#draft 4 locked

[rawliverandcigarettes]

HALFWAY HOME - Presentation Post (2022)

The night Shlee hatches in the trunk of a skycar, an asari watches and cries. She promises he will survive, at all and every cost. Shlee believes her. He stomachs the resentment of his alien sisters forced into hiding with him, and dreams about the stars. But the Milky Way is vast, swirling; painfully interwoven. And when Shlee begins to wonder who he is, who he should be, and what secrets keep this fragile galaxy from splitting apart, perhaps it's already too late.

----

Shlee T’selvi, a young salarian raised by asaris in secret, reckons with the complex circumstances of his birth and why he represents a threat to the brittle politics of the galaxy in the looming shadow of the Reaper invasion.

Halfway Home is a fan fiction of approximately 174k words based on the space-opera video game trilogy Mass Effect. This story has been crafted with the intent to be understandable by fans as well as people who never interacted with the original material. While most of the story happens during the run of the trilogy (Mass Effect 1, Mass Effect 2 and half of Mass Effect 3 to be exact), Shlee’s story only loosely connects to Commander Shepard’s, and hopes to focus on the universe with a different lens.

It is a Gen fic, with an Explicit rating.

Halfway Home explores themes of identity, community, violence, and connection, and take them from the Citadel Tower’s secrets all the way to Omega’s fragile hold on galactic power. It attempts to depict perspectives the original trilogy didn’t always consider: batarians and their brutal and systematic dismantlement, salarians in conflict with themselves, the sudden rise of humanity assessed from alien eyes, Aria T’loak and those she sacrificed; and at heart, the societal dysfunction that the Reaper War merely revealed.

This is a coming of age, a mystery, a character exploration. It is also a very rough tale that touches on difficult and painful topics, sometimes in explicit details (I highly encourage you to read the list of trigger warnings if this is something that worries you, because these are not a joke).

This is the first part of the Halfway Homes series, and will be weekly published, starting in November 2022, on Archive of our Own.

(YOU CAN READ IT HERE NOW)

----

▪ The Process ▪

I have been working on this story since 2015; early September, to be exact. It’s been my companion ever since; sometimes, it’s been my only companion. The story and characters helped me through very dark times, to the point where I’m not sure I would be here today without it; it also taught me how to write in English, which incidentally landed me a job in my career of choice and allowed me the immense privilege of becoming a professional storyteller in the videogame industry.

I always owe so much to my projects, but this one is special. It stayed with me the longest, and potentially saw me growing the most. And while I would hardly say this story is perfect, far from it, I think it has finally attained the form it always wanted to achieve. It’s saying what it had been wanting to say. And given I believe that art is first and foremost about communication, I think I can, cautiously, call this attempt a success?

The process is not completely done yet. I am still waiting for one last small round of beta reading, to make sure I did fix the things and didn’t cause 25 critical errors in the process; I also want to give this project the highest possible chance to shine, and so I’ll be drawing a ton and work on visuals to accompany it all. But it feels insane, after 7 years of work, to look at a project and not being quite sure what to fix. I’m sure there are things worth tweaking (especially surface-level, like line edits, typos, small clarity issues still lingering, or my bold refusals to ignore the English form sometimes), but I can’t think of any right now. This never happened before. This feels wild.

I was also delighted to discover I am not sick to death with Mass Effect, these characters and this personal take on the universe! I am thrilled to be keep on working on the follow-ups. The Empire of Preys, the second part of the Halfway Homes series, is well underway, and it’s going great so far. I am very optimistic that I can publish it somewhere in 2024 given my rate of writing and how seamless the process is going right now (contrary to Halfway Home, which is one Frankenstein monster of a project). TEoP is, overall, a much more pleasant and less desperate project than Halfway Home ever was, which makes it less difficult to handle (let me tell you that HH has some *interesting* scenes to grammar check…..)

Either way, I am so happy to finally be (mostly) putting Halfway Home to rest, present my weird, messy, problematic child to the world of Tumblr dot com, and prepare for finally letting it run free in Ao3 this coming November.

My ask box is always opened for any follow-up questions or remark, and I wish you all the very, very best.

Here's the complete list of all Trigger Warnings for the series. Please check it out if you suffer from traumatic stress disorders, and always take care of yourself. <3

#mass effect #fanfiction #halfway home #shlee #khocress #my writing #salarians #the empire of preys #salarian #I am Basically Done #it doesn't feel true #draft 4 locked #just one more and then it's forever locked #;_;

[saetoshi]

“it’s rude to stare.”

you blink, a startled gasp slips past your lips. chigiri frowns at you.

you raise your notebook to shield your face from his glare, “i know.”

“then why have you been staring at me for the past ten minutes?”

you peer at him behind your notebook. “because you’re pretty.”

his face flushes. you chuckle when you notice the shy expression that’s on his face. he looks prettier when he’s blushing, you note. he hides his face behind his hands.

you gently call out his name, dropping your notebook back on the table. he lowers his hands from his face, cheeks ablaze. you smile at him. his face burns bright even more.

“it’s polite to say thank you after a compliment,” you tease.

he glares at you. “it’s also polite not to stare, but whatever.”

you roll your eyes, hands reaching out over the table. chigiri looks at your outstretched hands, then glances back up at you with a confused expression.

“gimme your hands.”

his eyes widen and he quickly shakes his head. you click your tongue, a pout settling on your lips.

“why not?”

a shy expression settles on his face, “you’ll just keep staring at me.”

“so?” you gently grab one of his hands, “you deserve to be admired.”

his ears flush. he looks away, chewing his bottom lip. (still, he lowers his other hand into yours.)

“hyoma.”

he turns his face away from you, hiding behind his hair. he shrinks in his chair when your thumbs trace patterns over his knuckles.

“hyoma,” he feels like his whole body is burning when you softly call out his name, “look at me.”

he peeks at you behind his hair. he slowly turns to face you, eyes glassy and a pout on his lips.

you smile, “you’re the prettiest ever.”

“you’re cruel.” he sniffles.

you blink, tilting your head in confusion.

“you keep complimenting me a lot lately,” he leans against his chair, “and you haven’t given me a chance to compliment you back.”

the corners of his lips quirk up teasingly, “you’re also supposed to be studying.”

“i studied plenty,” you huff. “besides, telling you you’re pretty is a far better way to spend my time.”

there’s a small pause as he laces his fingers with yours, gently squeezing your hand. he looks at you, eyes full of warmth. “the moon and stars pale in comparison to your beauty.”

(his voice wavers when he says it, face bright red. he’s not sure how he managed to say it without cringing.)

he laughs when he sees your wide eyes. he playfully kicks you under the table. you stare at the wall behind him, gaping.

“if you’re going to compliment someone,” he teasingly smiles when you look at him, “do it right.”

you laugh in disbelief, “are you trying to seduce me?”

he shifts in his seat, “is it working?”

“maybe.” you grin, “you should keep trying just to be sure.”

he rolls his eyes. you stick your tongue out at him.

“you’re incorrigible.” he shakes his head.

you smile, “i try.”

“if i keep complimenting you,” he tucks his hair behind his ear, “will you keep studying?”

you make a face. “we’ll see.”

“ok, then,” his eyes sparkle with determination,“prepare be to swept off your feet!”

#IM FINALLY BREAKING FREE FROM ITOSHI SAE !!!!!!!! #(i have 4 drafts for him send help) #anw chigiri my babiestgirl #CHIGIRI HYOMA BABYGIRL !!!!!!!!!!! #bllk x reader #blue lock x reader #bllk x you #chigiri x reader #blue lock x you #bllk fluff #bllk scenarios #blue lock fluff #bllk chigiri #blue lock chigiri #chigiri hyoma x reader #chigiri hyoma #chigiri x you #chigiri hyoma x you

[changingplumbob]

I know you are TRAPPED

That is the whole point! For you to STAY

#sims 4 #the sims #the sims 4 #simblr #toddlers be crazy #stay in high chair #high chair lock saves my sanity #Draft from the past #Behind the screen

[tboygareth]

its not saturday yet but i already want to post chapters 3 and 4 of greatest hits

chapter 5 isn't even close to ready tho so i will resist

#bee.txt #i've read reread and edited chs 3 and 4 to death and im finally mostly satisfied with them #transitions are a little weird tho #its giving adhd #which is fine! maybe it'll add to the eddie-ness?? of it all?? #wip wednesday is two days away and i already have it locked and loaded in my drafts #im sooooo excited about ch4 #cant wait to see bitches FERAL in my comments <3

[madebyancientomens]

i think writing is 90% avoiding even looking at a document for weeks because you despise the thought of putting a single word to page and 10% writing more in a couple hours than you have in the last two months because you Just Love Writing So Much

#this post is about locked tomb fanfiction btw #ive been writing catholic lesbian fanfiction with hozier on repeat #this has culminated in 4 unfinished drafts with 1000 words each and a plethora of notes #the peak of mental health #m rambles

[buckyalpine]

Cheating!Steve x reader, Bucky x reader

Oh look, more cheating Steve with sweetheart Bucky to save us

A/N: Last year someone asked me for some mad angsty fic and I posted and deleted it so quick because it was god awful. Just awful. However, I had kept a draft of it cause even though I hated it and everything about it, I didn't want it gone forever. Upon rereading it recently...I kinda like it. So I decided to change some stuff (like most of the entire plot), switch around characters (I'm a Bucky girl) and repost. If you want to see the OG fic, I can post it again or just edit this to add it under the new version

Steve couldn't stand seeing you like this. In the hospital room, the needles prodding you, it all reminds him of hydra and the things he had seen on numerous missions. When you almost die, he's thrown back into the spiral where he has no hope for a future. And nothing changes after you get better. You had almost died once. Missions were getting riskier and you weren't always in the clear. In his mind, everything good in his life leaves him or gets ripped away eventually. Peggy was a prime example of that. It's just a matter of time.

Even in your injured state, your attention was all on Steve. You knew how much he hated seeing you hurt. It sent him into a dark place few people had witnessed. As soon as your eyes fluttered open, your tired eyes met his red rimmed, puffy ones. For days, every time you try to bring him back to you, he has his walls built up again.

He won't let himself love you more.

He drinks.

He drinks enough to get drunk. It takes bottle after bottles but he doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything any more. So much so, he decides to seek the warmth of someone else.

Because you almost left him.

You could die so easily.

You almost did.

Nothing matters any more. His moans of pleasure are empty but he's wrapped around her none the less. He doesn't stop until his body can't move, too exhausted to even think about guilt.

-

You have it all planned out. You were finally released from the hospital and the first thing you wanted to do was spend time with Steve. The team had left the compound so you could set up a movie night for you and the captain, you don't want to let him slip from your grasp, not after all you'd been through together. You didn't go through hell and back to lose him like this. You fought for your life to pull through.

There are snacks laid out on the table, a movie pulled up, some hot chocolate made just for you and him. You shuffle nervously, your heart beating erratically. You didn't spend 4 years with him just for this to end because you nearly died. No. He was worth the fight. His cold demeanor was not towards you but towards the fear of losing you. And that fear was from love. Love you both shared deeply for each other.

You knew he got back from the bar late; if he was too drunk then you'd help him to his room and talk to him in the morning. It was a new habit of his but you understood.

Except he never came. He always made it home. Not tonight.

Steve stumbled in the next morning, rubbing his eyes, seeing a small sleeping form on the sofa, snacks and some drinks laid out in the living room. He swallowed thickly when he sees you get up from the couch wearing one of his hold hoodies, making your way towards him.

"Steve?"

You have a soft smile on your face, but it drops when you get a closer look at him. Tears prickle at your eyes when you see the way his neck is littered in bruises, his skin still flushed. He can't look you in the eyes, not after what he'd just done.

"I-

You freeze before him, you don't want to ask. You don't want to know. The broken expression his face is enough for you. You wordlessly leave the living room, locking yourself in, giving FRIDAY instructions to make sure no one can enter.

"Did you talk to y/n" Bucky asks excitedly when he sees Steve sitting in the living room. He knows how excited you were about the movie night, spending days planning every last detail. His excitement drops when he sees the food untouched and you're nowhere to be seen. "Where is she?"

Steve remains silent, staring at his hands. The rest of the team enter the living room, hoping to find you both curled on the couch, but no. Nat's eyes narrow when she sees the hickeys on Steve's neck but something tells her they're not from you, you've never marked him like that before, you've always been so gentle with him.

"How could you?" She hissed, while the rest of the team look at her in confusion. It doesn't take long for them to piece things together. And it's a mess.

You come down to the living room, both Sam and Tony holding Bucky down on the couch while he glares at Steve, his hands still in fists. They all turn towards you with broken eyes, this is not what they ever wanted for you. The second he sees you, he breaks down. You're numb to his cries, his pleas.

He finds you leaving the compound at 1:00 AM from where he's still seated on the couch, something you'd never done before.

"Baby? Where are you going"

You ignore him, making your way to the garage. You were never able to sleep since and staying in bed only left you alone with your thoughts.

"I-I need some space. Don't worry about where I'm going"

"Y/n, please, just let me explain"

"No"

"I made a mistake, I-

"I don't care. I just want need some air"

"Promise me you'll come back?"

You shake your head, you can't even look at Steve. You scoff, shoving past him, not caring when he hisses in pain. His cheek is bruised, spots of dark purple and blue bloom around his eye and you'd seen Nat icing Bucky's hand earlier.

"Y/n, please angel, I-I just want to talk, just promise me you'll come back?"

"I promise" You reluctantly mumble, hopping on your motor bike and speeding off before Steve can call after you again.

You loved him so much.

You fought so hard to pull through for him, you heard every word he'd said to you when you were unconscious.

Tears clouded your vision.

It all happens too fast for you to comprehend.

The car doesn't see you.

The bend is sharp.

You bike is sent over the edge.

Darkness.

-

It's been a week.

You still haven't woken up.

It's all his fault. It doesn't matter that the driver was intoxicated. It didn't matter that it was dark out. You wouldn't have left the compound if he hadn't done what he did and it eats him alive.

He's not met with any sympathy.

No one bats an eye at his tears or sobs, too concerned about your well being to go and comfort him. Like clock work, every member of the team visits on rotation since they can't all be there at once. however Bucky is exempt from all hospital rules with one brooding, grumpy stare.

Bucky is by your side every single day. He doesn't say anything when Steve grips your hand, praying for you to wake up, silently praying himself while your heart monitor continues to beep. Steve refuses to move from your side but he's not given much of a choice when Fury summons him personally for someone mission related.

He's only gone for a few hours but that's when you finally stir. Bucky is on his feet instantly, paging for the doctor while stroking your hair.

"Hey pretty girl" Bucky whispers when your eyes finally focus, the knuckles of his metal hand gently caressing your cheek. The cool sensation helps you feel more alert. You smile seeing his baby blue eyes, feeling safe as he talks to you softly.

-

Everything hits Steve all at once. He didn't just betray you. He betrayed the team. His bestfriend. Himself. All the people who had faith in him to make the right choice, to do the right thing, to protect them. And he threw it away. Everyone waited a month for you to fully recover before throwing a welcome back party so you'd actually be able to enjoy it. Steve looked back longingly at the happy group gathered together in the living room, more emotions hitting him again.

He was happy you were alive. His sweet, sweet girl pulled through. H

He was envious of the love everyone was sharing, one he wasn't privy to anymore. He was invited, he was still apart of the team after all but he knew it wasn't his place.

He was jealous.

Jealous of the way you melted into Bucky's side. Longing to feel that warmth that he used to feel himself. Bucky had his arm around your waist, keeping you tucked right by him, taking care of you long after you were discharged. He wasn't going to stop any time soon.

There was something between you two, everyone could sense it. The soft gazes at each other and innocent kisses. Bucky wouldn't let a day go by without pressing his lips to your cheek, your nose, your forehead, the top of your head. He needed you to know you were loved and cared for. He stuck to his guns, claiming his actions were purely platonic but the pink blush on his cheeks proved that he was a bald faced liar.

-

Steve knows theres no one to blame but himself. He sighs and swallows the lump in his throat as you stand on your tiptoes to kiss the brunette, sealing you both together forever. He's always thought it would be the two of you standing together at the alter but how things had changed. The cheers of the crowd are a dull buzz to him. He watches Bucky swoop in for another kiss, this time dipping you and capturing your lips sweetly.

"I love you Mrs. Barnes"

"I love you more, Mr. Barnes"

Your happy, love struck giggles cause the first tear to fall.

