#like both aro and ace spec BOTH

[m1zumono]

100% fr think dean was aspec

#like both aro and ace spec BOTH #i have reasons #spn #supernatural #dean winchester

[glitterghost]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like there is a particular kind of sadness (or loneliness, if you will) that ace/aro folk feel.

#asexual #asexuality #aspec #aromantic #aro #arospec #lgbtqia #am I wrong or no? #its like a sorrow on a frequency only other ace folk can detect #or say ah ha yes i feel this #this makes sense #i can incoherently ramble a feeling or a thought and others who identifying *get* it like it's a language we both speak #fluent in a common wave of ace-solation if you will #anyway just wanting to throw this out there again #i know i had a vague post similar to this that blew up but its always so hard to articulate the feeling #and maybe this will reach others that relate and agree to this that will make them feel less alone #wow these tags are messy and full of typos #lots of love to my loney ace and aro specs buddies #💜💚💜💚💜

[ambrosiagourmet]

Like literally how have I never thought about this from an aro lens:

If that's not the most aro/ace spectrum mood?? "Yeah idk something about traditional romance/sexuality expectations doesn't make sense for me, but maybe I should just follow along with someone else's feelings because it might be for the best. But also I feel guilty doing that because I cannot reciprocate those feelings and might hurt them."

Also her potentially trying to navigate her feelings towards Marcille while knowing they both don't fit entirely in the [heteronormative] or [romantic] boxes???

TWO WHOLE ARO TOUDEN SIBLINGS???

#this is all like very just Vibes and Thoughts I don't have hard opinons on either Falin or Laios #but I do like the aro/ace spec vibes for Laios #and I feel like a FOOL for never thinking about Falin also having those vibes #them both being in arranged engagements from childhood....

[idmnbc]

After seeing that many people only rescue the asexual and not the aromantic in Isaac, I hope that in the next season we can see moments where his aromanticism is more emphasized. The word was only mentioned once, while 'asexual' did come up at different times, like when Isaac grabs Angela Chen's book, which was amazing and beautiful. But we need the aromantic joy to be exposed and shouted from the four winds <2

#I trust in Alice #bcs many aro spec people start their journey first in the ace area #my aroace journey #isaac henderson #isaac heartstopper #aroace #aro #ace #heartstopper #osemanverse #I know this is a hugeeeee step bcs its the first time i watch in a comercial media product pronouncing the word ARO and that is pure gold #maybe MAYBEEEE the story arc in this is that Isaac will read abt aromanticism in the book #so he will start to research and find that there's little to none representation #maybe he will buy common bonds #idk idk idk aaaa #+ this a personal opinion #but I enjoy more my aro side that my ace side #dont get me wrong I like both but the freedom and enjoyment that I am discovering since I know that I am ARO is unmatched

[solreefs]

Shoutout to nd arospec people whose neurodivergence affects their romantic orientation, you’re awesome.

#my autism and my aromanticism both heavily influence how i see the world #my experiences with being aromantic are almost completely inseparable from my experiences with being autistic #my being aro is tied to my being autistic. there’s no way around it #also special shoutout to people who are aro spec because of trauma! #i feel like the aspec community (ace and aro) tends to push a narrative of “it’s not trauma it’s who i am” #but trauma changes how you see the world! including how you perceive your romantic orientation #so yeah. your aromanticism isn’t any less valid if you don’t fit the idea of being “born this way” #nd aros are cool send post #aro #aromantic #adrastea’s aspec adventures #Adra rambles

[oodlesofowls]

Inktober day 25: tempting

Projecting my ace headcanons onto yet another character

also BONUS :D

He’s secretly just a lil guy and I love him :)

#inktober #inktober 2022 #akaashi keiji #hq fanart #hq #asexual #asexual headcanons #asexual akaashi #ace akaashi #also he ​is def aro spec #so is bokuto #they’re both aroace because I’m aroace #I love the idea of them in a qpr #Akaashis favorite cake is raspberry n chocolate #idk it just suits him #also bokuto doesn’t like cake because I’m not a fan either #also bc he already has cake- #oodlesofowls #my art

[lokiiied]

equal respect for the “hitting them (this character/relationship) with the gay as fuck beam”ers AND for the “hitting them with the aro/ace beam”ers !!!

