#i think i had one from an anon in my inbox but it disappeared sorry my friend :( | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mysicklove · 10 months

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i had the most unhinged thought and raced to your inbox because i need this demon expelled from my body asap. hawks coming home from the worst day of patrol, everything went wrong and he had to speak up at a press conference, play the part of perfect, and all he wants is to melt into your touch. you can see it in his eyes, the dark circles, and the weary tilt of his smile. "baby bird," his voice is hoarse, "need you to hurt me tonight," so he can finally unravel. you're the only one he wants to be perfect for. okay goodbyeee 💀

𝐔𝐍𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐕𝐀𝐒

Pairing: Masochist! Hawks x Gn! Sadist! Reader

CW: face slapping, lots of blood, cock stepping, kicking, bruising, cock slapping, heavy degration, loss of air, mean reader, tons and tons of tears, scratching, mouth spitting, no mention of safe word but keep in mind it is there !!!

A/N: anon im sorry i totally changed ur thing, i just saw masochist hawks and sprinted. the demons wrote this, not me. dont look at me everyone. HEED THE TAGS

it was a way to blow off steam. something that he looks forward to, just some time where he doesn't have to think anymore. only feeling he has the stinging sensations and the tears that prick his eyes. it was an embaressing obsession he had. he loved pain.

Keigo walks to the bedroom, his hero costume tattered, and dark circles under his eyes. he is exhausted, but coming to you for your touch. pulling you close to him, and mumbling into your neck how bad he wants you to hurt him. till he bruises and bleeds. till every thought just disappears except for you.

and so you pull away, and slap him. it makes him tumble backward, and his yellow glasses fall off. he touches the tingling feeling on his face, blood spilling out from the skin caught on your wedding ring. you dont let up, sending another loud smack across his face, and this time he does fall to the ground, landing on his ass.

tears prick at his eyes, and he can feel his lip tear open. the taste of blood coats his mouth and he gulps, looking up at you for more.

he feels your foot jab onto his clothed cock and he keens, wincing up at you. "w-wait," he stutters, throwing his head back when your press even harder. "fuck!"

"wait? you want me to wait? after you begged for it like a dog?" he is squirming under you, tears now streaming down his face as you dig your foot into his pants.

"'m sorry. sorry—you are going to kill me!" he pleads, hands trying to dig themself into the carpet to fight back against the pain.

you sigh, and let up, instead using your foot to push at his chest, causing him to fall over and onto his back. "take off your clothes, Keigo," you mumble, taking a seat on the bed with crossed legs and staring down at him.

"okay. okay. I will. Just give me a minute!" he pants, tearing off his jacket and shirt as fast as he can. he knows something is coming, you werent playing nice.

you dont give him enough time, he reaches for his pants, and without hesitation you slam your foot into his stomach. he goes tumbling backwards and lands on his side, curling into a ball and panting. his eyes are wide and he is gripping onto his adomen. it surely will leave a huge bruise tomorrow. but thats not what he is worried about, he cant breathe.

"awww, did you get the wind knocked out of you? that's what happens when you move too slow," you tease, as you take in his appearance. he trembles in front of you, looking up at you in fear. tears drip down his cheeks and onto the ground, as he tries and fails to catch his breath.

you giggle at him, padding over to him. he flinches at the footsteps, bracing himself for another kick, but you just begin to unbutton his pants, pulling them down. "useless thing, arent you. cant follow any directions," you coo, now tearing off his boxers.

his cock springs out, tip red and leaking pre cum. "such a pervert! you sick fuck, keigo. who gets hard from getting beat?" you land another slap to his thigh, and his whole body jerks.

you smile at the red handprint, glancing back at him to see him beginning to drool. its coated red from the blood from his cheek and lip. he's is still heaving from the kick, eyes wide, and body gasping for oxygen.

"say Hawks do you get turned on when you are losing against villains? pop a boner like a freak for anyone who hits you?"

his eyes flash to you and he is shaking his head desperately. his words are breathless, "no. no. 'm not a freak!"

a quick, but harsh slap to his cock. he jumps again, globs of tears falling quicker. "fuckkkkk," he whimpers, shaking his head back and forth. his whole body shakes, and fingers dig into his own skin.

"you liar! do you want to be kicked again?"

"no no no no. im sorry. im sorry! im a freak. a pervert who likes to get hit. im sorry," he sobs, reaching for your ankle for comfort. you slap it away and he hisses, rubbing the back of it with a sniffle.

but you smile at him and lean over to sit on his chest. his head is still lolled to the side and his body racks with sobs. "shhhhhhh. so whiny Keigo. thanks for admitting it. my disgusting pervert. here, a reward."

you grab his face, hard enough to bruise, and force him to look up at you. his eyes are half shut in a wince, but he tries to force them open to look at you. you pry his mouth open, lean forward, and drop a glob of spit into his mouth.

he doesnt hesitate to swallow it, opening his mouth up again and sticking his tongue out to show you its gone. "th-thank you," he whimpers, and you smile fondly at him.

you hands trail up and down his down his body, sending vicicoius red raised scratchmarks along his pretty skin. "now, pervert....what should we do to this pretty canvas?"

he grins up at you, tears still dripping, and blood staining his cheeks and lips, but still stars in his eyes. "anything."

#mello.writes #thirsting hours #keigo x reader smut #dom reader #sub hawks #hawks x reader #hawks smut #keigo smut #keigo x reader #sub keigo #sub tamaki #keigo tamaki x reader #mha smut #hawks x reader smut #hawks x you #x reader #reader insert #dom! reader #n/sfw

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ingravinoveritas · 1 year

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Hi Amy, I'm the cursed anon who asked Neil lol (and I guess I'll stay anon for all my life after what happened today). I just wanted to thank you for what you wrote. I was sure my ask would have reached your blog somehow, alas. I don't know what to say, I'm mortified, it's been a rather hard day for me, since I felt completely misunderstood and belittled by someone I looked up to. I'm sorry because I must have phrased my ask in a weird way, an even "creepy" one, it seems.. By the way, I'm so glad you didn't find anything creepy in that, because I don't know for the life of me what I said that was perceived that way. I spent the entire day thinking about it and, at the same time, I tried to distract myself from shame. I don't know how to describe it, but this answer made me question so many things, about my mental health too, and I definitely didn't need that. He could have just said that he didn't quite understand what I meant, instead he only made me feel stupid and fed me to the lions. I mean, of course I know that season 2 is wrapped for example, I just wanted to tell him that maybe this sort of casting might be a future problem for season 3, and that I hope it won't be an issue for season 2, even though I saw many people turning up their nose already. (As I also bloody know that David Tennant and Michael Sheen are actors playing a part, evidently this is not what my concerns were!) I really don't know how to better explain it, English is a hard language to convey things sometimes. Neil doesn't speak any other language than it, and it shows honestly, because he doesn't know how hard it is for someone who is not native; me asking that might have been an impulsive decision, but I really tried to do my best with the language, it was hard, and it's like he pretended he didn't understand nevertheless. I don't know, I'm so disappointed by such a response. I thought it was more likely that he just read and didn't answer, but that condescending response? I didn't expect that. I'm sorry that I made him so sour/sharp/harsh (I don't know which adjective is the more appropriate in this case, and it drives me crazy that it can take so little to be misinterpreted, that's what I was referring to) because evidently I must have offended him or hit a nerve, which was not my intention. I might have been stupid to ask that, but if the ask was so annoying to him, it's not like he was obliged to answer it and being so cruel at the point to completely distort its meaning. Do I regret it? I do, but maybe without all of this, I wouldn't have ever seen this side of him, and I'm for the truth, even if it always tastes bittersweet, so.. Good to know, I guess.

Sorry for ranting! Oh my god, I didn't realise, it's just that it's still an open wound to me. Coming back to you, I wanted to tell you that even if you might not agree with me (you have all the right not to), your response is actually the kind I expected from a man of power who is twice my age (just saying). Thank you for always being so considerate and tactful, you really did made me feel a little better. I wish there were more people like you in the world, I mean it.

(Sorry for the disappeared ask, I deleted the account after sending it, thinking that it would have stayed in your inbox once it was there.. Well, I was wrong haha. I'm going to delete it after you answer then, I had reactivated it just because you turned the anons off and I wanted to thank you instantly <3)

Hi, Anon. Oh, I am so sorry for what you went through yesterday. I'm also floored to have you reach out to me, as I didn't even realize you were aware of my blog, but I thank you for doing so and sharing your thoughts/feelings with me.

It saddens me so greatly to know how much Neil's response has hurt you, and how it has affected your mental health. If the comments on my post about what happened are indication, however, you are definitely not the only one who felt that his response was not okay. What you said about feeding you to the lions was something one of my followers also mentioned, and whether Neil intended it or not, I would have to agree with that assessment.

The fact is, Neil is a writer. He knows how powerful words can be, and how suggestive. So by calling your question "creepy" in that first sentence, he is creating the lens through which the reader is going to view your question. And so what I would say is that two things can be true here, which is that 1) You have every right to feel the concerns you do, but trying to engage Neil about it was probably not the best idea; and 2) Neil has the right to feel/say what he wants, but deciding to answer your question the way he did instead of simply ignoring it was also probably not the best idea.

I don't know if you've been on his blog at all today, but Neil actually went into a bit more detail about his rationale, re: the use of the word "creepy" in the comments on this post, as part of a back-and-forth exchange with another fan who again brought up the issue of nepotism. I thought I would highlight these two comments in particular:

What I was struck by in the comment on the left was two specific things: 1) Neil's mention of the "undertones" to your question. Going by what you wrote, Anon, as well as the message that you've written here, I do not think there were any undertones to your Ask--with the possible exception of calling Neil's character into question (which, if he was hoping to squash that, it is now beyond ironic that his response to you has achieved the exact opposite); and 2) That someone who has been described as "so Tumblr" and "Neil gets it" would somehow be oblivious to how venomous people can be on social media, especially when encouraged by the creators of their favorite works, and why someone would therefore not want to make themselves a potential target. In just the first sentence of his response to you, however, Neil proved exactly why you were right to use a burner account.