He does his best to smile when you both walk by, flashes of what your wedding would have looked like. The white dress. The veil. The flowers.

if only he never-

But it was too late.

#bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky angst #marvel angst #bucky barnes x f reader #bucky fluff #bucky x fluff #bucky x you #bucky x f reader #james bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #james bucky buchanan barnes #cheating captain america #cheating!steve rogers #cheating steve rogers #ex!steve x reader #stever rogers x reader #captain america angst #steve rogers angst #steve x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fan fic

[xxblairexxss]

Sharing is caring

Pairing : dad!Charles Leclerc x mom!reader

Theme : Fluff

Another short one because this has been in my draft for a while.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

charles_leclerc

Liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc and 1,820,638 others

charles_leclerc My world ❤️

username1 cuteeeeeee 🥹😩

username2 that matching ribbons! ugh so adorable

username3 my dreeam! 🥹🥹🥹🥹

ynusername

Liked by charles_leclerc, calra.broker and 633,929 others

ynusername Excited for her popcorn 🍿

username1 THAT LITTLE FEET

username2 omg she’s so cuteeeeee

username3 bowl is too big 😭😂😂

username4 that small hand on the bowl 🥹

"1, 2, 3–"

The sweet, lovable voice filled up your kitchen as your little one counted everything you put on her plate. She had just started learning numbers, so everything that she could count, she wouldn’t miss a chance.

"5!"

"No, honey. It’s 4, then 5. There you go. Can you carry it?" You leaned down to slowly place the plate on her little hands. She was always excited for her snack time because you would put all different things together, so she had more choices for her food. This time, you had prepared frozen banana yoghurt bites, small slices of apples, a few small peanut butter bites, and some goldfish crackers.

"No! I carry."

"Okay, careful!" You were going to help her bring the plate to her small table in the living room, but she wanted to do everything on her own now.

"Need dada’s help?" Charles heard the little steps tapping against the floor first before he saw his little girl with a plate full of her snacks. The plate was bigger than her face, and it was a bit of a struggle to carry it but she kept on denying every offer of help.

"No!" She placed it on her table, looked at her dad with the biggest smile and started clapping her hands. "Yay!"

"Yay! What have you got there?"

"This.." She pointed at the frozen banana yoghurt bites and took one in her hand. "Banana!"

"That one?" Charles pointed at the goldfish cracker.

"That is fish!" She took one and munched on it, her cheeks puffing out from trying to chew them thoroughly.

"Can dada get some?”

"Let me think!" She puckered her lips and scanned through her plate to decide which one she was going to give to Charles. "Dada want this?" She took a few goldfish crackers, leaving her with two left. "There. I need more fish! Dada wait!"

"Oh? You want me to wait here? Okay, baby. Can dada eat this?" He showed her the handful of crackers in his hand that she just gave.

"Yes!" She stood up wobbly and ran to the kitchen again, this time with a half-empty plate. There were only two crackers left and one banana bites. "Mommy, more?"

"Did you actually eat all of them? That was quick." Your brows furrowed as you took the pink-coloured plate from her.

"Dada ate too!" She giggled and extended her arms to get her plate back.

"What?" You peeked at your husband laying on the couch with a fistful of crackers, treating it as some sort of popcorn, while his eyes locked on the television. "Charles! Are you being serious? Stop taking her snacks!"

Your voice made him jumped, but he continued chomping on the crackers again. "Honey, she was the one who gave it to me."

“Well, then stop taking it!" You put a few more crackers into a small bowl this time before giving it to her. "Don’t share with daddy. This will be the last one, okay? No more."

"Thank you, mommy!" The sound of her footsteps clomping again as she ran back to her dad "Uh oh, mommy angry." She pulled a face and pointed her little finger at her dad, making him laugh.

"You cheeky girl! Mommy’s angry at me because of you." He pinched her chubby cheek as she munched on the crackers again. "Is it good?”

"Yes! Dada want?" She took one off her plate and handed it to Charles.

"It’s okay, baby. Dada’s full."

The little one frowned and looked down on her plate with her bottom lips jutting out, feeling rejected. The cracker she had in her small palm kept being twiddled in it.

Charles pressed his lips together to control his expression. His little girl had already learned how to give attitude if none of her requests were being obeyed. He would always get in trouble because you would scold him for being too fulfilling with her requests, but how could he say no to that squishy little face?

"Okay, okay. Give me one." She the handed him the one she had fiddling in her palm and squealed when Charles ate it.

"Dada more?" She offered another one and he shook his head again.

"No, thank you, baby."

"Please dada.." She pulled a pleading look with her big, round eyes, making him lose this round as well. She giggled and put the cracker in his mouth when he leaned closer.

You then walked into the living room with your hands crossed, glaring at your husband, who was still chewing on something. "Can you stop taking your daughter’s snack?"

"I’m not, honey! I swear! Right, baby?"

"Dada wants more!" She squealed, making Charles’s mouth wide open.

"Honey, don’t listen to her!"

"Well, she obviously doesn’t know how to lie! Right, baby? Is dada taking your snack?" Your brows were still furrowed as you looked at your husband, who was speechless in his seat.

"She was the one who offered me the crackers!" Charles argued.

“Dada said more!” She shrieked and handed another one of the fish crackers to Charles, making you chew on your lips.

“You know, if you really want it, I can give the whole packet to you. Stop taking it from her.”

“I’m not, honey!”

✧.* general tag list! @i83andrew @cltrlne @karmabyfernando @ohthemisssery @ru-kru @tastebaldwin @f1obessed @love4lando @shinrjj @ietss @leclerc13 @darleneslane @buckybarnessweetheart

If your usernames were crossed, meaning I can’t tag you! 😭 Let me know if you would like to be removed or to be added to the tag list! Or if I missed anyone!

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #f1 imagines #charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagines #f1 imagine #f1 x reader

[onsomenewsht]

now playing: Colorado

< track 2 || track 4 >

》 Alexia Putellas x Reader

》 words count: +1k

》 I'd choose the devil I know over the heaven I don't

The end starts with you finding the ring.

“Alexia, I swear to your good knee, if you’re not ready I’m gonna sell your Ballon d’Or”, your announcement resonating through the rooms. 

You’ve been ready for an entire hour now, beaming and excited for the opportunity to present with your teammates a special award named after your captain. The only thing missing is your perfectionist girlfriend still hidden in the bathroom.

When you open the door, you cannot believe your eyes.

Alexia’s tattooed back is exposed in the criminally low backless dress she’s in, sure, but her hair is still dripping wet and she’s fighting with a makeup brush. Clearly losing, her frown is a well known hint for you. 

She’s not ready and now you have to find your way on the black market.

“Need help?”

“No”

“Yes, vamos a llegar tarde” (we’re late)

“No voy a llegar tarde si ni quiero ir” (I can’t be late if I don’t wanna go in the first place)

Your chuckle filling the room is enough to make the blonde smirk, but you know her well enough to read the subtle lines on her face. Her worries are clear, the reasons to be discovered and a solution to be found.

Taking place behind her figure, you set your hands on her sides and plant a couple of strategically placed kisses on her back and shoulders. Her fitted form relaxes right away under your lips.

When your eyes meet in the mirror it's like a story is being narrated, an understanding of each other that goes beyond big words and great gestures but holds the deep love shared.

Your fingers move to untangle the blonde’s wet hair, taking the time to dry and straighten each lock just as she likes.

“Lo siento” (I’m sorry)

Shy Alexia is a version of her few people meet, her stance a lot less intimidating than the one she portrays on the field or in front of hundreds of cameras. 

“No tienes nada de que arrepentirte, mi corazón” (Nothing to be sorry for)

“I lost time in the gym and I lost time in the shower and I guess I just don’t wanna go”, the English sentence giving away how much thought she put into it. 

The catalan turns to look directly into your eyes for the first time all day, you realise. She really doesn’t want to go to this event, but your excitement and anticipation must have helped hide it throughout the week.

“Eres preciosa, mi amor” (You’re beautiful), she simply states, taking in the perfectly ironed black dress you’re wearing and the meticulously braided hair framing your face.

You smile at her, you love her.

“I know you don’t like the idea of this award, I know you don’t want us handing it to you with a carefully drafted speech”

“¡Lo escribiste!” (You wrote it, didn’t you?)

“Jana helped, all the team did”

Alexia’s eyebrow rises and you don't miss the fact she has a little bit more makeup on than usual, a sight she’s putting an effort.

“I supervised, don’t worry”

“No es reconfortante” (It’s no reassuring)

But her shoulders are relaxed, her frown no longer creasing her beautiful face. The blonde is calmer now and you take it as a victory she never actually asked you to ditch the all thing and hide together under a blanket with a mindless dating show in the background.

“Lo leerás?” (Will you read it?)

“Banned me to even come close to a microphone”, to be fair, it was a single accident and they should’ve not let the anchor’s line open when you just won a championship and your girlfriend’s literally glowing.

She bursts out laughing and you know she’s ready.

Almost ready.

“Take me the white heels while I finish esto”, her fingers moving somehow awkwardly around her mouth, “Y estamos listos!” (And we’re ready to go).

You place a soft but firm kiss on her lips, leaving for her shoes rack.

You’re looking for a pair of heels, one she hates to wear but well designed and a perfect fit with her dress. One she doesn’t wear much so it’s probably hidden in a box in the back of the closet.

That’s why you’re looking for a hidden box of shoes.

That’s where you notice a velvet little box.

That’s how you find the ring.

It’s a beautiful ring. Stunning cut, your precise size. A modest but expertly crafted gem complementing the simple band. It’s the perfect ring.

You don’t like shiny thing, Alexia could ask you to marry her with paper or grass from Camp Nou and you’re gonna say yes regardless.

But that’s exactly the problem.

You love her, you really do. You love her so much you gladly do whatever she asks, if she wants it enough to ask. You keep her love above your own and that’s fine, you’re happy with it. What she loves comes before what you love, naturally following immediately after anyway. 

And what she loves the most is usually you, so you never questioned it. 

However, when her love starts coming despite yours, you realise you can’t keep doing it.

The shift is difficult to perceive, coming at such a silent but excruciating pace that’s impossible to predict and devastating to take in.

The bomb dropped on you in the form of a tiny jewellery box that detonated when opened, shining ring inside.

“Està Narnia?” (You found Narnia?)

Closing the box and effectively concealing the ring from your gaze it’s a switch off. The silence that usually preempts a devastating explosion is coming after it, this one time.

“I’m ready!”

When she walks out of the bathroom, stunning as ever, you just stare. You never loved someone as much as you love her, that is obvious for a while now. 

You never loved and you will never love someone as much as you love her. 

Not even yourself.

“Estás bien?” (Are you okay?)

“T’estimo” (I love you)

Shining eyes almost give away all the meaning behind your words, but the captain fondly kisses you and it’s all good again.

Alexia takes the heels from your hands, when you manage to find them is not clear in your head, and sits on the bed. Your fingers intertwine as you bend on your knees and carefully tie the long white laces around her ankles.

“You good?”, she holds one of your hands and her stare is searching straight through your soul.

She has a ring hidden in a box, how long ago did she buy it?

“Let’s get you this award, mi corazón”

She wants to marry you, when will she ask?

Both your holds are firm and kind, she is calmed and ready. Now, somehow, she’s even happy to go to this event if you keep holding her hand like that.

If she asks, you will say yes.

#alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #woso x reader #woso imagine #woso fanfics #woso #alexia #ap11 #here we go again #with a flashback i think #so theres fluff #my wo(rd)so #Spotify #now playing universe

[mewgatori]

I don't view Limetta as a bad person. She IS,however, annoying.

#4/10 sibling. would probably lock her out of my room regularly #purple pond #phase 2 is going great. this'll be the last .5 chapter before I switch off to only whole number chapters for the rest of this draft set #pp scripts #script snippets

[mikareo]

megumi doing smth pls

⌗ THIRTEEN YEARS ₊ ˖ ་. megumi fushiguro x fem reader (2.6k)

⊹ ⠀⠀ 3 times megumi wants to tell you he loves you, and the 1 time he does.

contains; attack on titan au, marleyan!megumi, eldian!reader, aot spoilers!!! (season 4), forbidden lovers, fluff, angst, kissing, major character death, cannabalism? (titans), annie cameo! author's note; here u get an old draft (psa none of this will make sense if you haven't watched attack on titan!!!!)

i. what is love at first sight

it's almost human instinct; knowing which people are more likely to have good fortune. some are simply born with an advantage— these people having the freedom to walk along the river bank, skip flattened rocks down streams, and laugh with their peers. with families who shop in the market together, hand-in-hand with woven baskets strewn over their shoulders, and all the time in the world to live their lives to the absolute fullest as true freelancers facing the rising sun that sees tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that.

but in the truth of it all...the sun doesn't shine on everyone.

there are countless amounts of souls who aren't as blessed as marleyans like megumi. souls entangled with the devil herself, ymir, a woman who singlehandedly birthed the 'race from hell'...which he's never fully agreed with. everyone he knows refers to eldians as humanity's sin, but it's not their fault their biology is simply different.

humans are humans, right? they've done no wrong by being born. especially the warrior candidate he's been staring at for the past hour from a distance. you can't be that bad. after all, you're beautiful.

okay, yes. he has a little crush. he can't help it! one day, he was minding his own business on a walk home from the lab, when gojo had the bright idea of sneaking a peak at the warrior training. that's when megumi first saw you and his world stopped. sure, you were covered in mud and crawling through trenches with a rifle strapped to your back; but that didn't make him any less awestruck. since then he's hidden himself in the same bush, week after week, just to get a glimpse of your face.

"she's a cutie. you've got good taste." okay, creepy.

megumi rolls his eyes, glancing up at his mentor who's the only person who knows of his little secret. "don't you have women to harass?"

"ouch, sassed by a ten year old. i see how it is." gojo chuckles, ruffling his black hair and crouching down to the younger boy's level. "you see her out there? she's killing it. i heard she's the top contender for the female."

"i hope so." his blue eyes are locked on you, watching as your focused expression turns to determination whilst helping your teammate off the ground. "she'll have a better chance of living that way."

"...and maybe your family will let you meet her."

ugh, his family. since he was six, the zenin's have raised him with their questionable values and ideals. as the leading researchers in the modern world, they've revolutionized how eldians are studied! at least that's what he's been told. to be frank, he doesn't care about the right or wrong battle they've propagandized to the rest of humanity. all he cares about is knowing your name and telling you how pretty your eyes are.

"i want to talk to her, at least once." his voice is quiet, but gojo hears.

"why? you wanna tell her you love her?"

he hates him so much.

"no!" megumi exclaims, pushing back the older man in defense. his cheeks are bright red from embarrassment and he can feel the flames emitting from them. "i just want to be her friend, that's all. why do you always make things so weird?"

it's amusing to gojo how his little friend is so flustered. usually megumi is a shy boy, keeping to himself and avoiding contact with his peers; but whenever the conversation topic is you, he seems to perk up...and gojo loves to tease a lovestruck kid.

"don't worry," he smirks, "you'll understand your feelings when you're older. you don't need to tell her quite yet that you love her."

love you?

"just shut up and let me watch." megumi grumbles, resting his head in his hands as you're jumping up and down after being praised by your captain. he wishes he could make you that happy one day. "it's not love, i'm serious."

he'll understand what love means when he gets older. for now, he'll just imagine confessing.

ii. what is love that is forbidden

you're a lot more annoying than he thought you'd be.

after having been selected as the new female titan, your ego is boasting with energy and won't stop boasting no matter how often megumi tells you to zip it. though he was excited to meet you, his thirteen year old self now wishes you'd give him a moment of peace. instead, you insist on following him around whenever and wherever you can and yapping his ear off with comments on everyone and everything about your day. please, just give him a break.

"uh, fushiguro..."

he sighs with exhaustion. "what?"

"i think i locked us in here."

dammit.

"you forgot the key?" he asks.

"i forgot the key." you confirm.

of course you did.

with an exhausted grumble, megumi settles himself on the cold, cement floor of the supply closet you'll both call home for the next few hours. it's both of your days off, but he'd wanted to prep his supplies for his training on monday; to which you, of course, invited yourself along for the ride. you'll stay out of the way. it's fine, he can just ignore you. that's what he told himself...though, it's impossible for him to ignore you.

it's likely that no one will visit the storage room until the evening time— with most of his colleagues at home with their families, cooking a warm meal with lamb and stew. it's also uncommon for any of the researchers to be in liberio on their off days. megumi's just the special kind that doesn't think he'll be plagued by breathing the same air as eldians.

