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#modern au again im still trying to cope
bluechanas · 4 months
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rip gideon you would’ve loved that one tshirt
also open for a surprise
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2K notes · View notes
tetrafy · 8 months
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Rant/ Spoilers for Pokémon SV DLC: The Teal Mask!! I’ll also add a Sona drawing of my Legends AU and the Paldea one below! I know the style is different. This is my inconsistent style arc LMAO 🫶
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Just quick description of why I have 2 Sona Designs! So the first one is the one everyone has seen on this account which is the one that Simps for Adaman and gets taken to Hisui. The other, is the Paldea/Present Storyline (and she simps for Perrin). They both have almost the same backstory (with some minor timeline changes) but one progresses like normal in life while the other gets stuck in the past in the end.
I drew my Typhlosion that way because I thought it would be a cool idea for it to evolve in Sinnoh/ The Distortion World as my Sona somewhat takes over the role of Dawn/Lucas for the Platnuim storyline! And since Hisui and Sinnoh are the same and the Dex entry for Hisuian Typhlosion is:
“…I believe its form has been influenced by the energy of the sacred mountain towering at Hisui’s center.”
And would you look at that? The sacred mountain is Mt. coronet
So since Sinnoh is the Hisui region, it could be cool that the distortion world caused the a mutation of its dormant Hisuian genes to influence its Johtoian/modern day evolution.
- In the distortion world, time doesn’t flow properly and or it doesn’t follow the laws of physics so that could also be a cool loop hole. I get that it wouldn’t make sense for a Pokémon to evolve if time doesn’t flow, but in game, an eevee could still evolve into an umbreon or espeon so I’ll take it LMAO
So it can learn Inferno Parade and some Ghost type moves and it’s Tera Type is Ghost, hehe!
Anyways I’m rambling so move on!
Okay, so all of you know that I’m a fan of Legends Arceus so you can tell that I’m just going to mainly gush over the Perrin Storyline. I think that’s pretty much a given but just know its just me giving a play by play and my reactions so this might not be interesting!
Spoilers, officially starts here!
Okay so seeing Perrin for the first time in game, I literally screamed. Like hello?? You can’t blame me like seriously. She’s kinda my way for coping with the lack of Adaman content and Legends Content but she’s also so prettyyyyyy. So when Kieran literally started saying like, “I’ll meet you there” to progress the main story, I ran up to her trying to progress her story first before anything.
God, they did her justice when they translated her from the official art to the game! I wish to see Adaman in SV rendering style gahhh!!
- I do wish they explained why Hisuian Pokémon are around and not extinct, but that might just be like, “some were bred out of existence”, “they’re rare”, or something of the sort. Either way, due to them bringing back Hisuian Pokémon, im sure they’re might be an explanation in the future!
- I do also wish she explained why she had a Hisuian Growlith in the first place, or our player character mentions “what Pokémon is that?” Or something cause I would assume that Hisuian Variants are rare. Then again, it could be a thing that they talked about them in class. After all, Professor Laventon was on screen in Raifort’s Board
- But Perrin having Growlith just could be a hint that Adaman and Irida got together because she does give you her second Growlith at the end of her story. You know, cause one of the Pearl Clan’s nobles being Arcanine and the whole Colbat Coastline story in Arceus.
- It could mean Adaman and Irida got together, Their clans Merged and or disbanded, or it could literally just be a reference that pokemon did and I’m reading too much into it LMAO
Anyways! As someone who doesn’t do the Dex in Pokémon games, you can imagine me when I heard Perrin mention the requirement of 150 Pokémon for the Kitakami dex. I got like weird Legends Deja-vu and started “sobbing” to my friend, @deflatedrock, over the fact that I have to do the Dex for DLC.
- Also got Deja-vu over the fact that she called me “Kiddo” (yes, I was a Sans simp in my early days…)
- As someone who is not a minor I was like “Perrin please!! I’m not a kid!!” But yes, i understand that the protags in these games are all kids HAHA
- I just imagine my Sona (on the right) just trying to say how she’s not a kid with slight annoyance and embarrassment.
But Did I do it? Yes I got 150 Pokémon under 24 hours, what of it? And that was also including the story and the fact that was under leveled at the beginning of it LMAO
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Imagine me screaming when the cutscene of her starts when she challenges me. I love the smile she has and it makes me wish that the switch was a more powerful console! Also Leafeon being her Second pokemon absolutely made me smile and it was super adorable the fact that she was taking pictures of us whenever she battled! Like :((((((((
The story starts after I beat her and she accepts me on taking on the job of helping snap a picture of a hard to find pokemon. I absolutely, am giggling over the “Partner” title I received from her. I was over the moon, on cloud nine LMAO !!
If you saw the direct/played the game, she wants to take a picture of Ursaluna with a unique marking on it’s head and the vague Hisui mentions throughout the story absolutely made me lose my shit. Small bits and pieces that Ursalunas used to be common back in the day or how mentions about her homeland.
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Small mentions of Hisui/ Legends make me think of a high possibility of another Legends game could be in the future.
- I am hoping Johto but I do say it would be reasonable for it to be Unova or Kalos. But main reason I want it to be Johto is due to me never playing BW/BW2 or XY. I do plan to play them but the Grind for Unova is rough since DS game and XY i havent gotten the motivation to buy it and play it on 3DS (i know excuses HAHA)
- But I do hope that every region eventually gets its own Legends remake but with actual effort put into it like how Legends did. Legends with it’s music that is a call back to the Diamond, Pearl and Platinum games and a unique take on a pokemon game with Dex being the main priority rather than battles made it that much enjoyable. I do wish they didn’t put out BDSP and focused more time into Legends rather than releasing both.
- obviously not every region needs it, but I would be cool to live through the war or something that was mentioned in Kalos, or live through the events during the Sprout Tower. (I don’t know anything about Unova but *insert something a Unova fan wants from a Unova Legends game*)
But Im rambling so let us continue!
We make our way to the Timeless Woods, the location where the Ursaluna is often spotted and at the time, I didn’t really think much of it. I just thought, “Oh cute! ‘Timeless’ because this story is Hisui coded with Perrin and Ursaluna!”
But love the cute interaction moments:
- Whenever Perrin spoke to the polliwhirl and just calling it a “cutie pie” and speaking to it like anyone would do with their pet. Should’ve been me.
- Her getting embarrassed that the player might’ve tuned in with her pet names to the wild pokemon
- The fact that we saved her from a wild pokemon that came out of nowhere
- The cute camp setup! I will eventually draw her and my Sona sleeping in the tent together as we wait for the fog
- or just any time she would take a photo of us and calling us heroic and such
But before anything Ursaluna related, we must survey the area to see the different species living here. So I go up to her and click “A” to progress the story and we wait for the fog to come in at night…
I didn’t expect much going into it. Literally just thought, Pokémon snap but in SV. Once the survey starts and we officially load in im standing in the woods. The first note plays in the background and I am stunned. My eyes start to well up as the music continues. Heartwoods plays in the background and I had to put down my switch for a moment. I let out an excited squeal as I couldn’t help but just say “oh my god, stop…” with a chuckle. I sat there on my bed just listening to it and letting everything sink in. I couldn’t help but imagine the idea of my Sona possibly getting Deja-vu or her tearing up alongside me.
I stayed in the woods longer than I should have. Taking my sweet time snapping photos of the Pokémon in the area, even though it won’t even matter how good they were as long as the Pokémon were recognizable. I realized I never even screen-recorded anything during this part of the game. I was too immersed to even remember to do that. Perhaps it’s a biased towards Legends but this by far was one of my favorite DLC storylines in a Pokémon game at this point.
But of course, I wanted to progress in the story so I took the photo of the Duskull, completing the side quest. I was absolutely smiling and tearing up over this and my brain making the connection “Eterna” and “Timeless”, the names of the two areas that had this song placed in. Man, this just made me so happy.
Progressing, we learn about Perrin’s creativity problems with her being a burnt out prodigy and all. Focusing on how others want it and how she could get the most points from judges rather than what she thinks looks good.
Telling her that we take photos how we want the Pokémon to turn out makes her think and gets back into her usual mood.
- Her arc in this is great. It’s relatable and I think expands her character her more. I was afraid that she would be just a pretty face that Pokemon won’t do much with other than take photos and be a Legends homage.
We eventually hear stomping off in the Distance that interrupts the moment. We come to the conclusion that it is the Blood-moon Beast and head towards said direction and can I say, THIS GUY LOOKS FUCKING SICK!!
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First off I love the fact that it looks like a very old Ursaluna as that as lived through the years and seen the world change along side it. The fact that is stands on 2 rather than 4 legs, the Fur being more Ursaring colored and whatever the gray stuff is growing around it? Perhaps more gray fur to represent it’a age?
I just absolutely love how it looks, I was expecting a regular Ursaluna with a red moon instead of the yellow one it has but this absolutely blew me away. It reminds me of the Crystal Onix that was in the anime! A cool super rare variant that looks like that due to the conditions it was in.
- Don’t count this Ursaluna as a regional variant until it’s confirmed that it is.
I also noticed how it didn’t seem to attack either of us until Perrin accidentally snapped a photo with auto flash. It more or less attacked us by us startling it than Anything.
AND DONT GET ME STARTED WITH THE MUSIC!!!
Like gahhhh!! Like there’s no such thing as a Alpha Pokémon in Present day Pokémon but using the alpha theme to express the tension and idea that this is no ordinary Ursaluna is so good !!
And when you get into the battle with it- LIKE OMG!! The Wild Pokémon battle music used for this just made me scream. And it’s blood moon move One-shorting some of my Pokémon, I was terrified of losing LMAO
- I loved the occasional times that Perrin motives you and cheers you on, I just enjoy the small cutscenes that’s main/ significant characters do that!
But we catch the Ursaluna and the main story part ends. I do enjoy the cute mentions of her taking photos of us while we battled and how they’re her favorite. She wants me fr fr.
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She talks about needing to develop them right away and tells us a family saying and We eventually decided to meet back at Mossui.
Again, the call backs/references to Adaman and her being a descendant of the Diamond Clan is just so good! As you can assume, I was just screaming like “Adaman Reference!” And bouncing off the walls. I was at an all time high at this point.
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As an Adaman and Legends fan, I was being fed!! With these small details. She also mentioned her dad and how he used the Shaymin Tent but im not sure if we’ll ever see her father. And if he were to be shown, don’t be surprised if I start simping for him too.
- Also can we mention the pose she does whenever she is idol sometimes? The fact that she puts her hand in her pockets like Adaman? Like I can’t be reading too much into it, that’s clearly a Adaman reference, right? IDK IM HAPPY ABOUT THIS
But the rest of the dialogue is her completing her arc of taking photos of how she wants it and now focusing on perfection and the photography standards. I also think it’s cute that she didn’t know the player’s name until now and does a endearing reintroduction with pride. She then gives you a Hisuian Growlith that enjoys battling and talks about how Growliths “like these” tend to come in pairs but even when separated they’re paths will surely cross again. She just confessed to me guys, don’t worry you’re all invited to our wedding, not delusional I swear.
-but guess the Growliths are still around but not often seen based on how she’s referring to them idk
But she leaves and that’s pretty much the end of the story! I do hope we see her again in either a different title or in the next wave but I don’t see her being in the next one. If I remember correctly, it will take place in Blueberry Academy and it’s in the middle of the ocean or something LMAO
Okay but overall: 10/10 experience for the Perrin Storyline!
I am super easy to please but I think it’s such a good story! Did wish it was longer or we had the opportunity to have her stay and have her have like a few more small quests/surveys like that are photo related after the main story? Kinda like how Mai was where you just had to catch Pokémon during the Massive Mass Outbreaks DLC.
My brain is starting to power down but I do wish for Pokémon to do more stories where you get cool unique Pokémon variants that are not shown. Again I hope it’s not a region variant for Ursaluna cause that would make it a whole lot cooler. He’s definitely going on my team.
Im very satisfied with the DLC and i hope we can get more Legends Content in the future. RIP Ingo, Unova Legends could be a good way to some how bring him back is all I’m saying *wink wink nudge nudge*
If you made it this far, thanks! You should comment your thoughts just saying if not then that’s cool too I’m just here to let me brainrot juices out!
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klixxy · 3 years
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Genshin Fic Recs
so... i ventured into the vast world of Google looking for some good GI fic recs... only to find such a pitiful amount that i was promptly devastated. therefore, the solution is to make my own! :D
keep in mind most of these will be ChiLi or XingYun, and yes, i will try not to include smut unless it was one i really really liked. if anyone wants a separate list for just smut (though that will most likely be shorter) i can try to make one later.`
ft. my bookmark comments :)
CHILI
wrapped up in pure gold by beyondwinter
(chili; accidental marriage; chili/childe-centric; 22k words; ongoing)
"Do you understand its meaning, Childe?" He finally asks. There's a hard glint in his eyes, like he's trying to steel himself for his answer.
