"
Charlie nodded enthusiastically and damnnit, Lucifer just couldn't say no to her.
"Okay, okay, okay... But a few things first... I'm only letting you do this as part of that favor. If anyone here ever tries to tickle me outside this one stand alone instance, consider yourselves to be absolutely wrecked. As ticklish as I am, I will ensure to pay you back in kind tenfold if any of you pull a stunt like this outside this small window of time. I'm only doing this because it would be nice to knock that dickhead down a few pegs."
His threat clung to the air a few moments. The king of hell was known to be ruthless, and he was a force to be reckoned with.
"Thanks dad!" Charlie reached over to hug him. Something the two hadn't done in such a long time but their embrace felt familiar. Normal even.
"A couple of other points..." Lucifer told the group, "an angels wings are the most sensitive, pretty much everywhere. Between the feathers, shoulder blades, wing pits, I mean, it's lethal... Lilith used to..."
Lucifer couldn't help but turn a blushy pink color at the mention of his former wife. He hadn't been properly tickled since... well, it had been quite some time. Lilith wasn't a stranger to tickling Lucifer to tears, but she was the only one to ever indulge in his weakness. He was never tickled by anyone other than Lilith. And cetainly not by this many people. Charlie had grown up with witnessing Lillith tickle him to pieces. Faint memories of her father squealing, shrieking, and downright begging Lilith not to tickle him while laughing helplessly. But Lilith had always been able to easily overpower her much smaller husband. But Charlie also knew how Lucifer could hold his own. She knew what a fierce tickle monster he could be in her own experiences and knew by watching her parents in her much younger days that Lucifer almost always sought revenge.
Lucifer kept reminding himself that this was necessary. He knew this was to help his people of hell, his daughter even, but being demon royalty and exposing his most innate physical weakness and allowing others to take advantage of it was downright terrifying. It had been bad then, but now? Lucifer let out an involuntary shudder.
"For Adam, specifically, I'm led to believe that he would have another weak point aside from his wings. But if his wings are anything like mine, then you shouldn't have much trouble!"
Lucifer tried his hardest to ignore the shit eating grins forming on the faces of both Angel Dust and Alastor. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. But he remembered his favor to Charlie, and all the memories of his past tickling experiences and thought that maybe it wouldn't be so bad.
"Please, do tell us of any other weak spots you think the angel will have, your royal higness!" Alastor chimes in, eager to have something to use against both Adam and Lucifer.
"God removed one of Adam's ribs to create his new wife. And being touched by that amount of power would absolutely cause that spot to be more sensitive... It's basically a given."
"So torture the guys wings and ribs, got it," Angel smirked.
"Torture Adam's wings and ribs," Lucifer clarified "you motherfuckers better go easy with me." Lucifer couldn't help but back away nervously from the group. Unfortunately for him, there was only so far he could back up before his back collided with the wall of the Hotel lobby adjacent to where Husk was sleeping at the bar. At least Nifffty and Husk weren't involved in this scheme.
"Anything else we need to know before we tickle you to death?" Charlie asked almost sympathetically as Vaggie, Angel, and Alastor closed in on the king of hell.
"Sixty seconds. Do NOT exceed sixty seconds." Four against one was definitely not a fair match.
Lucifer wasn't given time to think while the group circled around him. Shit. Fuck. Shit.
"Sixty seconds," Charlie clarified, "starting in 3..."
Why the fuck did he agree to this again?
"2..."
This really had better work on Adam. Otherwise Lucifer knew he'd be totally fucked around Alastor, Angel and Vaggie, who all seemed to take pure delight in discovering the king of hell was ridiculously ticklish. Why did Charlie have to tell them?
"1..."
Shit. And he was lost in helpless, screech filled laughter. Lucifer had curled into a ball as ten arms and countless tickling fingers dug into almost all his ticklish spots.
"WHAHAHAHAHHAHT THE FUHUHUHCK AHHAH STAHAP!" Lucifer pleaded, knowing it hadn't even been 10 seconds yet.
Alastor had taken the liberty in casting a temporary paralysis spell on Lucifer so he couldn't even protect his worst spots. He had taken this opportunity to also tickle the smaller demon's shoulder blades which shook helplessly as his six magnificent wings unfurled.
Angel and Vaggie started to explore his wings and Lucifer had severely underestimated just how much it would tickle.
"OohoHAHAhaA, IHIHIHT tiHIHihihCkles HAhahHa soHo mUhUHUHUCH AHAhaHa!" Lucifer squealed as Angel and Vaggie had tickled the soft skin beneath his feathers, Angel's extra set of hands had made quick work of his wing pits which caused his laughter to shoot up an octave.
"That's kind of the point, short king," Alastor teased as he had switched to taser his sides while Charlie had been scribbling at his ribs, grinning madly as her plan had seemed now that it could be executed without fail.
Lucifer was in absolute tickle hell. Literally. The sensation of Vaggie and Angel mercilessly tickling his wings, scritching the skin beneath his feathers, digging into the sensitive wing pits and occasionally poking and scratching at his shoulder blades combined with Alastor squeezing his sides and Charlie torturing his ribs had nearly caused Lucifer to break. He couldn't move to protect his tickle spots. And all he could do was laugh and shriek and hope the ticklish assault would end whenever the alloted minute was up.
"I didn't think you'd still be this ticklish!" Charlie cooed.
