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rongzhi · 6 months

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Hi! Love your TikTok translations, they help me learn so much. Sorry if you've answered this before already, but as a language student myself, I was just curious about how you got so good at Chinese - is it a native language for you, or what's your background in using/studying it? Thank you!

I think I answered this a long time ago (like 2021 maybe) so I will just tell it again. It's kind of a longwinded boring post that's very self-centric (😬) and also probably not going to have any helpful advice to the average language learner, so I'm going to put it under a read more!

Background

My family is Chinese so it's my heritage language. I did learn it before English as a baby but then forgot a lot of it. My parents speak Chinese at home but I always replied in English growing up. Part of this is because I have a twin sibling and because we spoke English at school, we also started speaking English to each other at home.

We went to Chinese school on Sundays growing up (this is like a community/cultural school; it included other courses like math, Chinese dance, art, pre-SATs (lol), etc, depending on who in the community was available to teach), but I didn't really pay attention so my Chinese was pretty shit for a long time—like broken conversational level shitty, although I have always had a strong comprehension ability. My dad's side is from Sichuan so I grew up understanding a bit of Sichuanese.

The beginning of my "studying"

I don't actually have much of a background studying Chinese in a formal setting. I took Chinese 101-103 in college as part of a language requirement (specifically chose to start with 101 so I could relearn basics, even though my teachers kept offering to place me in higher levels). I really credit my Chinese 101 prof who was also the college's calligraphy teacher for making us focus on brush stroke order and recognising characters and understanding semantic components, which is something other profs did not emphasise (they were more focused on building conversational skills).

Anyway, that was only my freshman year of college because I ended up changing majors and not having a language requirement anymore (boo). I continued studying a bit of Chinese in the intervening years, but I am not a very disciplined person when it comes to self-study, so much of it was just translating song lyrics for my own amusement. During this time, I also started watching some cdramas, but mostly just Chinese web shows, which maybe helped? (I don't think I was watching enough for it to really make a difference).

Fast forward a couple years to 2020 and I started watching more cdramas during lockdowns, including watching 成化十四年 (The Sleuth of Ming Dynasty), which I was super invested in for about two years (this used to be a fandom blog lol). Basically, hyperfixation led me to rapidly improve my Chinese; I started translating a few behind-the-scenes videos for fandom friends. In order to keep up with Chinese fans and gain access to more material about the show, I started venturing onto Chinese sites such as weibo, bilibili, and eventually, douyin, which I downloaded around October of 2020 (so this was 6 months into my increased interest into Chinese things). At first, I translated a couple of douyins to share with fandom friends as I had done with behind-the-scenes materials, but for whatever reason I felt like some of the videos I wanted to translate would just be annoying to spam into the chat... I couldn't figure out a way to connect them to the blorbos, but I still wanted to translate them, so I started posting them here on tumblr. That's how my douyin translations started out. This was the height of covid-19 related sinophobia, too, so at some point I started realising how important it was to continue translating douyins, and that motivated me to continue even beyond it just being a fun thing to do. On that topic, it was through this blog that I realised how poorly understood China and Chinese people are, specifically on this site. I feel like that has changed a lot, or maybe that's just a comment on insular online spaces, but I have to think not; since I started translating douyins, I've seen a noticeable decrease in sinophobic comments and messages (not that I don't still get them, but it's lessened), and I think that's also thanks in great part to other blogs on here that were posting/have started to post more content from China to help increase exposure to tumblr users.

Improving

In any case, in the beginning, I did a lot of translations mostly by ear rather than reading captions because my Chinese reading wasn't that good.

It's kind of slowly improved with time and repetitive reading, and over the last three years now, I've also gone through periods of taking notes and actively seeking out some vocab lists or grammar explanations... but it usually comes in the process of trying to translate something. My motivations in "studying" (it's more like "figuring out") Chinese is largely based on the simple desire to know what people are talking about... what they're joking about... what they're ranting about and roasting. Related: I also started reading fanfics in Chinese about a year ago. Some fics have been easier to read than others, but some of the best ones I've read were also the ones that challenged me the most, and which I had to take a lot of notes on while reading. I'll admit! There have been times where I just took a fic and dumped that sucker in google translate and have it read the Chinese to me, so I could just listen to it like a podfic. But even so, I would take notes, because I think my improvements in Chinese are heavily connected to my Chinese literacy.

Reading douyin comments and forums on douban or comment sections on bilibili has been one of the main ways that I've picked up on common phrases and characters. I often write things down but I do so more as a muscle memory practice, because I have never really been the sort of person who reads back notes (this was also how I studied in school, iirc). Branching out and translating things that are written in formal or non-colloquial styles is also a way I challenge myself from time to time, and I do like to look up the etymology of Chinese characters from time to time because it helps me pick up patterns of semantics and phonetic hints when I'm reading (this makes it easier to guess what a character might mean or sound like, even if you've never seen it before). Overall, translation has been the great learning tool for me. I think maybe it comes down to learning styles? I have always learned better from trying to teach others, and I feel like translation works a similar muscle in the mind; translation is about figuring out ways to efficiently communicate a message, and in order to do so, you must be able to grasp the essence of what it is you're relaying.

All this said... And to try and return to your original ask after all my usual Wawa rambling... I actually don't think my Chinese is that good, lol. In fact, there's probably people who follow this blog who are studying Chinese in a more conventional and methodical manner whose Chinese is objectively much better than mine 🤷🏻‍♂️ I mean, if you crunch the numbers, I have really only be self-"studying" for three years. Three years of what is really just vibe-based learning. There's a lot of vocab I still don't know (I mean my English vocab is pretty limited too, sooo.... 😭), a lot of areas that I can still improve on, and am improving on, and try to improve on... when the mood strikes. Again, I am not a very disciplined self-study type.

Maybe this will give any other Chinese diaspora hope, though. I feel like it's never too late for us to start learning. There is probably a seed or language foundation within you already which will make it easier for you to start, and then after that, I think it sort of comes down to finding what interests you and will keep you motivated.

Most of the stuff I talk about on here when it comes to culture or folk art or what have you, I did not know even five years ago! I learned about it because I was interested to find out more. (That's another reason I have to laugh when I get some of the asks I do in my inbox... The stuff I don't answer is dumbfounding at times. You translate a couple of funny videos and people think you're some kind of Tripadvisor cultural ambassador guy! I swear...)

The "study" resources I use regularly are the following:

Pleco

Zh-En browser extension

Yellowbridge (usually to check brush stroke order, since I have Pleco)

Baidu etymology pages / Chinese etymology dictionaries such as hanziyuan

#text #answered ask #about me

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sanctus-ingenium · 2 years

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WIPs of some of my drawings where i made a full little painting for the sketch to nail colours or values first. i thought it would be fun to do a Behind The Scenes and also show u how some drawings changed, what i kept and what i discarded and at what point i just started adding unplanned details

all these were done using a mixture of sai and procreate

more comments on The Process under the cut

eye of the otherworld is inspired by a real photo i took two weeks ago!

i soooo wanted to draw water that looked like this, weeds and all, so the original colours of that sketch were picked direct from the photo. but i wasn’t satisfied with it so i changed it using a gradient map (you can see it’s crunchy on the borders between colours). for the final, i re-painted everything again using the sketch colours as a guide so that i would not end up with the crunchy edges a gradient map will give u, and so that i could add in extra contrast over the top. the black swirl pattern in the final was an ad lib lol but i’m really happy with how it gives the impression of water or liquid even if it’s not realistic... i will try again to recreate something like this photo tho because i am obsessed. the birds were originally swans but the necks were driving me crazy i needed a bird with a shorter neck and grebes are associated with this location in canon so it was perfect. they have very funny feet. the last detail i added to this was the white flashes in their primary flight feathers (which do not occur in nature btw)

hanged man was an interesting one because it’s based on a sketch i made in 2020 when i first wrote this fun impalement scene

here is félix being impaled for the first time in 2020 by a rusted harpoon that essentially rips his human disguise off to reveal the black carapace underneath

for the coloured sketch in the photoset i re-lined this exact sketch in sai to update it to match my current lineart style, but as you can see i realised the pose itself needed work and not just a re-line so i completely redid it in procreate to exaggerate the pose and gestures. i went into this one already knowing exactly what bg colours i wanted so that was no issue but the hardest part was weirdly figuring out what he was going to be standing on. in canon he is standing on top of a very high wall and leaning back over a fatal drop. the black pencil lines in the clouds and the bird were ad libbed but i liked the idea of throwing the bird in as some extra symbol of freedom the likes of which you will not experience if you have been shot with a harpoon. the green was not working at all so the swap out to more purpley pink tones was last minute. i unified the different colours by using a colour-shifting brush (you’ll see that his gaiters are different colours - i didn’t hand pick those, the colour jitter did)

for Big Pascal... originally it was going to be a confrontation between the guy on the ground and pascal but i wasn’t feeling the standing pose and it ended up being... if not restful then at least maybe a little more benevolent than the shadow of colossus shit it was before. the white cracks in the sky were originally going to be black but it just didn’t work. a lot of people tag this one as some form of cowboy aesthetic which is funny to me. there’s no cowboys here

i do like the lens flare effect in the b&w thumbnail tbh and i think i kind of lost the low camera angle effect in the final

i drew a bonus comic of the two characters interacting during this scene (mostly the lil guy just trying to ignore what’s happening in the sky)

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homisexual11 · 3 months

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Jalice X Reader Headcanons

Jasper Whitlock/Hale and Alice Cullen X Reader

Warnings: cursing, mentions of vampirism… NSFW at the end.

SFW

–Alice had seen you coming and told Jasper all about it. They fell for you so quickly, even if it took Jasper a bit longer (he definitely had to meet you first and get to know you) than it took Alice (who saw you in her vision and told Jasper everything… he surprisingly took it well)

–Alice spoils you rotten. She gets you clothes, jewelry if you are a girl, literally anything, even if you don’t ask.

–Alice got your first kiss. It had been an accident, she was kissing all over your face and didn’t think and kissed your lips... It was actually cute.

