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#i know some of you have probably already been tagged but if you haven't done it yet then it still counts
anakinfallen · 8 months
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top 9 books
tagged by @gayarthur
(not in any order)
1. in memoriam by alice winn
as soon as i started reading this book i knew i wanted to reread with a pen. queer book set during ww1
2. blue lily, lily blue by maggie stiefvater
this book (and trc in general) had me in a chokehold when i read it in high school, not plot just vibes, the levels of mutual pining had me going insane
3. if we were villains by m l rio
i started this intending to only read about half go to bed and then finish it the next day because i’d already read one book that day and i finished it that night. another book i need to revisit with a pen. it has it all: murder, shakespeare
4. a man called ove by fredrik backman
this book is translated from swedish. the last book i read last year and the end had me sobbing. grumpy old man (who reminded me of my granddad) developing meaningful connections with his neighbours
5. the hunger games by suzanne collins
it feels like such a basic answer but this was one of the first books i ever sat down and read in one day. i borrowed it from the school library that morning and started it when our teacher gave us “free time” during our social science class and finished it at 1am. also when i was first on tumblr i was a hunger games blog (not this tumblr but my old one rip)
6. the poppy war trilogy by r f kuang (i know i cheated by including the entire trilogy but i don't care)
just this entire trilogy is so good (definitely check trigger warnings before reading though). i was originally intrigued by this series because it was described as “what if azula was the avatar” but it is so much more than that. explores the effects of war and colonialism
7. weather girl by rachel lynn solomon
one of my favourite romance books, two people who work for the same news channel work together to gets their divorced bosses back together (i just really love this trope, see: one of my favourite romcoms is set it up). touches on mental health issues.
8. six of crows by leigh bardugo
another super basic answer but i also hate that this book is considered a "booktok book" when it was originally a "tumblr book" but i loved all the crows (and also the pining between kaz and inej). just ✨fantasy heist✨
9. vicious by v e schwab
i have always been a big reader but this book got me seriously back into reading after i graduated uni and started working full time. the relationship between victor and eli is just so good and toxic and fascinating. i just love the way v e schwab writes
special mention to summer sons by lee mandelo because it was so so so good
and also the bumper book of peanuts comics because i love flicking through it when i need a pick me up
this list was genuinely so hard for me because i read so many books and then forget about them except for the feeling it left me
it also started with me trying to give short descriptions as to why i liked the books and ended in word vomit
also going to plug my storygraph (and if you see i'm 50 books behind on my goal no you didn't)
tagging @shitouttabuck @fatedking @disasterbuckdiaz @enchantingverse @uelut-erinaceus @killianjonesz
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annie-thyme · 4 days
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and once again I am suddenly overwhelmed with an intense feeling of not really fitting into a gender
#honestly I don't even know what this is about I just saw some stories on insta and it's like oh look#she is so proud to be a woman whoa ppl...actually do that huh#and I just realised I never really felt that way like. not fully!! maybe a bit of that yeah but not to this full extent of this#womanhood thing#and I mean yeah I probably felt more of it in my teens and like 20s but it only just occurred to me that it's never been to this full extent#of being womanly and motherly and nurturing etc etc#and now I do not feel like that art all I mean I mostly am a creachur. a divine being. if you will. a freak#and I love it tomorrow I'm gonna go try on some skirts which I haven't done in ages and I'm definitely gonna be doing it in a queer way#not in a girl way#anyway#I know this is really weird going on tag rants here where nobody except a few of my mutuals (hey guys love you lots thought u should know)#is gonna see let alone read this but I really don't have anyone irl to talk to abt gender stuff and I mean I tried?#but just idk. ppl don't get it? like everyone in my life already knows I'm queer and they sorta hand wave it away like that is too#complicated and not that important - and it isn't!! but it also is!#I think they might have been more understanding and sympathetic if I were trans but I'm not and being nonbinary is somehow too difficult for#them to grasp idk#and when I say I don't want to be a different gender and feel increasingly outside and to the left of my assigned gender the more I think#about it they just. do not get it. and it is kinda discouraging and leaves me feeling like not talking about it with them ever#I don't know why I'm writing all this tbh#gender#queer things
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So this is a weird ask but I figured an Actual Welsh Person would be the person to go to, and you've been pretty gung-ho about the language thing. So I hope I'm not bothering you with this.
Is there a cultural consensus on foreigners learning Welsh? I'm American and I don't have a single shred of Welsh ancestry. My family is historically German, and we've been here since the English Colony days, so it honestly seems really weird even to try to claim some tie to German heritage.
Anyway, my point is, I have absolutely zero legitimate claim to the Welsh language. I don't plan to travel to Wales in the foreseeable future. I have no reason to learn Welsh except that it sounds pretty and I enjoy a challenge.
Putting aside the issue of "lmao it's gonna be stupid difficult to learn an endangered language if you don't have anyone to speak it with" (I have a loose plan for dealing with that, and the experience of learning two languages to "can read most novels without needing the dictionary" level without anyone to speak them with in person already) entirely, do you reckon it's okay for me to study Welsh? I know Americans are really, really bad about just kinda assuming the whole world belongs to us, and I'm trying not to do that here. Especially because Welsh IS endangered.
I imagine your average Welsh person probably doesn't care what some random American does. But like, for people who care about the language...Would it be considered disrespectful or overstepping for me to study it? I don't expect you to speak for the entire country, of course, but I respect your opinion and I feel like you'd have a grasp on what the general feeling towards a foreigner like me might be.
Thanks for your time.
I honestly, truly, do not understand how the discussion around cultural appropriation has been twisted in the cultural zeitgeist to such an extent that people now feel anxiety about learning other languages.
This is not a personal attack on you, Anon - the gods only know that you clearly care and want to do the right thing, and that's beautiful and wonderful and also I will come back to extolling your personal virtues at the end of this post, so stay tuned. But I do want to take a moment here to talk about the broader issue at play, which I have seen echoed multiple times elsewhere, because fuck me what are we doing to ourselves.
Learn. Languages.
That is what languages are for! To be used for communication. If you don't learn languages, you are forcing everyone else to use yours. How have we somehow, as a culture, twisted that into being the less selfish option? How have we done that? I posted my favourite Welsh idiom recently, and someone reblogged it and wrote in the tags that they loved the idiom and would start using it, but they would do so in English because their "Welsh pronunciation would make their Welsh grandmother spin in her grave."
What kind of mental gymnastics is that?
How the fuck do you twist it so badly that you think taking a Welsh idiom for your own and exclusively using it in English is less offensive than saying it in Welsh but maybe a bit wrong? I've literally had people proclaim to me that they're learning Welsh on Duolingo but they never speak it because they're too self-conscious, and they tell me this not to highlight a massive flaw in themselves that they need to work on, but as though I'm supposed to pat them on the head and thank them for... still making me speak English to them.
There was that post where a Deaf blogger received an anonymous ask saying learning sign language is cultural appropriation, as though Deaf people haven't been calling for Sign to be taught in schools. As though a Deaf person being entirely isolated in everyday hearing society unless they have an interpreter with them is less offensive than a hearing person being able to use BSL.
Like, these are not sacred or religious languages. The purpose of Welsh or BSL or what have you is not to perform the Eleusinian mysteries. It's a living everyday language, same as English -
Except it's not the same as English. As Anon here so rightly points out, Welsh is endangered. That means we are desperate for people to learn it. That's how it will survive. That's how we reversed it from 'dying language' to 'living language', in fact - we managed to get lots of people to learn it. You know what is a threat, though? People not learning it because, like poor Anon here, they've been somehow convinced by Western society that you're only allowed to learn languages if you personally have a historic or cultural connection to them that you can prove via six forms of ID and a letter of recommendation from a druid. Or people never using it because they're too embarrassed to try and risk losing face by getting it wrong, or maybe sounding a bit silly, and thus forcing us to use English anyway. Those are threats.
Anon. Listen to me, feel the sincerity of my words: we adore you. We adore you. You cannot imagine how appreciated it is when someone learns Welsh. You cannot imagine how touched we are that you wanted to, that you tried, that you respected us enough and considered us valid enough that you made the effort. Our closest neighbours are the very people who are still trying to stamp out Welsh to this very day. Do you know the number 1 reaction I get, by a country mile, when I tell English people that I speak Welsh? It's some variant on a scoff, and the sentiment "Why? What's the point? Bit useless, isn't it?"
By a country mile. That's the reaction I expect, and brace for, and is overwhelmingly what I get.
So when someone who isn't Welsh actually chooses to learn Welsh?
Imagine what that feels like! To go from not-even-hidden disgust, from outright mockery and often active suppression campaigns, to a foreigner earnestly telling me that they love and respect my language so much they're trying to learn it. Imagine how that feels.
Please learn Welsh. Please learn it. We will love you for it. We will build you a statue. We will bake little Welshcakes with your face on in icing sugar. We will write you poems in complex rhyme. We'll name an Eisteddfod prize after you. We'll name at least, like, three sheep after you. Thank you, thank you so much for even wanting to learn. You're a delight and a marvel and a wonder. Your hair looks great today, as it does all days. You're a strong, independent human being of immense wisdom and compassion. If this were a Welsh myth you'd be a wise salmon the heroes came to for advice. What a fantastic human.
The welcome awaits if you choose to learn
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matrixbearer2024 · 3 months
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Roller Rinking, Dancing and Dreaming
Vox x CollegeStudent!Reader
A/N: I went roller skating with some friends and one of them pitched the idea of a date at the roller rink with Vox and Reader, though it's not really a date anymore for those two since the Hazbin Hotel crew tagged along because Charlie didnt realize that this was supposed to be a special occasion. Oh and Alastor is just going to be kind of a sore thumb because it's funny. Also found this pic of Vox(it's not my art and I don't know who drew it HELP-) but it's his getup for his and Reader's date because I will not have this flatscreen idiot take us out in his fucking work clothes. Velvette give this man a proper wardrobe PLEASE-
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A/N: I'm probably going to write a lot of date ideas between Vox and (Y/N) to prolong the slow-burn and also so I can include the other characters anyway- so if you guys have any other ideas- go ahead and drop them down below and I'll try to fit the ones I think would work best! As always, happy reading and I hope you guys enjoy!
A/N: Final note- but this was the song I was listening to while writing this long LONG chapter so if you guys wanna vibe to it while reading go ahead lolol- Song's called: "Shut Up And Dance" by Walk The Moon.
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If there was one word Vox would use to describe you, it had to be crazy.
Or cute, but that was besides the point-
He'd always thought your ideas couldn't get any wilder, only to be proven wrong in at the very least a few hours.
Especially when he was reminded of the time you made a papercraft of his clothes while he was stuck to your TV screen.
And the time you sent him earrape audio during a meeting for no reason?
And calling coffee "Bean Juice"?
He could go on and on about the random insane things you would do periodically.
But because he grew so used to it-
More like he always ended up looking forward to your entertaining shenanigans-
The first thing Vox had done was give you a new VoxTech phone with your custom app on it.
At this point, he defaulted to using it if he were to check on you anyway and you had no complaints.
Alastor gave you both shit for bringing tech into the hotel only to get flipped off by the two of you anyway.
Lucifer had to stop himself from laughing because the deer was practically throwing a tantrum at being so nonchalantly brushed off-
Vox chuckled as he reminisced about it.
That was all few days ago, and it seems like you've settled into hell quite nicely.
You made friends with nearly everyone at the hotel, save a certain radio cannibal who you also liked to annoy-
And you'd even met Velvette on one occasion.
Well, more like Vox wanted to fashion you a wardrobe but didn't trust himself to pick good outfit combinations so he just entrusted the task to his fashionista colleague-
What he didn't expect was for the both of you to hit it off fairly quickly after that and ended up staying in touch online.
Vox even wondered at times if you were talking to Velvette more than him already but didn't think about it too much-
You haven't been to the Vee tower since that outfit shopping spree and well, you kind of understood why.
Especially after what you heard about Valentino from both Vox and Angel Dust.
That pimp guy was just someone you did not want to be around.
So that just left your TV headed buddy with no choice but to visit the hotel more and more.
Not that either of you cared much about how irked Alastor got because both of you and sometimes even Lucifer would often gang up on him-
Vox never really stayed, after all redemption didn't seem to be his thing with a whole media empire to run-
But sometimes you would force him to humor Charlie and try some of the activities, teasing him about it and saying he was cringe whenever he got awkward.
Vox just chuckled as he looked back on a lot of the moments you both had together, twirling a pen in his hand while he fondly remembered.
Of course until he eventually forced himself to stop daydreaming and focus back on the stack of paperwork in front of him.
He hadn't even really begun and honestly he didn't know if he wanted to.
It was busy days like these where he couldn't wait to visit and see you, work was stressful enough so just hanging around you and turning his brain off to your nonsense was enough of a distraction.
Ah whatever, that was enough of procrastinating.
It was a little while of him working on and checking the stack of documents on his table before his phone rang.
Vox didn't even bother to check the caller ID and just answered it because he was in work-mode.
So he almost ended up snapping his pen in two from sheer surprise when he heard your voice through the call.
"Heeeeey Vox? You free this weekend?"
The overlord just glanced over at his schedule and figured he could clear up a day or two.
It was only a day until the weekend after all.
He'd have to work double-time until then just to make up for the load but he didn't see a problem with it when the trade-off was spending more time with you.
"I could free up my schedule, why? Did you have something planned dollface?"
"Kinda, I heard there's a new roller rink disco club around the block and I wanted to go!"
"And you're telling me this, why?"
"Because I want you to go with me, duhhhh!"
Vox looked over some of the papers he had on his table absentmindedly and hummed.
Admittedly, you asking him about it first was kind of flattering- even if you knew he was a very busy guy.
He would often drop whatever he was doing just to help you if you needed it after all, so him rearranging his schedule on the fly like this wasn't anything new.
"So kind of like a date?"
He grinned when he heard you stutter and fumble over your words.
The overlord could only imagine just how red and flustered you were at the moment.
You'd always found ways to embarrass him back then when you were alive, so now he was just kindly returning the favor.
"N-no! Well- kind of? I don't know! Just wear something nice!"
"Sure doll, I guess I'll see you then?"
"Mhm, see you!"
Vox stared fondly at his phone when you ended the call, a smile working onto his face as he chuckled.
Who knew it was because of this specific little gadget that brought you guys together in the first place.
Putting the phone down, he cracked his knuckles and gave his table a once over.
It was covered in papers of all kinds but if he started now he could probably get it finished before tomorrow.
You threw your phone onto a nearby cushion and covered your face with your hands.
That stupid TV was too charming for his own good-
You grumbled slightly and crossed your arms, sometimes you doubted if Vox really even meant all the words he says-
Did it come so naturally to him to just be that charismatic?
But at the same time the guy could be a real annoying piece of work-
You really felt like just another sucker who couldn't decide whether you wanted to hug the overlord or strangle him.
"Heya toots! What's got you so worked up?"
"Hey Angel, just- dealing with Vox I guess?"
"Seriously? That's what you're all hung up about?"
"Hey! I'm not- hung up about it-! He's just so annoying."
"For once we can agree on something it seems!"
You screamed when Alastor suddenly appeared at your side, falling off the area of the couch where you were sitting.
If there was one thing you hated that the two media broadcast overlords had in common was that they loved loved LOVED to just sneak up on you.
It was getting really old and really tiring.
Frankly you had already been sick of Vox being a cheeky little shit doing it- you didn't need his rival to join in-
"Nobody asked for your opinion Al, and don't you have some murder to orchestrate or something?"
"HaHA! Not at the moment! Why, if you wanted to join me on my excursions you could've said so my dear!"
"Eugh- hard pass old geezer. Besides, I'll be busy this weekend."
"Really? With what?"
"Gonna go to that new roller rink disco club down the block. I used to go roller skating when I was a kid but eventually stopped as I grew older."
You figured it would be wise to leave out the fact you were going with Vox, you didn't need to arm Alastor any more ammunition to mess with you or his rival.
Thing is, you didn't necessarily notice just what chaos sharing your weekend plans would entail.
"Well if you're already going there, why not take the others with you?"
Oh fuck.
You forgot about Charlie.
Now you really wished you had kept your mouth shut, the last thing you wanted to do was hurt her feelings when she'd been nothing but nice to you.
"Okay hold on-"
Alastor couldn't help widening his grin when he saw your worried expression, well this was certainly going to get interesting.
"What a wonderful idea my dear! Perhaps I should go observe what this brand new establishment has to offer as well!"
"You antique motherfucker-"
Your fluffy deer ears pinned back as you glared at the radio demon, he really had to be toying with you when he said that.
Especially if what Husk had said in the past was anything to go by.
Alastor didn't like going to clubs or places that were similarly just as noisy and obnoxious.
So he was really just trying to shove you deeper into the grave you'd dug yourself.
"That's great Al! Maybe you could even find some more ideas for the hotel while you're there!"
You just covered your face in your hands, so much for just spending time with just Vox this weekend-!
How the hell were you even supposed to tell him about this??
"Yeaaaahhh... greaaaat..."
You weakly mumbled, tiredly looking up at Angel who just gave you an apologetic shrug.
You just gave up trying to mention otherwise when everyone else seemed more than eager for this weekend.
So much for your original plan.
By the time the weekend rolled around, you got yourself all dressed pretty with a casual top and jeans.
You decided against wearing anything that would leave your legs exposed since you didn't know if you'd fall down a bunch while rollerskating.
It was a while since you could remember the last time you tried.
Grabbing your phone and some necessities, you left your room and went to wait in the hotel lobby for the others to get ready.
"Vox where are you going?"
The overlord nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a familiar voice from behind him.
He swiveled around to see the youngest Vee just deadpanning at him.
Geez, and he thought he was being sneaky too.
"Ah! Velvette! Just- heading out. No reason."
"It's your date with (Y/N) isn't it?"
"It's not- oh whatever, what do you want?"
His colleague gave him an annoyed once over and the tech overlord just raised an eyebrow at her.
What was she planning this time?
"You aren't leaving wearing that."
"My suit? What's wrong with it?"
"For the occasion? Everything. Now come on- let's see if I can put something together for you."
While Vox didn't question what his colleague meant, he just followed Velvette to her studio when she gestured for him to.
He initially wanted to wear something other than his work clothes but after looking at the options in his closet he immediately went against the idea.
The last thing he wanted to do was embarrass you by arriving underdressed.
"Nope. Too formal. Too risqué. Too boring. Too colorful- Aha! There! How's that?"
Looking at himself in a nearby mirror, Vox straightened the blazer he wore with a smile.
A light blue turtleneck with some loose slacks and a dark blazer on top, plus a pair of sneakers in his colors to throw together the whole ensemble.
He didn't have his hat this time, but he figured it was probably for the better that he didn't.
Comfortable but still dapper, he liked it.