#and i am both #queer #aroace #aroace spec #big difference between hets saying something isn’t *queer* bc they’re homophobic #and aro/ace specs saying something isn’t *romantic/sexual* bc not everything is or has to be #and sometimes it’s both!! #like queerplatonic #mlm #wlw #bi4bi #aromantic #asexual

[miakwat]

Constantly jumping between the Lesbian and purely Aroace identities

#like im almost completely sure I’m both aro spec and ace #and today’s just one of those days where I’m like mmmm woman 😩❤️💞💗

[aroacesafeplaceforall]

Yes I’m aegosexual/aromantic, yes I write shipping fics and yes I read smut. I can enjoy shit without it always being aro/ace oriented but I would still like some ducking representation pls

Just because I consume and create non-aro/ace spec content, does not mean I don’t also create and consume aro/ace spec content.

Stop using the “but I know an ace/aro who likes (insert ship) so they don’t care about representation” (this can go both ways, either an allo or a different aspec person) as an excuse

We can enjoy more then just our identities but we would also like to see our identities more! Thank you

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #aro #ace #aro pride #ace pride #pride #lgbtqia #representation #aegosexual

[tobi-smp]

it’s occurred to me that some things that were relatively common-knowledge in queer spaces have become less well known as the years have gone on (incidentally or otherwise).

there’s quite a few identities/labels that I’d say this has happened to, but tackling all of them in one go would be a very long post I suspect. so! for anyone who is unfamiliar with or doesn’t (in good faith) understand “demisexuality” / ”demiromanticism” here’s a brief but comprehensive rundown!

most people are familiar with asexuality/aromanticism (which is a lack of sexual/romantic attraction) and most of those people are familiar with the concept that asexuality/aromanticism is a spectrum (which is to say that people under the asexual/aromantic labels can experience their attraction differently, the same way that bi/pan/mspec people have varying experiences with their attraction. often shortened to “ace-spec” “aro-spec” individually or “a-spec” to cover both).

but what people Aren’t as familiar with are the specific labels that describe certain experiences within the a-spectrum. one of the more popular of which is demisexuality/demiromanicism.

people who fall under the demi label only feel attraction to people that they feel a deep emotional connection to. if that attraction is sexual then the label is demisexual, if that attraction is romantic then the label is demiromantic, if the attraction is both then someone may choose to use both or simply “demi.” 

this is often misunderstood on the surface level because of the conflation of “attraction” with actively pursuing a partner, which is an understandable mistake but shouldn’t be used to kneejerk reject the label or the people who use it.

attraction is any feeling that you get in response to a person, not just the feelings that you act on. feeling attraction to a character in media, to an actor, to a model, to adult media, that’s all filed under sexual and romantic attraction without necessarily needing a deep emotional connection to preempt those feelings.

a demi person may, of course, appreciate a person or character aesthetically (know that they’re pretty or handsome), but they Won’t experience that attraction unless they otherwise have that deep personal connection.

and in the same way, a demi person would have a much more difficult time trying to date through, say, dating apps or hookups. going into a relationship with the idea of attraction first could be unnatural in a way that it may not be for someone who isn’t demi.

and so a demi person will share similar experiences with ace and aro people, not being able to relate to media or school crushes like the people around them are (a fact that those people often pick up on). they do often (though not always) seek out relationships with people that they Do feel that intimate connection with, though often at a slower pace than their peers.

not everyone who shares this experience will use these labels (all labels are a personal choice after all), but for some people it is a significant aspect of their sexuality and one that they want to put a name to. whether someone wants to use this term specifically, a-spec, or both is, again, up to personal preference!

