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heartsforhavik · 5 months

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yandere mk1 men x compliant! reader

warnings: kidnapping, mentions of violence and murder, stockholm syndrome, all men are yandere and ooc, implied afab reader in johnny's, implied nsfw in bi-han's, mentions of an anxiety attack in zeffeero's, tomas is a masochist, gender neutral reader, reader doesn't care that they were kidnapped

summary: the mk1 men (johnny cage, bi han, kuai liang, zeffeero, tomas vrbada) are yandere, and they just kidnapped you. but you seem to not care...

a/n: sorry again for my late updates😭 anyways i was reading a yandere fic and i was like 'i would just give up and accept my fate if a yandere kidnapped me.' so here's some hcs based on that lil thought LMAOO

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johnny cage would be ECSTATIC when he notices how compliant you are. thank god he didn't have to force you to accept your new life, that would've been ugly. now, he can live out his fantasy of a perfect life with you! and don't worry about your needs such as food and water, he's got the money to take care of that. besides, now you're with THE johnny cage! other people would sell their soul to be in your spot. you're grateful for your new life, right? you have to now, because johnny is so excited to start a family with you very soon, whether you like it or not.

bi-han wouldn't be surprised that you submitted to him so easily. it was a wise choice to be obedient. if you didn't, bi-han would have to punish you. and we wouldn't want that, would we? obviously, bi-han's always had the power and resources to make sure you never escape in the first place, but since you're just so calm and compliant, he doesn't have to stress about that anymore. but that doesn't mean he's entirely trusting of you yet. he would still keep his guard up for the first few months of your capture, just in case you were deceiving him with your willingness. but overall, bi-han is glad that you are so compliant. he brings you outside every now and then as a reward for your obedience. who knows, maybe if you keep up your good behavior, he'll reward you even more.

kuai liang was not excited to take you in. he knew you'd probably resist him, but it's for the best! please don't kick and scream at him, he's doing this because he loves you. he's keeping you safe, there's a lot of bad people out there that could hurt you and he can protect you from them. as soon as you noticed you were in an unknown place, he braced for an argument of some sorts, until you casually addressed him and asked where you were. kuai liang explained your situation and told you that he was doing it because he loves you so much, and you'll understand someday. surprisingly, you simply nodded and shrugged, accepting your situation and deciding not to defy scorpion himself. he was relieved that you didn't have any qualms with your new life, especially after he put so much effort into mending your new living space to your liking. he worked very hard to provide you with enough of your necessities to make you never want to leave.

zeffeero is confused at how cooperative you are. he had an entire anxiety attack before he committed the act, berating himself for doing such an atrocious thing. he would've hated for you to despise him, even though he would've understood why. fortunately, his anxieties were put to rest as soon as he saw how casually you handled the situation. even though it left him wondering if you were as mentally sane as he thought you were. but that doesn't matter, because now zeffeero doesn't have to hold back on his affections. he took your compliance as a sign that you are okay with his twisted way of loving you. now, your life within those walls is a lot more suffocating than you thought it would be.

tomas vrbada had mixed feelings about the situation. if you woke up in an unknown place, surely you'd be pissed at him. so you would probably cuss him out, or even fight him physically. tomas doesn't want to hurt you, but at the same time, he would relish in your hatred for him. for some reason, tomas would get a strange high out of your assertion and he'd feel very flustered if you were ever aggressive towards him. you could yell at him for the smallest thing, and he'd just stare at you with adoration as if he was in a trance. even though he would love for you to yell and scream at him, he would ultimately prefer for you to be happy with him and your new life. tomas desperately wants to have a normal-ish relationship with you, so it would be best if you were compliant with him. thankfully, you ended up quite cooperative with tomas, and easily adjusted to your new life. it made him so happy that you accepted him, that he spoiled you with everything you could ever want. tomas is at your beck and call, and he will do anything to make you happy. except free you.

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factual-fantasy · 3 months

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22 ASKS!! :DD THANK YOU!! :} 🎉🎂🎉

GASPPP!! :DDD I'D LOVE TO!! :}} 💖💖

I've actually been thinking a lot about Louis and his story lately! Though, since drawing is rather taxing on me atm I haven't gotten around to making him a character study post.. Like I did for Cuttlefish.. BUT!! I have still made some story bits for him anyways! :DD 👇👇

I had this idea that he used to be an ordinary flavored cookie of some kind. And he used to live on land as this washed up fisherman that was really down on his luck.. he had lost his job, his home, his arm.. he had no friends.. no family.. nothing. He was really lost and alone..

Its around that time he was somehow welcomed aboard Seafoam's ship. It was just Seafoam, Octo and Ellie at the time. Louis found great comfort and security with this crew. He had never felt more welcome and wanted in his life.. This environment started to break down Louis' anxieties and depression overtime. Slowly turning him into the more jolly and boisterous Louis the crew knows him as today.

But things would take a seemingly bad turn when a curse befell Louis. Turning him into this half cookie, half crab beast. Louis' body had changed significantly, the biggest change being his huge crab arm. Now, most cookies would consider this ghastly new form to be what its intended to be. A curse.. But Louis.. actually didn't mind the changes. In fact, he liked his new body. Quite a lot! And though his new crab arm did cause him quite a bit of aches and pains.. and also took away his ability to swim.. he honestly considered it an upgrade!

Where before he had a missing arm and was completely useless in combat.. now he had this huge intimidating claw in its place! With his new found strength and power, he was a force to be reckoned with! Not only that, but he didn't see his new body as ugly, he thought he looked AWESOME! So he also got a major confidence boost too!

In present day, Louis is a confident, sociable, and all around happy person. And he gives all the credit to Seafoam and his crew for his new found zest for life! :}} ✨🦀💖✨

Anyways-- thank you for taking interest in Louis! :DD rn drawing is rather challenging for me, but I hope to draw him again someday soon! Maybe I can go back and make him his own character study post like I wanted to! 👀👀

I KNOWWW WAAAAAAA 😭😭😭💖💖💖💔💔💖

@pink088

XD Bibi would probably use it to make a cold glass or water for me🥺💖

And hey, thanks for the cake! :DD No doubt Cici will devour it XDD (Bibi allows it)

I suppose if I really wanted to I could learn how. But I don't want to turn my hobby into a job..

I made my first post on December 19th, 2018!! :00 That's roughly 4-5 years or so!

I use FireAlpaca! And I use a xp-pen 13.3 pro tablet ✨✨

As for that Undyne and Papyrus post.. The story behind it is, that Papyrus is from a different timeline. And in his original timeline.. Undyne is dead.. Now, this other Undyne knows that her Papyrus, the "real" Papyrus, is somewhere else in the underground. So this Papyrus is an imposter. She questions this imposter. "Who are you, and why do you look like Papyrus?" She waits for this imposter to answer.. But Papyrus has no words.. since his Undyne died, he hasn't heard her voice in a very long time... he's too shocked to speak..

I DO have a YouTube channel, and I was intending to make animations for it... but I lost my drive. Animations get stolen A LOT. And Animations take a ton of time to make. I was discouraged.. why would I spend so much time on something, if its more likely to be stolen?