"Yeah." Loyalty and devotion, right? Between business partners? "I do. It's traditional, isn't it?"
Zhongli's eyes glow a warm amber in the near darkness, reflecting the soft shine of the lanterns. He studies his face with a strange intensity, as though Childe were a piece of high quality Nocticulous Jade being sold for suspiciously small sum and he's trying to find the blemishes that would explain the price. The weight of his gaze should be uncomfortable, boring into him like he can see into the very depths of his abyss-tainted soul, but Childe finds himself preening under the attention instead.
Childe accidentally proposes to Zhongli. Zhongli accepts.
The World is Water by Millereflets
(chili; smut; hurt/comfort; chili-centric; 7k words; oneshot)
Childe doesn't visit Zhongli until it's almost too late.
(my bookmarks: HOW DO YOU MAKE A SMUT SCENE SO POETIC HOLY SHITTTTT)
Set in Stone by seredemia
(chili; fake dating au; angst; some smut?; chili/chiilde-centric; 55k words; ongoing)
What do you do when you write about a certain six thousand year old consultant so much in your letters that it somehow convinces your entire family you're not only dating each other, but that you're also engaged?
In Childe's case, the answer is plain and simple: he goes along with it, of course. Absolutely nothing can go wrong if he makes a contract with the God of Contracts, vowing that the two of them will pretend to be lovers for the duration of his family's stay in Liyue. Afterwards, they'll return as normal and speak no more of this mess. No feelings or complications involved whatsoever.
Contract accepted. A fool-proof plan set in stone. Right?
Private Ledger of the Eleventh Harbinger by JuHuaTai
(chili; humor; getting together; chili/ekaterina-centric; 5k words; oneshot)
“So guess what I did next?”
Ekaterina contemplated not answering, but Harbinger Tartaglia was just… grinning and waiting. It’s honestly rather creepy the longer time passed.
In the end, she gave a long suffering sigh that seems lost on him, “You bought him the Erhu—“
“I bought him the antique, cor lapis based Erhu,”
-
When she first left her homeland for the unknown nation of Liyue, Ekaterina was ready to be many things: To be a soldier, to fell Tsaritsa’s enemies in her name, to bring glory to Snezhnaya and her leader.
Being a receptionist in a cozy bank wasn’t so bad in comparison, but she absolutely can do without the front row seat to Harbinger Tartaglia’s (expensive) love life.
i know i'm where i'm meant to go by paperclips (pastel_paperclips)
(chili; humor; fluff; chili-centric; 12k words; ongoing)
"Childe," Zhongli says suddenly. "I am enjoying myself greatly." Childe’s face breaks into a grin. "Then-" Zhongli gasps, grabbing his wrist and tugging him over to an unsuspecting peddler with a cart full of rocks. "Is that an intrusive igneous pegmatite formed in the Inazuma regions?" Childe’s grin smooths into a small, adoring smile. He has all the time in the world to figure the other man out.
OR: Finding the Geo Archon is on Childe's to-do list but hanging out with Zhongli is significantly more fun.
CHILIVEN
Crumbling Stone by avtorSola
(chiliven; ANGST; PAIN; mind control; zhongli-centric; 74k words; ongoing)
When Morax unleashes his plan to test the Liyue Qixing and his adepti, he does not take into account the stirring of the Abyss Order in the north and the corruption of Dvalin - for why would he fear an organization that works in such shadows? He is secure in his power, after all, unlike his flighty ex, the absentee archon of Mondstadt who rises only when his people are in danger.
But, somehow, the Abyss Order discovers his plan. Somehow, they capitalize on it. And he, the God of Stone who cannot sicken, is struck down - taken by an order bent on destroying all of humanity as Liyue crumbles around him. For even Archons aren't immune to Durin's blood, and Morax is no exception. But then the question becomes - if even Archons may fall to the agony of this corrupting burn - how is their traveling friend Aether immune?
The answer comes from beyond the stars - an ancient malice that knows no kindness or mercy. A malice whose legacy the Abyss Order now bears, seeking to topple all the Archons and their people into the void of utter destruction. And they have begun in Liyue.
Fortunately, it takes a long time to erode stone.
(my bookmarks: IM SCREAMING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)
PLATONIC ZHONGVEN
left-behind city by trixstar
(platonic zhongven; angst; ANGST; venti-centric; 1k words; oneshot)
"An associate of mine has just informed me that Rex Lapis, the Geo Archon has been assassinated."
Venti blinks.
Or: Venti and how he copes with finding out he is all that remains.
i circle ten thousand years long; and i still do not know if i am a falcon, a storm, or an unfinished song by birdsofpassage
(platonic zhongven; angst; hurt/comfort; zhongven-centric; 4k words; oneshot)
Venti and Zhongli, and the vignettes of a much-needed vacation around Mondstadt.
(my bookmarks: ; - ;      ;  -  ; )
oh ye with little faith by air_fried_air
(platonic zhongven; angst; hurt/comfort; zhongven-centric; 2k words; oneshot)
Two former archons do a little tour around Mondstadt.
(my bookmarks: why are all genshin angst fics so melancholy.... i feel so empty)
the wind through the mountain tops by glassdrachma
(platonic zhongven; humor; hurt/comfort; zhongven-centric; 21k words; finished)
Boredom brings Barbatos of Mondstadt to bother a certain ex-Archon of the Earth.
(my bookmarks: venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship venti zhongli friendship-)
XINGYUN
the art of exorcism by Agried
(xingyun; ghost au; hurt/comfort; chongyun-centric; 9k words; oneshot)
On the road back from one of his jobs, Chongyun runs into Xingqiu, the wandering swordsman. And then they keep meeting, over and over again. or, alternately; how a ghost and an exorcist learn how to love, one step at a time.
Bane of All Evil by tzitzimeme
(xingyun; humor; romance; chongyun-centric; 24k words; hiatus)
When Chongyun unintentionally offends Liyue's second most powerful adepti, he vows to mend the thorny relationship between Adeptus Xiao and human exorcists-- even though no one has succeeded in currying Xiao's favor for over a thousand years.
His best friend Xingqiu offers to come alone, mainly because he's worried about what kind of trouble Chongyun will run into. Along the way, they receive help from others: Xiangling packs them meals for their journeys, while Zhongli gives them advice on what demons to track.
Childe is just there because he thinks the whole thing is hilarious.
[On indefinite hiatus due to burnout; sorry!]
kiss me slowly (so i don't forget) by xiwangmu
(xingyun; humor; romance; light angst; xingqiu-centric; 8k words; oneshot)
Wangshu Inn Bulletin Board
Guest Message: My best friend whom I harbor affections for kissed me last night, but due to his special condition he does not recall a single moment of it. I am quite conflicted about whether to disclose these events to him or not, because that would most certainly require me to confess my feelings as well. If anyone has experience in romancing boys with excessive positive energy, this one humbly asks you to share some advice.
Reply: Our greatest apologies—although we would like to offer some words in response, we simply cannot decipher your handwriting. Perhaps you may return with a neater message next time?
time trials by idlestars
(xingyun/many ships; humor; modern au; xingyun-centric; 2k words; oneshot)
A modern social media AU.
Xingqiu Teases Demons. Chongyun Almost Cries. [The clip shows Xingqiu, lit by the sickly green of night vision, as he stares bored into a dark room. He’s alone - Chongyun left to see if Xingqiu could lure out the ghosts. Xingqiu glances at the camera, smirks, and then opens his mouth.
“Hey demons, it’s me, yah boy.”]
OTHER/GEN
woe be the wallet of the god of wealth by glassdrachma
(gen; humor; identity reveal; keqing/zhongli-centric; 12k words; finished)
Or, the story of how the Yuheng of the Qixing came to idolize, befriend, and discover the identity of the God of Geo, in that order.
(personal comments: hilarious, made me burst out into laughter multiple times, and was just a masterful piece of writing)
to dream of dust by miao_x
(guili/gen; ANGST; hurt/no comfort; zhongli-centric; 5k words; oneshot)
Some nights, Zhongli dreams.
He dreams of soft light, golden song, and a gentle breeze whispering tales of millennia past. It is warm, familiar, and comforting.
It feels like home.
And then he opens his eyes, and awakes to reality.
(my bookmarks: oh zhongli... made me cry)
To drown in your own tears by C_rin_nyan
(guili/gen; ANGST; TEARS; PAIN; zhongli-centric; 2k words; oneshot)
As Rex Lapis, he had never shed a tear, even as he slaughtered hundreds, destruction following his every step. As Zhongli, he had shed much more than he would like to admit, however.
Or, “Zhongli’s soul gave its last scream long ago, yet even now, the echo of said sound was still strong enough to reach Rex Lapis.”
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graceful-starker · 3 years
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*finger guns* starkercest. cousins, or brothers, maybe omegaverse? *scratches head* maybe alpha peter? maybe something dark? i don’t know😂
Somehow, I don’t think I’ve ever done a cousin AU! Time to rectify this.
Tws: ua, starkercest, omegaverse, dubcon, dark fic, dd:dne.
~~~
Tony huffs angrily, slouching even further. “I don’t understand why we have to do this. Why can’t he just stay with his other aunt and uncle? Why does he have to stay with us?”
“Because Peter is an alpha,” Maria says, choking on her tears. She still is having a hard time coping with the death of her sister and brother in law. “And Richard’s brother is an beta that married a beta. They don’t know how to raise an alpha! I’m an omega and your father is an alpha, we are much better equipped to raised an alpha.”
Tony huffs again, crossing his arms over his chest. “He’s going to be so annoying though!” The omega whines. “I bet he’s going to stick up the whole house with his stupid alpha stench.”
Howard barks a laugh, rolling his eyes and continuing to drive. “Don’t worry, son. You’ll be on opposite sides of the mansion, I promise. You’ll get used to it eventually, it’ll be like how you can barley smell my scent anymore.”
Tony scoffs again. As if. “That only works if you’re immediate family that grew up together. Im 17, and he’s 12. His scent won’t fade.”
Maria sniffles and turns to face him. “Will you please stop making my sister’s death an inconvenience for you! I am so sorry that your life is over because your little cousin’s parents died and now he needs a new home, how awful for you!” She turns back around with a huff, pulling out a tissue and blowing her nose.
Tony sinks in on himself, whimpering submissively. His omegan mother never yells, or loses her temper like that. He truly pushed her too far. “Sorry, oma,” he says softly. He tries to sound submissive and obedient, so her scent will calm down.
It works, and Maria only sighs. “It’s fine. I know this is a big adjustment, and you’re sad too…Just…he needs us, okay? At least try to act like you don’t already hate him being here. Okay?”
“Yes oma,” he says quickly. He enjoys pissing his alphan father off, but not his mother. He likes and respects her.
“Good,” and that’s the last thing they say until they arrive at the Parker’s house.
~
Peter worms his way into Tony’s bed, again, sniffling and smelling of scared alpha. “Tones?” He whispers softly.
Tony groans, rolling over. “Go away! I told you, you can’t sleep in my room anymore!”
“Please Tony,” he begs, crying as he pulls the covers down. “I-“
“No! I’m in my heat, you can’t be in here! No alphas allowed.”
“Please oma!” He cries and sniffles, and-
And Fuck.
You’re only supposed to call the pack omega or your omega oma. In modern day, that means your mom or your spouse. And since Tony isn’t a mom-
“Stop that. You’re driving me crazy.” He ruts his hips against the bed, slick already gathering in his entrance.
“Oma,” Peter whines, crawling under the covers and holding onto Tony’s feverish body. “You smell really good,” he whispers.
Tony moans, eyes fluttering. This is so wrong. “Don’t, Pete. We’re cousins. It’s wrong.”
“What’s wrong?” He asks, sniffing loudly. He moves his hand over Tony’s body, just feeling it.
“Stop,” Tony whines, but doesn’t stop him. “You can’t. You can’t but your fingers inside of my wet, desperate hole, okay? You can’t. It’s-ah!”
Peter had done just that—he pushed his fingers under Tony’s panties, and pushed two of his fingers into the wet hole at once. He’s surprised it made his older cousin make that noise; he doesn’t really understand any of this. “Oma? Why not?”
Tony gasps and pushes his hips back onto the fingers, squeezing his walls around them. “F-fuck, alpha,” he breathes, already leaking. “Because we’re family!” He argues.
“But you smell happier when I do this!” He argues back, scissoring his fingers apart and enjoying the happy keen it earns.
“It’s still wrong,” Tony pretends to fight. He pants and gasps, spreading his legs. “And you—you definitely can’t put your dick inside of me, Pete. That’s only for mates to do, not for you-oh god, I said no!”
