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#i think this is maybe because well. what are you writing poetry about. you don't seem very interested in anything beyond your own emotions
hexjulia · 1 month
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ugh reading a book of poetry based on really liking a single poem and then the rest is just sort of mid navelgazing with extra space is really depressing for some reason
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t0rturedangel · 3 months
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╭ . . . 𝚆𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚕 ੭
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𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄, 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐍𝐄 ; ♰ ৎ﹕𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴
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Okay, before I start- i know that hazbin hotel has a lot of good ass songs, and I want to make own little custom songs but I cant write songs for shit however I can write poetry (not well but I'm trying) so instead of writing songs for you, I'll write shitty poetry that does not rhyme. Also sorry if my depictions of love aren't good- i have literally never been in love before, and if the ending is rushed, I'm not used to writing so much in one setting
➷ PREVIOUS SCENE | NEXT SCENE
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There once was an Cherubim angel,
so gentle and kind,
perched upon a cloud
You sat on a cloud, smiling to yourself as you watched over all the different angels talk to each other about their duties- heaven was perfect, no- no not just perfect, heaven was a utopia. No angel can do any wrong, it is only virtue that existed upon these clouds and you were among these creatures of purity, you were one of god's creations just as all the other's were.
The clouds around you were soft, almost as if they were made of the soft silk your robes were made of, they were formed to bring comfort to any angel that came in contact with them and while all angels were already joyful, the clouds merely helped them stary from sinful thoughts.
She waited for another angel,
a Seraphim named Lucifer,
a friend, so close to her
You wondered though, were was lucifer? He was always about yet you didn't have any idea on where or how to find him. In all honesty, you found Lucifer to be amazing- his ideas, imagination, creativity bought stars to your eyes (figuratively, you had no iris or pupil- your eyes, more specifically your sclera, were a soft yellow colour with white swirls decorating them), to you his words were so brilliant, other angels couldn't even begin to speak or think the way he does.
He always came up with new ideas, new creations him, you and the other angels can create- can look after and love. You couldn't help but indulge in his chats with you- adding onto his ideas in anyway you can and while you personally thought your ideas weren't as amazing as his, to Lucifer your ideas were flawless- he always said that.
Lucifer was brilliant, he truly was- you could never understand why the other angels despised his thoughts so much.
Perhaps, the cherubim was in love,
perhaps she enjoyed Lucifer's company
much more beyond just meer friendship.
Okay, you needed to slow down- you were always thinking how great he was, maybe you didn't just like him as a friend... just maybe you liked him a bit more. Though, that way of thinking should stop soon- after all you have angelic duties to do! there is no way you can just abandon them just because you adored Lucifer....'s ideas.
You took a breath and got on your feet, spreading your wings (you had four wings, two on each side) so you could take off and start your work, however when you were jus about to begin to fly a figure rushed to you- wrapping their arms around your torso.
The seraphim appeared,
all smiles and glee
he held his friend closely
with tender, with care
Lucifer came out of no where, though his presence was welcomed warmly by you : who held him back just as tight. " Luci! " you grinned letting go of him, he had gotten there just in time- it was almost like he knew you were about to fly off, " [name]! Ha ha! how are you? " he asked holding both of your hands- a dorky smile engraved onto his face " Where have you been? I was worried " that was half-true, there was no evil (what even was evil? you didn't know, it doesn't exist not yet ) but there was a high chance that Sera was telling him off again.
" How sweet, but don't worry I'm alright cherub " he brought your hands closer to him- something that grin he held could only grow as the seconds passed by, seeming like he wanted to say something " Luci- I know that look in your eye, you've being creating again! Tell me everything ", your own smile began to grow as you squeezed his hand.
" You know me too well! Okay, so i was thinking of trying to make [ creature ], sounds cool right? well guess what else! " and with that he began to ramble about his ideas once more, with you chirping in some of your own ideas which made Lucifer sound even happier.
The two angels were at peace,
within the company of each other-
did they love each other?
would they dare say it?
You flew around with Lucifer, laughing together while yelling out some nonsense that seemed to only make sense to you and him- just you and him. Though your fun was quick to end when the two of you reached the tallest cloud in all of heaven and the two of you- both out of breath- fell onto it. " That was fun! " you chuckled, still trying to catch your breath " yeah! I loved that " was the reply, then silence fell upon the two of you. Though it wasnt awkward silence, it never was when it came to [name] and Lucifer- it was comforting and peaceful.
Though this silence was broken quickly by you. Over the last few weeks, months you were coming to understand your feelings towards the seraphim, and while you could easily deny them- to avoid them and focus of everything but that but you just couldn't, you sucked with feelings especially hiding them! and plus, how could you live if you didn't tell Luci how you felt " Luci... I " love you, those words were suddenly lodged in your throat and you couldn't let them be said- be heard why did that happen, you were sure you could say them- hell you said them before to people who you see as family!, "sorry what i meant was I- " loved you for so long now, I love you and I don't think I can ever stop loving you " loved that too- it was so fun! "
She couldn't say it,
she was too scared to tell her dear Lucifer
of her true feelings... though did he feel the same?
What was wrong with you? You couldnt say it, why? You loved Lucifer- there you admitted it in your mind but you just cant say it to him. You sighed and stared at your mirror- looking over your face, your long hair (angels all had long hair, it was one of the things that they always cared for and almost showed off)
Of course he did,
how could he not?
he loved her more than anything
she listen to his ideas, she added onto them
she never hated them, never judged.
but then, the high order formed the earth-
Adam and Lilith.
" [name? " Lucifer walked over to you, a smile on his face- though he always smiled, this smile seemed different in a way but you couldn't place your finger on it however that did not stop you from returning his smile " Luci! hey! " you grinned as he stopped just in front of you " [name]? do you know the two humans? " " Adam and Lilith? " " yes! Me and Lilith... are in love!"
...
he.. he loved the human Lilith? The one who ran from Adam (you heard of this from Sera, and while you acted disappointed you agreed with Lilith's decision of leaving Adam, you would have too), he found her and fell for her? .. how? she hasn't even existed for that long! How could you possibly fall that quick? it was impossible right?
It took you a few seconds to compose yourself so you can smile for Lucifer, though it didnt feel right " That's... brilliant Luci! I'm so happy you found love- how does it feel like? " and with that question you bared the suffering of listening to Lucifer, the one you loved, gush about Lilith, and you were almost envious of Lilith- almost hated her, you never met her and now dear god you probably don't ever want to. You had lost your Lucifer to her, though... you suppose he was never yours.
and with that,
those confessions of requited love
would forever be sealed away,
locked behind their grinning lips
though the perish of love was not their only problem.
Lucifer went too far,
he created evil through the second bride,
she bit the apple, she took the fall
and Lucifer and his love was to blame
though you would not let him be punished alone.
You too were part of this.
" No! " You screamed as you ran to the shaking Lucifer's side, almost trying to shield him from the anger of the higher order of angels. " Leave him be! He has done nothing wrong! " you defended him, still caring over your friend. Nevertheless, the angels did not listen to your words in the way you intended- they saw this as a further act of aggression from you as you also had a part to play in coursing dear Eve into biting the apple from the tree of knowledge of good or evil, you lead her to the tree, plucked the apple with Lucifer in tow and let her bite it. Now you and Lucifer were being punished, Lucifer getting the harsher side of it.
The angel was thrown to the depths,
to a world name named Hell,
where the only side of humans Lucifer was granted to see,
was the side he created.
You were also punished to fall,
tho to hell was too much they said
so you fell the half way
now for ever trapped in a dead land-
forever banished to be alone.
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𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 ⠆ ⸺ @reverse-soe @jellibean2018 @aliazy @sugarrush-blush @littledolly2345 @immahuman @marsilis
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dollidot · 2 months
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I'll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake
pairing: mizu x fem!reader
tags: loser!mizu, rebel!reader, mizu being pathetic, slight nsfw there's nothing explicit but it's implied, unrequited love (but not really), no beta we die like m!kio
a/n: nobody puts baby in the corner by fall out boy for max brainrot + also sorry it's short I can't write seriously 😭 if somebody else wants to elaborate on this fic / situation please feel free honestly this is sorta just a rambling
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she was enamoured. for the first time in her life she wanted something so bad it was all she thought about. she'd stared at you through the much-too-bright lights of the party, watched the way you drank, the way you spoke, the way you ran your oh so soft fingers through your hair every so often. she'd stared at you hopelessly as you'd smiled at her from across the room, tucked your hair behind your ear the way you did when you were simpering at a guy you wanted, the way you'd barely glanced at other people as you approached her. "y'know, I don't think I've ever seen you at a party. how come you're here?" you're practically shouting in the chaos of the room and she's stammering, practically falling on her words as she hopelessly tries to reply. "I uh, akemi dragged me here. I would rather be at home right now, if I'm being honest." the laugh that slips out of her lips is futile, not at all as chill and laid back as she'd like it to be. you sigh, lifting your sunglasses onto your head to show off your gorgeous eyes, burned into her head like one of the many mixtape cds she'd made for you (not that she'd ever given them to you, nor would she ever). "well, I'm glad you're here. you're actually cool to talk to, unlike everybody else. god, even taigen is boring me." and you're smiling, laughing even, your beautiful lips parting ever so slightly as you look up at her in a way that makes the alcohol in her system curdle in her stomach as she just smiles stupidly at you. "I'm cool? well, that might be a first." she gives that awkward chuckle she does when she's completely lost in her own mind. you return the laugh, only you actually know where you are and what's going on. "wanna get out of here? it's way too loud, I need a break." and then you're grabbing her hand, leading her to the yard and pulling her onto the grass and smiling at her in a matter of maybe.. five minutes? she doesn't register what's happening but she's smiling because god, you're so pretty. "hey, earth to mizu. you alive, or has your conscience kinda just slipped outta your head?" you're gazing at her, smirking almost knowingly as you sit facing her, leaning on one hand as you wave the other in front of her. "oh— yeah, I'm fine. got distracted, that was all." one swift movement and your lips are on hers. and your hands are tracing circles onto her skin, under her shirt. she grabs your wrist and pulls away, just looking at you with that pathetically smitten look she's been giving you all night. "are you okay? I can stop, if you—" "no. no, I just.. I'm not sure about.. out here, yknow?" she sighs, holding your hand as she smiles at you and god, she is out of it. whether it's the alcohol or you, you couldn't tell. "you have a point. wanna go back to my place?" and she's nodding, neck practically snapping as she stands, pulling you up and placing a hand on your waist as you drunkenly leave the party. and if only you'd noticed. if only you'd seen the look of pure and unbridled want in her eyes, acknowledged the fact she was practically swimming in desire. and if only you'd returned that desire. you did, she supposed, for a while. not in the same way she felt for you, but you'd returned some kind of want and that was enough for her. she knows you're not hers, she knows you don't want to be hers, but that night that she had you rings through her head, through the walls she hides inside of, it rings through her body, out of her hands into her music, her poetry, her musings in her battered leather journal. she wanted you so bad it hurt. but for now, she'd stick to being your best kept secret.
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silverameco · 15 days
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Bookshop AU - @wolfstarmicrofic - 763 words
Sirius loved Tuesdays, because he didn't work the afternoon, and could go annoy his brother. Regulus had been working at Lily's bookshop for a few years now. It was striking how well he fitted in the place. When Lily openned her shop, Sirius never thought he would ever see his brother in it. And now, he couldn't imagine it without him.
Sirius was leaning against the counter, bickering with Regulus who kept rolling his eyes, pretending to be bother by it. Sirius knew he was enjoying his presence every Tuesday. They never thought they could have this, after all.
Regulus left him alone to fetch something at the back of the store. Suddendly, the bell of the door tinkled and Sirius turned his head to face the stranger. It might be the best thing he ever did, because the man standing before him was the most beautiful sight. He had sun bleached curls, tiny freckles on the bridge of his nose, and a scar crossing his face. Most of all, he had amber eyes glinting in the sun that filtered through the glass door. Sirius felt like he himself was glowing under his gaze.
"Hi, I'm looking for-", the stranger began.
"A book ?" Sirius interrupted with a cheeky grin. "I think you might be in the right place. A bookstore, that is."
The man sent him an amused smile. "Er, actually-"
"Sirius stop being rude to my customers, and my friends." Regulus said with an annoyed tone and his usual frown, coming back from the backstore. "Hi, Remus, ignore my stupid brother." he added to the stranger's attention.
Sirius couldn't process the information that this beautiful man was friend with his brother of all people. His mind was just a litany of Remus, Remus, Remus.
"Err- hey ! I'm not being rude." he said after a beat. "In fact, Remus, maybe I could help you find this book we were talking about-"
"No, you can't, you don't work here, Sirius." cutted his annoying shit of a little brother. "Come on, Remus, I'll show you the books we were discussing the other day."
He took Remus' arm, dragging him away, between the book shelves. Remus followed, but Sirius noticed his gaze lingering on him, a glint of something in his eyes, and the ghost of a smile on his lips.
So he waited patiently - maybe not so much - for them to come back at the front of the shop. When they did, Remus was holding three books. Sirius looked at the books while he payed for them. He could feel Remus very close to him, because Sirius was still against the counter. He didn't intend to move one bit.
Two of the books he didn't know, but the third one was Les Fleurs du Mal, by Charles Baudelaire. Poetry, then. With a flash of inspiration, he snatched the book from his brother's hand, ignoring his exasperated sigh.
"This one," he said, "is a very good choice."
Remus raised an interested eyebrow at him. "You like Baudelaire ?"
"Nah, I'm more of a Rimbaud kind of guy." answered Sirius with a knowing smile. "But this one is a very special edition."
"Oh, is it ?" Remus asked with an amused smile, seemingly waiting to see where he was going with this.
Sirius took a pen laying on the counter, openned the front page and began writing. He took his time, letting Remus pay meanwhile.
"Yes." he said finally, handing the book back to Remus. "It has my number on it. Call me, if you want."
Sirius said it with what he hoped looked like a confident smile, but really he was shaking a bit.
"You don't have to. He's annoying." Regulus said.
But Remus kept looking at him and smiled. "Yeah, but I think I will." he answered finally. Sirius felt his heart roared.
"You're both hopeless." commented Regulus.
"Bye Sirius." Remus said with a wink and then he was gone already.
Sirius looked at his brother with a huge grin, to which he answered with a glare.
"Do you really have to flirt with my friends ?"
Sirius gasped in offense. "You're literally dating my best friend and his girlfriend who is also my friend !"
This particular Tuesday would become one of Sirius' favorite days ever.