Though I have been thinking about making sketch animatic memes... maybe once my health improves I could try to make one-

And hey! Don't worry about my arms, I can make several whether I'm feeling good or bad! :D

AND AAA THANK YOU!! :DD I'm glad you like him and noticed his eye details!! :}}}

(Post in question)

XDD Jangles is chaotic enough to sleep hanging upside down tho lets be real-

@yourstrulylightstar283 (In response to this post)

:DD Bibi gives his thanks!

@cudlycorncornsworthcoberson (In response to this post)

XDD I know right?? Another year has already come and gone, its crazy to think about! :00

And don't worry, I've been focusing all my energy on taking care of myself and drinking lots of water! 👍👍

Awe! Thank you so much!! :DD Right now the main thing I'm battling is my poor mental and physical health.. but I have high hopes that things will improve soon! :)))

@the-woomyverse (Post in question)

:DD Thank you! I'm glad you liked them!! :}}

As for Ludwig and Morton, unfortunately they don't have a lot of story built yet.. but I'm working on it! <:D

Ludwig is intended to be the eldest sibling, and heir to the throne. He's the "Prince of the Koopas". That post shows Ludwig seeming nervous.. and unsure. I'm experimenting with Ludwig taking his role as heir very seriously.. but its stressful. He feels like he's under a lot of pressure and has a loooot of responsibility to look forward to..

Though I'm kind'a going back on that a bit. The canon Ludwig seems pompous and a bit arrogant. Maybe I should keep some of that but in a positive way? I imagine that Bowser wouldn't force Ludwig to do this if he didn't want to. And I imagine that Kamek would have done very well to prepare Ludwig for his future kingly-hood.

What I mean by this is. I think a more.. confident, and level headed version of Ludwig would be appropriate. Rather than a pompous snob or a nervous wreck. He could be a young prince with a lot of wit and discipline. A price that is bound to make a fine king. 👑

For Morton I'm afraid there's even less story built for him 😭💔💔 Right now the main thing I'm experimenting with is Morton having some form of melanism. (Its a mutation where animals are born with excess pigment in their skin. Making their fur/hair/skin very dark/black when it otherwise would not have been.)

I could experiment with Morton not liking this aspect of himself..? Maybe it makes him feel out of place or insecure..? Though I doubt any of the individuals around him would have judged him or treated him differently at all for it.. even his siblings.

Idk, I just need some more time to think about him I suppose! <XDD Sorry!! 😭😭

Thank you!! :DD

@untitled-7613 (Post in question)

Thank you! :DD I'm glad you like them!! :}}

And Jimmy was a lovely gift, though I didn't create him! The factual fam is mostly intended to be made of characters that I can take credit for-

(Note- Jimmy was a nice gift, but please! I stand by only wanting comments <:} 💖💖)

@tallchest13-blog

Dawww, as far as I'm concerned, you've followed me twice! At least in spirit! XD

@couchwow

Hergn... but that takes efforttt... how about you tell me what you like about it first? :0

@neo-metalscottic

No problem!! :D And I wonder that about K Rool. I didn't actually realize that he would be very similar to Bowser.. hmm. Well, I'm thinking that even if he is close to Bowser in size, Bowser's got him beat by his fire breathing ability XDD And King/Big Koopa's overall could just be a tougher species-

As for the Super Stars, they have about the same status as the 1-Up Mushrooms. They are this extremely rare Power up that seems to only show up when its needed.

I've been experimenting with the toad people worshiping 1-Ups and the Delfino people worshiping Super Stars. These bizarre and wonderous powerups that are strongly tied to the prophecy and what not. They're also related to how Peach and Daisy became royalty..

Its a lot of complicated word spaghetti atm but the point I'm getting at- is that there is definitely more than one! And they are so powerful and so.. seemingly sentient, that they are seen as almost.. like.. these holy beings that bring about future events.

I haven't rambled about all that biz yet becuase I cant find proper words to figure out what I'm even thinking <XD Gonna need some more time on that one!--

And yes yes yes! The Commander is still around, and AWWW!! Is he really?? :DD That's so sweet! Thank you so much!! :}} I haven't thought much about what role he's played in raising the Koopalings, though I really should. While he isn't there to actually help raise them, he's always been around as they've grown up. Whether it be following Kamek around or doing some kind of work around the palace.

When it comes to Bowser returning injured.. I wonder. part of me thinks that he wouldn't return right away, so maybe his injury wasn't seen by the Commander. But the news of his defeat would certainly be bone chilling. Commander would be more tense around the palace. And probably extends his night watches a bit longer in an attempt to better protect the Koopalings..

On the last note, Yes! I do plan to redesign him once again XD or at least update him a little- Though drawing is very challenging for me atm.. so that'll have to wait a while!.. <XDD

@littlelightfish

WAAAA THIS ASK GAVE ME LIFFFEEEE!!😭😭💖💖💖 NO ITS NOT TOO INTENSE THE ONLY THING THAT IS INTENSE IS MY PURE JOY AT READING THIS OVER AND OVER WAAAHG THANK YOU SO MUVHCHH!!!💖💖💖💖😭😭💖💖

As for your questions! <XD --I've been thinking more about Tuna's character over the past few days and this got me thinking even more! :D

I imagined that when Tuna started out he was a real brat. Not super great to be around. He had some bottled up stuff for sure and was real rebellious and resistant to authority figures. Nobody was really willing to deal with his crap and always pushed back, which just made him more bratty.. for a while Seafoam wasn't sure what he was gonna do with this kid..

But then he reached some kind of middle ground with Ellie.

I have several ideas in mind for how this could go.. but I'll ramble about this one first- XDD

Ellie has thick skin and could tolerate the snarky remarks he made. She also didn't push back, even through she very easily could have. She knows that this kid has some serious inner battles and he doesn't need her snapping back at him.

And like some of the things you mentioned, it started out with Tuna just bumming around in the kitchen. Since Ellie could tolerate him she never kicked him out. Making the kitchen kind'a like a space where he could.. "get away" from the rest of the crew, in a sense..

Ellie was the first person to crack that outer shell of his. Providing him a consistent source of comfort, with her food and the quiet kitchen.

After some time the snarky remarks or comments would slow down.. over time he just resorts to standing around and watching her cook. Getting closer and closer.. eventually asking questions. "What are ye makin..?" "..what's that do..?" She would always reply genuinely. And as gently as she could considering her usual monotone voice <XD

Eventually it turns into "..where'd you learn to cook?" "..how long have you known Octo..?" "..do you trust Cuttlefish.?"

She could say kind things about the crew which gets Tuna to lighten up around them. "Octo seems mean but actually he's just blah blah blah..." Next time he interacts with Octo he's less tense. "Seafoam is genuinely as kind as he seems. If ye can trust anyone, its him." He starts listening to Seafoam more..

These interactions would continue to develop more and more. I don't know if he'd ever be able to help her cook anything- considering how strict she is about it <XDD But although I have several more ideas for this, I like this idea of Ellie really softening him up over time..