"OkAYHAHAHhahAH! SEhehee? IHAH- I TOHOAHAHHOLD YOUHOO AHAHhahah it WOHOULD WORK!" Lucifer cackled.
He never had four people tickle him at once before. It was the most ticklish he'd ever felt in his entire life. It wasn't fair to have all his tickle spots exploited at once!
Finally, after what felt like an eternity of cackling, the minute had passed and as promised, Charlie called off the experimental tickle attack. Alastor reversed the spell and Lucifer had crumpled to a giggling panting mess on the floor, overstimulated from all the tickles and trying to rub away the residual ghost tickles.
"So was that 60 seconds of getting your everloving shit rocked, short king?" Angel grins down at Lucifer.
"Seriously, fuck you guys," Lucifer giggles.
"Think this will actually work on Adam?" Vaggie turns to Charlie beaming as she helps her one day father-in-law off the floor.
"It has to!" Charlie says with pure confidence.
"Thanks, dad, for helping us prove our theory to be true. Adam won't stand a chance against us." Charlie hugs the still giggling Lucifer around the middle.
"I don't mind seeing that loser taken down, I'm... glad I could help, but seriously, that was awful," Lucifer says, hugging Charlie back.
"I'll arrange for Adam to arrive here tomorrow and then you can convince him to listen."
●●●●
Adam was irritated. Sure, the king of hell was able to order him to meet in person to discuss business matters, but that didn't mean he wanted to. If it were up to him, he would meet through holographic magic, but Lucifer had strictly forbidden it for this meeting only.
So here he was, at the hotel's doorstep, expecting to meet with Lucifer and returning to report back to heaven as soon as this mandated meeting was concluded.
What Adam wasn't expecting, however, was to be met with Alastor, opening the door positively beaming at him.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Why, you must be Adam, we've all been dying to meet you! Well, if it weren't for the fact that we are already dead!" Alastor chuckles at his own joke. "Do come in!"
"Who in the fuck are you?" Adam glares at Alastor, wary of the taller demon.
"Why, I'm Alastor, the infamous radio demon of hell and manager of this fine establishment! Allow me to show you around hell's only rehabilitation center for lost souls!" Alastor grabs Adam's wrist and drags him through the hotel lobby toward the bar.
"Allow Husker to pour you a drink, on the house!" Alastor grins at Adam's sheer befuddlement. He was out of his element here in unfamiliar territory. Husk pours an unmarked liquid into a glass and slides it toward Adam.
"...uh, thanks... but when am I supposed to meet with Lucifer?" Adam looks at the drink as if it were poisonous.
"Don't be a silly! We would never think to poison the one and only angel who had the power to permanently end the exterminations of hell's residents!" Alastor laughs as if he could read Adam's mind.
"And Lucifer will be here soon, but we have other eager candidates to speak with you before hand!" Alastor continues smirking as Adam slowly begins to drink from the glass.
That's when Adam turns and notices Vaggie, Charlie, and Angel behind him, a bit too close for comfort. And suddenly, Adam finds himself unable to move, thanks to Alastor's demonic power and curse of immobility.
"What the actual FUCK, Charlie?" Adam tries to writhe away but is unable to do so.
"Adam, thank you for joining us today! We thought it might take a team approach to convince you that our redemption center deserves a chance to save sinners from extermination," Charlie smiles.
"I already fuckin told you that hell is eternal damnation, I'm not changing my mind and I think that your hotel is a worthless waste of time!" Adam spits angrily.
"Maybe you just need more convincing..." Angel smiles, excited to be able to have one over on this pompous angel prick.
"I said Noho!" Adam let's out a startled Huff as Charlie prods his side near the bottom of his ribs.
"I don't think you're in a position to refuse our quite reasonable requests." Alastor chuckles.
"What are you all playing at?" Adam sneers, albeit nervously.
"Well, we can't harm you, obviously, but we found a rather unconventional method of torture to utilize to convince you to take us seriously," Charlie explains.
Torture? Adam now realized three things.
One: he was outnumbered.
Two: he was completely immobile and couldn't move from whatever power was keeping him trapped.
Three: The poke Charlie had administered to his side had been... well... ticklish... Adam had started to realize that they intended to tickle him. They couldn't. They wouldn't, actually, could they?
"No, no, Charlie. I demand you to release me!"
"Maybe this will help convince you not be such a pompous asshole," Charlie smirked down at Adam evilly.
And suddenly, Adam felt her dig all ten fingers into one of his most ticklish spots, his ribs. And he felt Angel and Alastor tickle into his sensitive shoulder blades, causing his wings to expand.
"Nohohoho, what thehahahhah FUHAHAHAHAHUCK?" Adam squeals.
Vaggie had hopped in to help Charlie tickle his stomach and hips and Adam was in absolute ticklish hell.
"Fuhahahahuck YOHOU GUYS, AHAHAHAHAHA!" Adam can't even squirm away from their torturous fingers. His laughter shoots up an octave as Alastor and Angel tickle into his wings.
No tickle spot was spared on the guy and he couldn't even move or writhe away from the ticklish touches. It wasn't fair!
"Think you'll give the hotel another shot?" Charlie asked, digging sharply into Adam's lower rib cage. Adam's laughter doubled.
"NohohahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Oh shit, Adam! It feels Ike one of your ribs are missing!! Maybe we should count them to see how many are there!" Charlie teases, enjoying how much power they have over Adam.