"mind if i join you?" he knows you're asking a rhetorical question and you know he'd never reject you.

with a small plop, you take a seat next to him. he's used to your warmth by now— considering you to be an essential part of his every day, despite how much he enjoys complaining about you— and leans his head against yours. it's obvious that you're sleepy. though, you never indulge in conversations about your training, megumi is well aware of how overworked you are. he can't imagine fighting in wars at this age, especially wars in which you're fourteen meters tall and smashing through brick walls; which is why he tries his best to be there for you when you need him.

your life is a battlefield and he's the peaceful conclusion.

"you know..." the sound of your voice is faint, a great contrast to your usual noise and megumi can tell something is wrong. "when they find us here, they're going to think i kidnapped you."

"i mean what else would the zenin heir be doing with a titan shifter?" you start to choke on your words and he instinctively wraps his arms around you. "you don't need to comfort me, fushiguro. we both know i'm going to be punished after this. you can't apologize and make everything okay like usual."

to your surprise, his pointer finger touches your cheek and gently wipes away your running tears. "...fushiguro—"

"it won't always be like this." he interrupts you, cupping your face as if you're a rare gem that he can't afford breaking. "when i'm in charge, i'm going to change things. you won't have to do this anymore. i won't let them do this to you anymore!"

the two of you are a mess on the floor, crying in each others arms, and wishing that the world was a better place. "you still have thirteen years left. please...please keep fighting for me. i promise i'm going to save you."

"fushiguro..."

"call me by my first name."

"...megumi."

you're beautiful. he wants to kiss you so badly, but he knows now isn't the time. he wants to hold your hand in public, but he knows you'll be berated for doing so. he wants to tell you he loves you, but he's too afraid.

megumi fushiguro is a coward.

...but he's a coward in love; and one day, when he's taller and stronger, he's going to be able to tell you that. he's going to be able to protect you.

iii. what is love that is hopeless

"hold still." megumi's voice is soft, his fingers of the same gentle malice as they tend to your open wounds that haven't quite healed yet. with titan steam wafting from the slashes scattering your forearms and shoulders, they blow into his face in a fury of pain. "dammit, i said hold still."

his brings both arms down to your shoulders, heart breaking at the sight of you wincing in retaliation to his force, but carries on. there's no telling what you would've gotten yourself into if he hadn't insisted he care for your wounds; after making it publicly known that he's to be the only researcher allowed within your vicinity after your tireless warrior missions, none of the other researchers even attempt to get near you. he hates how often you put yourself in harms way in order to save your comrades. you're too brave. you've never been just a warrior of marley, but more or less a warrior of all people.

"i've been sitting here for an hour already, megumi." you roll your eyes, swinging your legs over the metal rims and turning to face your very pissed off best friend. "i'm tired and i'd like to get at least an hour of sleep tonight."

his expression is somewhat terrifying. if you didn't know megumi was such a scaredy cat, you'd be intimidated by his reddened cheeks and eyes of fury. it's almost as if he's an inflamed torch held against fluorescent lighting, pasty and saturated in fear and exhaustion. "i need to make sure you're okay."

"well, i have another plane to catch at dawn," you deflect his concerns. "there's some issue i was assigned to when i landed this morning. i guess one of our enemies isn't afraid of titans yet."

"you're not going."

he's firm in his statement. megumi doesn't like how his colleagues take advantage of you and your abilities. they're working you to skin and bones. if they were the ones checking up on you after every battle they'd know so, but they wouldn't treat you with as much care. his only wish in the world is to keep you safe, which he's doing an awful job at as of yet. "i don't want you getting more hurt than you already are."

"as if it matters." you scoff, leaning towards him in an attempt to get him to back off. "i'll just give 'em a little taste of my titan and they'll run away like mice. it's easy, 'gumi. trust me—"

"life isn't a game!" he's furious.

"well mine is!" you're angry as well.

why don't you get it? why can't you just run away with him?

"i only have four years left! four years, megumi! i don't care if i die tomorrow or the day after that or the day after that. i'm going to either way. you don't have that problem. you don't understand."

without warning, his lips are on yours in his best attempt to stop you from spouting all of his fears and worries from your mouth. he doesn't want to hear it. he just wants to pretend none of it is happening, and you're going to be okay. you are going to be okay. he'll make sure of it.

it takes a moment for you to respond until your intertwined in a feverish kiss that sends his medical supplies clanging to the floor— but megumi doesn't care about order, all he cares about now is being as close to you as possible. he's dreamt of this moment for years. what you taste like...feel like...sound like. he knows you're his soulmate. what he doesn't know is why it's taken him so long to kiss you.

but before your connection can move forward and become something more, your touch is gone.

"i'm sorry, i can't do this." there are tears creeping from the corners of your beautiful eyes. "i—"

he calls out your name as your figure dashes out the door, wishing that he was able to confess. he wants to tell you he loves you so badly; except he doesn't have the bravery he needs. with four more years left, megumi has two things on his agenda.

1.) find a way to save you.

2.) tell you he's yours forever.

iv. what is love everlasting

he's finally become a monster like the rest of them.

from the first time he saw you, he told himself he'd be your savior. he made countless promises that he'd find a way for eldians and marleyans to live in peace, that he'd find a way to save you from this shitty war; only to be the very person to lock you in chains, awaiting imminent death as the next female titan will be born.

megumi wanted to be brave. he wanted to stop being such a coward, but some people just aren't capable of changing so much— and what a disappointment that is.

"hey, fushiguro?" when did you stop calling him by his first name? "can you keep a secret?"

he's not supposed to be civil with you. his orders are to chain you up, inject the child, and watch as she devours you; but you're his weakness. he can't resist you. "of course i can."

a smile graces your lips. it's not a smile of happiness or joy...it's one of anguish and pain. "i wish i ran away with you. i should've run away with you. even though we only had four years, we could've been happy."

why are you saying all of this?

now of all times?

you should've told him years ago! you should've let him know your secrets before he let them change him! before he distanced himself from you and became distracted with his work!

"...megumi..."

"yes?" he's desperate to hear you.

"...i don't want to die."

a thought crosses his mind. it's a scene in which two main characters beat all odds and escape the chains and prisons they've faced, running off into the sunset, never to be seen again. this scene has a happy ending, one where there's a small and intimate wedding with no witnesses except the meadow's flowers. he lifts your veil away from your eyes and murmurs sweet nothings as you kiss him to start off your forever. his heart wants that to be true. he wants that to be true. it's too late, though. you have no time left. your thirteen years is up. his thirteen years of knowing you is up. it's time to say goodbye.

"i can't save you." he's struggling to get his words out while maintaining his composure; and your heart breaks as his promise does as well. "i'm sorry."

he's a monster.

you hang your head, nodding and accepting your fate as he makes his way down the stairs. seeing you like that, knowing what your fate is, almost causes megumi to pass out from lightheadedness. he knows he shouldn't be worrying about himself. after all, you're the one who's about to die. he has a whole lifetime to continue living, and your lifetime was a mere twenty-six years.

gently, he takes the newest warriors hands and tells her what he's about to do. the blonde girl nods along to his words, trying her best to ignore your radiating hopelessness as she's about to become the next you; and megumi injects his needle into her neck.

he wants to look away so badly as she grows into a pure titan with eyes locked on your frail body, but he doesn't want it to end like this. there's gotta be something that he can do to help you. anything to save you from this fate; but to no avail, he's powerless. so powerless that the only thing he manages to do is mouth three seemingly meaningless words as he locks eyes with you.

"i love you."

⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⊹₊｡ reblogs are greatly appreciated! ˚₊⊹

#this fic is quite literally two years old so pls forgive the pacing #୧ ‧₊˚ 🎐 ⋅ my writing #megumi fushiguro #fushiguro megumi #megumi x reader #megumi x you #megumi x y/n #megumi fluff #megumi angst #megumi fushiguro x you #megumi fushiguro x reader #megumi fushiguro fluff #attack on titan #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk fluff #jjk angst #jjk ff #jjk fanfiction #megumi fanfiction #megumi fanfic #megumi ff #megumi hc #megumi hcs #jjk hc #jjk hcs #megumi fushiguro ff #i.e. thirteen years

[hd-junglebook]

Its Always Been You

Part 4 / Word Count 5816

Masterlist

Summary: And so, the trip to Michigan begins with a little surprise guest.

In the dim glow of his bedroom, Jack's world felt like it was crumbling around him. The shadows danced across the walls, mirroring the chaos within his mind.  Jack's hands trembled as he held the phone to his ear, his breathing uneven and his heart racing.

"Luke, I don't know what to do with myself," Jack's voice trembled, a mix of anguish and vulnerability. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears, and his free hand clenched into a tight fist.  

"I've acted like a complete fool all week. Y/n hates me. I'm feeling… I'm feeling things I never felt before for y/n, and I think I've finally lost my mind."

Luke's harsh tone cut through the silence, his confusion evident. "Jack, what the hell are you talking about?" There was a rustling sound on the other end of the line, as if Luke was sitting up in bed, suddenly alert.

Jack's pacing resumed, his frustration palpable. He ran his fingers through his disheveled hair, his footsteps heavy against the carpeted floor.

The room felt suffocating, the walls closing in on him as he struggled to contain his emotions.

"I told y/n I knew how she felt about me, and then I broke her heart. She left me all alone for three days. Jesus, I just saw her locking lips with some loser in the hallway. It's taking everything in me not to go out there and drag him outside."

"Jack…" Luke barely got out before he was interrupted again.

Before Luke could respond, Jack's voice rose again, defiant and emotional. "I'm not done." He halted his pacing, standing in front of his dresser where a picture of y/n and him sat.

It was from the night of his draft party, a snapshot of happier times. Jack's fingers traced the edges of the frame, his eyes fixated on y/n's smiling face. The photograph seemed to mock him, a cruel reminder of what he had thrown away.

He thought back to that night, his emotions, how he begged her to leave her life behind and move to New Jersey. The memory was vivid, the excitement and hope he felt then now replaced by a crushing sense of regret.

The scent of her perfume, the warmth of her hand in his, the sparkle in her eyes—it all came flooding back, intensifying the ache in his chest.

Rustling came through the speaker of Jack's phone. "I ruined us, Luke. I've ruined the best thing I've ever had." Jack's voice cracked, a single tear escaping and rolling down his cheek.

"Dude, it's almost 12am, and you're babbling about something everyone and their mom knew already. How long did you think you could fight your feelings?" Luke's tone softened, a mix of exasperation and concern.

"I don't know, Luke." Jack stayed still for a moment, his shoulders slumped in defeat. The door of their apartment closed, and he hung up on Luke when he heard footsteps approaching.

Jack perked up, holding his breath as he listened to them get closer. His heart raced, a glimmer of hope sparking in his chest.

Another door closed, leading Jack to swing open his door. Y/n had already closed her door, the click of her lock reverberating through the silent apartment.

Jack's hand hovered over her doorknob, his fingers trembling. He wanted to knock, to apologize, to pour his heart out, but fear and uncertainty held him back.

…

The sound of her alarm woke her from her restless sleep, the shrill beeping cutting through the stillness of the early morning. Her eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the darkness around her.

The room was bathed in a deep, melancholic blue, the shadows clinging to the corners and casting an air of despair. The curtains, a soft, sheer fabric, billowed gently in the breeze from the slightly open window, allowing a sliver of pale moonlight to penetrate the gloom.

"Here we go again," she mumbled groggily, her voice heavy with exhaustion and resignation. The words felt thick on her tongue.

She sat up in her bed, allowing the blanket to fall in a heap on her waist. The sheets, once a comforting embrace, now felt suffocating, tangled around her legs like the thoughts that consumed her mind.

y/n looked around the room with despair, her gaze lingering on the familiar objects that held countless memories—the framed photographs on the dresser, the stack of well-worn books on the nightstand, the discarded clothing strewn across the floor.

Y/n sighed again, the sound echoing in the emptiness of the room. She pushed the blanket off of herself fully, the cool air of the apartment sending a shiver down her spine.

Her steps were light as she dressed herself, opting for comfort over style for the plane ride back to Michigan. She pulled on a soft, oversized sweater, the fabric enveloping her like a comforting hug, and a pair of well-worn leggings that had seen better days.

As she moved about the room, gathering her belongings, the floorboards creaked beneath her feet, the sound amplified by the silence that hung heavy in the air. The scent of stale coffee and the lingering aroma of chocolate chip cookies wafted through the apartment.

Jack's door opened across from her room, his yawning loud against the stark silence of the world outside their little apartment. The sound made her flinch, her body tensing as she braced herself for the inevitable encounter.

She could hear his footsteps, the shuffling of his feet against the hardwood floor, and the rustling of his clothing as he moved about his room.

Y/n rolled her eyes, not ready to interact with Jack just yet. The thought of facing him, of seeing the guilt and regret in his eyes, made her stomach churn. She focused on the task at hand, pulling her suitcase up to the door, the wheels squeaking against the floor.

Her eyes landed on the corkboard that hung on the wall beside the door, the pictures of their innocent smiles and young faces causing her heart to break even more.

In one picture, they were grinning broadly, their arms wrapped around each other's waists as they posed in front of a sunset on the beach. In another, they were dressed in formal attire, attending a friend's wedding, their eyes sparkling with happiness and love.

Y/n's fingers traced the edges of the photographs, the glossy paper cool beneath her touch. A lump formed in her throat as she studied each image. She could feel the sting of tears behind her eyes, the emotions she had been trying so hard to suppress threatening to spill over.

She pulled the door open, rushing past the open bathroom where Jack stood in the mirror, his toothbrush dangling from his mouth and a look of surprise etched on his face.

Y/n moved with the speed of a cheetah, her feet pounding against the floor as she made a beeline for the safety of the kitchen.

Just as she thought she had escaped the awkwardness, the front door jingled, keys rattling against the metal knob like a mischievous poltergeist trying to gain entry.

Y/N stood frozen in place, her body rigid with shock as the door to the apartment swung open. The sudden intrusion had caught her completely off guard, and she felt as if she had been turned to stone, unable to move or speak.

As she watched, a tuft of blonde hair bounced into view, the golden locks reminding her of the fairy tale character Goldilocks. But this was no innocent child stumbling upon a bear's cottage; this was a full-grown woman barging into her home uninvited.

"Daphne? What the hell are you doing here?" Y/N managed to choke out, her voice rising in pitch with each word until it reached a near-shriek. The disbelief and anger dripped from her tongue like bitter honey, leaving a foul taste in her mouth.

Jack's girlfriend fully entered the apartment, dragging a garishly pink suitcase behind her. It was as if she had packed her entire life into that one piece of luggage, ready to move in and stake her claim.

The suitcase was so bright it hurt Y/N's eyes, a beacon of chaos signaling the impending doom that was about to unfold.

From the corner of her eye, Y/N saw Jack emerge from the bathroom, toothbrush still dangling from his mouth. White foam dripped down his chin, making him look like a rabid dog caught in the act.

His eyes widened as he took in the scene before him, darting back and forth between the two women as if trying to comprehend the gravity of the situation he had found himself in.

Daphne's gaze flicked between Jack and Y/N, her initial smile slowly fading as realization dawned on her face. "We planned this months ago, silly," she said, her voice dripping with false sweetness.

"Non-refundable ticket. We talked about this, Jack. It's only been three months; you can't get rid of me that easily."

She let out a laugh that sounded more like a witch's cackle, her eyes gleaming with a hint of mischief and something darker, more possessive. It was clear that she had no intention of leaving, no matter how unwelcome her presence might be.

Y/N felt her heart sink into her stomach, a wave of nausea washing over her as the reality of the situation hit her like a ton of bricks. Daphne was here, in their home, and it seemed that Jack had been keeping even more secrets than she had realized.

The air in the apartment suddenly felt thick and suffocating, the tension so palpable you could cut it with a knife. Y/N's mind raced with a million questions, a million accusations, but she couldn't seem to form the words.

All she could do was stand there, frozen in place, as the world she had built with Jack came crashing down around her like a house of cards.

Jack let out a heavy sigh, his hand rubbing the front of his scalp as if trying to erase the memory of ever agreeing to this disastrous plan. His face scrunched up like he had just bitten into a particularly sour lemon, the bitterness of the situation leaving a foul taste in his mouth.