WAAHDH WALL OF TEXT--- Thank you again so much!!! :DD It makes my heart very happy to hear that you love Tuna and Ellie so much!! 🥰🥰

(Sorry for not being able to transfer your cookie gifs to this post! <:0)

Hmm.. that makes me wonder if the cookie run characters have.. cookies. Like, small cookies that THEY eat.

Something tells me they don't.. Which makes me think that seeing someone eat a normal cookie would still be horrifying! <XDD

@mrslilysnow

Awe! Thank you so much! :DD Such a pleasant and wholesome message to read, truly. :}}

I'm working out my feelings with the fandom.. tbh I think I'm just in a place where my emotions are all outa whack. And I'm just avoiding anything and everything that upsets me. 💔

I'm sure in a few weeks when I get my health back on track I'll feel better about the Octonauts fandom. Perhaps I'll even return with more updated designs! XD

@radicalrainbow

:DDD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I'm so glad to hear that!! :}}}

And huh.. its been a while since I've drawn the FNAF string beans hasn't it? Once I can get my health back on track I should draw them again! <XDD

@lampylamperson

Blue!💙💙 :DD Specifically shades similar to what ever this one is XDD 👇👇

:000....... FISH! :DD

@canonickero

SLJFKSJF THAT DISCRIPTION OF THE PIC XDDD JHASKDEJHV

And thank you! This makes me feel a lot better XDD

@beryl-shade

I think the cookie run games have cake/dog things..? I'm assuming the crews pet would be one of those :00

As for the names you've suggested, I love Patty, Pretzel, Muffin and Cornbread XDD such great names! :DD

#my response #factual fam #bibi #cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run ocs #my ocs #octonauts #undertale #deltarune #super mario bros

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daughterofthequeen · 9 months

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Big Baby

Pairings: Poe Dameron x reader

Request: can you maybe do poe dameron with a reader who just had to get incredibly painful shots and he goes to the appointment with them and just comforts and takes care of them during and after? im goin thru it rn LOL. totally okay if not tho!! <3 /gen

Requested by: @slide-the-ferret

Warnings: Needles(a personal fear of mine as well), it’s just a fluffy little one-shot nothing major, crying?, use of (y/n) a few times.

A/N: Yesss anon I 100% get what you mean. Now excuse me I gotta go water my grass with my tears because I don’t have a Poe Dameron to comfort me, in my times of pain and need😭 and the scenario of why they had to take shots I just pulled that out my tushy, meaning quarantine shots are not canon. I hope you enjoy.

Quarantine physicals are the worst! Why do I keep putting myself in these positions. It’s an easy mission, they said. You’re only scouting, they said. We’re relying on you, they said. The resistance has been looking for a new base and it’s proving pretty difficult. Every available fighter is constantly on the go, checking out any leads, back to back. I try to stay away from those types of missions though, all because of one thing. The quarantine physicals. After coming back from an exploration of an unknown planet, said pilots are required to be quarantined until they are cleared of their physical. It’s to make sure no undiscovered illnesses or anything of that nature came back with the pilot. And I’m pretty sure you can guess what happens if a unknown illness does come back, the planet is marked off the list of “maybe” planets and put on the “stay clear” list. And hopefully one of the known cures the doctors have work on said illness, but people coming back sick is rare, basically nonexistent. Recently, a well hidden planet actually came up on our scopes and guess who had to check it out? That’s right. Me!

All other pilots were out on their own missions, when I had just landed from a previous one with the rest of black squadron. Lucky me. I mean don’t get me wrong I would give my life for the resistance, but if medical shots are involved, it’s a hard “no” for me. It’s bad enough we have to get them every time we have an regular annual physical so, why would I add more to the list willingly.

Anyway, I’m currently sitting in the waiting area of the doctors office, waiting for my name to be called for my own quarantine physical. Normally, Poe would be in here with me. Yes it is against the rules but Poe and I are a special case, he helps the doctors by keeping me calm enough to take the injections. Wait a minute. Where is Poe?! He should be here by now! I quickly turned on my wrist comm preparing to tell him to get his butt down here but just as I was about to, he comes running through the door out of breath.

“Right on time.”

“Sorry I’m late.” He said as he takes a seat next to me.

“You forgot didn’t you?

“No. No, I didn’t forget. I just-“

“You forgot.”

“Yeah. Yeah I forgot.” He said lowly and we began laughing. It doesn’t take much for Poe to make my worries go away. It’s part of the reason why he’s my best friend. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

“It’s ok, you made it, you have nothing to be sorry for.” Just as I said that my name was called, and my anxiety went through the roof. Walking into the medical room, me sitting on the bed and Poe sitting in one of the guest chairs.

“Let’s see, (Y/n) (L/n), born on (P/n), occupation-pilot, what’s the last 4 digits of your chain code?”

“7980”

“I see that you’re here for your vaccine shots?” The nurse asked sitting down my medical folder.

“Yes.”

“Ok just sit back and relax, I’ll be back soon.”

I sat back, but I could not relax. How could I relax, I’m about to get stuck with painful needles. How do people find this easy? I didn’t even notice my leg bouncing until I felt Poe lay his hand on my knee.

“Relax.”

“Why do people keep telling me that?” And for some reason he found that funny.

“Because your stressing yourself out, and because the more tense you are the more it’s going to hurt. So you might wanna take the doctors advice on this one.”

“I don’t understand how people are able to relax during these things. The size of the needle doesn’t matter, they all feel the same. Painful.”

“Because of how quick the process is, the only reason it takes so long for you is because you fight the nurses. I’m pretty sure they know you by name, and the only reason they ask is because of protocol.” He laughs.

“Oh shut up, Poe.” I said while folding my arms as the nurse walks back into the room. Poe took this as his queue to stand and grab ahold of my hand, to comfort me and just in case he had to pin me down I suspect.

“Okay. I seen that you have a physical coming up. Would you like to get the shots for that out of the way now or wait?”

“I’ll wait” I said nervously

“Well in that case you only have two injections today.”

“Only?” I mumbled.

“You ready?”

“I guess.”

“Here is number one” I always feel bad for Poe, with how tight I squeeze his hands through these appointments, I’m pretty sure they become sore after. But he never complains so I don’t know for sure. Then I feel the needle piercing each layer of my skin agonizingly slow, and the pressure of the liquid being push into my arm.

“And number two.” This time I pressed my face into Poe’s torso, which he welcomed. And the same painful sensations went through my arm again. And soon the aching will begin throughout my arm, keeping me from being able to use it.

“All done, let me type up your papers then you are free to go.” The nurse said while walking back out to her computer.

“See? It wasn’t so bad.”

“We go through this every time Dameron. Yes, it was that bad. I just held my breath this time.”

“Did it work?”

“Barely.”

“Well I say that’s a win either way.”

“Alright you’re free to go.”

“Thank you.” Poe helped me down of the medical table and we walked to my room. I knew the pain was on its way, my arm was already starting to ache.

