#everyday heroes

[chronicallycouchbound]

What’s So Wrong With Having Heroes?

When I was a little kid, I wanted to be a doctor or a veterinarian. I wanted to help heal. And even as a small child, it felt like my calling.

Most kids dream of becoming a hero. The firefighters, the builders, the astronauts. The one’s who get medals and standing ovations. There’s many very monetarily successful movies and comics about all the superheroes we dream of. The people we want to save us. At one point, I thought I could be a hero. I wanted to be.

Being a hero wasn’t an issue for me though. People started to notice acts of kindness in me, and when they held that in high regard, I did too. I did everything I could to help others. It came naturally.

I bandaged my siblings and pets and strangers up. I gave advice like a wise old man, my aunt thanked me for helping her to leave her abusive husband when I was 8. I saved two people from drowning when I was 10. I talked friends out of suicide a dozen times. I became a street medic. I have saved dozens of lives, often under extraordinary circumstances. By definition, I fit the one for ‘hero’.

And I have so many issues with it. This isn’t a humble brag.

I genuinely think that we, as a society, put certain people on pedestals that shouldn’t be. I don’t think anyone should be. The hierarchy of heroes is inequitable and unrealistic. I think we should do the right thing because it’s the right thing, not to win an award or a badge of honor.

I see headlines all the time that are just ‘hero firefighter does their job!’. They’re paid to do this, of course they’re going to do it. As an abolitionist, I see cops hailed as heroes, usually for doing the objectively right thing, and it seems to magically erase the realities of what they do, the systemic harm they perpetuate. It’s the entirety of the ‘there’s some good cops’ narrative. And it causes great detriment to our communities because it makes it seem like the police do more good than bad.

Society particularly loves to paint white, cishet, abled, rich, educated, affluent men as heroes. The ones who can save us. Our hero.

And yet we ignore the people who are saving lives left and right, like people who use drugs who Narcan their friends. Or trans youth who stay up all night with their suicidal friends. Or the street medics who set up civilian ambulances for their under-served and neglected communities.

No one’s giving them medals.

Beyond that, people aren’t checking in on heroes. I’ve heard “you’re incredible!” and “thank you” a million times, but rarely do people genuinely check in on me after I’ve rescued someone.

And I usually need it. I’m at my worst mentally and usually physically after a rescue. It often takes months or years to process those events— they are traumatic for the rescuer too. Especially those of us without formal training or those of us who have attempted to rescue someone and lost them. We’re left to drift among all of these confusing and conflicting emotions, sometimes never understanding why.

The worst thing I hear: “I could NEVER do what you did”. It breaks me apart every time.

I don’t want to be doing this alone. I don’t want to have to save people over and over. I can’t save everyone.

I have to repeat that last one like a mantra sometimes.

I can’t save everyone. And so often, I still try to. I jump in without thinking. I throw myself into danger and worry about myself last, or, never. And it usually ends with me being seriously injured.

When I’d bandage up my siblings and pets it was after our parents hit us. I stepped in front of them as often as I could. I swallowed so much water while trying to save someone from drowning because they kept pulling me under that I puked. My 20-something-year-old boyfriend I dated when I was 16 stabbed me with the knife I had just talked him out of cutting himself with. He went on to keep caving my face in and choking me until I was blue. And of course, I’ve been seriously injured dozens of times during rescues. My body physically hurts so much afterwards, let alone the emotional toll.

I have to wonder: What would happen if I didn’t step in? Would it be so bad?

But of course, my brain always answers with a thousand of the worst case scenarios— or, just with what happened anyways. Sometimes people die no matter how much you try to fight to save them. And that has to just be what it is.

I think sometimes people live, and that just has to be what it is too.

But when we ascribe people as heroes, the message we send is that some people are heroes, some people aren’t. And I feel so strongly that this isn’t true. I believe that everyone has the capacity to help others, and so often, they do so in seemingly insignificant ways, and their deeds are not recognized.

Small acts of kindness are never small.

Life saving happens in everyday, ordinary ways. Sometimes what has saved my life has been something the other person will never remember or know. The Christmas cards from the elementary schoolers sent to the homeless shelter I lived at. The partners and friends who sat with me until I was safe on my own. My friends who held my hand as my heart beat dangerously fast, their presence being all I could feel, replacing the tightness in my chest. My cat cuddling me, purring until she snores. Strangers holding doors, strangers carrying my groceries, strangers checking on me. The dozens of items from my Amazon wishlists that have kept me alive.