In terms of the comment on the right, we see Neil draw a false equivalence between your question and people criticizing him for casting POC actors in Sandman. This was (in my opinion) Neil doing this fan what he did to you, which is twist around what they were saying as a means of deflection and avoiding answering the question that was actually being asked, which was about nepotism. The other irony for me is him talking about people accusing him of having a secret agenda, while he was the one doing the same thing to you. The only difference is that his assumption ended up having serious consequences, as we are now seeing.

I think you did hit a nerve, Anon, but--as strange as it may sound--I don't think it had anything to do with you. My feeling is that there is something going on with Neil and he is using Tumblr as an outlet--much in the same way that Michael used Twitter as an outlet in 2019/2020. So I do not think you are "cursed" or "made" Neil be salty/harsh--I think he was already this way and took whatever is happening with him out on you. Because if everything was absolutely fine--if what you were mentioning in your question was totally ridiculous and Neil was entirely unbothered by it--I do not think he would have answered it, nor would he still have been engaging this fan about it for hours afterward.

I know this probably won't be of much comfort, and I am sorry. English is not my second language, but I am autistic, and I relate very deeply to what you described about searching so hard for the right words (which is probably why it takes me forever to answer my Anons) because of not wanting to be misunderstood. And I know very well what it's like to have someone you so greatly admired turn out to be not at all what you expected, especially when everyone else's perception of that person is so wildly different.

It is for that reason that I can understand fans on here and Twitter rushing to defend Neil, not wanting to feel that someone they love could possibly do anything wrong. "Neil is a human being" is a comment I've seen frequently...but if we are going to say that Neil is human, then that means he is imperfect. It means he makes mistakes. And it should not be controversial to say this. I've also seen people in the aftermath of this saying how kind Neil is to the fans...but his response to you was unkind. Setting someone up to be a target is not kind. Neil has so many people who write into him who are dealing with mental health issues and concerns, and at best his response to you was thoughtless...but at worst, it sends a message to other fans that they, too, could become targets for absolutely no reason. And while I do not believe that Neil owes the fans anything, having an awareness of the power he wields and a sense of basic human decency does not seem like much to ask.

You do not ever have to apologize for ranting to me, Anon. I'm so glad that what I wrote in my other post helped you to feel better, even if just a little. I am by no means perfect--far from it--but I've been in enough fandoms and had enough heartaches to know that I would want to do anything I could to spare someone else from going through the things I went through. The shame here is not yours for asking a question that yielded a disproportionate overreaction from Neil--the shame belongs to the people who piled onto you because of it.

I want you to know that I was truly touched by your compliments, and that you felt comfortable enough to be so vulnerable with me here. I'm sending you lots of love, as well as the hope that we can continue to have honest discussions about these subjects. A lot of people are with you, and believe me when I again tell you that you are not alone. xx

#anonymous #reply post #good omens #good omens 2 #neil gaiman #michael sheen #david tennant #also FWIW I do agree with you Anon #regarding the nepotism #especially when it comes to Georgia and AL #but that's a whole other post for a whole other day #the GO fandom has meant so much to me since 2019 #so all of this has been so disquieting on so many levels #my heart hurts #fandom woes #discourse

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risquefanfics457 · 2 years

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uhh... Josuke getting his s/o some stuff when they are on their period. Gender neutral if possible. (Sorry for asking to often for Josuke stuff, you write him so well! 🫧)

Love, Bubble Anon

Welcome Bubble Anon! That's totally fine, you are actually just feeding my Josuke obsession. Which always needs more Josuke. Thanks! Don't hesitate to drop something in my inbox if it's open! Anyway!

Pharmacy troubles (Josuke x reader)

Pulling up to the pharmacy, Josuke took a quick look at the text you had sent him.

‘Advil and Super plus’

What did that mean? Size?

‘Of what?’ He replied.

The text sat unread and Josuke finally put the car into park and went inside to go look for himself.

First; find out where the feminine hygiene stuff was.

He scratched his head, “Jeez, where would I even find that?”

Josuke peered down the aisles. Seasonal stuff, hair care, nail care. Makeup, over-the-counter medicine, snacks, condoms…

“Well,” He made his way down the family planning aisle, “That’s sorta in the same area.”

The shelves were full of odd things that he’d never seen before, condoms, but flavoured, and riveted. Self-warming lubricant, and oddly shaped toys that he quickly steered away from.

“Good lord, how much stuff is in this aisle?” He grimaced. Josuke pulled out his phone again and checked for a reply. Nothing.

He stopped abruptly. He almost ran right into a woman and another girl who he assumed was her teenage daughter.

‘OMG OMG OMG’ His inner voice screamed. “Oh! Sorry, I didn’t mean to run into you or anything.” He rubbed his neck and tried to play it off casually.

“No worries, young man.” The woman waved him off.

“Oh, thank you, uh have a good one.” He very awkwardly did a 180 and went back where he came.

Wait. “Ughhh… I forgot to get the stuff.”

In a very stiff walk, he went back to where he ran into the two ladies.

They seemed to know where the supplies were, maybe he could snake around them.

The woman spotted him.

‘Why me?’

“Oh, you’re back, are you?” She smiled, “Looking for something?”

“Uhh…” Josuke tried to bluff, but sighed in defeat, “Uh, my friend sent me to grab some things, but all they said was ‘super plus’.”

The woman smirked, “Ah, first time doing the run?”

He nodded, bright red.

“Sweetie, would you grab me my iron?” The lady asked her daughter. The girl, who seemed uncomfortable with sharing the aisle meant for girls with some random guy took her to leave.

“Alrighty, do you know what brand they like?”

“There are different brands?”

Much to his embarrassment, she laughed, “Okay, do they want pads or tampons? Or are they a diva cup kind of person?”

Josuke buried his face in his hands, “I don’t even know what that last one you said is…”

“Kotex works, and so does Always, but they’re different in how much they absorb.”

“Does it need to absorb a lot?”

The lady, who this time spared him the trouble, handed him a box, “Try this, it has tampons and pads in the same box. It’s a super plus.”

“Playtex?” Josuke read the words on the box, “And this will work?”

She winked, “Works for me. Well, I need to go to the cash register. Good luck.”

“Whoa, wait! Is there anything else I need?” He called

“Hmm… Chocolate and anything else you think she’ll like.” And with that, she disappeared.

-----------------------

“Okay, I’ve got painkillers, chocolate, pads, tampons, chips and a tub of ice cream.” Josuke proudly plopped the bag down beside you.

“Aw… babe!” You reached your hand in and pulled what you could out. “Huh?” You looked at Josuke quizzically, “Assorted flavour condoms, and cherry-flavoured lube?”

“Uh. That’s for… after.”

“How did you find all of this by yourself?”

“Uh, I bumped into an expert.”

“Oh. You bumped into a woman.”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

#josuke x oc #josuke x you #josuke x y/n #josuke x reader #josuke higashikata x reader #period fic #jjba x you

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always-andromeda · 1 year

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perhaps a white chocolate truffle + eddie? <3

your stuff helped distract me through a lot of my painful oral surgery recovery, so maybe something where eddie is helping his love recover from a surgery or an illness, or just any kind of fluff that you enjoy writing? :) i love your characterizations and writing style! <3

– 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐓𝐨 𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐎𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐞

𝐄𝐝𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐍𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐆𝐍!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: I'm so sorry this has taken so long to publish, anon!! but I will have you know that every time I went past this ask in my inbox, it made me almost tear up. thank you so much for your encouragement, dear. I hope that this blurb fits what you were looking for!

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: reader has their wisdom teeth removed, pet names (sweetheart), complete and utter fluff, nothing else I can think of!

Edward had been nothing but a pure sweetheart. If your jaw didn't already hurt, you were sure his attitude would've given you a toothache. The second you mentioned you were getting your wisdom teeth removed, Edward put himself completely at your disposal.

First, he insisted upon taking you to the appointment and back. Even though you argued that you'd just use a ride sharing service, he was all too eager to use up one of his few vacation days to help out. And as if that wasn't enough, he dumped even more of his time into the matter reading up on the recovery process. Edward had never been able to afford to go to a dentist. So his lack of knowledge was his excuse for hyper focusing on article after article from various medical journals for a few hours at a time.

By the time the day came, he sat nervously in the waiting room, almost as if he was expecting the dentist to run out, declaring that something had gone wrong during the surgery and they needed a volunteer. Edward had read so much that he was convinced that he could absolutely do it if he was needed.

Thankfully, though, the procedure went swimmingly. Before too long, you were wandering out of the exam room. Your gait was clumsy and slow; almost like you were lost. But the second your eye caught Edward's figure standing awkwardly by the front desk, you gravitated towards him. As he helped you pay, you were practically latched to him with your arms around his forearms.

The woman behind the counter ran through the recovery process, to which Edward only half listened to. He was far too preoccupied with the sound of you humming contentedly through the gauze in your mouth. And that would set the tone for the trip home as you came down from the anesthetic.

During the drive, you shifted wildly between trying to tell him about a dream you'd had the night before, tearing up at how nice the dentist had been, and pointing to random things on the side of the road.

He drove by a trash can and you pointed, calling it to attention with a muffled, "Trash!"

Edward rolled his eyes and mumbled, "That's right, sweetheart, that's a trash can."

He chuckled when you added in amazement, "Woooow." Yeah, it was definitely a good thing that you were safe with him and not at the will of some random Uber driver.

A little under half an hour later, Edward was ushering you into his apartment. You were finally starting to come back to reality a bit more and the pain was setting in. But of course, Edward had that covered.

He led you to the living room where his beloved recliner resided; already set up with a pillow and a blanket. He let you get yourself comfortable and disappeared into his little kitchen, giving you a chance to shake your head in disbelief. Why he was so willing to go above and beyond for you, you had no idea.

More than any other partner you'd had, Edward was incredibly attentive. There was no length that was too far for the poor man. And though you sometimes felt bad for how committed he was, you had to admit...it felt nice being looked after and cared for with such fierceness.

So as soon he emerged from the kitchen with an ice pack in hand, you gave him the fondest smile you could manage, earning a giggle from Edward. You quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Your mouth is still a little numb," he muttered, nodding at the lopsided smile that had crept up the side of your face.

Before you could feel silly for it, Edward brushed the matter away entirely by handing you the ice pack and instructing, "Here, hold this against one side of your jaw for about fifteen minutes. Then you can switch it to the other side and do another fifteen minutes. It should help with the swelling over the next few days."