Peter pulled Tony’s panties down his thighs, and then promptly pushed himself into Tony’s wet and warm hole. “I Can do it, see? I’m just fine. Now can I please stay in here? I don’t want nightmares!”
Tony squirms, whimpering. “N-no you can’t. You can’t stay, and you can’t m-move your hips, and you can’t knot me! You have t-to pull out, and go to your own room! Fuck, alpha!” He moans louder, holding on for dear life as his little cousin ruts into him.
His inexperience and lack of knowledge is showing; he isn’t putting any effort into making the omega feel good. But that doesn’t even matter. Because Tony is in heat, and just the fact that he’s getting fucked is enough.
“N-no, Peter! Get o-off me! You’ll get me pregnant!” He yells, tears streaming down his face.
“Do I get to stay in your room if I get you pregnant?” He asks, sounding so innocent yet so dirty at the same time.
“No!” Tony wails, eyes rolling back into his head. He wants to cum so bad. He wants Peter to cum inside him, and he wants to get knocked up, and he wants to give his alpha so many babies. As many as he wants. “Please stop alpha, you can’t do this!”
Peter licks at Tony’s scent gland, nuzzling it’s as he takes in the pheromones. “You don’t smell like you want me to stop.”
Tony sobs, pushing his hips back to meet Peter’s thrusts. He doesn’t bother responding. He’s put up enough of a verbal fight to defend his honor.
But as daddy dearest always reminds Tony; an alpha is going to take what an alpha wants. It’s Tony’s job to make alphas happy.
If only daddy dearest saw them now.
“Don’t cum inside me. Don’t knot me! You’ll knock me up, please don’t impregnate me!”
Peter speeds up his hips, moaning into Tony’s scent gland as his knot pops and locks them into place. “Now I have to stay in here. We’re stuck.”
Tony sobs, covering his face and whimpering. “Whatever.” He groans as he feels Peter continuously fill him up. He hopes Peter can go again pretty soon; his heat is already ruling him back up again. “When Howard asks, I told you to stop, got it?”
“Got it,” Peter grins, grinding down as another load floods his omega’s guts.
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sineala · 3 years
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A Few Thoughts About Hurt/Comfort
I have been asked this month to make a post about hurt/comfort in Avengers comics. And I love h/c -- I actually have a massive number of WIPs right now that are h/c -- so I am very happy to talk about it! Anyway, this is not really all that planned out and this mostly turned into an excursus on Tony Stark's pain. I'm sure you're all surprised.
Like pretty much everyone else, I'm sure, I have found that everything lately has been... pretty tough. And the coping mechanism that really got me through last year and this year was reading and writing a lot of h/c, on the theory that, however lousy a day I'm having, I can absolutely make sure that Tony Stark has a worse one. And then I can make sure he gets hugs. Wish fulfillment? Why, yes. (Once at Hallmark I was trying to find a "get well soon" card, forgot what it was called, and described it to my wife as "a hurt/comfort card.") I think Marvel Comics -- the Avengers side, in particular -- is an interesting canon for h/c for a lot of reasons. Though, honestly, if you asked me to recommend you, a hurt/comfort fan, a new fandom, I would probably just hand you some Starsky & Hutch DVDs. Go watch "The Fix" and get back to me later. If you like that, there's way more where that came from. But there's still lots to love in Marvel! Superhero comics are really a goldmine as far as the hurt side of h/c. Because superheroes, and you probably have noticed this, get hurt a lot. They get hurt repeatedly, in fantastical ways that are probably impossible in real life both physically and emotionally (at least, I don't think anyone's invented mind control yet), and even the heroes without superhuman healing powers tend to get physically hurt a whole lot worse than actual people can take. Currently in Iron Man comics, Tony has a broken back and is dealing with this by locking himself into the armor as a backboard and injecting himself with massive doses of painkillers. He's busy! He's got stuff to do! He doesn't have time to lie around and heal! So, basically, if you name a kind of pain that you would like to see happen to a character, it's probably happened to superheroes. Multiple times. The downside, though, is that comics do not really deliver that well when it comes to the comfort part of h/c. They could. It's not inherent to the medium that they don't. But because of the serial nature of comics and also the fact the primary audience is dudes who want to read about people in spandex punching each other, a lot of the time they don't really feel the need to provide closure and write about people dealing with any of the hurt. (Raise your hand if you're still annoyed with the end of Hickman's Avengers run.) But at the same time, I think that's a quality that makes Avengers ripe for h/c fanfic. Because, generally speaking, fandom likes to provide the things that canon doesn't, and fandom is more than happy to provide the comfort. If you enjoy canonical h/c in comics, I think you really can't go wrong with Iron Man. One of the big innovations of modern Marvel Comics was the concept that heroes would also suffer from relatable human problems, and in practice what this means is that a lot of heroes start with a fully-loaded angst-ridden backstory and origin story, ripe for h/c. So Tony starts out by incurring a heart injury that he fully expects is going to kill him, which he responds to by vowing he won't get close to anyone so they won't be sad when he dies, and throughout the early Silver Age is constantly on the brink of death as his heart nearly gives out on him practically every issue. And then even after his heart gets (mostly) better, there are various plots involving his armor being detrimental to his health and him choosing to fight on anyway. It's hard for me to think of another superhero hitting that particular variety of h/c in exactly the same way. Sure, superheroes risk their lives constantly, because this is how superhero comics work, but Tony is the only one I can think of who is this constantly this badly off, physically. Like, think of all the other heroes who have had a continual solo presence as fan favorites across Marvel history -- Captain America, Thor, Spider-Man, Wolverine, maybe even Deadpool. You know what those guys all have? Healing factors! For the most part, they are not running around continually on the verge of death, and while there are certainly memorable arcs involving several of them being severely injured and/or dead, you really have to work at it. It's not their constant state of affairs, whereas Tony is the kind of superhero who shows up to a fight already bleeding out under his armor. Yeah, I know Extremis gave him a healing factor. But he didn't have it very long, and also he did some extremely dangerous things while he did have it; I'm pretty sure I've never seen Wolverine saying that he'll just solve a problem by cutting off his own foot. So, anyway, yeah, there are a bunch of good arcs involving h/c for Tony. If you're looking for physical injury, he has a whole bunch of heart problems over the years, gets several new hearts, then ruins his brain, et cetera. That level of hurt is basically the background pain of Tony's life; every so often, his heart will get damaged or he'll have to live in the armor or the armor will be killing him, et cetera. If you're looking for more unusual trauma, I am, as always, going to rec Manhunt, a relatively obscure arc in late v3 (IM v3 #65-69) in which Tony has an extremely bad week. His tech is stolen and used to bomb a building. Then he gets shot in the chest. Then while he's at the hospital a nurse tries and fails to poison him, and she then tries to beat him to death. Then he checks himself out of the hospital and a helicopter shoots missiles at him. Then he becomes a fugitive from justice. And then, oh, yeah, he has to fight the Mandarin. It is... a lot. (Volume 3 of Iron Man is pretty good as far as h/c possibilities. You've got a lot of physical pain, Carol's drinking arc, the Sentient Armor, both DreamVision arcs, and Manhunt. Manhunt is finally supposed to be out in trade this month, by the way.) There are of course the drinking arcs, which probably count as their own type of hurt. But if you haven't read the second drinking arc (IM #160-200), please do. Marvel likes to up the stakes on events (Fear Itself, Secret Empire) by making Tony drink, and it does work, I think. I feel like I've spoken at length about Tony's drinking elsewhere so I don't really want to rehash it all here. And then there's the emotional pain. Angst and drama is something that happens to a whole bunch of characters, yes, especially in comics, but somehow Tony seems to end up with possibly more than his fair share of it. Fandom likes to make a lot of Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, so much so that you might think, if you didn't know canon, that this was just fandom running with a throwaway mention of Tony's terrible childhood and making it worse. But, no, canon really does go there with a reasonable amount of frequency. Howard's actual first appearance is in a flashback where he's ordering teenage Tony to break up with his girlfriend because she's the daughter of one of Howard's business rivals. And then we get into the verbal abuse, and the physical abuse, and the time Howard made Tony take his first drink, and the part where Howard was a demon in hell who Tony fought while he insulted him. And more! Currently, in canon, Howard is alive again and is in league with Mephisto for the express purpose of ruining Tony's life. Also when Tony was a baby, Howard tried to trade him to Dracula. I think you can make an argument that fandom is actually showing restraint when compared to canon. Tony also has a whole lot of Terrible Exes whose presence and/or former presence in Tony's life can be used for a lot of hurt. If you've read any amount of fanfic, you probably know that the exes who get the most play in fandom are Sunset Bain and Tiberius Stone -- not that Tony and Ty were ever canonically a couple, of course, but fandom is definitely enamored of this idea. Ty and Sunset both have relatively similar interactions with Tony in canon, in that they are both liars and emotional abusers, heavy on the gaslighting, with the purpose of becoming more successful than Tony. They both also attempt to murder Tony, although this is after he figures out they're evil, at least. (Yes, I know, this is not how either of them usually appear in AUs.) Tony also has a bunch of exes who also have just straight-up tried to murder or otherwise hurt him, sometimes while they are dating, and sometimes before Tony dates them: Whitney Frost, Indries Moomji, Kathy Dare, and Maya Hansen come to mind. There are probably more I'm not thinking of! But, yes, if you want to write about a guy in a series of terrible relationships, please consider Iron Man comics. If mind control is one of your favorite flavors of hurt, Tony's pretty good for that too. We all know about The Crossing. I suppose when I say "mind control" I mostly mean "armor control" because there are an awful lot of plots where someone else makes Tony's armor do whatever they want it to do and Tony is along for the ride -- Demon in a Bottle, Sentient Armor, and Execute Program are the first things that come to mind. There is also a fairly obscure What If that is What If Iron Man Lost The Armor Wars in which Justin Hammer apparently really wants Tony in a mind control collar to take off all his clothes and lounge around in his underwear. No, really. I think a lot of pain for Tony often revolves around his issues with control, generally -- his alcoholism comes into play here again. The entire aftermath of Civil War is also notable for its propensity to hurt Tony over and over and over. Is he stoically soldiering on through his grief after Steve dies? Hell, no! He cries, like, six separate times. He 100% blames himself for Steve's death. It's great. Everybody loves The Confession and the funeral in Fallen Son, but one of my personal favorites is Avengers/Invaders, in which Tony is confronted with a time-traveling Steve from WWII and in order not to screw up the timeline, he can't tell Steve he knows him. He is clearly not coping well. He shuts himself in a room with a giant wall of pictures of Steve! Also there's a part where he has to try to convince Steve he can trust him and he ends up having to tie Steve to a chair to talk to him, and Steve looks at him and asks, "Who did you kill to get where you are?" and I feel like that is probably one of the worst moments in Tony's life. No wonder he gave himself amnesia. So now we might want to ask, okay, but why is hurting Tony in fanfiction so much fun? I mean, I can tell you why I think it's fun. I can't speak for anyone else. One reason is that he is very emotional and very affected by everything he does. Sometimes you will see people complaining that the heroes of m/m fanfic cry too much and this is not realistic. This is not a problem if you're writing Tony! He can cry as much as you want and it's perfectly in character. I don't think it would be as fun to hurt him if he didn't express so much of his pain. But he does. He also feels guilty, and for me that's a very satisfying character element. If he were well-adjusted and didn't blame himself for so many things, it wouldn't be nearly as fun as watching him blame himself for everyone whose death he thinks he is responsible for, whether or not he is. And then he just keeps going, and it's, y'know, nice to watch him be resilient, too. So, I guess, I think hurting him is interesting because it's easy to hurt him, his weak points are pretty obvious, and he reacts a lot. Steve doesn't hurt quite as much as Tony does, in canon. It's certainly possible to hurt him -- I mean, they did actually kill him after Civil War, after all -- but I don't think the canonical patterns of hurting him are as numerous. Obviously deseruming Steve is a fairly popular go-to in terms of physical hurt; he's been deserumed at least three times that I know of. I think's easy to see the appeal there of taking a character who is fairly physically resilient and making him... much less so. Certainly Marvel seems to see the appeal. But other than that I don't think he has any other really common way to get physically injured. Unlike Tony, whose origin story is basically "oh no, I've acquired a disability," Steve's origin story is "I drank a serum that cured all my disabilities." Which, I mean, great wish fulfillment but there's not really as much there to poke at. Pretty much all of Steve's pain is emotional, but, unlike Tony, his pain isn't often specifically in response to someone directly, purposefully hurting him. Hickman's Avengers run is a big exception, yes. His pain seems to come up most often as a kind of situational angst. He feels like a man out of time. He feels out of touch with the modern era, with people his own age. He feels guilt because he feels responsible for Bucky's death. He feels like he can't trust the government and therefore he can't be Captain America. He worries that he doesn't know how to have a normal life. And, yes, these are deep and important worries but it's different than, like, Indries Moomji dumping Tony with the intent to make him sad enough to start drinking. Very few of Steve's villains want to personally ruin Steve's entire life the way Tony's villains do; mostly