I wish I could say how thankful I am to the community that’s kept me alive. How every time they’ve called me a hero, it’s because they made me possible. That they’re a hero just as much as I am.

I read ‘Mutual Aid: Building Solidarity During This Crisis (And The Next)’ by Dean Spade recently. In it, Dean describes “leader-less and leader-full” movements. It’s exactly what we need in the world. Hero-less and hero-full communities. We don’t need a select few— we need communities and societies structured around giving care. We need it to be standard, not extraordinary.

Personal responsibility can lead to community responsibility. We could have thriving, beautiful communities where we all care for each other so fully that no one single person is a savior, because we are all uplifted equitably.

I urge everyone I know to be more like the heroes they uplift. To think about what values they hold in high regard in others and to apply them to their own actions. To be what they already are, and acknowledge it.

You’re included.

#heroes #chronically couchbound #tw #hero #abolitionist #savior complex #white savior #white saviour complex #personal essay #leftist #anarchist theory #leftist theory #mutual aid #mutual aid networks #community care #feminist theory #inspiration #inspirational #inspiring heroes #everyday heroes #liberationist #equity

[oldbutnotyetwise]

Everyday Heroes

       

     So I’ve been thinking of Everyday Heroes a bit lately.  Not the heroes who are awarded medals, or get public recognition for whatever they did, or my least favourite of all, the Social Media Hero more interested in posting their good deeds to satisfy their own demented need for attention.  I’m talking about the heroes among us, the everyday people that we might not give a second glance to in passing.  People we might see everyday but have no idea about their lives as unrecognized heroes.  Think about that for a moment, can you think of anyone who might be like that in your life?  While you are pondering that, let me tell you that I have many heroes in my life, I would like to tell you about a few of them.  

     I have always been rather introverted, in fact I often refer to myself as an outgoing introvert, which I suppose sounds strange but in my case is accurate.  I had always wanted to work at my skills as a wordsmith, but on my own I was floundering.  One day I saw that the Powassan Library had a Writing Group and so I thought I would stretch my comfort zone and attend their next meeting.  Although I found it intimidating and stressful, I recognized that I needed this push to get me to write.  So every other Saturday at 10:00 I showed up, in time I got comfortable and tried my best to assemble my random thoughts into some kind of order that might be tolerable to read and just maybe give people a few things to ponder.  We are an eclectic group of people who support, encourage and help each other do something we all love.  Although we would all probably write without the group, for myself it is belonging to this group that pushes me to write, that helped me revive a blog that had long ago grown stagnant.  Even after I was forced to move away they still let me attend via Zoom.  This group was started by Faye, she is the glue that holds us together.  Now I know she would brush it off suggesting it’s no big deal, but it is a big deal to me.  If she had not started this group I would have missed out on an incredible gift, a gift that has given me purpose and so much joy as my world collapsed around me.  Faye is one of my Everyday Heroes.

     When Robin and I made our first visit to Sunnybrook Hospital in Toronto, it was a pretty overwhelming day.  First they did a bunch of tests to confirm the diagnosis before sending us to the far end of the hospital where the ALS Clinic is located.  We sat there in the hallway looking at the club I have just joined, the one no one wants to join.  Looking around at the others waiting, knowing this is a preview of what is ahead for us, these broken people and their exhausted caretakers, and my head was just spinning.  We eventually are placed in a room where a stream of doctors, specialists and research people come and go, the day was all such a blur.  On that first day, and every visit we made to Sunnybrook there was this one person who stood out, far above the rest.  Brianna couldn’t make me better, no one could, but Brianna could help make life more bearable, and she repeatedly did.  She is my Occupational Therapist.   She was the one who in the coming months would repeatedly help me get the equipment I needed to survive and adapt to the steady decline.  It’s not just that she is so incredible at what she does, or that she is so efficient at managing so many different things at the same time, it was her compassion and empathy.  Of all the people at that ALS Clinic, she was the one that calmed our frayed nerves, she was the one who we knew cared, was truly on our side, the one we could laugh and joke with despite the dire situation.  I haven’t seen her for months, and I won’t ever see her again, but I hope she knows that she made a difference, that she had an impact on my life, and that she is one of my everyday heroes.