"Your outfits are impeccable as always Velvette."
"Yeah yeah, you owe me one for this Vox. Now get going or you'll be late!"
The overlord didn't bother to ask his colleague about how she knew about his plans- you could've told her about it online for all he knew.
Instead, Vox just waved back at his colleague as he walked out the entrance of the building feeling excited to see you again.
So you could imagine his irritation when he met you at the club and saw everyone from the hotel there as well.
So much for it being a date-
"What the fuck are they doing here?"
He angrily whispered to you while the others were busy exploring the new building.
Pop music blared over the speakers as the lights flashed around.
A bunch of sinners were skating around the large rink that probably took up more than half of the whole club, some were just dancing around the sides outside of the rink.
It was exactly like an old disco club with the bar and even the older style furniture and aesthetic.
"Charlie suggested everyone come along and Alastor insisted, it wasn't like I had a choice."
You grit out in reply, crossing your arms and feeling slightly just as grumpy about the situation as your flatscreen companion.
"Whatever, we can still enjoy ourselves can't we?"
Admittedly, Vox looked pretty good in this new outfit.
You hadn't seen him in anything but his trademark blue coat and red vest he wore for work so this was something new.
And it was a good new, you'd thank Velvette later.
The overlord just smiled at you and nodded, leaving the others in the group to just explore as you both went and bought some skates for the rink.
More like Vox just didn't want to use the rental ones so he bought you each a pair to keep-
"(Favorite color)? You shouldn't have."
"Figured if I was getting something, might as well get the one you'd prefer."
Your giggle was nearly drowned out by the loud music but Vox still heard it, a soft smile forming on his face as he watched you eagerly put on your new skates.
"Honestly didn't think you'd remember about it, I think I only mentioned it once."
"Kind of hard to forget things when you've got a computer for a brain dollface."
You just lightly bumped his shoulder in jest before standing up and twirling on your new wheels.
Thankfully you could still remember how to work them, even if it was a long time ago since you'd done this kind of thing.
"Do they fit okay?"
"Pretty well actually, how'd you know my size?"
"Just guessed, I might be lucky today."
You just playfully rolled your eyes at his response, of course he'd pat himself on the back for that.
It didn't take long for Vox to eventually wear his own set of skates, he just had no idea how to stand.
"Come on! It's not that hard, I'll teach you!"
The overlord stared at your outstretched hands for a moment before taking them and standing up.
Again with the fuzzy feeling in his chest- what the hell-
The both of you wobbled for a second while your companion got used to the new center of gravity.
"Would you believe it if I said I have never ever done this before?"
"I think it kinda shows ya goof."
You continued to hold his hand as you showed Vox how to move forward, unfortunately for you- his sense of balance wasn't quite that great and you both ended up crashing to the floor.
The overlord landing on his ass and you landing on top of him.
The both of you exchanged a look before bursting into laughter.
You were slightly thankful for the strobing lights of the club, otherwise you were pretty sure Vox would've easily seen the blush on your face.
He was kind of cute when he seemed to just be enjoying himself...
You just shoved that thought to the back of your mind and stood up again, holding a hand out for your companion to take.
"You're not gonna learn if you just sit down like that ya know? Come on! I wanna get inside the rink!"
Vox just looked at you amused, taking your hand and hefting himself to his feet again.
He could practically feel the energy just radiating off you, the bright excitement in your eyes even as you lead him to the entrance of the rink with much less struggle this time around.
You were just adorable, you'd let go of his hand to twirl around the center of the roller rink to the beat of the music.
Vox just found himself smiling again as he approached you.
If being beside you meant he could watch and see you like this?
He would gladly take that position in a heartbeat.
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y-rhywbeth2 · 5 months
Note
In your post about Durge's sudden normality you mentioned implied SA in the tags; would you mind elaborating on that? I don't remember seeing any implications like that, but I know I missed a lot of details in my first run. (Obviously if you would mind feel free to ignore this.)
Naturally this is going under a cut for discussion of rape, sexual exploitation and incest:
Some of it is mostly me reading into things and frowning, but Bhaal being able to violate Durge sexually and the intent of sexual exploitation (regardless of Durge's will) is canon and it does lend credence to the idea.
Durge is obligated to breed, and Bhaal can and will force them to; the original version of the feral ending in the dialogue files involves him forcing them into a state of sexual hyperarousal and forcing them to mate with a gnoll, in the same way he can force the urge to slay on them. Bhaal's intention there is to see if he can breed more monstrous Bhaalspawn. Some of the dialogue options are just Durge screaming in horror.
Durge has no memory of the actual rape; Bhaal forces them to spend the entire time thinking about him: "Your memory of last night's act is absent. In the moment of mounting, your mind emptied itself, and you could think only of Bhaal."
And knowing that, when I saw "I love you father. I'm a good [child], a good, good [child]" in the released version I had to go sit down for a bit.
We know that Durge is expected to have kids - it's a mortal sin that they haven't. It's also vague whether they tried or not pre-amnesia; they're described as "failing" not refusing, it could've gone either way. Durge may already have been exploited. Even if they don't disappoint Bhaal in game, this "duty" remains. It's not just the Tribunal making shit up; Sceleritas is your direct liaison to Bhaal, and he makes this clear to them as Bhaal's Chosen too.
We know that if Durge won't kill then Bhaal will force them to, and we know that he can force them to have sex too. It's entirely possible that Durge's only say in this is to either fuck partners they chose or have them chosen for them (as we all know, Bhaal has zero respect for his kids' bodily autonomy or desires past his use for them, and Bhaal wants more babies.)
At the very least, it doesn't seem to be a major part of Bhaal's plan for Durge yet, so Durge may have dodged this specific form of abuse for now.
Bhaal has also done this to Sarevok, it seems, who would probably have killed himself back in BG1+2 if he could see what would happen to him in his future.
Knowing that Bhaal has no issues inflicting sexual arousal on his own kids, those scriptures you find that explicitly refer to the pleasure he bestows on his followers when they kill as "erotic" unfortunately have little reason not to be applied to Bhaalspawn. It would also explain the necrophilia if Durge has been conditioned to see killing/corpses as sexual.
Not quite the same thing, but the thing where people think Durge fucked the Netherbrain is actually from a remark by Bhaal in the journal update, where he makes a crack that "That slimy thing in the Moonrise called you its fallen star. It was very reverent [...] apparently [you're] good at playing with tentacles."
That's not inherently sexual, but knowing that Bhaal is willing to sexually exploit Durge and that the fandom had already interpreted it as sexual, I did kind of stare at it in horror for a bit.
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agust28 · 4 months
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Doubts
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pairing leehan x reader WC 1918 Tags angst and fluff. everybody lived happily ever after no worries. such a drama queen (just like me 😭🙏) Notes can you tell i gave up at the end? i haven't slept in over 24 hours :D i feel like a zombie also i still haven't figured out the request button ugh MISTAKES EVERYWHERE SORRY
It was a cold and windy night as you sat on the bottom of the slide. The reason for you being out in such temperature with only a light sweatshirt and sweat was due to a huge fight with your boyfriend, Leehan. You two had been planning a small, simple date to catch up since there hadn’t been much communication between the two of you due to hectic schedules. You reminded him multiple times throughout the week, and each time he would reply, saying, 'I know, don't worry.' It wasn't easy to take time off from your job, especially during the weekend, so it was valid for you to be worried about making sure you both were on the same page.
Then comes the day of the date. You had woken up early, anticipating a message from Leehan, but no luck. You brushed it off, thinking he was just sleeping in. Two hours passed, and still nothing from him. It was nearing the time of your date, and you were already at the cafe you both decided to meet up at. You were starting to feel anxious, worrying if something had happened to him, and he wasn't just ditching you because he forgot. You sent numerous text messages asking where he was, hoping he'd reply. You gave up and decided to call him instead.
Your worry seemed to grow each time you got sent to voicemail and resorted to calling one of his members, hoping they had an answer about his whereabouts. You stumbled upon Sungho's contact first and waited for him to answer.
“Hello?” he's confused as to why you're calling since it's a rare occurrence.
“Sungho! I keep trying to reach Leehan, but he's not answering! Are you with him?”
“Uh, yeah, he's down in the cafeteria.” He's confused as to why you sound so worried and why Leehan hasn't responded to you. Your heart immediately plummets. He actually forgot your date.
“Y/n? You there?” Sungho's question brings you back to reality.
“Do you want me to get Leehan-” you cut him off. “No, it's alright!”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, um, can you not mention any of this to Leehan? Please.” He ponders about whether or not he should obey your request or inform his friend.
“Please, Sungho? It's nothing to worry about; I was just a bit anxious.” Sungho sighs. “…Okay, I won't, but promise to fix whatever's going on between you two?” You let out a sigh of relief. “I will, don't worry.” You exchange goodbyes before hanging up. You stand outside the cafe just a little longer, thinking maybe this was all just some silly prank and your boyfriend is actually on his way. But you knew it wasn't, so you head home.
It's a few hours after the date gone wrong when Leehan shows up at your place. He enters your apartment thanks to the spare key you gave him a while back. He searches the living room looking for you to be lounging on the sofa or reading a book, but you're nowhere to be found. Leehan calls out for you, thinking you're probably in bed since it was late. And he was right because he enters your room and sees you cozied up under the sheets with your phone in hand.
“There you are! I called out for you.” You simply glance and go back to scrolling on TikTok, scoffing under your breath. You can't believe he had the audacity to come over after ditching you and ignoring all your attempts to contact him.
“Hello? Are you ignoring me?” he teases as he waves his hands trying to get your attention.
“What?” you ask aggravated, watching him laugh. As if there was anything to laugh about right now! His smile is immediately replaced with a frown. “Did I do something wrong?” his brows furrowed, trying to think what he could have done.
“Do you seriously not remember?” Your emotions are hitting all at once, and before you know it, there are tears running down your face. “I can't believe it,” you mutter and push past him. “What? Why are you crying? What's wrong?” he's panicking, trying to figure out what he's done to make you cry.
Before you can make it to the front door, he catches your wrist, and his heart clenches at the sight of your tears. You attempt to look down and rid your tears, but it's no use. “Our date? The one we've been planning for a whole week? The one I kept reminding you about!” you burst out in anger and sadness. His eyes immediately widen in realization.
“I can't believe you forgot! I tried calling you and texting you! You never answered! I was so worried something had happened, so I called Sungho just so he could tell me you were with him the entire time!” Sungho talked to you? And didn't even tell him?
“Do you know how embarrassing it was for people to come up and ask for a chair, and for me to say, ‘No sorry, it's for my boyfriend,’ just for my boyfriend not to show up!” he's trying to process everything and get some words out, but you immediately snatch your wrist back and try to make a run, but he throws himself between you and the door.
“Wait! Please let me explain!”
“No! Move!” you try shoving him, but no success. “I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, please just wait!” You let out a frustrated cry, attempting one more time to shove him before giving up and turning your back to him. While you have your back turned, Leehan pulls out his phone with shaking hands, wondering why he wasn't aware of your calls. The blood drains from his face when he realizes his phone had been on DND. He turns it off, and instantly, all your notifications appear on his screen. He understands now why he didn't receive a good morning text like normal. He brushed it off, thinking you had a busy schedule and eventually forgot all about you. Instead, he immersed himself in his work, not bothering to check his phone at all. Until now.
By now, you've moved to the couch, head hung low, and shoulders shaking. Clear indication you're still crying over all this. He rushes to your side and tries to call out for you, hoping you'd give him a chance to explain, but you just shake your head no. You two sit there in silence, your sobs now subsided. He desperately wants to fix this but thinks you should speak first. That is if you even want to speak to him. He thinks maybe he should say something when you announce that you need space.
“Okay, I'll leave-” you cut him off. “No, I'm leaving. I- I need air.”
“Now? It's way too late for you! I'll leave; you stay,” he starts walking towards the door when you rush past him and make your way outside. “No, Leehan, I'm leaving!” you don't even give him a chance to explain before quickly disappearing.
You end up in a park late at night, slight regret seeping in due to the cold weather and eerie silence. But honestly, you're too consumed with your thoughts to really care. After gathering your thoughts, you realize now you may have overdone it with the dramatics and giving him no chance to explain. But it'd been so long since the two had an actual date and talked to each other other than the daily good mornings and 'have you eaten' messages. You were starting to get worried that the two of you were drifting apart, and sooner or later, Leehan would come to the conclusion that you guys were better off as friends than lovers.
Still in your thoughts, you fail to notice the footsteps coming your way. After you stormed off, Leehan mentally smacked himself for letting you leave in the cold late night and sprung into action. He got himself a blanket and beanies before bolting out the door. It took at least 10 minutes before he considered calling the police to start a search party for you when he spotted a familiar figure sitting all alone. He lets out a sigh of relief and rushes towards you.
“Hey,” a deep voice startles you, and you instantly get up, ready to make another run for it when you register that it was actually your boyfriend. You sit back down and turn your body away from him.
“You found me,” he hums and asks if he could sit. You shrug, which he takes as a yes, and drapes the blanket over you. You let him because honestly, you were two seconds away from becoming a statue. You're internally scolding yourself for leaving in such flimsy clothing when he speaks.
“I'm so sorry for forgetting our date. I promise I didn't ignore you on purpose. My phone was on DND, and I didn't notice, I swear. I wondered why I didn't get a good morning text from you, but I brushed it off thinking work was holding you up. I didn't want to bother you, so I let it go and eventually forgot all about it once I was called to the studio. I haven't checked my phone all day, I swear!” He glances over to you, wanting your reaction, but you're still turned around.
“I- I'm sorry; I know none of that excuses me missing our date, but I just want you to know I didn't ignore you on purpose. I love you; I would never do that,” his voice turns into a whisper towards the end due to the built-up emotions he didn't know he had. “Y/n, say something, please,” he begs with tears starting to form.
You try to stand your ground and toughen up, but your body betrays you, and before you know it, you're sobbing again. Leehan rushes to wrap his arms around you, and you let him because it feels like it's been eternity since you've held each other. You end up on his lap with the blanket wrapped around you both and his hands running through your hair to calm your sobs.
“You wanna talk about it?” he breaks the silence, and you want to shake your head no, but you know you can't avoid this forever. This time you break the silence and get out everything that's been bottling up inside of you. He stares at you dumbfounded, wondering how long you had been holding that in. Guilt fills his mind just imagining you having doubts about your relationship. He internally scolds himself for not noticing any of this sooner. Tears start to form again as you take in his dumbfounded face for something else.
“Oh no! You really are gonna break up with me, aren't you!” that brings him back to you and rushes to deny such a horrible claim.
“No, we are not breaking up! Stop thinking that.” he continues to soothe you before a gust of wind reminds him that they are still outside in the freezing cold.
“Let's go inside and talk about this,” he gently whispers and gets up carrying you back home. Once you're settled inside and warmed up, you discuss all the doubts and worries about your relationship while Leehan reassures you that nothing will break you apart. Although it'll take a while to get your relationship back to how it was before, it's all worth it if you have each other.
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winxwannabe · 1 month
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Winx Season 9/Reboot Leaks
Okay here's the tea: earlier today a twitter user by the name of Cataclysm_Power started posting a video they claimed was from the new Winx season/reboot. When pressed for further information, they linked to a telegram chat with what appeared to be assets from Rainbow (17 screenshots/2 videos). After some C-grade internet sleuthing, I am here to give my (worthless and possibly wrong) opinion on which ones I think are real and fake.
A note before we jump in: I'm not posting full images on my blog, because again I do think some of these are real and if the leaker is to be believed, they hacked Rainbow to get them. You can look yourself through the telegram link, or others who've posted them on the Winx Club tag. I also think the leaker themselves is scammy because they've tried charging for Miraculous leaks before. Do NOT give them any money if they ask.
Real: Bloom, Stella, and Icy's asset sheets, Bloom Full Body Pose
A lot of these leaks are 3d modelling assets, and these 3 are the ones I'm totally convinced are real.
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The biggest clue of their validity is the bottom banner. All 3 sheets have them, along with the same episode code and notes in Italian. They're all also linked to the same person: Pasqualino Masciulli is Rainbow's 3D modelling supervisor, and has been with the company for at least 9 years. He's done videos on Rainbow's youtube channel as well, using his shortened first name Lino. My main point is that's way too niche for someone to fake just to make some convincing leaks, and it would make sense for the assets to be tied to him.
Likewise, there's a full-body frame post of Bloom with fucking ugliest denim leg warmers credited to a g.riccobono. This is likely Giulio Riccobono, who is listed on Linkedin Italy as a Rainbow employee.
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Probably Real: Tecna's asset sheet, Bloom's detailed asset sheet
Both of these are likely real but have weird things about them that make me pause. Bloom's more detailed asset sheet is missing the name, date and episode reference on it, and the notes are in English. Tecna's is missing the bottom banner entirely, and there's some weird cutting around her head that makes it look like someone hastily made a png and stuck it on there.
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Unsure: Computer File Tab, MD Concept Photos, Videos
There's a screenshot of a folder with both 2D and 3D assets of all the girls. in the files. I'm not sure if this is from a computer at Rainbow or the hacker's personal folder, so it goes in unsure. I do think most of the assets in it are real - it's low res but the eyes on the 2D sketches are so similar to the ones on Rainbow's newer images of the girls I think they have to be connected.
There are also some full body concept photos for Bloom, Aisha, and Stella. They all look pretty legit (as they're updated version of images we've already seen) but Stella's has other images for 'possible pallets' included. She's the only one with it and the images look like they came from a flash dress-up game, and it gives me pause.
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Lastly, the teaser videos of Bloom are probably real based on the outfit, animation and that stupid fucking Bloom shelf being in the background, but I'm placing it in 'unsure' because of the bandicam.com logo burned into the top. If it really came from Rainbow and everything else was downloaded, there was no reason for the hacker to not get the raw file. I think it's real, but I don't know if it came from Rainbow.
Something Ain't Right: Group Shot
What gives me pause in the fully-rendered group shot (even though its shown in the computer file tab) is it shows transformation we haven't seen teased and has a 'Lorem Ipsum' placeholder text. Aisha's hair also looks like it was done with AI - the back of her wings clip through the hair, and parts of it look copy-pasted. I'm stupid, it's the end of her braids. The 'Lorem Ipsum' thing still stands, but I'm re-filing this under 'unsure.'
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Probably Fake: Darcy and Damien's asset sheets
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I'm showing things from here on out because I'm so convinced it's fake please let me be right. Unlike the other character sheets, the ones for Darcy and 'new character' Damien have no bottom banner, are marked as 'Winx Club Season 9' with an outdated Winx logo, and have notes written completely in English. Darcy's has a bit of 3D modelling, but it's too different from Icy's. Maybe they're super early concepts for Darcy, but Damien...go home, buddy.
