#haha what do you mean i was supposed to post this a (checks calendar) long time ago

[azareel-writes]

spoiled (and deserving)

♡ omega dabi/gn!alpha reader (established relationship) ♡ sfw! domestic life + pre-heat nesting

everything clicks together when dabi sinks into a cloud of your pillows and clothes. barely ten seconds pass before he realizes what's going on. he's nesting. he's in pre-heat.

it shouldn't be a surprise given the positive turn his life has taken. he's fed well, sleeping through the night instead on hair trigger vigilance, and most importantly, you. now his body's functions are catching up with him.

the fuzzy dreamlike state he was in faded away. dabi blinks a few times at the unfamiliar angle he's laying at and — god damn it, he's rearranged the entire bedroom.

he climbs out of the nest to assess the damage to the whole room. spare sheets folded over the windows to darken the den; the full size bed was now shoved into the corner where your dresser was supposed to be, the walls making a nice semi-enclosed space. he can definitely get this done before you come back from work. …right?

the thought of tearing down his nest stirs up something in his stomach. part of him knows you wouldn't mind him indulging in his secondary gender. but what if you don't? what if you don't want him?

"babe?" your voice comes from the other side of the bedroom door, followed by three gentle knocks. "you okay in there? i smelled something burning."

the omega's hands reflexively cup the sides of his neck. his scent glands are damaged from his burns. it takes a lot for him to produce a scent and it had to be the worst kind.

dabi clears his throat before answering in a steady voice. "everything's fine!"

you're quiet for a pause. "i've been sitting in the kitchen listening to you shuffle around for about fifteen minutes." they've been home that long?!

the doorknob turns.

he moves to intercept you but you're just a bit faster. the door opens and you stick your head in.

"um... where's the be— oh." you peek around dabi and the door. he wants to crawl into the nest and disappear.

you reach up and cup his face in your hands. like the lovesick fool he is, he leans into you. your lips curve into a smile. "so this is what you were doing?" you give him a gentle peck on the lips. "let's get you to the nest, yeah? you look you need it."

he nods and lets you guide him back to the nest. his body sinks into the blankets. safe, happy, good.

you slip the cardigan off your shoulders — your favorite, the one you wear all the time —and drape it over him.

"can i lay down in your nest?" you ask. his face heats up.

"it's yours too." he mumbles.

you slide in and gather his lanky body in your arms. the nest is a perfect fit for the both of you. you drag your hand through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp. dabi melts with each stroke, pulling him further into sleep, saturated in the smell of dark chocolate, in the scent of alpha-mate and home.

on the precipice of sleep, he hears you whisper,

"i hope you know you're gonna get absolutely spoiled rotten." your chest moves with a soft giggle. "so be prepared, okay? you deserve it, dabi."

#<> omegaverse #sub!bnha #bnha x reader #sub!dabi #omega!dabi #dom!reader #alpha!reader #gn!reader #soft dabi #dabi fluff #<3 domestic #haha what do you mean i was supposed to post this a (checks calendar) long time ago

[koterkot]

explain the entirety of pluto lore in one comprehensive tumblr post. GO!!!!!!

ok so first of all fuck you Second of all- Pluto is a gieeg oc of mine, here's a old reference sheet i made for them in ms paint because that is somehow my main art program:

(tw: comedical usage of the f slur. i'm sorry gay people.)

[* Due to the gieeg mothership that Pluto has lived in for most of his life having like, weird time dilating shit, a gieeg year is roughly 5 human years. (HIS ASS IS 80 YEARS OLD DURING MOTHER 1!!!! HI GRANDPA!!!!!) ? I just picked random numbers and that's now his birthday in the gieeg calendar that has like 50 days and 50 months lma-]

SSOOO COUGH COUGH IGNORE THE SHITTY ART I SWEAR THAT I HAVE IMPROVED ANYWHOS- Pluto's story is simple, he was born in the mothership with two disorders, being them SPD (Selfharming Psionic Disorder) and OPD (Overwhelming Psionic Disorder) together with the bonus addition of The Tism. Raised in the Mothership of their species, their mother Eris is one of Giegue's strongest troops, and is mostly absent from Pluto's life as she is too busy beating the shit out of alien scum on other planets that Giegue plans to conquer.

[credits to thealmightyven for cooking this shit up, this was her first drawing and ofc the first thing she does is ask pluto if he's a queer] COUGH COUGH WHEEZE AAND THEN THERE'S CERES!!! HIS DAD!!!

(AALSO OLD ART AND STUPID SKETCH BLEUGH) he works for marketing giegue as like this super cool warlord when in reality he's just a traumatized teenager that got weaponized because he's really fucking strong and stuff OH!! OHH!!! SPEAKING OF GIEGUE!!! wait no nevermind we need to touch on pluto's childhood first uhhh uhhh Pluto basically got bullied a LOT as a kid. Last one to get picked for everything, always made fun of due to their lack of tail and inability to use PSI without physically and mentally straining themselves. Sooo... What did Pluto do??? Shut himself away from the outside world, watch their dad's massive collection of holotapes full of movies and tv shows and cartoons and shit

[ANOTHER OLD ASS DOODLE RRAGGGH!!!!] AND LIKE!! THEY LIVED BY THEMSELVES AND THEIR DAD FOR A VERY LONG TIME!!! Until... BBOOM!!! A good while after Pluto's 16th birthday, and 2 days after their last check up on their psionitrist, (doctor specialized in psionics and shit) THE FEDS PULL UP AT CERES' DOOR!!! AND THEY CALL FOR!!! PLUTO!!!

ok so cutting a long story short pluto has like a FUCK ton of psi, and like, the same level as giegue's, soo he basically is supposed to get drafted into their army but unfortunately he has SPD in which has no distinct treatment, sooo their best solution to fix up pluto was to SEND HIM TO THE BIG BOSS!!! GIGAGAS!!!

resuming a entire fanfic's worth of gay tension they eventually come to one conclusion

AAND NOW PLUTO HAS HIS FIRST FRIEND!! EVER!!! using the insane confidence boost of being the Commander of All Gieegkind's best friend (secretly boyfriend), Pluto goes from "loser dork town mayor" to "COOLEST GUY IN TOWN!!! YEAH!!!"

this helps pluto form a few friendships, and by a few i mean like 6 people (probably more than you have anon. HAHA!!) this relationship with giegue though, lasts for only 2 years before it is permanently ruined by giegue's first invasion onto earth. and his loss. i'll touch more on that later on my SECOND POST!!! (YES!!! THERE WILL BE PLURAL POSTS!!) that'll cover what happens to pluto after the events of mother 1 and during mother 2 and stuff BUH BYE!!

#mother 1 #oc #earthbound #earthbound beginnings #digital art #ms paint #doodles #gieeg #gieeg oc #pluto the not dwarf planet #please gas this shit up i cooked way too much cough cough wheeze #giegue #my ocs #oc artwork #oc art #original art #I FUCKING LOVE EARTHBOUND!!!!! #cypress if you're reading this i'm going to kill you #slash j

[alpacaparkaseok]

Check in with B - Survey Answers

Thank for to those of you that took my survey! It really helps me to know what I need to improve here on my blog and gives me the awesome opportunity to check in with you individually and see how you’re doing! 

First, to those of you who expressed feelings of depression, anxiety, or even darker thoughts, please please utilize my dm’s as well as kokobot. You can search it up in Tumblr and use the chat feature, where you can express your feelings and receive love and encouragement from other Tumblr users! There are also mini-courses on how to better deal with anxiety and other personal issues. 

I’m here for you (LITERALLY, THAT’S WHY I’M ON THIS SITE YOU GUYS) and am always ready to listen and love you. 

Now! For answering some of your questions regarding myself, my Tumblr schedule, and other things! I’ll put a “read more” right here so this doesn’t take up your whole dash, but here are your answers! 

Happy reading!

What happened to Friday Followers?

For those of you that don’t know, I used to do a thing every Friday where I would select 10 random followers and pose a question for them to answer. I stopped doing it because people didn’t really interact with it anymore...but I want to do something like that again! 

Do you know when you’ll be updating the Taehyung series you have on hiatus?

More or less! I’m reworking it at the moment to become one long post, rather than a series. That just wasn’t working out for me. As of right now, I have a couple of things I need to post first, but hopefully it will be up within the next couple of weeks! Thanks for remembering it and checking in!

What was your favorite story you’ve written, and what was the hardest thing about writing it?

This is such a hard question! Looking through my masterlist, I can remember which ones were really hard and which were easy for me. (i.e. “Mine” came to me so easily, whereas “Where You Should Be” did not!!) I think if we’re being honest, “7 Secrets” has to be the one because it’s what got me started on this site. The hardest thing was letting go at the end, honestly. It’s always so hard to let go, especially when those characters feel like home. (that’s why there’s so many drabbles for it lol)

A fan favorite (and personal favorite, of course) is The Pact! I genuinely enjoyed that series so much because I was basically just projecting what I wanted into the series. The hardest thing though was writing the last chapter. I was doing finals that week at uni, and so my brain had officially stopped working. But hey, we made it!

Ok, I’m grouping these ones together:

How do you write and plan out your longer fics?? And how long does writing and editing take? They're so clean and immersive.

Can i ask how you organize your writing/posting schedule? I feel like your so organized with it and have like a bazillion notes.

I was wondering how you always find the motivation to write such amazing stories and how your writing process goes. Where do you find ideas to keep your story going.

I HAVE A QUESTION?! HOW THE HECKETY HECK ARE YOU SUCH AN AMAZING WRITER AND HOW ARE YOU SO SWEET AHHHHH I ASPIRE TO BE A WRITER LIKE YOU!!