You didn't know why Edward even bothered to mention the fifteen minute part. Because his eye was firmly on the clock the whole time and he reminded you to switch over himself. You did what you were told, not having the heart to express any sort of ungratefulness at how doting he was towards you. Because as much as you valued your independence, you knew how much these kinds of things meant to him.

Being able to take care of something or someone was the way he showed his love. So you kicked back and tried to let yourself embrace it. The only thing you wouldn't let him give you was the TV remote.

"I'm super tired, Eddie," you yawned. "I'm probably going to fall asleep anyways. You can turn on whatever you want."

Edward's wide eyes blinked at you. "Are you sure you don't want something to eat before you fall asleep?"

You sighed, "No thank you, sweetheart. I'm not hungry yet. Maybe after I have a nap."

Despite the fact that he had a couch in the same room, Edward settled beside your hanging legs on the floor. He reached up to hold your hand as he turned the television on, flipping through the channels. He laughed softly, "Alright. Whenever you do wake up though, there's yogurt in the fridge and applesauce in the cupboard that are both screaming your name."

Your eyelids fluttered shut and you caressed his fingers in your hand. "Lucky me. Can't wait..." you drifted off.

After a few minutes, Edward felt your grip on his hand soften. He laid his head back, finally allowing himself to feel a shred of satisfaction as you snoozed. There was no way in hell that he would ever let you go through anything alone. No matter how big or small the matter might be, Edward would always be ready to care for you as best as he can.

#chocolate box valentine event❣️#paul dano #danocel #danonation #the batman #edward nashton #dano!riddler #edward nashton x reader #edward nashton x y/n #edward nashton x you #edward nashton fluff #dano!riddler x reader #dano!riddler x you #dano!riddler x y/n #dano!riddler fluff #˚ʚ meda writes ɞ˚

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bbyquokka · 2 years

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you’re not my secret anymore, but my lover. ˖⁺｡˚⋆˙♥️

🦙: pairing: Hyunjin & f!reader

🦙: genre: smut, 18-? DNI! fluff and a bit of angst (possibly ??)

🦙: synopsis: realising your feelings for Hyunjin have become more that just friends with benefits, you came clean to everyone

🦙: warnings: cheating, unprotected sex, bondage (hands bound), degrading names, (slut, whore) pet names, reader is fucked dumb, orgasm denial, explicit language, fingering, clit play

🦙: words: 3.3k

🦙: a/n: part 2 of ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Got secrets i cant tell got requested so i thought, why not do it! i already had some ideas before i got the request but didnt know if i should write a continuation, so ty anon for requesting! thank you for all the love on the first part as well 🥰 as always, likes, reblogs and feedback is always welcome! lmk if i missed anything in the warnings and ty!

🦙: side note: i got a message from an anon shortly after i posted p1 claiming that because i write about cheating, they’re going to assume i cheat irl. Please note that what i write about, doesn't imply this is how i think or feel about SKZ and how I feel about certain topics. my work is fictional! There are warnings for a reason. you do not have to like my work, that is fine. you cannot appeal to everyone's taste, however, please do not think it is okay to come to my inbox and message me something like this. just simply scroll past my post. Myself and other writers aim for constructive feedback. Please think before you send messages because it can be demotivating. Thank you.

🦙: master list

"Hyunjin.." you breathed out. "Please, i cant take it no more!" A chuckle erupted from the man who was currently situated between your legs.

"i warned you what would happen if you carried on (Y/N) you want to behave like a brat, you will get punished like on." he growled lowly before licking a slow and long strip from your entrance to your clit, sucking and nibbling it gently. you whined, tugging at your restraints. your hands are currenly bound together by Hyunjin's belt.

Hyunjin licked, nibbled and sucked on your clit, hands on your inner thighs pushing them apart as well as stopping you from closing them around his head. you was sensitive, your body on fire as waves of pleasure rippled through your body, toes curling. Hyunjin pulled away and licked his middle and index finger. you watched him through hooded eyes, chest rising up and down rapidly due to your laboured breathing.

Hyunjin slipped his saliva coated fingers into you, hissing at the warmth and tightness that welcomed his fingers. he thrusted them in and out, starting of slowly, gradually picking up the pace. he curled his long fingers inside aiming for the sweet spot. Your eyes widen as loud moans in the form of his name rolled off your tongue indicating he hit it. he smirked and began to rub fast circles on your clit with his thumb.

"Let me touch you, hyunjin. please! im sorry, i wont do it again. just let me free." you cried out, hot tears welling in your eyes. hyunjin licked his lip slowly, eyebrow raised as he watched you turn red with frustration, your pussy clentching around his digits

"i told you, (Y/N) behave like a brat, you get punished like one." you thought it would be a good idea to tease hyunjin in public. you'd innocently brush your hand over his crotch, occasionally giving it a light squeeze. you'd look around and when you was sure there was no one around, you flashed your breasts at him, giggling like a naughty school girl.

hyunjin warned you more than once. on the 5th warning - he should have just warned you 3 times, thinking you learnt - he dragged you to the nearest hotel, stripping you off your clothes and binding your wrists together with his belt. He started to play with your breasts and pussy, denying you of your orgasm and the ability to touch him. to say you was frustrated, was an understatement.

the famillar knot that was forming soon disappeared as Hyunjin removed his fingers, licking his fingers and humming at the taste of your wetness. "you always taste so good for me." he groaned. you mewled at his words, pussy convulsing. you wanted to cum so bad that it was getting painful for you.

"You're being such a good girl for me. Have you learnt your lesson? when i warn you more than once and you dont listen, this is what happens." He cooed at you, stroking your hot, flushed cheek. You nodded fast, the room spinning slightly. "Use your words princess."

"I've learnt my lesson. Please, i need you so bad, it hurts." You begged. Your body was trembling slightly with desire, tears falling down your cheek as you chewed your bottom lip. Hyunjin licked his lips, loving the way you begged and pleaded for him. He loved how he has made you like this. He wasnt a possessive person but something about you made him want to have you all for himself. He knew that that wasnt allowed considering you was still with your partner, even after all these months of you two sleeping with each other behind their back.

Stripping himself of his clothing, he flipped you on your stomach. Your head lay on the hotel pillow, your bound hands inbetween your legs, under your stomach. Hyunjin positioned himself behind you, grabbing your hips and lifting you up on your knees. You spread your legs apart, giving him full view of your aching pussy, which was coated in your wetness, clit red and swollen and your inner thighs decorated with purple bruises.

You shook your ass at Hyunjin, giggling cheekily before letting out a yelp as his hand came into contact with your flesh followed by a loud slap. "You're so cheeky, (Y/N) You know how to rile me up and as much as i want to continue to tease you and hear you beg to cum, im at my limit."

Hyunjin grabbed his hard cock, tip red and coated with pre cum. He gave it a few strokes before teasing your entrance, rubbing his tip against it, coating it in your arousal. You shook your hips more, indicating that he should just put it in already. He chuckled before pushing his length inside, the glorious burn from the stretch causing you to moan and shiver. No matter how many times you two go at it, you'll never get use to his size. He pushed himself inside until he was balls deep, groaning at the warmth and tightness of your pussy.

"Move." You whispered. Hyunjin grabbed your hips and started thrusting slow before picking up the pace once he heard how frequently you was moaning out. His hips smacking against your own, the grip on your hips tightening as Hyunjin positioned himself, aiming for the squishy spot. Your eyes widen as he hit it, causing you to moan his name loudly in a string of curses.

Hyunjin moved one hand down your spine and into your hair, tugging it roughly. You was overwhelmed by the pleasure that you lost the ability to think. Your mouth hung open in a O shape. drool falling past your lips. Your throat becoming dry with the endless amounts of panting. The only words you could form was "Hyunjin" and "Good".

"My, my. It looks like i have fucked you dumb, yet again. My little slut, going dumb for me, for this cock that you love so much. You such a cock whore, (Y/N). It shows with how well this dirty cunt is taking me in." You whimpered at his dirty words, feeling degraded but you liked it when he spoke like this to you. It helped you and him to chase your highs faster. You've learnt that Hyunjin is the type of person to want to cum together with his partner.

Your pussy clenched around him tightly, Hyunjin's movements sloppy. The knot was tightening in your stomach. All you could focus on was chasing your high along with Hyunjin.

"C-close. want to cum.." you whimpered.

"its ok. you've endured enough baby. Cum around my cock, princess." You nodded and allowed yourself to let go. You moaned Hyunjin's name loudly, body twitching as your walls clamped around Hyunjin's cock. Hyunjin moaned with you, movements coming to a stop as he painting your insides white, before thrusting into you shallowly, riding out both your highs.

He pulled out off you slowly, swallowing when his cum trailed out off you and down your thighs, dripping onto the sheets. Your legs became weak as you collapsed. you closed your eyes, basking in the glory of being fucked by a God. You felt sleep slowly taking over you before you felt a pair of strong arms flip you onto your back gently, unbinding your wrists and kissing them softly before picking you up bridal style and walking to the bathroom.

"Where we going?" you asked sleepily, head resting against his shoulder.

"Getting you cleaned up. aftercare is important after sex, baby. Anyways, you have to look fresh before you go back home." You nodded, biting your lip.

Ah. Home. Back to reality. Back to pretending and acting like nothing is happening. You was ultimately living a double lifestyle. You know you should break up with your partner, it's only fair and humane, but not only is the danger of possibly getting caught either by him or one of their friends, you didnt have the heart to break his heart. Which, to an outsider looking in, seems stupid. What you're doing, is the ultimate betrayal. But, you and hyunjin are just fuck buddies, no strings attached and all that. Right??

you tried to ignore it. you tried to convince yourself that your feelings was all because you was 'in the moment' The longer you ignored, the stronger the feelings became. You soon found yourself checking your phone every 5 minutes to see if Hyunjin had sent you a text, stalking his instagram, saving his photos, daydreaming about him. When you was away from him, ultimately living your double life, you craved him like a high schooler that had a crush.

Your relationship with your partner, however, started to become stale. You hardly spoke to one another, instead of eating at the dining table like you use to, you'd either be eating alone or sat with a lap tray in front of the tv screen. Things in the bedroom department became stale to. You didnt feel the need to have sex with them, purely because you was getting your insides ruined every other day by Hyunjin. If your partner made the first move, you'd make excuses "Im tired." "I feel sick" "Im not in the mood, maybe later." and when you did have sex, you'd often imagine it was Hyunjin, although it didnt help because your partner and Hyunjin treated you differently in the bedroom.