You're in the Wrong Place: Rainbow Pants Girl
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I'm convinced this girl is from a different show and was saved to the 'Winx Club' folder by accident. Different clothing, hair, and shading. May you end up somewhere better than this reboot, Mystery Girl.
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Wedding vows
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Man, choosing a gif is harder than I thought *cries*
Pairing: Nie Huaisang x f!reader
Word Count: 4856 words
Warnings/tags: fluff, just love all around, Chinese wedding ensues, suggestive content, smut, this one is nsfw minors dni
Notes: (C/N)-your clan's name, (Y/N)-your name
A/N: This is the 2nd part of Proposal. You can read this is as a stand-alone, but some context might be lost. I can't believe its done, have a feast, dears!
Special thanks to this post, for providing information about Chinese weddings. I did take some liberties, but at least I did it knowingly.
It's been almost a month now that you were living in the Unclean Realm. Your brother agreed, begrudgingly at first, to let you go before the wedding because he saw how painful it was for you to stay away from your soon-to-be husband. In the end, he saw it was the right decision to let you get used to your new home beforehand.
Just one week before the wedding basically everything was turned upside down in the Unclean Realm. Both you and Nie Huaisang took part in the planning as there were no close relative of his who could take on the task. He, of course, had an exceptionally good eye for decoration, and while he was busy with clan leader's stuff, you coordinated the disciples and servants when needed.
You quickly got used to the almost colourless picture of the Unclean Realm and appreciated the calmly elegant black-grey-silver colours of your new home. The vivid red and gold decorations of the upcoming wedding, hinted with a little bit of silver, almost felt weirdly out of place now. As you entered the main hall to check on the servants' progress before retiring for the night, you stopped in awe at the entrance. Almost everything was in place now, only some adjustments were needed here and there. A huge smile spread across your face, as you couldn't help but imagine yourself entering the hall on Huaisang's arm, dressed in beautiful red and every guest's attention on you.
Speaking of Huaisang, you wondered what he was doing, as you haven't seen him all day. You decided to check on him before returning to your chambers. As you passed down the hallways, the servants were busy lighting some lanterns for the night. The sky already started to darken, and they politely greeted you as you passed them by. The guards also haven't paid attention to you, you were allowed to move freely, and they quickly got used to your presence after you moved in.
When you approached Huaisang's door, you knocked lightly to let him know of your presence but didn't actually wait for him to open the door himself. With guards present, his door was unlocked so you figured he hasn't retired for the night yet. You entered and instantly noticed his sitting form by the desk. He seemed to be completely engrossed in something, which you assumed was official documents. A light, calming incense could be smelled in the air of the warmly lit room. As you stepped closer, you noticed the not-so-neatly scattered papers on the table and some even around it on the ground. You also noticed a brush and ink, probably for writing letters. His usual fan also sat discarded on the edge of the table. Yes, he was definitely working all day, you concluded.
You stepped next to the table on his left side and shot a quick glance at the paper in front of him. It was clearly clan business. He only became aware of your presence in that moment, and he looked up at you with a tired but happy smile playing on the edge of his lips.
"Miss (C/N), it's so good to see you! Only you can make this miserable day better!"
"Oh, Huaisang, I'm sorry you had to work all day! I stopped by the main hall, and everything is almost completely ready now. You should check it out tomorrow. What's all this anyway?" You asked gesturing at the scattered papers all around his desk.
"You wouldn't believe it! Almost all of this are letters offering support, inquiring about accommodation, or asking for details about the banquet. There are also official papers about finances and clan politics. And I have to sort these out before the wedding! Why does everybody want a piece of me?"
"Hmm, I think," you pretended to think hard while you sat down next to him on the ground, "you are quite a catch."
He let out a disbelieving sound, but you continued, counting on your fingers.
"You are wealthy, the leader of one of the four big clans, a clever and intelligent man, you are a very talented artist, you have great taste in clothing, you do what you need to but don't meddle in other's business, you are funny and kind. Oh, and have I mentioned exceptionally handsome?"
"Ahh, stop, stop, stop, stop!" He protested, nose scrunched up and hands held out in front of his chest.
You let out a short laugh because of his adorably childish attitude and turned your body so you were sitting face to face now. You reached out and grabbed his hands. So warm and soft, they fit perfectly into yours.
"I'm serious," you said looking into his eyes.
And he believed you. His face straightened out, his eyes searching yours, lips parted only a tiny bit in awe, but you couldn't help but notice. He also noticed where you were looking, his eyes wandering down to your lips in turn. When your eyes met again, you could see the question in his eyes and you leaned closer to him, a barely noticeable movement. But that's all he needed. The next moment he leaned in, and his lips were on yours, hands moving around your waist to pull you closer. You gasped, one hand touching his chest for purchase, the other reaching up to cradle his cheek. His kisses were slow and sensual.
"I don't think you should praise me this much. I might become overly confident," he whispered into your lips between kisses.
"Well, surely we don't need another peacock."
You let go of each other's lips and burst out laughing, your foreheads touching the whole time.
•• ━━━━━ ••●•• ━━━━━ ••
The day of the wedding arrived quickly. As you were getting ready with help of your maids, you listened to the commotion outside as guests continued to arrive. Everyone had to settle in their temporary rooms and led to the main hall where the wedding will take place. Once everyone was here the ceremony started while food and drinks were being prepared by the servants for the following banquet.
You were quite nervous because basically the whole cultivation world will witness your union. At least the other three big clans, the Lanling Jin, the Gusu Lan and the Yunmeng Jiang were obviously invited, and some of the smaller clans too thanks to your side. Jiang Wanyin was Huaisang's old friend, while Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao were Nie Mingjue's sworn brothers so you were sure they will be attending. Lan Wangji apparently made up some excuse, so he didn't need to come and if you were honest, you liked it this way. His achievements certainly deserved respect, but he was famously uninterested in, even disgusted by celebrations which involved lively music and drinking.
Putting on the wedding dress was the quickest part of the whole procedure as braiding your hair in the Nie style and preparing your make-up took a few hours. Finally, your head was covered with a red veil to complete the look. Soon you were being led out to meet your husband the entrance of the main hall. Nervousness rose in your chest, but it subsided somewhat when you arrived. You were signaled to stop, and you felt warm hands gently wrapping around yours.
"Huaisang?" Your words came out as barely a whisper because somehow you felt like the wedding atmosphere shouldn't be bothered by talking.
"I'm here," he answered in kind and squeezed your hand a little as reassurance before wrapping a soft red silk ribbon around your wrist. It was to ensure you won't trip as you could barely see anything through your veil, and it also symbolised your union.
You only noticed the soft music and light chatter in the background when you started to walk up the few stairs leading to the main hall. But the hushed voices completely stopped when you stepped into the hall. Thankfully you knew how the room was prepared, so you remembered that you only had to take a few steps before you reached the pillows placed on the ground for you to perform your bows. Huaisang also made sure to make measured movements and helped you the best he could in signalling when you needed to stop walking and kneel down.
Being led by Huaisang while you almost couldn't see anything felt strangely romantic to you, like he was the only person in the whole world you could trust and to whom you could give complete control over yourself. This vulnerability felt frightening at first as you could feel every guest's eyes on your back, like realizing a dangerous predator is stalking you in the forest. But soon your senses focused completely on Huaisang. You could almost feel his warmth radiating through the cloth that bound your hands together.
You bowed in sync, first to pay respect to Heaven and Earth, second to Huaisang's parents, and finally to each other. You stood up and felt your legs shaking from relief and happiness. You were married! You still couldn't believe it. Soon you heard the commotion as your guests stood up and drank a cup of liquor to your marriage. One by one they approached you to congratulate you and wish you health and happiness. Huaisang held your hand in his and you could feel his palm was sweaty from nerves, but you didn't mind. You thanked the guests for their well-wishes and also said farewell. You recognized some of the voices and you were glad that your husband will be taken care of by people like Lan Xichen and Jiang Wanyin during the banquet.
The few hours you spent alone, sitting in silence on your now shared bed in Nie Huaisang's room felt like a relief after the ceremony. So far everything went well, you completed the wedding without any mishaps, and you hoped that everything goes smoothly at the banquet too. Time flew by surprisingly quickly while you meditated. Your focus was disturbed by muffled voices coming through the closed door. When it slid open, you could hear the finishing sentences of the two people's conversation outside.
"Don't be nervous. Everything will be fine," you recognized the soft and calm voice of Jin Guangyao.
"Thank you, San-ge," replied Huaisang, and closed the door behind him as he stepped into the room.
He didn't move for a few seconds and the anticipation in you grew stronger and stronger. You were patient the whole day, but now you just wanted to finally see him, see him in his wedding robes. He walked closer, ever so slow, hesitation palpable. In the dim light of the candles, you could see his silhouette when he stepped in front of you. You felt it when he finally grabbed your veil at the sides and with a quick motion, he lifted it up, letting it float down to the floor.
You were not one of those old traditional couples in the sense that you already knew each other before the wedding. Yet now, when both of you finally looked at each other, it felt like seeing a heavenly being for the first time. Wide eyes, lips parted you marvelled at each other's beauty. He has seen you in your dress during the ceremony, but your face adorned with tasteful make-up and your hair decorated with jewelry, braided specially to signify you were now the wife of a Nie took his breath away. You, on the other hand, had to take in his full visage. His red robes, with gold and black woven in, were of a thinner material than his usual attire, so it perfectly accentuated his snatched waist and wide shoulders. The guan in his hair were gold and it had a bolder style than his usual silver ones, just like the braids. When your gaze stopped at his face your breath hitched in your throat because of the open love and desire you saw in his eyes.
"You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen," he finally spoke, his voice low.
"I...," you had to clear your throat after not speaking for such a long time, "we should drink the alcohol," you managed to say, standing up and walking to the table nervously.
You poured the fine liquor into two small cups and handed one to Huaisang. He took it gently and waited for you with his arm held out. You joined him, holding your own cup, and you intertwined your arms as you drank the alcohol with one gulp. When you finished you looked at each other, arms still linked and smiled, feeling the tension of the day leaving your body. You almost knocked your heads together as you wanted to put the cups down back on the table at the same time.
"We should sit down," he suggested, but the suggestion sounded like a tentative question.
You nodded your head. He must be tired after entertaining your guests, you thought. Luckily, he was not drunk so his friends must have kept a close eye on him. He could also direct some of his qi to get rid of the alcohol, but that also exhausted him after a while. You knew what was expected of you on your wedding night, but you didn't want to pressure him if he felt too tired after such a long day.
So, you sat on the edge of your bed in silence for a few moments before you felt his hand reaching out for yours. You flicked your gaze over where your hand rested on the bed between your bodies. His hand was not much bigger than yours but still big enough to cradle yours, and you always marveled at how soft and warm they felt. You noticed how his other hand were playing with the jade pendant hanging from his belt and you moved your free hand to gently lay on his thigh. You intended to soothe his nerves, but the moment your hand connected with his leg, you felt his muscles twitch. You looked up into his eyes and what you saw made your breath quicken. His dark brown eyes looked almost completely black now as his pupils widened. For a split second his gaze moved down to your mouth, and you did the same in return. You noticed how his lips relaxed, opening only the slightest amount and you found yourself wanting to kiss him so bad. When your gazes met again, he leaned towards you slowly, still holding your gaze, gauging your reaction.
And your lips connected.
It felt like fireworks exploded between you. You felt how his hand pushed yours into the mattress as he leaned in closer, his body weight shifting to his arm between you. His other arm sneaked around your waist to pull you closer, as he always did when you were kissing, only this time the kiss was different. It was much more forceful, brave, and charged with desire.
When you let go of each other's lips for a moment, both of you were breathing hard.
"I love you so much. You are the best thing in my life," he breathed into your lips, and you swore you saw his eyes shining.
"I love you too, I love you-," you said in return, the last syllable muffled as he captured your lips again.
Sitting with your feet on the ground while your body turned towards him started to feel uncomfortable, so you moved to sit on his lap, not letting go of his lips or hand for a second. When you settled your weight on his thighs, he moved his hands to your cheeks at first, then moved them down to your neck, tracing your collar bones with his fingers. You grabbed onto his robes and let go of his lips with a sigh. His hands moved away immediately, thinking his touch were unwelcome.
"Don't stop. It... felt good," you said nervously and smiled shyly at him.
This time he moved his hands to your waist, where the sash held your garments together.
"May I?" He asked seriously, his voice trembling a little.
You gulped and nodded your head rapidly. His touch was featherlight, you almost couldn't feel it when he reached for the opening of your sash and carefully removed it. The material of your robe loosened, and he moved to remove your outer garment entirely. You realized you were sitting on the skirt, so you needed to stand back up if you wanted to remove the whole thing.
"I need to get up to get this out of the way," you said to him when he freed your arms and only your undershirt remained on the upper half of your body.
You quickly realized that part of his nervousness came from the fact that he didn't want to scare you away, so you warned him of your intentions beforehand. He nodded and reluctantly let go of you as you stood up from his lap.
The room was warm, but you still felt a slight chill as your outer robe descended to the floor. The coldness faded when you looked into Huaisang's fiery gaze and the air suddenly felt impossibly hot as he stepped closer to you. His hands moved to your shoulders, gently caressing them and slowly moving towards your chest. Your breath quickened, his light touches searing hot through your thin undergarment. A shiver ran through your whole body as his hands gently cradled your soft breasts and he sucked in a sharp breath when your nipples hardened under his thumbs.
"Please, Huaisang, I want to feel your touch on my skin!" You felt a little embarrassed about how whiny your voice sounded, but you wanted to show him how much you wanted his touch.
He leaned in to kiss at your jawline and neck while his hands deftly removed your undergarments. As your clothes pooled around your ankles, he took a step back to admire your naked body. You suddenly felt self-conscious, and your hands instinctively moved to cover yourself up. Huaisang noticed it and took your hands into his to stop you.
"Don't be shy. I still can't believe I've managed to get myself such a beautiful and intelligent wife" he said, looking into your eyes the whole time.
You wanted to say something witty and clever, but the moment felt too sincere for it, so instead you answered:
"Don't forget that I wanted to be yours."
He stepped closer to you again, his mouth finding yours. He kissed you like a drowning man, never wanting to let go of you. His hands roamed over every part of your body he could reach and you wanted to finally touch his skin too. Your hands tugged on the lapels of his dress, signalling you wanted it off. He broke the kiss when he felt a more insistent tug.
"Take it off!" You managed to breath out and he chuckled at your insistence.
"You want more of me, huh?" He asked with that cocky self-assurance he only used with his closest friends back at Cloud Recesses.
You crossed your arms across your chest with a defiant look and you must have looked funny standing like that while being stark naked. But it worked, and Huaisang looked at you as if he were saying "Fine, fine," and reached for his belt. The strength gradually left your arms as you watched him undress, and by the time he only had his white underrobe on, your arms were hanging by your side.
When he moved to remove it too, you couldn't just stand there anymore and stepped in front of him, grabbing onto his hands. Your sudden movement startled him a little as his focus were completely on his clothes. You reached for the cloth that bound his underrobe together and undid it slowly, looking into his eyes the whole time. He moved his hands out of the way and followed the path of yours with his eyes as you reached up to his shoulders, pushing the light fabric down.
And he stood there only in a pair of white trousers, chest bare, skin like pristine jade, accentuated by his dark hair cascading down his back. You couldn't help but marvel at his beauty. As a healer you saw many men and women in various stages of undress, mostly injured soldiers. At those times your interest was not particularly focused on their looks, but you remembered how strong and muscular they were. Now, as you were looking at your husband's bare upper body, you realised that you never really found them attractive. Compared to them Huaisang had a soft body, but his chest was nicely toned and you could see the lean muscles of his arms.
You reached up and traced his collar bones with your fingers then moved downwards and stopped on his chest. You could feel how strong and fast his heart was beating under your right palm. His skin was so soft, smooth and warm, you couldn't help but tenderly caress the shape of his pecs, noticing how his small nipples stood at attention from your touch, much like yours before. You slowly slid your hands down to his stomach, following the made-up path of the cute little moles that were scattered everywhere on his skin. You felt the muscles tensing under the skin of his stomach as you went even lower, stopping where a soft patch of dark hair disappeared under the band of his underpants. As you ran your fingers over his happy trail, loving how the soft hairs tickled your fingertips, you heard Huaisang biting back a whiny moan. Your eyes moved back to his face and oh, what you saw took your breath away. He bit down on his lower lip, eyebrows furrowed, as he watched with half-lidded eyes where your hands were going.
You moved your hands out of your line of sight and your gaze lowered past the waist of his pants. He was already hard enough to form a nicely visible tent in his pants. You realised there was no turning back if you took the next step and it scared you a little, but also made you incredibly excited. You wanted it and you wanted him, but it still surprised you how boldly you reached down and caressed him lightly through his pants. This time his moan was deeper, more guttural, and he almost literally fell on you as he rested his forehead on your shoulder. Your knowledge was mostly medical about how the male body worked, so the late-night conversations with your already married friends came in handy. You felt proud about how much your touch affected Huaisang. Your next caress was a little firmer and you felt him twitch under your palm. Gathering his every strength, Huaisang stepped back and pulled you towards the bed.
"(Y/N), please, it's been too long, and I fear I won't last long if you keep this up. I want all of you tonight. Can I show you how much?"
"Okay," your voice was barely a whisper, and you let yourself being laid down on the bed.
Huaisang quickly got rid of his remaining garments and carefully removed the intricate guan, now only a black silk ribbon keeping his hair together. As he climbed on top of you, you instinctively opened your legs to make room for him as he rested his weight on his elbows next to your shoulders. This way he was the only thing you could see, but there was nothing else you wished to see at this moment. A large amount of his long hair fell over his shoulders and caressed your cheeks. He was so beautiful as a soft smile played on his lips and you reached up to kiss him. It quickly turned heated and Huaisang soon left your lips in order to kiss all over your face and neck. Then he moved lower and grabbed one of your breasts with his hand while he occupied his mouth with sucking on the other nipple. Your sighs of pleasure encouraged him to move his hand lower while his mouth kept playing with your nipples.
At first your hips shied away from his touch but when his deft fingers found the most pleasurable spot between your legs you couldn't bite back a moan. His mouth left your breasts as he moved to carefully watch your reaction while his other hand kept your legs in place.
"You are doing amazing, you are so wet already," he praised and slowly pushed his index finger inside you.
"Huaisang...," you moaned his name as you watched his finger disappear inside you.
This was something you already tried yourself on lonely nights but the fact that it was his finger made the experience completely different and so much better. He moved his finger slowly in and out of you and when you felt like you couldn't take it anymore, he removed his hand. You whined at the sudden loss of contact, but he moved back on top of you and kissed the complaints off of your lips.
"Are you ready?" He asked, and you were never this sure about anything in your life.
"Yes, I want you, please."
