#i literally have an exam today /: and it's a 3:30 class so im going to be dead on my fucking feet

[applexi]

school madness

#drama is happening in the school AND I AM IN ON IT RN‼️‼️‼️ /POS IM ABOUT TO RALLY WITH THE ADMINS RAAAUUAWWWWRR #OKAY SO LIKE?!?????!!!!!!!! #our exams are on monday #but not all of the teachers really had their chance to cover all the lessons for us to tackle for the reasons being: #1) the school loves extracurricular activities #2) national holidays (but this is understandable) #3) THEY WANT OUR FUCKING CLEARANCES SIGNED!!!!! SHOULDN'T THAT SHIT BE DONE /AFTER/ EXAMS????? #MF NO CLEARANCE NO EXAM EXCUSE MEEEEEEE YOU EXPECT LIKE 1K STUDENTS TO GO SCRAMBLE AROUND THE SCHOOL ASKING FOR SIGNATURES #youre pushing them to finish getting the admin signatures first RATHER than telling them to study for the exams??? and you tell me #OHH FINISH THE CLEARANCE FIRST BEFORE THE EXAMS #anyways the students and my class adviser (not an admin) are rallying to reschedule the exam for another week because this is bullshit #last school year our exams were transfered to january!!! why cant we do that last time!!!!!!!!!! #and it was okay!!!!!!!! #im like #mad and tired and fuckin OAUUAAHH #usually i feel thr urgent need to study to be prepared for the exams BUT I DON'T FEEL THE URGENCY BECAUSE WE WERENT TAUGHT PROPERLU 😭😭 #my complaining isnt even filled to my satisfaction i still have so much more to complain about ohmymgoiooodd #eugh whatever i literally walked out today to get my clearance signed (30% complete 😭 its not easy to get signatures) im gonna go write #absolute bullcrap i tel you #this week has been hell

[polaraffect]

"to get rid of sleep deprivation headaches, you should sleep between 7-9 hours at night-" no fucking shit google, do you think i would be googling this rn if i could sleep???

#damien.txt #day 4 in a row of not being able to sleep at night and having to go into work with god awful headaches #i know i've seriously fucked up my sleep schedule and so it's a bit my fault but like. jesus fucking christ brain can we please #have one nice thing. just one nice little time where we sleep and it's all good and fine #i literally have an exam today /: and it's a 3:30 class so im going to be dead on my fucking feet #and technically i have a night class from 6:30-9:20 but i've already decided im not going because i think i will actually pass out in it #this is really bad for me because so genuinely caffeine doesn't work on me. so i am full raw-dogging the exhaustion #and every single day this week has gone at a snail's pace bc i've been so tired. and none of it feels real. like im not processing it #which is so bad bc literally im like a week and a half away from finals. i have SO much to do. but my body has given up fr #probably Because im so stressed. but it's making me more stressed #everything is so cyclical. fuck. i just want to sleep. but i have to get ready for work #wish me luck /:

[shojislady]

2. SO SCANDALOUS

"-ess.. princess. wake up, we need to get ready. kacchans making pancakes right now."

grumbling, she turns over to look at her clock. it's 10:15am, izuku let her sleep in a bit. today, the class was going out to the mall then the arcade to have class bonding time. with everything that's gone on, from the USJ incident and the tension from the sports festival, to the fight with stain (where endeavor unfairly took credit, causing the girl to have a "slight" hatred for him), and even the final exams, having to go against All Might with Bakugo and Midoriya, it was just a lot to handle. they're just kids, and kids need breaks.

walking into the bathroom, the girl began her daily morning routine.

"damn.. i look ROUGH..!" she said as she looked in the mirror. her bonnet looked as if it was trying to run away, her tank top was all twisted up, right boob was up in russia while the left one stayed home in america. she had eye boogers all around and her angel bite piercings were no where to be found.

she slept good.

"you know what... let me just wash my face right now and i'll do everything else after i eat."

her face care routine consists of ; black african soap, witch hazel, hydration drops, and a bit of coco butter.

finishing up and putting away her stray boobs, she found one of bakugos stolen hoodies and made her way downstairs.

(i would just like to add that she sleeps in boxers so yk that ass lookin fat 😋)

"good morning guys!" she greeted everyone, with a slight smile and wave. almost everyone was up, with the exception of a few people.

"hii y/n!"

"mornin bestie!!"

"Good Morning, Y/n! Glad to see you awake!"

and so on and so forth

"mornin angel.. im making your pancakes right now, but there's bacon on the tiny burner and i made u a tiny omelette. those burner thingies really come in handy, you know?"

"its a heating tray, katsu. and yes, that's why i bought them." she bought them for holidays like christmas and american thanksgiving, but since there's 21 kids living in one dorm, it's used more than expected.

"is that my fucking hood?? i've been looking for that for weeks!" bakugo exclaimed, turning around to give the girl a plate so that she could fix her food. "when the hell did you even- whatever.. as long as i get it back."

(Spoiler Alert, he doesn't)

"erm.. anyways..! so guys, what time are we supposed to be leaving??" asked y/n, going to take a seat next to shoji.

"Well, we're trying to leave for the mall around 12:45 since it isn't far, then leave the mall no later than 4:30-5." yaomomo began to explain. "I was able to rent the arcade from 6:15 to 10:30, food and drinks included, along with lazer tag , and we get the option of going in the bounce area, so when we get there just let me know."

"damn yaomomo... i knew you was stacked but DAMN!!"

"ong, bro's LOADED.."

"i'm calling you if i need to bailed out of jail."

"honestly guys it's not much, i just want us to have fun and relax as a class while being safe!" yaomomo said with a small smile on her face. she was literally loaded, like pockets so deep they could fit 3 gallons of milk each, pockets so swole they need an ice pack, pockets so fat they need they own TLC show type rich. but even so, she didn't like to flaunt her wealth. she'd rather use her money to pay for gifts and events for her friends, rather than to flex some diamond earrings or a gold necklace. She's still a teen girl though, so she still loves to go shopping. The girl is really just happy that she's found friends that actually love her for her, and not for her money.

"you're so cute yaomomo! i love you!"

"well thank you y-"

"if anyone, i mean ANYONE fucks with you, call me. these hands are rated E for Everyone. my fists are activists. i dont care if they're old, young, tall, short, fine, ugly, gay, straight. I believe in equality, and with equality comes equally distributed ass whoopings jus-"

"OK, n/n! i think momo gets how much you love her! since you're done eating can u help me?" midoriya interrupted the girls small rant.

"you gotta face the consequences of last night huh? you should've listened to me, but yeah i'll help!"

"you dont have to rub salt on the wound!" he whined. "i'll get stuff and meet in your room again?"

"sounds like a plan, izuku!" she replied, getting up to grab her plate and bring to the kitchen.

"OoOh y/n~" jirou began to tease. "last night? your room AGAIN? what scandalous activities have you been up to?"

"chill kyo, its not like that! he messed up his hair on his own and we always hang in my room bc its more.. welcoming.. then his."

"i know, y/n! im jus messin' with ya."

with her plate in hand, y/n walked into the kitchen where bakugo resided. he was cleaning the and putting away the dirty plates before he started to soak the pans.

"so, the nerd fell asleep in your room again huh?" he asked, washing a plate.

"yeah, he started to doze off a little while after you left, so he slept with me."

"i dont know why you guys dont just ask eachother out yet. you two are basically in love with eachother."

"katsuki, you know how i feel, and you know how zuku is. im pretty sure if he would act the same way with the rest of the class as he acts with us if he just trusted them more." she informed, getting ready to wash her plate before bakugo snatched it.

"don't even try it." ever since they could crawl, they've never let the girl lift a finger. hungry? chef katsuki at your service! scraped your knee? Dr.deku to the rescue! and yes, they know that she's the perfectly capable and well off to do these things on her own, but why should she when she has two men to do it for her?

"anyways. we've all known eachother since literally birth. i see things, i observe things. you two are literally inseparable. im pretty sure y'all first words were eachothers names. you know how you act around him, you see with your own two (or four) eyes the way he acts with you, and im pretty sure he peeps it too. just ask eachother out already and stop being pussies for fucks sake!"

"oh my gosh?? shut the fuck up?? you're so damn loud??" she said, slapping him in the back of his neck.

"aye. try me again and we gotta tussle. i'm not deku. i'll will beat the black off you. i strike so much fear into your melanin pigmentation that it will come to me."

"whatever katsuki, u can run me my ones later, i gotta go help zuku now."

"ight then angel, u better be ready. see ya later."

with that, she finally left the kitchen and headed towards her dorm to meet izuku.

.*•

"finally.." the boy sighed. it's now 11:45 am, and they (she) just finished detangling, moisturizing, and somewhat styling his hair. at this point, her fingers and wrists were tired, her back was aching, her feet were sore, and she had the very violent urge to go back to her black roots and pop this nigga with the comb.

"I know damn well YOU not heavy breathing like you did some work. all yo lazy ass did was sit there and watch Netflix. YOU COULDN"T EVEN HOLD THE DAMN SPRAY..."

"I'm sorry, ma. thank you so much, I should've listened to you last night. now do you already have clothes ready? or do you need to pick something out?" he asked, pulling her into a hug and rubbing her back.

".. you better be so lucky i love you. but yes, i need to pick. have u chosen?"

" yup, right before I came to wake you up. so i'll help you if you want?"

"yes please"

taglist: @ast4rg1rl

I FINALLY DID IT YALL..

and i already started the next chapter🙏🏾

well i split this chapter up into 2 to make things easier on me and y'all!!

so if its not out by next week then i'll post something embarrassing 🙏🏾

BUT ILL BE IN DUBAI FOR A WHILE SO JULY 13th IS MY DEADLINE

anywho

when i show outfits and stuff they're just there for ppl like me who can't visualize that well <3

WELL

UNTILL NEXT TIMEE

#bnha midoriya #bnha smau #izuku midoriya x reader #izuku smau #mha iida #mha fanfiction #shojislady #mha bakugou #mha deku #deku midoriya #izuku x reader smut

[prettynhot]

13.01.2024 Sat restarting,revolving n readjusting.

new day,new me:) i’ll start talking about last night first. after i logged in here with my journal update, i left my course place n got home. while i was walking though, i witnessed the first snow falling in my city for this winter!

the snow was incredibly pretty and delicately falling with a slight cold breeze. the breeze moved my hair quite romantically, i was blushing from the cold so with my cute red cheeks n red nose, delicate snowflakes in my hair n outfit, i looked and felt like i was in a movie. people were passing by with literal awes and someone even offered to carry my bag for me! people are so nice <33

after i got home i ate my dinner,got some sweets and as i sat down to relax,i fell asleep😭 i woke up to a call from my sister, facetiming me to ask what to wear for her bday celebration. she just turned 30 this year! i still cant believe she is 30 now,she has that young aura n energy which makes everyone feel like she’d be in her 20s forever. crazy that shes stepping into her 30s now. im excited for this new chapter in her life, feel like its going to be her best one yet:)

after talking to my sister, i got up,changed from my outdoor clothes to my comfy sweatpants n thin,soft long sleeve,grabbed water n cleaned up my room a bit. after that i shopped online for a while and danced for at least 2 hours.

it was soo much fun!!! i hadnt danced in a quite long while n totally forgot how in touch with my femininity n grounded it makes me feel! while i was dancing ag’s new song played, titled ‘yes and’ which i quite liked!! then i saw that time flew by n it was nearly 12 am, which i was waiting for in order to celebrate my sister’s bday:) we facetimed at 12 exactly n i even blew candles for her! she got so happy n told me all about the presents she got n how her bday celebration went. we talked a bit but i needed to study so i had to hang up :(

then, since i had not studied at all ever since i got home,i sat down n studied for a good 2 hours, brushed my teeth n my hair n had a nice night sleep😴

woke up in a good mood, drank my morning water n had a filling, delicious breakfast with a good load of veggies, a whole lot of protein n some carbs. it was soo yummyy^^

then i got ready, decided to postpone the glamming for my little tc thing, since i didnt want a crush to get in the way of how my exam goes, knowing i wouldnt be as comfortable in all glam.

so i took the exam! it went quite nice at first but as time went by, nearing the end of the 3 hrs, my focus got harder to maintain n i didnt even realize i had a headache from constrating so hard! even though i didnt feel like i did as good as i was capable of, it still wasnt horrible n i know the result will be decent. so im pleased yet eager to do more!

after the exam, i had a class with my teacher:) the one whom i have a little crush on:) he was exceptionally smiley today! he asked me how my exam went, kiinda checked me out(i mightve even made it up honestly😭but lowkey felt it though!) chatted with us for a while. then his class starts, as usual hes very interactive with with everyone n me, jokes around n stuff.

one thing i really like about him is that he always looks at me while he’s telling a story about himself or anything personal really. its as if like hes telling that to me only as he is only making eye contact with me. it makes me feel super special!

it was quite hot in the classroom so i wanted to open the windows yet he was cold so he didnt want me to,and joked about that the whole class.

and he even came rlly close n sat beside me.specifically right beside me. just to talk to me.

UGHHHHHHHH

losing my pretty mind over that.

this man literally tried to sit on the heater to talk😭hes also absurd sometimes.

AND ALSO!!