–Jasper took a while before he could touch you, and when he did for the first time Alice had to be right next to you. She didn’t think he would hurt you–no, she knew–but it was for his comfort.

–”It’s alright, Jasper, you won’t hurt her/him,” is a common saying from Alice.

–Once Jasper could finally touch you, physical touch would 100% be his love language. (Along with words of affirmation)

–Alice’s love languages are gifts and quality time… but she likes all of them.

–You are their singer, which makes it harder for the poor cowboy.

–Yes, you call him cowboy. It’s just teasing, but it’s super cute.

–They give you the cutest (or most random nicknames ever) ex. “Baby Love” was used once.

–Alice unironically called you kitten for a while.

–If you turned and were together in the 2020s, you and Alice would jokingly call Jasper Pookie and he hates it so much.

–Jasper is always the first to apologize after a fight. Always.

–Jasper is such a fucking gentleman. Opening doors, guiding either you or Alice on his arm, relatively open-minded, mostly the mature one in fights. He’s also just the peacekeeper.

–Alice is very progressive in relationship stuff, but can work with whatever you need; whereas, Jasper can sometimes stick to certain older tendencies. (Although he listens to what you have to say if you’re a woman, he does think that even if you could kill him if you were a vampire, he needs to protect you.)

–Jasper wouldn’t even think about touching you inappropriately until you were married, even after that he would be hesitant… unless you were a vampire.

–Alice loves doing your hair.

–So does Jasper, but he doesn’t ask… unless you’re like laying with him and he’ll mindlessly play with your hair.

–It’s gentle love. Very much. Mostly because of Jasper, but Alice is gentle as well.

–The first area of you Jasper kissed was your hand. Argue with the wall.

–Alice casually leans her head on your shoulder a lot. She’s a cuddle bug; a lot of little touches from her like she’ll have a hand on your arm or something like that.

–Casual dominance with Jasper… anyways.

–They both are always checking if you’ve eaten or drank anything.

–Jasper 100% regulates your mood. Not all the time, but if something happens and you get SUPER mad or something like that he’ll calm you down. If you weren’t okay with it, he wouldn’t do it all the time, but in a case where something bad was gonna happen, he would.

–Jasper would let you and Alice paint his nails if you begged hard enough. (Guilt trip the already manipulated boyyyy)

NSFW

–They’re both relatively dominant. They’re both soft doms, though.

–I know you see fanfictions that are like “Oh the Major would come out and he would span–” No, boy wouldn’t harm you to save his life. The worst that’ll happen is he’ll rail you into oblivion, but never physically harm you… besides the fucking into oblivion.

–They both love to give, but receiving >>>> just depends on when you ask them though.

–Jasper would not touch you until after you got married, although Alice didn’t believe in that, she wanted the first time to be special and if you wanted it to be with all three of them she would wait.

–If you were still human, it would be SO gentle. Like S O G E N T L E. They would focus all on you, Jasper would keep his mouth away from you though.

–Jasper used his gift to make you feel pleasure, which led to overstimulation… safe to say that is what the “punishment” would be if you were into that, rather than spanking.

–If you’re not into any of that, they can be vanilla too. Jasper is obviously close to vanilla anyways, so…

–Alice loves it when you go down on her.

–Jasper was afraid to let either of you go on top at first, but after a while (and a lot of praising to him) he would.

–In that case, he would call you “ma’am/sir.” He normally calls you that, but when he says it in a whiny voice >>>>

–Once you have turned… it lasts a long time.

–Jasper will kiss you all over, ALL OVER. and Alice is just like, “Woah, save some for me–” he’s just making up for lost kisses.

–Sweetest nicknames that could go in SFW as well, but oh well.

Ex. From Jasper: “Hon, doll, sugar, darlin’, babydoll, LITTLE ONE? even princess( if you were a girl)” From Alice: “Sweet boy/girl, sweetie, sweetness, honey, baby, kitten..”

–Jasper calls it lovemaking, Alice calls it whatever most people call it at the time.

#twilight saga #twilight x reader #twilight x y/n #twilight headcanons #jalice #alice cullen #jasper hale #jasper hale x reader #jasper whitlock #headcanons #x reader

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justalia · 11 months

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belief

this post takes inspiration from my journey and my unconscious “positive” manifestations.

i found manifestation back in 2020, didn’t think much of it to be honest and didn’t even attempt manifesting anything because the advice i found was to affirm and persist and laziness got over me. i couldn’t be bothered to do all that. i tried once ngl, i failed and never picked it up again until 2022.

in 2022 tiktok started to popularize this shit with weird quirky methods and at the time i started to think again about an sp. i randomly desired her but we had went no contact since 2020 and i wasn’t really that bothered by her presence/absence. i started to miss her and i would ALWAYS (i know you do this too) make up scenarios that implied we were together.

now this wasn’t conscious so i wasn’t thinking i was manifesting her, i didn’t give a shit mostly cause i did not wanna reach out to her and i just wanted to make up my silly little scenarios with no consequences.

putting the scenarios to the side i started to rediscover manifestation and found the whisper method on tiktok, long story short i did it and the next day she reached out to me all of a sudden. it was so random and it made no sense based on the method i did but i took it as a conscious manifestation because i had done that method.

spoiler: i was in the state of being in a relationship with her and the 3D reflected that.

this happened again in november, i set the intention to manifest something and i scripted it. i was constantly checking the 3D and then i decided i was done with it and i would just make up my silly little scenarios about it in my head.

i had so much fun with my imagination but i didn’t even think i was manifesting shit left and right because of it. i thought the methods were doing that for me. i thought that i just had to script it as it had already happened and it would manifest. i didn’t know what states were, i had no idea what law of assumption was in the first place.

this being said you can see that i always had the habit of experiencing my desire in imagination if i couldn’t get it in the outside. i always used imagination like a kid and to be honest that did manifest some good things in my life.

the fact that it wasn’t conscious tho didn’t allow me to maintain my manifestation when it came because i was focusing on the outside reality and didn’t recognize that it was my own doing, i didn’t recognize that i was the cause of everything.

this leads me to what i wanna talk about: belief.

reading edward art’s series led me to realize what was so difficult for me in the first stages of my journey of conscious manifestation.

i started studying law of assumption and everyone talked about belief: “believe it to be true” “believe you have it” “believe imagination”.

all these things confused me so much because i was like “what? that’s crazy, why do i have to act delusional, i manifested shit before and it wasn’t this hard”.

i was just finding out the mechanism of what i always had done in the past without even realizing it.

“give it to yourself in imagination”

i swear to god if only i understood before how easy this shit was supposed to be i would’ve saved myself from a lot of heartache and troubles. i was so stressed while learning and applying the law the first times that i literally didn’t get my period for a month because of how stressed i was lmao.

and it is crazy how i always used to do it yet i found the law to be so difficult to understand at first.

now my perspective is that belief is too strong of a word, belief is just a feeling, something you feel to be true IN IMAGINATION. it’s not about the outside. IT NEVER IS. it never was and it never will be. i thank edward art because he was able to put into words what i was struggling with and when i read his series i felt understood.

belief is to strong of a word. belief is just a feeling, something i feel to be true in imagination. nothing more nothing less. saying “in imagination” i do not want to imply there is a waiting period between the 3D and the 4D being reflected, cause to be honest i don’t believe it and i’ve not experienced all the time.

yes. all you have to do to “manifest” i know it is real in imagination and discard the outer world because why would it matter if you can have exactly what you want in imagination NOW?

all is mind, there’s no reason at all to want/need the 3D to reflect in order to feel your desire to be yours.

when i unconsciously manifested with fulfillment in imagination i did not think about believing anything, i simply felt what i wanted to feel. i satisfied myself with the only way i knew: daydreaming.

but alia, i daydream all the time why doesn’t it manifest?

because you daydream then wait for something to happen. when i unconsciously manifested something just by imagining having it i wad not EVER focused on getting it from the outside, i did not give a shit about the outer world and just enjoyed imagination because i wanted to and because i could. the key is: I HAD NO EXPECTATIONS. I WAS NOT EXPECTING ANYTHING FROM MY IMAGINAL ACTS. I WAS NOT DOING ANYTHING TO CHANGE ANYTHING.

i was simply feeling what i wanted to feel.

read that again.

i was simply feeling what i wanted to feel. i was craving an experience and i decided to experience it in imagination. i thought to myself “well i can’t do anything to have it physically i don’t give a shit at this point i’m just gonna satisfy myself with imagination”

was i worried about:

is imagination enough? is it gonna reflect? is it gonna manifest? do i have it? am i doing enough?

NO I WAS NOT.

why? because i wasn’t trying to get anything in the first place!!!

i accepted that i could only have it in imagination and that i couldn’t do anything to manifest it because “the universe” would take care of it. (those were my beliefs at the time).

now i’m grateful to have found the law because i was not aware of how limitless we are and of the fact that circumstances did not matter at all and i could manifest literally ANYTHING i wanted. ANYTHING. i was still tied to logic before studying law of assumption so i didn’t fulfill every single desire i got but only the ones that were “realistic” like an sp.

and at the end of the day what even is realistic?

is manifesting an sp realistic? i don’t think so.

if you put logic into the game is it even really realistic to manifest someone to be in a relationship with you? probably not.

so if logic doesn’t apply anywhere at all in law of assumption and manifestation why would i worry about “making it happen”? all i have to do is enjoy having it in imagination.

the rest will follow like everything does.

i do not believe in the fact that there’s a time lag, i simply accept that i cannot know how imagination will be expressed and that includes the when because i don’t know which bridge of incidents i will take part in, i believe the 3D reflects imagination instantly in ways we don’t know anything of.

redirecting to the main topic:

belief is not something you should struggle with, you just have to FEEL what you want to be true in imagination, feel that you have it now, imagine yourself to have it/be it and imagine it in the most amazing way possible so that you WANT to go back to it, not because it manifests but because it is exactly what you want.

it is not your job to make anything happen on the outside, you can’t and you never will be able to.

you cannot experience it on the outside. accept this now and fulfill your desire in imagination now.

