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#give the man a dad award stat
rebouks · 2 months
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Previous // Next
[Robin scrambled over the back of the sofa and wedged himself beside Oscar, absently watching TV. Part of him hoped his father wouldn’t wake, but he was a notoriously light sleeper so the chances were slim. Sure enough, Oscar stirred, sleepily wrapping an arm around his son with a cosy hum] Oscar: Mmh-.. what time is it? Robin: I don’t know. Oscar: Late, then… [Robin shrugged a shoulder, the steady rhythm of his father’s heartbeat soothing his frayed nerves; he wished they could just stay like this forever-.. Oscar’s breathing softened as he threatened to drift off again though, reminding Robin why he’d clambered out of bed in the first place] Robin: Papa.. can I ask you something? Oscar: Anything. [Robin held his breath, readying himself for the inevitable barrage of Oscar’s unpleasant memories] Robin: Can you tell me the truth about what Larry said? I asked grandma, but she made me promise I’d ask you too-.. that you’d explain it better than her. Oscar: Is that what you’ve been thinking about this whole time? Robin: I don’t want you to die again… Oscar: I’m not going anywhere, I promise. Robin: You can’t exactly promise something like that. Oscar: I promise I’ll try my best not to, then. Robin: You still think about that sorta stuff though, don’t you? How do you know it won’t happen again? [Oscar sighed as he righted himself and settled Robin atop his knee, wondering what on earth Sidney had told him] Robin: She said you knew the risks-.. why’d you do it? Oscar: I wasn’t thinking straight-.. bit off more than I could chew. I was in a pretty bad place at the time. Robin: Why? Oscar: I like to keep things to myself, but it doesn’t do you any favours; I used to use all that nasty stuff to bury my feelings, to numb the pain it caused me to keep it all locked up n’ keep going. Robin: But everyone has secrets, don’t they? Oscar: They do, the fewer the better though-.. I think you’re as bad as me for bottling stuff up, but it’s so important to talk about things n’ let people help, ‘cause otherwise you’ll just end up finding unhealthy ways to cope instead. Robin: So, it happened by accident? Oscar: Yeah-.. it was pretty scary, to be honest. Robin: But it definitely wasn’t on purpose? Oscar: Sometimes I figured it’d be easier, but I didn’t want to die, no. Robin: I don’t want you to either, not ever. Oscar: It’s normal to be frightened of losing the people you love. Robin: Really? Oscar: Yeah-.. I used to worry about my grandad dying when I was your age. Sometimes it’d randomly pop into my head and I’d wonder what I’d do without him n’ get all pissy with everyone ‘til I could be alone, then I’d cry about it. [Robin felt a twinge of sadness yet smiled faintly, feeling slightly less weird for worrying so excessively] Robin: Sorry I asked grandma first… Oscar: It’s alright, being curious is normal too. [Oscar squeezed Robin tightly, semi-wishing he’d explained a little sooner; he was so mature for his age sometimes] Oscar: I’ll never ever be upset with you for asking questions, okay? There’s nothing you can’t talk to me about. Robin: I didn’t want to make you remember. Oscar: The past is what makes us who we are, buddy-.. I just hope I’ve made enough mistakes for the both of us…
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skalidra · 8 months
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Fic Writers Showcase Game
@there-must-be-a-lock tagged me!
Rules: Go to your published works on AO3 and list the first fic you ever published there, the last fic you published, any fic that you wrote for a fandom/ship only once, your favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship that has the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonized over the most, the fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason.
~~
First fic published on Ao3: That would be The Other Side of the Mirror, an Earth-3 continuity mess with a JayDick main pair, featuring Roy as a 3rd PoV. First chapter was posted in September, 2014, currently 200k, 20 chapters , and as of yet unfinished, though I think as it stands it ends on a decently hopeful note. I do still recall the main plot points of where it goes, and would like to finish it someday.
Last fic published: I posted the first chapter of Five Finger Discount just yesterday, which is the 5th piece in my Worth Counting series, an alpha!Slade/alpha!Jason series exploring a variety of kinks but with a focus on non-formal dom/sub vibes, competence/strength kink, and mostly-play fighting. (The last finished story was Shifting Into Fourth which is the 4th piece of that same series, so, I'm a little bit on a theme here.)
Fandom/ship I only wrote once: I uh. I wrote Hamilton/Jefferson/Madison room-where-it-happens porn. For the Hamilton musical. It's called Do Whatever It Takes and I think it is still the thing that makes me feel the most sinfully dirty of all the things I've ever written. So there's that.
I also have Let's Be Clear, which is my only fic set anywhere in the MCU, and is a Daredevil oneshot of an asexual!Wesley being invited to join a Fisk/Vanessa relationship, as I vibed real hard with Wesley as a character and never really got over his unfortunate demise.
(Honorable mention to my four stories that are technically fandoms of their own, but all fall under the 'DCU' umbrella, being for the Arkham games, two shows in the CW Arrowverse, and the Teen Titans cartoon.)
Favorite fic in most popular fandom/ship: This is a little hard to quantify. Technically 'DCU (Comics)' comes in at 93k in stories, which would make JayDick the most popular pairing, which makes my favorite story Captain's Privileges. It's a Star Trek mirror!verse fusion with Captain!Dick and Engineer!Jason and so many unhealthy relationships everywhere, and I love it.
However! 'DCU (Comics)' is a very broad umbrella and it's not really fair to say it's my biggest fandom, since the slice I belong to is much smaller. Which means the more accurate winner is Voltron, at 85k stories. I technically have a Klance story but given that it is a big poly clusterfuck dark!fic I really have to actually give this to the second most popular pairing by stat, Sheith. Out of those, I think my favorite is I'm Not That Man, which was an early false-memories/brainwashed!Shiro fic set just before the wormhole split them all up.
Fic I wish more people read: An Extra Shot, hands down. Come read my gen, Wilson-family-focused exploration of what happens if Adeline dies during the attack on Joey! Come read Slade Wilson being forced into confronting the fact that he is a terrible dad and also now a widowed dad of three kids! Come read Billy trying his best to bludgeon all the terrible communicators of this family into actually working things out! READ THIS. THERE'S A SEQUEL IN PROGRESS. IT'S GOOD I SWEAR.
Fic that was hardest to write: I think the award for this has to go to Me, Not Her, a CaptainPan/CaptainSwan piece which I was apparently so frustrated with at some point that I straight up deleted the file. Four years later (no I am not kidding) I had the vague memory of it. Some sketchy thing I could maybe expand, now that I was having thoughts about OUaT again. I pull it out of the (then eternal) trash of Google Drive. It is five thousand words long and needs no more than pretty basic editing and a little padding at the end to round it off. I don't know what the hell was happening with me when I deleted it, but wow, lesson learned.
Fic that popped out fully-formed: I don't recall any that were explicitly like this, but I also don't tend to write like, neat little packaged stories all that often. If I'm writing oneshots they're usually for events. So my best answer to this is probably Fucking Androids? It's a Reed900 relationship origin story that blazed its way out of me during NaNoWriMo one year, named entirely for the sex pun and then in the end absolutely refusing to have any sex in it, so it won that fight. I remember at least most of it coming really, really easy.
Fic I'm proud of: Pulling out a weird little one, here. I'm going to say Take a Ride. It's a JayDick, Gotham City Garage story that I wrote for Firefright's birthday one year, and on reread I actually still really, really like it? It's just a neat apocalyptic-desert vibe relationship building thing, set in the criminally under-explored and rushed GCG world, and I really like how I put Dick together in this one. I recommend it.
~~
Not tagging anyone specific, but if anyone would like to do this as well, feel free!
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jxxvvxxkcrack · 3 years
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Lee Jae Wook Vlive 21 June 2021
Stats
Total vlive viewers: 35675 Total likes: 2072339 Length: 1 hr 01 minute T-shirt: Unlock your life by Pars Co. https://www.parspars.com/product/unlock-your-life-rainbow-white-short-t-shirt/
He's on a diet now.
He threatened to turn off the Vlive a few times because of all the people who said they were not studying for their exams to watch it :P
He's growing out his hair now for the next project.
He had to ban requests for him to say fans' names in the middle since too many requests were pouring in for him to say their name. Don’t blame them lol.
Talking with fans
What is your next project? You should see articles about it soon Will you do more vlogs? It's difficult to do vlogs in the pandemic period since you need to wear a mask everywhere. What do you do in your free time? I eat a lot, sleep a lot, and exercise a lot. Can you donate your Jordan shoes to me? No I can't, and then launched into some anecdote about something about high school, which is unsubbed. When will you hold a fan meeting? Probably after the pandemic. "You're watching me at hagwon (cram school)? I will scold you!" And he did lol it was so cute. What do you do when you first wake up? A hot water shower, and then..? [unsubbed] Do you like overseas fans? Of course I do, I love my overseas fans. I'll come for you after the pandemic is over. Current favourite song: Recently, ‘Lost’ by Maroon 5 was released. It's the best. Will you do an online fan-sign event? That would be interesting! What's your MBTI? I haven't done it yet! Please do the MBTI! OK I will definitely do it! Can you do a bear heart? What's a bear heart? There's so much I don't know. Teleport vs being able to tell the future? This is an interesting question. I would choose to teleport. I live in the Gangnam area, and the traffic there is so bad! So I would choose 'Teleport'. (I didn't know he lived in Gangnam). Do you have a driver's license? Of course I do. Shoe size: 285mm Can you speak English? No, I can barely speak Korean well :P
-but in the middle he did say "Say hi to global fan" LOL-
Your favourite late night snack? Fried chicken, jokbal, and bossam. I spend a lot of money on food :P Would you date someone 7 years younger? 7 years younger? It's not a bad idea. I’m thankful (that someone 7 years younger likes me.) Would you date someone 7 years older? (laughs) It's a funny question. Why haven't you been seen anywhere in public? I don't go to many places, only to the gym and back to my home. Favourite snack: Goguma (sweet potato). It's sad, right? (Implying he's on a diet.) And then he randomly said he's tall but doesn't have good proportions (possibly someone asking why he exercises so much :P)
Do you like cats and dogs? I love them. I have a friend who has a shiba-inu called Chadol. It was so cute I went to his house every day to see his dog. You should eat more: You may not like me then! D: I'm studying Korean, study with me? I'm also trying to get better at Korean. Shall we do it together? (so flirty) Did you remove the mole on your neck? No, I didn't remove it. I won't remove it. What's your handphone wallpaper? It's a white wall with an orange stripe, somewhat Rothko-esque. He said he took it at his house's parking lot, and "It's pretty, isn't it?" Which celebrity friends do you have? (Playfully) 비밀 Do you like mint chocolate? I love mint chocolate. My friend told me not to declare this, and said that saying that I like it is a matter of life or death :P People say it tastes like toothpaste but it tastes nice to me! What colors do you like? Blue. Blue and dark colors. Isn't long hair uncomfortable? It is, but I will cut it one day. Your long hair looks cool: (Teasingly) I'm going to cut it soon~ Do you get along well with your elder sister?  Yes, I really like my relationship with her. Which of your characters is most like you? Lee Jang Woo from When The Weather Is Fine. (Is he that good in his studies? Lol. And then he said something about a unicorn, which I do recall seeing in the drama, I think he used "___ unicorn" to brag about himself to his younger sister :P) Jjajangmyeon vs bibimbap? This is really hard. Do I get to have soup with bibimbap? Favourite perfume: Can I say the brand? I guess it doesn't matter. Slow Dance by Byredo. It's my favourite perfume. Today's TMI: I woke up early and went to the gym. Do you ride your bike often? About 3 times a week? Oppa because of you I'm going to Chung Ang University: So you'll be my junior huh. (laughs) Oppa, can you close your left eye and point to your right cheek? (he obediently follows the prompt.. he’s really an actor lol) "You!! I almost fell for it! Gosh, my mum will pass out if she sees this." He revealed a two string bracelet on his left hand while adjusting the camera. Favourite dessert: Croffle? Croffle. I really like croffle. Current body wash: I'm using a body wash by Lush (only he says it as Lush-ee, which is just adorable.) Can you speak Japanese? I love animes but Japanese is so hard. I will study hard! When will you do a rap? I may try it one day. (I wonder if he knows about that old rap video floating around lol.) Dimples vs. Eyes: Eyes? I think he might be talking about his forehead wrinkles instead of eyes actually, so the translation is wrong. What animes do you like? He didn't answer, but said there are many animes on Netflix that he watches. Eating chimaek while watching the world cup? Eating chicken and beer sounds good but, my agency probably wouldn't like it. Can you say a line of Baek Kyung since it's been a long time? (playfully) I won't do it~ Iced americano vs. hot coffee: Iced americano. He said 'eoljuga', which roughly means 'I’ll drink iced Americano even if I freeze to death'. :P What app do you use most often? Naver? I have many things I need to look up :P Which of your parents do you resemble? Sometimes my mum, but sometimes my dad. Do you like kalguksu (knife cut noodle soup)? Yes, I love kalguksu and sujebi. Favourite ice cream flavour: Mint chocolate. (Bursts into laughter) Who do you like better - your mum or your dad: Omma. You thought I wouldn't answer, didn't you. (He has thanked only his sister and his mum in an award ceremony before lol. Poor Jaewookie appa) Oppa I'll date you: I'll reject your offer. (bursts into laughter again). Are you at the agency now? Nope. Please name the fanclub: This is hard. It (the fanclub) should go on forever, shouldn't it? Send an email to the agency. 5 year old Jaewookie vs 5 copies of Jaewook?: Of course 5 copies of Jaewook. One to exercise, one to work, one to stay at home and eat.. Do you dip or pour sauce for tangsuyuk? But, why would you pour water on fried food? I'll say dip. Jjajang vs. jjampong: That's hard! When working, jjajang. When resting, jjambong. *Nods sagely to himself* (Although he instinctively said 'jjampong' first). When moving house, jjajang. What message from fans cheered you up the most? It was this letter I got. It said "you make us happy when you're working hard, but don't work too hard." It cheered me up a lot. Soju vs. beer: Soju Cider (Sprite/lemonade) vs cola: Cola Do you eat pineapple on pizza? I think it tastes nice! Hawaiian pizzas. I also really like pineapple. Fall or spring? Fall. I really like spring too, but there are too many bugs. Small but definite happiness? (He understood the abbreviation immediately, which is sooo different from when the Running Man cast are introduced to any new lingo lol) When I bike, I don't drink any water. I have a routine; after biking, I run for about 6km, then I drink water. That water at the midpoint mark is so delicious. Oppa I like you, please scold me: Why would I scold you. I would compliment you :P Good job. Favourite boy group: BTS. They're so cool (safe answer!) Ramen vs. kimbap? Don't you eat them together? How tall are you? 187cm tall. Which variety show would you like to appear on he most? "I have never been on a variety show yet. Have you seen Kokkomu? When I watched Kokkomu I cried a lot. My tears came out like diamonds." lol. In reference to an earlier question. No idea what Kokkomu is. https://newsbeezer.com/koreaeng/kokkomu-which-was-just-popular-is-controversial-due-to-the-copying-of-the-youtube-channel/ Possibly this? Beef or pork? Pork How long have you been tall? I've always been tall. Then he gives a cheeky wink! Oppa can you go on on Knowing Bros? I'll have a hard time talking in banmal in front of all the sunbaenim. I'll do more Vlive in the future. *compromise* lol. Oppa kajimayo: If I don't leave, the staff can't leave work either :P Can you fill an hour (of Vlive?): Shall we fill an hour? Do you want to be in a play or musical? Of course I do. Plays require the best form of acting. What's the first thing you want to do when the pandemic is over? I want to go to a pork belly bbq place and eat comfortably without a mask. What's the worst part about acting? Every moment is hard. It's not an easy job. Why do you always wear 2 T-shirts? I like T-shirts but, but my sweat changes their color. I don't like that, so. Favourite overseas country? Filming Alhambra was my first time overseas. I didn't even take many photos. I want to send you T-shirts: Don't, don't! while vigorously shaking his head. (worried that his fans will spend money) What is your life movie? I really love Robin Williams. It's not my life movie, but I love the Dead Poets' Society. Did you really go to Alhambra? Back then, my role was really small, so I didn't really know what was going on, but (I did go to the palace? is what it sounds like.) Would you rather be 3m tall or have a 400mm shoe size? Wouldn't it be better to be tall? (what’s the point of having big feet?) Oppa don't go to the army: I have to go someday.. I still have a lot of time, and will work hard When will be our wedding? Am I getting married? (laughs) Pepsi or Coca cola: I like any cola. I'll go to the army for you: Andwae it will be hard! Although apparently it's not as hard as it used to be. Are your family members all as tall as you? Yes my family members are all tall too. What do you do on your free days? I'm a freelancer so I don't have free days.  How do you keep your skin looking so young? Lancome (he's now promoting Lancome). I came here right after a Lancome event. I really like Lancome. Tell me about your bracelet: I'll ask my stylist later :P When you come to Pohang I'll guide you!: I love gwamegi! (half-dried Pacific saury) Do you like to cook? I really like to cook. I love it so much even when people tell me not to cook, I will still cook. Oppa come to my school!: Which school is that? Tell me. Although I probably won't be able to read it. (cheeky smile). I'm really mean now, aren’t I. Favourite side dish? I like them all. Mokpo: Dodosolsollalasol was filmed in Mokpo. I ate aehobak jjigae (zucchini stew) there and it was amazing. Do Vlive at home? I'll figure out how to do it! I'll learn everything today. You use black and white hearts a lot on IG, what does it mean? It's the color of my tee. Just kidding, I just choose a color of heart that goes best with the photo. How much can you drink? Should I bluff? If I'm bluffing, when I drink alone at home, about 3 bottles? Just kidding, I get drunk after about 1.5 bottles (of soju). Favourite sports: Skiing, swimming, bowling. Was it hard to use a dialect in the Battle of Jangsari? Using a dialect was really hard. Can you do an IG live? I'm scared to do live - you can't make a mistake when all of you are watching. I have to be careful. Why aren't you seen in public? I answered that earlier, you are late. LOL. Your best dish? Western food? Something like risotto? Plans to film a movie? I want to but I should get offered first. Joking. Lol. I was told off for being late (the commenter above): Haha sorry.