Organization: Fake it til you make it, my friends. 

Also, I have a whiteboard that has a section named: “Whatcha workin on?” where I write the fics I’m supposed to be working on that week, and I utilize my calendar to map fics out! I’ve been more sporadic due to the summer and being busier than normal/not have a set routine, but yeah. 

How long does it take?: Tbh, so long haha. But I have this thing where I usually crank most of a fic out the same day I’m writing it. So when you see me post, “How to Sell Sunshine’s next chapter will be out tonight!” that means I literally have written a couple of paragraphs and feel like I’m inspired enough to finish it the same day. Posting about it keeps me accountable. As for time, I’d say anywhere from 3 to 8 hours per chapter. (i.e. The Pact’s “Shocker” took me all day. All day. Until like 11pm. That one was one of the longest.)

Motivation: YOU GUYS ARE MY MOTIVATION!!!!!!! Like, I cannot stress that enough. Knowing that you’re out there, that you’re interested in what I write and want to see more of it, is the most motivating thing I get. 

I also have a personal beta-reader that doubles as my big sis, @baepsaetay​, and she keeps me fueled with excitement and encouragement, as well as helps in making my fics readable lol. So three cheers for her!! 

Also, never doubt the power of Pinterest. I have a board dedicated to my Tumblr fics, all sectioned out. Look, I’ll show you what my oneshot on Monday looks like in my Pinterest board!! 

So that helps me a lot to go back and get a feel for the story and get motivated to make something beautiful. Hope you’re excited for Slytherin!Tae on Monday!!

As for the last question...uwu. That is all. I’m sure you can be an even better writer than me, love!

Where are you from? What do you do? How are you feeling?

I’m from the Western United States! I’m a college student/part-time employee. I actually just quit my job last week, so I’m currently in-between jobs at the moment. Hopefully will start my next one in a week! And I’m feeling great, thank you. 

Like really really how are you and are you happy? Do you dance around when you are happy?

How did you know I dance around?? I actually do! Constantly. I am happy! I have a lot of things to be grateful for, and I’m very happy. I do write angsty things because I enjoy evoking emotions out of others and myself just as much as the fluffy stuff. But I’m doing great and loving summer!

ok! I think that wraps up this quarter’s survey! I’ll see you guys again in a few months with another survey, HOWEVER, please don’t let that stop you from chatting with me. I literally live to talk with you guys, so don’t hesitate to reach out! I’ll still keep posting random things begging for you to come chat with me, too. My dm’s are always open, the anonymous setting is on for asks, and also, if your native language is Spanish and you feel uncomfortable speaking in English, you can talk to me in Spanish! I lived in Mexico for a year and a half, so I speak good ol’ Mexican Spanish. 

Love you guys! Please stay safe this weekend, and have lots of fun! See you soon!

#b:rants #about me #survey answers #bts writer #bts author #mental health #mental health check in #kokobot

[redbeardace]

Quarantine 4: Stay Home

[This is a post for the May Carnival of Aces.]

So much is different now.

So much is the same.

I have been very fortunate so far.  The disease hasn’t touched me or anyone close to me yet.  I still have a job and am working full time.  The biggest practical impact on my life is that I no longer have a daily commute.

I see other people talking about their experiences and they’re so...  strange?

Someone remarked on my “8 days without human contact” sign, shocked that I hadn’t needed to go shopping in 8 days, that I must have really stocked up.  But I routinely go two weeks without shopping, 8 days is nothing.  I’m going on my 23rd day on this cycle and the only reason I’ll have to go shopping now is that I’m out of milk.  I still have plenty of everything else.

It’s weird to me that people seem to think that having more than three days of groceries is prepper level stockpiling.  And watching everyone make a run on the stores and seeing what they were grabbing was just baffling.  When Cascadia puts on its big show, what are these people planning to do?

People talk about how little gas they’ve been buying lately.  Welcome to my life. I have a mostly electric car and go months between fill ups.

I am truly concerned about the number of people posting “My kids are making me drink haha” jokes.  Sure, maybe it’s funny for the first few days, but if you’re still saying that on day 57, I think you seriously need to step back and look at yourself and consider if maybe you have a drinking problem.  Because you’ve spent two months talking about how you routinely drink in order to cope with the stress of your children, and that seems like you might have a problem.

Anyone know how to tell a bunch of my coworkers that they may be alcoholics in a tactful way...?

I’ve been telling a daily WFH joke on the company chat system.  I can’t keep it up anymore.  It’s gone on too long.

I’ve been making masks.

I’ve been putting hats on scarecrow owls.

I’ve been making subtle changes to the backdrop of the daily video calls for work.  Yesterday it was an vintage photo of an old man, a middle aged woman, and a teenage girl who might be a timelord, standing in a field.  Tomorrow it will be a jazzy picture of a roll of toilet paper with a face drawn on it.

It is named Sir Roland of Charmaine.

I ordered pizza delivery for the first time ever today.  I like pizza and hate people, so how come I’ve never done this before.

I haven’t had a nasty headache in weeks.

I haven’t put on any weight.

I live alone.  If I get sick, I’m going to have to take care of myself somehow.  I don’t know if I’d be able to do that.  There won’t be anyone to leave dinner at the top of the stairs.  There won’t be anyone to take me to the hospital if things get bad.  

Stuff is piling up.  Like literal stuff in literal piles.  My stairs are on the verge of becoming hazardous.  I’m not sure where all this stuff has come from.

I’m now treating my mail as hazardous material.

If I ever had to deal with actual hazardous material, I probably wouldn’t survive.

I see all these people talking about how much time they have now.  I have no extra time.  I’m feeling like I’m being an unproductive loser because I’m not going to come out of this knowing how to play the mandolin in Romanian or whatever, but I don’t have newfound free time.  Even the time gained back from the commute has vanished somewhere.

I have to have a timer at my desk so that I’ll stop working after 8-ish hours.

They’ve been giving me plastic bags at the grocery store because they refuse to use the reusable ones.  Reminds me just how much I hate plastic bags.

I have to get my house painted.  I’m kinda digging this no contact thing.  I need to take advantage of it more while it lasts.

The president is still a fascist, there’s gun-toting nutjobs on the loose who aim to kill us all one way or another, and the MURDER HORNETS ARE HERE.

Seriously.  The Murder Hornets are here.  WTF.

I’ve mostly been in good shape.  Two incidents threw me off balance.  

I lost a notecard of WFH jokes.  That was kind of a last straw situation, where I had to shuffle and strain to try to make a usable workspace and nothing was going right and even after a best attempt, the chair didn’t fit and I didn’t fit because I never fit and now there’s all sorts of stuff in my hallway that doesn’t belong there and what am I going to do with it all and I didn’t want to do any of this and NOW WHERE IN THE HELL IS MY NOTE CARD BECAUSE IT WAS RIGHT HERE AND I WAS CAREFUL WITH IT AND WHERE DID IT GO AND HOW DID I LOSE IT IT LITERALLY WENT SEVEN FEET AT MOST AND I’VE SEARCHED THE WHOLE AREA A DOZEN TIMES AND HOW COULD IT JUST DISAPPEAR LIKE THAT.

The latest Stay At Home order extension.  I knew it was coming, but just running the calendar out based on the dates they were saying and extrapolating for the dates they weren’t saying, and coming up with the middle of July at the earliest and just...

Somehow, the loss of the Pride Parade didn’t hit me that hard.  It should have.

Quarantine beards.  I don’t get it.  I mean, I’m lazy about shaving, but this I don’t understand.  Also, I’m pretty much incapable of growing a proper quarantine beard.  I grow in a month what others do in a few days.

I cut my own hair.  I’ve got electric clippers.  It’s really not that hard and it doesn’t involve potentially giving the plague to any barbers or pretending that democracy is threatened by my bangs getting a bit too long.  Of course, I only do it about once a year.  This is around the time of year that I do it, though.

I’ve worn pants every day.  Regular pants.  Not PJs or sweat pants.  But pants pants.  You all really not wearing pants?  Maybe I’ll wear a skirt one day to mix things up.

I have been routinely testing my sense of smell.  Haven’t lost it yet.

There’s stuff I want to do, but I don’t feel like doing any of it.  There are time-sensitive projects I want to do, but I don’t really want to sit in front of the computer for the time it would take to make it happen.  Because I sit in front a computer in my house all day for work now and there’s no energy left for anything more.  Not that there was energy for that stuff before.

Am I supposed to support the economy by ordering from local businesses online or save the lives of delivery workers by only ordering essential things?  And how come when I ordered a bunch of stuff from a place that claims they’re prioritizing essential items, the one thing that I ordered that could be considered essential was the last thing they shipped?

I had a Nigerian organized crime ring file for unemployment in my name.  The state’s apparently lost millions in this scheme.  I don’t understand how that can be.  It seems like “Don’t Send Money To Nigeria” would be a pretty straightforward check in the system.

Oh.  Wait.  I’m a software engineer who’s spent my time on the quality and reliability side of the house.  I can totally see something like that getting deprioritized and won’t-do’d.

Also had my credit card number stolen and used on a wild shopping spree.  Not sure if that’s ‘rona-related.  It’s the credit card I use for all my online shopping.  So that’s all on hold at the moment.

My car battery died.  I had to use a battery pack to jump it.  Fun fact:  I drive a plug-in hybrid, which had been plugged in this whole time.  Apparently the 12v battery doesn’t get charged by the wall plug.  Which seems really weird to me.

I see lots of people complaining about how they can’t have sex right now or how dating is weird.  So not a problem for me.