He glanced sheepishly at Y/N, his eyes darting between the two women like a puppy who had been caught chewing on his owner's favorite pair of shoes.

"Can you give us a sec? Please?" he pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper, as if he were afraid that speaking any louder would cause the fragile peace to shatter.

Y/N scoffed, her arms crossing over her chest as she fixed Jack with a withering stare. "No, we have to leave soon, and if I don't have my coffee, I just might jump off the plane dealing with you both," she retorted, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Her eyebrows rose so high they nearly disappeared into her hairline, the thought of being trapped on a plane with these two making her seriously consider grabbing a parachute and taking her chances with gravity.

Jack's face reddened, his frustration bubbling to the surface. "We need privacy though!" he said, his voice tinged with annoyance.

He threw his hands up in the air, as if he were trying to physically push away the awkwardness that had settled over the room like a thick fog. "Could you give us some time?"

Y/N let out a humorless laugh, the sound harsh and grating in the tense silence of the apartment. "Oh, you need privacy? That's rich, coming from the guy who couldn't even bother to tell his best friend that his girlfriend was coming to visit."

She shook her head, her eyes narrowing as she fixed Jack with a look that could have melted steel. "You know what? Fine. You two lovebirds enjoy your little reunion. I'll be in my room, packing my bags and booking a one-way ticket to anywhere but here."

With that, she spun on her heel and stalked off towards her bedroom, her footsteps echoing like gunshots in the stillness of the apartment. She could feel Daphne's eyes boring into her back, could sense the smug satisfaction radiating off the other woman in waves.

But Y/N refused to let it get to her, refused to let the hurt and betrayal show on her face. She had always prided herself on being strong, on being able to handle whatever life threw her way. And she sure as hell wasn't going to let Jack or his girlfriend see her crumble.

As she reached her bedroom door, Y/N paused, her hand resting on the knob. For a moment, she was tempted to turn back, to march right up to Jack and demand an explanation.

But she knew that it would be pointless, knew that whatever he had to say would only make the pain worse.

So instead, she took a deep breath and stepped inside, slamming the door behind her with a resounding thud. And as she sank down onto her bed, her head in her hands and her heart in pieces, Y/N couldn't help but wonder how everything had gone so wrong, so fast.

…

Y/N walked back out into the living room, Daphne turned to her with an expression of exaggerated surprise. Her eyes were wide, and a cute smile was plastered on her face, the kind of smile that made you want to pinch her cheeks but also question the sincerity behind it.

"This is your best friend, right? She's a lot shorter than I remember," Daphne said, her voice dripping with false sweetness. It was clear that she was trying to get under Y/N's skin, to establish her dominance in the situation.

Y/N couldn't help but scoff, her eyes rolling so far back in her head that she nearly caught a glimpse of her own brain. "And you're the EX-girlfriend, right?" she retorted, putting extra emphasis on the "ex" part. Two could play at this game, and Y/N wasn't about to let Daphne win.

Jack let out a groan, his head falling back in frustration. "God, just my luck," he grumbled, his eyes rolling so hard they nearly got stuck in the back of his head.

He knew that he was in for a long and uncomfortable conversation with Daphne, and the thought of it made him want to crawl into a hole and never come out.

Y/N took a deep breath grabbing her coffee, the warm liquid providing a momentary comfort before made her way back out to the kitchen. Y/N grasped the cold metal handle, the chill sending a shiver down her spine.

"Let's go before I change my mind," she said, her voice flat and emotionless. She didn't want to give Jack or Daphne the satisfaction of seeing how much this situation was affecting her, didn't want to let them see the cracks in her carefully constructed façade.

…

The journey to the airport had been a tense affair, with Y/N pointedly ignoring Jack's attempts at conversation and Daphne chattering away obliviously in the background.

Y/N could feel Jack's eyes on her, his gaze heavy with unspoken apologies and explanations, but she refused to meet his eye, focusing instead on the passing scenery outside the car window.

they made their way through the bustling terminal, Jack tried once more to pull Y/N aside, his hand gently grasping her elbow. "Y/N, please, can we just talk about this?" he pleaded, his voice low and urgent.

Y/N yanked her arm away, her eyes flashing with barely contained anger. "There's nothing to talk about, Jack," she hissed, her voice sharp as a knife. "You made your choice, and now we all have to live with the consequences."

Jack's face fell, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "It's not like that, Y/N. If you would just let me explain..."

But Y/N cut him off with a bitter laugh, her head shaking in disbelief. "Explain what, Jack? How you don’t like me? How you play this stupid hot and cold game with me? No, I think I've heard enough explanations to last a lifetime."

She turned to walk away, but Jack's hand shot out once more, his fingers wrapping around her wrist. "Please, Y/N," he whispered, his eyes shining with unshed tears. "I never meant to hurt you. You have to believe that."

For a moment, Y/N wavered, her resolve crumbling in the face of Jack's obvious distress. But then she caught sight of Daphne waiting impatiently by the gate, her foot tapping, and her arms crossed, and the anger came rushing back in full force.

"I don't have to believe anything, Jack," she said, her voice cold and distant. "You made your bed, and now you have to lie in it. I just want to forget about all of this and move on with my life. So please, just leave me alone."

With that, she wrenched her arm from his grasp and strode towards the gate, her head held high and her heart shattered into a million pieces.

The seating arrangement on the plane felt like a cruel joke, a twisted game of fate that had placed Y/N in the middle of the very chaos she had been trying to escape.

She found herself sandwiched between Jack and Daphne, her body pressed against the cool glass of the window as if she could somehow merge with the clouds and drift away from the awkwardness that permeated the air.

Jack sat rigidly in the middle seat, his body a tense barrier between Y/N and Daphne. Y/N could feel the heat of his skin, could smell the familiar scent of his cologne, and it made her heart ache with a longing she couldn't quite suppress.

On Jack's other side, Daphne slept peacefully, her head lolling against his shoulder and her soft snores filling the space between them. She seemed blissfully unaware of the silent war raging within Y/N's mind, the turmoil that threatened to consume her from the inside out.

Y/N's foot tapped incessantly against the floor, a nervous habit that betrayed the inner chaos she was desperately trying to conceal. Each tap was like a metronome, counting down the seconds until she could escape the confines of the plane and the suffocating proximity to Jack.

She could feel his eyes on her once more, could sense the weight of his gaze boring into the side of her head. But she refused to look at him. Instead, she focused on the clouds outside the window, on the endless expanse of blue sky that stretched out before her.

Y/N was lost in thought, her mind a whirlwind of emotions and memories, when Jack's hand suddenly shot out, startling her back to reality. Before she could react, he had shoved a headphone into her ear, ignoring the sputtered questions and the look of indignation that flashed across her face.

His fingers brushed against her skin, sending a jolt of electricity through her body. It was a reminder of the connection they once shared, the easy intimacy that had defined their friendship for so many years. Y/N's breath caught in her throat, her heart racing as she tried to process the unexpected gesture.

As the familiar opening credits of her favorite episode of Game of Thrones filled her ear, Y/N's eyes widened in surprise. She glanced at Jack, searching his face for an explanation, but he steadfastly refused to meet her gaze.

His eyes remained fixed on the screen in front of him, as if the answers to all of life's questions could be found in the flickering images.

Y/N couldn't help but steal glances at Jack, her eyes tracing the contours of his face, the curve of his jaw, the way his lashes cast shadows on his cheeks.

Each glance was a silent question, a plea for him to acknowledge the unspoken words that hung between them. But Jack remained stoic, his attention unwavering, as if he had erected an impenetrable wall around himself.

Even as she tried to immerse herself in the show, Y/N couldn't shake the awareness of Jack's presence beside her. The warmth of his body seemed to seep into her skin, igniting a longing that she had tried so hard to suppress.

She could feel the rise and fall of his chest, could hear the soft whisper of his breath, and it made her heart ache with a bittersweet mixture of love and loss.

Beside her, Jack remained a silent presence, his body so close and yet so far away. Y/N couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking, what he was feeling.

…

Y/N stepped out of the airport, the crisp Michigan air filling her lungs and invigorating her senses. She took a deep breath, savoring the familiar scent of pine and freshly cut grass that always seemed to linger in the air.

The sun peeked through the scattered clouds, casting a warm glow on her surroundings and making the world seem a little brighter, a little more hopeful.

She scanned the crowd of people waiting outside the terminal, her eyes searching for a familiar face. And then, like a beacon in the chaos, she spotted him.

There, leaning against a sleek black car, was Luke. A grin spread across his face as he caught sight of her, his eyes crinkling at the corners in the way that had always made her heart skip a beat. "Y/N!" he called out, pushing himself off the car and striding towards her with open arms.

Without hesitation, Y/N dropped her bags and ran to meet him halfway. She threw her arms around his neck, feeling the solid warmth of his body as he wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting her off the ground in a spirited hug. For a moment, the world seemed to fall away, and all that mattered was the comfort and familiarity of Luke's embrace.

"I missed you so much," Y/N mumbled into his shoulder, her voice muffled by the fabric of his shirt. She breathed in the scent of him, a mixture of cologne and something uniquely Luke, and felt a wave of nostalgia wash over her.

Luke chuckled, the sound rumbling through his chest and vibrating against her own. "I missed you too, shorty. It's good to have you back."

He set her back down on the ground, but kept his arms around her, as if he was afraid she might disappear if he let go. Y/N couldn't help but smile up at him, feeling a sense of warmth and belonging that she hadn't felt in a long time.

Behind them, the sound of footsteps on the pavement broke the spell. Y/N turned to see Jack and Daphne approaching, their faces a mixture of exhaustion and something else, something harder to define. Jack's eyes met hers for a brief moment, a flash of emotion passing between them before he looked away, his jaw clenching.

Luke's arms tightened around Y/N, a silent show of support and protection. "Hey Jack, Daphne," he said, his voice carefully neutral. "Glad you could make it."

Daphne smiled, the expression not quite reaching her eyes. "Thanks for picking us up, Luke. It's been a long flight."

Y/N could feel the tension crackling in the air, the unspoken words and unresolved issues hanging between them like a thick fog. But for now, she pushed them aside, focusing instead on the feeling of Luke's arms around her and the promise of a few days away from the chaos of her life in New Jersey.

Jack moved forward, his arms open wide and a grin plastered on his face, Y/N felt a flicker of hesitation. There was something about his expression that seemed forced, as if he was trying too hard to appear casual and unaffected by the tension that hung thick in the air.

But before Jack could reach them, Luke's hand shot out, smacking the side of his head with a resounding thwack. The sound echoed through the parking lot, drawing the attention of a few curious onlookers. Jack stumbled back, a bewildered look on his face as he rubbed the spot where Luke's hand had made contact.

"Ow, what was that for?" Jack asked, his voice a mix of surprise and mock indignation. His brows furrowed as he looked at Luke, trying to decipher the reason behind the sudden attack. Y/N could see the gears turning in his head, the confusion and hurt flickering behind his eyes.

Luke lowered his voice, his tone stern yet laced with underlying concern. He leaned in closer to Jack, his eyes locked on his brother's, as if he was trying to convey a message that went beyond words.

"For being an idiot and for bringing her here. Did you forget about what you said on the phone?"

Y/N felt her heart skip a beat, her mind racing with the implications of Luke's words. What had Jack said on the phone? What secrets had he been keeping from her, even as he tried to bridge the gap between them?

Jack's face flushed with guilt, the color rising in his cheeks like a crimson tide. His eyes darted to Y/N, then back to Luke, a silent plea for understanding.

For a moment, no one spoke. Y/N could feel Daphne's eyes on her, could sense the other woman's curiosity and suspicion. But she refused to meet her gaze.

Finally, Luke broke the silence, his voice cutting through the tension like a knife. "Come on," Luke said, releasing Y/N and grabbing her bags. "Mom's waiting at home with lunch. She's been cooking up a storm all morning."

Y/N grinned, the thought of Luke's mother's cooking making her mouth water. "Lead the way," she said, falling into step beside him as they made their way to the car.

As they walked, Y/N could feel Jack's eyes on her back, could sense the weight of his gaze boring into her. But she refused to look back, refused to acknowledge the part of her that still longed for his touch, his presence, his love.

Instead, she focused on the warmth of Luke's hand in hers, on the promise of a few days of respite and healing. And as they drove away from the airport, the skyline of Detroit rising up in the distance, Y/N couldn't help but feel a flicker of hope igniting in her chest.

Maybe, just maybe, this trip would be the start of something new, a chance to leave behind the pain and heartache of the past and find a way forward, one step at a time. And with Luke by her side, and the love of her family to guide her, Y/N knew that anything was possible.

…

Lukes’s car pulled up to the familiar two-story house, Y/N felt a wave of nostalgia wash over her. The red brick facade, the white wooden porch, the sprawling oak tree in the front yard - every detail was exactly as she remembered.

She stepped out of the car, the warm breeze caressing her face and tousling her hair. The scent of freshly cut grass filled the air, a sweet perfume that brought back memories of lazy afternoons spent lounging in the sun and late-night conversations under the stars.

Y/N took a deep breath, letting the peace and tranquility of the moment settle over her like a comforting blanket. For the first time in days, she felt the knots of tension in her shoulders begin to loosen, the weight of her worries and fears slowly melting away.

Beside her, Jack and Daphne were unloading their bags from the trunk, their voices a low murmur against the backdrop of chirping birds and rustling leaves. Y/N hesitated for a moment, her eyes lingering on Jack's face, taking in the lines of stress and fatigue that creased his brow.

In that moment, she made a decision. She was tired of being angry, tired of holding onto the hurt and betrayal that had consumed her for so long. Life was too short to waste on grudges and resentment, too precious to let slip away in a haze of bitterness and regret.

With a determined set to her jaw, Y/N strode over to Jack, her steps purposeful and sure. He looked up as she approached, his eyes widening in surprise and a flicker of hope.

"Hey," she said, her voice soft but steady. "I just wanted to say... I'm sorry for the way I've been acting. I know things have been tough lately, but I don't want to keep dwelling on the past. You're my best friend, Jack, and that's never going to change."

Jack's face softened, his eyes shining with a mix of relief and gratitude. "Y/N, I..." he started, his voice thick with emotion. "I'm sorry too. For everything. I never meant to hurt you, and I know I have a lot to make up for. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to earn your trust again."

Y/N felt a lump form in her throat, the sincerity in Jack's words tugging at her heartstrings. She reached out and took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"I know," she said, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "let's just focus on enjoying this trip and being there for each other, okay?"

Jack nodded, his own smile breaking through the clouds of tension that had hung over them for so long. "Okay," he said, his voice filled with a tentative hope. "That sounds perfect."

Together, they made their way up the porch steps, their hands still intertwined. Y/N could feel the warmth of Jack's skin against her own.

"Welcome back, sweetheart," Ellen said, her voice warm and rich like honey. "We've missed you so much."

Y/N felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes. “I've missed you too," she said, her voice muffled against the older woman's shoulder. "It's so good to be home."

…

Luke led Daphne and Y/N up the stairs, their footsteps echoing on the hardwood, Jack seized the opportunity to pull his mother aside. His heart raced, palms sweaty as he glanced nervously between her and the staircase, his body practically vibrating with anxiety.

Ellen's brows furrowed, her maternal instincts kicking into high gear as she sensed her son's distress. She placed a gentle hand on his arm, her touch a silent invitation to share his troubles.

"Jack, honey, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice soft and filled with concern. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

Jack swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. He ran a shaky hand through his hair, his eyes darting around the room as if searching for an escape. But there was none to be found, and he knew that he owed his mother the truth.

With a heavy sigh, he guided her to the couch, his movements stiff and awkward. They sat down, the worn cushions sinking beneath their weight, and for a moment, neither of them spoke.

Finally, Jack broke the silence, his voice barely above a whisper. "Mom, I... I messed up. Y/N and I, we had a fight. A big one. And I don't know how to fix it."

Ellen's eyes widened, a flicker of disappointment crossing her face. But she remained silent, allowing her son to continue.

"I didn't tell her about Daphne, and she found out in the worst way possible. And now... now she can barely look at me. I don't know what to do, Mom. I can't lose her."

Jack's voice cracked, the tears he had been holding back for so long finally spilling over. He buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs.

Ellen's heart ached for her son, for the pain and regret that radiated off him in waves. She reached out and pulled him into a hug, her arms wrapping around him like a protective cocoon.