"FUHUHUCK OHOHOHOHOOFF!" Adam screeches as Charlie proceeds to count and recounts his ribs.
"We've got all day, tough guy!" Angel digs roughly into Adam's wing pits as Alastor digs his claws beneath the feathers to torture the delicate skin beneath. How long had it been? Fifteen minutes? Twenty? Adam quickly realizes that he is utterly fucked.
Adam's laughter goes silent. It's not fair to have them all tickle him to pieces. He couldn't even fight back or try to get away. All he could do was lie there and take it. His eyes begin to water as they continue their ticklish onslaught. And Adam just can't handle much more.
"Think we can renegotiate now?" Charlie asks and Adam quickly nods despite his silent hysteria.
"Okay, I think he's had enough," Charlie slows her hands and pulls them away, and the rest of the group follows suit.
Adam lays there panting giggling, still feeling the ticklish assault through his nervous system.
"I hope you won't forget this, as we are easily able to convince you to do exactly as we want," Alastor chuckles darkly, removing the immobility curse.
"Seriously, fuck you guys," Adam flips them off as he uses his magic to dissappear. His tough guy facade had been broken.
Adam would call off the next extermination, out of fear of what would happen to him if he continued to refuse. Now, his greatest enemies knew of his ticklish weakness. He would never be able to live it down. And maybe a part of him didn't want to.
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teyamsatan · 10 months
Text
ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕍𝕀𝕀𝕀: 𝕊𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕪 𝔽𝕠𝕣 ℕ𝕠𝕥 𝕄𝕒𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝕄𝕪 ℂ𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕖𝕗𝕠𝕝𝕕
pairing: Neteyam x (f)Omaticaya!reader
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synopsis: In the wake of your separation, your mind is made as to the future of your rocky relationship with your once best friend, now best enemy, Neteyam.
warnings: 18+ minors DNI, aged-up! Neteyam/Reader, enemies-to-lovers, angst (mentions of violence, battle, blood, death, confrontation, admission of feelings), strong language.
wc: 6.7k words
a/n: besties, it brings me sorrow to say that monster in me has come to an end, and i can only hope you enjoy and have enjoyed this story, that turned from a silly little fic about two people who hate/crave each other into so much more than i ever envisioned. i really struggled writing this chapter, and i hope i don't disappoint with the ending, and i hope you like it. what i can say, is that this is not the end for Neteyam and Vi, as I have at least one more oneshot in mind to showcase their ... progress (hehe). having smut in this chapter didn't feel right to me, but it doesn't mean it's not coming ;) pun intended.
as always, thank you so much for reading and engaging with my stories and with me, it means more than I could ever express into words. I love you besties, and i hope you stick around for a long time, because i will x
na'vi compendium: txepvi  - spark, oare - moon, nawm - great, tsakarem - tsa'hik in training, atokirina - seed of the tree of souls, sa'nok - mother, senpu - affectionate term for dad
lightly proof read, if you see something wrong, no you don't
: ̗̀➛ previous chapter (x) : ̗̀➛ series masterlist (x) : ̗̀➛ series playlist (x)
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Break my soul in two looking for you But you're right here
“Are you sure, ma ‘ite? You know we wouldn’t force you into anything, but… please think it through. Eywa’s vision was clear, and it showed you two together. Eywa is never wrong, you know this.”
You thought about it, barely able to look into Mo’at's beautiful, sagacious eyes that always felt like they could see through you, through deception and conceit, and get to the soul of problem, the inner core of your amalgamation of conflicting, earth-shattering emotions, covered by a crust of barely-there composure, ready to erupt with any slight friction of the tectonic plates of your heart. You thought about last night, about his words, that still rang in your ears in a muffled cacophony of sounds you were trying your hardest to drown out, that you were scared would end up drowning you, instead. 
“I loved you, Vi.I fucking loved you. You were everything to me. And you broke me.” 
“Even the smallest similarity killed me, reminded me how much I hate you, how much I want to, how much I don't. I've wanted to hate you so much, I tried so hard, but you were in every dream, in every fantasy, you haunted me my whole life."
You thought about his actions, about what drove them, about how, at the end of the day, they were the same driving forces that you acted on. Hurt. Betrayal. Jealousy. Fear. You thought about your actions. How poison crept beneath your skin and pooled in your heart and pumped it through your whole bloodstream, until it was all there was, until it blinded you, and how he started this, but you continued it. 
How his fault was indifference, and yours was madness that only he had the power to force out of you. You thought about his parents, and how his dad was now your dad, and how hard you fought for hearing the magic words: “we couldn’t have done it without you, kid”. Those words, and the “you’re welcome” that followed, became as necessary to you as the air you breathe. It may have started, this need to gain Jake’s approval, as a way to get a rise out of Neteyam, your best attempt at getting him to lash out at you, scream and yell, anything but the horrible silence he ordained you with, but in time, it had less to do with the boy and more to do with you, with how his dad reminded you of your own, how the words of praise and admiration made the ones you were used to, that you’d never hear again, echo through the your tent and through the forest, hidden in between the whistles and sonorous trills of birds, but never forgotten, not to you. 