He reached down and guided his cock to your entrance, rubbing it over your wetness, using your combined arousal as a lubricant. Even this little delay and the feeling of his hot member so close to where you wanted it made you squirm. He was looking into your eyes the whole time and you saw how he had to fight he urge to close them when he started to finally push inside you. He was slow and careful, and when he was fully seated inside both of you stopped to catch your breaths. The stretch was unfamiliar but not unpleasant. You moaned when you felt his cock twitching and your insides tightened around him in response. Now it was his turn to let out a shaky breath as he let his forehead rest against yours. He simply couldn't hold his composure anymore, so he slowly started to pull out and push back again. At first you felt a tiny prick of pain, but it soon faded and was replaced by pure pleasure. And he was quick to react to your signs, so when you reached up and grabbed onto his hair to find support, he knew he found that special spot. Soon you were a moaning mess, being so close to your release and he was no different, his skin shining from sweat and strands of his hair sticking to his cheeks and neck.
"a-Sang!" You repeated over and over, and finally hearing you calling him that, it was enough to push him through the edge.
He sealed your lips in a desperate kiss, one of his hands reaching down to rub your clit, his other arm shaking from the effort of keeping his body from fully collapsing on top of you. The feeling of his desperate thrusts, his hand on your most sensitive spot and his shaky moans calling your name finally triggered your orgasm. You felt your inner walls clenching impossibly tight around him and you desperately clawed at his back, not really caring at that moment if you were leaving marks on his skin.
He collapsed on top you, the last of his strength leaving his body as both of you tried to catch your breath. Your vision slowly cleared, and the ringing disappeared from your eyes as you subconsciously caressed his head and shoulders. He burrowed his head into the crook of your neck, and you swore you could hear him practically purring like a cat.
The air in the room slowly started to dry off the sweat from your bodies and it soon made you both shiver. Huaisang rolled off of you with a series of unintelligible whines and went to fetch a cloth to clean yourselves up. He wetted it with the prepared warm water and carefully cleaned your most sensitive spots. He couldn't help but leave some lazy kisses around your hips and thighs in the process and the feeling of his gentle touches were almost enough to lull you into sleep.
He quickly cleaned himself up too and climbed back into the bed next to you, pulling the luxurious covers over your naked bodies. You moved to lay your head on his chest, positioning your ear over his heart, its steady beating made you feel completely safe. He sneaked his arms around you, pulling you even closer. You looked up at him and you smiled at how his hair was a complete mess now, yet he looked so handsome in the faint glow of the candlelight, his eyes shining with so much love you thought your chest will explode because of it.
"Thank you, tonight was incredible," you said as you drew small patterns on his chest with your fingers.
You swore you could see his ears redden even in the faint light, and you planted a soft kiss on his pecs before you fully relaxed in his arms.
"I love you a-(Y/N), get some sleep now," you heard him say before you fell into a blissful sleep.
THE END
ps. I have a half written morning-after snippet, let me know if you are interested and I'll finish it.
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the-possum-writes · 8 months
Note
Hi! Could you do a Finn x Fem reader lemon? Maybe it could be with and inexperienced reader while finn already has some knowledge about it and shows her how to do it. Thank you! <3
[Finn with an Inexperienced Reader]
❥Character: Finn Mertens
❥Tags: NS/FW hc's, handj0bs, established relationship, fem!reader
❥Synopsis: Finn takes things slow with you but you convince him to teach you how he likes to be touched.
❥A/N: I was going through a writing block so there's no full smut but rather some handsy stuff.
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❥Whether you've been dating for years or just a few weeks, if you tell Finn you want to take things slowly, he'll respect your wishes.
❥Only kissing and hugging, nothing more.
❥But that doesn't take away how startling it is when a kissing session becomes too intense, and just as you feel the warmth cling to your heart and stomach in a tightening squeeze, Finn pulls away from you and acts as if nothing happened, resuming whatever video game you were playing or changing the subject.
❥You know where babies come from and all that basic biology class, but you have yet to personally experience it and are kind of wary of unplanned pregnancies, that's why you told Finn you wanted to take things slow.
❥And he was okay with that, but it didn't stop the growing doubt since you know he's had past encounters with other girls before. "Is he getting frustrated at me cause I'm making him wait?" you'd start asking yourself.
❥Finn is a passionate and outgoing guy who pours his heart into everything he does, whether it's fighting monsters, reading comic books, or simply indulging in his favorite meals. And, given how much he adores you, you're filled with illogical guilt at the thought of preventing Finn from physically expressing his feelings for you.
❥You've already asked him directly. "Finn, are you mad that we haven't done couple things?"
"But we always do couple things."
"No I mean like, tier 15 stuff and all that."
"Oh... Not really.."
❥He's a straightforward and laid-back guy, so it didn't occur to you until lately when, on a day when you didn't feel confident, you pushed yourself to kiss him by placing your hand on his thigh and running it upward. Finn stopped you by holding your hand so he could ask you, "Are you sure you want to do this now?"
You try to kiss his neck while saying, "I know you've been dying to-," but Finn is insistent. If there's anything he's learnt from his previous relationship, it's to avoid diving into pleasures on a whim.
"It's not about what I want, I'm asking about you." His tone has changed a little bit, especially in light of your earlier question.
❥As self-doubt circles in your thoughts and seeps beyond your eyes, you choose to keep quiet, but Finn squooze-hugs you to his chest.
"We don't need to rush anything; I'm pretty happy with you so far. We can do those things when you don't have any more uncertainties in your lovely head."
❥"Alright, there's something I can teach ya but we have to keep our voices down. You don't need to take off anything so don't worry, we'll just be using your hands."
❥"But what if I do wanna do those things but I want to take it a small step at a time? Like when you taught me how to swim." you bring up.
Finn adjusts his hold on you, the two of you were in the middle of a movie night and are currently on the couch. Jake is already asleep and BMO is probably lurking around the treefort but he promised to not peep at you two during visiting hours.
❥Finn leans back on the couch's headrest, allowing you to rest on his thighs as he tells you."How about I give you a lesson in Finn-biology?" he chuckles."I can't say no to my favorite subject." you respond. Considering the stories and experiences you've heard from your close friends, you have only a rough idea of what he's considering, but you're nonetheless anxious, intrigued, and interested about it.
❥Finn starts out by smooching you, easing a bit of your nerves as he gently grabs your hand and lowers it down his chest until it reaches his groin, he motions for you to rub him through his shorts, feeling something grow underneath.
❥It's warm, really warm.
❥Finn raises himself from the couch to lower his shorts with his underwear, and you remain silent while watching his half hard dick peeking out from the confines of his baby blue trousers. You temptingly touch his head with the tip of your fingers, unconsciously wrapping more and more of your around around him until he finches a bit, pulling away at the discouragement. "It's okay, it just needs something slick." he assures you. At the mention of it you're unconsciously rubbing your thighs together upon feeling something getting wet downstairs, but you don't bring it up.
❥The attention has Finn squirming in his spot but he continues with the lesson.
"Give me your hand." he asks. When you do he purposely spits on his dick and guides your hand to smear it all over him, amplifying the prominent musky smell coming from him.
"It's sensitive here." he explains in short breaths, hearing his panting picking up the more you run your fingers over the underside of his shaft right where it connects with his pink gland.
❥Once you've gotten the hang of it, Finn releases your hand and lets you try a few more things. What if I squeeze here? What if I touch this tiny hole with my finger? What if I gently squeeze his balls? Finn struggles to form meaningful sentences any longer and is only able to utter things like, "Just like that," "That feels good," and "Wait not like that, there you go... Oh Glob..."
❥It's a hypnotic and undeniably sexy experience, watching him lose himself in his own pleasure to the point where he forgot the reason for this little lesson until he came all over your palm and soiled his own shirt in the process.
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bella-rose29 · 7 months
Text
You Shall Go to the Ball!
Anthony Lockwood x f!Karim!reader
Requested by anon: Hey, I don't know if you accept requests, but I have one. Reader(she is George's sister) accompanies Lockwood&co to the ball at Fittes and she is jealous when she sees Lockwood talking to the girl (maybe reader enemy or something)most of the time. She decides to interrupt the conversation and introduces herself as his wife, while showing the ring Lucy gave her, explaining what to do. A long chapter please😊
I am so sorry that this took so long anon 😭 (I'm also not sure about the title tbh but oh well)
a long chapter this will be! I made the reader George's adopted sister (I hope that's ok!). I also made this super long because I got so carried away and if it deviates from what you wanted then I'm so sorry my lovely
I made it just... a generic ball? I don't know if you had one specifically in mind but I thought it would fit better to have an occasion where they aren't fighting for their lives lol
sorry if your name is Maya bc that is the name of Lucy's crush in this and also sorry if your name is Steph bc she's the enemy of the reader (I had to put names in I'm sorry 🥲)
Word count: 9.8k (I'm doing my bit you guys)
Warnings: swearing, a sexual innuendo or two, bullying (mostly focused on the fact the reader is adopted), lockwood and reader love each other but they haven't done anything about it, tumblr lagged while I wrote most of this so there are probably mistakes, lockwood has some mildly self-deprecating thoughts, mentions of lockwood's suicidal tendencies, there's probably more but idk what
Tag list: @anathemaloren, @augustisintheair, @avdiobliss, @dangelnleif, @el-de-phi, @ell0ra-br3kk3r, @informedimagining, @karensirkobabes, @mischivana, @mitskiswift99, @mrsklockwood, @mrsyixingunicorn10, @novelizt, @ran23sblog, @superpositvecloudshipper, @t2sh0, @taygrls, @tournesol77, @wandamaximoffbae, @whenselenefallsinlove, @wordsarelife
As always, let me know here if you would like to be added to/removed from the tag list for my lockwood and co works (or drop me a message!) <3
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Y/n was not happy.
She ought to have been, given the occasion, but she was very much unhappy instead.
Lucy was trying not to laugh too loudly, but was failing at her attempts to stifle just how funny she found the whole situation. "You know," she said between breathy laughs, "all of this would be a whole lot easier if you just told him how you feel."
"Nope. Not happening. Every time I try I freeze up and blabber some unintelligible words that make no sense, and I look like an idiot. So no."
The 'him' in question was Anthony Lockwood, the head of Lockwood and Co and resident of 35 Portland Row. Lucy Carlyle, George Karim and Holly Munro lived here too, and as George's sister Y/n had been invited to Lucy's 18th birthday party. It was a small party, only the five of them (six if you included the Skull, but only Lucy could hear it so Y/n didn't), but the atmosphere was lively and music was playing over the speakers George had set up. Banners and balloons stating 'Happy Birthday!' were strewn all over the living room (Y/n could already see Holly's eye twitching at the amount of confetti on the floor), and the boys were busy refilling glasses (another reason not to count the Skull - it had nothing to hold a drink with).
"You have to do it at some point though," she whispered into Y/n's ear. "But right now, you need to move." Lucy pointed in the direction Y/n was supposed to go, and she tilted her head back as she groaned.
"Remind me why you ever made me play this game?"
"Because it's my birthday, and you love me. Go on, unless you wanna forfeit."
"You're evil," Y/n hissed as she pushed herself off of the floor and made her way over to Lockwood. "I'm sorry, again."
"I'm not sure what for, to be honest. You're just playing the game." He smiled up at her from his place by the fire, and Y/n tried to ignore George's glare. "George, please stop looking at me like that. Lucy was the one who dared Y/n to sit on me." Y/n felt her face warm at his words, knowing that this night could only end in disaster for her, and decided to bite the bullet. Huffing, she turned and sat down, her back facing Lockwood as her legs went either side of his, and she let out a small yelp of surprise when his arms snaked around her waist and pulled her against him. Lucy only laughed, loud and obnoxious, and Y/n couldn't find it in her to shoot a look, still too taken aback by the feel of being hugged by Lockwood in this way. "You alright?" he asked, voice quiet and gentle in her ear, and she felt his breath on the side of her face.
"Y-yeah. I'm alright. How are you?" She cringed at herself, but his light chuckle reverberated through her and calmed her immediately.
"I'm alright. Quite comfy, actually. You're very warm." As if to back up his point he snuggled in to her shoulder, nose rubbing against the side of her neck, and Y/n almost choked. Instead she made a sort of strangled noise, and he stopped and looked up at her as though he was about to say something. Lockwood opened his mouth, but was cut off by George.
"Okay, she's sat on him, can she go back now? I don't wanna look at this anymore."
"George, Lucy dared her to do it for the rest of the game," Holly piped up, clearly enjoying this as much as Lucy. She also knew about Y/n's feelings for Lockwood, the three of them having had multiple nights where they talked for hours about the other two members of Lockwood and Co, and hadn't wasted any time at all in joining Lucy in her teasing about Y/n's crush. "Rules are rules, I'm afraid."
"Yeah, and it's my birthday, so don't even start to think about asking to stop the game. Besides, they look quite comfortable now, wouldn't wanna make 'em move again, would we?"
"I'm very comfortable, thanks Luce," Lockwood said, his hold tightening on Y/n.
"Y-yep. Perfectly good." Lucy and Holly shared a look, stifling their laughter. George sat back and crossed his arms over his chest, huffing at the scene in front of him. Y/n's brother also knew about her feelings for his boss, and he while he wasn't exactly mad about it, he also wasn't thrilled. She knew that he meant well, and was only looking out for her (especially since Lockwood tended to throw himself directly into danger most of the time), but a little support would be appreciated.
The rest of the game went without much incident, although George did have to stick his hand in the toilet (a dare from Holly that nobody expected, although since her arrival in the house the toilets were spotless so it wasn't much of a trial), and by the time Y/n realised that she should be getting home it was well past midnight.
"Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Okay, um- Lockwood! Hi!" He had just entered the living room where Y/n was stood clearing up (the others had gone up to their respective bedrooms), and she apprehended him in the doorway. "Can you help me call a taxi? I need to go home now and it's really late and-"
"Woah, slow down!" He placed his hands on her shoulders, a smile on his face. "Why don't you just stay over, yeah? It's what, two in the morning? You might as well sleep here and leave after breakfast. Your parents probably expected you to stay here anyway, right?" She nodded. It was a common occurrence for her to stay the night at Portland Row when visiting, since she didn't see them all that much. "So it's not a problem, really. You can take my bed if you like, save waking the others up."
"Lockwood, you really don't have to do that," Y/n started, but he cut her off.
"Nonsense. Holly's stayed too, so I'd feel bad if I turfed you out at this time of night."
"No, I mean giving me your bed. You don't have to do that." He shrugged, then moved to grab a blanket from one of the cupboards.
"I'll be alright, I'll sleep on the sofa. Seriously, Y/n/n, it's fine." He flashed her one of his smiles, and instantly she melted and gave in.
"Ugh, fine. But don't complain tomorrow morning when your back hurts," she wagged a finger at him, exhaustion winning out over guilt about taking his bed as she moved towards the door.
"Alright," he laughed, and Y/n didn't think she'd heard a better sound.
She traipsed upstairs and got ready for bed, and when she fell asleep moments after settling in she dreamed of the brown haired boy downstairs.
~~~
Y/n was sat at home in her room a day or so later when George burst in, arms filled with papers and glasses skewed on his nose.
"I've been thinking," he started, dumping the papers on the end of her bed and flopping next to her.
"Hi, Georgie, I'm doing great, thanks. What am I doing? Oh, not much, just sat here reading a book and listening to music." She sent him a pointed look to which he huffed and lightly slapped her arm.
"Shut up. Hi, how are you? Great, nice, okay. Can you listen to me now?"
"What?"
"So I've been thinking about you and Lockwood, and I've decided I don't mind too much. I mean, it's irritating, really, but technically I don't need to do a boyfriend check because I live with him so I know all his nasty habits and that, and I know that he's loyal to a fault, which is something I should probably raise with him, actually," George paused, frowning as he lost his train of thought.
"Um- okay... Where has this come from? I thought you wanted me to stop liking him?"
"Yeah, but then I had to listen to him pining after you for the last two hours at the Archives and I realised that maybe it would be better if you just got together already." Y/n stared at him in shock, processing the information her brother had just spewed.
"Wait, wait. Lockwood likes me? Are you sure?"
"Completely. This isn't some hypothesis or theory, it's fact. My sanity can prove it because it's nearly all gone."
"Okay, but... you're sure? Like this isn't a joke, right?"
"No! It's not a joke! God, you really are perfect for each other; he said the same thing you know. Didn't believe that I was telling the truth about you reciprocating his feelings. Seriously, you're both idiots for not seeing it, I mean, he let you sit on him a couple of days ago!"
"That was part of a game!" Y/n spluttered, face heating at the memory of his hands around her and his head in the crook of her neck.
"Well he wouldn't have cosied up to me, would he!" Y/n fell backwards against the headboard, hands pressed to her face as she groaned in frustration."You're still not gonna do anything about it, are you?" George was quieter now, and Y/n moved her hands slightly to peer at him through her fingers.
"Correct. I want cold hard proof before I make a proper fool of myself and have to never go to Portland Row again for fear of dying from embarrassment." Now it was George's turn to groan in frustration.
"Well somebody's just going to have to engineer a situation where you confess then, aren't they?!"
"Please, no. I will murder you while you sleep if you try anything." George was impassive when Y/n glared at him, used to her threats of death.
"Fine! I won't do anything, alright! Happy?"
"Sort of." They sat in comfortable silence for a little while, Y/n trying to read her book again but eventually getting too distracted by the mountain of paperwork that her brother hadn't touched since arriving. "What is all that, anyway?" she pointed to the end of the bed.
"Oh, my research for a case we have in a couple of days. I couldn't sit with Lockwood anymore, he was driving me insane."
Y/n rolled her eyes at her brother's dramatics. "Do you want help looking through it all?"
"Please. I have no doubts that Lockwood will be doing anything but research right now, and there's a lot to get through. At least I know that you'll stay focused."
"Come on then. Oh, are you staying for dinner? Mum's cooking tonight so you know it'll be good."
"I might do. I get caught up in this stuff anyway so we'll see what time it is. Thanks for the help, Y/n/n."
"No problem, Georgie." She ruffled his hair, laughing when he practically threw himself off of the bed to escape. He landed on the floor with a thud, only making Y/n laugh harder.
"I hate you," he said, sitting up and glaring at her through wonky glasses. "You're the devil, I swear."
~~~
Lockwood and George were cleaning the equipment after yet another successful case when George dropped the chains he was oiling and looked up at his boss.
"I don't get it," he started, making Lockwood glance up with a frown.
"Get what?"
"You barely know Y/n, and you only ever interact when she's here with us, so how are you so hopeless when it comes to my sister?"