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firstkanaphans · 3 months

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Hello Sarah sorry to bother you. I'm a new fan kinda but I'm done with watching all the firstkhao dramas (together and individual) but tbh I'm kinda lost on how I will get to know them better. I have no idea about their irl personalities that much. Maybe you can give a little introduction for me if it's not too much of a bother? Also like how they met and why are they doing so many projects together? And are they good friends irl too (my friend told me a lot of time pair actors don't really get along with each other which is why I got curious about their dynamic) Sorry if these questions are a bit dumb I'm altogether very new in bl fandoms so don't have a lot of ideas.

Oh, Anon. I don’t think you know what you’ve signed up for here. If you want a FK primer, I can give you a FK primer!

Both First and Khaotung started working for GMMTV back in 2018. I’m pretty sure talent agents simply slid into their DMs, so there was no formal audition process, but I could be wrong about that. They were both in university at the time. I’m not quite sure what they were doing that attracted the attention of the talent agents. I know First had been in at least one commercial prior, but I don’t believe Khaotung had done any acting. He had, however, had a picture go viral because he’s just so stinkin’ adorable. I think maybe this one?

Or it could have been one of these…

Either way, they ended up in an acting workshop together right after they joined. Khaotung talks about how he didn’t like First at first because he was too friendly and talkative, but I think that must have only lasted for like a day because it was during this same workshop where he discovered that his heart beats to the sound of First’s name—“FirFirFir”—and yes, that is a real thing that he has admitted out loud on multiple occasions. They have been best friends ever since.

From there, the two of them began to act in individual projects—mostly BLs—and although I have no proof of this, I am entirely convinced that they were playing a long con to get themselves partnered together. They did way more fanservice before they were partnered than they do now. Feel free to watch this live from 2020 where they alternate between staring lovingly in each other's eyes and just outright flirting for an hour straight.

Look, they’re smart boys. They knew that their best path to success in this industry was to be in a fixed pair and they wanted that pair to be each other. How do I know? Because these two adorable idiots were showing up to events in matching outfits.

This picture was taken in January 2021 when Tonhon Chonlatee was actively airing! There's a picture from this same event of them with Podd, who Khao was paired with, and Podd looks like the odd man out.

They were finally paired together for The Eclipse in 2022 and spent the entire press tour either talking about how excited they were to finally work together or crying about the possibility that they might never be able to work together again. I would highly recommend you watch The Eclipse special episode if you haven’t already. In it, First talks about how there was one scene where Khao wasn’t supposed to cry but he kept crying anyway because First was crying and he cared about First so much.

And speaking of crying, if you want to watch a compilation of FK crying about how much they love each other (and other things!), you can find that here.

One thing I would recommend if you want to get to know FK better is to watch a bit of Safehouse Season 4. It’s unscripted, so you’ll get a sense of their personalities, but First was also in an arm cast at the time, so you’ll get to watch Khao dote on him for seven days straight.

Oh and you have to watch this! If you ever see people talking about the voices in First’s head, that's why.

Obviously, we can never truly know what goes on behind closed doors for any of these BL couples, but I feel pretty confident in saying that FirstKhao are genuine besties. They literally do everything together. You can find a collection of some of their lovestagram pics here although there are so many more now. It never stops.

Actual things they have said to each other un-prompted:

First to Khao: I want to build a house with the same fences as you.

Khao to First: As you grow up, you will meet many new friends. Leave them and stay with me.

I’m wracking my brain for anything else that feels important for a new fan to know and am coming up blank, but I’m sure I’ll probably think of something right after I post this. They’re both just super sweet individuals who have never been involved in any controversy and I think what people love most about them is just how much they care about each other. They’ve got that whole platonic soulmate thing going on and we're all super jealous.

#asks #first kanaphan #khaotung thanawat #firstkhao

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just-elena · 3 months

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I'm sorry if this has already been shared to Tumblrverse previously, I scrolled through #threshold day but didn't see it.

ANYWAY

The vagina museum has a say to this sacred occurrence, so there.

Text:

A very happy #ThresholdDay to all who celebrate. If you haven't yet read our analysis of whether Janeway and Tom Paris fucked when they were lizards, today is the perfect day!

OLD THREAD REPOST

On 29th January 1996, "Threshold", the Star Trek: Voyager episode where Captain Janeway and Tom Paris turned into giant space newts and had babies first aired. Since it's #ThresholdDay we aim to answer a burning question: did Paris and Janeway fuck? If so, how did they fuck?

In attempting to answer the question as to whether Janeway and Paris fucked, and how they did it, we're going to mostly focus on salamanders, because the weird space amphibians they become are often described as "salamanders" and they look kinda like salamanders.

The first thing you need to know about amphibians is that they don't have genitals per se. As amphibians, Janeway and Paris had cloacas: a multipurpose hole for pee, poo and reproduction.

Salamanders are interesting because different species employ different strategies for fertilisation. Some use external fertilisation: Janeway plops her eggs out, Paris fertilises them. Some practice internal fertilisation, which we'll get onto later.

If Janeway and Paris engaged in external fertilisation, they would have undertaken a manoeuvre called amplexus. Tom Paris would have come up behind Captain Janeway and embraced her with his forelimbs. They would position their cloacas close together.

When Janeway released her eggs, Paris would have released sperm over them. Amplexus can last for hours.

Essentially, Janeway and Paris went tantric.

However, most salamanders don't do amplexus. Fertilisation would happen inside Janeway's body before she laid her eggs. This isn't achieved by penetration. It's much weirder.

If the fertilisation was internal, Tom Paris would have deposited a parcel of sperm called a spermatophore, and then Captain Janeway would pick the package up with the lips of her cloaca to take it into herself.

That sounds reasonably contact free, right? So why are Janeway and Paris so embarrassed about what happened at the end of the episode?

Welp, there's a lot of courtship rituals which would have happened before Janeway picked up Paris's cum parcel with her pee-poo hole lips.

Salamanders court: it's in Tom Paris's interests to make sure Janeway chooses to pick up his package of sperm. Salamander courtship typically involves seduction and dancing.

Tom Paris would have wafted pheromones at Janeway, and then the two of them would have engaged in some dance moves, first with Paris turning round to deposit his sperm package, then Janeway turning to pick it up.

In some salamanders, the pheromone exchange is as simple as Tom Paris fanning his tail at Captain Janeway so she can get a whiff and get in the mood for collecting his sperm package. Sometimes it's a bit kinkier.

If they took a lead from Desmognathus, Paris would drag his teeth down Janeway's neck and back while releasing pheromones, getting his horny chemicals straight into her bloodstream.

If they took a lead from Plethodon shermani, Paris would slap Janeway's snout.

Ultimately, there would have been seduction, close contact dancing, tail straddling and possibly a bit of kink. So that's presumably why Janeway, Paris and pretty much the entire Voyager crew are absolutely mortified and the entire sorry interlude is absolutely never mentioned again.

At the end of the episode, human again, Paris apologises for the salamander sex but Janeway points out that in many species, the female initiates the intercourse. Is that true?

In general, the way salamander sex is talked about, the male is doing everything he can to persuade the female to pick up his spermatophore. He's the active one and the female is passive. A 2020 literature review suggests this is not the case: the female is an active participant.

Ultimately, Janeway was probably quite right in admitting her responsibility in having salamander sex with her pilot, and that she *chose* to pick up his little parcel of jizz and have his space abomination babies.

Thank you for reading. We're sorry.

/end text

Source: the Vagina Museum official Mastodon account. Original thread here.

#star trek #star trek voyager #threshold #threshold day

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mimicmockingbirds · 1 year

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OK, but hear me out

Say Ride the Cyclone were to be adapted into a film; imagine how much fun it would be to see it animated.

Because for the main plot, like the intro song and the mostly dialogue scenes in limbo, you could easily do a stylistic, but still grounded in realism style that a lot of modern animated projects are doing right now (think Arcane or Into the Spider Verse). But once each of the kids go into their respective songs/fantasies for what their life could have been? What if those were done in completely different styles?? Imagine the additional, visual storytelling that would tell about who they are as characters?

Like say, for Ocean's number, WTWN, everything became more simplified, and the characters (especially Ocean herself) turned into a more rounded, chibi-like style to enhance just how cutesy and likeable she's trying to portray herself throughout that number.

Or for Noel's Lament, everything goes black and white, and the characters become even more 2D stylized, and the film scales down to a smaller millimeter frame, more reminiscent of cartoons from the early 20's, when animation was just starting out, to enhance his idealization of "the olden days" (as Ocean puts it).

Mischa's song, This Song is Awesome could be animated with a more choppy frame rate, and the character designs turn a little more jagged around the edges, kind of like animated music videos (I'm thinking a Gorillaz band vibe). But as he transitions into singing about Talia, the colors start to bleed out over their lineart, and become more paint-like and Talia herself moves like a rotoscoped character (think Loving, Vincent that came out a few years ago) to enhance the sense that she's somewhere between a real person and a fantasy Mischa's built in his mind.

Ricky's song would, of course, be stylized after those sci-fi cartoons from the 90's, like X-Men or Captain Planet.

For the Ballad of Jane Doe, I would love to see something like what Wolfwalkers did back in 2020, where most of the characters (in this case, the other kids) are for the most part, animated like traditional, 2D characters with very clean lines and neat movements, whereas Jane herself stands out for having messier, sketchy line art, and looks more and more unfinished in her animation as the song goes on, because she can feel more and more of her own identity being lost.

Constance's Sugar Cloud I could see done in the classic 2D Disney style (i.e., the Renaissance era of Disney, like the Lion King or Little Mermaid days) because not only is it really smooth and colorful and just all around nice to look at, but it reminds the average moviegoer of their childhood growing up with those movies (among others, obviously), which ties in nicely with Constance's preceding monologue about remembering her own life, and the good that came with the bad.

I'm even tempted to envision the first half of the finale song in a different style, when the stage production would show a quick projection of Jane/Penny's life after she returned to the world of the living. Imagine watching this animated film, and for that segment alone, it becomes that really hyper-realistic, almost uncanny valley CGI animation style, to show that she really has joined the world of the living, i.e. our world, among us, the living breathing movie goers watching this, and watching the other kids still in limbo fade back to that main art style for the final number.