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fire-lizard-ro · 3 months
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Could I request Argenti with a blind reader that asks to touch his face? Or maybe generally your thoughts on such a dynamic?
So I was finally able to get around to this one. It's so cute and I love it because of how Argenti is as a person but also because of the whole "beauty" thing. You'll see why in a minute.
This is going to be more of a headcanons format. Somewhat.
Reader gender is GN.
Disclaimer: This is all based on my thoughts as I have never personally known someone who was blind besides my grandmother before she passed so I don't really have anything to go on. Anything I say, I do not say to offend or by any way glorify being blind.
Writing under the cut (all SFW):
He's very understanding of it even upon your first meeting. While he feels a bit sorry because he understands life would be much harder for you, he's never looked down on you for it.
I doubt he's ever known anyone in a close capacity who was blind so there would be a bit of a learning curve for him.
Even wiht your struggles, he sees how you thrive and get by in life happily and he thinks it's beautiful. He thinks you're beautiful. To him, you shine and glitter as brightly as any star.
Contrary to what some might think- He is not perfect. I personally think that he would have some issues with being overprotective. Not only is he a knight, but he is your boyfriend! Your lover! He needs to be there for you as much as possible so you suffer no inconveniences or injury.
But you sit him down to explain to him that while you appreciate the gesture and his intentions... You don't like being treated like glass. It makes you feel less autonomous and it can feel condescending even if he didn't mean it that way.
He becomes much more knowledgable about your feelings and begins to understand how his actions can make you feel. And so he kneels in front of you where you're seated to apologize and kiss the back of your hand before bringing it to his face to lean into it after kissing your palm. Then he'd lean in to kiss you properly and whisper against your lips, asking you to teach him how to best help you. How to make things easier for you without being overbearing because all he wants is for your days to be full of joy and without hardship.
I can imagine how he guides you gently while out and about. OTL
Onto other things-
His deep understanding of beauty strikes again. He finds beauty in how, despite your struggles and limitations, you continue to live your life to the fullest. He admires that strength and thinks that you have good willpower. That strength of will is something any knight should have.
When came the day that you asked him to feel his face to get an understanding for what he looks like, he was delighted. He enjoyed when you gently took his face into your hands and ran them delicately over the planes and slopes of his face and told him he was beautiful. He somehow enjoyed your compliment more than anyone else's.
He always describes things around to you and even diligently studied to get better with words for that. He also did it befcause he'd like to show you other beautiful things since you couldn't see the sights he had through poetry. Sap. I hate him (affectionate).
Though he understood before that beauty was not just what you could see with your eyes, he finds deeper understanding the longer he is with you. It's in your every movement, sure of the world around you despite having not the sight to see it all. It's in your every word and in your every breath. It's in your very being.
It's especially in your understanding of what beauty was when one of your senses was not available to you, the one that most people use to judge beauty on. It's oddly in line with his ideals of beauty- I mean, come on. He was calling a plant, a regular degular plany with only green to color it, beautiful.
All in all, it's a beautiful (ha) relationship and the two of you are well suited to one another. Your chivalrous knight and his sweet lover.
Aaaaa~ Thank you so much for the request! It was super fun. :D
Feel free to send another on in if you wanna. I'm going to be working on the requests I haven't finished yet this weekend~
Apologies for any typos or hard to understand writing. I'll fix it tomorrey probably. >:D
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jaylleoo14 · 5 months
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An Indirect confession 
Unbeknownst to his knowledge of those simple words
>GN!ReaderxJade
A/N: For those who don't know, in Poetry there’s this thing where if you ask someone if the moon is beautiful it basically is an indirect way of saying “i love you.” And if the other person agrees then they are basically reciprocating and its mutual, so I guess you can get the gist of where this is going >:) muehehe (also sorry if the writing is kinda dry 😭My brain juices were not juicing 😔) This is also pretty lengthy so I apologize for the long read ^^;
[wc] 12.2k words
[disclaimer] Jade 
[characters] Jade, Ortho, Deuce, Jack, Grim, Floyd, Azul
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Normally students tend to avoid going to Octavinelle, the dorm that seems notorious for its shady under swept deals and the students residing there seeming to be all hushed and tight lipped about certain information. Some things they shouldn't know, yet they do and it makes you wonder how exactly they get such information. Yet one thing is undeniable, and it's the fact that they have a great cafe which tends to be overpriced, but usually of befitting prices for what they serve and provide. 
Mostro Lounge, a chic sea themed cafe which is managed by Azul Ashengrotto and runned with students from all other dorms who seek to make extra cash. Its meals and tableware, everything from the music to the decor and the overall vibe was perfect for one to leisurely dine in and perhaps hang out and study. The calming hues of blue and purple, a shimmering accent of silver which compliments the place helps create a nice pleasant place and provides a great aesthetic. It surely did look pretty and elegant, the food there being just as delicious and the drinks delightful as the jazzy music sets in the vibes. 
Nov - 12, XXXX
It was during the colder season where the sun usually starts to set earlier and the days would be shorter, the nights getting longer to be able to view the starry sky. Although not too late, the moon had already risen and was in full view. You sat near the glass wall where a full display of the waters were open and of view to you, nothing letting it shy away from watching eyes. Nothing roamed in the waters as you can make out, the only thing lighting up the dark void passed the glass being the lights illuminating the room you currently were dining in. Different colored corals and sea plants can be seen wavering around on the floor-the currents making it wave around slightly, its movements kind of enchanting you as you zone out for a bit watching the steady pacing. 
“If you aren’t going to eat your food then I call dibs!” Grim exclaims right at the same time he snatches up your plate of food, to which you ordered some simple and light vermicelli noodles. The bowled plate is taken away and you didn’t even seem to mind honestly. The soothing jazz music, the calm night in the lounge, and the background noises of side conversations from other students which can be heard as the workers walk by to drop off their orders or bust their tables. It was almost lulling you into a state of drowsiness, the temperature just right for you to even take a nap right here and now. 
“Tonight is very nice, don't you think Grim?” You say almost absent mindedly as you continue to stare at the empty waters. Your form is still like a doll as you keep your eyes on the glass pane window. 
“Because you’re treating me out for food? Heck ya! Nyahaha!” His response only prompts you to roll your eyes and a smirk spreads across your face as you sarcastically shake your head. 
“Yea well maybe I won't next time. After all, what are the chances of you getting all full marks on Crewel's potionology test?” Grim can only respond with a confident and upbeat response, ensuring that he is bound to continue to excel and this was just the beginning. You can only scoff but in all honesty, you can't deny that you were indeed proud of him for being able to reach a perfect score. 
And if it weren’t for Jade’s help Grim wouldn’t have done so well. 
“Are you enjoying your night here in our humble dorm, Prefect?”
Speak of the devil. Jade comes up with a hand placed over his chest, giving you his signature smile as you turn to look at him, your head no longer facing the pane glass wall. Grim is engrossing himself in the food, perhaps the reason why he isn't feeling too timid with his presence at the moment.
“Surprisingly.” Your answer was short and blunt, but it was enough for Jade to chuckle a little as he finds amusement in your rather tired honesty. 
“Well I’m pleased to know that you are enjoying yourself in our lovely sanctuary (y/n),” his usual politeness being one of his main outward characteristically point. A yawn escapes from your mouth, placing a hand over to try and show courtesy and politeness as you nod your head to his response, not being so responsive. 
“You seem to be quite exhausted, Prefect, perhaps you should start heading back. Or if you want, we can lend you a room. For a certain price of course.” You don't even need to look at him to know that he has this sly little smile plastered on his face until Grim interjects before you can respond.
“Nyah, we actually prefer to go back to Ramshackle now that we are done eating, right my henchman?” 
“Once I’m done with my drink, then we’ll head back,” and just as you said, you reached over to cup the blue wine glass that was filled halfway with a fruity and sweet concoction of juices that danced on your tongue when you took a sip. Wanting to occupy yourself with something, you play around with the metal tube as you proceed to enclose your lips around the straw to take a generous sip of the beverage. Its taste was able to freshen you somewhat as you closed your eyes and relaxed a little on the leather seat, the smell granting you a satisfied hum. Grim next to you could only whine for you to hurry up - not wanting to stay any longer in the presence of one of the eel twin, but just to play around spitefully you purposely started to drink a lot slower and Jade can only watch as he’s always done and squint his eyes a little as his smile widens. 
Jade’s attention is brought onto the glass wall that he noticed you were staring at before, looking up only to be met with the glimmering silver that soaks into the waters swaying waves. The full moon looks back down at him as he continues to stand in front of your booth, continuing to sip your drink as Grim starts to lay next to you to take a nap.
“The moon is quite beautiful tonight, don't you think Prefect?” He says it ever so calmly, saying those words as if to spark another conversation with you. Though it only prompts you to start coughing and hacking as you accidentally slurped in your drink a bit too fast and it ended up going to the wrong pipe. You’re practically hurled over, hitting your chest as you wipe your mouth and Jade can only watch with wide eyes.
“Nyahh!? What happened?!” Grim springs up from the sudden jerking motion of your coughing figure and you clench the ledge of the table sitting at the end of the cushion.
“My, did I say something out of the ordinary (y/n)?” Once you look up to find his full attention on you, you can only try to calm down and inhale a breath as his display of a friendly smile bore into you. Why are you making such a big deal? It’s not like those words had any meaning in this world, so there's no need to be making such a big deal (y/n)!
You’re quite embarrassed honestly, especially because you thought he just confessed right then and there. But of course, that can't be the case because those words don't mean anything in this world like it does in yours. Quickly reaffirming yourself in your head, you let out another cough to clear your throat and catch your breath. 
“A-Ah, no uhm, I thought I misheard you is all haha. But ahem, I would say that tonight is rather lovely haha.” And you try to regain your composure as you divert your eyes and finish up with your drink. A small hum can be heard from Jades tall figure as he places his fist over his mouth. “Well, I see you are rather more awake now. Pray do tell what you misheard, I am curious to know what got you so worked up dear Prefect.” 
Your cheeks are only decorated in more of a slightly deeper shade of red, and suddenly the straw is very interesting to look at as you twirl it around in between your gloveless fingers. “You won’t get it, it won't make sense anyways. Just some nonsense.” You can only wave your hand dismissively and he can't help but grow even more intrigued as your brows furrow and you continue to brush it off.
“How unfortunate you can’t seem to try and help me understand, even though I went through all the trouble to help you and Grim with your studies. I find that rather unfair especially since I see that you two have bore fruit in your success due to my aid.” 
His words help you gain back your composure, resteeling yourself as you straighten your back and shoot him a placate smile. “Hmm? Whatever do you mean Jade? I’m paying you back by visiting you and dining at the place you work at so you can gain income. I think that’s plenty enough to repay you.” He only squints just slightly at you in response and you’re pretty sure you can feel as if you’ve triggered something in him be it good or bad - that's something you don't really wanna find out though.
“Oya? You came to see me specifically? I don't see it as a valid reason enough considering that's how one would usually repay others when they are indebted to them.”
You slightly pout at him, and as usual Jade always seems to counter your attempt of being sly and snarky with his own silver coated tongue. “Whaaat? Are you saying my visit isn’t enough for you? How could you, even though I came all this way just to see YOU specifically.” You lean into the cushion almost dramatically and animated to further emphasize your offended playful nature. 
He seems to be fairly accustomed to your playfulness and responds accordingly. “Although you claim to come over to Octavinelle to come visit me specifically, I account this is the first we are talking since you made your appearance. I believe Floyd has interacted with you more than I have today.” 
“Okay well point is, I still came over for you. And to express my thanks I was helping the profit of the Mostro Lounge. Not only will you benefit but Azul would greatly appreciate my patronage! Plus, Floyd is happy knowing I'm here. See? Everyone’s happy!”
Finding the littlest details possible, you make it as important as ever. But Jade is not fooled by your little over exaggeration and nitpicking. Of course, one would know another's tricks well when they themselves do it. And he seems to find great entertainment from the way you carry on with this drag. He truly does feel a sort of fondness for you with the way that you are. Not that he’s ever said however. 
“Are you assuming that I am satisfied with what you’ve offered me?” When you look up at him you can see the way his eyes look more meticulous now, as if he’s observing your every move. Dissecting you piece by piece as he awaits for your response, patiently waiting for when he could strike and counter your words. You leave your mouth slightly agape for a moment thinking carefully for what your next words were to be, carefully trying to see what you could say in response - however the pressure of having to hurry and say something quick overrides you because if you don't, then it would be like you couldn’t match up to him. Not like you could ever, but it wasn’t a nice feeling when you let others know they have a winning upperhand. And he seemed to relish knowing that you were feeling this pressure from the way he was looking at you.
“I am assuming you aren’t dissatisfied with it.” Putting up an undeterred front, you do your best to try and keep a steel-like straight face as you stare at his mismatched eyes. 
With the way his eyes go back to their non-disturbing look you can only assume you satisfied him with your play of trying to be undisturbed. The tension is then suddenly broken when Grim lets out a complaint, saying how he’s tired already and that he just wants to go home now. Sprawled over your thighs as his back lays against them as if he was putty, an unprompted sigh escapes your mouth and you pick up grim in your arms, standing up as you begin to excuse yourself. 
“Goodnight then Jade, I’ll excuse myself now.” 
“And as is the same to you, pleasant dreams to you Prefect.”And with that, Jade goes ahead and picks up the empty porcelain dishes and the glass cup, remnants of eaten food and a little puddle of liquid to show it had been put to its intended use. 
‘I came all this way to see YOU specifically.’ Your words replay in his head as he walks back to the kitchen, a slight sulky pout on his face to which no one is able to witness. 
“I wish you could say that more often my dear (y/n).” Setting them down into the sink, the water runs as he turns on the faucet. The pressurized water splashes as the dishes make contact and he can only stare down at it as he begins to think of you. A little susurrus naturally slipped out under his breath as the sound of running water deafened his words of one sided longing. “Hmm, it seems that they were trying to avoid agreeing about the moon… ” 
On the walk back to your dormitory, Grim looks up at you from where you hold him in your arms. “Hey Henchman, did Jade say something funny back there?” 
Looking down at him, the pale ashen color of the moon's rays blanketing you both as it illuminates your path, you can only give him a slightly wide eyed response. “It’s nothing. Just something from my world is all. What he said about the moon, it means something in my world…” Your voice can only trail off as you think back to the incident, the familiar expression of embarrassment starting to bubble up again as your face heats up to which you can't help but bury your face in Grims fur as you recall what a stupid reaction you must’ve given. Grim is grumbling and complaining as you indulge in his fuzziness, seeming a bit shocked and confused from your sudden outburst. “Yer squeezin’ me ahhh!”