Lockwood blushed as he remembered all the times he'd lied to his friends, telling them that he was going on a supply run or heading to the shops when in reality he was making his way to the cafe that Y/n worked at. He spent a good hour or so in there multiple times a week, and sometimes he'd offer to walk her home at the end of her shift, desperate for another few minutes in her presence. Since first meeting her not long after George joined his agency (she'd brought cake, homemade, saying that she wanted to give George a 'congrats on the new job!' present) Lockwood had wanted to be around her all the time; she was like the sun, and everything was gloomy without her. The first time he'd showed up at her place of work, he'd pretended it was a coincidence, acting surprised when he saw her behind the counter. Truthfully, he'd taken a gamble on whether or not she'd be working that day, but the blinding smile that was present on her face as she served customers (although Lockwood could tell it was a fake one) immediately told him that his gamble had paid off.
"Lockwood? Hi! How are you? How's Georgie doing, is he alright? Oh, did you want anything?"
"Just a tea, thanks love," he'd replied, not meaning for the term of endearment to slip out, but her resultant blush was enough to make him decide on repeating it. She started making a cup (he'd asked for it to take away), asking questions every now and then to get his order right, and he answered those as well as her previous questions about George. Eventually, he'd had to leave, paying for the tea he now held and exiting the shop with a promise to come back soon when she'd waved goodbye. It had become a sort of ritual for the two of them, Lockwood appearing a couple of times a week, sometimes to sit at a table with some case files, others he would just get his order to go, but he'd find a way to talk to her every time. On the days when he'd promised to walk her home she would have a cup of tea already prepared for him, sat on his usual table in the corner next to a plate of whatever pastry or cake she thought that he would enjoy. At some point over the years, Lockwood had started feeling his cheeks heat up whenever Y/n smiled at him, or butterflies start up in his stomach when their hands brushed, and eventually he'd had to accept the fact that he was falling in love with her.
"Lockwood? Lockwood! Back to the present, please!" George demanded, snapping his fingers in front of his friend's face. He was sure it had only been a few seconds, but George was annoyed all the same at Lockwood's daydreaming. He huffed in frustration, picking up the chains again."You two are insufferable, do you know that? Seriously, just ask her out already. She feels the same and you know it."
"I thought you didn't want me dating your sister?" Lockwood frowned, feeling hope start to bloom in his chest.
"Yeah, well, then I had to sit and listen to you talk about her for two hours the other day and I lost my mind."
"Oh. Well. I wasn't that annoying, was I?" George only stared at him, expression saying 'Are you serious?' and Lockwood had his answer.
"Just, I don't know. You both like each other, so why not? It'll save me from the pining at least."
Lockwood was quiet for a while, mulling over George's words. "I just know that she can do better than me," he eventually said, not looking up from the boots he was polishing. "I don't want her to... regret being with me, or something."
"Lockwood, having spent the last four years listening to her talk about you I can say with confidence that she won't regret being with you. All I ask is that you dial down the suicidal tendencies on cases, yeah? I really don't want to deal with her heartbroken." George's voice was the softest Lockwood had ever heard it, and Lockwood nodded his assent.
"Alright. I'm not making any promises though Sometimes my suicidal tendencies help us stop dying instead."
"I'm not doing much better than that, am I?"
"Nope. I will be slightly less chaotic on cases and that's as much as I can do for you."
"Fine. Keep polishing those boots, you've missed a spot."
~~~
It was a few weeks later when Lucy called Y/n up in a panic, yelling random words down the phone and ranting about something that sounded important.
"Lucy, Lucy! Stop talking for a moment!" The other girl did so, promptly falling silent, and Y/n took a breath. "What's happened?"
"There's this party- ball- thing that Fittes are throwing in like, two weeks, and we have to go because we've been invited but I have nothing to wear. At all. And you always know what to do in these situations so I figured you could help me?"
She was quiet for a moment, and then said "But it's... in two weeks?"
"Yeah."
"So why are you worrying about it right now?"
"Because loads of people have been invited, Y/n! What if the perfect outfit sells out? What if I end up in something I hate because there was nothing else?"
"Wait, wait wait." Y/n sat forward on her bed, pulling the phone off of the nightstand when the cord no longer reached. "Are you trying to impress somebody?" Now it was Lucy's turn to be quiet, and Y/n scoffed in disbelief. "Oh my god, Lucy Carlyle, do you have a crush?!"
"No, I don't! Shut up! Ugh! You are so annoying, for fuck's sake!"
"You totally do! You so have a crush! Who is it? Tell me!"
"I am telling you nothing, you nosey little bastard!"
"Okay, okay! Fine! I will get this information out of you, I hope you know. When do you wanna go shopping then?"
"Today?"
"Jesus, thanks for the notice!"
"A different day then! But we are not leaving it to the last minute like you always do!"
"No, no, it's fine, Luce. Mum's gone full clean mode anyway so it gives me an excuse to get out the house. Make my siblings do the work."
"Aren't you worried about your own room coming under fire?"
"Nope. We did mine yesterday, so I know I'm safe. I'll meet you at yours in twenty minutes?"
"Yeah, alright." They hung up and Y/n rushed downstairs, grabbing her bag and coat and pulling her shoes on, and within a few minutes she was yelling to her parents that she'd be back later and laughing at her siblings when they complained about her leaving them to their mother's cleaning fury.
~~~
"So," Y/n started, her tone supposedly disinterested as she, Lucy and Holly browsed the department store racks for something for the two agents to wear. "Who is it? The person you're dressing up for?"
"Oi, quit it." Lucy sent a glare her way, but it was too late. Holly had overheard and was joining in, and for once Y/n was glad that it wasn't her being questioned about a crush.
"Are we talking about Maya?"
"No," Lucy shot back, far too quickly for it to be the truth, and her rapidly reddening cheeks weren't helping either.
"Is that her name? Oh my god, okay! Wait, what do you know about her, Holly?"
"She hasn't told you anything? Okay, okay, so she's called Maya, works at Fittes which isn't brilliant, but she's sweet enough. Lucy totally wrecked her first impression though, which was hilarious."
"It was not! I looked like an idiot!" Lucy now had her face in her hands, and Holly had moved to link arms with Y/n. It turned out that Lucy had quite literally fallen for this girl after tripping on a kerb when staring at her, and Holly had laughed so hard she had to dash to a nearby toilet.
"Yeah, no, that is hilarious, Luce," Y/n cackled, gaining some glares from other shoppers.
"You can't talk, little miss 'I sat on Lockwood's lap and fucking yelped'!" Y/n opened her mouth in protest, looking to Holly for support, but the girl only shook her head and sided with Lucy again.
"I didn't think anybody heard that," she mumbled, mortified that apparently they had heard, and worse, hadn't forgotten.
"Oh we all heard, trust me."
"Ugh, I thought I was free because Lucy has a crush now!"
"Nope. Neither of you are off the hook," Holly declared as she laughed, and Y/n and Lucy shared a look. "Why did you yelp, anyway?"
"I was surprised, okay?"
"Did he have a flare in his pocket?" Lucy snickered with an exaggerated wink, and Y/n whacked her arm.
"No, he did not! You are ridiculous! He just... pulled me backwards into a hug, and it surprised me," she explained, voice higher than usual.
"Right... okay," Holly said, playfully narrowing her eyes. "Whatever you say!"
"I'm telling the truth!" Y/n called after them as they moved on, and she rushed to catch up.
~~~
"Oh, this store is so much better than that last one, look at the range!"
"Holly, have you ever considered working in retail if you stop being an agent?"
"God no, have you heard the horror stories? No thank you."
They were wandering around the third department store of the day when Lucy gasped loudly and practically ran to a rack of clothes.
"This one. This is the one. Oh, look at it! No, no way! It has pockets?! I am in love, and I can die happy!"
"Lucy, what are you actually talking about? Because we can't see it from here," Y/n said, and Lucy turned around with a wide smile on her face as she held up the dress. It was similar to the one she'd worn a while ago, back before Holly had joined and Lockwood and Co were into theft (they needed a book from the Black Library), but Lucy had wanted a new one given the other was slightly worse for wear.
"Oh, Lucy, it's gorgeous," Holly complimented, and Y/n agreed.
"Yeah, seriously Luce. Go and try it on!"
They ushered her into the changing rooms, and while they were waiting Holly and Y/n had a seat on the chairs nearby.
"What are you going to wear?" Holly asked, and Y/n frowned in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"To the ball? What are you going to wear? You are coming with us, aren't you?"
"Uh, I guess I can. I hadn't thought about it, to be honest. I don't think I have anything suitable to wear though."
"Well we've still got time, we can look around for something! Maybe something that will help you confess?" Holly nudged, and Y/n was just about to stop spluttering in protest and defend herself when Lucy walked out.
"Holy shit, Lucy."
"Yeah, holy shit."
"'Holy shit' in a good way or 'holy shit' in a bad way?" she asked, chewing on her lip and smoothing out the fabric.
"Good way," Y/n and Holly replied instantly.
"You look amazing, Luce, honestly," Y/n smiled, and Lucy returned it.
"Definitely that one," Holly agreed.
~~~
Holly had insisted that they keep looking around the store for something for Y/n (Lucy had agreed with Holly that Y/n 'shall go to the ball!' - she'd even declared it like the fairy godmother), and so they spent the next few hours carrying out the same painful process that they had just done with Lucy.
"Y/n? Is that you? It is!"
Y/n froze at the voice, squeezing her eyes shut in the hopes that if she just kept walking then she would be left alone.
"Y/n!"
No chance of that, then, given she'd been taken by the arm and wrapped in a hug that was entirely too fake and smelt incredibly strongly of perfume.
"Steph, hi," Y/n hoped she didn't sound too displeased to see the girl, but then again they'd never been friends, and Steph had always been a bitch to her.
"What are you doing here? I didn't think shopping was your..." she waved her hands at Y/n, "thing." She glanced up and down Y/n's body, raising her eyebrows slightly and smiling too widely.
"Not really, but I prefer it when I'm with my friends and they wanted to go out," she said, trying to figure out an escape route.
"Oh, so you're not getting anything?" Before Y/n could respond, Steph had already started talking again. "Of course you aren't, you couldn't afford it, what with your family having so many people in it."
"Who the hell do you think you are?"
"Lucy, please don't," Y/n hissed, trying to deter her friend from beating the shit out of her enemy.
"You have no right to talk to her like that, okay? And for your information, she is getting something, and it's going to be a dress that makes her look like the goddess she is, alright? So take your fake brands and irrelevant opinions and shove 'em up your arse!" Lucy ranted, shoving her finger in Steph's direction to emphasise her points. The girl was taken aback for a moment, blinking in shock, then scoffed.
"Whatever. Enjoy your lame dress, Karim. Or whatever your last name is, since we all know that you're adopted." Steph left, her two companions following with a click of their stupidly high heels, and Y/n felt tears start to prick at the corners of her eyes. Lucy was practically growling after them, and Holly had brought Y/n into a proper hug, tight and comforting.
"Well she's a bitch. How d'you know her?"
"School," Y/n sniffed, trying to prevent the tears from falling. "She never liked me for some reason, or maybe I was just easy to pick on because I don't know who my real parents are, but she always made it a point to single me out."
"Right, if she ever comes back I'm punching her."
"Lucy," Y/n berated, although she was laughing a little as she did so.
"I mean it! She's awful! Now, have we looked everywhere in this store?"
"I think so, let's try the next one," Holly said.
"Guys, it's not a big deal, really. Don't let me take up more of your time."
"Y/n, stop being ridiculous. We are finding you a dress and that's that."
"Lucy," Y/n whined as the girl grabbed hold of her arm, Holly taking the other, and led her off out of the store.
~~~
"This one?"
"Hm? No, I don't think so."
"What about this one?"
"God no, I'd look like shit."
"How about-"
"Ew, nope."
Many of their discussions had continued in this manner since leaving the store where Steph had appeared, and Y/n was still trying to find a dress that she loved. There had been many that had looked great, but when she'd tried them on there was something just not quite right, and she'd taken it off with a sigh. Curfew was starting to creep up on the three of them, and Y/n was worried that she'd never find an outfit and have to either go in a potato sack or just not go at all.
"You'll find something, Y/n," Holly said, nudging her shoulder against Y/n's.
"It's not looking very likely though, is it?" Holly didn't say anything, offering a sympathetic smile instead.
"Oh. My. God. Y/n/n, what about this one?" Lucy shouted from across the store (the last one that they hadn't previously looked around). Y/n and Holly giggled at their friend's antics, walking over to see what she wanted them to see. She was holding up a deep red dress, gaping at it with her eyes wide and mouth hanging open like she was a fish. "Ok. No thinking, no questioning, find the dressing room and put this on." Lucy bundled the dress into Y/n's arms and then shoved her in the direction of the changing rooms.
"You sure about this one, Lucy?"
"I'm positive, Holly."
~~~
The two agents were waiting outside for Y/n to appear when George turned up.
"What are you two doing here? Lucy, haven't you already got a dress?"
"Oh, hi George. Yeah, I got one earlier since my other nice dress is kind of old now, but Y/n's trying one on. Why are you here?"
"Apparently my other suit isn't nice enough, so I had to get a new one. Lucky that we've been getting some high paying customers recently that I could afford it."
"When you say your 'other suit', do you mean the one that has plasm stains and holes in it from moths?"
"...Yes."
"She's been in there a while, do you think she needs help?" Holly said after a lull in Lucy and George's conversation.
"I'm fine! Gimme two seconds!" Y/n shouted, and Lucy snickered.
"Wait, why's she trying on a dress?" George frowned, finally registering the fact that his sister was in the changing room.
"Because she's coming with us to the Fittes Ball in a couple of weeks and this girl was being a bitch-"
"Stephanie?"
"Uh- yeah. How'd you know?"
"Y/n complains about her a lot. I think they're arch enemies or something."
"Oh."
"What's she got to do with finding a dress though? Attending the ball makes sense, but where does Steph come into this?"
"Lucy might have shouted that Y/n was going to get a dress that made her look like a goddess," Holly chimed in.
"Ah, I see. So now my sister is... what, trying one on?"
"Yep. You sure you're okay?" Lucy shouted the last part in the direction of a stall, just as Y/n swept back the curtain and stepped out.
"Woah," Lucy and Holly said. George was silent, staring at his sister.
"Good woah or bad woah?" Y/n asked, smiling a little as she remembered Lucy asking a similar thing earlier that day.
"Good woah, for sure," Holly said, Lucy nodding next to her.
"Oh, Georgie. I didn't know you were here," Y/n looked more nervous now, clearly wanting her brother to say something positive.
"Do you like it?" he asked.
"Yeah. I do. I really do."
"You look beautiful, Y/n/n."
"Thank you, Georgie."
"Definitely look like a goddess," Lucy added.
~~~
"Lockwood, hi!" Y/n hadn't expected to see him today, but he had just entered the small cafe that she worked in.
"Hi, Y/n/n, how're you?" He looked antsy, like he wanted to know something, and was shifting on his feet.
"I'm alright... you okay? You look like you have a rash," she said, starting to make him a tea the way she knew he liked it.
"Uh- what? No, I don't... I don't have a rash, I just, well, I heard that you're coming to the ball with us next week?"
"Oh, yeah. The girls convinced me to go. We went dress shopping for Lucy last week and Holly told me I should go with you all. You don't mind, do you?"
"No! No, of course I don't mind!"
"Good, 'cause I already got a dress when Lucy got hers, and it was expensive and I need a justification for getting it or Mum'll be mad." She poured the hot water in, careful not to spill any over her hands (it had happened more times today than she'd like to admit), turning and finishing the tea off, placing a lid on the top of the take away cup. She pushed it across the counter, shaking her head when Lockwood pulled out his wallet to pay. "On the house, you look like you need it." He smiled at her, making her heart flutter, and pushed a fiver into the tip jar next to her as he ignored her protests.
"Thank you. Are you going to get changed with the rest of us? Or do you want us to pick you up from yours?"
"Oh, I was gonna get changed with Holly and Lucy. I'll probably come over quite early if that's alright with you?"
"Of course, you know I don't mind having you over, love. Thanks for the tea!" he called out as he left, unaware of Y/n's blush.
~~~
"Why do girls take so long getting ready for things?"
Lockwood looked up at George's words as he entered the kitchen, folding his paper and throwing it on the table. "Not sure. I'm relatively sure they plan world domination while they do it."
"Makes sense," George shrugged, flopping into a chair and pulling at his bow tie. "They have been in Lucy's room for hours now though. Do you think we need to be worried?"
"I hear them laughing every now and then, so they're still alive at least," Lockwood replied. George hummed, pushing his glasses back up his nose. All of a sudden the two boys heard footsteps thundering on the stairs, and a moment later Lucy's head poked through the kitchen door.
"Please make your way into the hall!" she half shouted, not caring that she was only a few metres away from them and disappearing again. Lockwood and George shared a look, then slowly pushed themselves out of their chairs and moved into the hallway to stand in front of the stairs. A few minutes passed, with hushed conversation barely audible from the top of the stairs, and eventually Holly said "Oh, I'll go!" and came downstairs. She looked lovely in her dress, gold fabric shimmering as she took the steps and ended up at the bottom, Lucy following closely behind in her deep blue (a staple colour for the girl), also looking gorgeous. Lockwood frowned slightly when he realised that Y/n wasn't with them, and when her head poked over the bannister with a worried expression he started feeling nervous.
"Guys, are you sure?" she asked, biting her lip. Lucy and Holly nodded, and George gave her a thumbs up.
"Wait," Lockwood started. "Has everybody seen her dress but me?"
"Yep," George said, the girls nodding behind him.
"So why are you so nervous, Y/n/n?" he called up, frowning.
"I don't know!"
"Just come downstairs!" A loud honk sounded from outside then, and the four agents turned to look in the direction of the sound.
"That'll be the cab," Lucy piped up, heading over to the door. "We'll wait for you two," she winked, and Lockwood felt his face heat up. How did she know about his feelings for Y/n?
"Please don't break her heart, Lockwood. Or I'll deliberately throw badly the next time we're on a case."
"George, no offence, but you can't aim anyway. Maybe if you deliberately aimed badly you'd throw it the right way."
"I mean it. Remember what we talked about the other week, and don't screw it up, yeah?" George patted Lockwood's shoulder, grabbing his jacket and heading outside after the girls.
"Lockwood?"
"Yeah?"
"They've all left, haven't they?"
"Yeah." Y/n didn't answer, instead letting out a groan that made Lockwood chuckle.
"Just come downstairs, Y/n/n. We're going to be late."
"Promise you'll be nice?"
"Why would I not be nice?"
"I don't know! Just promise?"
"Okay! I promise!" He was trying to stifle his laughter in the hopes that she wouldn't take it the wrong way when Y/n appeared at the top of the landing and took his breath away. She was stunning, the dress fitting perfectly and making her look ethereal.
