#mom abused

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:

There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’

like wow babe. good fucking point

#like you were on the ground biting the carpet and dry sobbing while you wrote that and still. good fucking point #not a shitpost #cptsd #and it's true. there's never a satisfying answer #the truth is i know why i wasn't loved #i analyzed my parent's traumas and abuse to death. i understand why i alienated and was alienated from my siblings #i know why my mom was too overwhelmed to be capable of nurturing #i know why my dad vanished into addiction and avoidance #the details of our cycles of trauma and cptsd and family history i have a phd in all of it #i understood perfectly. i spent years studying and now i knew the answer #and guess what? IT WAS NOT SATISFYING!!! #because they still didn't love me! and i still couldn't change that! #it was still a completely unsatisfying state of affairs! #so like. when the people who are supposed to love you...don't. #when the people who are supposed to take care of you...fail to #you can look for answers and reasons and explanations #but that's not actually going to FIX your situation. #and it's probably not within your ability TO fix the situation. (and definitely not your job) #because you don't need answers--you need a new situation #*inserts Just Walk Out. You Can Leave!!! (Running Skeleton) Meme* #and yes. walking out isn't always possible. #but for you i hope it will be one day soon. and i hope you build the courage to take that leap. #stepping away from the people who failed to love you...it feels like being untethered but also like being lighter than air #new and scary. immensely relieving. the future opens up. empty but empty like a canvas. blindingly bright until your eyes adjust #like climbing out of a pit you called home and for the first time realizing how bright the light of day can truly be #when you aren't just getting glimpses from the bottom of a hole

[buggachat]

(random s5 finale musings) tbh I don't think Marinette chose to keep The Secrets™ from Adrien because Gabriel asked her to. I feel like Marinette keeping secrets like that is so consistent with her character; she hates giving people bad news, she hates rocking the boat, she hates upsetting people, she always chooses to keep any 'controversial' information to herself for as long as she can get away with (examples: bubbler scarf, telling Queen Bee she was benched, confessing to Adrien, warning Chat Noir about Scarabella or Rena Furtive, never told Chat Noir about Chat Blanc, etc) that I just totally believe she would've done it either way. She was even already having nightmares about Adrien hating her for finding out she defeated his father, so I feel like Gabriel's request was moreso giving her a go-ahead than it was a primary deciding factor, yknow?

#ml s5 spoilers #tbh half the time when thinking about it I forget that gabriel asked her to do it at all #because it just feels like such a Marinette™ thing to do to me lol #to be fair maybe I'm downplaying it? I do think Gabriel's plea struck some emotional chord with her too and helped push her that direction #but again I. totally believe she'd do it either way #and I do strongly believe that her decision is moreso ''I don't want to hurt Adrien'' than it is ''I want to honor Gabriel's final wish'' #she loves to avoid verbal/emotional problems and hoooo boy idk a worse verbal/emotion problem than #telling your boyfriend that his entire life is a lie and that he's not entirely human and that he was abused and controlled and puppeteered #all his life and also that his father was a terrorist and that she saw his mom's corpse in the basement #I mean. I don't think I'd have the emotional maturity to break that to someone either and I'm not.... FOURTEEN.... LOL

[witchyykitten]

everyone talks about cutting off a toxic parent

but no one ever talks about the pain of wanting a parent but knowing yours cannot love you the way they should

#toxic mom #toxic mother #toxicmommy #toxic family #toxic parents #child abuse #narcissistic abuse #parental abuse #mental abuse #emotional abuse #abuse survivor #actually abused #why my family don't love me? #i hate my family #family issues #dysfunctional family #family #dysfunctional household #dysfunctional parents #dad issues #toxic father #father #toxic dad #emotionally unstable mother #emotionally immature parents #narcissistic mother #childhood trauma

[nmolesofadrenaline]

#childhood #childhood ptsd #childhood neglect #abuse survivor #emotional abuse #toxic family #dysfunctional family #toxic parents #toxic mom #on father #on fathers #fathers

[serialunaliver]

if you say things like "you should be suspicious of peoples intentions with your baby" I hope you're including family's intentions not just strangers ... I only ever hear talk of people like babysitters and teachers but you'll stay silent when it's your husband because it's "complicated" 🤷🏻‍♀️

#child abuse #i'm on mom tiktok rn if you can't tell LOL

[liberalsarecool]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Disgusting display of white supremacy and groomed virtueless moms.