I don't know; it just feels like something that would be so engaging to see from an already compelling storyline and characters. Especially with more experimental animation projects on the rise right now

#random rambling #Ride the Cyclone #Ocean O'Connell Rosenberg #Noel Gruber #Mischa Bachinski #Ricky Potts #Jane Doe #Penny Lamb #Constance Blackwood #idk I just really love animation you guys #so naturally I have to bring my latest hyperfixation into that world #might even sketch these different styles #for a better visual idea #but I haven't done any sketches in a hot minute #so who knows

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rabbitsrams · 3 months

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I'm just leaving a request for when you get to it absolutely no rush but pls more lunch club schlatt im feral for him

absolutely anon <3 i love this sm!! will be about meeting him at a party the m*sfits (unfortunate) were hosting in los angeles circa early 2020 era <3

i've written a lot about lc schlatt a lot already but idgaf i love writing more <3333 this turned into a whole fic hehe

nsfw under the cut, minors dni!! 18+ only.

you were dragged along by a friend who was invited by their friend. because they had to go to a huge youtuber party and you weren't gonna let them go alone.

the house is HUGE, wasn't a surprise that you lost the group as soon as you went inside. you decide to wait by the drinks on the off-chance someone you know would show up. none of your friends did, but someone else did.

out of all the creators you watched who were at this party, you were a casual fan of jschlatt's content. you were around when he did a face reveal, shocked that he was this cute guy your age instead of a 45-year-old man (it's the voice, sue me).

even in the darkness, you recognized him. you were too stunned to say anything as he grabbed the only water bottle in the area.

"you, uh... you want anything?" he asks. that voice. that voice you've only heard through headphones was now two feet in front of you. you shake your head.

"i, uh, i don't feel comfortable getting drunk at a party where i don't know anyone." you say, looking down at your hands.

"fair enough. uh... ah fuck, i got the last water, 'm sorry."

"i-it's fine," you take a deep breath. "uh, a-are you jschlatt? your voice sounds really familiar."

he chuckles. "yeah..."

"oh wow," you laugh. "i knew it."

it's silent for a moment before schlatt pipes up again. "d'ya know anyone here?"

"i came with my friend, who is nowhere to be found. their friend apparently knows whoever is hosting and got us in."

"ah," he takes another sip of water. "you can't find your friend?"

you shake your head. "whatever. they'll only find me if they need a ride home. i don't care anymore." you grab a can of beer and walk away from the drink table, trying to find a quiet place to stay. schlatt follows you for a moment before taking you to his room upstairs.

it's a breath of fresh air. the music is muffled and schlatt's temporary room is spacious and (mostly) clean. he invites you to sit on the bed with him and you continue your conversation from earlier. he's actually a lot nicer than you expected him to be (considering his online persona). and he's even cuter in person.

soon enough you find yourself leaning in to kiss him. he's a bit nervous and doesn't kiss you back.

"sorry. i, uh, never kissed anyone before." he confesses.

"that's okay. i've only kissed one other person and it's been a while since that happened." you say. that makes him relax a little. he cups your cheek and leans in, hesitantly pressing a soft kiss to your lips. you pull him closer, moaning softly as you put your hands in his hair. he whines.

you pull away. schlatt's face is tinted red and hints of your lipstick are all over his lips. "i, uh, wow..." he murmurs. you smile, moving closer and straddling him. he's already rock-hard underneath you. "s-sorry..."

"oh my gosh, don't be, it's okay." you grind your hips down, feeling his dick twitch in his jeans.

"h-honey, please... 'm gonna... b-bust. w-wanna do it i-inside ya..." he whimpers. you nod, removing your dress and panties. he kicks his jeans and boxers off. he leans to the left, opens a drawer and takes out a condom.

"oh thank god, i was prepared to go out and ask for one," you giggle. schlatt doesn't respond, grabbing your hips and pulling you on top of him. you ease yourself inside him, and before you can start moving, he groans loudly.

"fuck, 'm so sorry."

"did you..."

"yeah."

"oh."

"w-wait, i don't wanna leave you hangin'," schlatt says. he helps you lay next to him. "can i touch you?"

"y-yes... please..." you whine. he coats his fingers with your wetness before slowly sliding them inside you. you clench around him, whining as he begins thrusting them in and out of you. he rubs your clit with his other hand and before long, you're coming all over his fingers.

"fuck, that was... so good..."

"yeah? it wasn't too, uh..."

"totally fine. uh, we can always do it again, dunno how long you'll be here but um... i can give you my number."

"yeah?"

"yeah."

after you both clean up and get dressed, you exchange phone numbers. the party is slowly dying down. your friend texts you that they don't need a ride so you leave. as you drive back, you get a message from schlatt, already eagerly asking for your next meeting.

#jschlatt x reader #jschlatt imagine #jschlatt fanfiction #schlatt x reader #jschlatt x you #jschlatt x y/n #jschlatt smut #schlatt smut #schlatt x you #schlatt x y/n #schlatt imagine #schlatt fanfiction #schlatt fanfic #jschlatt fanfic

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choicesficwriterscreations · 1 month

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April Creator of the Month: Aallotarenunelma

Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is the lovely @aallotarenunelma! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page. Past COTM's can be found here.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog My Masterlist

How do you want to be known on Tumblr?

Aallotar is fine. I am agender. My pronouns are they/them.

More below...

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?

I saw the app being highlighted a lot in Google Play in 2017, but it was only at the end of February-beginning of March 2018 that I downloaded it. It was when Perfect Match 1 started releasing and shortly before Bloodbound 1 began releasing. Time is flying!

There were already a lot of books, and it was a bit overwhelming. I chose the series that was being heavily advertised: The Royal Romance.

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined the Choices sub-Reddit in July 2019, then the Tumblr fandom in April 2020.

I first joined the sub because I wanted to discuss the books and the characters, and hopefully befriending other players. It was lonely to read the books, and having no one to share my opinions and theories with. Then, I took a step back from it and after lurking a bit, I joined the Tumblr community.

3- How did you pick your blog name?

When I joined Tumblr, in April 2020, it was initially to be a Writblr. I was writing a story about a heroine named Aallotar. Its title gave my blog’s URL. My blog’s title is its English translation: Aallotar’s dream.

In the end, my blog turned into a bit of everything.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!

This is my very first post. This is my original writing, conveniently mentioned right above. :)

5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both?

I define myself as an artist because I create. This is how I express myself. It doesn’t matter if the pencil I use is to write or to draw as long as I create. Before I started learning how to draw, I was always saying that I was drawing with words. To me, this is what writing is. I draw and paint with my words to depict stories that my characters want me to tell.

I mostly write, but I also create fan art, such as sketches and various kinds of edits: quotes, sprites, moodboards, etc.

6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?

For the defunct app Lovestruck, from December 2020 to October 2021.

For Choices, since April-May 2020.

7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?

My all-time favourite Choices book is Veil of Secrets. I adore it!

I heavily create for the It Lives Anthology - the three books - and also for Immortal Desires. I love these books so much that I made a crossover, and most of the characters from the Anthology and from ID have met and even befriended each other.

8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?

My first Choices fiction is a Blades one: Of Stardust and Light.

I still love it and I wouldn’t change anything - except the typos and the clumsy grammar/syntax, due to the fact I am not an English-native speaker.

For a long time, I thought it was my masterpiece, that I wouldn’t write something as good or even as better than this. But I proved myself wrong in the end.

The other reason why I wouldn’t rewrite it now is because I have definitively stopped writing for my Blades pairing, Tyril x Soile. I made it official a few months ago, and this decision is final.

9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created?

It’s really hard to choose only one, but I do have a soft spot for Répondez, S’il Vous Plaît ! #3 because this is where I tell about my OCs’ Ash and Skylar’s meeting. It was a story I wanted to write for a long time and I love it.

Chronicles of a Crimson Summer deserves to be mentioned as well. This is the longest story I have shared here, and it’s a real balance of angst, fluff, and funny moments. Also, because its birth was extremely painful, so for all of these reasons, I am glad I wrote it and shared it.

10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?

I never expect anything I share to be well received, whether it’s a fiction or a drawing. I’m only sharing it, hoping that at least someone will find it and enjoy it. Even better if it helps the person in any way.

That said, sharing my art remains a lot more difficult than sharing my writing, so any art reblog is leaving me a bit confused, due to my imposter syndrome.

Most people here who are familiar with my stories have read some of the funny stories I have shared, as well as the fluffiest stories I have ever written - sometimes too fluffy for me.

However, this isn’t only what my writing is about. Darker Than Night has generated so much indifference that it saddens me.

This series really shows what my writing is, minus the layer of humour that you can usually expect. It truly deserves better, just like In Joy and Sorrow, that actually gives a good idea of what my writing really is.

11- (WRITERS) If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

I usually share a lot of fluff here, because the world outside is hard, so I want to uplift people with sweet and funny stories. However, my original writing is usually angsty with some funny and fluffy moments to alleviate all the angst a little. So, I’m choosing angst. Definitely. To me, writing angst is comforting.

11a - (ARTISTS) If you could only draw one style or type of art for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?

I could easily do oil pastels for the rest of my life. It’s an easy technique to learn, it’s very forgiving, it’s calming, and I love how it looks.

12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

I am agender and aspec, so in any non-binary and/or aspec MC / OC of mine can be found parts of me, regardless of how they define themselves on those large spectrums. Representation is highly important to me, so this is one of the recurring themes in my writing.

Also, the witty/sarcastic and playful characters are easy to write because I know them too well!

13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?

Finding the right word is difficult, either in English or in my native tongue. I always want to capture the emotion, the feeling, the landscape with the perfect word. I’m still learning in my daily life.

Regarding my art, at the level I am right now, that would be shadows. Sometimes, they look great, but they often don’t. Practice makes perfect, so this is what I do whenever I can.

14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

I tend to have only one WIP that I see to end. One reason for this is that I usually write my stories in a notebook, before I type them down to share them. The state of the notebook is not always great; I even sometimes struggle to re-read what I corrected!

If it’s about my original work, then, yes, I want to finish that one novel’s second draft.