"Lockwood? I look terrible, don't I? I'll stay here, you guys go without me-"
"No! No, don't... you look... you look- pretty," he settled on, wincing at his awkwardness. "You look really pretty, Y/n." He didn't miss the way her smile grew, or the way his face warmed, and when she muttered a small 'Thanks' under her breath his heart stuttered. "We should, uh," he cleared his throat. "We should probably... go..." he trailed off, still blushing. She had come closer and now he could smell her perfume, and when she brushed past him to open the door he thought he might faint from the brief physical contact. What was wrong with him? He was Anthony bloody Lockwood, so why was he acting so foolishly around this girl?
"Are you coming, then? Or are you gonna keep standing there like a lemon?"
"Uh, yeah, I'm- yep."
They packed themselves into the taxi, Lockwood stubbornly ignoring Lucy's smirk as the last two available seats for him and Y/n were right next to each other (which he was entirely certain had been planned), thighs pressed together, and a few moments later they were on the road, heading for the Fittes building.
~~~
"Holy shit, this is insane, Lucy," Y/n gasped, staring around the room in wonder. "Lucy?" She looked for her friend, wondering why she hadn't said anything in response, when she saw Lucy talking to a girl.
"That's Maya," Holly whispered, taking Y/n's arm and looping it through her own.
"God, she's gorgeous. I can see why Lucy likes her." Holly hummed her agreement, taking the two of them on a lap of the room.
"Did something happen between you and Lockwood before you got in the taxi?" she asked after a pause.
"What? No, why?" Y/n's eyes were wide, heat creeping up her neck at the memory of him calling her pretty.
"He can't stop staring at you. He looks like an idiot, to be completely honest." Now her eyes were wide for a different reason, turning to find Lockwood's body in the crowd. Sure enough, he was already looking their way, and after a few moments he seemed to realise that he'd been caught, blushing and rejoining the conversation he was having with George and some agent from Rotwell.
"You sure nothing happened?" Holly asked again, eyebrow raised.
"...Yep." The other girl just laughed, clearly not believing her, and dragged her further around the room.
~~~
"You alright, Luce?"
"Not really," she said, slumping into the chair next to Y/n. "Maya's talking to some other girl and I couldn't relate to anything they were saying, so I left."
"Aw, Lucy. You have been talking to her for what, an hour already? You're not going to have everything in common," Y/n reassured her friend, offering a soft smile.
"I s'pose you're right," she started. "That's what makes a good relationship, right?" Lucy was perking up with every word, sitting up in her chair and leaning forward.
"Yeah, like Y/n and Lockwood," Holly chimed in.
"Yeah, Holly's right. Wait, like- what?! What do you mean?! We're not- he's not-" Y/n spluttered, trying desperately to gain control of the situation after the slip-up and failing miserably. Lucy and Holly were doubled over laughing, clearly finding the situation hilarious, when all of a sudden Y/n shot her arms out to either side, grabbing hold of her friends. "No, seriously, stop it now. Look," she pointed towards Lockwood, hoping the girls would pick up on what was wrong.
"Is that-?"
"I'm gonna kick her arse into next fucking we-"
"Fucking Stephanie," Y/n spat, not missing the way that she was flirting with Lockwood. She hadn't realised the bitch was here, but now that she had it was incredibly difficult to take her eyes off of the scene. Now it was her turn to be gloomy, and every attempt to talk to Lockwood ended with Steph's friends (minions) pushing her back and acting like incredibly non-threatening bodyguards, but Y/n didn't want to cause a scene in the middle of a party that she wasn't technically invited to by shoving back.
Roughly an hour and a half after first spotting Stephanie with Lockwood, Y/n was stood with her back to a wall as she miserably looked on at the two of them somehow still engaged in conversation. The worst part was, Steph didn't look like she would be ending their chat anytime soon, and didn't appear to want to leave. Whether the girl knew about his affiliation with Y/n or not, she wasn't sure, but it was making Y/n increasingly more irritated as the night went on.
"Here," Lucy said, appearing at Y/n's side. "Take this." She held her hand out, one of her rings that she always wore sat in the centre of her palm, the sapphire shining up at her from its place in the centre of the band of silver.
"Uh, why?" A frown settled on Y/n's face, unsure where Lucy's mind was going.
"Because you're gonna go up to Lockwood, big smile on your face, and ask Steph why she's fondling your husband." Y/n could only stare at her friend, wondering what the actual hell had come over her.
"But... he's not my husband?"
"She doesn't need to know that, does she? You two are practically an old married couple anyway, so what does it matter? Besides, if nothing else it's an opportunity to cuddle up to him," she said the last part with a wink, making Y/n flush as she remembered the last time she had 'cuddled up' to Lockwood.
"Well, George is over there, he's not going to play along, is he?" she attempted to find a way out of this situation that Lucy had put her in, but the agent had a solution to everything, it seemed.
"Oh, I told him about this. He's promised to go with it. There was absolutely no way I was gonna let your brother be oblivious, he's a terrible liar sometimes." Lucy was still standing with her hand out, ring gleaming up at Y/n, and she had half a mind to say no and continue suffering until she heard a loud laugh come from the other side of the room. Both girls looked for the source, and Y/n bristled when she realised that it was Steph laughing, hand placed firmly on Lockwood's arm as she leaned into him. Not thinking twice, Y/n grabbed the ring, shoved it on her finger, and marched over to where her new fake husband stood. She squeezed between Steph and Lockwood (difficult, since the other girl had practically glued herself to him) and wrapped her arms around his waist, trying to steady her heart as she felt his warmth engulf her.
"Hi, love," she smiled up at him, willing him to stop staring at her with his eyes so wide open in shock and hug her back. He stuttered for a moment, going red, and vaguely Y/n registered Steph's outraged expression in the corner of her eye and George's stifled laughter.
"Uh- hi- hello."
"Y/n? I didn't realise you were going to be here," Steph asked through gritted teeth, obviously annoyed at the interruption.
"Oh, Steph! I didn't see you there! Of course I'm here, why wouldn't I be? My husband got invited and so naturally I was his plus one!" It was petty, she knew, but totally worth it for the look on Steph's face when Y/n emphasised the word 'husband' while smiling lovingly up at Lockwood.
"...Husband?" she asked, eyes flicking back and forth between the two of them. Lockwood was still rigid as a pole, although he had brought his arms around Y/n's waist after she pinched him in the side. He leaned in to whisper in her ear.
"I second that. Husband?"
"Oh, did I not tell you?" Lockwood hadn't moved his head away from her ear, instead nuzzling further into her neck, and it was becoming difficult to think straight. "We got married!" She flashed the ring at Steph, delighting in both the pure, unfiltered shock on her face and also the way in which Lockwood had moved his hands to hold her body closer to his.
"Well- I- okay then. But one question, for Lockwood?" He pulled his head up, dopey smile on his face as he nodded for Steph to continue.
"Why would you ever marry someone like her? I mean, you know that she's adopted, right?"
Y/n could practically feel George bristle behind her and get ready to punch Steph's lights out, but Lockwood remained calm, his expression sharpening and spine straightening as he took Steph in.
"I don't see how her not being biologically related to her parents affects how much I love her, do you?"
"It's just that-"
"I married Y/n because of who she is, not because of her family, although having George around is wonderful," Lockwood cast a smile at Y/n's brother before continuing. "She's the most incredible person I have ever met, and she far outshines you in every way and I think you know that, and you're jealous of it. I know that I'm jealous of how incredible you are, darling," he turned to Y/n, using the hand that wasn't around her waist to push back a lock of hair, his fingers lingering for a few moments more than was necessary as he smiled softly at her. "And quite honestly, Steph, if you can't agree with me on that then I don't think we have anything else to talk about, do we?" It was a rhetorical question, Lockwood already turning away and linking his hand with Y/n's as he dragged her to the side of the room, but they could hear Steph spluttering being them as they went.
"So," he started once they were far enough away. "What was that all about?" He hadn't let go of her hand, and his thumb had started softly tracing patterns over their intertwined fingers.
"What?"
"I don't remember marrying you, Y/n, unless it happened when I was really drunk or sleep deprived," he joked, although something in his eyes was searching for any hint of truth to the words in her face.
"I just- she's- I-" Y/n took a breath, trying to figure out how to explain the whole thing to him without him getting mad or laughing at her. "Steph's always hated me, and Lucy knows that-"
"What's Lucy got to do with this?" She huffed at him, small frown appearing on her face.
"If you let me finish then you'd know!"
"Alright! Alright!"
"Yeah, so Lucy knows that Steph hates me, and I hate her, and you two were talking for so long and she was all over you and I couldn't keep watching, so Lucy gave me this ring that I think is actually one of mine that she stole," she frowned down at her hand, going off on a tangent, "and she told me I should go over and say we were married to get rid of Steph."
Lockwood didn't say anything, instead just staring at her with a blank expression, and Y/n looked down at their still linked hands.
"I'm sorry," she whispered after a while.
"Don't be," he whispered back, using his free hand to lift her chin up. "I'm just a little annoyed, to be honest."
"Oh, god, I really am sorry, Lockwood! I didn't mean to make you upset or anything, I just got pissed off with her and-"
"No! No no no, stop right there. I'm not annoyed at you, darling, never you. I'm annoyed at myself for not coming up with that plan earlier. She was really starting to piss me off too, and I kept hoping that George would intervene or something and he never did- I'm going to have to talk to him about that," Lockwood frowned, looking in her brother's direction. "I'm also... I'm annoyed that this is how I tell you that-"
"Here you are! I was wondering where you two had run off to!" George appeared, bright smile on his face, and Y/n couldn't stop the glare that came onto her face. Tell me what? If only George had turned up a few moments later, then she would know what Lockwood wanted to say. "We should probably find the others, party's wrapping up now and I'm craving my bed." Lockwood heaved a sigh, then nodded in agreement, following after George as her brother tried to find Lucy and Holly, casting a slightly pained glance over his shoulder at Y/n.
Tell me what?!
~~~
The journey back to Portland Row was uneventful since everybody was exhausted, although Lucy was practically buzzing in her seat because Maya had passed on her number, telling Lucy to call her.
"This means something, right?" she exclaimed as they piled through the front door. "I have a real chance with her, don't I?"
"Yes, Lucy. Yes you do," Y/n yawned, leaning slightly on Lockwood to take her heels off. Why she'd ever let Holly convince her that heels were needed when she could have worn her trainers instead she wasn't sure, but she breathed a sigh of relief when the first one was finally off. She wobbled for a moment trying to undo the strap on the other one when Lockwood steadied her, crouched down, and took her leg into his hands as his fingers worked the clasp. A few moments later he was done, gently pulling the shoe off of her foot, and although he had only had his hands on her for what couldn't have been more than ten seconds Y/n could feel her cheeks heating up and her heart beating faster.
"Lockwood, what the fuck are you doing?"
"George, they're having a moment, alright? Leave 'em alone," Lucy hissed, taking him by the arm and dragging him upstairs, hushed apologies whispered as he tripped and face planted due to her harsh tugging.
"Good night you two, I'll see you in the morning," Holly said, following after her coworkers and leaving Y/n and Lockwood in the entrance hall alone for the second time in the last twenty-four hours.
"You're not going to bed, are you?" Y/n asked, a knowing smile on her face as she looked at Lockwood. He shrugged, heading towards the library instead of up the stairs.
"I'm not feeling too tired, to be honest," he replied.
"You never feel tired, I swear. Do you ever sleep?" She mock gasped. "Are you a vampire? Is that why you're so pale and are always awake at night?" She broke off into a fit of giggles, exhaustion making her mildly hyper.
"No, I am not a vampire," Lockwood laughed, shaking his head at her antics. "Go on, you should head up. Unlike me you can't run on tea and tea alone."
Y/n nodded, heading for the stairs, but stopped a little way up as she remembered something. "Lockwood?"
He paused in the doorway of the library, turning to face her with one hand still on the handle. "Yeah?"
"What were you gonna tell me before George came over? At the ball? You said you were annoyed that it took you so long to tell me something." A frown had worked its way onto her face, but Lockwood's was filled with a smile.
"Go to bed, darling. I'll see you in the morning." He disappeared into the library, leaving Y/n standing on the staircase staring at the place he had just been.
~~~
The next morning Y/n woke to an empty room, Lucy and Holly nowhere to be seen in the attic. She laid in bed for a little while, soaking in not having to get up and go to work, but eventually the need for food grew too strong and she was forced to start her day.
The kitchen was empty of George, too, and a short investigation led to finding a scribbled note on the thinking cloth that Holly, Lucy and George had gone for a grocery run at the supermarket. That left Lockwood, who was either hiding away in the house or had gone off on his own somewhere. Y/n's question was answered a few minutes later as she was pouring hot water into a mug for tea, and she nearly spilled the liquid all over her hands when Lockwood appeared and asked her to pour a cup for him.
"Shitting hell, Lockwood! Where did you come from?"
"Oh, I was downstairs. Doing a spot of rapier practice. Thanks," he gratefully accepted the mug that Y/n handed him, smiling brightly at her over the edge. She tried desperately to ignore the flush to his skin (and the mental images of Lockwood training), and turned back to her own mug of tea, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment in the hopes that she could go back to thinking normal thoughts. "You alright?"
"Hm? Oh, yes! Yeah, yep. I'm fine," she exclaimed, wincing at how the words came out. Lockwood stifled a snort (unsuccessfully) and took a sip of tea, yelping a moment later.
"Shit, that's hot!"
"Why wouldn't it be? You idiot!" Y/n was laughing fully, not bothering to hide how amusing she found the whole situation, and Lockwood was glaring at her from where he stood fanning his mouth. "You literally watched me pour boiling water into that like, a minute ago!"
"I know! I know! Stop laughing, will you? I feel bullied. I'm being bullied."
He took a glass out of the cupboard, filling it up with cold water from the tap and taking a long drink. They stood in silence for a while after that, Lockwood taking tentative sips of his tea while Y/n took large gulps, trying not to laugh at him when the memory of his reaction came back. They were very rarely alone in the house, with at least one other person somewhere and about to walk in, and Y/n decided that Lockwood had nowhere to go so she might as well corner him.
"Why didn't you answer me last night? When I asked what you wanted to tell me?"
He froze momentarily, the tips of his ears going pink as he hid behind his mug and scratched at the back of his head. "It doesn't matter, Y/n/n. Really."
"Well it matters to me, Lockwood. If nothing else the not knowing is killing me. Also I had just dragged you into a marriage with me, and while I do feel bad about that I also feel that you owe me this as well."
"You didn't drag me into a marriage, you surprised me with one," he joked, clearly stalling.
"Okay, fine, but seriously what were you going to say before my idiot brother came over?"
"I was just... going to say that..." he mumbled the last part, all the words smushed together and said quietly so that Y/n had trouble picking them out.
"Sorry, I genuinely could not hear you for the life of me Lockwood," her expression was apologetic, and he sighed through his nose as he looked up at the ceiling, closing his eyes before making a decision.
"I was going to say that I was annoyed that it took me so long to tell you that I love you."
"I love you too, Lockwood," Y/n frowned, wondering why he looked so beaten up about it. The five of them often told each other that they loved them, the words thrown around casually all the time.
"No, I mean- I love you, Y/n. To the point that George punches me in the arm sometimes because I won't shut up about how amazing or funny or kind or smart you are."
"Oh."
"Yeah." He hesitated for a few seconds, then spoke up again. "If you don't... I don't want this to ruin our friendship if you don't feel the same way though."
"Why wouldn't I feel the same?"
"You haven't said anything and it's- it's freaking me out!"
"Well I do feel the same! I'm just also freaking out because you love me too!"
"We're a mess, aren't we?" Lockwood laughed.
"Absolutely."
"So- So if I asked you on a date... would you-"
"Yes. Sorry, I- you can finish."
"I mean I think I got my answer, to be honest." He smiled softly at Y/n, placing his mug down and slowly coming over to where she leaned against the countertop. She reached her arms up and draped them around his neck, bringing him into a hug, and his own hands found their way to her waist. His eyes flicked between hers and her lips, and then he was whispering "Can I kiss you?" and leaning in when she nodded, pressing his lips to hers gently. They didn't rush, taking their time as they kissed softly, Lockwood's fingers brushing the skin just under her jumper and Y/n's fingers tangling in his hair, and when they pulled away for air they stayed close, foreheads bumping against each other.
~~~
When Holly, Lucy and George got home just over an hour later, arms laden with shopping bags, the silence was deafening.
"I really hope they haven't killed each other," Holly frowned, peering up the stairs as if doing so would help her find their missing friends.
"Maybe they've finally got together and are on a date," Lucy exclaimed, poking George in the side when he wouldn't move out of the way of the cupboard that she needed to open.
"Ow! I'm torn about that. On the one hand if they do get together I'll be glad they've stopped pining, on the other they'll be insufferable. You know what Lockwood's like, all lovey-dovey and attention giving, and Y/n will soak it up like a dry sponge."
"Oh, I found them!" Holly poked her head through the kitchen door, neither Lucy or George having noticed her leave. She lead them to the library, motioning for quiet as she pushed the door open. "They must have been reading and got tired. They totally confessed, just look at them!"
Lockwood and Y/n were curled up (somehow) on the larger of the two armchairs in the library, limbs entangled and hanging off of the arms and a book dangled in Lockwood's free hand, the other wrapped around Y/n keeping her safely tucked into his chest as the two of them slept. George looked like he was trying to be upset, but Lucy could see the smile he was holding off at the sight in front of them.
"We should leave them to it, I s'pose," Lucy murmured, pulling the door shut softly with a small click. "You alright, George?"
"Just thinking about how horrible things will be with them finally together," he replied, rolling his eyes and heading back into the kitchen to start dinner.
"He's not really upset, is he," Holly said, more stating it as a fact than posing a question.
"Nope. He's gonna be singing while he cooks, I can guarantee it."
Sure enough, barely five seconds after Lucy said the words, singing could be heard from behind the closed kitchen door alongside the clash of pots and pans.
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linskywords · 6 months
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Hockey RPF Recs from 2023
I realized recently that I haven't done a great job keeping up with hockey fic beyond the authors I was already subscribed to, so I did some reading in the tag for the past year (and of course fell in a hole and neglected other parts of my life, you know the drill). Mattdrai is even bigger than I thought?? (She said, having been living under a rock.) Also, wow, *amazing* writers out there I had no idea about! Here are my favorites of the stories I've read so far:
so is the longing by dogjuice (mattdrai): This one might win as my favorite fic of the year. You know how sometimes you read something that's not quite as well written as you want it to be but it's doing the thing you want so you read it anyway? This is NOT that fic. It hits such good juicy trope buttons and also is clever and hilariously written. Top marks.
i'll tell you when to stop by dogjuice (mcmattdrai): Sadly this is the only other fic dogjuice has posted, but it is also excellent. The premise could be ridiculous in someone else's hands but rings so true. I was on tenterhooks for it all to work out.