You soon realised that this wasn't just a friends with benefits deal for you anymore when Hyunjin took you out on a date. You lied to your partner, saying that you had to be away from home due to a 'work conference' when in reality, Hyunjin was taking you somewhere special, somewhere out off town to reduce the risk of getting caught.

The day started off with Hyunjin greeting you dressed in casual wear, holding roses. You felt your heart skipping beats, butterflies errupting in your stomach. You ignored the feeling, but as your day continued, they got stronger and stronger until you couldnt ignore it no more. It also didnt help that Hyunjin was treating you like a princess, buying you whatever you wanted, claiming that you're his princess so you should be treated like one. You had lunch at a cafe, talked about everything and everyone. The day ended with dinner at a fancy restaurant topped with endless hours of sex back at the hotel room.

You didnt want to return back to your old, boring life. You had such fun, being able to do what you wanted, be doted upon and not have to think about real life. Coming to the realisation that you love Hyunjin, you love him more than you thought you could ever love a person, that you had fallen hard for him, you debated on whether to tell him or not.

You was scared. Scared of rejection. What if your feelings were just one side, that this whole thing is just sex to Hyunjin. Nothing more, nothing less. But why would he treat you with such care? Like you're the most expensive diamond in the world that needs to be protected at all cost. You settled on not telling him, keeping it to yourself. You'd rather have him as a fuck buddy than not have him at all.

As time went on, your worries and concerns started to reflect and affect your everyday life. Your partner was starting to suspect something was going on, questioning you causing you to lie or deny everything. Soon after, Hyunjin started to suspect that something was wrong. He knew you better than you knew yourself.

"(Y/N)?" You hummed, looking up and taking the glass of water from Hyunjin. You was at his place, prepared to do your usual routine until hyunjin realised you wasn't mental there with him, so he insisted you both stopped, saying it didn't feel right.

So here you are, sat on the sofa wearing underwear and Hyunjin's t-shirt whilst he was just in underwear. You brung the glass to your lips, the cold, refreshing water coating your tongue and throat.

"What's wrong? You've been distance since you arrived here." You placed your glass down on the coffee table, licking you top lip to collect any left over water.

"Nothing, I'm fine." You gave him a fake smile, causing Hyunjin to raise an eyebrow.

"Oh really now? Who are you trying to convince? Yourself? It's best to talk to me (Y/N) i know you better than anyone else, than yourself. Whatever it may be, i'll try and give you the best advice possible." He placed a hand on top of yours, stroking it with the pad of his thumb. Biting your lip hard, you felt a lump in your throat. you looked down at your lap, hair hiding your face as you felt tears well in your eyes as you shook your head no.

Hyunjin lifted your chin up gently, his gaze falling on your features as his face fell slightly once he realised. "Hey, hey princess. Talk to me, it'll make you feel better."

"I cant." You inaudibly whispers, tears spilling down your cheeks

"Why?"

"Because it'll change us. Change this relationship and what we have going on. It will make my feelings a reality and i dont want that." You sobbed. Hyunjin wiped your tears away gently.

"Whatever it may be, whatever is going on in that head of yours, nothing will ever change us. You're special to me, an important part of my life and whatever is happening, will never change that. You hear me??" His voice was stern and sincere. You let the flood gates open, hearing his words made your heart ache and feel sick. You started crying uncontrollably. Hyunjin cooed as he pulled you onto his lap, legs on either side of him

You buried your head into the crook of his neck, tears wetting his skin. He rubbed slow circles on your back, hushing you softly as he rocked you back and forth. Once calm, you kept your head buried before whispering against his skin.

"What was that, baby?" Biting your lip and taking a deep breath in, cursing yourself for being quiet and having to repeat yourself, you sat up straight. Looking directly in his eyes, you melted.

"I love you." Hyunjin started at you blanky, blinking a few times, processing what you said. Time moved slow, your anxiety started to rise. You felt sick, you started to panic.

"Im sorry. I shouldnt have said that. It was crossing the line. Ah, why do i have to be so dumb and open my big, stupid mouth. Well done, me. you really fucked up. Ahhhh! i should've just kept my mouth shut and continued with what we already have because I'd rather have that than nothing at all because at least you'd still be in my life. I'll go back to my partner and my boring life an-"

Your rambling was cut off with Hyunjin bursting into fits of giggles. This time, it was your turn to stare at him blankly.

"You're so cute when you ramble. That's one of the many reasons as to why I love you too."

"Huh? w-what?" Your eyes widen a little, heart beat picking up as the butterflies in your stomach travelled along your body. You felt fresh tears well in your eyes, a smile forming on your face 'You - love me too..?" You asked carefully, hoping you didnt misunderstand.

Hyunjin nodded slowly, holding your waist gently under your t-shirt, his fingers stroking your delicate skin.

"I've always loved you, ever since i laid my eyes on you. I thought i was being greated by a Goddess with the beauty that radiated from you." You laughed softly, thinking back to the time where you thought the exact same thing about him.

"why didnt you say something?"

"Scared. Scared of loosing you for good. Came to the conclusion that it was better to act how we always have been. That way, at least i still have you, even if i did have to share you."

"So, what now?"

"Thats for you to decide, princess. You still have someone waiting for you at home. Someone you've known a lot longer than me. Just know that, whatever you decide, im here whatever the outcome may be. Understood?" You nodded. You had some decision making to do.

Stay with your partner. Someone you've known for a long time, who you've made memories with. However, things have been stale for you. You havent had your heart in the relationship for a while. You was just with them because you felt guilty - you was guilt tripping yourself, fooling yourself into thinking you could force yourself to love your partner again like you use to.

Upon hearing that Hyunjin's feelings are 100% mutual with your own, you mind was already made. It's Hyunjin you want, Hyunjin you need. You thinking about him 24/7. Get a rush of excitement whenever you see him. Butterflies constantly in your stomach. He treats you like a Queen and you fall in love with him all over again. All you had to do was tell the truth

which you should have done at the beginning.

A few days later, you and Hyunjin agreed to not see each other until the truth was out. You agreed that you would explain to your partner first before they would rush over and demand an explanation from Hyunjin. You just had to get the ball rolling. You both knew it was going to be rough, this is months of betrayal thats about to be aired out. To say you was nervous, was an understatement.

You decided to do it now, today. It was better to rip the band aid off sooner rather than later. Giving yourself a pep talk in the bathroom mirror, you pulled out your phone and texted Hyunjin.

you: okay. im about to rip this band aid off and tell them everything.. 😥

Hyunjin: ok baby. Just remember that whatever happens, im here. I love you xx 💖🥰

you: i love you too 🥺👉🏼👈🏼💘 xx

you put your phone away and walked out the bathroom, calming your breathing. Heart hammering against your rib cage, you approached your partner who was currently sitting at the dining table on front of their laptop.

"Hey.. we need to talk."

A couple of hours later, you knocked on Hyunjin's door, a suitcase and bag situated beside your feet. Hyunjin opened the door, instantly pulling you into his arms. it had been an emotional couple of hours for all of you.

You finally told your now ex partner what has been going on and how you really felt. They were understandable mad, upset, confused and heartbroken. You both cried, you feeling like you didnt have the right to cry because you willingly let it continue up to this point but that didnt mean you didnt care. You hoped that once everything was settled, you and your ex could still be friends however, you didnt see it being possible after he claimed he hates Hyunjin with his entire existence and he never wanted to see you or him ever again.

'You did good, sweetheart. Im proud of you." Hyunjin cooed softly, rocking you back and forth. You smiled slightly. "I know its not over yet, that its just the beginning. but its me and you from now on and i wouldnt have it any other way. I love you so much (Y/N)"

Hyunjin squeezed you causing you to laugh. "Hyunjin, cant breathee!"

"Oh, sorry. Im just so so happy right now!"

"Yeah, me too baby. Its just us two now." Hyunjin nodded before grabbing your belongings. You followed him inside his home, his dog Kkami, greeting you as hyunjin closing the door behind you both as you kicked off your shoes and hung your coat.

"Hey, (Y/N)" You turned on your heels as Hyunjin put your belongings down before smiling from ear to ear

"Welcome home."

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goosewriting · 2 months

Text

Dating Pyre

for some reason the ask disappeared from my inbox ;;-;; but luckily i had written it down. this was requested by anon (as a reply to this post):

In that case, I'd love general relationship headcanons with pyre? Just reader being all mushy mushy with him omg If this doesn't spark any inspiration though, feel free to ignore :))

summary: general relationship headcanons with Pyre

relationship: Commander Pyre x gn!reader

warnings: none

word count: 1.1k

A/N: im so sorry this took forever! i’ve been thinking about this ask every single day. i hoped that doing some good ol’ bullet list headcanons could get me back into writing, and i think it worked :D thank you sm for the request and the patience dear anon! hope you like it<3

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

— — —

Pyre likes to be in control.

He’s protective without being smothering.

He does have a reputation to uphold to after all, being a commander and everything

so PDA is off the table.

Any flirty comments and intimate moments are reserved for behind closed doors.

If you’re a civilian, he just straight up hires you so you can go with him wherever he’s deployed. You end up being his assistant, secretary or get a job at the hangar if you’re anything adjacent to engineering.

If you’re enlisted as a stormtrooper, he makes sure you’re always in his assigned squadron.

He definitely uses his position to make things easier for you if anything happens.

You’re not feeling well? He’s literally your boss, and you also share a bed, so he brings you tea and lets you sleep in.

Someone treats you unjustly? They’re getting a scolding from the commander before their shift ends.

You complain about it being a little cold in your office because the heater broke down and they haven’t sent anyone to fix it yet? It’s not only fixed by the next rotation, you also get an apology letter from the maintenance department.

All these gestures to accommodate you don’t come without consequences, though; he might have received a warning or two from his superiors after pulling something which was evidently in your favour.

You keep telling him to treat you like all other employees, but he just can’t help it. He wants you to be safe and comfortable.

Which really stems from a deep fear of you leaving him.

Pyre isn’t necessarily emotionally constipated or unavailable, but he has trouble processing Big Feelings sometimes, especially when you’re nearby.

He’s scared he’ll lash out at you and take out his anger on you when a mission went badly, or when he’s having a bad day, and that you’ll be scared of him or even disgusted by him.