Best fan questions/comments:
Live as a hamster or a ham forever?
Your pimples are so cute (mistranslation, she meant 'dimples'): "I have 4 dimples."
Don't smile, you'll give me a heart attack: I'm also having a heart attack seeing so many fans. I like it (that there are many fans on the vlive) but it's also scary. So cute.
Are you a microwave? You melted my heart: You're all so witty, jjinjjaru..
I'll make money. You just cook: You're so funny..
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umi-tama · 4 years
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October 4th 2011
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When I woke up today, I found a crying little baby girl. I decided to call her Luna, give her her uncle Brad's bass drum and her dad's old teddy bear (a present from his nanny back then; he never really liked it), and started to take care of her :) After getting sick and later going to bed, she evolved into Hitodetchi, got visited by her nanny, and presented with a new toy: a globe. She absolutely loves it ^^ The rest of the day she spent playing, practicing, and happily bouncing around on the screen. Here are her stats when she went to sleep: 0 yr, 10 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤ happy ❤❤❤O stress: 05 tone: 288 rhythm: 315 original: 406 genre: Asian Music
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When I went to the park with him today, he met Noda :) The were swinging a bit, and catching up with everything that happened, since the last time they saw each other. Noda told him about his gorgeous little daughter and was happy to hear, that she and Till already met and became buddies ^^ And that was already the most interesting thing, that happened today *lol* So here are his stats at the end of the day: 4 yr, 30 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤O happy ❤❤❤❤❤ train [▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▫▫▫▫▫] friendship ❤❤❤❤❤❤ gotchi points: 954,170 
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October 5th 2011
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Yesterday I left my tamas at home, when going to our weekly meeting at work. Unpaused. When I came back, Luna was crouching in a corner of her room, with a skull floating above her, three poops, a stress level near 50 and empty happy and hungry hearts. Apparantly I kinda like forgot, that she was only a toddler, when deciding not to pause her... uhm, oops? ^^' Anyways, shortly after I cared for her, she evolved into Ringotchi and a while later went to bed. Or so I thought. Because - being a typical teenager (who might've gotten a bit neglected by mommy...) - she actually sneaked out of her bedroom window, after I turned off the light! ò_ó' And you'll never guess where she went...
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During the day, not much happened for Till. He, too, got neglected a bit, but still had 2 full hungry and 3 full happy hearts and only one poop pile on his screen, after I came back from work. I cared for him, too, played his favorite game "Shoot The Bug" with him 
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and then both of us went back to minding our own businesses. When I saw him going to the park later that night (after his bath, even), I decided to follow him, though, curious if he'd even meet anyone there, since it was already dark outside. And he did. 
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I was shocked! Luna shouldn't be out in the park this late, not to mention how it is highly inappropriate for her, to meet up with older men there D: And today, after her first day at her new school (where she founded a band called Bara with a cute little Ichigotchi and an adorable Chamametchi), she met Till again. This time they not only built a sand castle at the park, but also went bowling, while I was sitting at home, not knowing where she is, and imagining the most awful things, that could've happened to her ~_~' Luckily - despite his punk-ish appearance - Till is a well behaved young man, so he brought Luna home after their secret little date, and we sat down and had a talk about the whole thing (after I sent Luna up to her room to take care of her homework). Apparantly he really really likes her, even though he's aware, that she's way too young for him. He told me, that when he went to the Date Place today and was offered a really beautiful Makiko there, he suddenly found himself thinking of Luna, and realized, that he would never be as happy with anyone else, as he could be with her. So he decided to wait for her to become an adult, and then tell her about his feelings, hoping she will feel the same. Yeah, well, how could I stay mad at him? It's not like anyone could control their feelings. So yes, I allowed him to once in a while take her out for bowling, but only after she's done with her homework and band practice, and only if he brings her home, before it's getting dark outside. (Of course I plan to continue keeping an eye on the both of them, nontheless. I'm not stupid, but well aware, that Luna is also crushing pretty hard on Till, and those teenagers... you never know what they're up to >_>'). I'm curious how their future will look like, with Luna aiming to become a famous musician and Till turning down all other marriage offers, until their age gap doesn't matter anymore. We'll see. So far, here are Till's stats at the end of today: 6 yr, 33 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤❤ happy ❤❤❤❤❤ train [▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▫▫▫▫▫] friendship ❤❤❤❤❤❤ gotchi points: 961,750 and here Luna's stats from tonight, after she went to sleep (and this time I checked, that she really stayed in her bed): 2 yr, 30 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤ happy ❤❤❤❤ stress: 00 tone: 418 rhythm: 505 original: 820 genre: Asian Music
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October 8th 2011
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Guess who evolved two nights ago? And guess who became one of my favorite Tama characters? Yes! Luna evolved into Makiko! I'm so happy. I love Makiko 💖 (Also now I know why the girl that Till met at the Date Place reminded him of Luna. Ha!) When she went to school, the jury was already awaiting her and her friends.
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Two Os, one X. No Pro-Debut. Meanwhile Till was waiting outside the school and later took her out on a nice, long date, to take her mind off from how her graduation went. Well, and this date ended exactly how I pictured it to end, if I don't keep an eye on those two... 
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I wasn't all too happy with Luna becoming such a young mom, but who am I to interfer with her life? She's an adult now, after all. Besides, her having a baby has a nice side effect: her stress level doesn't go up anymore. So I could have her practice for hours, which, by today, finally resulted in her band getting the Asian Music Award ^^ Afterwards (since I used up all her remaining concerts anyways) I already switched her instrument and toy to the equipment I plan for her son to have (as you can see above). Not sure yet of how to name the kiddos. Guess I'll decide that spontaneously ;) Here Luna's stats, right before she left her son: 3 yr, 37 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤ happy ❤❤❤O stress: 00 tone: 686 rhythm: 786 original: 999 genre: Asian Music star ranking: 4th tama fans: 238,519,542 And here Till's stats, before he left his baby girl: 8 yr, 32 lb hungry ❤❤❤❤O happy ❤❤❤❤O train [▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▪▫▫▫▫▫] friendship ❤❤❤❤OO gotchi points: 964,530 ~ Ah, yeah, and I still haven't managed to log into (or even sign up on) Music City. I tried InternetExplorer, Mozilla Firefox, Google Chrome and Safari. I cleaned my browser history and cache, I cleaned my flash cache, I even tried it with deactivated firewall. But I still keep getting either a blank page or this:
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... 😒
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hailqiqi · 5 years
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2019 Fic Round-Up
Writer buddies, let’s do this (as in, if you haven’t yet, do yours too!)
Stats:
(I’m going with a random quote from each one because I’m a fan of long summaries.)
Fics Posted (Gen): 3
A Little Taste of What Should Have Been
And that was how Pidge found herself kneeling sideways on the couch, face inches away from Lance’s shoulder as he disinfected first two sewing needles and then the earrings with a professional air.
Wriggle, Jiggle, Bake!
“Okay, so you’ve been magically de-aged — because apparently that’s a thing. Why is that a thing? Whatever. Of course it’s a thing out here."
Here
“Don’t make it weird, Lance,” she huffed, already tugging him into the room and closing the door behind them. “C’mon. I’ll help you wash all that off.”
Fics Posted (Plance Oneshots): 7
2 x 100 word drabbles
(Domestic Fantasy & Kabedon)
The Advantages of Being Small
“I couldn’t help it! It was just too tempting!”
Untangle to Wait, Unravel to See
Of course a fortune teller would appear as soon as he started talking about one. They were on a magical world with magical aliens and Lance was like, the hero of the story, so it made sense that events would be tied to his dialogue. Most importantly, it was not creepy at all, and anyone who said Lance was creeped out could go suck it.
the world is out there, my dear, but we're in here
Pidge froze. The reaction was so subtle that Lance would have missed it if he hadn't been watching for it -- she relaxed herself almost immediately, eyebrows raised in casual challenge -- but she'd reacted, all the same.
so it turns out I kinda missed you
Grumbling, Lance crossed his arms and sunk back into his seat. “I could’ve come to get her on my own, you know.” “Yeah, but then you wouldn’t be able to make out in the back seat on the way home.”
The Stars Aren't the Same for You and I
Dancing with Pidge was fun.
Fics Posted (Plance Chaptered): 2 (1.5?)
Skirting Katabasis
"So... Do you think you could put it back together?" Pidge tilted the tablet towards her and looked at him hard. His expression was hesitant, but his eyes were soft...almost pleading. She smirked. "Who do you think I am, Keith?”
The Future in Snippets (Chapters 3-5)
In truth, she had no idea what was fine. Her brain had switched off several heartbeats ago, but she couldn’t really find it in herself to care.
Fics Posted (Plance Collabs): 2
Smack, Kiss, Fall in Love (even chapters)
The prince doesn’t ignore the princess for the nerdy sidekick. Even if that sidekick was a badass fighter who’d saved his life countless times. Or a genius who constantly left his head spinning. Or totally into the same video games that defined Lance’s childhood, and the owner of a smile so blinding it made the stars look dim.
(shoutout to @sp4c3-0ddity​, my co-conspirator who made Pidge’s star so bright!)
It's Beginning to Look a Lot like A Christmas Carol  (Prologue & Chap 1)
“An intervention?” “Sure. Have you ever seen A Christmas Carol?” His mind freezes. “You mean the Dickens book?” “Uh…” Keith’s dad trails off, blinking. “No, the movie. With the little green man? I think they made a version with the grouchy duck, too.”
(shoutout to the awesome @rueitae​ and @sp4c3-0ddity​ who brought both the crack and the tears essential items for any Christmas party all we’re missing is the food fight and divorce)
Total Fics Posted: 14
Oooh wow. That’s more than one a month!
 Ship/Character Breakdown:
Ship Breakdown: Plance, with over 75%
[colleen image]
Character Breakdown: Pidge and Lance are in 100% of my fics. Hunk is next in 5 (with 1 POV!), then Keith and Allura both get 3 (both even get POV parts and Keith’s a major focus in Skirting Katabasis), then Shiro, Coran and Lance/Pidge’s families are more bit players.
I only just realized that the chapter in Smack, Kiss, Fall in Love is the only time I’ve really written Shiro. And now I’m horrified because Shiro was my first love.
Characters that had the Main Focus: 6 +1 Lance POV, 4+2 Pidge POV, 2 Switching POV fics and then the drabbles don’t count.  I actually started out the year tearing my hair out because I related to Pidge so much more, but now I really enjoy writing Lance. It’s actually a little tricky to get into Pidge’s headspace to work on my chaptereds sometimes.
Specifics
 Best/Worst Title?
Best Skirting Katabasis. C’mon. That’s like, literary (Katabasis being hell or destruction in Greek mythos). Worst Untangle to Wait, Unravel to See. I had help with it but this fic was just so hard to name.
Best/worst last line?
Best I tend to structure my chapters/one-shots around the last line so…this is hard.
"What took you so long? I've been waiting for you."
(Untangle to Wait, Unravel to See)
My personal favourite, though, is from so it turns out I kinda missed you:
Luis laughed. “Hi, Not-My-Girlfriend. I’m Not-His-Brother, Luis.”
Worst
Hunk just laughed. “You can’t fix that right now, so you might as well have some fun!”
(Wriggle, Jiggle, Bake!) So cheesey.
The last line that gives me personal arghs is from Here:
He buried his face in her sodden hair and cried.
...because a day after posting I realised that I should’ve written wept, dammit, and now it annoys me every time I see it.
Honourable mention to The Advantages of Being Small for winning the no-context award:
“Reckon I could fit three fingers up there?”
 General Questions
 Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?
Way more than I thought!  I think I had planned out about 8? Of those I wrote two (zine fics), started but haven’t finished 2, and the other 4 are still pending.
What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?
None, my obsessions are long-lasting and constant.
What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.
Skirting Katabasis or It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like A Christmas Carol. Though TBH I enjoy re-reading most of the stuff I posted in the last 6 months.
Okay, NOW your most popular story.
In every single metric on AO3 it’s The Future in Snippets. Y’all like your porn (even if there’s not much of it).
On tumblr it’s Wriggle, Jiggle, Bake! by like 100 notes.
Story most underappreciated by the universe?
If this is a roundabout way of saying ‘What’s your LEAST popular story?’ it’s The Advantages of Being Small, but TBH that’s a very short crack-ficlet so it doesn’t bother me (same with the drabbles).
If the question is “What fic do you think people should like MORE?” the answer is Skirting Katabasis. It’s fifth on the list for bookmarks and 9th for Kudos, and I’m not sure why?? Does it sound too gen? Do you not like Platonic Adventure Kidge? Honestly y’all are missing out it’s like the best thing I’ve ever written. Hands down.
Story that could have been better?
The Future in Snippets. Hands down. It was started on a whim, as a practice fic for another idea I’ve been nurturing for even longer, and back when I was newer at this writing thing. It wasn’t very tightly plotted – in fact the plot was expanded upon and changed multiple times before I settled on what I have now, several chapters in – and certain things that should have been seeded were left out of earlier chapters because I wasn’t experienced enough to figure out how to work them in and foolishly thought ‘oh, it won’t matter! Such a small detail!’, so now I’m scratching my head trying to figure out how to compensate.
I tend to work off very tight outlines, but Snippets was missing that for a large part of the process and I think it shows. I do think I’ve done a good job nailing the emotion in it, though, and that’s like 95% of the fic so as long as I keep that up it’ll all be fine.
Sexiest story?
The Future in Snippets is smut so… First place for SFW sexy goes to the world is out there, my dear, but we’re in here.
Saddest story?