We made it inside my room and I sat down on my bed as Poe started the same routine that always follows after any appointment that includes me getting stuck with metal sticks. It’s the same every time, he starts my shower, while I’m in the shower he goes to the dining hall to get us both a meal, by the time he makes it back I’m already under my blankets, he joins me, we eat, and I end up falling asleep. It’s a very relaxing process and very sweet. I hear the shower start and I immediately stand and grab some clean pajamas and head to the bathroom seeing Poe checking the temperature.

“Remember to the warm water run in your arm to help ease the pain.”

“Yeah I know.”

“Okay, I will be right back and don’t wait til’ you get sleepy to get out the shower. You got lucky last time.”

“I was fine.”

“If you call falling asleep and almost falling in the shower fine. You’re lucky I forgot to ask what kind of juice you wanted. Speaking of which, what’s your choice for today?”

“Surprise me. And I had it under control.”

“You keep telling yourself that. Hurry and get in before the effects start kicking in, I’ll be right back.” I listened and got in the shower, making sure to let the warm water hit my arm. The steam from the shower, being freshly clean, and the side effects of the medicine was all starting to kick in. My arm was now aching and I was get sleepy. I got out the shower put my pajamas on and made my way to my bed. All of a sudden I felt my bed dip which woke me up from a slumber I didn’t know I was in.

“Wake up sweetheart it’s time to eat.”

I grumbled as Poe helped me sit up and once he made sure I was awake enough to eat he sat down my plate on my lap. He then got situated beside me and we started eating. Out of nowhere a sharp pain went through my arm causing me to let out a groan.

“Medicine starting to kick in?” To which I replied with a nod. I handed him my plate and he sat both to the side. He stripped off his tops layer of clothing so he was comfortable and got the both of us under the blankets. I made my place on top of his chest as sleep was calling me, and he was not helping as his hand was gently scratching my scalp.

“Thank you for always being there for me Poe.”

“Always. You mean more to me than all the stars in the galaxy. And whatever you need no matter how big or small, I’ll be there to help as much as I can.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“We’ll in that case there is one thing you can do.”

“And what’s that sweetheart?”

“Find a way to keep those evil people away from me.”

“What evil people sweetheart?”

“The doctors and nurses. They’re always trying to stick me with something, I’m starting to think they’re enjoying it.”

“Baby it’s their jobs and it’s only to keep you and everyone else safe. I mean you gotta admit needles aren’t that bad, the only thing painful about it are the side effects.”

“Excuse me, I have you know that needles are not as painless as you think, I swear I can feel every single layer of skin that the needle goes through.”

“I have to get shots too you know and they’re not bad.”

“To you.”

“You’re just a big baby.”

“Whatever.”

“But you’re my big baby.”

“Go to sleep Poe.”

And we did, enjoying the peace that being in each other’s arms brought, until the next morning when we are woken up by the alarm that lets everyone know, it’s time to get the day started.

#requested #star wars x reader #star wars fanfiction #poe dameron fanfiction #poe dameron x y/n #poe dameron x you #poe dameron #poe dameron x reader

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positivelypositive · 2 months

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Hihihi ! First of all wanna say I love ur page sm ty for posting ur personal motivational messages!! They are always so comforting. <333

I just wanted to rant about my major, since I’m in college and that’s like my whole life right now haha.. I keep struggling with getting bad grades (not failing, but not amazing enough to go to a good graduate school in the future). Even though it’s very common since I’m a STEM major in a fairly tough school/major, it doesn’t stop me from feeling like a failure and that I’ll never get better.. I know that I need to just keep taking steps to improve myself and my grades, but it’s so especially hard when my friends in the class are really complacent, settling for the bad grades and not trying to be creative with ways to improve themselves. They choose to be lazy instead and deal with the consequences by dropping a class or a minor that isn’t easy (relatively). I have one other friend in my major who is as motivated as me to do really well, but she isn’t doing the same minor that I’m aiming to do — so we don’t have those classes in common to relate with and help/motivate each other on. So if I’m struggling in the classes for my minor, I know my friends won’t be much help because they’re probably struggling more than me ! Or if they aren’t, they just aren’t as helpful in explaining things because they don’t have an intuitive grasp on it if that makes sense, and would rather just give me their answers.

Anyways, it’s just an overall frustrating experience, but I saw that u were accepting rants hahaha and I kinda needed to get this off my chest. What would u do in my situation? Try to maybe make some new friends? It’s hard because I try to avoid people with big egos (bc they’re annoying 😭 but sometimes they end up being the smartest/most motivated…) but I could also try going out of my comfort zone to meet new ppl, but I also have social anxiety so it’s scary hahahha

Much love 💕

hey anon,

thank you for your kind words! i'm so glad you took up my offer to rant and shared freely. lastly, i'm sorry if i'm getting back to you late. i have been away from my account for a little while and only saw this today.

now, on to what you shared- i want to begin by telling you how proud i am of you. you want to do better even when those surrounding you are complacent. that takes serious motivation. you're awesome!

as for not having someone to motivate you to do even better- i'm in a field where none of my friends or family had any experience so i was a loner for most of my career. eventually, i found people to share with but i understand where you're coming from.

i think youtube used to and still helps me the most. try to look up efficient study methods for your specific subjects or course type. now, it can get overwhelming because youtubers have their on-camera, pretty lives in extreme order.

what you want to do is start small. maybe pick one idea that you see common amongst a few videos and try implementing that. see if it works and then keep adding slowly.

remember to not overdo it. perfection is overrated and for a sincere person as yourself, it can quickly turn demotivating.

take care of yourself anon. you sound like a very pleasant person. feel free to drop by for another rant, anytime. sending you warmth and positive vibes ✨

#positively positive #anon ask #answered

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webslingingslasher · 2 months

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lil rant :) TW (?)

It's undiagnosed, and I don't want to say I have it bc of that, but it's pretty obvious that I have hypochondriac symptoms, pretty majorly, and it's been really bad since January. I have anxiety so it really stems from that, and it's just been making it worse. It doesn't help that I've been sick constantly since October.

I'm too scared to talk to anybody about this because I don't want to come off as annoying, because I'd just be constantly complaining about how I think I'm dying. Especially because I had an anxiety attack in January in front of my whole family, and that was so embarrassing for some reason, because of it. I did explain to them that I can't watch doctor shows because it makes me paranoid, and while they didn't seem to completely understand, they haven't put them on since I've said it.

I'm sick rn and I'm doing my best not to freak out because there's been so much talk lately about a young girl in my town who passed away, may she rest in peace, from the flu that caused pneumonia. I have no reason to be freaking out except that I have a nasty cough, but it says a cough can cause it?? I'm also freaking out because I think my coughing is making my blood pressure high and fuck it the amount of times I've thought I was having a heart attack the last few months is astounding.

I feel so bad because every time I show at least one symptom of something, I'm panicking. I'm not prepared or mentally strong enough to actually confide in anybody about this, but I needed to talk about it so I thought I'd do it here, if that's okay <3 I'm just so tired of being scared of my health, a part of me wishes I could be at a doctor's constantly just for reassurance.

Anyways, this was long and everywhere, I'm not sure if it made any sense but thanks for making me feel safe enough to talk about it!

