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rreids · 1 month

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Ok ok this idea has been rotting in my head for a a WHILE- So, the truth or dare episode? but what about exBAU!Reader who left the team to take care of her and Spencer’s child, and she finds out about what JJ said? And she either gets angry or insecure? I keep picturing a badass reader but I could also see the insecurity too. -🦋

TRUTH • S. REID X READER

fem reader; 14 x 15 spoilers; reader is pregnant; spencer girl dad!; angst; fluff; we are anti-jeid in this household she is at most familial to him i take no criticism; spencer is so cheesy and in love (with the right person god bless); ~1.2k words

“—to say something that would get your attention…” you walk up to Spencer and JJ, ready to tell them about the cake cutting, and pause.

You’re not big on listening in to conversations and you trust Spencer, but something about the hushed tones has you on edge.

”Jennifer… truth or dare?” Your brows furrow at his voice and the question.

JJ pauses. And since when was she Jennifer? “Truth.”

“Did you mean it?”

You can’t wait. “Spence? JJ? They’re getting ready to cut the cake, you should come…”

They quietly exchange a few more words and your frown deepens, torn between worry and frustration. Spencer lingers a little too long on the spot, running his thumb over his wedding ring.

“Spence?”

He looks up. “Hi, honey,” his voice is soft, almost apologetic.

You sigh. “Is it going to upset me?”

He nods. “Probably.”

“Then it can wait. We’re here for Rossi and Krystall. Come on, everyone’s waiting.”

Spencer follows you and you don’t have to fake your smile as everyone settles into cheers and celebration, even if it fades a little while dancing with your husband. His brow is pinched, and you don’t like the pit in your stomach. Something was wrong.

After you’re sure you’re no longer tipsy from the red wine, you find Rossi and Krystall — “listen, I’m so sorry, but our babysitter…”

“Go,” Rossi laughs. “I know it’s hard for you to be away from her.”

It was true. You’d left the team and gone back to the legal field — in a desk job, with normal hours — to spend time with your daughter. It was a hard decision, but you decided you needed the structure. To be available if anything happened. You still loved and adored your friends, meeting up with them often and providing structure for them too.

“I’m so happy for you two,” you tell them between hugs, and you find Spencer finishing his rounds.

“Honey…” Spencer starts and you swallow against the lump in your throat. “Can we talk?”

“Can it wait until we’re home, Spence?” Your voice is almost pitifully weak, and you don’t even have a reason for it to be. “Izzy needs Mommy and Daddy to say goodnight.”

Spencer melts. “Of course.”

And that’s what happens. He tells her a story — one he clearly remembers and is reenacting, memories from his mother when he was a kid — and you tuck her in with a kiss.

It’s tense. You hate it.

“Do you…” you can barely get out the words. “Something happened. With JJ. I know you two were trapped together with Casey — and he was huge on truth or dare, so that conversation today… it’s related.” You’re tripping over them but you can’t stop talking. “Do you… do you love her? What’s going on, Spence?”

He shakes his head quickly. “She told me she loved me.”

You bite your lip. “And you think the best thing to ask is if she meant it?” Your voice quivers with barely restrained rage. “We have a daughter, Spence. You have another kid on the way.”

Spencer clasps your hand in his. “And I want nothing other than a life with you and them. Let me talk, sweetheart, please,”

You want to pull back, but you know not to reject him. Not now, when it could seem so final.

“Talk.”

Spencer sighs. “She’s saying she was saying it to get my attention, to make it clear I needed to do something — that nothing would be good enough for him… nothing could be his needed confession.

And I wanted to know if she meant it because she knows I’ve been head over heels for you since the day you walked through the BAU’s doors, only a year after I did. I thought you were gorgeous, and I could barely get out a ‘hello—’” you smile at the memory: he had been awkward, tripping over a greeting while you introduced yourself “—and JJ knew that. She does know I’m head over heels for you, even now.

She actually gave me advice. On how to ask you out, that first time, when we went to the film festival and you pretended you knew everything about how camera language worked on screen and I pretended not to know any better…” Spencer laughs when you whine, embarrassed. “So she’s always known I was yours from the moment I laid eyes on you. And she’s always been Will’s. I wanted to know if it had all been some kind of trick.”

You hum. “Was it?”

“Well, somebody came to tell us the cake was getting cut,” he nudges his nose against your cheek and presses a kiss to your skin. “So I didn’t get to hear, not in exact terms. But I don��t think she loves me as anything but a younger brother. An annoying one, at that. It wasn’t a trick for me, some plan to win me over she was in the long haul for. It was a trick for Casey. I… I shot him. He was going to kill JJ, he said it wasn’t good enough to save her life. It gave me the time to get my gun and aim.”

“You have perfect aim,”

“Now I do,” Spencer laughs, and you melt a little. “Remember when Hotch had to train me?”

You do.

“Spence.”

“Honey.”

“The next time a girl tells you they’re in love with you, I need you to laugh in their face and show them your ring.”

“I don’t want to do that to you,”

You sigh and lean into him, unable to stop the smile at the assuredness he has in your love, curling into his chest. “Okay, well, next time a girl who isn’t me does it, you tell me. I never want to be that upset with you again.” You trace your fingers over his stubble, his defined jaw, mapping out his features. “You’re mine. And I hate fighting.”

He kisses the top of your head, hand coming down to your beginning bump. “I’m all yours,” he agrees. “And I’m sorry for making you worry or making this more than it needed to be, I should’ve told you right after I got back from the case. After everything you’ve given up for me, I should kiss the ground you walk on.”

“You should.”

You can’t keep a straight face, dissolving into a fit of giggles as he murmurs praises of you and whispers of his adoration like a prayer.

“Oh, my love, may I lay out the red carpet before every—” you cut him off with a tender kiss, sweet and warm. He smiles against you, and brings his hand up to undo the pins in your hair, letting it cascade down your shoulders and next to his face.

Spencer pulls back and tucks the stray pieces behind your ears before cupping your face in his hands. “You are the only woman for me. I promise I will always want and choose you, just like I promised before everyone else all those years ago.”

You smile. “And I always want you, Spence.”

“Even when I’m telling you about my new passion for crosswords and interest in designing one myself?”

“Especially then.”

an emoji anon?? for ME>??? i love winning.. a little more angsty than badass but she is also angry. as she should be. (welcome im so so so happy KDFJKG i hope u like it <3)

#my works #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fic #spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #requested #🦋 anon #cm spoilers

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lilyrizzy · 2 months

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continuation and happy ending for this break up fic. i fixed it! (and maybe did a sloppy job of it oops) BUT I hope this brings someone, somewhere joy.

When Daniel gets to the door of his apartment, there is a tall, cardboard box propped up against his door. He doesn’t know when it was delivered because he’s spent the last few nights since being back in Monaco bouncing between Scotty’s place and Blake’s, drinking more and sleeping less than he should.

It’s how he ended up in this mess in the first place; stuck in the minor injuries unit, bleeding and embarrassed, waiting for Max to come and rescue him. Because even now, six fucking months later, he still hasn’t changed his emergency contact information back to Blake.

Sighing, Daniel balances the box in one hand and fumbles with his keys in the other to get his front door open. Once inside he dumps the box onto the counter and pours himself a glass of water. Takes a sip, sets the glass back down, and feels lost.

The truth is, he doesn’t know what was worse. That he hadn’t expected Max to show up, or that he did, and even though Daniel saw him nearly every weekend still, like this it was- Different. Max with his mussed up hair like he’d rolled straight out of bed to come to the hospital for Daniel, reminding him of everything he didn’t want to remember.

Like how their kind of falling apart happened slowly, so slowly that the track limits crept up on them, and by the time Daniel tried to hit the break they were already in the wall. Small disagreements built on top of months of half-conversations, until resolution stopped being the goal. Instead, it was to get through a week, a day, a morning without cracking whatever tentative peace they’d found the last time.

Shaking his head is a bad idea considering he might have a concussion, but Daniel can’t stop himself from doing it. As though his brain is an etch-a-sketch from which the fights and the furious words he spat at Max regularly can be erased.

He groans out loud, tipping the rest of the water down the sink before turning his attention back to the parcel. Ripping it open gives his shaking hands something to do, gives his nail bed a rest from his anxious chewing.

A sweet smell hits him first, before his eyes can make sense of what he’s seeing, and-

Whatever he had been expecting, it wasn’t a bouquet of tulips and a small, hand-drawn card.

To brighten your day, Uncle Daniel, the note attached said, in Isaac’s messy scrawl, but he bet the wobbly hearts underneath were all Izzy. The words all Michelle.

It’s enough to put the smile back on his face for just a moment, even as his stomach churns with the same homesick feeling he’s been unable to shake since he left his and Max’s apartment. Placing the card down, he takes one of the petals between his thumb and finger, feeling the waxy smoothness against his skin.

They’re a bigger bouquet than the tulips he’d brought for Max one time, back when their fights could be so easily fixed. Daniel can still remember the pleased flush that warmed Max’s cheeks as he’d looked between Daniel’s face and the flowers, eyes wide like this was the most romantic thing someone had ever done for him.

At the time, it had made Daniel proud of himself. Now, it just makes him sad. The idea that crappy, half-wilting tulips brought from a supermarket in Monaco could mean so much when Max deserved the world.

But this had been the way things always went. Daniel would show up with a poker chip from Vegas, a guitar pick from LA, a seashell from Perth, and Max would beam at him like he was the sun for bringing him a gift. Or just- maybe just because Daniel showed up at all.

I don’t understand, Daniel, why nothing with you is ever enough. Max had always thrown in his face whenever Daniel picked a fight as a plea for words, for attention, for affection. I am here, aren’t I? The more than you was always unspoken, but still deafening.

I’m always going to be here.

And he still was, living in their apartment that Daniel moved out of months ago. Still sending Daniel’s dad a bottle of wine on his birthday, still cuddling Izzy when he saw her at the grand prix last weekend. Still turning up to hospital waiting rooms for Daniel at four in the morning.

Why do I feel like I have to be a fucking games console to get the tiniest bit of interest from you, Daniel had spat at Max, another evening he’d come home to find Max engrossed in the sim. How am I supposed to trust that you love me when you hardly ever fucking say it?

For not the first time, Daniel wonders if maybe Max had been trying to all along, just not with words.

“Fuck, Maxy,” he says to the empty room. “Fuck sake.”

Rubbing his eyes, he paces to the window, wanting to press his throbbing head against the cool glass. He should go to bed, should crawl beneath the covers and sleep until he wakes up feeling strong enough to try forgetting Max all over again.

Needs to forget his worried eyes scanning over Daniel’s body as though trying to catalog where he might need fixing, the soft way he’d said Daniel’s name under the harsh glare of the hospital lights. His stupid fucking car, flashy even for the streets of Monaco, and far too fast at the same time, that-

That is still parked beneath Daniel’s building on the street below.

His eyes catch on it as they slit open against the rising sun, the sparkle of the paintwork against the tarmac. Daniel glances at the clock above his oven. He’s been home an entire fifteen minutes, and still Max hasn’t moved. If he’s not careful he’ll get a parking ticket.

Some things are worth it, he’d told Daniel when he’d warned him of the same thing, a million years ago now, picking Daniel up from the airport and lingering too long in the ‘kiss and fly’ lane.

In another life.

The life Daniel wants more than he can remember the reasons he walked out of it.

“Max,” Daniel finds himself calling out stupidly, even though it’s obvious Max can’t hear. He opens the balcony door, stepping out onto it and calling it louder. “Max!”

Though the traffic on the street below is quiet, almost non existent at this hour, Daniel’s shouts still don’t seem to carry far enough. There’s no sign Max has heard, no opening of a car door, no emergence of his blonde head from the drivers seat.

Daniel needs to do more, he needs-

Stepping back into the apartment, his eyes search his kitchen frantically until his hands grab the flowers on instinct. For a moment, he considers walking down the stairs and handing them to Max, an offering, an apology, a chance, but-

Daniel can’t let him drive away. He can’t risk running down the stairs only to find him gone when he reaches the pavement and steps back out into the Monaco sunrise. This moment is his tenth of a second, small but capable of making all the difference as long as he doesn’t take his foot off the pedal.

A split second of madness passes, and he finds himself back on the balcony pulling one of the stems loose from the bouquet. Before he’s thought about it anymore, he’s watching it hurtle off the edge towards Max’s car. It misses, landing just to the side by his front left tyre, Daniel isn’t giving up.

Stem by stem, he pulls the flowers loose, throwing them down onto Max’s car. His aim gets better, and soon nearly each one is landing on his bonnet or his windshield. Their petals make a soft sound as they hit the shiny bodywork of the car. Sunshine yellow against Ferarri red.

Finally, the car door opens and Daniel waits, arm suspended backwards in midair, still clutching a fistful of stems.

“Daniel, what the fuck are you doing?” Max shouts eventually, scrambling from the car looking pissed.

He covers his hand over his eyes to shield himself from the growing daylight, face screwed up as he squints up at Daniel. His expression should be a reminder of so many bad memories, and it is, but it’s also something Daniel doesn’t want to miss anymore.

“Maxy!” He shouts, letting the rest of the flowers drop to the floor in favour of leaning over the balcony. His heart is pounding so hard against his rib cage that he’s surprised the railing beneath him isn’t vibrating with it. “Can you- I love you. Can you come upstairs?”

For a moment, Max’s face just melts into blankness. The moment stretches, long enough that Daniel’s brain starts scanning for a joke to make, to backtrack, to just get out, but then-

Max smiles. A different kind of sunshine, but still so fucking bright.

“I love you too,” he calls up, his voice more than a little croaky. “I think- I think it would be better if I told you this more, before, but- But also I think it would be better if you came home.”

Daniel’s trainers slap quickly against every other step on the way back down the stairs.

#for once i stuck to my word and wrote the happy ending!#and it was bloody hard lol so #sorry if it sucks!#fic #max/daniel #also ignore delivery logistics that dont make sens plsss lol

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sixhours · 3 months

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One Day at a Time - Chapter 6 - Transition

Author's note: Good news! The rest of this will probably be posted today, with the exception of an epilogue I haven't had the guts to write. When I do, it will be posted as a separate work, and it's not necessary to wrap up this story. Thank you for reading! Your comments and reblogs are feeding me. <3

Series Chapter Index | Read on AO3 | Complete

Rating: Explicit, 18+, here be smut Series tags: The Last of Us, The Last of Us (HBO), Joel Miller x f!OFC, Joel & Ellie, mostly follows canon, SMUT, gratuitous smut, dubious consent (drunk sex), unplanned pregnancy, fluff, references to past miscarriages, angst, hurt/comfort, romance, age gap (~21 years), childbirth, fluffy baby stuff, I've probably forgotten some so please let me know <3

~*~

After weeks of sleeping on the narrow, lumpy mattress in Ellie’s old room, his back finally gives out.

He’s reaching for the coffee pot and something about how he moves his shoulder causes a domino effect of rippling pain that starts at the nape of his neck and ends by setting his sciatic nerve on fire, every muscle along his spine locking up tighter than a fist.

He barely makes it to the couch, easing himself down to a prone position with a groan that he hopes Charlie can’t hear from the bedroom.

Her footsteps echo on the stairs.

No such luck.

“Did someone just die down here?”

“M’fine,” he mutters through gritted teeth. “Just my back.”

“What happened?“

Ellie chooses that moment to come through the front door. “Joel? I need a–”

“He’s on the couch. Think his back gave out,” Charlie says, now standing over him, looking concerned.

Ellie’s face pokes over the back of the couch. “Again, old man?”

“M’fine,” he repeats, trying to roll to his side to try to stand, but that only aggravates the nerve and sends a ripple of spasms up his traitorous spine. “Fuck!”

“Should I go find Maria?” Ellie asks. “Those pills she had worked last time–”

“No, I just…need to rest for a minute,” he grumbles, knowing full well he’s out of commission until someone finds him a muscle relaxant.

“Is he always like this?” Charlie asks.

“Pretty much,” Ellie says, too quickly for Joel’s liking.

“I’ll go find Maria,” Charlie says, surprising them both when she takes Joel’s hand and gives it a tender squeeze. Ellie’s eyebrows shoot up.

“Make sure he doesn’t hurt himself again. I’ll be back,” she addresses Ellie before heading out the door.

When Charlie is gone, Ellie plops into the armchair and leans forward, an almost predatory smirk on her face.

“So…is she your girlfriend yet?”

“S’not like–”

“If you say ‘it’s not like that’ one more time, I’ll take the damn pills myself,” she says.

Joel groans. “Do we have to do this now?”

“Got ya right where I want ya,” she says. “Spill it, dude.”

“No, we’re not…I don’t…I dunno,” he grumbles.

“You ‘don’t know?’”

“S’what I said,” he grits his teeth against another wave of pain, forcing himself to lie absolutely still. “It’s complicated.”

Ellie rolls her eyes. “That’s just what grown-ups say when they don’t want to tell you the truth.”

He winces. “Yeah. Well, the truth is…it’s complicated.”

She sighs. “Are you sleeping together?”

“That’s none of your–”

“Just saying, if you’re fucking her, she’s probably your girlfriend. So it’s not that complicated.”

“Ellie, I’m not havin’ this conversation,” he growls, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Well, you should probably figure it out before the baby gets here.”

He can’t argue with that, so he doesn’t.

“It’s gonna be weird…having a baby around,” she says thoughtfully. “Remember how bad Tommy was after Izzy was born? When he kept putting Maria’s breastmilk in his coffee by accident?”

Joel snorts. “Yeah. I remember.”

“You’re gonna be busy,” she says. “Babies are a lot of work.”

Even in his pain, he picks up on the unspoken question in her voice. He softens. He wants to sit up so he can look at her, but his back protests. Instead, he reaches blindly for her hand.