I think The Stars Aren’t the Same for You and I wins because it’s a heartbreaking situation with no good resolution. There’s no comfort to be found there.
Most fun?
A Little Taste of What Should Have Been. It’s just…fun!
The most fun I had writing was Smack, Kiss, Fall in Love, because it was challenging, and I’d wake up every day excited to find out what had happened in the last chapter overnight.
Story with single sweetest moment?
The Future in Snippets (Chapter 4) 
“Um…” She turned the brush in her hands over again before holding it up sheepishly. “Do you remember how you said you’d braid my hair?”
Lance’s whole face lit up like a Christmas tree. “Really?!”
A giggle escaped her lips and she smiled, nodding. “Really.”
Hardest story to write?
The Future in Snippets. The emotions in this fic have become a convoluted mess and it is growing exponentially harder to write as I continue. I simply don’t have the level of skill required, but by God I will find it so that I can finish it properly.
Easiest/most fun story to write?
Skirting Katabasis!  The outline for this fic is tight, and I freaking love writing this fic. Like I just feel like smiling the whole process. I don’t know why. It feels like the wrong answer because it’s a fairly involved fic, but I just enjoy everything about it.
Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?
Smack, Kiss, Fall in Love actually gave me a much better understanding of Lance. Skirting Katabasis made me really look at Keith and realise that hey – the dude is actually very emotional, very chatty, and very soft (he’s so often typecast as the ‘moody loner’ because that’s what they call him in the show but he really doesn’t act like that).
Most overdue story?
Uh. The Future in Snippets was originally scheduled to be finished in January 2018, so… I also have a soulmate WIP which was meant to be for V-Day 2018.
Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?
I started to play about with other POVs, and discovered that I can write other POVs? I also did two collabs!  The first one I discovered that Reem really is a sweetheart, and with the second I discovered that either I’m really bossy or really persuasive or both maybe I should go into politics.
I also did a couple of events and zines and exchanges. I discovered that piece-writing – like writing with a target/deadline/outside expectation – does not agree with me, and I will no longer sign up for events/zines/exchanges.
What are your fic writing goals for next year?
1.     Finish my WIPs.
2.     Write my Pidge Makes Bad Decisions fic!
3.     That’s about it really. Can you take over the world by writing fic? If so, that’s going on the list.
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Bellow the cut are my spoilery thoughts after watching season 2 of the Tick
I’m kind of glad Dot turned out to have a super power because being the only hero with no powers is sort of Arthur’s whole thing. I also like that she didn’t outshine Overkill and just step over him, but still looks up to him a bit and appreciates his approval. They feel like equals, and he’s still an awkward turtle socially.
THEY WERE SO CUDDLY AND AWKWARD ON THE COUCH, Overkill is def the kind of guy who can’t move if there’s a pet on his lap. He’s so soft I can’t...
I LOVE that we get to see more of Joan and her relationship to her family, she’s awesome and I love and support her. She’s just doing her best, and I hope those lobster babies come to visit.
Superian and Larry’s relationship continues to baffle me just a bit. Larry seems to just be a willing servant to cater to his whims I guess. I kinda hoped they were more buddy buddy than that. Apparently it makes Superian feel better to toss him way up and catch him lawl
The way Hobbs reacted when Tick broke the arm wrestling machine thing makes me wonder if Tick is actually the strongest superhero in the world, maybe second only to Superian ??? Or at least the strongest ever registered with AEGIS.
I really, REALLY like Sage. He’s fantastic. He’s also really attractive, is it just me? DAT VOICE THO. [take me on a wild nipple ride! jk omg I’m sorry]
That twin woman who was impressed with Arthur’s nerdy organization came off as REALLY OBVIOUSLY flirting with him, and his reaction was to just shrug it off like he wasn’t in to her, even though she was gorgeous, and Tick immediately picked up on it that she was flirting and got DEFENSIVE AS HELL like she was taking Arthur away and I just-- that’s pretty gay guys. That’s really... wow. And then she comes back and continues to hit on Arthur and he never once acts like he’s in to her, I don’t... I don’t know what to say but if Arthur suddenly starts pining over her in season 3 out of no where I’m gonna kms [not because he’s not gay but because it’s pretty clear he’s not interested in this woman. Don’t establish this and then force romance after we’ve seen there’s none.] Also when Arthur was picking out fancy clothes Tick had REALLY specific fashion descriptions and opinions on what looked good on him. He was like enjoying Arthur modeling clothes ajdlfdjas
Someone needs to draw Overkill being lovingly rescued by dolphins STAT
I honestly, unironically, think Edgelord’s entire look is cool and he’s very handsome. I think he looks like if Johnny Depp and Adam Driver had a baby.
SUPERIAN FEARS THE TUMBLRS. We’re his kryptonite. 
Dangerboat... plane... whatever he is, kinda deserved a little more attention toward the last half of the season. The episode centered around him was the most emotional and it brought everyone together more, I really dug that. It made me cry. ALSO WE STAN MICHAEL, HE WAS TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD. I’m so proud of Arthur for seeing Dangerboat more as a person and making an effort to connect to him as a friend. <3 good job Arthur-- at the same time--
I HATE they way Arthur acted like Dot has a specific thing she should or shouldn’t be that was out of character. It’s like the writers wanted the female character to undergo some sort of oppression to rise up against, some form of misogyny from her male family member that she had to point out. You shouldn’t have to tear down a good character because he’s male, to make the female look good. If misogyny was gonna come out of Arthur, let it come out another way other than “this isn’t want you’re supposed to do” like mother fucker, she’s been taking care of you your whole life, she’s done martial arts training, she’s a paramedic, she is way more qualified than you. He’s the last person to talk that way to anyone and it’s pissing me the fuck off. He’s the one struggling with mental illness and no phyical ability to fight anyone, it makes no sense.
Arthur’s actor Griffin Newman, he just does such a fantastic job. The whole undercover scene was so perfectly on pitch, like... just the right level of second hand embarrassment and pride came outta me. He was so close to  blowing it because he’s an anxious person by nature, but he pulled it off and came off more as just an awkward criminal with tons of money that was just believably nerdy. I loved it, it was so funny. Please give him all the awards. And that scene where Tick is on one side of Lint, way too close to her, and Arthur is on the other, and they just work her forking nerves was so hysterical. I died. I think they need to play up that comedic chemistry more often because Tick and Arthur bounce off each other really well when they’re not busy trying to solve serious problems. 
Ok so the whole human furniture thing caught my eye immediately. The pose we are first introduced to is an infamaously disturbing pose by a real life serial killer who ate people and posed their bodies in weird positions and used them for sex and I forget what else. Anyway I tried to brush that off as coincidence, but then later on Dot and Overkill go to where they think this Duke guy’s lair is, and his house looks exactly like John Podesta’s house that had a statue of that EXACT same serial killer’s victim in that pose, and podesta’s walls were covered in creepy pedo art of little girls and drowning women. And the walls of Duke’s lair were covered in creepy human furniture art. I mean there are all kinds of parodies this season that are in your face, but I don’t think anyone who didn’t follow pizzagate carefully would catch this one.
Speaking of parodies OMFG I lost it when Superian reenacted that Superman scene where he’s like “Can you read my mind?” as he’s dragging the screaming guy across the night sky. 
Ugh, I’m so sad that Tick and Arthur don’t get to keep those precious baby lobsters, and where did they get all the cute toys?? I wanna think Joan picked those up for them. Kawaii lobster voice: “Joaaan!” Tick is such a good dad...  A family can be a giant Tick man, a moth boy, a hobo, a mimaw, and a bunch of singing lobsters. "SHE'S THE MOTHER OF OUR CHILDREN!" Tick drinks respect woman lobster mom juice.
I think I don’t know what to make of the reverse Green Goblin twist going on with Ms. Lint. The creepy voice is telling her to become a hero I guess, but not really? I think the joke is we think it’s telling her to be a hero, but really it’s teaching her to be a  better villain LMAO
I’m glad kevin has a power and he was welcomed to come help even before said power was revealed.-- woah wait where tf is Karamozov?? I gotta tweet his actor he loves this show and he wasn’t in this season ???
I don’t blame Dot for being upset they want to defrost The Terror, but at the same time due process is a thing. I don’t know how that would work in a society full of super powers though. Because the moment you defrost him he’s going to find a way to escape. He’s the oldest, and the worst super villain of all time. This is why I’m ok with the death penalty and killing villains lol
I was expecting Walter to be some sort of MK Ultra sleeper agent, but the plot twist was, that’s what Overkill would become I guess. And Lobstercules. OH BTW I think she’s voiced by the same actress who played Captain Liberty in the old Tick sitcom! “Walter isn’t Walter? My feet don’t feel so good.” Aw Tick
Ty Rathbone drinks respect mothers juice.
Acting agent commander doctor agent Hobbs, honestly I suspected he was the main villain like the moment he was headed toward Lobstercules because something about the lighting and the camera work seemed to telegraph that.
I bet the reason Ty Rathbone feeds his black hole heart monster mice, is because it requires frequent blood sacrifice and that's the smallest sacrifice he can think of that he can quickly just put in there and placate it and go on with his day. I don’t know if he’ll be season 3′s villain or if it’s the aliens that just came back to reclaim Superian. 
Which btw, I called that shit from season 1 episode 1. Superian showed up crash landing inside Big Bismuth which is the only thing that could trap him. He was a prisoner, probably because he did some bad shit, and he told Arthur he helps humanity because he just wants to be a good person. Like he wasn’t one before and now he wants to try to be one.
I want to talk about these, nearly involuntary dance parties Overkill rewards himself with... but I uh... I still can’t compute that that’s actual canon. That that’s a thing Overkill and Dangerboat enjoy together and he... he can’t seem to control himself when the music plays... And also that Dot AND Overkill both know how to floss dance... I just... wow...
Oh and that hug with Overkill made me an emotional mess, he just... he really needed that, thank you Dot.
This concludes my rant and ramble.
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pinkletterday · 6 years
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Legends 4x2 highlights:
- Constantine essentially being the Spike of the Time Scoobies
- Constantine being the new Mick
- Constantine completely flummoxed by Cinderella's singing godmother and Sara and Mick's expressions of deep disgust.
- MORE BIFF!
- The unlikely team up of Nate and Ava Sharpe. I regret disliking this guy when he first showed up. I'm downright fond of him.
- I want to give the guy who plays Gary Green an award.
- "WHAT PRICE MY NIPPLE??" - Gary, forever probably
- Tying the Salem witch trials and Jane Hawthorne to Zari's situation was genius. I was legitimately moved.
- And also rooting for the fairy godmother to burn all the fuckers down, personally, but Zari decided no so I'll back her play since its her call
- Totally wanted to see her throttle that kangaroo court to death but her sudden realization that she had become exactly the kind of monster they thought she was hit me hard.
- You guys I love Zari so much. I would protect her with my life.
- Always love watching Sara mentoring Zari but I wish they'd given it a little more weight. I think this was the first oblique reference we got to Sara's Dad being dead.
- How Fox News is like an Evil Fairy Godmother. I'm taking this as an object lesson on the dangers of soundbite journalism.
- Only this show would give me genuine emotional conflict and then Ray and Mick being turned into pigs.
- And Nate understanding Ray talking pig at him. I have no idea how that pig manages to capture Ray's natural earnest demeanor.
- Seriously I need to smoosh those piglets.
- And Ray ending up naked in Nate's arms. That is like a series high point.
- I did not know that the Time Bureau was funded by the DOD, nor why it has to be in 2018, but like 4.6 bil is chicken feed for the American military so why not.
- That said, these guys have no idea how to pitch to them. For the American military its not about whether a threat does exist, its about whether said threat could profitably exist.
"Senator, we can't let the Russians weaponize unicorn vomit before we do!"
"The Russians know about this?"
"Probably. The Russians know everything. As an aside you could also drop it in the water supply of some South American country and install a puppet dictator in exchange for a valuable trade agreement. If we were the kind of people who did that sort of thing."
- Between this and the reference to finances on the Flash last week, its like the concept of money has arrived on the CW.
- Awww Nate don't leave the Legends! You're going to break your best buddy's heart! You wouldn't do that to the resident sunshine puppy would you?
- I do think that Nate will want to back the fuck away when Amaya's double comes on the team. That'll be so weird for everyone.
- That last sad man-hug shoulder bump though. Idk how it looked so much like an emotional love confession.
- OKAY NOW I NEED MAISIE AND KEIYNAN BACK STAT.
- Aw right! Second ep knocked out of the park as well! Puritannical witch hunting, evil singing fairy godmothers, awkward Biff-son bonding, a commentary on Islamaphobia, Ray being literally a Babe and accidental homoeroticsm. This show is a gift and everyone who doesn't watch it are sad people.
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likeshipsonthesea · 6 years
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It’s Not Gay
Here’s the third in the bi trifecta, Holster! Warning for homophobia and homophobic language. Also slightly NSFW but only for a second.
“It’s not gay,” Quad said, pressing Holster back into the sheets. He was smaller than Holster-- most people were-- and he could’ve easily pushed Quad off him, but Holster liked the weight of Quad’s muscled body over his. “All the guys do it,” Quad said, going for Holster’s shirt, pushing it up his stomach. Holster shivered as Quad’s hand brushed his abs. “It’s just a way to blow off steam,” Quad said, and Holster felt how hard he was against his hip.
“So... it’s okay?” Holster had been around high school aged boys enough to know that gay was synonymous with uncool, annoying, wrong. He’d only been with the Hawks for a month and a half, and though he didn’t exactly get all of the intricacies and hierarchies of the team, he knew that the connotations that went with the word “gay” were familiar enough.
“Yeah,” Quad said, as he fumbled with his own pants. He was two years older than Holster and knew more about the world. So Holster believed him when he said, “As long as we don’t kiss, it’s fine.”
So that was the rule.
A lot of the time, Holster roomed with Quad, as d-partners were more likely to get along in the manager’s mind. They didn’t mess around every time, but they did more often than not. Holster didn’t bring it up to any of the other guys-- “Don’t talk about it, that’s just weird,” was another piece of wisdom imparted to him by Quad-- and none of the other guys he roomed with suggested it. Holster assumed that they had their own buddies to mess around with.
Not that it was exclusive. No, Holster learned that one night after a hard game when he’d stopped by Quad’s single room to see if he was up for “letting off some steam” only to find one of the second-line forwards already there. Holster went back to his room with a hollow spot in his chest that he filled with reiterations that it wasn’t a relationship, they weren’t together, it wasn’t love.
Still, Holster found himself fascinated with kissing. During the rare times they had a chance to party, he would always talk up a girl until she giggled sweetly into his mouth. He liked it, liked kissing girls, a lot. Their lipgloss always tasted nice and their hips fit in his hands so soft and curvy and the way he had to tilt his head down towards them, them lifting their faces to his, felt like solid footing, equal ground, something more than muffled moans into borrowed pillowcases.
Sometimes he hooked up with them. He was still young, insecure, but the older guys would guffaw and toss him a little metallic packet and he’d bluster with it but tuck it away in his pocket and swear to himself he’d use it. It got empty after a while, though, sleeping with girls when they were on the road, getting their numbers but never really talking to them after the bus had left.
When the season ended and he went back to Buffalo, he spent most of his days at the movies or the library, catching up on the media he’d missed during the season. At the library one day he met a girl with a tinkle of a laugh and the dirtiest mouth he’d ever heard and he asked her out for a movie, and things progressed from there. Stephanie was bold, loud, and beat Holster in burping contests without even trying. She was perfect.
Well, almost. “I can’t believe you like those girl movies,” she’d say, whenever Holster was in a rom-com mood. When Holster cried, at a book or a film or a really pretty flower he saw on the side of the road, she told him, “Stop being such a wimp.” One day when she was doing her nails, he teased her to do his too and she frowned deeply at him. “Don’t be gay, Adam.” 
The word wrinkled. He wasn’t gay but.