#carnival of aces #overreactions from the outbreak

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #274

“now i can hear the marching feet / they’re moving into the street”

What color was the last swimsuit you wore? I only have a black one. Is your dream job attainable? I mean define “dream job.” I’d ideally be a meerkat biologist if I was willing to live in Africa and could handle even mild heat, but I can’t/won’t do either of those, so it’s not obtainable to me. I’d also love to be a paleontologist if I could travel and handle heat once more, but again, I can’t. My only *attainable* dream job is being a photographer, which I am aiming for. I’d LIKE to focus on nature/wildlife photography, but that’s unlikely to be able to support me, so. Do you have to go to school or work tomorrow? N/A Have you slept for longer than usual today? Yes, but only because of my nightmares. I tend to take at least two (though sometimes one) hour-long naps during the day because if I wake up once during the night, as I usually do, I’m fucked because I’m very likely to have an intense nightmare. It seems like the medicine I’m on wears off with consciousness, I guess. I only allow myself to sleep an hour at daytime because my mother has noticed if I have a nightmare, it’s usually no earlier than one hour into sleep. Even then I still have them occasionally. Have you ever taken classes for a musical instrument? Recorder in elementary school was necessary for whatever stupid reason, and then I played the flute for years. Out of school, I took guitar lessons for a while. I got semi-decent (at best I could do the intro to “Crazy Train” at normal speed, I think), but it didn’t last because it was annoying/time-consuming to build up the calluses that make playing painless, I was really bad at overthinking where my fingers were, and I just wasn’t invested quite enough. I’ll tell you, it gave me mad respect for guitarists, that shit isn’t easy by any means. Have you ever been on vacation with someone other than your family? Yes, though it was brief. I was a kid (okay, pre-teen, w/e) still in my separation anxiety from Mom phase and it was literally because of me we had to go home. I still feel shitty about it, though no one seemed upset at me. How old do you think you’ll be when you move out on your own? Who the fuck even knows anymore. Do you have a job? If so, where do you work? If not, do you want one? No; N/A; yes ultimately but no at the current moment because I have to keep watch over Mom. If you wear make-up, which brand of foundation/powder do you use? N/A Would you call yourself a “people” person? Nope. What is one change you need to make in your life this month? Just one??? What’s been tugging on your heart lately? My PTSD plus self-image has been very, very bad. What is the last thing you did that made you feel guilty? Mom had to clean up my cat’s projectile vomit even though she’s supposed to stay away from this kinda stuff through chemo. I literally cannot fucking touch vomit, never mind what came out of him that night. I felt like absolute fucking shit and I still do because WOW I’m a great adult right!! Do you have any physical traits that are bothering you lately? Like, everything. What kind of dog is your favorite? I’m biased to beagles. What was the last thing you received in the mail? A book. What is the last thing you wrote? Like, physically? My signature at the doctor’s office. Do you still care about the person you first kissed? Way fucking more than I should. Do you require a lot of private time? Definitely more than most people. Do you have any songs currently stuck in your head? I haven’t listened to it in forever for ~reasons~, yet “The Mortician’s Daughter” is stuck in my head badly and really needs to fuck off. What was the last song you downloaded? I dunno, I went on a download binge a while back. Have you ever read a really funny book? I remember at least one. “Bite Me” by IDR-Who. Some vampire satire. Have you ever done something humiliating while drunk? Never reached the point of being drunk. How would you react if your celebrity crush came to your door? fuckin YIKES I am NOT attractive rn go away Has your mom/dad ever walked in on you kissing or anything more with someone? HAHA my mom has always had the decency to knock, not so much his mom a;lwkejrewoei but the answer’s still no. What electronics are in your room? (DVD player, CD player, etc) This laptop, my phone, a Nintendo DS, my iPod… Do you have a box anywhere with special items you'll to keep forever in it? Yes, actually. Grew up calling them “treasure boxes.” Do you have any pictures of yourself on your bedroom walls? Lol no, I’d definitely prefer to not see myself as much as I can. That sounds melodramatic, but I’m being serious. It either depresses me or makes me angry. Does your dad collect anything? The Cleveland Browns’ football team stuff, for one. Maybe Carolina Hurricane stuff, too? Idk. I don’t live with him and don’t go in his “man cave” at his house often ha ha. What's better, a desktop or laptop? Explain. A laptop. Portable; that’s all the explanation ya really need. Do your parents still hide chocolate eggs around on Easter for you? Nah. What do you typically do on Easter Day? We go to my sister’s house to watch the kids do their egg hunting and open their gifts, then we usually go to Ashley’s in-laws’ for dinner. Is there anyone you literally need to exist? Apparently not. Thought so. Never let yourself into that state of mind. What would you prefer to get from a guy/girl: flowers, a hand-written poem, a picture he drew of you or a nice night out? Oh, a hand-written poem would wreck me, yeesh. Or a drawing. But any would be very sweet. Do you remember why you made the last mistake you did? I don’t know the most recent mistake, but probably because I’m just in general a terrified person who second-guesses or overanalyzes everything. Did you check how many calories the last thing you ate had? Yes. I’m back on my calorie-counting obsession again. Are your nails long or short? Short, always. I can’t keep them long. What is your favorite kind of cookie? Just the ordinary chocolate chip is fine. What was the last compliment you received? I don’t know. Who will be the next person you kiss? I normally delete this question because the answer should be so obvious, but I feel like just pointing it out that no one fucking knows who they’re gonna kiss next. It’s a dangerous mindset. Don’t make assumptions about what you’ll have even tomorrow. Have you ever made your own icon? Yeah, on many sites. They’re just about always just edits, though, not truly original work. What color is your computer mouse? It’s black. Have you ever been sung to on your birthday in a restaurant? Yes. Do you like black olives? I don’t like olives period. Do you actually think there will be a zombie apocolypse? Personally, no. I do think it’s scientifically possible, we already see this in insects, but I just don’t imagine it happening to humans before we’re our own downfall. Do you like the person you’ve become over the past years? Fuck no. Have you ever gone to church just to get a significant other? … No…? Have you ever punched a wall out of complete anger? No, that shit is terrifying. Are you really ticklish? YES don’t fucking touch me. How do you decide what you're going to eat each day? I just follow what I’m craving that day. How are you similar to your siblings? Different? Compared to Ashley and Nicole at least, I can’t think of any real similarities off the top of my head. They’re intelligent, motivated, outgoing, successful, yada yada, then there’s me. What's your favorite type of non-fiction literature? Autobiographies by people I’m actually interested in. Do you believe in souls? Soulmates? Souls, absolutely. Soulmates, no. It’s fairytale ideation to think your soul has a perfect match with another, hate to break it to ya. Favorite soundtrack? BITCH don’t make me choose between Shadow of the Colossus and Silent Hill 2. Fucking masterpieces. Pianos or guitars? *shrugs* Depends on the music and my mood. Did an animal ever bite you? Never seriously. How many languages do you speak? Only English fluently. I’m poor at German by now. Wiggly worms or bumble bees? Worms gross me out, bees are Good Boys. Religion? I don’t really identify with any. I just believe there’s some form of ultimate intelligence and essences beyond just the body, and that’s all I even pretend to know. Fog, thunder, or rain? Fog gives me that Silent Hill Vibe *Italian kiss* What regret keeps coming back to haunt you daily? The way I treated Jason after the breakup. If you could cure yourself of one allergy, what would it be? Damn pollen. Do you know anyone else with your name? Yeah. What would you be most afraid of happening if you were to visit Africa? Viruses or botflies. Where are you tempted to move to sometimes? I very legitimately want to live in Canada by now, but I won’t because I’m not moving that far from family. Who seems like they have the perfect life? I try not to make that assumption of anyone. Do you ever take pictures of negative moments? Does taking pictures of roadkill count???? lmao probably Do you think it would be a good idea to post photos of negative moments as well as positive? Well… I guess it depends. Like ngl, the pictures some people share of them having panic attacks to just show how fucking real they are definitely touch you, as do those depicting poverty, etc., BUT I really do think there are limits and also differences in motivations. What time zone are you in? EST. Would you ever post a picture of yourself crying on social media? Wow, speaking of. No. ^Why or why not? I am an UGLY cry-er, my man. But I also just don’t want people to see that, and it’s definitely not on my mind to take a picture during a breakdown. What was the last thing you cried about? My life. Have you ever held a newborn baby? Yes. Do you know anyone who has twins? Yes. Where do you buy calendars from? I don’t. Do you shop at the dollar store often? Not *often*, but we’ll stop by for a snack or something sometimes. Are you following in the career path of any family members? No. Do you feel you missed out on a lot as a kid? I guess in some ways. Who was that best friend you ever had? Sara. What color is your laptop? Black. What are five careers you think you’d be good at? My work history has shown I can’t do shit right. Are you thriving in your life right now? lmao no one is in 2020. Who do you have moral support from? My family, doctor, and a few friends. Who encourages you to go after your dreams? The same as above. Do you have people in your family who want you dead? Wow, I hope not. Do you have a walk-in closet? No, but my room at the new house will. :’) Not that I need one, it’s just pretty cool. How do you feel about people like Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and Jeff Bezos having so much power and control in the world? Do you believe that any one person should have so much power? Let’s be real, in our current world, money is power, and no one should have that much control of the world, especially if your intentions are bad. NOW I don’t know jack shit about any of those are far as morals go, but just saying. It’s dangerous. Has your anxiety alone ever prevented you from doing something you wanted to do? This is ACTUALLY the story of my fucking life. Do you enjoy reading stories and novels that are heavily stylistic, poetic, or unconventional or do you prefer your prose to follow a familiar grammatical structure? Okay, I LOVE those, like Johnny Got His Gun and The Handmaid’s Tale that’s kinda like, run-on writing. Just letting a train of thought go. Those are two of the most powerful books I’ve ever read and they’re both written in a unique fashion. Have you ever fallen for any sort of Internet-based hoax? (e.g., fake celeb death, satire news article…) I’m sure at some point, especially as a kid. Do you tend to read reviews before you watch a movie or read a book? What do you hope to get out of doing so? NO. I don’t wanna have any precognition. When you go to a concert, how far must you travel for the most usual venues you visit? Most are on the other end of the state, and NC is long, so. We’re lucky if they come to Raleigh. Do you rent movies frequently? I never do, really. What is your favorite thing to do outside? Take pictures or swim. What’s your favorite meal to cook? I don’t cook. What movie has been taken WAY too far, as far as sequels go? Oh, I’m sure there are some, but none immediately come to mind. I’m not that into movies. Do you refuse to eat certain foods because of what they look like? Yes. I am VERY poor at getting past how a food looks. What are you listening to? NSP’s cover of “Don’t Fear The Reaper.” It’s fuckin gorgeous. How much homework do you have tonight? N/A Are you wearing any bracelets? Yes; one that Sara got me as well as an ovarian cancer awareness one. What's physically wrong with you right now? JINKIES I just feel really lethargic like always. Do you take any medications daily? Ha ha thanks for actually reminding me I need to now. When was the last time you moved to a new house? Two years ago, and now we’ll be moving to a much better place by the end of this month/early September, finally. When it comes to relationships, are you the jealous type? Nah. Which gift cards do you have in your wallet? Idk actually. It’s not like I use it a lot. Can you remember the last time you felt ill? What was wrong with you? A few nights ago. I was extremely hot, dizzy, and pretty nauseated. I was fine, though. If you wear make-up, do you take it with you, to reapply throughout the day? Does your make-up stay for a long time after you first apply it, or do you find that you need to reapply often? Are you wearing any make-up atm? I pretty much never wear makeup so have never really had a reason to reapply it. I’m definitely not wearing any now. Does your kitchen have a theme? No. Do you like ice cream sandwiches? GIRL yes. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? Earbuds. They’re more comfortable imo but more importantly block out exterior noise very well. Are you a fan of any independent films? ngl, I don’t know exactly what that is and I don’t feel like looking it up. Could you possibly write a successful novel? I very genuinely think some of the RP stories I’ve taken part in are novel-worthy, yes. I wanted to make them books when I was younger, but now I no longer do mainly because there are areas that are just way too fucking dark that I don’t wanna put out there but play massive parts in the stories, so like… Do you regularly watch the news? I never do. Facebook is my “news” source lmao. Who was the last person you video-chatted with? I don’t remember for sure, maybe some doctor? What do you want the theme of your wedding to be? I don’t really think about this, seeing as my mind has changed enough, and it also depends on what my partner wants, too. Have you ever been caught passing a note in class? Noooo, I absolutely hated passing notes because I was genuinely a good student. I only did so very, very rarely if another friend started it. Have you ever had dandruff? I have dandruff AND a dry scalp. It’s a wonderful mix. Have you ever gone through a phase of crushing on EVERYONE? Definitely not. Do you have any clothes with spikes/studs on them? I have a spiked choker, and I might still have gloves with studs? Can you remember what you last clapped for? My mom’s birthday! :’) Have you ever given a pet to someone else? Yes, with cats; we had to do that quite often when I was a kid because we had so many cats, none which we could afford to fix. Then we’ve done it with two dogs we just couldn’t handle. Oh yeah, I gave my iguana away too because he was too high maintenance for me, but also because he DESPERATELY needed a much bigger terrarium, which we couldn’t afford. I absolutely could not watch him in that tiny tank. I miss him a LOT, but he went to a wonderful home! The lady who adopted him sent me pictures upon pictures months after taking him in. Do you know anyone named Walter? No. What's your least favorite ice-cream flavor? Strawberry is fucking disgusting. And that’s coming from someone whose favorite fruit is strawberries. What's your least favorite song by your favorite artist? I’m not sure. There’s a handful that just don’t grab my attention that I don’t even remember them. What was the last good news you heard? I can FINALLY talk to my psychiatrist tomorrow. Who’s your favorite singer of all time? Probably Freddie Mercury. What airline do you fly most? Idk, I don’t really pay attention. I haven’t flown very often though anyway. Do you have a dog that is destructive? I don’t have a dog. What’s one TV series you’ve seen every episode of? Meerkat Manor is the most obvious, ha ha. Maaaaany times. Assuming you have Facebook, who last left you a wallpost? Probably my friend Sammi. Assuming you have hair, how are you wearing it today? It’s too short for me to “wear” it any particular way. It’s just… there lmao. Assuming you're not homeless, what kind of living arrangements do you have? I live with my mom in a house she’s renting. Have you or have you ever considered messing around with the same sex? I’m bisexual so you can guess I’m not opposed to it. Are you particular about any brands of food you will or will not eat? Are there any restaurants you refuse to go to? Brands, no. I don’t eat Chick-fil-a because they’re run by fucking homophobic bigots that monetarily support conversion therapy and other anti-LGBT projects. I’m not giving you any fucking money. What was the most current dream you can remember about? Do you generally dream every night, or hardly at all? It was actually last night, when I dreamed about accidentally running into Jason where I last knew he worked, and he was really hostile. If I don’t take my medicine, I always have nightmares when I sleep.