"Oh, Jack," she murmured, her voice filled with a mix of sympathy and gentle chastisement. "I know it's hard, but you have to be honest with the people you love. Secrets have a way of coming out, and they always hurt more in the end."

Jack nodded, his face still buried in his mother's shoulder. "I know," he said, his voice muffled by the fabric of her shirt.

"I just... I didn't want to hurt her. But I ended up doing exactly that." Ellen pulled back, her hands coming up to cup Jack's face. She looked him in the eye, her gaze filled with a wisdom born of years of love and experience.

"Do you remember the time that boy was bothering Y/N in school?" she asked, her voice soft and reminiscent. "You came home with a black eye and a split lip, but you were so proud of yourself for defending her."

Jack's lips twitched, a hint of a smile breaking through the tears. "Yeah, I remember. She was so upset, but I just wanted to make her feel safe."

Ellen nodded, her own smile mirroring her son's. "You brought her back here, to this very house. And you let her lay her head on your lap, and you caressed her hair until she fell asleep. Do you remember what I told you then?"

Jack's brow furrowed, his mind stretching back to that distant memory. "You said... you said that love is the most pure thing you can feel."

Ellen nodded, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips. "And I see it in you, Jack. When you look at her. You love her, don't you?"

Jack took a deep breath, his shoulders straightening his heart skipping a beat at his mother's words. He had always known, deep down, that his feelings for Y/N went beyond friendship. But to hear it spoken aloud, to have his deepest secret laid bare... it was both terrifying and exhilarating.

"I... I don't know what to say, Mom," he stammered, his cheeks flushing with a mix of embarrassment and longing. "Y/N and I, we're just friends. And besides, Daphne...” He trailed off, his eyes flickering towards the staircase where his ex-girlfriend had disappeared just moments before.

Ellen sighed "Jack, honey, the longer you wait, the harder it's going to be. Sooner or later, you're going to decide whether you want to be with her in that way or let her go and find love in someone else.”

Jack stood up, his heart lighter than it had been in days. He hugged his mother one last time, breathing in the comforting scent of her perfume. "You're right, Mom. I need to be honest with myself, and with Y/N. But... but I can't do it now. Not with Daphne here. It wouldn't be fair to anyone."

"Ellen patted his cheek, her touch a silent benediction. "I understand, sweetheart. But don't wait too long, okay?

…

Tag List <3

@favsrachz @jacktoria4ever @bunbunbl0gs @ivy-34 @rebelatbay @bxtchopolis

#angst #fluff #masterlist #new writers on tumblr #new fic #x reader #jack hughes fic #jack hughes imagine #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes smut #jack hughes #jh86 #njd #nj devils #nhl #new jersey #masterpost #luke hughes #new jersey devils #timo meier #nico hischier #jesper bratt #nico hischer x reader #jack hughes fanfiction #jack hughes x y/n #jack hughes x oc #jack hughes blurb #jack hughes insta edit #jack hughes x you #jack hughes x sister!reader

[daycourtofficial]

Falling in Love on the Fourth Floor - Part 7

Summary: Out of an act of desperation, you move in with a guy you kind of know who happens to have a really hot brother who lives next door.

Author’s note: eeeek I’ve had parts of this one in the drafts for AGES the middle section has been drafted for at least a month I swear and I’ve been sitting on it like 🧍‍♀️ waiting to share it. I think this is my favorite part so far (but not my fav overall 🥰)

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Masterlist)

Your day had been shit. Ever since that godsawful date Mor ambushed you with last night, you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering about Azriel and Nesta’s date. What they were doing, how things were going, if she was making him laugh.

Hell, you couldn’t stop thinking about their date while on your own date. The guy was good looking, and he wasn’t terrible, but there was nothing there between you two.

He also was very into cryptocurrency, a topic that quickly took over the conversation at dinner. A topic you did not encourage him to continue on. He somehow didn’t get that memo, insisting on walking you up towards the doors of your building when he was dropping you off, where you had made a lame excuse about going to bed early before ducking into your building.

You had followed the same path Azriel took only moments ago, continuing on to your own apartment. You open the door, finding a note on the fridge in Cassian’s messy scrawl.

Have fun.

He drew a winky face, and then several crude drawings on the post-it. The drawings made you groan, Cassian’s enthusiasm for your date further solidifying your nonexistent chance with his brother.

Of course Cassian would have Mor set you up after he found out about your little crush on his brother. You felt so stupid when you saw Nesta on their couch earlier today. You hardly spoke to Rhysand on the way to lab, your thoughts too flooded with how terribly you had read the whole situation.

Cassian probably told Mor all about your dumb crush and got her to fix you up tonight. Maybe Azriel had even mentioned your text to Cassian, asking him what to do about the annoying roommate who developed a crush on his brother.

Your chest hurts, but it was just a silly crush. You’ll get over it.

Eventually.

-

Azriel stood in the elevator, waiting for the doors to close as he looked at his phone, looking at the last message you had sent him Friday morning.

Wanna grab lunch tomorrow?

He hadn’t answered, his phone having been on silent all day to focus on finishing his work for the next week and the reception in the library not allowing messages to come through. He hadn’t seen the message until he woke up this morning, the timestamp seeming cruel.

Now he stares at it and wants to throw his phone. Missed opportunities, he supposes. But what would this lunch have looked like since you’re dating that dickhead from last night? Would you have had to reject him outright?

He can see your face contort in a smile as you tell him, “oh no, Az, I’m seeing someone.” Then you’d probably laugh about it with the dickhead.

He runs his hands down his face when he hears someone yelling, “hold the elevator please!” He juts out an arm on instinct, not noticing who it is. He sees you slip inside, the doors bumping against his arm, bringing him back to reality as he looks down at you.

Fuck.

A light scent of oranges fills the elevator, and he notes it’s likely from your shampoo. He pulls his arm from the door, allowing them to close, locking the two of you in the metal box.

You look up at him, eyes going wide, cheeks heating in embarrassment at the close proximity. You’re standing right in front of him, and you can smell his cologne, a scent of night-chilled air and cedar filling your nose. You take deep breaths, telling yourself that it’s okay, it was just a little crush.

On a very pretty, smart, and very kind guy.

Who smelled incredible.

You look down at your feet, unsure how to speak to him now that you knew he was dating Nesta. And not wanting to further embarrass yourself by flirting with him.

Gods, this was how you were going to die, you think, shuffling to lean against the rail. Azriel’s voice puts a halt to the spiraling of your thoughts.

“Nice date last night?” Azriel asks, trying not to let whatever he’s feeling bubble up. Your eyebrows shoot up, unaware of Azriel even knowing about your date.

Of course he knows, you think, Cassian probably told him he’d handle it.

“He spent the while night telling me about stocks and crypto and how he wants to be in Forbes 30 under 30,” you scoffed, “so no, it was not nice.”

The elevator starts moving, and his eyebrows shoot up. “So that wasn’t your boyfriend?”

You scoff, “hell no. Mor ambushed me yesterday. She told me to get dressed up and we’d go out and have a fun girl’s night, but when I showed up she texted me that she set me up instead.

“The worst part is Mor was so confident that she told Cassian about it, so he had stayed at her place last night to give me ‘privacy’. He even left crude drawings around the apartment to help the ‘atmosphere’.”

Azriel laughs as the elevator dings for the third floor. He feels his chest lighten, knowing you definitely weren’t seeing anyone. “Mor’s always been ambitious, hasn’t she?”

You laugh. “Maybe it was just a ploy for her to have sex with Cassian.”

You say it, but you know it’s not true. The real truth was they wanted to put you out there, help you get over the beautiful man standing next to you. They knew you didn’t have a shot, especially compared to Nesta. You’re brought back to reality, and decide to hurt yourself further.

“How was your date with Nesta?” You ground out, after a pause in your conversation. You needed to know so you can completely cut off your feelings for him. You needed him to pierce you with the final dagger.

His eyebrows arch up, and he looks at your expression.

Were you upset? You won’t meet his gaze, and you’re clenching your fists. Were you - jealous?

His mouth curls up at the thought, “uh it wasn’t a date. Nesta and I study together every Thursday night. We take a lot of the same classes. We did it last night instead because she was busy on Thursday.”

Your eyebrows raise in surprise, “so you’re not dating Nesta?”

He laughs, “absolutely not. No that’s an avenue I’d never go down. But there is some-“

His words die as you hear a screeching sound and the elevator stops completely, leaving you two stranded somewhere between the first and second floors.

“No - no, no, no.”

You start freaking out - elevators always gave you a bit of concern, their small dimensions making you feel cramped. You hit the button to open the door, jamming it with your finger. Realizing that it was fruitless, You pull out your phone only to remember that the elevator always has no service.

“Fuck,” you mumble, and your breaths start coming faster and faster, and you’re trying to remember your calming techniques, when you feel cold hands gently grab your cheeks.

“Hey, look at me.”

You look up, finding hazel eyes looking back at you. They’re etched with concern, not a trace of mockery in them.

“We’re okay. Breathe with me, can you do that?”

He grabs one of your hands, placing it on his chest so you can feel his breaths as they come in and out. Your eyes stay trained on his, not wanting to look away, wanting to get lost in the gold flecks you find there.

You start following the rhythm of his breaths, but he keeps talking to you in a soothing tone. You’re too focused on breathing to register what he’s saying, but you do register the soothing tone he’s speaking to you in. You could get lost in his voice, its deep timbre a melody in your ears.

Eventually you come back down enough to focus on what he’s saying and he’s telling you about his night - everything he did yesterday.

“Rhys texted me to get some trash bags on my way in, which is where I was coming from when I pulled up and found you with crypto douche.”

You smile, your first real reaction to his words since the elevator stopped.

“There she is,” he says, his finger tapping your cheek, “wanna tell me more about crypto douche?”

“He wants to be a landlord.”

Azriel snorts, “of course he does.”

“I didn’t even want to go on this date,” your eyes stay locked with his, the golden flecks calming you down. “But Mor has been begging me to go out with this guy for ages, and then she finally decided to ambush me by forcing it on me.”

“You know you can tell Mor “no”. It’s a complete sentence.”

“I know,” you sigh, “but she loves playing matchmaker, even though she’s awful at it. Usually once every other month I let her set me up, but she was just throwing a tantrum I wouldn’t let her set me up this time once I figured out the rouse.”

He doesn’t let himself linger on the fact that you haven’t let her set you up since meeting him. Coincidence, maybe. “Have any of them been successful?”

You blow out a breath, “uh, no. Usually I stay for an hour then leave. None of them have ever gotten a second date.” You pause, thinking. “In the words of the great philosopher of our time, “I’m a pathological people pleaser,” you chuckle.

“And who said that?”

“…. Taylor Swift.”

He looks at you, a chuckle on his breath, such tenderness in his gaze it shocks you a bit. “You should stand up for yourself more.”

“I’m… not really sure how. It’s kind of new to me.”

You look at your feet, but he taps your chin so you’ll look at him again. “I stood up to my parents, and it was the scariest thing I’ve ever done.”

You had tiptoed around the topic since your admission to Cassian the day you moved in, the wound still too raw to discuss with anyone other than Feyre. Mor knew some of the details, but not the whole story. You’re sure Rhys and Az knew that something happened with your parents, but you never let them know too much about it.

They didn’t know that your parents had told you that you became everything they had tried to avoid. That, despite everything they did for you, you didn’t turn out right.

You hadn’t told Mor because you knew she would have burnt down their house with them in it.

“It was scary, moving here with a guy I hardly knew.” His grip on you tightens slightly, and he’s hanging onto every word you say.

“But I don’t regret it. Not even when Cassian wakes me up at 6 AM with his singing.”

He chuckles, and he stills as you look into his eyes, your voice clear and strong.

“I don’t… I don’t regret any of it. I don’t regret meeting you.”

His hands are still cupped on your face, his face mere inches from your own. Your confession hangs in the air as you two look at each other, and he leans closer, pressing his forehead to yours.

Your breathing hitches, but not because you’re stuck.

He opens his mouth to reply, but the elevator comes back to life, moving downwards again. It startles both of you into jumping away from each other, and you clear your throat.

“Where are- where are you going?” You ask, gesturing towards his helmet.

“Oh, uh Cassian forgot his lunch and doesn’t have time to grab anything between clients. I was going to bring him something.”

The air is lighter between you two, and Azriel feels like he can breathe you in again. The fog of confusion has lifted between you two, leaving you to be seen clearly by him.

“Do you want to get lunch?”

He echos your previous text message to him, and you nod.

“Yeah I’d love that.”

You stroll through the lobby, putting as much distance between the falter elevator and yourselves. Once you make it to the parking lot, Azriel places his spare helmet on your head, tapping the top of it lightly affectionately.

You zip your jacket up as Azriel gets on the bike first, his thighs straddling the seat. He holds the bike steady, allowing you to place your hands on his shoulders for balance, letting go of your fears as you swing your leg around to straddle the bike behind him. Your body leans against his, wrapping around him, holding onto him.

You place your head on his back, your fingers clutching onto his jacket. It feels new, electricity crackling through every inch of you that is in contact with him, despite the layers and helmets that separate you.

He chuckles at the gasp you let out when you two start moving, how your hands hold onto his jacket a little tighter than before.

He pulls a hand away to place it gently on one of the hands you have clutched to his jacket, squeezing three times before moving his hand back.

#acotar fanfiction #azriel x reader #azriel #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #azriel fluff #acotar writing #azriel x y/n

[em-dash-press]

How to Survive the Editing Process

Writing a first draft takes so much of your time and energy. When you finish something, celebrate your accomplishment! It’s proof of your creativity and hard work.

If you want people to read your work, then it’s time to edit.

Editing can seem scary. Daunting. Confusing.

Use these tips to get started.

1. Take a Break from Your Work

It’s so important to let your brain reset after finishing any story. Close your draft and spend the next few days or weeks doing other hobbies. When you feel ready to return with a newly energized, distanced perspective, you’ll get your best editing work done.

2. Start With Developmental Editing

Writers often think that they have to start editing line by line, looking for grammar and spelling issues. While you’re free to do that, you’re likely going to add and remove plenty of content before your final draft is done. 

Instead, start with developmental editing. Read through your work and take notes about how the larger plot points are working or not working. Does each chapter move your characters through each point on your plot outline or your visualized storyline?

This step may involve adding new scenes or removing others. It can also mean reworking old scenes so they’re less wordy, more descriptive, more actionable, or whatever you feel like is missing.

Take notes about plot holes too. You don’t have to fix them on your first read-through, but note where they’re happening and why they’re holes. You can return in your second read-through to address them.

You can also break your developmental editing into questions, like:

What is my story’s theme and does each chapter support that theme?

What does every character want and do they achieve that? Why or why not?

What motivates each character? Do they retain that motivation or develop a new one to better serve the plot? (Sometimes writers forget about initial character motivations while getting lost in the writing process. This is the time to revisit that!)

Do you have a beginning, an inciting incident, building through the middle, and payoff at the end? (You can have much more than these, but these are very basic plot mechanics to look for.)

3. Save and Start a Second Draft

After reading through your manuscript and noting the things above, create a copy for your second draft and start working on your notes. It’s good to have a separate second copy in case you want to include something from the original draft later on or just want to compare where you story started/how it ended up.

Again, you’re not supposed to worry about line work at this point. Focus on bigger-picture story issues like plot mechanics, how scenes work/don’t work, plot holes, and your theme(s).

Reminder: there’s no timeline for getting these steps done. Work when you have the energy and take breaks when you don’t. Your manuscript will stay right where you save it.

4. Reread Your Work

When you’ve worked through your list of notes, make a copy of your manuscript and start Round 3. Reread your story and start a new list of bigger-picture notes as needed. This time, the list should be shorter or include new notes that you didn’t catch before. They may also include notes for new scenes you just added.

The point of this reread is to make sure that your manuscript still works. Your plot shouldn’t have any holes, it should flow smoothly, and it should be engaging. 

Here’s a key concern for many writers: how do you edit your story without getting away from your original intentions?

Keep your eyes locked on why you write your original draft. If you make edits/scene removals or additions with that purpose or theme in mind, your story will stay on track. It may eventually look completely different than what you originally wrote (if that’s your editing journey), but the heart of it will remain the same.

Try posting your story’s purpose or theme on a sticky note attached to your monitor.

You could also write the theme in your document’s header so it appears on every page.

5. Save and Start a Fourth Draft

Yes, it’s time for another new copy that’s your official fourth draft.