(He didn’t like to finish that sentence. Quad said messing around wasn’t gay as long as they didn’t kiss, but sometimes Holster would stare up at his lips and wonder how different it would feel to kissing a girl, how similar it might feel, too. He wanted to know so much that he daydreamed about it sometimes, drifting off during practice and conversations, wanting it to the point of aching. That broke the rule, right? Wanting to kiss a guy was gay, right? 
So Holster didn’t finish the sentence, because he was terrified that it ended with but I’m something.)
Still, Stephanie was great. When Holster went back to Waterloo for training camp, he cried as he said goodbye to her. She rolled her eyes and kissed his cheek and said, “We can pick it up when you come back, if we’re both still single.” He liked her, but he didn’t think they’d get back together. She was a person to him and he enjoyed her company, but the biggest thing he got from their relationship was the assurance that he wasn’t gay, which, at the time, meant everything.
Things were different when Holster got back to Waterloo. Quad had transferred over the summer to another team. Holster’s new d-man was a quiet guy named Sean with dark eyes and a wide smile. He didn’t propose any kind of similar arrangement to what Holster’d had with Quad, but Holster liked him too much to risk asking about it. They hung out whenever they could, snuck into each other’s rooms to watch 30 Rock together, had all these crazy inside jokes.
By December, Holster realized that he liked Sean. Like, gay and shit.
When he went home for Hanukkah, he was mopey. Mom tried to ply him with food and Dad wouldn’t stop talking hockey stats and Esther and Sarah were only interested in him for as long as it took to give them their presents and then went back to whatever it was middle schoolers were interested in. Ruth, Holster’s twin, didn’t say anything, but when night fell and the house was quiet, she snuck into his room and sat at the foot of his bed. “What’s wrong?” she asked, her voice a whispered demand.
He sat up and sighed. “I think I like my d-man.”
He watched her frown at him through the hazy light of the moon. “Like, like-like?” He shot her a look and she held up her hands. “Okay, okay.” She dropped her hands and one curled around his ankle over the blankets. “So you’re... gay?”
“No, no. I.” He swallowed and stared at his hands. “Maybe? I don’t know.”
Ruth was quiet for a while. Then she said, “You know, if you were gay, it wouldn’t be, like, a bad thing.” Holster glanced up at her, frowning. She had that same look on her face she did before cutting her own hair when she was six, and that time they made brownies and ruined the kitchen when they were eight, and when she told off those guys in middle school who said Holster was a wussy ‘cause he cried at the “Ohana means family” scene in Lilo & Stitch. She said, “It’s not, really. I know people are dicks about it but it’s perfectly okay. Love isn’t bad.”
“But--”
“No buts, dickwad. I’m right and you can’t argue.” Ruth was frowning at him so hard that Holster couldn’t help but laugh. It bubbled out of his chest like relief and Ruth had never been able to stay calm when he laughed so they both started giggling uncontrollably, falling into one another, and Holster was just so happy he couldn’t stop. The light suddenly turned on and Mom was in the doorway yelling, “Just what on Earth do you two think you’re doing up this late?” and still they couldn’t stop.
Holster went back to Waterloo feeling much better. He still didn’t think he was gay-- he liked girls wholeheartedly which he was pretty sure was a big No in the gay handbook-- but the idea that even if he was, it wasn’t a bad thing, settled on his shoulders like armor.
One night soon after that, there was a knock on his door late at night. The game they’d played was a good one, and Holster’d been awarded the single for the night. Still, he was sore when he got up to answer the door and was slow getting there. When he did eventually pull it open, Sean was there, with a blanket, a pillow, and a scowl.
He barged in muttering something about his roommate. “What’s wrong?” Holster asked, closing the door behind Sean.
“Ewing is fucking Hays in our room,” he said, nearly spiting the words. He set up his blanket on the floor next to Holster’s bed. Holster watched, his whole body tense.
“Oh.”
Sean huffed. “Yeah, fucking inconsiderate. He knows we have an early depart time and he doesn’t know that I have a place to sleep.” He shook his head, setting his pillow at the top of his blanket.
Holster coughed. “I don’t know, he probably needed it if he kicked you out and everything.” Sean darted a look at him, so he continued, “You know, blowing off steam and shit.”
Sean squinted at him. “What?”
Holster felt his face warm as he blustered. “It’s not-- it’s like stress relief, you know. A lot of the guys do it.” Nervous, he added, “It’s not gay unless they kiss.”
Sean stood and came closer, not incredibly but more than Holster felt comfortable with at that moment. He had a strange look on his face. “That’s not how it works, dude.” 
Holster stared back. He’d had a suspicion that maybe Quad’s take on everything wasn’t exactly kosher but to hear it from Sean was shocking. They’d never talked about it-- Holster being too terrified to ever try and bring it up-- but Sean didn’t seem grossed out or whatever right now. If anything, he seemed kind of... flirty?
Sean’s lips quirked into something like a smile. “Have you... “blown off steam” with anybody?”
“Um, what, no-- I--” Holster coughed and Sean took half a step closer. Holster watched him, frozen. “I-- yeah.” He swallowed. “Yeah.”
Sean’s smile widened and Holster couldn’t stop staring at his mouth. “But you’ve never kissed a guy, then.”
“Um.”
“Do you want to?” What the fuck. Holster was hyperventilating so he couldn’t manage to say yes what the fuck holy fuck yes please, but he did manage a fairly panicky nod. Sean laughed, soft and breathy, and took one step closer until he was right there and he lifted a hand to Holster’s cheek to bring him down to Sean’s mouth and--
And they were kissing. At first, Holster tried to catalog the differences from kissing a girl-- lips aren’t as wet, stubble is a bit rough, hand is firmer on his cheek-- but within moments he was melting into it and too distracted to think of anything except Sean’s mouth.
It was late, and they did have an early wake-up call in the morning, so they made out for a little while and then went to bed. Sean slept in the bed with Holster didn’t even say “No homo” when he threw his leg over Holster’s hip under the blankets. Holster still ended up tired in the morning because he spent so long staring at the ceiling with a stupid grin on his face.
When they got back to Waterloo, Holster was forced to go back to his host family’s house without a chance to be alone with Sean. He couldn’t get the grin off his face, though, and his host family was a little confused but they didn’t ask, which Holster was thankful for.
Before bed, Holster called Ruth and told her what had happened. “You probably froze like an idiot,” she said through the phone, and he could just see the shitty grin she was probably wearing
“Screw you,” Holster grumbled, though even his sister’s teasing couldn’t dampen his mood. He grabbed his toothbrush and squeezed some toothpaste onto it. 
“You’re lack of game aside, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Wha’s’tha?” Holster asked, shoving the toothbrush in his mouth.
“I’ve been doing some research on your situation.” That sounded ominous but Holster made a noise urging her to continue. “So you like guys right?” Holster made an affirmative noise. “But you also like girls?” Holster repeated the noise. “Okay, so I don’t know how you feel about it specifically, but there are two words I think that would describe you.”
“Wha’ are d’ey?” Holster swallowed a bit of toothpaste and coughed.
“Well, they both basically mean the same thing, but you can look them up for yourself. There’s pansexual-”
“Like a pan?” Holster asked, spitting into the sink.
“No,” Ruth said, sighing deeply. “God, you’re ridiculous. No, it’s a root word meaning “all”. So all genders.”
“All? Aren’t there just, like, two?”
“No, there’s more. It’s really not that complicated, I advise you to search it for yourself.” Holster made a note to do exactly that. Ruth was usually right about these things. He tested the word pansexual, saying it to his reflection. He shrugged. Felt as right as gay ever had.
“What’s the other word?” he asked, grabbing a towel to wipe his mouth.
“Bisexual.”
It was silly. It wasn’t like he knew the minute differences between the two words, or what bisexuality exactly entailed, but when he heard the word, and then repeated it to himself, it felt like it fit. Like, some kind of no-look pass that ended in a goal, like instinct, like understanding. Bisexual.
“Huh,” he said, and Ruth huffed a laugh over the line.
(Years later, Holster found himself laughing ridiculously in the middle of one of Shitty’s rants about how bi people in het relationships were still queer and belonged in LGBT+ circles just as much as anyone else. Shitty was initially offended, thinking Holster a bigot or something, but in reality he couldn’t stop laughing because Quad had been right when when he said that it wasn’t gay. It was bi, because Holster was bi, and therefore everything else he did was bi.)
(While the team was proud of him for being so content with himself, when Holster began to put the word “bi” before all of his actions-- “I bi-passed the puck” “I bi-stayed up all night bingeing Brooklyn Nine-Nine” “I bi-wrote the fuck out of that essay”-- it very quickly got old.)
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artfullycurs · 6 years
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hey, it’s your friendly neighborhood blob named Bloo~ here’s a lil bit about my son, Zeke!
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⸢ BOOBOO STEWART, 25, CISMALE, HE/HIM ⸥ — well, that looks like ( EZEKIEL “ZEKE” GRAHAM ), that ( GRAPHIC DESIGN STUDENT ) living over in ( SOUTH CONGRESS ). they’ve called austin home for ( 3 YEARS ) now, and i hear you can usually find them at ( HOMESLICE ). people say they’re ( BIG-HEARTED ) and ( PASSIONATE ), but that they also can be a bit ( AWKWARD ) and ( UNWORLDLY ). they remind me of ( LATE NIGHTS HEAVY WITH THE SCENT OF COFFEE, HANDS SMUDGED WITH CHARCOAL, FLUSTERED GRINNING ). — ⸢ BLOO, SHE/THEY, 23, CST ⸥
BIOGRAPHY:
TRIGGER WARNING: Death mention.
Zeke was born in the bustling city of New Orleans though he barely remembers it. The clearest memory of his early years were when he spent afternoons in his mama’s flower shop, helping arrange bouquets until his pops got home from work. The second clearest memory? When the storms came... the small family had tried their best to escape it, but the storm landed too quickly, and they were too late. That week, Zeke lost everything he’d known up to that point was lost to the floods, including his mama, whom was swept away from his and his pops’ hands while they were trying to hold onto the roof of that old shop, trying to wave down rescuers. For a while, all that came afterward was a blur.
The next thing he knew, they were in a completely new place, almost empty-handed -- the government at least proveded him and his pops a new apartment they didn’t have to pay for for a year, secured a job for his pops at the VA hospital in nearby Muskogee. While Tulsa wasn’t awful, gone were the familiar bayous he’d grown up being surrounded by, the blaring sun that brought people out of their houses and onto the streets, all the how y’all doin’s, the smiles on all faces young and old. Despite the sadness that swelled inside, Zeke kept a positive mental attitude. He came to also love the rolling hills, the endless plains that swallowed up the landscape wherever people weren’t.
The few years he’d spent outside, playing ball with neighboring kids on old lots in New Orleans came full circle when he joined the baseball team during high school, and boy, was he good at it. Within a year’s time, he qualified for the varsity league and, two years after that, his school had taken the state championship trophy home for the first time. Of course, everyone came flocking for the winning boys after that, but Zeke had his mind set at the time on taking a few years off to help his old man with the bills. Four years of working odd jobs around the city, he’d saved enough money to move them out and back somewhere south. Though his pops didn’t want to go back to New Orleans, per se, they played a little throwing dart roulette and found a new destination in Austin, Texas.
As soon as they’d settled in that summer, Zeke strode right into the dugouts of both St. Edwards University and the University of Texas to try out, prove that his powerful strikes at bat and the way he ran like there was no tomorrow were still intact even though he hadn’t been back on the field for a while. Though both were willing to give a full ride scholarship for his skills, he chose St. Edward’s in the end; while it wasn’t a top tier university by any means, the moment he met their coach and saw the way their team’s dynamic worked, he knew he wanted to be there to help them grow, knew that they would help him grow.
Three years in, and he loves how things are right now. He not only is the right-hand man to the curren team captain, but a new passion had kick out most of the darkness that lived inside his soul and replaced it: art. Something about the quirkiness of the city’s layout, the way even the busiest streets always were alive and full of color inspired something within. Even though most of his afternoons are spent washing dishes and sometimes bussing tables at Home Slice, Zeke can’t help but take late night, or weekend if he has time off between games, strolls and drives on his bike just to see the variation in design from building to building, street to street. He’s beginning to call this place home.
click anywhere on this line for stats!!
WANTED CONNECTIONS:
ROOMMATES (2-3 PEOPLE): His dad lives over on the outskirts of the city towards San Marcos, so he needs a place to stay while over at South Congress and, well, rent isn’t cheap when you’re along one of the busiest streets in the city. Anyone that’s a student in the area could be his roomie tbh, Zeke isn’t picky! He’s a pretty chill dude that’s barely there most days, always practicing or working to help pay the rent. Only times he really is around is to cook breakfast (his main duty lbr), tidy up the common area and wash dishes when it’s his turn, and sleep.
BASEBALL TEAMMATES (& ALUMNI), BASEBALL PLAYERS/LOVERS: There’s nothing like America’s favorite pastime to bring people together, especially when it comes being on the team itself. Zeke’s taken and given advice all three years he’s been playing for the school, and I’d love to see a mixture of interactions over the sport. So even if they’re not at St. Edward’s, he’s all about helping other people reach their potential, and just talking about the game in general?? Like. Lbr, one of his perfect dating scenarios is going to the batting cages and competing over who can make the most successful bats... or, well. Helping someone make power hits like him since that involves getting physically close to assist their form and he’s cheesy like that.
REGULARS AT HOME SLICE PIZZA: To say the least, Zeke’s part of one of the friendliest kitchen staff on the block. There’s even an award for that, no joke. Even though most of his time is spent behind the scenes, washing dishes and drying them out to stack onto the shelves so they’re ready to go for cooks and servers, he’s been on the floor to help pick up dirty dishes once people leave, clean and clear out tables for the next group coming in. Breaks are usually spent on the back patio, where he loves to look at the lights and colorful decorations, gather inspiration to journal and sketch about. Feel free to have people chat him up while he’s there!
hit me up at @dagohoydared#8007 on Discord if you wanna plot!
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amandarakel · 6 years
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Women (and their lack of presence) in the music industry
Two weeks ago, I had the great opportunity, when I was invited by Hult’s global women in business club, to lead a panel discussing diversity in the music industry. I sat with five industry people, discussing the uphill battle many women and coloured people face trying to get a foot in the door.
The way we sat as a panel was in itself a reminder of the reality. In a half circle, we sat as follows (*names changed): Amy (female), Harry (black male), Trent (white male), Ally (female), Kit (black male) and myself (female). Trent had plenty of experience working with major labels and big industry names. The other panelists worked for independent labels, their own startups or minor labels. 
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Danish Tabloid DR: “Women snubbed at the DMAs: Men took home all the prizes” https://www.dr.dk/nyheder/kultur/musik/kvinderne-fik-lang-naese-til-danish-music-awards-maendene-tog-samtlige-priser
The panel confirmed the reality: To get into the music industry as a woman, is incredibly difficult. Especially when you don’t fit the cookie-cutter norm. While it was depressing to hear the stats, it was also re-assuring to know I’m not crazy, and that this inequality is actively taking place.
As a female artist trying to break into the Danish music industry, I was dismayed when all 12 prizes at the Danish music awards, back in November 2017, went to men. At the Grammys this year, only 17 of the 86 prizes handed out, were given to women. Of the awards televised, only one went to a woman (Alessia Cara).
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Danish tabloid Ekstra Bladet: “Danish Men Awards: The women were completely forgotten” https://ekstrabladet.dk/musik/dkmusiknyt/danish-men-awards-kvinderne-blev-totalt-glemt/6911642
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CNN: https://edition.cnn.com/2018/01/29/entertainment/grammys-2018-gender-gap/index.html
Half an hour before the panel took place, I looked at Spotify’s hit charts for Denmark and the Global Top 50 chart. I also looked at the US iTunes store top 50 songs, and Danish iTunes store’s top 50 songs. The numbers weren’t any better there. While 15 women were featured in the top 50 on Spotify’s global playlist, 9 were featuring with a male artist. This was a reoccurring trend in the other playlists. On average women featured in just 24% of the playlists.