#discourse #demisexual #demiromantic #I may make more of these if anybody's interested

[general-yasur]

for once there is a Kai rotating in my head and the result is a sizzling hot take That being: Kai gives me more aroace vibes than Lloyd. There's something about Kai "liking" skylor and then not only never getting her number but it is implied he ghosted her LOL. He acts like a player but also has no game. It reminds me of when I was in elementary school and would pick a boy to "like" because I thought that's just how it works. So he does it to fit in to make up for basically not having a normal childhood. Essentially trying to act what he imagines a teenager is supposed to be like And While I have headcanoned Lloyd as aroace spec, the more I think about it the more I realize he has shown more romantic interest in someone than like half of the ninja lol. Look at it how you want but the oni trilogy is pretty loud that Lloyd has a crush at least and it sorely affected him I see it as Lloyd had the textbook definition allo people have told me when I ask what a crush is like lmaoo and simultaneously something I can't relate to as someone who is aroace myself

If you compare Kai's romantic situation with Lloyd and even Zane, they both have shown more romantic interest in a character than he has. which is ironic because Kai is the playboy and Lloyd n Zane are the aroace characters in fanon, despite canon This kinda fuels my opinion that the fanon view of Lloyd and Zane being aro ace specifically is based on stereotypes of aromantic and asexual people rather than taking a dive at how the characters behave in the show. That is a whole other conversation tho lol

#about to do a shuffle on my ninjago headcanons #maybe #i am attached to demisexual zane and gray-aro lloyd but who knows i can do whatever #totally incorporating aroace kai in some capacity into my belief system tho #unknownsigils was talking to me about aromantic jaya and let me tell you i was seated #also #this is just my opinion/observation about the characters and the fandom based on my own experiences in it and as an aroace person #ninjago #lloyd garmadon #lloyd ninjago #ninjago lloyd #ninjago zane #zane julien #kai ninjago #kai jiang #ninjago kai

[antimony-medusa]

This is verging on discourse, but I have to say, as someone aroace with the emphasis on the aro, it's a trifle disheartening to ever try to look for queerplatonic relationships that look like mine within this fandom. QPRs can cover a broad spectrum of experiences, and it always seems that within MCYT what a QPR looks like has calcified into this one depiction that is very close (but not actually crossing the line) to shipping, just without kissing or sex! With emotional connections that are very similar (but not quite) to romance, hitting many of the same beats. And that just doesn't reflect my experience at all. Personally, I have more fun reading about straight ahead romance than a qpr that hits almost all the same notes, but just doesn't quite go there, that never digs into an aro or ace experience that I recognize, and that is always what I seem to find when I go cruising the tags.

For one thing, QPRs are not just an ace thing, and they definitely don't have to be a sexless thing! You can be aroallo and in a QPR and have sex, or you can be ace and in a QPR and have sex for the sake of your partner, or just for fun! Sex is fun for a lot of ace people, including those in QPRs, and using QPR eternally to mean "sexless" cuts off a large swath of the population that DOES have sex, for whatever reason. And there are tons of ace people who are extremely fine with kissing, including people who are sex adverse, so using a QPR are a shorthand to mean "sexless and also kissless" is only depicting a very narrow slice of the experience.

And QPRs in practice often look very different from romance, including with people who are romance-adverse, and who don't want any of the trappings that normally come with romance (marriage, specific terms like "love" or "darling", metaphors or positioning like "half of my heart" or "soulmate"), and I just never get to see that. A QPR can be two people who sleep in seperate rooms co-parenting a kid! (Or more than two people!) A QPR can be people married together and sharing a bed and holding hands at the movies and calling each other "darling", or it can be people who signed legal paperwork together who call each other "bro", and those are BOTH valid QPRs. But I only ever get to see the one that looks so close to romance that it's alienating to me, while people tell me that I should be happy to be depicted. (I'm not depicted.)