So before he gets to his quarters in the evening, he’ll try to let off all the pent-up steam; be it more proactively through physical exercises, or sometimes by lashing out at the poor stormtrooper that happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. He also may or may not have put a few mouse droids out of commission.

Since he does all this when you’re not around, it takes you some time to not only come to know of his actions, but even more to figure out what’s happening.

Once you sit him down to assure him that he’s allowed to have bad days and be frustrated and angry, and that you’re not going to think less of him because of it, he learns to deal with it better.

If it isn’t regarding any confidential missions, he might actually seek out your advice on how to deal with things, and you’re more than happy to help.

Once the doors are closed and the helmet comes off, though, it’s like he’s a different man.

When you sleep, he clings onto you.

He loves to wind down by sitting down on the floor between your legs with his back to you as you sit on the couch, his head resting on one of your thighs as you run your fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp. You tell him about your day while you do this. He sits there with his eyes closed and letting out the occasional grunt or sigh, but be assured he’s listening intently, mentally making notes here and there to ask you about later on.

Pyre is very thorough with the upkeep of his golden armour and equipment, and you’re the only one allowed to clean his helmet and blaster in the rare occasion he’s unable to do it himself.

As for pet names, if you’re into that, I think he’d call you sweetheart or darling. You mostly stick to his first name since you’re one of the very few who even knows it, but you like to call him Commander Tin Can when you tease him.

He’s also very attentive to your physical needs, and quickly picked up on your cues for hunger, sleep, etc. Sometimes it seems like he knows what you want even before you realise yourself.

As for himself, it took a while for you to learn how to read him. When in commander mode, he’s quite stoic and distant. But the moment it’s just the two of you, he relaxes. It’s subtle, but you learned to read his body language, and now you also notice when he comes home stiff or upset.

Once you both learn how to communicate properly, your arguments drop to basically zero.

Every now and then though, just to get a reaction out of him, you’ll place a kiss on the visor of his helmet after he’s done cleaning and polishing it; a little surprise for him to find the next morning. It’s always fun to see his conflict as he feels bad for wiping it away, but he’s also a bit rattled at the sight of his helmet not being spotless like he left it. He’d always walk up to you and tell you that “if you wanted to kiss him so badly, then you should do it properly instead”, right before pinning you to the wall and taking his sweet time with you.

All in all, Pyre is a pretty solid partner, always looking out for you. Of course, you try your best to return the favour, which mostly comes in the shape of words of reassurance and soft caresses.

One sure way to disarm him completely when you’re both in bed and he can’t sleep, is by placing kiss after kiss all over his face. The way he sighs and melts into your touch is intoxicating.