That’s shocking, especially for Denmark. Growing up I often thought of Denmark as a place of progressive equality. Then I moved there, and entered the music industry. And it’s just as stuck-in-the-mud as the rest of the industry.
I read a Danish article defending the DMAs, saying that female musicians don’t take enough risks. That’s interesting, because if you go through the top Danish songs occupying the charts, most the songs resemble each other. In fact, below is a screenshot of Denmark’s Top 50 Spotify Chart.
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No women are in the top 10 (note how the first glimpse of a female artist is Cardi B and it’s she’s featuring on a Bruno Mars track). The following Danish artists featured in the top 10 are: 
Gili - Langsom 
ZK - ZUM ZUM 
Sivas - Sidste Time
NODE - JVB 
KESI - Ligesom Mig 
All are male rap artists. If you listen to the songs, they are all quite similar with heavy auto-tune vocals. How is that original and/or risk taking? This is not to say that the songs aren’t good, or aren’t catchy, but they certainly don’t do anything risky. It seems like record labels have found a formula that works, and they are sticking to it. Unfortunately, this formula isn’t very inclusive.
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Rolling Stones reporting on the Grammys: https://www.rollingstone.com/music/features/grammys-disappointing-night-for-women-w516065
Another argument I’ve heard, is that female artists didn’t produce any new material, thus couldn’t be nominated. You can’t take that at face value. The industry is awash with artists trying desperately to get heard. And amongst those artists, a lot of female artists. I’ll be the first to acknowledge that the music industry, like any other industry, is cluttered with mediocre talent. But I refuse to believe that there aren’t talented women in the music industry who are eager to be signed and have their material produced. The lack of material from female artists, in my opinion, is an issue rooted in record labels not signing and/or giving enough attention to female artists.
So what does all this mean? Well, there is blatantly an inequality issue. A word that came up a few times throughout the panel, and one that I’ve heard a lot in tandem with getting into any industry, is “gatekeepers”. A form of gatekeepers are CEOs of record labels. Generate a quick google search of that, and what do you get? A list of primarily white middle-aged men. 
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Google Search: “CEOs of Record Labels” https://www.google.co.uk/search?rlz=1C5CHFA_enGB778GB778&ei=hXV4WtWROsSmwQLzoIfADQ&q=ceo+of+record+labels&oq=ceo+of+record+labels&gs_l=psy-ab.3..0i71k1l4.1641.1641.0.1745.1.1.0.0.0.0.0.0..0.0....0...1c.1.64.psy-ab..1.0.0....0.srZRTDd0FtI
I’m not a man hater. I love my brother, I love my dad, I love my uncles and my grandpa, my cousins and my male friends. I have deep respect for many male professionals But this is still a man’s world. I’ve met so many incredible women who are trying to carve out a way for other women, but we can’t do this without the help and acknowledgement from men. I don’t think these gatekeepers intentionally exclude women; I think they merely forget to be inclusive. Education about women’s challenges in the workplace needs to be taught not just to women, but men as well. 
As the panel wrapped up, the panelists were asked what advice they would give to individuals, seeking a career in the music industry: 
“Leadership starts with yourself. Be a sponge, don’t be offended by other people’s opinions.”
“Just be good”
And my personal favourite:
“Be yourself. Acknowledge the value in yourself.”
As a woman entering the music industry, I think it’s easy to start doubting your music and your worth. But it’s important to remind yourself of the good that has happened along the way, and the positive encouragement from other musicians. 
I’m hopeful about the future for women in the music industry. With persistence, I am positive that one day when we google “CEOs of record labels”, there will be pictures of women, and female artists will have as much of a chance of winning a grammy.....and I a DMA ;-) 
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etc-greys · 6 years
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Season 14 Episode 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story
Songs of The Episode:
Young Folks by The Wind And The Wave
Cosy in the Rocket by PSAPP
They by Congratulationz ft CavasBeta
Keep Breathing by Congratulationz
Such Great Heights by Madi Diaz & K.S. Rhoads
Portions for Foxes by Rilo Kiley
Synopsis:
*Warning this episode is extremely nostalgic and it is advised that you have your tissues ready*
The episode dives right into your feels as it opens with Mer on the beloved Seattle Ferryboat, yes that's right the boat that was once on Derek’s scrub cap -now housed by Mer- and the same boat that takes you to where the fantastical dream house was built. Accompanying her is Alex, as they descend back to the hospital. It is presumed that she went to see Derek and tell him about her prestigious Harper Avery nomination, when Alex asks, “How was it, was he happy for you?” To which she replied with a smile “No, he was jealous,” reminding us of their extremely competitive, yet ever motivating relationship.
Meanwhile Amelia walks in on Carina and Owen cooking naked… Amelia and Owen try to cover the awkward moment, but just ends in Amelia stealing some French toast while leaving hastily. Then we jump to Bailey as she’s walking to work with Ben driving alongside her trying to convince her to join him. She found out about the fire academy and to say she’s displeased would be an understatement. Arizona is painting every possible color on Sophia’s room, as she anxiously awaits her daughter’s arrival.
Another note of nostalgia as we see the new interns in the historic hallway (aka the tunnels) with the excess hospital beds. We are reminded of our favorite sleep deprived interns, the originals who grew up in those halls to be the doctors they are today. Mer is hesitant to leave for Boston where the Harper Avery Awards will take place. Alex tries to convince her, but is unsuccessful when a incoming trauma comes in. Deluca is still avoiding his ex, Sam.
The medical trauma this week: a rollercoaster ride gone awry! The first patient, who saved a bunch of children, is under the care of Owen and Amelia. Webber briefs Mer and Alex on the two patients who were transferred in the rollercoaster cart in which they crashed, for it would’ve been to life threatening to remove prior to their arrival at Grey Sloan. But wait, don’t they look familiar…. OMG they are the George and Cristina doppelgangers… but wait their friend just stepped out of the ambulance to check on them and… she is Izzie’s pregnant doppelganger. What.. what… and on que, the original theme song begins to play. Boy are we in for a treat.
Jackson tries to convince Mer to get moving, but she’s not leaving the trauma. Also it turns out the doppelgangers are doctors, they interning at Seattle Press! Bailey sends Ben to the Clinic as a punishment. Jackson checks in on Bailey to see where she is on the contest, but is quickly swerved when she confronts him about her husband’s career change and whether he happened to know about it when he had given her the money. Then we get a major throwback as we see Owen push Amelia back when he tells her that the hero doesn’t need a CT, but instead must be rushed to surgery. I’m sure this triggers you, just as well as me, back to that same decision that ultimately killed Derek. When we recall the tragedy of Derek’s death we reflect on a simple diagnosis that can be captured by quick CT and then fixed by an immediate surgery. Unfortunately, if this bleed is not seen right away, the patient will be gone, even if the rest of their body is healed by other surgeries. Alex is in shock at seeing Izzie, as Jo walks up for advice. He tells Jo that since she’s always wondered what she was like and surprised, Jo describes her as pretty and perky. Then Izzie comes up to them to check in on her friends, when he’s at a loss for words and Jo just watches him struggle in the most comical way. Izzie begins to lose her balance, and Alex swoops in to catch her. Another major tbt to when he carried Izzie after Denny’s heart wrenching death.
The intensity rises as baby George is unable to breathe when they remove part of the car seat. No worries, Webber has the fix, Mer must hold traction on his head. They are confused why everyone continues to stare at them and Mer fesses up, she tells them it's because they remind everyone of George and Cristina. To which baby Cristina freaks out and yells at them not to stare.
Little Izzie has an ultra sound done, and finds out that her baby has a tumor on it’s placenta. She must have surgery to get it removed, as it is very dangerous. Fearful, Izzie grabs Alex’s hand and Jo address the weirdness of the situation, but at the same time understands.  Mer is still holding traction and Jackson comes by to help. When baby Cristina realizes who the both of them are, her tune changes and she relates them to surgical royalty. Katherine and Jackson nearly convinced Mer to go to the awards, when after they transported baby George, baby Cristina’s stats started to plummet. She then tells Jackson to go in her place.
April makes her own attempt to convince Mer to go, but baby Cristina begs her not to. She claims Mer to be her idol and asks of her to think of her best friend (the real Cristina) and to save her like she would her best friend, to fight for her with the same vigor. Pulling at all of are heartstrings and nearly bringing Mer to tears. Jackson announces that Mer’s not going, so Maggie and Zola stay behind as the Avery’s depart. Amelia rushes to the OR with a portable CT when she finds out that Owen had ignored her order. He accuses her of being upset about his encounter with Carina, you know the one she walked in on. But she proves him wrong when the CT discovers a brain bleed (an expanding epidural hematoma to be exact) in which she must operate immediately. After gloating a bit to Owen, he then apologizes for doubting her. She explains that he was partially right, in that she was thinking of Derek and that in doing so he saved a man’s life today.
Webber and Bailey check in on baby George who blames himself for endangering his friends, when all he wanted was to have a little fun outside of working. His self- deprecating, selflessness, and innocence, triggers Bailey to recall the real George, a man who helped deliver her baby, who was really a part of her family, and whose death she mourned daily for over a year after the tragic incident occurred. Interestingly enough, when Webber goes to comfort her, he finds out that the tears are from her anger with Ben. Unfortunately their moment was interrupted by the sounds of banging in the skills lab (notice the accidental word play hahaha), to which Sam, followed by Deluca exited. Deluca consults his sister about his recent love affair with Sam, one that she’s seen the end result time and again.
April is angry with Mer for taking her Harper Avery nomination for granted, and inadvertently expresses her jealousy. She feels inferior, but Mer reminds her that she is not average, that she is incredible and ultimately she should give herself more credit. And she also expresses how deeply she does want the award. Arizona, Jo, and Alex must perform an emergency c-section on Izzie, because the baby is in distress. Arizona remembers Mark in comforting Izzie. She remembers his calmness, his charm, and his kindness. In this beautiful moment, she delivers the baby and also comforts herself as she prepares for her daughter's arrival, he reminds her of her strength, and instills confidence in her to be a fulltime mom again.
In one of my absolute favorite scenes of the episode, to which I cried a little if we’re being honest, Zola proves that she is wise beyond her years. She tells Maggie that she’s going be a brain surgeon like her father, before admitting that she missed her dad and then asked Maggie if she missed her mom. When Maggie answers with an almost tearful yea, Zola then recounts what she believes her mama would say: “Even though your mom’s not here, she’s always with you.” To end this beautiful moment she offers her aunty a hug.
Webber and Bailey save baby George, but not without wishing they had been able to do the same for the real George. Izzie’s baby is okay! Alex lets her hold baby Jasper for just a few minutes before he must take him to the NICU, but in this moment we see Arizona and Karev marvel in their past memories.
Bailey is scared of Ben’s commitment issues. But he explains that he just wants to try this while he is still young and able, he doesn’t want to live his life with regrets. Before they are able to finish their conversation, Webber grabs Bailey since Jackson is on the phone.
Another tear jerker. Jo tells Alex to call Izzie to get closure and see how she’s doing. Instead he tells her the story that she’s made up for her in his mind, one that is intricate, personal, and a bit of a nod at how Katherine Heigl is actually living, a tale in which she’s extremely happy. He tells her that he doesn’t need to call her because he doesn’t want to ruin it and he feels that “she’s as happy as I am with you.” Then they lean back in silence, just so happily in love and mature enough, grown enough, comfortable enough to acknowledge their past and embrace it, as it poses no threat to their future (that is his ex doesn’t, her ex poses a detrimental threat to their happiness, but I digress, let us be happy in this moment).
You know what, don’t even bother putting your tissues away. After Mer and April’s surgery, Bailey and Webber bring the Harper Avery awards to her as they project the show on the TV in the OR. All of the doctors along with Zola watch from the gallery as Catherine Avery announces that Meredith Grey has WON THE HARPER AVERY. Jackson gives the most heartwarming, eloquent, and masterful speech about Mer’s dedication to surgery, to her patients, and that despite her personal tragedies, she’s remained a gracefully innovative person/surgeon. He also pays tribute to her fallen sister, Lexie, who was one of my absolute favorite characters. As Mer along with all the doctors marvel in the moment, they pan the camera to the gallery where we see Mer looking up to a familiar face. Her mother applauds her with the proudest of smiles and we see the joy on Mer’s face in knowing that her mother is indeed looking down on her extraordinary daughter.  
Back at Arizona’s house, we see little Sophia as she arrives back home. She expresses how much she misses her mama and Arizona admits that she does too (a nod to Callie who is happy in NYC). As Arizona comforts her daughter with ice cream, there’s a close up of the first family photo of Mark, Arizona, Callie, and Sophia, the one that was taken so many seasons ago, paying homage to the fallen and the departed.
Things get steamy back at the hospital as Deluca and Sam hook up in the infamous on call room. Mer shows Owen baby Cristina, but he denies their similarities, to which she mentions Burke (saying that she should ask him if they look alike), thus another tribute to departed. He also reminds her that no one is like Cristina, true that Owen!
Mer and Alex kick the interns outta the tunnels as they celebrate together Mer’s epic and well deserved win. Cristina then facetimes in as they all enjoy champagne.  
A Few Additional Thoughts:
First of all, this episode was incredible and had a lot of nods to the epicness of Grey’s Anatomy’s 300 episodes! Kudos to the entire cast, crew, and writers on the incredible work they’ve done. This episode was truly special and definitely worth the watch. My praises are endless and thus I’ve decided to dedicate a whole other post to commemorate 300 episodes of Greys and the impact it’s had. So for more info, check out our next post!
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41 Weeks and a Year
Characters: Namjoon x reader Genre: Fluff, tiny bit of angst Word count: 3473 Rating: M for language and mentions of sex
4 weeks
Namjoon finds it hard to believe. There’s two little pink lines on a stupid $9.99 stick that you had peed on ten minutes ago that has now officially changed his life forever. You’re watching him hesitantly, biting you lip as his usually acute mind tries desperately to process what this all means.
“Baby?” Namjoon blurts out in a squeak. “Small mini-me?”
You find it hard not to roll your eyes at his reaction. “Yes, Joonie. That’s what happens when two adults have unprotected sex in the broom cupboard at your Album launch party.”
It all clicks into place for him quite suddenly and Namjoon feels an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. He drops to his knees in front of you and lays his cheek again your abdomen, “My god, I’m gonna be a dad!” His beaming smile strikes you right between the eyes. “I can’t wait to tell the boys!”
You push him away with a frown. “Not yet, Joonie. It’s too early. Let’s make sure first, hmm?”
Namjoon pauses mid-text and pouts.
6 weeks
You want to kick yourself. Your words are fucking prophetic. You knew you should’ve kept your fat, unlucky mouth shut but here you were, alone in the emergency department, praying desperately as you felt another sharp cramp radiate through your pelvis.
The triage nurse is walking towards your seat with a sympathetic smile. “Is there anyone I can call for you, miss __?”
Namjoon’s on tour in Japan and you don’t want to upset him. Knowing his temperament, he would agonise over coming home versus staying to lead the boys. You shake your head at the nurse. “No, my mother’s on her way here.”
She nods and leads you into a curtained off cubical. The doctor sees you an hour later and you can barely comprehend what he’s saying as your mother clutches at your hand. He does some blood tests and wheels in an ultrasound machine.
There, in that grainy black and white screen, you see it for the first time. It’s the size of the tip of your pinky finger according to the doctor but there is a definite heartbeat that races like a horses gallop when the Doppler is turned on. The rhythmic beating fills you ears and your heart and you take a recording for Namjoon.
12 weeks
Namjoon can’t hold back the tears.