<3🩰

you're not alone, anon! i deal with this too and i never talked about it because i knew logically it wasn't happening- but i also have this tick in the back of my head that makes me think i have some underlying disease and i'm dying.

so, i told my therapist and it turns out.... that's common. medical ocd or medical anxiety can be killer. the thing that helped me was that if i think i have a new disease or problem everyday vs one consistant one... i probably don't have it.

((i think of one solution. u need to date someone in the medical field 😭))

#🩰 anon

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crowhyun · 1 year

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helloo i'm from singapore and here's some things i can share about us! first off for food, you can literally find ANY food here, we have chinatown which is very popular during chinese new year for the many festive things they sell, we also have little india, which you can find many indian food places and shops,, we have golden mile , aka thai street, which sells tons of thai food etc!! you would be able to find hawker centres almost everywhere though, which would also have food of different cuisines you can get. it is also easily accessible to malaysia,, taking at least 30 mins to travel by bus depending on the crowd! as singapore is quite small, we don't have much places you can travel to when you have explored singapore, but travelling on a short trip to malaysia is always an option!

personally, the people i have meet and surrounded myself with are all very friendly, and no matter who you are, you won't be discriminated/look down on because of your race, since there are many different people who stay in singapore, so it is a common occurance to see other pocs and different people, especially in the central business district (CBD, aka where most of our more expensive tourist spots and hotels are located) of course if you search online, every once in a while you would see an auntie or uncle (we call all older women/men 'auntie' 'uncle' as a respect! no matter the language you speak :)) making racist remarks/being disrespectful, but i can assure you most of us aren't like that!

tourist spots wise, a popular place to visit would be a nearby island sentosa!! theres hotels there but its on the higher end side as its basically an island,, and our attractions such as SEA aquarium/Universal Studios is located there! you can also access islands and batam from our jetties!

overall, i think singapore is quite nice to live in, especially since i do part time jobs, and the pay is enough to sustain me because you can easily get affordable food from hawker centres and coffee shops, unlike our title, clean and green, we're not very clean but we're trying! especially because of the very strict fines and law here, and littering can literally cost you $10,000 😭 and theres cameras almost everywhere, so it is quite safe, though still dangerous once in a while

omg i love this ur like a little tour guide hehe

I’m so late tho 😭 but thank you for this info! I especially like how there’s many food choices. I’m from a small city in a rather boring state in the US, so food variety is not a bit thing here, yet it’s something that I want so bad. Another thing that’s not common here is the public transportation. Driving is really scary for me, so i’d much rather take a bus or train!

I’m thinking of maybe going to Singapore for med school, but that’s a far off plan of mine, so we’ll see. When I did my research, I noticed how many different people lived there. In america, ofc it’s very diverse, but once again lol I live in a small city, so I don’t see many different people, especially with the language differences.

And the SAFETY! YES! I NEED SAFETY! As someone who has pretty bad anxiety and is paranoid, even going out to run errands or to work is scary bcs you never know what will happen. There’s daily shootings where I live and it’s seen as normal here, so safety is rlly important for me when i’m looking for a place to stay in the future. Anyways, thanks for letting me know everything. heart heart :DDDDDDD

#crowhyun answers

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pixiecaps · 2 years

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I remember like, the first time I saw you. I hadn’t recognized your pfp, and after seeing it a few times on my dash I decided to click. After scrolling a bit, I came to the realization I had followed you on accident (something that happens plenty to me). I usually would’ve unfollowed, but you seemed just interesting enough for me not too. A few months later, I’m surprised when you follow me back, especially since I don’t make original posts, and am not ranboo-centric.

Nowadays, you’ve managed to become one of my favorite mutuals. I always get giddy when I see you in my notifications, and 90% of the time I make note to see what post you liked and/or reblogged. It’s the “I’m getting a good grade in reblogging, something that is both possible to achieve and normal to want.”

We aren’t close mutuals, though I definitely wouldn’t mind it. I’d love to send more asks, however I’m horrific at carrying conversations and also have some social anxiety that makes me nervous. I also don’t want to intrude, as previously mentioned we aren’t close mutuals, and I don’t want to be pushy or annoying, haha. And I would start by responding to some of the posts you make that expect responses, but I don’t refresh my dashboard enough to see them in time. And I don’t know if it’d be appropriate to ask for a discord, which I’m better at checking, because I know it’s usually used for friends.

All in all though, you are funny and witty, and I often to stop and read your posts when otherwise I’d scroll. I like your opinions when you do decide to get serious, and despite some non-common interests, you present them in such a way I can easily engage in anyways. I wish you lots of love and luck, take care of yourself, and keep your chin up, king!

(P.S. sorry for the rlly long message whoops, I hope I’m not too late to send this.)

helllooo anon i think this was for the ask game:0 im sorry i didnt see this hours ago im pretty sure you sent this around the time i went to sleep but yes hii hello!!

“interesting enough” LETS FUCKING GOOO. okay! i usually follow back people i’ve seen around a lot on dash or urls i recognize in my notifs!! i must have recognized you:)

thats so sweet thank you i appreciate it😭 also wanna thank you for sticking around the idea that you’ve grown to rlly be fond of me after accidentally following me is heartwarming

ah dude don’t worry about. look i started this blog because i had horrific social anxiety and my irls were encouraging me to make new friends!! so even though i was shaking and wanted to throw up (that bad ik) i started posting and slowly but surely it wasn’t as scary anymore. it takes time so you can take your time dont feel pressured to interact if you dont want to. that being said i don’t mind if people who arent “close mutuals” send an ask or dms me. you become a close mutual by doing these things ya know😭 oh!!!! you can ask for discord too!! all mutuals are allowed to :) i however suck at holding conversations too so be aware of that lmao

AW TY!! ehehe you like my takes🤭 genuinely though i try to stay away from discourse or serious topics cus it may come off intimidating and thats the last thing i want to come off as but im glad whenever i do make a few posts like that you found it easy to engage:) i will! i am trying my best to take care of myself and for u i shall hmmm i was gonna say go outside but i already have plans to do that so it’d be disingenuous. i’ll just drink a lot of water today 👍 omg have u ever noticed theres no water bottle emoji on ios. i wait every update to see if they added one but nope. i would use that emoji so much…

anon congrats on getting the award of longest ask ever sent BAHSJD i woke up and saw this and my eyes popped in a good way

( also adding this after i posted this. i know anons dont usually like their own asks to stay hidden so i need you to know you seem lovely:D )

#pix asks aaaa #anon #long post

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asongforthelife · 2 months

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Hwey sorry to vent here but fuck.

I seriously feel so bad for my sibs man like I can see them being slowly ripped apart day by day by our narc mother. I am too, I just don't say anything obviously because I don't want to cause any more anxiety for them. It's bad enough as it is. In all honesty I feel trapped too. I can't ever say anythng to her because she just backs herself into a corner and then cries "gaslighting gaslighting 😭😭🥺🥺" when she knows she's wrong. Also another fucked thing that just makes me so incredibly angry to no end is that she is a raging Zionist lol

Everytime she says something just so bigoted towards the people of Palestine or talks about how "Israelis are the victims" I try my HARDEST to not say anything but it just ends up slipping out anyways and causing a giant fight. She's already threatened to kick me out for supporting Palestine and being outspoken. (I'm a minor under 17 with nowhere to go.)