Remember—you can still walk away and return to your work later! Burnout won’t result in the story you’ve been working so hard to create. Get some sleep, see some friends, enjoy your other hobbies. You’ll come back ready to go.

The fourth draft is another chance to read through your work and ensure that everything works. Your chapters should get your characters closer to your theme/purpose with each page. The scenes should flow, not repeat information, and keep you engaged.

When you have a small list of edits or none at all, it’s time to start line work.

The spell check feature of any word processing software is a lifesaver, but it’s also not perfect. You’re going to have sentence structures that spell check deems incorrect when it actually works for your writing style or character. You’ll have fake names you made up that spell check wants to change.

If you use spell check, proceed slowly. Read every sentence with a flagged issue to make sure it’s a good or bad suggestion.

You can double your line work by combing through it by yourself. Print your story and grab a highlighter or use the highlight feature on your computer. Note linework issues that you can fix with a quick edit when you get a chance, like:

Misspellings

Missing punctuation

Wrong punctuation marks

Missing words

Inconsistent capitalization or spelling

Formatting issues (spelling out numbers vs using numerals, etc.)

Using the wrong tense in some paragraphs or chapters

Inserting indents as needed

Extra spaces between paragraphs

6. Send Your Work to Beta Readers

Repeat the saving, making a copy, and editing as many times as you want. When you feel like you’ve got your strongest draft yet, you can send it to beta readers.

How you define beta readers depends on your specific situation. You may have a few writing friends who know the craft well and will read your work with a professional eye. You might have a family member or best friend who doesn’t know about the craft of writing but always reads your work.

There are also places like Reddit threads and Facebook groups where people volunteer as beta readers.

The primary reason to get fresh eyes on your work is to get notes from someone who hasn’t been working on the content for months or years. 

Their advice might not always be usable, but it’s still an important part of editing. Your beta reader might suggest points where they lost interest because your pacing slows down or point out places where you described your protagonist as having long hair when they have short hair during the rest of the story.

You’ll know which suggestions are actionable and which aren’t based on who’s speaking and how it resonates with your story’s purpose. You’ll probably get better advice from other writers who have been through editing before, but that doesn’t mean their advice will always be correct.

Check in with your story’s purpose or theme before taking action on a beta reader’s notes.

When Should You Stop Editing?

One of the final battles during your editing experience will be recognizing when you can stop working on your manuscript.

There will always be moments where you could think of a new scene or a new way to rewrite a scene. That doesn’t mean you have to!

Ask yourself these questions to finish your editing when your story is strongest:

Question 1: Have I Worked Through the Most Essential Plot Mechanics?

A finished manuscript doesn’t need more structural work. But structural, I mean that you’ll be at peace because your manuscript:

Doesn’t have any plot holes

Addresses your theme/message from beginning to end

Showcases each character’s growth through plot developments

Has natural dialogue

Has introduced and resolved conflicts (with the exception of conflicts that will continue in a sequel or series)

Has no known typos or grammar issues

Question 2: Are My Edits Improvements or Are They Inconsequential?

You could spend a lifetime swapping character names, adjusting your world map, or revising how you describe locations. You might like your edits better, but they aren’t vital to your story’s plot or character development. If there’s no substantial improvement with your edits, you’re likely done with your manuscript.

-----

Editing can be tricky at first, but using steps like these will help you whack through the densest parts of the work. Take your time, give yourself space to rest, and you’ll create the story you’ve been working so hard to finish!

#editing #editing tips #editing advice #writeblr #writers of tumblr #writing tips #writing advice

[milaisreading]

How about this one. a scenario where the manager goes out with her older step-brother on a siblings date. But the bllk 11 boys thought she was having a boyfriend and such and chaos start going everywhere:D? Love your writings btw!!💕

Author: I had this sitting in my drafts for abt 4 days, since smn else requested it too!! Hope u like it and thank you for the request 🩷

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. Requests are open

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

"Nagi, put down the knife." Rin warned as his eyebrow twitched. The albino groaned and put the item on the table. Rin rolled his eyes and continued glaring at the scene in front of him, until he noticed something from the corner of his eyes.

"Reo, who are you texting?" The billionaire heir looked up from his phone and huffed.

"I am writing the others what had happened. They are on their way here."

"They are what? Are you insane?" Isagi asked, finally wrestling a fork out of Nagi's hands.

"Did you seriously plan on stabbing the guy's eyes out with that thing?" Chigiri asked, never once looking away from the horrific scene in front of them.

What was going on? Why were these 5 boys.... agitated to say the least? And why was Nagi asking people, in the restaurant, to give him their knives?

"I am sorry about him." Reo sighed, flushing from the embarrassment and pulled Nagi away from the guests.

"Why are they so close?" Chigiri bit on his napkin, glaring at the older looking boy sitting across from (Y/n). The 5 boys felt their hearts get pierced as the saw (Y/n) laughed at something the older looking boy said.

"What did he say?" Rin muttered, eyes narrowing.

"I don't know.... but they do look very cozy with how close they are. Do you think the dude is her... boyfriend?" Isagi said, gagging at the last word.

"No no no, absolutely not. He looks too old for her." Reo said, frowning as they observed them from their table. Luckily for them, they were far away from (Y/n)'s table for her to notice them... but that also meant they couldn't hear anything.

"Do you think (Y/n) is into older looking guys? What a hassle, now I have to grow a beard." Nagi groaned.

"Please don't, unless you want to scare off everyone... but I am curious as to what that dude is to (Y/n)." Rin said.

"We are here."

"Where is the asshole who took my manager away?"

"Our manager, Otoya."

The five looked up and saw Hiori, Karasu and Otoya approach their table, all three seething in anger.

"They are over there."Chigiri said, glaring at the table.

"That lame guy? I should feel insulted that she picked him over me."  Otoya blinked in disbelief as Hiori stuck his tongue out.

"He looks sleazy. How did (Y/n) fall for that guy?"

"There is literally 0 significance about him... what does he have that I don't?" Karasu wondered, nt believing she would settle for someone like him.

"Is the rest coming?" Chigiri questioned.

"Barou, Aryu, Bachira Tokimitsu, and Yukimiya said they are on their way. Kurona, Gagamaru, Niko, and Kunigami sadly can't make it. So I am keeping them updated on everything." Reo said simply.

"Eh." Isagi gasped, causing the rest to look at him in an alarmed manner.

"What?" Otoya asked, as the boy pointed at the table. The rest looked at the table, and their eyes either narrowed or widened in shock as they watched the unknown man pat their manager on the head. Karasu and Nagi kept quiet, not believing their eyes, meanwhile Chigiri and Rin tried to walk over to them, and save (Y/n) from the unknown man, but got held back by Isagi and Reo.

"What now? Can I kill him now?" Otoya asked, earning a nod from Rin.

"No... no listen. We can't cause a scene now, (Y/n) will be disappointed in us if we do." Reo started.

"Then what are we supposed to do? We can't let that guy steal (Y/n)." Nagi argued, earning a nod from Karasu.

"Besides, (Y/n) will-"

"She is leaving. They are both leaving." Isagi and Chigiri said, watching the duo keenly as the guy paid for the food and left the restaurant.

"Well, let's follow them." Rin told the group, earning a nod in agreement.

"At least he wasn't complete trash to let her pay for her own food." Otoya rolled his eyes, quickly following after the duo.

'I could have bought her better food.' Reo growled, texting the rest what was going on.

"Such a loser. An insect and nobody compared to me." Rin muttered in anger.

"I really want to kick a football into that ugly face." Nagi thought, an unfamiliar sense of anger taking over his body. Karasu rolled his eyes, just as mad as Nagi.

"I might assist you there."

"Isagi, do you really think (Y/n) likes that guy? They were pretty close." Chigiri said in worry, the blue-eyed ace giving his friend an unsure smile.

"No... I believe they are just close friends... there is no way (Y/n) will replace us with him." Isagi said, dread filling up his body.

Shortly after they started following the duo, the group of guys had walked into Bachira, Barou, and Yukimiya, who were less than pleased with the sight of (Y/n) laughing at something the taller said.

'I will crush him! I should be the only one to make her laugh! Not that loser.' Bachira clenched his fists as they followed them through Shibuya, trying to hold himself back from punching the guy.

'What does she even see in him? He can't even dress properly nor does he have the looks worthy of (Y/n)'s attention.' Yukimiya rolled his eyes, the familiar feeling of jealousy hitting him again.

"He probably smells like dogs." Otoya grumbled.

"And has the personality of a brick."

"And the looks of a poorly done pavement." Karasu and Chigiri added in.

"Barou, please don't cause a scene." Isagi begged quietly as the taller was held back by Reo and Nagi. Barou himself was the calmest among the group, but he was losing it rather quickly after they witnessed the unknown guy remove something from her hair.

'That bastard will eat dirt soon.' Barou's glare was scaring every unsuspecting person by now. But oddly enough, Rin was the calmest. His reason? Simple, it's because in his mind, nobody can beat him. He was a captain, after all!

'What sort of fashion nonsense does he have?! Those pants with that shirt?!' Aryu thought, watching as (Y/n) and the guy were looking through some clothes at the mall. (Y/n) was showing the guy a cute, pink top, very glamorous in Aryu's opinion, and the boy was smiling proudly at her taste. But the sweet moment of Aryu swooning over her was interrupted by the guy showing her some jeans she could pair it with. Aryu chocked on his spit as he saw it.

'He will ruin her outfit!! That should be me buying clothes with her!!'

Tokimitsu was meanwhile pouting as he was watching the duo. He didn't like how close they looked. He also didn't like how much that guy was more than him. The guy was way more talkative and more brave to say things that were on his mind.

'I can't even compare to him...' Tokimitsu thought as he was told by Aryu to go meet up with the rest, since they were waiting for the two at the food court.

Rin wasn't much worried about the guy taking hi-their manager away, after all, relationships change and Rin doesn't believe this guy will be able to hold (Y/n)'s attention for too long. Sure, he was jealous that he wasn't the one sitting across from her right now, talking and laughing over nonsense. But worried? No. Currently, Rin, Isagi, and Reo were sitting near the table (Y/n) was sat at, and kept an eye on the guy, just in case. The conversations were bland, to the trio, and nothing indicated that they were a couple.

"Maybe they are just close friends?" Reo suggested, looking at Isagi.

"Probably. We may have jumped to conclusions too fast." Isagi laughed nervously

"You did, lukewarms." Rin added in, earning glares from the two.

"You were jealous too." They said in unison.

"I remember that! That was while you played basketball." The three stopped talking and paid close attention to what (Y/n) was saying. The trio sat a few tables away, but were able to make out some things they were talking about.

"Ahh~ you remember that? It was so embarrassing, especially after we didn't qualify for the nationals." The guy chuckled.

'Loser.' Rin and Reo thought, while Isagi flinched a little. Remembering how he felt after Ichinan lost.

"Win, lose who cares? I really admired how well you took the loss and acted all gracefully over it during the interview. A real captain." At the last sentence, Rin stiffened and his heartbeat quicken. She never complimented anyone om their captain skill, other than him!!

'What was that?!' He thought, eyes narrowing.

"Uhm... Rin?" Isagi muttered, sharing a few worried glances with Reo.

"Earth to Rin?" The billionaire heir said, waving his hand in front of his eyes.

"You think so? I think I was a decent captain." The guy added in.

"You were the best."

That last part caused Rin to finally snap and he got out of his chair, he was ready to murder now.

"Who does that piece of trash think he is?" He muttered, sending warning glares at Reo and Isagi, who were trying to calm him down.

Without another word, the younger Itoshi walked up to the table, clearing his throat to get their attention.

"Huh?" The guy muttered, looking at Rin in confusion.

"Rin? What a surprise! I didn't take you for a mall guy." (Y/n) smiled, unaware what was going on the whole time. She looked past the taller boy, seeing Reo and Isagi approach them.

"And you are here with Isagi and Reo? An unlikely combination." She joked a little, causing the 3 to relax a little as she laughed.

"We were just walking around, and wanted to say hi. It's all." Isagi said, wearing his usual smile.

"Yeah, it was a surprise seeing you here, too." Reo added in. The trio talked, ignoring the glares Rin was sending the older guy, who grew more and more unnerved at the stare.

"And you are here with..." Isagi started, sending a suspicious look towards the guy.

"Oh! This is my older brother, (B/n) (L/n)." (Y/n) answered, pointing at the older boy excitedly.

The trio felt their glares soften and they blinked a few times.

"Brother?!" Reo exclaimed.

"Is there an issue?" (B/n) wondered, suspicious of the trio.

"N-not at all! It's just-"

"We couldn't tell you two were siblings." Rin interrupted Isagi rather bluntly. (Y/n) laughed at that as her brother rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, we are half siblings."

"We get that a lot, don't worry, Isagi." She said, seeing the embarrassed look on his face.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, I am Reo Mikage." The purple-haired boy said kindly, trying hard to not make a bad impression on him.

"Isagi Yoichi, it's nice to meet you." The blue-eyed boy added in.

"Itoshi Rin." The now embarrassed Itoshi said, looking away with a huff.

'He is like a child.' Reo and Isagi facepalmed.

"So this is the team..." The older (L/n) muttered, eyeing the trio up and down, shrugging his shoulders right after. The three held their breaths, wondering what he meant by all of that.

"Aha! Told you they are great!"

"You... you talked about us?" Reo asked in shock.

"Constantly." The brother rolled his eyes, earning a pout from (Y/n).

"I am impressed, slightly." He added in monotonously.

"That's like the nicest thing you said about any of my friends." (Y/n) gasped. Hearing that, the three felt their spirits perk up a little. There was still hope for them!

"Do you guys want to sit and eat with us?" She asked, earning a no from Reo.

"Sorry, we have to...uhm..."

"We need to buy something and quickly go home! Sorry (Y/n), maybe next time!" Isagi quickly added in. The trio quickly after walked away, leaving the siblings a little confused.

"They are weird." (B/n) said.

"But a good kind of weird!" She defended them in return.

#bllk #blue lock anime #blue lock manga #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #isagi yoichi #manager reader #blue lock requests #reo mikage #chigiri hyoma #itoshi rin #yukimiya kenyu #barou shouei #aryu jyubei #tokimitsu aoshi #karasu tabito #otoya eita #nagi seishiro

[salaciousdoll]

Walk Away- Mikey Sano

━━ ༉⁩༊ Pairings : Manjirou Sano x Fem!reader, Rindou Haitani x Fem!reader

━━ ༉⁩༊ Encapsulation : Manjirou was tired of you and did the only thing he could think of, but was it worth the pain in the end?

━━ ༉⁩༊ Warnings : Angst, heavy angst, no comfort( for Mikey), cheating implied, vi0lence, small t0rture descriptions( not on reader), oc names Yasire’, chubby reader, black reader, overall just angst and hurt, everyone in Bonten doesn’t like you except Rindou and maybe Ran, Rindou is a sweetheart in this, Rindou has feelings for you, Divorce talk/ settlement

━━ ༉⁩༊ Word Count : 3.6K

( This is an old ass draft and I wanted to post it to clear out my drafts so enjoy the heartbreak 😉)

You loved Manjiro Sano so much that you put aside anything and came to his aid, but would he do the same? Yes and No.

You were laying down on the bed waiting for your husband. You honestly were getting worried because it’s 4 am and he never is out no later than 2 am. He did call you and say that he was heading to the club with his men and that you should get some sleep, but you couldn’t help but to worry about him.

You were watching the 4am news when suddenly you saw something you wished you didn’t see, “ Breaking news, there was a violent shooting around 2 am this morning, leaving multiple deaths and 2 wounded heavily, sources says this is the effect of the gang violence between Bonten crime organization and CG crime organizat-”, The news reporter says with visuals of one of the nightclubs Bonten owns. It was a terrifying sight to see and you had to call Manjiro.

Meanwhile in the Bonten headquarters, Mikey was getting his wounds fixed while Kakucho was beside him doing the same thing. This was the worst hit they’ve gotten and they just knew someone was a traitor, and Ran was the first to point it out, it’s usually Sanzu. Bonten was secured and locked with the safety of their own club, so why would their enemy suddenly attack them when they didn’t even make it known they were showing up to the club they least visit.

Mikey was on the phone with Yasire’, his ex- wife. She was the one he truly cared and loved this entire time. Kakucho and the others even liked her more than you because she actually helped him, meanwhile to them it felt like you were a show off type of woman. They knew he needed someone like Yasire’ and not you.