     Robin and I were doing our best to navigate a complicated system involving our ALS Clinic, numerous different doctors and specialists, drug companies, Insurance companies, medical equipment supply companies, Community Care with all their services, ALS Society, and numerous other organizations.  It was hard to keep track and just generally overwhelming.  Then one day we met my Killer Blonde, she was one of the two Assessors I needed to be approved by for MAID (Medical Assistance In Dying). Although she certainly didn’t have to, she agreed to take me on as a patient in her Palliative Care Practice.  She is a kind gentle soul who immediately put us at ease, despite the nature of our first meeting.  She visits with us every two weeks for an hour, actually listens to our challenges and helps us to overcome whatever we are struggling with.  She doesn’t claim to know everything but if she doesn’t know, she does find out the answer and gets back to us.  She has laughed with us, and she has cried with us. We know without a doubt that she genuinely cares and you can’t imagine the amount of comfort that brings to us as we struggle through each day.  I’m not sure how she does the work she does, caring as much as she does while caring for the dying.  There are no happy outcomes in her work,  but she can help people to a kinder, gentler death, and that is a pretty noble profession.  Dr. Celine is one of my Everyday Heroes.

     When you are diagnosed with ALS you are given exclusive membership in this elite club, a club no one wants to join, but once in, you find yourself surrounded by others in similar circumstances who understand like others not afflicted with this disease can not.  You will see people who fight this disease by advocating for the rest of us, by fundraising millions of dollars hoping to find a cure, or maybe by just offering that helping hand to others.  Some of my ALS friends have helped, guided, supported, listened, inspired and just made this intolerable journey a little more tolerable.  My fellow ALS People, you are my Everyday Heroes, thank you for helping me make it through the dark days.

     Families that include someone with ALS, well… they know things other families don’t know.  Things they can only learn through walking through the hell that ALS brings when it moves in with you.  They watch as their PALS (Person with ALS) dies bit by bit.  They watch their dreams disappear, sometimes they watch their career suddenly end as they stay home to care for their loved one.  Their once carefree life full of possibilities is now just full of medical equipment, medication, expensive bills and lost hope.  It’s hard watching the person you love die.  The caretakers are so completely exhausted struggling to go on, longing for peace and rest but knowing that only comes after their loved one dies, and that’s a high price for peace and rest.  The family members who care for their loved ones, they are my Everyday Heroes.

     I would like you to think about what that would be like to have strangers in your home, helping you get dressed, bathed and toileted.  ALS, besides robbing you of a functioning body, also steals every shred of dignity you have.  We presently accept 3 hours a week of help from a PSW, that lets Robin get out and have lunch with a friend, or maybe grab some groceries.  We are entitled to ninety hours a month of care.  Due to the many little crises that now come up every day Robin can no longer leave me on my own for very long, too many things can go wrong.  The reason I mention this is because my sweet Robin continues to do everything, the work of so many.  I assure you she has never worked so hard in her life, and that is saying a lot considering she was once the mother of four children under six years old.  She does this because she loves me, she does this to spare me having all these indignities to me being done by strangers.  What does Love look like?  Love looks like my precious Robin.  She is my very favourite Everyday Hero.

#als #gratitude #love #everyday heroes

[mt-nynj-queer]

Christian Cooper

#Christian Cooper #everyday heroes #black man #damn fine

[prodigyduck]

Owen Stephens is a 25-year veteran of the tabletop gaming industry.

Owen has cancer.

Owen needs our help.

If you've played any of the the following games, then you've played a game that Owen helped write: The Black Company, Call of Cthulhu, d20Modern, Dragon Age, EverQuest, Fantasy AGE, Gamma World, Everyday Heroes, The Song of Ice and Fire, Thieves World, and Wheel of Time. I’m also the co-creator of the Starfinder and Star Wars Saga Edition rpgs

The Bundle has over $1000 of gaming products in it for only $30. Sales proceeds go to help fund Owen's medical bills.