they just want to do things like bring back the Nazis. In terms of Steve's potential for h/c, I think Steve is harder to hurt than Tony is. Physically, he is definitely harder to hurt. You can deserum him, sure, but unless you want everything you write to be a deseruming fic you're probably not going to want to do that more than a couple of times. And if you want to hurt him physically while he has the serum, you have to hurt him hard. Usually past the point where a regular human would ever survive it. He's also harder to break, emotionally, than Tony is -- which means it's very satisfying when you can get him to break, but this is a guy who's only cried twice (that I remember) in canon. So if you want to get him to cry, you really, really have to wreck him, and he doesn't have as many obvious weak spots. He also doesn't generally sit around blaming himself for things that aren't his fault, and the whole "stewing in guilt" genre of plots for him basically came down to "he was sad that he thought Bucky's death was his fault," and that's really the biggest regret he seems to have, and also Bucky's not dead anymore. The Steve/Tony relationship itself, I would think, is also appealing to h/c fans because canon provides a lot of ways for them to hurt each other. Some people only ship pairings who would never, y'know, take turns beating each other half to death in major event comics. (And for a lot of Marvel Comics history, that was also Steve & Tony, so if you want them to be BFFs who have never fought, you can just set your fic earlier.) They have definitely hurt each other both physically and emotionally, so if you're looking for something easy and satisfying as a h/c fan, you can just read or write something where they... make up. What about Marvel characters other than Steve and Tony? Surely some of them are angsty, yes? Well, yes, but also it depends on the particular flavor of angst that you like. If you like the way Tony hurts, you may very well enjoy Doctor Strange comics, because they have a very similar attitude towards life -- they are both former alcoholics whose origin stories involve physical disabilities, who routinely make tactical decisions that negatively affect their continued existence and/or happiness a whole lot. It's very much an "I must suffer alone in the dark and no one will ever know what I am doing to save the world but it's the right thing to do" sort of vibe. Like, you can read comics where Strange is lying in hell with two broken legs, hallucinating that Clea has finally come to save him. Strange's biggest fear, akin to Tony's control issues, is basically that one day he's going to be an asshole again, so he's out there trying as hard as he can to do good. Also, if you like tentacles, he has all of them. I mean that. Carol also occasionally hits similar angst spots, and her drinking arc is great. A lot of people like Natasha, too; I have read zero Black Widow comics but I get the impression many people enjoy her brand of angst. The mutant metaphor is a little different in terms of overall vibe, but some people really like it as a source of angst -- the whole "protecting a world who hates and fears them" thing. It may not work for you, but if you like your hurt to include things like systemic oppression, go pick up some X-Men comics. Start with something like God Loves Man Kills. I feel like I liked this sort of thing a lot more as a teenager but that I kind of aged out of liking the mutants quite so much. It's also worth mentioning that not everything that hits the spot in one universe will be the same in the others, and I'm mentioning this because I feel like I have to say something about MCU Bucky. MCU fandom seems to get a lot of mileage out of Bucky's guilt about being the Winter Soldier, everything he was forced to do, et cetera. I have definitely read my share of those fics, and FATWS sure went right for that angst too. But as far as I can tell, he doesn't hit the same way at all in 616. And I like him a lot in 616; I'm always pleased when he shows up on a team. (He was so good in Strikeforce. Everyone was so good in Strikeforce.) But the thing is, 616 Bucky is, basically, phenomenally well-adjusted, given everything he's gone through, and I'm including the time he wrestled a bear in a gulag. He gets over having been the Winter Soldier, and now he's just, y'know, a guy with a cool arm who likes to bring guns to every fight to horrify his teammates, and he snarks at Clint. If you're looking for that angst, that is really not him these days. He's all better. So pretty much all that is canon. So what do we do in fandom for h/c? Well, as far as I can tell, a decent amount of it is canon-based or very canon-close -- there are a whole lot of stories exploring the angst of Civil War or Hickman's Avengers run. Tony's drinking comes up a fair amount, and if one of Tony's Evil Exes comes back to haunt him, it's pretty much only Tiberius Stone. I don't think I've read a lot of fic with Steve getting deserumed; it doesn't seem as popular in fandom as in canon. When Steve gets hurt, he tends to just get physically whumped pretty hard, and there's a fair amount of that for Tony too, but of course Steve can take more. There's also a thriving, uh, subgenre of pain involving Hydra Steve doing terrible things to Tony, presumably the terrible things he would have wanted to do to Tony in canon if Tony had had a flesh body. There's the usual kinds of h/c setups that appear in basically every fandom as well -- sickfic, whump, dub-con/non-con. You get the idea. But since fandom in general likes to take specific inspiration from canon, there's a lot of fic where the hurt tends to resemble things that happen more in canon. Like, I feel like comics fic probably has more tentacle fic and more mind control than canons that don't come pre-stocked with those. Probably everybody has a whole lot of "tied up by bad guys," though. And then, of course, fandom brings the comfort that canon does not. This is true in pretty much every fandom -- I mean, you aren't going to find a lot of actual canons where Character A saves Character B from mortal peril and then there's gay sex -- but, like I was saying, comics don't provide a lot of closure before it's onto the next thing. Usually with a different creative team, who has no interest in wrapping up anything from the last team. Steve and Tony talked about the incursions exactly once after Secret Wars and nobody mentioned the part where Steve spent several months trying to hunt Tony down and kill him. Tony is never going to remember the events of Civil War. Hydra Steve died ignominiously in a fire and no one has ever talked about him again. Honestly, if you're looking for a way to get some comfort in your fanfic, picking an event, any event, and just having the characters talk about it will be way more than any of them get in canon. I feel like honestly that can often be a pretty satisfying to read. And even though comics canon physically hurts characters pretty often and pretty badly, they also often skip right past the recovery. Maybe you'll get one page of a character in a hospital bed at the end of the story arc. Maybe you won't. Demon in a Bottle has one splash page of Tony going through alcohol withdrawal and then he's all better. I think Manhunt skips to Tony getting out of the hospital at the end. That's just not a story that they want to tell very often. The second drinking arc is notable in that it devotes almost as many issues to Tony's recovery as it does to getting him to rock-bottom. Similarly, Steve is done with his Nomad angst way way faster than you probably think he is (though The Captain does go in for a fair number of issues). So one of the things we often want to do in fandom is focus on all the bits that canon skips over, both in the "why did no one ever mention this story arc ever again" way and the "wow, so how long are they in the hospital after that" way. That's really all I can think of about h/c! I'm off to write some more of it!
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ttttaehyungie · 4 years
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sincerely, but no longer yours | chapter 5
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series masterlist
sincerely, but no longer yours | ex!kim namjoon x reader
genre | angst, smut, exes au
summary | It started as a coping mechanism as getting the words out provided a form of catharsis. But now you can’t stop writing these love letters, even with the knowledge that they’ll never get sent. After all, who writes love letters to their ex?
word count | 5.2k
chapter rating | 18+
warnings | angst, smut (but it’s angsty smut lksjdflk help), nipple play, dry humping, alcohol consumption, someee intense jealousy
a/n | FIRST OF ALL im so sorry this is so incredibly late lskjdflkjs life has been extremely busy for me 😪 but it’s here!!!! thank you to everybuddy who’s been waiting patiently for this 🤧🤧 but i think this is one of the most angsty chapters of the series soooo ��
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Namjoon’s an expert at avoiding uncomfortable topics, even if they’re massively serious. It’s something you absolutely hated and it was the cause of many arguments in your previous relationship, and perhaps was even the ultimate cause of your breakup.
But right now, you’re really beginning to understand the appeal.
The first time he swung by the museum for lunch after his birthday celebration - a paper bag in hand filled with bagels still warm and toasty from the store on the corner that you adore - you were caught entirely off guard.
Your mind jumps to the unread messages sitting in your texts and you regret ignoring them. Not because the guilt had hit you, but because maybe if you had been contactable, you would have received a heads-up that he was coming by.
Some might call it selfish, but you prefer to call it self-preservation.
To be fair, it’s not like you were going to leave them unanswered forever. You just needed space to collect your thoughts and make sense of your confusing emotions first, lest you begin the conversation prematurely and drag Namjoon down into the dizzying depths of your current state. As it is right now, your thoughts are like nodes floating in a decontextualized void, the web still unformed because you haven’t had the time to grapple with everything yet.
But here he is, inspecting the cross-section of each bagel Soo-eun pulls out of the bag, trying to identify which is which. Yeri’s at his side, gushing about how great the bagels from this place are. The three of them are crowded around the paper bag that sits on the wooden bench, the paint peeling from the way it’s been bleached by the sun in the museum’s outdoor area. Here he is at your workplace. With your friends. You can’t ignore him now, not without rousing your friends’ suspicion.
But what you can ignore is the issue.
It’s not the time nor the place to talk about this anyway. The atmosphere is warm and light, carrying traces of last night’s celebratory mood. The lunch treat is Namjoon’s way of appreciating the surprise you guys organized for him last night. And there’s a bagel stuffed full of salty sweet ham and sticky melty cheese waiting for you to sink your teeth into. Really not the time for serious conversations at all.
So when Namjoon’s eyes search yours, all wide and probing, as you step in to grab your share, you simply smile and thank him, before slinking away to join Soo-eun on the next bench. Not too far - barely five steps away - but far enough that it gives you space to breathe. Even if Namjoon notices your attempts at escaping, he doesn’t have time to call you out on it. Not when you slyly shoot Yeri a wink. Seamlessly, she catches the cue and sits herself down on the bench, tugging at his arm. For once, you welcome Yeri flirting with Namjoon.
“Let’s eat! I’m starving,” she says.
You don’t miss the way Namjoon’s gaze flickers between you and Yeri, but you ignore it and take a generous bite of the bagel in your hands.
“Mm, so good,” you say, and turn to Soo-eun. “Don’t you miss the days before this place got really popular?”
“No, because you and Yeri insisted on going there every day. I can only ingest so many bagels a week.”
“____ hasn’t changed one bit.” Namjoon chuckles. “This time in middle school, she ate tater tots every single day for three weeks straight. She had to be banned for a week.”
“Are you weaponizing my middle school past against me?” you ask amidst your friends’ laughter. “Too bad. I don’t regret it for a second. Tater tots are too delicious to regret.”
Lunch falls back into the easy rhythm of lighthearted jibes, the kitchen debacle receding for now.
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Procrastination is a real bitch of a habit to kick. As soon as one reason to put it off expires, your brain churns out another two in its place like a modern-day Hydra.
As for Namjoon? Well, you’re not surprised when he makes no moves to initiate the difficult conversation. After all, you’re adopting his bad habit.
Eventually it gets to the point where you might as well not talk about it at all. Everything’s going fine so far without it. Or as fine as it can be with this beast looming in the backdrop.
You know you need to just get this damn conversation over with. But you can’t. Not till you figure out what exactly is going on with your emotions. Without it, there’s no way you can cauterize the wounds and invalidate your excuses for what they are -- excuses.
It’s not that you haven’t tried. But it’s presenting itself as a real Herculean effort. Mulling it over has you tossing and turning in bed, only leaving you with a headache and a steadily growing desperation. It’s desperation enough that you leave the comfortable warmth of your bed to sit at your desk, shivering as you pen the familiar words once again.
Dear Namjoon,
The words flow in their usual, unrestricted manner. Before, it had been like a dam breaking, the tight restraint that was normally kept on your emotions finally released and the wave of emotions gushing out till it reached a peaceful equilibrium. But now, your emotions are just a whirlpool and your words you pen mimic its spiralling, chasing your thoughts in endless loops.
You’re not over him. But so what? It’s not like getting together is an option. Not when he hasn’t grown out of one of the major things that caused the end of your previous relationship. And not when you haven’t even talked that out, if you ever will.
So what can you do now? Kicking him out of your life will mean having to deal with the loss that his absence will bring again. Going back to pretending the other doesn’t exist will mean dancing around each other again every time you bump into each other in this too small city. And with the way your social circles are intertwined now, that would mean a bunch of explaining to do.
But having him close yet holding him at arm’s length? Walking the narrow margin that is being friends with your ex? A misstep in either direction would be torturous but inevitable - too close and it’s alarming, but too far and it’s a painful reminder that he’s not yours.
Far from the illuminating effect you were hoping it would have, your letter to Namjoon only leaves you deeper in confusion. You throw your pen down. Giving up, you fold the paper up. Sealing the letter in an envelope doesn’t bring the same sense of relief it did before. The Hydra remains unslain.
And so the problem gets shoved away - the same treatment the letter gets as it’s roughly tossed into the desk drawer - into the same corner of the recesses of your mind that your breakup resides in.