“C’mere.”

There’s a reluctant pause, and then she’s standing beside him, slipping her fingers into his.

“I know I haven’t been, uh…great…lately. M’sorry.”

She shrugs, biting at her lower lip.

“Truth is…I was just gettin’ used to the idea of bein’ your dad, and now with the baby…”

He takes a deep, shaky breath.

“It’s a lot. An’ I know it’s prob’ly a lot for you, too.”

Her voice is too light, like she’s trying to cover something up. “You’ll have a real kid soon.”

He frowns and gives her an experimental pinch between her thumb and index finger. “Dunno. You feel pretty real to me.”

“You know what I mean,” she says softly, and he feels it in his heart, a twinge more powerful than any back spasm. He grips her fingers tighter.

“It’ll be different for a while…and yeah, I’m not gonna get much sleep. Prob’ly be…distracted. But it’s still you and me, kid,” he says. “An’ I’m always gonna be here.”

His back takes that moment to seize up again and he hisses. “Shit, sorry.”

She sighs, but there’s a smile in it. “At this rate, you’re always gonna be here on the couch .”

“What’d you need, anyway?” he groans, trying to change the subject.

“Oh, a hammer.”

“What for?”

“Cat found me this new poster, was gonna hang it in my room.”

“There’s one in my toolbox; s’by the door,” he says. “Just put it back when you’re done.”

She narrows her eyes. “You’re not gonna hurt yourself again, are you? Your girlfriend’ll have my ass.”

His answering glare has no effect and she leaves him, laughing.

Charlie returns with the pills a few minutes later, and he swallows two of them eagerly before she can fetch a glass of water. Then he hears her rummaging around up in the bedroom. She comes back with a heating pad.

“Found it at the post,” she explains. “Your kid is killing my hips. Lift up.”

Your kid.

He frowns. “I don’t need—“

“Spare me,” she sighs. “Lift up.”

So he does, still grumbling, and she slides the pad under his lower back and plugs the cord into the wall. It’s instantly warm, oozing heat up his spine, and the muscles slowly start to unwind. He can’t hold back a groan of relief.

“It’s the bed, isn’t it?” she sighs, easing herself into the armchair.

“No,” he says too quickly. “Strained it at work. Tommy’s got us workin’ doubles to get the new barns up.”

“Uh-huh. Maybe you should consider moving back into your room.”

“Not kickin’ you out,” he scoffs.

“I’d stay there, too.”

He side-eyes her. “No playin’ house, remember?”

“I think we might have crossed that line already,” she murmurs, quirking her lips.

Then she’s up and doing something in the kitchen, and Joel tries to focus on letting the heat work its magic. He knows the muscle relaxant has kicked in when he can roll over slightly and it doesn’t make his back seize. He tries to sit up, but Charlie is instantly at his side, holding him down by the shoulders.

“Gotta work,” he mutters weakly.

“Nuh-uh. I already told Tommy you’re out of commission,” she says.

“The hell’d you do–”

“You’re not good at letting people take care of you, are you?”

He grunts. “Says you .”

“Yeah, we have that in common. Not so much fun on the other side, huh?” she murmurs.

She plunks down a mug of coffee, a glass of juice, and a plate of eggs and toast on the table next to him, then puts a DVD in the player and hands him the remote.

“Stay,” she commands. “I’m at the post all day, but I’ll bring you lunch on my break. You’d better be horizontal when I get back.”

He wants to complain, but the pills have made him slow, and she’s out the door before he can think of a response.

The coffee is black and strong, just the way he likes it. The juice is awful–it’s green, some combination of things from the garden–but he chokes it down anyway, thinking of Sarah and her vitamins.

And then he passes out because he forgot that taking muscle relaxants on an empty stomach will do that. He wakes a few hours later, mouth dry and tasting of that awful juice, to find a paper bag and a note from Charlie have replaced the food and drinks on the table.

It’s a sandwich. Take another dose if you need it. I’ll be home by 6.

He’s pleasantly surprised to find he can sit up. Sure, the noise he makes in the process is unflattering, and he’s not going to be doing cartwheels anytime soon, but it’s an improvement.

This time, he eats the sandwich before he takes the second dose and manages to stay awake until Charlie gets home, but his head swims and he barely makes it halfway through their nightly movie. He wakes to her tugging gently on his hand.

“Come to bed.”

He’s too tired to protest. He lets her lead him to his bedroom, lets her pull back the covers and tuck him into bed, lets her wrap her body around his.

“You just wanna take advantage of me,” he slurs lightly into her hair.

She snorts a laugh. “Yes, Joel. This was my grand plan. For you to knock me up and throw your back out so I could keep you as my sex slave.”

“Mmmff. Knew it.”

“Go to sleep, old man,” she murmurs, nuzzling into his chest until he can feel her smile against his skin.

~*~

Sometimes Charlie is so distant, it’s like she isn’t there at all. She stares into space and he has to say her name four or five times before she hears him. Sometimes he has to physically touch her to bring her back, and then she looks at him as though he’s a stranger.

After the second or third time, he recognizes it as the disassociation of grief. He lost days of his life after Sarah was taken from him, days where he existed in body only, when Tess or Tommy would have to pull him back from the edge of a deep, dark pit. He’d wake up unable to remember how he’d gotten to bed or find himself in the middle of a fight with no idea how he’d gotten there. It might have scared him if he thought he had something to lose.

Those are the nights she needs him.

He knows he should turn her away. He knows he’s using her as much as she’s using him. But she comes alive when they’re together, and he tells himself it helps, and maybe it does.

He takes half as many showers.

Tonight, she arches back into him as he thrusts into her on her side from behind, curled around her body, heady with the feeling of being surrounded by her, all soft skin and warmth. She’s murmuring into his palm, slicking her tongue around his fingers, sucking them into her wet mouth and humming. His other hand rubs flutter-like circles against her clit the way he knows she likes.

She’s three orgasms deep and still hungry, panting and pleading, more, there, so close, please .

And then she comes hard, clenching around him and wrenching a hoarse name from her throat.

Not his name.

It barely registers until she’s scrambling away to sit at the edge of the bed, still trembling from the aftershocks, pulling the sheet across her naked chest.

“Shit, shit, shit, I’m sorry,” she gasps.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he soothes, reaching out to pull her back against him, but she jerks away from his touch.

“Fuck,” she grits out, followed by a low, keening sob. “Shit. Fuck.”

Some part of him has always known; the way her eyes clamp shut at the critical moment, the way she positions him and guides him and takes and takes and takes, the way she asks to forget, to pretend. Joel knows it’s foolish to think she needed him and not just the idea of him: a warm body, a working cock and fingers and tongue.

“Charlie, it’s–”

Her muffled sob cracks something in his heart. Then she’s locking herself in the bathroom before he can find his feet.

Shit.

He gets out of bed and pulls on his boxers, goes to the closed door. “Charlie?”

“Go away.”

He rolls his eyes. “Dammit, I’m not…mad.”

Silence.

“I don’t care if you…if you need…if you…fuck,” he hisses. “Just talk t’me.”

Her voice is so faint it barely registers. “I can’t.”

“Okay, you don’t have to, but…can you at least open the door?”

“No.”

He makes a fist against the wall, gritting his teeth. Without a better idea, he turns and slides down the wall, pressing his back to the door.

I’m here , he thinks helplessly. Just tell me what to do.

Silence. And then…rustling, a soft grunt, until they’re back-to-back with the door between them. He hears the hitch of another muffled sob.

“I always…thought it would be him,” she whispers finally, voice thick. “That we’d do this together.”

He feels a familiar shameful flush. What can he say?

I’m sorry it happened the wrong way, at the wrong time, with the wrong person.

I’m sorry I’m not him.

But he’s not sorry at all. He’s a selfish asshole, so he doesn’t say anything.

“We wanted this so much. And sometimes it feels like a…a betrayal. Like I’m moving on…forgetting him.”

He swallows hard, thinking of Sarah, wondering if he might hold this child in his arms and feel that same gnawing guilt, like he doesn’t deserve to be whole again.

“I think he’d want you to be happy,” Joel says softly.

“I tell myself that, I do…but I don’t think I believe it. I don’t–”

More silence. He shifts his weight. The floor is cold and hard, digging into his ass. It can’t be good for her back.

“When we…started…you said…you needed to pretend,” he tries, tipping his head back against the door and closing his eyes. “I knew that goin’ into this. Knew I wasn’t, uh…I’m not–”

“I thought…I wanted…I don’t know,” she hiccups. “I don’t know anymore.”

“We…you don’t need to—”

“It hurts,” she grates out. “It h-hurts and I miss him and it’s not f-f-fucking fair.”

It’s not fucking fair .

What else is there to say?

“I know,” he whispers roughly. “I know.”

They sit like that until his ass is numb and her silence is too unnerving to bear.

“Come back to bed,” he says, defeated and not expecting her to answer. “Please.”

There’s a watery sigh on the other side of the door. Then he hears her moving, the slightest groan as she gets to her feet, and he eases himself off the floor. The door opens. She’s wrapped in a robe, one hand cradling her belly under the terrycloth, the bedsheet pooled at her feet.

Her eyes meet his, red-rimmed and hollow. He cups the back of her neck and pulls her into an embrace.

“S’alright,” he whispers when her tears wet his chest and she shudders against him. He sways like he used to when Sarah was little, rocking her back and forth until she quiets.

“Oh!”

She jumps suddenly, startling in his arms, a soft gasp escaping her lips. Swiping at her eyes, she grabs his hand, guiding it down her body until it’s resting just below her belly button. Her skin is warm and taut and smooth.

“What—“

Then he feels it, the tapping against his fingers, some tiny arm or elbow or foot poking at him from under her skin. She laughs through tears as the insistent little being seems to dance under their hands.

“Never been this strong before,” she whispers thickly.

Joel doesn’t trust himself to speak, pride warring with sadness in his chest. They stay like that for a long time, his hand on her stomach, new life roiling beneath his palm.

~*~

The baby should be able to hear them now, so at night, he reads out loud from a tattered copy of The Fellowship of the Ring , sitting up in their shared bed with a pair of reading glasses perched on his nose. The reading was his idea, the choice of material was hers.

One hand holds the book, the other rests on Charlie’s stomach. She says she likes the sound of his voice, but most of the time, she’s asleep before he gets to the third page. At this rate, the kid will be twenty before they finish the first book in the trilogy.

Tonight, the baby–Coconut, he thinks–is particularly active, rolling and kicking against his hand. A particularly hard jab causes Charlie to jump, hissing a soft ouch under her breath, and he puts the book aside.

“Hey, kid, settle down,” he says, rubbing at the squirming lump. “Let your mama sleep.”

This earns him another pointed jab; the kid is all attitude.

“Mmm,” Charlie mutters. “I know what’d help me sleep.”

“Yeah?”

“Mmmhmm,” she stretches, arching her back, and he can see the outline of one dark nipple through her bra.

“Again?” he murmurs, sliding a hand up to cup her breast and rolling it gently through the fabric. “Already?”

She sighs at the contact. “Mmm. Please?”

He tosses his glasses on the nightstand, more than happy to abandon the book, and curls around her, nuzzling her neck. “‘Fraid I’m not going to be much help with, uh…y’know.”

Not for the first time, he wishes he was about fifteen years younger. Even then, he’s not sure he could keep up with her. He wonders if she was always like this, or if it’s the pregnancy. He wonders if he’ll get to find out.

They don’t talk about this, or what will happen after the baby comes. They go to her midwife appointments together and Joel grinds his teeth through every second, but he stays by her side. Sometimes she holds his hand, and when she kisses him, she does so with the full force of her being. But just like the baby, their relationship doesn’t have a name.

She guides his hand between her legs, under her panties, finding her slick and swollen. She gives a contented little hum of pleasure when his finger traces her seam. “I’m sure you can figure something out.”

He huffs a breath into her nape, kisses the spot where the soft, downy hairs tickle against his nose, and strokes her the way she likes, circling and tapping until she’s arching against him. She comes almost immediately, fluttering and pulsing against his fingertips. A little one.

“More?” he murmurs, gentling his touch as her breathing calms.

“Mmhm, please.”

Her clit is a hard, slick little pebble under his fingers. He draws her orgasm from her more slowly this time, teasing, building her up until her climax is a growl sprung from the depths of her throat and her thighs clench his hand in a vise. He cups her sex gently and trails kisses along her neck, her throat, her shoulder as she rides it out, whispers into the shell of her ear, “More?”

Charlie reaches back and threads her fingers into his hair in answer, pulling him tighter against her, and he breathes her in, sweat and soap and something uniquely her. It drives him crazy, makes him feel feral and protective and alive. She turns her head, seeking his mouth, and he obliges, tongue parting her lips and tasting her as she hums and shivers and writhes against his hand, don’t stop please don’t please don’t stop .

“I got you,” he murmurs against her lips in between kisses, fingers circling and circling until his wrist aches. He can feel the baby roll and kick under his forearm, feels her fingers gripping him there. He loves watching her like this, loves the way her back arches and jaw goes slack with pleasure, the sounds she makes when she comes.

And then she does, coming undone in his arms with a throaty moan, shuddering and keening in a way that makes his cock twitch.

“Better?” he murmurs, finally pulling his hand away and groping for the blanket they’d tossed aside.

“Much,” she sighs, relinquishing herself to his warmth. “You sure you don’t want me to…”

“M’fine,” he says, wrapping an arm around her belly, which has gone mostly still. “Kid calmed down.”

“Yeah. S’the hormones,” she murmurs drowsily. “Oxytocin.”

“They can feel that, huh?”

“Mmhm,” she says. “They can feel everything.”

“...everything?”

“Don’t make it weird,” she murmurs, and he can feel her smirking against his arm. “Read to us?”

Us . They’re slowly bending all the rules, he thinks.

He groans. “Thought you were goin’ to sleep.”

“I am, but I like your voice.”

“Uh huh. Damnit, lost my place,” he grumbles, grabbing for the hefty paperback. “Never find it again, damn book is six-thousand pages long. Thought this’d have dragons, so far they’re just describing’ stuff and yackin’.”

“It’s Tolkien,” she yawns. “It’s a classic.”

“Buncha elves and gnomes and shit,” he mutters. “This Dildo Baggins character sounds like a porn star.”

“They’re hobbits,” Charlie laughs and pokes him in the thigh. “And it’s ‘Bilbo’, you grouch.”

He squints. “Right, need my glasses. Tiny print.”

Charlie snickers, something about old eyes , and burrows deeper into the covers as he finally finds his reading glasses and his place.

He doesn’t make it two pages before he hears her snore.

~*~

They’ve kept up the movie night routine even though there’s no good reason for Charlie to stay off her feet. They’ve rented the last of the action flicks from the library, so now they’re working through television shows and sitcoms. Some unlucky soul from the time before left behind a sizeable collection of M*A*S*H episodes on tape, so Charlie often falls asleep to the sounds of Hawkeye’s sarcastic drawl.

They’re on the couch in their usual spots, her with a bowl of homemade strawberry ice cream perched on her belly, him with a beer. The ice cream is the only thing she craves–strawberry preserves mixed with cream and sugar, then frozen and scooped into a bowl. Joel makes a new batch every other night before they go to bed. They’re going through Maria’s summer preserves like crazy, and he’ll be doing work on the community greenhouses for the rest of his fucking life at this rate.

But it’s worth it, he thinks, as she takes another bite of the rich, creamy concoction, licking the spoon clean with her strawberry-pink tongue. She’s a fucking distraction. The laugh track is going off in the background, but with every bite, her eyes roll back and her lashes flutter, and he wants to take that spoon out of her mouth and–

He adjusts himself, forces his eyes back to the screen, takes another sip of his beer. Jesus .

A few minutes later the bowl is licked clean, and a well-placed kick from the baby sends it rocking, tumbling into her lap.

“Apparently we demand more,” Charlie laughs.

“Kid’s gonna come out lookin’ like a strawberry,” Joel mutters.

She smiles. “Baby wants what it wants.”

The phrase triggers a memory, and he chuckles. “With Sarah, it was mangoes.”

Sarah’s mom, sitting at the kitchen table in their tiny one-bedroom, devouring the fruit straight from the rind, sticky juice coating her fingers, running down her chin.

Baby wants what it wants , she’d said, and then he’d kissed her, lips syrupy sweet.

He doesn’t remember if he loved her–there was no room for love to grow, really. Not enough time, not enough money, not enough maturity between the two of them. But they’d made Sarah, and he’d loved his baby girl enough to make up for the rest.

“Who’s Sarah?”

Charlie snaps him out of his reverie. She’s looking at him curiously.

Oh.

He reaches for the remote, pausing the show, and the silence around them has weight, he can feel it pressing against his chest. He coughs, clears his throat, tries to figure out how to start.

“She was, uh…my daughter. Before.”

She blinks at him, wide-eyed, her question a small, breathless whisper. “You had a daughter?”

He ducks his head. “Yeah. She, uh…was killed on Outbreak Day. She’d be about your age now. Little younger, I guess.”

Her eyes are so bright, they almost glow.

“Her mom…my ex…liked mangoes,” he explains. “When she was pregnant. Couldn’t keep enough of ‘em in the house.”

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“Didn’t know you liked mangoes,” he says weakly, trying for a joke. She doesn’t smile.

He takes a deep breath, trying to keep his voice from shaking. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t tryin’ to hide it. It never felt like a good time, and it’s…I didn’t want you to feel like I was…replacin’ something.”

She looks around then as if seeking some kind of clue, something obvious she might have missed. There are no photos of Sarah on the mantle, no drawings or keepsakes to indicate he’d been a father before Ellie–only the broken watch on his wrist. He holds it out to her, the shattered glass face shimmering in the light of the TV screen.