15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first?

It has actually happened with one of my siblings. At that time, I was only writing for Blades and had maybe like five stories posted. I let my sibling read them because we are close. For other people, I think it would be on a case-by-case basis, but most likely not. I'd rather make them read my original writing, if my shyness isn’t getting in the way.

16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?

Émile Zola and Arto Paasilinna are my all-time favourite writers.

I am learning from every fanfiction writer I am reading. First, because I read in a foreign language. Second, because I believe you learn from everyone every day.

In terms of art, I don’t think I have a particular influence. I am still exploring my style.

17- (WRITERS) Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series?

It would be In Joy and Sorrow. I created this It Lives in the Woods AU series to give a life to my first MC, Riikka. The one she couldn’t have. In this series, I talk about close friendships, coming outs, being bilingual/bicultural, how to navigate a romantic relationship as an aspec*, how to deal with bullying/harassment, etc. I talk about timeline collapse and time-travelling as well.

And because there’s the most delightful OC ever, my all-time favourite: Ash. He truly is one of a kind and his friendship with Dan is really something special.

*aspec: a person on the aromantic and asexual spectrums.

18 - (ARTISTS) Which one of your creations would you like to see a fiction written about?

I don’t have any yet that would justify the honor of having a fiction being written about.

19- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art?

I started writing when I was 10 years old. It was thanks to an assignment for my native tongue class when we were studying the structure of a fairytale. I really enjoyed writing one, so I kept writing over the summer. Little stories about everything and nothing.

I wrote my first novel when I was 13, but never dared to send it to a publisher. I kept writing novels - and not sending them, I have a nice collection, now! - and branching out in other forms of writing, in hope to develop as a writer: rpg forums, poetry, (fan)fictions, creative writing course, etc. I took a ten year break from writing (fan)fictions before returning to them.

I am working on the second draft of a novel about grief, and I have three other different novels already outlined.

Regarding art, I mostly create non-fandom art.

20- What other hobbies do you have?

Except writing and drawing; I paint murals and do oil pastel; I do theatre; I design and crochet my own clothes.

I enjoy watching old films, Hollywood era and silent ones included, but modern films as well, if they are excellent.

I love learning foreign languages, listening to music and going to gigs.

I am also a true race car enthusiast, preferably Formula races - F1 to F4, Formula Regional included.

I also enjoy going for walks in nature and travelling.

21: Tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I want to thank CFWC for highlighting me, and giving me the chance to talk more about my characters, my stories, my writing and my art. This means a lot, especially as this month is also when I’m celebrating my 4 year Tumblr Anniversary.

Thank you for your support throughout these years!

I want to thank so many people, but I’m also scared to miss any of them!

Thank you to my friends, old and new. 💛

Thank you to everyone who has read and reblogged my stories and left kudos and comments on them. It has been helping me so much in believing in myself and my writing.

Thank you to everyone who has reblogged my art and my edits and left comments on them.

Thank you to every talented person who has gifted me a piece of their beautiful art, written or not, anonymously or not.

Thank you to everyone who has asked about my characters and my stories.

Thank you to everyone who has sent me positive and uplifting messages.

Lastly, thank you to every single person who has supported me these past months, in many different ways. Your kindness and your presence have made a difference, and I am grateful for those and for you all.

And a special shoutout to my fellow rainbow creators! 🌈

#choices fic writers creations #cfwc creator of the month #choices stories you play #playchoices #aallotarenunelma #choices #choices fanart #choices fanfic #april creator of the month #playchoices fanfic #playchoices fanart

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faetaiity · 1 year

Text

my brain somehow decided that I need to use the rest of my active braincells to do this, Hyperfixations are wild when you write, man. I also feel like I need to explain this because I overthink

Basically, what's about to go down in this post: Adult! Platonic/Familial Yandere! 1987, 2003, 2012, Bayverse and Last ronin! TMNT x Male! ROTTMNT! Reader (With slight Familial Yandere! from them for the Rise! Turtles)

the ages are mostly bullshit/made up in this ig except for Ronin! Michelangelo because he's canonically 31 or older

Reader is the same age as ROTTMNT! Michelangelo (Birthyear: 2005)

This is set during 2020, a few months after the Kraang Invasion. (The ROTTMNT ages are color-coded: 17, 16, 16, 15 and 15. every other iteration of the TMNT are implied to be 20-26, with an exception for Ronin! Michelangelo)

Why did I explain the premise? Because I want to make sure you guys understand. THIS. IS. NOT. ROMANTIC. and If I see anyone who adds more to this story or makes jokes about the OLDER turtles being attracted to the reader (Illegal due to Reader being a Minor.) or the ROTTMNT turtles (Illegal due to the Rise! Turtles being minors and being related to them.), you're getting blocked. no questions.

Minor Notes: While this is platonic, I understand if someone misinterprets some of the HC's due to the fact that each family is different with affection, some (like mine) make me feel guilty if I don't cuddle/hug them, some of this is inspired by my own family, Familial yandere writers (or at least me lol) tend to make stories relate to their own experiences with their family, If you read this and complain that it has 'romantic' aspects (which, affection isn't even exclusively romantic what??), I'm going to get a little mad since this is my experience with family, lol.

TW/CW: minor(?) Spoilers for The Last Ronin, Kidnapping, Abuse (Physically and mentally from 'Punishments'), manipulation, guilt tripping, possible gaslighting(?), Implied Murder, Infantilization, Stalking, Mentions of Panic attacks, stress tics (scratching/clawing at the skin), Yandere Behavior, Obsessive/Possessive Behavior, Extreme Overprotective behavior, OOC Older TMNT Iterations (Specifically 1987! and Bayverse!), Forced Affection, Surprise Adoption from the older versions of your best friends, mentions of Scars, missing limbs and Trauma from Rise! Shredder and Rise! Kraang (reader is mentioned to have scars and a missing eye) (Yeah that's long as shit because this post is probably gonna be long as shit)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On a scale from 1 to 10 my friends, you're FUCKED /ref

Now I'm gonna start off with you meeting them a specific way and branch out to more options down the line.

Donnie ended up making a machine that COULD send someone or an object across to a separate universe if he was correct.

Unfortunately, you ended up getting sucked up into the Machine-Made portal due to being close to it

To make this easier on my brain, let's say the other iterations of the turtles are already together, through a similar device that was used by the Kraang/Utroms

And your dumbass landed right in the middle of a huge argument between Ronin! Michelangelo and 2003! Raphael

Everyone freezes, including you, they LOOK like your best friends but are clearly not, there's differences between them and your friends, height is a big noticeable difference that tips you off.

Weapons are drawn almost instantaneously, multiple different sets of Katanas, Nun chucks, and Sai's are pointed at you

And oddly, just as quickly as they raised their weapons, they put them back down

In their minds, they quickly draw together than you're unarmed and a lot younger than they are

You get up on your legs, unsure of how to respond to them, you remember the photos of you and your turtles on your phone

You slowly pull out your phone, knowing they could mistake it for a weapon, you scroll through your phone until you find the photo of you, Donnie and Leo in Run of the Mill Pizza, they calm down at the sight of it

They sheathed their weapons, studying your body warily, you feel weirded out at the fact that they haven't said anything; you could understand that behavior from Donnie or Raph, but not the other two

You swallow your nervousness and shakily say "I'm [Y/N]"

You notice one of the Michelangelo's runs right up to you, clearly excited at the Idea of someone from another universe that isn't in theirs

He noticed your eyepatch as soon as he gets up to your face and winces "Jeez, what happened to your eye?" he blurts out, Surprisingly, Leo smacks upside the head, Mikey mutters out a small apology, you laugh softly, not taking offense to it

They all introduce themselves with the year they're from and their age, you immediately notice all of them are adults

They're already wincing at your scars from life-threatening injuries and clearly injured or missing eye, but they just kind of.... freeze when you say "Wow! You guys are a lot older than My versions of y'all!"

They stay quiet for a second before you embarrassedly mumble out: "Oh... I'm sorry, that was rude of me" you avert your eyes

2012! Leo is the first one to speak "No... Offense taken; we were just caught off guard.... how old are you and your versions of us?" "Oh! Well Raph's 17, Leo and Donnie are 16, Me and Mikey are 15"

Silence, before Bayverse! Raphael bursts out laughing "I'M THE OLDEST?!" clearly, he's happy at that, and so are the other Raphs, apparently, since you can see their smirks at their respective Leos, who frown

You nod nervously, his volume scaring you slightly, He noticed you flinching and quiets down

Your age kind of takes a minute for them to process, considering your scars made them assume you're a little older, they end up asking you when you got the scars

"Oh! The giant scar is from the Shredder, the missing eye and the other smaller scars are from the kraang!" you breathed out for a few seconds, calming yourself down from remembering those unhappy situations "I got the big one when I was 13, everything else happened a few months ago."

They all.... look at you in a weird manner, it was a mix of pure anger, pity, and.... self-loathing, oddly enough? "Ah, I'm sorry if I reminded you guys of any..... unhappy situations..." you shyly said, they stayed quiet, feeling uncomfortable with the stares, you changed the subject "I need to be able to get back home! Donnie's probably freaking the absolute fuck out by now"

Ronin! Michelangelo takes initiative to tell you that you are welcome here as long as it takes, the others nod, you thank them all profusely

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It scares all of them over the next few weeks when you'd tell them stories about your adventures, they've come to understand that, well, in a blunt way, you and their younger counterparts clearly aren't able to take care of yourselves

And they've actually come to loathe Rise! Splinter, they've come to understand that their dad wasn't the best, but it makes their blood boil at how badly it can be for you and the Rise! Turtles.

Even they didn't fight the Shredder at that age!

However, they do feel a little better knowing you five defeated him, but not by much considering how close you all were to dying

especially you.

I'm gonna be honest, there is three ways it can go when your friends come to bring you back to your Universe

1: The other iterations come back with you guys, being delusional in the fact that you guys can't take care of yourselves

2: They don't let you go back with them, and they tell the Rise! Turtles to leave (This would be most likely if you share unfavorable stories of the Turtles, while forgetting to add where you guys talk it out or the reason why it happened, they become very attached to you specifically in the few weeks they've known you!)