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You know that Namjoon’s confused. Heck, you are too. It’s a strange dance the two of you are involved in, caught between the compulsion to continue yet knowing the risks it bears. Neither of you are bold enough to take the lead. And so this strange stasis drags on as it has for weeks now.
It’s as if the kiss unearthed something in him. Actually no, it’s unearthed something in both of you. And the tension - the fucking tension - is unreal. The tells are so obvious that you wonder how neither Yeri nor Soo-eun have said anything about it yet. There’s certainly no subtlety in the way his eyes linger on your lips in the middle of conversations that you wonder if he’s even aware he’s doing it.
And when it’s just the two of you? It’s infinitely worse.
It’s hard to blame him. Touch has always been your love language and Namjoon knows it. Physical touch wasn’t just a thing of your previous two-year relationship. It was a thing of your decades of friendship too, the little touches so casual and almost subconscious. Rekindling your friendship without them had taken intentional effort.
You’re not sure who started it. Maybe both of you just fell back into it, the casual little touches slipping their way back in. But what’s not casual at all is the way your heartbeat goes erratic at the most simple of gestures. The way he blithely sweeps the crumbs from your lunch off your lap. The slightly too long side-hug he holds you in, the warmth of his arm around you permeating through the layers you wear and has you simultaneously freezing up while also turning your insides to goo. But it isn’t overtly romantic either.
At least, that’s the excuse you give yourself when the comfort of his touch gets too tempting and you end up succumbing to it. The familiarity of it all makes you feel like you’ve finally arrived home. As if you’ve been on this long, arduous journey and you’re finally here. You get to drop the heavy backpack and rest now.
But the voice of rationality in you tells you this wrong wrong wrong. You’ve got to get out of here.
And that’s how you end up here. White-knuckled grip tight on the edges of the sink as you stare yourself dead in the eyes in the bathroom mirror. The music outside thumps away albeit muted through the door to the ladies’. But the way your heart thumps has nothing to do with that.
Even without shifting your gaze, you can tell that your cheeks are slightly reddened and warm. You can feel it tingling. No, you don’t shift your gaze. It stays fixed on the intense stare that your reflection throws back at you like a challenge, the ferocity of it enhanced by the sharp eyeliner you’re wearing tonight, an uncharacteristic look for you.
Heck, this whole night is uncharacteristic.
You could take the easy route and blame it on Yeri. God knows she can be real persuasive - it’s why she’s excellent at her job. So getting you all out to the club on a Friday night to celebrate nothing other than the simple joy that - c’mon guys, we’re all young and alive and free and tell me that’s not worth celebrating and I’ll fucking fistfight you right here and now even with my freshly manicured nails - is no feat for her.
Still, no one really expected your simple reply, tone nonchalant and eyes still glued to your work screen, “Yeah, I could use a night out.”
Soo-eun had remained silent but you could feel her stiffen slightly beside you. Yeri had been surprised too but more elated that she didn’t have to get through your usual ten solid minutes of whining and half-baked attempts at slithering your way out of it.
But back to the present. Your bodycon dress - one of the rare pieces that survived not just your college partying days but also the wardrobe purge that occurred when you had to downsize everything to fit into the tiny apartment that’s quintessential to city-living - expands with your chest as you take a deep breath. Gripping the hem where it sits mid-thigh, you yank it down slightly. It’s been a while since you’ve worn this dress. And while the younger, more risque version of you that was your college self had been enthralled by the daringness of the dress, your current self has to dig deep to muster up that same boldness.
Relenting as you realize that this is the limit to how much you can stretch the length of your dress, you let go and your fingertips unintentionally brush your thigh as it falls back to your side. It elicits a shudder, the sensation of your own fingers too close to the electrifying feeling of someone’s thumb skimming across it. It was electrifying enough that your brain finally powered up again, voice of rationality sending you skedaddling away, out of reach of his touch, and pathetically seeking refuge in the washroom.
You roll your shoulders back and shake your head, dispelling the thoughts. Standing upright, you look yourself in the eye again. You can do this. You’re going to go out there, and you’re going to have a good time with your friends. You’re going to have a good time with Namjoon. With a nod of affirmation, you turn and saunter your way back to the club with a confidence that has your chin firmly tipped upwards.
You push the door open and look for your friends. The sight that greets you immediately punctures your confidence and your steady posture falls limp.
It’s hard to miss her silvery dress - the dress you knew she would wear and the dress that your very own was meant to counter. It catches the light and grabs attention. And at this moment, it grabs your attention so you can witness Yeri standing between Namjoon’s manspread thighs as he’s perched on the barstool, her hands all over him.
Whatever puffed up confidence you’d had is knocked out of you with that sucker punch of a sight. You turn away, needing to look anywhere but at them.
And that’s when your line of sight falls on a curly-haired man, oddly familiar, and apparently someone you know since he’s waving to you.
“____, hey!” he yells over the music.
“Dong-In?”
He nods and smiles at you. “It’s been a while.”
“Wait.” You gasp. “I was supposed to get back to you on brunch, wasn’t I?” Damn. You’ve been so wrapped up with Namjoon that you totally forgot about Dong-In. “I’m so sorry, I’ve been really caught up with things.”
“It’s no biggie.” He shrugs boyishly. “The exhibition, right?”
“Yeah, yeah.” Sure, the exhibition. Let’s go with that.
“And nothing to do with…” he directs his gaze - and yours along with it - to none other than Namjoon who’s now drinking with Yeri.
Your gaze snaps back to Dong-In and his cheshire grin.
“Nah,” you feign a laugh. “He’s just a friend.”
“The hand he had on you sure didn’t look like just friends.”
“I said we’re just friends,” you snap, then gasp, taken aback by your own outburst. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”
“Nah, I should be the one apologizing. I hit a nerve there, didn’t I. D’you wanna talk about it?” His voice is warm and mellow and oh so inviting. And you very nearly give in.
But you can’t pull him into your problems. It’s not his burden to bear.
“Not really. But thanks, Dong-In.”
“That’s cool.” He nods, and relief fills you. This is what you’ve always liked about Dong-In. He’s chill. “Well since we’re here, wanna get buzzed?”
You laugh. “I won’t say no to that.”
The bar isn’t too far from where you are, and it doesn’t take long before the burn of alcohol is sliding down your throat. Picking up the conversation again, you have to admit, you’d forgotten how easy it is to talk to Dong-In. He’s got that effortless charisma and an easy sense of humor that you can vibe with. Things are simple with him. There’s no line to be tiptoed. Flirting - now that you’re no longer obtuse and you’re finally aware that he is indeed flirting with you - isn’t accompanied by guilt or fear.
And after weeks of this complicated situation with Namjoon, simplicity is what you crave.
“Hey, do you wanna dance?” you ask suddenly. Surprise colors his features for a moment but he laughs it off.
“Is the conversation boring you? You could have just told me to shut up if you wanted me to,” he jokes.
“No!” You laugh. “There’s just a good beat going and-”
“I’m just kidding. I’d love to.” He smiles and grabs your hand.
The two of you weave your way through the mass of gyrating bodies. Lightly buzzed, the fog and the strobe lights blurring everything around you other than your dance partner, you finally find the courage you’ve been searching for this whole time. Dong-In hasn’t been very subtle about checking you out all night, and it gives you that extra boost of confidence that’s finally quelled the antsy thoughts and calmed the fidgety adjustments to your dress’s hemline.
So when his hands find your waist, you step in a little closer and run your hands through your hair, shaking it out and finally letting loose as your hips rock to the pounding beat. Dancing with Dong-In is much like conversing with him- easy and simple fun with just the slightest tinge of excitement. As your hips sway together in languid synchrony, you catch a whiff of the slightly intoxicating combination of his cologne and the undertones of his own natural scent. You give in to the giddying sensation of his hands running lightly over your body and press in closer, eyes fluttering shut, and just feeling. It’s thrilling. It’s risque. It’s-
A solid grip on your wrist yanks you forward and stumbling into a hard chest.
His voice is gruff as he bites out his words, “Get your hands off her.”
“Namjoon?” you gape.
“We’re leaving.” His eyes fix on yours, steely and piercing. A shiver runs down your spine - in all your years of knowing him, you’ve never seen him like this. He tugs on your wrist once more. “Now.”
Dazed by this brand new persona, you don’t even get to say goodbye to Dong-In, just pulled along by the force that is a quietly fuming Namjoon. Everything happens so quickly that it’s all a blur until you’re in the Uber with him, silently clutching onto your purse as an anchor in this sudden whirlwind of events. The anger emanates off of him even in the dimly lit backseat.
“What the fuck?” you whisper, but the shock diminishes the level of conviction in your voice.
He turns to you, the same hardness still in his gaze. “I should be the one asking that.”
“What?!” you snap. In your peripheral vision, you see the Uber driver jump slightly. Lowering your tone, you hiss, “What gives you the right?”
“What gives me the right?” he echoes incredulously, scoffing and turning away from you to face forward instead as he rolls his eyes. “This is ridiculous.”
The car slows to a stop and you recognize your apartment building. You scramble to get away from him. But it seems your confrontation is far from over. Namjoon unbuckles his own seatbelt to follow you.
Terse silence sits between you, the aggravated stomping of your feet as you climb the stairs the only thing that fills the sound.
You turn sharply round the corner, stalking off to your apartment door. “You don’t have to escort me y’know, I’m perfectly capable of getting home by myself.”
“Really?” He folds his arms and leans on the wall next to your door. “It’s hard to trust you when you go off getting drunk and throwing yourself at a random stranger in the club.”
“Is that what the problem is?” You finally ram the key in, and the click as it unlocks is as harsh as your tone. “Sorry to break it to you, but I have a life apart from you. He’s no stranger. His name is Dong-In, he’s Yeri’s friend, and he’s a great guy.”
You shove the door open. Your heels get kicked off and left haphazardly at the entryway, shoe cabinet ignored.
“Wow, some great guy he is,” Namjoon slams the door shut and his shoes get discarded off his feet in the same fashion, “drunkenly feeling you up in a club.”
“Fuck!” You turn, wringing your hands in your hair. Your glares rival each other. “You say it as if I was strung along by him. Well I wasn’t. I initiated it.”
His glare flickers for a moment. He stays silent.
“Just admit that you’re jealous,” you whisper. You unsling your purse and dump it on top of the shoe cabinet, never breaking eye contact.
“Fine.” Namjoon’s gaze doesn’t waver. “I am.”
He skulks forward and traps you between him and the cabinet, gaze holding yours. Namjoon’s always towered over you, but at the moment it isn’t his height that makes you feel tiny.
“Watching his hands all over you like this,” Namjoon’s hands slowly skim the back of your thighs and up your sides and you bite back a whimper, “makes me jealous.”
“And watching you respond like this?” He continues as a firm hand presses the small of your back to close the gap between your torsos. “Glued to him like this? It makes me jealous.”
“You don’t own me,” you whisper but it only elicits a sardonic laugh from him.
“You say that, but you know damn well that’s not the truth. Tell me. Are you jealous?”
“What would I-”
“Yeri.” Damn. Straight through the bullshit. With an eyebrow cocked, it’s obvious he knows the answer and he’s not budging, not even an inch.
“Yes,” you admit quietly. “I’m jealous.”
“Silly girl.” He traces the hemline of your dress. “I only want you.”
A soft keening noise spills out of you. “I’m so sick of holding back.” You tug on his dress shirt, and the feel of his plush lips finally, finally meeting yours snips the final frayed cords of self-restraint you possessed.
Namjoon is quick to reciprocate, and you moan as his tongue licks at your bottom lip. Hooking your arms around his neck, you pull him closer, needing nothing else but to have him close after all this time of distance. He hoists you up, and your legs circle his waist to aid him. The world around you sets into motion as he walks you to your bed, and you anchor yourself by pressing kisses to his neck.
With how tiny your apartment is, it takes no time for him to carry you from the entryway to your bedroom. The cool sensation of your unmade sheets envelops you as he lowers you down onto the bed. He barely gets a moment to appreciate the sight of you, hair mussed and lipstick smudged, lounging on the bed and waiting for him. Desperate for his touch and running out of patience, you gesture to the zip on the side of your dress. Hurrying, he pulls the zipper down as you tug your arms out of the thin straps of the garment. You sit up and let the torso of the dress fall to bunch up at your waist, revealing your bare chest to him.
The quiet gasp that escapes him as he beholds you is infinitely flattering. It’s but a momentary pause. He dives forward into action again. An arm looped around your back to support you as your chest arches upwards, he crouches over you to take one perked-up tit into the heat of his mouth, his free hand coming up to toy with the other. His tongue laves over your nipple in a slippery flick. The other gets pinched and rolled, leaving you gasping at the delicious sensations.