“She gave me this for my birthday,” he says, and the words stick in his throat. “It’s…all I have.”

“And her name was Sarah?” she says in a small, tight voice.

His smile is sad. “Go figure, huh?”

Her lip quivers. “Joel…”

She sets the bowl aside and starts to get up, the bulk of her belly and gravity working against her.

“Don’t–” he starts, but she makes it to her feet before he can protest.

Then she’s standing between his knees and cradling his face in her hands. There are tears in her eyes, spilling down her cheeks. She cries at everything now, but that doesn’t explain why he wants to cry, too.

He wants to say something reassuring, to set her at ease, but his tongue is thick in his mouth and it hurts like it does sometimes, like the wound is fresh and raw and new all over again.

“I can’t,” he says thickly, pleading. “Not…right now. Not yet.”

She nods slowly, kisses his forehead with something like love, and cradles him against her. Her warm, full belly presses against his chest, against his heart, and he hates that it soothes the ache. It’s too much like forgetting.

Her whisper at his temple is a balm.

“One day at a time.”

#fanfic #fic recs #joel miller #the last of us hbo #the last of us #pregnancy #babyfic

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that1emowitch · 3 months

Text

At the end of the world / Or the last thing I see / You are never coming home, never coming home

Prompt from @tuna-f-b: Do you still do request? If yes and angst is o.k: what would happend i all the bats died? Like how would the hero community react. The supers alone. Clark having to deal with losing his best friend(?) and the kids he basically co parented- as well as seeing his sons lose their best friends(?) Specially as ships that would be awesome angst

A/N: I'm not crying you're crying (Also, for those who don't know, Izzy is Duke's canon gf and one of the Robins from We Are Robin)

Words: 2504

TW: Mentions of blood, Major character death, Coping with loss, Self-blame, Mentions of relapse (drugs)

“If you’re watching this, I am either deceased or indefinitely unable to continue my duties as Batman. But the world still needs Batman. Gotham still needs Batman. My son Damian Wayne, if he is an adult, shall inherit my mantle— if not, Dick Grayson will take over until he is. In the event that he, too, is unavailable for any reason, the mantle goes to Tim Drake, after him, to Cassandra Cain, then Duke Thomas, then Stephanie Brown, then Jason Todd, should he accept it.”

In the video recording, Batman pauses, taking a deep breath.

“In the unfortunate event that the entire family is… deceased… I have a list of contingency plans on both the Bat-Computer and the Justice League’s primary databases. Oracle will help you access it, but in her… absence… the password is “a6ghr83kc02m”.”

Then video-Bruce takes off the cowl, his pale blue eyes looking straight into the camera.

“I know I was never the best with feelings. But I would like my children, my allies, and friends to know that I’m proud of you. And to my fellow Justice Leaguers… Diana and Clark, I am truly grateful for your companionship. I would never have made it this far without you. Barry, Arthur, Dinah, J’onn, you’ve all been good friends. Oliver, Hal… you’re not so bad either.”

Bruce turns around, and looks over his shoulder, the shadows of the Batcave making the scene even more dramatic.

“I wish you good luck.”

Then the clip ends.

A shuddering breath leaves Clark.

It’s real.

He’s really… They’re all…

He can’t do this anymore. He turns around and walks out the door, leaving the other core Justice Leaguers staring sombrely at the now-blank screen.

He doesn’t know when he started flying, when he started trying to escape. The walls of the Watchtower seem to be suffocating him, but he has enough sense not to just leave the airlock yet.

Instead he finds a corner by a window, far, far away from the others, where he can see a majestic view of Earth, the moon, and the Sun in perfect sync with each other.

He falls to his knees.

His breathing’s uneven, a tear rolls down his cheeks.

Then he feels a hand on his shoulder— soft, trembling, yet steady.

“Kal,” Diana whispers, sitting on the floor next to him. She doesn’t continue— she isn’t sure what to say.

“They’re all going to die, you know? We’re going to bury all of them. Everyone on Earth, everyone we know.” Clark’s voice trembles, in a way Superman’s never does. “It scares me so much.”

“Kal,” Diana says again, pulling Clark into a hug. “It’s okay. We’ve lost… We’ve lost so many of our friends. It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to grieve.”

“How are you— how are you so—” Clark can’t form his words properly. He turns to Diana, to see her face tight with grief, eyes misty with unshed tears.

Her voice breaks slightly as she speaks. “I don’t want to believe they’re gone. But… we have to carry on. We’re the Justice League. Our people need us, Kal.”

“So we just go on and on? Forever?” Another tear runs down his cheek. “Ollie, Hal, Dinah, Lois, Jon, they’re all going to… they’re all going to die one day and we just have to… to go on?”

“I’m sorry, but it is the truth,” Diana whispers, her eyes stinging with hot tears. “We must find peace in the fact, right now, that Batman— Bruce, the Robins, they— they were so brave. Brave till the end. And they fell as warriors, defending our world. I’m sure they’ll all reach Elysium.”

“And Dickie, Damian, Jason, Tim, Cass, Duke—” Clark’s voice is hoarse. “They were so young, just kids… I… I know Dick, Jay, Tim, Cass… they were adults, but… they’re gone, they’re gone…”

“They were heroes, like you and me. Don’t forget that.”

“I… I know, I just—” Another shuddering breath escapes Clark. “I just— I…”

“It’s okay,” Her voice is forcefully steady, but with an undertone of heartbreak. “It’s okay…”

Dinah looks around the room, her heart heavy.

Clark has left, Diana’s gone after him— both of them need their space, she knows. They were close to Bruce and the other Bats in a way no one else in this room was.

Was.

The word still weighs down on her.

Hal speaks up finally, breaking the deafening silence. “I always thought he hated me.”

No one replies for a long moment.

“I miss the kids,” Barry says finally, his voice quiet. “They were just… Robin was only 14. The others, even Nightwing, they had… they had their whole lives ahead of them.”

More silence.

“Jason, when he was Robin— do y'all remember? Kid was always my favorite,” Ollie says finally. “Was always so sassy. Roy loves him.”

Loves. Dinah winces, but doesn’t correct him. It’s easier to believe they’re just gone for a little while.

“Bruce was a good man,” Arthur adds. “They all were.”

“Tim was, I believe, the smartest,” J’onn says, somber. “It was his plan that allowed us to save Earth.”

“Damian!” Dinah says suddenly, jumping from her seat. “His… his mother. She shouldn’t have to find out from someone else.”

Everyone freezes, faces tight.

Dinah sighs, looking down. “I’ll do it.”

Then she leaves the room, dragging what feels like a heavy weight tied to her soul. She has to do this.

Roy’s sitting in a corner of his apartment, hugging his knees. All he can think of is Jason.

He’s never coming back.

He can still feel the lingering ‘goodbye’ kiss Jason gave him not two days ago, he can still hear him say, “I’ll be back before you know it, babe.”

He never came back.

He’s dead. Dead— dead dead dead DEAD DEAD—

“Small Red not okay?” A booming voice snaps Roy out of his thoughts. He looks up to see Bizarro’s pale blue skin and cold eyes looming over him. He’s crying. “Red him coming back.”

It takes Roy a second to register that Bizarro speaks backwards. It takes everything in him to not punch him for saying that, for giving him false hope.

He feels something he hasn’t felt in years— feels that whisper in his mind— one hit and it’ll all feel better. Just one hit.

NO! He screams mentally. He feels like bashing his head open.

Instead he lifts his dead eyes to survey the rest of the room— Kori’s on the couch, staring into space. Artemis has a crying Lian in her arms, she’s showing her something— old photos of Jason. Talking, whispering in a broken voice.

No, no he should be the one comforting Lian—

What’s he gonna say?

That— That Jason— That her Papa’s gone forever? That he’s never— he’s never coming back?

No— Jay— Jay deserved so much better, he— he already died once before, he’s been through so much, things were supposed to be better now— not— no, he’s—

Roy feels Bizarro sit beside him, gently patting his arm.

He snaps out of his thoughts again, turning to Jason’s former teammate, his eyes red-rimmed. His voice raw, he whispers, “Jay’s gone…”

Wally’s standing in the Hall of Heroes, staring up at the holographic projection of Dick— he looks so majestic, so mighty, staring ahead with nothing but hope and courage in his eyes.

Nothing like the cold, dead body that Wally held in his arms just two days ago.

He’s surrounded by his teammates, his friends— Kaldur, M’gann, Artemis, Zatanna, L’gann, Garth— yet he feels so alone.

He sees it again— Dick bleeding out it his arms, his wounds so fatal he died before help arrived. Wally’s the fastest man alive, damn it, yet he couldn’t even save his best friend— his boyfriend. He feels the moment when Dick’s breathing stopped, when his body went limp, when his grip on Wally’s hand loosened.

Everyone’s quiet. M’gann’s stress baking again, L’gann by her side. Artemis and Zatanna are sitting together, Garth’s lingering in a corner, and Kaldur’s standing right beside Wally— close enough for comfort but not so close he’s lurking. He’s shaking.

He can still hear it, hear Dick forcing out his last words, telling Wally it’s okay, that he loves him, that it’ll be fine.

It’s not fine. Not without you.

He wants to scream.

He wants to cry, yell, hit something, do anything.

But he can’t move.

So he just stands there, almost as still as the holographic projection of Dick before him.

Kon is left reeling.

Tim… Tim is…

Tim’s dead.

Tim’s really gone.

He thinks, for just a second, that this is how Tim and Cassie must have felt when he and Bart “died”.

Bart is sitting beside him on the couch, leaning on his side, Cassie’s got her head on his lap. Neither of them speak— Bart’s not even fidgeting— they’re all just trying to be there for each other.

The other Titans are up and about, but staying close for comfort. Jaime and Gar are making food for everyone in the kitchen, Raven and Vic have come back to the tower to make sure the others are okay, and he’s sure Karen’s around too, somewhere.

Yet he feels so empty.

Feels nothing at all.

How can he, when his best friend is dead?

Jon hasn’t spoken in a bit. Not when his Mom brought him his favorite soup, not when Grandma and Grandpa showed up to ‘help’ him and Dad through this, not when Krypto plopped down beside him to comfort him.

He hugs the dog close.

Krypto’s technically Kon’s, but Jon’s sure Kon wouldn’t mind if he stole Krypto for a day.

Another sob escapes him, and he buries his head in Krypto’s back. The dog whines, licking Jon’s hand.

He can’t believe Damian’s gone.

Really gone.

And he didn’t know just how much he would miss his friend.

Dinah finds Talia Al Ghul on a building in Metropolis, overlooking the city. Her face is tight with sorrow, but she keeps herself in check, her back straight, head held high.

She already knows, Dinah deduces.

“I… I’m sorry,” Dinah starts, unsure of what to say. She knows, from her experience as a psychologist, that ‘sorry’ is the last thing a grieving person wants to hear, but she doesn’t have anything else to say.

Talia doesn’t reply for a long time. Then she says, her voice numb, “I should have known, when bringing Damian into this life, that I would also be bringing him amidst the dangers that come with.”

Dinah’s brows furrow. “It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have done anything at all.”

“I should have trained him better, I should have kept him close, I should—” Talia takes a shuddering breath. “I should have never brought him into this life.”

Dinah can’t argue with that— she knows how Damian had come to be, and it… wasn’t the best birth ever.

“Now leave, hero,” Talia says, her voice numb and cold. “Go back to protecting the world. Leave me be.”

Dinah wants to say something better, comfort the woman, but she can’t. So she just turns back, and leaves.

By the time Harper Row makes her way to the Clock Tower, there’s already quite a crowd there— Kate, Renee Montoya, Harley, Ivy, Silena, and Helena Bertinili— they’re crowding around Babs, comforting her. Luke Fox and Isabella Ortiz are at the computer, looking through something.

Harper tries to open her mouth to speak, but she can’t get the words out.

She makes her way over to Luke and Izzy, shoulders hunched.

Just three days ago she’d been hanging out with Duke and Izzy and Cass and Steph— they’d all been so carefree, so happy…

And now…

Once she gets close enough she realizes Izzy’s crying, and immediately wraps her arms around the shorter girl. Harper’s trying to hold back tears of her own, too. She feels Luke putting a hesitant hand on her shoulder, squeezing tight.

No one speaks for a long time, they just stand together, seeking comfort in each other.

Then Babs rolls her wheelchair to the center of the room, wiping at her bloodshot eyes. But when she speaks, she sounds surprisingly steady. She’s compartmentalizing, Harper realizes. Putting away Barbara and bringing Oracle back.

“Gotham needs her heroes, now more than ever,” Oracle says, head held high. “We must honor our friends by doing the one thing they’d have wanted— to keep fighting. Keep Gotham safe.”

She sighs, her face tight to fight away tears. “Luke. Batman’s contingency plan, in the Robins’ absence, was to pass you the mantle of Batman. Do you accept?”

Luke’s eyes grow wide slightly, but he straightens himself, looking away. “I… I accept. Dad isn’t going to be happy, but… Gotham needs Batman.”

“Thank you.” Oracle nods at him. “As per Bruce’s will, all Wayne assets, the Manor, and the Batcave are split between Kate, me, Alfred, and Lucius. I… Lucius and I are still figuring out who’s going to take over Wayne Enterprises, but on the vigilante side, I’ve got a plan.”

She turns to Ivy, Harley, Kate, Silena and Helena. “The Birds of Prey are needed here, now more than ever. Dinah— Black canary has offered to help us with Gotham, too.”

Harley nods, sniffling. Beside her, Ivy speaks up, “The… Most Rogues aren’t happy about this. They’re not rampaging— Bane has fashioned his own version of the Batsuit, he’s going around ‘saving’ people, screaming that Batman never dies. The Joker’s searching for Lazarus Pits and Bruce’s body. Jervis Tetch and Nygma held a get-together yesterday, in the memory of the Bats. I… I think they might help us.”

Harper’s gotta admit, she’s quite surprised about this. Even Babs freezes, taking in this information.

“Gotham needs Robin as much as she needs Batman,” Izzy speaks up from beside her, her voice small but firm. “The Robins can come back, this time you can give us formal training so we can actually help.”

Oracle turns to Luke. “Taking on Robins is your decision, Batman.”

Luke winces at that title— it doesn’t feel like an honor to him, it just feels like an incessant reminder that he’s the last one left. Because his friends are dead. But he nods, anyway, not trusting himself to speak right now.

Then Oracle addresses Harper. “I… would you like to be Batgirl?”

Harper’s heart stops. Memories flash into her head— seeing Steph in the Batgirl costume, seeing Cass in the Batgirl suit, both of whom are now gone.

“N— No,” Harper stutters out, eyes tearful. “I can’t— I’m sorry, Babs. I appreciate the offer, but… Cass was Batgirl. I can’t take her place.”

“I understand.” Babs just nods, lips pursed, misty-eyed. “We will all need to work hand-in-hand until everything settles, we will need to be vigilant. Carry on Batman’s legacy, for as long as we may need to.”

No one speaks again.

They all just let it sink in, hearts heavy.

They’re going to have to do this alone now.

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adriswrld · 7 months

Text

Retirement » Jay White ⁰¹

plot: jay white finds out abt reader's potential retirement at wrestlekingdom 17

trope: friends to lovers / he fell first, but she fell harder

pairings: wrestler reader x jay white / reader x (platonic) bullet club

a/n: he's hubby your honor 🤝 reader used to be in bullet club when kenny was leader btw! atp, y'all should just expect to see my oc azalea playing the best friend 😭

THIS WILL HAVE TWO PARTS!! THIS IS PART ONE!

"How's your neck feeling?" Sean, Y/N's personal camera man had asked after turning on the camera and filming. As she and her best friend who is also a WWE wrestler shared a YouTube channel, they were filming an episode of Y/N experience for WrestleKingdom 17. "Well, my neck is literally killin' me so I hope that doesn't effect my match later cause if it does the blame could go on Kairi and I don't want that obviously. People tend to blame the opponent if the champion has a bad match." Y/N shrugged, picking up her phone to check the time.

"I'm gonna get freshened up and then we will be leaving soon to pick up Azalea from the airport. I showered last night so don't even try to say anything." Y/N said, pointing at the camera before Sean switched it off. "I'll be waiting in the lobby, Y/N." Sean said, heading to the door and Y/N gave a nod with a tired smile. Y/N rubbed her neck with a tired groan, still hating that retirement was in the rear view for her. But if she wanted to preserve her neck, she had no choice.

Two hours later, Y/N was standing in the airport with Sean, Mercedes and Trinity as they waited for Pamela (Bayley) and Azalea to arrive. "Are you okay? You keep rubbing your neck?" Mercedes asked in a concerned tone.

"Oh yeah I'm fine, just a bit sore." Y/N lied, glancing at Sean who already knew the truth but understood why she was keeping it a secret. Before anything else could be said, they noticed Pamela and Azalea jog over to them after grabbing their luggage. Azalea grinned and pulled Y/N into a hug, Sean getting it all on video. "I am running completely on energy drinks right now so I'm little jittery," she said.

"Oh it's alright, Iz." Y/N reassured and Azalea pulled away to greet Mercedes and Trinity. Pam smiled and pulled Y/N into a hug, "It's so good to see you again. How are you doing?" Pam asked, pulling away gently, almost as if she was trying to be careful with Y/N and that made Y/N think Izzy might have told her about her neck issues.

"I'm doing alright, thank you for asking. Just a bit exhausted but I'll be okay." Y/N said, giving Pam a reassuring smile. "I'm so sorry I won't be able to join you all, I've got lots of things I've got to do today, I really wish I could join all though. Maybe tomorrow I can join you," Y/N spoke as they had all been discussing where to eat.