You thought about his specious assumptions, and your words, and how, despite what you spat at him last night, they weren’t the whole truth. You did tell Jake that you didn’t want to mate with him, but not out of a lack of love or desire. No, the thought of one day being one with the boy who shone light through the broken cracks of your soul every day after your parents died, the boy who himself shone brighter than any star or sun or galaxy out there in the vast unknown, the boy who challenged you, and annoyed you, and loved you, and got you… it made you happy. It made butterflies flutter in your stomach and tingle, it made a fuzzy feeling gather in your brain and haze your mind until it was full of nothing but misty reveries, of a life beyond your wildest dreams and fantasies, of night flights and battles won together, of family found and family kept. 
You told Jake what you did because your dreams couldn’t happen while you were pushed to the side and made to undertake the duties of a Tsakarem, they couldn’t happen if you had to forsake your talents and an integral part of yourself. You thought that, by saying no, you could make your dad proud, you could make Jake proud… make him proud. You thought that by becoming the warrior you knew you could one day be, you could help him… take away some of the burden that you knew he was shouldering all by himself, that of the eldest son, the responsible child, the prodigy of the clan. More than anything, you wanted to be worthy of him and of his love. That’s why you said no. 
If I can't relate to you anymore Then who am I related to?
But now, it was all wrong. Your love, your hate, your history and your future, everything you’ve done, everything you should have done. It was all wrong. O’i’en was right, you realised. You held onto this broken relationship, this hopeless promise of a mateship, not because you wanted revenge, but because you wanted him… in any way you could get him. Your undefeated stubbornness, and the war that left too many collateral victims for you to ever be able to sleep at night again, led to scars in your soul no one could ever fix, that you’d have to mend yourself in time, that you never could while in an arrangement you should have declined to begin with. It was finally time… 
“I’m sure, ma Tsa’hik.”
…time to say goodbye to the child you knew - the one you were, the one he was, and the love that took too much of both of you, the one that turned to ashes in your mouth. 
And if this is the long haul How'd we get here so soon?
Neteyam’s confusion was normal for the dazed, quiet astir he found himself in after just waking up. What wasn’t normal, however, is how the confusion didn’t evaporate once the blurry haze disappeared, but only deepened with the sight, or lack thereof, awaiting him in the green, luscious clearing he felt like he was reclaiming, like it could slowly be his… both of yours again. He didn’t feel this way now, in this place that all of a sudden felt barren and cold, like an endless tundra, like his soul felt. You were gone. 
In a way, it was to be expected. In some way, Neteyam knew last night was a just a fluke, a heady combination of overflowing of intense emotions that were too intense to be contained, that had to be released in the only way you both knew how, in the only way that would push the hurt aside and leave only a mess of denial and pleasure in its wake, because an orgasm is always easier to deal with than the pain that came with the cathartic act of confession, of owning up to your mistakes, of talking through years of hurt pent up in your already broken soul. You both did what you did best, so Neteyam shouldn’t be surprised. And yet he was. 
He wasn’t only surprised, he realises. No, he would be happy if that was all he was. Neteyam was angry. Angry and seething, as he was, he picked himself up from the floor, the smell of you still imbedded in his nostrils, your cum still on him as he took in his naked form, before tightening his loincloth over his hips, a task easier said than done with the furious slashing of his tail whose movements he couldn’t control, no matter how hard he tried. He didn’t know why such intense, overpowering anger was washing over him in tidal waves that were crushing his spirit under their monstrous weight, removing any reason from his mind, any sane reasoning or critical thinking. Why would he expect you to stay? You didn’t owe him anything, and this changed nothing. Nothing’s different. Neither of you admitted to anything, neither were able to admit to the fault either of you had in the unraveling of your relationship, in the actions that lead to death and hurt, to pain and loss. So why did it matter?
"The first step in solving any problem is recognising there is one, brother. The sooner you admit your feelings, the sooner you can work towards fixing your broken relationship."
Did I close my fist around something delicate? Did I shatter you?
With a sigh, Neteyam made his way back to the village, hoping that once he saw you, all the answers would come rushing back to him, would make it perfectly clear as to the path he was supposed to take, the words that he was supposed to utter, which puerile confessions were better said and which better left gathering dust in the back of the rooms of his heart. When he saw you, he'd finally know...
The day was in full swing in the clan, as people were making the final preparations for the funeral processions that would take place once eclipse settled in. Neteyam winced at the mourning families, at the bodies laid on the floor, covered in leaves and flowers, in the way they'd remain, until their flesh would return to Eywa, return to the nature from which they were born, allowing for growth that would keep the community going. One life ends, another begins. That saying was as much part of him as any organ, any physical aspect of him was. That saying was the dogma of the Omaticaya, of the Na'vi as a whole. He knew it by heart, its meaning coursed through his veins, and yet, it didn't lessen the blow. It didn't stop the hurt and the pain of having to watch it, having to know to some extent, he was at fault for it.
He expected to see you by now, lending a hand, despite the fact you should be taking it easy - you were never one for rule following, and although you got better in time, especially after your blooming relationship with O’i’en, who, despite it killing Neteyam to admit, was a positive influence in your life, some things about you would never change. The need to help, to be of use, to prove your worth, the need to feel like you’re making an effort, the need to hide your pain deep inside yourself, no matter how hard life was grinding you down, it was intrinsic to you in a way you would never be able to shake. And so Neteyam was sure he'd see you here. But he didn't. Instead, he saw his mother, spotting him from across the patch of forest they called home, eyeing him intently, with a blend of emotions Neteyam couldn't quite place. There was a heaviness to her, which he couldn't say he felt surprised about, but the twinge of fear and pity in her eyes, clearly directed at her eldest son, was something he didn't expect to see, and it scared him. Without any thought, he tracked towards his family's tent, unable to break his gaze from her, whose own fell to the floor, before turning away and entering the home, the flaps swinging closed behind her, the sudden chasm between them putting a knot in Neteyam's throat. Something was wrong. What else could be wrong?