And I'm also frustrated because I have read QPRs that are sharing all the same hallmarks-of-romance-but-no-sex that I would theoretically have a problem with, but they also ring as true to me because people actually talk about what the relationship is and isn't to them, and I go Yes! Not me but I am on a similar wavelength! But so many people just go "QPR" but never unpack the actual ace/aro/aroace experience, so again I'm left with something that is using all the romance and affection tropes that I've come to expect over decades of living in an amonormative society, just slapping a "but it's platonic" on it at the very end. Where's people making assumptions about your relationship that you have to consider whether to correct or not? Where's the inside jokes? Where's the intimacy negotiations and teasing each other about what you want in terms of touch+? Where's the doing life together in a non-romantic way? Where's the epic friendship? Where's the aro experience? (If we're mutuals, you probably write all of these things, and I'm not complaining about you, you're good.)

And it's hard to escape the feeling that at least some of these people are writing QPR because they're afraid of shipping, as I see the tags scroll endlessly by, not because they actually want to depict the a-spec experience.

Some of it is just people not used to writing affection outside of the romance tropes in our society, and some of it is that so many guestures of affection in our society get romance-coded when like, holding hands is not inherently romantic, I know. But sometimes, man, I want to tell people that it's okay to romantically ship, they don't have to keep it platonic, if they're going to write something that is so similar to shipping but has a giant "don't worry, these guys don't fuck" stamped on it.

I don't know, maybe there are even less people like me than I thought. Or maybe the people like me aren't writing fanfiction (lol).

I don't know. QPRs are more varied than they get depicted, and the a-spec experience is special to me and I wish it got written in its diversity. It's frustrating to see only ever one type of QPR, one that is exclusionary to me. I wish I could see the tag and not know exactly what that relationship looked like, or saw something that I felt was strongly influenced by what the characters are, instead of the same sort of sexless romance-lite every time.

#discourse #fandom meta

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Sword gays showdown, round 2 of bracket one

Propaganda:

For Zoro:

Literally training to be the greatest swordsman in the world. Has a special three swords technique (one blade in each hand plus one with the handle held in his teeth). I haven't read the manga or watched the anime but the live action adaptation gives me extremely gay vibes and based on the fandom things I've seen I'm not the only one

bro uses three swords. has one in his mouth. dont ask how the HELL he manages that. one day he will be the worlds greatest swordsman....after he beats the current greatest for both the titles of greatest swordsman and fruitiest swordsman. he's dramatic as FUUUCK like bro what the hell. has homoerotic fights with the local twink like everyday. directionally challenged, can and will get lost in a paper bag, doesnt know left from right...he probably cant read, too. hes too silly ngl

First of all, im in like episode 250 and so far he hasnt been shown attracted to any woman at all during the whole show so far, not even when one changed clothes in the same room as him and this is anime so you know there were other characters with bloody noses and shit. With that out of the way he wields three swords at once [two in his hands, one is his goddamn mouth dude. Its cool af trust me.] When he was little he made a promise to his best friend that he'd be the best swordsman in the world. Later she died in a tragic accident and left her sword which he still uses today. He also carries a cursed sword but he overpowers the curse with a combination of skill and sheer luck. He got stuck in a chimney. While his crewmates sail their ship he takes naps. He learned how to cut through metal by fighting a guy who could turn his body into metal blades. That's metal. He refuses to fight this liberal marine officer because she looks like his childhood best friend and its just understandably really awkward for him. He's autistic. He's a he/him bisexual lesbian. He's a gay man. He's ace/aro. He's whatever you want him to be babey!!

he has 3 swords, wields one in his mouth sometimes, his dream is to be the greatest swordsman in the world

three swords and big aroace-spec gay vibes

He not only has a sword he has *three* swords. He's absolutely gay there's no way to see this man as straight. Also one time he licked his sword for no reason and that was really funny to me so I had to mention it

Look, this man thinks about three things: Swords, His Captain, and Booze. He’s on a quest to be the worlds greatest swordsman. The Live action has a scene where he declares his undying, unwavering loyalty to his captain WHILE reaffirming his promise to be the worlds greatest swordsman. At this point His dream and his Captain are so intertwined it’s crazy. Man is so sword-y he’s got three of them. When one of his swords broke he carried its empty scabbard until he was able to give it a SWORD FUNERAL. He hears a sword is cursed and takes that as a challenge. He will literally tell his swords off for “bad behavior” when they “act up” due to being straight up cursed. He tests one by throwing it in the air and sticking his arm out to see if it is so blood thirsty and ill tempered that it will cut him. Even though he’s literally the first mate if you ask him what his role is he’s going to answer Swordsman.