#gaming #gamer #owen #owen kc stephens #owen stephens #fantasy age #call of cthulhu #d20modern #dragon age #everquest #gamma world #everyday heroes #song of ice and fire #wheel of time #starfinder #pathfinder #star wars #star wars saga #rpg #ttrpg #tabletop #cancer #cancersucks #cancer sucks

[justwriteyoudummy]

I'm writing a blurb about superheroes tonight apparently

The Leftovers:

Some people come upon their calling by pure hard determination and grit. Some come upon it by random happenstance, things in life just sort of click into place and they find their purpose as easy as that. The rest of us get stuck with whatever is left over. And let me tell you the leftovers are far worse.

Heroes. Everyone wants to be one. Everyone HOPES for a power from the roulette that will grant them the ability to save the day, get the spotlight, save the girl. You know the drill. But those poor fools who get the 'Leftovers'? The random and weird powers that no one really quite knows what to do with? Those powers that are deemed useless by society are shunned and discriminated against: heavily. Always knowing exactly what time it is no matter where you go or how many time zones you cross without looking isn’t the most popular when compared to the chick who can shoot lightning out of her fingertips.

Me? Yeah, I’m a Leftover, but don’t get me wrong, my power is useful in it’s own way: I can swap things. Yeah, swap things. I can take something and swap it for something else entirely. Doesn’t matter how big or small, I can take something from one place and swap it to another place.

The trouble began when I realized that my Leftovers worked on superpowers too.

#The Leftovers #Superheroes #Superhero #slice of life maybe #Superhero slice of life #everyday heroes #unedited because I'm just Bs-ing #but yeah #a premise mayhaps #something to write about #pantsing the hell outta this #Leftovers

[ashereggleston1990]

Despite My Numerous Disabilities, I have Managed to Teach as A Substitute Teaching Assistant at My Local School District for almost 5 years, now, I work with Early Childhood Intervention Pre-K Students 3-5 years old, General Education Pre-K Students, 1st-5th with Severe Disabilities and 9th-12th with Severe Disabilities & I used to work with Students in The Behavior Mastery Classroom, 1st-5th, and most recently, rarely with 9th-12th, Students in The Behavior Mastery Classroom!

#jobsuccess #true grit #overcoming #disabilities #determination #perseverance #persistence #overcoming depression #mind over matter #hard work #teachers #everyday heroes #essential workers #substitutes

[mallowjiccesyt]

Life Is Strange Remastered - Part 31 [PC]

Max warns everyone about Nathan. Victoria is next on the list to be kidnapped. Should Max warn Victoria about the impending danger that she might face?

Subscribe to my YouTube Channel: Mallowjicces YT

For Life Is Strange Remastered Gameplay, see this playlist:  https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLLIeDZMG-0ZA4Ewd56PikA4SijRpYziu

#life is strange #life is strange 1 #life is strange remastered #life is strange 1 remastered #lis #lis 1 #lis remastered #lis 1 remastered #vortex club #vortex club party #victoria chase #taylor #dana ward #max caulfield #chloe price #hayden #nathan prescott #mark jefferson #mister jefferson #everyday heroes #youtube #youtube video #youtube channel #gameplay #youtube gameplay #gaming #game #youtube gaming #video game #square enix

[daveydoodle]

Punnany Massif - Hétköznapi Hősök (official music video)

❤️ 🎶 🤍🎵💚

#music #hungarian #punnany massif #hétköznapi hősök #everyday heroes #Youtube

[freshchocolatemilk]

Me, seeing a poor fellow who fell on the pavement: :(

Me, a wonderful citizen:

#milk #he needs some milk #old man #everyday heroes #my post #silly #old man holding me #sharing is caring #take a sip

[walkawayinsin]

What is success?

Now when I am sitting by myself and practically moping about not reaching my goal about becoming an archivist, I realized an important thing:

“Damn I am such a snob!”

I am moping about maybe having to work in a grocery store. I am moping about working at a daycare instead of the museum. But I remember how I used to reflect if my work truly did anything important. In difference to daycare for example: you give other adults a chance to work and create an income for their family. You’ve got the chance to help little humans feel safe and grow in a safe environment. You get to see them change and evolve and you love it. Who cares if it’s not as rewarding. Yes, it hurts your body because you were a desk-worm. But the smile on those kids. The warmth you get from being able to help someone.  

My other dreams have just been ego-boosting missions in my life. It has been about me succeeding. And my ego got bruised – a lot. But it is bruised because I allowed it to. Life has given me so much. So many opportunities in life. And I just ignored it!  