#survey #quiz #questions #questionnaire

[neverwatchedonepiece]

511-513: "Unexpected Relanding! Luffy, to Marineford!", "With Hopes It Will Reach My Friends! Big News Spreading Fast!" and "Pirates Get On the Move! Astounding New World!"

Lafitte showing off his soft skills.

Now these three episodes were worth every minute! This is, hand on heart, my favourite part of any arc epilogue: when the seeds of new plots are sown and you get to see what everyone else is up to.

And there was a lot of that in 511-513.

I’m still messing with the format. I’ll stick with the three days a week posts but watching six episodes at a time was too much. The post ended up way too long and I couldn’t get into much speculation (which is the most fun part). Three at a time might be a better balance. :)

Luffy’s Message

This was the Main Event for me. It was why I was so keen to watch the next lot of episodes. That cliffhanger drawn out over so many episodes! What could have caused the Strawhats to react so spectacularly? What the hell was Rayleigh up to? Why all the secrecy?

And most of all...

Why the hell would Luffy go back to Marineford?

The answer? He wanted to send a message. And Rayleigh had crafted his plan so skillfully that this message would be different depending on which side a character was on.

The build up was great. 511 opened with a Marine debriefing meeting. Marines were getting the hairdryer treatment because Monkey D. Luffy, the notorious rookie pirate, had not only escaped their grasp but had the audacity to return to the scene of the crime with the Traitor Jimbei and The Dark King Rayleigh.

This was not good PR. And we all know the Marines are all about PR.

What happened was this: a lone Marine ship sailed right into the bay without clearance and fired a blank. Then three figures were spotted on board: Luffy, Rayleigh and Jimbei. Of course, they were fired on. The ship caught fire and sunk, but Luffy leapt ashore with Rayleigh and Jimbei and set about... doing some really weird stuff.

He rung the Ox Lloyd’s Bell (a Marine tradition, apparently. It’s rung at New Year: eight times to salute the passing year and another eight to welcome the new). Okay, I thought. I have no idea what this means. Let’s see where this goes.

It became a bit clearer when Luffy walked through the dumbstruck crowd, laid flowers into the chasm and removed his hat in a gesture of respect. Okay, I thought, this is funeral stuff. He’s returning to Marineford to pay his respects to Ace. This was to give Luffy closure so he could continue to live his life without being crippled by guilt and depression.

Except it was bigger than that, but I didn’t realise it until Luffy, Rayleigh and Jimbei exited via getaway whale sharks and the action returned to the debriefing meeting. The Marine in charge was Oda’s mouthpiece. Ringing the Ox Lloyd’s bell was a challenge. Luffy rang out the old Pirate Era and rang in the new one. That Rayleigh (symbol of the Old Era) was at his side was Significant. The Marines believe that Rayleigh has backed Luffy to be Roger’s successor. (This might be true. It was Rayleigh’s plan, after all. He knows all about pirate symbolism and how to make a statement. He was on Roger’s crew.)

Annoyingly, I didn’t realise the Return to Marineford would also be like the bat signal to the Strawhats until Vivi picked up the newspaper and I saw that photo of Luffy (I’m still salty she didn’t join the crew).

And I noticed something interesting. Those tattoos Vivi mentioned. 3D2Y. I have seen that combination of numbers and letters before on the CR arc list. Does this mean Luffy will only reunite with the Strawhats in 3D2Y (whatever that is)? According to the arc list, I have Fishman Island to go first.

I also have no idea what 3D2Y could mean. Maybe it’s a calendar thing? 3D is crossed out (the old pirate era) and 2Y is the new pirate era? Maybe it’s a new model of Star Wars droid. I have no clue.

But I can’t wait to find out! :D

The Strawhats

Of course, the Strawhats picked up on it right away. (Vivi did too, which is why you should have joined the crew, Vivi, why do you have to be such a good and dutiful noble?)

Zoro’s and Chopper’s reactions to the Marineford Return were most in-depth, so I’ll talk about them here just now. I’m assuming from the 514 preview that we’ll get Sanji, Nami, Usopp, Robin, Franky and Brook later.

They didn’t give us much of Zoro here. It was a short scene but his reaction was the most interesting. While the other Strawhats said: “Awesome, Luffy. Got the message!” Zoro was actually suspicious.

“Luffy doesn’t do sneaky, clever stuff like that!” he said to Perona. “This must be Rayleigh’s plan.”