I suppose there's like my girlfriends house?? But I don't like her mom either. Her mom constantly gets mad at me for the smallest things and then in turn gets mad at my girlfriend for what I did. I don't have the energy to be in that household either. Idunno man I'm just trapped. No money, no job, trapped in the late stages of capitalism and poverty, with a mentally and emotionally abusive narcissistic mother. Idk man I'm fucked when I turn 18. The economy is literally dying right now it's just the great depression all over again. My mental health is declining slowly and it doesn't help that I can see my siblings suffering too. I just want the best for them and honestly I'd rather they move out, even if it means I have to stay with my narc mother. I just don't want to see them suffer and be ripped apart by her anymore. It hurts. It really fucking hurts man.

#personal #vent #I don't think I'm ever making it out of this abusive home situation honestly #I'm fucked #If I somehow had the opportunity at any point to move out though I don't want to leave my poor dad here #She's so abusive towards him too #He's on the brink of being disabled. He has MS and my mom abuses him with the “You're nothing without me” mindset. It hurts #I know my dad is hurting too but he tries to stay strong for the sake of his children and his own life #He's got nowhere to go with no close or personal attachments to anyone. And he's disabled just trying his hardest to get by

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fellthemarvelous · 5 months

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Hello lovely mutual! I’m normally more of a lurker and not normally one to reach out to strangers, but I saw you’re recent post about having a bad anxiety day and decided to push back against my own anxiety a little. I, too, having being having a rough go of it lately. The racing, pounding heart, the spiraling negative thoughts, feeling like I don’t know or can’t trust my own mind. I see you, I get it.

And I wanted to reach out to tell you that your blog has brought me comfort these past couple weeks. Every time you post I’m like “omg yessss!!!” I came for the good omens, stayed for the politics, and definitely knew I was in the right place when I saw you share my love of Spike!

Anyway, to close out this wine drunk ramble, thanks for being brave enough to talk about your struggles. I wouldn’t wish those kinds of feelings on my worst enemy, but it does help a little to know that none of us are alone in this. I hope you get a reprieve soon. I’m rooting for you and I’m glad you exist!

I'm sorry you're having a rough go with anxiety lately as well! I am one of those people who always makes my situation worse because I avoid dealing with my problems by putting them off and leaving them for Future Me to deal with, which contributes to the self-loathing because of how angry I become with myself for losing the ability to function properly, but it's also how I learned how to cope with life as a small child. It's scary when you struggle to trust your own mind. I doubt myself all the time because of it. It's sad to realize just how many people struggle with these same problems but we all feel alone even though we aren't.

I'm really glad my blog brings you comfort and I hope it continues to do so!

Finding another Spike fan is such a joy!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!

He is my ALL-TIME FAVORITE FICTIONAL CHARACTER!!!!! He brings me so much joy because he's so fucking fascinating and he had the mother of all redemption arcs. I could go on about him for HOURS!!!!!!!

James Marsters took that role, knowing they were going to kill Spike off a few episodes later, and said FUCK THIS by making the fans love him so much that they ended up having to add him on full-time in season four and then moving him over to Angel after Buffy ended.

Look at this soulless monster sobbing over the dead body of his mortal enemy that he fell in love with!! 😭

He watched Passions with Buffy's mom and babysat Buffy's sister. He mourned Joyce when she died and he let a god beat the ever-loving shit out of him just to protect Dawn and all of this was long before he even went and fought to have his soul returned to him.

I love the way that even after he was turned into a vampire, William never really left. Whatever demon took over his body inherited William's mommy issues and he still wrote poetry and took care of Drusilla after she was injured because he loved her so much.

I love the way that Spike went to Joyce after Drusilla dumped him because he needed someone to talk to and she gave him hot chocolate with the little marshmallows that he loved.

Buffy: My mom! Spike: OUR mom! Buffy: 😤

Angel was cursed with a soul but Spike fought for his because he was horrified by the monster he was.

Spike is a fucking icon and I will love him for the rest of my life.

My boy proved himself to Buffy and he became her biggest defender when all her friends turned against her. I LOVE HIM.

He sacrificed his life so Buffy could keep living hers. 😭

#answer #saltyhunters #anxiety #mental health #you are not alone 💙#spike #i fucking adore him so much #i didn't mean to go on about him this long #but i just have a lot of feelings

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free--therapy · 6 months

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Also, I've recently been worrying about something else too.

I'm sorry this is kinda long because this topic was important to me but I didn't know how to express myself we'll enough so ended up writing a lot 😭

So you know how I've mentioned multiple times how the period from January 2022 to June 2023 (about a year and a half) has been overall a healthy period in terms of my mental health? I mean, I sure did have some few setbacks in that period too but it's been pretty manageable or overall, it's been very good I guess. Because none of the day/weeks/months in that whole period is defined by me worrying or overthinking. So like when I reflect over that year and a half, the overthinking or worrying is not what defines that period because it's been so less and instead I actually remember the other things that happened in my life first. Which is progress for me.

So this setback since July this year is my first "major" setback. Though this whole anxiety/overthinking actually began in late 2020; even so, from August 2020 to December 2021, I've still had few months in between that period where I'd been doing very good too but overall the setbacks were much more frequent or I was even denying certain things I'd say. That is why I consider that I "actually" genuinely started healing around the very end of 2021 where I was in therapy.

I've always thought and believed that the whole chapter of bad anxiety and overthinking during the lockdown period is closed and gone now. Since my thinking and whole "idea" of anxiety and healing started getting much better by the every end of 2021 and especially since 2022 started, so I always considered that whole bad anxiety and unhealthy coping mechanism chapter closed.

Because I used to constantly google stuff or spend whole day on anxiety forums and stuff or asking advice online- just the whole bad stuff I did in the late 2020 and early part of 2021. Then, I had a good period from Feb to July 2021 but I was just in denial though but still, it was a good period nonetheless. Then anxiety and overthinking hit again in August 2021. Anyway, I had habits of searching stuff online and I would overthink even the tiniest things and I had a very bad idea about anxiety....like seeing it as some "end all" or "destructive" illness that will stop me from living normally ever again or something.

Anyway, I mean I just had heaps of bad coping mechanisms and my ideas or thoughts about anxiety and related stuff were wrong or too extreme as such. And I wouldn't even consider sharing any of my thoughts or worries with people in my life which has now changed since I do share at least some thoughts with my sister and a friend too now. And I needed a lot of reassurance too and almost depended on it. Anyway, that's what I mean by the whole "lockdown anxiety chapter" because this whole thing was new to me back then.

I stopped the self-sabotaging and negative habits that weren't helping me and started trying to think in a better way since I started therapy in late 2021 which showed its effects and helped me so by the time 2022 rolled in, I was doing much better. Also, I left a very toxic obsession/interest I had around that time too.

Anyway, since I've been in this setback this time around, my mind has been sort of making me think thoughts like

"What if you actually never moved on?" "What if this whole good period was not true and just you being busy?"