He knows he’s embarrassing himself in front of the Obstetrician but he can’t help but immediately fall in love with the small, odd creature rolling around on the ultrasound screen in front of him. It’s got four limbs, a massive head and a beautiful heartbeat which Namjoon records on his phone.
He’s holding your hand a little too tight and soaking the sleeve of your blouse but you can’t complain, it was strangely beautiful to watch this usually strong man wear his emotions so glaringly on his sleeve.
“Do you want to know the sex of the baby?” The Obstetrician asks.
“Yes.” Namjoon replies immediately but looks guiltily at you. “If that’s ok with you, honey?”
You nod, not minding in the least if Namjoon has a burning curiosity to know.
“It’s a girl.”
You’re ecstatic and there’s an overwhelming sense of amazement but Namjoon clearly feels it more intensely. He’s sobbing now and doing so in an incredibly ugly fashion. Even the Obstetrician looks concerned.
“We’re going to have a baby girl.”
Namjoon makes the recording of her heartbeat his ringtone.
“Guess we should tell the boys,” you mutter to him as he wipes the ultrasound gel off your belly.
15 weeks
Jungkook is talking to your belly again. He tells your baby girl the most incredibly inane facts about dolphins and ginseng and Justin Bieber. This is arguably the longest conversation you’ve ever heard Jungkook have with anyone.
The boys are all just as equally obsessed with your pregnancy though Yoongi will never admit to it. Jin buys endless amounts of pink clothing and Tae can’t stop shopping for toys though you’re not entirely sure they’re all for the baby. Namjoon talks about his “baby girl” like she’s a miracle of humanity and that no baby has ever been born before.
You draw the line when he starts to speculate about how she’s likely to change the human race as we know it.
Jimin’s actions are the most touching. He’s admiring in the quietest kind of way and hovers in the most inconspicuous moments. He holds your elbow when you walk down stairs and picks the boys’ meals knowing exactly what you can and cannot eat at this time. His pockets are strangely always full ginger lozenges to soothe your morning sickness and a bottle of water is never far from hand. “I can’t wait to be a dad, too.” You overhear him say to Namjoon one day.
Namjoon is currently in the corner of his studio where the boys are all gathered. “Honey, listen to this.”
He’s written a new song and the backing beat is the recording of your daughter’s heartbeat.
“I’m gonna put this on our next album.”
20 weeks
“She’s so big!”
Namjoon’s voice is annoyingly crackly over the video call. The wi-fi in his Thailand hotel room can be a bit temperamental.
You roll you eyes and try to get a look at the ultrasound screen yourself. It’s hard balancing a phone at the right angle for Namjoon since he couldn’t be here but you can understand his need to be a part of this.
“I thought you said it was a girl!” He says suddenly outraged. This shocks you into dropping the phone, craning you neck to see what Namjoon had meant.
The Obstetrician laughs patiently. “That’s the umbilical cord, Mr. Kim. Your girl is still a girl.”
Namjoon’s laugh radiates from somewhere on the floor. “Right. I knew that.”
You hum with happiness. This is the magical halfway mark and though you can’t say for sure yet, you think you feel the small fluttering movements you can see on the screen. Your morning sickness has finally passed and though your ankles swell like balloons after a long day, you feel on top of the world and the pregnancy glow has really kicked it.
“I can’t wait to come home and see her, honey.” Namjoon is emotional again. You can hear it in his voice though he’s trying hard to suppress it. “I miss her already.”
You smile though he can’t see you. “You’re not going to cry at every ultrasound are you, Joonie?”
26 weeks
“That looks good, give me a sip.” Namjoon leans over, sniffing the bottle.
You smack his hand away. “You know you’re not allowed any of this. It’s my glucose tolerance test.”
He whines and pouts adorably. “The doctor won’t know if I have a single sip.”
“But I’ll know.” The pathology nurse laughs as she finishes up with the initial blood test, pressing a bandaid to the crook of your elbow. “There’s a soda machine in the corridor if you want something sweet.”
Namjoon smiles charmingly at her, dimples and all and the pathology nurse looks a little flustered when he walks away with a kiss on your head.
“You’re a lucky girl.” She says to you as she shakes the vial of your blood.
He’s back a moment later, coke can in hand. He shares his audiobook with you and coos when you complain that the sugary drink makes you nauseous. He cradles you like a child when the third blood test makes you extra sore and piggy backs you to the car when you feel a little dizzy at the end of it all.
“I wish I could take some of this for you.” He mutters in the car when he thinks you’ve dozed off on the way home.
31 weeks
You should’ve known better than to read some of the comments online but sometimes curiosity really did kill the cat. Namjoon’s on a cleaning spree of the BTS fancafé and twitter page but even he can’t catch all the malicious things that slip through.
You honestly didn’t think you had gained that much weight but there are several unflattering pictures of you which make cows look like dainty ballerinas by comparison. There’s derision and mocking among his fans and though those comments make you angry, it’s nothing that you hadn’t endured before.
It’s the comments suggesting Namjoon deserved better that really got to you. There’s retweets from a supermodel whom had declared herself an ardent fan and the side by side comparisons were beyond unflattering. There are pictures from the award ceremony he attended last week where he had kindly posed for some selfies with her and they honestly looked like a stunning power couple.
That’s how he found you, curled up in a ball in your bed, trying to hide the tear-swollen eyes in your pillow. He knows instantly what has happened and curls up in bed next to you, drawing you into the cradle of his arms muttering profanities beneath his breath.
“She looks really good with you.” You venture after fifteen minutes of sniffling. “I can’t say I’d blame you if you were attracted to her. I mean, I would be attracted to her too if I were a guy. Why come home to this beached whale when you can have…”
Namjoon hides a smile in your hair, “but you’re my beached whale, carrying my little whale baby…”
You snort and punch him in the ribs, the only space you can find in the tight confines of his arms. “You’re meant to call me a gazelle; you’re meant to tell me that I’m still gorgeous and thin…”
“You’re not a gazelle and you’re certainly not thin but honey, these curves…” his hands stroke over your prominent baby bump and stops to cup you bum, “these curves are something I would kill for.”
The next day you wake to find all the BTS social media accounts suspended. Namjoon refers to this as a time-out for his fans until they can behave like adults.
34 weeks
It’s too early.
Namjoon doesn’t need a medical degree to know this.
He looks at your frightened features in the car next to him and tries his best not to panic but it’s hard when he thinks his baby girl is about to be born too early. He’s a smart man, he’s read not just the basic baby books but also the medical stats about premature birth. He can’t imagine seeing his tiny child being helped to breath by large sterile ventilators and being hooked up to things which feed her when she can’t breastfeed.
He wants to be your calming presence but it’s hard to when his imagination runs riot. All he can do is hold your hand and pray that Yoongi’s aggressive driving skills come to the fore today. You’re crying with the pain of the contractions next to him and when a small whimper escapes your tightly clamped lips, Namjoon feels like he’s been stabbed in the gut. He can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now and can only helplessly drag you into his arms just as Yoongi pulls up to the hospital.
Namjoon’s out of the car in a flash and while Yoongi scrambles around looking for a wheelchair, Namjoon scoops you out of the car and into his arms. He knows the way to the maternity ward like the back of his hand, having secretly drilled himself ever since he heard about how Jimin’s younger brother had been born in the hospital foyer.
His panic must’ve clearly shown on his face as he carries you through the brightly painted double doors of the maternity ward because the two midwives at the desk direct him straight into the nearest birthing room. His hair is stroked and his tears wiped away by a senior looking midwife as a young and entirely too cheerful doctor begins the examination.
He’s speaking but Namjoon can barely hear him through your whimpers of pain. His legs twitch manically up and down and he can’t seem to stop it. He’s alternately numb and panicked until he can hear his baby girl’s heartbeat again and watch the numbers light up the screen of the monitor.
“You’re not dilated, Ms. ___,”says the young doctor with a reassuring smile while he pulled off his gloves, “but we’ll keep you in for a few days of monitoring, if that’s alright with you.”
Namjoon nods frantically.
“Would you like some pain relief?” Namjoon’s head is bobbing desperately.
The morphine makes you sleepy but comfortable and Namjoon is finally relieved enough to leave your room. Yoongi is waiting at the door.
“You look like a bus hit you, dragged you down the road for a few blocks and dumped you in a country ditch.”
Yoongi always did have a way with words but Namjoon acknowledges that he’s cried a lot this pregnancy. More than you have really, if he made the effort to count the occasions.
The rest of the boys arrive twenty minutes later. Hobi has brought enough take-out to feed a small army and the doctors and midwives duck in occasionally to steal a spring roll. You’re too exhausted to eat but you’re keen for Namjoon to re-fuel since he insists on staying with you for the night. They leave an hour later when Jungkook is finished lecturing your baby on how badly behaved she has been tonight.
Namjoon stays throughout your 3 day stay. He cries again when you have another ultrasound just to be safe and beams with absurd amounts of pride when the doctor declares her a very good size for 34 weeks. You want to smack him for that because you’re going to have to push that little monster out through you vagina in a few weeks.
37 weeks
You’re in the emergency department again and you’re sure you recognize the triage nurse. She beams and waves at you even as Namjoon whimpers in pain beside you.
He’s cradling his left arm and his right foot is propped up on Jin’s bouncing leg.
“Will you sit still!” He hisses at Seokjin who only grins and waves at the fans who recognise him from across the waiting room.
“I don’t know how you managed to do this to yourself when you were only putting together the crib. Seriously Joon, you should probably have a doctor check you over while you’re here. This level of clumsiness has got to be some sort of disorder. Maybe there’s medication to fix it.”
You can tell Namjoon doesn’t appreciate the comment but vetoes retorting in favour of whimpering. You reach across him to smack Seokjin but the man has brilliant reflexes after years of dodging Jungkook’s punches.
Namjoon cries when you accidentally bump his arm.
It’s fifty minutes later when he’s had all his x-rays. He’s only got a sprained right ankle but his left shoulder is clearly dislocated. They give him some great drugs to relax him before popping his shoulder back in and Namjoon is talkative and philosophical for the rest of the evening.
You get texts from Jimin throughout this episode. He and Yoongi have finished putting together the crib and you’re secretly glad Namjoon won’t have to do it himself later.
Jin videos the whole of Namjoon’s exposition on the loneliness of palm-trees on deserted islands and puts it on twitter.
It trends worldwide for three days.
41 weeks
Namjoon’s got a new habit these past few weeks.
Since you haven’t gone into labour yet, he’s convinced that he can talk his baby girl out. It’s clearly not working.
Every part of you hurts except for your uterus but you refrain from rolling your eyes as you rest your phone on your abdomen. Namjoon’s on the other end of the line, in his studio working on their comeback album. He wants to do as much as he can before the baby comes and he becomes completely preoccupied.
“Now sweetheart, I know it’s warm and comfortable inside but you really need to come out and meet daddy. We’ve got your room all set up for you for weeks now…”
Taehyung and Jungkook had finished painting it 3 weeks ago after Namjoon had concussed himself on a paint can.
Your wayward child clearly loves her father’s voice because she chooses that moment to give you a whopping kick in the ribs, sending the phone sliding to the floor. You’re reaching to retrieve it when you accidentally wet yourself a little. At least that’s what you think happens until you realise the fluid isn’t stopping and it has now completely soaked through your underwear, your pants, the couch and was now dripping onto the carpet.
“Joon.”
“Yes, honey?” Namjoon happily continues to hum on the other end of the line.
“I think my waters broke.”
There’s a beat of silence. Then another. “I see. Well. I…”
Jimin’s voice comes next. “I’ve got him, ___. Call your midwife, I’m coming to get you.”
The trip to hospital is a blur. By the time Namjoon and the boys reach you, you’re contracting, it’s hard to walk and you fucking hate the world, especially Namjoon. You tell him so several times during the car trip to hospital and you repeatedly tell Jungkook, who’s rubbing your back, what a good little foetus he turned out to be and that his mother would be proud.
It’s quite a scene when you turn up to hospital, seven famous idols in tow but you lose six of them immediately at the door to the maternity ward. Namjoon is beside himself, pacing the floor as you strip to your birthday suit (all clothing is currently your enemy) and suck on the nitrous like it’s a lifeline.
Your world narrows down to one word when the doctor examines you and tells you you’re barely dilated.
“Epidural!”
Namjoon nods frantically and takes to hovering behind the lovely anaesthetist who calmly hands Namjoon the nitrous and suggests he takes a few puffs. He’s completely giggly and spaced out when you get the needle stuck in your back but that’s ok because sweet relief comes shortly after.
The nitrous is confiscated when the midwife returns.
It’s another arduous eight hours. The midwives and the doctors change shift before it’s time to push.
It takes another hour and a half before your baby daughter’s cries ring through the room. Namjoon cries immediately with her. He keeps his hands on her the whole time you’re getting stitched up. When she sneezes, Joon is absurdly upset that he didn’t capture it on camera. When she does it again, he’s ready and a short fifteen second video immediately goes out to family and friends. You’re inundated with calls and messages congratulating you. Namjoon is too beside himself to answer.
He thinks she absurdly adorable and tells everyone who will listen. Yoongi says she looks like an alien shot out of a space cannon. Taehyung is head over heels in love with her instantly and Jungkook holds her like she’s a unstable explosive device. She cries hysterically when Hobi and Jimin pass her between them and moments later lands in Seokjin’s slightly perturbed arms.
She looks at his face and stops crying instantly. She keeps her eyes on his face until she dozes off in his arms. Seokjin absolutely loves it. It becomes his new favourite story to tell. He tells the janitor who comes to empty the bins when they visit again the next day.
1 year later
Namjoon is an obsessively proud father. The BTS twitter account is now inundated with pictures of your smiling daughter who has her father’s dimples. Their selfies together are the stuff of retweetable legend.
Namjoon is already begging for another baby. He wants ten. You said yes…you’ll have two more and he can then find himself another wife.
When she has her first fever and is up all night, grizzly and unsettled, Namjoon holds her and rocks her until she dozes off in fitful starts. She’s up barely an hour later and Namjoon is exhausted and delirious when you suggest calling in reinforcements. Jin arrives at 04:50am, takes her in his arms and coaxes her to sleep across one very wide shoulder. Namjoon snores for the next five hours.
When she takes her first steps, Namjoon commemorates it by writing her a song. She cries endlessly when she first hears it until Jin adds his vocals to the mix. She loves it instantly. Namjoon wants to find this frustrating but can’t deny his daughter anything her little heart desires. Seokjin is it, apparently.
Namjoon is coaxing some lunch into her when you excuse yourself to the bathroom. You pee on that familiar blue stick which started it all nearly two years ago and watch as that double pink line reappears.
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outputcongo2-blog · 5 years
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The Linc - ESPN dubs J.J. Arcega-Whiteside the Eagles’ best value pick
Let’s get to the Philadelphia Eagles links ...
Best 2019 NFL draft value picks for all 32 teams: Todd McShay’s favorites - ESPN In$ider JJ Arcega-Whiteside, WR, Stanford (Round 2, No. 57 overall): Arcega-Whiteside comes from a basketball family, which is fitting because I think of him as a power forward. You won’t see much better in terms of boxing out defensive backs, especially in the red zone. He’s a scoring machine, finding the end zone 14 times last season. The Stanford product has very good speed and will come down with 50-50 balls. Look for him to use savvy route running and physicality to find separation. Between Arcega-Whiteside, newly signed DeSean Jackson and Alshon Jeffery, Carson Wentz is going to have a lot of mouths to feed this season.I also like Andre Dillard, although he needs some development. Miles Sanders can be an eventual starter, but for now fits in nicely with the running-back committee.
The best picks from Day 2 of the 2019 NFL Draft - PFF Pick 57 – JJ Arcega-Whiteside, Philadelphia Eagles. Big Board Rank: 23rdArcega-Whiteside should take the Eagles’ red-zone offense to the next level. His body control and catch radius is a perfect pairing with Carson Wentz. The Stanford wideout led the nation in red zone receiving grade last year.