Clearly, Zoro knows Luffy so well at this point that he can tell Luffy’s style of planning. I liked that.

And Chopper...

I still have that major soft spot for Chopper. I still cannot watch the flashbacks of his past without tearing up. Every time Chopper cries, I kind of want to take him aside and say, “Shhh, Chopper. I can’t handle your little reindeer tears.”

It was when Chopper returned to Birdie Kingdom that the penny dropped. The Strawhats wouldn’t reunite yet. They all have to go through training. Now everything from the last few episodes made sense. Maybe the Strawhats I thought would get away without training will have to do it after all.

And Chopper definitely got a good deal here. That library! I was as shocked as Chopper (but at least I didn’t say it out loud, haha, that was funny).

Chopper’s loyalty to Luffy and the Strawhats has upped a few levels post-Sabaody. He said something really interesting (and kind of worrying). Remembering his past, when he was reviled as a monster - outcast from human and reindeer society - he never wanted to go through something like Sabaody again and is now willing to “become a real monster for Luffy.”

Wow... Chopper’s about to get an upgrade. I mean, he’s always had so much potential. Monster Point, anyone? Those Rumble Balls? And he’s a great medic? Hopefully, Oda has good things planned for Chopper.

And speaking of plans... not all is well in the World Government hierarchy! I wouldn’t like to say they deserve it, but... they deserve it.

The Gorosei?

I think that’s who these guys are. I counted five in the shot and they are all old guys in suits, so I’ll go with it for now. There was no confirmation in the episode. Neither were names given, so I’ve made some up. I feel like I need to distinguish them because they all seem to have a different take on the post-Marineford situation.

Ringlets was worried about Luffy. He is a controversial figure. Of course, Luffy is Garp’s grandson, so that is a given.

Saruman was concerned about smoke rising from Mount Doom... Nah, kidding. He’s worried how Luffy knows Rayleigh. He thinks Rayleigh won’t return to centre stage but implies that maybe Rayleigh will support Luffy from the shadows.

Handlebar was salty about Jimbei. Was annoyed he finally turned against them as he was a symbol of intertribal peace. (The ‘finally’ implies they always suspected Jimbei would snap one day.)

Baldy was concerned about the imbalance of power in pirate society. There is a vacant Yonkou seat and THREE to fill in the shichibukai. How to fill those vacancies? Is there anyone qualified left? Glasses was also annoyed that the D. names were receiving so much PR lately and making the WG look bad.

Blonde has his eye on the New World. The power structure imbalance there now Whitebeard is gone is troublesome. They will have to choose the strongest to be Shichibukai. He also gave us an update on Blackbeard, which was nice. Wasn’t expecting to hear from Teach for ages!

Apparently, Teach has already made waves in the New World. He has an advantage over others who want that Yonkou seat because he knows everything there is to know about Whitebeard’s territory.  No one has ever eaten two Devil Fruits in history except for him. Only another Yonkou or Marco and the remaining Whitebeards could take him out. Is that a statement on Blackbeard’s new power level? Is he training too, so he’ll be an effective adversary for Luffy by the time they inevitably clash again the New World?

I have my fingers crossed for it.

And there’s something else the Gorosei should be worried about...

Human Resources Will Be Snowed Under Right Now

I forgot who Kong-san is, but I bet he has his work cut out for him right now.

There are a lot of changes afoot at WG and Marine HQ. The biggest shocker is that SENGOKU HAS RESIGNED!

I am so happy about this. Now, all he has to do is join the Revolutionary Army and I’m all set.

Garp continues to exasperate. He has “virtually resigned” but lacks whatever he needs to be truly brave and take that final step. He has kept the Vice Admiral title and is now tutoring younger Marines. I suppose it’s good he’s still around to keep whippersnappers like Akainu in check, especially now Sengoku did not recommend Akainu to succeed him.

Aokiji, the mystery wrapped in an enigma, will be Fleet-Admiral.

I... it’s weird. I can’t see it yet, but it’s definitely a better choice than Akainu. Maybe he would’ve been better with Kizaru. Oh well, it’s Sengoku’s choice. I trust him. He’s a wise man. “Old soldiers shouldn’t cling to power,” he said. “Justice is based on values and those change every generation.”

He ain’t wrong.

And I’m guessing now Garp is training young Marines that Coby, WHO HAS AWAKENED HAKI, will be first on the list. Here’s another one who will go through training to become a worthy opponent of Luffy.

Smoker also went to see Aokiji and requested a transfer to G5 branch. Aokiji had doubts. “That’s not a place you go voluntarily.” Apparently, G5 means Grand Line, 5th Branch. It’s in the New World. Smoker wants a New World placement.

I cannot handle this much awesome.

To Top It All Off, The Pink One Is Also Causing Trouble

How can he sit like that? Surely that is not in any way comfortable?

Remember when he ambushed Moria at Marineford? Turns out he didn’t quite get the job done (phew!) I should stick to my No Corpse, No Death rule more often.

In the words of Doflamingo.... “Poof!”

Moria disappeared just before Doflamingo landed the final blow. He insisted Moria was dying, so even if he did get away, he wouldn’t go far. Unless he came back as a zombie. (You joke, Doflamingo, but I would not put that past Moria for one reason: Hogback!)

The WG official accused him of sloppy work. Then Doflamingo lost his cool. I’ve never seen him act like that before, so it was interesting. “Who do you think you’re talking to? When did you become my boss? When I lose interest in doing business with you guys, I’ll quit being a Shichibukai at any time.”

I guess this really highlights the tenuous relationship the Marines have with these guys. Plus, Doflamingo seems like he’s Mr Chaotic Evil (or at least Mr Neutral Evil) incarnate, so maybe not the best guy to rely on?

Especially when the New World has descended into utter chaos.

So Who’s All Enjoying The New World?

Everyone who is anyone will head there eventually. Crocodile and Daz Bones will have another crack at it. Law has plans but is content to wait for his time (smart). The Strawhats, obviously, are a Work in Progress.

Buggy has reunited with his old crew (I forgot about Richie the Lion. How dare I?) and also has a massive bunch of Impel Down followers. Maybe he’ll have a crack at it too, now he has Alvida and Galdino to be the strategists? Plus, he just got that letter from the WG. Maybe he’ll end up on the run.

The rest of the Rookies have ventured out.

As for the Supernovas (sans Law and Luffy) I have predictions.

Who Will Make It:

The most obvious candidate is Kidd. He’s made for the cruelty of the New World, has already crushed another crew and has declared himself an enemy of Luffy. Sweet. Battle points.

Hawkins is another one who has crushed a crew. Again, battle points.

Apoo isn’t dumb. He’ll run if he has to. Smart points.

The Jury’s Out:

Urouge has stumbled across The Thunder Plains (from Final Fantasy X) and met some weird old ladies who look like they’ve just stepped out of Macbeth.

Who’s Probably Not Okay:

Gang Bege’s ship is in fragments. X-Drake has just clashed with Kaido’s crew. I don’t see them lasting much longer.

And Jewelry Bonney...

When Your Fave Is Problematic

Hard pass, Teach. A very hard pass.

I loved how the intro caption to this scene was: “Some Burning Island”. Then I saw the Blackbeards and thought, “Praise Oda! My villainous faves have returned in style!”

I thought the only news I would get on them was from the Gorosei. This was a nice bonus.

Of course, they were bickering. The Blackbeards always bicker and snipe at each other. There was a definite tone change here, though, as though Oda wants to step their villainy up a gear.

Take their argument over the ship they sailed in on. Teach said, “We should have stolen a Marine ship. The Raft wasn’t great.” Shiryu’s retort was tolerated: “You guys don’t prepare for anything.” But Avalo Pizarro’s (I finally know his name!) joke, “Want me to be captain, Teach?” earned him this response from Lafitte: “Shut up or I’ll kill you. We are Blackbeard Pirates.”

Teach is gaining more authority and loyalty from his crew. The ones who have always been with him are fiercely loyal and the newer ones have yet to learn the ropes. Lafitte (is he the first mate?) is also flexing. Do I sense tension between the established and newer members of the crew? Maybe, but they seem to get along well enough.

Among the new ones, I already have the ones I like (Shiryu and Catalina) vs the ones I’m not keen on (Avalo, San Juan and Vasco. Their personalities haven’t really emerged yet, so there’s time).

While the island burned, the Blackbeards stuck around necking Jacky D (haha!) because they were waiting for the Marines.

Why? Were they about to do another deal?

Yeah... but not one I was expecting.

They had crushed Bonney’s crew, chained her up and were about to trade her in for a ship.

That was shocking. I hadn’t expected Bonney to catch up to Teach so quickly and be defeated, but the outcome wasn’t surprising. Of course Teach would do that. He’d done it to Ace before and it worked. Sasuga Teach, I guess. What he did next stepped up his villainy a few notches.

He turned on lech mode, which I didn’t know was in his repertoire.

“I can’t believe they gave you a hundred million bounty! The New World is the sea for the chosen strong ones. You can all the way from South Blue. But you’ll go no further. You’re too weak to join my crew, but you can come with me, if you become my girl.”

Her response was excellent. “SCREW YOU, YOU BEARDED PIG!”

Honestly, Teach. You deserved that. And you were shocked at the rejection? You were going to get the Hard Pass. Apart from being a traitorous, murdering scumbag, you’re also a rubbish flirt. I mean, expecting her to go out with you after you beat up her crew, called her weak and laid her out as bait for the Marines? Not a great sell, Teach. Work on your people skills, like Lafitte.