Loosening your grip on him, he lets out a dying wheeze as if he finally escaped from a crushed boulder on top of him. The sound of your shoes walking softly on the ground fills the air aside from the huff you let out as you try and sort yourself out. 
You’re overreacting here (y/n), Jade doesn’t love you. He doesn’t even know what those words mean! And even if he did it’s not like you love him either. Though that simple phrase was enough to have you thinking about him the entire walk back, perhaps going to give you some sweet dreams just as how he wished you back when you left. 
He definitely knew what he was doing-as the leech he is-was able to slither his way into your thoughts as planned and stick there. Something similar to a parasyte as one can compare. The way he just sticks in your head as you now roll in bed, constantly replaying his words. Why do you keep replaying these words? Why does your heart race when you replay the scene in your head over and over again and you remember how his voice sounded? Why were you starting to make random scenarios in your head, visualizing him and you wa- SNAP OUT OF IT (Y/N)! 
Sure no ones ever said those words to you before but you have to remember that it means nothing! So what if the moon is beautiful? That's all there is! You must be crazy if you think you may be coming down with something regarding that little slimy eel. He doesn’t know what those words mean anyways, why would he say that to you?
Point is, he doesn't know. End of discussion!
. . .
He knows. 
Oh he soooo knows, though you don’t know he knows. At least, not yet.
Moving the pawn over to create space for the castle to move, Jade makes his move while hovering over the wooden chess pieces. Closely calculating every piece carefully despite there being no other attentive player on the other side. Not wanting to catch your attention like a snake hunting for its prey, he goes ahead and advances forward quietly.
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Nov - 6, XXXX 
“Deuce! Jack! W-wait up for me, please!” You tiredly try to jog towards Deuce and Jack, though you would say it's less of jogging and more so walking at a jagged pace. Sweat drips down your form, drenching you and stains of sweat are pitted on your underarms and chest. You slow down, bending over as you place your hands on your knees to catch your breath. The sun's rays washing over the lands as you three stand beneath it, its heat adding onto more of excretion of sweat. 
“N-Never again. You two are trying to kill me!” Huffing and gasping desperately, Deuce comes over to pat your shoulder in hopes of comforting you. His hand placed softly atop of your draping shoulder as he slightly bent down to your crouched figure. “Sorry (y/n), I didn’t consider how today's club session would be like for people who aren’t accustomed to running so much at a consistent rate.” You can tell by the tone of voice that he genuinely felt guilty having you get put up with all that running, and Vargas being Vargas was not so lenient. 
“My feet are in so much pain. It feels comparable to wearing heels the entire day, I hate this so much.” A feigned sob is ushered out and as the reliable person he is, Jack comes over to try and comfort you as well. “I can lend you an arm if it helps. Really, you should have expected that much running at least when you offered to come participate in the track and field club.” To be fair, you only came because Deuce wanted you to check out the club in hopes that you’d be interested in joining. So you gave it a shot.
Never again. Jack shakes his head as if scolding a little child and the sound of him clicking his tongue can be heard, his brazen feathered white locks of hair swishing from side to side as he jerks his head. 
“I can lend you my arm as well! Please don't hesitate to ask for my help if you need it (y/n)! I’ll gladly let you rely on me.” Deuce’s sweet fluffy voice reminding you of a newborn hatched chick makes you soften up a bit, and despite being so sweaty you went ahead and latched onto Deuce as his offer seemed much more friendly and welcoming. He seemed to not mind it though, and Jack seems to not care whether or not you planned on relying on him. Though you acknowledge his outwardness to help. With a settled huff, you three began to walk down the dirt path that maps out the campus. 
“Maybe my feet hurt because I don't have the proper footwear.”
“Your preparation skills are even worse than I thought (y/n).”
“Look, what's done is already done okay? No need to keep saying stuff that would get me into a dour mood Jack.”
“You’re right, I didn’t mean to restate the obvious then if you’ve already acknowledged it.”
His words just make you hit him slightly on the arm, not in a hurtful way but a hit that was as light as when the waves would crash onto your feet in the sand. He didn’t mean to sound ill willed, but he has his ways of showing concern for those he cares about. He grimaces for a bit but simply overlooks it knowing that was just your usual play, noticing the way his ears would twitch from your usual playfulness - you guys had a comfortable dynamic and it showed.
“If you don't have any proper footwear, we can go stop by Sam’s shop and buy you some.”
Deuce suggestion diverts your attention back onto him, your arms still linked together as you lean on him for support while you stagger off, giving him a reaffirming nod. He seemed pleased to be of help to you, as if fulfilling the role of a good friend. 
 “Yea, let's go. I need to buy me some new socks anyways.”
“Socks? Not shoes?” 
“I don't think the problem is with my shoes. Although it may not be all the best to comfort me in running, it still gets the job done.”
Jack can only look down to observe your shoes as if to analyze what you said is true, trying to identify whether or not your words support your claim. His yellow sunset gaze which could be compared to how the sun's rays shined is heating you all right now as it bores down on you.
“Jack, before you say anything. Don't.”
“I wasn’t.”
“Don't look at my shoes, I’m poor okay. I feel like you’re secretly judging me.”
“Not exactly judging per say.”
“See! That doesn't make it any better.” A light chuckle originates from Jack as he playfully looks over to you, a small smile soon cracking on his caramel skinned face as his voice dies down. 
“How are you feeling Prefect?” A firm hand is now gripped on the other side of your shoulder, the feeling of your sweaty and sticky body meshing with your clothes as your scent muddles in with the fibers making up the cloth hugging your figure. Deuce has been walking alongside you now for the entirety of your guys walk as you head towards Sam's Shop, still quite a distance away. Feeling the need to check in on you, he continues to firmly lay his hand on your shoulder to better comfort you. 
“Deuce, you’re so considerate. I feel like I might just let out a heartfelt sob for how sweet you’re being right now.” You let out a feigned exasperated sigh - in response though Deuce’s reaction is one of surprise which you could feel without even looking at the way his body stiffens a little.
“E-Eh? This really is nothing though (y/n), you’re in pain after all. It would only be natural to help someone in need.”
“True, but you know this really helps a lot. I’m in so much pain, I practically don't wanna walk anymore.” 
“You’re over exaggerating a bit,” A little quip response from Jack makes you pout and shake your head to show you denied it. 
“Not true! Gosh if I had a significant other or something I'm sure they wouldn’t mind carrying me! Ah the convenience of having someone like that.”
“Do you really think they’d do something like that for you?” 
“Would you do that for your significant other?”
And without a second thought, he immediately answers. Only then does he seem to find how meaningless his question was upon answering yours. 
“I think having a significant other would be nice, but I don't think that's something I am trying to actively pursue right now.” Deuce chimes in his own thoughts and you let out a little laugh which also chimes just as beautifully.
“I think you’d need to be better at talking to girls first before you even consider trying to pursue one.” Light hearted laughter airs around you as you lean into his arm, your shoulders bumping up rhythmically. 
“W-wha-!”
“The last time you talked to a girl, or tried to court one - if you can even call it that - was the ghost that kidnapped Idia.”
Deuce sputters out, feeling a sense of embarrassment as you tease him about his interactions with the ghost bride, his face burning a bright red like the cards in which glossed a new coat of red paint on white roses. Besides you both, Jack takes into consideration your walking speed. He truly was showing consideration in his own way and it was something you didn't mind at all, in fact it made you feel appreciative for what he was doing. He would be leaving the two of you in the dust if he wanted to, only showing that he does indeed care about you. Deuce does the same of course, considering you are latching onto him for support as you stagger about. 
“I would understand why Deuce would just freeze up like that. When it comes to expressing those types of feelings it’s always better to actually be sincere about it.” Jack has always been more on the serious side, always viewing the perception of love as something that should last forever between you and your partner. A sense of loyalty and something not to take lightly of.
Love has many different meanings to it. A vast broad way to make a connotation of sorts which could be related in any way whatsoever. Something that you blatantly already knew of course. “Ok mister love counselor, I get that part alright? Besides, it’s not like you have to actually say you love them, I think it’d be harder to believe if you did say ‘i love you’ though.”
With his ears flattening with your sarcastic remark he should’ve known better than to say something that has at least more than once been thought about. 
“She didn’t require you to say ‘I love you.’ As long as you were a good enough candidate to fit her unrealistic, old fashion, and cliche ideal standards then you’d be good to go.”
“Okay but I meant it in a general sense. Not just for the incident with Eliza.” 
“What do you mean?” His question beckons to be answered as his tail waves from slight confusion, Deuce also sharing a similar if not more confused look. 
“Well if someone told you they loved you in a romantical sense, would you believe them?”
“Am I supposed to doubt them? That’d just be rude and disrespectful to their feelings.”
“Me personally, you could say it would also depend on who's confessing to me.” 
“That's true too Deuce. I could say the same. But I don't know. How could you believe someone who would confess such strong words towards you? I find it a bit surreal.”
“Has anyone ever confessed to you (y/n)?”
“Shut up Jack.”
A low snorkeling chuckle comes out unprompted as he muses himself in your dejected response and Deuce can only shake his head a little from the way the two of you have been slightly bantering with each other. Usually it would be Jack to be the one shaking his head, but you tend to bring out the mischievous and playful side of him. 
“I’m going to take this personally and hope that you also take me not taking your arm personally too.”
Jack is visibly taken aback with your proclamation as his ears perk up. “How childish!” 
“No it's not! You basically just told me that I'm not attractive!”
“Don't put words into my mouth!”
“Or! Perhaps you do have secret admirers and they are too scared to confess (y/n)”
Silence fills the air as you both have failed to think of such a possibility during the small moment of your little bantering, both your heads turning to look at Deuce who gives you guys a more serious face.
Relaxing a bit as Jack and you jaunted down, you go back to your usual casualness as the three of you continue your way to Sams. Your destination is not too far off as you three have been filling the time with conversation, making the walk feel shorter than usual. “Oh that might be true for most people. People may just be scared to confess to others.” 
“I mean you can always indirectly confess you know. A lot of people do that instead of outwardly confessing.” 
Deuce's eyes widen a bit with a type of child's curiosity and it only prompts you to further expand on what you meant. “Do you mean like a love letter?” Jack inquires and gives off from your earlier proposition. 
“Yeah, basically. Or you can say something to convey your feelings to them.” 
“Such as?” Deuce with his ample experience seems to show quite the interest despite stating some time ago that pursuing someone was not something he was actively trying to do. Though he still valued it as something to consider for future references in the case that a situation were to spring up and prompt him to initiate. 
An endearing smile scrawls on your face as you peer over to Deuce, Jack also listening intently as well. All this talking seems to have distracted you from the pain in your feet, but despite your hold on Deuce’s arm loosening you continue to keep your arms linked together anyways as the cool breeze comes to freshen you three up.“Well, there is this saying in poetry back in my world some people were fond of using some time ago. You basically ask someone if the moon is beautiful, and that's basically saying that you love them. If they agree with you then that's them reciprocating your feelings.”
“Ah, really? That’s some interesting and creative way of doing it. I feel like I wouldn’t be able to tell at all and only see it as a regular question though.” Deuce still nonetheless finds it rather intriguing. “Really? I’m sure there must be a saying similar to that here.” As you make it up to the shop, finally arriving after what felt like a short time despite the lengthy conversation, you find a familiar face. 
“Oh, is that? Ortho!” Waving over to Ortho, he reciprocates the friendly gesture and waves back. Seemingly, it appeared that Ortho just came back from some shopping from Sam's shop, quickly walking over in a spring-like gait.
“Ah! It’s (Y/n)(L/n), Deuce Spade, and Jack Howl! What a pleasant surprise to see you guys. Are you guys planning on getting something from Sam's shop?” His friendly personality was warming as usual and he was one of the people here whom you got along fairly well. 
Finally latching off of Deuces arm you decide to give it a try to stand as you also intend to approach Ortho with a welcoming and friendly smile. No longer leaning your weight on Deuce to help support yourself, you wince a little but endure the pain as you apply your usual weight onto your feet. Ortho seems to automatically notice and with the way his brows furrowed to show concern, Deuce and Jack come from behind standing close in the case that something happens.
“Ah prefect, you seem to be in pain! Your pain receptors and heart rate along with your tissue sensors seem to indicate you have a sense of soreness on your feet! Have you been over exerting yourself perhaps?” And as usual, due to Ortho’s inbuilt sensor indicator he seems to be all the more observant about your throb. 
“Aha you could say that. I joined Deuce and Jack in their club today so that's why. So here we are to buy some comfortable socks for me in the near future if this does happen again.”
Your lighthearted laugh doesn't seem to shake off Ortho’s concerned looking face however, so he offers to try and heal you up with some ointment packed on him. You’re grateful really, but you don't really feel all that comfortable taking your shoes and socks off right now in front of your friends after a hearty run.
“Oh no thank you Ortho. I really appreciate it but I’m sure I’d be better with some rest after. On another note, how about you search something up for me?” Your sudden change in topics catches Deuce’s and Jack’s attention as they both stare at your back as if knowing what you plan on asking. 
“Oh sure! If you insist so then I’ll leave you be then Prefect. What is it you wanted me to search up? I can get it in a blast!” His enthusiasm felt infectious and it quirks a small smile on your face despite the enduring pain. His body language conveying as such similar to how a human normally would if not for his obvious robotic decals and constructure. 
“Could you see if this saying means anything? ‘The moon is beautiful, isn't it?’” In a docile manner he quickly gets to it and with a few audible beeping computerized clicks he announces some articles and other works of literature where such a line would be found; similarly fitting the words or having the words exactly but not in a way to express someone's affection for another.
“Ah, I see. So your world really doesn't have that saying around.” You didn’t sound disappointed per-say, but you didn’t really expect much either. Upon noticing your lack of reaction, Ortho tilts his head curiously. 
“What were you hoping to find Prefect? I’m sure whatever it was we can find it together!”
Shaking your head lightly you only cross your arms and let out a slight sigh. “You see, back in (y/n)’s world, that saying is an indirect way to say ‘I love you,’ something you say to confess your feelings apparently.” Jack comes from behind and now to the side of you as he makes his presence more prominent. With an intrigued shine in Ortho’s eyes, he grips on his grocery bag slightly and brings a delighted fist up over to where his mouth would be. 
“Ah! On the way here were you guys perhaps talking about ways to confess to someone?”
“Er, not exactly. The topic kinda just happened as we were talking about how to indirectly confess to someone in general.” Deuce also comes in to step up from behind and by your side now as he too makes his presence more prominent. 