And I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island Wondering, "Where did my baby go?"
"Sa'nok, nawm sa'nok, Oel Ngati Kameie."
His grandmother's permanent serious expression was somehow even more pronounced now, and Neteyam noticed the signs of weariness and exhaustion clear on her beautiful face. Still, with her most arduous attempt at a smile, she brought her curled fingers to her forehead and extended them in her grandson's direction, before giving her daughter a pointed look.
"What's going on?"
"Ma 'itan..."
The knot in his throat descended until it hit his stomach with a heavy splash, the feeling of dread nearly knocking him over.
"Mother, just tell me. Just please... tell me."
"She... she broke the engagement, Neteyam. What happened between you?"
The fast times, the bright lights, the merry-go Sorry for not making you my centrefold
The river that the Omaticaya used as a source of water, and nourishment, and entertainment, and hygiene, the one that was normally bustling with life and energy, was barren and deserted as you settled on its bank, leg mindlessly swinging back and forth in the cold, clear water. You focused on the way it felt, the flawless flow, as it touched your skin and how every once in a while, fish would nibble at your feet, and you were almost relieved that at least some creatures still looked at you like you were still alive. You didn’t feel like it, not anymore.
You didn’t feel like a Na’vi, like a person, more like a mix of pure grief and guilt that managed to swallow you whole, leaving just a cloud of misery in its wake. You knew you shouldn’t be here. There were better, more important things for you to do. Help was needed in the village, you needed to prepare for the ceremony, you needed to claim your ikran, wash her, cover her in the leafy shroud she would spend the rest of time in. You had to say goodbye. You owed her a proper funeral. You owed her a goodbye. And yet, your body was paralysed on the edge of this river, staring into nothingness, trying to find a way to make your mind, which was simultaneously empty and full of thoughts, each one more horrifying then the next, work and move your muscles, do the thing it always does where adrenaline takes over and makes you focus, makes you try, makes you brave. There was nothing now, not anymore.
Your ears twitched as the shrubbery rustled with movement behind you, and your scrunched nose relaxed as it picked up Jake's scent. Your coiled, immobile tail found its place nestled next to your thighs, and when you turned your head, you noticed your surrogate father, the mighty Olo'eyktan, dressed in ceremonial garbs, the red, feathery vest contrasting nicely against his dark, azure skin. You couldn’t look in his inquisitive, shocked eyes, that knew you to your core, the eyes that always looked at you with love and care, with pride and encouragement, that now you assumed would be filled with sorrow and disappointment, so you settled on looking at his headpiece, the imposing, oval stone a much more manageable sight right now.
"Kid..."
His feet picked up pace, the same way your heart did in your chest, and you let out a shocked, pained gasp as he kneeled by your side and took your body into his, his hand finding the back of your head and you melted in his embrace, listening to his erratic heartbeat that mirrored yours, that you focused on like a hymn, that pulled you out of stupor, and you watched as your tears stained his chest, before your hands found his back, tightening your grip on him.
"Sempu..."
"Shh, kid. It's ok. You're ok... we're gonna be ok."
Over and over, lost again with no surprises Disappointments close your eyes And it gets colder and colder When the sun goes down
Neteyam was trying to calm himself as he was pacing the floor of his grandmother's tent, so much so the rugs were now matted and torn. He couldn't believe this. He couldn't believe you. After everything, everything that has happened, everything you've both done... after losing O'i'en and Oare, after destroying his relationship and all his plans for the future, after promising him you would never undo this arrangement, after threatening him you'd both get to burn together... after everything... how could you do this?
The anger was all-consuming as it was lighting his every nerve on fire, as it was playing back, in his mind, over and over, your relationship, your rise and fall, the fall that never seemed to end, no matter how hard he wished for it to end, no matter how hard he didn't. He thought about how broken you both were now that the the fall did come to its unsightly end, and how it left you both in pieces, in sharp shards that found each other's flesh to dig into and lacerate, unable to stop yourself from falling apart around each other even at the bitter final act. He thought about how he should be relieved. It was all he wanted, right? You out of his life. He could go back to the girl, the girl he didn't love, no matter how hard he tried, to the life he was once envisioning for himself. If you truly gave up on him, on your quest for revenge, he should be happy. All he's wanted for the past seven years was you out of his life, right? If all you had and all you were was over... if the nightmare was over, that meant a new dawn would be breaking soon. He should want it... right?
And maybe he would want it, maybe he would be happy about it, if only there wasn't this intense hatred blinding him to the truth of the matter, to the potential this new revelation opened up in his life. Because fuck, things changed. Things changed when Oare died, when his sister talked to him, things changed when you woke up, when he found you in the clearing... things changed when you slept together. He told you things, things he didn't even know he felt, but he did feel, as you came around him, as he saw your face writhing in pleasure when you left scratches down his back. He saw your eyes as they locked with his, and in your eyes, for just a moment, there were confessions that maybe you didn't speak out loud, but maybe you didn't have to.