"It's okay, Y/N, we understand. We'll be alright," Azalea reassured and the three women plus Sean nodded in agreement with her. "All right. Just be careful, and have fun," Y/N said, hugging Izzy goodbye before gesturing for Sean to come on with her.

"It's probably just me but am I the only one noticing how much her moods changed? Like, she's not as happy and cheerful like she's always been, plus she keeps rubbing her neck like somethings wrong," Mercedes spoke as they walked towards the exit together. Azalea sighed and stopped everyone, causing them to all turn to look at her. "Don't tell anyone this but, ever since she broke her neck, she hasn't exactly fully recovered yet," Izzy explained.

"But the doctors said she was cleared?" Trinity added in confusion.

"She was, but a few weeks ago she started getting really bad neck pain so we went to the doctors and they said something was wrong. They said she was cleared but when she started wrestling it appeared that she didn't fully heal. It's actually extremely dangerous for her to still be wrestling. It's kinda like what happened with Paige's neck. It's why she was so urgent on dropping the title to you." Pam, Mercedes and Trinity were all to shocked and concerned to even speak.

"Does that mean she's retiring?" Pam questioned.

"Look, I'm not saying that she's retiring, but it's definitely in the near future for her. She obviously doesn't want to, but it's what's best for her health." Azalea corrected with a small shrug. She was the last person who wanted Y/N to retire but Y/N's health was more important than that. At least she got to say she had the greatest match of her career with her best friend.

"That does explain why she hasn't been in the happiest of moods," Mercedes mumbled sadly.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

"I called my very good friend Okada to help me out for my match yesterday but I just got off the phone with him and unfortunately he couldn't make it. But, as we are already here, I figured why not just train with Sean," Y/N said and Sean smiled. "It's gonna be a pain but I could use the training," Sean agreed and Y/N chuckled and nodded in agreement.

"It's supposed to be closed as of now but I was given a key a long time ago in case I ever needed it. So, let's go inside." Y/N smiled as she unlocked the doors and entered the building. As they walked in it appeared the lights were already on so someone must've already been there. "Oh it looks like someone's already here," Y/N said quietly.

They could hear voices and Y/N couldn't help but find those very familiar. She could pick out El Phantasmo and Jay White's voice anywhere. "I knew I heard my boys," Y/N grinned as the two men both turned to look at her, immediately growing smiles once they saw her. "No way, is it the one and only Bullet Club Princess?" ELP aka Riley grinned and slid out of the ring, walking towards Y/N with open arms.

"Aye, former BC Princess. Not anymore." Y/N playfully corrected as she ran into his open arms. "Oh come on, you'll always be the BC Princess." Riley playfully nudged her once they pulled away and he shook Sean's hand with a polite grin.

Jay sat on the ring, a small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips as he watched Y/N walk towards him. "Still a cocky lil shit, aren't you? Not gonna come and greet me like a gentleman?" Y/N joked, getting Jay to crack a small laugh as he jumped down and let Y/N bring him into a small hug. "Nice to see you again, princess." Jay mumbled into her hair causing her to mentally freak out but she held her usual chill composure.

"Mmm, nice to see you too, Jamie." Y/N pulled away and Jay threw her arm around her, pulling her into his side like it was a normal interaction. "You know you can still call me Jay, right?" Jay raised his brows, still obviously confused on why she used his real name. "Nah, I like Jamie," Y/N winked, flashing a smile, he shook his head in amusement and didn't argue with that.

"So, what are you guys doing here anyways?" Riley questioned, choosing not to tease Jay for his crush on Y/N.

"I originally was suppose to train with Okada this morning to prepare for my match but he got busy so he had cancel. Figured I'd just train with Sean," Y/N informed, crossing her arms over her chest. Sean nodded, confirming her statement as he held the camera. "You can join us then, Riley was helping me train for my match with Okada anyways." Jay offered, Riley also agreeing with him.

"Sounds good." Y/N accepted.

Sean and Riley trained in one ring as Jay and Y/N were training together in the other ring. Riley was helping Sean improve in his wrestling so that was a huge help for him. "I haven't figured out how I wanted the match to finish, you know? All I know is that I really want to pay a tribute to Kenny and Azalea in the match, but I already figured that out," Y/N said to Jay as they discussed how she wanted her match to go with Kairi Sane.

Jay licked the front of his teeth, wondering if Y/N was still involved with Kenny. "Oh, uh are you and Kenny still, ya know?" Y/N's eyes widened slightly, knowing where he was going with that and immediately shook her head. "Definitely not, we ended things in like early 2019. We're still extremely good friends though, he's always been one of my biggest supporters." Y/N pursed her lips, silently wondering why Jay asked about Kenny. "Why?" She questioned.

"Just wondering," Jay shrugged it off but Y/N was still a bit suspicious.

"Well, we should continue now, I want to be at the dome early," Y/N said, getting back on track. "Yeah of course." Y/N stood up from sitting on the middle rope, "Can I borrow the blade runner?"

"I'm not sure, you technically never joined my bullet club," Jay pursed his lips sarcastically and Y/N hit his shoulder playfully with a laugh. "You turned on Kenny, how could I possibly join your club without it seeming like I'm betraying him?" Y/N pointed out as she circled him.

"Easy. You could've just chose me. I would've treat you better anyways." Jay said, adding a little truth to his words. Y/N glanced down in thought, thinking into what he said.

"All right, let's get back to it."

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

"Oh my god, your hair looks so beautiful, what the fuck," Y/N spoke as she entered the room Mercedes was in. "You like it?" Mercedes smiled, pulling Y/N into a side hug but being careful with her neck. "I love it. It looks amazing on you. It's like you burning the blue hair, putting that in your past and opening a new chapter as Mercedes, yeah?" Y/N asked. "Dude you got it perfectly. Yes, that's exactly what it means."

"I'm gonna get goin' but you call me if you need anything sweets." Y/N said, patting Mercedes's shoulder. "I will, thank you."

Y/N walked out of the room with her suitcase, going towards her personal locker room to drop her suitcase and bags off. "All right, now we are going to go search for the lovely Azalea who I'm sure is around here somewhere. She said she was by the ring since we last texted." Alice spoke, her hands tucked into her pockets of her joggers as Sean followed her with the camera.

"It's so amazing being here again. All the memories I've had here is just so surreal to me. It's gonna really hurt when I perform here for the last time. I'm just glad it's gonna be against Kairi. She's one of my greatest friends." Y/N and Sean both walked down to the ring, immediately did she spot Azalea talking with surprisingly, Jay White. She knew they never even met each other so that was kinda a shock to her seeing them in a deep conversation.

As Y/N walked up to them, Jay turned to look at her, "Why didn't you tell me you're retiring?"

Y/N blinked, being caught off guard with the sudden question. Y/N looked at Azalea with accusing eyes, "I'm sorry babe, but he was asking me why you always looked like you were in pain when you trained. He's really convincing, I'm sorry." Azalea frowned, suddenly feeling bad for telling Jay what was going on when Y/N trusted her with that information.

Y/N sighed, running a hand down her face exhaustion. "I'm not retiring, okay? We don't even know that for sure. Doctors just said that my wrestling days are limited if it keeps getting worse," Y/N explained. "Then why are you wrestling tonight if you know it can end your career? Are you insane, Y/N? Just drop the title before you permanently damage your neck." Jay argued, not understanding why she wasn't listening to everyone's warnings.

"I can't!" Y/N snapped, then taking a few breaths to calm herself down before she got even more upset and said something she might regret. "This is my legacy, Jay. This is my story and if I'm gonna go out, it's gonna be on my terms. Whether it ends tonight or next month, it's on my terms. You can hate me for it all you want, but it's my decision. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go see my friends cause it might be a while before we see each other again." Y/N plastered on a fake smile and walked past them to go find Okada.

Jay ran a hand down his hair, frustrated but also hurt that Y/N wasn't at least making an effort to preserve her career. "You're in love with her, aren't you?" Izzy tilted her head curiously, making Jay immediately turn to look at her. "Where did you get that idea from?" Jay scoffed in denial.

"Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that you seem to care about her more than you're letting on. And, I've watched her old YouTube videos of her backstage with the Bullet Club and I couldn't help but notice everytime she was with Kenny, you always held that jealous glint in your eyes. She even told me how you tried to convince her to join your bullet club. It was so insanely obvious. You're kinda lucky she's a little oblivious." Azalea smiled sarcastically as Jay rolled his eyes.

"Fine, maybe you're right. But, don't tell her, I plan on telling her myself, tonight." Jay stuck out his hand so they could shake on it, it took her a moment to think before ultimately shaking his hand in agreement.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Y/N paced back and forth nervously, her title strapped around her waist as she watched the TV where Kairi Sane was making her entrance. "You can do this, just go out there, don't fall, don't be stiff, show everyone why you're the best. Do what you do best, win, wrestle and entertain." Y/N spoke to herself, trying her hardest to motivate herself but she was failing miserably, growing more anxious by the second.

"Hey, Y/N. Are you okay?" Jay walked up to them and Sean took it as a sign to let the two talk alone.

"Do I honestly look okay?" Y/N deadpanned then frowned, not liking when she came off as rude. "I'm sorry, that was rude. I'm just freaking out, or panicking or something, I don't know," Y/N rambled, breathing heavily, she leaned on the wall behind her.

"Shit, okay I was gonna do this later," Jay mumbled to himself before placing his hands on her shoulders and her hands went up to his arms. "What are you?-" Jay cut her off, pressing his lips gently against hers, in the process, distracting her from all her previous thoughts. Y/N practically melted into the kiss, immediately placing her hands on his, she kissed back. Hearing her music begin to play, they both pulled away and before she could get a word out, one of the workers dragged her away and up the stairs.

"What happened to waiting till after the show?" Jay jumped slighly hearing Azalea's voice, turning around he noticed her leaning against the wall with crossed arms. "I was trying to calm her down," Jay defended.

"Dude, you realized that literally could destroy her entire focus on the match? You better hope nothing bad happens, if it does, I'm kicking your ass," Azalea stated before walking off to go watch the match with Trinity and Pamela in the stands where they couldn't be caught on any cameras as it went against hers and Pam's contracts with the WWE.

"Shit," Jay muttered, running a hand down his hair.

》* 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 。* 。° 。* 。 • ˚《

Y/N took a deep breath, trying to get a breath in as she just superplexed Kairi off the top rope and immediately performed a Blade Runner after. The match was almost over and it was one hell of a match. Kairi was killing it and some even thought she might actually just pull a win over the champion. But, Y/N wasn't gonna let that happen. She had to admit, the kiss was a little distracting. It was just so sudden and unexpected. She didn't even think Jay was single after seeing those rumors about him with a new girlfriend.

Y/N crawled over to Kairi, attempting a cover but Kairi kicked out at two. "Fuck! Just give up!" Y/N leaned against the ropes, running a hand over her hair in frustration.

Kairi stood up tiredly and immediately ran and knee'd Y/N before she could block it. She dragged Y/N to the turnbuckles and began to climb up the rope. The crowd automatically assumed it was over for Y/N the minute Kairi hit the insane elbow. But, as Kairi performed it, Y/N got her knees up at the last second. Kairi groaned and Y/N stood up and jumped onto the top rope, performing her finisher, the Royalty Deathdrop. It was basically a backflip off the top rope into a DDT.

She hit it perfectly. "ONE..TWO..THREE!" Y/N grinned and tiredly crawled to the bottom rope, attempting to pull herself up as they announced her name as the winner. The official handed her the title and raised her hand before she immediately collapsed back onto the mat, barely able to hold herself up. Her body was battered and bruised so it was surprising that she wasn't even unconscious.

Kairi stood up and immediately went towards Y/N, extending her hand in respect towards her competitor. The crowd watched in anticipation, waiting to see if Y/N would accept her hand. Y/N hesitantly took Kairi's hand and the crowd applaused. Kairi pulled the taller woman up and raised her hand, showing a sign of respect for the retaining champion.

All until Y/N's hand dropped, the music hit. The music of Mercedes Moné.

The crowd cheered, obviously most knowing who she was. Y/N sat down on the middle turnbuckle, watching as Mercedes ascended down the entrance ramp. Kairi stood near Y/N as they watched Mercedes enter the ring. A whole new look on her, she was almost unrecognizable if you seen her as Sasha Banks in WWE. This was an entirely different woman and she wasn't here to play games. She was here to make history, money and win championships.

Kairi looked at Y/N silently asking if she wanted her to stay. Y/N shook her head, waving her off and Kairi stepped out of the ring, letting Y/N handle her business. Y/N stepped up, not liking the disrespect of Mercedes. She didn't have to say anything, she just raised her IWGP Women's Championship right in the face of Mercedes, not backing down to her.

Mercedes stuck her hand out, Y/N looking at it in suspicion. She took it hesitantly and Mercedes smiled as they shook hands. A show of respect. Y/N went to pull her hand away but Mercedes held it tightly so she couldn't let go. She pulled Y/N in, making her drop the title and performed what looked to be a gory bomb only it was straight into a DDT. Y/N groaned as she hit the mat, selling it perfectly so it made Mercedes look like a huge threat.

Mercedes walked over to the title and slowly picked it up, then dropped it onto Y/N's barely conscious body. "Give me a mic," Mercedes stuck her hand out, leaning between the ropes, they quickly handed her a microphone and she slowly made her way back to Y/N.

"Y/N, awee, congratulations on making history tonight, once again. I also know a thing or two about making history," Mercedes grinned, the crowd cheering for her. "I am here, in New Japan and Stardom to make some more. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm the standard. The conversation. The blueprint, and the CEO of this women's division."

Mercedes kneeled down next to Y/N's body, the champion not even attempting to get up or open her eyes. "So Y/N-San, enjoy your IWGP Women's Championship while you can. Because at Battle in the Valley at San José. Imma leave you bankrupt bitch. And you can bank on Moné." Mercedes took the championship and lifted it up, throwing the mic to the side as her music played.

Y/N rolled out of the ring once Mercedes made her way out. She grabbed her championship and let one of the officials help her walk to the back. She held an ice pack against her neck, as Azalea rushed up towards her and Sean obviously shortly behind with the camera. "I need to lay down," Y/N spoke, letting Azalea help her walk towards her locker room rather than run to do the press conference. They could hold it back a few minutes for Y/N like they always did.

"I love you, but you need to chill out with these extreme matches. If this next one is your last, don't hurt yourself worse trying to prove yourself. You had thousands of people watching you tonight, I'm pretty damn sure they know you're the best." Azalea said, handing the title to Sean for him to hold it until they got to the room.

"I know, I'm sorry. I'll take it down a notch next time. Sean, you can turn off the camera, I don't wanna film right now." Y/N leaned her head on Azalea's shoulder in exhaustion, not seeing that Jay was standing outside her locker room door. But, Azalea and Sean noticed him.

"I'm gonna go get the ice, lots of ice," Sean excused himself, leaving Azalea to deal with that by herself.

"I need to unlock the door so I need you to hold yourself up for a few seconds, okay?" Azalea slowly moved Y/N's arm from her shoulder and instead of Y/N supporting herself, Jay immediately went to hold her up. Y/N looked at him and sighed, watching tiredly as Azalea hurriedly unlocked the door to the locker room.

"You're probably gonna need a cat scan," Azalea mumbled, opening the door and Jay helped Y/N inside. Azalea switched on the lights as Jay helped Y/N lay down on the couch. "After the amount of neck bumps she took, I'm surprised she didn't break it," Jay added. Azalea pursed her lips, agreeing with him and Y/N tiredly hit his shoulder. "Don't be an ass. I had to make it look like it was killing me," Y/N muttered.

"I'm pretty sure it was killing you considering you can barely stand on your own," Azalea deadpanned.

Y/N rolled her eyes and moved the ice pack from her neck to her forehead. "The match looked good though, yeah?" Despite her current situation, she still loved wrestling and absolutely loved being out there in front of an audience. Nothing could ever take away her love and passion for the sport. Retirement or not. She would always appreciate it.

"You never had one bad match and it hasn't changed yet," Jay spoke before Azalea could respond to her friend. As Y/N went to say something, the door opened and in walked Sean with the ice packs and Mercedes. "Got the ice, and a visitor," Sean tossed the ice to Izzy who caught it with ease before he grabbed the camera and turned it back on.

"Hey, I didn't see you backstage so I got worried. And I noticed you could barely walk so I wanted to come check on you." Mercedes kneeled down next to the couch as Jay moved out of the way for her. Y/N sat up slowly, still trying to control her breathing. "You didn't have to, but I appreciate it. How are you feeling?" Y/N smiled, taking Mercedes's hands in her own.

"I feel like I'm on top of the world. This is all I've ever wanted and honestly, I'm still processing it all. In a way, I finally feel free, ya know?" Mercedes smiled as she spoke, still running on adrenaline from her debut. It completely took her mind off the fact that she was possibly gonna be the one to retire Y/N at Battle in the Valley.

"I understand completely. I'm literally so proud of you, I could cry. You deserve to live your dream, you deserve all of this. Don't let anyone tell you different. You belong here." Y/N stated, being filled with nothing but joy for Mercedes. She couldn't have been more proud of her.

Mercedes smiled, feeling a tear fall that Y/N wiped away. "Thank you so much. For everything." Mercedes said, blinking away her tears.

"You don't have to thank me. Just show me who Mercedes Moné is, and that's all I need." Mercedes chuckled and nodded, being gentle as she hugged Y/N. "I can't wait to beat you," Mercedes teased, pulling away with a smirk.

"All right, don't get all cocky now." Y/N scoffed lightly in a joking manner.