HE TALKED ABOUT HOW HE IS TRYING TO NOT BREAK STUDENTS HEARTS NOW. WHILE LOOKING AT ME. HE WAS LIKE ‘IM WATCHING MY WORDS NOW SINCE I DONT WANT TO BREAK ANYONES HEART’. WHILE LOOKING AT ME. CUZ I TOLD HIM HE HURT ME THE OTHER DAY??

look, i might be delusional(likely) but come on, what would you think in my shoes?

i’d like to think that it was intentional so i will:)

n that was all for my little crush talk.

after his class i stayed on the place where i took my courses to study a bit more. while i was there, one of the founders of that place, offered me fruits n even cut them up for me🥹 hes usually an unusually cold man so i was quite suprised! but it made me very happy nonetheless!

after i was done, while i was leaving the course i came by the owner of the course place n chatted with him for a while, he’s the bestest! hes very intelligent and sweet!

that’s all i have for today! i texted with one of my best friends as well, we promised to meet this monday to visit our national library. we’ll see how everything goes!

im trying to readjust n revolve, into the girl who is disgustingly overeducated, into the girl who is balanced and feminine, into the girl who has everything together in her life<3

same time tomorrow?

#daily journal #daily diary #diary entry #journal entry #journal #journaling #day in the life #it girl #self improvement #that girl #dear diary #diary #male teacher crush #teacher attachment #teacher crush #male tc #tc crush #digital diary #my diary

[twicecorner]

Teachers Assistant: Prologue

A/N: Hi! I’m back and I’m trying something different out with this mini series. I hope you guys like it... I wrote a little prologue for the plot of the series and who will be featured in it. My hope is to get it going and release on a little schedule so look forward to the main parts :) I know I haven’t been very active lately, but I’m glad you all are still here and supporting me! Cheers and enjoy Teachers Assistant

Word count: 1,075

*This part doesn’t include smut however, the main series will ;) this is just a lil teaser to get your minds going about what may come - also big thanks n shoutout to @subfortwice for helping w the story development/brainstorming😌

It’s your big shot this year. Your university is known for its highly exclusive Love Lab, not only for the numerous studies they’ve done but also for their admirable professors. Each professor in the department is known for their own research on love and all of its components. Since the courses are in high demand, the professors are always in need of teachers’ assistants (TA’s) each year. However, this position requires the passing of a test that is supposedly harder than the Bar Exam. Even before getting to the tests, it’s a privilege to even have your application accepted. Out of the 10,000+ applicants, the professors handpick 50 to go through the trials. Participants are sworn to secrecy about the trials themselves, but it’s said that each trial is some one-on-one test with a set of professors. Out of the 9, a participant must get through at least 4 to pass.

This year, your senior year, your application finally got chosen. A week before classes officially started you received a mysterious letter with a date and time to be at the Love Lab. You’d guess it would be for an interview of some sort, but it was still weird that it came in letter form and it was literally just a date and time. You didn’t think much of it and you made your way to the school on the specified day.

Upon arriving, you saw a line at the entrance of about 30-40 other students, you’d guess they were all there for the same reason. Someone came out at exactly 8 am and let everyone into the auditorium and collected everyone’s phones. Inside the auditorium, all 9 professors stood on stage, arms crossed, and watched with hawk eyes through their glasses as you and the rest of the applicants piled in. 

Professor Park is the first to take the mic, “Ahem, good morning students. Welcome to the Love Lab trials. I will be honest, looking through the applications this year, there were not many standouts. However, my colleagues and I decided to take the benefit of the doubt and continue with the trials. Professor. Im will now explain how all of this will work.”

Professor. Im moves to the front of the stage as Prof. Park hands her the mic. “As most of you know, these trials will be one-on-one interviews, each professor has something different in store for each of you so it will be different every time. In order to pass, you will need to get the approval of 4/9 professors. At this point, you’ll be given a paper with your name and your date and time slots. Each professor and student will have 3 hours to complete the interview…” 

Whispers started to circulate through the crowd. No one expected an interview to be 3 hours long and to get through four of them. 12 hours at least.

“Excuse me.” Professor Im clears her throat and taps her foot on the stage. “As I was saying, since each interview is 3 hours, this will take the full week before school starts, so plan accordingly. A few of you have a slot for today, so with that, I’ll hand the mic back to Professor Park. Good luck.”

You can feel yourself start to sweat when you see that you have the second time slot of the day with Professor Im. You don’t know what you’re supposed to do until then, you didn’t prepare anything. You start looking around and seeing similar expressions on the people around you. Some start freaking out, some debating whether to back out. You take a deep breath and try to relax, try to tell yourself that you got this. It’s four interviews… four 3 hour interviews… Looking back at your schedule you see that your first four professors are Prof. Im Nayeon, Prof. Minatozaki Sana, Prof. Myoi Mina, and Prof. Park Jihyo. You mentally prepare yourself for the next few days, if you get past the first four you’ll be done, you’ll be in. 

Professor Park steps back into center stage. “You’ll now all be sworn to secrecy. We take this very seriously here, so don’t even think about trying anything funny.” The rest of the professors stood up and lined up next to her. Professor Yoo Jeongyeon took the mic and read from a small sheet of paper.

“Please raise your right hand and repeat after me…”

After reciting an oath like we were being initiated into some sort of secret society, we were told to head to the table in front of the stage and to sign a waiver of consent and secrecy. You skimmed over the waiver, something about legal action being taken if rules were broken caught your eye. Damn this shit is serious you thought to yourself. You scribbled your little name onto the paper and looked up to see Professor Park, move her glasses down the bridge of her nose to look down at you. You must have been crazy but it looked like she even had a little smirk on her face. 

Once everyone had finished signing the waivers, Professor Kim Dahyun grabbed the mic, “Finally, we’d all like to hank you for your cooperation and wanting to participate in this program. We look forward to meeting and working with you.” The 9 professors take a short bow of appreciation and receive some applauds in return. A bell rings and you look at your watch, it’s 9 o’clock, the first time slot on the paper. 

Professor Park says, “Those of you with time slots today, stick around. There will be food, drink and activities provided while you await your turn. Our current assistants will be here to aid you as well. To the first 9 participants, please make your way to the exit where you’ll be escorted to your interviews.” A small bustle burst out as the nine tried to find their way out and the rest of us scattered through the auditorium. I saw a large group of people walk to the main exit, assuming they didn’t have time slots today. The rest of you grouped together and murmered about what just happened.

Soon some assistants bring out snacks and drinks and your mind relaxes. They bring out games, books, movies… You, along with the handful of participants left in the auditorium are put at slight ease for now. Now all you can do is wait until noon.

#kpop fanfic #twice fanfic #male reader #twice smut #kpop smut #twice au #twice #im nayeon #yoo jeongyeon #hirai momo #minatozaki sana #park jihyo #myoi mina #kim dahyun #son chaeyoung #chou tzuyu #girl group fanfic #kpop au

[purplesurveys]

661

1. What time did you wake up this morning? 8 AM. That’s pretty late for me, but then again I fell asleep at 2 AM this morning keeping Gab company while she studied. 2. When did you take your default picture? The photo I have on this Tumblr was takennnnnn at least six months ago? It was definitely not too long ago. 3. Are you hungry? Not really. I can go for something sweet right now though – my mom went out to run some errands and I asked her to get my favorite cookie from Starbucks, the dark chocolate macadamia cookie, so I’m currently waiting for her to get back so I can finally satisfy my craving haha. 4. Have you ever cheated on a test? Once. It was an exam that I already had a feeling I was getting a 99 on, but there was one question I was stuck on so I was getting increasingly annoyed at potentially missing a perfect mark. Then in the middle of the exam the school played the 3 O’Clock Prayer (Catholic school quirks, lmao) so we had to pause the exam and stand up. As I was lightly pacing at my spot, I saw that the girl behind me had her exam paper open to the page with the question I was stuck on. I knew she was smart, so I just copied whatever answer she had. I ended up getting a 100 on that exam but I felt disgusting and I realized the perfect grade wasn’t worth it AT ALL and I never cheated again after that. 5. When was the last time you ate ice cream? Thursday! Gab and I picked up some ice cream at Mad Mark’s, which was a bit of a throwback considering the last time I had ice cream from there was 2015. But we were craving dessert, so yeah.

6. What computer game is in your CPU? My Mac has a sliding puzzle game, but I’m too lazy to check if it offers any other ones. 7. Do you like Audrey Hepburn? I LOVE her. Those who know me from my old old old surveys might remember how obsessed I used to be with Audrey andddd I’ve literally seen almost all of her movies, save for the ones that were released from the 70s to 80s because I never got to find those. She’s still very special to me and I still watch her movies and interviews from time to time :) 8. What color is your winter jacket? I don’t have one. 9. Do you have any siblings? I do. 10. Would you call yourself skinny? I’m on the petite side, but I wouldn’t call myself skinny. 11. Does your phone take pictures? Yes. Just realized this survey was published in 2008, which makes it a completely valid question at the time hahaha.

12. Who is your favorite neighbor? I don’t have one. 13. Do you wish at 11:11? I make a mock wish when I catch it, but yeah I never take it seriously. 14. Have you ever gotten a detention? Detention isn’t a thing here and to be honest I still have no idea what that entails. Do kids in detention sweep the floor? Write a sentence on the board 60 times like Bart Simpson? Whatever it is, we don’t have it here and it’s usually enough for students to simply be verbally scolded. 15. Do you still watch Disney Channel? When I’m at a hotel, yeah. That’s really the only time I get to chill in front of a TV these days. 16. Who did you last IM? Andrew. 17. Who is your least favorite teacher? All of my teachers this sem are good/great, fortunately. The last meh prof that I had is the one from my elective on contemporary Philippine history. That dude was so obviously unprepared all semester long, and I’ve never liked profs that appear or come to class unprepared. 18. What were you doing six hours ago? I was in UP. I’m part of the graduation committee and the second wave of grad photo shoots happened today, so I went in to take a shift. 19. What is your ringtone? I just have the default ones provided by Apple. 20. Does your door have a dead bolt on it? Yes, but I have to say I had to Google this because I’ve never heard this term before lmao. 21. Have you ever been to a show? I’ve...been to all kinds of shows? 22. What are some details about your first kiss? I was 16 and I was extremely nervous with my girlfriend who was extremely eager. We were supposed to kiss on a certain date, but I remembered it was the birthday of a girl in high school that I hate so I told her to push it up to midnight HAHAHA. The feeling wasn’t 100% ~sparks fly~ because I was really anxious, but it was a good experience nonetheless. 23. What college do you want to attend/currently attend? I only ever wanted to be in UP. I’m now in it and am graduating in four months.

24. Have you had any soda today? Nope, hate soda. 25. What is your favorite scary movie? Probably The Shining. Or Scream. 26. Do you own a Wii? We used to, but it gradually got overheated through the years until it was unable to boot up. Lots of amazing memories from it, though. 27. Did you wear shorts today? No, I’ve just been wearing a dress today. 28. Anything fun happening this weekend? I’m gonna go to my grandparents’ (dad’s side) in Laguna this Saturday, and as is tradition they’ll be preparing kare-kare, prawns, and crabs for us; Sunday will be Gabie and mine’s anniversary so we’ll be going to Art Fair PH in Makati and having a nice dinner :) 29. What shoes did you wear today? I dunno yet but I might just go for sneakers as always. 30. What is your favorite type of Pop Tart? Well, as a Third World Southeast Asian country that only gets the same four flavors (chocolate, cookies and cream, s’mores, and strawberry) – I’ll go with chocolate. 31. Do you subscribe to any magazines? Nope. And I never did when that was still a thing; I liked buying new issues by myself at the mall. 32. What was the last television show you watched? BoJack Horseman, which I started getting into this weekend. 33. Do you know any other languages? Filipino. 34. Are you wearing anything green? Not right now.

#survey #surveys

[hellokenmaz]

50 questions 

tagged by @ouryoonoh

What takes up too much of your time? tumblr to be honest 

What makes your day better? crying solves everything lmao its a cleanse 

What’s the best thing to happen to you today? I FOUND MY PRINTER PAPER THAT IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR EVERYWHERE IN MY HOUSE

What fictional place would you like to go to? hogwarts bro

Are you good at giving advice? depending on the situation lol

Do you have a mental illness? ADHD, depression & anxiety .

Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? do PTSD dreams count? if so yeah 

What musician inspired you the most? idk britney is iconic tho

Have you ever fallen in love? yes disappointingly lmao 

What’s your dream date? watching studio ghibli films, cuddling and it raining outside. 

What do others notice about you? apparently im nice idk

What’s an annoying habit you have? i never shut the FUCK up 

Do you still talk to your first love? i’d rather get injured than talk to him lmao. so no

How many exes do you have? 1 

How many songs are in your playlist? i dont do playlists i just have 3000 sounds 

What instruments can you play? 3!!! clarinet, piano &  Guitar. 

What do you have the most pictures of? nct, Jaehyun & my god daughter. 

Where would you like to go before you die? japan seems lit 

What’s your Zodiac? Sagittarius 

Do you relate to it? yes i have every single one of the negative things about this sign lmao 

What is happiness to you? contempt within oneself and their life, happiness follows after those are found. 

Are you going through anything right now? uni. its hard sos. 

What’s the worst decision you ever made? cutting my fringe myself while crying 30 mins before a final exam in grade 12. 

What’s your favourite store? the local art store, the got some cool ass shit. 

What’s your opinion on abortion? every woman has the right to have access to have one on her own accord. 

Do you keep a bucket list? no lol 

Do you have a favourite album? literally any song joji has had anything to do with fuck me up joji 

What do you want for your birthday? moneyyyyyyy

What are most people’s first impressions of you? here is a quote from my friend amanda “opal, you’re unreadable. like you’re so quite and just come to class and then fuck off. you also look like you could stab someone if they deserved it.” 

What age do you seem according to most people? like fucking 13 

Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping? on the floor lol

What word to you say the most? “mate” “fuck” “ sovereignty”

What’s the oldest age you would date? cap it off at like 3 years older 

What’s the youngest age you would date? i have 5 younger brothers i literally refuse to date or look at any male younger, you are automatically put into the little brother zone. girls? like a year younger

What job/career do most people say would suit you? lawyer lol i’d hope so too 

What’s your favourite music genre? lofi type shit 

If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be? idk?????? 