“Oh I see, the topic of love and confessions! How wondrous, should I search for some other ways to indirectly court or express your feelings towards someone?” 
Bringing a hand up to stop Ortho, you give him a little small smile to assure him that it wasn’t needed. “Thanks for the offer Ortho, but that was all I wanted at least. Everythings rather copacetic right now anyways haha.” 
“Anyways, we should better get going since I have some plans later.” Jack begins to announce as he proceeds to walk up and you soon follow after in a wobbly state, though still managing, as Deuce follows behind intentionally there to look out for you in case you’d need assistance. 
“Aww well alright then, it was nice talking to you guys. See you some time!” And with a fleeting goodbye wave, the three of you go ahead and approach Sam’s shop. Ortho now off with a tune playing as he goes down the dirt path road back to Ighynide. 
“Oh? How fascinating. To think such simple words convey tremendous feelings, fufu. Perhaps I should try saying it to them sometime when I have the courage.” Near the building of Sam’s shop, a ludicrous tall shadow looms behind a fairly covered tree.
Sneaking behind one of his towers, Jade picks up one of his pawns and sets it forward, diagonal to yours. Now swallowing and taking out one of your pawns he’s able to decrease your chess pieces. Moving your king further back out of sheer blindness and fear, all to which you know you should protect, Jade proceeds to think of his next move; now eyeing the knights in the back row which was still perfectly not in use aligned with his king and queen. 
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Nov - 6, XXXX
“Sometime ago from the mirror chamber over to the botanical garden I saw Jack, Deuce, and my darling pearl (y/n) coming from the field as I made my way. I must admit, I indeed felt irked that they were clinging onto Deuce like that. However I kept my composure and decided to stay hidden and observe, something that I have always reaped benefits from.”
“To continue along, as I was listening to what they were talking about it appears that they were on the subject of how to court someone indirectly. Oh what a valuable insight to what my dearest has to say!”
In the botanical garden there sat the infamous student, Jade Leech. With no one around in the greenery place, there he sat talking to his mushrooms to which he cared for tenderly. In the placement of actual companions who could listen to his lovesick woes and scheming little ploys, it seems that he much prefers talking to his own plants which grow healthily from his careful attentiveness and candid affection. 
“Would my little shrooms care to know what it is my dearest had said?” To no response from the fungi planted in its bed of components, he only lets out a more passionate look to compel more. 
“The only thing they talked about was this saying back in their world. The person who asks if the moon is beautiful is quite frankly another way to profess your love in poetry. If the person who you asked it to agrees then they basically are reciprocating your mutual feelings. Isn’t that lovely?”
No response. If someone were to witness this surely they’d think that Jade would be a little crazy. Not like he’ll let anyone see him in this state though. Lest if they do then pray to the sevens that they would be able to see the next day come.
Adjusting the lighting to perfectly fit the conditions to aid its growth, Jade lets out a beaming smile as he thinks about the two things he tends to show more prominent love aside from his familial relations. You and his mushrooms. 
“If I continue to engage in social interaction with (y/n) then I am positive the likelihood of them returning my feelings would be higher. I’ve been doing so for the past few months now, perhaps I should start planning my confession.”
Sitting on a bench, he slumps in his folded arms ensuring that his head or arms were away from the bedded fungi; the edge of the earthy wooden table. Flashes of your face and scenarios playing in his head arise like a continuous movie film on repeat, the sound of your laughter and the feeling of his heart racing in his chest felt like he was immersed in the movie he was watching. Oh how he could replay them over and over again, a goofy love-stuck smile curling on his face as he buried it deeper into his arms.
“Jade! There ya are!” A sudden voice calls out to him and he springs up from surprise. He didn't hear anyone come in, just how long has he been in his own little world?
“Ah Floyd, what are you doing here?” Standing up from where he sat, he began to approach Floyd as he was coming over towards his way as well. A prime smile on his face yet he looked brighter than ever. 
“Azul needs ya. You’ve been gone for awhile, thought ya went out to the mountains again,” swinging down with a huff as he sits himself on the bench, he leans his head back to give him a rather laid back smile. “Good thing you were in here though, wasn’t plannin’ on tryna get you back all the way from the mountains.” 
“Oh my, did I perhaps lose track of time? Thank you for letting me know Floyd, I'll be sure to hurry along then.” The materialistic multitudes of sound coming together as Jade brushes and pats himself come together to accompany the brightful air around him. “Ah? Yer bein’ all smiley Jade, is it cus of these damn mushrooms or somethin?” 
“You could say it’s part of the reason, Floyd.”
With a click of the tongue and his brows slightly twitching, Floyd bounces up with a swift swing of his legs and starts walking alongside Jade. “Ugh, is it shrimpy again?”
“Gasp! How did you know?” As Jade makes a feigned gasp and his hand placed over his mouth, Floyd can only roll his eyes and shake his head from his fake and obvious display of faux surprise. “Urgh, keep yer lovey-dovey thoughts to yerself. I aint tryna hear all that sappy and weird stuff again.” 
“Oh dear, and here I thought you actually secretly liked to hear my woes Floyd.” With the both of them now walking off, Floyd and Jade start to talk about other affairs as they head back to Mostro Lounge.
Without realizing it, you move your castle over and take out his pawn resting on the black squares making up the chessboard. Too infatuated with his own plans, he fails to see you make a move with your knight and you proceed to place it on a white square. Ready to defend what you have left or ready to steal his pieces. 
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Nov - 8, XXXX
The indifferent sounds of inharmonious male voices fill up the school halls as they go by their constructed schedule of schooling. Classes are left empty momentarily as students leave to head on and transition over to their next subject whether it be magic history or astrology, or perhaps they may skip and find the chance to slack off. 
A diversity of students are scrambling around and covering the school grounds, if seen above it might be like seeing a field of colorful jelly beans laid out on a structured maze platform. Stepping out of the classroom which is labeled at the top “1-A,” you and Grim along with many others go by the schedule as well; stepping out of the classrooms to head on over to their next classes. 
“Raaah~! I almost fell asleep there. Can you believe we’re gonna have an upcoming test in Crewel's class?!” 
A yawn can be heard and ushered out from your little fur ball of a companion, Grim. Resting on your shoulders you can only respectively share the same tired stare on your face as you step out into the school corridors. “We have a day or two maybe to study for it, it should be enough time to cover what we need to go over.” 
The wintery dim skies makes the air around you a bit more chilly than normal, making you feel a little drowsy even. “Mrmgh, why’d we have to get out of bed ~? It was the perfect temperature to sleep in!” As he then closes his eyes while resting on your shoulder, you can only give a sigh and roll your eyes as you make your way over to your shared class. With heavy eyelids and heavy limbs dragging your feet, you lazily make your way past the cluster of students. 
“Yea no kidding, I wanted to sleep in too. Any second longer and I would’ve succumbed to the comfort of our bed.” Bringing your hand to your face you start rubbing your drowsy eyes. “God the weather is so perfect to sleep in. A cold morning is so nice.” 
“I agree, I feel rather closer to home the more the temperature drops.” 
“WHAT THE FUC-/ NYAHHHHH!”
As you and Grim jump up into the air - his fur all frayed and animated looking like those Halloween black cats up on display windows during the spooky-season sales - Jade stands behind the two of you with a casual smile on his face. 
“Fufu, well I see you are rather more awake now.” Alongside him stood Floyd and Azul, the most recognizable sea trio ever. Floyd seemed to also be in a sleepy state as his slanted eyes were closed and his stance being all lazy and slump-like. Azul, ever the dashing man he is, looks back at you with a formal smile. 
“I must agree with you there Jade. Although the weather cannot nearly compare to the temperature at home, I find the cold to be rather comforting.” 
“W-What the hell Jade? Don’t pop up out of nowhere like that.” As you place your hand over your chest, the feeling of your heart beating rapidly due to the fright can be felt and heard in your eardrums. “Apologies, my intention wasn’t to scare you, Prefect.” Although you can't be too sure if he really was genuine with that apology, the look on his face said otherwise. And with a slightly scoffing click of the tongue you fix your posture and stand up with a straight posture to address him. 
“What do you guys want?” After you’ve calmed down, you press your palms on your hips, giving him a more stern expression. Grim is practically still recovering from the sudden scare as he clings onto your leg. “Oya? Asking us what we want? Why aren’t you a generous one (y/n).
“Indeed, if that's the case then I would like-”
“You know damn well that's not what I meant!” 
“Oi, shut it will you? Yer loud voice is botherin me.” Floyd speaking up in irritance causes you to divert your attention onto him and you flinch back a bit, making note of controlling your volume. Coming up to stand in front of Jade now, your attention is now placed onto Azul, his pristine air around him calling for professionalism. “To be quite frank, we heard your little call of distress just now and would like to offer assistance.” Smiling ever so politely as he places his hand on his slightly puffed up chest, you can only feel a sense of dread for what's to come. 
“You want to help us study for our upcoming potionology test? Why? What’s in it for you?” 
Feigning a shocked and offended look, Azul shakes his head slightly and you continue on just stare at him with disinterest. “Why, out of the goodness of my heart of course! I’m just trying to help my dear friend, yes? I’m just trying to show my comradery because friends are supposed to support and help each other.” Hearing his words make you snicker, and Jade can’t help but be amused a little at the show displaying your interactions with Azul. 
“Hmm? Shrimpy and little seal needs help with their studies? Oooh count me in~ hehe” Finally feeling awake with a sense of amusement, Floyds demeanor shifts to a more sneaky and cunning air around him. “Wait, I didn't even agree to this!” Grim lets out a similar statement as well, picking him up into your arms as you hold him for a sense of comfort. 
“Now now no need to be so rude. We merely just want to help.” You know damn well that he has other intentions other than to simply just “help,” and what other perfect way than to try and take advantage of the fact that you two had an upcoming test. “No way, I'd rather have someone else tutor us.” 
“Oh how your words and hostility wound me (y/n),” bringing a finger to swipe at his fake tears Azul then moves to the side and switches back up once again. “Very well, if you refuse to take my assistance then why not choose between the Leeches to tutor you?” 
Giving him the most “Are you serious” look ever towards Azul, you divert your eyes to look over at Jade and Floyd who stood beside each other. It was like you were in a bachelorette/bachelor show right now having to pick between which twin you wanted to date as Azul was the host. “W-Wait I never-”
“Time’s ticking Prefect, unfortunately we all have classes to attend so hurry won't you?” 
WHY IS HE PUTTING ME ON THE SPOT?!
Grim being firm with his whine and response simply says he doesn't want either and jumps out of your arm, scrambling off to class without you, seeing that you really were left alone in this situation. Thanks so much “companion.” Darting your eyes back and forth to Jade's polite yet somehow eerie aired smile and Floyd’s amused and up-to-no-good lazy smirk, you frantically blurt out one of their names without much thought. 
“J-Jade!” It wasn’t an easy pick, but in all honesty at least this eel can try and be tame for the most part. So scratch that, it was a rather easier and obvious pick. With a pleased smile on his face, Jade simply places a hand over his chest as if he was glad to have been chosen. “I will do my best to tutor you well then Prefect. Thank you for choosing me.” Ding Ding Ding! And it seems that (y/n) chose contestant number 2! Jade Leech! 
“Ehhh? Why didn’t ya pick me shirmpyyyy? It would’ve been so much more fun. Oh well, I’m not really feeling like tutoring ya no more anyways.” 
You guess calling Jade was a good call, but the slight glint in his eyes causes some uneasiness in you. Letting out a slight chuckle and a one-sided crooked smile, you look up to Jade who now as well stood in front of you. “Aha, yea.. I look forward to it as well.” As you make up your quick plans of when and where to meet, you four all go your own separate ways to head over to class. Thinking to yourself, you really had no choice or say in this with the way they gave you no options whatsoever.  
“Look at you looking so chipper Jade.” Floyd slightly remarks as out of the three, Jade's smile is ever so radiant. 
“Yes, I'm quite pleased that the plan went rather well.”
“‘Pleased’ is such an understatement. You seem more ecstatic to say the least, like how you are always with those batches of mushrooms.”
“Urgh, don't even mention 'em Azul. It's already enough having to hear him talk about his mushrooms and “Shrimpy this” or “Shrimpy that,” blergh.” 
“I’m glad to know I am not a direct victim of his ramblings with you in my stead.”
“Oh how you both wound me so.” And as the three walk off in the opposite direction, the show of bachelorette/bachelor has ended with you and Jade going to meet up for your little date. With Grim being there of course, but under Jade's care he is a rather easy case to take care of and Jade will ensure that things will be under control now. 
The first drops of snow in your heart flutter down as the first lingering thoughts of Jade come hither to rest in your mind. And as Jade proceeds to move his knights in places to ensure his next move winds up being a success, slowly breaking down your wall of pawns to get to the heart of what makes you stay in the game, to obtain your king and end the game. Slowly but surely, his methodical and strategic thinking would lead him to success and only then, would he be able to have your king. A game of chess to where you don't know you’re playing as he stares down at the chessboard.
I’ve been seeing him more often lately… A lingering thought nestles in as you make your way over to class.
Three pawns down, no moves made, and a clear break through heading towards your unprotected king. An open line is presented and clear for him to make a bold break for it. With slight hesitation as he's about to pick up his knight, he then draws back his hand and proceeds to bring his king up instead. 
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Present Day 
Nov - 15, XXXX
“Hey Henchman, is it just me or have we been seeing Jade a lot more often recently?”
“Glad to know you’re finally noticing Grim, I've seen him around much more frequently since a couple months ago too. It’s quite…. Odd honestly.” 
I kinda wanna see him some more though…
 “You think he’s trying to get something from us?” Perched on the top of your head, Grim tilts his head forward a little to try and make curious eye contact with you. With his pitchfork-like tail wagging around in the air, you casually make your way down the stairs from NRC’s main building to head back to Ramshackle dorm.
“I hope not. Not like I'll just let him anyway, man I hope we don't see him again.”
I wonder where he could be right now… could he… be busy? It’d be nice to see him again…
With a lift of your foot, another step is placed off the hard slate wooden stairs as you now continue onward. Classes have ended and an assortment of dispersed students with colors consisting of their respecting dorms filter through the halls quickly. Some going back to rest in their dorm rooms, others maybe attending after school club activities, or perhaps some going to pursue their other hobbies. Whatever time is available, every student here uses it to the fullest.
“Ya could say that again. If he comes by again then I’ll just blow out my flames and cook him dry! Nyahaha!”
His arrogant laugh makes you roll your eyes as a soft smile forms on your face, slightly shaking your head with Grims weight on top. “Hah, sure, whatever you say Grim.”
“It's THE Great Grim!” 