Mercedes snickered and stood back up, now turning her attention to Jay as Y/N leaned forward for Azalea to press the ice against her bag. "I don't think we've met yet. I'm Mercedes, it's nice to meet you," Mercedes smiled humbly as she stuck out her hand.

"Jay, it's nice to meet you as well. I've heard great things," Jay shook her hand gently with a warm smile.

"Well, I should get going. Imma let you rest and we'll meet up tomorrow?" Mercedes said towards Y/N. "Sure thing," Y/N nodded. Mercedes and Azalea shared a hug before she exited the locker room.

"You two have five minutes, then you need to do the conference and we can go back to the hotel or finish watching the show. I'm sure you don't wanna miss Kenny and Will's match." Azalea said before grabbing Sean and exiting the room to let the two discuss the elephant in the room.

Y/N cleared her throat, and patted her hand on the couch, telling Jay to sit down. His sigh was barely heard as he took a seat next to the woman he'd been in love with since their first interaction. "I'm sorry I kissed you. I definitely shouldn't have done that without your consent, that was extremely out of line," he began, causing Y/N to turn her body towards him, groaning at the pain in the process. She had never been so sore in her life. That was another reminder that she had to hang up the boots sooner than later.

"I'm not mad that you kissed me, Jamie." Y/N cut him off, using her left hand to move his face to look at her. "You're not?" Jay feigned confusion, being so sure that she was upset with him. After all, she hadn't spoken to him until Azalea left, which kinda forced them to have to talk.

"No. I'm mad that you didn't do it sooner," Y/N said, catching Jay off guard completely. Jay blinked, not sure if he heard that right or if his mind was playing games on him. "I can't tell if you're serious or not. Can you repeat that again?" He asked, being serious but not at the same time.

Y/N chuckled but stopped when she felt the pain in her stomach. "Look, I've always liked you, from the minute we met. But I wasn't in love with you," Jay's face fell hearing that but she placed her hand on his, silently telling him to keep listening. "I was so obsessed with thinking Kenny was the one for me because I genuinely never experienced love before him. I told myself so many times that he was the person I've always wanted when in reality, he wasn't at all."

"Then when we broke up and a month later I came back to Japan, you and I met up and I finally realized what was in front of my face the entire time. You always cared about me, and checked in after every match and that's something nobody else even bothered to do. You treated me exactly like I thought Kenny would. And I'm so sorry for realizing that way too late. I've always loved you, and when I found out you had a girlfriend, it was too late to tell you that I was in love with you."

Y/N wiped a tear that fell from her cheek, never being a fan of crying even if it was a happy tear. Jay furrowed his brows in confusion, processing what she just said, "I'm sorry, did you say girlfriend?" He questioned.

"Yeah, why? There was reports on Twitter that you had some secret girlfriend or whatever," Y/N shrugged. Jay couldn't help but chuckle, making Y/N raise her brows, not knowing if she should be mad or not. "Y/N, those were fake. That girl I was with was not my girlfriend. Riley and Will tricked me into going out with her. They said it was a guys night and when I show up, they're not even there and she just got caught in the middle of their jokes so I felt bad and just had dinner with her anyways. I don't even remember her name." Jay said, sighing when he realized he could've had Y/N much sooner.

"Oh." Was all she could say.

Jay noted her embarrassment and gave a squeeze to her hand, "I really wish I could go back in time and tell you how much I loved you way sooner. I could've had you this whole time."

"Well, there's no need to wait anymore," Y/N spoke softly, hoping he got the hint. Jay leaned closer towards her, careful with her body as of how sore she definitely was. "Can I kiss you, Y/N?" Y/N smiled and nodded, "Of course you can, Jay," letting him press his lips softly against hers. The kiss wasn't rushed like the first one. It was perfect. It was...everything.

Jay pulled away with a cheesy smile, "You called me Jay," he pointed out. Y/N rolled her eyes and playfully pushed him back, "Shut up, Jamie," she scoffed. Jay grinned and pulled her onto his lap, mumbling small sorrys when she winced. "I love you, Y/N," he spoke softly.

"I love you too, Jamie," Y/N pressed a small peck to his lips.

#jay white #jay white fanfiction #jay white imagine #jay white x reader #switchblade jay white #aew imagine #aew fanfiction #kenny omega #bullet club

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run-me-through-but-not-like-that · 1 year

Note

I’m just going to leave this here and disappear…

Izzy Hands x g!n reader prompt:

“Do you think you’re being cute?” Izzy sneered at the smirking member of Bonnet’s crew across the table from him.

The crew member’s smirk got wider.

“If you want the truth,” they started and leaned onto the table to bring their face closer to his. “I’m actually adorable.”

The kitchen was quiet at they stared each other down in a battle of wills.

“Well,” Izzy roamed his eyes over their face and body before meeting their gaze again, a corner of his lip twitching up. “You’re right about that.”

Their face went blank and turned bright red, realizing what he said. Their plan to rile Izzy up backfired and they didn’t know how to respond, their mind empty of all thoughts.

All the while Izzy Hands was grinning smugly.

I think Izzy should get to be a little confident and flirt sometimes. As a treat.

Sidenote: I had this saved in my drafts as "Izzy flirts and wins for once"

Actually Adorable:

The galley was more hushed than it usually was. It was normally filled with chatter, arguments, laughter, but not often filled with semi-awkward conversation as everyone did their best to ignore the thing that was out of place. Izzy didn’t often eat with the rest of the crew, only from time to time when the mood apparently struck. It wasn’t a big deal, really. He would just take his plate or bowl, sit, eat, and then leave. He barely contributed to any talk, and only when he was addressed directly or something said something that he found particularly moronic.

This evening, Izzy was begrudgingly sitting at the bench eating his upper. Of course, you had sat opposite him as soon as you saw him, your plate clattering a little as you haphazardly dropped it down. Despite his apparent distaste for conversation, you attempted it.

Started simple, of course. About the ship, about your day, an anecdote here and there. He didn’t really respond, looking more intrigued about your determination to speak with him than in what you were actually saying.

“Really committed to this ‘sexy and mysterious’ thing, aren’t you?” you asked, your voice slightly suggestive but mostly amused. Maybe even fond.

“Excuse me?” Izzy cocked an eyebrow at you, his lip turning up in annoyance when he sensed the other crew members fading out their conversations and glancing over at the two of you.

“It’s admirable, honestly, and I won’t lie, I’m kinda into it,” you shrugged, not shying away from his glare. You held his gaze, a smirk on your lips.

“Do you think you’re being cute?” Izzy sneered at you.

His response only had your smirk growing wider.

“If you want the truth,” you braced your elbows on the table, leaning across and closer to him. “I actually think I’m adorable.”

The galley was fully silent then, tension bubbling as they watched the two of you staring each other down. Izzy hadn’t backed away like you thought he might, hadn’t snapped just yet.

“Well,” Izzy let his gaze roam over your face and body shamelessly, not caring who noticed, before meeting your gaze again. You braced yourself for the blow, the insult he was bound to spit at you. You wouldn’t take it to heart, it would be coming from a defensive place rather than any real malice, that’s what you told yourself anyway.

Then the corner of his mouth twitched up, something like an imitation of a smirk. His shoulders relaxed and he copied the way you lent over the table, bringing his face even closer to yours. “You’re right about that,” he surprised you with a breezy ease.

Izzy was pleased with your reaction as his words sank in. Your smirk dropped, expression turning blank before your eyes widened slightly and your face heated up. You had expected him to snap and snarl, to at least scoff at you for your advances. You had a whole plan, a whole script for how this was meant to go, but he had thrown you off completely.

You tried to find something to say, to shoot back your own flirty response but you couldn’t get your mind to actually function. Like every thought you had just flew out of your skull the moment Izzy gave you that smirk.

Clearly amused by your reaction, Izzy’s expression turned smug as his gaze scanned your face again. In a feeble attempt to speak, you parted your lips, but that was as far as you got. Any retort getting caught in your throat.

“Jimerez, you’re on watch tonight. Don’t forget,” Izzy pushed himself away from the table and stood up, still looking fairly pleased with himself as he left the galley. As if he hadn’t just shifted your entire sense of reality.

You just blinked at the doorway as he disappeared. Had you hit your head? Did you have a fever and were hallucinating?

Almost frantic, you turned to the rest of the crew. They were already looking at you. “You all saw that, right?” you asked, needing somebody to corroborate what you had just experienced and ensure you that you weren’t losing your mind.

“Does Izzy Hands kinda have…game?” Pete asked nobody in particular, looking baffled, maybe the slightest bit impressed.

“That was surprisingly smooth. For him, y’know?” Frenchie agreed but was seeking some sort of corroboration just like you and Pete.

“Ugh, Luce, stop looking at me like that,” you huffed. While the others looked most surprised, confused, and amused, Lucius was just grinning at you.

“Izzy Hands just flirted with you, in front of everyone!” If you hadn’t been needing someone else to say it, you would have rolled your eyes at him. Annoyingly, you strangely appreciated his recap.

“Yeah…not very like him,” Wee John contemplated.

That immediately put Frenchie on edge. “You don’t think he’s possessed for something, do you?”

“Definitely possessed. We should perform an exorcism,” Roach was a little too quick to agree. “Might have to get pretty violent,” he hummed, not sounding worried about it in the slightest. “Jim, you could probably do it, right?”

“Fucking hell,” Jim rolled their eyes, then muttered something in spanish that made Oluwande chuckle to himself.

“He’s not possessed, mate,” Ivan assured, patting Frenchie on the shoulder.

“Yeah. Never seen it myself but the Captain has insisted that Izzy used to flirt,” Fang told them.

“Mental,” Lucius was still smiling, bright and amused. “So…gonna go for it?” he turned his attention back to you.

“Yeah, duh,” as if you even had to think about it. “I mean, I didn’t think he’d actually be interested but if he is…this changes everything.” If Izzy Hands was really interested in you, you were going to go for it.

“Well, go on then,” Pete encouraged, shooing at you.

“Now?” your eyes widened as you looked between your crew mates.

“Oh yeah, definitely now,” Roach nodded, not even bothering to suppress his smile. Something told you he didn’t really care whether you were successful or not, he just wanted the show either way. Thriving on the chaos.

“Go!” Pete shooed again, grinning widely.

“And let us know if he’s showing any other signs of possession!” Frenchie added seriously.

“And give us the details!” Roach grinned sharper, only laughing when Frenchie elbowed him.

You rolled your eyes at them but stood from the bench a little too eagerly.

“Go get your man!” Lucius whooped.

“Fuck off, Lucius!” you called as you left the galley, on your way to find the first mate.

As you turned the corner, you bumped right into something. Something you were sure wasn’t usually there. You stumbled back slightly, regaining your footing, and focused enough to see Izzy smirking back at you.

“Done gossiping?” he asked, though he didn’t really sound all that frustrated.

“You, uh…heard all of that?” you asked carefully.

“They’re loud enough,” Izzy shrugged. He really was possessing an ease you didn’t know he was capable of, he was always so uptight.

“Sorry,” you apologised, scratching the back of your neck awkwardly.

“You’re fine,” Izzy assured you casually, truly looking unbothered about it.

Apparently he had waited out here for you, knowing you would follow him out, but he was giving you nothing to really work with.

“So…you think I’m cute?” you asked, managing some sort of smoothness now that you had time to gather your thoughts.

“I’ve already told you that you are, stop fishing,” Izzy rolled his eyes but his mouth twitched fondly in some close approximation of a smile. “Get some rest, I’ll see you in the morning,” his politeness threw you off again.

Why had he lingered outside of the galley just to dismiss you? “Yeah, see you in the morning, Izzy,” you smiled anyway, willing to play by his rules at least for now.

Izzy placed a hand on your shoulder and squeezed ever so slightly as he walked past you, leaving towards his cabin. Once again, you were just watching him leave.

Where had this man come from?

You were excited to get more acquainted with this side of Izzy, a more personal side. Plus, you were pleased that Izzy might be becoming more comfortable aboard the Revenge and among the crew. And if that comfort just happened to mostly be directed at you, well…you didn’t have a problem with that.

#israel hands x reader #izzy hands x reader #izzy hands #ofmd izzy #ofmd x reader #our flag means death izzy

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faejilly · 1 year

Text

so I wanted to riff off of @alexanderlightweight's response to the Alec/Bow/Quiver/summoning meta post by @ralfstrashcan that I reblogged recently, but also I didn't want it to get lost in an increasingly long reblog chain, so I'm gonna quote and start over here:

100%

my headcanon is that it's alec's shadowhunter ability like clary's rune ability and apparently the herondale ghost talking ability(??)

if we really want to take it a step further. we can even talk about how izzy has specially made weapons that have to be super tricky to use which means weapons ability

but that's just my brain. which made that one scene where alec goes back to the institute make no sense, to retrieve his bow because literally every other time he doesn't need to (they just wanted to give clace the training moment and set up the whole hodge thing)

1: I also think Alec's 'have to go get a bow' is just an excuse, but he's using it to a) get away from Jace behaving incomprehensibly & Clary being So Very Clary, AND b) to cover their tracks now that he's realized just HOW comprehensively his siblings are going to go off the rails in the next day or so. (And on a narrative level I really like the scene with Hodge so I'm glad it exists. 😅)

2: I headcanon that part of the reason Alec (& to a lesser extent but still noticeably so, Izzy) can get away with pushing so many Clave/Nephilim boundaries without actually getting deruned despite their parents being on Thin Fucking Ice™️ with well, everyone, is that they have inherited both Family Traits and that's valuable enough (especially after all the losses during and after the Uprising) that the Clave really really doesn't want to get rid of them.

(Similarly, there's some hope that Jace and/or his expected children might show signs of the Wayland traits coming to life again as they've died out otherwise. Obviously that goes a bit sideways once they finally pick up on How Very Herondale he is, but luckily he's Herondale so that's still a benefit.)

Truebloods: very literally truth-tellers. Variations on their skills include the ability to recognize lies, off the charts charisma when they are invoking what they believe to be the truth, and an ability to make the most awkward truths palatable to audiences that normally wouldn't want to engage with them. They were traditionally the guardians of the Soul Sword whenever it left the City of Bones, but that honor faded away over the years as the Council with the Consul/Inquisitor as heads centralized power in their own hands.

Izzy can be seen doing this during her trial, because even when her personal behavior has included digs & microaggressions against Downworlders, she believes that they as a people can and should do better and her speech clearly works in-universe because of that resonance of truth.

(She even occasionally manages the sincere/heart-felt clunky dialogue that works despite being clunky that Alec's so good at, and poor Jace doesn't, despite his best attempts, because for all he's a Lightwood in every other way that matters, he's not actually part Trueblood.)

Maryse has several hints of Alec's same blunt (inexplicably successful) sincerity once she lets herself stop hiding behind Politics & Expectations. When she's upset with Izzy about spending time with the Seelie in s1, she has a line that always felt very self-recriminating to me; (I'm paraphrasing here since I'm too lazy to pull up the script or episode): 'never trust a people who can't lie, they'll find more imaginative ways to stab you in the back'. She knows this about the Seelie because it's what she's always done.

(Alec's shock at his parents being in the Circle can't be because it's against their politics as they've never really tried to behave better. Perhaps it's because it never occurred to him that they could lie that well. Especially his mother, since he has a much better relationship with her than Robert.)

This means that Maryse buying into Valentine's rhetoric was invaluable to him, because she could back him up and help make sure people would fall for it, because she was a Trueblood. Equally, when she turns, that is part of why the Clave lets them back in. Her vow to now toe the party line is completely believable, because she promised on her children... who are also Truebloods.

This also means that their bloodline is one that would not always be popular since they can call out power when it's behaving badly; thus the apparent decline of Trueblood standing in the way that the show refuses to ever really acknowledge it in the present day timeline, and instead talks about Lightwood honor.

(But countered in the way The Clave doesn't move directly against Alec Lightwood, HotI, despite gay and living with a Downworlder, despite how much clear disdain he has for so many of them and their policies. They aren't willing to risk what a Trueblood could do if pushed into active rebellion.)

Lightwoods have a much more palatable martial gift. Their affinity for the adamas in their weapons means they can bond with them, sometimes strongly enough to summon them, manipulate them in the field, adapt them and rune them and enhance them in ways most Shadowhunters can't. (We never see anyone doing anything resembling Alec runing his arrows in s1 after all. What if most of them can't?)

As shown by Izzy in s3 as Weapon's Master, in Alec's ability to beat his parabatai (the supposed best fighter of a generation) when they're sparring with weapons even if he loses once they get to hand-to-hand, Izzy's unique skill with a whip, Alec fighting with everything he gets his hands on, from seraph blades to his signature bow to actual arrows for stabbing. (As seen in everything in ralf's original meta post and delightful fic.)

There's even something in the fact that Izzy was interested in joining the Iron Sisters (which while prestigious also involves even more sacrifice from a people who have to sacrifice a lot already and are thus vital enough that they let Cleophas join despite her past because they needed her) and yet Izzy stayed active duty -- and presumably eventually marriageable.

(I frequently wonder if part of why she chose to make herself as unpalatable as possible for a traditional/political match was a lingering bit of awareness that that was what The Clave most wanted from her, regardless of who she wanted to be.)

ALSO! There has to be a reason that Robert Lightwood was valuable enough to keep even when they got rid of Maryse, a reason the show reiterates Lightwood honor over and over again, a reason he & Maryse got to be co-Heads of an Institute (even if the general fanon that they were more constrained than most Proper Heads does fit what little we see), and we never actually see Robert fighting or sparring, but we are repeatedly told that his children are the best of the best.

But it's seldom mentioned as a compliment, is it? More like an expectation. They're Lightwoods, they have to be the best with their weapons, or what is the point of them? It's just another weight added to Alec's so-called crown, another expectation Izzy has to both flaunt and fight against every day so she can have at least a little bit of herself left to hold onto.