What is your current favourite song? slowing dancing in the dark - joji 

How long have you had this blog for? like barely 4 months since i started using it lol 

What are you excited for? finishing this semester 

Are you a better talker or listener?idk i cry to people a LOT but i also listen so both

What is the last productive thing you did? found my printing paper 

What do you want for Christmas? sleep 

What class do you get the best grades in? legal research, writing and analysis, also contract law, getting A’s in both. 

On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now? like 7 maybe 

What can you see yourself doing in ten years? lawyer with enough money to have regular as the theme song of my life

When did you get your first heartbreak? 16 

What age do you want to get married? yuck commitment 

What career did you want to have as a child? police officer, lawyer thats it lmao 

What do you crave right now? sleep

ill tag @winwinprinceofchina @k-ultarchive @127-mile @yanggerm @marculees @strayakids @matcha--ten @shiningxuxi

[doctormage]

hi i just need to be really dramatic and long winded bc if i dont get it Out im going to fucking explode

ive actually been trying really hard this semester with my thesis and its REALLY fucking difficult for me. my depression makes me catatonic and unable to complete simple tasks or be motivated to do literally anything; my anxiety paralyzes me at the slightest unexpected change and then obsess over whether everyone in my life hates me because of my anxiety; my sleep schedule is constantly fucked and my doctor is unhelpful; my bdd will sidetrack me from my work and responsibilities for literal hours or days, and sometimes if its feeling spicy send me on a full scale fucking breakdown; and my adhd makes all this shit worse on TOP of all the NORMAL adhd shit. like thats just!!! my life!!!! at all times!!!!! and there have been several times where i have genuinely considered leaving this program or not continuing school after bc i was so fucking overwhelmed and exhausted and scared but i didnt!!! like i make a lot of jokes about procrastinating and wasting my time and doing the least and whatever but in reality its really fucking difficult for me even when im medicated!!! but i dont like admitting that bc of all my exhausting childhood baggage and shit but that is not the point of this rant so anyway

this semester i made a specific effort to try and be a better student even tho all of this stuff has been exacerbated by grad school. i felt i owed it to my director and one of my committee members because theyve been so fucking helpful and put their faith in me and took a lot of their time to help me. i wanted to show them i was worthy of it and capable of being a good student who does all the shit she’s supposed to do, does it well, and does it on time. i overloaded my fall semester and nearly lost my goddamn mind JUST to have a lighter class load this semester so i could focus most of my time on my thesis (like for real that was actually incredibly stupid of me. i lost almost 30 pounds from september to december without conscious effort just because i was so fucking stressed. not a brag and actually kind of concerning bc that has LITERALLY never happened to me). it has been like....significantly taxing, but i wanted to show them how much i appreciate their time and effort and help by being responsible and respectful. my Trying Hard is a lot of people’s Barely Doing Their Best and i know that. turning something in 2 hours early is below average for some but for me, literally anything more than 30 minutes before its due is an actual goddamn miracle. but i wanted to work hard and do things right for my committee members because they deserve it

this christmas my parents asked what i wanted and the ONLY thing i asked for was help with my library dues. last year from like march to october i was significantly depressed and entirely out of my head, and i racked up some pretty bad overdue fees. i didnt even ask them to pay all of it, just some of it. less than $100. im really truly grateful for the gifts they DID get me, but i didnt ask for them for any of it, and my overdue fees were left alone. i was under the impression that they got paid and, like a fucking idiot, i didnt check up on it to confirm. ive been so hell deep in my thesis and teaching and grading and applying to phd programs and looking for apartments and shit that it really just slipped my fucking mind!!! crazy!!!!

today i was in crisis bc i thought i fucked up with scheduling my defense/exam/whatever the fuck. im going to call it defense and i dont give a shit bc everyone calls it some other shit and i dont CARE. anyway i really thought i fucked up but i went and talked it out with my director and it was all sorted out. i’ve gotten like 50% of her feedback on my thesis draft, which i’ve incorporated, and im waiting on comments from another reader (the other helpful person on my committee). we have to run some dumbass software before scheduling, so i ran it today and tried to schedule it but couldnt bc theres a hold on my account. i went on a fucking....ALMIGHTY QUEST to figure it out and i finally discovered that guess what!!!!!!! its my GODDAMN LIBRARY OVERDUE FEES!!!!!! THAT I THOUGHT WERE PAID!!!!!!! i had to pay them myself which is fine idc but it takes several days to process. this fucks up my life on SEVERAL levels

for one, its fucking impossible to get a hold of my third committee member. she is a vapor in the wind. shes like super busy and thats all good and well but the point is theres like zero communication there. i finally got confirmation on a defense date from all 3 members and had been literally planning MY ENTIRE LIFE around this date. after todays first scheduling crisis i was so happy i was still on track, but now this? now i have to wait 3-4 days before i can even SCHEDULE the defense. the super delightful part is that we have to schedule a minimum of 2 weeks in advance. so now i cant schedule my defense until tuesday at the absolute earliest, but that ALSO bumps my defense date several days ahead. i have no fucking clue if my committee is going to agree on another day that works for everyone bc theyre all busy as shit and we’d been working toward the original date for weeks if not months, and im so fucking upset because this is exactly what i DIDNT want to have happen. i havent tried to email them yet because im hoping beyond fucking hope i can call somebody at the university tomorrow and see if the hold is something else besides the fee, but it makes me sick to think of having to be like “oh sorry i know i constantly fuck up everything ever and im a piece of shit but can we change this date we’ve had set since january because i was an extra shitty piece of shit this time??” like OHHH MY GODDDDD

and the thing thats really fucking with me is that like, yes its my fault but this one time its not ENTIRELY 100% my fault. i asked for a favor and had the understanding that it was taken care of. yes the fees were my doing and yes i shouldve checked but oh my fucking god. i feel like all the effort ive put into being a better student this semester has been for fucking nothing because im going to have to email my committee asking for a different date and ruin all their fucking lives and theyll be so disappointed in me. i have like legitimately been crying on and off about it since like 4:30 today

it so shitty in and of itself but i especially dont want to do this to my director bc she is legitimately the reason im finishing this program AND that im going to a phd program. a year ago i’d barely spoken 20 words to her but she still agreed to be a reader on my committee just because she heard me explain my thesis for all of 30 seconds and decided to give it a try. she literally had not read a song of ice and fire at the time and she started reading them for me to help me with my thesis. in the fall when my original director basically threatened to leave my committee if i didnt change all my ideas, my current director stepped in and helped me and talked me through it and then offered to take her place even though my research is BARELY distantly related to hers. through all of this she’s been so insanely patient with me, super encouraging of my ideas both in this project and in others, helped me decide whether it was right for me to get my phd immediately after my masters, proofed and edited and helped me with ALL my phd application materials, and STILL is in the process of reading these goddamn books just to be a better director. i have lost my head so many times and shes always been there to help me figure my shit out, and i wanted to have it figured out for once. how stupid of me

like bumping the date isnt the end of the whole world but its really not just about the fact that i have to reschedule. i was trying real goddamn hard to be a better student this semester and i REALLY fucking owed it to my director and other reader, but especially director, and i still managed to fuck up this bad. i feel like such a DISAPPOINTMENT and it just will not leave my brain bc im so mad at myself. i tried watching shows and youtube compilations about game of thrones and shit but now my bf is asleep and im alone and its all i can think about. im so fucking tired of being the person i am honestly and i dont mean that in an edgy way its just like jesus christ i wish there was less shit wrong with me. i wish i had any kind of willpower or discipline so i couldve learned these skills and been a better student from the start. i wish i wasnt a giant piece of shit!!!!! 

and now im going to be up late being anxious about all this which means that i will, once again, wake up late but also still be really exhausted, which means i’ll do a shitty job teaching and get overwhelmed by everything and who the fuck knows what fun bullshittery will ensue because of it. i am so fucking tired of me and my fuckery and the fact that it fucks with other people even why i try so hard for it not to. tired!!!!!!!! fucking tired

#p #this is literally like an essay #on why im a piece of shit lmao #ignore me!!!!!!

[my-brainhurts]

why do i feel like this. how did i get this point.

so i have an exam tomorrow. i need to get 20 marks to not literally fail. how on earth did i go from someone who did well to someone who counts from the bottom up to make sure they pass.

this whole semester has been so bad. i know i say that every semester but i swear it keeps getting worse. it started online after the break. and that point i had been binging books for a while and felt totally disconnected. that just continued in the online part of the semester. i didnt go for classes. i tried, but i couldnt concentrate well enough to actually grasp anything, and it was too easy to let myself sleep through the day and ignore my problems. skip a month and we're on campus. im failing quizzes. i cant keep up with classes. i do poorly in most of my midsems. i still havent caught up to my backlog, soon enough, it feels too big a mountain to tackle. so i pretend it doesnt exist, focus of skimming for quizzes and wasting time. jump to today. ive been scamming my labs, ive attended maybe 10/30 classes. im av-40, which lands me somewhere between d and e. i havent been able to study for the exam so i cant do well tomorrow. ive covered so little in fact that im worried ill get somewhere around 0-10 marks when i need at least 15 minimum. its totally closed book so i cant even try to bs from my book, it all has to be from my head.

ive covered trees barely. i might do sorting algos. run time complexity i can sort of make shit up about.

i dont know whats wrong with me. sometimes i feel so lethargic and tired but the moment i switch tabs i can feel my mental state improving instantly its insane.

i think this time when i go home i have to get help. im home for 3 months minimum, im mostly free. either i kill myself or i try and fix myself, and my problems have gone past my own pay grade. i dont know how to ask to get help...ill have to try somehow i guess

[superbolt]

Quiz Eps.

— 11:03 pm // 02.16.2022

I started a quiz today at 11:30 am with classes in between. It took me almost 12 hours to finish it but I guess I could have passed it an hour early only if I did stick with my idea on a 3-point question. Not the stressest yet, I dont think so hahaha. But todaaay, it’s the “Peace tayo, peace” HAHAHAHAH

— 1:45 am // 02.19.2022

It’s a pre-quiz craming time. How can i even fit all these 31 vidlecs in a night? hahahah galing half way to go. Ok tuloy tuloy.

The quiz was so awful, I can't even...

— 11:48 pm // 02.21.2022

Okayy so, I am currently reviewing for our sepa exams tomorrow and duuude my answer in my recent quiz was so bad, like supeeer bad brooomam. Tipong nakakahiyang ipacheck, its beyond disaster HAHAHHHA. UGHHH. K tuloy tuloy. 🙃

—9:13 pm // 03.04.2022

not quiz-related pero funny. So i assumed na there is no class kaninang 4:30 and nagpost din yung prof ng assignment. Okay, so aware ako na may gagawin but then i didn't even have the plan of checking the due date kasi naman sanay na day/s ang duration hahaha pero pagkabukas ko ng around 7:50, due na pala nung 7:30. Edi i told my friends, thank God we really are friends. Walang nagcheck ng due date hahaha. Yung lang hihi.

— 1:18 am // 03.07.2022

grabe im taking so so long already with this SA. ive manipulated the formula pero di ko parin makuha kuha huhu. Maglab na yata ako.

— 5:29 am // 03.10.2022

discorded from 9 pm to 5:27 am. kinda felt productive, really. tho im not finish yet. zZz. dont wanna have my 7:30 class later- hopefully none.

— 6:28 am // 03.15.2022

discorded from 8:30 to pass 6 and cooked some rice before going to sleep. all my dues are done except for lab, tho im done answering but i didnt turn it in yet

— 2:30 am // 03.17.2022

was planning to finish my el62 and start with my lab computation tonight kaso I just couldnt think straight and fast so tulog nalang muna hihu. My el62 prof is so extra lang in making our quizzes, it makes you work really hard for your score haha. night!

just to share sumthin about this^... so it was around 5:15 pm already when i asked my friend how many pages she was able to do, and out of surprise she told me that she was STILL about to do it. lokang loka si ghurl, our due date is 6:30 that day, and how can u even think and search that fast within approx 1 hr 40 mins. time left (ang hirap kaya magsearch and all knowing that it requires a "detailed" output daw) hahahah grabe samantalang if Ill calculate how much time i spent to finish it, dude thats half day for me hahahha baka more pa. Plus, I was able to fill up full 5 pages including references hahhaha. I cannot with that kind of risk and pressure lang. Power to my friend hahaha. IBA.

— 10:51 am // 03.18.2022

finished video A, did half of the lab computations last night and slept at 6:18 am kanina. i woke up around 9 to eat my breaky and now im back to bed, planning to wake up by lunch or 1 so i can immediately start reviewing for my quiz tomorrow < so sad that i cant make it to the province with my mom huhu > k, l8ers. " 2:44 pm -- woke up at pass 1 to review and kakaend ko lang since i feel sleepy na. im left with 3 vids for video B and another 3 from video C grabe ang hard to understand :€ nakakastress, idk if im still gonna finish it all or just push thru on practice probs. im literally having an absorption crisis. 💀

— 12:38 // 03.18.2022

stopped reviewing already, sleep is more important especially when u know that there is nothing's going inside your head na. haays. hoping for the best or atleast better tomorrow. thank u Lord agad ~.~ gnight and best of luck!

— 3:31 am // 03.25.2022

had a research night with my besties, it was a productive and a fun one. these baes never failed to be so cool. I kinda laughed a lot too and even discorded alongside it. :>> waiting for dad to wee, so i can immediately paint the ceiling part after hahahaha, tibay yarn. ~ seg lang, i really want to eat shawarma from the sharwarma in bloom bukas or sa sat. Di pwedeng matapos nang di ako nakakakain ng tinda nilang shawarma hmm lets see.