And then... you just... left. You left him, abandoned him without a word, or an explanation, without as much as a disdained "good riddance, asshole". How could you have done this, after everything that's happened? After everything, Neteyam felt like he deserved at least that... or anything, but not this. Not the silence, not to be told about it by his mother. He deserved more than this.
His legs stilled in place and his stomach dropped as your words, the words you shouted at him yesterday kept rushing back to him like the river after a storm, unrelenting and powerful, ready to knock out everything in their wake.
“You keeping your mouth shut and going about your life as if your life wasn’t impermeably connected to mine was what fucking hurt me, Neteyam!"
"You saying nothing, doing nothing, acting like I didn’t exist, like I was just a toy you outgrew, that was worse than anything I could have ever fucking done to you, don’t you understand that?"
"Do you understand that you abandoned me? I was everything to you, and you just acted like that meant nothing at all."
Fuck.
Do you miss the rogue Who coaxed you into paradise and left you there?
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, Jake." you tried to contain the cries, you did, but as he held you tightly to his chest, caressing your almost-dry braids and cooing patiently in your ear, it was harder than you could manage in the moment. The sobs were loud and coming out in broken hiccups, but you couldn't find it in you to care anymore, and he didn't seem to mind.
"I did this, we did this... Neteyam and I, this stupid war, all the fights, and the battles, and the never-ending need to make the other pay... and all for nothing! All for something he heard, something I said, that I-... If he just asked, I could have told him, I could have explained, I -... fuck!"
"Shh... hey, look at me, kid." His fingers found your chin, that he raised, despite your silent protests, and you were taken aback by his own tears falling down his face, by the unending depth of emotion behind his beautiful, yellow irises, that reminded you a little too much of his eldest son.
"This wasn't your fault, baby girl. It was mine."
"I love you, you know? So much. I look at you, and I see Neytiri, and I see myself. I see your parents, I see this clan, that I chose to be a part of, that I'm grateful for every day of my life. This clan, this family I have, that includes you, this planet... it saved me from myself, from a broken path. And the thought of losing you, losing any of it... it haunted my every dream, it turned into a recurring nightmare that kept me up at night. So I did the only thing I knew how - I tried to mould you into the soldiers I knew you needed to be in order to survive the humans and their poisoned reach, their need to hurt and kill."
You were in awe of his monologue, that you didn't want to - you couldn't - interrupt. You needed to hear this, and he needed to speak it, and so you waited, and listened, and he spoke and cried.
"I thought I was doing the right thing. A father protects. But I failed to recognise how that would affect you, how much the pressure I put on your shoulders, on Neteyam's shoulders, would come to hurt you, to push you to this point. My words and my actions were what drove you both to the dark place you find yourselves in right now, and I'm sorry."
You tightened your grip on him yet again, and let his words sink in you, pass through you. You let them succumb you, like the water in the lake as it took over your body, until you were submerged in it, until you were a different person as you emerged back into the world.
"I'm still learning, kid. We all are... We all make mistakes, and sometimes the mistakes hurt and they cut and they fester, sometimes they are big enough to take over your whole world and eclipse any light shining through. But... people deserve a second chance. People deserve to be able to make amends, to fight to show you they can do better. And I hope I'm one of those people. And I hope Neteyam is, too. I think you two were meant for each other - I saw it every day of your lives, from when you were best friends to best enemies, you completed each other, complemented each other. You made each other better... and worse. But maybe that shows that one of you can't exist without the other. That maybe the connection you have is more than anything life can throw at you, or that you can throw at each other. Maybe it's time for both of you to get a second chance."
Will you forgive my soul When you're too wise to trust me and too old to care?
Neteyam felt dizzy and nauseous, a sudden need to anchor himself onto the ground more necessary than he could ever remember feeling. Seven years worth of mistakes came rushing over him, ready to swallow him whole. Is this how you felt? This whole time... this is how you felt? So insignificant and small, so used... abandoned, angry and heartbroken... just how he felt. He made you feel this way, he made 12 year old Vi, the person he loved most in the world, feel this way. You left him, just as he left you, and now Neteyam finally could see, finally understood, that you were right. It was worse. The not knowing, the self-doubt and guilt, the feeling like you were nothing more than a toy, ready to be outgrown, knowing you were disposable to someone you thought loved you... it was worse.
He knew he had to find you, he had to, he had to talk to you, he had to tell you all the words his heart was begging him to shout of the top of his lungs, begging him to stop holding inside of it, for it was done keeping his secrets, for all it wanted was to feel again, to dream again... to love again. But it would have to wait. Just a little bit more, it would have to wait, because right now, Oare needed him. Oare would be put to her eternal rest today, and before the ceremony, she still needed to be cleaned and prepared, and while you might not feel capable of facing such a challenge right now, he could do this for you. This he could do, and would, because he needed to, and he knew, deep down, you did, too.
It took a long time, but near eclipse, the ikran was ready, and Neteyam felt a pang of hurt taking in her beauty, so ethereal and extraordinary, so much like the person who came to call her a sister. The person whose voice stopped Neteyam dead in his tracks and sent shivers down his spine.
“Neteyam…?” 
When he turned, and saw you, eyes puffy and red, filled with tears that weren’t the first you were shedding, based on the deep stains on your beautiful face, your chest heaving in panted, uneven breaths, released in soft, sorrowful sobs, he couldn’t help in himself, and with a few steps, he closed the distance between you and enveloped you in a tight, rib-cracking hug, one that, to his unending relief, you reciprocated immediately. 