He's dedicated his life to two things: becoming the greatest swordsman in the world and his captain, Luffy. 

He mastered the three sword style. Its his style. It would've been more swords but he could only fit one sword in each hand and one in his mouth. He wants to be the world's greatest swordsman, a deal he made with his childhood best frenemy (before she died falling down the stairs). He thought he was All That at the start and was almost completely decimated by the actual Worlds Greatest Swordsman. Now, after two years forced training with that guy, he's probably in the top tier no-doubt, and honestly could already be the best but we just don't know for sure yet. Also, did I mention: he's got the whole demon/devil imagery going on at times. And he has absolutely no sense of direction! plus is a total softie when it comes to Chopper and all the children who somehow gravitate towards him. And he loves naps!

One of the guy's main goals in life is to be the best sword fighter and he fights with three swords which I think is telling enough of his skill.

For Sayaka Miki:

my favourite scene is the one where Sayaka turns off all her pain receptors to battle the shadow witch, uncaring of the damage dealt to her body, because what is a body but a decaying vessel you must eventually abandon anyway? that was very depression of her <3 Also there’s that one time (in the rebellion movie) where Sayaka stabs herself on her own sword to release the witch that dwells within her. and then she immediately gets up to fight back to back with her girlfriend. that moment lives rent free in my head. Sayaka is so depression and I love her for it:)

SHES SO GAY ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY SHE FLIRTS W THE MAIN CHARACTER HER NARRATIVE FOIL IS ANOTHER GIRL W TBE OPPOSITE COLOR SCHEME THEYRE RED BLUE LESBIAN MOMENT YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT ELSE ??? SHE COMES TO THIS FALSE REALITY LITERALLY JUST TO SEE HER GIRLFRIEND ALIVE THEY LIVE TOGETHER AND THERES A WHOLE OUTRO SEQUENCE JUST W THE TWO OF THEM SHE STUDIED THE GAY BLADE I STG also she uses a sword 🗡️ love u sayaka

#sword gays showdown #roronoa zoro #sayaka miki #pmmm sayaka #pmmm #one piece #madoka magica #one piece zoro #puella magi madoka magica

[green-enby]

Heyo! Have you watched Koisenu Futari (恋せぬふたり, Two people who can't fall in love) yet? It's a great series, just 8 episodes long! I binged it in one day :) [smiley]

It focuses on two aromantic asexual people living together. This is a little appreciation post, containing some thoughts that it evoked in me as an aroace.

If you don't want spoilers, please don't read!

It's so relatable how Sakuko keeps blaming herself all throughout the show… Insecurity stemming from societal expectations that dictate romance is for everyone, and that people who don't date are somehow "failing" in life; I think this affects allos as well.

When I broke off my romantic relationship, I too felt like it had been my fault, for not having been a good enough partner, for not being able to love them in the same way they loved me.

To finally learn that you are not "defective", that there's other people like you…! I love how the two MCs don't grieve their lack of attraction; Sakuko is perfectly happy discovering she's aroace. She and Takahashi are living their "best life" together.

Sure, many aroaces do wish they were allo, and that needs to be represented too, but this series to me really shined a light over why they want that: it's because amatonormativity is rampant in the world, not because lacking attraction is inherently sad. The main conflicts in the series stem from the clash between allo society and the aroace experience, after all. I think that's neat! It gave me a good dose of aroace joy—while still showing the hurts that come with it, realistically—and I really needed it.