— 2:48 am // 05.16.2022

answered our solution thermo quiz ng 11:30 am and submitted it pass 9 pm. After dinner, I immediately started with my PhychemLab quiz and natapos ko naman din by pass 12 then reviewed sobrang a little lang on CRE. Ang sakit parin talaga ng back ko huhu. goodnight. Buy ako ballpen tomorrow.

— 12:25 am // 05.18.2022

no naps for today. Quiz whole noon to evening. Im more of tired than drained? anw ill get things done tomorrow na hopefully all. And go buuuuy ballpen refill for real na tomorrow.

#Spotify

[jump-off-a-clifford-universe]

ok i don’t normally do this but i really really need to rant

i literally do not want to wake up because there’s too much to deal with. 

so i live in hong kong (city in south east asia), and obviously most schools do hong kong exams (except some international schools??i don't really know), but my school chose to do the international GCSEs in grade 10 which is an UK exam, and go back to the hong kong exams (equivalent to SATs or A-levels) in grade 12. so naturally there are some differences and the gap between is quite wide and there are a lot of catching up to do cuz we’ve lost the whole year 10 to the GCSEs already and there’s only roughly 1.5 year to prepare for the exam at the end of year 12. 

the GCSEs ended last last week and we’ve had a week of holiday. and now we have to go back to school for “post exam activities” which I thought was gonna be chilled, but noooooo honey. they made us start year 11 now. literally wtf. i’ve just finished the first public exam in my life and now you’re telling me i’ve got to start preparing for my second one in 3 years. and that’s not even the problem. 

so i went back to school and i had chinese lesson, and i thought it was gonna be chilled, like nothing to do and just chat kind of chilled, but as soon as I got in the classroom, the teacher made us do a year 12 chinese public exam paper WHILE IM STILL IN YEAR !!!10!!! and told us we should at least get 75%. literally what the heck again. people who do this paper at the end of year 12 are still failing or getting bad grades and now my school be telling us we should get a 75% when i’m still in year 10. what. the. hell. 

(but if you’re wondering i got 81% so that’s not bad) 

then I went to english class and woohoo the teacher told us we have to submit 2 research papers on either a documentary or movie and either a fiction or nonfiction book. again, i just finished my exams. let me live. 

normally i won’t complain about school but i’ve literally been taking tests and exams all school year. october to november - test season (3 tests per subject, 13 subjects), december to january - exam season, february - test season (3 tests per subject, 13 subjects), march to april - mock exams, may to june - real GCSEs. non stop. i swear this whole school year i spent every single weekend studying or taking extracurriculars. 

and i feel so lied to?? every single teacher in our school is telling us that if we get As, we’re average, and Bs are below international average because the hong kong curriculum isn’t the most academically challenging. really? then why the high suicide rates? 

i’ve never realised it but our school has always been indoctrinating us to believe that our only choice is to get into a good uni after secondary school. just like last month we had a “careers’ choices and future planning” workshop where we were introduced many universities and stuff, our school didn't even bother to tell us about the less prestigious school??? so like they said we could go study abroad in the uk, and some uni examples are oxbridge, uni of manchester, london school of economics and imperial college, and that’s all. literally. they were literally hinting to us that these unis are the only choices and withdrawing information about less prestigious unis from us. same for the US unis where they only told us about the ivy leagues. 

and so last year i’ve decided to do vet med at either Cambridge or Cornell, and ever since i’ve been studying my ass off and joining a bunch of different activities (related or not related - I need the certificates and experiences). i didn’t realise it but i’ve got so much on my plate. to illustrate here’s my usual timetable for the majority of the year 

monday - school 7:45 to 4:00                 athletics 4:00 to 7:00                 dinner 7:30 to 7:45                 shower 7:45 to 8:00                 homework and studying 8:00 to however late it might be 

tuesday - school 7:45 to 4:00                 french 4:00 to 5:30                  homework and studying 6:00 to 7:30                  dinner 7:30 to 7:45                 shower 7:45 to 8:00                                 piano practice 8:00 to 9:30                  homework and studying 9:30 to however late it might be 

and basically everyday is the same but with different extracurriculars. some days i even get at 5 to get some shit done before school. 

i rmb this one time i was painting at night cuz i study art and it was really late. it was so late that i heard birds chirping outside to i knew i had to at least sleep for an hour or two before school. i packed up and went to the washroom to pour away the dirty paint water but accidentally spilled everything on the floor. now normally i would’ve cleaned it up. no big deal. but that day i was so tired that i sat in the puddle on paint water and cried for an hour then got changed and went to school like nothing happened. no one knew because i handed in everything. i had good grades. i didn’t complain. but that doesn't make it ok. it doesn't change the fact that the school is pushing the students too hard. 

another one of my friend was so exhausted that she had to stay in a hospital for 2 weeks. all because of school. another one of my friend wrote and typed so much that she pulled some muscles in her hand and she couldn’t play guitar now. 

and i’ve been holding on so well because i was literally too busy to feel the stress?? but that’s a lie cuz i have so many breakouts. i used to have such good skin but now i have breakouts all over my forehead cuz of stress. 

so long story short i had a breakdown today and now i think i’m sick but i don't wanna skip school.

#rant #school #studyblr #education #break down #stress #pressure #grades #extracurricular #exam #exams #tests #test #gcse #igcse #dse #hong kong

[shytiff]

Small Nov Wins

1 - cant bring myself to study, got out of bed 10:30-ish am. While lazing around i read royal servant and do random internet stuff and watched romee's vlogs. Ate breakfast and i somehow has no appetite?? This is rare. e, cicil kompre began at 15:30 pm (i know, i waste my time a lot). Pengumuman wahana mpi wow yay kalideres makara and budi asih

2 - the weather was pleasantly cloudy. poli anestesi anak, simul. went to what used to be calais, its called flavola now. at this point i quite need some calories because i only ate bubur ayam and its like 2-3 pm ish. Eventually the hunger is gone, arrived home at about 4-ish, drank protein to curb my hunger (nanggung dinner). dad said sumn that annoyed me so after maghrib i just lazed in bed, not feeling like doing anything (even though there’s lots of exams and hw lmao), fell asleep

3 - woke up at 2 am, prated, randomly searched for angel - chancellor and taeyeon’s lyrics and i basically wept at 4 am. i assumed the song was just like,,, a guy talking to a girl, his angel, you know. EXCEPT,,,,,,,,. the 2 MVs was also rly222 beautiful 🥺. Poli geriatri today, didnt even see patient because there was no more at that time (status salin nadia). ate ichiban salad (surprisingly quite good) at dm bcs i rly do be functioning better outdoors, made matcha latte with full cream milk ((powder)), cicil PT

4 - can finally wake up late. finished 1 sitasi pt, made ikk ppt, bujing lina called about diarrhea and nausea meds, laddered the leader for tomorrow’s exam and it,, was,,, me,, group call with shiko. frantically studied for EA

5 - PT (finished in 45 mins), simul as a leader, with STEMI, VF and hypoglycemia case. somehow made it through. i suck at dosages omggg. PP by car with mom (not rly that tired) but i SLEPT after i got home and had no mood to study helpppp

6 - did my first swab test today. i pushed the doctors hand when she’s doing oropharyngeal swab im sorryyyy 😂. slept. matcha. cicil kompre

7 - still havent finished ikk (deadline: today), and still havent studied for geri and ikk AND i still managed to take a nap. why. Read a bit of kompre. Not sleepy after matcha, but insted i reread bj alex and tsubaki chou lonely planet until 2 am the next day #rippriorities

8 - im having matcha latte seven days in a row as of today :))))) woke up at 10:30 am, went to flavola with atikah and got strawberry yakult (tasted like es mony), arrived home at abt 7-ish am and there no dinner, so i drank protein and ate japota honey butter. My breakfast was chicken porridge, so my diet is sooo liquid today. Rip proper nutrition (ate buryam, lumpia, japota for the whole day and drank 3 beverage). Cicil kompre and studied geri

9 - suma geri, slept, cicil kompre, ny head kind of hurts

10 - my head still hurts, suma ikk with dr herqu and dr retno, didnt take swab result by car because the TRAFFIC in soetta so my brother took it. Thankfully negative.

11 - lulus kompre alhamdulillah, the examiner were Prof Saptawati and dr. Dani from THT. Dr dani still remembered me :"") they were very kind. Went to tamel for first wahana: klinik makara UI. Picked up masker first at mahmudas place, and then went to depok. On the way i was interviewed by maba 2020 wtf im so old. Cleaned up my room with the fam, printed sumn in barel (its quite empty there)

12 - first day at klinik makara ui. i WALKED. such wow. fixed my shoes in kutek. had breakfast in barel and bahari for lunch-dinner. somehow i felt very drained. bought Dapur Alya (nutella and regal) and 2 salads from Salad Point since there was 11.11 promo. Put all of them in the fridge. Read Fools and its sooo good omg

13 - had salad and left over bahari rice for brekkie. went to clinic by grabbike :)))), had my first teleconsultation experience today, a chemical trauma case. suma ea with the help of shiko

14 - woke up at 5:20 ish and i jogged a bit at ui lmaoo. fisip - ft - fisip. By 6:30 im already back at my room. 1 hour can be spent a lot of different ways, it turns out. Washed my clothes. Ate monstercheese pizza. Slept a bit. Went to blok m with ara (she was late as always, surprised her with koi milk tea), ate futago ya (greasy cheesy milky goodness, enak tapi eneg afterwards), bought red bean bread at la mouette, bought discounted onigiri bento box at papaya. We went to m bloc space, looked around, ate gelato at kebunide (blueberry: yum, fresh, kiiinda feels artificial, salted caramel: delicious but makes me thirsty) and did photobox at connectoon. Walked to mrt asean but turns out!! for weekends mrt is closed at 8pm. Took grabbike to sudirman, seeing the pretty city and people just hanging out, playing skateboards on the wide sidewalks.

15 - planned to go jogging with salemba frens but i woke up late (06:45), so i just lazed around. Ate onigiri bento (super worth it for 25k for the proteins), fell asleep again 10ish to 14:30 lmaoo. The doms from yesterday was present even on the right side of my lower back 🙂 the red bean bread made me feel full, and the red bean was not too sweet, which i love. Reviewed some meshwork materials i missed. Fianti called and we talked abt her and hari

16 - had mujigae for sahur and fish bite for iftar. The fish was not as soft as fish streat, but the flour was definitely better and crunchy. But it doesnt have the seasoning micin like fish streat do. The pasta was quite a lot im in food coma afterwards. Fell asleep, and my stomach was so gassy that i woke up in the middle with a headache that does not play around. Fortunately it dissapeared in the morning

17 - breakfast is rice kimchi and abon lmaoo just pretend it makes sense. The scrubs i ordered finally arrived. I fell asleep AGAIN, WHYYYY. Lost my streak in DL, i guess i can stop using it for now.

18 - finished reading blood link, girlll i thought the human died at the end. Did not buy food today wow. Took a nap and cicil kompre.

19 - brekkie at barel. Helped measuring antropometry today at clinic, and also measured my own. The fucked up thing was that i THOUGHT my body fat is still at 28% compared to the past (dr rina's research). So i looked at the old paper AND. I USED TO HAVE. 35% FAT 🙂 even my memories are in denial and are fooling me. All this time i thought i was at 28 🙂 did swab at rsui. The one swabbing was from fkui 2012 and we had small talk. It hurted more than lmk :( now this does feel like drowning in water (cause before i said "nah its not like water in nose"). Took angkot back to tamel, bought piscok lumer pocin and its soooo gooood ugh

20 - i feel like if i have breakfast with leftover rice and abon and sozzis i get hungry faster lmaoo. Ordered ken karaage from kukusan, yaa okela for 25k with ongkir. Did online posbindu education through wa. BTS BE COMEBACK 🥺 i maximized my wifi time (no wifi at tamel) so i listened to the whole album. My mobile data is at 200MB lol. Read a good longreads from the atlantic, about down synd and genetic screening. The writing is so so good im just blown away. And teary eyed.

21 - ran a bit, solid class (gastro, rheum, infection), embryo, webinar about sleep by dr Gita Anindyajati, SpKJ, bought ayam geprek gold chick (lotsss of oil since i ordered tempe, jamur, egg, bought pop cookies. matcha cheese was actually better than i expected (the combination somehow fits), dark chocolate and marshmallow is very chocolatey like mom’s brownies, and vegan strawberry cookie with a hint of mint. i wonder how they replace the egg. I wonder why after i run i dont feel hungry for a moment. bloating just gooes away

22 - joined kris' healthy weekly event (lmao) in tamsur. They went to epiwalk first. Its difficult for me to run w mask, ngl. Went back to tamel, embryo, ate leftover meal from gold and chick, felt somehow drained to the bone so i just laid in bed and lazed and lazed. Theres no soreness, but the weakness was generalized lmao. Ordered bbq chicken almond salad from salad point, it was actually quite fulfilling and delishhh (added chili sauce to the dressing). Literally laid in bed from 7 until i fell asleep and woke up at 6 the next day. Finished readin shame application lmao

23 - i still feel tired ckckck. No doms, but i feel like i just want to lay down. got DV patient today at clinic, its most likely derm numularis??? Ate salad and dark choco marshmallow cookies in the evening and that cookie. Is so damn sweet im just thinking about the increase in my blood sugar. And i like sweets so!!! Never thought id find sumn too sweet. Washed my clothes and cicil ukmppd (i put things about studying ukmppd in habitica now)

24 - ate tanoshi sushi and ufo ramen for bfast, ate the sushi again for lunch and after waking up from my sleep i tried kokku ramen (so so, but the egg yolk's good)

25 - bfast: superbubur, protein shake and cookies. (did not make me feel full long enough). Ordered burger from EATG (so so, burger bener is better) for lunch. Last day at makara ui. Ara arrived coz shes staying here in tamel. Waiting for mom to arrive from cibubur, she arrived at about 20:30. I passed out at home

26 - first day in pkm kalideres, i volunteered to be pj to avoid RSUD. my room is a mess, i feel tired after i go back. maybe its the physical withdrawal (?) because i dont walk like when im on klinik makara. came to pkm thinking i wont do anything (orientation only) but the 6 of us ended up going. i was at igd. i saw nail extraction and injected ats for another patient 

27 - talked for almost an hour with the doctor at poli lansia. went home, felt sooo tired, i slept and actually showered after maghrib. originally planned to go to sbux but i was just tired af. my mood was horrible at home. 