With a flick of your wrist and a scoff, you couldn't bother to resay his name just for his own satisfaction even in a sarcastic manner. Tilting your head in a mischievous manner, you feel the weight of Grim scrambling and jumping off with a hoarse yelp coming from him. As he lands on his paws, you let out a giggle watching his scowling face directed towards you. 
“I was trying to look at the sky, but you were in the way, Grim hehehe.” Knowing that was not at all the case, before Grim could retort he pauses and it causes you to stop in your tracks as well. Standing on the gray pavemented pathway near the open ended exit from which you both came from, you looked down at Grim a bit curiously. “Grim? Why’d you stop?”
Now on all fours, Grim perks his head up as if tailing an annoying fly around his head. With more cat-like animatics, Grim starts swirling his head just slightly and sniffing as if he can see a delicious aroma in those cartoon episodes. “Somethin’ smells good…” 
The cold weather makes it hard for odor particles to pass through due to the more compact molecules, however you can tell just how drawn Grim is to whatever may be causing the smell. Taking a big inhale, you try smelling whatever it is that Grim may be smelling, your chest puffing up as you take in a big amount of air in your lungs. 
“I don't smell anything Grim, what are you-”
“Ah! Over there!” It seems he has found the source of whatever it may be he was smelling, pinpointing it rather quickly as he scurries off. “Ah! Wait Grim! Where are you going?!” Before you can follow suit, not so far off a voice calls out and grabs your attention. 
“Ah, good evening prefect.”
Turning your head around, you’re met with no one but Jade. His voice divulging you and making his presence known. Although so suddenly and randomly, you can’t help but feel a sense of tingling in your chest.
Jade!
“J-Jade! What are you doing here?” Changing your position from almost sprinting off, you shift yourself back to face Jade instead to properly converse with him. Upon looking up at him, you note the clouded and dull gray skies as it soars vastly. 
“Classes have ended some time ago, I was merely on the way back to my dorm. I would assume that it’s the same for you, yes?” Jade stood comfortably, not another layer of clothing on him in sight to withstand the colder weather while he sticks to nothing but his usual uniform wear. You, on the other hand, had a thicker jacket on top of your uniform to help adapt to the temperature around. 
“Well, I was. That was until Grim ran off somewhere again. Hah, seriously I might as well forget about trying to chase after him. He can come back whenever he wants.” With a defeated sigh, you slightly slouch forward with your arms swinging from back to back. 
“Hmm well if that's the case, may I walk you back to your dorm?” 
You’ve been getting used to how casual he’s been lately, considering the amount of times you’ve been seeing each other through mere “coincidences.” Though recently whenever Jades around you can't but help to have that lingering feeling of wanting to stay with him just a bit longer. Whenever he leaves he immediately fills up your mind whenever you allow it to and you can't help but let your mind wander. Is this perhaps…?
“Hello? (Y/N)? Are you spacing out?” With his hand waving in front of you to snap you out of your daze, your unfocused stare comes back into reality and out of your thoughts. “Huh? What?” 
How adorable…
“I asked if I could walk you back to your dorm. If you aren’t feeling well then-”
“Oh no! I’m perfectly fine! I just spaced out for a bit haha. But uhm, I don't mind if you did accompany me back.”
In the way you responded allowed you to give you a sense of freedom to where you aren’t actually giving him a direct and decisive response. More so an indecisive one. Slightly fidgeting with the hem of your jacket you give him a lightly aired chuckle to ease up the atmosphere. 
“So I would say you want me to accompany you back, correct?” 
“Well I didn’t say that I didn’t want you to accompany me”
“You’re rather indirect with what you want (Y/N).” With a slight tut, shaking his head like a common motion of showing one's dismay you can only rile backup to defend yourself with reason. 
“No I'm not! I said I didn’t-! Hah, whatever. Fine, I would like it if you were to accompany me back to Ramshackle Jade.” 
“Fufu very well then. It would be my pleasure too.”  Seriously, he seems to always have a way with words. Putting you on the spot like that so easily and casually. 
But at least we’d be able to spend time together again.
The two of you make your way back over to Ramshackle, following the usual pathway you commonly take when out of classes. The silence lingering between you both causes you to fidget some more as you try to make it obvious you're not at all bothered by it. Staring straight ahead while you see Jade in the corner of your eye next to you as you both walk along-side each other, you can only wonder why he isn't saying anything. Usually Jade makes conversation with you whenever you two are together, perhaps he just isn’t feeling all that talkative. An unfamiliar tension is slightly there, one that wasn’t there before and you can't understand why but to only question it. 
Perhaps it's the cold, but you feel your cheeks slightly growing a little red. What other reason could there be? Next to you Jade remains silent while peacefully walking next to you, and without your knowledge, he smiles just slightly feeling a slight of anticipation.
“Curious, but do you maybe know why Grim ran off (Y/N)?” Jade finally breaks the silence by asking a question, you feel a slight relief in your chest. 
“Aha, I don't know. He said that he smelled something good… Maybe food? Probably someone is snacking around here and he may be a victim to Grim’s antics and persistence haha.”
“That is not the case” Looking over to Jade who sounds so sure of himself, it quizzes a question out of you. “What do you mean? How can you be so sure?”
“Why, I would know of course. Because I was the one who placed some salted steamed fish near the bushes.”  
“What? Then why’d you ask?!” With a nonchalant smile on his face it can only be contrasted to your taken back and startled reaction. Placing a hand on your back, Jade continues the path while guiding you along to continue further with him. “Wait, more importantly why did you do that?”
Jade stays quiet, that smile still on his face as he continues to keep his hand on your back. Wait, now that you think about it you two are going off course and straying from the usual path you take to head back to Ramshackle. With your heart quickening in your chest, you can only start to nervously sweat at where this is going. “U-Uh Jade? Where are we going? What are you doing?” 
As his eyes slowly turn to look at you, his head still facing forward however and his smile ever the same, you can't help but to shiver a bit and get a feeling that whatever he’s planning isn't going to go well. “Oya, there’s no need to be so nervous now. I thought we might take a detour to enjoy the weather a bit more.” 
“No but uh, you didn't answer my ques-” Suddenly bringing his hand from your back to wrap around your shoulders, he draws you close into his side and it prompts you to stop your walk and just freeze from the surprise. “Why? Well I simply wanted to be alone with you of course.”
Your whole right side of your body is pressed up against his left side. With wide eyes, you don't dare to look over to Jade, refusing to let him see your sudden flusteredness. Your heart is beating so loud that you’re hoping that he can’t hear it as well. His arm around you almost longingly, the sudden stillness as you both don't move a muscle, and the sound of your heart beating at a rapid pace as if on a roller coaster. You really wish you could say that the whole reason your face is red is because of the cold and your body temperature just suddenly dropped! But it would make more sense that you’d be blue and purple then red… So then why exactly are you-
“Oh dear, look at you getting so red in the face. Do you perhaps like the weight of my arm around you?” You didn’t even notice, too occupied in your own thoughts and spacing out, that Jade had proceeded to lean forward to be face to face with you. “Wha-!”
A pleased smile is formed as he sees you snap out of your thoughts and he leans back up and adjusts his arm around you to let it sit more comfortably. Looking back up at the scenery the sky has to hold, he holds you ever so lovingly and affirmably. 
“J-Jade what is- what are-! What’s going on!?” Matching the weather, you freeze stiffly in his hold, unfamiliar to his loving touch. It was rather unusual for him to make such a bold and tender move, a foreign feeling yet for you to adjust to. 
The sky is covered in splotches of clouded gray cotton, the meek shine from the sun is still blocked by the airy cold sheet of gas yet still blinding to look at. Inhaling the dewy air that gives oneself a sense of refreshment, Jade closes his eyes and tilts his head up to admire the brightened gray scale that vasts above you both. 
“Tell me, Prefect,” beginning to speak calmly, you try to distract yourself from your close proximity and focus on what he had to say next. “The moon is quite beautiful, is it not?” 
“What?” Killing your stiffness, you’re found to be quite dumbfounded and caught off guard. “What are you talking about Jade? It’s still daytime and the moon isn’t even-”
Pausing, you let his words sink in. The moon isn’t out. His arms are around you. You both are together, secluded. You are alone with him. No Grim. No Deuce. No Floyd. No Azul. Just you and him. 
Badum. Wait, is he…
Badum. Did he just tell me…
Badum. Badum. Badum. He knows what that means…
Badumbadumbadumbadumbadum! He just told me he loves-!
“Cat got your tongue? I hope that isn’t the case, it was the only reason why I sent Grim away from us after all.” His thumb is soothingly rubbing circles into your arm while he keeps you in place, ensuring you don't spring up or leave from his hold in any way. This was like his own way of trying to calm you down, fully aware of how thunderstruck you may be at the moment; the motions of his gesture somewhat helping. 
“Jade.”
“Yes?”
“Back in the lounge…. You….”
“Yes, indeed. I said the same thing then as well.”
“Then you… Are you saying- that you… Did you just…”
No longer looking at the sky, he turns his head to give you his full undivided attention, waiting for you patiently to make your conclusion. Still refusing to look him in the eyes, you droop your head lower just a little as you feel yourself getting smaller in his arm. Bringing your hands together, your fingers start to fiddle with each limb and cloth it can find near its reach, usually playing around with the hem of your uniform under the blanket of your jacket. 
Slightly opening your mouth, your brows furrow and you swear you can feel your knees go slightly weak if not for the support of his arm grounding you. “I…”
This man is playing with me right now. 
Without even having to look, you can just feel his eyes on you. Finally reverting back to your more casual self, you shake your head with a sigh feeling more calm. “Hah, okay Jade I love you too.”
“My, what a bold confession there.” 
“At least I didn’t confess indirectly.”Finally looking up at him, you give him a bit of sass as you roll your eyes and a chuckle escapes his lips. His grip becomes slightly more firm and if you were to lean on his chest, you can swear that his heart was beating just as loudly as yours. 
“You’re finally looking at me, my dear Pearl.” His eyes soften as you look into his olive and golden eyes, his voice laced with such affection that it makes your body feel tingling with how much warmth it held despite the cold air. “Pearl…” Slowly repeating what he said quietly, letting the words sink in further more, your eyes widen and a slight sparkle glosses over. His other hand comes over and cups your cheek, rubbing his thumb against the softness it brings. “Yes, my Pearl.” Jade droops his head lower till your foreheads touch, releasing his hold on your shoulder to then cup the other side of your face. Your cheeks might just be comparable to that of a hand warmer, but you can't help it. Not when he’s being so tender like this. Not when he’s locking eyes with you while giving you the most love-stricken smile ever. Not when you two are so close. “The moon is very beautiful right Jade?” You softly lull out, the growing thoughts of him filling up your head space.
“Very, it really is beautiful.” A little giggle ushers out, a giddy smile and tender hands. A loving look and a fond voice. A dovey feeling and a pacing heart. There, on the side of the public pavement road, stood two lovebirds where the trees bristle through the wind and hide them both perfectly. “It’s very enchanting if I must add. The moon that is. In fact, its shape and glow is similar to one of a pearl. A very beautiful one indeed.”
Tilting your head a little closer, your foreheads staying connected as he continues to hold your face and your hands on his, his words only make you quirk a wider smile. “You know, you’re making my heart beat very fast right now you know that? If I die because of you, you’d be put behind bars.” 
“Hmmmm, really now? And what makes you so sure I'd allow them to catch me so easily?” 
“Why do I like you?”
“In fact you don’t. You professed you love me not too long ago.”
“You’re right, unfortunately. I do, in fact, love you Jade Leech.”
Months of preparation, months filled with longing, months filled with shadowed moves, months filled with perseverance and patience, Jade Leech has finally accomplished what he’s worked for in one swell swoop from you. A kiss to the lips from the person who he always loved from the sidelines, now here in his hold as they reciprocate his mutual feelings. 
Can we stay in this moment forever?
Watching you with the way you close your eyes just to kiss him, can he just stay in this moment forever? Forever to see the way your lashes sprawl out, long enough for him to count each and every piece of hair. Forever to feel your lips against his, long enough to remember the sensation and feeling of your soft lips. Forever to engulf himself in your natural aroma, long enough to have a sense of peace when he smells your scent. With his eyes open, even in the kiss he can't help but to just close it. Not when someone so beautiful is right in front of him. The first to place a kiss and the first to draw back from it, you quickly turn back around and bury your face in your hands. 
Ah, they're getting all shy now. I wish it would have lasted longer…
“Ohmyfuckinggodijustkissedhimmmmm!” Whilst squealing in your hands Jade comes over and wraps his arms around your hunched figure, fully embracing you as he starts to feel gushy himself and nuzzles his cheek on the crown of your head. A big goofy silly smile on his face. 
“Oh what’s wrong my dear Pearl? You’re so red that it can rival Riddle's hair.”
“Hah, I wonder who’s causing such a symptom.” Removing your hands away from your face, you turn your head to meet Jade's beaming smile and red cheeks with your slight pouty and red face.
“I would gladly like to proclaim that I was the cause of such said symptoms.”
“Gosh why did I even-”
Turning his head closer to yours as he leans over your shoulder, his voice suddenly becomes low and serious. The way he can suddenly change the mood with his tone tickles your ear and sends chills down your spine in a good way. His arms around your figure hugging you securely like a vine wrapping itself against a gate. 
“I want to be the only one to make you feel this way, to have you look this way, to have you react this way. I would gladly like to be the reason for it knowing your affections for me are genuine. Just for you, I’d love to be that reason.” 
… 
“Fufufu, oh? To think your face couldn’t get any more red. Look at you, oh how wrong I was~”
“Jade you little-!” 
Turning around to engulf him in the same manner, you bury yourself in his chest. There you go, now you can confirm for real that his heart was indeed beating just as fast as yours. Standing still to hold each other in your arms, your red and burning face finding shelter in his bosom while he radiates a silly smile with red coated cheeks, you take the time to remember how things even came to be the way they are now. And as the two of you indulge each other, far off in Ramshackle dorm Grim is looking around to see if you’ve yet arrived. 
Moving his king up now in front of yours, thinking you’d make no move, he’s caught off guard as you pick up your king and take his. After all his chess pieces have eaten yours, nothing left but your king stood hopeful for him to take. Yet what a surprise of events that your heart took in the final move. It was a checkmate, and in the palm of your hand you gently held his king close to your heart. 
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tag! - @thehollowwriter @pandaforcexd @officialdaydreamer00
I hope you guys enjoyed this read, sorry it took forever!
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applcrumbl · 5 months
Text
Soulmate.
Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Soulmate! Reader Warnings: None I don't think? Author's Note: still old fics from @bapplbrumbl - unedited
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It was in all caps, simple, but elegant. A blue ballpoint scrawled the somewhat legible lettering on the back of his hand. It was an unusual feeling, felt as if you were writing it yourself. He wasn’t. A soulmate thing, He didn’t really understand the reasoning behind it, or why it happened. Just that it was unusual, and that less than 45% of the population had it. Only those with a true soulmate; one that they actually had a chance of meeting. It was activated through sight, as soon as you saw your soulmate, whether it be a fleeting glance or prolonged eye contact, they would have the ability to see everything you wrote on your skin.
Dentist 2:30, it read.
Never anything useful in finding her, always appointments, or little reminders to get milk. Sometimes even a beautiful line of poetry that he wound up writing in his letters home to Steve. But, never a name, or an address.
She had obviously seen him before though, as he could read what was written on her skin; see the little doodles that lined the edges of her hands. Every Tuesday, 11:30am, they would appear. He assumed it was the cause of a boring class, a solid hour of sketches of flowers, and trees. She was talented and educated. He could tell. Bucky really liked that about her. But, sadly, he didn’t know who she was, and there was a possibility that she didn’t realise he existed.
At 16, he enlisted. Because of his duty to fight for the country he loved? Maybe. Because she had written about a visit to the recruitment office and he wanted the possibility of meeting her? More likely.
He wanted to at least see her. He wanted to be able to write to her and have her read it. He wanted a name, an age, anything to give him hope. But routinely, a simple ‘hello’ was written in bold capital letters. There was never a reply.
The first day of his training was a nervous one. He had left Steve in Brooklyn, alone, and the guilt was eating him. Not to mention his ‘skin scribe’, as Steve would put it, hadn’t left any messages that week. Bucky bit his nails down to stubs whilst on his lunch break. Any hope of finding her now was long gone, She was probably back home. And Bucky was most likely going to die fighting.
One of his fellow Regiment brothers cracked a joke. Something at Agent Peggy Carter’s expense. Bucky, desperate to fit in, poked in as well.
“Women on the front line? She wouldn’t last. Too busy combing her hair or something-”
His peers laughed. It died down rather quickly as a female voice spoke.
“That’s a write-up.” the person said. He hadn’t seen her before.
“Sorry ma’am” Bucky replied.
“What is your name, Soldier?”
Bucky sighed, “James B. Barnes, Ma’am.”
The woman nodded, turning on her heel as she walked away. Pen in hand. The man ignored the feeling of embarrassment as he turned back to his group.
“Bloody psychopath,” Bucky laughed, slightly on edge and checking the time on his watch, 11:29. “Okay boys, we’re late for track. Let’s go.”
The encounter was forgotten as quickly as it had happened. Bucky ran the 500m track, correcting his form as much as he could. He ignored the scribbles that appeared on his hands, much too focused to look at them. In hindsight, he wished he had. The quick glance before she washed her hands was not quite enough for him to believe what he had read. His heart fluttered at the sight, rubbing his eyes in disbelief. But it was too late, the pen had gone. Only the trace of the little note that took place on his skin.
James B. Barnes - 107th
If he wasn’t already nervous, he certainly was now. Almost stopping in his tracks as his regiment caught up behind him. He ran off of the track, despite the shouts of his superiors. He scanned the base, no faces jumped out at him though. He swore to write something to her as soon as he found a pen.
“Barnes, What are you doing?”
“Sorry Sir, Bathroom issues.” He lied.
Clammy hands gripped the pen tightly in his right hand. Veins climbed his fingers, framing the space where he was going to write. It wasn’t the first time he’d tried to contact her, but the extreme likeliness that he’d seen her that day made his heart thunder. Thoughts swarmed in his head like wasps around fresh fruit. What if he hadn’t seen her? What if she wasn't here? What if she didn’t reply, and didn’t want anything to do with him?
A shaky hand, lettered the words ‘are you here?’ In a small font at the top of his hand, leaving space for her to reply.
You had decided not to tell Peggy of the encounter with the rude group of soldiers. She already had it much too hard to hear every little rumour around the barracks. And so, the write-up went unfinished. ‘No trace that could hurt Peggy’s feelings’ you thought.
You were supposed to supervise training that afternoon, instead opting to take some well-earned time away from the camp. You sat with your book, reading. Eyes scanned the pages, taking in the words of one specific sentence to mind. Grasping for your notebook, you could not find it. Instead dog-earring the page to keep it in mind. Peggy would be mad at you for damaging the book, but you could deal with that later.
A knock at the door signified wanted entry. Cynthia entered. She was nice, you had nothing against her personally, but all she ever wanted to do was talk about her soulmate and how they met. The story was cute the first time, but after hearing it weekly for the entirety of the year so far, it got boring. And your feeling of loneliness grew bigger.
The whole soulmate trope felt like bollocks to you, where did it come from? Why do we have it? Millions of questions in your head but one of them stood out the most: Where was yours?
You were one to draw on yourself anyways, even accidentally. Mindless doodles were your coping mechanism and a source of entertainment during boring lectures. In other words: it was purely a hobby. But part of you hoped that your soulmate was out there if you even had one and that one day he would write something back.
You almost didn’t feel the ballpoint writing on your skin. It was faint, he had a light touch, almost careful to hurt you. It was so soft that if you had been paying attention to Cynthia, or were not craving the sensation, you probably wouldn’t be feeling it at all. The feeling was almost burning, yet loving at the same time, caring.
In a panic, you interrupted the story. “Have you got a pen?”
“Yes, but I’ll need it. Why?” She handed it to you.
Your leg bounced as you read the message on your hand. In all of the excitement, you didn’t even answer his question, instead of posing one of your own.
Who are you?
Bucky stared at his hand for what felt like hours, He sat alone in his barracks. Eyes not once leaving the rough skin of the back of his hand. Your handwriting had always been beautiful, but even more so now that it was directed to him. ‘James, But call me Bucky’ he answered, stroking his finger over the sentence she’d just finished writing.
The writing was getting smaller, a struggle to squeeze the conversation in. ‘Y/N’ she wrote.
Cynthia was getting impatient, somehow desperate to get her pen back. Considering the hours you had taken listening to her story, you would think she would be the least bit understanding of your situation.
“I need the pen back” she stated, a pompous hand extended forward. There was not much you could say to protest, handing the writing utensil over. You arose quickly, walking out of your room and into the neighbouring.
Bucky wrote back. 'Meet me, Please.'
“Is there a pen in here?” She asked one of the soldiers sitting on the bed. He threw a spare over. “Thank you”
‘Where?’ she wrote, hiding away. Then passing the pen back to the Soldier. And leaving.
‘I’m with the 107th regiment.’
It was a long shot, she might just ignore it. Wanting nothing to do with him. He silently prayed for an answer.
Meanwhile, in the corridor, you froze. He was here.
If only you still had a pen you could find him. Unwilling to ask that soldier for his pen back, you thought. Eventually giving in.
“I’m going to need your pen again, I am so sorry"
“I’m using it now,” The other soldier said, putting it on his bed and turning away.
A moment of worry traced your features, what if he thinks you’re ignoring him? You reach to grab the pen anyway, surely he wouldn’t notice.
But, he did. And with lightning reflexes caught the outstretched hand at the wrist. Again you apologised, taking in his features. You felt guilty, but after all, it was just a pen. “That’s my pen,” he stated.
“I know, I just need to borrow it for two seconds,”
Bucky thought you were pretty, same as he did when you wrote him up earlier. He felt bad for thinking that, considering his soulmate could quite possibly be very close. He complied anyway, watching you take the pen and glide it across your skin. four words, ‘i’m in the dormitory’.
He watched it happen, the exact moment the ballpoint touched your skin. The skin of his soulmate. Every letter shook his core, tears threatening to burst from his eyes. A hard stopped your movements.
“Y/N?” he asked, reaching to pull up the sleeve that had fallen to cover his hands.
Confusion plagued your features, a pair of furrowed brows turning to face the soldier. “Yes?” you questioned, not quite catching on.
In one swift movement, he took his pen back, quickly gliding it over his skin. He didn’t have long to think, desperately wanting to write something cool that would impress you. But, he also just wanted to let you know. He wrote a simple statement.
Nice you meet you.
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cerezzzita · 7 months
Note
Hi, i saw you have your request open so here i go, requesting some hcs for Dante, Vergil and Trish having a short sweet-toothed s/o who also loves to bake.
notes: heeey there, anon! In advance sorry for the waiting, it took long enough but at least here we are! I hope you like it, because I surely did loved writing these headcanons, and with Trish being included? Better than ever!
Enjoy the reading and thanks for requesting! <3
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⠀🍓 ˖ . ᵎᵎ Dante, Vergil & Trish with a short sweet-toothed S/O
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♡ tags: gender-neutral reader, no use of pronouns (you/yours only), no description of reader's appearance, short!reader, use of petnames, three devils being soft af, Vergil and Trish might have been sorta ooc pardon in advance.
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ⓘ gif's not mine!!
Dante
Perfect match, to be honest.
Calls you "shortcake" or "shortie" most of the time and if you're annoyed by that… he'll keep doing it, sorry. He loves you enough to annoy you as well. 
Being as sweet-toothed as he is, no wonder he'll ask you constantly to make some desserts with strawberries or red fruits in general such as raspberries or cherries. 
And please don't let Dante get one inch near the kitchen, this man will eat as many of the berries plus he's catastrophic at cooking.
At least let him add some of the ingredients and mix them together here and there, he'll be satisfied and happy enough. 
He'll eat the batter when you're not looking, by the way. 
Still on the ingredients topic, doesn't this bitch (affectionately) loves when you ask him for help to reach something you can't? He's all smugly smirks, towering you with that huge figure of his and in the best of the cases, lifting you so you can reach it by yourself. 
Dante's personal favorite dessert made by you became The Devil's Cake, but instead of being fulfilled of chocolate only, there's lots and lots of strawberry jam and fresh strawberries on top of it. 
Late night munchies are a must! You two can and will be watching whatever series or movies while cuddling and devouring almost all of a whole damn bakery because Dante has a black hole instead of a regular stomach. 
Saw a recipe for dessert pizza once, got obsessed with it, asked you to make it, you made it, he's even more in love with you. 
"Babe, you're a sweetheartie. A candy angel, I love you so much," said Dante, mouth full of sweet pizza and eyes full of tears of joy and passion. 
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ⓘ gif's not mine!!
Vergil
Vergil strikes me as a cinnamon roll enjoyer. That's it, that's the post. 
But really, I don't think he has a sweet-tooth or enjoys sugary foods that much. He likes it, sure, but at moderate bits. 
Unlike Dante, he does not make fun of your height… Yet he finds it quite endearing. 
Calls you "little bird". Let me have him be affectionate and lovely for a sec, okay? 
Vergil also gets worried by the amount of sugar you consume. 
"You'll get plenty of cavities if you keep eating desserts at that level." 
He helps you with your recipes too. I'm kinda sure that Vergil knows a thing or two in the cooking field, correct me if I'm wrong (I am wrong). 
As previously said, he likes more, hm, refined flavors, such as cinnamon and vanilla and if you're baking cinnamon rolls, count him on it! 
Don't ask Vergil to chop the ingredients unless you want him to put on a show about it. 
If you like drinking tea, you better prepare a bunch of sweet treats because you're having regular, calm silent tea evenings ft. Vergil and his poetry book. 
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ⓘ gif's not mine!!
Trish
Oh my, what can I say about Trish?
She's not a sugary-sweet person. Instead, she's mostly on sour candies and neutral fruits field. 
With that being said, I hope you're ready to constantly bake lemon pies and banana cakes. 
Trish does not know how to cook for her dear life, she prefers watching you instead and maybe teasing you along with it.
"Trish, I could use a little hand." "Pardon me if I can't help but think you're all cute on your own, sugar."
Speaking of teasing, this devil surely knows how to make you fluster with her little comments about your height, but of course, always keeping it comfortable enough to not get you mad or sad. 
"Need some help there, honeypie?" "My, if you ever get trouble reaching that shelf, you need to wear some of my heels."
And although Trish is not your sous chef, she is certainly your personal tasting critic, which is an advantage mostly to her. 
"So, what do you think?" "Hm, I liked the caramel on top of the fruit, and it's sour just in the way I love. It's a ten out of ten, honey." 
Brought you some silly clothes like sweaters and shirts with some candy motif and oh, sure, fruity flavored lip gloss. 
Anything for her honeybun~
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cerezzzita©, 2023 · all rights reserved ⓘ do not edit, copy, steal or claim as yours | reblogs and comments are appreciated!
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purplekoop · 5 months
Text
The rise of both Mechamechanic and Dvattra in the OW shipping scene is funny because, while I haven't seen anything remotely resembling ship wars (probably because people don't feel like being an ass about liking a really recent crack ship a lot), it's funny to imagine them existing together as a much funnier than average love triangle.
Local depressed gamer tgirl and mech pilot has to choose between two lovers: one is a buff swedish girl who likes writing poetry, her cat, and working on her suit of power armor, and the other is the spiteful leader of the robot revolution. who also thinks ants are neat.
Normally I would bring up the opportunity of not making her choose, but honestly I don't know how well Brig and Ram would get along... maybe better than I'd think at first. Actually yeah no this is the start of my campaign for... god what the hell do you call this three-way ship, can't just slap the existing names together because that doesn't work, uhh... yeah someone else can figure that out.
regardless I hope everyone sees my vision I just came up with on the spot, you're welcome.
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cleolinda · 8 months
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My nephew reviews perfume
I'm not sure how my sister heard about Noteworthy Scents, but the concept is, you take a quiz, and they'll send you four Scientifically Chosen samples ($25 USD) based on your answers.
Noteworthy is a new, exciting way to discover your signature scent. Rather than relying on flashy celebrity branding or overblown marketing promises, we want our customers to be in control of deciding which Noteworthy fragrance is right for them. We’re excited that you’re joining us on this journey - we can’t wait to help you find your signature scent.
I have looked at all the fragrances on offer, and I can tell you, they don't happen to have the notes I would want in my One Perfume to Rule Them All (if there's no peach or ylang ylang, I’m not forsaking the rest of my collection). But more to the point, I don't want just one. I've been writing up the things I've been trying for a few months now, and I enjoy the experimenting. But I appreciate what Noteworthy's trying to do, especially for wearers who want something straightforward, and I was perfectly happy to let my sister be the one to try them.
(I did take the quiz, though, and after telling them I don’t like aquatic scents, they said they would send me one that smells like the beach. I closed the tab. My sister told the quiz that she does not like florals and she does not like amber. You’ll never guess what happened next!)