NFL Draft Results: Eagles welcome five rookies to Philadelphia - BGN The Philadelphia Eagles entered the 2019 NFL Draft with seven picks and left with only five new rookies (for the second year in a row). Here’s a complete recap of this year’s draft class.
Reviewing the Eagles 2019 NFL Draft - BGN Radio Brandon Lee Gowton and Michael Kist analyze the entirety of the Eagles 2019 NFL Draft with fresh takes on the players selected and the UDFAs brought in! Presented by SB Nation and Bleeding Green Nation.
Eagles Add a QB & DT - Iggles Blitz Thorson is not a great QB. He is not a special prospect. But he is a QB that the Eagles liked. They think he has the traits to develop into a good player in their system. Thorson is 6-4, 222. He is a pocket-passer, but also has good athleticism. That is also the description for Carson Wentz, Nick Foles and Nate Sudfeld. Notice the trend? Thorson has a solid arm. He only completed 58 percent of his passes. You want that number to be 65 percent in college. Thorson threw for 61 TDs, but also 45 INTs. He did run for 27 TDs. Thorson throws well on the move. He can throw from different platforms. Puts good touch on his throws. He doesn’t have the arm to really drive the ball. Also doesn’t put good zip on intermediate throws. “QB wins” can be highly flawed when used too strongly, but Thorson won three bowl games in four years at Northwestern. There is something to be said for that.
Eagles draft is complete, did they do enough this offseason to upgrade their defensive line? - Inquirer But what about the ones that got away, or the ones they weren’t willing to trade up for? It may have taken a second-rounder to nab Clemson defensive tackle Christian Wilkins or slightly more than they gave up for Dillard to swipe Mississippi State defensive tackle Jeffery Simmons before the Dolphins and Titans selected each at No. 13 and 19, respectively. But it may have been worth the gamble. Only time will tell. The Eagles shouldn’t draft for the coming season, but their defensive line, from this vantage point, doesn’t look much stronger than it did before the offseason. And they didn’t get younger. Roseman emphasized that player acquisition isn’t over. He may still have a defensive lineman up his sleeve. Perhaps, Ezekiel Ansah? But the roster, for the most part, is set. And the Eagles’ moves up front on defense were solid, if underwhelming. They re-signed defensive end Brandon Graham and just, on Thursday, defensive tackle Tim Jernigan. They acquired defensive tackle Malik Jackson and brought back defensive end Vinny Curry. And they said goodbye to defensive end Michael Bennett, defensive tackle Haloti Ngata, and (essentially) defensive end Chris Long.
Clayton Thorson out to win a spot in Eagles’ QB room - PE.com “I grew up watching Peyton Manning,” he said. “I think I take things from each quarterback I watch. You watch Aaron Rodgers get out of the pocket and move and he is pretty impressive. But I try to be myself and who that is is a guy who can sling it. With our offense at Northwestern, I was able to learn how to throw the ball with a lot of anticipation and tight windows, making plays on the run, moving the pocket a little bit. But we had a great offense at Northwestern in terms of preparing me for the NFL. So, I feel like I have taken a lot from many different quarterbacks.”
Clayton Thorson drafted by the Philadelphia Eagles in the 5th round - Inside NU At the beginning of last fall, some outlets had Thorson as a projected first-round pick and a potential top five quarterback in the draft class, but over the last few months, his projected draft position settled between the third and fifth rounds. There was talk as to who was most interested in Thorson, with Panthers offensive coordinator Norv Turner notably attending his Pro Day. All 32 NFL teams were in attendance, but only Carolina met with him after his drills. Some also had him going to the Patriots at the end of the third round. Thorson didn’t partake in running or jumping drills at the Combine as he was recovering from an ankle injury he suffered in the Holiday Bowl, but he did throw with the other quarterbacks. He was not perfect, missing a few intermediate throws, but impressed with his strong arm on deep balls.
Philadelphia Eagles Select Shareef Miller - Black Shoe Diaries He’s shown the ability to be solid against both the run and the pass and while he lacks the quick twitch ability to be an elite pass rusher, Miller could well be a solid rotational defensive lineman for year to come. Additionally, Miller is a Philadelphia native and will get to stay home to start his NFL career.
Thor’s Best Available UDFA - Rotoworld [BLG Note: Eagles have reportedly added a couple names on this list.]
Eagles’ Alshon Jeffery Hosts Scavenger Hunt Giving Fans Chance To Find 9 Autographed Kids’ Jerseys During NFL Draft Weekend - CBS Philly It’s NFL Draft weekend and while the festivities are being held in Nashville, Tennessee, one of the Eagles wide receivers is making it special for fans in Philadelphia. Alshon Jeffery started a three-day scavenger hunt on Thursday, giving fans the opportunity to find nine autographed Jeffery kids’ jerseys. On Thursday he tweeted telling fans he was going to post clues on Twitter each day to let them know where they could find the jerseys.
This Rutgers standout’s life story is compared to ‘The Blind Side,’ but it’s even more extraordinary - NJ.com To get the complete picture of Kevin Wilkins’ story -- the one his two moms compare to an Academy Awards-nominated film called ‘The Blind Side’ -- start with the tattoos. Wilkins has ink decorated all over his upper body, each telling a story of his unusual path to Rutgers. There’s one celebrating his Cherokee Indian roots ... one honoring St. Joseph High in Montvale ... one depicting New Jersey ... and one signaling his No. 99 jersey. There are deeply personal ones, too. His four brothers and two sisters are honored on his arms. He has one for his mom who only recently returned to his life, one for a biological dad he never knew, and one he got as a 16-year-old to honor the woman who raised him. [BLG Note: Eagles reportedly signed Wilkins as an UDFA.]
Caleb Wilson Drafted by the Arizona Cardinals with the Last Pick of the 2019 NFL Draft - Bruins Nation Mr. Irrelevant becomes the only Bruin picked in 2019. [BLG Note: Caleb is the son of former Eagles defensive line coach Chris Wilson.]
Our hottest takes from a long Day 3 of the 2019 NFL Draft - SB Nation Congratulations to Philadelphia, who found the first quarterback drafted with worse advanced stats than Daniel Jones.
...
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Source: https://www.bleedinggreennation.com/2019/4/28/18521229/eagles-news-espn-names-j-j-arcega-whiteside-philadelphia-best-value-nfl-draft-pick-stanford-receiver
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baileymarie1793 · 5 years
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A decade’s worth of sports passion
I am not an athlete, but I have a passion for sports.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not uncoordinated or unknowledgeable. I tried my hand at rec-league basketball as a young kid, but it was too aggressive for my taste. 
I played six years of softball, but I was a terrible hitter and an average fielder. Frankly, the team I was a part of was quite average too.
I was always a great runner and made the varsity cross country team as a freshman in high school. I ran enough to get my letter and then called it quits after multiple bouts of pulled hip flexors. 
However, I always enjoyed football and basketball as an avid spectator and later reporter.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a small, southern town - the kind of town that nearly closes up shop for Friday night lights each fall. I grew up thinking it was normal to see the home team’s newspaper clippings plastered in downtown business windows and fans and families flock to watch the homecoming parade and following bonfire.
I remember learning the names of local high school football and basketball stars long before learning the names of college or professional athletes. 
I remember my dad dragging me to as many home games as he could, even if that meant me coming armed with coloring books to keep me occupied in the metal and wooden bleachers. 
All of that later translated to an insatiable love of high school athletics. 
When I was 14 years old, I interned at my local newspaper. My beat: the life of a cross country runner.
By 15 years old, I was connected with a local TV station in their up-and-coming “hot shots” program. I was sent to the high school football sidelines armed with a small, Canon, point-and-shoot video camera; a monopod and my dad as my personal bodyguard. 
The program was intended to give local kids interested in TV the chance to shoot their own sports while also providing free game coverage for the station. Instead, it became a career-changing calling.
I became a staple on the sidelines ever since. 
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After football, I requested basketball. Following a season of that, I added lacrosse to the mix as my high school started up their first-ever program.
Between 2009 and 2012, I never missed a single football game - home or away. I traveled to back-to-back state championship appearances. I cried on my final game. The head coach awarded me an honorary varsity football letter and a plaque that hangs on my wall to this day.
I knew, heading into college, that I wanted to pursue sports reporting. I set my sights to be an on-air sports reporter, potentially on the sidelines for ESPN.
As a freshman, a journalism professor sought me out to become a part of the school’s up-and-coming sports newscast. I was no stranger to new programs and happily jumped on board. However, I quickly became forced into the background behind seniors who already knew the hands-on producing skills that first-year me did not.
Sure, I could shoot. I nabbed college soccer and tennis highlights which aired in the first sports newscasts. I met Woody Durham. I interviewed Hall of Fame coaches. However, the instruction I yearned in script-writing and Final Cut Pro was never passed on no matter how many questions I asked on Sunday afternoons locked in the journalism school basement. I felt continually out-of-touch and in the dark.
I stuck with it for a semester because I had always been taught to carry out my commitments. At the end of that time, our group was granted an in-person meeting with the then-president of ESPN, John Skipper.
I was the only female freshman, and one of only a half-dozen females in the entire sportscast team, but I didn’t give that much thought at the time.
I remember filing into the conference room with all the rest of the group as John Skipper sat at the head of the table. He circled around the room, asking each of us our name, favorite teams and one question for him. 
I was roughly half-way through the group, situated almost directly opposite of him. When it finally came to my turn, I asked him my one yearning question: “when will you have a female anchor lead Sports Center or eventually lead Super Bowl coverage?”
I will never forget his response: a laugh. “That’s not going to happen,” he said. He then added a shameless plug about the rise of ESPN-W.
I was completely deflated. I was mortified that I appeared like a fool, judging by his laugh. I was angry no one else in the room seemed appalled by the response. I was hurt that something I had wanted to see or even possibly achieved had been so whole-heartedly shut down.
The next day I chose to no longer pursue the sports track in the journalism school. I also vowed to never work for ESPN.
I took the rest of the year and summer off from sports and refocused my career path toward news. I still had a strong love for journalism (and still do), but sports would be moved to the backseat.
I kept up with my home teams from afar - even tuning in to the high school football radio broadcasts from time to time. I didn’t return to the sidelines, though, until I got a phone call from my old TV station.
They offered me a paid gig: help shoot Friday night football part-time. I hesitantly agreed.
My former mentor turned boss showed me the ropes on a professional-style camera. I learned Edius editing software, how to write up the shot sheets and input the scripts in ENPS. I was a rising junior in college doing exactly what college freshman me wanted to do, except I was doing it in a real station instead of a school-based studio.
I once again gave up my Friday nights. Sure, I missed my sorority’s cocktails, but I had returned to the sidelines. 
That first night back on the turf, I felt like I was home. I wasn’t even at my high school, but I was comfortable anyway. I bounced around one of the 63-area high schools the station covered. I made friends and encountered old acquaintances from other stations from my previous years. 
I was by far the youngest person, as well as the only girl, in the entire area shooting high school football for TV. My station was lucky enough to have a female sports anchor who I was privileged to work with often, though she didn’t usually shoot her own highlights.
Despite being the obvious woman in a man’s field, my colleagues and co-workers never doubted my knowledge or ability. I had some strange looks and sideways glances, sure. I had some high-school-boy catcalls more times that I’d like to count. But once kickoff happened, nothing else mattered.
The station kept me on for basketball season and renewed me the following year for both seasons. 
As my confidence grew, I began to reconsider the idea of sports reporting. In February of my senior year, I took a leap of faith and attended an ESPN-sponsored sports reporting workshop in Nashville, Tennessee.
Ironically compared to my last ESPN close-encounter, the workshop was filled with aspiring female sports talent. (You can read more about my big takeaways in my previous post here.)
It renewed my faith a bit in my former dream, but it still left me with some harsh realities. So, I moved forward with news journalism as my focus, but I kept sports close at hand. 
Out of college, I returned to my former station as a full-time videographer. I covered a little bit of everything: breaking news, college athletics, election coverage, and so on.
For multiple reasons, I was burnt out after a year. The passion I’d had during “Friday Football Fever” seasons didn’t translate to the day-to-day job. I found myself having more bad days than good, more and more often. I can vividly recount days on the job I called home in tears. College doesn’t prepare you for that.
I took another job, another shift in my fluxing career: a multimedia journalist for my hometown newspaper. I returned to the same place that 14-year-old me wrote her first sports beat.
I was hired in late May and began in mid-June, just outside local sports seasons. After a couple months of writing under my belt, I requested to cover the upcoming football season - the same team I grew up watching as a child, the same team I immersed myself into the sidelines with during high school. My boss agreed, seeing his Friday nights suddenly freed up after many more years of coverage than I had seen.
I also requested to video the season. He said it was fine as long as the articles got written. I grabbed my personal camera gear - and my dad, for old time’s sake - and returned to the first sidelines I had ever known.
The video work came easy. I doubled down and began to live-tweet the games as the action took place too. I soon gained a local following.
The articles took a tad more work at the start. I felt like a complete poser at first... Although I could speak and shoot a game recap with ease, I felt like I sounded out of place once pen went to paper. Why would anyone want to read a 20-something female’s play-by-play when a man who’s written sports for longer than I existed had probably already done it better, gotten it posted, and didn’t think twice about it before breakfast?
I got in the habit of speaking my recap before writing it. I used my tweets to string together the action. As I became more confident, I added game stats to my articles (though I still felt like a poser when I did so). 
Eventually, the words came easier. I stopped writing them from speech and wrote them like normal. 
Toward the end of the season, I remember walking into the office one day to hear an older citizen reading my football piece aloud in the lobby. I ducked my head and made a bee-line for my office. “Who wrote this article,” the man demanded.
“Our staff writer, Bailey Pennington,” our office manager politely replied.
I froze.
The older man curtly said, “tell him he did a good job. The boys sound like they’re on the right track.” He folded the paper under his arm and left.
My face flushed. I wasn’t angry I had been mistaken for a male writer. Rather, I had proven I was just as good. I belonged at the table that John Skipper had laughed me away from, and not just because I could shoot video.
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In the year and a half since that moment, I have unashamedly and relentlessly covered the newspaper’s sports. I became a staple, video or still camera in hand, on the basketball court, behind the softball dugout, on the lacrosse sidelines, beside the swimming lanes and at the cross country finish lines.
I easily spend 20 hours a week at high school games on top of my regular work week, now ten years removed from the first time I filmed a game. Win or lose, I wait outside locker rooms for coach interviews (they all know me by name, most have my cell number too). My highlight videos are viewed and shared hundreds, sometimes thousands, of times on social media. People in the community stop me and thank me for my coverage more times than I can remember.
For all of these things, I have become extremely grateful. I realized my former dream of an ESPN gig wasn’t my path... Instead, I learned my value on a high school sideline by the impact it’s had on the dozens of athletes and fans in my small hometown. I came full circle.
Now, I’m two weeks away from another shift in my journalistic career... and I can’t help but reflect on my decade’s worth of sports passion.
At 25 years old, I’ve covered more sports in photos, video and articles than many budding sports-hopefuls could dream of by this age.
I’ve covered stages as big as the Carolina-Duke basketball rivalry to arenas as small as a 9:00 AM post-holiday high school basketball game (no joke, there might have been two dozen people in attendance). 
Now, my career is taking me away from home and away from sports. I’ll be traveling, producing magazine and web content and helping oversee a team of creatives marketing for a big-name brand. 
I’m thrilled for the opportunity. I'm excited for the challenge. I’m eager for the journey. But it’s bittersweet... with the majority of tears being shed for those same sidelines.
Sports is my passion. 
I’m not an athlete. I’m not a coach. I’m not a man starting a Twitter feud or Facebook comment war, arming my arguments with stats and name-drops to prove “my sports knowledge is bigger than yours.” But I will happily argue with all of them that my passion is greater.
Even as I’ve written this long-form post/rant, I’ve shed a few tears. 