I didn't expect her to come out to her family so soon, but whoa, that was intense. Her mother's negative reaction is what all people who exclude a-spec people from the LGBTQIA+ community should see, to understand that we face the same issues they do.

I haven't come out to my parents as aroace yet, and watching this made me realize how awful it actually feels to be in the closet. I somehow hadn't realized I am. I've always felt safe coming out to them as other things, as bisexual back in the day, and as trans non-binary.

It might be because my confidence disappeared when they reacted badly both times, but this coming out feels almost impossible.

Comparing it to coming out as bi, it's really not that different: if you're bi, you're promiscuous and date too many people; if you're aroace, you're a prude and cold-hearted. If you break away from the status quo, you're wrong either way.

But at least, most people do eventually understand the bi experience, if they understand same-gender attraction, and fuse it with straightness, even though it's a flawed method.

With aros and aces, instead, it's such an alien concept for an allo, which makes it way harder to come out and have to explain to them how to deconstruct allo-amatonormativity. It's exhausting. Thankfully, there's people like Kazu who are actually willing to learn about us. That gives me hope.

I feel like it's super eye-opening to find out the concept of romance didn't even exist in the past. Pretty sure that in Europe, it originated during the Middle Ages from the ideal of chivalry. So it's really just a social construct, and opting out of it shouldn't be so controversial!

It's just a set of pointless, annoying rules like having to kiss eachother, having to say "I love you", and doing it all a set amount of times, otherwise it's not good enough. What if we don't want to? What if it doesn't come natural to us? If it's just a social construct, fuck it, I'm not adhering to that! We do whatever makes us happy!

Even in the series itself, Sakuko too goes through a heartbreak, even if it's not the romantic kind: she valued her friendship and future cohabitation with Chizuru above all else, but Chizuru abandoned her, because of romantic love. It's not true that aroaces have it easy.

Like our MC, we have to deal with fear that we'll come off flirty when we're just being friendly, confusion over concepts that we feel we should understand, shame over the fact that we're different, fear of loneliness, frustration and pain that we'll always come second to our friends' romantic partners, or even trauma from a relationship or sexual encounter that we didn't really want. I could go on and on.

These last scenes really got to me. Especially the second one… I admit that I cried, when she had to turn her down, and it seemed like her aromanticism had ruined their relationship. It hurts that the way I am could seriously harm someone I care about. It hurts that most people work differently and that they can't help it, and that we can't help it either. I don't like being put in that position, to cause someone a heartbreak. I have with my ex, and had to watch them spiral down… It was horrible.

Still, I wouldn't change my orientation for the world. I'm confident in my identity, I love being aroace.

In the end, we can all reach our full potential, reach a point where we feel fulfilled and that we're living our best life, find ourselves a family if it's what we want, have our dream job and house. Being aroace doesn't condemn us to a life of unhappiness. That's what this series left me with by the end; it gave me so much hope for my future.

(I'm aware I'm coming off as a bit toxically positive here haha, sorry if I'm striking a bad chord; I'm just in a really good period right now, and riding this wave for as long as I can! Hopefully I can rub it off someone else as well.)

That said, I really loved this j-drama, it was funny and relatable and emotional, I wished it had lasted longer! It seems like the author isn't even aroace herself, so I'm amazed at how good the representation was! So much thought and research has gone into it, and it shows; the result is amazing.

Thanks for reading my scattered thoughts about this! 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

#koisenu futari #aroace representation #aroace #aroace characters #aroace positivity #aphobia #amatonormativity #allonormativity #aspec #aspec character #aspec positivity #aromantic #asexual #aromantic asexual #lgbtqia+ #lgbtqia #queer #queer shows #queer representation #spoilers #canon aroace #aroace character #qpr #found family #coming out #jdrama #japanese series #japan #short series #sa mention

[amorisastrum]

Hey hi hello here are some of my headcanons of the poets :3

Todd:

The three A's - Anxious, Autistic and Asexual

It just makes sense in my head that he's asexual idk what to tell you

He knows French. As far as I'm aware this is a widely accepted headcanon.