“She’s dead, Neteyam… she’s really dead. I wasn’t there for her and now she’s dead.” You were sobbing in his chest, and he tried not to let the moment overwhelm him, this moment that felt more like dreams he’s had than the reality he had to live through, ones in which you came to him, and let your guard down, one in which he got to comfort you instead of bring you pain, ones in which you were his and he was yours, one in which things were good, and pure, like you were. 
Were you waiting at our old spot In the tree line, by the gold clock? Did I leave you hanging every single day?
“I’m surprised you’re still alive after today’s training. Dad’s not going easy on you, is he?” Neteyam looked at the little girl, laying on the ground, chest heaving, with eyes of steely determination he doesn’t think are like anything he’s ever see before, and how the tears that pooled in your eyes refused to drop, no matter how oversaturated they got. The tears just didn’t drop. He watched intently, determined to see the first one fall, determined to prove to himself that a girl who’s never trained before, a girl who just lost her parents, a girl who was not from a family of warriors, like his was, wouldn’t be able to withstand the pressure that his father never failed to put on him, and he now seemed intent on putting on you.
But much to his surprise, the tears never did fall. Instead, you got up, canines sunk in so deeply, the blood was pouring out of your lower lip - anything to stop the sob of pain he knew you wanted to let out. When you were on your feet again, you ran your hands over your bloodied knees, where the gashes were still spilling red liquid from when you fell off a cliff and scraped them, before shaking them dry. Neteyam watched in awe as the blood dripped from your fingers and into the ground, and all of a sudden, he was left behind, your footsteps echoing through the forest as you made your way back to the practice arena.
“Guess he knows I can take it.” 
Were you standing in the hallway with a big cake? Happy birthday Did I paint your bluest skies the darkest gray? A universe away
"Have you ever considered, Neteyam, that I'm not your enemy? I see you, waiting for me to fail, praying that your dad... and my dad, were wrong about me. Have you ever considered I could help? That if I do this, you don't have to be alone anymore?"
Neteyam's eyes went as wide as his mouth as you turned to face him once more, a soft smile on your face and crinkles around your eyes, that almost hid the soft tears that dropped down your cheeks and mingled with the blood as they reached your lips, and he felt his heart skip a beat, and then two, then three... What was happening to him?
"I'm alone, too. I'm all alone. And I'm scared... of being alone. Of ending up alone. And I think you are, too. So maybe... maybe we can be alone together."
Almost as if controlled by a disembodied presence, Neteyam's body started moving on its own accord until it reached you, until his hand was in your extended one, a peace symbol you both learnt from the once-human Olo'eyktan.
“Friends?”
“Friends.”
And when I got into the accident The sight that flashed before me was your face But when I walked up to the podium I think that I forgot to say your name
“I know… I’m so sorry, Vi.” His hands found your face, that he angled upwards to look into your eyes, holding you tightly, as if letting go meant letting go forever, and he couldn’t, not anymore, not until he told you what he needed to say. Your warm breath brought life into him as he inhaled it, and the courage given by the revelations that loomed over him his entire life, but were only manifested today, it was enough to speak the words nestled in his chest. 
“I’m so sorry… not just about Oare, but about everything. Vi, you were right. I did this, I started this. I should have… I should have trusted you, and confided in you. I should have given you the respect you deserved, the consideration of telling you what hurt me. You deserved the chance to explain your point of view, and I took that from you. What you said hurt me… what my dad said hurt me, but… you were my best friend, and I should have come to you. I should never have let you go, Vi. I’m so sorry.”
The words you've waited for what seemed like your whole life opened the dam of your soul, so carefully put together over so many years, now broken as it flooded your whole being with the full force of the sorrow and relief you've buried so deep, you didn't even know if you'd be able to ever make it surface again. But there it was, and his words brought your own forth, and with Jake's words in mind, with lessons of forgiveness and second chances learnt, you spoke, hoping he'd listen, hoping these words could undo at least some of the hurt you put the other through.
“I’m sorry, too. Teyam, I’m so sorry. After losing my parents, you, this family, were all I had. You were everything to me, and I came to rely on you so much, I couldn’t envision life without you. When you left, it broke something in me. It brought back feelings I was yet to deal with, ghosts that haunted me in the middle of the night, insecurities that continue to plague me to this day, fears of being unlovable, of being too much, of not being enough. I have always been too harsh, too guarded, I have always answered every problem with my fists first and my mind second. I’ve never known how to deal with grief, and so I did it in the only way I knew how - by turning it to anger. By making you the enemy. Every time your absence hurt, I needed my presence to hurt you. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being cruel, I’m sorry for taking it too far. I’m so sorry.” 
It was necessary, this moment that was long overdue, and although you were sorrowful of the fact it took losing so much for you to realise it, you were grateful that did come in the end. You were happy that, as you moved your head slightly to rest your ear against his chest, listening to his slowly-calming heartbeat, you felt safe again in his embrace while you finally took in your sister’s body, that he spent more time that you could even conceive getting her ready for the ceremony, when you didn't. You were grateful that you didn’t have to go through it by yourself, but with the one person who’s known Oare just as long as you, who’s loved her just as much as you loved Seze, the person who despite it all, knew you to your core - your biggest dreams, your biggest worries, your biggest fantasies, your biggest fears. And here it was, the biggest fear, manifested in front of you like a sleep-paralysis demon, that you had no choice but to brave through, but at least, right in this moment, you didn’t have to brave it alone. 