One time you were in the hangar talking to Pyre, talking something over before he leaves on a shuttle. Once you were done and he was about to turn around to go up the ramp to the ship, you said your goodbyes and a “take care, I love you” slipped out right as two stormtroopers were walking past you two with some crates. All four of you froze on the spot; it wasn’t a secret that you and the commander were a thing, but Pyre had made it clear from the start that he wouldn’t want this kind of interactions to reach prying ears or eyes. It was your first and only slip-up, so you were unsure of how he would react, and what to do. One of the troopers cleared their throat and carried on as if nothing had happened, the other one following suit. Once they were out of earshot, you were about to apologise to him, but with his visor cast down to the floor, he wordlessly took your hand in his and gave it a squeeze before effectively turning around and boarding the ship. Unbeknownst to you, that man was sporting a violent blush underneath the helmet.

~~~~~

[link to join the taglist in my pinned post!]

#goose feathers #star wars resistance x reader #sw resistance x reader #commander pyre x reader #star wars pyre x reader #star wars x reader

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bettyshoweduptotheparty · 6 months

Text

Guys, gals and non-binary pals, I have caught up on my inbox!

Thanks for all the thoughtful messages and interesting asks, unfortunately also had to delete a few from trolls (I think a few of us got these from people who were quite aggressively pushing the idea that Karlie and the girl squad were a PR strategy…🙄)

Reminder that you will never get a response from me if you are trying to force an opinion on others or just want to belittle or hate on people with different beliefs to you. Also, in case I haven’t said it before, I won’t be discussing anything about Taylor’s relationship with her parents, her own parenting, any potential past relationships or anything considered too personal or invasive (by my own judgment). I’m here for kaylor content and anything these two do professionally, as well as other cute and interesting gay shit. And to the sweet lovely person who said they take what I write as gospel, please don’t, I post that stuff to encourage discussion and invite discourse, not be cause I think I have all the answers (I don’t!).

One message I didn’t mean to delete was from an anon who sounded genuinely confused about what some people throw at us with such venom and conviction. Sorry I deleted your message, anon, let me say this to you:

1. Sadly, a lot of people hate kaylors (swifties and gaylors alike) and will express this quite vigorously so if you’re new here, I’m sorry to say this will happen periodically.

2. When it does, remember you don’t need to dignify hate with a response. If anybody calls you stupid or crazy, just walk away. I’ve said it before and I will say it again, I AM NOT HERE TO CONVINCE ANYBODY. Believe whatever you like but this is a kaylor safe space.

3. You were asking about the ‘Karlie and the squad were PR’ anons. Honestly, I have no problem with people believing that if that’s what they’re convinced by. I will just have to disagree. In case you were wondering how to react to people presenting ‘facts’ so aggressively, let’s look at them. (Note, none of my trolls presented any actual facts or evidence, just opinions).

4. If anybody presents me any new actual information, I will look at it. That’s how critical discourse works. I have to say that not a lot I see has changed my opinion though. Yes, Tree started working with Taylor in 2014 which was the time of the girl squad. Yes that was a change in public image, possibly to get rid of the ‘serial dater’ image her previous PR team had created. But that’s where the facts end. If the VS fashion show to immediate best friends pipeline looks weird or fabricated, that’s because it was. That I will agree on. But it seems more likely to me that that was because this was a launchpad for the ‘gf as bestie’ story because Taylor was sick of hiding her love away totally and that was a middle ground that worked for a while. If people want to believe that a PR team would hire a gay woman to play another gay woman’s best friend to get rid of the boy-crazy image that said gay woman had because she had too many short-term beards, but also to make her casual gf jealous… sure, believe that if you want but don’t call us crazy next time. And in terms of it ‘working’, no it didn’t work, much the opposite actually. Taylor never lost so much of her ‘relatability appeal’ than when people thought all of her friends are rich white supermodels. She built an image on being the girl next door/ the one on the bleachers/ not the cheerleader/wears jeans and T-shirts and could be your bestie that a lot of other girls could relate to. She lost a lot of that in the girl squad era when people were suddenly shocked that a beautiful rich woman is mostly friends with other beautiful rich people. So, no, it did nothing for her image if that was the plan. And btw, although the squad may have disappeared, Taylor is still friends with all the same people now that she was shamed for hanging out with then. Lily, Cara, Martha, Gigi - she may not walk the streets with them anymore on a daily basis, but she’s very much still friends with a lot of models, almost like her partner works in fashion ;) Hope that answers your question.

#inbox update #sorry it’s long #had to make some points

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signedeclipse · 2 years

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hello! seeing that your requests are open, I might as well send in a little (for like complex😓) scenario really quick!♡ (before I do so, let's just pretend ear pieces in the kny timeline😅) so, the famous kamaboko trio and quiet! fem! reader go on a mission where they must disguise themselves and act as if they are wealthy people. the three boys end up wearing fashionable suits, and reader wears an elegant dress. they're staying at a well-known and expensive resort. they go there suspecting that a group of men that work at the resort, are working with a demon due to clients going missing and their belongings disappearing. (I'll get to the point now, I'm sorry😭) they're so close to finding the demon, but alas, the four are rushed into a small bar in the resort by said employees for " a drink" so, they find themselves in desperate need of a distraction, for the demon's aura is slowly but surely getting away. the four are glancing at eachother anxiously, trying to see if any of them can come up with something. to their luck, reader clears her throat, gets on the table, and starts kicking the entire set of delicate plates and dishes, distracting the employees, giving the three boys time to get to the demon, leaving reader to defend herself against the brute men. once the mission is successfully completed, what would the boys have to say about the distraction, and would they have anything else to say regarding reader's behavior or appearance?

Kamaboko Squad [& Reader]

In which Tanjiro, Inosuke and Zenitsu are bewildered by how y/n choses to create a distraction.

The three were all pretty frozen, trying to think of something to get out of there as fast as possible

Tanjiro and Zenitsu seemed super nervous, while Inosuke just looked plain frustrated that these people kept causing you all problems

You, on the other hand, had a brilliant idea and great waste of delicious food

Before that, though, you picked up a brownie and took a generous bite or two out of it while bunching up your skirt in one hand so you could step onto the chair

" Y/N, what are you- "

" This tastes sooo goooood... "

You sounded remorseful as you stepped onto the table, quickly catching the attention of most of the crowd

Even more, eyes flashed to you when your heel kicked the first tray of shatterables and snacks onto the floor

Everyone was stunned for a moment, but as you went to kick the mountain of wine glasses, the employees began rushing toward you, and the boys made their quick escape

" Oopsies! "

Followed by another round of smashing was all they heard before they bolted toward the demon

After the mission, you were pretty proud of the mess you made of both items and employees

Tanjiro was pretty bashful, thanking you for your quick thinking but suggesting next time they talk it out a little more

Inside, he thought it was super cool of you and was glad you made it out of there unscathed

Zenitsu is practically floating around you, singing praises and offering to get you snacks to make up for the ones you had to trash

But he's also worried that you'd make a bad wife if you insist on breaking all the dishes like that

Inosuke asks if next time he can be the one to do it instead

You might have to stop him from trying to do it at the butterfly mansion a few times

Authors Note - And with that my inbox is at zero! Im gonna update my masterlist while I wait for more requests to funnel in <3 Hope you enjoy anon! Also the idea of you just kicking shit off the table was super funny to to me, so thank you!

#demon slayer x reader #demon slayer #demon slayer headcanons #headcanons #kny headcanons #kny x reader #kimetsu no yaiba #x reader #reader insert #kamaboko squad #tanjiro #tanjiro x reader #zenitsu x reader #zenitsu #inosuke x reader #inosuke

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violets-arepurple · 2 years

Note

Your theory on abilities being a trauma response is actually kind of correct! In the Gaiden light novel, it was stated that people develop abilities after some major event occurs rather than being born with them. I apparently can't send images on anon, so instead I'll copy and paste the specific excerpt I'm referring to (all translation credit goes to profqlasses on Twitter, she really did us Gaiden fans a massive service with her translation).

---

"Because my ability does not listen to my commands.

My ability lives in the shadow beneath my feet. With almost no definite form and like the shadow itself that wriggles autonomously, it’s an elusive ability lifeform. What I only know is that it has goat-like horns and is a bipedal beast, with nothing more than a black sickle to attack with. Everything else is ambiguous; even if you stare at it carefully, you still won’t be able to make out its figure. I don’t even know what it’s thinking.

I call it the Shadowling.

It’s hiding in my shadow now, thinking of something.

I don’t know when it will reveal itself or whom it will attack.

I don’t even know if it’s an enemy or an ally.

Sometimes when I’m walking down the street, I feel its gaze in my shadows, and my skin would grow cold.

A monster lurking within me.

An abnormality holding my breath behind my daily life.

“Sensei,” I muttered hoarsely. “Have you ever wished you didn’t have your ability?”

“What a very mature question,” replied Ayatsuji-sensei. “I can tell you the answer, but I don’t think a fledgling like you would catch it. You’ll need about ten years of suffering for that kind of excellent question. How many years has it been since your ability first awakened?”

I didn’t need to count with my fingers; the number had always been in my head.

“……Five years.”

“There are lots of obscurities as to when and how people acquire their abilities. But most of the time, there’s a certain trigger. In your case, it was your mother’s death. In Reigo Island’s Serial Murder Case five years ago. If it’s from something like that, it’s no wonder if one or two abilities would get involved there. And it’s regardless whether the person in question wants it or not.”

The Reigo Island Serial Murder Case that happened five years ago.

A case where tourists who visited the island suspiciously disappeared one by one.

Ever since Mother died in that case, I’ve had to deal with this unstable and baffling ability.

My senpai from the Special Division analyzed this ability as “a memento of my mother”. Whatever the reason was, my ability manifested because of Mother, which led me to be scouted by the Special Division. In that sense, it’s all thanks to Mother that I became an agent. In reference to that, Senpai once mentioned, “Think of it as a gift from your mother”.

However…

I remember the moment when the dark and cold figure of the Shadowling pierced the Special Forces members’ chests.

Without even a murderous intent but rather with a transparent and pure will to kill.

This—is a gift?"

---

It's kind of a long excerpt (so sorry for how much space this'll take up in your inbox), but it's really interesting and important. I'd also like to specifically emphasize the part where Ayatsuji says that "it's no wonder if one or two abilities would get involved there". One or two. This confirms that people can develop several abilities, which is an absolutely fascinating concept.

Anyway, Gaiden is literally So important to overall BSD lore, and it pains me that it's so criminally underrated. So, if you have the time, I highly suggest reading it :)

Thank you for the info Anon

The several abilities part is quite interesting as it could be reminiscent of people having multiple trauma responses/coping mechanisms in the face of trauma

Peoples abilities being uncontrollable at first is also important as for many people who have trauma it can be difficult for them to prevent the negative effect of their trauma and in Bsd it seems to be that the people with the most control over their ability have some sort of support system or recovery. Even characters like Akutagawa who seems to have control over his ability but he in fact uses it in a very self destructive way that only really causes harm to himself and others (this isn’t to say he’s bad due to his trauma that is a contributing factor but mental illness is a reason not an excuse)

This is also has interesting for Dazai as he has one of the most uncontrolled abilities, he’s constantly in defence mode as well as this he is the most obviously traumatised characters, as shown by his constant suicide attempts, manipulation and self sabotage. This means it may be possible that with some character development and healing he’ll be able to turn his ability off one day

#sorry for the late reply anon #y’all feel free to send more asks on the theory in I enjoy thinking about it #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd theory #bsd dazai #bsd aktugawa #ask

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amiharana · 1 year

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Link is peak older brother energy I feel that is essential to his character. But the odd thing is that he's equally likely to be evil to his sister or the Perfect Role Model (he seems to be good with kids in botw too) and I think that entirely depends on how big the age gap between him and his sister is (bc link probably matured way too fast after he pulled the sword, not that he had no morals before but any mischievousness disappeared after that)

But either way can you imagine being links sister whether you're close or not like😭 And your brother is literally the divinely chosen champion of your nation. how do you live up to that i know those family dinners were tense. Links dad is out here like so proud of my son who just bested a swordsman many years his senior to become the sovereign royal princess' head chosen guard. and also my daughter for getting a C+ in her sheikah basic history exam. 🙂

What do you think revalis family situation is like. Because I have no clue but I know that guy must have Issues

anon i'm so sorry it took so long to answer this but i've been excited about this question since i saw it in my inbox. the "my daughter getting a c+ in sheikah history" bit had me rolling like here's my kid who is prophesied to save the world vs. my kid who gets into fights with cuccos. giving very much gay son or thot daughter

you're absolutely correct that link is very much Older Brother, but because pulling the master sword made him mature too fast and bear the burdens of the world as its adolescent savior, he's an Eldest Daughter by default (more under the keep-reading because i failed again in making this short)