#moms for liberty #hate groups #abusers

[cemeterything]

Please in no way shape or form feel obligated to answer this but since I so rarely hear about MEDICAL abuse as opposed to, ya know, the more traditional verbal/physical type (tho I think that they often go hand-in-hand) and I want to compare experiences. Was your mom "always" alternative for EVERYONE or did she make exceptions for herself? For example my mom never got me vaccinated and, like yours, withheld all sorts of medication under the guise of "protecting" me but when she got diagnosed with a chronic illness she started taking whatever the doctors gave her under excuses of her pain being "unbearable" or HER doctor not being a quack like the others, etc. Honestly it's been 4 years since I've had any contact with my mom but what makes me the maddest looking back was her hypocrisy.

my mom is on the opposite end of the spectrum in that regard. she categorically refuses to participate in any medical treatment that conflicts with her personal principles, and claimed she would kill herself if she was faced with no choice but to be vaccinated during covid (needless to say i haven't told her i'm fully vaxxed), and i believe her, because once when she had a fever so high her body seized up and she went into shock she refused to let us take her to hospital and told me she'd never forgive me if i dialled for a doctor. the whole experience needless to say didn't make me trust her opinion more, and i'm aware of how ableist and dangerous her "if your body isn't strong enough to deal with its health issues naturally it's because you're doing something wrong" stance is. i'm really sorry your mom is such a hypocrite though, that's hellishly infuriating.

#suicide mention #my mom is more or less like those people who believe that any medical intervention #is ontologically evil because it goes against the will of god #except its not a faith thing shes just conspiracybrained #honestly im pretty sure shes experienced some horrific medical abuse that traumatised her and made her easy prey #for conspiracy theorists and con artists but thats not an excuse for endangering other peoples lives

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

I want a story where the angels didn't fall, they jumped. they clipped their own wings, knowing their Master wouldn't have a use or a need for them once they were damaged and less-than-holy. they could not defeat the Tyrant who exerted absolute control over their lives, so they abandoned heaven their homeland in exchange for independence, accepting exile as its own form of freedom. and hell is just the place where all unwanted things are sent--be they angels or souls who just will not obey.

#been looking through old story ideas and remembering that as a teenager #i processed religious trauma by turning it into blasphemous creative writing #there's also the story where the protagonist was a vampire and a friend of jesus's mom #and so was personally responsible for the resurrection of christ #and the one where satan was the mother figure of all the angels in heaven #and the 'Rebellion' was actually satan leaving her abusive spouse to protect her kids #anyways i have many feelings about being raised christian and all of those feelings are Spite

[nothing0fnothing]

The number of times I've caught myself in the middle of telling myself how worthless, unlovable, dislikable and embarrassing I am is too many. It's almost every day.

And sometimes I correct myself and say "I am not unlovable" "I am allowed to make mistakes" "I have grown and changed since then."

Sometimes, I just wallow in the shame.

#raised by narcissists #narcissistic abuse #dysfunctional family #childhood trauma #parental abuse #dysfunctional household #toxic parents #vent post #toxic mom #complex trauma #mental health #mental illness #mentally fucked #actually mentally ill #overwhelmed #coping #therapy

[witchyykitten]

#why my family don't love me? #family issues #dysfunctional family #toxic family #strict mommy #toxic mom #mommy issues #mom issues #mommyissues #emotionally unstable mother #narcissistic mother #toxic mother #mother issues #childhood trauma #child abuse #dysfunctional household #dysfunctional parents #trauma #actually traumatized #emotional abuse #mental abuse #narcissistic abuse #parental abuse

[bet-on-me-13]

Ellie worked undercover at Cadmus

So, Ellie has grown up and become an Adult living on her own by now.

She is doing her best to make the most out of her life. She went to school, graduated from College, and even got a Job.

She grew up in a Lab, and learned quite a bit about Genetic Engineering over the course of her life both before and after escaping (Both from Vlad, and from Danny during that Point in time where they were trying to permanently stabilize her).

So, when she gets an offer to join a new start-up Company called Cadmus, she jumped at the opportunity to use her Knowledge to help others. (She was told it was a Research Company that used Genetic Engineering to make medicines)

It wasn't until she had already signed the NDA that she figured out that this was an Illegal Cloning Lab.

Thankfully, she was immune to the Mind Control that they had tried to use on all of the Scientists to make them okay with all of the illegal shit, but she still had to play the part so she could help the poor clones who would be created in this project.

She went Undercover for years. Any time a Clone was deemed a "Failure", she would try her best to save them. She did manage to save a few, sending them to Danny so he could help them find a home, but unfortunately she couldn't save them all.

After a few years, the other scientists began to stress out. The K-Series had been a total failure so far, and none of the Clones had even come close to being Viable. Even the most successful one, identified as Match, couldn't come close to being called an actual success.

So, they went a different route. If Kryptonian DNA didn't want to be Cloned, then maybe they could splice it with some other DNA and force it to work with them?

The Scientists began splicing Human DNA into the Genome, running trials to see if it would be Viable at all before even attempting to create a Full Clone. And they did find some success, preliminary tests showed that Human DNA was uniquely adaptable when it came to splicing, and theoretically it could be used to make a Fully Viable Clone!

When Luthor heard of this, he deemed that nobody aside from himself was worthy of being the "Father", and gave his own DNA to the Scientists to use for the Experiment.

Ellie was put in charge of transporting the DNA to the Lab, but in a random accident (we both know it wasn't, Clockwork), she ends up dropping the Sample. In a rush, she just puts some of her own Blood into the Vial and gives it to the Scientists working on the Gene Splicing Project. (She was panicking, ok?! Nobody would be able to work in a lab like this without getting a little bit of anxiety, and she hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in days at that point!)