3: (This is the one we will be explaining in this Post) They keep all of you in the Universe that you fell into. (This is the one most likely to occur due to ROTTMNT! Reader and Turtles are injured severely from the Kraang Invasion)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It is not a good time for the first few weeks, You and your best friends fight tooth and nail at every point through them keeping you guys

They're beyond delusional, chalking it up to teenage rebellion and the nature of the Rise! Turtles

You five end up being locked up in a room, a few hidden cameras being placed in there

y'all aren't allowed out usually (and NEVER out of the lair) since to the Older! Turtles, you five are ungrateful brats who can't think for themselves

You and Mikey are babied, you two are the youngest and have been through so much!

It's suffocating

They always want to be near you, because in their words "You're the one who needs protection the most"

Donnie is allowed keep his battle shell due to the nature of his species (Also because they don't know about all the weaponry in it)

There isn't much room for escape, almost none, actually

17 Adult Mutant Ninja Turtles guarding the lair, at least 2 home at all times?

yeah, good luck, even Rise! Donnie is stumped.

In order of Importance (Most to Least) It's You and Mikey, Leo, Donnie and then Raph

Donnie and Raph are mostly ignored because they suffered the least number of injuries, and they're the oldest.

Previous Leos don't approve of yours, saying he's not Mature or Serious enough, often taking him for training/sparring

Don't let that fool you, your Leo has come back in worse shape than he was to begin with, often coming back trying to hide his tears, you guys stopped letting him go with them once it was found that his shell was starting to crack more. I wonder why

Donnie comes up with a plan to escape with Raph to regroup and find out how to get back home

and, to their credit, they manage to leave the lair, about 15 minutes later, Ronin! Mikey comes in, once he sees they're gone, he starts breaking objects in the room and yells at You, Mikey and Leo.

The others quickly come in and try to pull Ronin! Mikey away, which he resists until he sees you having a panic attack, Rise! Mikey trying to console you and Rise! Leo in a defensive position, around you

He leaves the room and announces that he's going to find them, some of the other turtles try to get near you to comfort you but Leo isn't letting it happen, he actually tries to attack one of them, making them back off

Oh, Raph and Donnie are fucked, by the way.

Now, Lemme tell you WHY you never want a Yandere! Ronin! Mikey hunting you down

He's the oldest, the most skilled and canonically in the books, the mutagen that is still in his system makes him stronger, bigger and more durable, plus the trauma of losing his brothers has made this situation strike a nerve with him.

he could probably break Rise! Raph's leg

Which he does.

About an hour or two later, he comes back with them, they're both knocked out, Raph's leg is bent unnaturally, and Donnie's Battle shell is ripped to shreds and he has bruises all over him.

Ronin! Mikey comes in and throws them back into the room, Donnie's battle shell in his hands "Found out the main reason why he wanted that damn thing to stay on his back." he stated bluntly, pointing at the drone wings and the spider-like claws, giving it to 2003! Donnie, who marvels at it

You're picked up by one of them, Rise! Leo starts freaking out and trying to get you away from them, until someone else enters the room and keeps him away until you're out

You're placed in a separate room, fearing that they're going to hurt you, you try to cover your head, curling into a fetal position, separation anxiety already kicking in due to the circumstances.

You feel someone rub your back reassuringly, making you cry and hyperventilate more.

"Hey, hey, you're okay, nobody's going to do anything to you" you whimper as you hear 1987! Raph attempt to calm you down

he tells you that you being taken away is the Rise! Turtles' punishment, and that nothing is going to happen to you

"What about My friends?" you sob out, he doesn't respond, he just pulls you close to him and hugs you; you try to pull away only to hear him say "I'm trying to make you feel BETTER, stop resisting! don't you know how much effort we're putting in to help you five out?! To take care of you guys?!" his yelling makes you stiffen, allowing him to pull you back closer to him.

I'm gonna be honest, you get the least severe punishments compared to your turtle friends, you're weak, regardless of if you're human or mutated (Mostly because the mutagen hasn't improved your strength as much as it did theirs yet.), you're WEAK.

They could, especially Ronin! Mikey, end up KILLING you if they gave you the same punishments.

Very few mutations would even get the harsher punishments anyways, all of them being Reptilian or large Mammalians.

Humans, Insect mutants, Bird Mutants and other mutants that could get hurt easier due to their physiology get special treatment.

At worst your punishments leave you with shallow claw marks, maybe a fractured bone or two (This one was unintentional, though, just a testament to how much stronger they are compared to you.), bruises and panic attacks from separation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Awfully enough, they try to separate you from your friends on a regular basis

Saying your Raph might get a rage fit and hurt you, or your Mikey accidentally getting too excited and hurting you

Any excuse they can pull out of their ass to keep you away from them

They don't tell them where they keep you, of course

It's mostly in Donnie's lab though, where you spend time with them

Rise! Donnie isn't allowed in there because that's where they keep the Rise! Turtles' mystic weapons (Mainly studying them)

The only reason why you're never permanently kept from the Rise! Turtles is because you have panic attacks from being away from them, the Turtles also get hyper confrontational, even more so than usual when you're gone.

You always get returned by the end of the day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now, let's go onto say that you guys ACTUALLY managed to escape back to your universe through a sheer stroke of luck.

Staying that way is gonna be hard.

Donnie immediately destroys the portal, but that doesn't mean the others can't build their own

Depending on if you move to another part of the sewer again, is how likely you are to stay uncaptured

If you guys stay at the same spot, they'll find y'all in another few months

if y'all move maybe they won't find you guys.

Staying? They're going to find you guys in as little as a few weeks, but they won't immediately grab you guys

They stalk you five, they're delusional and try to rationalize why you five left.

Staying might be the initial response, you five come back down, hoping to see Splinter, but you just see those 17 figures, some covered in blood

"What did you do, WHAT DID YOU DO?!" your Leo would sob out, assuming the worst

All you five get back are cold stares

Instead of taking you back to the other universe, they stay here and keep you locked in your own home.

But they make sure that y'all can't leave for a while.

The turtles get broken bones, and you get a shock collar

If you think they were bad before, you haven't seen shit

They're always around you five now, never letting any of you out of their sight.

It's hell.

It's pure torture.

and they're never letting you guys go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn't go into as much detail as I would've liked, maybe this will be like a series idk??

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comradekatara · 2 months

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IDK if you're still giving your thoughts on AtLA ships but I would feel remiss if I didn't shoot my shot and pitch yuetara. I know on the surface this is going to immediate read like “yuekka but gay” except I FIRMLY reject the idea that the siblings are interchangable. They bring different dynamics to the relationship! and I love yuekka, don't get me wrong here, but for no fault of its own it suffers from only having a couple episodes to develop and a mostly cishet writing team doing a lot of “he's a guy and she a girl, could I make it anymore obvious?” doing a lot of the heavy lifting. WE know Sokka has a lot to offer as a partner, but from Yue's perspective Sokka is yet another man that vaults into her life and immediately wants [something from] her.

But Katara. Here she comes, granddaughter of the woman who rejected their status quo that is supposed to be there to keep them safe? And she Got Away with it, went on to lead a happy fulfilled life, and years later that granddaughter rolls right up to their master bender, an elder, A Man, one of the pillars holding up the system, and forming the bars of Yue’s cage as a physical representation that he was Wrong. And this girl spits his authority back in his face, tells him where to shove it, and somehow against every odd, she bends him to listen?? Can you imagine living your whole life being told that every part of you belongs to someone else, that you will never be a person before you're a daughter, wife, mother, princess, and then out of a clear blue sky on the day of your birth, where it's been announced you're about to change hands from one man to another, a girl just like you blows in like a typhoon, and says there's another way. Wouldn't you fall just a little bit madly in love with her?

Yue is shown that she CAN choose freedom for herself... and it makes her choosing duty in the end so much more meaningful? She could walk away. She was not born to be a prop and a sacrifice, no matter what even THE FUCKING MOON intended, she can be a whole person on her own. And ugh, the symbolism of taking up the mantle of the moonspirit so that KATARA can have her bending still!! The heartache of knowing now that everytime she bends, yue is RIGHT THERE. Literally to Moon and the OCEAN paralells FUCK.

Putting aside that korrasami crawled so that a lot of today's queer flavored kids media can even think about walking, I truly believe that if AtLA had been a product of the late 20teens or 2020’s that yuetara would have been THE ship. Anyway, sorry for the inbox blast, you're just the Katara conisuer and if you have thoughts I wanna hear em.

okay, to be clear, all of this is obvious to me. you make a compelling argument, but it’s hardly something I haven’t already considered when thinking about this ship.

however, there’s something very beautiful to me about yue’s story being a tragedy, and I think that while warping that narrative to be about feminist liberation through the power of lesbian love is obviously a noble goal, yue and sokka being two people who are confined and stifled by their respective obligations to patriarchal duty whose happiness is fundamentally impossible because neither of them can imagine a world beyond the bars of their cages is nonetheless far more interesting than a narrative wherein someone “rescues” yue from adhering to patriarchal standards and shows her a brand new world.

it’s actually very fascinating to me that sokka refuses to talk about himself, and whenever yue asks him questions about himself and his home, he is self-deprecating. besides his first attempt to claim that [by virtue of being the son of the chief] he is sort of like a prince himself, it’s clear that spending time in the nwt, who look down on their southern counterparts, wears on his self-esteem because he is predisposed to insecurity. you’re right in that katara is nothing like sokka. she wouldn’t be insecure, dismissive, cagey about her past, tacitly accepting of yue’s resigned obligation to her arranged marriage, or attempting to repress her feelings around yue. she would be bold, loud, confident, agentic, and willingly vulnerable, as she is with every potential love interest. perhaps their relationship would still end in tragedy, but it would be anything but quiet.

and if that kind of obvious bombast is what you want out of a romance, then fine, you do you. but personally, the beauty of yue’s role in the narrative to me is specifically how she foils sokka as someone who sacrifices, diminishes, and martyrs herself for the sake of her people. she literally has obligations to her tribe and to her father!!!!! she and sokka inform each other so beautifully because they are so similar and equally constrained by their perceived obligations and lack of agency.

the fact that sokka is who she gets close to whereas katara merely represents a sort of unattainable ideal to her is intentional, it’s part of the point. if yue is sokka’s moon, shining brightly above him but always out of reach, then katara is yue’s moon, kanna is yue’s moon, every woman who had the agency to liberate themselves from this system in which yue has no choice but to participate is her moon. and by becoming the moon, yue sacrifices herself, her humanity, her body, but she also liberates herself, frees herself from the contraints of being a woman in society. she kisses sokka to reclaim her agency, because kissing him as she had wanted to had been denied to her, and now that she is no longer bound to these earthly standards, she finally can.

yes, we are introduced to yue through sokka and not the other way around (i shouldn’t have to explain that that is how basic storytelling sequencing works), but yue is immediately interested in him, sees a kindred spirit in him, longs for him. maybe he is initially struck by her beauty, but he treats her with kindness and humanity, and he never asks for anything from her besides what she is willing to give him (which is the point. they’re at an impasse, and so their tragedy is inevitable. unlike suki, who is willing to take the lead and basically forces sokka into experiencing happiness lmfao). also, for the record, they already are a beautiful butch/femme couple. to me.

but yeah, if you really want to see a bold, courageous girl fight to liberate a repressed, abused girl from the clutches of patriarchal violence, you can just watch revolutionary girl utena free on youtube. in fact, you all should. it’s much better than atla.