(The one thing Jace is good at, the one bit of the monster his father built that helps; he's as good with a blade as a Lightwood. It's the only thing that gives him hope for redemption, the only thing that gives him enough conviction to ask Alec to be his parabatai and protect his soul from himself.)

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tallowfallow · 2 years

Text

Steddyhands Prompt:

A little bird with a cute kerchief has let Edward and Stede in on a little (incredibly well known) secret: Izzy is in love with Edward. After a little soul-searching and a lot of reassuring kisses, the captains begin a new mission. Mission: Make Izzy Our Boyfriend. (Edward calls it 'Operation Miob' which is pronounced 'me-ob'. Stede does not approve and believes they should spell out the initials each time)

Which at first goes great, even if Izzy is a little confused on why his distant captain and bastard other captain are spending so much time with him. He even starts... well, he doesn't want to say enjoy because really, who can enjoy hours of tea parties and reminiscing on the old times and play-fighting? Izzy can.

No, he... tolerates it. That's a better word. He tolerates them now.

And one night, Stede comes up to Edward and says Opertion Miob is nearing success. He's so excited that he says the acronym like a word, rather than spelling it out and he doesn't even notice. They decide it's best for Edward to go and seduce Izzy back to the cabin. From there, Stede will confess his willingness and they'll all fall into bed together and cuddle until the sunrises, the end :)

Except when Edward finds Izzy in the storeroom, he gets so riled up that he forgets all the fancy words he and Stede had scripted and just goes straight for the kill. He grabs Izzy and starts kissing him, holding onto him like he might die if he lets go and at first, Izzy is reciprocating.

At first.

But then Izzy shoves him off, wipes his mouth and tells Edward to go fuck himself for doing this to not only him but to Stede. You see, that time of Izzy 'tolerating' Stede's attention, he's grown a bit... fond of the man. He's starting to see why Edward was obsessed with the man, even if he refuses to admit it aloud. And while at literally any other fucking time before, this dalliance would have been welcomed with open arms, all Izzy can think about is how devastated Stede would be if he found out.

So he tells Edward off, cursing him out for betraying Stede's trust and trying to hurt one of the best men Izzy knows (and yes, Izzy says this out loud) and I'd he doesn't shape up and realize what a good man Stede is, he's going to lose him. So he's going to march back to the fucking Captains' quarters, tell Stede what's he's done, beg for forgiveness and promise to never do it again.

Edward is speechless and Izzy takes this as refusal. So you know what? Fuck it. Izzy may be Edward's right hand man but he's not a coward. He's going to Stede himself and he'll accept whatever punishment that Edward gives him for it but he is not going to let this stand. The only way relationships work is if all parties are truthful with each other.

So Izzy grabs Edward's arm and all-but drags him to the Captains' Quarters (surprisingly there is little resistance). And once he finds Stede, he immediately tells him what's just occured.

He's about to launch into a small tirade about trust and truthfulness when Stede brightens considerably, thinking that Edward's seduction has gone without a hitch. He stands up and walks over to Izzy, silencing him with a simple kiss.

Izzy's brain stops working.

Behind him, Edward is tearing up and trying to (unsuccessfully) hide it. He says 'Stede, babe, he says you're one of the best men he knows.'

And Stede rewards Izzy's compliment with another kiss. Edward huffs and says that Stede's hogging Izzy and grab him back for his own kiss. Stede scrunches up his face and says, oh well, I didn't get to kiss him for that long! No fair!

After a few rounds of this, when they finally let go of Izzy, he just looks between them before he says, "...okay." and lets them pull him towards the bed.

#ofmd #our flag means death #izzy hands #stede bonnet #edward teach #steddy hands #steddyhands #fic prompt #fic idea

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asmutwriter · 29 days

Text

You Saved Me (Part 13)

DESCRIPTION: (Season 11) whilst on a girls night out your friend manages to pick up an unexpected friend

WORD COUNT: 3215

From Beginning / Previous / Next / Master List

WARNINGS: swearing, drinking, talk of sex/sexual things, flirting, jealousy

DISCLAIMERS

- This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

- Not been proof read

“Someone has to do karaoke with me. It’s a matter of life or death” you friend Mel says. You had gone out for a night out with the girlies. Well more of a weekend out. You and four others for a girl’s holiday filled with alcohol. You, Mel, Justine, Izzy, and Tash.

“I don’t know. I think if any one of us is caught singing it’ll be the death of our eardrums” you respond to your friends comment. She pulls a face as the mocks you before smiling and grabbing your friend, Izzy’s, arm

"Help me” she mouths at you as she gets dragged onto the stage. You put your hand up to your ear. Then motioning at the place

“Sorry can’t hear you. Music’s to laud. Good luck” you smile at her. Tash smiles

“I’m going to go get us three some more drinks” she stands up. Smiling at you as Justine shakes her head

“No. No more. If I drink more within the next hour I think I may die” she shuts her eyes “I feel like my insides are retaliating” you laugh as Tash walks away. Justine rests her head on the table. You pat her back

“You’re not used to drinking are you?”

“No I’m not used to drinking the amount of alcohol you two have consumed” she brings her arms around and rests her head on them “how are you two not dead from alcoholism?”

“It’s one of the world’s mysteries” you smile as she grunts out a response. About 5 minutes pass. Tash walks back holding two pints

“Ok what did you do to her?” she motions at the drunk friend who still hasn’t lifted her head, even at the sound of someone else’s voice.

“I didn’t do anything. I can’t help it if she can’t handle her alcohol” she chuckles as she motions behind her

“I met someone at the bar. I said that he could come drink with us” she grins at you. The smile of ‘I want to get laid’. You nod as she places the drinks on the table. A guy comes over. Your eyes meeting his as she introduces you “Rose this is Dean. Dean, this is my friend Rose. The one passes out is Justine”. The Winchester brother smiles at you before he looks at the girl next to you

“Is she ok?”

“Yeah just very drunk” you look at her. Taking her wrist in your hand you feel for a pulse. “Yep just drunk. Not dead”

“Well that’s always a positive of the day” he sits down “glad to know you girls won’t kill me” Tash sits next to him, resting her arm on his shoulder as she picks up one of the pints

“I don’t know. It’s still early in the night” she wiggles her eyebrows at him as he laughs. You smile as you grab one of the pints

“I’ll leave you two alone”

“No stay” she places her hand on top of yours

“I’m ok. I don’t want to third wheel you guys”

“You aren’t being a third wheel” she says as her eyes meets yours. She then looks at Dean who has a soft look in his eyes as he faces you.

“Fine” the two friends who were up and singing come and sit down at the table you’re on

“Girls this is my new friend Dean” Tash says “Dean. These are my friends Mel and Izzy”

“It’s nice to meet you” Mel says shyly. Izzy smiles, taking his hand in hers

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Dean”

“We should play a game” Tash says “obviously one that involves drinking a lot of alcohol” causing the four of you who are conscious to laugh. “Truth or drink? But in the style of spin the bottle” she wiggles her eyebrows as they all nod. Izzy standing up as you get an empty bottle and place it on its side in the middle.

“I’ll go get us a few more drinks”

When it started off the questions were tame. “What’s your favourite colour?” and “how many pet cats do you have?” That’s when Tash decides to spice things up. It’s her turn to spin the bottle, it landing on Dean. She smiles at him as he turns his head to look at her

“If you had to sleep with any one of us, who would it be?” he chuckles, eyes scanning around the table

“Defiantly not the unconscious chick”

“Come on. Answer the question” she runs her tongue over her bottom lip as he smiles. Taking his cup he takes a swig. She rolls her eyes at him “you’re no fun”

“You made me decide between a bunch of pretty ladies. You expected me to choose?” she nods, her arm going round his neck more as he smiles at her. His arm going around her waist as he places his drink down. Taking the bottle and spinning it. It landing on Mel. He smiles at her “if we’re asking more spicy questions then... how old where you when you lost your v-card?”

“19″ he nods. She takes the bottle and spins it. It landing on you. You smile at her “when did you last have sex?”. You titl your head slightly. Taking a sip of your drink.

"It was either really good sex or really bad sex if thats your reaction". Taking the bottle and spinning it. The bottle lands on Dean as your friends make small comments about your boyfriend. He smiles as he looks at you. You think for a moment, gently running your tongue over your bottom lip as you contemplate a good question

“favourite sex position?”

“Probably cowgirl. But I like any so long as I can see her face” he smiles at you as you resist the urge to bite your bottom lip. Eyes darting to his upturned smile before he takes the bottle and spins it. It lands on Tash. You look at your now empty glass as he thinks

“I’m going to get a refill. Anyone else want one?” half of them nodding as you stand up. Taking a mental note that you need three beers for you, Tash and Dean. You head over to the bar. Getting out your purse you wait in the queue. A couple of minutes pass. Feeling a hand gently touch your lower back. You turn and see Dean next to you. He smiles at you

“Thought I’d give you a hand carrying the drinks back” you smile at him as you look back forward. Feeling his hand still placed on your lower back as he goes closer to you. “You’re friends are nice”

“Yeah. Tash seems to have taken quite an interest to you” A cocky grin appears on his face. You hit his shoulder slightly “keep it in your pants dude” he chuckles “the hotel we’re staying in isn’t to far from here if you want to take her back to it. Just let us know when you’re done” you smile as you talk to the bartender. Ordering some drinks.

The comfortable silence you could only share with Dean surrounding you both. The bartender resting the drinks onto the counter after hes made them. He takes two of the glasses and you take the other one. Moving away from the bar. Sipping the top of it as you follow him back through the crowd.

“What did we miss then girls?” he says, sitting down next to Tash again as he hands her one of the two glasses he’s holding

“Nothing much” she answers as she takes the cup from him, once again resting against him. Justine lifts her head up. Looking around as she stretches “Welcome back to the land of the living” she grunts out in response. Taking Tash’s beer from her hand and sipping it before handing it back to her.

“Jesus its cold in here” she wraps her arms around herself causing you to let out a small chuckle. Taking off your jacket and handing it to her “are you sure?”

“Yes. Can’t have you catching a chill because you didn’t think to bring a jumper. Plus I get too hot anyway. Especially when I’m drunk” you smile at her as she takes the jacket from you. Wrapping it around herself and placing her arms through it. You grab your drink again, sipping it before speaking.

“Come on. I want to play darts” They all shake their heads apart from Tash who also stands up

“I’ll play” Dean shrugs slightly

“Make that three then”

“You girls are wusses” you grab your drink as you go over to the dart board. Tash gently takes Deans arm in her hand

“Something you should know about Rose is that she is shit at darts. So if you want to bet something then you’ll likely get what you want” he chuckles slightly as he looks at you.

“What do you want to bet then?” you say in a slight mocking tone as he smirks, lips tilted up as he thinks through his choices.

“I'll be nice to you girls" He reaches into his pocket. Taking out his wallted and a £20 note. You smile. Going into your pocket and taking out the same amount of cash. As does Tash

“Bring it on pretty boy” she smiles at him.

The three of you play for ages. Tash beating you both. Taking your money. SHe was obviously very chilled about it. Placing it into her back pocket before dong a mini victory dance. Including her blowing the end of the dart, like blowing smoke from a gun. You laugb at her.

"Ok. Lets play again. £30 this time". SHe nods.

"Hell yeah. i can beat you all over again" you laugh. Looking at Dean as he nods.

"Im game. I'll go get us some more drinks though". He says. Walking off to the bar. Tash's phone beeps. SHe takes it out. Her smile turning to an annoyed frown.

"Fuck" she says. "Youve got to be fucking me".

"Everything ok?" you say. SHe nods. Rubbing her face with her hands as she continues to nod.

"Yeah. Just dandy. Just got a text". She holds her phone out towards you. You take it.

'Hey Tash. Really sorry but something has just come up. Are you able to come home tongiht?'

"SHit. Is that the babysitter?" she nods. Taking the phone from you again as she places it into her pocket.

"I have to go or else he'll be on his own"

"How will you get back? Youre well over the limit"

"I'll get a cab"

"Text me when you get home, ok?"

"Yes mum" she playfully says. "SHit what about Dean?"

"I'll explain. I'll tell him that it was something you couldnt avoid and I'll give him your number"

"Thank you. Best wing woman" she smiles. Hugging you close to her before she walks off. Dean coming back over. His eyes confused as he watches her leave.

"Was it something I said?". You shake your head. Taking the drink thats yours from him.

"Her babysitter just cancelled on her"

"That sucks". He takes a sip of his beer.

"Im still up for beating you in a round of darts though. For £30" you smile. Causing him to laugh.

"Oh youre on"

"You have been practivcing" he says as you score better then him.

"I had a good teacher. What can I say?" you go over to the board. Pulling out your darts. He chuckles as he aims. Managing to score highly, but not quite as high as you. You sile. Looking at him as you hold a hand out. "I believe you owe me 30 quid"

"Yeah I know" he says. Reaching into his pocket and taking out the money. Placing it into your hand.

"Pkeasure doing business with you". He chuckles. Looking at you as you place the darts down near the board. Shoving the money into your back pocket. Picking up your nearly finished beer and sipping it.

"You know... we could always blow this joint. My car is out the front. We could go to a motel or something". You look at him. A soft, apologcetic smile on your face as you speak.

"Im still with Mike"

"Oh" his cocky smile fading quicky at your words. You hlf smile.

"But I'll play a round of pool with you" he chuckles. Nodding slughtly as you both head over to the table. He sets it up. Eyes looking up at you before back down.

"WHat do you see in him then?"

"WHo? Mike?". He nods.

"Hes kind to me and the kids". You stay quiet. Taking the qhite ball and hitting it.

"Thats it?"

"What more do you want me to say? Hes kind, funny. What more do I need?"Watching as he ais the stick. Hitting the balls.

"Does he even know your real name?". You look at him. Shaking your head dslightly as he scoffs. Taking your turn as you feel his eyes on you. "You claim to like the man yet I still know you better then him". You shoot your ball. STanding up straight as you turn to face him

"Are you jealous of him?" He lets out a soft 'pfft'. "Oh my god you are. Youre jealous of him"

"I just think that a girl like you deserves so much better then some posh twat"

"You dont even know him Dean"

"I dont need to too know that hes a posh twat". You shake your head. Looking away as he takes his turn. He notices your defensive nature as he ends his go. Looking at you. Your eyes slightly hazed over from unseen tears. His jealous behavious leaving as he realises hes upset you. "Rose?". You face him. Annoyance in your face as you meet his green eyes. "I am happy for you. Truly. You deserve someone who will treat you right. ANd if you think hes the one... then I wish you both the best". You half smile.

"Thank you. You know, you desevre happines too". You say. Taking your shot. His eyes giving off an emotion you cant quite read.

"I dont have the right lifestyle for happiness like that".

"Thats a shame. Bcease I was going to give you Tash's number agyer this... But if you dont want it" you say. Your playful behavious coming back nto your tone as the mood suddenyl changes.

"No. I'll happily take her number from ypi. Lets just finish this game" you smile. Watching as he takes his next turn.

You watch. Both of you neck in neck. Having only the black ball left. He takes his aim. Hitting the ball. You clutch your pole. Watching as it goes into the hole. He fist bumps the air as you roll your eyes. And annoyed groan coming from your lips. "Good game" you say. Holding your hand out for him to shake. He smiles. Gripping it and shaking it.

"Pay back for the last time we played and you absoluetely pummeled me in this". You pick up the small chalk block. Using it on the end.

"Best out of three then?" you smile at him. Wiggling your eyebrows.

"What about your group of friends?". You move. Looking to see them all sat around a table. Arms lonked over each others shoulders as they sing whatever song is playing on the radio.

"I think we're good for another half an hour". He chuckles.

"Bring it on then" you smile. Setting up the table once again.

You hold onto your pool stick. Your friends had come over to watch the minn championship you were having. Cheering you on. That was until Dean started to absoluetly thrash you. You still had 5 balls on the table, whilst he was just trying to ping in the black ball. It was his turn. You held your breath as you watch. He leans accross the table. A cocky smirk on his face as he winks at you. Hitting the ball. Watching as it goes into the whole. He smiles. STanding up as he looks at you.

"You jammy fucker" you say. A slow clap as he coes over to you "Well done". He smiles.

"I think that calls for celebratory drinks, dont you?". You smile at him. Nodding. He looks at your group of friends. "Drinks on me in my cebrationary victory. WHo wants one?".

"We're going to call it a night" Mel says. Holding up Justine. "Im taking this one back to the hotel". SHe motions at the friend. He looks at Izzy.

"Im also going to call it a night. Rose, are you going to join us?"

"Im actually going to stay here for one more drink" you smile at your friends. They give you a soft and knowing look. Trusting you and your intentions.

"Text us if you need us to call a taxi"

"Thanks girls". You blow kisses at them as they leave. You and Dean left around the pool table.

"I'll go get you a celbratory drink" you say to him. SMiling as you head to the bar. Buying two more beers. ANd a whiskey each. Some vodka shots. Then another whiskey. You sit at a table. Laughing as he tells you a very unfunny joke. Your brain being to drunk to comprehend much logical thought.

Thats when you hear the bartender call out. Closing time. You look at the bar. "SHit, how long have we been in here?"

"Im guessing around 8 hours".

"Well fuck" you say. STretching as you stand up. "Im going to tkae that as my cue to leave. Go back to my girl friends". You fold your arms over yourself. "Shit..." you mutter. He stands near you.

"You ok?"

"Justine has my coat". He lets out a soft chuckle.

"I can give you a ride back to you hotel if youd like?"