“Namjoon,” you moan out breathily, and it only eggs him on. You whimper as he begins sucking on the bud and wetness pools between your thighs. Your fingernails rake down his back, muted through the layer of his dress shirt.
“M-more,” you plead. He releases your breast and moves his mouth upwards, trailing gentle pecks till he kisses along the length of your collarbone.
“Come here,” he commands, his words breathy and hot as they puff against the thin skin of your clavicle. He scoots back to lean against the headboard, and you follow hastily.
You clamber on top of him, knees bent and straddling his lap as he helps you hike the skirt of your dress up. But before you seat yourself atop the prominent bulge in the lightwash denim of his jeans, he holds you still with a firm grasp on your hip.
His thumb trails the lace detail of your panties, the patterns snaking across your hip bone, baby pink like your dress.
“Gorgeous,” he mumbles. His fingers wander to your clothed core, the material slightly sheer from the damp spot of your arousal. He strokes it tenderly with the pad of his finger, so light that it has you quivering as you hover above him.
His fingernail grazes your slit through the wet material and a gasp catches in your throat. You clench around nothing as carnal desire throbs through your core.
“Namjoon, please,” you whine.
Finally, he gives in to you and pulls you down. Your laced core meets his rough denim-clad one. The stiff material of his jeans pokes through the delicate fabric of your underwear, the friction rough as he drags you over his clothed bulge. The burn is delicious. His hands on you set a slow but steady rhythm that you follow easily, canting your hips in time. It’s enrapturing to watch the way you grind on one another, your clit rubbing up on the apex of his bulge in mutual pleasure.
A finger tips your chin up from the sight you were fixated on.
“Eyes on me.”
It’s difficult. Pleasure has your eyes drooping shut. But the intensity of his gaze compellingly holds yours and you manage, even if barely. His expression is stoic, and it’s only the twitch of his dick that betrays how affected he is. You, on the other hand, are completely abandoned to pleasure. Hands scrabbling across his upper back and up until they settle themselves as fists gripping tufts of his hair, teeth clamped on your bottom lip as moans spill out of you at increasing frequency as your pleasure climbs and climbs and climbs until-
Burrowing your face into the side of his neck, you pant as you cross the peak. Hips now stilled, your climax has you throbbing against his hardened member. You cling onto him with your arms around his neck as you free-fall in the subsiding pleasure. Bare chest brushing against the smooth material of his dress shirt, you catch your breath and yield to the moment.
“Shit,” he mutters. “Shit.” Louder this time. “Shit, shit, shit.”
The regret in his words yank you out of the heady fog of lust. There’s no time to bask in the afterglow. Reality comes crashing down hard and mercilessly.
Suddenly, you feel so small and so exposed. You read his regret as rejection. Your nudity and previous salacious actions make you feel stupid.
Namjoon attempts to extricate your arms from around him, but shame has you clutching to him tighter, hiding your face in his neck. You can still feel him under you, but it’s now an uncomfortable reminder of the act you just committed.
“Hey,” his voice is gentle now, pleading, “look at me? Please?”
You refuse. It’s impossible to look him in the eye right now.
“Fuck.” Even whispered, the panic laced in his tone is blatant. Gently, he maneuvers both of you to turn over. Feeling the mattress underneath you as you’re laid on your back, you release your hold on him and swiftly turn and tug your blanket up to hide away from him.
“____.” He tries. You grip the sheets even tighter as you feel him trying to pull it away from your face. “Please.”
Embarrassment. Guilt. Mortification. They overtake you and you curl in on yourself. You just want to disappear.
“____,” he tries again, hand stroking your head. But you don’t allow yourself to succumb to its comfort. “Talk to me. Please.”
Oh, now he wants to talk.
Why couldn’t you have just talked things out earlier? Why only now when things have fallen apart? Why now when you’ve just done something so stupid and so reckless?
Why now when it’s too late? What can talking possibly do to fix this now?
His pleas are met with silence.
“I’m gonna get you some water,” he says resignedly.
More silence. He sighs. You feel the mattress shift as he gets up. From where you’re still hiding in the stuffy darkness underneath your blanket, you hear his footsteps return and the muted thud of the glass getting placed on your bedside table.
The silence returns, but you can feel his presence. You imagine he’s staring at your blanket lump on the bed.
Finally, the heavy quietness is broken with a deep breath, and you hear him say softly, “Get a good night’s rest, okay? Let’s talk about this tomorrow.”
The light clicks off and you’re plunged into lonely pitch-black darkness. In the distance, you hear the heavy opening and closing of your front door as Namjoon leaves.
Unearthing yourself to the coolness of the night, your dress an uncomfortable lump around your waist, your breasts slightly sore from his previous ministrations, you stare up at the ceiling as hot tears leak out.
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It’s well into the afternoon by the time you drag yourself out of bed the next day. Sleep came intermittently and was far from restful, but waking up meant facing the nightmarish reality of what had transpired. So you hid under the covers for as long as you could. But you know you can’t stay there forever.
The buzzing notifications of your phone had woken you up on more than one occasion in the night. But you ignore it and leave your phone next to the glass of water - still untouched - in favor of washing up. It’s more pressing anyway, you surmise. You can feel your make-up, now icky and caked on your face. It’s awful. Your skin is probably revolting against you now and you don’t even want to think about the mess it probably left on your pillowcase. But last night, you were simply paralyzed by the weight of what you’d done, crying till sleep finally came for you.
You take your time going through an extensive skincare routine, even busting out the clay mask you had impulsively bought together with Yeri when it was on discount. You’re doing it because your skin needs the pampering and definitely not because you’re procrastinating getting to your phone.
But there’s only so many steps you can do with the limited skincare products in your apartment. And you know your friends are probably worried about your abrupt disappearance last night. Getting to those messages first, you quickly assure Soo-eun and Yeri that you’re safe at home. Looking at the remaining notifications, you sigh.
Missed calls Namjoon (8)
7 unread messages from 2 chats Namjoon: are you still sleeping? Namjoon: hey, you still asleep? Namjoon: text me when you’re up please? Namjoon: are you awake?
Dong-In: hey! Dong-In: not sure what exactly happened at the end there haha, but it was rly great seeing u again. Dong-In: i’m still waiting on that brunch reschedule, by the way.
Memories from last night come back to you. Dong-In runs his hands through his curls, an easy grin on his face as he leans in to listen to you over the loud music of the club. Things are simple with Dong-In. And, standing on the precipice of a mental spiral whenever you think of Namjoon, the same craving for simplicity from last night returns.
[2:06pm] ____: well it’s a little late for brunch right now
[2:06pm] ____: but you still up to grab a bite?
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guideaus · 2 years
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i finished Trigun: Badlands Rumble. heres me thoughts:
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vash was a cuite patootie. BUT i think him in the movie was the first time he really annoyed me though with his principles, i feel like it was the most direct example of him preventing someone from dying, then said person going nuts and trying to fuck an entire town over, as opposed to in the anime it could usually be more blamed on legato/knvies forcing things. i think his quick “death” was real silly and i think it was impossible to even think he might’ve, while somehow spike in cowboy bebop’s movie felt like he actually could've died. i think he was fine when wolfwood stepped in, but then also inexplicably displays his post-anime development (which i was fine w, just bc otherwise its annoying, as i said lol). vash playing as a womanizer was really annoying, though, even if I know its a part of his performative attitude to cope. With men, he acts like an idiot, and with women he plays flirty, which kinda translates to making sexual harassment a joke (especially when amelia here literally has a condition that harms her).
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when the movie first started I felt like amelia was kinda just like elektra in cowboy bebop’s movie, like some au fanfic insert dedicated to the movie, which kinda is true, but somehow with just all that has been shown in the show, she is at least more interesting than millie and meryl. her being there also made me think vash needs more close, reoccurring, friends besides the insurance ladies (who say they only follow for their job) and wolfwood (who dies). that end kinda plot twist thing abt the villain as her father, was kinda unexpected, but again its something, lol. the movie was weird with her, though, showing her focus on revenge towards... whatever the villain’s name was as being just like him or selfish when it was valid imo, lol. her going to steal the prized treasure before dealing w him also felt like a silly moment dedicated for vash to dramatically come back. vash’s pacifism in the movie also robbed her of a lot of action she could've done, until she partnered with wolfwood.
loved wolfwood being in the move, i was honestly very scared he was gonna be there and not know vash yet, or even not be in the movie at all, but he was fine :) i do think that his involvement into the movie felt a little forced, as opposed to in the anime he just kinda happened to be where vash was, which felt more natural than this lol (and him helping the antagonists kinda backs up that “wolfwood was a bad guy who used orphans as an excuse” thing i’ve seen some people say, which i dont agree with. i think he was on the bad side temporarily just for a quick scene like vash and him fighting, which isnt too bad, lol. i’m glad he wasn't also being as ridiculous as vash was to amelia. i have no clue why he wore vash’s glasses, but i loved that, some real shounen protags shit. i love him and would absolutely love to pretend he didn't die.
the villain was weird and i didnt feel anything towards him at all, his burglary creed was weird, like some sort of low honor arthur morgan fuck-up, he didnt make me hate or love him, he was just there. milly and meryl also... were there, just about the same level of involvement in the anime, except at least they were never hostages, i suppose. amelia absolutely could've replaced them as the female rep or whatever, lmao. 
i think the movie looked nice, and im glad it didn't deviate too much from the original style. i think it reminds me of hunterxhunter’s original and anime reboot comparison, though with the modern anime, it did feel much duller (and either darker or brighter??), but i guess that’s inevitable. i also hate the flashback scenes they let look like this:
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anyways it was a cute little side-story movie thing, i could watch and see how vash dealt with the antagonist in the end and not be too unsatisfied, and i can pretend wolfwood still lives, lol. it was definitely better than that one filler ep in the anime. and in my heart, i’d also love a reboot of the anime.
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lumiereswig · 5 years
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Do you have any crossovers with/AUs inspired by "Moulin Rouge!"? I know there's a fics list page but my wifi is so stupid slow it never loads so I can never tell.
nope! srry
since u can’t load the fics page im gonna give it all to you right here boo
Lumiere discovers something new, post-curse: Matches
Plumette/Lumiere, pre-curse. Plumette growing up and Lumiere growing close. Lit By The Sun
Plumette/Lumiere, immediately after being cursed: Fire and Feathers
Lumiere meets the prince for the first time: A Showman Through and Through
Plumette/Lumiere as college kids: Modern AU that is not super great but eh i tried
plumiere in love: it’s right here for now (at least until I edit it and make it better)
here’s Scotland
“a maid that has a crush on Lumiere faking being Plumette and trying to seduce him”: hahaha this one still makes me laugh
abandoned ‘kidnapped’ fic—here
lumiere finding out plumette is pregnant: Here.
lumiere sees the baby for the first time:  Here. Aww.
“a one shot in which plumette and lumiere go on a romantic tryst about the castle in the days following their wedding 💕”:  poor cogsworth
Lumiere is the sexiest sandwich in the palace. Here.
Plumette gets sick, it’s really sad: Right over here, pal.
More plumiere falling in love here.
Tale as old as time, older than that guy, Beauty and Maurice.
garderenza backstory? here it is
So, like: what if Mulan showed up.
“can i please have a crack-shippy fic where everybody is in love with the wrong people.” Here.
figuring out how to be human again. here
lumiere/plumette body swap HERE.
“Movie night at the castle!” As you wish.
a bunch of other maids have a crush on lumiere and try to get his attention: a short fic about trapezes
“A group of poor motherless ducklings imprint on Plumette” QUACK QUACK.
“please expand on that night when Plumette and co. got drunk because of Chapeau’s brandy + wine idea…” I don’t know why I like writing drunk!staff so much but i DO
1991, MEET 2017!
What happened to Gaston? The only Gaston fic I’ll ever write, probably. Here.
He is nineteen. She is younger. Lumiere tells Plumette a fairytale. Lit by the Moon.
“How about a fic were the staff play light as a feather stiff as a board with Plumette as the board.“ what the fuck even is this game i am still confused but on y va, i guess
ATTRACTIVE FARMER MAN AND HIS TWO WIVES
Plumette’s last seconds before the curse takes hold. Laughing Still.
Forgotten. [Ongoing]
Plumiere in the rain. Quick mini-fic. I’ve Seen Fire and Rain
“quick question : how often does lumiere get sick?” Here.
“What if the day the curse was broken the staff go batshit crazy over being able to eat again so they eat until their stomachs hurt. Then Chip starts a food fight by throwing a bread roll at Cogsworth.” THIS HAPPENED?
“A dragon comes to try and eat Plumette” Lumiere is a fire-bender
“crack fic where they somehow discover theyre fictional” this one was so fun to write, lumiere picks up ewan’s scottish accent and hates it
“What about a really cute fic were Lumiere and Plumette fake being sick so they don’t have to work and get to spend the whole day together” poor cogsworth part 2  
“Who gets the weird nightmares and who consoles the other at two in the morning because they’re in tears.” Me, because I just want my OTP to have nice things. Here.