28 - turns out i started my period today. i havent studied at all during pkm kalideres era. embryo. slept again. read some manga by nishin something with the psychological and BL genre. 

29 - embryo. cut my hair, showered, and felt better. fell asleep on dr gita's lecture. Drank cimory banana milk with a bit of matcha powder. I dont know if its the sleep, or a bit of caffeine, but my mood feels better and im more awake. Cicil ukmppd with a slow pace. Read itasaku ff. Slept at about 2 am

30 - surprisingly, i dont feel sleepy when i wake up. poli anak today, surprisingly i got perinatology case (jaundice). presented it on pleno. for bfast i ate 3 slice of bread (2 with meat and cheese, 1 choco and cheese) and protein shake, lunch: a slice of choco cheese bread and a banana, fell asleep, dinner: 1 bakwan, a banana and nextar. i can feel that the calories i got today is even less than what i usually got (and usually i already try to limit calories that i am counting the intake amout and made sure im not too far from my bmr lmaoo (~1100)

[medamoiselle-blog]

2017 in Review

I read mdA’s year in review and wanted to use her template to reflect on my year, too. 

1 - What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before?

Hung out with a group of friends and slept over without worrying about all the studying I’d have to do that weekend, went to a classmate’s/friend’s wedding, signed up to take Step 1 (omgomgomg), went through a messy break up, traveled to Europe by myself, rode on a train for the first time! (which actually took 6 hours instead of 4 because something was wrong with the train and they had to fix it halfway through the journey), killed a spider, read Lolita, went on a vacation for Spring Break, completed a project and wrote a research manuscript from start to finish, went to the Weeknd’s concert!  2 - Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I dont remember if I made any resolutions last year...I usually don’t. But, for this year, I am going to continue doing what I have learned to do these past few months: 

1) focus on myself more (my health, my fitness, my happiness) 

2) get rid of toxic people and distractions in my life 

3) study for and do well on boards 

4) No more social media until after boards 

3 - Did anyone close to you give birth?

No.

4 - Did anyone close to you die?

No. 

5 - What countries did you visit?

Some European countries, Mexico, Japan.

6 - What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017?

Better, more supportive friends. I used to hang out with a group of gunners (they literally wouldnt share resources because they ‘dont want other people to do well on boards’ and didnt understand why that was upsetting to me). I distanced myself and I’ve been happier.  7 - What date from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

April 14th, went on a spontaneous quick trip to Japan mid semester and learned most of renal phys on the 15hr plane rides to and from Tokyo. Stayed at the Disney resort and had a magical time. 

8 - What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Taking care of my mental health, getting to know myself better, submitting my manuscript for publication. This year was full of ups and downs and many firsts, so I’ve learned a lot and have gained experiences that I value very much. That’s an accomplishment to me.

9 - What was your biggest failure?

I stopped running a few months ago, but I plan on getting back into it before this semester starts!  10 - Did you suffer illness or injury?

Thankfully, nothing serious.  11 - What was the best thing you bought?

I bought myself a ring and I absolutely love it! I love the way it looks on my finger and like wearing it. 

As for practical things, I bough an iPad Pro and now that’s all I use to take notes, study, etc. I don’t use paper anymore and it’s really nice to have all my material in one place.  12 - Whose behavior merited celebration?

All of the women and men who shared their stories using #MeToo. My parents for putting up with me and taking care of me when I visit, physically and mentally tired. The one student in our class who shared his struggles with suicide and depression in an effort to help others.  13 - Whose behavior made you appalled or depressed?

a lot of politicians...people trying to take away net neutrality, Trump and his tweets, the ex who told me [after we’d talked about doing residencies in the same hospital and how many children we wanted, etc.] that he wouldnt be introducing me to his parents or be able to marry me because I wasn't Egyptian and his mom wouldnt approve [Boy, bye], the mom who tried to exploit money using a bullying video.

14 - Where did most of your money go?

BOARDS. Who knew it was so expensive to schedule board exams...*le sigh* Also, a lot of money spent on resources...*le cry*

15 - What did you get really, really, really excited about?

I woke up to the first snow of the season and I could not contain myself!  16 - What song(s) will always remind you of 2017?

The Weeknd-Staryboy  17 - Compared to this time last year, are you: I. Happier or sadder?

A little bit of both...sadder and more stressed in some ways, but happier and more content in other ways. Overall, I’m in a good place. 

II. Thinner or fatter?

Thinner.

III. Richer or poorer?

Poorer. 

18 - What do you wish you’d done more of?

More dancing. 

19 - What do you wish you’d done less of?

Social media.  20 - How will you be spending/spent christmas?

Hung out, made and ate xmas dinner, and enjoyed great company <3 

21 - Did you fall in love in 2017?

No, i thought I did at some point tho.  22 - How many one-night stands?

1

23 - What was your favorite tv program?

The Blacklist. 

24 - Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Yeah.  25 - What was the best book you read?

Both Nejma and Salt by Nayyirah Waheed were great reads.  26 - What was your greatest musical discovery?

Dua Lipa.  27 - What did you want and get?

A ring, cute Timberland boots, an iPad Pro w an apple pen, an A in neuro (neuro is our most difficult system, it’s a 6 credit hr course with a lab, and I was scared to take it. But, i ended up really liking it!) 28 - What was your favorite film of this year?

I haven't been to the movies in years. I prefer Netflix/Amazon prime and watching from the comfort of my bed/couch. 

29 - What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Turned 23. I studied for an exam, but got to celebrate with my family 2 weeks later. Lots of good food and cake!  30 - What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

If I had the wisdom I have today at the beginning of this year (2017) haha 

If people were kinder to each other. 

31 - How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?

scrubs 90% of the time. business casual or professional 5% of the time. Leggings, sweaters, sundresses, boots/heels, long dresses, etc. 5% of the time.  32 - What kept you sane?

family, Netflix shows, shopping, traveling.  33 - Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Pietro Boselli *heart eyes*

34 - What political/social issue stirred you the most?

Healthcare equality, DACA/immigration issues, net neutrality

^ Im going to keep MdA’s answer because yes!! 35 - Who did you miss?

My maternal grandmother who's been dead for 6-7 years now, but I still think of her some times. Also, my best friend who’s moved to another state for grad school.  36 - Who was the best new person you met?

I became closer to someone in my class this past year and I love hanging out with her. She is always so cheerful and optimistic. I love that about her. 

37 - Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017:

Trust your intuition and don’t settle. 

#year in review #2017 #need to reflect #heres to 2018

[ashavant]

The American University System: Oppressing the non-elite.

So let me get this straight...in the 70's there was a community outcry to lower the amount of tax money that got put towards college tuition for future generations? American tax payers used to cover over 70% of college costs, allowing the young students straight out of highschool the ability to work a minimum wage summer job to literally pay their entire tuition. Those with part time jobs while in school were not very common. This allowed for an ability to succeed without the unnecessary baggage of financial stress and lack of sleep at 18 years old while taking 14+ credits, which for those of you who dont know is a true 40-60 hour work week alone. All of this hard work and achievement paved the way for these kids to enter adulthood as educated, debt free, and with the world at their fingertips. Not to mention, they had the incredible privilege of not having to become a self sufficient adult in the middle of the worst economic crisis since the depression...

Compare that romantic reality to our drastically different reality today. I will use my experiences as an example for this, while probably on the extreme spectrum of experiences, they are valid and carry merit nonetheless. I was always told as a child, "you have to go to college, its not an option" Yet, when i graduated highschool, my parents grew quiet. I grew up in a 5 person household in Orange County, CA (one of the most expensive places to live in the country) in a family who made roughly $40k a year, give or take (thats poverty folx). My step-father was an electrical contractor so income was often spuratic. Anyway, needless to say they had not one penny saved for my college tuition. My parents failed to put a single penny aside for anything regarding my well-being honestly. With no car, no money, no job, and no idea when or how I could recieve a college education, I was kicked out of my parents at 17 years old with nowhere to go. I couch surfed and was able to get a couple jobs, one at a crafts store and one at a sandwhich shop. After 2 long years of working my way out of homelessness, all I wanted was to start college! So, at age 19 I applied for financial aid. However, I was told because I was under 25 I needed my parents tax information. Well, my parents never filed on time and were incredible dodgy with communication. So, after months of going back and forth I ended up paying out of pocket for a full time coarse load at a community college. I was able to work my jobs and pay this, but with nothing left over for rent or food. I ended up getting kicked out of my place, had to apply for foodstamps, and had to start over from square one. Little did I know I would have to wait 5 years before I could finally give college another shot.

I had almost given up the idea of higher education. I was making good money in the food industry at this point and had a nice company car and a great home with an awesome roommate. But then, I met a boy. We traveled the country for three months with his bluegrass band and saw 32 states. Afterwards, we again found ourselves broke and homeless. We hunkered down, worked 80+ hour weeks, saved up, and moved to Portland Oregon, "where young people go to retire". Little did we know, retire would be the LAST thing we did when we got there. Cost of living was rising in Portland, but still nothing compared to Orange County, CA. We got good food jobs and nested for about a year. My boyfriend (we will call him N) got great grades in highschool and high test scores in his exit exams, so in 2014 he chose to get back into school as a Music Composition Major at age 26. His journey is a whole other terrible story. I wanted to return to school so badly, but knew I had to wait until I was old enough to not warrant my parents tax info. Finally, at age 24 I filed my FAFSA and went to a career counselor. I was directed in the career of Civil Engineering. Having no prior knowledge of this career or topic, I dove in blindly headfirst. I chose a community college due to the fact that I barely finished highschool and did not take ant exit exams. To my surprise, I did very well in my college settings. After one year I was able to transfer to a university! Me! I WAS GOING TO A UNIVERSITY! I could not believe it, and was soo excited. I had no clue how hard this would be, not the work, but just surviving through it. I should mention here that I have a mild dissability. I have endometriosis which is a chronic illness linked to hormones, ovarian cysts, and all that jazz which can result in disabling pain and in my case an emergency surgery from time to time. I also suffer from a mild form of PTSD. So, with those alone handling high stress loads can be very hard on my mental and physical well being.

Ok, so I was a 24 year old first generation college student (first person in my family to go to college) disabled lower class person wanting a higher education. Seems logical right? Well, once I got accepted to the university, I chose to change my major to Architecture, I had taken an intro class for general ed and fell inlove. My beginning of my first year was great! Lots of lectures and reading. Aside from my tuition multiplying literally 3x from my community college tuition which did not affect my financial aid disbursement, I was fairly stress free. Now keep in mind, my partner and I are both working 20-30 hour weeks to make ends meet while taking 12-14 credits. Its basically having 2 full time jobs. Anyway, the last term of my first year came around-my first studio class. I was so excited! Time to actually do architecture! I got the syllabus and was told was supplies were needed to be successful in the class. I was also told that doing all of the requirements for the assignment would result in a C grade, if any grade above that was desired extra work had to be put in. I thought, no biggie, bring it on. The next thing she said was, "absolutely no sleeping in the studio!" Thats when I had a feeling I was gonna be in trouble. After class I went to the art store got my supplies. I almost started crying as they read my total to me: "$682.80, please." And that was with my student discount and not including all of the future supplies I would need just for that term, which I will tell you now after all the drawings and models ended up being about $2,000. That is a whole lot. These studio classes also require many all-nighters just to have enough time to complete the assignments. Many times, due to having to work outside of school I could not complete my assignments or had to do them with less craft and care than I would like just to turn it in. This year, I recieved less in financial aid, my rent has gone up significantly, tuition went up, and there are new grade requirements: if you get anything less than a B-, youre immediately dropped from the school of Architecture. So, not completing assignments isnt an option anymore. This last term costed my much less money, but once I told my instructor I was out of money, his response was, "well, this is Architecture school." What the fuck am I supposed to do with that!? A roll of Velum (drafting design paper) costs $50-$70 pencils are $2 a piece, models cost like $100 each, the list of tools go on and on. I am already paying $10k a year for tuition, ensuring at the very least $70k of debt including my masters degree which you need to get your Architecture license. And at least $100k with the $500 a month I need to borrow a month for rent. I should not need to add thousands more of that for supplies my school should be providing. And this insane pressure of pulling all nighters to get done the amount of assignments it would take us to do in a whole week last term in 2 days!

The moral of this very long story is that college is not meant for those of us trying to climb the life ladder. Its meant for the already elite. Its meant for kids right out of highschool with parents who make enough money to pay their tuition, their rent, their whole lives! Meant for kids who travel to Europe for the summer instead of working 60 hours a week to make up for the money lost during school cuz you physically cannot work more than 25 hours. Its meant for kids who can call their mommies and complain about how mean their teacher is, not for those of us who cry every night about being afraid of ending up back on the streets in the snap of a finger. Its meant for kids who can work and think about school all day every day, not those of us preoccupied with being able to pay all of our bills and being able to afford food and health insurance.