So her Discovery Kit arrived yesterday. She announced this by texting me,
I’m gonna give you feedback from [Nephew] smelling the perfume
Me: Yeah?
As you may recall from one of my music posts, my nephew is six.
(My sister gave me permission to post this.)
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n,841
Lemon, tarragon, cedar wood. A powerful, understated blend of citrus and woods. Drawing from poetry’s ability to spark joy and inspiration, this bright lemon and bergamot blend leaves an instant impression before mellowing out into a rich amber and leather base.
My sister: [Nephew] said
smells like raspberries or being in a dungeon like down in a well
Me: ……..I do not see any of those things on the card
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n,551
Lily of the valley, amber, sandalwood. A sensual, comforting, woody scent that cocoons the wearer in notes of warm, glowing sandalwood and cozy, soft cashmere—freshened up with Lily of the Valley.
smells like lime juice or being inside a pumpkin
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n,307
Mandarin, basil, sandalwood. Inspired by nostalgic childhood trips to lemon groves, fresh flowers swirling together in the summer breeze, and the radiant colors of perfectly ripe citrus, this energizing fragrance stars juicy mandarin and soft sandalwood, plus light notes of basil.
green grape juice or being on top of an umbrella at the beach
Me: that’s very specific
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n,057
Passionfruit, vanilla, tonka bean. Let n,057 become your signature: remarkable, evocative and distinctly yours. Keep your fragrance at home or take our travel spray with you. Fitting snugly in your purse, pocket, or suitcase, it's the perfect on-the-go perfume.
My sister: I think he’s losing his focus on this last one. He said
lemon juice at the lemon store
My perfume sample budget got used up on, like, ugh, actual necessities this month, or I'd give Noteworthy a try for science. On a second try, my quiz results were (very likely overlapping with my sister's):
A captivating blend of warm woods and zesty citrus, like strolling through a sun-drenched forest grove. An intriguing fusion of exotic spices and earthy notes, evoking the vibrant energy of a bustling cityscape. A delightful combination of tropical fruits and delicate florals, reminiscent of a refreshing breeze in a lush garden. And for an unexpected wild card fragrance, a scent that defies expectations because science cannot always predict desire.
Currently, my sister says that she can tell that the Noteworthy fragrances are well-made, but they're not "her"; apparently she's in the 11% algorithm failure group—or maybe she just needs time for them to grow on her! Who knows! She'll bring over her samples for Sunday dinner, and I'll report back if they do, in fact, smell like being inside a pumpkin.
Perfume discussion masterpost
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familyvideostevie · 20 days
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hey.
okay. hello! i'm back. :)
maybe you noticed, maybe not, but i have been away for a while.
i wish i could say i've been out living my life, so caught up in happiness and joy and loving each day that i've just not had time for tumblr. but....that is not true. i have been having a tough time! being away has been good, as i've had time to do other things that i like and to put energy into my own well-being, but it hasn't been the best time, I'll tell you that.
i peeked on the dash every now and then to keep my queue full and reblogged soothing things to my main blog and tried my best not to feel guilty about it all (i was also booping on April 1 lol). i just...I really needed a break. i've really enjoyed being here the last six or so months as i've changed my blog and entered the pedro/tlou space but i've also felt so, so alone.
and i know that it doesn't really matter!! like, we should all take breaks and go outside and all that stuff. and I know plenty of people are not very active, but this blog has been such a vital part of my life and happiness since I started it almost two years ago, so any lapse in activity feels like a loss. I've met lifelong friends and flexed my writing muscles and learned a hell of a lot. the fact that I have started to feel isolated and alone on here is a sort of personal betrayal, and there is no one to blame but myself.
So, I’m pulling back.
it means a few things — i don’t know how much writing I’ll be doing from now on. For Joel, especially — it’s been wonderful to meet folks in that community but it has also been really detrimental to my passion for both the game and writing. I’d like to return to some other characters on my masterlist, but we’ll see. I’ve got endless personal projects away from tumblr that I want to pour love and time into (my non-reader fics, my newsletter, a romance novel, a sci-fi novel, poetry, etc). I need to fall in love with my own work again.
it's a me problem, I want to stress that. i'm working on it! irl stuff has been kicking my ass. I've had a really, really hard winter and my mental health has suffered probably more than ever before. i let things I love -- like this blog -- fester and become negative and no longer being me joy. writing became stressful and difficult and I was focused on notes and interaction and looking around me and seeing success and then looking at myself and only seeing lack.
but that's why I took a break! i am getting help and support irl, i am putting in the time and effort to feel better about being alive and to be a better friend and person all around. And I want to tell you all about it because I am so grateful for your time and attention and support, even if we’re just strangers on the internet. i know this probably seems silly -- who cares about a fanfic blog? well, i care! i care a lot! it matters to me and therefore it matters!
anyway. on to the important stuff. here I am! and here's what's going to happen on this blog:
I am working on replying to asks and reblogs and comments I missed. Thank you for being patient with me! I don't know if I'll get to them all but know I see them and I am honored every single time.
I made a totally separate ao3 account with this blog url. I'm working on uploading everything I've posted here onto there and hopefully will continue to crosspost. It is going to take a long, long time, so please be patient! (you can follow my other ao3 here for my non x-reader fanfic).
I posted this fic! Jackson!Joel pulled me back into his world. It’s the first thing I’ve written in ages, so let me know what you think. as of now it's the last planned fic for that series, but who knows!
I hit a milestone while i was away that I am absolutely blown away by. I'm planning a celebration around it sometime this spring (hopefully) and I’d love to see you participate :)
lastly, thank you so much to my friends for letting me complain, whine, winge, etc. I am so sorry for missing all of your work, your celebrations, your bright energies, and all the rest. i am so sorry if it seemed like i was ignoring you. you are my guiding lights, my silver linings, my touchstones. you make me want to be here. i will try to make it up to you!
I want to be online less but make sure I’m connecting more in the moments that i am here. I want to pressure myself to write less and not feel bad that I’m not engaged all the time. I want this blog to once again feel like a place that nourishes me and not sucks me dry. i want to stop feeling like shit about all of it!!!!
so. come hang out in my inbox, my dms, let me know what you've been up to. I am really sorry for missing so much. thank you for sticking around. <3
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katebeckets · 9 days
Text
the tortured poets department
i have thoughts!! surprising, right?? this is for anyone who cares to read them ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Before you read, note that this is going to be critical of things, so let me just start by saying I have loved and listened to Taylor since I was 8, so none of it is said lightly or without careful thought (in fact, this took me absurdly long to write). Most of the issues I have are very near to my heart, actually, so I've spent a lot of time thinking about it. If you don't want to read criticism, then just don't read more. DISCLAIMER that I did my best, but not even this fully captures the nuance I feel able my own opinions lol I recognize the other sides and points, I really do. I hold many conflicting opinions.
The short version is I will always love her music and her voice and she is capable of writing absolutely gorgeous lyrics (dare I say poetry?). I don't tend to think too much about the sound of it because if I like the sound, it's all I really care about—maybe it sounds the same as other stuff, but if I like that other stuff, I don't really care about whether she branches out or not. I think it's great and interesting when she (or anyone) does, but I also don't like change so it doesn't matter to me the way I know it matters to some people. That's just me!
What gets more complicated for me is the narrative, themes, and general trends that have been more prominent the last year or so, and that's what the rest of my thoughts are. It's me enjoying the music while also being acutely aware of all the grief tangled up in it because of how much less connected I feel in many ways.
Side note: this got soooo much longer than even I expected and it still just scratches the surface! so if you decide to read, 1. thank you, and 2. I'd love to keep talking to you. 🤍
———————————————————— 💭
I am an overthinker (shocking!) and will for sure be annoyed that I can't think of each and every thing I think about this album, but this is what comes to mind right now. Some things that have stood out to me more and more with each release:
a tendency to write self-aware lyrics that, in trying to be self-aware, betray somewhat of a lack of self-awareness
a frustration with never growing up that she expresses while also not realizing the way she is complicit in that and her own refusal to grow up
considering herself the victim, particularly after "overcoming" the accusations that she always plays the victim
venturing more boldly into the territory of serious mental illness/suicidal ideation/mental health treatment despite demonstrating a fair amount of ignorance regarding those things in the past
fame going to her head (in the sense of her becoming further and further out of touch) and the entitlement in a lot of the more immature attitudes that come across in these songs
self-awareness: for me, the first example that comes to mind is Anti-Hero: "it's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me." It's a claim at self-awareness because she's poking fun at the fact that she knows people always say "maybe she's the problem." The reason why it feels to me like it exposes a lack of self-awareness is because she explores it mostly as a criticism to overcome and not a valid point of self-reflection. @jakeperalta's tags on her post explain it better than I do. Yes, there's an issue when you reduce every feeling to "well maybe she's the problem," but part of growth is admitting that maybe you are part of the problem and coming to terms with the fact that there is often some inevitable truth to that statement—and being willing to work on it. This example is from Midnights, but I think it ties into the next point.
immaturity/never growing up: I actually think these first two sections are just two parts of one section, but it's easier to read this way anyway. There are lots of references to not growing up on this album, the first that come to mind being "So High School" and "teenage petulance." Maybe it's just me, but as a 34-year-old woman, I wouldn't want to be feeling "so high school." I mean, as a 25-year-old, when I talk about feeling like my high school self, it's usually because I'm recognizing how limited my judgment and self-awareness was in high school (despite all the therapy and my efforts to be self-aware in high school). And I am aware of my own bias here—I absolutely hate the football game days because I didn't even like watching people act like that in high school, but at least they were high schoolers—but I do think part of what we've seen is Travis allowing her to be more immature and take less responsibility because that's also where he is at. Obviously I don’t speak to it with any authority since I don't know what happened in the relationship, but based on her behaviors and what I know about Joe (which is VERY little), I kind of get the feeling that part of what she didn't like about being with Joe is that he pushed her to grow. "Your integrity makes me seem small," etc. etc., but not in an “I want to grow” way, but not liking that feeling because she shouldn't have to feel small just because she wants to be able to only do what makes her happy. Just looking at the difference in her behavior and the fact that it seems like she's stopped trying to learn (Miss Americana-ish), it seems like she very much resents the responsibility that comes with being such a famous person and mainly considers herself a victim of her fame.
victimhood: to an extent, yes, she is a victim of her fame. No one should have that much fame and power, and of course she didn't sign up for it in this way. But wanting to have the kind of influence and reach that most artists desire is intertwined with fame. There isn't a way to separate it (in an ideal world, maybe, but that isn't what we're dealing with) and it's something that, to some degree, artists do sign up for. And I think she resents that she's expected to take any sort of responsibility for anything that she doesn't want to do, in a very, "but that's not fair!," teenage petulance kind of way. She even says in Sweet Nothing that "I'm just too soft for all of it." We're all too soft for all of it, but that doesn't mean we get to ignore it. It bothers me that she doesn't seem to feel any sort of responsibility to use this giant platform to do better. Everyone is aware of her influence, including her. I think that's part of the grief. No, it is not her job to use her platform for good, but I thought that it was something she valued and something she wanted. The other line that really stuck out to me was from Cassandra: "They say what doesn't kill you makes you aware, what happens if it becomes who you are?" You may be a victim of what doesn't kill you, but if it becomes who you are, that's not their fault. It reminds me a bit of the exhaustion of living with mental illness. For me in particular, it affects my relationships in a very fundamental way, and there are days that I sob because I am exhausted of things that are so normal being so, so difficult for me... but even though I didn't ask for it and it's not fair that this happened to me, it's still my responsibility to understand how my issues affect how I show up in relationships. It's still my problem, even though it isn't my fault that it's my problem. And if you're lucky, you find really beautiful people who are willing to help you and see that it's not their responsibility, but they want to make it easier for you—I recognize how lucky I am to have some people like that, but it never makes it anyone else's problem. If they decide one day it's not their problem, the truth is that it isn't (and then there's a more complex conversation about what you want to do to preserve a relationship). This is also very connected to something about Kate Beckett/why I identify with that character, and I can touch on that if anyone wants to know, but I don't really have cohesive thoughts about that prepared (it makes more sense if you already know the character). This also goes to other things, like her being upset that people always focus on who songs are about while ignoring the part she played in feeding that culture (like with secret messages).
mental health: this goes to a bigger discussion of how we turn to celebrities who are HIGHLY unqualified to have opinions on things for guidance (the nuance of the above discussion about using your platform), but the more she ventures into the discussion of mental illness, the more upset I get by some remarks she has made in the past. And yes, people grow, she may not feel this way anymore, but nothing in her behavior gives me any reason to believe that she doesn't still have this attitude. This is one that I know I have to be careful of because of how personal it is for me (I've been placed on a 5150 "danger to self" hold and I am a therapist), but one interview that has always made me so upset is that one where she talks about how she's never been to therapy, then ends it by saying "I feel like we just had a therapy session." She has said multiple times how she has never wanted to go to therapy when she has her mom, who already knows everything about her. And that is highly irritating to me because 1. that's why she's your MOM, not your THERAPIST, and 2. there's already so much stigma and apprehension around therapy and many people feel this way, so to have someone like Taylor Swift validate all the people who say "I'd rather talk to someone who already knows me" or "so and so is my therapist" is unbelievably frustrating. There's a reason it's unethical to treat people you know—that isn't therapy. And I think I wouldn't be so bothered by it if she didn't speak about it with such authority, like she knows what she's talking about when what she's saying shows that she doesn't (edit: this is specifically in regard to therapy, not mental illness. I am highly aware that anyone can be mentally ill). The other thing about this album is that it does seem to be an album about loving people with mental illness, and I've already seen a lot of interpretations that simply feed the narrative that people with mental illness are unlovable and mental illness is the reason people mistreat you (particularly the discussion about her lovers being blue all the time). And the issue with that is it's already a common misconception among people with mental illness, that their mental illness is an excuse or reason why they don't treat people right. It's disrespectful to the people who recognize that they have a mental illness that affects how they interact with others and choose to try to overcome it. I'm all for honest discussions about mental illness, but it's so disheartening when it happens on such a large scale and some of the loudest voices are people who don't know enough to know how to (at least try to) do no harm.
fame: I'm not really going to go into it because this has already turned out way longer than I meant for it to, but also because I feel like it's already been touched on. For me, it's the conversation about her feeling she should be able to just do what she wants. I think we all feel that way, but because of her fame and the fact that she's just about untouchable (as shown in how she came back from being cancelled), she can just tune everyone out. But one example was how uneasy I felt about this album being announced at the grammys. For one thing, it's not a fan-voted award, so even if it should, it doesn't feel the same. And regardless of your take on award shows, I do think it showed a level of insensitivity to the other artists who haven't won a bunch of grammys to decide that she would announce a new album at the grammys. Because even if she had a backup plan and said she didn't plan on it, the truth is that, to decide to have a backup plan, you did have to count on it happening, at least to an extent. You had to feel it was likely enough that you wanted to have a back up plan just in case, but it probably would go the way you wanted. To me, it just felt so... disrespectful. Because for many other artists, it doesn't happen more than once. (not to mention the many other things happening that got completely overshadowed, like Annie Lennox calling for a ceasefire)
So if you read all that... I don't even know what the point is at this point. These are just thoughts that, to me, don't feel right to simply ignore. I know there's an argument that you can enjoy music without enjoying where it came from, and it's true to an extent, but I also think part of the music is where it comes from. So... I don't know. Do with that what you will. And if you are reading this, I love you (I can't believe you're reading this).