In From the Cold by makeit_takeit (TK/Patty): FERAL. OVER. THIS. All three stories in this (loosely related) series are impeccable, but this one gave me the most feels. I am weak for a repressed closeted character gradually discovering happiness, and the depth of characterization is breathtaking.
Baby, I'm a Wildcard by wearemany (mattdrai): The writing!! This fic is mostly developing/established relationship, which is not usually my fave, but somehow I loved the entire thing?? Just really compelling character-focused writing that had me completely absorbed without needing to rely on angst or drama (much as I love those in other stories).
Edmonton 10 by Helenish (mattdrai): Helenish is incomparable. I cannot express how happy I am that they've (she's?) gotten into hockey lately. Read everything; I don't even know if this is the best one because I *am* subscribed to them so I read the stories as they came out and didn't rank them or anything, but this one is excellent and also you can't go wrong.
this must be the place by rafting (Jamie/Trevor): Love me some sexuality exploration. The USNTDP ensemble was so vividly and delightfully present in this one. Also, Trevor is so dumb. How can you not love it.
let me look at you by isozyme (mattdrai, mcmattdrai): This one is emotionally ROUGH but so well done. Heed the warnings, but there's plenty of emotional satisfaction as well. I read it several weeks ago and it's still living in my head.
roughed up in the afterglow by notthequiettype (mattdrai): This one is pretty short but gets a lot done in not too many words. Really excellent character interactions and dialogue.
linger by bropunzeling (mattdrai): Top-notch A/B/O content. Sometimes you just want Matthew to have heat sex with Leon and pretend not to have feelings until he can't anymore.
in the honey by donderwalk (Jamie/Trevor): Okay it's been a while since I read this one but I remember it as the highlight of my Jamie/Trevor tag search at the time, so I'm gonna say it's probably great. 😄
Serenity in Those Deep Waters by angry_geno_is_score (larsdunn): This mashes the D/s buttons sooooo good. Has it inspired me to write more D/s? Oh yes. Check it out; You Will Have Feels.
how lovely are thy branches by quadratics (mattdrai, Brady/Tim): Hilarious premise, charming execution. This isn't even about characters getting together and yet I loved it.
Hourglass Theory by puckedup (mattdrai): So short, and totally managed to punch me in the chest (in the best way).
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andycupte · 28 days
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Hii, it's been a while...
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I have been pretty busy and a lot has happened
I don't know where to start! I erased a lot already
I want to say thank you for all your kind notes on my drawings!! I even got mentioned by an user who was recommending my art. That made my day back then! I also received two asks. I made this drawing (not finished) to answer one of them.
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Lucaaaas and Clauss ipipipip
I couldn't finish cuz I was trying something that probably was a bit ahead of me. Lost motivation, said i I was going to check it later and then forgot LOL. I'm really sorry. I'm looking foward to answer that question cuz I really liked it.
I dunno if some of you know that I'm doing part of a fanmade Mother magazine. It is already finished and I think they sold copies too. I haven't got mine yet but I'm really happy for it!
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I drew Ninten and Lloyd to promote the countdown! you probably saw it when they posted it! >>Here<<
Uhmm what else can I tell you...
I have been receiving a lot of commissions but I have even been inactive on twitter, I have been attending them in private ; v ;
I joined a facebook latino group about mother where they post memes too. It's been active lately and there is three or maybe four artists that draw funny memes of the kids. It kinda feels like the drawings I made and I feel like I could take out my old notes and check if I could join them too! I just need time. I reaally want to draw again, it made me so happy.
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Here is a drawing of my Oc and mr saturn! its kinda old too. I couldn't bring myself to finish it. Again, I was trying something that was a bit bigger than me.
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This is my most recent drawing! From this year at least. I drew it just as a break from commissions. I have a lot of work to get done. I should rise prices to lower my load ; ;
I'm pretty sure something is slipping my mind--- I guess I will post again!
Excuse if everything looks chaotic and it's hard to read. I have to get back to drawing!
... what are my tags now????????..
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lavandula-ipsum · 4 months
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The rain will hide us
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gif by @tatooineknights
Summary: Stranded on an unkown planet, you've fallen sick. Thankfully, Luke is there with you. However, you might not be the only one in need of care.
Wordcount: 2.3k
Tags: Luke Skywalker x GN!Reader, force sensitive reader, comfort, fluff, mentions of injuries, one-shot. Angst somehow got in.
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The paleness of the morning starts to filtrate through the tent, drawing the dark little spots left by quiet raindrops. Their clatter serves as a gentle wake up call while, outside, an unexplored jungle sleeps.
“How are you feeling?” Before you can even shift in your sleeping bag, Luke has already turned his attention to you, lying a kind hand on your shoulder. For a second, you miss the times when you could have just watched him for a couple of minutes before choosing to signal that you’re awake.
Truth is you feel like shit. A trash compactor could have chewed and spit you out while you were unconscious for all you know. At the effort of answering his question, a raspy whine leaves your sore throat. “Better.”
He’s sitting next to you, not very convinced. There’s urgency tingling the tips of his fingers, you can feel it through the Force. “Is it okay if I check?”
An almost imperceptible shivery note haunts his voice. In the dark circles under his eyes you can sense a long and rough night. You nod. Even though you can feel the last remnants of sickness haven't completely faded from your exhausted body, the back of his hand is warm against your burning cheek and forehead. With an alleviated sigh, Luke finally lets his hand slide down your arm.
“You still have a fever, but it isn’t as high anymore.”
“What happened?”
“Do you remember the crash?”
“A little. I remember the battle, the evacuation when the ship went down.” The mission you embarked on seems to have failed spectacularly. You try to sweep away the thoughts of your fallen comrades, at least till you get back and get to know for sure how many of them are actually gone. “We got into the same escape pod and… this atmosphere messed with the navigation systems, I guess.” You grumble, rubbing the side of your head. “Why don’t I remember much after that?”
“You were trapped in the wreckage for a few minutes. I couldn’t take you out earlier. (Y/N), I’m so sorry. You got some cuts and superficial burns. Perhaps a broken rib.” Oh, so that’s what the bandages are for. And probably why you’ve been stripped down to your standard issue underwear. Suddenly, Luke avoids your gaze and an uncomfortable ripple flutters through the Force, but you’re too distracted frowning at the new scratch across his cheek.
“Did you get hurt?”
“No, I’m fine. But you… You were feverish the whole night.” He continues, bringing the med kit closer to show you a box of painkillers, an empty stim canister, an open tube of pomade, anxious to let you know everything he gave you while you were unconscious.
“It’s ok.” You set your hand over his to stop his nervous tinkering through the med kit. “I trust you, Luke. How many times have we done this? Tell me, what happened next?”
He licks his lips, then looks down at his hands. “You became really sick.”
“I’m sorry. I must have scared you. This is all my fault.” You groan before he can start giving you a thousand reasons why it isn’t. “It really is. I knew I was already sick before the mission. It was just a cold two days ago, but I guess it made me more vulnerable to whatever I caught here.”
Luke shifts closer to you, suddenly alarmed. “Why did you come to this mission then? Why didn’t you say anything?”
You remember those agonizing moments when he didn’t show up at the rendezvous point after the battle of Hoth, gone to Force knows where, while you were left alone wondering if he’d been killed. Turns out he’d just left on his own. It’s not as if he owed you any explanation, you were merely friends. He's fated to go out there and do things so far greater than anything having to do with you. So you tried to slap yourself out of this silly anxiety. After all, the others were gone with the Falcon too, and you had to resign yourself to the faith that they'd be alright. 
And then Luke came back, his body battered and his spirit broken worse than you’d ever seen before or since.
Shyly, you slide your fingers out of your cover. He quickly holds them in between his palms. You’re sure the sky outside the tent would pale in comparison with the intensity of his tired gaze right now, glassy and blue. And yet, all you manage to conjure in response is a lie.
“I wanted to feel useful. The Rebellion needs all the hands it can get.�� 
If he realizes, he doesn’t say anything. He just leans in to warm your cold hand with his breath. Luke might not be a full Jedi just yet, but he can probably sense how tired you are of this game of claiming guilt for everything, of just rambling around the edges of what neither of you feel brave enough to say. He just knows you that inescapably well.
For now, the tent has become quiet, so quiet you can even hear him swallow. After a second of allowing yourself to stare at the muscles of his neck tense up and relax with the motion, you look down and sink your flaming face into the sleeping bag.
Against his advice, you sit up. The chill bites your exposed skin, setting a feverish tremor within your chest. However, you don’t let him make you settle back into the bedding.
“Can I say something without it turning into another exchange of apologies?” you ask. Noticing your sudden eagerness, he nods. However, his hands remain close, as if you were about to collapse. “Thank you for saving my life. Truly.”
He seems about to reply with some excuse, probably minimizing himself once again, but you raise a warning finger along with a threatening expression. It makes him laugh, brighter than he’s laughed in months. It lasts too little for your taste, but at least the smile lingers on his face.
“Ok, you win this one. Now, that pomade needs to be reapplied.”
After taking a panicked second to realize what he’s asking, you turn slightly so he can get better access to the burn, which covers the back of your shoulder and part of your right arm. Luke scooches closer till you’re basically sitting between his legs. You wonder if he notices his warmth setting you aflame, but he seems too busy readying the ointment to even look at you, his eyes half hidden under soft locks of weathered gold. However, a loaded silence falls in the tent, during which you feel the urge to cover your front with the sleeping bag. 
“It’s gonna feel a little cold,” he warns before touching you, his voice barely audible.
You had already made up your mind to behave and not show any sign of discomfort, but you need to turn away to hide your face. Honestly, you’re not sure if it’s the painkillers or the surreal ambience around you, but you swear you’ve never been treated by gentler hands. As they work to spread the medicine, you hold yourself together barely enough to not just let go and plop yourself on his lap. You feel beyond beaten, and over your head a thick cloud keeps your judgment in a state of relaxed lethargy. Truth is his welcoming stance, along with the way his fingers caress your tender skin as he softly talks you through the process, isn’t helping your already lazy resolve.  
“I’m so glad, it doesn’t seem like it got infected. I think there’s a chance it won’t leave a scar once we can get you proper treatment back in the fleet.”
You hum half heartedly in response, doing your best to join in the effort to evade the silence instead of entertaining the thought that you don’t actually want to go back. Because he wouldn’t be with you then. Luke has been avoiding the fleet since Bespin, and you've made up your mind to follow him for as long as he wants you around.
“Have you been awake the whole night? Meditating?”
“Not meditating. Standing guard.”
When he finishes up your new bandages, you hear the rustling of knots coming undone and, right after, you’re covered with Luke’s outer robe. Apparently, your top had to be cut off your body when he first tended to your wounds. As he helps drape the garment around your shoulders and slide your arms into the sleeves careful to not graze your wounds, the warmth it still bears surrounds you. Ah, it smells like him too. 
Luke seems ready to offer an excuse to quiet your concerns over his lack of sleep, but it fizzles out before your demanding frown. A pained flare crosses behind his eyes as his Force signature heats up around you. He doesn’t mean to leave you out of his thoughts, he truly doesn’t. It’s just that lately they’ve been a mess not even he has felt ready to untangle. And, if he’s not ready to talk, you won’t push him. However, this silence is a little needle to your heart, and the jab reaches him when it becomes too painful for you to hide.
“I tried to meditate until I had to give up. I couldn’t find the peace for it. You were trembling and twisting in your sleep, burning with fever… mumbling things.”
“Were they embarrassing?” you joke, trying to lift the mood a little. However, instead of following you down that path, you feel a little tug. He’s lightly pulling at the edge of your sleeve, well, his.
“Don’t leave me. Please, stay.”
The pressure around your wrist makes it sound like an apology. Why? For letting you fall sick? For leaving you behind and going to Dagobah on his own? You’re getting tired of riddles, and you’re already trembling from the effort of sitting up straight. Your hand lands on his shoulder, a gesture that seems to finally break him out of his spiraling thoughts and look at you.
“And you did. You stayed.”
An exhalation later, you’re buried in his chest. It’s hard to tell who initiated the hug when you’re enthralled by how melting into each other makes everything else melt away. Luke’s hands travel down your hair, and you wonder when taking in this soothing became as easy as breathing. Well, not exactly. There needs to be a spell, a certain quietness to the air like the one flooding the tent right now. Melancholy is usually the trigger, the signature to the wordless contract between the two of you that grants you permission to indulge in this kind of comfort. Later you’d usually dream awake about it, lost in the memory of what feels forbidden during the daylight. It aches a little that at least one of you needs to be in some kind of pain to feel allowed this kind of intimacy. 
A sigh brushes against your ear as Luke barely dares to talk in a whisper. “What if I can’t do this?” 
“Don’t worry, the Rebellion knows we’re here, we’ll be out of here in no time…”
“Not that. It’s about-” The words get lost as they’re spilled from his lips. Luke lets out a shaky breath before sinking deeper into your hair. “Everything.”
“It’s okay. I understand.”
“You always do.” 
“And listen, I truly believe there’s a special path ahead of you. A bright one. However, no matter what happens, even if things go wrong, I’ll be here. I mean- we all will. We’ll love you all the same.”
You nuzzle up closer against him, prompting a pleased sigh out of him. 
“I’ve been leaning on you too much.”
You chuckle, “how so? You just saved me in, like, five different ways just during the last twelve hours.”
“What you do is way more difficult.”
A hand cradles your head close to his chest, while his other arm surrounds you. And, as the silence settles once again, you finally feel him relax around you as your hands travel up his back. Through his thin inner tunic, the heartbeat pressed against your cheek allows itself to slow down a little. 
“You take a nap now. I’ll keep watch.”
“You’re hurt,” he complains. “And sick.”
“I’ll have a blaster at hand and wake you up as soon as I hear anything outside, I swear.” You hush him before he can complain. “Do I need you to remind you of your instruction, commander? If you don’t rest you’ll compromise the mission.”
“And what mission is that?”
“Get back to base, safe and sound. And stick together until then.”
Luke brushes your cheek with his thumb, as if to check again if your fever has gone down enough to leave the task to you. “Yeah, I might be able to do that.”
So you get back in the sleeping bag so as to not get cold, and he lays down over it next to you. He does so a bit skittish at first, so you interlock his fingers with yours and guide him down to the most comfortable spot, next to you. Soon, exhaustion defeats any remaining fear and Luke feels brave enough to wrap an arm around you. Soon, sleep has taken him.With your heart coming to a halt, you finally dare to take in his features. Even though a shadow of worry still darkens his brow, his features look softer than you’ve seen lately. It takes you back to those early days in the Rebellion when you weren’t nearly as close, but talking seemed easier. So you stay awake, treasuring every deep breath and the faint rainfall in the background, until the distant buzz of the Millennium Falcon fades the spell away.
link to the source gifset
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burst-of-iridescent · 10 months
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Hi! Just a quick message to say that I love your analysis on Katara and Zuko and their dynamics with each other. I personally love how you place the emphasis on them having their journey towards growth together, but an individual one as well. I've only started watching AtlA two years ago, but reading your remarks during my second rewatch of the show made me appreciate the nuances of their relationship and arc more <3 I was just wondering, because you've made some good Zutara fic recs in the past, which Zutara long fic would you absolutely recommend? Thank you so much!
aww, thank you so much! i haven't read long zutara fics in quite some time actually but off the top of my head here are my favs:
the color of the stars by bluenebulae: yes i know i've recommended this fic a hundred times already but i will continue to do so bc it's SO GOOD. this is a book 3 canon divergence where zutara get captured together on DoBS and need to find their way back to the gaang together and it is just everything.
tempest in a teacup by akaVertigo: if you've been around in zutara fandom for a while, you probably already know this fic but i couldn't not include it. this is an au where katara ends up in the fire nation as a child after her mother's death and she and zuko grow up together. fire nation katara AUs do make me a little suspicious because they can easily be done wrong, but this one does it right and the writing is absolutely stunning so trust me when i say you won't be let down.
zuko's tiny dilemma by boogum: book 1 au where zuko is accidentally turned into a 6 year old (with his 16 year old consciousness) and the gaang ends up having to take care of him. i know that sounds like a weird set-up for romantic zutara but i promise nothing gross happens. it's actually a very funny, sweet and wholesome fic so i strongly encourage that you give it a chance!
the worst prisoner by emletishfish: book 1 au where sokka accidentally kidnaps zuko during the events of the blue spirit, and shenanigans and zutara ensue. this is the funniest zutara fic i have ever read AND there are two more installments in the series so you will be good to go for a long time.
(i couldn't find this fic in my bookmarks at first because my browser logged me out of ao3 and i nearly had a breakdown thinking it was gone forever and texted my friends in full panic mode, so that should tell you how much i adore it.)
once around the sun by eleventy7: i would be deeply remiss in offering fic recommendations if i didn't mention one of the most goated zutara fics of all time. i'll warn you now that though this fic has a happy ending, you should absolutely check the tags or you will be stabbed in the heart halfway through just like i was. the pain is definitely worth it, though.
i hope you enjoy reading these! <3
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whispering-ways · 8 months
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Hello! I was wondering if you could make a Dom!Gyomei x Fem!Hashira!reader smut?
๑✧♡ heart to heart ♡✧๑
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✧ summary: you are a recent hashira who's been assigned on a mission with gyomei
✧ pairing: gyomei himejima x f!reader
✧tags: cursing, fingering (f! receiving), nicknames like baby, sweetheart and daddy
✧ notes: i'm sorry for the delay in fics, but I'm working through all my tasks rn! i've been applying to grad school so i haven't had much time to write •́⁠ ⁠ ⁠‿⁠ ⁠,⁠•̀ but now that's done with, I can start pumping out some more fics ♡ i might write a part two to this with more smut if people like it but idk
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You just finished training and were about to gather your things to relax when you felt a large hand on your shoulder. “Hey there! I couldn't help but notice your impressive training session! As a newcomer, you were quite remarkable! But next time, I feel you should improve your stance and work on....”
“Ugh, there he goes again,” you think, listening to Gyomei list out some improvements you could make to be a better Hashira. You tuned his words out and tried your best not to get irritated, but you couldn’t help it. He was always correcting your technique and giving you advice when you didn’t even ask for it.
You understood that it was probably because you had just recently become a Hashira, but his comments were unneeded in your book. You couldn’t place all the blame on him though; it was Kagaya after all that told his right-hand Hashira to take care of you and ‘help you feel welcome’. Nevertheless, it still pissed you off. It’s not like you didn’t know you needed improvement. It was just him saying it that annoyed you.
You knew you probably should keep an open mind before judging Gyomei. It’s not like he was a bad person; he was a kind and nice person, but something about his holier-than-thou attitude just made all his ‘observations’ come across as patronizing to you. I mean, you never asked for his opinion to begin with. If you needed someone’s opinion, you would just ask Kagaya. You rolled your eyes, wondering when Gyomei would just leave you alone.