He knew he was gay from a young age. Or at least that he was different. One time at church they were talking about being queer and how it's a sin and little 10 year old Todd felt so guilty and horrible.

Todd has very bad religious trauma. Like really bad.

He loves cats. So much.

He annotates his books

Neil:

He LOVES flowers

He knows floriography

Literally a nerd

He can dance! Specifically ballroom dancing. He never enjoyed it until he had practiced with Todd. He realised he never had a good enough dance partner.

He keeps literally everything he is given. He keeps it all in a little box.

Broke his arm climbing a tree when he was 7.

His knees are always bruised because he is constantly walking into stuff.

Nuwanda:

He would hide little notes around Welton saying some of the most absurd things ever.

He met Neil in the hospital when Neil fell out of the tree. They instantly became best friends.

For some reason he just has a singular blue crayon on him at all times. He doesn't know why he has it but it's just there on his desk.

One time called Todd "Toddler" to get his attention and Todd actually responded so now he randomly calls Todd "Toddler" and they both find it very funny

He sleep talks and the poets think it's the funniest thing ever

One time he ate a dog biscuit as a dare. It was all he could taste for the rest of the day. He hated it.

Meeks:

He has a stuffed bear called peanut butter

Which is ironic because he is allergic to peanuts

Aro ace :3

He has a little sister. It just feels right.

The tiniest spec of dust on his glasses drives him mad so he's constantly cleaning his glasses

He found one of Charlie's notes and keeps it on his desk

Knox:

Pitts:

He tried writing a book. It was really good. And then he lost it.

He gave up after that

He gets really queasy when he sees blood

Constantly procrastinating.

He loves spiders. Why? I don't know he just thinks they're fun.

He loves baking!!! He made cookies one time during Christmas break and brought them back to Welton and gave them out to everybody :)

Met Meeks' little sister one time and she instantly claimed him as her best friend.

Cameron:

He's weirdly good at drawing.

He doesn't do it often as he wants to focus on his education, but one time he got bored and drew a picture and Charlie was dumbfounded like "you can draw?????"

He's gay. Idk. In my brain Richard Cameron = queer.

His favourite food is pasta

Autistic.

He really enjoys geography.

#dead poets society #dps #neil perry #charlie dalton #todd anderson #steven meeks #gerard pitts #richard cameron #dps headcanons #dps hcs #my hcs #percy rambles #i did this instead of my homework help #i should actually do it

[codywanweek]

How to write aro/ace codywan for the non-aspec

Want to write something for the aro/ace codywan prompt but you're not sure how or you're afraid you'll offend someone? Here's a hopefully useful post to help you out.

Disclaimer:

I, Yellow, am only one aromantic* person and opinions may differ. This post is to be taken as suggestions for possible configurations of codywan being aro- and/or ace-spec. At the end I'll mention some pitfalls to avoid. *formerly used the label ace for 1+ year, so is fairly familiar with pitfalls for acespec characters as well, but again ymmv.

These suggestions are focused on aro/ace people in relationships. The reason for this is that this is still a ship week, but obviously there are also aro/ace people that are not interested in partnering at all.

Suggestions and pitfalls under the cut! If you, an aro/ace-spec person, have suggestions as well, feel free to reblog them on this post, or to DM/send an ask and I'll add them!

Suggestions:

Note: a QPR = queerplatonic relationship is a relationship type that "queers the platonic". There is no defined list of things that need to or shouldn't occur for a relationship to be queerplatonic. In general you could think of it as being platonic lifepartners, but it's not strange for a QPR to be sexual or even romantic as well.

These suggestions are formatted as: Codywan's specific identities and then a (fluffy) idea for their relationship. There are infinitely many options for how relationships work, and you can definitely mix and match between these "flavors". Angst is a bit more difficult to write, but you could look at the pitfalls and use those to go for a self-doubt/acceptance route.