"No. Im only just round the corner. The fresh air will do me good" you say. Feeling into your jean pockets and taking out your phone. Getting up a number. "I said I'd give you Tash's number" you say. Handing him your phone. He lets out a soft chuckle. Taking it from you asa he takes his mobile out. Typing in the digits and saving it to his phone.

"Its been good to see you Dean" you say. Placing a hand on his cheek as you kiss the other one. He looks at you. His eyes soft as they meet yours.

"Kat?"

"hmm?" you humm

"Im sorry. For everything. What I-". You shake your head.

"I forgive you. I will always figive you" you say. Going forward again as you hug him. He wraps his arms around you. Kissing the top of your head. "Im just glad that youre ok". You whisper. You stay like this for a few minutes befoe you pull away. Looking up at him. "I need to get back to my friends"

"Yeah. Sams probably waiting for me in the car so I should go and see him". You smile.

"Tell him I said hi. And dont forget to text Tash" he chuckles. Watching as you turn around. Heading out the back. Walking to your hotel. Quick paced as the cold morning air hits your skin.

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dessarious · 1 year

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Guilt and Consequences Pt21

Beginning Previous

"So how many times have you been thrown out of schools exactly?" Izzy seemed to be taking this whole thing fairly well, but Lila hesitated.

"Twenty-six." Sabine's eyes widened at the number, but Izzy laughed.

"We're definitely related." At Lila's confused look, Izzy kept going. "I've been thrown out of just about every boarding school in the US and five in Europe. Of course, mine were because of grades more than anything else."

"But you're smart."

"That really doesn't matter when you refuse to do anything but doodle on tests and homework. It was my form of willful disobedience for my grandparents pulling me out of the public school I was in. Not the brightest thing to do, but I was hurting and extremely pissed off about being pulled out of what was left of my life." She frowned at the ceiling. "If not for Aunt Penny, I probably would have done worse."

"Who?" Lila's question made Izzy's eyes light up.

"That's right, you only met her a couple of times when you were really little. She'll be so happy when she hears you're alive. She's Dad's sister. Well, adopted sister, but that's beside the point. I'll text her to see when she's going to be in Paris next."

"That wouldn't happen to be Penny Rolling, would it?" Lila almost choked at the question, but Sabine sounded amused.

"Yes actually, do you know her?" Lila heard laughter and turned to see Chloe and Marinette on the stairs.

"I guess you are actually connected to Jagged Stone, Rossi." Chloe's tone was dry. Lila groaned.

"Alya can't find out about this. It'll just make her more determined to believe I was telling the truth all along." Wait... Jagged and Penny both loved Mari. "She's going to hate me." Izzy just looked confused, but Sabine rolled her eyes.

"No, she won't. You're family, and it's not like you were purposely trying to cause harm."

"Jagged Stone loves Mari just as much as he does Ladybug. There's no way they're going to be okay with me."

"Wait, your daughter is the little designer Penny told me about?" Great, even Izzy knew about Mari's talent. She'd be lucky if Penny even acknowledged her, let alone wanted anything to do with her. Sabine nodded with a proud smile.

"They don't need to know what happened, and it was all a big misunderstanding anyway." Chloe scoffed at Mari's declaration, and Lila just wanted to bash her head into a wall. Mari was the only one who could possibly consider what happened a misunderstanding. Even Izzy was looking at the girl like she had a screw loose.

"I'll talk to Penny and explain things. It will be fine, I promise." Izzy's words should have been comforting, but Lila just felt sick. The fact that she had to be explained to a relation didn't say much for her. "Why don't we head out to get your stuff? We'll worry about the rest when it happens."

"I suppose." Izzy frowned at her and Lila had a feeling she knew that she'd be worrying about it, regardless. When she stood, she pulled Lila with her before turning to Sabine.

"We'll be back later, but I'll probably take Riley out for dinner after we're done, so it won't be quick." The woman just smiled at them.

"Of course. Have fun." The smile Izzy wore worried her. It was more manic than anything else.

——————————————————————

"You're not going to tell me what happened, are you?" Lila had come back into the lobby to find the staff cowering behind their desks while Izzy glared at them from near the doors. She'd rushed her out to the car before Lila could say anything.

"It's nothing you need to worry about." She got into the backseat as the driver held the door. She hadn't expected it, but it made sense that Izzy had a driver. Especially in a place she didn't know well. It still felt weird, especially with the man eyeing them like he expected an explosion. Whatever happened, it must have been loud enough for him to hear it. "You just need to worry about where you want to go to eat after we get you a camera and a new laptop just in case she can track that as well."

"I've been through everything on there and haven't found anything suspicious, but most of my stuff is backed up so it's not a big deal either way." She didn't mention that she hadn't stored anything she considered important on anything but flash drives and SD cards she could hide easily in years.

"I'll keep your old one with me just like your phone, so you'll be able to get whatever you need from it. I just don't want to risk her finding you."

"You really don't need to buy me a new one. I'm sure I can use Marinette's or go to a library if I have to for anything while you get things figured out." Izzy sighed.

"It's not about what you can work with. I want to get you whatever you need or want so that you don't have to go without anymore. Just let me try to assuage my guilt, please." The last part sounded almost desperate, so Lila dropped it. She wasn't certain how to feel about someone spending so much on her, but if it made Izzy feel better it seemed like it would be okay. "You're thinking too hard again. I can see it."

"Is there something wrong with me?" She winced as soon as the words came out. The question had been floating around in her head as long as she could remember, but she hadn't meant for it to come out.

"Why do you think something is wrong with you?" Izzy's tone was off.

"I... I don't understand things I should. Even when I was little, I acted differently from how everyone thought I should."

"Being different doesn't mean something's wrong with you. You see and relate to the world in a way most people don't." Lila could only frown at her. That certainly sounded like something was wrong. Izzy sighed. "Riley, everyone sees the world differently. I see it in terms of how much I can piss off my grandparents. Your friend Marinette sees it in terms of design. Mine is certainly less healthy, but that doesn't make either inherently wrong."

"How do I see it?" It was a stupid question. How was Izzy supposed to know that?

"Why and how." Izzy's words sounded like a statement, not a question, and that just confused Lila more. "You look at everything around you and ask why and how it works. You ask why things are the way they are. You ask how things can be different. It's against your nature to just accept things at face value. It's why it never even occurred to you that lying to those nitwits would backfire."

That was... an interesting theory. It seemed true to a point, but if she wasn't affected by something, or wasn't interested in it, she ignored it. If it became an issue, she'd research it. It was why she'd read so many books on psychology to try to understand the way her mother was with her. It hadn't helped at all, but she did try.

"Would it be easier if I just accepted things?" Izzy frowned at her.

"Easier for who? No, never mind. First, you would go insane if you didn't pick things apart. Second, giving other people the advantage like that is a terrible idea. If you don't look past the surface, it can be dangerous. Look at our father." Lila blinked in confusion at the tone.

"You blame him?"

"I don't want to influence your opinion of him, but all he had to do was look into her actions, or what she was doing with his money. He never did. Misplaced trust is the quickest way to get hurt. Look at Marinette." Lila tried to remember anything from the time before her father died, but there wasn't much.

"I don't remember him spending time with me. I do remember you arguing with him. He always said you were too cynical." Izzy winced.

"He was of the opinion that I didn't like your mother because I was jealous of the time he spent with her, and nothing I said would get him to think otherwise. I think he tried to not spend individual time with you because he thought it would make me angry. If I'd realized that at the time, I would have tried to do something about it."

She didn't know how to respond to that, but luckily they made it to the electronics store. Maybe she could come up with something if she had time to process. The store wasn't bad. She found a nice camera, and Izzy insisted on buying extra lenses for it too. Their computer selection wasn't great, but they had the components to upgrade or build yourself. Lila protested, but Izzy said buying everything she needed to build a desktop would let her get what she wanted (even though Izzy seemed set on getting the most recent and powerful components) and it would give her something to do while she had to hide at Mari's house. Besides, she shouldn't need a laptop until her mother was dealt with and they could get her a new one then. Lila didn't really think she needed two, let alone three, computers, but Izzy seemed so excited about it.

When they finally left, Izzy asked her if she'd figured out where she wanted to eat. Lila mentioned a cafe nearby she wanted to try, just to make sure they didn't end up in some high scale restaurant. She really didn't want to be stared at because they weren't wearing the right clothes, and she'd heard good things about the cafe.

"Lila!" How could her luck possibly be this bad? "Why haven't you been at school?" Seriously? She turned to look at Alya and Nino walking towards her. Alya's older sister was sitting at a table nearby. Fantastic.

"She's transferring to a different one." Alya glared at Izzy and Lila didn't even want to know what was going through her mind. Izzy, on the other hand, seemed to just dismiss the girl.

"Who are you?" The demanding tone just got an eye roll, and Lila could practically see the steam building in Alya's head. She really didn't want to deal with her being Akumatized again.

"Izzy's my sister. If you don't mind, we'd really like to eat in peace." She didn't know where the words came from, or the cold tone, for that matter. Izzy wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulders. Alya and Nino both just seemed stunned. She tried to walk away before Alya found her voice, but she didn't manage it.

"You don't need to transfer. Whatever Marinette threatened you with, we can help." Lila could only groan and bury her head in Izzy's side. It shouldn't be possible for someone to be this stubborn about something so stupid.

"Oh, you're that classmate." Alya bristled at Izzy's tone but didn't have time to respond. "Look, you really need to drop this. I don't hold out any hope you'll listen to reason, but if you don't stop this nonsense, I'll be sure to get restraining orders for both my sister and Marinette. They don't need all this stress."

"I'm trying to help her." Alya's indignant tone caused Izzy to pinch the bridge of her nose.

"No, you're not. You're trying to prove to yourself that you were right to believe Riley, and that your opinion of Marinette is justified."

"Who's Riley?" Yeah, this was just going to make things more complicated.

"I am. My mother changed my name a long time ago, but I prefer Izzy use the name I was born with." They didn't seem to know what to do with that.

"Why would she change your name?" Nino at least just sounded confused. Lila wished she had an answer for him, but she didn't actually have a clue what her mother's reasoning was.

"It doesn't matter. And it's really not the point." Even Lila could hear how drained she sounded. "I made a huge mistake lying to you all and assuming you'd call me on it, and I own that. But you need to stop blaming Marinette, of all people, for my bad behavior and your ignorance." She only just noticed that Alya's sister had walked over, and she seemed extremely confused.

"What happened with Mari? You never said anything."

"She's been bullying Lila ever since she transferred."

"Marinette? Tiny ball of sunshine that wouldn't stand up for herself over anything, but always helped and stood up for her friends? That Marinette?" Oh thank god, someone else could see the insanity. Alya blinked at her for a moment, as if trying to get her brain to reset.

"She's jealous because Adrien likes Lila more than her." That just got another frown, and Lila fought not to gag at the thought.

"That doesn't sound like her. Didn't she help the model when he wanted to date someone?" That definitely sounded like Mari, but Lila hadn't heard about it. Must have been before she came or while she was out of school.

"That's not the same." She actually stomped her foot when she said it. Rather than responding to her, her sister turned to Lila.

"Was Marinette bullying you?"

"No. I lied, and she called me on it. That was it." Well, that was all Mari did, at least. Alya looked like she was going to argue, but her sister shot her a look and her mouth clamped shut.

"Why don't you two go back and sit down?" Alya pouted, but she and Nino did go back to the table. "I'm Nora." She held out a hand and Lila just blinked at it. Izzy shook it instead.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Izzy, and this is my sister Riley, er, Lila. Have you decided what you want other people to call you by chance?" Lila just shrugged. Nora just seemed to roll with it.

"Did I hear something about restraining orders?" Lila cringed, but Izzy just sighed.

"Look, I know that Riley isn't innocent in all this, but your sister is blatantly refusing to believe she was wrong about her. She's already attacked Marinette once with some of their other classmates and I'm not about to risk it again. That girl has dealt with enough because of this nonsense."

"They did what!?" More than a few patrons side eyed them at Nora shout. "Do you have proof of that?"

"There's a video if you'd like to see it, but as I said, right now, everyone just wants to be done with this. Marinette doesn't want to get anyone in trouble, but neither her mother nor I are going to let this continue. If you can just get your sister to calm down and back off, it would solve a lot of problems. Marinette and Lila are both transferring to a different school and that should be the end of this."

"Mari's transferring over this?" Nora ran a hand down her face. "Alya doesn't do calm, but I'll talk to her and our parents. My mom's been trying to get her to agree to therapy for all the hero chasing she does, but I'll back her up this time. If what you're saying is true, she needs it more than I thought. I would like to see that video though, no offense." Izzy just pulled out her phone. When she'd asked for the video while they were talking earlier, Lila hadn't thought much of it. She certainly hadn't expected to need it so soon.

"Of course." She handed the phone to Nora and Lila just waited. She seemed far too calm, but she developed a twitch in her right cheek as she watched. When she handed the phone back, her expression was blank.

"Thank you. You can tell Madam Cheng that Alya won't be bothering her daughter again."

"I'm sorry." It took her a second for Lila to realize the words came from her. She'd been thinking them since this conversation started, but she hadn't meant to say them. Nora cocked her head in confusion. "None of this would have happened if not for me."

"Alya is old enough to make her own decisions. Regardless of what you told her, her actions were her own and completely unacceptable. Her being so suggestible is another thing we're going to have to address. Thank you for bringing this to our attention." She sounded grim, and Izzy frowned at her.

"You don't seem surprised."

"Tempers run in our family. It's why we've all been Akumatized except mom. My outlet is sports, and we thought Alya's was her blog and running after the heroes. I'm not surprised that this happened, but I can believe she'd do that to Mari, especially after everything she’s done for her."

"Maybe being Akumatized has something to do with." Yet another thought that she didn't expect to come out of her mouth. Nora frowned at her. "It's just that everyone in the class has been Akumatized, except Marinette and Adrien, and they're the only two that know I was lying. Well, Adrien knew because Ladybug called me out in front of him, so maybe not. But maybe being taken over like that leaves people vulnerable to suggestion. It would explain why he tends to go after the same people so much if he basically leaves a door open." Now they were both frowning at her. Nora ended up letting out a bark of laughter.

"Thanks for that thought, kid. Because I didn't have enough to be worried about." Lila opened her mouth to apologize, but Nora put a hand on her shoulder. "It's fine. You might even be right, so that's one more reason to get Alya, and all of us honestly, into therapy. I'll let you get on with your meal." She watched as Nora grabbed Alya and practically dragged her outside, Nino jogging behind to keep up. She looked back at Izzy to find her still frowning at her.

"Is that what you really think is happening?"

"It makes sense logically, but given we're dealing with magic, I don't know. It may just be that he has a limited range or something else entirely as well. I don't have enough information to be certain." Izzy was still frowning at her, but eventually shook her head as if trying to get rid of a thought.

"We'll talk more about this later, but we do need to eat." Lila wasn't certain what else there was to talk about, but she just nodded. "Please tell you you've gotten over your 'I only eat green food' phase."

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Tag List

@readeracctagmepls @aestheticnpoetic @akana-sama @schrodingers25 @runestarchild @paradoxal-occurance @heaven428 @animegirlweeb @deepestobservationwombat @iggy-of-fans @yin-390 @thehufflepuffranger-blog @trippingovermyfeet @misslenamooney @ladybug-182 @zalladane @pale-lady-dreamer @smolplantmum @peachedpocky @bezzy-d @naoryllis @sassakitty @18-fandoms-unite-08 @toodaloo-kangaroo @nobigdealcy

#lila rossi #lila redemption #original character #sabine cheng #alya cesaire #alya salt #nora cesaire #nino lahiffe #miraculous ladybug

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llewnanith · 2 years

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im so sorry this isnt a theory its barely even an au its just something i use to torture myself with izzy hands thoughts so take this evil little concept

Stede Bonnet, like most people, assumes the ring was from a lover. a lover lost, maybe, and that's why Izzy wore the ring on his cravat instead of on his hand. then, he wonders if the ring came from Ed. some sort of promise of serving his captain forever.

when he asks Ed, Ed is almost incredulous. assures Stede that no, it isn't Ed's ring. there isn't a matelotage, or any sort of union. he doesn't know where the fuck the ring comes from, only that the handful of times he's tried to needle and ask Izzy what the deal was, Izzy got even more snappy. then, Izzy would get withdrawn, quiet, cold. so Ed stopped asking after the years, prompts Stede not to, less he get run through again. Ed's only partially joking.

Stede, naturally, asks anyways. Izzy, naturally, bites his head off for it. then he becomes withdrawn, quiet, and cold. it's startling, the way he suddenly lets the crew get away with things he'd normally throw a fit over. it lasts for a few days, and then things slowly repair themselves. Izzy won't look at Stede for a month, but more or less that's that.

then, the weather gets shifts. the seasons change. the year goes on. and Izzy gets all withdrawn again, with no prompting. Stede asks Ed about it. Ed says that he always does this around this time of year. it's fine, he works himself out of it. if you ask about it, it will only make it worse.

Stede, naturally, asks about it. in his defense, he's still not entirely sure how it happened. all he knows is that Izzy hadn't been seen all day, which was concerning Ed, and so of course Stede had to fix it. he doesn't like Izzy, far from it, but if he was scheming with the british again, Stede was going to catch him and deal with him. hopefully. but when he goes to Izzy's room, he isn't there. he isn't in the rec room, or the crow's nest, or any of his other favorite places to be (don't ask him why he knows all of Izzy's favorite places, the man cycles the same 5 spots on the ship to sulk, alright? that's all)

it's only out of sheer desperation does he start checking the secret passages, and it's only out of sheer luck he finds the man. he's almost drunk himself to death, the bastard. the ring sits in Izzy's palm like he doesn't know what to do with it. Stede isn't the most experienced man on the seas, but he knows grief when he sees it, and he's seeing it.

so, gently, he compliments the ring. and Izzy, not so gently, tells him to fuck off. but he doesn't run him through when Stede sits by him, yet. and Stede doesn't rush it, he lets the silence settle over them, lets the two of them snipe and crack and melt down in this quiet moment. eventually, he asks if the ring is from Izzy's lover. and he says yes, but it isn't for him. he describes a woman, but there's something missing from his words. it's the same way Stede would talk about Mary. strikingly platonic, and Izzy dances around the word wife, eventually settling on 'friend', which even still is a shock.