"What if that anxiety 'chapter' from back then is still going on?"

"What if this good period of a year and a half was just nothing and actually this setback is what is real?"

"What if you actually never moved on from that lockdown period anxiety?"

Basically my mind has been trying to convince me that actually the period that I considered "chapter closed"or that I considered I had "moved on from" actually is still going on? What if I actually never healed and this whole good year and a half I had was just me keeping myself busy and distracting myself? What if this setback is just a continuation of the whole thing from 202-2021 again? Then what?

Was I wrong to believe that I had moved on? Did I never heal or move on at all? I've had some amazing times in the past year and a half. So even the idea that it wasn't my healed self and that it was just me being temporarily away from the anxiety/overthinking is so sad to me.

But also, I know this is very much my mind trying to convince me of wild things again. I know I did heal and learn better things. I know I have moved on from that whole thing. But it's hard to believe that.

Still, I keep getting thoughts like "What if that time is back again?" "What if this is the same as what it was back then?" "Then doesn't that mean that time is pretty much back?"

Especially since it's not like everything magically disappeared by the start of 2022. It's just that by that time, I had better ways of thinking at least to a point where I stopped letting it consume my mind everyday. Of course, a big help in that was that the country opened up in January 2022 and I started going to university physically again and started having actual things to do. Of course, I still had some fears and flawed thoughts or ideas about certain things (like ocd) around then too but it's just that I realised that I'm overthinking and don't have to spend any more energy over "solving" it.

But now this thought has me feeling like.....the whole period from back then (lockdown days) has always been continuing and never ended or something and that the whole good period was actually just a temporary thing or something 😭

Honestly, I hate the idea since I've always considered that chapter of my life as closed and me moving on slowly but surely. But then, what does this setback mean?

I mean, is it okay to believe that the worst part that I believe to be over (which was the whole lockdown anxiety thing) is really over? Am I really okay? Even if I still have some few misconceptions from back then or some thoughts that I still need to build better perspectives over, is it still okay to consider those days to truly have gone? Did I really start moving on since 2022 started? Or was I just convincing myself and things are the same again?

I mean, since I was overthinking then and I'm overthinking now so my mind is like.... what's the difference? On top of that, like I said, there are certain things from back then that I still have to get over but it's nothing as bad as it was back then. And I have much better habits and perspectives this time around even if the overthinking does get bad sometimes.

So me thinking that "I've moved on" and since the beginning of 2022, I really have been doing better and healing......is that okay to believe? Even if I do have things to still heal from or even if certain thoughts that I thought I was "over" are back again, is it okay to believe that I did, in fact, move on and have been moving forward really? Is it still okay to consider that chapter closed?

Have I really been moving forward especially since the start of 2022? Despite the small setbacks here and there? Or am I just convincing myself of it?

Even if I'm having this big setback since months ago, am I still doing overall better than back then? Is it okay to believe that?

Like I know even since 2022 started, I did still have times where certain thoughts (old or new) came up but I managed to deal with them within minutes or at least they didn't take up my mind or my day in any way. The thoughts never magically disappeared but I stopped letting them have their power over me most times. I did have a setback around mid 2022 though which lasted almost a month but even then I tried my best to practice better thinking patterns and dragged myself out of it. Even after that, I had times where I would worry about certain thoughts (and I guess you remember it too, me asking for advice around the whole period) but the point is: after 2021 ended, I almost never let it consume my life at all. I always told myself "I'm moving on" and it was just after thoughts and minor setbacks which I dealt with on my own and with your help too!

Which is why I consider the whole lockdown anxiety period to be worst of it and I consider that chapter closed and that I did truly start moving on since 2022 started. But what about this setback this time? (Though I do know that with this setback, it hasn't completely taken over my life the way it did back then. Maybe one of the reasons is that the lockdown is no more but also, I can implement better thinking patterns now and look at the bigger picture and I can manage to come to my own conclusions too! I don't think of it as the end of the world like I used to back then and try to think of better perspectives)

Is this just overthinking too? Am I okay? Have I really have been truly moving on since 2022 started despite the minor setbacks here and there?

If I had to put it simply.... it's like asking does this big setback this time mean that all the progress until now has been erased? Or that it never was progress at all? Was I just convincing myself when really I was just distracting myself? Is it still the same as it was during 2020/2021? Is this still that period going on? Or have I truly have moved on and have been healing especially since 2022 started? Despite the minor setbacks and some flaws in thinking patterns here and there? And despite this big setback? Is it okay that I'm not back to how I was during that period of lockdown when my anxiety first started? Has all that this "good" time really mattered after all?

So like, there were things I worried a lot about in 2021 that I mostly stopped bothering about. So after lockdown ended in 2022 and life actually started getting happening again, even when those thoughts did come to mind, I would be like "yeah whatever I know I'm fine and this isn't true and so I don't have to spend more time on this" and I just didn't dwell too much on the topic at all and didn't feel any need to either and that was how it was for a whole year and a half and yet few months ago, I suddenly remembered those same thoughts but just thought about them from a different perspective and suddenly, it made me so anxious. And that started the whole downward spiral since July this year with the anxiety and overthinking. Since then I've collected so many new topics or related new thoughts about old topics to worry about 😭

So does that mean I never healed from them? Because that is scary tbh. Or is it possible that we can heal from certain thoughts and yet sometimes we can still get bothered by it and have to learn to control our response better? Because new thoughts related to old worries might always pop up and we might sometimes get bothered by them, so that can't mean we never heal right? I can only assume that having worry thoughts here and there is common for almost everyone though and not just people who get anxious more easily.

But new or old, either way, is it okay to believe that I had moved on and was healing after all especially after the lockdown thing? Have I been okay after all? Or was I just distracting myself and never moved on? 😭

Do you think this is just my mind trying to convince me of random stuff again?

What do you think? Have you ever felt anything like this?

Also, thank you for reading as always and for being so patient and kind to me 🥹🫶

Hey Anon,

One thing I hope you to understand is that healing is a non-stop process. Yes, you'll have moments where you overcome so many things and you feel on top of the world and like you've finally conquered and closed certain chapters, but then new (or old things) may come back up that make you feel like you've taken steps backwards. This is all considered normal and nothing that should be seen as you reversing any progress that you've made already. You are definitely in a much different place now than you were back then because you have learned so much since that time and now you have more tools than you did before to help you overcome these thoughts that seem to be coming back.