#lizardlicks #asks #katara #yue #sokkaxyue #analysis #katara IS deeply important to yue #but it’s also very important to yue that her primary arc is with sokka #katara and aang both INSPIRE yue #but sokka ANGUISHES her #and personally. I love anguish :)#especially when it involves sokka :)

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lvckyyz · 4 months

Text

iris cabin headcanon

cabin’s song: mr. blue sky - electric light orchestra

iris is the goddess of the rainbow

so of course her children like colors

most of them had an Indie Kid phase in 2020/2021

they are really calm and pacific most of the time

however, they don’t like cabin 11 (because of their parents)

i believe Iris keeps contact with her children even though she’s not supposed to

and children of iris know all the gossip from chb and from the olympus

they make weird collections (muggs, cans, pens,…)

can be really sensible

mostly friends with cabin 7, 15 and 18

a lot of children of iris are good at archery

bad liars

extremely friendly

they’re never in trouble so some people end up not paying so much attention to them

most of them already dyed their hair at least once in their lives

i don’t know why, but I think children of iris suffer a lot with nightmares, so they have some dreamcatchers in their cabin

they love helping other people (probably do charity as well)

not into sports

they like handcrafting and are really proud of their works

they dream about traveling the world

sometimes they’re too honest

get offended easily

most of them have artistic talents

they don’t get nervous if they’re under pressure

usually insecure about their appearance (are always changing something)

a/n: thank youu for reading! guys if you have any ideas/request for me pls PLS tell me, cause i really don’t know what i’m going to do when i finish all the cabins😭

next: cabin 1 ⚡️

#cabin 14 #iris #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo tv show #pjo imagine #pjo hoo toa #pjo fandom #percy jackson #jason grace #nico di angelo #leo valdez #rick riordan #riordanverse #headcanon

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freddy-and-friends-au · 1 month

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The band’s all here! (WIP)

I still haven’t finished their new endoskeletons yet, but I think I have their suits mostly down!

Feel free to ask any questions you may have in the inbox!

EXTRA INFO AND SCREENSHOTS UNDER THE CUT!!!

At first glance, these are obviously inspired by the traditional Chuck E. Cheese x Rockafire Explosion suits, designing them more like sports mascot costumes and having very little of the endoskeleton showing at all times (say for Foxy, of course). This was not only for more realistic world-building, but also to optimize animation, as we now have less moving parts that are actually showing, and therefore, less to render.

You might be wondering “if you wanted a more realistic approach to the suits, why not take a more realistic approach to the masks, like a more ShowBiz Pizza style?” And to that I say: everyone does that.

Okay, that isn’t entirely the reason. I like the idea of basing the designs more off of the canon models than something that already exists, because I like the idea of FazEnt having their own style of making animatronics. The ShowBiz style isn’t the only way to do animatronic masks, and these masks are how FazEnt would go about making them. Even when FazEnt does use the trademark ShowBiz rubber-face masks on the Junior models, they don’t do it the same way that ShowBiz does it.

Something interesting I want to do with Freddy & Friends is to set narrative moments apart from the moments meant to be passed off as real footage. The designs shown above are for the latter, meanwhile the narrative will use more artistically stylized suits textured to more so resemble a comic book, sort of like Into The Spider-Verse (except instead of going for a generalized comic book feel, the Freddy & Friends style is gonna be more reminiscent of the Batman: Year One comic). The designs will be more reminiscent of how I draw them on paper, as opposed to being faithful to the canon.

Here’s some extra info as to how I came up with the designs, as well as some extra renders and concept art!:

Original concept art from September 30, 2020.

Freddy was a little obvious to design, probably because everyone seems to design him like this when making more cartoonish versions of him. A more defined tuxedo complete with a collar and cuffs with a red stripe around his hat. It just seemed like the right direction to go in.

Bonnie was initially intended to wear a vest, though I was holding out for something else so that he could be differentiated from the evil rabbit (the evil rabbit wears a vest). I asked my friends what I could change it to, and one of them said “Try a cardigan”. Honestly, that fits Bonnie’s personality so much better, both in terms of spirit and cartoon.

You might also notice that Bonnie was supposed to have buck teeth, as well as more squared off teeth. That was originally part of his V1 model, but when I tried applying that to the new models, literally any way I tried to arrange it made Bonnie look like so much like an insufferable asshole that I wanted to punch him in the face. Ultimately, I ended up ditching the buck teeth and just gave him his classic teeth.

Chica was a little hard to do something unique with at first. I initially wasn’t really sure what I wanted to do with her, but when I modeled her V1, her little chef’s hat was a last minute addition to her design. I’m also thinking about changing her bib into an apron, per the toon designs that Henry posted a while back.

Foxy was probably the most fun to design. Obviously, his final model has a lot of details inspired by the FNAF movie, but when I was designing him 4 years ago, I really just wanted to go crazy with his design. I wanted him to have a beard, I wanted him to have a peg leg (I really liked the idea of animating him with a limp). Unfortunately, I don’t know if I’ll keep the peg leg, because it might be a little too hard for Henry to animate with the tech that he has.

As a cheeky little reference to the roots of the FNAF fandom, I wanted Foxy’s hook to resemble the hook seen on the Splinks Foxy model. ;)

Endo01 - Version 4 WIP

I’ve done a few different versions of the endoskeleton. What I’m trying to do for this new one is to assemble him modularly, allowing me to make each component a recognizable component (they’re also actually modeled after real components).

I’m not gonna go into detail about the functionality of this guy, because I eventually plan to make a Freddy & Friends Instructional VHS series centered around being a mechanic for FazEnt. However, what I will say is that these designs are intended to have plausible functionality, especially using the technology of the 1980’s (which is not restricted to pneumatic technology, because making an animatronic walk with pneumatic actuators while maintaining the traditional complexity of animatronic endoskeletons is simply impossible).

EXTRAS:

The original Version 1 designs

My failed attempt at giving Bonnie buck teeth (I wanna punch him so bad…)

Fixed Foxy

???

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dorkfruit · 4 months

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i put this together using my computer's trackpad so the new year is already starting out . bad .

posts: J | F | M | A | M | J | J | A | S | O | N | D

template

reflections on the year, my plans for the future, some studies i did, and wips for the next year all down below for those who are interested

tldr; we will be ianthing next year so watch out!!

oh dear lord it's been another year. 2024! can you believe it! i don't talk much on this blog because i have a tendency to talk too much, but it's my little new year's treat, so here we go.

RECAP

i started taking drawing "seriously" in December of 2020, starting to do studies and stuff, and each year since i've ramped it up more and more. this year, i did. a lot of studies. there's probably like at least 200 more in my folder now (not including the 300 days worth of gesture drawings i did), with things like painting, faces, feet, poses, etc. anything i was struggling with, i went right into studying it. my art has been mediocre for a pretty long time now, and it's only the past few months where i feel i'm starting to get the hang of it, which is exciting!

more importantly, i started posting a lot more on this blog. i really like documenting my progress, looking on where i was before and seeing how i've improved. everytime i draw some fanart, im like, oooghh i can't wait to show my (: followers (: !! lots of locked tomb art of course. i've been trying to nail the energy of the different characters, which is why i enjoy books so much, because you get a lot of creative control. drawing ianthe is my fav of course, cause she's my lil nasty, but also i enjoyed doing designs for characters i hadnt thought about before, like judith.

in addition to the locked tomb, we had some new fandoms that got brief moments in between iantheposting: Fear and Hunger, Postal, Faith The Unholy Trinity, and a couple of old ones too, like We Have Always Lived In The Castle and The Merciless.

i posted about 115 times this year, although most of those are shitposts LOL i love posting stuff on my blog and showing people my stuff <3

THE FUTURE

my plans? do more ianthe art, of course. ill be working on more studies, probably going to work on developing a style, and figuring out how to paint. i'd like to do more actually finished pieces, but let's be honest, it'll still be mostly shitpost doodles. i'd like to do more weird stuff. i've been messing around with some gore and NSFW near the end of the year, and it's fun to draw for me. i like idk art that evokes some type of emotion, especially discomfort, and so i find that type of art fun to do, so if you don't enjoy what i've done thus far in that direction, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. i really like horror media, and so i want to do some stuff like that too.

for specifics, i like western type art, a comic book-esque style i'd like to aim for. but i'd like it to be a little more. weird with it. i find comic books often draw all the characters the same, and make all the characters traditionally attractive, and that's boring to me so i'll have to work on finding a way to keep things weird, while also appealing in a graphic sense. the worst thing my art could be is bland and forgettable.

locked tomb wise... more tridentarii art. need to be really weird with it. i have lots of wips planned, like i have a whole page worth of just thumbnails, so i wanna get some of those done. also i had a few animatics i wanted to do. mostly stupid shit, once i learn how to do animatics, then we'll do actual serious ones. id also like to do more comics. i have some comics storyboarded out with my girlies, i like telling a story so, need practice on that. id also like to develop a way to consistently draw them, for convenience sakes, so i'm not fighting for my life every single time i draw these characters. oh and i wanna do some outfit stuff. i draw them in like. generic clothes everytime but i'd like to come up with a few actual outfit designs, that i can just reference back to. and, of course, more shitposts. lots of stupid shit in 2024 for sure. there was something else i wanted to say here but i can't remember.