“ Are you okay, Manjiro? Do you want me to come over there?”, Yasire’ says into the phone, already getting her keys.

Mikey almost smiled at that and was about to answer when suddenly your name popped up and he just let it ring as the doctor was patching up his stomach. He felt sick of you and he needed you to get out of his mind and life because you were draining him and he didn’t even have a reason for why you were draining him.

“ Mikey?”, Yasire’ asks, wondering why he suddenly showed the expression of irritation. He smiled again once he saw her face and voice on the other side of the FaceTime call, “ Huh, baby? Right, what were we talking about?”

Sanzu happily answered for him, “ Invite her over, I want some of her snacks out of her bag, the other one doesn’t carry good snacks like Yasire’ does.”, Sanzu says, earning a heavy sigh from Rindou.

Rindou was the only one who thought that you didn’t deserve this. He honestly thought you were great for Mikey. Mikey always smiles and laughs with you, but then again he does that with Yasire’ too. Only with you his smile and laugh was fake, anyone could see that but you, it seems. Rindou also thought you had a funny and beautiful personality matching your pretty ass face and body doesn’t matter what size you are either, they all needed a you in their lives, Mikey just didn’t cherish what he has.

Mikey chuckled, actually chuckled before speaking, “ Come over, we missed you.”

Yasire’ smiled before saying okay and hanging up the phone. She knew about you and still didn’t care because why would she, after all you took Mikey from her and now she took him back.

Mikey smiled at the phone and couldn’t wait for Yasire’ to come. Oh, how much he loves her. God, he wished he would choose differently.

You, on the other hand, was on your way to Bonten headquarters after getting a text from Rindou saying that they’re all okay and that Mikey’s fine and was here at the HQ. You originally texted all of them and the others ignored you or blocked you, meanwhile he didn’t.

You honestly didn’t know why Mikey didn’t answer his phone. You suddenly remembered that he doesn’t kiss you goodbye or say that he wants to take you out or make love to you like he always did for these past few months.

Maybe he was cheating? No. No. No. he’s hurt right now and you’re thinking about that, what was your problem? Is this why he hasn’t been really speaking to you, have you become insecure about this relationship with him.

You scratched the thoughts out your head and continued driving to their headquarters.

Yasire’ was already there and was now hugging everyone, “ Oh, I missed you all, how did you all get caught like this in the first place, you look like hell.”

Ran smiled while pouring himself a drink, “ That's because we were fighting for our lives cherry head, why red anyways?”

Yasire’ was about to answer when she got pulled on Mikey’s lap making him grunt in the process because of his wounds, “ Mikey! Anyways, because I wanted to try a new approach, you like it, slick back?”

Everyone laughed at her corny joke while Ran held up his glass, “ That's up for your husband to decide, isn’t that right Mikey?”

Mikey huffed before nodding, “ Mhmm, you look so damn good, I wish I could see you everyday and everynight, instead I’m stuck with her.” The way Mikey said her was supposed to offend you , but the others felt the venom from that word and felt like he was talking to them.

Mochi chuckled, “ Damn, Mikey, you really don’t like y/n, huh?”

Mikey chuckled a little before rubbing a hand over his face, “ You have no idea, she adds on to my stress and doesn't even know it. She constantly worries and nags about me like shut the hell up and just fuck me. Shit! She can’t even do that right.”

The men and the woman laughed at his response. Yasire’ spoke up, “ Why don’t you just drop the bitch, if she can’t even satisfy you why are you even with her?”

Mikey kissed Yasire’ on her lips a few times before answering, “ Why can’t I be with you? I never stopped loving you and hated that she was a temptation I couldn’t resist, now I’m trapped with the most boring and weakest person ever. Believe me, I gave the bitch a hint but she doesn’t even see it.”

Everyone laughed until suddenly they stopped when Rindou got up and paused from where he was standing looking at someone with full remorse for something he didn’t even do. Everyone looked from where he was looking and gasped when they saw you with the most tired expression they saw on your face.

You didn’t even want to cry in front of all of them because you knew they were faking with you since the night of that party. He never even holds you like that so you just silently stared at every last one of them.

Yasire’ and Mikey were too busy gripping and kissing each other to not realize everyone got quiet. They didn’t notice until Takeomi spoke up, “ Why are you here?”

You cleared your throat and walked in further with your hairstyle and clothes slightly wet from the rain outside, “ I wanted to see if you all were alright, looks like you all are, nice to see you Yasire’. I’ll be getting my clothes out of your room Mikey.”

“ Oh, don’t bother, I threw them out, I paid for them didn’t I? So you could kindly walk back out of here. Don’t make this harder than it has to be y/n.”, Mikey says with his usual threatening and dark voice.

You stepped back before taking one last look around the living room and at everyone before holding eye contact with the sympathetic eyes of Rindou. You smiled at him letting him know you forgive him and it was not his fault.

“ Okay.”, You say before turning back and heading out the door and past security. Meanwhile, the men and the woman were cheering loudly as you heard Mikey’s last words, “ Don’t let that woman anywhere near this place again, understand? If she comes back, kill her.”

You felt it, you felt the salty tears coming out your eyes as you got in and started the car. You tried to get your tears out of your eyes before you started driving, so you sat there. Just like that, Yasire’ won after all these years. She never liked you since you met Mikey and supposedly stole him from her when in reality, they were broken up. You were neutral but her—she hated you.

You seen the glimpse of admiration in Mikey’s eyes when he looked at her in contrast to his dull black eyes when he looked at you. You thought you were helping him since he was back to eating like the old Mikey and his eyebags weren’t as heavy as they were. Turns out you weren’t the one helping at all, it was Yasire’ all along.

You pulled out the driveway when suddenly Rindou came out and everyone else came out after him and started waving at you in mockery. Meanwhile, he wanted to comfort you. He was closer to you than he was to Yasire’, he was going to call you later for sure.

You hurried and pulled off with anger, sadness, and resentment filled in your heart and tears streaming down your face. You tried to wipe them as you moved down the road. You stopped at a red light and collected your tears before an expensive car rode past since it was turning at the other light, firing bullets aimed at your car. They’ve been watching you since you came out of Bonten’s HQ. They didn’t know who it was in the car because of the tinted windows, all they wanted was revenge.

Three bullets hit you, one in your arm. Another in your side and another one in your shoulder. You thought this car was bulletproof since Mikey said it was, turned out he lied about that but why? Did he want you dead that bad? Damn!

The car pulled off and someone who was walking nearby called an ambulance for you. You felt like this was your last day on earth. What a shitty way to leave this world huh? When you meet with the afterlife, you gotta ask them why they chose this death for you.

You started thinking about your family and friends.

“ Y/n would you help me with this”, your mother says while cooking in the kitchen for your birthday. You almost smacked your lips because you honestly hated cooking with her, she’s too strict in the kitchen.

“ Get that paprika out of the cabinet and put it on this meat, when you put it on the meat, sprinkle just a good amount, not too much, not too little now.”, You mother says as you did what she told her.

Your little niece and nephew came running in the kitchen laughing and playing when your mother held up the spatula cursing them out, “ Let me tell y’all something, stop running in my goddamn kitchen, y’all better be lucky I didn’t put on the cake yet. Now, would you two please go sit down somewhere.”

You laughed at them playing and hitting each other while leaving the kitchen before your mother spoke up again, “ I tell you, those two act just like you and your brother and sister did. All three of y’all irritated the hell out of me, but I love you all to death. Always remember that.”

You heard a deep voice call your name, but you just wanted to keep walking to the end of the path where the light was until you suddenly got dragged back. In reality, you were now being carried to the ambulance truck with Rindou by your side with tears in his eyes while his brother called everyone else in the background.

You felt a hand reach for your hand as they strapped you to the stretcher and multiple sayings of “hang on” and “ I’m gonna be right behind you”. You knew the voice and wanted to smile but couldn’t because you needed to breathe.

Rindou felt like he couldn’t even think because you just got hurt by the enemy and Mikey or anyone else aren’t really believing it. The only reason he knew it was because his brother had everyone on speaker.

When he heard Yasire’ giggle, he lost it, “ Ran! Hang up the phone, there’s no use in talking to stupid bitches, now let’s go before I really put a hit out on Yasire’, I’m feeling murderous right now and she’s gonna be my main target and right now I don’t give a fuck how mi-”

“ Ok!”, Ran yells before hanging up the phone quickly. He smirked at Rindou, “ I knew you liked y/n, I knew it.”

Rindou ignored him and got in their car while Ran got in the passenger seat. He pulled off thinking about you and only you. Did he like you? Only time will tell now.

When Rindou found out you were in a coma, he went on a binge of drinking and partying. He couldn’t handle it, he wanted to tell you everything he’s been meaning to say to you the day you came back after the vacation that you and Mikey had. He could see the sadness upon your posture, but it didn’t match your facial expression which showed happiness and gleefulness.

Another thing he hated is when the guys talked about you in an I’ll manner in front of Yasire’ and other women they were around. He especially hated it when they did it in front of him too. He always leaves the room when Mikey speaks about you. He used to hide his words but later on, Mikey words became more bitter making him have to bite his lip in order to not get killed, so he just leaves the room.

He visits you everyday and was the only one to visit until now when he saw Mikey with flowers and the rest of the men he mainly be around behind him when he entered with his own flowers and stories to tell. He never told Mikey and the others anything about what hospital you were at, only his brother, which means his brother spilled the beans. He had to because of the look he’s giving Rindou now.

Yasire’ was nowhere to be seen because just a few days ago, they learned that she was the one who put the hit out on Bonten. She was working beside her husband from Bonten’s rival gang. She used Mikey and Bonten, but had to pay the price in the most nastiest way.

Her face was torn off and fingers were gone, Rindou was the one torturing her this time while her husband now has flies flying over his body from Sanzu torturing him while laughing at his pleas. Mikey was stunned that he turned away and left the room. He was double crossed and this is his first time too.

“ Y/n, look I brought these flowers for you. I was hoping you’d be awake, but you’re in a coma…Tell me Rindou, why are you bringing my wife flowers and hiding where she stays?”, Mikey asks prior to turning around to face an irritated Rindou at the entrance.

Mikey continued not even letting him get a word out, “ She’s mine. Don’t you dare think about getting with her or near her. How dare you try to hide her in a unknown hospital when we own the fucking hospital Rin, how stupid could you b-”

Rindou couldn’t respond because he was watching your fingers move and finally your strangled voice called out to someone he never thought you would say.

“ Rin.”, You say before Mikey eyes widened at his wife speaking, only calling out the wrong name. Everyone else sighed in relief when they heard your annoying little voice again. They may not have liked you but that didn’t mean they didn’t have some “respect” for you.

Rindou hurried and grabbed your hand as you turned your head to him with low and tired eyes, “ Rin? That’s you? Thank you for watching over me and talking to me. You were the main reason I held on for this long. By the way, how long has it been?”

Rindou smiled before sucking up his tears, not wanting to cry in front of his comrades and his boss, especially over his wife who he didn’t get a chance to divorce yet, “ It’s been two months, n/n.”

Everyone paused because he never called you a nickname before so why now. Did he have a death wish?

You tried to smile but ended up coughing, which made him hurry to bring the cup of water to your mouth, but you laughed because they were little coughs, “ God Rindou! I’m okay, I just need to breathe, slow down and sit down, I’ll talk to you soon.”

Rindou nodded before sitting down and moving his leg up and down anxiously. He knew he could either be turned down or shot for you. He didn’t want any of that.

You slowly moved your head to Mikey, “ You. Why are you here? You cause me this pain, look at me Mikey! Look!”

Mikey couldn’t look at you because he turned the chair to the wall and sat down, staring at it with silent tears. He couldn’t face you, not after putting you through hell and back.

“ And you all! Why the hell are y’all here, hmm? Did you come here to laugh or take pictures, which one?”, you ask, trying to keep your sentences short so you don’t have to do a lot of talking.

Sanzu being the smart ass he is spoke up, “ I mean we could have but then I don’t want anyone like y-”

Mikey stood up at the same time as Rindou and they both scared Sanzu because of the look they were giving him. Mikey pointed a finger to the door, “ Out. All of you!”

Most of them sighed before touching your covered feet or tilting their heads on the way out, meanwhile Rindou stayed where he was making his brother, who was the last one to stop to try to grab him. He suddenly snatched away from Ran and declared he’s staying no matter what. Ran sighed before stepping out and closing the door— standing right beside it just in case anything goes down between his brother and his boss, Mikey.

Mikey gave Rindou a stare that had malicious intent and you could feel it, so you spoke up, “ What could you possibly say that he can’t hear?”

“ Y/n, let’s not do this and just come home with me.”, Mikey says, taking your hand.

Rindou laughed before speaking up, “ How dare you? How dare you act like you care about her just because the other girl slipped up and fucked you over. Now you want to come back to her.”

Mikey snapped his head to Rindou, “ I’m speaking to my wife! Are you going against me!” Rindou did nothing but laughed until you spoke up, “ He's Not going against you, Mikey. Rindou, baby, can you step out for a minute? I’ll yell if he tries to strangle me while I’m at my weakest.” It was a joke but Rindou took it seriously while Mikey's facial expression dropped in disbelief and sadness. Did you always think he’ll do that to you? And why are you calling Rindou baby?

Rindou smiled when he saw you nod your head before stepping out with a smile on his face at the word baby until he was slapped in the back of his head by Ran, who was shaking his head at his little brother.

Inside the room, You and Mikey stared at each other in utter silence.

He was about to speak when you suddenly spoke before him, “ I want a divorce!”

He was stunned as he gulped down his fear that was laced as spit, “ Y-”

You shook your head, “ No, don’t argue, just agree and get out. It’s for my mental health and I refuse to be with someone who treated me like shit because let me ask if she would’ve never betrayed Bonten, would you still be with her?”

Mikey tried to walk to you but you held up your hand, so he spoke instead, “ Y/n, plea-”

“ Manjiro shut the fuck up and answer the fucking question!”, You yelled in anger and exhaustion.

Mikey gulped before looking away and nodding his head confirming not only his answer but his divorce too. He was letting you go because he knew he was bringing you pain when you said your final words to him.

“ Great! That’s all I needed. The divorce papers will be sent to your office. Goodbye Mikey, it was a glorious ride, now see yourself out please and send Rindou in.”, You say not caring about his hurt expression.

Mikey slowly trudged to the door and opened it but not before stopping to say one last thing while Rindou was standing at the door opening, “ Have a good life y/n, you were the one who made me happy all this time. I was blinded before and now I’ve gotten my happiness taken from me again.”

He then looked at Rindou with hatred and admiration in his eyes, “ Take care of y/n for me, Rindou.” On his way out he thought heavily about you and Rindou. He wanted to know what was so special about Rindou, he found out while sitting on the bench outside the hospital with tears in his dead eyes : it was the love and care he gave you that he couldn’t give you. He will always hate himself for giving you and Rindou the chance to love each other, but it’s for your own good.

━━ ༉⁩༊ Tagging: @dejwrites @eiflawriting @simpingfor-wakasa @happygoluckyalexis @mastermindenoshimaalicia @bontens-angel @bontensbabygirl @celi-xxmoon @ushijimasslut @Nalyana @cryingchild83 @mikeys-gf @anyahlator

#tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers x black!reader #tokyo revengers angst #mikey angst #mikey sano x reader #rindou x reader #rindou haitani #rindou haitani fluff #fluff #angst #black!reader #fem reader #chubby reader #anime men x reader #anime men #anime x black!reader #x black reader #tokyo revengers

[vamossainz55]

love is easy (love is kind) - carlos sainz jr.

a 4 + 1 : the four times carlos almost says i love you, and the one time he (kind of) does | fluff, no warnings a/n: this one has been brewing in my drafts for ages, i hope you enjoy it

i.

the first time it almost happens is the same time he realizes, wound up in his drivers room before a race.