i honestly like both ideas of link's little sister either adoring him and looking up to him like a role model, or despising him and spitting at him every time they saw each other, but it would depend a lot on whether or not link's parents splitting was amicable or not. my original headcanon kind of implied that after link's parents split, they never saw each other ever again because link and his dad were at hyrule castle and link's mother and sister stayed in hateno, but it would be cool if link's parents shared custody and had each kid go travel to see their other parent and sibling lol. i think that link would definitely write letters to his mother and sister, even if they resented him.

from here i'm just gonna refer to link's little sister as aryll until i solidify her character (i'm stuck between two names for her right now) and because it's just easier LOL but the idea of aryll being like a teeny baby 5-6 years younger than link who thinks her big brother is so cool and wants to become a knight just like him, carrying around fake wooden swords with her, wearing an oversized soldier's helm, and telling her mother like "i'll protect you, mama!" is so cute. vs. aryll being a year or two younger and resenting link for being better at everything than her and how no one seems to acknowledge her accomplishments when link's cast a tall shadow over hers. aryll, who does everything to prove that she's just as good of a fighter as her brother is, but her father still brushes her aside for link.

i think the reaction that either version of aryll would have if link slowly went quiet and stopped sending letters or coming to see her after pulling the master sword would be devastating. for teeny baby adoring aryll, she would wonder why link hasn't sent any letters recently and rationalizes it as being busy with being the champion now. as time goes by, link doesn't send any more letters at all and he doesn't ever visit despite there being sightings of the hylian champion everywhere but the necluda region and aryll would slowly become heartbroken and distraught that her big brother isn't talking to her anymore, that he seems to have forgotten about her.

but for resentful aryll, it further proves that link never cared about her and her mother at all and that all he cares about is prestige and status and fulfilling his stupid destiny as the wielder of the sword that seals the darkness (she rereads link's old letters in the middle of the night with nothing but a tiny flame, and cries silently wondering if things would be different if their parents never split or if link was never chosen as a champion).

sorry i made it sad LMAO but yes it would be funny if they still had family dinners with their father being like "today, link bested five men in hand-to-hand combat all at once, fought off ten monster hordes alone, and deflected a guardian beam with a pot lid saving someone's life! how did your day fare, aryll?" and aryll is just like. i fell off my horse shooting 20 bullseyes during practice. their father is just like Hm. That's nice. Your brother can do 50 while standing on Epona's back. cue aryll staring murderously at link, meanwhile link does not give a single shit about this conversation, he's busy shoving his face full of the food that aryll cooked because aryll is a good cook :)

it's would be such a funny perspective, aryll plotting to murder link in his sleep vs. link who is oblivious to aryll's resentment and still thinks that's his little sister who fights well and cooks a great meal. now i'm thinking about link and aryll who used to cook dinners together and learned how to cook from their mother... :(

now revali, my poor dear sweet revali... i've seen a couple fics here and there that mention revali's family situation, but i personally am in favor of the idea that revali was either abandoned or orphaned as a fledgling, and was raised by the elder and the whole of rito village in general. since nintendo gives us no indication of revali's family but implies that revali is around the same age as link, zelda, and mipha as per urbosa's diary, there's a lot of potential and flexibility with this idea.

if revali was abandoned, i think the rito would shun his parents because i like the idea that family and bonds are very important in their culture, and what kind of parents would abandon their baby like that? who even knows why revali's parents would do that but i think there are still no indications of revali's family in age of calamity, so perhaps they fled the village when revali was born and abandoned his egg in the nest. fuck them fr! this could be a good explanation for his motivation as to why he pushes himself so hard to be better as per the DLC champion revali's song memory. his parents didn't want him enough to keep him and even fled the entire village so that they wouldn't be held responsible to care for him anymore, and that stings. it would be a deep-seated insecurity for revali, a sense of betrayal, loss, and desperation to be loved, to be wanted by someone. so he trains to be better, he pushes himself until he collapses, because if his parents didn't want him as he was, then maybe no one else will.

now if revali was orphaned, i would assume that both his parents were revered, formidable warriors who died in battle but most importantly, that they did love and want revali. revali might have already been hatched at this time and present at his parents' funerals, which is actually the saddest thing ever. a tiny orphaned little hatchling who being the one to send his parents off, to honor them for dying a warrior's death. it might be a good origin story and another really good motivation behind revali's character, why he pushes himself so hard to be better. do you think baby revali thought it was his fault that his parents died in battle, that he wasn't strong enough to protect them and that's why he needs to be the strongest warrior there ever was among the rito to make sure he can protect the people he cares and loves for the most? now imagine this version of revali cradling a dying link in his arms lmao

both are good backgrounds for revali but i think at the moment i'm leaning towards the orphaned storyline. it's only thing to be unloved and unwanted, but to know you were loved and wanted but to lose those people so soon is incredibly tragic. to know those people for a short window of time and lose them so soon must tear revali apart everyday. do you think he sits alone in the flight range in the quiet of the night after hours of training, trying desperately to remember his father and mother's faces, how they must have felt to see their son hatch, how they thought they would return home safely to him that day? he's loved and respected by the village and the elder treats him as their own, but it's not the same as knowing you had a mother and father who wanted you as their own too. he's honestly also the village's biggest tragedy. i'm imagining him as a fledgling, fresh out of the funeral, walking past some rito mothers cooking meals for their kids or some shit, openly talking about how tragic it was to lose some of their best warriors and to leave behind a son in their wake. it's too much for baby revali and he runs down the platforms of rito village and hides in a tree in one of the island spires connecting the village to the mainland, crying his eyes out.

my poor blorbo revali, please treat him and link kindly everyone. they're always going through some shit whether it's family trauma or their weird gay courting 😔

#loz #botw #loz botw #legend of zelda #amihan's botwverse #amihan's headcanons #ask #this post is so long i'm sorry it took so long again anon #should i do a post going in depth about my headcanons on link and revali's families respectively?#like fleshing them out as characters?#i might. don't hold me to it but i might.#i really liked this ask a lot genuinely #i started doodling what i think “aryll” would look like #i haven't decided yet but i might try to do an actual drawing idk #the two names i'm stuck between for her are “talei” and “miran”#i searched up 'baby names that mean precious' and those were the two i liked #technically miran is also marvelous in latin? but the 'boy' name meant precious in russian or something #idc i like both names #anyways revali is lowkey an inverse parallel to naruto idk #like naruto also lost his parents in a tragic way #and was meant to be revered and treated with respect because he was a symbol of the sacrifice his parents made to save the village #but the village treated him like a monster for having the demon inside of him and ostracized him #revali is the inverse of that #revali and link but they're literally sasuke and naruto #god i eat that sun-moon symbolism shit up omgg #anyways sorry if there are any mistakes or grammatical errors lmk so i can fix them

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slasherlaurie · 2 months

Text

Hi everyone, your friend Laurie is back!! I don’t really know how to start this so I’m getting right into it but summary for babes who cbf (honestly same lol). If you’re the anon who kept popping into my inbox with kindness in the months I was gone PLEASE read the edit at the end.

TLDR: I’m back and I’m writing again! Things will be different but I’m figuring it out as I go. Hope you stick around <3

First of all, I’d like to apologize for my months of disappearances with no explanation. I know that was probably very frustrating for people who had requests or were waiting for more posts. Since the start of this year I’ve been horribly overwhelmed with irl stuff which I won’t get into for the sake of keeping heavy subjects out of this update, but I’ve finally been able to get some free time to get back to the things I love. Which moves me onto the next talking point.

I really have missed this blog and writing, but I think I need to go about it a different way. I put too much pressure on myself to fulfill requests without flaw and in a timely manner that I pushed myself into burnout, and so I’ve been thinking about how to do this the past couple of days. First of all, I’m deleting all requests in my inbox while I figure out what I wanna do. My inbox will still be open for a little while, but please don’t expect me to get around to it. I likely won’t do all of them, but I will make a post about it if I do stick with a request. I’m sorry to anyone who had a request or something in my drafts, I understand if this is upsetting.

I think from now on I’m mostly going to post when I’m inspired, maybe every once a month or so on average. The time pressure of someone waiting for me to churn something out really turned me away from writing so at least for a while I’m going to be completely unscheduled with my posting. Again, I’m very sorry to anyone who had a request in.

As well as this, I’d taken a BIG break from dead by daylight. Not only because of the irl stuff I mentioned making me too busy, but also because I kinda lost my love for the game and the characters. Thankfully, my feelings about it have been rekindled, and I’m really excited to return to the community.

Lastly, to my friends I’ve made through this blog. I’m so so sorry for disappearing and cutting people off, I know it doesn’t excuse it but I’ve been so socially overwhelmed the past couple of months that I’ve neglected to keep up with my online friends. I hope you can understand I wouldn’t have ghosted anyone without warning if I could’ve, but the circumstances made a lot of things extremely stressful at the time.

Sorry for this post being a bit serious, I’m not really sure how to cover everything without sounding like a bunch of excuses otherwise. Also I wrote this in my notes app at like 2am and copy pasted it here so I apologize for the messy format 😭 ily all and I’ve missed you!

edit: To the anon who kept leaving supportive messages in my inbox despite my absence, I appreciate you beyond words you are a REAL one <333 Whoever you are ilysm and I’m so sorry I didn’t see them earlier!!

#dbd x reader #dbd killers x reader #dbd x you #laurie updates #dbd #reader insert #dbd survivors x reader

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moonjxsung · 2 months

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hi star i kinda disappeared for a while, i'm sorry about that. but i wanted to quickly drop by just to tell you how extremely loved you are on this blog. you are loved by me, fellow anons, silent followers, and so much more. i am so genuinely happy that i'm blessed enough to call you my friend (and my gf and wife at the same time shhhh). even if we don't talk every single day, i have no doubt that your love and my love is genuine, and i think SO many other people can relate. your name really fits you because you truly do shine like a star. you're OUR star, and that's the best part about it all. you're our star and we get to love you and know you. that's so amazing, isn't it? i always get so excited when you text me (except that one time you scared me oops) and i literally have thought to myself "okay don't answer immediately you'll look cooler" HELPME. we are always cheering for you from afar, and you will always have a safe place with us just like we do with you. you're more than an author on tumblr. you're our friend. someone we trust, someone we know, someone we love. i like to believe we crossed paths for a purpose, and even if it won't last forever, you still have left a star shaped hand print on my heart, and i will always be blessed to know you. on another note, there's a lunar eclipse soon (and luckily i don't have to travel for it) and i will be doing spellwork. i will be thinking of you and sending you all the protection and self loving energy i can. i love you, star. genuinely, thank you for all you've done for me and others. you really are a bright star, and you're our bright star. blessed to know you, more blessed to love you. 🦢🩷⭐️

- 🦢

I saw this message at the early hours of the morning and then when I went to sleep I thought I dreamt it and imagine the smile on my face when I navigate to my inbox and it was real ! it was not in fact a silly little gay dream. I’m so lucky

my swan!!!! my angel and the light of my life and the most beautiful, talented, smart, poetic girl I know. what an honor it is to have crossed paths with you in the fleeting spaces of internet blogs and kpop communities alike. I still remember our first few message exchanges like the back of my hand, your aversion to my terrible “flirt with every single one of my anons” habit and the way I’d flirt with you ten times harder in return just for the hell of it. never had I considered you’d become so near and dear to me, and the way you’ve so quickly occupied the little spaces of my mind where poetry and art and all things beautiful live has felt like the most natural occurrence of all. like you’ve always belonged there!

I love waking up to all your anon messages, to your discord chats of jilix edits and voice memos and virtually seeking shelter with you during passing tornados. you’re just as much a safe space to me and I am eternally grateful the stars crossed the way they did for us to find each other.

please know that I am forever changed by the person you are, by all of our interactions and the kindness you continue to bestow upon me no matter how many times we’ve talked. hearing that you keep me in all of your best wishes and spellwork is always a reminder that there are lovely people in this world like yourself, and I’m beyond lucky to know one, no matter the distance between us. lucky to know you, lucky to love you and luckiest to be graced with your sweet messages. In case you haven’t gathered it from my novel-length letter already, I love you !

also pls feel free to respond at the speed of light whenever you want I genuinely don’t think there’s a single thing that could make me view you as uncool. ur just the coolest girl around

#🦢 anon #ask #<3

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doks-aux · 1 year

Photo

Got the Izzy hate anon today.

Pretty anti-climactic if I’m being honest, but anyway

I’ve already blocked them (or tried to, more on that at the end), but I screenshot it both for @izzy-anti-archive and because I wanted to figure out why I specifically received this ask now and hope it might be of help to anyone else who might be targeted in the future.