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fallenhero-rebirth · 1 year
Text
Got asked for some writing advice
How did you improve your writing specifically beyond 'just writing more'?
The first thing is to read different things from different genres. Read an old book, and see how that is written. Read a genre you normally don't read. Read some poetry. Go to the library and walk to a random book, open it in the middle and read. Read on paper, and out loud. And then read some more. And when you read, try to think about why you don't like or likes something. Is it boring? Why? Is it hard to understand? Why? What is it in the words you like? Does it feel good to read out loud? If it doesn't, why not?
A tip is to take a book you think is interesting. Take a paragraph from the middle at random, and write it down in a word document. Pay attention to how it feels to write. How are the sentences? Do they feel different from your own? Close the book and continue to write a few paragraphs. Does your style change? What is the difference between your paragraphs and the one above? Sentence length? Comma use? Does it make it better or worse
Another tip is to write down a bit of dialogue from a tv show or movie you like. There might be transcripts online even. Take that dialogue and write a scene with it. Especially if you find dialogue hard to sound natural this might be freeing. Or, you might even find that what sounded good on the screen looks terrible on paper when it's not said by a charismatic actor.
A third is to write fanfiction and try to make it as good as you can. Try to make it real, as if it might have been from the original source. Think about what it was you liked about it, and then try to imitate that and make your own story. Fanfiction gets a bad rep, but it is a great way to experiment with writing without having to come up with characters and a world. That way you can just focus on the language.
Would you have any tips regarding writing interesting characters? Mine are always very flat and bland OR 'mary sues'
First of all, there is nothing wrong with a "mary sue". The way this is used these days, it might as well mean "protagonist". If Batman or James Bond can get away with their shit, your protagonist certainly can too. And your characters will be flat at the start because a story consists of so many parts. You have your language, your plot, your world, your story rhythm. And when you are starting out, there's simply too many things to focus on. You won't get depth in all of them, and the characters are what you spot being flat first, because that's usually what attracts us to a story in the first place.
My characters were terribly flat when I started out, but I wrote short story horror so it didn't matter. Nobody read that for the characters.
A trick I have to try to get my characters to feel alive is to write arguments. Take two characters you have trouble with and let them talk. Argue about something. Be stuck in an awkward situation together. Don't bother writing anything but dialogue, never mind the actual scene. Just write them talking, and after a while you might get a feel for how they feel different from one another. Maybe they start talking about things about them that you didn't even know. Explore. Have fun. Have them say something weird. Something hurtful. Write reactions. Don't bother thinking if it's usable or not. I've written pages of dialogue just to get a feel for how people talk.
I usually build characters by combining archetypes. I start with one people will know immediately, then add another, and a third. They will be uncovered one at a time, adding depth. Let's take Ricardo Ortega for example. The first archetype is "the sexy leading man/hero". Then, we get to know what I fondly call "the himbo". And finally, we discover "the clever, sneaky asshole". I didn't need to bring in all those things at once, as long as I got writing the first archetype, people would be interested and intrigued when they learned about the new facets.
Would you have any tips on writing humor/banter? You're pretty dang good at it but I could never figure out how to be funny lmao all the jokes I write are Extremely Cringe.
Oh I wish. I honestly have no idea. I was terrible writing characters and dialogue. I think something clicked when I wrote massive amounts of DA2 fanfic, because that was a game which consisted of nothing but banter, so I tried to mimic it the best I could. I have never liked comedies or really understood humor, so I never try to be funny. It's the one part of my writing I truly does not understand, some of my characters are just like that.
What's your plot planning process like, if you have a consistent one? I can only figure out the very generic broad strokes but it falls apart as soon as I try to come up with details.
All plots are generic broad strokes. Rebirth is basically just emo protagonist monologues a lot, meets up with some old friends and proceeds to beat them up. That's it. All plots will look flat and boring in your head, because what makes a plot cool and interesting is that you don't know what's going to happen. You do. You're the author. So of course it will look flat and uninteresting in your head. The hardest thing is trying to ignore this.
My workaround to this is only knowing the barest of broad strokes. I know where I want to go, who the opposition is, some basic scenes that needs to be there (not in detail) and then I write and discover things as I go along. That is the only way for me to remain interested in the plot, if I had planned it in detail I'd get bored. And oh, sure, there's a lot of foreshadowing and hidden things in my writing, but that's only because I know some big things that's going to happen. It's not like I have sat down and detail planned every chapter, what things I need to plant there, and so on. A lot of the times I forget things, and have to go back and add them, and so on. I would say focus on the characters before the plot. If you manage to figure out how to write fun characters first, nobody will care if the plot is bland.
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brigdh · 6 months
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I was thinking more about how Stede doesn't really have an arc this season (see my previous criticism here), and I've decided that what I would have loved to see was Stede actively attempting to court Ed.
Now, we did get a little of this in the first few episodes: Stede's letters in 2x01 are great, I love his attempting to track Ed down via a crime-map in 2x02, and of course the "I'll never leave you. I'll never leave again" speech at the end of 2x03 is fantastic. But once Stede and Ed are both in the same location and conscious, there's really nothing. Stede just hangs around, waiting for Ed to figure himself out, or take the lead, or something, I don't know, but Stede's certainly doesn't take any action to progress their relationship himself. He's such a static character in the second half of S2.
But! Imagine instead the arc where Stede is actively trying to romance Ed! I don't need him to be good at it; it's probably a better character arc if he isn't, in fact. Maybe he comes on way too strong at first and this is why Ed asks him to slow down, until Ed can figure out what he's doing about his own guilt/violence/identity/daddy issues (maybe Ed can actually figure out something about his guilt/violence/identity/daddy issues). Maybe Stede's entire conception of romance comes from poetry and novels and it hits a hard skid when he tries it out in reality. Maybe there are cultural clashes between how pirates approach one another and how the landed upper class does it. The exact way Stede fails doesn't really matter, because the point is that Stede is trying something, and fucking it up, and trying again, and growing as he does so, learning more about what the relationship between him and Ed needs and who they are as people.
This also could have been a really interesting arc for Stede internally. Throw in a couple of flashbacks to Stede courting Mary, to make a parallel between how he acted then and how he's acting now with Ed. If it's beyond the budget to fly Claudia O'Doherty to New Zealand or she's busy or something, give Stede a random other lady or two he approached as a young man – ones who obviously refused to accept his hand. Excellent! Now there's even more weight to him getting it right this time with Ed, when he's never managed to get someone to like him before! Or give young Stede an intense friendship with another young man that went wrong, and back then he didn't understand, but now he can look back and be like, 'oh I guess that wasn't as platonic as I thought'. (Personally, this would be my favorite option, but I know Jenkins & co said they didn't want to write a coming-out story, so maybe they'd have been less interested in this one. Fine, but I want it! 🥳 ) I think you could do this without taking up a lot of screentime – I doubt all the scenes we got of Ed's childhood add up to five minutes in total, but we got plenty of information from those three glimpses.
It would also make sense for Stede to discuss the issue with the crew, which gives the show a chance to flesh out their role a little more, another thing the season could have used. If he asks Lucius, what Lucius responds and how he reacts could help to develop the Lucius/Pete relationship. Similarly, if Stede turned to Olu or Jim, we could have heard more about Jim/Archie or Olu/Zheng or any combination of the four. Or any of the crew! What kind of relationship advice does Frenchie give? Roach? This also could have intersected with Ed's redemption arc nicely: which are the crew are willing to put aside their anger at Ed to help Stede (and them doing so would give more credence to Izzy's speech about them being family and loving Ed at the end)? Who isn't willing, and tries to deliberately sabotage their relationship for revenge, and how do Stede and/or Ed react to that?
Overall, I think such an arc could have fit the show's themes of masculinity and toxicity really well. There's so much about dating and pick-up lines and romance that reflects on gender – there are expectations of who should be aggressive vs receptive, flowery vs crude, prudish vs too fast, gifts as a sign of love vs gifts as obligation... it's endless. Obviously the season wouldn't have time to explore all these angles, but I list them as a sign of how many directions they could have taken this topic in. Ultimately it all comes down to: Who does Stede want to be as a partner? And who does Ed want him to be? And that would be so strong as a direction to go in, even if we didn't get final answers to the questions! At least they would be asking them.
But instead we got a vision of a mermaid and never explored who Stede is in reality. :(
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desceros · 5 months
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pls, wise one, when you have time, share with your children how you structure and word your writing so, so beautifully! cause you have me in a choke hold and my soul hooked to a chain with all your writings! especially your Tea fic :) I strive to become as good as you <3
oh man. this is a tough one. i kinda, uh. just do it at this point without really thinking?? so hold my hand and maybe we can figure it out together LMAO i'll use an example blurb and try and break it down as coherently as i can.
so first you want to have a pretty clear picture of what you want to convey to your reader. the more defined it is in your head, the more easily you can communicate things to your readers. eventually you'll get a feel for how much detail to go into as you describe it. you really don't need to describe the placement of every limb at every moment... but also, the placement of a hand can tell you so much about what's going on in a character's mind, so it's good to know where it is. there's a fine line between purple prose and effective set dressing.
i was just whining about not writing enough soft donnie so let's do that. he's on the couch staring at you. let's write that really quickly:
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notice i don't talk about his entire body placement, but the looseness of his limbs is important. it gives a picture of his mental state without overwhelming you with too much detail.
next: i like to start with big, grand statements, then slowly pluck them apart into the minutia. things like. he looks comfortable. ok; what does that look like? what shape does he take in your head? for me, it's that he's reclining. propping himself up casually. i emphasize the 'soft. relaxed.' by having them be their own short sentences.
on that note, mixing your sentence length is very important and guides the flow of things. longer sentences are like water, bringing your reader down the river you've crafted for them. short sentences have a lot of power, because they're a lot more percussive. you want to use them sparingly so you don't overuse that and retain that feel. mix where you put your independent and dependent phrases, but also know when to mirror yourself. parallel structure can invite your reader to compare ideas or generate momentum. for example, continuing this blurb a bit:
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every sentence begins the same, going from long to medium to short in a way that makes the flow of the paragraph feel a bit like a snowball rolling down a hill, like your thoughts are rushing, so that by the end you can land on a thought that's monumental and feels a little breathless. this is possible because of the parallel structure of the sentences ("like ____. like ____. like _____.") pushing the reader forward. you can of course do it in the opposite direction as well, for when you want to slow a reader down and force them to linger in a moment.
word choice is very important. i'm pretty particular about the words i use for certain things, and i really love using similes and metaphors to create abstract imagery that catches the light more than a flat statement. but it's also important to know when to use those flat statements for a high-impact statement. let's try:
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this kind of falls into my philosophy on the whole 'show don't tell' thing. i'm obsessed with showing. but sometimes, it's more impactful if you tell. like... here you have a very evocative description of him. it includes little things like a reference to a red string of fate (showing it's a romantic moment for you, not platonic), wanting to keep the image in your head permanently, pretty words that mirror what your POV character feels. at the end, you can land on just. he's beautiful. because really that's all that needs to be said, right? but it feels more weighty a thing to say after what came before.
one of the best things i ever did for my prose writing was study poetry. that gave me an appreciation for the weight of a word, and how to use it effectively. the right word or phrase can really change a sentence both melodically and emotionally.
consider the difference between these:
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does he want something? or does he covet it? is he unable to look away from your smile? or is he ensorcelled?
a writer's vernacular is an incredibly powerful tool, so i recommend highly that you expand your vocabulary. make sure to focus on not just the explicit definitions, but also the implicit. some words are largely interchangeable (a touch that slides vs one that glides), but some very much are not even though at first glance they seem they should (a haunting kiss vs a lingering kiss).
anyway i hope that helped a little! this kind of minutia-crafting is like, a passion of mine so i probably went way overboard OOPS but hey if it helps even a little i WIN
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dangerously-human · 2 months
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In the latest way I am perhaps slightly Not Normal about my current special interest (but like, I think in a quite healthy way): realized today I'll be celebrating 13 years clean from cutting in five weeks, which is, dude, wild. This happens to coincide with Lockwood & Co Appreciation Week, and as a treat for me, I'm thinking of ways to perhaps weave the two celebrations together. After all, this is the story I wish I'd heard then, although I'm glad it found its way to me now, too: I can't think of themes that I needed more as a desperately depressed teenager than the triumph of hope over despair, light over darkness, meaning over emptiness, life over death. A story where the siren song of the grave is loud, yet love (of many kinds) is ultimately louder. A story where the grief is made tangible and the hauntings are real, where evil has a face, where it all matters, where it's heavy and still, you don't have to do it alone. The theme that day may or may not work well for self-reflective intent, but maybe - it's "favorite underrated moment," and though a lot of my favorite ones relevant to this topic are common favorites, I do love picking at the thematic threads that are easy to overlook, too.
Maybe I won't write anything specific for it, just spend the time pondering, idk. Some years it doesn't feel like much of an occasion to mark, but I hold to it anyway because it's an opportunity to thank God and give him the glory for carrying me through another year safe, like the way the Israelites were instructed to set up a monument of stones after crossing the Jordan River to remind them and future generations of what God did for them. Some years it feels bigger; this is one of them. I've found myself drifting into old temptations, and sticking to my commitment - while still easier than it was when I first quit - feels a little more like a victory this time around. So it might be nice to mark that somehow, and pouring gratitude and reflection into something I love, something that means a lot to me for similar reasons, just seems fitting.
Or maybe. Maybe. I'll finally get a poem out of this; it's been so long. That would be fitting, too; I used to pour out so much of the self-harm experience into poetry, and it would be rather full-circle to address the healing in that format too. Food for thought.
Anyway! 13 years! Wild.
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