"Thank you. For taking care of her while I couldn't."
"You don't have to thank me. So many things might have changed between us, but this... this never will."
The ceremony was as hard on you as you expected, and by the end, you were so spent, both physically and emotionally, you knew you were in dire need of a nap, one that didn't end in the morning, and maybe not for a few good days. You looked over at Neteyam, who kept his distance, allowing you to be caged in between Lo'ak and Kiri's bodies while you mourned, but who helped you lower Oare into the tree nook where she would lay forever, shedding silent tears as he placed an atokirina on her, his hand finding your lower back as you both said your final goodbyes.
One day, you'd find another ikran. One day, you'll be able to fly again, and think of flying as the beautiful, freeing experience you have come to rely on for your sanity and happiness for the last 7 years. One day. But not today. And not for a long time. Oare made your life special, and worth living. Flying meant what it did to you in no small part because of her. Her thoughts, peaceful and serene, a nice balance to your own, kept you steady and focused in battled, mid flight. Not being able to return the favour would be something you'll have to deal with in time, but as you felt your entire family's presence surrounding you, enveloping you in love and care, as you felt Neteyam's lips make contact with the side of your head in a gesture you've known him capable of, just not with you, you knew, one day, you'll be okay again.
'Cause we were like the mall before the internet It was the one place to be The mischief, the gift-wrapped suburban dreams
It was hot and humid in the forest as you trained - something about the deforestation brought about by the humans made the weather feel hotter, or so the human scientists told you. Either way, you felt as though you were inhaling water instead of air as you tried to catch your breath, the last drill always the hardest in the routine, always the one that broke most Na’vi who were unfortunate enough to be considered good enough to be trained directly by Toruk Makto himself… but not you. You did it, feeling fire in your lungs and sweat mingling with the blood spilling from various cuts from across your body and exacerbating the sting you felt prickling like needles throughout your whole being. Each muscle felt like it was being split in half, but you couldn’t care less. Not now, not when you were so close to beating Neteyam, not when victory would feel so sweet, not when you would be able to collapse in the dirt and pass out the moment it was over. 
In the few months since the ceremony, life was more about healing for you than it had ever been. It was a nice change of pace, the peace, one you haven’t known since your parents were still alive, and for the first time in your life, you felt… almost whole. There were still things missing of course - your parents, who you kept in thoughts and prayers every day, and your sister, who you swore Eywa reincarnated in your new ikran, whose thoughts reminded you too much of hers for it to be mere coincidence. 
“Vi, you better focus if you want to have any chance at beating me.”
You scoffed, and watched as he flew past you, not before sending a small wink your way, that made you lose your footing for a second, before quickly composing yourself and continuing.
“Don’t get cocky, mighty warrior.”
As far as your relationship with Neteyam went, it took a long while, but in time, you managed to mend what once seemed unmendable and earn each other’s trust once more. It was an uphill battle, most days, but you were grateful to have your best friend back, and to be able to finally meet the Neteyam everyone knew and loved, the one that was kind and considerate, funny and charming, helpful and loving to everyone around him. You were grateful that now, that included you, too. Your mateship was never brought up again, not to the family, that knew you needed this time, and was happy to let you have it. The possibility of it was no longer looming over you like a threat, but more like a golden aura of inevitability that you wouldn’t mind giving into, once the pieces were soldered back together through the mutual effort you were both willing to put into to rebuild both your broken hearts. One day he'd be yours and you'll be his… 
But not today, as he beat you, with just barely a split second to spare.
“Ah, that’s too bad… maybe one day. One day, you’ll beat me at this, and on that day, Vi, I will fall to my knees in eternal servitude.” 
When you kicked him in the shin, with all your might, and watched as he fell on his knees in front of you, you smirked, the grin wild and unwavering as you circled him, lifting his chin with your index finger and willing him to look in your eyes, mischievous and filled with amusement. 
“Hmm, look! You’re already on your knees, Teyam. Now… about the eternal servitude…”
You had no time to react as he grabbed your wrist in his hand and pulled you towards him, until you both fell on the ground, and when he kissed you, you melted, like you normally did in the few times it has happened since that first time, in your clearing. You promised you’d take it slow, but in your defence, you were only Na’vi, and this was, in fact, a lot slower than how you wanted to take it. 
You let his fingers roam your body and rejoiced at the way his lips were warm and skilled as they moved on yours, his tongue tracing your bottom lip before you parted them, allowing yourself the pleasure of this kiss, that meant so much to you, that you will never ever take for granted again. 
“You taste fucking amazing, tsxepvi. Maybe next time, if you apologise and behave, you’ll actually get to cum.” 
You both laughed in the kiss, and with a mental note to yourself to apologise and behave tonight, you knew you were ready to take the next step in this new life, one which neither you or Neteyam would ever have to brave alone ever again. When your lips parted, and he got up from the ground with a soft groan, images of your childhood flashed before your eyes, warm and beautiful, once more, as he stretched out a hand for you. You took it gratefully, allowing him to help you rise, making a silent promise to yourself to commit to more risings than falls, for as long as you could help it.
"Friends?"
"Friends."
The sight that flashed before me was your face Over and over, when the sound goes down
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