HOWEVER, even if you are like me, worse, or better, YOU CAN DO IT! I have a damn 3.7 GPA. I may only get 3 hours of sleep a lot, cry almost weekly, probably have lost years of my life due to stress, and feel scared for my health, but shit IM FUCKING DOOOOIN IT! Even though our government, or school presidents, and pretty much everyone in power disagrees, you are so worth it and you are so capable of success no matter how much harder you have to work than everyone else. Because we have to work so much harder now, we will get to party that much harder when we make it. I WILL GRADUATE IN SPITE OF THE SYSTEM! I WILL SUCCEED IN SPITE OF THE SYSTEM! I WILL CHANGE THE FUCKING WORLD CUZ I AM A BADASS AND CAN DO ANYTHING YOU PRIVELEDGED FUCKS CAN DO, JUST BETTER!

#university #college #university system #academic witch #academia #opression

[sdmn-edits]

1-200

200: My crush’s name is: I don’t actually have a crush anymore😂😂199: I was born in: June198: I am really: weird197: My cellphone company is: Vodafone - it works where i go on holiday so it does me just fine 😂196: My eye color is: it changes - like sometimes its blue, green, grey and a mixture of blue and green - it’s weird .195: My shoe size is: 3 or 4 (5 at a push)194: My ring size is: I’ve never actually had it measured so idk 😂😂193: My height is: 5ft 5 - I’m growing lads!!!192: I am allergic to: waterproof plasters, bee/wasp stings (only mildly though - like i won’t die but just turn into a massive red ball), some soaps, most makeups, chalk and face paint.191: My 1st car was: I can’t even drive yet 😂😂190: My 1st job was: I don’t know if you would class this as a job but for my work experience, I worked at a cafe for two weeks. 189: Last book you read: Jane Eyre (one of my faves)188: My bed is: single - like me😉😂187: My pet: (s) two cats, (which my mum named) one called Mike and the other called Matt. I also have a pony called William (Billy for short)186: My best friend: @paigexxixo @sdmn-md @minibaeminter @wroetoredman @line-sidemen @mintersmini @wroetojill and a girl from irl called Catherine - i couldn’t choose one so have a few of my faves185: My favorite shampoo is: John Frieda Frizz Ease184: Xbox or ps3: PS3 cos I haven’t played XBox183: Piggy banks are: expensive bacon182: In my pockets: by Morrie (who kinda sounds like Marzia which is kinda scary?)181: On my calendar: is my exams😂180: Marriage is: okay? I haven’t had my wedding yet so I don’t know?179: Spongebob can: dance the best.178: My mom: likes to name animals weird names. 😂177: The last three songs I bought were? A candle, some chocolates and a shock absorber.176: Last YouTube video watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSAeOhCrv_s175: How many cousins do you have? About 14 give or take 😂 174: Do you have any siblings? One - my sister (she’s 17 - 2 years older than me)173: Are your parents divorced? Nope.172: Are you taller than your mom? I’m the same height maybe a lil smaller 😂 171: Do you play an instrument? Not currently, no. But I can play the drums, recorder and piano/keyboard (not perfectly but alright)170: What did you do yesterday? I played in two tournaments and had a back massage.[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: Idk 😂😂 168: Luck: Yeah I guess.167: Fate: Yeah. 166: Yourself: Mm not all the time 😂😂 165: Aliens: Yeah.164: Heaven: Yeah.163: Hell: Yeah.162: God: Yeah definitely.161: Horoscopes: Some.160: Soul mates: I guess? 😂 159: Ghosts: Yeah.158: Gay Marriage: YES! UNFOLLOW ME AS I DO NOT CARE, I BELIEVE IN EVERYONE HAS RIGHTS TO MARRY WHO THEY WANT, WHEN THEY WANT FIGHT ME IF YOU WANT!!157: War: Definitely not! 156: Orbs: Yeah I guess?155: Magic: Some 😂 [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: Hugs153: Drunk or High: Neither - I don’t do either of them.152: Phone or Online: Depends.151: Red heads or Black haired: Both are equally as cute150: Blondes or Brunettes: Both are equally as cute149: Hot or cold: Warm.148: Summer or winter: Winter147: Autumn or Spring: AUTUMN! IT’S THE BEST SEASON EVER!!!!!!!146: Chocolate or vanilla: Both together cos I’m a weirdo like that 😂😂 145: Night or Day: Night - I love looking at the stars tho I do like to cloud watch from time to time144: Oranges or Apples: Apples.143: Curly or Straight hair: Straight142: McDonalds or Burger King: Maccy D’s all the way😂😂 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Not really a fan of chocolate if I’m honest 😂😂 140: Mac or PC: PC for generic stuff, Mac for editing139: Flip flops or high heals: Neither.138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Ugly and rich so I can give money to charity etc137: Coke or Pepsi: Neither136: Hillary or Obama: Obama135: Burried or cremated: Either, I don’t care I’ll be dead 😂134: Singing or Dancing: Neither 😂😂133: Coach or Chanel: ??132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: ??131: Small town or Big city: Both130: Wal-Mart or Target: Neither 😂😂129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Both are hilarious 😂128: Manicure or Pedicure: Neither 😂127: East Coast or West Coast: ??126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Both?125: Chocolate or Flowers: FLOWERS!!124: Disney or Six Flags: DISNEY!!123: Yankees or Red Sox: ??[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: shouldn’t be a thing.121: George Bush: needs to grow up.120: Gay Marriage: I FULLY SUPPORT IT - UNFOLLOW ME IF YOU WANT!119: The presidential election: irdk? I don’t watch it.118: Abortion: it’s people’s choice117: MySpace: ??116: Reality TV: don’t watch it115: Parents: some do a lot more than others to provide for the kiddas114: Back stabbers: fuck you, ain’t nobody stabbing me in the back113: Ebay: it’s cool, you literally can get anything and everything off of it112: Facebook: it’s okay?111: Work: as in job? do what you wanna do, not what your mum or dad says.110: My Neighbors: very funny. 109: Gas Prices: you make my grades jealous - going up.108: Designer Clothes: i don’t really where designer 😂😂107: College: i like the look of the one I’m intending to go106: Sports: I LOVE THEM (except netball, benchball and basketball - please don’t hate me, i’m just short and i struggle 😂😂)105: My family: they are okay, just fam really.104: The future:i don’t tend to think much of it, i just let it happen 😂😂[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: like 10 mins ago102: Last time you ate: like an hour ago101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: A guy called Daniel (I didn’t see him until last week but I didn’t see him since November)100: Cried in front of someone: Idk 😂 99: Went to a movie theater: Last year - to watch Finding Dory98: Took a vacation: idk 😂 97: Swam in a pool: last year 😂 96: Changed a diaper: never 😂 95: Got my nails done: last august for a wedding - never again94: Went to a wedding: the same wedding 93: Broke a bone: two years ago 92: Got a peircing: two years ago91: Broke the law: never 😂 90: Texted: half an hour ago[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: lots of people 😂😂 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my bed 😂 87: The last movie I saw: Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs 2 - Ik i’m a kid at heart, don’t judge 😂 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: leaving school85: The thing im not looking forward to: my exams and tomorrow84: People call me: lodes of shit, I ain’t gonna name ‘em all but some people know what they say.83: The most difficult thing to do is: waking up in a morning82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: nope81: My zodiac sign is: Cancer80: The first person i talked to today was: Mike - the cat but if we talking about people - my dad 😂😂 79: First time you had a crush: 3 years ago78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: nobody, i’m very open 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: idk 😂😂 76: Right now I am talking to: @paigexxixo  about bridge to terabithia 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully a graphics designer74: I have/will get a job: hopefully soon73: Tomorrow: school72: Today: sleep71: Next Summer: be fit70: Next Weekend: hopefully ask one of my friends from tennis their details69: I have these pets: cats and pony68: The worst sound in the world: nails dragging on chalk board, people smacking lips, people clicking pens, people shouting, people crying, people laughing, gun shots, explosions etc67: The person that makes me cry the most is: nobody 😂😂 66: People that make you happy: I could list forever65: Last time I cried: earlier - i was watching a vid of these boys crying and it just gets to me64: My friends are: lodes of people - most i have listed before63: My computer is: an acer62: My School: ??61: My Car: Audi A3 2010 model 1.6l?60: I lose all respect for people who: are homophobic, transphobic etc, people who hurt animals and people etc59: The movie I cried at was: ?? 58: Your hair color is: blonde57: TV shows you watch: that 70′s show, merlin, sherlock, heartland, doctor who, phineas and ferb, spongebob, tom and jerry, loony tunes56: Favorite web site: idk 😂😂 55: Your dream vacation: Guernsey, Jersey, Rome or Geneva54: The worst pain I was ever in was: when i either broke my arm,  or when i fell off a horse and dislocated my knee and cracked two of my ribs or when i fell off a different horse and almost broke my back53: How do you like your steak cooked: i don’t eat meat or fish 😂😂 52: My room is: 8 year old me’s bad desicion51: My favorite celebrity is: Johnny Depp50: Where would you like to be: some place else49: Do you want children: not particularly48: Ever been in love: nope47: Who’s your best friend: lodes of people46: More guy friends or girl friends: guy friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: people44: One person that you wish you could see right now: @paigexxixo or @sdmn-md43: Do you have a 5 year plan: nope 😂 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: nope 😂 41: Have you pre-named your children: nope😂 40: Last person I got mad at: *people: Looserpool 39: I would like to move to: either Guernsey, Jersey or Geneva38: I wish I was a professional: tennis player or sleeper 😂 [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: Caramac36: Vehicle: Car (Tesla Model S P100D)35: President: Obama34: State visited: none - I’ve never left England33: Cellphone provider: Vodafone32: Athlete: Jessica Ennis-Hill31: Actor: Johnny Depp/Leo DiCaprio/Patrick Stewart30: Actress: Emma Stone29: Singer: ??28: Band: ??27: Clothing store: ??26: Grocery store: ??25: TV show: I have lodes24: Movie: I have lodes23: Website: I have lodes22: Animal: I love them all21: Theme park: I’ve only ever been to Flamingo Land20: Holiday: Yorkshire Dales or Whitby19: Sport to watch: Football (Soccer)18: Sport to play: Tennis17: Magazine: ??16: Book: Either Jane Eyre or I Capture The Castle15: Day of the week: Saturday14: Beach: idk 😂😂 13: Concert attended: I’ve never been to one 😂 12: Thing to cook: I like to cook all sorts 😂 11: Food: I like all sorts 😂 10: Restaurant: ??9: Radio station: ??8: Yankee candle scent: idk 😂 7: Perfume: idk 😂 6: Flower: Rose, Lily or blossom5: Color: Red or black4: Talk show host: ??3: Comedian: Michael McIntyre, Jack Whitehall, Peter Kay or Russell Howard2: Dog breed: Border Collie1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Yes!!!!

[imsarabum]

Responses to {Part 26} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU Asks~

Please ‘Keep Reading’ to find my response to your ask ^^ As always, I have copied and pasted all asks into this post in regards to last night’s chapter to avoid clogging up people’s dashboards and to avoid spoilers for those who may still wish to read the chapter. Thank you ^^

(I have also included asks that I received in the hours before IWSY was posted ^^)

Anonymous said: I was having a really horrible day. And that's when I realized IWSY is getting updated tonight and it hasn't been as bad as a day as expected!^^  On a side note, do you like 2PM? I just wanted to see possibly. If you do, what is your favorite song? Thank you for being so awesome! 💕😘

I’m sorry you are having a really horrible day *hugs* but I hope IWSY can make you smile a little bit! And yes, I like 2PM, but is it bad to say that my fav song was 10 our of 10? LOLOL I still listen to it occasionally :3

Anonymous said: can't wait for the new iwsy chapter :)))

Yay I hope you enjoy it!!

@hemhings said: I won't be able to read I Won't Stop You tonight because I'm on nightshift, I'm so upset about this!😭😭😨

Awww babe I’m sorry you’re working nightshift! :( that really sucks ugh :( but don’t worry my love, Jungkook will still be here for you when you get home!! :3

@ktaegyo said: okay i just had my first part of final exams today and I fucked it up but then I stumbled upon your story and read all 25 chapters at one go lmao. bless you, thank you for making me feel better. I love you

I’m sure you didn’t fuck it up my love, I’m sure you did the best you can do! *hugs* but I’m really happy that IWSY made you feel a little better, and I love you too :D

@fangirlunnie said: IWSY can have hundreds of chapters and I wouldn't get tired of it 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

Oh god I don’t think it will have hundreds of chapters xD But it is turning out to be quite long! I never expected the story to take my to all these different places and ideas xD But thank you so much beautiful :3

@adoppelna14 said: Every Tuesday I have this strange urge to tell you that I am waiting for the new Chapter of IWSY😂 and it's no joke. A lot of times I look at the date and I'm like, Oh no it's not Tuesday yet. And every Tuesday morning it's like, why can't it be night already?😂😭

Please never lose this strange urge because I really love seeing people get excited (cos I get excited too!!) hehe ^^ I really hope you’ll enjoy this one ahhhh c:

Anonymous said: Bc i live in the Netherlands i have to wait till 10:30 bc the time is 1 hour behind, but still I always stay awake for IWSY and I always go to sleep after i read it bc Tuesday is the longest school day i have whaha

Awh bless you that’s so late for you I’m sorry! :( But I hope that tonight’s chapter will be a good one :3

Anonymous said: iwsy is literally the highlight of my day... no lie. my university classes have already stopped for the summer so i have nothing to do today.. and iwsy hasnt come out yet.... so all i did was nap. i woke up, checked the time in the uk, went back to sleep, and checked the time again. you got yourself a dedicated reader here!!!!