Stede tells Izzy that he is sorry for his loss, and Izzy does the most wondrous thing: he fuckin laughs. and he calls Stede an idiot, and tells Stede that her death anniversary was months ago. and so, naturally, Stede is confused out of his mind.

and Izzy tells him a story of a damp, small town in England. a town where work was hard, and you died before you lived. and Izzy tells a story of knowing he didn't look at the girls the same ways the boys in the workplace did, and yet the prettiest girl still sought him out because he was short and pretty, and she knew he didn't look at her. and then, Izzy tells a story about a death in birth, and a daughter, and a ring meant for her when she's older. Stede, fleetingly, wants to run away from Izzy. out of this secret passage and away from this truth that he of all people should not be hearing. but Izzy tells him the story of his daughter. it almost sounds like a fairytale, the way Izzy frames it. a story about a man and his daughter making it out of a terrible town, sailing the sea together, being a family of pirates. it is exactly what Stede had dreamed of, exactly what he wanted, and exactly what Izzy had wanted.

it doesn't have a happy ending. it twists when Izzy, bartering for a boat with a merchant to get them out of there, takes his eyes off of his daughter for too long at the docks. and she didn't know any better. and Izzy should have been watching her, he told her not to wander too far, but he should have been watching her. and he just turned his back for a minute, two, ten, more until he turned around and couldn't see her anymore. he tried to go after her, but the people at the docks were too kind to let him dive into the water again after they fished him out the first two times. Izzy hates them, still. that's why he stole a small boat, only big enough for one person (because that's all it needed to be), in the middle of the night and set out. he didn't have any food, or any water, and he didn't care. hornigold found him, then, half-dead and alone. and at age 18 Izzy became a pirate. for a while, people assumed he was mute, because when he makes it out of the infirmary he doesn't say a word. the man that approaches him and introduces himself as Edward Teach (born on a beach), it's the first name Izzy says other than the one that still rings in his head, throat still aching from where he screamed as he dove into that water as if the tide would take him too.

Stede doesn't know what happens at the end of Izzy's story. he just doesn't let anyone ask Izzy about the ring, and he scolds Lucius for pushing about it, and he tries not to think about his own children. he thinks about Blackbeard, and he thinks about ghosts, and he thinks about how if you look out at the water for too long and too closely you might see a reflection, distorted enough to look like two.

#izzy hands #ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd izzy #stede bonnet #ask to tag #sorry this was so long i didnt mean for it to be #im just. well i have the izzy plague #something something stede willing giving up his family and children and izzy not having a choice in losing them #also izzy 100% thinks of himself as the killer of his daughter like straight up. 'i killed her it was me'

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queenmeredith13-blog · 2 years

Text

Stede had been thinking a lot about it lately, about how maybe he wasn’t treating everyone in the same way on this ship. Especially giving too much attention to Ed, which he didn’t mind doing and enjoyed their times together. Then again it was a ship, their ship, all of them played a part in where they were now and being a co-captain that he was, Stede decided to change what he was doing. He planned to give everyone more attention, maybe compliments about how much of a great work they were doing for the ship. It didn’t sound difficult, maybe except one person could make it harder for him.

Izzy. Izzy who looked a bit- oh, more than a bit grumpy and distant. Stede had a feeling that Izzy was acting like this for a reason, and he wanted to learn why and get closer with him like everyone else. Stede didn’t want to comment on someone who he didn’t entirely know but he couldn’t help agreeing with Izzy on most of the things. Maybe Iz’s words were painful for people to hear but they were still the truth. There could be something down there in Izzy, or maybe not even that deep down, and Stede wanted to explore that side of him so he wanted to talk to Ed about it, which sounded a little grumpy at first, just like everyone else but asking for the second time was enough already.

‘‘Yeah- actually a nice idea. Do you have an idea to where to start from though, mate?’‘ Ed blinked as he looked at Stede, didn’t sound too bad to get closer with Iz again. ‘‘We can- we can- oh shit- actually, it’s Izzy’s birthday today. Why don’t we start from there?’‘

‘‘It’s Izzy’s birthday? Why didn’t you tell me before, Ed? But that’s okay- go find everyone and tell them to prepare, whatever they can find. We should make this a really nice surprise party. Make sure that Lucius keeps Iz busy, too.’‘ Stede said, he spent no time walking over to the kitchen and talk to Roach about how he should cook all the best food he had, especially an orange flavoured cake since he didn’t know what else to make it from and if they had any other ingredients that could fit. Ed was trying to convince everyone to hold anything they could find, some lamp and plant and flowers, whatever that could look pretty since they didn’t have the greatest decoration items after all, preparing the deck and putting a big table there for all the food and the cake.

Stede was also glad to see everyone was holding something in their hands, even if it was a simple orange or apple or a... was that a bootlace in Ed’s hands? Still was something and looked nice, he kept his own gift in his pocket and grabbed Ed by the arm to drag him to Iz’s door, knocking on the door, letting Ed do the talk.

Ed nodded, clearing his throat. ‘’Izzy! Mate, hurry up. There’s something on this ship that looks extremely dangerous. I myself am terrified and we need you out here, mate.’’ Ed went back up with Stede, now only waiting for Iz to come up with bootlaces in his hand, wondering if Stede prepared any gifts.

#izzyeffinhands #izzy x blackbeard #izzy x ed #yes this is me starting

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izzy-b-hands · 1 year

Text

Stress Reliever

A shout out to @rhysdarbytits for the cjizzy posting that got the idea of them absolutely stuck in my head (no complaints there, it's just funny to me that I went from Fuck Calico Jack 😡 to Fuck...Fuck Calico Jack 👀 in the space of like. God maybe twoish months??)

FTM Trans Izzy because I can lol.

Some allusion to past/ongoing ed/jack, potential for blackhands in this as well

This is purely NSFW; just cockwarming and fucking and emotions

---

"You don't gotta do anything," Jack sighs. "Just sit there and...fuck."

He doesn't intend to clench that tightly around Jack, but he's only following instructions. Jack wants him to sit and warm his cock and do nothing else?

Consider it done, considering he's been losing his mind keeping track of and doing anything and everything else asked of him this week. He hadn't planned to hook up again with Jack at all, but then there he was as they trudged off the ship with Izzy wanting nothing more than permission to relax and...

Jack's cock pulses inside him.

That's also a strong motivator to hook up again with Jack.

"I can literally feel how stressed you are like this," Jack says. "That's just fucked up, Iz. You should not be able to measure stress via cunt."

He snorts and laughs into Jack's shoulder, hissing when Jack's fingers dig into his hips.

"I'm serious!" Jack continues, his hands directing the gentle motion of Izzy's hips. "I know how Ed gets. I love him. Love his dick-"

"Please don't," Izzy mutters.

"Look, I told him if he paid more attention he'd see how you feel for him! I told him just to fuckin' ask you about it too," Jack says with a shiver. "If he had, he could have been in on this too."

Izzy tries to grind more, out of spite. If Jack is truthful about Ed, and he has no reason not to be, then Ed has some inkling that Izzy likes him, wants more with him. But he's never once addressed it.

"I mentioned you might initiate that conversation too," Jack grips at Izzy's hips hard enough to sting. "You haven't done that, clearly."

"Jack," Izzy's head hasn't moved from Jack's shoulder. "Please."

"Fine, I'll let it be," Jack says. "But you know I'm right."

Izzy moans into Jack's neck in between hastily pressed kisses, fighting to move his hips more. They're evenly matched most ways, but he melts when Jack has him like this, and that means it's a useless fight.

"Not yet," Jack hisses. "The idea was you relax, come for me, and cuddle. Not that you fuck your way out of having to hear the truth."

"I know you're right," Izzy says against his skin. "But I can't seem to say the right things to make him listen. Not yet, at least. It's not for lack of trying-"

"Hey," Jack's hand runs soothingly down his back. "I didn't know that; I'm sorry."

"Please," it's easier to beg to be allowed to move, or for Jack to fuck him, than it is to beg for what he wants just as much:

For Jack to somehow know what Ed needs to hear so he'll listen to Izzy. Even if any passing interest he had is gone, at least the air would be clear.

"Shh," Jack murmurs and reaches between them to tease Izzy's cock. "Arms around my neck, there. Knees okay? We can move if you need to."

He can't manage words anymore. The best he can do is a needy whine while Jack thrusts up into him.

Ed is probably wondering where they are. He knows that Izzy and Jack have hooked up before, just like Izzy knows Jack and Ed have done the same.

He did see them walk away together, but Izzy didn't say why he was stepping aside with Jack. By now, he's probably got a good idea.

Izzy knows he shouldn't like the idea that that might make Ed jealous. But he does.

"You're still overthinking," Jack says softly. "Come on, Iz. Fang said you guys were leaving before morning-"

"If it takes me that long to relax enough to come, then they can fucking wait for me and like it," Izzy interrupts.

Jack slaps his ass. Not something he likes with anyone else, but somehow Jack makes it hot.

"That's better! Now bring that attitude to talking with Ed, and-"

Izzy kisses Jack hard to shut him up. It's not meant to be insulting advice he's sure, but he can't handle hearing it right now.

"Like that," Jack smiles. "Good boy."

He lets Jack direct his hips with gentle touches after that, head resting on his shoulder again.

Jack doesn't in any way look like the sort of man most would expect to fuck this sweetly. It somehow still takes Izzy by surprise to feel Jack panting into his neck, hands moving often as if he couldn't bear not being able to touch all of Izzy at once.

"Look at me," Jack murmurs when they're both shaking, right on the edge. "I want you happier the next time I see you, okay?"

Izzy nods. If he talks, he might cry.

"That's probably gonna mean trying to have that conversation with Ed again," Jack continues. "It would help you both, no matter how it ends after."

He moans and whimpers into Jack's mouth through their next kiss. It almost aches, being this close. And Jack will fuck him through it to another for both of them, if Izzy wants it. He always offers, even when he's sensitive enough that his thighs shake with each thrust.

"I'm here for you," Jack sighs. "And Ed. And whatever comes after."

He knows he's leaving marks from digging his nails into Jack's shoulders. It's not just the impending orgasm, it's how fragile he feels. If he doesn't have Jack's lap to sit on and Jack's arms around him, he'll shatter.

"Come for me," Jack's voice is even, but his hips shudder out of rhythm. "Let me see you happy before you leave."

He forces down the louder cries and moans that would absolutely have Jack's neighbours in the inn banging on the wall, and bites gently into Jack's shoulder to muffle the rest while he comes.

"Don't stop moving," Jack begs. "I know it probably feels like too much, but I'm-"

Izzy grinds down and fucks Jack as fast as he can. He lets his eyes roll back in his head and focuses on nothing else but what he can feel: that he's nearly there again already, how hard Jack is inside him and how his cum is dripping down onto Jack's balls-

Jack interrupts his train of thought with a soft needy groan, and the sensation of his cock pulsing inside.

"Don't have to move yet if you don't want to," Jack says a moment later when Izzy moves to climb off of him. "Not that we have to go for round two-"

Izzy sinks back down carefully onto Jack's softening cock. "I'd like that. Actually... I think maybe you need me here for the weekend."

Jack's eyes light up. "I think I do. Now, it's not gonna be an easy time."

"No?"

"No," Jack smiles and runs a hand through Izzy's hair. "You'll be expected to sit and hang out with me. Fuck until we both need a break."

Izzy grins and melts into the hug Jack offers. "Sounds like work."

"Yeah, but you're good at work, at being on top of things. That's why Ed made you his first mate, why people still sail with you even when you're a miserable bastard."

"That's painfully romantic," Izzy chuckles.

"Well, you'll also need to go out with me, have dinner. Maybe camp out on the beach one night. Lots of boring, relaxing work. I think you can handle it for a weekend."

Izzy sighs. "I don't know if Ed will spare me for the weekend."

"You sail well alone whenever he wants to be here with me," Jack says. "Ed will be fine doing the same, and he knows it."

"You're right," Izzy snuggles into his neck. "Someone should go tell Ed."

Jack leans them back into the pillows. "I'll go in another minute or two."

"And what if I have you hard again by then?" Izzy teases. Jack's not far off from it even now, for that matter. Another minute would almost be too much time.

"Then Ed will have to be patient and wait," Jack chuckles. "Or he could watch, if he wants."

The shuddering mini orgasm and groan are involuntary, but Izzy still blushes after them while Jack laughs.

#text post #ofmd fic #cjizzy

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cityandking · 8 months

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3, 7, 12, 19, 27 for the first two ships that come to mind!

thanks tabby! I'll do the girls and dairef // development questions for couples

3. By contrast, what was the moment that first made their ~heart~ Soft for the other person? Not necessarily a conscious realization of “I love this person,” but a moment that had them like “Oh...I adore them...”

BRAN/SABINE — it was absolutely sabine getting into a fight. doesn't matter which au; bran saw sabine get into it with a guy at least half a foot taller than her and was like. oh. I want her to come home with me. huh. (I have no idea what swayed sabine but I'd imagine it involved bran being at least a little bit of a cocky sonuvabitch) DAI/ZAREF — some moment of watching zaref with izzy and seeing him like, 80% more chill than normal. the trust was there already, and the admiration, but there was that small and strange period of time in selto where everything was quiet and they could all settle in and daichi saw him without all his armor (metaphorically and also literally) and was like. oh. oh. (word of DM says for zaref it was shortly after they arrived in wiztopia, after they had their talk about zaref hiding the truth of the void from them but daichi being willing to trust him and trust that they'd have each other's backs)

7. Do they (or would they) pursue the other character’s affection, and if so, how? Do they tell the other character how they feel? Try to earn their admiration? Woo them with romantic gestures? Flirt with them, skillfully or otherwise?

BRAN/SABINE — yeah, absolutely. bran loves flirting and putting on a show and grand gestures, and she also likes being liked, which means a lot of wooing. it starts out kind of teasing and fun—bran likes sabine's exasperation and likes it even more when she's honestly surprised or pleased about something—but the longer it goes on, the more it's clear that this isn't just a temporary thing, the more heartfelt and intimate it becomes (I don't think there's actually much feelings talk, but actions speak louder and all that) DAI/ZAREF — there's pretty much no pursuing going on there, tbh. daichi really doesn't flirt, isn't one for grand gestures, and doesn't feel the need to earn anyone's admiration. he's a pretty straightforward person and not interested in chasing after people or imposing himself on anyone (unless he's having a gods talk with ozy I guess), so he was truly willing to let things lie. even their first kiss wasn't really a planned thing, it was just. sometimes you give a boy back months of memories and they're all colored by your admiration and affection and trust in him and then you kiss about it a little, maybe. (they did have a proper talk about it, though. dai is big on talking things out; he needs to know how things lie.) (if there's any kind of pursuing happening, it's dai trying to get zaref to talk to him about his past. which has gone sooooo well so far (jk))

12. How much independence do they prefer in a relationship—do they want to share their lives as much as possible with their partner, or do they prefer to mostly do their own thing and let their partner do their own thing?

BRAN/SABINE — I think they're both good at doing their own thing and coming back together after. bran definitely travels a lot, whether or not sabine comes with. not that either of them would mind sharing things, they're just both pretty independent as people, and I think sometimes they need their space. DAI/ZAREF — dai actively enjoys sharing stuff with zaref and is kind of constantly interested in making space for him. that said, I think they're both pretty content to go off and do their own things, then come back together later—they're both pretty private.

19. Are they okay with public displays of affection? Do they like them?

BRAN/SABINE — bran is pro PDA. that's her wife! everyone should know it! check out her favorite person who she loves!! (I think she probably tones it down a little, especially if sabine isn't into it, but generally speaking yeah, bran will be affectionate anywhere.) DAI/ZAREF — daichi doesn't particularly enjoy public displays of affection. the affection is fine, he just doesn't like the attention. plus the first time he and zaref kissed in public it started a domino effect that led to a horrible blowup fight with his best friend, which was never resolved, so. he's a little PDA shy. (I have no idea what zaref's feelings on PDA are but I'd imagine he's a little less picky about it than daichi, given their past discussions.)

27. They have to apologize to their partner. Is this difficult for them? How do they approach it?

BRAN/SABINE — bran's really good at apologizing, actually. part of her life experience has been fostering good communication skills (can't be captain if you don't know how to work with people!) so she's quite adept at talking about stuff after a fight or misstep. she might need some time to process first, but she'll make sure a conversation happens. DAI/ZAREF — haha wow. this is so relevant. yeah. great. I mean on the one hand, he's good at it; daichi has an enormous responsibility complex and is very good at owning up to things he's done and apologizing for them. he doesn't like to let stuff linger. on the other hand, sometimes you explode yourself right in front of your boyfriend, try to sway him to join your demon army by telling him he'd do well as a soulless soldier of the abyss, and then try to kill him when he turns down your offer, so. maybe sorry doesn't exactly cover that? and you aren't sure how you're going to fix that or make up for any of it? because he's really mad at you (and rightfully so in your opinion)? but you still have to try? (he's gonna go with the straightforward and honest approach and then, uh. see how that goes.)

#wow get a load of all these good kids #memery #r: sea and salt #r: light through stained glass #ty!!

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