You were not at all wrong to believe you moved on because for that time being, it really did feel like you were able to overcome the battle at the time, and you probably did. Things that are unhealed will come back up to the surface again though, so you don't have to feel discouraged if you feel like you didn't actually close that chapter after all. Sometimes we can't conquer every aspect of a certain worry or thought because of how complex thoughts can be. Your mind will always be searching for new things to be worried about, so it'll even dig back into the depths of those old worries to see if there's anything that's still there that's worth being anxious about. This is where you pull out your tool belt of skills you've acquired along the way and put them to the test! You already know how to overcome these thoughts because you've done it before, the challenge is not letting yourself become discouraged or hateful towards yourself because it's there again. You know what to do to defeat it, you just have to do it again :)

Anon, you are moving in the right direction, trust me. I know it doesn't feel like it because you're coming around to similar challenges again, but you're more prepared this time around to face the worries. You're on the right path and you will get through this, just keep going ❤

#ask #answered #anon #overthinking #anxiety #rumination #the healing journey

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jjungkookislife · 1 year

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I’m here 🖐 but late, as always 😣 I just saw the update for Secret and damn I was not disappointed. I knew they would be chaotic. My fav part was Yoongi making fun of her “we know Kookie” cause girl, it took you long enough 🙄 like they haven’t been telling her that and she just kept being indenial 😑 but anyways, I really love their friend group. That is why i get really excited when you make the social media chapters cause it portrays how much they are so chaotically hilarious. 2seok being a mess is just 🫠🫣😅😂 but also, I missed the drabble night AGAIN 😩 My timing always sucks, I need to remember that it’s usually fri/sat 😣 and I also didn’t get where they saw the prompt list cause I didn’t and I checked your page twice. Anyways, this was a really fun update, thank you for it ☺️

Hello! I have a bonus part coming this week 😅 I planned to post it yesterday but it takes my computer 3 business days to turn on and I’m just over it 😩

Ah thank you! I always tell my husband if I didn’t have such bad anxiety, I’d be a comedian but crowds just terrify me 😭 but I’m so glad you enjoy the chaos! I love smaus where they’re chaotic and hilarious and meddle ugh love the meddling 😭😭😭 I HAD to include hobi in that outfit! I think about it often 👀

Ah I’ll probably be doing another one soon! I did it on Friday but tumblr want very active (which is fine but I worked that day) and I went to bed a lot earlier bc I only had the 2. Work really drains me and trying to do drabble night on a work day isn’t great 😭 I hate working thirds but unfortunately I’m stuck there for a few more months (hopefully). Next time I will probably shoot for a Saturday evening but I like having wine when I do drabble night and I hate being hungover on Sunday bc I work that night 😭 I swear working thirds just doesn’t add up for me but oh well I literally chose this 🤣

I will probably use the same list next time (there was some good ones on there) and I wanted to continue yesterday but I ended up being busy and then I went to bed at 6pm 🤣

Thank you 💜 I’ll give more notice next time but I’m thinking maybe Saturday, July 2?

#oof I need to fix my request sheet bc #I thought the 4th was on Sunday 💀#I think I confused myself lmao #the joy of working thirds #I never know what day anything is

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chordataa · 1 year

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Soooo not to be gay there's this guy I like hahaha

Been on him since we started talking which was from last year but he met Mr around all the crazy time with tam anywhoooo

I'm going hotel 😭 someone send me good energy pray for me things go well,

My luck with men has been a jokeeee lately worst thing is I'm going for guys that aren't even my type like that but this one is my type so I'm extra nervousness like we have alot in common only thing is his little younger then me by 2 years which isn't that bad but younger men are usually slyly stress but he doesn't seem the type to do the maddest of things but I could be wrong the boy is a scorpio 🤣🤣🤣 anywhoooooo I'm hoping all goes well and my anxiety doesn't act up

This weekend has been stress enough having to let go of one sneaky links cos he wanted to act up around my people how you tryna make me mad and then complain I'm seeing someone else like you ain't my man 🫠��🫠 anyways burn that bridge,

manifesting everything checks out tomorrow cause I actually really like this one 🙃🙃🙃🙃

#me #my dating life #personal

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poirot · 2 years

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the last couple weeks reminded me of how much I hate social media culture 😭 sometimes I think I would be so much happier if I just deleted all my socials but then I remember how addicted I am to social media and don‘t have the guts to actually do it ahsjdje

#yes this is prompted by the heard/depp case lol #people from either side are so fucking tiring #i blocked like every possible word relating to this case #and still see posts about it 😭#like HOW #anyways #social media can be so tiring #because people will have the dumbest most uninformed opinion #which I guess is true for ‚real life‘ interactions as well ahsjd #but gladly I avoid any form of human contact in my ‚offline‘ life #anxiety can be a blessing sometimes LOL ahsje #also with pride month there is so much hate coming up as well #and I just don‘t WANNA SEE IT 😭#i really don‘t need to know how many ignorant assholes exist #my anxiety is bad enough lately anyways 😭#idk idk I just hate social media sometimes ahsjd #but then I’m also really obsessed with it LOL #ignore me *sighs*#i stopped taking my anxiety meds and I’m going through it tm #shut up sabrina

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jeweled-blue-eyes · 3 years

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i’m looking at that soulmate au 2 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 ok but just imagineeee ijekiel feeling dread and anxiety and despair, he’s so short of breath but doesn’t know why. when he sees athy begging to her father. when she’s on her knees. he’s confused, he doesn’t know her that well, he wonders if it is empathy. he thinks, perhaps,it is jennette, because she was poisoned, right? the day of the pitiful princess’s execution, his anxiety increases. he thinks he can barely walk,but he goes to see her anyway. even though he’s realized he doesn’t feel romantic love for jennette, he thinks this anxiety is hers, from losing her own sister. as soon as athanasia’s body drops, he can’t breathe anymore. the execution was botched, and since her neck didn’t break immediately, she is strangled to death. ijekiel is on his knees now, he can feel the noose around his own neck, and they struggle and he gasps for air until she stops. after her passing, it’s as if ijekiel has become a different person. he’s numb; as if all of his brightness, and his calm, as if it all has been drained out from him. he looks at jennette once, and then twice again, and he is unable to comfort her.

hdhfjfkfckkc i’m so sorry 😭🥺 it’s just very good ugh my writing is kinda shit and too dramatic but i hope it’s not that bad :((((

Aaaahhh give me all your tragic athykiels!

After Athy's execution Ijekiel feels just dead inside. Like a walking corpse. None of the countless healers and mages that Roger summonded can find the source of his troubles. He's physically perfectly healthy they say. He eats, he sleeps, he answers politely when he is asked something, yet it is as if his mind wandered elsewhere. On late evenings when he’s finished with his duties, Roger is surprised not to find his son in company of Jennette, instead he prefers to remain in solitude, locks himself up in his room or visits the graveyard and lays flowers upon that woman’s grave. If he talks at all it’s to ask the maids questions about their previous mistress (what was she like? what bought her happiness? what did she like to eat/drink? how did she spend her leisure time?). Ijekiel’s wardrobe gets gradually replaced by plainer clothes in the colors of washed out blue, he starts to seek out Jennette again, and even eats the overly sweet chocolate cake Jennette bakes for him that he once used to dislike. Even though he can’t taste anything anymore it eases his pain, it feels as if he were closer to his beloved if he mirrored what she would have done. But it’s nearly not enough. And one day when he flees to his room, suffocated from Jennette’s love and drained from every bit of affection that she forced out of him, he slowly loosens his tie and stares at it and wonders, considers, just for a split second, just how much longer must he endure until he can meet her again?

#anon #answered asks #concepts #athykiel soulmate au #Ijekiel committing lovers suicide

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