But here it is! Here is life! Here it is offering you knew ways of living. You wake up without knowing what is coming next. A new adventure is on the horizon. So yeah, maybe I won’t stay at Åland islands for a while. Maybe I will stay but not work with what I have in mind but so what. Working with a “normal boring” job is a brave thing to do also. You might know it’s a thankless job and you don’t earn as much or gain any prestige from it. But you may contribute to much more than a CEO or a musician. The smile from a person when your work position helps them with something – it’s a special feeling.  

When you’re brave to face the drunk people at weekends to have a stable income for a while. When you try something out even if you’re scared; you’re brave as hell, and you live life to the fullest.  You’re the heroes this society doesn’t deserve. We need to support and give more cred to those who work within daycare, school, medcare, service-jobs etc. Without them society wouldn’t work out.  

#the true heroes #the real heroes #everyday heroes #thoughts on life #personal thoughts #meaning of life #universe #personal growth #have faith in life #the beauty of the earth #the beauty of life

[neverthelass]

#everyday heroes

[whatameshugenah]

Marie-Madeleine Jarret de Verchères. At age 14, with one old man and two soldiers, she fought off Iroquois warriors at her farm in Quebec (they got so close they pulled the handkerchief off her neck), fired a cannon to warn everybody, and told arriving soldiers where to go to save men who'd been captured.

They grew 'em tough back then. Happy birthday Ma'am.

https://www.thecanadianencyclopedia.ca/en/article/marie-madeleine-jarret-de-vercheres

#everyday heroes

[jaideepkhanduja]

Ramu Kaka: The Unsung Hero of Everyday Greatness – A Story of Resilience and Compassion #writeapageaday @Blogchatter

Ramu Kaka: The Unsung Hero of Everyday Greatness – A Story of Resilience and Compassion #writeapageaday @Blogchatter #Inspirationallies #EverydayHeroes #LifeLessons #CompassionInAction #Resilience #PersonalGrowth #Mentorship

Finding Inspiration in the Ordinary: A Tribute to Ramu Kaka In a world filled with noise and chaos, it’s often the quiet, unassuming individuals who leave the deepest impact on our lives. Among the countless faces we encounter, there’s one that stands out, not for fame or grandeur, but for the simple yet profound way they navigate through life. That person, for me, is Ramu Kaka. Ramu Kaka: A…

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#Compassion and Kindness #Everyday Heroes #Inspirational Stories #life lessons #Mentorship and Guidance #Personal Growth #Resilience and Perseverance

[luannudell]

Everyday Heroes and Angels Are Everywhere!

My recent post on NextDoor, a site that means well but often falls into hard places…. HEROES IN ODD PLACES II If you’d like to hear a happy post today…. I had just left my studio at the Barracks on Finley AVE today, and when I turned right onto Wright RD, I saw four dogs running loose down the street towards Hwy. 12. Two small cockadoodles (?), a small pug, and a larger red dog. I pulled…

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#angels in odd places #everyday heroes #look for the helpers #Mr. Rogers #runaway dogs #the kindness of strangers

[lavandamichelle]

Beyond Sheroes: Celebrating Everyday Black Magic in All Its Glory 

This Black History Month, celebrate the everyday magic Black women bring to the world! ✨ From scientists to grandmas, we're changing the world one laugh, one invention, one plate of greens at a time.

Hey friends, Lavanda Michelle here, ready to bust a myth bigger than Aunt Bertha’s Sunday hat! Black History Month ain’t just about dusty textbooks and tired statues. It’s about celebrating the everyday magic Black women weave into every moment. From scientists saving the planet to grandmas whipping up soul food that soothes your soul, we’re out here changing the world, one laugh, one invention,…

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#black history #Black women #celebration #Community #empowerment #everyday heroes #Inspiration

[nimixo]

Don't be a plain toast

There are no great people in this world, only great challenges which ordinary people rise to meet. -William Frederick Halsey Jr.

#EverydayHeroes #UnlockYourPotential #challengeyourself #RiseToTheChallenge #inspirationalquotes #personalgrowth #resilience #courage #Nimixo #motivation #motivationalquotes #MotivationBlowByBlow

#everyday heroes #challenge yourself #personal growth #resilience #courage #motivating quotes #motivation