Flavor: Any. You're more than welcome to write a platonic relationship as well!

Flavor: Codywan are both aromantic and asexual and have no interest in romance or sex: QPR Idea: They have such a close bond as commander and general that they feel like they are integral parts of each others lives and continue on like this after the war.

Flavor: They are not aromantic and one or both of them are asexual: romantic relationship/QPR Idea 1; they don't have sex: "basically" write a romantic relationship without sex. Maybe you can write the conversation they have about their expectations in the relationship. Idea 2; they do have sex: ace people can have sex if they want to, maybe they like the closeness of it or that it feels good, but they may not feel a need for having sex.

Flavor: They are not asexual and one or both of them are aromantic: sexual relationship/QPR Option 1; no romance: Maybe they are friends with benefits and do not consider themselves in a committed relationship. Or maybe they are in a QPR and also enjoy having sex together. Option 2; romance: Maybe they are in a romantic relationship and the aro character enjoys the "romantic" aspects just because they are pleasant to do/experience, but they may not feel a need to do these things with their partner. Here are some ideas from another aro person!

Flavor: One or both of them are demiro and/or demi-ace: anything Demi = you only feel romantic or sexual attraction to people you are already close to (does not mean you feel the attraction to everyone you're close to). Idea: Maybe codywan reaches a certain point in the war where they fully trust each other and have gotten close on a personal level and they get an "oh" moment where they suddenly realize they're attracted to the other.

Flavor: One or both of them are grayro and/or gray-ace: anything Gray- = you only feel romantic or sexual attraction very rarely or weakly (below the "average" for allo people to the point that you relate to aro/ace identities) Here you can have the fun "wait this is what you people have been talking about??" when someone has their first crush ever, but in general you can assume suddenly feeling attraction like that is very unexpected and maybe they find it very impractical to be happening right then.

Flavor: Anything! I am not a spokesperson for the whole aspec community and you're more than welcome to do your own research about identities and relationships.

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Pitfalls:

CW for implied ace/arophobia.

Note that these things can be explored when dealing with self-doubt and self-acceptance, but please do not present the things stated below as facts.

When writing aro/ace codywan getting together: do not imply that something has been "fixed" about them.

Do not imply that being a virgin is bad.

When questioned about being aro-/ace-spec, do not make statements such as "but I can still love!!" as this throws people that don't love/are distanced from love under the bus. [see Lovelessness. Originally from the aro community, but valid to use when you're not aro as well]

In that same vein: "love is what makes us human" (or sentient in star wars I suppose) is a no.

Another in that same vein: "But I can still X" statements in general get icky very quickly, as it feels like you need to make up for a lack of something.

Don't portray an ace character as "innocent" or "childish" due to their aceness. Don't portray them as not knowing anything about sex by default unless you have good (relevant) in-story reasons for it. (e.g. Cody doesn't know anything about sex because the clones had no sex-ed and he wasn't interested in learning anyway, or Cody/Obi-Wan knows the anatomical basics but nothing further because they were Not interested.)

Addition by @data-plays-viola: Don't portray ace characters as sex negative by default, unless you have good (relevant) in-story reasons for it. Sex negative asexual people exist but the two are not connected (though some may use their asexuality as an excuse, unfortunately.)

If you write an ace character that has sex, do not imply that this is a redeeming quality. Same for an aromantic character that does romantic things.

Note that not all ace people are sex repulsed and not all aro people are romance repulsed, they may also be indifferent or favourable to the idea. (X repulsed is usually being repulsed by the idea of participating in X, though for some it means being repulsed by X in general.) Do not imply that being sex/romance repulsed is the standard for aspec people.

Note 2: some aspec people see a clear event in their past that had an effect on their sexual and romantic orientations (such as trauma), but for most people being aspec is just as random as e.g. being gay or being trans. Do not attach a reason to a character being aro and/or ace without doing your research into people that feel like that.

#codywanweek #codywan week 2024 #aro/ace codywan #writing aro characters #writing ace characters #writing aspec characters