”coffeeshop au but its still set in the 18th century“ BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ROUSSEAU, THO??            
“Can you write about Lumiere throwing Plumette a surprise birthday party for her?”  hey
“Chip wants to be maître d’ someday and follows Lumière around the castle as his little protégé” he’s going to be a better one than lumiere here
“don’t think about how painful the transformation must have been for the servants" do i ever think of anything else. [the answer is no]                
“*Whispers in your ear* AMNESIAC LUMIERE”   FUCK. HOW’D YOU KNOW I LOVE AMNESIA FICS?? FUCK. ultimately one of my favorite fics. holy fuck
“*Whispers in your ear* AMNESIAC LUMIERE” part TWO, motherfuckers
“Maybe one during the curse where they can suddenly hear the soundtrack around them?“ poor cadenza
“What if somebody after the curse was broken just out of nowhere started playing the Aria. I NEED FEELS” have you thought about horrible things yet today  
“The castle has to order in pizza” adam would like to register a complaint.
“Ewan McGregor and Lumiere switching universes" here
”A water balloon fight that gets out of hand?“ SPLASH.    
Les Miserabeauty and the Beast. Here.
“Can you do where everyone is turn into a baby” ANGST
STANFOU ROMANCE
“Nutcracker AU?!” aw fuck here
“I Never Really Knew You”—Cadenza & Adam
“He Must Loathe Me”—Chapeau & Plumette
“The Sound of Her Weeping”—Garderobe & Lumiere
“Her Little Satin Slippers”—Cogsworth & Plumette
“Home”—Mrs. Potts & Plumette
“Chapeau’s Charade”—Belle & Chapeau
“Lullaby”—Garderobe & Plumette
“Cake in the Sun”—Lumiere & Stanley
“Like You Used To”—Adam & Garderobe
“Why The Beast Eats Like….That”—Chip & The Beast
“The Boy’s Hand”—Chip & Adam
“The Pink Vest”—Garderobe & Cogsworth
“Draw”—Maurice & Adam
“They’ll Never Meet Again”—Plumette & Garderobe.
“Her Beautiful Maman”—Garderobe & Plumette, in the parents AU. Also: Lumiere & Frou-Frou. Woof.
“have Belle and Adam watch batb 2017?” sure.  
“I would love to see their reaction to singing in the rain! It’s my all time favorite movies!! ❤️❤️"  🌧🌧🌧🌧SAME 🌧🌧🌧🌧
“consider the coconut” MOANA CRACK.
“Plumiere goes to Paris?” Prequel fic! [oh là là]
“thy crackest crack of all - batb but adam/belle and lumiere/plumette swap places” lumiere turns into a dragon
“so. um. amnesiac adam?“ FUCK. FUCK.FUCK.              
”Mary Poppins would be practically perfect in every way!” Feed the fucking birds
“I should have told you a long time ago.” Plumette wakes up, after their first night together. Fits into the “Lit by the Sun” story.
“This is why we can’t have nice things/you don’t see me”—right after the curse, Plumiere cope with their new forms. Angst?
“Prove It/You’re Drunk.” Lumiere had….a night of it. Poor Cogsworth, the Continuing Saga
“great comet” fic: the candle in the mirror
“I’ve been waiting a long time.” finally a happy!cogsworth fic. Tic toc.
“Batb and Frozen crossover pls“—it’s garbage                          
The whole palace body swaps. here
“What happens when Lumiere’s family wakes up and realizes they have a son at the palace?” well SHIT ! there’s a prompt
“Chapeau having to relearn and figure out how to play the violin once he’s turned into a coatrack.” Shh.
a cuisinier fic! this fandom doesn’t deserve him
“Batb and Robin Hood crossover!!!!!” fuck
“how about the castle residents plays a giant game of live clue.” Adam would like to register another complaint
Lit by the Stars. Plumette and Lumiere meet for the first time.
“belle catches a cold?” i’m allergic to fluff
“how about amnesiac belle this time?” FUCK
w o w this one’s about plumette & belle sharing plague stories
“Can you do where Lumiere and Plumette babysit Chip while Mrs. Potts is working”  cute? ??
Wedding Cake: it’s huge
“lightly read fanfiction.” RIGHT?!
“You should let them watch the classic movie Beauty and the Beast” here
“ plumette x lumière modern spies AU” here.
“cogsworth angst” YOU GOT IT dude
“Hi, could you do some fluff and angst headcanons for Madame de Garderobe and Cadenza please xx” the honeymooners
“Shalalalalala my oh my, looks like the boy’s too shy, ain’t gonna kiss the girl” has lumiere ever been shy in his life ?
“Would you care to write a drabble of the castle redoing Mrs. and Mr. Potts’s wedding because Chip found his mother’s wedding dress and was bummed that he missed it?“ oh hey unrelated: i never dated a christmas ornament  
“imagine plumiere first met AFTER they were turned into objects” um: FUCK YES.
“Batb characters in the titanic” too soon, people. too soon.
“Plumiere prompt: A whole new world! new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no. Or where to go. Or say we’re only dreaming.” ok    
“a touring theatre group comes to perform at the castle” this is more like a headcanon but it’s long as fuck so it ended up here              
“cogsworth discovers he can fly” this is so wrong, this is so right              
“Card Tricks”—Lumiere & Chip
“Coffee & Tea”—Lefou & Mrs. Potts
“Lion’s Mane”—Cuisiner & Plumette & Adam
“the characters read some of your fics and their reactions” o fuck. crack.
“Ok, but what about someone slipping Lumiere a love potion meant for Plumette??” kisses
Plumette stargazes; Lumiere dates someone else. Veronique
“ding dong we need more cogsworth- can we have something with him and mrs. potts bonding over all of their dumb kids” ding dong yes yes yes we do!
the villagers get cursed. a trash fic!!!![[[[ongoing]]]
Seating Arrangementsare! important! here.
“cogsworth sharing plumette’s first dance with her at her wedding, and…” I don’t dance.
poly garderenza/belle. i love this bullshit. i ship this
“Bonjour you wrote a fic about Luimere taking care of Plumette when she’s sick, can you write one about Plumette taking care of Lumiere? 💛💛” cough!
The First Untethered Hot Air Balloon Flight: oh, fuck.
garderenza content FEELS
“amnesiac belle?” COMPLETED, BITCHES. fucking ga w w d
“Can we have cogsworth headcanons?? Pretty please mon ami??” Dulce et decorum est.  
“Eclipse”—Lumiere & Chip
what if the servants came awake again, in modern days? Here
‘do you remember when we were human?’ Plumiere shit.
A history lesson w/Cogs and Lums. Beware the dust. Album.
 GARDERENZA HIGH SCHOOL AU !!!
“Woof”— Belle & Frou-Frou
“Fireworks”—Adam & Plumette
“Amnesiac Mrs. Potts?” Eh.
“a midsummer night’s dream au?” welcome to CRACK CITY [x]
“Plumette has a tragic, existential moment.” Pouf-pouf.
“a touring theatre group comes to perform at the castle. like some kind of magic, they can perform shows that don’t even exist yet” [x]
“I would ​ love if you wrote when Plumette and Lumiere came up with Be Our Guest” BE! OUR! GUEST
“The castle adopts a pet? but not like a cat or anything, like they get a pet komodo dragon or something” welcome to the zoo
garderenza’s glory [x]
“Flicker In, Flicker Out.” The curse takes its toll.
“Who would be into divination? the Supernatural? Spooky Shit™?” HEY THERE DEMONS, IT’S YA BOI.
“If each of the servants could write a book, what would they be about?” The Villeneuve Catalog of Literature, fresh off the presses.  [x]
“Cogsworth + Lumiere switch personalities?”  i fuckin love a good crack prompt. showgirls!
“Socks”—Pere Robert & Mrs. Potts
adam and belle meet as tiny kids
COLLEGE FACULTY AU FIC 
sad maurice fic: :)))))))))
“What do the servants do when they can’t sleep?” Shhhh.
Chip being in town when the curse strikes, here [ongoing!]
Belle gets used to the staff being, well.….human again. “New.”
“Have you ever done a role-swap where Belle was the princess and Adam was the boy from the village?“ CHIP. DON’T FUCK WITH THE TIME TRAVEL. Here.
The useless energy of haunted things. “Freaks of Furniture.” Thanks, JSTOR.
@batbobsession​ collab w/me called “One Moment”—their part is here, my part is there. The servants and the staff take a minute, right before the battle, to face what they’ve become.
“spooky prompt: What If the castle was haunted the year after belle breaks the spell…sadder prompt: What If the ghost was Adams mom…Worse prompt: or his father” THIS IS NOT THE FUN GHOST-HUNTING I ASKED FOR.
“Everyone says that Adam was under the spell ages, so what if the spell went on for 300+ years or whatever, and a woman hiking through the woods kind of went through what Maurice did with the tree being knocked over…” Fucking!!!! Granola bars!!!!!!!!!!!![x] [Ongoing.]  
How desperate I became. To erase. To unmake my mouth, my pulse. / To unlive. “The Writing-Desk.”
“So Very Different”—Cuisinier & Garderobe
“how would the staff and Belle and Adam react to some little kids from the village showing up trick-or-treating?“ Something like this, I imagine.
“Amnesiac Cadenza?” i do fucking love an amnesia ask
“During the curse, Adam begins to see ghostly apparitions of the servants’ human forms.” Dead men walking.
“Spooky prompt: A haunted house in Villeneuve.” i just want to talk to the demons!
“These Two Need More Love”—Chapeau & Cuisinier
“A piece inspired by the song, “A Shoulder to Cry On,” aka, ‘80S MUSIC FICS
“Adam, Belle + staff go to pick out/chop down their own Christmas tree……” Yule fic by me + other people! ho ho ho.
way down in hadestown
The fandom-spanning fic, involving Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Doctor Who, and Tulio and Miguel.
“Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said.” Evermore. Thanks Ray Bradbury.
“idk how she got there but Garderobe rules the world.” ❤️
“Oh! How about a story or headcannons of Shane and Ryan doing a Buzzfeed Unsolved Video at the enchanted castle in BatB?” [wheeze] (a FAVE)
“Words”—Garderobe & LeFou.
“what if someone confused the servants with the royals, cuz they dress better than adam and belle?” This happens regularly.
“Pere Robert somehow comes across a Time Turner” ⏳tick-tock⌛️
“Crackfic prompt: Belle is messing around with magic books (AGAIN) and somehow summons dinosaurs.” that’s , uh, that’s chaos theory
plumiere SNUGGLING FOR WARMTH TROPE????
“The BATB characters stumble into The Great Comet” EVERYBODY RAISE A GLASS
“So I’m reading the Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater…..” Here.
“Please give me more singing hair brush!” the fucking hairbrush. Here.
“Please can I have a bunch of adorable hcs where Garderenza are prepping Bassette for their first concert with her singing in it too” that is a hairbrush
arrrrGGHHHH, mateys, that thar be a magical pirates fic, shiver me timbers
“lumiere gets a sunburn” ouCh
“for adelle: maybe the Official Proposal?” Here.
“ what if. an amnesia fic. where they. ALL. Got. A m n e s I a“ —MY BRAND~
“Headcanons for Belle and Adam being the world’s greatest grandparents?” also known as “be a bear, grandpa!”
“Garderenza prompt: ‘You saved my life!’” oh how divine
belle keeps playing with magic and getting everybody fucked
this collab fic with @theteaisaddictive​ is done! “agathe gets amnesia”
“Whisky and Red Wine”—Lumiere and Belle have a night in.
“AU idea: As belle is leaving the second time, something stops her and she turns and whispers ‘I love you’ before running off.” Can you say “two idiots”?
“ have you ever done any asks about what you think maurice/belle’s mum’s life was like before they had belle???” I AM ALWAYS HERE FOR THE MAURICE SAD!FICS [x]
“something sweet with adam and the plumiere child.” sweet as stolen breakfasts.