Their plan went awry when Van Augr spotted Akainu on the approaching ship. Obviously, he would not do any deal (and I bet he’s steaming mad Aokiji will be Fleet Admiral before him). So they scarpered.

I’m worried for Bonney, though. Akainu picking her up? That’s the worst luck... :(

TEAM SELFIE AFTER A HARD DAY’S PILLAGING! #blackbeards #nofilter #okayonefilter

#one piece #neverwatchedonepiece #nwop #never watched one piece #monkey d. luffy #monkey d. garp #sengoku #fleet admiral sengoku #roronoa zoro #tony tony chopper #strawhats #silvers rayleigh #dark king rayleigh #jimbei #jinbei #portgas d. ace #nefertari vivi #sir crocodile #daz bones #mr 1 #gorosei #donquixote doflamingo #doflamingo #admiral aokiji #aokiji #admiral akainu #akainu #sakazuki #admiral kizaru #kizaru

[blame-canada]

I Think - Crenny

Kenny is just starting to tiptoe into the realm of boyfriend terminology with Craig when he gives him a gift he could never repay him for. The way to Kenny's heart is his family, after all, and with the way he's gotten to see all their smiles so brightly this Christmas Eve, he's about ready to pop the question. He thinks, though, he thinks.

Hello everyone! I was given the opportunity to post the Secret Santa gift fic that I wrote for @kotaii-san! It’s some Christmas Eve fluff, just in time for Christmas Eve. It’s a bit long to be posting on Tumblr, but I guess that’s what cuts are for, haha. I hope you enjoy. :) Read it on AO3 here!

“I don’t mean to be a bratty teenager, but this sucks.”

The words hurt Kenny more than he wants to let on. At thirteen, Karen has had her fair share of pubescent girl meltdowns, and Kenny’s cleaned up the aftermath more times than he can count. In Kevin’s defense, he’s helped too, but the older he’s gotten, the more detached he’s become. His mother tries, sometimes, but more often than not she gets so overwhelmed so quickly that before Karen’s even done screaming, she’s reaching for the nearest illicit drug. It’s frustrating, but it’s life, he supposes, and Kenny sometimes wonders if in a different world he could have been dealt a better hand. It’s not worth the trouble to dwell on it now though, because the three of them are busy sitting huddled in the center of the living room, touching shoulders for warmth because the heat is at a bare minimum, and finding patterns in the stains on the carpet with their mouths shut and their fingers curled around small hands of cards.

“It’s not your fault,” she adds on, because apparently he hadn’t hid his disappointment well enough to keep it a secret and she reads him like a book anyway. “You do your best. It just kinda sucks.”

Kevin shivers while he nods, and the guilt in the pit of Kenny’s stomach weighs him to the floor so that he sinks further into the circle they’ve made, nearly touches noses with the discard pile. Sometimes in December he dreams of Stan’s house, or even Cartman’s, where it’s warm and there are soft lights and candles everywhere and pine needles wrapped around the banisters and fallen on the tree skirt that adorns the very bottom of their Christmas trees.

The McCormicks have never had a Christmas tree. He isn’t sure if it’s because his parents never thought it was important, couldn’t afford it, or both. He’d been planning on surprising them all with one this year with a meager savings he’d accumulated from the jobs he’s been working to help pay the bills, but it had to go to an emergency window fix, the glass punched out in a fit of rage. Kevin’s hand is still scabbed over and bruised on the knuckles.

“Do you think mom will be home in time? For midnight? Uno,” Karen asks as she drops a card onto the pile, because for some reason they still care that their family is together while the calendar turns to the twenty-fifth. Their father walked out ages ago, which was probably for the best. Now their mother works late into the night and early in the morning, and they don’t see her very much anymore. Kenny understands, but they all miss her, regardless of how horrible she can still be. It’s not a perfect place, and maybe when they move out they’ll each have their own revelations about just how toxic and abusive the household they came from was, but for now it’s all they’ve got.

“Dunno, Kare,” Kevin mutters, and Kenny puts his cards facedown on the ground to pat the top of her head instead. She protests with a whine and ducks away, but he still messes up the top layer of her thin hair. When she straightens up, she’s smiling, and Kenny smiles too.

“Love ya, kiddo,” Kenny says, because they don’t say ‘Merry Christmas,’ because it doesn’t really mean anything. They never were taught the story of Santa Claus. There isn’t much merry about their seance for warmth in a cold, dark house.

“Love you too, Kenny,” she replies, her voice small and fragile, and she adds, “love you too, Kevin.” Kevin grunts.

They finish their game and fall back into silence, and Kenny reaches for his phone, practically a burner several years out of circulation. He has a new text message, and he feels a flutter in his chest, because the name of the sender is a short string of emojis and there’s only one person in his contacts without a regular name.

His phone buzzes in his hand as another text comes in, from the same tiny spaceship between two stars.

   You home

   Answer if youre up for a good time :P

Kenny licks his lips, glances up at his siblings while he contemplates the offer. They’re each using one earbud to listen to music. The screen from the old iPod they still use is lighting up their faces, because night is setting in and the last drops of sunlight are fading from their profiles so that they turn to silhouettes. Ordinarily he would say yes, of course, in a heartbeat, because his spaceship crush is a deadly combination of addicting and rare. Tonight he hesitates though, because it is Christmas Eve, and as he realizes this, he thinks to ask him why he’s looking for a quick visit today of all days.

  tf u doin xmas eve that u wanna fuck around instead @_@?

The response is almost immediate. His spaceship is always lightning-fast, the same way it traverses the galaxies like ponds and hops stars like lily pads.

   Nothing important

Before Kenny can reply, he sends another.

  Thats not true. Im doing important stuff. Which is why I need to know if you are part of the important stuff.

Kenny sighs. Though it’s tempting, and he feels like maybe it’s selfish, his family needs him more. Maybe they’re fine, he doesn’t know. It just doesn’t feel right.

   i gotta spedn it w the fam dude. xmas sux but u kno. its family

  *spend

There is a long pause in which Kenny does nothing but stare at his phone. There isn’t much to do on it like the newer models, so it feels like more of a brick than anything else. He switches between watching the clock tick by and watching his brother and sister share music together. It’s approaching eleven, and he isn’t sure his mother will make it home in time after all. The pile of cards they’ve abandoned sits neatly at their feet. The brick vibrates.

   Well. Dont go anywhere.

Kenny’s curiosity is piqued, but he’s not sure if it’s too forward to ask what he’s talking about. His spaceship likes to keep secrets sometimes, within its indestructible metal walls. That’s not quite true, Kenny corrects, because he knows how to destruct it, and it’s one of his favorite things to do. The faint high of excitement and nerves makes his stomach flip, and he tucks his phone away in his pocket, reaching out to hold Kev and Karen’s hands again per tradition.

Karen drops her head on Kenny’s shoulder and starts to doze off then, and he starts blinking away sleepiness himself as the ambient noise of his house lulls him to sleep. He doesn’t want to fall asleep though, so he keeps snapping back up to attention, jolting his head up and blinking his eyes rapidly awake. Kevin seems to be doing the same thing, and eventually, Karen starts gently snoring against him. He adjusts his arm so she can rest her head on his lap and in her sleepy stupor she obeys- something she hasn’t done since she was nine years old. He pets her head with his now free hand and tries not to think about how much she deserves better.

A knock on the front door startles all three of them so that they sit up straight, and Karen gasps as she returns to the waking world. “Mom?” Kevin asks, and Kenny shakes his head.

“Nah, she don’t knock. Lemme check by the window.” Kenny stands, walks across the room carefully to avoid the squeakiest floorboards, and peeks out the window to check out the scene.

He’s met with a view of a mass of dark green.

He is even more confused than before. He looks back at his family and nods his head roughly to the left, silently telling them to hide behind the hallway, and they obey quickly. Kenny takes the metal bat he keeps by the door in his hands, shifting it in his grip carefully and weighing its potential fatality, and in a streamlined motion he’s practiced before, he yanks the door open and pulls his bat up behind his head, ready to swing.

“What the-” a familiar voice rasps, and its owner leans backwards, his eyes wide with surprise. “Kenny what the fuck,” he exclaims, and it takes Kenny a moment to take in what he’s seeing.

Craig, his spaceship between two stars, is standing on his doorstep, and in his arms is a big pine tree as tall as he is. Kenny drops his bat down against the wall, and takes a deep breath in through his nose. “You answer first. What’s goin’ on?”

Craig blinks, then shakes the tree a bit to his right. “I said important stuff.” He shrugs, a motion made awkward by his bulky cargo, and Kenny points at it.

“What is that?” he asks, not wanting to get ahead of himself, but he thinks he knows. He has a pretty good idea that he knows.

“The fuck does it look like?” Craig shivers and Kenny realizes he’s left him standing outside inappropriately, and he jumps to the side so Craig has room to enter his humble abode- emphasis on humble. “I got you a tree,” he says as he lugs it in, and with a small grunt of effort, he leans it against the wall beside the door.

Kenny is silent for a moment. “You sure fuckin’ did,” he replies, weakly, because he’s not really sure what else to say. “Where the fuck d’you find a tree on Christmas Eve?”

“Farms sell them till the last minute. I knew you didn’t have one this year. I got a stand and shit too, because, you know.” It’s unspoken that Craig most likely knows that it isn’t just a this-year thing that they don’t have a Christmas tree.

He can’t really help himself; Kenny wastes no time in planting a sloppy kiss on Craig’s lips, not caring that maybe their relationship status isn’t the most defined or that his sister might see. He doesn’t care at all about anyone except the angel gone rigid in front of him who then wraps his arms around his back like he’s hugging him for dear life, like he always does. He feels tears prick at his eyes and tries to blink them away, but he’s not entirely successful. He wants Craig to know how much he loves this moment so he doesn’t try too hard.