I’ve notified many of the coaches I’ve covered over the years personally. All of them have been overjoyed for my new opportunities, although they’ve been sad to see me go. Most have expressed no surprise that I’m moving to bigger things, which I take as the highest compliment. 
I haven’t had the heart to post it publicly until now... Most of my “followers” are expecting a basketball highlight video posted to Twitter by this time. But tonight I needed to reflect.
Although I’m moving away from sports once more, I know the sidelines will always be there. I’ve proved all I needed to prove to myself. I know my ability and so do the ones that matter most. 
And I’m sure, with any luck, I’ll be back there once more with a camera in-hand.
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jackywroteabook · 4 years
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5 Minute Fiction: “SUPERMAN”
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{Just a little taste of the writing you can expect in one of my full-length novels, without the sheer number of hours, willpower, & commitment it takes to finish it. All short stories are representative of my writing voice, content, characters, settings, moods, & themes of my general fiction. Enjoy a quick snapshot of the kind of writing a genuine, award-winning Jacquelyn Eubanks Novel™ has to offer. All short stories take approximately 5 minutes or less to read. Like what you read? Buy my books on Amazon (The Last Summer & The Last Time) and follow me on social media (@JackyWroteABook).}
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I remember him in flashbacks. It’s the little things that trigger memories. Last weekend, I was cleaning out his basement and came across a box full of cassette tapes from the nineties. I pulled out each rectangular tape and examined the labels running along the side, noting the bands and album names written in his blocky handwriting, now faded or smudged. One particular tape caught my eye: Crash Test Dummies’ “The Ghosts That Haunt Me”.
           His favorite.
           Tearing through the boxes almost in a mania, I finally uncovered his old stereo system, the one with three CD slots, huge speakers, and two cassette tape places. I plugged it into an outlet and blew the dust off the tape slot, placed the cassette in, clicked the door shut, and pressed ‘play’.
           A sob caught in my throat as the baritone’s voice wafted through the room, crooning to the piano ballad about Superman.
           I close my eyes and am plunged into a memory of sitting in Daddy’s lap, listening to this song while he sings along, my curly red hair tucked under his chin. I can feel his throat vibrate with the notes and his whiskers scratch like sandpaper against my cheek. He smells of cigar smoke and some kind of cologne that I never learned the name of, but he always wore it. I’m no older than three.
           The hot, silent tears slide down my cheeks like that moment when you reach the top of the rollercoaster and the only place you can go is down, down, faster and faster, at such a steep incline that your stomach drops and you feel like you’re falling and suddenly you can’t contain it anymore, and you just scream.
           My father was a man who didn’t say much, but he didn’t need to. His actions spoke volumes.
           We were never rich, but my dad made enough to provide a good life for his family. I remember one Christmas, my family was ready to go on our first real vacation – as in, no tents, sleeping bags, or dehydrated backpacking food. We were going to a ski resort in Montreal, and my sisters and I were so excited to finally see real snow after living in southern Arizona our whole lives. I packed my suitcase full of the essentials days before we had to leave – my stuffed animals, a nightgown with Barbie on it, my blankie, and some Froot Loops – and I was so excited that I could hardly sleep. Two nights before Christmas, Dad called everyone into the living room for a family meeting. He explained that we weren’t going on the trip anymore. He looked somberly down at me and my two little sisters, reached for our mother’s hand, and drew in a breath. He then explained that there are a lot of people less fortunate than us. As simply as possible, he told us that the Bank was going to take away another family’s house if they didn’t pay money.
           “How much money, daddy?”
           “A lot.”
           He explained that rather than go on a trip this Christmas, we were giving the money we would’ve spent on vacation to the Bank so the family, who had little girls just like me, could keep their house.
           He never told us who the family was.
           I never learned how much money he gave them…but, as an adult with a job and children of my own, I can take an educated guess.
           Dad spent decades working for the same company, and he hated it. He told me he’d dreamt of being a jet fighter pilot, but his eyesight was so horrendous that it was impossible. So he settled for a job he didn’t enjoy, and it drained him. Hours upon hours, he labored in a DuPont plant mixing chemicals to create car paint. He couldn’t stand the wrath of his superiors on the corporate end, and he never could get close to his coworkers. He was a natural introvert, yes, but he didn’t associate himself with people who degraded his integrity. The men at his job smoked pot during lunch breaks, blew all their Friday paychecks on hard liquor, and frequently invited him into a prostitute trailer parked behind the factory. He didn’t agree with that lifestyle and was persecuted for it mercilessly. Often, the only companionship he found at work was from the radio, which he listened to while eating lunch in the car.  
           There are things I distinctly inherited from Dad. His passion for politics is a perfect example. I remember nights spent in front of the TV, Tom Brokaw broadcasting the news, my dad and I sharing pita bread and hummus or crackers with canned sardines or smoked oysters. The salty, oily taste of fish in a tin acts as a trigger. During those quiet times spent together, he liked to pass on thoughts and wisdom.
           The only person he ever hated was Bill Clinton. He despised that man, and whenever the president appeared on our screen, Dad would shut the television off in a huff. When I asked him why President Clinton bothered him so much, he just shook his head and uttered, “I can’t respect a man who cheats on his wife. How do you trust someone who lies to the very person they promised to always be faithful to?”
           I never questioned the morality of my dad. He was a righteous man who read the Bible, attended church, and believed that beer is a sign that God loves us and wants us to be happy.  
           He had that exact phrase – it’s a Ben Franklin quote – on a T-shirt. His best friend, Robert, had a shirt to match it. They were closer than brothers, and I remember Uncle Bob was always at our house bearing gifts and pearls of wisdom for us girls. He and Dad joked that the hope of America rested on my shoulders, and that it was my duty to keep my reputation as spotless as possible so I could be president one day. I never forgot their faith in me, long after Uncle Bob waded into the deep end of atheism and then went under, completely submerged and drowning in the bitterness of his refusal to acknowledge a god. We never saw him again, and even though Dad said nothing, I know losing his best friend like that was worse than if he had died.
           Dad’s father died when he was fourteen, and from that moment on he took on the roll of Superman for his mother and brother during their grieving. He loved his father more than words can express, and I knew it; spread throughout my childhood were bits and pieces of Papa, appearing in the forms of a watch Dad always wore, a Free Masons ring, a case full of World War II medals, and a brown leather recliner that he and I always sat in. Dad always loved World War II movies. I never said it aloud, but I always figured those movies helped him feel connected to his father.
           In high school, I was bullied and sexually harassed by a gang of undersexed pubescent boys. Every day I would make up outlandish excuses to stay home, or halfway through the day fake sick and get sent home early. Finally, Dad caught on to what was happening, so he went directly to the principal so the harassment would stop. To our dismay, my sexist principal simply had a chat with each of the boys that consisted of approximately two sentences: “She’s obviously mentally unstable. Just leave her alone and the school won’t have to deal with her problems anymore.” Needless to say, this didn’t help the situation; if anything, it was reassurance to the boys that our principal was on their side, and they could continue torturing me without fear of punishment. That’s when Dad decided to take things into his own hands: he signed me up for taekwondo and taught me everything I needed to know about dealing with assholes. By the time I’d reached a black belt and gotten in two fights at school (both in self-defense, of course), I may not have been well-liked, but at least I was left alone. Dad taught me that I didn’t have to be afraid because all the strength, courage, and confidence I’d ever need was already within me.      
           When I was twelve, I decided that baseball was my favorite sport and I promptly became obsessed with it. In fact, rarely a day went by that I wasn’t glued to the TV, engulfed in a Dodger’s game. I came to know every player, every team, every score, stat, and skill in Major League Baseball. And before I knew it, Dad was joining me. He never, to my recollection, was a baseball fan. But something changed, and all of a sudden he was the one keeping track of scores and standings and waiting for me to join him in watching the game. On my birthday every year, we drove all the way to Los Angeles to watch a Dodger’s game. Just me and him. It was wonderful. On the way home from one of those birthday games, I was falling asleep in the shotgun seat when I heard him whisper, “Thanks, Mack-ster, for reminding me of how much I love baseball.”
           I later learned that baseball was his dad’s favorite sport, and the two of them bonded over listening to Dodgers games on the radio when he was a child. After his father died, his love of baseball died, too.  I promised myself that I wouldn’t let the same thing happen to me when my dad died. If  he ever died.
To me, Dad was more invincible than Superman. He never showed weakness, but he had a quiet empathy that bred an old-world, gentlemanly air about him. He seemed timeless, and even as the years passed he was consistent in character and looks. That’s why our last Daddy-Daughter Night left me numb and disbelieving, as if reality could not be as frigid as the touch of his words.
It was a Tuesday night. He called me up and suggested we go out to Luigi’s, our favorite Italian restaurant. I met him at our usual booth, situated under a wooden overhang covered in fake grapes hanging from vines. It smelled like tomato sauce, basil and garlic. A basket full of breadsticks sat in front of him on the red-and-white-checkered tablecloth, a dish of olive oil and parmesan cheese next to it. We carried on our usual conversation through the appetizer – calamari – and the salad course – with bleu cheese dressing, like always – when the air thickened with words not yet uttered, suppressed and even withheld. I could sense this cloud suffocating and separating us. There was something he wasn’t telling me, I knew, but I couldn’t reach him through the smog of sensitive silence. Finally, when the waiter delivered our entrees (eggplant parmesan for me, veal parmesan for him), he spoke.
“I’m dying.”
His words made the cloud evaporate so quickly that it created a vacuum, a black hole sucking out every emotion, every word, every thought, every sense until I was left with only shock. The breath caught in my throat, and I could feel my chest tighten with the realization that Superman had a kryptonite: Cancer.
I broke down sobbing within a matter of seconds, the tears flooding my eyes and pouring down my face as if a dam burst, throwing away all lessons he’d given me on “mental toughness”. And, to my absolute horror, he started crying, too.
It was the first – and the last – time I ever saw my father cry.
He died that spring.
And the man who shaped me into the person I am, the legacy he left behind, the impact he made on other lives – they are still a part of me, a part of the world, even though he’s no longer physically here. I feel his presence in objects, in sounds, in scents that trigger memories and bring him back to me intangibly. He did everything he could to leave this world better than he found it. He was the greatest man I ever knew.
The last notes of the song echoed in the basement, spreading a warm, bittersweet wave of nostalgia through my body reverberating in my soul as I hung on to the last line of lyrics:
And sometimes I despair the world will never see another man like him…
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celticnoise · 5 years
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Our football club is a family, a special family. And a family is more than just the sum of its parts. It is a history. It has a background, an origin story, it has its own mythology.
Those who have lost people remember them in stories and anecdotes.
We hear tales of those who came before us, who we were never able to meet, and thus learn about where we come from.
Today this family is in mourning, but it is a mourning tempered with remembrance and something like awe. That’s an appropriate emotion when a true great has left the world and all around are contemplating his achievements and his impact, and the legacy he leaves behind.
Like any family, a football club evolves in generational steps. To the current generation of Celtic fans, some of those who came before are nothing more than names in a history book. Perhaps there is grainy video footage of some of them if we’re lucky.
Whilst we understand their contribution to our club as it evolved itself, it is often difficult to connect their achievements with the ones that we are enjoying today.
But the unbroken line is the proof of their greatness; nothing we take for granted would have been possible without them.
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Yet there are others for whom that need never be said. Their contribution, their impact, their accomplishments, are so awesome that recounting them, in whatever detail, gives them form that in no way does justice to the sum total of their worth. You can look at their career stats and their medal haul and still never get it.
That is not immortality. There is something beyond trophies and titles, something that elevates a man to the pantheon of icons, which cannot be measured by statistics. Billy McNeill has been the walking embodiment of Celtic for more than 30 years.
Modern Celtic would not exist without him. It does not matter if you’re in your 60’s as my father is, in your 40’s as I am or in your 20’s where you have no memory of either the player or the manager. Even the saying of his name requires that you use a tone of respect. To think of him at all is to think of this club; the two cannot easily be separated.
My father could wax lyrical about what a footballer McNeill was. He often has. He remembers all of it, yet his appreciation of who Billy was and what he represents is no greater than mine nor that of the 20 year old for whom that footage is all there is.
I’ve watched his great games and the great moments within those games. I have gazed for what must be hours at the incredible, historical, photo of him standing in Lisbon with that trophy raised above his head, that glorious moment for which there is no equal. And I remember McNeill as the manager who led us to a centenary double in 1988.
My father has one appreciation of the man, and I have another. He saw the whole story unfold whilst I saw only half of it. Yet both of us felt the same sense of something special gone from the world this morning when we heard the news.
And our appreciation of his passing belongs too to those 20 somethings who never saw the player or raised a triumphant cheer for the manager. Their knowledge of the big man is limited to those moving pictures and their still equivalents, and the acres of commentary on his life and on his career. McNeill played no part in their warm memories of the club.
And yet he was everything to them, as he was everything to us.
They get it just as we do.
They feel the same way we do.
They know that a titan has gone, but also that in the ways that ring down through the ages he never really will be because they look at the club we have today and they can connect it to Billy McNeill without the least difficulty in comprehension.
That is special. That is the greatest tribute to the man there is.
I spend much of my time in Fife – I’m there as I write this – and everywhere out here you are reminded of the impact and the legacy of Andrew Carnegie; his spirit infuses this place in a way that is inescapable. He died in 1919 – this is his centennial year – but his heritage is such that he’ll never be forgotten or his enormous contribution be allowed to fade. His statue is the centrepiece of Pittencrieff Park in Dunfermline, what locals call The Glen.
Billy McNeill’s statue sits outside Celtic Park, holding aloft the European Cup. The Lisbon Lions stand is named for the team he captained. The other statues, of Stein and Johnstone, formed part of that legendary era. Jock was the father figure, McNeill the firstborn son and heir. After Jock went it was Billy who most embodied the club and everything about it. He is as much a part of the place today as Carnegie is part of Dunfermline, where he was born and to whom he bequeathed so much.
What did Billy McNeill give to us?
Everything, friends. He gave everything to us.
My father’s generation called him Cesar; it was not an invocation of greatness then, although I’m sure every one of them meant it that way.
But he got his nickname from Cesar Romero, the actor.
The genesis of it is rather amusing; “In the original Ocean’s 11, the actor Cesar Romero drove the getaway car,” said Professor Richard Cogdell, when awarding Billy his honorary degree from Glasgow University. “Billy McNeill was one of the few members of the Celtic team (who) had a car.”
The generations to come will remember him as Caesar, the connotation different, the appellation more than earned. Because to us he was greatness personified, his life the stuff of legend and history. He was a leader. He was a conqueror. He was the master of all he surveyed.
But he had such humanity about him too. Those lucky enough to have been in his company were ever thrilled by his sheer presence, his charisma, but also his decency, kindness and love for all things Celtic.
All the Roman emperors were granted the title as a right, but in the beginning there was just one; Gaius Julius Caesar. His name, like that of McNeill, rings down through history, yet great though his achievements were it was his nephew, the first of the emperors, Gaius Octavian, made Caesar’s son by will, who best lived up to the name.
He not only avenged the murder of his great uncle, but won the civil war that followed, overtook his partners in the Second Triumvirate, rose to become First Citizen and created the imperial system and the Pax Romana – the Roman peace.
But like a list of Big Billy’s honours, a mere recitation of his achievements in no way does justice to the sum total of them and the way they changed the world.
Octavian, who by then was called Augustus, knew it himself. Lying on his death-bed, surrounded by his people, his final words were said to have been; “Have I played the part well? Then applaud as I exit. Behold, I found Rome of clay and leave her to you of marble.”
And that’s what Billy McNeill was and that’s what he did.
Look at the magnificent legacy he leaves behind him.
Look at what his life – all of it revolving around our club – did for the lives of every single one of us. He charted and changed the course of our history even as he made his own.
The man may have gone, but his immortality is assured.
Hail to the only one King Billy.
Now, and forever, hail to Caesar.
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