They are thrilled! They don't know why, but Mr Luthor's DNA was so much better at Splicing than any other Human DNA they had ever tested before. He was certainly right about his own DNA being the beat suited for the Job!

Ellie meanwhile is having a bit of a meltdown. She can't believe she just gave them some of her DNA! And they already used it to make a Fetus! She's a mother now! She never wanted to be a Mom!

But she guesses that none of that matters anymore. She's has a son now, and she needs to get him out of there. But how to do it? As the only successful K-Series Clone, he was under the most heavily guarded security imaginable, so there was absolutely no way she would ever be able to sneak him out of there. Even if she used her powers, the Security was primed to scan for any and all foreign energy signatures, even Ecto Energy.

So for now, she was stuck. She couldn't break him out, and she also couldn't just leave the Company and let them abuse all those poor clones like that! She just needed to wait for the right opportunity to get her son out of there, even if it meant that she would have to stay behind.

It wasn't until a team of errant Sidekicks broke into the Lab a few years later, that she had a way out for her son.

#Dp x dc #Dpxdc #Dc x dp #Dcxdp #Dcu #Dc #Danny Phantom #Ellie Phantom #Dani Phantom #Conner Kent #Superboy #Young Justice #Cadmus #Ellie is just trying to find a way to save her son #But she can't just leave and let all those other Clones be abused by Cadmus again #Conner doesn't know he has a Mom #Maybe part 2 #Ellie was just really stressed out that day #She hadn't gotten any sleep for the past few weeks and when she dropped the Vial of Luthors blood she just made an impulse decision #It was slightly manipulated by Clockwork so she could have a son of her own but he will never admit to it #She scares him #Possible part 2 of Conner finding out? #Idk #I do like the idea though

[nmolesofadrenaline]

#abuse survivor #toxic family #toxic parents #toxic mom #dysfunctional family #emotional abuse #love love love #survival #actually ptsd #childhood ptsd #ptsdlife #tw ptsd #living with ptsd

[dejwrld]

a black mom lost her 11 year old son that was protecting her from her abuser she dated over a decade ago (which a judge denied her protection order 3 weeks prior to this tragic event), another young girl was shot in the head and killed by her abusive ex boyfriend whom she tried to leave the day prior but he damaged her car, & 19 year old was fatally stabbed (and died) alongside her twin sister (who survived the attack) after rejecting a boy’s advances outside of a bodega. ladies please be safe out here. these men and boys (because there has been an increase of incel behavior in teenage boys also) are unhinged. they will rather take you out of this world than deal with their own emotions of rejection.

we shouldn’t live in a world where as women we have to give out fake google numbers and fake instagram pages just because we don’t know if a man/boy is having a decent day enough to not kill or harm us because we rejected them.

so please be safe out here once again.

#tw: femicide #tw: death #the situation with the mom breaks my heart because she did all the right things people that victim blame abuse victims to do #she went to the police…she went to a judge and they denied her protection order #idk why he even was out of jail anyway

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I booked a $250 event as a gift to my mom where they'd teach you how to wash/clean dolphins but it got canceled because Harry Styles got arrested for never cooking for his wife and it was claimed to be domestic violence and it was all over the news like a national emergency so every hotel and every booking got denied.

#dream #mom #mother #dolphin #harry styles #domestic violence tw #abuse tw

[rosemaryyuri]

it's so hilarious how a large chunk of the homestuck fandom actually and genuinely believes everything rose lalonde says about herself and her life. she would be so happy. You think I'm cool, calm, and put together? You think I'm a reliable therapist for my friends? Tell me more.

#it's so funny. they fall for her front and whatever she says about her mother postretcon #(yes mom lalonde WAS abusive and severely neglected her child emotionally and physically to the point rose could not take a genuine gesture #of gift giving as anything other than deeply ironic and spiteful and also actively snuck around the house to avoid interacting with her #mother. not to mention mom lalonde was Drunk All The Time and offered rose alcohol. but yeah sure just believe the 16 year old) #talk tag #rose #sorry i just saw such a take i needed to say something about it or i would Die

[sideblogdotjpeg]

thinking about mother figures in neverafter.

(no colour version under read more)

#dimension 20 #neverafter #d20 #pinocchio #pinocchio neverafter #ylfa snorgelsson #mother timothy goose #but yeah ive been thinking a lot abt like. the potential relationship between between mother goose and pinocchio #like. mother goose to pinocchio being like. a symbol of maternal love that isnt wrapped in abuse and control #but at the same time - while mother goose extends kindness and protection to all children - #im not sure if thats something pinocchio cam accept right now #but i cant stop thinking of him just. observing the relationship between ylfa and tim. and what that says abt his relationship with his mom #umm..... yeah i cant write fanfiction so this is what i do instead um ^_^ #and also. a chance to draw mother goose being maternal to ylfa #THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS SOOO CUTE. HE IS SUCH A SUPPORTIVE MOM. #auugh <<333 they r so sweet #like im 247 pinocchio brain but uh.... ^_^ #posts by me dot com