Kenny doesn’t say anything at first because there’s not much that he can say to make it better. The silence between them is their usual comfortable normal, the adoration in Kenny’s heart beating so rapidly he’s sure Craig can feel it against his chest. “Thank you,” he finally decides on, whispering it, and Craig hums, the vibration of his Adam’s apple tickling Kenny’s cheek. “Is this real?” he breathes against his collarbone.

“I think so?” Craig replies, but the way it sounds genuinely like a question makes Kenny laugh.

“Craig, I don’t,” he begins, but he truly doesn’t know what to say, and so he says, “I don’t know what to say.”

“Then don’t say anything,” Craig murmurs, and he kisses the shell of his ear, and suddenly Kenny is floating miles above his own body. His soul dances in his chest like a ballerina, jumping and spinning in joyous circles that make him laugh. He must look crazy, doing that, laughing for no outward reason, but he doesn’t care.

“Kenny..?” a timid voice calls, and he remembers he banished the other two-thirds of his family behind the corner of his house for their protection. He leaves Craig’s arms as he turns around and Karen is peeking around the corner, her tiny hands gripping the wall and hair spilling straight down towards the floor.

“You can come out,” he says softly, his smile warm and glowing, “it’s just Craig.”

He can see the sigh of relief in her shoulders before she hops out from the hallway. She catches sight of the tree and gasps. A big smile is slowly growing on her face until it becomes too strong to hide behind her lips and her teeth poke out with glee. Kevin saunters out behind her, but rests his back against the wall, crossing his arms and keeping watchful distance.

Before she can crash into them, Karen screeches to a halt in front of him and Craig. She looks back and forth between the two of them, her eyes crinkled slightly closed from the pure intensity of the blissful grin on her face. “Um,” she begins, suddenly growing shy and clasping her hands in front of her sheepishly, “is that for us?” She looks over at the tree then back at Craig, waiting patiently.

Kenny looks to Craig too, whose expression is essentially unreadable at first but melts into a gentle smile, the kind that makes Kenny melt too. “I had an extra, so.” Karen giggles and Kenny sees Kevin chuckle a bit too before he kicks away from the wall to join the rest of them. “We gonna put this shit in the window or what?”

The rest of their evening is punctuated by happy chattering and giggling while they put together the small string of lights and miscellaneous baubles that Craig has likely stolen off his own Christmas tree for them, and Kenny wishes he could have recorded it. He wishes he could have committed every single second to memory, to savor the glow and genuine joy that pulsed from each of their chests so that every moment felt sweet, soft, and safe. He can, however, memorize the little flashes of things: the way Craig’s eyes get so dark they look black when the room is lit only by Christmas tree lights. The way Kevin smiles when he’s truly, really, happy, with one side of his mouth higher than the other and his tongue stuck between his canines in a smile. How Karen looks at him when no one else is looking, with so much innocent hope in the rosiness of her cheeks that he’s forgotten his worries entirely.

The way his mother looks shocked, confused, then overjoyed when she walks through the door at twelve fifty-three in the morning, officially Christmas Day.

They hold their breath as she steps quietly across the room and looks up at Craig, who struggles to keep eye contact and has to look away after only a few seconds. “Um,” he starts, but she pulls him down into a tight hug, and she starts to cry.

“Thank you,” she says, “oh, thank you for doin’ this for my babies. Thank you so much, Craig. Yer a good kid, you know. Your momma must be proud.” Craig’s cheeks are flushed with embarrassment after that, and Kenny can’t help but giggle at him, his heart in the clouds. “Well come on in now, kids. It’s Christmas, come on!” she insists quietly, her arms opened wide on either side of her, and Kevin, Karen and Kenny pile into them with Craig squished between them all.

She sighs, but it’s happy, and she holds them for a moment longer than usual. “Look, look,” she murmurs, twisting each of her children around by their shoulders- Craig too. “Look at all them pretty lights. You ever seen somethin’ so beautiful in this room?”

Kenny looks up, studies the way the white lights glow against the window and the wall, and he thinks to himself that he has. He’s seen four things so beautiful in this room in fact, and he sees them all around him, and it’s the most beautiful this room’s ever felt for as long as he can remember. Craig’s shoulder is bony against his own, and, remembering his proximity, he twists his hand around his forearm to search for his fingers. They find his and wrap together, warm and clammy, and Kenny breathes out deeply. For a moment, as his lungs empty, so do his troubles.

“Craig,” Kenny mumbles, his eyes struggling to stay open, the streetlight outside the only thing telling him that Craig’s eyes are open too across from him on his mattress.

“Hmm?” he hums, the way he does where his lips buzz and resonate with the vibrations of his heart. Their hands are clasped between them, meeting in the middle between their pillows and bathing in the white light that paints crescents in Craig’s dramatic knuckles.

“I think I love you,” he whispers, letting the smile in his heart overtake his lips, and Craig’s eyes widen before they return to half-lidded. Kenny watches his lips stretch into the widest closed grin he’s ever seen on Craig’s face. He looks so silly, like a caricature of a smitten cartoon.

“Oh yeah?” he questions, and Kenny laughs a bit.

“Yeah,” he says, “I think so.”

“Well,” Craig murmurs, in the deep, raspy voice that he adores that precedes his sleep and preludes his mornings, “I think I love you too.”

He squeezes his fingers in time with his racing pulse and closes his eyes, resting his forehead against the soft, flat back of Craig’s hand. “Thank you,” he whispers, and Craig hums again, and he falls asleep dreaming of the day he isn’t afraid to leave out ‘I think.’

Not yet, but maybe next year.

#craig tucker #kenny mccormick #karen mccormick #kevin mccormick #carol mccormick #crenny #crenny sp #sp crenny #my fanfiction #my fanfic #south park #south park fanfiction #sp fanfiction #sp fanfic #south park fanfic #christmas eve #fluff #secret santa #secret santa gift #gift fic

[at1stsoo]

Recap of last year’s fics

It’s time to reflect on last year, which was my second calendar year for writing but my first full year, so here’s a fic meme rundown on my stories from 2017. (Fic links here will be for AFF, but I’ll link my ao3 account at the end for anyone who prefers that platform.)

Total stories published: *This depends on whether you’re looking on AFF or ao3. It’s 9 on AFF (where Orbiting Bodies is all together), 14 on ao3. And then I did 5 drabbles that were just on Twitter/Tumblr if those count?

Total Word Count: ~125k

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? Definitely more. I had embraced the idea of continuing to write for 2017, but I thought it’d be here and there, not so continuously?

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? All Kaisoo still, but I did write Xiuchen almost as equally in Sometimes, Legends Lie. I actually almost listed them as the primary pairing, haha, just to throw people off my trail in the Mythology fest, but the heart of the story is more Kaisoo (even if Xiuchen got equal ‘screen’ time). I’ve written Chanbaek as a side pairing, but that’s not new.

New genre: I’m out here writing mythology with world building requirements? Soulmate au? Action/Adventure? Basically anything that’s not slice of life, I’m still surprised I did it. What’s your own favorite story of the year? I think… I have to give the nod to Signal Lost (& Found). But I’m really proud of how I ventured out with Campaigning for Your Heart at the start of 2017, so I’ll mention that one, too. Did you take any writing risks this year? Lots? I hadn’t written much humor (a little near the end of Waxing & Waning), so Campaigning was a risk. Uhhhh also all the smut. Which I hadn’t tried wholeheartedly until Campaigning.

Runner up: Of Keepsakes and Kisses, but it got a lot of love during the Best Days of Our Lives fest on LJ. The most fun story to write: What the Nightingale Spies. It ended up being longer in the middle chapters than I’d planned bc I was having fun writing the flirting and the missions. And the reception has been great - I love laughing with you guys in the comments. The story with the single sexiest moment: Ch 12 of Orbiting Bodies (Jongin’s New Favorite Song) - the bathroom scene OR Campaigning for Your Heart - Soo using his fancy tie on Nini The most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: Uh… the epilogue of For Me, You’ll Always Be 18 was written right after New Year’s last year, so… yeah, that. The story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: Signal Lost (& Found). I didn’t know Kyungsoo’s character super well when I first outlined the story, since I was focused on Jongin’s POV and his journey. I kinda kept Nini’s mindset a lot in the beginning of writing that story, to try and capture his fears and doubts faithfully before letting myself 'learn/see’ Kyungsoo more clearly once they were ready to meet. The hardest story to write: What the Nightingale Spies. It was supposed to be my easy going, no stress writing project amid the fests. Ha. HA. But I’m very proud of what I’ve managed to do with it. The biggest disappointment: I don’t know that I have one? Maybe not spending as much time on my Orbiting Bodies chs as I 'should’ sometimes. I prioritize speed to churn those out in the moment when something Kaisoo happens, so I know the quality often isn’t there in the same way as much of my other writing. (But it’s really fun to fangirl with you all right as stuff happens!) The biggest surprise: That I’m even closer with my squad (that I met here on AFF thru reading/writing) than I was last year. That Indi is my fic wife and I get to beta just about everything of hers and she’s there for me, too, whenever I need her? How did I get so LUCKY?!? The most unintentionally telling story: Uh… What the Nightingale Spies is a pretty big ode to Kyungsoo’s voice, which I love. Favorite Opening Line(s): “Ayyyy, who left a sock in the fridge?” Chen whines.

“LEFT a sock in the fridge? Don’t you mean who put a sock in the fridge? Don’t normalize it. Since when is the office refrigerator an appropriate place to store hosiery?” Wendy asks between bites of her muffin. - What the Nightingale Spies

Favorite Closing Line(s): I’m gonna be insufferable here and say I love just about all my closing lines. It’s something I actually spend a fair amount of time on.