You’re literally so cute I’m screaming xD But I’m so jealous that you’re already finished Uni for the summer! I really hope you like tonight’s chapter :3 thank you so much for reading IWSY!!

Anonymous said: IWSY has reached its final ark right? I'm so exited for the last chapters. ^0^

Maybe, maybe not! You’ll just have to wait! :D

@warriorinhealing said: Can I just say I'm literally sitting at the edGE OF MY BED just waITING for IWSY to update 😩 this story is so good and my friend got me into this and I don't regret(okay kinda of bc my emotions are played a lot in this story) and I jUST !!! 😭😩 I don't ship chim and tae but this story makes me wonder if I should and I love yoongi but this story makes me waNNA FITE HIM SO HARD and I want him to cATCH MY H A N DSS !!! and you just write so good 😭 sorry that this is long, I'm vvv emotional

Ahh you’re so cute thank you so much! I’m really happy that you got into IWSY and that you’re enjoying it :3 Tbh i ship tae with everyone lmao he’s so loveable and full of affection ^^ I hope you’ll enjoy tonight’s chapter my love!! thank you so much :3

Anonymous said: First of all, i'm going to calmly say that you are a wonderful writer and that new chapter is no joke. I also want to say something else. Pardon my french, but:  WHAT THE FUCK?  I almost started sobbing.... But its fine... Ill just wait another seven days to see what happens.   [I've never cried from fanfiction before so this was a nice surprise. Thank you for being such a great writer and continuously uploading IWSY. Just thank you~💕]

Hehe :3 thank you so much for saying that ahh~ i’m so happy you read it and liked? it! lolol :3 thank you so much dear!

Anonymous said: fuck.

same tbh

Anonymous said: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

YES

@jauntyjin said: IF U KILLED JIMIN ILL BE SO SAD

WHERE DOES IT SAY JIMIN DIED

@talkmemeytome said: Omg im ACTUALLY crying at iwsy youre such a great writer oh gosh

aaaaaaaaah thank you so much yay!!

Anonymous said: I AM SHOOKETH. OH MAN. THAT WAS SO GOOD. YOU'RE PLAYING WITH MY HEART STRINGS. JESUS

You’re so welcome hehe~ thank you very much!

@mysr3 said: Sara!!! Am so MAD at U rn!! That Yoongi bite not supposed 2b on Y/N ahh😖what!!! Am so upset Omg! Ok I know u r the queen of Cliff hanging but this is just the most painful one I ever had! Glare hard at u girl! Nice chapter! My emotions r all over the place again thx to u! Can u spare us n give us reassurance that everything will b okay! Plzz I need this! My tears keep on falling TT Thank you! I Love U n Ur Blog❤️❤️❤️ but should I continue LOVIN U after this hmm 🤔 Hav a good Day Sara! ❤️ Ps I like how u portrayed Y/N to b kind of bad ass this time! But Jimin!!!! Why~

It’s okay~ everyone’s mad at me :( Don’t cry! Keep reading! hehe :) And Y/N has always been bad ass ^^ But she definitely went overboard and couldn’t control her anger in this chapter I think^^ thank you so much for reading my love!

Anonymous said: 😯🙁😢😭😵😱  ☝basically how i felt while reading this chapter haha BUT DAMN NOW I REALLY NEED TO KNOW HOW THIS WILL TURN OUT I NEED NEXT WEEK TO ARRIVE (but also no because it'll be one week less to my finals) can't wait for updates!!! Hope you have a great week 😘

Next week isn’t that far away! and same I feel you i have so many tests and finals and assignments that I feel like crying forever lolol thank you so much for reading my love!

@ayedemi said: i'm crying istg, i need more of IWSY, i'm in London with school next week and i will miss it bc they don't know for sure if we have wifi ): but i wanna say ILY byeee ♥︎

Ooooh I will also be in London next week! *shifty eyes* hehe but I hope you’ll enjoy IWSY if/when you get a chance to read it :D

Anonymous said: I know I just forgave you for playing with my heart but now I'm afraid I'm gonna have to take it back becaUSEWHYDIDUKILLJIMIN?!WHYDIDYOUKILLTHEMOSTPRECIOUSTHINGINMYLIFEHUH?!HEWASJUSTAYOUNGVAMIREANDYOUJUSTWERELIKETIMETORUINTHEFUNSORRYMATE?!IFONLYICOULDKEEPMYSTUPIDMOUTHSHUTANDNOWJIMINISDEAD!!!IMSUPPOSEDTOWRITEAPAPERTHATSDUE T O M O R R O W AFTERREADINGTHIS?!THISISTOOMUCHFUDGINGANGSTFORMYPOORFLUFFYHEART?!IHAVEMORETOSAYBUTIMRUNNINGOUTOFCHARACTERSSOILLENDWITHTHIS-IH8USOMUCHRIGHTNOW!HMPH- Vampnip anon

Question; where in the chapter did it say Jimin died *confused face*

Anonymous said: ... .... ..... ...... I Hate  You So Much Right Now HOW.COULD.YOU.DO.THAT.TO.ME Is it sad that I don't actually care about my character I'm just really sad about jimin 😭

no Jimin don’t dieeeee!

@ohheyitsebonyrose said: Omgg Sara!!!! That chapter I'm actually crying! T-T you're such an amazing writer! It's my 18th Birthday tomorrow (well for me; April 13th) and I go see Got7 next week I'm so excited!!!

Happy Birthday to you my love! I hope you have an amazing 18th birthday AND OMG YAY YOU’LL HAVE AN AMAZING TIME! I’m also seeing GOT7 again in May and June and I can’t wait sdfghjk they’re literally the only thing that is stopping me from drowning myself somewhere lol. Thank you so much for reading IWSY my dear, it means a lot to me :D

@sundaymorningblues14 said: I have never felt this amount of anxiety over a fan fiction. But I made it through, and even though my poor heart is beating way too fast right now, I am happy I didn't stop reading it.. Thanks Sara x

I am glad you didn’t stop reading ^^ because everything will turn out just fine!! Thank you so much my love, and I hope you have a wonderful week~

Anonymous said: DUDE THAT CHAPTER I'M ACTUALLY CRYING REAL TEARS RIGHT NOW THIS ISN'T A DRILL HOLY SHIT DUDE I CAN'T TAKE IT I JUST

This is not a drill - this is a real emergency

@im-that-chesire-jax said: OH MY FUCKING GOD IM IN TEARSSSSS

*hands you a tissue* because same

Anonymous said: THAT ENDING! NO! I AM ACTUALLY IN TEARS,, holy crap you're so good at writing i admire you! also! how many chapters are left?

Thank you so much my love! You’re so kind to me :D And I have no idea, I’m sorry!

Anonymous said: NO GOD PLEASE NO. YOONGI DID NOT DO THAT. THIS STORYLINE IS SO CRUEL.

The world is a cruel place my friend

@animeimmortal said: DO YOU MIND WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO KILL JIMIN AND LIKE WHAT WAS THAT ENDING. MY SON IS DYING RIGHT NOW WHAT HAVE YOU DONE LIKE WHAT IS THIS I Don't know what I was expecting tbh bUT IT WASNT THAT THou I was expecting a fight to break out and the detailed descriptions? Amazing I love reading them they make the whole thing seem so real you're so tale ted aNYwAY MY SON IS DYING THERE OMG WHYTYYYYY ❤❤❤

Where does it say Jimin died? :o hehe thank you for liking the detailed descriptions and i’m really happy it seemed real to you ^^ NO JIMIN DON’T DIEEEEE! Thank you so much dear ^^

@jeonjungkooksshi said: You're an amazing writer! IWSY IS AMAZINGGGGG and the latest chapter... ughhh too much for my weak heart! LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT WEEK!! <3

*blushes* thank you so much my love c: that means so much to me!

@the-golden-jhope said: I WANNA FUCKING DIE YOU CANNOT END IWSY LIKE THAT IM CRYING OH MY GOD I CANT WAIT A WEEK

1. Don’t die pls - 2. I just did~ hehe THANK YOU for reading :D

Anonymous said: OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IWSY PT 26 WAS SO SPICY!!!!!!!!!!! DAMN UNNIE!!! fuck i hate cliff hangers but, in this case it's totally understandable. omo, my hearteu my hearteu. Unnie, do us all a favour, STOP MESSING WITH OUR BIAS LIST!!! lol, You deserve around of applause. Can't wait for Tuesdays!!!! hwaiting!!!!

Hot hot spicy! hehe thank you so much for reading the update and I’m glad it brought you pain/pleasure ^^ hehe

Anonymous said: BSKSKSNDND MUMSY IM ACTUALLY CRYING AT THIS IM SCREAMING WHY WOULD YOU OH GOD IM IN NEED OF SERIOUS COMFORT WHY WHY WHY IM SOBBING NDKDKKDEM I CANT EVEN BREATHE I'M CRYING IM NOT READY FOR NEXT WEEK IDKSKEND MUMSYYYYY WHYYYYYYYYY

*comforts you* shhh it’s okay~ it’ll be over soon~~ hehe thank you for reading it my love!!

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: oK i'm crying like a little bitch yet again bc of IWSY. the pain is highkey worth it though i'm in love with this story. if i owned a time machine i'd go to next week fr

it’s okay I cry like a little bitch every day~ it’s gr8 hehe ^^ thank you for being in love with iwsy ^^ i’m so happy that you’re enjoying the updates lovely!

@platinumbreak said:  Thank you, you made me lucky haha my exams went well. I hope yours will too. I talked about your writings to a friend and she has been reading it for 3hours straight, she is not even answering anymore haha Ps: This chapter is just amazing thank you for writing and making our life happier haha ×

I’m so happy i could give you a little bit of luck! and I’m glad to know that your friend has seemed to immerse herself in the story too :3 I hope she likes it! thank you very much for reading!

Anonymous said: I'm not even gonna begin to lie, there's actual tears in my eyes after ch26 like, fuck it has me so emotional I'm such a soft pillow I just want everything to turn out okay Jesus Christ I'm sitting nd crying why u gotta do this to me

trust me,I was crying when I wrote parts of that chapter ^^ hehe~ *hugs you* thank you so much for reading the update!

@killingalltheflowers said: Omg this chapter was too much. HOLY SHIT YOU KILLED JIMIN, MY LOVE. YOU MONSTER (I still love you) A-AND NOOO NOW THE READER IS GOING TO BE BOUND TO YOONGI. UGH I- I CANT. I'M SO UPSET ABOUT EVERYTHING. YOU FREAKIN GODESS OF FANFICS. T^T Also this chapter was gorgeously written.. T^T

Where does it say Jimin died?! lol ahhh I’m definitely not a goddess but thank you so much for reading and enjoying the chapter, it means so much to me :3

@oramleon said: sara i'm fucking crying right now what the HELL was that update??????????? WHYYYYYYY

I’M SORRY OKAY

@theninjachan said: "Yoongi smiled – baring his teeth and gums as if he found something to be terribly funny."  YOOO I THOUGHT OF YOONGI'S GUMMY SMILE IN THIS LINE AND CAN'T HELP BUT GIGGLE BUT HOLY FUCKING SHIT I AM TEARS RIGHT NOW THIS HAS BEEN YOUR MOST HEART WRENCHING CHAPTER YET. I NEED A MOMENT.

Yoongis gummy smile melts my heart every single time fuck-- TAKE YOUR MOMENT ITS OKAY I UNDERSTAND hehe but I hope you enjoyed it my love ^^

Anonymous said: sara you KNEW everyone was gonna be upset what do you mean "some scenes may be upsetting" i was balling my eyes out the entire time

Shit u rite~~ BUT I HAD TO WARN OKAY YOU CAN’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF

@moonlighthollow said: OMG NO NO NO WTF NO PLEASE OMG  OK I'm done..😐 I'm an emotional wreck😭 she can't just..... yoongi can't just... oh geez i don't even know what to say  AND JIMIN😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 Why u doin dis to me ? My poor heartㅠㅠ (i love your writing tho♥)

Shhhh it’s okay...shhhh now *hugs* eheh thank you so much for reading this chapter even if it was a little sad!

@doubletroublesince1994 said: OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU DID NOT OH LORD HELP ME BREATHE I DID NOT EXPECT THAT HOW THE FUCK DID THIS HAPPEN BECAUSE HELL I DIDNT ANTICIPATE THIS IM SHOOK

I’m glad I could surprise you in the worst way c: hehe thank you for reading once again my love!

Anonymous said: Hi, how many chapters will IWSY have? 💕

I’ve answered this question a million times before and Im sorry but I have no idea! :D

@wearelivinglegacies said: I'm NOT OKAY OMG I'M SO CLOSE TO CRYING RN LIKE WHAT AHHHHH FIRST JIMIN AND NOW Y/N!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I'M SO ANGRY AND SAD AND THIS STORY IS SO AMAZING THANK YOU, BUT ALSO WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEE???????? I can't wait for the next part this story has me on the edge of my seat 😭❤

I apologise for any hurt I’ve caused hehe~ thank you so much for being on the edge of your seat, and thank you so much for reading too! :D

@noceurash said:I knew bad things would happen in this chapter but I'm so... gffhu DEAD INSIDE,, my poor sweet boy jimin (I have such a soft spot for this boy why would you hurt me like this ;^;)) and tae too aaah my heart is breaking. Not to mention bby namjoon not wanting to hurt anyone im crying inside. You've hurt my soul this chapter. It's so good ((hurting me but good)). I hope you have a lovely day~~ I love you!!! <3

All the soul and heart hurties :c hehe i hope you’ll have a lovely day and I love you too! thank you so much for reading the new chapter sweetie!