“what are you even staring at?” your voice bounces off the walls with an amused laugh, ripping his attention away from the window to glance over you instead. 

he’s playing with his lips, bottom lip pinched between his index and his thumb as he watches you walk over to him. 

the sound of your steps is nothing new, he’s so familiar with the beat that he would recognize it even with his eyes shut. for the first time though, he notices the way your hips sway at each step.

you’re dressed simply, how you’ve always preferred: a nice classic t-shirt (that is probably his) along with a pair of blue jeans. 

it’s nothing new, he’s pretty sure he’s seen you wear it a million times before. 

but his shirt looks better on you than it usually does, and your jeans hug your curves in a way that makes him feel wrong for looking. you look different, but he can’t seem to point out why. he can’t seem to pull his eyes away either though.  

he’s too busy studying you to realise how close you’ve gotten, suppressing the little jolt his body has the moment your hands find their place on his shoulders.

it’s not the first time you’ve been this close. in fact, you’ve been closer, but in that moment it feels like it’s too much for him. without thinking, he instinctively straightens his back, tucking his feet a bit under himself as he scoots to sit further onto the bench. 

if you notice it, you don’t say a thing. instead, both of your eyes meet as he looks up to you, eyes tracing your face as you smile down at him. 

did your smile always look that sweet?

he wants to speak but the breath he takes is intoxicating, the scent of your perfume sends shivers down his spine. he doesn’t understand it, smells the familiar floral notes of your usual fragrance but all of the sudden it’s all he wants to breathe in. 

“you’re zoning out carlos,” you tease, hand loosely looping around his wrist to place it down on his lap. 

the touch almost burns and he feels like his skin is on fire.

“sorry-“ he apologizes, clearing his throat to try to get the overwhelming amount of air out of his lungs. he flushes red when your hand finds his hair, giving his locks a gentle tussle.

“you’ll do amazing, you always do” it’s words that you’ve said countless times before, the usual encouragement you give him every time you attend a race.

he always forgets how much he needs to hear them, up until the moment you’re there to remind him. 

“i just feel weird, a bit nervous” he murmurs, breath caught in his throat from the way your fingers go to fix his hair from the same mess you made. once you’re done, you sit beside him. your knees brush each others as your leg presses against his.

“that’s normal, but hey, you’ve done this a million times before.” right he thinks. you think we’re talking about racing. your fingers intertwine together as soon as your hand finds his.

he wants to laugh, almost does, because at the end of the day, you’re still right. he has done this a million times before. he’s known you since you were both six, stumbling around to play in the park. you held hands the moment you got too scared to go up the rope, and your knees touched when you both tried squeezing down the slide together. 

he doesn’t understand what’s so different, what’s causing the pull in his chest that’s making his stomach twist. 

“hey, look at me,” and he does, heart beating faster. 

you only smile though, tongue swiping over your bottom lip, and he almost needs to look away again to just breathe. 

“just do whatever your gut tells you to,” 

there’s a beat of silence and for a moment he questions whether you’re still talking about racing- or if somehow, in some twisted way of yours you’ve managed to read him, the same way you always do. 

his lips part, words hanging on the tip of his tongue i think - i love you? 

but before he says anything there’s a knock on the door. it startles him to the point where his hand slips out of yours, knees brushing away. 

it’s rupert. “carlos, warm up before the race.” 

he takes a deep breath and gets up, calling back a nervous ‘okay’ before his eyes are darting back to you. 

you’re looking at your hands for a short moment before you look at him. this time you’re the one looking up. 

you smile. “see you later?” 

he nods, letting out a deep breath. “see you later,” 

he doesn’t end up having the guts to tell you before you leave to go home. deciding to wait it out just a bit longer. 

ii. 

the second time is during the summer holidays — you’re on your usual mallorca trip, both of your families agreeing to arrange some of the days to stay in the sainz’s villa together for a little bit. 

he hadn’t seen you since the race, not in person at least. of course, you both consistently caught up. whether it was through off handed texts or quick facetimes here and there, you both always made sure you could still catch up. 

it’s not like anything’s changed per-se. your dynamic remains the same. sure, maybe carlos’ stomach did a weird leap whenever you picked up the phone, or maybe he appreciated a lot more the way your voice curled at certain words, but he kept his tongue between his teeth, a self made promise to wait until he saw you again in person. 

he knew he was postponing it though, the fear of you thinking differently being overpowering. the only worst thing he could imagine than having his heart broken by you would be losing your friendship. 

that’s why, even after months of deliberation, hours of laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling trying to figure out how to tell you, the moment you enter the villa, pushing your oversized luggage with a wide smile on your face, his mouth goes dry and he forgets every single word he wants to say. 

you smile at him, eyes crinkled and a wave of your hand.

he sucks in a deep breath and smiles back, walking over to you with open arms. 

confessing to you is a long forgotten memory for the rest of the trip. its easy to fall back into the rhythm with you. 

he thinks its fine, you’re both fine, but things are always fine until alcohol is involved. 

he should’ve known better. 

you’re both pressed against each other in a club, music so loud that he swears he can feel it in his veins. 

the night had taken a steep turn. one glass of wine with the parents turned into one whole bottle, and one bottle after dinner turned into two (and at some point, you really did lose count). 

before he could even grasp what was happening you had already convinced him to get dressed to get to the nearest club. what if we don’t get to party together any time soon? you had asked. 

and that’s how you both end up there. in a packed club with the base buzzing through your body. you’re dancing, back pressed against his chest as your hips sway to the music and he swears his heart is about to beat out of his chest. 

he tries his best to move his own body with yours. 

he steps to the right, before stepping to the left, but he struggles to find the rhythm, feet nervously moving side to side in an attempt to somewhat dance. of course by his clumsy luck he steps on the back of your heel, sputtering an apology just as you turn to face him. 

you do so with a smile, and of course you do. 

“you’re always so stiff,” you joke, arms swinging over his neck as you move closer to let some people pass. his hand instinctively goes to your back, sliding down to your waist to keep you in place. he feels how clammy his hands are; he can only hope that you don’t comment on it. 

“well, you know I don’t like dancing.” carlos murmurs, and your faces are so close to one another that he can count each one of your lashes if he wanted to. you let out a small laugh at his words, looking down as your nose tickles his shoulder. 

he can feel your breath against his neck and he can feel the bumps forming on his skin. 

“I know, thank you for dancing with me.” you say softly before looking up at him again. 

he isn’t sure if it’s the flashing lights in the club but for a split moment, he sees stars in your eyes. 

it takes everything in him not to kiss you. 

you both dance until your feet are sore, sing until your voices are gone, and laugh to the point where your cheeks are hurting . 

the night ends almost the same way it starts, both of you sitting in the back of a cab, carlos almost slurring out his address to the driver. he says the name of his street before pausing because, what was his house number again? 

“house number thirty-five please,” you say, finishing carlos’ floating sentence as you press yourself as close as possible into his side. the car is moving and your head is spinning and you just need to feel him next to you. 

you miss the way carlos swallows, the way he bites the inside of his cheek as his eyes gaze over you. 

you’re saying something about the night, how fun it is and how much you missed having those nights together and carlos can only listen along, watching you scroll through your phone. he wonders whether you two could be like this all the time. just you two. 

his tongue swipes over his bottom lip, three words floating in his mind. i love you. 

he’s about to say it, the words practically about to drip off his tongue. before he opens his mouth though he sees you open a chat. 

“jack?” he asks teasingly, the name not ringing a bell to him. “is that your boyfriend?” you often tease each other like this, but your answer startles him. 

“actually,” you pause, looking up at carlos with a flustered expression. “I’m kind of seeing him,” theres a little twitch of carlos’ nose but he stops himself from reacting, biting the inside of his cheek to stay grounded. it takes him a split second to muster up the courage to speak, but even then he doesn’t have much to say.

“oh, that’s nice” he simply responds; the three words never end up leaving his lips. 

because ultimately, he rather have a bit of you, than none at all. 

iii. 

the third time it happens is when he’s visiting you, in the heart of london, tucked in a bar’s booth.

he’s meeting the infamous jack, a curly haired blonde boy with blue eyes who shows his dimples everytime he smiles. carlos learns that he’s born and raised in london, grew up in a well-off family. he’s smart (like you), has a master’s degree in computer engineering and is now working on starting a startup, that no matter how many times he tries to explain, carlos can’t really seem to understand. 

most importantly though, carlos learns, that he’s there for you. he lives ten minutes away from yours. picks you up in the morning to take you to work, and comes over every other night. he cooks the dinner, you wash the dishes, and he buys you flowers on the way to yours every thursday when the market is open. 

carlos learns that jack is everything that he isn’t. and it’s fine, he’s fine. the bitter pill had been swallowed the night in the club. he had seen the blush on your cheeks, and the smile on your lips. 

that’s why he’s surprised, confused even, that in that same night, as soon as jack leaves you both to go out for a call, you bump your foot into his with a guilty look on your face. 

“what’s wrong? i like him.” carlos says, brows furrowed as he leans back onto his chair. you mirror the same actions as him, sighing softly as your arms cross over your stomach. you mumble something under your breath, but the bar’s too loud for him to hear. 

“what?” he asks again, this time leaning closer. you look mildly annoyed as you run a hand through your hair. 

“i said i think i don’t like him,” you look guilty again, and even through the dim lighting, carlos can see your eyes go over him, studying his expression, looking for an answer that unfortunately he doesn’t have.

“what do you mean you don’t like him? he sounds like he’s nice, treats you well,” he murmurs, this time hunching over the table to hear you better. his eyes bounce from you to the door, double checking to see if jack is anywhere near.

“that’s not what i meant,” you sigh in frustration. “i mean like- i don’t like-” you stumble over your words, trying your best to find the best way to say it. when you realise you can’t, you just blurt it out. “i don’t think i love him.” you say it a bit exasperated this time. his brows knit together and his head tips to the side.

carlos is quiet for a bit, and you practically can hear the cogs turning in his brain as he tries to understand you. he clears his throat, swallows whatever knot that is forming in his throat. “you’ve been seeing him for like what? four months? these things take time no?” 

“i know these things take some time, but, i just don’t think i can fall inlove with him.” your fingers graze over the rim of your wine glass before you hold the stem and twirl it. “i mean- i don’t know if i’ve ever been inlove,” it’s not really a confession to any of you, you were twenty five, almost twenty six now and you had never found yourself in a long-term relationship. 

“i mean, if you know, you know.” carlos almost cringes with how cheesy he sounds, and you clearly agree with the way you roll your eyes. 

“have you been inlove?” the question floats in the air for a bit, and carlos’ breath hitches a little when he looks up to meet your gaze. 

“i think so,” he’s been in relationships before, one long term one and several short flings. they never lasted, or amounted to anything fruitful. there was no bad blood with any, none of them just, went anywhere.  but he wasn’t thinking of them when he was answering your question.

“how does it feel like?” your question is innocent, just like the way you smile at him before resting your chin on your hand. carlos can’t help but smile back. 

“it’s small things, i think. for me, love feels like the first sip of coffee in the morning.” he had your order memorized by heart. a latte macchiato with a pump of vanilla and oat milk. 

“or the smell of fresh bread when you pass by a bakery?” he remembers your baking phase. taste testing more than a dozen cakes for weeks. he swore he couldn’t eat chocolate for a month after.

“or the giddy feeling you get in your stomach when you tell a joke that makes people laugh?” you nod at his question, a small smile on your lips as you hold back a laugh. 

his chest swells a little, really, but he doesn’t show it. “i think most importantly, love is easy. it’s the first person you want to text when something happens, good or bad,” he wonders if you know, if you can hear the rush of his heart beat.

“love is,” carlos stops, not because he wants to but because he notices the way the door opens and closes, spots jack’s figure approaching the table. he feels a clap on his back, prompting him to straighten back in his seat almost instantly. 

he flashes your boyfriend a smile, watching the way he slides into the booth next to you and giving you a kiss in the process. 

love is.. carlos thinks, love is… the way I love you.’

iv. 

the fourth time he almost says it, the world stops a little. in a surreal type of way that he doesn’t understand what’s going on. 

you and jack didn’t last. but he didn’t stand a chance after carlos’ small little speech. he felt sorry, really. he was a nice guy, but carlos couldn’t deny the little sense of satisfaction when you had told him you both called it quits.

none of you bring up your break up apart from the are you okay? question carlos had asked when he found out. you simply had given him a smile and shrug with a promise of i’ll be fine, and somehow he convinces himself to trust your word for it. 

he comes to learn though, that you are fine. he sees it from the moment he picks you up from the airport, rosy cheeked and blurry eyed from the flight. despite that, you’re smiling, dimpley and excited as you hug him (you hold onto him for a tad bit longer than usual, but he doesn’t complain). 

by the end of the day you’re both in carlos’ parents’ kitchen, quietly helping them dry out the plates. reyes is by the counter, sipping on her glass of wine with carlos sr. putting away the plates. 

it’s easy the way you all move around eachother, the domesticity of it all. you flow between his family like water down a stream, fitting perfectly into the commotion of it all. of course reyes teases you both, how can she not when she sees the way her son looks at you? or the stolen glances you gave back when he wasn’t looking. 

she doesn’t push it too far though, she never does. instead, she makes sure her and her husband are tucked in bed the moment the house is clean.

by the time you’ve both unwinded, you’ve decided to crash on the couch for a movie, both too wide awake to sleep just yet.  

the lion king is playing, both of your favorites, and despite the stretch of the couch you’re tucked into carlos’ side. you’re flushed against him, and he can’t help but draw absent minded cirlces onto your arm, with his arm that's wrapped around you. 

it’s a usual set up for your movie nights but something feels different. 

it isn’t helping that he can feel your gaze bouncing from the tv to him. he lets it slide four times before lowering his head to look at you, brow raised. 

“what? don’t tell me you want popcorn now?” he asks, knowing that he could always make you get it yourself. its not like you didn’t know the house well enough. not that he ever would though.

“no, i was just thinking,” you murmur, looking over at him and he moves a little to face you better, leaning his head against the couch. 

“what is it?” he asks, reaching over to fix a single strand of hair of yours that was sticking out. you watch him closely, features soft and murmuring a thank you once his hand moves away.

“about what you were saying about love,” it takes carlos a moment to remember, and when he does his breath falters a bit. you notice it, but you continue anyways. 

“i think i get it now,” carlos can only nod, prompting you to continue, “it’s like the feeling when someone gives you the last bite of their food,” you think of the ice cream you had shared with him over dinner. you’d given him the last  bite- since he’d realised too late you had gotten vanilla at the last moment. you complained (of course), but still hovered the spoon infront of carlos’ lips.

“or like the feeling of your hand out the window of a moving car breaking through the wind” you’d always have the best car drives with carlos, driving aimlessly outside the cities, enjoying the quieter scenery.

carlos doesn’t miss the way your eyes drop from his eyes to his lips, and his world stills. “but ultimately, i think love for me is the feeling of being with someone, and feeling at home.” 

you both don’t know how you’ve both gotten so close, foreheads almost touching as you look into eachothers eyes. the only sound in the room is the faint soundtrack of lion king which had been long forgotten by now. his gaze flickers from your eyes to your lips, and he lets out a shaky breath. he has to say it. 

and he almost does, lips parted to speak, but instead of his voice the next thing he hears is a loud bark. you both flinch, a space being created between you.

both of your eyes jump towards the door, to find piñon, innocently turning his head to the side. carlos almost curses. almost. 

“i… need to take him out.” he murmurs, getting up to grab piñon’s leash. 

v. 

the first time he says it… well he doesn’t really say it. 

it happens right after the race is over, after he crosses the line and pushes himself out of the car. the crowd is cheering and his ears are numb from Adami’s screams on the radio. he somehow can’t feel his legs, or his hands, or his face. he finally did it. he’s won his home race.

he’s smiling, so wide that he feels like his cheeks are going to shatter. climbing over the seat before he stands, raising both his fists in the air. 

the moment he jumps off the car he’s running to his team. he hugs them tight, but they only hug him tighter. if he wasn’t running on adrenaline, he wouldn’t be sure how he would have pulled away. 

he moves to the rest of the team, unclasping and taking off his helmet before he rips the balaclava off. as soon as the fresh air hits him, his head whips around, looking for you. 

the moment he sees you its like tunnel vision, he runs to you, high with a mix of adrenaline and the thrill of winning. 

“carlos-” before you can say anything else he  closes the gap, stealing the next words from your lips.

he pulls away wide eyed and breathless, your lips still ghosting eachothers. “congratulations,” you murmur and carlos nods, lips parting and he wants to say it, wants to scream it, but he’s feeling too much that the words don’t come out of his mouth.

instead though you smile, shaking your head. he didn’t need to say it. 

“carlos, i know, i know, me too.” 

#carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz fanfic #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #f1 fiction #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula one x you #formula one x reader #formula one imagine #carlos sainz imagine #cs55