Top favorites: Signal Lost (& Found), Sometimes Legends Lie, and Ch 8 of Orb Bodies (The Space Between Right & Wrong). The first two are major spoilers to the fics, so here’s the ending of the OB chapter (Soo’s sad poem in the shape of a broken heart)-

Unhealthy, maybe But I can’t help believe.

In another place, In another time, You’d still Be Mine.

Favorite 5 Lines from Anywhere:

I can’t do this properly bc I hate potentially spoiling anything; here’s a half-assed attempt:

““Why on earth would I miss having my eyes assaulted by routinely bad dye jobs and socialist propaganda?” Kyungsoo retorts while calmly packing up all his things into his Fendi bag, taking longer than normal to gather up his myriad of note-taking materials. Is he lingering? He’s not lingering. Why would he linger.” - Campaigning for Your Heart

“Long ago they might have tried brushing off each other’s compliments with a self-effacing, ‘No I’m not,’ but they’ve grown comfortable over the years in accepting those sincere endearments. The beauty of a love fully bloomed, where fear of seeming immodest or worrying the other is only pandering has long since faded away.” - Of Keepsakes and Kisses

““Settle down, drama llama. Maybe you’re just taking my advice to calm your tits too seriously, and while you would’ve bent over for any dick yesterday, you’re limp for even Gong Yoo today.” - Signal Lost (& Found) [my real fave lines from this fic are in the final scene]

"A thrill runs through Kai’s body. “Oh. Well that’s, um, that’s good,” he says tentatively, not wanting the eagerness to burst out like a fucking Bat-Signal in the night sky.” - What the Nightingale Spies

“I’ve choked guys out with my thighs before.” Great, that’s an image Jongin will never get out of his head. Might as well chisel it on his bedroom ceiling - it’s all he’s going to see when he tries to sleep tonight, he just knows it. - What the Nightingale Spies

Top 5 Scenes from Anywhere You Would Choose to Have Illustrated: 1. Jongin standing in the art gallery in Signal Lost (& Found)

2. The moment Kaisoo meet in What the Nightingale Spies

3. Kyungsoo and Jongdae’s conversation in Tartarus in Sometimes, Legends Lie

4. The pamphlets falling around Kaisoo when they kiss in Campaigning for Your Heart

5. Kaisoo standing together, holding hands and watching the sunset on the back of Soo’s yacht in Sail Away With Me Fic-writing goals for 2018:

Hmmm, trying a new genre like either fantasy/mama AU or wolf AU. Finishing the epilogues I promised for my fest fics.

Thank yous:

To everyone who’s become a friend, a reader, or a commenter. You guys are awesome and a MAJOR reason why I’m still writing and writing a lot. my ao3 account with works sorted by popularity in case you want to check out any of the ones I mentioned in this recap.

#kaisoo #kadi #kaisoo fanfic #writing #fanfic

[canaryatlaw]

okay, today was WILD. Idk how much energy I have to write it all out but there’s a lot of it. I’d set my alarm for 8 because I wanted to bug ticketmaster ASAP about getting the stupid code, and I honestly don’t even remember how that situation ended because we just ended up using the code they’d told us was the “generic” code. Friend arrived and we ate the brunch food I’d ordered while waiting for things to happen. at 9 am our time the NY tickets went on sale since that was their 10 am so we could see how the process went and it was pretty simple, it wanted the code but wasn’t didn’t require an email address or anything for it to be pre-sale, so we were just put in the queue and got in after a few minutes. so we had least had a better idea of what we were doing at that point. so we made sure we were in the waiting room for Chi and mostly just waited, lol. We had my laptop, friend’s laptop, and the crappy chromebook I have, I didn’t think it would let me run more than one account at a time because last time they’d only let you do one on the same phone number, but apparently that wasn’t an issue this time. so we get into the queue and I think it was my chromebook that got the best place in line and we were in in about 30 seconds after it went live. there were two seats in pit left when we opened it, but I knew before we could get to them someone else would take them, and they disappeared like 2 seconds later, so that was frustrating to know even when I knew we couldn’t get them. so we ended up four rows back from the pit, row DD where the pit was AAA-DDD and then our section was AA down to us at DD. so they were still very good seats and we were pleased with that. then of course we checked the NY seats just to, you know, see, and neither friend nor I have any impulse control, and they had very few very good seats left, and I was too goddamn tempted so now we have NY tickets too lol. so with that we declared victory and moved onto the next part of the day, which was a trip to Target. we went to the one pretty close to us that friend usually goes to but I don’t because there really isn’t any viable public transportation routes to get there. so we went around and grabbed different things, like cat food and some random food items. when we were almost done, I got a message on my phone and then realized HOOOOOOOOHHH BOY, I FUCKED UP. basically I was supposed to be in court this morning but I was an idiot and never added it to the calendar or spreadsheet, so I didn’t know it was today. and I mean, I knew it was a fixable situation because this has happened to pretty much everyone at some point, plus like, we don’t like get in trouble at work?? like it’s just not a thing lol so I wasn’t that concerned. so I looked at some stuff on my phone while we checked out of Target and then headed to the Taco Bell we’d been wanting for like, over a week now haha, they no longer had the chalupa box option I had been getting but they had their new “grilled cheese burrito” with a box so I got that instead. it was pretty good, though I have no idea how it was supposed to be related to grilled cheese because it was pretty much just a cheesy burrito. Once we ate our food in the car, we tried to go to a bank and get quarters, but the line was like super long so we decided it wasn’t worth it, so after that friend dropped me at home. while I was trying to walk up to the stairs to my apartment with my bags I had like a really bad tremor in my legs like the ones that have been happening lately and I fell forward onto the stairs, I didn’t get hurt or anything but it was really scary, and once I got up I almost fell like 3 more times so I’m like jesus fuck. then I remembered when I was talking to my new primary care doctor she had told me to look out for this potential side effect from one of the meds I’m on, and I hadn’t put it together up to this point because that side effect was more described as like, twitching instead of tremors, but the ones that have been very bad and only started recently are definitely somewhat closer to that. so I called my doctors office thinking she had just said that I should just stop taking the med and I’d be fine, and just wanted to confirm that. they took my info and she would get back to me as soon as she can. so I then spent the next like 4 hours trying to get any information about the court case that went up today because we can’t put any effort into fixing it when we don’t actually know what the situation was. I called like, everybody I could think of and like got sent in so many loops because apparently everyone is so fucking incompetent!! and like when I thought I got to the people who would actually know the answers their phones either went to voicemail or would just ring endlessly before dropping the call, and I called over and over again and left two voicemails. the main issue I think was that the courtroom coordinator for the courtroom it was up in was not there that day, but they said they would get me to talk with the clerk of the courtroom, but that never happened. so like, I’m fairly irritated with all of this. somewhere in the mix of all this I received the call back from my doctor, and oh hey she hadn’t said just stop the medication if the side effect appears, she said go to the ER to make sure it’s not a more serious side effect that could start like this and could be like, irreversible if not treated, and she was like very firm about me needing to go. and I’m really frustrated about it because I really don’t want to do that and I knew that it was very likely it would turn out to be nothing, but after some debating and seeing just how bad things were today I decided to go, once I finished work haha because she did say it wasn’t like an /urgent/ urgent matter because I’m clearly sitting there being fine. so I finished it all up and then packed a bag with some of my meds and some snacks, then ubered to the ER. it would’ve been nice to have someone with me so I didn’t have to go by myself, but because of everything they’re still doing the policy where they’re only allowing patients in, not anybody else with them, even when the covid cases were being dealt with an entirely different section of the med complex, but hey you know how things are right now. so I got there and checked in, they took some vitals and then not long afterwards took me to a room to wait for nurse and/or doctor. so I waited, wasn’t too long, maybe about 25 minutes but like I had my phone so I didn’t care lol. once they got in there they like evaluated the tremors and did some bloodwork, and ultimately concluded it at least was very unlikely it was the serious side effect, and that if I stop the medication that should help things significantly. this whole thing is the fault of my dickhead old psychiatrist who put me on this med to begin with. he only put me on it for sleep purposes which is an off label use for it when it’s actually like, an antipsychotic med which I obviously didn’t need because I’m pretty stable at this point. at first it worked for sleep, but then kind of stopped really working, so I was already planning on changing it when I have my psychiatrist appointment next week, so I guess now I’ll just be stopping a bit earlier. they said to take benadryl for both it’s sleep-inducing effects and that it can actually be a way to treat tremors too, so that would be good. I got discharged not long after, I walked a bit away from the ER entrance before getting an uber because I didn’t want to totally freak the driving out picking me up from the ER. but that ended up fine and this driver was like going all out for that 5 star rating haha offering my a phone cable, to turn on the AC or not and what to have on the radio haha and he was nice and funny to talk to in our fairly short ride home, so that was good at least. when I got home I did some stuff only my computer for a bit, I don’t remember what at this point, but eventually I turned on The Goldbergs while doing computer stuff and then after a bit watched some kpop videos that I hadn’t seen yet so I was glad to see those. and yeah, shortly after finishing up with them I showered and started getting ready for bed and now I’m here. I guess I managed to get most of my crazy day out there because this post is hella long haha but I mean that’s just because a lot went on. hopefully tomorrow will be less eventful, I don’t have court or standby on the hotline but I need to figure out what’s happening with the case from today, so idk how much time that will take up, but now it’s 1:30 am and I really need some sleep, so I’ll end this here. Goodnight babes. Hope you have a great Wednesday.

#daily journal #July 2020