“Ah, I regret that I failed to mention it earlier, but Kagaya-sama has entrusted us with a mission. I was initially supposed to undertake it solo, but he believes having both of us together would be advantageous. It seems he has faith in your abilities, but he also believes having me by your side for your first mission could aid in your personal growth,” he said with a hint of a smile. That was new; he never smiled.
“Weird, but you know what, good for him. It wouldn’t hurt to smile once in a fucking while. Crying all the time has got to be making his eyes hurt. But there he goes being patronizing again. You wouldn’t be surprised if Gyomei was the one who really suggested it to Kagaya rather than the other way around.
Regardless, you nodded your head and asked some more details about the mission. He let you know that you both had to set out on your journey at 6 a.m. sharp tomorrow. So you gave him another nod of understanding, hoping that’d indicate you wanted to be left alone. Thankfully he got the message and shortly after walked away, leaving you to spend the rest of the day getting the relaxation you knew you deserved.
You woke up early the next day to pack a bit for the 2 day trip ahead of you. After gathering a few things and putting them into a bag, you headed out to meet Gyomei. Luckily, it didn’t take you long to find him. As you opened your door to see him standing right outside your door. “Jesus, you scared me. Couldn’t you at least knock or something?,” you asked, already annoyed with him.
“Ah, I’m sorry, I’ll make sure to do that next time we go on a mission.”
It was almost cute that he thought you’d want to do another mission with him. You would rather eat a bag of nails for breakfast instead; the only reason you were going on this mission was because you didn’t want to be rude to Kagaya.
You close your door behind you and let out an exasperated sigh, readying yourself for the journey. “Okay, as long as you’re ready, let’s get going then.” Gyomei grabbed a small bag behind him, threw it above his shoulder and said, “That’s the spirit! Starting early is always the best!”
After about 30 minutes of walking, you’d both finally reached the grassy mountain you needed to trek to get to your final destination. You weren’t gonna lie, just the thought of trekking it made you tired, but you needed the mission experience, so you trudged forward.
It didn’t help that Gyomei was so far ahead; it was like he was rubbing in your face how much better he was than you. He stopped for a second to look around, which gave you just enough time to catch up with him. “Can’t you slow down? Your pace is like a giant’s, there’s no fucking way I can keep up,” you exclaim.
“I’m sorry I didn’t realize, sweetheart. I’ll be sure to slow down a bit! Please forgive me!” he said, tears rolling down his face.
“It’s fine, just...let’s get going,” you replied, continuing to walk along the path. You regretted asking him to slow down a couple of minutes later when he tried making small talk by asking millions of questions. If walking way off from you was irritating, then this was just pure hell.
You’re sure he can tell how pissed you are; your tight-lipped smile showed nothing but disdain for all his questions. But he just kept on talking anyway. A few minutes later and after trying to ignore him, you give up and decide to succumb to some small talk. You talked to him for a little bit about the mission, but that didn’t last too long as you noticed a slight drizzle start to cover the mountain.
The two of you started closer to the trees near you, hoping that their large spanning branches would keep you both somewhat dry. All chances of that happening left once the light drizzle turned into a heavy pour. There was no way that you both could continue your journey without getting hurt since the earth beneath you had become absolutely slick with water.
You two decided to wait out the rain and find shelter to keep you both dry for the time being. After what seemed like forever, you finally spot a broken-down house in your periphery and quickly get Gyomei’s attention, dying to get out of the rain as soon as possible.
“Look, there’s a house or something over there,” you say pointing at the building. “Let’s head there and hope the family is hospitable enough to let us stay there for a bit till the sky clears up.” You start walking in the direction of the house without even waiting for a reply from Gyomei, who starts wordlessly walking behind you.
As you get closer to the house, you notice how delipidated it really is. It seemed that no one had lived there in years. Almost all the windows were either cracked or completely broken; dust and cobwebs were littered in each corner of the house.
“Well it’s not a palace but at least it’ll keep us out of the rain,” you said, wiping off some dirt so you could finally sit down. You stretched your legs, sighing in relief, glad to finally catch a break.
You closed your eyes, enjoying the peaceful sound of the rain. The peace didn’t last too long as you heard some rustling noises behind you. You turn around to see Gyomei pull out a sleeping bag from his backpack along with a lantern.
“I think that the rain isn’t going to let up anytime soon, so I’m setting up for the night. I think the best decision is to sleep here tonight and start on our journey tomorrow,” he explains, sitting on his bed. “If you’d like, I can set up your bed as well.”
“It's fine, I didn’t even bring a bed anyway. If we have to sleep here tonight, I’ll just sleep on the floor,” you say, turning around. “Besides, it’ll work out the kinks in my back.”
“Nonsense, I insist you take the sleeping bag then!” Gyomei retorted.
“No I’m fine, you use your bed; you’re the one that brought it. I’ll be fine.”
“If you insist,” he says, continuing to set up. He pulled out some supplies from his bag to light the lantern and in a few moments, the whole house was filled with golden light, making the space as comfy as it could be.
But unfortunately, not even the warmth the lantern brought helped to make the house any less cold. The rain kept pouring and with it came a frigid breeze that swept through all corners of the house.
You tried to keep it discreet but there was no hiding the chattering of your teeth. Gyomei soon picked up on it too. At first, he did his best not to comment; after all, it did seem like you wanted your own space. But his worry for you took over and he yet again asked “Hey, are you sure you don’t want the bed?”
“Ugh..I told you I’m fine. It’s your bed, use your bed,” you replied back, annoyed he kept pressing the issue.
“Are you really fine? I can hear your shivers from here. I know it’s cold and the bed is quite spacious anyway so it wouldn’t be too much trouble at all,” Gyomei said scooting over to offer a spot on the sleeping bag. You couldn’t lie, you were pretty cold so you gave in and agreed to share the bag. You stood up and sat down next to him, leaving ample space between you two.
A few moments pass by with nothing but the sound of rain to fill in the awkward silence between you two. This was soon broken though when Gyomei said “So...what do you think about being a Hashira?
“Jesus fucking Christ, why’d he have to say something,” you thought, internally cringing at the fact that you now had to make small talk. “Uhh..well I guess it's um... good I guess. I don’t really know what to say,” you reply as you look towards the ground and lantern, anywhere besides Gyomei’s face.
“Ah, that’s wonderful! I’m glad you’re having a good start! I hope you like the other Hashira, they are like family to me,” he says, a small smile spreading across his face.
“Oh, cool. That’s always...uhh...real nice I guess,” you say, trying to remain as cold as possible. Your plan was to get him off your back and to leave you alone, but as time passed on, it didn’t seem like you were ever going to shake him off as he told you many stories of the other Hashira.
“I know we must be together for our line of work, but I truly consider all the Hashira my close friends. Or well, at least most of them I think...” he said, trailing off. You couldn’t help but be intrigued at the end of his sentence.
Now you were never one to gossip, but you were definitely a sucker for a bit of tea, and his phrasing definitely showed signs of a bit of tea. I mean Gyomei? Having beef with someone? Unheard of.
“Oh come on, you can’t just drop a statement like that without spilling the tea...” You press,, not prepared to give up. “No details, no good tea.”
You could see Gyomei squirming around a bit, debating whether he should explain or not. After a little bit, he sighs and looks at you, as if preparing himself.
“Okay...it’s just, you, we don’t have that strong of a relationship. I feel like you just don’t like me for some reason and however I look at it, I can’t seem to figure out what I did.”
“Fuck, I should’ve kept my mouth shut,” you thought. You didn’t want to get into this conversation now, not ever really. But you couldn’t just leave him hanging like that. You buried your face in your hands, letting out a long sigh. “It’s not that I don’t like you. I don’t have problems with you.”
“Then what is it because there must’ve been something I did. Everything we talk you just seem tired and annoyed,” Gyomei said.
“Look, I don't hate you, but sometimes it feels like I'm just an inferior version of you. Like, when you're so good at what you do, it's hard to feel like we're on the same level. And sometimes, these little comments you throw at me, even if you don't mean them in a bad way, make me feel like I'm not good enough for us to be equals.
I mean, you're like a prodigy with so much experience. It's hard not to feel like I'm always lagging behind you, you know?" You were doing your best to explain how you felt, but just hearing yourself made it obvious to you that your disdain was immature.
“For me, you’ve always been my equal. You’ve got a solid foundation of abilities and experience that match up with my own. However, things felt pushed too fast for me; I never got the chance to properly settle into being a Hashira. I’m doing my best to get a hang of this new position, but sometimes it’s hard not to feel like I’m falling short of everyone. So I guess in that sense, I really am not your equal,” Gyomei says, looking down to the floor.
There's a quiet gap between you two before you say, "...Yeah, I guess I judged you pretty quickly. I should've been more open to what you had to say, but I wanted to be a perfect Hashira, you know? Taking criticism is just a little hard for me, but I'll work on that in the future." You feel somewhat foolish after talking about how you felt; none of this coldness was really necessary to begin with - your dislike towards Gyomei felt almost useless.
"I apologize if my criticisms appeared more judgmental than I intended. However, in my opinion, you're already perfect like a diamond; you're a Hashira for a reason. Still, all diamonds require a bit of polishing, and that's all I was aiming for - to help you shine with some advice and techniques," he said cheerfully.
You have to admit, that comparison of his got you a little flustered. Yet, its sweetness gave you a lot of comfort. "Let's put this aside and be friends, alright? Let's start all over, and I'm sorry for not giving you a chance earlier," you say with a smile, shocked that you're actually having a conversation with Gyomei like this.
“I’m glad to hear that. It’s nice to see such a beautiful smile on you for the first time.” You look up at him, eyes wider than saucers. “Not that you aren’t pretty all the time...I mean..but you know that.” Gyomei said, red from head to toe.
You chuckle at Gyomei's flustered state, finding it endearing to see the big strong man reduced to a blushing mess. He's truly a sight to behold. "If I said you were a sight for sore eyes, I'd be selling you short," you comment in turn.
Out of nowhere, a gust of cold air hits your body, sending tingles down your spine. "Would you...uhh...like to come a little closer?" Gyomei proposes. "I noticed you shiver and I run pretty warm. I wouldn't mind a platonic cuddle to stay warm, if you're alright with that."
You never thought making up with him would mean that you’d be flirting with him, but you couldn’t complain. I mean he was hot and you wouldn’t mind messing around with him a little bit.
So you scooch a bit closer to him, your arms barely grazing his. He was right, he definitely was warm; you could feel the heat radiating off of him. But that still wasn’t enough to warm you up.
You're somewhat confused when you hear Gyomei laugh. He adjusts his position and spreads his legs apart, as if offering you a spot to sit. "Come, sit a little closer, there's no way you're feeling warm there," he says, patting the area between his legs.
Taken by surprise by his forwardness, you nonetheless place yourself between him, your legs resting against his. It's a little awkward between you, but you aren't one to back down from a challenge, and he IS rather warm.
You’d never really noticed the size difference between you two, but you definitely did now. His muscled thighs surrounds you, practically pressing your own togtether. He stretches back behind you to give you some space. You sit for a little bit and you both kind of sink into the feeling of being so close to him.
Gyomei looks down to you and asks, "Can I help keep you a little warmer?" Hesitant, you nod in agreement - but deep down, you can feel your cheeks get hot just by looking at him. This sudden rush feels like it's moving far too fast for anything meaningful to come out of it, but something about it just feels right.
He suddenly lifts you up and sits down in a cross-legged position, placing you right into his lap. The ease with which he picks you up surprises you, but you're not thinking about warmth at all now.
“How are you feeling now? Warmer?” Gyomei says.
"Yes, this...it feels pretty nice," you answer, leaning your back against his chest. At first, the touch of his hand on your thigh is nice - but once you've settled, it becomes almost...teasing. The warmth is nice, yeah, but enough teasing already, so you decide to make your own move.
You get up from his lap, leaving Gyomei worried he pushed too far. But that feeling dissipated once you sat back on his lap, now facing him with your legs wrapped around him. You looked up at him through your eyelashes to see him absolutely flustered. He puts his hands on your back bringing you closer. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were flirting with me Gyomei.”
He pulls back, a little shocked, but it doesn’t take him long to reply “Hmm... perhaps I am.”
“Oh yeah?”
The sexual tension is practically tangible, but you neither speak nor move as you gaze at his lips. Only your eyes speak; he understands and moves in for a passionate kiss.
The unexpected roughness is a surprise, but a welcome one, as you melt into his embrace and grasp for a hold on his neck, drawing him closer to you, your body flush against his. One hand reaches for his chest, using his necklace to pull him as close as he can be - his hands on your waist, just barely touching your hips.
He deepened the kiss, his tongue running along his own bottom lip, requesting entrance into your mouth. Once you opened your mouth, his tongue enters once more, and the sensation sent a wave of chills down your spine.
You slip your arms around his neck to pull him in closer, your body pressed against his as your skin ignites with a flame of excitement. He pulls you back slightly, exposing your neck to him, before diving in once more to to suck on your neck. You whine out under his touch, squirming with delight beneath him.
He bites down hard, leaving a hickey in his wake. He takes a moment to proudly admire it, only to pull you into his arms, leaving you mildly confused. He suddenly lifted you and placed you against the wall, his arms slamming at either side of you as he began to kiss you again.
Gyomei's hand slides down your side, coming to rest on the back of your knee. He uses his other hand to grab you firmly by your back and pull you in closer. You instinctively wrap your leg around his back, holding on tight now.
His hand departs from its prior position, as he casually caresses your inner thigh, his fingers brushing against your slit. He was taken aback to find that there were panties instead of the anticipated pair of shorts, but hey he wasn’t complaining. His fingers began to play with the edges of your panties, twirling them between his digits.
He eventually pauses and asks, "Are you okay if I go further?" as he begins to tease your slit with his fingers.
You nod wordlessly and he continues to kiss you. Your body trembles in anticipation as Gyomei's tender lips lightly graze yours. He pulls you close, and with a swift gesture, he removes your panties and tosses them to the side. The touch of his fingers sends electric shocks throughout your body.
Your body quivers with anticipation, your heart beating erratically as his lips trail down toward yours. He removes your panties with a swift motion, discarding them carelessly to the side. His skilled fingers lightly tease your clit, eliciting a muffled moan.
His middle finger circles your entrance, before plunging in with no warning. His finger was bigger and thicker than anything you’d ever felt before, so when he added another finger, it nearly overwhelmed you with pleasure.
You feel like your knees are about to give out, but your body can't help but squirm. Gyomei looks at you with a passionate glare. In a frustrated tone, he asks, "Sweetheart, you're gonna have to stop squirming around like that, how am I gonna make you feel good if you do?"
“I’ll do my best...not to~,” you moan out as he continues to relentlessy pound his fingers into your pussy.
“If you want more pleasure, you gotta call me daddy princess.”
"I...I promise not to squirm then daddy," you whine as you try to maintain a firm grip on your promise. However, despite your desperate efforts, you end up squirming more as you near climax.
Gyomei suddenly stops and states, "You're still squirming baby. You can't disobey your promise to daddy. But don't you worry, I have the perfect solution for this."
Gyomei's arm effortlessly slides towards the back of your knees and he slings you over his shoulder, leaving you in a state of shock. You start smacking his back, in hopes that he’d put you down.
Yet, instead of providing an explanation, Gyomei simply laughs. "I love how feisty you are," he comments, smacking your ass and leaving a glowing red handprint in its wake.
"Just you wait, baby. I'm gonna make you feel so good," he states, a playful gleam in his eyes. You stare up at him with anticipation, excited for what he was going to do next. Little did you know what the night had in store for you.
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nothorses · 1 year
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Aren't you the one with the weird ass misogyny kink
This is such a perfect example of how fucking stupid callout culture is, actually.
For context, nearly two years ago now, a few blogs known for picking fights & starting harassment campaigns picked a fight & started a harassment campaign against first one transmasc blogger, then a bunch of other transmascs they harassed about reblogging his post who either didn't respond to them, or who responded unfavorably.
I won't get into the nitty-gritty here, but I did elsewhere [1] [2] and so have a few other folks.
I wasn't the original person called out. I was tacked on after the fact because I didn't respond.
What I've been "called out" for since then is, essentially, a bunch of complete bullshit made up by people who are pissed off that I encouraged people to think critically about the callout posts they came across.
Even among those lies, my sex life, kinks, fetishes, whatever- none of it has ever come up. Because I don't engage with that online, I never have, and I never will, for exactly this reason.
Would you be surprised if I told you this wasn't the first time I'd been accused of the "crimes" that original person was accused of?
You probably shouldn't be! This shit happens all the time, and it's only a natural progression of the callout culture it all stems from: one person has some shit they said taken out of context and painted in a bad light by a vindictive and usually transphobic internet loser, everyone who doesn't publicly disavow them immediately and without question is guilty by association, and what reason do they have to defend this person anyway, except so they can get away with the same thing? They must be doing it too!
And this ask especially is phrased in such a blatantly manipulate way. There's no good way to answer this: either I say "yes, but" and people stop thinking or caring there, or I say "no, here's what really happened" and I look weak and dubious for defending myself at all. The accusation has been made, the question has been asked, and now everything I say is with the assumption that this is something I am responsible for proving or disproving.
It's stupid and pointless and it's all fucking made up. It's designed to run on instinctive disgust and outrage, and what better conduit is there for rage and disgust than trans people? Especially trans people who talk about being trans.
And even putting all that aside: who fucking cares?
Who cares if one dude gets off to some shit he, in real life, both suffers from and actively tries to combat? Why are you so concerned with the private sexual fantasies of one random internet stranger? Why is it so important to you that everyone in the world know what this one dude thinks is hot when acted out between two consenting adults?
Come off anon and tell me all your kinks, anon. Tell me every single thing you have ever been turned on by, everything you've masturbated to, and why. I want detailed notes. I want links to porn. If you've made art, written fanfic, roleplayed- I want to see it.
C'mon, if this should be publicly available knowledge, let's start with you. It shouldn't matter as long as none of it's weird or off-putting to anyone else, right? You don't need to hide anything, right? There's nothing there you'd be embarrassed about, nothing you'd rather keep private, right? So what's the hold-up, why haven't you done this already? Why are you on anon to begin with; what are you hiding?
If anyone's the "sex freak" or whatever, anon, it's you. Nobody fucking needs this information about anyone, especially if they aren't sexually involved with each other. It's a massive invasion of privacy, and much more importantly it is textbook sexual harassment.
Anyway. Hi, voc and w-oc. I should be more surprised to see you two in my inbox, but I guess yall are obsessive enough to respond to, literally, a couple of tags on one reblog containing undefined, contextless acronyms of your urls. Hope you talk to a therapist about that someday.
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