@wastedtaehyung said: WHAT THE FLIPPJNG FUCK DOFMDCKMS KWEKSLXKQOS (Y/N) AND JIMIN WHAT WOFMWKDK APLDLQD NOW I HAVE TO WAIT NEXT WEEK WIFNSKDMSKSKWMS FUCKFKCMSKLAXMLWFKLW

you’re welcome :3

Anonymous said: nOOOO SARA NOT JIMINNN T_T. i expected it but you still got mehhh feeeeeels. your stories are just so emotional and thats exactly whats so great about them ;-;. ive always thought about how these ideas pop up in your mind. :3

:3 i’m so happy that you find it emotional to read, because i find it emotional to write! as for ideas, they just come to me randomly? dreams, through lyrics and poetry I write, i don’t really know^^ thank you so much for reading dear :D

@bekzzz said: Holy Shit. Just.... holy shit. Tuesday can't come fast enough!

hehe thank you so much my love!

Anonymous said: straight up forgot that iwsy was coming out today 😭. I'm moving houses so everything is super stressful but i read the chapter and suddenly I am at peace. -tall anon

i hope moving house goes quickly for you! stress is no good~ thank you so much for reading the new chapter tall anon! ^^

@m1n-yoong1 said: The amount of times I've gasped and screamed reading IWSY pt 26 is unreal, your writing always amazes me and I look forward to the next chapter 🙌🏼🙌🏼💖💖

awh thank you, that was so sweet and you made me smile ^^ thank you so much for reading the new chapter love!

Anonymous said: damn sara these cliffhangers tho 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

u know me xox

Anonymous said: I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you 😡

It’s okay. I hate myself too.

Anonymous said: There was a part where you mention how she was essentially able to give life and it was in italics so she can bring Jimin back to life, right? Also if Jungkook marked her in some vampy way, does that mean that Yoongi's plan won't work? Please say yes! 🙏 Joon is gonna be okay too, right? I don't like death. Death is sad. I don't like being sad.

When Jungkook said he marked her, it was sexual innuendo as in - he has already gotten her pregnant ^^ hehe I hope everything turns out well in the end c: ~ thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: I'd like to assume that Yoongi can still be redeemed, because o love each and every one of them. That seems a bit too unrealistic, doesn't it though. 😔

We’ll just have to see what happens! But just remember that it’s not real haha Yoongi’s image is just being used for a character I created! It doesn’t depict him in any way ^^

@thenotsogrownupeldest said: I was screaming reading the ending of IWSY latest chapter! I even wish I was some kind of supernatural being that can intervene that heartbreaking scene and save both jimin and y/n.. you my friend, are a terrific writer. I love you but I slightly hate you right now for the ending. I need a moment to calm my non-vampiric soul from this intense scene.

Jump into the story and save everyone! hehe ^^ thank you so much and I love you too (even tho you slightly hate me) c: i’m glad you liked? the update!

Anonymous said: HOW COULD YOU

WHAT DID I DO

@wanda-rog said: I'm speechless...I really wasn't expecting that...Jimin better be okay next week! You're so good at leaving us all on the edge! I bit all my nails reading that chapter and now I can only hope for Jimin to survive and WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE BABY AND IS NAMJOON OKAY AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN OVER ALL, angst aside that was a really cool chapter I'm seriously looking forward to next one, thanks for always updating on time and lengthy chapters too, you go Sara xx

I hope he’ll be okay too! hehe all the questions, hopefully you’ll get answers soon c: thank you so much for enjoying it and reading the new chapter dear, it means a lot to me ^^

@coppertopging said: Omg i totally forgot it was tuesday until i saw your update! This chapter had soooo much going on!! I have so many questions, but got so many answers, but I can't help but want... no... NEED more of this story! Is it terrible that i just never want it to end?!

trust me, al the days have merged into one for me. I have 4 assignments due and numerous exams to have and I’m losing my grip on reality lolol please kill me :( thank you so much for reading as always dear, it means the world to me.

Anonymous said: Holly Tony Molly SARA DA FEELS ARE SO STRONG stop making me cry why did u kill Cristian Chim Chim :/// I just cant wait for next week arggggh *sobs* I freaking love how all of this is so angsty 💞 --wifey anon

hello wifey anon! Where does it say I killed Jimin? ;o thank you so much for reading my love!

Anonymous said: [[SCREAMING]]

*whispers*

Anonymous said: [Error 404] u cant kill chimchim u just cant why ?!😞😞

Where does it say I killed Jimin? ;o

@jynxy24 said: What. The. Hell. Shit feelings. What are feelings anyway? Do feelings even exist? WHY THE HECK YOU GOTTA DO THAT SARA WHY?! I'm happy that Namjoon is good. WE WERE CORRECT!! And damn, badass reader omg. I MISS BADASS VAMPIRE MOM!! Also, if Yoongi frickin doesn't turn good at the end, Istg Sara. Anyways! Thanks for the greatttttt chapter! Stay awesome :3

FEELINGS DONT EXIST :D hehe thank you so much for reading the new chapter ^^ i’m really happy you enjoyed it Jynxy :D

@shineeshawol204 said: So I just read chap 26 of I Won't Stop You, first of all, bitch - I mean that in the nicest way possible - second of all, your writing style is phenomenal! During the fight scene I was letting out audible gasps as the events were unfolding and I feel like I am actually watching it. There's zero gaps in your writing, I am left without questions (other than why bis, ugh the pain I feels) as to what's happening and just ugh, wonderful. Also my friend i sent it to is only on pt.3 and I need someone

Ahh thank you so much I’m so glad you enjoyed the fight scene! I had such a fun time writing it tbh lol to hear you say that there’s no gaps in my writing, it’s really a massive compliment to me. it’s always something i’ve been afraid of happening so thank you so much! thank you a million times ^^

@cheeto-puff-gem said: what the FUCK WHY THIS WHY T H I S

I DON’T KNOW WHAT

Anonymous said: OH SHIT Y/N IS GOING TO BECOME A VAMPIRE (stares intensely at April 18th on the calendar AKA NEXT TUESDAY)

but what if SHE DIES

Anonymous said: ONCE AGAIN YOU GOT ME ALL THE WAY FUCKED. ONE JIMIN NOT DEAD. IF HE DIE IMA LOSE MY SHIT AND TWO Y/N NOT GONNA BE YOONGI'S SLAVE CUZ SHE BELONGS TO JUNGKOOK. it's midnight and I'm laying in the bed crying RN cuz like why? Why you do these things? 😢😢😢 My soul is hurt. I feel as though the world needs to end because Lil mochi is dying and WHAT ABOUT THE FETUS? Baby fetus me is in there like wtf mom calm ya tits and where's my dad? You keep hurting me w/ cliffhangers but I love u 💜~LilKookieAno (cont.) P.S. on a real note I'm dead ass when I say the baby should be named after me. 💜 ~LilKookieAnon

Don’t worry baby fetus i’m sure you’ll be okay! hehe hopfully everything will work out okay in the end :D i love you too sweetcakes~ thank you so much for reading part 26! i hope you enjoyed it even though it was an emotional one :3

@blryface said: I'm honestly so shook at part 26. Like, oh my god I'm speechless. You're such an amazing writer and I anticipate every Tuesday when you update! I can't wait to see how things turn out but DAMN YOU GOT ME FUCKED UP

ahhh thank you so much honestly ^^ i’m so happy you liked it and that you look forward to new updates my love! and i’m sorry if i got you all fucked up hehe

Anonymous said: NO NO NO NO SARA WTHEFUCKWHY TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW IM GONNA AAAAAAA

I called you an ambulance!!

@sunnyoongi2 said: I JUST FINISHED THE NEW CHAPTER OF IWSY AND IM SO HURT I LOVE IT SO MUCH IM CRYING JIMIN!!! NOOO

hehehe thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK JIMIN OH MY GOD IM CRYING BUT ALSO NAMJOON AND IM SO TIRED IT'S TOO LATE ON A SCHOOL NIGHT TO BE THIS EMOTIONALLY DISTRAUGHT OH MY GOD

GO TO BED YOU NAUGHTY CHILD!

Anonymous said: NUH UH HONEY. That is all. (In response to IWSY Part 26)

UH HUH HONEY YES MM

Anonymous said: OH MY GODDDD. IWSY CHAP 26 GOT ME SCREAMINGGGG!!! THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE 💜💜💜

AHH YOU’RE WELCOME AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!

Anonymous said: WAIT WHAT

*waits*

Anonymous said: Yeah just slap me right into the feels take my heart will ure at it whats the point of living if softie Jimin is dead 😩

Where does it say Jimin died?!

Anonymous said: What is this pain that I feel in my chest?

Life

Anonymous said: my poor hearteu

*comforts you*

@lostheretics said: oMg iM HAVING A HEART ATTACK WTF YOONGI???????????? I NEED HELP IWSY IS KILLIN ME

hehe~ you’re welcome for the heart attack! :3

@koreaisanaddiction said: SARA NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! not thatt!!!!! im so sad!!!!!!!(cont.) I THINK I KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT!!! I HAVE THEORIES!!!

*sneaky laughs* I guess you’ll just have to wait to see if your theories are correct! ^^ thank you for reading lovely :D

Anonymous said: you ripped my poor soul in half with iwsy why, why must you bring pain and do this :(   poor jimin my heart

I apologise for all the pain :( but I hope you’re still enjoying the story my love!

Anonymous said: I just cannot with chapter 26, this feeling is so indescribable, no words can explain the pain when I read the last few paragraphs, OMG NO PLEASE DONT TAKE HER AWAY FROM JUNGKOOK PLEASEEEE!!!! ಥ╭╮ಥ

Hopefully everything will be okay!! Thank you so much for reading my love ^^

Anonymous said: oh my gosh Sara chapter 26 was so saddening but so good!!! JIMINNNNNN please tell me a miracle will happen and he won't die!!! and let's hope the mark made by jungkook makes a difference and it is strong enough to overcome Yoongi's... I don't want evil yoongi to become my master T.T btw I've written in a couple of times as anon, but how about I label myself as bunnykookie96 from now onwards :D yes, I'm a 96-liner. may I ask what's your age too? ^^

The reference jungkook made to a ‘mark’ was a sexual innuendo because he got her pregnant haha ^^ and yay bunnykookie96! I am also a 96 liner~ my birthday is 12th of January!! :D

Anonymous said: IDC ABT Y/N RN WILL JIMIN MAKE IT AKSKSKKSKK PLEASE OH MY GOD I STILL NEED TO SEE THAT VMIN SIDE STORY

I PRAY THAT ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE GODBLESS

Anonymous said: im fucking having theories in my head right now loool but i cant put it into words i will wait for the next chapter to see if im right hoho and btw is this ending? :( i feel like im reading a book holy shit i dont want it to end :((

I can’t wait to see if your theories will come true!! And nope, not yet. There’s still a bit to go~ But I’m glad that you’re not getting bored of it! I was afraid that people might get bored of it because of the length of the series haha :( thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: HOW COULD YOU DO THAT JIMIN WHHHHHYYYY the tears currently streaming down my face could create a lake for him to relax in LIKE WHHHYYY DID U DO THIS TO ME WHY COULDNT YOU JUST TAKE ME INSTEAD he was so young so bright so precious just full of love I'm so sad WHY JIMIN!!! New drinking game!! Drink an entire bottle of wine everytime you cried during this chapter ☹️

Jimin you should have stayed out of it!! Take him? Where did he go? Who said he’s dead? ;o hehe~ thank you so much for reading the chapter my love ^^

Anonymous said: I just looked at a picture of Min Yoongi the love of my life and I? Got mad at him?? Like??? You asshole???? Why couldn't you just stay in the basement of your god damn mansion and let everyone live happily????? Like damn I had to remind myself that I'm not dating a vampire and Jimin didn't actually get stabbed and that I need to stop reading outside because I look crazy crying on a park bench THANKS SO MUCH SARA YOU REALLY STABBED ME IN THE HEART THERE

Awwwwh no! Don���t be like that~ that’s not how Yoongi is - I’m merely just using his image to fit a character that I made! Yoongi is a sweet person for sure :D hehe i’m sorry if I made you cry :( but i hope you enjoed the chapter nonetheless ^^ thank you so much!

Anonymous said: Omg ch 26 was brilliant! All I can think about is what's going to happen to y/n's unborn baby ahhhhhhh >.< my heart goes out to jungkookie, his biggest fear became true. I really loved this chapter and the loved the way you conveyed namjoon's struggles! On another not,I really admire you for updating on time! Thank youuuuu for writing an amazing story that contrary keeps us on our toes. I love it and hate it at the same time lol.

Thank you so much my love! that really means so much to me, you’re so, so sweet thank you so much *hugs* I really hope you’ll enjoy the rest of the story and I’m glad you liked this chapter ^^

@dont-hyuck said: Fuck I'm trying so hard not to ugly sob after this chapter ooooohhhhhh someone help ease my aching heart 😭😭😭😭💔💔 I hope everything ends up right at the end I am so attached to this story it is one of the most wonderful things I have ever read and I mean that with my entire being. Please don't ever stop writing I love you so much 😭😭😭😭💖💖💖💖💖💖

I was ugly sobbing while I was writing it haha :( I hope everything ends up all alright too! awwh thank you so much my love, you have no idea how much your words mean to me! I don’t ever plan on stopping so you don’t have to worry :3 thank you and I love you too my dear!!

#I Won't Stop You #IWSY #Asks #imsarabum