ART

oki enough rambling, here's some IMAGES for yall to look at i know everyone loves to look at images.

began this year by warming up with gesture sketches (almost) every day. i started with 20 poses (30 seconds each), and then in november i was like. ugh my hands suck i need to get better at hands, so i switched to doing 10 hand sketches (60 seconds each). i want my art to be very energetic so it's important that i do these !!

anatomy studies of extremities because i'm flopping at those -_- ive gotten better with hands but they're still a struggle. i hate feet tho still

need to get my painting game up. i joined an art forum to get advice, and the biggest suggestion i got was working on my values, so i did various value studies. also lots of faces because my faces flop !!

random doodles to work on drawing from imagination. on my "sketchbook" pages, as i like to call them, i'm usually pretty loose and messy, since the point is just to be drawing so often these will suck, but that's fine. i don't think very much when i draw faces on here either so they end up being in my Instinctive Style i suppose you could say

ianthe wip. i was planning to do a few drawings based on the idea of her having Missing Arm nightmares, but the lineart was intimidating to me so i haven't worked on this one more yet /: also there was going to be a toontown gay homosexual toxic yuri comic that i was gonna put here with it but the page is way too long so umm guess that'll have to wait.

...

anyways. thank you for reading if you got to the bottom of this! i appreciate all the support that i've been getting lately (extra big kissies for the same like 5 people who always reblog my posts youre the best). and we will be ianthing soo hard in 2024 so watch out!!

#and god bless. there is not a single background in any of these images. sketch on a white bg foreverz!!#my art #art meme #ianthe tridentarius #really got to tag her here bc . all this art is of her LOL

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mysterywheeze · 13 days

Text

what a weekend, huh

I've refrained from using this blog to share my thoughts on the [gestures vaguely] situation for- well, for a few reasons. For one, I haven't been directly involved in the fandom for a while for personal reasons (I will reiterate that I am Mostly Fine). For two, until today we didn't have an official update on the matter. And for three, there's been A LOT of vitriol within the fanbase, so saying anything felt like stepping into a minefield.

Point three still stands. But what the hell? I've thrown my thoughts into worse rings.

My opinions on the whole fiasco can be summed up in four points.

ONE: Their initial plan was bad, and the way they announced it was even worse.

I don't think I have to explain why cutting off a large number of low-income and international fans is a shitty thing to do. That the initial treatment of Patreon fans was poor is, I think, similarly self-evident. And not just because we weren't initially given free access to the streaming platform; the abrupt cancellation of WW+ and early access screwed a lot of annual-membership patrons over.

We now have confirmation that Watcher needed a new revenue stream to stay operational, and that the team viewed this change as essentially a last resort to avoid layoffs or worse. We did not get this information in the "Goodbye YouTube" video. The Watcher team could have been upfront from the beginning, but they decided not to be. Instead they hyped up the announcement, even had a countdown, leading us to think that this was a sign of something good, when in reality it was a sign of something dire.

I hope we can all agree that more initial transparency would have significantly improved the audience reaction to the announcement.

TWO: The update/apology video was a good one.

They addressed why they made their decision, admitted to their fuck-up, and changed their plan. That's Owning Up To Your Mistakes 101. What we got was a compromise; they aren't scrapping the streaming service altogether, but they aren't abandoning fans who can't afford it altogether, either. And of course, they've told us that the streaming service is necessary for the survival of the company. Better late than never.

There's still a lot that they need to do before they can fully gain my trust. And I say gain, not regain, because this isn't the first time they've had a business fumble (NOTE: this is not about the HWYD incident). From Patreon rewards coming months late to factual errors in their educational shows, to what I strongly suspect is mismanagement of funds leading to their current financial troubles, they've always had flaws that ought to be addressed.

But it's a start. A good start at that.

THREE: Some fans reacted to the announcement (and to a lesser extent, to the update) in deeply inappropriate ways.

Look, I don't think you have to ~deeply adore~ Steven Lim to be a Watcher fan. I'll admit that, as a diehard Unsolved fan since 2017 who rarely watched Worth It before 2020, Steven's shows appealed to me less than Ryan and Shane's content did. The average viewcounts of Steven's shows compared to Ryan-n-Shane's shows indicates that my preferences are pretty common.

That being said, as someone who isn't particularly enthused about Steven content, I can appreciate the things he's done for Watcher and as a human being. He's always been the guy pushing hardest for Asian-American representation, as Grocery Run, Hidden Narratives, and especially his response to the 2021 tragedy in Atlanta, made very clear.

From years ago to just last week, he's said some poorly-worded and even insensitive things. He's a human. We're prone to doing that.

If you think that it's okay to insult him on a personal level over this weekend's fiasco, to drag up an old mistake he already publicly apologized for, or to make unfounded accusations about his moral character, you are solely mistaken and have some serious maturing to do. If you actually partook in any of those activities, I sincerely hope that you regret your actions and avoid repeating them. And if you're one of those people STILL trying to pin all the blame on Steven, or even calling for his resignation(?!?)... I don't know what to tell you. I really hope you become a kinder person soon.

This also goes for people who started getting personal with the other members of Team Watcher, or with their friends or loved ones outside the company. So what if Sara had an imperfect take? She's not responsible for Watcher's bad decision, and we shouldn't be dragging her into the discourse just because she's married to a guy who did a fuck-up.

And yeah, Shane did a fuck-up. It ain't cute to act like he's an innocent anti-capitalist baby being dragged into this mess by Steven. Same goes for people saying Ryan didn't play a part in this, but over the past few days I've seen way more support for Shane among conspiratorial fans than for Ryan. I'm not going to act like racial bias is the only factor at play here, clearly it's more complex than that, but making up conspiracies to protect your white fave while scapegoating the outspoken-against-racism Asian guy... it's not a good look. You have to realize that and evaluate your biases.

FOUR: The backlash to the backlash has become excessive and unhelpful.

I get it. When people are being dicks online, it's natural to speak out against it. And boy howdy, were some people being dicks this weekend. Emphasis on the some.

Yes, there's been a lot of mean-spirited, unconstructive hate sent Watcher's way over the past few days. There's also been an incredibly large volume of constructive criticism from all corners of the fandom. Some of it's been discussed between fans, some of it's been shared directly with Team Watcher. It doesn't stick in your mind as strongly as blatant hate does, but I can assure you, it's there.

And in the effort to defend Watcher against that hate, a lot of you have made it really hard for good-faith criticism to be heard.

Seriously, every time I see someone on the Wiscord politely criticize one of Watcher's decisions, they're immediately shut down by a fellow fan. Same thing happened to me in an unofficial fan server earlier today. My good-faith critique wasn't as important as the fact that some asshole could hypothetically make a similar argument in bad faith. Any attempt at a calm, reasoned discussion of Watcher's issues as a company gets drowned out with blind positivity.

Let me make my stance crystal clear: people are allowed to be upset about things that they aren't being forced at gunpoint to pay for. That's like, the the basis of media criticism. "You don't HAVE to pay for it so you shouldn't complain about it" is not an argument that should be taken seriously here on Al Gore's internet.

There's also been a lot of disingenuous use of the "don't you believe artists should get paid?" argument, because yes I do, and yes they have been getting paid. By thousands of people at once - far more supporters than most working artists receive in a lifetime. I personally have been supporting them financially since January of 2020, literally since day one. Watcher's situation evidently isn't ideal, but as far as independent creators go they're pretty darn privileged to have the following they have.

And if you think that Team Watcher has actually totally been doing the right thing all along, then you're wrong. The guys at Watcher themselves admitted that. If they really are the bastions of honesty you're convinced they are, you'll accept that. Above all, the changes they announced today are not proof that "the bullies won". If the bullies won, there would be no streaming service. What happened was a compromise, and the assholes in this fandom didn't want a compromise.

Look, I know you guys. I remember the old days, when we weren't afraid to provide feedback to Watcher when they fucked up, and over much smaller fumbles than this recent one. I know we've all put a lot of money and time into this company and the people behind it. The sunk-cost fallacy is a very powerful thing. But please don't let your hatred for bullies and love for the boys completely blind you to valid criticism. You can't entirely shield them from growing pains if what you want for them is real growth.

FIVE: This isn't a real point in the list I just had to separate my closing thoughts from the rest of the essay I accidentally wrote. Whoops.

The other day, I saw somebody (can't recall their handle, sorry) describe some fan reactions to Friday's announcement as "post-divorce honesty". It's far from the only comparison to a breakup I've seen. That phrase has been ringing in my head for a while now. Because this situation has made a lot of people reevaluate what they like about Watcher, why they became a fan in the first place, and if it's worth sticking around.

Watcher made a mistake. One that they could walk back but can't undo. Their reputation is never going to be the same as it was before. Likewise, a lot of fans said things that can't be taken back, and now that's tied to their reputation in our community. I can't blame anyone for feeling uneasy right now.

Hm. When I started writing this, I had an actual ending in mind. I don't know where that went.

Maybe that's the note I end this massive ramble on? Watcher's future is uncertain, the community's future is uncertain, so I'm uncertain about the last part of this post...? Agh. There's a reason why I'm more of a fiction writer than an essayist. It's getting late, I've got stuff to do tomorrow, and my browser's beginning to slow down from the sheer weight of my draft being open for so long.

Just... try to take it easy on each other, okay? It's been a hell of a week, and we haven't even finished Monday yet.

#watcher #ryan bergara #steven lim #shane madej #good lord. we all gotta sleep.

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