“Belle messing with magic again finds one that puts the universe into reverse” this one is straight crack i hope you like it
chip is the middle man for some major lumiworth action
“A traveller stops by for directions […] by coincidence, he’s one of Belle’s *very favorite* authors.” Wow I wonder if the world’s biggest book nerd is going to handle this in a responsible manner [x]
“a man attending a ball at the palace spots plumette, and falls in love with her beauty. she receives an anonymous present of heart-shaped chocolates on her bedside the next day, and assuming they are a present from her dear lover, eats them without a thought. moments later…..” Not exactly this trope but uhhhh it’s a love potion fic babyyyyyyy
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queerbycrs · 6 years
Note
i aint scared you gotta do 1-30
IM READY
favorite fic you wrote this yearalive (star wars, barrissoka) because 1. finally did something in second person that i liked!!! and 2. i feel like it was just. Good. i liked the way i did it.
least favorite fic you wrote this yearprobably To Be Found (star wars, obianidala) because it’s a genre that i don’t usually work with (action) + i did it for an exchange and didn’t give myself very much time to do it so i was super rushed and freaked out and yeah. it’s not terrible or anything but i just feel like *sigh* when i think about it
favorite line/scene you wrote this yearthis tiny scene from and this is how it goes (stranger things, stoncy)
It goes like this.Steve punches Jonathan in the face behind the school during lunch. And while Jonathan is still recovering from the blow, a hell of a bruise rising under his left eye and blood running out of his nose, Steve kisses him. Steve is the only solid thing in the world; everything else is tilting.This kiss tastes like blood.Steve pushes him away moments later, mouth slick and red, and spits on the ground, wiping off Jonathan’s blood. “I’m not a fucking queer,” he says, and leaves Jonathan alone. In the distance, the normal high school break-time sounds are coming back into focus. They’d disappeared when the bloodlust, or maybe just lust, appeared in Steve’s eyes.Jonathan licks the blood off his teeth and leans back against the brick wall, pressing his palms flat against it. It’s cold and rough against his fingers.It doesn’t feel as real as Steve did when his tongue was in Jonathan’s mouth, but it’s close.
...because i like blood as an aesthetic and i just. really liked this. (#homophobia #blood #violence #assault)
total number of words you wrote this year...i have to go with “published” because otherwise i have genuinely no idea. 43,710. huh! not bad.
most popular fic this yearcompleted this year? and this is how it goes, 156 kudos.
least popular fic this yearsympathy for the devil (star wars, hanleia/sith!leia, dark) with 12 kudos, but i also published it three days ago, so.
longest completed fic you wrote this yearTo Be Found, 7,163 words.
shortest completed fic you wrote this yearno rest for the wicked (young justice, snaibsel), 804 words.
longest wip of the yearLights Will Guide You Home (32.8k right now) which is the first fic i uploaded on that account! and it’s still a wip. sigh. (star wars, mostly plotty/action but with obianidala + skybridger + barrissoka)
shortest wip of the yearsee above. i have one (1) wip because i know now that i cannot finish them in good time and won’t do that to myself again.
fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year...i think it’s still star wars. though i had a good time with stranger things, with one fic up and one that’s still in progress on and off
favorite character to write about this year...i don’t know. i will say i wrote more original trilogy fic than i thought i would, so more luke + leia + han, and i really enjoyed it.
favorite writing song/artist/album of this yearuhhhhhhhhh idk i don’t really Do writing music for a lot of surprisingly weird reasons.
a fic you didn’t expect to writechasing a memory (young justice, snaibsel) was a bit of a surprise, because it has a plot and it stayed relatively short while i also found it fascinating. also i’m super proud of it, it’s definitely up there with my favourites of this year
something you learned this yearWIPS ARE NOT SOMETHING I CAN DO.also i’m figuring out more of what my strengths are as a writer and where i feel comfortable, and i’m trying to push them a bit.
fic(s) you completed this yeara list, are we doing that?
chasing a memory
alive
slip away into the sound (star wars, hanleia, han dies earlier and leia doesn’t cope)
you know what they say about assumptions (star wars, obianidala, modern/celebrity au)
no rest for the wicked
and this is how it goes
To Be Found
take to the sky with me (star wars, skysolo, royalty au)
sympathy for the devil
fics you’ll continue next yearstill just the one wip. and hopefully i’ll finish it.
current number of wipsone!
any new fics to start next yearno wips (i’ve learned my lesson) but i have some ideas
number of comments you haven’t readnone, i think?
most memorable comment/reviewuhhhhh i’m not sure WAIT SOMEONE OFFERED TO PODFIC ONE OF MY FICS WHICH. I JUST. I DIED. THAT WAS AMAZING.
events you participated in this yearsw rare pairs exchange and skysolo secret santa. and they were fun but also i don’t think i can do any more exchanges until i graduate, considering how severely my current school situation limits my computer access.
fics you wanted to write but didn’tcan i take this as “wanted to finish” because i usually at least start writing things? i really wish i could’ve gotten somewhere with my barrissoka hanahaki au. i still might write it but it’s kinda stuck and idk
favorite fic you read this yearOH LORDIE.uh.whole yeari’m just gonna. take a pass on this one because i genuinely read hundreds of fics this year and it would take all night to narrow them down
a fic you read this year you would recommend everyone readSee Above
number of favorites/bookmarks you made this year501. DO YOU SEE WHY I CAN’T NARROW THIS DOWN ON SUCH A SHORT BASIS.
favorite fanfic author of the yearstill genuinely could not say. i loved a lot of them.
longest fic you read this yearfirst reads? hm. okay -- ao3, just go on and nOT LET ME SEARCH MY BOOKMARKS BY WORDCOUNT, THANKS FOR THAT. can’t tell you; again, 501 BOOKMARKS.i might be able to figure this out if my computer let me sort files by download date but it doesn’t. so.
shortest fic you read this yearsee above. shit.
favorite fandom to read fic from this yearhonestly? i have to say, a lot of them. like, i’d say “diversity in reading” was the theme of the year. i read so many different fandoms. but i think i really loved my brief delves into all for the game and percy jackson and it.
i’d say ask me more but this was all of them so thank you
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vampire-core · 7 years
Note
/post/161320161315 every single Fucking cmnc character. every single one. trust me dude (if u want!!!)
fucken hell yeah hyperfixation time
FRANCES
A: what I think realistically
tbh frances seems like the type of person where playin the piano is like. a coping mechanism for her?? like if shes stressed/angry/havin a Bad Time she either
a: plays a Sad Tune to angst
b: plays something AGGRESSIVE to get her anger out
c, a rare option: plays smth happy to take her mind off it
bc she seems like the person to Wallow in her own sadness tbh im guessin c is Rare but
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
frances wears horribly fucking clashing colors like. bright neon orange and the ugliest brown-green mixed and goes out like that in sunglasses
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
frances didnt have a good home and she got with junior to get Out of it and then he turned out to be a piece of shit and her life just spiraled Down
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
shes an agender lesbian with three gfs
HENRY
A: what I think realistically
tbh henry totally seems like hed learn to bake for nancy like. i know hes in-canon a horrible cook but like. imagine this sweetie taking secret baking lessons for like Forever and then he surprises nancy on her bday with like. a rlly nice homemade cake and they cry together :’)
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
henry is a clumsy-ass Shit so he breaks things like 384723897423894x and once he managed to break a vase nancy Really liked and she walked in on him Coated in glue and just. “what are you doing” “no nothing what nothing is broken” “henry the vases shards and glue are both everywhere” “everything is fine nancy”
also nancy being at the store and henry seeing a spider and screaming on the counter until she got home
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
henry living with the eternal guilt over taking the “wrong” choice even though there was no good choice because he either stayed in a place where no issues were being worked out or he left :^)
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
hes a trans bABY AND I LOVE HIM SO FUCKIN MUCH
NANCY
A: what I think realistically
tbh i can imagine her bein in a book club but being the Shy One who never talks during meetings
also i can imagine her learning to paint and Loving It and showing henry the paintings which show what her world is like and hes like “:00!!!”
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
NANCY SPRITING AROUND IN HIGH HEELS TRYING TO CRUSH A SPIDER WHILE SHE AND HENRY BOTH FUCKING SOB BECAUSE SHE CANT MANAGE TO KILL THE SPIDER
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
nancy living with crushing guilt and abandonment issues but hiding it because she doesnt want to bother henry and she keeps randomly crying :)))
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
shes genderfluid as FUCK and has a gf
BONUS: JUNIOR
A: what I think realistically
tbh this dude is fuckin Shitty and hes def the type of dude to have like 3 gfs at once but not an open relationship just straight-up cheating
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
in a modern au junior discovers furry culture and refuses to wear anything but a pigeon fursuit for three years straight
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
he left frances with more trauma than she mayb had :))))
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
hes a fuckin furry. let him be a FURRY MAKE HENRY BUFF AGAIN I THINK YOU MEAN MAKE JUNIOR A PIGEON AGAIN
BONUS: PATTY
A: what I think realistically
she has a Huge family and sends all of them christmas cards, and she only has one great-niece who cares enough to reply and visit and stuff and sometimes the neice brings her kids and patty fuckin loves kids and spoils em like a grandchild
also she sends christmas cards to her neighbors and invites them over for dinner weekly
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
she sews and she once had an awful neighbor who was a total bitch so she bought this cheap-ass shirt, fixed it up in a day, but it looked new and beautifully made and the neighbor felt so bad and patty just. >:3c dont be a bitch
the neighbor got to keep the gift tho and was Nicer and patty was :3c
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
she feels SO BAD that she didnt notice henry and nancy being missing sooner bc she ALWAYS wanted to be friends w them both and she loved em to bits
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
shes a trans lesbian and has a long-time wife :3c
KENNITH (this ones just gonna be kin shit but shhhh ;))) )
A: what I think realistically
if its not a school day and hes home alone kennith 100000% will Not change out of his pajamas and will yell at you for wearing shoes in his room dont fuckin touch him with your nasty-ass feet stephamie
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
KENNITH GETS SUPER DRUNK AND STARTS FORGETTING THINGS HE JUST DID AND GETTING REALLY FUCKING CONFUSED AS STEPH LAUGHS HER ASS OFF THREE FEET AWAY (based on my own experiences)
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
kennith has an ed he doesnt know how to deal with and doesnt even think is that Bad so hes just suffering :’))) can relate buddy
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
hes trans you cowards and in a qpp with steph
STEPH
A: what I think realistically
steph is Rlly skilled at punching and taught kennith how to punch but also if u rub her back she will Deactivate in .2 seconds so even if she acts tough she has a fuckin self-destruct button and its her back
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
STEPH AND KENNITH MAKING DIRECT EYE CONTACT AS THEY COME UP WITH INCREASINGLY BAD ALTERNATE TITLES FOR A PENIS
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
steph tends to put on a Happy Face bc she thinks kenniths problems are worse than hers, so she has no help and no clue how to deal with them and just gets worse and worse :’))
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
shes a fuckin lesbian in a qpp with kennith you cowards and shes genderfluid
GREG
A: what I think realistically
this man has fuckin Depression my lads and anxiety and tends to self-medicate with weed even tho he Knows its prob not the best option but i mean. hes a retail worker can he afford meds? no
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
if you do Anything greg will probably stay apathetic, and he can say most things with a straight face. he enjoys making completely filthy jokes with an unwavering neutral expression and watching people crumble
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
……………tbh hed prob think he couldve done More to help kennith after he Died but never did so i can imagine hed feel. kinda guilty sdkjfhsdkf maybe my kin ass is just hopeful
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
let him have two moms you cowards (also him and kennith are boyfs dont make the rules my kin ass is GAY)
BONUS: JENNY
A: what I think realistically
….tbh they seem like the type of person who always has a sketchpad and paints a lot and is just Super artsy
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
jenny and kennith lock eyes and they can instantly feel the hatred kennith emits bc t h a t s  h i s  f p  but also they can tell he wants steph to be happy and they can SEE the STRUGGLE on his FACE and he looks kind of like an angry chihuahua
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
…..tbh i dont have anything for them
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
let them be a nonbinary lesbian who draws their gf constantly
BRI (aka kin ass two: electric bogaloo :3c)
A: what I think realistically
tbh they seem like the type of person to have a cat. in my canon it was an orange cat named sherbet B3c they love that cat to Death and show it to avery on video calls
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
bri says “rawr XD” out loud and accidentally says that to a teacher, who stands there for .3 seconds and kind of just goes with it
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
they dont actually die and have to live with their gf bein dead :’)
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
they live and also so does avery and theyre happy fuck you
AVERY
A: what I think realistically
tbh she seems like the type of person to have a wide friend group but only be “close” close with like. 1-2 people??? and like she loves all of her friends but she cant maintain that many close friends
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
she once laughed so hard she snorted soda out of her nose during a video call
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
her last thought is of bri :’)
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
SHE AND BRI ARE  H A P P Y AND ALIVE
SPOI
A: what I think realistically
they seem the type of person to like???? fuckin rag on shows while watching them, ie shout at the screen, point out plot holes etc and then say “wtf i loved it” at the end
also they throw popcorn at the screen during the movies
B: what I think is fucking hilarious
they hide under nancys table and let out a vicious shriek whenever nancy accidentally kicks them
C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
they cause Endless Suffering and dont even care like they cant sympathize or manage to be Decent and like. they LAUGH at it and its like??? a s s h o l e
(and i have like No Empathy but i can still manage to be a nice person so?? no excuse there)
D: what would never work with canon but the canon is shit so I believe it anyway
theyre the one stealing nancys bobbins >:00
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