It seems odd timing that now of all times I get hit by (one of) the izzy hate anon(s). Compared to the rest of my career in Izzy Enjoyment, I haven’t really been posting as much about him lately. Or posting a lot at all. I have been reblogging on my main account, but that one is unsearchable and the ask wasn’t directed there. The message is referencing this post of mine specifically. It was made over a month ago on Nov. 16. It did have a little uptick in activity recently but slowed down the last couple of days.

Shortly before receiving the anon (somewhere in the area of one to three hours; i have TERRIBLE time blindness, I’m sorry), I liked the posts of another user who’d documented their extended encounter with the same anon (or group of them) just today. (I won’t name them here unless they volunteer the information on their own, but I think many of us saw it.) However, if the anon was trolling for new ask targets in the notes of previous targets’ posts, it would be my main they found, and the ask wasn’t directed there. The most recent post on my main is a reblog from this account (about my original stories), but that seems like an unnecessary extra step. If someone was checking this account on mobile, the referenced post displays as one of my top posts, so that could explain how it was found. But if someone is jumping to this blog from the Izzy tags, it seems odd they’d target that post to snark about and not my actual recent posting in the Izzy tags, which are shippy posts with trans headcanons. That seems like a much more ample target. But that ship is with a character who doesn’t even exist, so maybe there aren’t readymade insults about it. This round of anon hate does just seem to recycle the same general bullet points.

How does this line up with anyone else’s recent hate anon experience? Are you getting hit with asks after interacting with the posts of previous targets? Are the asks referencing posts or discussions from weeks or more ago? I don’t know if there’s a pattern to be found or what we could do if we found one, but it’s the only idea I have at the moment. This specific ask didn’t really bother me much, but I’ve seen them get worse, and I really wish we had a way to protect each other from this shit.

(When I say I tried to block the anon, I mean I did all the steps to block them on desktop but got an error message that said it failed. But the ask them disappeared from my inbox. So I really have no idea what happened there.)

#izzy hate anon #anti izzy anon #Izzy Hands #Israel Hands #the izcourse #anon hate #doc's fandom adventures #Our Flag Means Death #sorry about the fandom tag but it's for organizational purposes

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caelumsnuff · 1 year

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I’m really sorry you have to deal with such awful anons. This fandom has no moral high ground to stand on ever what with them actually causing in real life harm to Erik by collectively causing him to out himself as an SA victim (something that he literally said almost made him quit; they care soooo much about his feelings but not a single apology from anyone has ever happened over that), posting his real first and last name on TikTok, sharing personal stories he shares with patreon on other websites, and actually sharing age-restricted content he had behind a wall with in real life minors. Like you want to talk about “causing harm to real people?”

Maybe there should be some addressing of those actual things that have happened than doing some virtue signaling to feel superior over a fictional 24 year old character (that 1) people imagine what he looks like (that anon bringing up a character that looks like a kid but is a 1000 like we decide what this 24 year old character looks like; plenty of people do not imagine this 24 year old to look like a child) 2) is not that much younger than the highly sexualized Gavin for a demon 3) is same kind of demon as another highly sexualized and predatory character (Regulus) 4) we were told comes from a type of being that coalesce as “fully formed adults” 5) is voiced by an adult 6) has characteristics like stuttering and rambling like another highly sexualized character (Lasko; probably the most sexualized)).

A fandom that has caused in real life harm to its creator that made him come to us about real trauma and made him want to quit forever and harm to ACTUAL minors in real life with their incessant need to post about bonus audios on here without a read more and post the actual audio content on TikTok. A bunch of people just wanting to pat themselves on the back because they get to look like they care about something just. Like ‘look at me harassing someone as if this is real life activism or actual helping victims of anything’

Thank you anon. It's okay, it's not doing much too me lol i'm blocking most of them and i am making fun of like all of them. Granted no one should have to deal with this bullshit, but i'm glad they at least picked me this time instead of some random fandom goer that might be more affected by the berating than i am.

They really do act like this is activism or something asdfasdasd. It's nothing more than a bunch of actions meant to virtue signal to other people like "look at me! look how good of a person i am! I'm harassing people over fanfiction! lookie!!! pick me! pick me!!!" like they really some of the most translucent motherfuckers out there and im not joking.

Yeah the Caelum thing is just so so so stupid. I don't really get what the point of all the hate mail in my inbox is like.... i'm not changing my opinion on this, i was settled in it since i started listening. If they think that anything they say or do is going to somehow make me delete my fics and disappear they're dead wrong lol.

Anyways, thank you for the support ❤️ Just a reminder to you and anyone else, ill be keeping anon on for all of my sweeties.

My inbox may be covered in their decaying brain matter, but i stay silly :3

#ask #anon

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lonelier-version-of-you · 2 years

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So do you think Henrik’s stereotypically femine body language is subconscious compensation to make himself disappear almost, to be less of a target? Sort of opposite to how Jac makes herself take up more space to protect herself — actually this interests me bc IMO they were both probably targeted due to be vulnerable and overlooked as kids, right since Henrik was in school in another country and Jac was in the system, so it’s interesting that he sort of avoids attention where Jac goes for it

This is so poorly worded omg sorry. But it’s like because he was ‘seen’ by his abuser and targeted as a ‘special’ kid maybe he subconsciously shys away from being ‘seen’ again (went from surgery to management, tried to build a traditional hetero life). Whereas Jac tries to avoid being able to be targeted due to lack of power so that and insecurity means she craves recognition and authority/limelight.

Although as I type I realise Henrik in his OG stint sort of goes all against this because he is muuuuchmore like Jac (which is A Lot in this context on its own) and I’m not sure how aware Jac ever got to be about her patterns and past because she rivalled Henrik for denial due to victim blaming

Sorry now I’m just thinking out loud but now I’m just thinking about how Henrik and John both came across as at least somewhat sex repulsed whereas Jac was almost hyper sexual at times but they all shared this thread of seeing sex and relationships as almost an out of body experience and either just something you did to check off a box or to get something, like setting you did to or for someone else and not something they should be enjoying??

And then you see how their defences fall apart with someone they actually are about ie Johnrik, Russ, Joseph. And John and Jac were both less threatened by flirtations with women (denial of sexuality? Women not being their sexual abusers in the past?) where Henrik had struggles with men and women IMO.

Anon, you have no need to apologise, I not only welcome but encourage people thinking out loud about Henrik and Jac and John in my inbox!

To answer your question: yeah, I think that's totally part of it. I think it can easily coexist with early Henrik as well - he actually does the "trying to take up less space" thing quite a bit throughout his first stint, even in scenes where he's trying to be powerful and intimidating. It's really interesting, actually, how for a character with very obvious anger issues and a desire to be seen as intimidating and in control, especially in his early seasons, Henrik has still always been so defined by fear.

I also definitely agree about Henrik and Jac both being targeted due to being vulnerable, overlooked kids. I think in Henrik's case it ties into his autism as well - one doesn't have to accept the Reyhan nonsense as canon to know that Henrik was definitely a lonely, bullied kid (albeit probably due to several factors, not just his autism, but that certainly wouldn't have helped matters). (*coughs, points at my own fic line again about Henrik being "the awkward, foreign, Jewish boy" at school*) It's just like... obvious. So Henrik was probably very isolated at school, and desperate for attention and company, and then - and this is the point I haven't really seen brought up a lot but it breaks my heart - Henrik was targeted because he didn't have anyone else he could have talked to about what was happening to him, providing no opportunities for him to recognise it was abuse. :((

Regarding Henrik trying to avoid being 'seen', that actually reminds me of a conversation he has with the hospital inspector guy (who turns out to be a former nurse and is just generally blatantly being paralleled with Henrik) in S14E01 "Keep On Keeping On", who says this:

"I got into management out of frustration. I felt powerless. [Henrik: And now?] I think I feel even more powerless."

The inspector guy is just talking about feeling powerless regarding the NHS, but again, this scene is paralleling him with Henrik, so... take the "I got into management because I felt powerless" idea as you will.

I think Henrik trying to build a traditional hetero life was a fairly brief phase of his but it definitely happened nonetheless. (My personal headcanon is that he thought he was gay until he met Maja, then once it finally clicked with him that he had feelings for her he decided he was 100% straight and had been wrong before and he went into hardcore denial about any feelings to the contrary. He realised he was bi in those terms at some point while he was at Rigden.) I think after Maja, though, (after their first breakup that is) he decided to just flat out pretend he had no sexual or romantic feelings at all, and retreated fully into "nothing but the work" mode. (Because of this, I laugh when people do the whole "Henrik never seemed to be interested in anyone!" thing. I just think "lol, he fooled you, he wants you to think he's 'above' sex and he managed it!".)

"Henrik [...] came across as at least somewhat sex repulsed whereas Jac was almost hyper sexual at times" Oh, absolutely, and I'm really glad you said this because I've thought it very often myself but I've never got around to talking about it!! It's one of the most notable differences between them.

With John, though, I'd actually put him closer to Jac on that scale. I think John definitely tried to portray an image of himself as "above" sex, just like Henrik did, but I think it was a lot closer to reality for Henrik than it was for John. I feel like John has probably had a lot of flings and one-night stands over the years, but because the vast majority of it would have been with men (and possibly occasionally with women if he were in a situation where he thinks he can get something out of it - a la Jac sleeping with Joseph's dad), and because he feels ashamed of that, he glosses over it and pretends it doesn't happen. (John's gay, in my head - though occasionally I'll indulge in bi John for a Polyam Cryptid Squad ship - and I think if he were into women, he'd embrace an image as a "ladies' man". But he's not, so he goes for "I Have No Sexual Or Romantic Feelings Whatsoever, I Swear" instead.) Admittedly there's not a lot of actually canonical evidence for this, I've just read a lot of really good fic that has John as hypersexual due to his trauma and now it's a headcanon I can't let go of.

"but they all shared this thread of seeing sex and relationships as almost an out of body experience and either just something you did to check off a box or to get something, like setting you did to or for someone else and not something they should be enjoying??" Oh YES they really did. Again, I've thought about this mostly with Henrik (and have written it into fic before) but I think probably all of them have a "lie back and think of England" mentality to some extent. (This also brings me back to the Sahira storyline, and Henrik's treatment of her, and how he acted like he was entitled to her and she'd just have to give in and be with him eventually, and how blatantly that was a response to his own trauma.) (I've also thought stuff about this with John but I don't think it shows in my fic as much.)

(I don't know where to bring Keira Balfour - the lady from S13E04 "Queen's Gambit" who all but states she's slept with Henrik before - into this but I felt obligated to mention her because her existence is weird considering this. Henrik was very quickly developed into a character way too repressed to have a friend with benefits or ONS, and so obviously the meta reasoning for this is that the writers hadn't properly fleshed him out yet when they wrote that ep, but it's... odd with his later characterisation, in-universe. Supposedly they slept together at a conference - maybe it was overcompensation on Henrik's part? Maybe he ran into John at that conference, got shaken by the tension still between them, and ended up feeling the need to prove his quote-unquote "heterosexuality" to himself by sleeping with Keira? Idk.)

"And John and Jac were both less threatened by flirtations with women (denial of sexuality? Women not being their sexual abusers in the past?) where Henrik had struggles with men and women IMO." You're absolutely right on this too, imo. Henrik definitely has issues when it comes to flirtations both with men and with women. (Like, it's enough so that I've seen people say Henruss would've played out the exact same if Russ were a woman, which I strongly disagree with - it's taking that a bit too far if you ask me - but Henrik is definitely terrified of romantic interactions either way.) (I'd say the best example would be to compare Essie asking him about his feelings for Rox in S20E31 to Serena asking him about his feelings for Russ in S23E43. He responds far more harshly to being asked about Russ than about Rox, but in both scenes, it still clearly makes him uncomfortable.)

For Jac, I think it's that all her sexual abuse was by men, so she's a lot more comfortable flirting with women. For John that's also a possible explanation, but I also go back to the idea of him being gay and it being tied up in that - he doesn't really see being with a woman as a "real" option (since, again, rather than dating women as beards he's just pretending not to be interested in people at all) so it doesn't scare him in that way. (John and Henrik also obviously both have misogyny issues, and I think they manifest in this context in different ways.)

It's interesting that Henrik is different. His only undeniably-canon, not-tied-up-in-retcons sexual assault was by a woman (Birdie Thompson; I think about how fucked up it is that they played that for laughs a lot, but I digress), but he's had issues with women way before that (S13E44 being the obvious example, he's extremely uncomfortable with the chairman's ex-wife coming on to him) so... yeah. (S14E27 could also possibly serve as an example, given he panics, scolds Sahira, and shoves her out of his office - physically shoves her! - when she asks if he's in love with her. But personally I've always thought his issue there was more about the power dynamic and the age gap. If Sahira had been an equal, his age, he might have responded somewhat better.)

#asks #anons #my meta #tw;sexual abuse #tw;sexual assault #tw;csa #tw;abuse

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